#jesper fahey x reader fluff

[jahayla-parker]

writing prompt:

"We can't afford to gamble like this."

"Are you kidding? This is the perfect time to gamble."

for character of choice

To Gamble or Not To Gamble: Jesper Fahey x Reader

Description: 6.6k wc, Jesper and reader find themselves in a situation where they must decide how to proceed and Jesper suggests he puts his gambling skills to the test.

Warning: mention of injuries and some descriptions of that and blood, angst but happy ending, guilt and remorse, curse words, typical six of crows warnings, mentions of gambling and addiction.

“How are we supposed to sneak it off the table?” Y/n groaned, the side of her head resting against the brick wall in annoyance.

Kaz had sent her and Jesper to retrieve some antique chest that had saints-knows-what inside of it.

According to the intel Kaz had, it was supposed to be here, this dingy and cramped gambling den that is buried deep in the abandoned outskirts of the barrel.

The gambling den also operated as an auction house whenever their crew’s leader came into possession of something worthwhile; such as this allegedly valuable chest.

Kaz’s intel was right about the chest being present.

However, the chest was not up for sale during some auction.

Instead, it was being used by some gambler as payment for his night.

Y/n had frequented enough of these shabby gambling sites around Ketterdamn to know that it was rare for a gambling house to let someone pay in anything other than Kruge.

But anyone who looked at the chest, its shine nearly blinding despite its evident old age, knew it was likely worth a hefty price.

Not to mention, the house likely knew what was allegedly inside of it.

It would help if Jesper and y/n had been told of it’s contents, but Kaz once again elected not to share this crucial detail.

So, here they were leaning against the entrance to the smoky gambling hall trying to decide how to proceed.

A simple theft was one thing, but now that the gambling den’s customer had used the chest as payment for however many hands the house had agreed to, it was being closely monitored by countless guards and in full view of the remaining patrons.

“Relax love,” Jesper grinned, kissing her cheek, “I have an idea”.

“Care to share there, Jes?” Y/n teased, pulling her slumped frame off the bricks.

“If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” he winked.

Y/n laughed and rolled her eyes, “Jesper, they aren’t going to let that chest leave here”.

“They won’t have a choice if we win it” Jesper said, with a shimmer in his pupils.

“How are we going to do that?” Y/n asked, scanning the room.

“Do you see how the chest is resting on the table to the right, along with that box of Nastoki?” Jesper asked, placing his arm over her shoulder.

As her eyes made contact with the overpriced alcoholic import in question, she nodded.

“That means it’s not just being used in exchange to fund a few hands for whatever mercher brought it here. Instead, it’s up for grabs, assuming one wins at least the total amount the house exchanged for it, plus usually twenty five percent profit.” He explained confidently.

“Okay, so, I somehow calculate the worth of the chest.. maybe by asking around without striking suspicion? Even if so, how do we get it? Claim we played a few hands and then offer the money from Kaz as our alleged earnings in exchange for whatever it’s worth?” She questioningly planned aloud.

“No darling, it’s much simpler than that; I play for it” Jesper winked, smirking over at his girlfriend before looking at the den ahead of them.

“Jesper, honey, Kaz doesn’t want you -“ y/n began, feeling iffy about the idea.

“I know, I know, but come on it’ll be fun!” Jesper pleaded, practically bouncing with excitement.

“Jesper, we cannot afford to gamble like this” she told him.

“Are you kidding? This is the perfect time to gamble” he joked, flashing the kruge from Kaz.

“Unless we lose, then we’ll be far worse off than if we just tell Kaz we couldn’t get it today” y/n pointed out.

She didn’t really fear Kaz herself, but she knew that regardless of the outcome, Kaz wouldn’t react well to Jesper’s idea and that Jesper would in turn, pout the rest of the day until Kaz moved on.

“We won’t lose” Jesper said confidently.

“How do you know that Jesper?” Y/n sighed.

She didn’t want to make him feel bad about this, but she also needed to keep him level headed.

“‘Cause I’ve got you. You’re good luck” Jesper grinned, kissing her cheek flirtatiously.

Rolling her eyes she whispered “come on, let’s just go Jesp”.

“Doll, I’m serious, we can easily get that chest, we just gotta play a few rounds and it’ll be ours” Jesper swore, playing with the hair that hung on the sides of her face just next to her temples.

“Kaz will kill us, that is unless they kill us first” y/n resisted.

“Nah” Jesper said, wrapping his arm back over her shoulder, “we’ll be fine”.

She rolled her eyes, “no Jesper, now come on, we need to get out of here”.

“Kaz wanted us to grab the chest” Jesper argued, getting a bit irritated now.

He found a solution!

Why wasn’t she letting him fix this predicament?

“Yes, but not in this way” y/n reminded him.

He shrugged carefree, “then he should’ve specificed”.

“Jesper again, Kaz’s money or not, we cannot afford to gamble like this” y/n said, her eyes making note of each weapon she could spot the patrons hiding on their bodies.

“Love! Are you kidding?! I’m serious about this being the perfect time to gamble” Jesper defended.

“For you, I’m not sure there is such thing” she scoffed, giving him a soft but knowing look.

She wasn’t going to get on him about his issues, but she was also not going to encourage him to partake.

“Rude” Jesper feigned offense, “let me show you what I can do.“

While he knew she meant no harm and didn’t judge him, he wanted to show her this wasn’t a big deal.

He wanted her to see that he didn’t always lose the way Kaz liked to tell her he did.

Jesper cupped her face with his palm, “let’s go”.

As he guided her across the hall, his right hand never left her waist.

His left hand was resting on his hip, signaling to everyone he was carrying a gun should they try anything.

He was well aware that this wasn’t the most reputable gambling house in Ketterdam.

As such, he wasn’t sure how these patrons would behave around someone as radiating as Jesper found y/n to be.

He slid into an empty seat at one of the scuffed up dark mahogany tables.

Jesper tapped her hip bone softly as he guided her to sit down.

As she sat cautiously on his leg, he whispered into her ear, “relax love”.

“It’s not a good idea, Jes” she stubbornly stated, head buried in his neck making it seem flirtatious instead of appearing as a random couple suspiciously whispering inside the den.

As Jesper signaled that he’d be joining the game, he rubbed her back, “want to bet?”

Y/n leaned back to look into his fieldstone colored eyes, “ isn’t that already what you’re doing?”.

He smirked and kissed her cheek before turning his attention to the table.

Jesper was feeling lucky tonight.

He wasn’t lying when he said she was his lucky charm.

Perhaps it was merely that he paid more attention to the bets in an attempt to impress her.

Tonight only fueled that desire.

He knew Kaz had told her of his frustration with Jesper’s gambling.

He knew Kaz saw it as problematic and to be fair Jesper knew it could cause problems from time to time.

But he was hoping that maybe tonight he could show her it isn’t a big deal not was it always a bad thing.

Plus he didn’t want her to think he was horrid at the game, even if she didn’t really care if he was skilled in this area or not.

“Doll, play along please” Jesper pleaded in a low voice, leaning his chin over her shoulder as he placed his latest bet.

Y/n gave him a look when no one was looking their way, before her eyes once again analyzed the room for threats.

“Y/n/n, they’re going to know I’m up to something if we don’t “ Jesper whispered with a sigh as he examined his hand.

“I thought you didn’t recognize anyone Jesper” y/n asked with clear irritation in her tone despite the way she leaned into him to speak without anyone hearing.

“I didn’t, until now” Jesper said tapping her left arm softly before stroking it to remove any suspicions from the other patrons over his movements.

After a few moments of bickering between some of the other gamblers playing at their table, y/n looked slyly over to her left, flipping her hair flirtatiously as a mask for her real intentions.

As she snuggled into his body, her lips against his ear, hair covering her lips from view, she asked, “tall, white guy in stripes?”

Jesper bent his head in a sly nod as he smirked when a patron began watching him and y/n closely.

“Should we leave?” She asked, hand on his chest as she lifted her head and looked around the room as if bored.

“No doll, let’s just enjoy our date, hmm?” He asked, his tone as he said ‘date’ emphasizing his point.

Jesper knew this person in stripes to be Mr. Callaghan.

Mr. Callaghan knew Jesper and of his gambling troubles and it wasn’t good news if he was here.

However, Jesper figured if she could keep up their cover and make it seem like they were on a date, he wouldn’t find it questionable.

After all, the couple did have some nights she’d join him for a round or two, so it wouldn’t be too unusual.

The worker at their current table shoved the round’s winnings towards the undercover crows as soon as it was deemed Jesper won the round.

“Yes!” Jesper smirked, kissing her cheek, “what did I tell you doll?”.

Playing her part and loving the grin that formed on his face she smiled and cupped his face, “fine, you won”.

“Mmm” Jesper smirked smugly, “always do”.

“So not true” y/n teased, shaking her head softly.

“You do know who I came in here with, right?” He winked, “like I said, I always win”.

Y/n rolled her eyes as her cheeks heated up, shuffling closer to him.

They deliberately made their way to the lead table, trying to take enough time to not look suspicious.

But they also couldn’t take too long as y/n was certain Jesper’s luck would surely run out soon.

She hadn’t seen him this lucky in his wining streak before.

And while she was happy for him, especially as he seemed even more confident than normal, she knew it would take just one wrong overly wagered bet to make things go terribly wrong.

In order to earn a spot at the main table and be considered for the chest (and the similarly placed higher value winnings), the couple had to wage some large bets.

And while they’d been lucky so far, the luck was only making Jesper even more cocky and blind to the risk.

The wagers he was placing were now not only enough to keep them going to their goal, but were well above that for no reason other than Jesper needing that rush.

“Jes, honey” y/n softly spoke, rubbing his hand as he went to double his wager.

“Yes darling?” Jesper asked, kissing the bare skin between her collarbone and neck.

As y/n saw some eyes on her, she put on the facial expressions of an irritated girlfriend, giving Jesper a look with her eyes so he knew it wasn’t genuine.

“Can’t we just go Jesper?” Y/n wined, a dramatic pout on her face as she dragged her hand down his chest.

Jesper suppressed a smirk, not having any problem with her ruse if it meant her hands stayed on him.

Yet, he knew what she was doing, also having seen the other patron watching them closely.

Jesper felt a bit on edge, uncertain if they were scrutinizing their ruse or worse, checking y/n out.

As the man’s eyes glanced up and down y/n’s body as she sat on Jesper’s lap, Jesper restrained from laying his hands on his pistols and guiding his girl home.

Giving the man a warning glance before smirking and kissing y/n’s cheek, Jesper responded, “we will soon love, gotta win you that chest you wanted first, hmm?”

Y/n batted her eyes and nodded, “really? You can win it for me?”

Jesper grinned at her dramatic statement but also took it as a true challenge, “for you, of course“.

Jesper’s attention was drawn back to the other guy when he groaned and commented that Jesper needed to place his bet already.

Jesper smirked and slid some kruge across the table as he moved y/n to his other leg away from the guy.

“Jes, I can’t see the back office from this angle” y/n whispered, dipping her head into his neck.

Jesper hummed, squeezing her hip, “I know, but I don’t like you near him with the way he had his eyes on you”.

Y/n looked up from his shoulder to see what he was referring to; instantly making awkward eye contact with the man in question.

Swallowing thickly, she gave the man a look she hoped showed her lack of interest before turning back to Jesper.

“Where’s the chest?” Jesper asked, resting his hand on y/n’s small back as they stood at the table.

“When you’re ready to cash out, you’ll get it” the handler said, waving to his left; the direction where another worker had moved the chest.

“That’s not how this works” Jesper argued, starting to sense something was off.

“Look man you don’t want to have to carry it around all night “ the employee pushed.

Y/n rubbed Jesper’s arm as she stared at the man, “oh don’t worry! He can still play, I can carry it”.

Jesper fought back a grin and smirked, “as my lady stated, she can hold it until we leave”.

“That won’t be necessary. What, do you not trust us or something?” The man asked, staring at Jesper with a taunting gaze.

“I could give you just about a thousand reasons why that would be reasonable” Jesper remarked, moving his arm from behind y/n to her front.

The man looked Jesper up and down, “that is rich coming from you”.

Before Jesper could respond or y/n could react, the man continued, “the boss needs to record it for the books. You’ll get your winnings soon, why don’t you stay and play a few more rounds?”.

Jesper glanced over at y/n who sighed loudly, “it’s fine. We can wait a bit babe, as long as it doesn’t come back all scratched up”.

The man chuckled, “course not, no damage will be done to your pretty chest darling”

Y/N’s hand twitched against her leg, her fingers brushing Jesper’s thigh briefly as she restrained her disgust.

Jesper sent a harsh glare at the man and guided y/n away.

Jesper huffed as he walked back to the table.

“Play a few more rounds, I’ll find the chest” y/n whispered while no one was nearby.

Jesper raised an eyebrow at her, “says the one who didn’t want me to play tonight”.

Rolling her eyes, she sighed, “you got us into this, but now it’s hidden. Might be back to plan A of just stealing it. But we have to know where it is to do that. Three rounds max though”.

Jesper nodded, rubbing her back, “agreed. I am sorry doll”.

Y/n smiled at him, “it’s fine Jes, but be conservative on these rounds Hmm? Don’t need to go home short handed tonight”.

Jesper understood her message, not only should he do smaller bets, but he should also drag out the rounds by contemplating his betting decisions.

Partially because it meant less chances for him to lose his winnings, but also because he needed to make it seem like he had been trying to leave before he lost money rather than just because they’d earned the chest and were therefore done.

Y/n waited with Jesper for another few rounds, sipping on very watered down drinks.

Once the staff were back to ignoring her and Jesper, she stood.

“Where are you going hun?” Jesper covered.

“I need to pee” y/n said, pretending to as if she wanted to whisper but was too drunk to do so.

Jesper chuckled and nodded, squeezing her hand, “don’t be long”.

Y/n squeezed his hand back before moving through the crowd.

Y/n was just about to check if the next closed door in the long dingy hallway was locked when she heard voices.

She’d checked at least five rooms which were all useless, but no one had been present in them.

Y/n froze and leaned against the wall next to the door to keep steady so she wouldn’t accidentally make a sound but could still hear.

“He’s never this lucky” she heard someone remark.

“I don’t care. You weren’t to let anyone else play for it, Bracken!” The other voice barked.

Y/n felt a sinking feeling in her gut, it had to be about the chest.

This room was one of only three rooms left in her search of the club where she’d seen the chest be moved to.

Did they know what was in the chest?

Is that why they weren’t supposed to be waging the chest?

How did it get thrown in as part of the den’s possible winnings then anyways?

As she heard more arguing and feet shuffling closer, she glanced around before sliding back down the hall and through the bathroom door.

She took a moment to compose herself, feeling her hidden leg belt holding her small blade.

It was better than nothing, but far less ideal than what she normally liked to have on her.

But Kaz was insistent that this was to be an auction and even in Ketterdamn women were expected to wear dresses at such events.

Y/n was just glad she had brought a hair tie, having snuck it in by placing it inside her heel.

It was uncomfortable to walk in, but it meant her hair could be out of her way should things go sideways.

Taking it out, she tied up her hair and swiftly made her way back to her boyfriend.

Chest or no chest, the staff were getting suspicious and the couple would be wise to leave soon.

Meanwhile, Jesper had finished his third round and began panicking that she wasn’t back.

He did another round to distract himself and focus on trusting that she’d be able to handle herself.

“Saints, that girl really is your good luck huh? You suck without her” His opponent asked mockingly as Jesper lost yet another hand.

Normally, he’d be offended or at least give some sarcastically witty retort but his kind was on her absence.

She should’ve been back by now.

Jesper looked up and saw she was empty handed as she gave him a look that communicated she didn’t get the chest.

But he couldn’t have cared less, he was just glad she was okay.

He majorly regretted having suggested they stay instead of just telling Kaz the chest wasn’t up for auction.

Regardless that she hadn’t found anything and seemed okay, Jesper intended to keep her close to him now.

“What did I miss?” Y/n asked, adjusting her dress as she sat down.

“Nothing love” Jesper sighed, biting his lip.

The other guy scoffed and laughed, “you’ll see, he’s about to lose again”

Y/n glanced at Jesper who just shook his head, setting another kruge down to increase his bet.

“Something is up!” The man shouted, slamming his hands on the table when he lost.

“Woah” y/n giggled, playing her roll of ignorant girlfriend “you okay over there?”

The man’s nostrils flared as he growled, “hey! Security, it’s her!”

Jesper promptly stood, pulling y/n behind him.

She no longer had to pretend she was confused.

She felt like a lost and pathetically naive girl in that moment.

A large crowd formed around their table as her boyfriend shielded her, one hand on her and the other on one of his pistols that he was no longer concealing; his fingers twitching to pull them from their holsters.

She was too busy measuring the threats around them to listen to the argument, letting Jesper focus on that part.

But she knew from his tone Jesper wasn’t pleased, “not going to happen”.

“Look, she’s pretending to be scared and confused! Such a sneaky little bi-“ the gambler argued angrily as he moved closer.

Jesper pulled his pistol out within a split second, it now being positioned at the man as the den’s security freed their weapons in response.

The man stopped mid curse and smirked “see how defensive? He’s protecting his secret stash”.

“You’re done talking about her” Jesper remarked, his empty hand still on y/n as he moved her to a slightly more guarded spot behind him.

“Stash?” Y/n questioned, shaking her head.

“The innocent doe eyes thing isn’t going to work sweetheart “ the man remarked.

Jesper’s grip on his pistol tightened but he let his eyes flicker to his girlfriend’s hand that she’d rested on his hip when the scene first started.

Jesper felt horrible.

He’d gotten them into this situation.

He was the reason why there were not only men crowding them but armed men.

Not to mention, it was his reputation of bad luck that had this man doubting Jesper’s sudden string of good luck tonight.

“Leave her out of this. If you think I’m cheating take it up with me, not her” Jesper stated sharply.

Y/n glanced at the back of his head before back to the others and stepping sideways as she came to understand what was happening.

Jesper’s eyes shot to her in panic and disappointment, a firm whisper, “y/n/n”.

Y/n waved an arm down her body, “you think I’m concealing cards on me?”

Only one single man was decent enough to look embarrassed as she pointed out the fact her dress didn’t cover much; and therefore there weren’t many hiding spots.

“I mean, there’s not many places I could,” she chuckled, “but feel free to look”.

Jesper stepped closer to her, uncertain what she was doing.

The guy who’d been eyeing her earlier, smugly moved forward far too eagerly.

“With your eyes, not your hands” she demanded holding a hand up to stop the man.

Jesper glared at the man, his second pistol out and now pointed at the men as he clenched his jaw.

One guard looked her over, “how do we know you’re not hiding cards were your skin is covered?”

“Where?” She asked, hands running down her dress everywhere but the area of her knife belt, “there’s not even any pockets or sleeves”.

“You know where” the guard smirked, explicitly eyeing her breasts.

Jesper clicked his revolvers as he stepped closer with a low growl deep in his throat.

“Enough, we’ll just get out of your hair then. Let’s just cash out and leave , Jesper. “ y/n said, knowing Jesper was at his end.

He kept staring at the men for a little longer but nodded his head once.

He lowered his pistols at the same time the security did, but didn’t place them back in their holsters until after the others had put theirs away.

Not that it would matter, y/n knew very well that Jesper would easily be able to pull his guns back out long before the others could even attempt to raise theirs.

An obese man tossed a bag of their winnings towards the couple and y/n caught it.

Jesper placed his hand on her back and gently lead them to the door.

“My chest” y/n reminded them, turning around and stopping their exit.

Jesper wanted to groan.

Yes, they needed the chest.

But, he’d have found someway to make it up somehow.

Just not now, not when the staff were already on edge and eyeing y/n.

“Wouldn’t you rather have the money?” The man asked , “maybe your man will get you something nice with it”.

“My girl wants the chest” Jesper argued, “so, where’s the chest?”

“The chest is not for sale” some random person spoke loudly.

“That’s fine because we’re not buying it” Jesper smirked.

Y/n caught a glimpse of the chest next to the man who’d recently spoken up.

She nodded her head his direction and Jesper raised an eyebrow.

Looking back at the house boss, Jesper gave him a questioning gesture.

The unknown man pushed the chest against the ground, the box scrapping against the bottom of the bar.

Y/n and Jesper shared a moment of eye contact before all hell broke loose.

Y/n unsheathed her blade as Jesper flipped his pistols around on their way up to his hands.

The guards weren’t too far behind and soon the couple were separated.

Jesper wasn’t even watching where he was pointing his guns, his eyes following his girl as she fluently leaped between tables as she fought off some of the guards while trying to get closer to the chest.

He was glad she wasn’t only skilled at avoiding gunshots, but also that the guards were poorly equipped.

Most had a few, dirty but sharp blades, but few had anything of larger concern.

And for those that did, Jesper guarded her from them.

As someone tried to grab his left pistol, Jesper faced him and snapped the barrel upwards against the guys’ hand, using the man’s stumbled response to send him to the floor. Jesper hit the man’s head with the butt of his gun on his way down; knocking him out.

Jesper’s eyes had just located y/n when she hissed loudly, his wide eyes seeing red pour down her exposed leg; the color visible even under the minimal glow of the club.

Even though she kept fighting her way to the chest, Jesper rang shots out faster as he rushed towards her.

As he shot the man who had stabbed her, y/n looked over at him and gave him a weak cocky smile.

Jesper could see the strain through it and his heart dropped.

She looked away and clumsily jumped off the bar counter and towards the man and his chest.

“Y/n!” Jesper called, pleading her to stop.

“I believe that’s ours” she said to the man, ignoring Jesper.

“Psycho little -“ a guard said just before y/n used her good leg to swipe his legs out from under him and knock him down.

Jesper kept one gun pointed at the guards before her who were holding her at gunpoint.

His other was turned sideways to hit the man charging at him from across the room.

Y/N’s sharp inhale rang through the air, making Jesper’s eyes freeze for a moment in fear.

But as he turned to her, he saw her nearly on the floor.

None of the guards he’d pointed his gun at had even moved.

What happened?!

Y/n pressed a shaky hand on the dingy floor to catch herself, groaning as her wrist screamed at her.

The man she’d knocked down had returned the favor by tugging her dress’s edge downwards, making her land on the floor in front of him.

She looked down and faintly made out the dull knife the guard had in his grip just as he dug it into the already broken skin.

Y/n cursed and broke the guy’s wrist as she moved her blade to his neck.

She heard the men above her moving in response and she could envision all their guns directed downwards at her.

But, she couldn’t do anything about that.

At this one she had pinned would pay for the scar he likely was causing.

She knew Jesper was there, and she hoped he’d seen what was going on.

But, she knew he had countless other threats surrounding him in the packed bar, so she wasn’t certain if he had.

She flinched and squeezed her eyes shut as she heard the familiar clicking of guns and braced for their shots.

As gunfire rang out through the now-stuffy air, y/n felt the man pull his knife out of her leg, going back for another strike.

She pressed her blade to his throat tightly, knowing she had enough pressure to subdue him as she heard him start to squirm.

Upon hearing bodies hit the floor next to her, y/n peeled her eyes open and saw Jesper had wounded each man.

Jesper was beside her, kicking the guns away from the men as he bent down to lift her up.

“Hang on love” Jesper huffed, one hand around her waist as he hoisted her back to a standing position.

He positioned his other hand so it was pointing his pistol toward anyone who dared to try and come forward.

He didn’t want to have to shoot anyone else but he would willingly shoot-to-kill every person in the bar if that’s what it took to get his girl out and he wanted them to know that.

Y/n mumbled something unintelligible as she pressed her palm to her wound while trying to brace herself on Jesper.

Jesper fought to keep his sorrowful and pained eyes off her leg as he helped her walk out of the bar.

“Wait” she gasped, making him freeze as his wide eyes snapped to her face.

“T-the.. Ches-“ she groaned, eyes squinting in pain.

Jesper huffed in irritation but leaned her on the counter as he rushed back to the chest, hurriedly grabbing it and then her hand, “now come on”.

Once they’d ventured down the narrow side-street alleys far enough to feel somewhat less at risk, she slowed her pace as she moved to rest against the wall.

Jesper fell to his knees before her as she pressed her back against the cold mossy bricks, sliding down until her butt hit the ground.

He finally let his troubled eyes examine her leg, his teeth grinding as they did.

“Shit” he sighed, looking around for water to clear the wound so he could see it better, “love, fuck”.

Y/n chuckled faintly, rolling her head side to side as the back of it rested against the bricks, “it hurts like the bitch they said I am, but I’ll be fine”

Jesper shook his head, tears flooding his vision as he faced her, using his hand to wipe the blood away since there were no liquids around.

“Fuck, Jesp-“ she moaned, pushing her fist to her mouth to keep quiet.

He glanced up at her with remorse as he wiped some sweat beads from her forehead with his other hand.

Jesper stared back down at her leg, trying to problem solve, “I know baby, I’m so sorry. Shit I- I don’t. Okay so-“.

Y/n reached out and tenderly stroked his face, making him let out a choked sob, “Jesper, honey,-“.

He shook his head firmly, pulling the bottom section of torn material from her dress and pressing it against her wound.

She grimaced but nodded as his eyes looked into hers, “let’s go”.

Jesper gave her a thankful smile at how strong she was being despite their situation.

By the time they made it back, y/n was dragging her leg so much that Jesper was nearly carrying her.

In fact, he wished he was, but her stubbornness and pride got in the way.

Ironic, right?

He used his free hand to throw open the doors, not caring that they slammed against the wall loudly.

He was glad it helped announce their entrance, his focus on finding Nina.

“I-it- just a scratch Jes” y/n tried to comfort, gripping the material of his shirt.

He knew the wound wasn’t life threatening but he hated that there was one at all.

She shouldn’t have been hurt.

He shouldn’t have gotten her hurt.

As Nina finished up the stitching on y/n’s leg, y/n continued drawing shapes on Jesper’s palm.

He hadn’t left her side from the moment it happened, not even when Kaz tried to pull him out so they could talk.

He’d face Kaz’s wrath later even if delaying it only made him angrier.

He wasn’t ready to leave her side.

Kaz had taken the chest to hide it wherever and hadn’t returned since.

Nina had already fixed the pain and bleeding and was just stitching up the skin to aid in her healing.

“Twice daily, rinse between applications” Nina stated, facing Jesper as she handed him a jar.

“What is that?” Y/n asked, reaching for his other hand.

“It’ll keep it clean and fix the infection” Nina said softly.

“Infection?” Jesper asked, the way his head was still hung and the pain and guilt in his voice made y/n frown.

“Whatever Saints-forsaken dagger was used wasn’t exactly clean, nor is Ketterdamn” Nina explained.

Jesper nodded, turning the jar over in his hand as he scrutinized the material.

Y/n gave Nina a pleading look to which her friend smiled in understanding.

“But, she’ll be fine, you got her out” Nina said, “she’s lucky you were there, it could’ve been worse”.

Jesper began to argue but y/n squeezed his hand to stop him.

Nina gave them both a kind smile before she stepped out.

They both called out a thank you to Nina before y/n tilted Jesper’s head up so she could his pewter-green eyes she adored.

He took a shaky breath, setting the jar beside her as he cupped her face with his hands, “I’m so sorry y/n, if-“.

“Please stop Jes, it’s not your fault “ she sighed.

“Doll, -“ Jesper argued softly as a tear rolled down his cheek.

“Jesper!” Kaz’s booming voice called out the sound forced into the room before the man himself did.

“Ka-“ y/n began defensively.

Jesper shook his head at her, willing to accept his punishment.

“I wasn’t speaking to you, was I?” Kaz snapped, sending her a harsh stare.

But y/n noticed the way a grimace formed as his eyes fell to her patched leg.

It lasted only a split second before his anger returned and he looked at Jesper.

“I know” Jesper admitted, not moving his eyes from his girlfriend’s leg.

“Then look at me when-“ Kaz demanded.

“Look at you?!” Jesper scoffed shaking his head, “y/n’s hurt because of me, I’m not taking my eyes off her until she’s healed”.

Y/n pouted as she sighed, unsure how to help him.

“You two were to get the chest. That’s it! Then you come back bloody” Kaz stated looking at y/n.

To Jesper, he said, “and you gambled with the kruge I gave you I said to only use to purchase the chest!”

Jesper nodded, looking intently into y/n’s eyes, “I should’ve listened. We should’ve left when y/n suggested”

“Aye! Brekker, we got the chest did we not?” Y/n smirked, stretching her leg on the bed.

“And came back inoperable for at least a week” Kaz griped.

“At least two” Jesper corrected firmly.

Kaz raised an eyebrow at him, having spoken to Nina himself moments ago.

“Jes,” y/n shushed, “not helping. And Nina said one week”.

Looking back her way, Jesper gave her a pleading look, “two”.

Kaz wanted to keep criticizing them Jesper but even as mad as he was at the behavior, after watching the way Jesper looked at y/n, Kaz could tell he wasn’t going to be making that mistake ever again.

Y/n played with Jesper’s rings as he held her torso to his side.

“It’s not your fault” she reiterated for the hundredth time.

Jesper let out a loud sigh, watching her fingers spin the rings he donned.

“You had said we should leave. I should’ve listened” he admitted.

The scene had been playing over in his mind on a loop.

“You had an idea Jesper, and it would’ve worked if things hadn’t changed twice on their end” y/n said encouragingly.

Jesper stayed silent as he wished he could take her place.

He deserved to be the one with a gash in their leg not her.

“Jes, my beautiful baby boy, Kaz’s intel was wrong. You tried to adjust so we could still accomplish the task. You had no way of knowing they’d change things again on us” she pointed out, lifting his knuckles to her soft lips.

It was true.

Inej had just left y/n’s room after informing them that the auction had been cancelled moments before they’d arrived.

Allegedly because the seller argued for a better price for which to sell it to the auctioneer.

Then, the seller made a deal to wager the chest instead, in a bet he wagered against the auctioneer.

Through all of that, Jesper’s plan would’ve worked.

However, unbeknownst to them, the auctioneer/gambling den’s leader had staged one of their own employees at the tables to win it.

But, the seller too had arranged a ploy, intending for the box to be won by his true buyer.

Evidently whatever was in this box was not something one could legally sell or even auction off.

Not that Ketterdamn much less the bare ever stuck to the laws or legalities.

But, Inej found out the intended buyer was a high ranking merchant and therefore had to make it seem they’d stumbled upon the chest on a routine night of high stakes gambling in some abandoned part of the barrel.

“Doesn’t matter” Jesper mumbled.

“Jesper Fahey, come on now” y/n pouted.

“I let my ego get in the way and you- you’re hurt becau-“ Jesper rambled.

“Don’t you dare finish that Jesper “ Y/n warned, holding his hand tightly as she kissed his knuckles again.

“Y/n, just…please, you don’t know the underlying motive I had” Jesper remorsefully whispered.

“Which was?” She asked, letting him explain in hopes he’d feel better after.

“I wanted to impress you- and Saint’s! I just.., like I said, my ego won and I wasn’t thinking as clearly as I should’ve been. I should’ve been more focused on our safety. Your safety. But instead I was thinking about showing off to try and impress you. I’m so sorry y/n, I-“ Jesper mumbled, voice strained.

She pushed her tailbone into the mattress beside him as she leaned to sit up without moving her leg.

Y/n turned to look at him as he copied her movements with a mixture of confusion, fear, and sadness swimming in his normally comforting eyes.

She shook her head vehemently, grabbing his hands in hers.

“Jesper Llewellyn Fahey” she hummed and shook her head with a smile on her lips, “you, my dear, do not need to try to impress me. You already impress me on a daily basis. Okay? You’ve got nothing you need to prove; certainly not to me. I need you to know that”.

Jesper let a few tears trail down his cheeks, hitting her thumbs until she tenderly wiped them off before kissing both of his cheeks.

“I really am so terribly sor-“ Jesper began again, his arms locking behind her to hold her to him.

“Fahey, if you don’t stop apologizing I swear I will hide your ever so precious pistols somewhere in Kaz’s office” y/n threatened.

Jesper chuckled into her hair, kissing her ear softly.

“I like that sound” she hummed, snuggling into him, “are you okay now? This is over, hmm?”

“Two weeks” he spoke, playing with her hair.

“Ugh” she complained, “fine but only if you’re keeping me company during those two boring ass weeks”.

Jesper tucked her head deeper into his shoulder, as he held her, listening to her breathing to soothe any remaining negative emotions.

“Darling, I’m never leaving your side again” Jesper threatened sweetly, closing his eyes.

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#jesper fahey fluff #jesper fahey x y/n #jesper fahey angst #jesper fahey hurt-comfort #jesper fahey x you #jesper fahey #jes #jes fahey #soc #soc fluff #soc jesper #soc fahey #soc jesper fahey #soc angst #sab tv show #sab jesper fahey #jesper fahey x reader #six of crows jesper #jesper fahey x reader fluff #jesper fahey x reader angst #jesper fahey imagine #six of crows imagines #six of crows x reader #six of crows duology #six of crows #six of crows fluff #six of crows angst #six of crows reader #original post #sab

[random-writer-23]

The pearl Guns (Jesper x F Reader)

A/N: Hello lovelies! Welcome to the first one-shot I'm publishing on this blog, this one was written pretty recently so it's probably going to be much better than the others I'll be posting on here of my past writing, but when I get to publishing more new stuff it'll hopefully be decent as well. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it, and any comments, likes, shares, and reblogs are appreciated! Happy reading! Word count: 3131 Requested: No Warnings: not really, just the usual Jesper flirting and just sexual tension but nothing other than that.

As a member of ketterdams socially elite, I was expected to behave like a perfect lady at all times of the day, whether it was at a dinner party hosted by my father, a traveling conference my father forced me to attend, art shows, or whatever else my father expected of me. My father was one of the biggest and richest merchants in the city and as a result, I being his one and only daughter had practically no say in my life. I had to be the perfect daughter in order to preserve his reputation. Which is why I am currently getting ready for a large dinner party my father is hosting.

"is it still too loose (y/n)?" My maid Magaret asked, referring to the corset backing of the dress I was wearing.

"Oh um, just a little tighter Margaret" I replied, feeling the tug of the ribbon on my back tightening my corset. "that's good" I responded when I felt the dress tight enough to support me. She tied it at the back and stepped away towards my vanity mirror where she started preparing to do my hair. I looked in the full-body mirror at the dress. It was an (f/c) dress that stretched all the way to my ankles. I gave a small spin while Margaret nodded her head approvingly.

"Alright, dear now sit down so I can do your hair" Margaret moved me to sit in front of the mirror and grabbed my hairbrush, beginning to brush my hair. Once she was done she patted my shoulder and I turned around so she could do my makeup. Once she finished she patted my shoulder and I stood up while she cleaned up my vanity.

"thank you, Margaret," I said as she helped me into my shoes.

"Of course dearie" she replied brushing my dress out straight and giving me a smile as she left the room. Margaret has been my maid since the day I was born, cleaning my room, feeding me, reading me stories before bed, taking me to school, and taking care of me when I was sick. She was more like a parent to me than my actual father is. After my mother passed he distanced himself from me. I always assumed it was because I am the spitting image of her. I took one last look at myself in my mirror, I looked like the ideal image of a perfectly well-behaved daughter, all that was left to do was to play the part. I exited my room and headed downstairs to stand next to my father as he welcomed people into the house.

"Please behave tonight (y/n)" My father whispered with an exasperated sigh, placing a stern hand on my shoulder. Which to others might have looked like a gesture of comfort, but I knew it was an order. I stood up straight smiling and offering to take our guest's coats making small talk with the ladies as my dad spoke to the merchants, directing them to a conference room where the merchant council was going to meet. While those not attending the meeting were directed to the living room to talk amongst themselves and enjoy the rest of the party. After the rest of the merchant council had arrived my father gave my shoulder a squeeze and walked off toward the conference room to participate in the council meeting. I was left to my own devices to wander around and keep the guests occupied and wanting for nothing. I wandered into the living room where everyone was chatting with each other. The band playing their music softly in the background. I smiled while chatting with some of the guests before, excusing myself to get a drink. I poured myself a cup of water refusing to let one of the servants do it for me and then exited the room squeezing past the waiters who were getting ready to serve trays of appetizers to the guests since the actual food wouldn't be served until after the council meeting ended. Smiling and nodded through the halls of people making small talk and giving hugs until I finally made it outside. Giving a nod of acknowledgment to the guards posted at the door, who were no doubt ordered by my father to keep a close watch on me. Once I finally made it outside I took a deep breath and moved myself past the few guests who were lingering and chatting in the garden, toward my favorite spot. I sighed walking past the decorative rows of rose bushes, kicking a small rock along the path. The gazebo sat upon the highest spot in the garden, shining in the moonlight and overlooking the bay. Lifting my skirt I stepped gently over a puddle of mud and onto the hard floor of the gazebo. I looked around, finally out of view of the guards stationed at the door.

"man I hate these dinners," I said to no one, in particular, letting out a huff, I finished my drink and placed the empty cup on the gazebo railing.

"You and me both beautiful" A man's voice replied and I spun around to see where the voice came from.

"And who are you?" I asked backing up and holding the skirt of my dress up, in case I had to make a run for it. The man gave me a weird look before gesturing to his clothes.

"I thought it was a bit obvious that I'm a guard, love" He laughed, and against my better judgment I laughed as well.

"well, whose guard are you?" I asked calming down my giggles, "cause you can't be one of my father's I would have seen you around here before." I watched his eyes widen for a second before he composed his features and spoke.

"You're (l/n)'sF daughter?" He asked and I nodded in response letting go of the hold I had on my skirt and leaning up against the railing of the gazebo. The stranger's presence made me oddly relaxed. "how could someone as ugly as him make someone as pretty as you" He flirted with a wink and I blushed looking away from him.

"Why thank you" I giggled bringing my hand up to my face to hide my blush.

"and if you must know, I'm only a temporary hire. First time working here, brought in for the party" He explained and I nodded along. It wasn't unusual for my father to bring in members of the stadwatch for events and parties he put on. More security means fewer problems he always said.

"I see, well that explains why I haven't seen you around" I replied with a smile, "so you're a stadwatch guard I presume?" I asked moving away from the railing to sit on one of the gazebo benches.

"you could say that" He moved from the entrance of the gazebo to lean against the railing across from me, as he moved I snuck a glance at the guns holstered to his side.

"so if you're a guard, why aren't you, y'know guarding things?" I asked with a small smile.

"I am, I'm guarding you, the most important guest at the party" He declared "you don't know what kind of unsavory characters are lurking in your gardens" He lowered his voice and looked around animatedly. Making me laugh.

"I should have assumed my father would send a guard to tail me" I sighed dramatically before looking at the stranger slyly, "I just didn't know he'd be so handsome" I giggled, as a surprised look crossed the guard's face, he reached up scratching the back of his neck shyly.

"I don't think I can take so much flattery from such an angel" He smiled and fanned himself dramatically, which made me laugh again. We fell into a short silence as our laughter died down.

"if I may ask what kind of guns do you have," I asked partly wondering about his guns, and also just wanting to keep talking to this handsome stranger instead going back to the boring party full of stuffy noble folk and businessmen.

"Oh these?" He moved his coat aside to show off the one holstered on his left hip, and I nodded. He took it out of the holster and moved closer to where I sat, for me to see them. "They're zemeni-made" he explained. "and you see the handle?" he pointed at the handle which had a pearlescent look to them, so I suspected it to be pearl. "it's made of pearl" he confirmed my suspicions.

"That's what I thought it was!" I said excitedly prying my eyes away from the guns to look up at him, to see him already looking at me with a smile. I looked back at his guns quickly, my face heating up again. "what else?" I asked him, and he cleared his throat to continue.

"well they can fire up to 6 shots really quickly one after the other, and as for the type of gun they're revolvers" He held it out to me. "you can hold it if you'd like"

"oh, could I?" I asked positively beaming at the offer.

"of course" He responded with a chuckle, I stood up and took the revolver from him gently, and examined it.

"Now what's that?" I pointed to the middle of the gun where a weird-looking circle sat.

"That's the barrel, it's what holds the bullets" he explained and I nodded. "there's the trigger, that's what you press to shoot it," he said pointing to the trigger. "you wanna try shooting it?" He asked with a sly smile and I nodded excitedly. "alright, let's uhhhh aha" he said his eyes landing on the cup I had placed on the railing and had just about forgotten. He walked over and moved it to the middle of the railing. "Now back up a little" He walked back to me and moved to stand next to me. "that's it, and then since it's already loaded" He held my wrist gently and fixed how I was holding the gun "that's better, we're going to pull this right here to cock the gun, and now keep your finger off the trigger there, we're gonna aim first." He moved from my side to behind me and let go of my wrist moving his hand up my arm and stopping at my elbow. I shuddered as a chill ran up my spine "now straighten your arm, love" He said pushing my arm straight "that's it" I felt the hand not holding my arm come to rest on my hip. My breath hitched as my face flushed, and I could feel my heartbeat quicken when he spoke, I prayed he couldn't hear how loud it was. "Now point it straight ahead" he moved my arm so it was pointing directly at the cup on the railing. "and close one eye and look down at the gun, is it pointing at the cup?" He asked. I didn't really trust myself to speak so I nodded. "all right now when you're ready, fix your stance 'cause there's going to be a little recoil and I don't want you to fall. Widen your feet" I fixed my stance like he said, "there you go, now bring your finger to the trigger, don't pull yet" He shifted, his hand moving from my elbow back to my hand, fitting it snuggly in his, placing his finger over mine on the trigger. "you ready?" he asked.

"yeah, ready" I responded, trying desperately to control my racing heart. I felt him push my finger down on the trigger and heard a loud bang as the bullet shot out of the gun and hit the cup on the railing shattering it to pieces. I grinned as I realized I hit it, letting out a stream of giggles in my excitement. "I hit it!" I squealed moving out of his hold to jump around in excitement.

"I knew you would," he replied, and my smile faded slightly at the realization I couldn't feel his warmth anymore. "a little more practice and you'll probably be better than me" he added with a smile and I chuckled, looking at the gun in my hand I regretfully gave it back, and he tucked it away, back in his holster. I watched his movements carefully until I heard the distant sound of footsteps coming hurriedly in our direction.

"Oh no that'll be the other guards" I looked at him worriedly, "they probably heard the sound!" I said my voice rising in panic. "they're going to tell my father!" I whispered in horror mainly to myself.

"hey, hey don't worry, just uh... follow my lead," He said with a sly smile. I nodded turning to face the approaching guards who were now within eyesight.

"What's going on over here, we heard a gunshot. are you alright miss (l/n)" The taller guard asked us, holding his hand on his gun warily.

"That's my fault, I was trying to entertain miss (l/n) while watching over her" the stranger responded to him, as he stood at attention. I nodded my agreement.

"oh yes, my father instructed him to watch me, and he saw me out here alone. It's not his fault, I was curious about his guns, and asked if I could shoot one" I told the guards, and they nodded along.

"well alright miss (l/n), as long as there's no trouble we should be returning to our posts" the shorter one replied and they both gave me a short bow as I dismissed them. Once they were out of sight the man and I burst into a fit of giggles.

"that was close!" I laughed covering my mouth with my hand as I did.

"what do you mean you were a natural!" he exclaimed as our laughter died down, and we descended into a nice silence. I looked down at my feet clasping my hands in front of me as he cleared his throat. I looked back up at him for a moment meeting his eyes, as I smiled.

"oh I um, I never got your name," I said quietly, trying not to disturb the moment.

"well, you never asked for it love" He responded his face breaking out into a smile as he took a step closer to me.

"I'm asking now" I challenged, a matching smile appearing across my face, only then realizing how close we were.

"well then, Love my name is-" He was inturrupted by the grating voice of my father, shattering the calm between the man and I.

"(y/n)" I heard his voice, it sounded far off but I knew if I didn't go now it would get closer as he looked for me.

"I'm sorry, you were saying? your name." I apologized on behalf of my father and tried to resume conversation with the guard.

"next time love," The guard said with a sly smile, taking my hand and pressing a slow kiss to the top. "you best be off" he let go of my hand and the warmth of his kiss stayed with me as he left the gazebo. My eyes trailed him as he left and I went to find my father before he got any angrier than he probably was.

Dinner was served by the time I made it back to the house, and my father gave me a stern look that meant we'd be having a discussion later. I ate my dinner in silence, sitting next to my father, listening to the chatter of guests as they all spoke with one another.

It wasn't until late in the night when we bid the last guests a good night as they left the house, and my father turned on me.

"the guards posted at the garden door informed me of your little gunslinging," he said his voice level and steady. "what were you doing? hmm?" He asked sternly.

"I went outside for some fresh air and then started talking to one of the members of the stadwatch you brought in for tonight's party. The one you instructed to tail me tonight" I explained wringing my fingers as I avoided eye contact with him.

"What are you talking about? I didn't send anyone to watch you tonight, and I didn't bring in any extra members of the stadwatch for tonight's party" He said tired of this conversation already.

I looked at him shocked "but, the guard..." I trailed off at the look my father gave me, and he sighed pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes.

"(y/n), it's been a long night, we'll continue this conversation another day, just go to your room" He demanded softly.

"but i- yes father" I responded not feeling up to protest. I made my way up the stairs and stopped at the top. "goodnight father" I said quietly.

"goodnight (y/)- " He hesitated cutting himself off in the middle of my name before speaking again. "goodnight (n/n)" he said calling me by the affectionate nickname he used to when I was small. My eyes watered as I turned away from him and continued down the hall to my room. He hasn't called me that since before my mom passed.

I laid in bed that night staring at my ceiling long after Margaret had left after helping me out of my formal dinner wear. Thinking thoughts about the stranger and why he would have lied to me, thoughts about his lies merged into thoughts of how gentle he was, and how warm his hands felt on my arms and hip. Those thoughts slowly turned into other thoughts, fantasizing about the stranger in ways that were most definitely not ladylike. Finally falling asleep to the comforting thought of when I would possibly see him again.

--Time skip--

The answer to that would be never. I looked for him at the next party my father hosted, and the next one, and the next one. But he was never to be seen at any of them. I asked stadwatch guards I met about the boy with the pearl revolvers and none of them knew. Eventually, my memory of the stranger grew faint. I couldn't remember the details of his face or the sound of his voice, but no matter how fuzzy the memory of my moment with the stranger got the warmth of the kiss he placed on my hand that night stayed with me forever.

~Fin~

QOTD: Who's your favourite crow?

Join my discord server: https://discord.gg/9bwRmtXCuB

AN: so originally this was supposed to be continued and much longer than it is here, but I just felt that it was a nice ending, so I cut out the longer version and ended it like this, however....... I still have the other version of this story, so I'm thinking of posting that version as well as keeping this version up. So let me know what you guys think. But I hope you enjoyed this. 

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[mcntsee]

The real barbie is Y/n.

Y/n’s a doctor, a cop, a scientist, an agent, vet, hero, villain, astronaut, lawyer, spy, criminal, artist, chef, engineer, psychologist, architect, journalist, firefighter, event planner, mechanic, photographer, musician, actor, interior designer, bartender, fashion designer, barista, florist, forensic scientist, flight attendant, profiler, tour guide, translator, etc.

#y/n #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #cod x reader #simon riley x reader #konig x reader #cod x y/n #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x y/n #konig x y/n #harry potter x y/n #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker x y/n #six of crows x reader #jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey x y/n #wylan van eck x reader #fanfiction #fluff #angst #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x y/n #alastor x y/n #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown x y/n #the umbrella academy x reader #five hargreaves x reader #klaus hargreeves x reader

[notelcol]

The Getaway🐦‍⬛

That Kaz x reader hurt/comfort that was voted in by some lovely people❤️

Mildly edited, apologies for mistakes🫶

The wind blew harshly against your body as you ran through Ketterdam with a stolen scroll in your hand. Your felt like you were flying. Grinning, you turned towards the man who ran a step behind you. His face matched yours. A wicked joy had you both feeling more alive than ever. You had just pulled a small heist, now it was your favourite part. The getaway.

A few more turnings through the winding streets and you would be at the switch point. There, you would meet Inej and she would disappear with the loot, while Jesper shoots the men chasing you. That was the plan at least…When you and Kaz finally skidded to a halt at your location, you both looked up at the rooftops for Inej.

“Where is she?” Kaz hissed. You looked back down the road you had come from.

“Where’s the men?” You realised they should have caught up by now. Slow footsteps began to echo, coming from a nearby turning. You whipped your head around to see the man you just stole from. He grinned menacingly before pulling out a gun. Kaz clocked it before you did but before he could even take a step towards you, the shot rang out. The scroll fell from your hand and rolled down the street, towards the shooter.

“I’ll have that back now, thank you.” He said, all too politely. Then, he simply walked away while whistling a jaunty tune.

The shock wore off, as the whistling became quieter. Then came the pain. You held your hand against your stomach, only to be met with a wet warmth. Reality truly hit you when you looked down at your hand and saw the blood. All of a sudden you could feel it trickling down from your stomach until it fell in a pool on the floor. You looked to Kaz for reassurance, only to see him white as a sheet inching towards you terror.

“You need to apply pressure.” He instructed. You complied, but each second you felt as though you were fading. Until, you dropped.

“HEY!” Kaz shouted desperately poking you with his cane. “Stay awake and keep applying pressure. Inej and Jesper will be here, they are just held up.” He hoped they would come. A situation like this is the only time Kaz feels useless.

Your eyes started to roll as your vision became blurry. You tried to keep pressing on your wound but your hands wouldn’t listen to you. As your fingers fell beside you once again, you felt a hard pressure against your stomach. You knew you were delirious when you saw Kaz kneeling at your side, keeping your blood inside your body, allowing you to close your eyes at last. Kaz himself was beginning to feel like he was dreaming too. The last time he had pushed his hair out of his face, your blood on his gloves ran up his arm beneath his sleeve. The wet sensation combined with the coldness of your body under his hands was all too familiar.

Kaz wanted nothing more than to sink his memories forever. But they kept surfacing to matter how hard he tried to focus on you. A scream ripped from his throat as he punched himself in the head, as if trying to evict the distraction of his childhood trauma. His eyes fell upon your face as he told himself this isn’t Jordie. You were still alive, at least you would be as long as he could keep himself together. He pressed more confidently against the wound at he thought of losing you, his partner in crime. He never expected to trust someone enough to call them that. He had his Crows, but never a partner. Not until you. Not since Jordie. A tear fell from his cheek onto yours as he stared down at your paling features.

He barely even noticed Inej’s arrival. It was shortly followed by Jesper’s much louder one.

“Sorry! We got held up by-“ Jesper froze when he saw the scene before him, then released a breath when he saw your chest rising.

“Shit. We need to get them back home.” Jesper jumped straight into action, less cautious to approach Kaz than Inej was. He took over Kaz’ position at your side and picked you up.

You woke up to a deep ache, causing you to groan and roll over. The movement changed the pain to a searing stab.

“FUCKING HELL!!!” You screamed.

“Good morning to you too.” Kaz’ made his presence in the room known to you. He was sat at the side of your bed smirking at you.

“I take it the men who were supposed to be chasing us are why Inej and Jesper were late?” You asked. Kaz answered you with only a nod, leaving you still concerned for your friends. Your rolled your eyes as sat up, this time sure to move slower. It did not help much, still feeling like you were being ripped open. You felt Kaz’ cane press against your chest gently.

“Lay down.” He sternly told you. You looked up at him in defiance but stopped when you saw his eyes. “Please.” His tone was more vulnerable this time, small like a whisper. You allowed his cane to push you back down, not missing the sadness in his eyes as a groan escaped you.

“I’m okay.” You sent him a comforting smile, which he returned.

“So are Inej and Jesper.”

Kaz had been in and out of your room all day in between handling business.

“I just came to say goodnight.” He said, though he seemed as though he was holding back. You decided not to pry, since you did not have the energy to get blood from a stone tonight.

“Goodnight Kaz.” You smiled. He turned to leave, looking almost disappointed. Then out of nowhere, he rushed back in and stopped when he reached your bedside. He looked deep into your eyes. The intensity woke your drowsy mind as your heart skipped a beat. “You are very special to me. Today was…” He trailed off and looked away. You thought he was about to turn around and leave again, but instead he sucked in a deep breath and quickly pressed a kiss to your forehead. As his lips met your skin, he lingered for a second. This was the closest you had ever felt to him. Not because of the physical contact though. It was rare for Kaz let someone see him feel. It felt intimate. But it was over as fast as it began.

“Goodnight.” He said once more, but this time he was breathless and shaking in a mix of fear and something else that he was finally ready to name.

“I love you.” He spoke. Before you could process the interaction, he was gone.

——-

Thank you for reading 🌹

#shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone #kaz #kaz brekker hurt/comfort #kaz x y/n #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker x you #kaz x you #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #kaz x reader #kaz dirtyhands brekker #kaz brekker fluff #kaz brekker angst #kaz hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort #light angst #angst #writing #x reader #fanfic #soc #six of crows #inej gafha #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #grishaverse #grisha

[lady-ashfade]

Hello Darling, I was wondering if I could get Kaz thing were him and reader have know each other for ages and like with Jordie and she is the old person Kaz is kinds ok with touching, so one day when a heist goes wrong and Y/N gets hurt and Kaz is like freaking out thinking she's going to die and stuff and its like super fluffy and and like Y/N heals and Kazoo like doesn't leave her side

If you could do this it would be amazing

I’m right here.

Kaz Brekker x Fem!Reader

Hope I did this okay! Thanks for the request 🌸

Notes: This is short and fluffy. I also can’t do good aid or this type of thing so I hope it’s okay!

Warning: Pain to comfort, a little angst, blood, crying in pain, bad writing for sure, spelling mistakes probably.

The group rushed through the door almost breaking it off the hinges. “Get her upstairs.” Kaz shouted as Matthias held you in his arms, Nina by his side focusing on your heartbeat. Inej went to the kitchen where you kept your towels and collected everything.

You blood stained Matthias shirt and your eyes flutter, a groan or a whimper leaving your lips a few times. As soon as they got to the top floor of your home they rushed to the bedroom. “On the bed.” Nina fixed the pillows and the sheets, then patted the mattress. Matthias nodded his head and put you down carefully and tried not to give your extra pain.

Wylan almost sobbed at the sight of your arm falling and going limp. You knew who he was, who was his father and you never shamed him for it. He loved you and cared deeply, you were his best friend. Wylan turned away and into Jesper arms, who took him into his arms quickly. “Is she going to be okay?” He asked and kaz shot him a glare that he couldn’t see.

“Yes, now everyone out except Inej.” Nina’s hand tugged at your bloody shirt and they all went out quickly. Kaz stood still and looked at you, “Kaz, she’ll be fine.” Inej rushed passed passed him with her arms full and went by Nini. “I’m staying.” They didn’t have time to fight with him, but they knew even if they did he would stay.

They had no choice but pull your shirt off and leaving you in the thin layer on your chest. Kaz hated seeing your face curl into pain as they cleaned the wound. “Jordie” he remembered the small boy with a body underneath him, shaking it as he cried for his brother. He got light headed and sat down in the chair. Was he going to lose you too? Shaking his head at the thought because he wouldn’t allow that.

A scream cut him out of his thoughts, you opening your eyes as the needle pressed into your skin. “Stop! Please.” You cried at the pain in your side. Nina apologized as she teared up and Inej looked up at you guilty. “Kaz!” You looked up at him and he felt his entire body move on its own and he was by your side within seconds. “Make it stop!” You cried.

He took your hand in his and gave it a small squeeze, “You can handle it.” He stated and you shook your head. A whimper came out as the needle went back, “Can’t.” He leaned closer and rubbed circles on your hand. “You can, I’m right here.” You looked back at him and the pain became too much for you to handle, along with the blood that you lost, or the shock you felt.

Kaz watched your eyes fell closed and your hand losing its grip. He panicked and looked back at your chest and saw it go up and down. “I’m right here.” He whispered. Kaz held your hand the whole time and stayed by your side, even when it was all done. He refused to leave your side, if something happened while he was away he couldn’t live with himself.

Everyone came and stayed for a while, he was there. When everyone left to sleep he stayed there, Nina and Matthias stayed in the other room. Days passed and he was still in the room by your side. He hated the feelings of lose as if the old friend visited him again to take someone else. You couldn’t leave him, he needed you in his life. The light of his life and the feeling of comfort he so rarely felt was only with you.

Kaz sat in the chair beside your bed and his head leaned on the wall behind him with his eyes closed. You stirred yourself awake and took a moment to remember everything. You look around the familiar room and then down at the pain in your side. A bandage wrapped around your side and only in a bra. “Damn.” You cursed and put your head back.

A small snore caught you by surprise and you looked to the side and saw Kaz asleep. He looked calmer then normal but he still had a snarl on his face, it made you laugh a bit. As much as you could without hurting your side. “Kazzel.” You poked his leg. It took a moment and then shot up and it startled you a bit. He looked panicked and then looked down at you, he looked terrified.

“I’m okay.” You whispered with smiled. Kaz blinked as he saw you up and talking. “Y/n.” He pushed up and moved closer to and leaned down the bed. “Kaz, how long have you been here?” He swallowed. “As long as you have been out, you scared the others.” His hand came up to your cheek and softly moved his fingers on the skin.

“I’m not going that easy.” Smirked up at him. He looked at you and his eyes softened. Leaning himself down he pressed his lips against yours and kissed you softly. He was so afraid he would never get to do that again, or to have you in his arms or seen you smile. You took your hand and put it on his chest to remind him that you were still here.

“Good, because I don’t plan on losing you. You’ll stay with me, even if I have to bring you back to life myself.” He whispered against your lips and put his forehead on yours. And he was true, if he had to drag you out of deaths claws he would do it. He’d fight the saints himself to have you stay with him.

“You’re stuck with me, Kaz Brekker.” You teased and connected your lips with his again.

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker x fem!reader #Jesper fahey #wylan van eck #inej ghana #Nina zenik #matthais helvar #six of crows #six of crows x reader #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #kaz brekker angst #kaz brekker fluff

[targaryenluvs]

Kaz x Jesper x reader that doesn’t like being touched for long periods of time

Baby Steps

kaz x fem!reader x jesper

warnings: touch aversion, comfort?

a/n: i didn’t really know how to put this into a story so i decided to do headcannons, im sorry if this isn’t what you had in mind!

- There would be so much understanding from both of them in my opinion.

- Since Kaz himself has a strong aversion to touch he wouldn’t even be approaching you with touch anyway.

- Kaz would 100% be dumbfounded.

- He’d never encountered someone who shared his condition and he’d silently appreciate the fact that you’d never expect him to work on his aversion in order to be with you. That you’d never pressure him into anything or expect a lot in terms of physical intimacy.

- But you both shared the frustrations.

- When the other person is looking absolutely gorgeous beyond words and all you want to do is hug them, to play with their hair, kiss them etc. Having a hollow feeling inside when Jesper would be so overly affectionate when around everyone else but feel like he had to change how he acted when it came to the two of you.

- You never wanted him to change. Neither did Kaz. As much as he acts as if Jespers over the top self annoyed him, he more so envied him. Jesper never has to worry, he doesn’t need stupid gloves every day to keep him calm. He can drink and eat anything without feeling like the world is crushing down on him.

- He doesn’t look in the mirror and loathe.

- But what he hates most of all is that he can touch you. And Kaz can’t.

- You hadn’t had a traumatic background that had scarred you to the point of aversion and panic attacks.

- At times touch just became too much. Your senses would feel as if they were on fire. Like anything touching you felt as if bugs were crawling all over you. You could handle smaller things in smaller batches.

- It was nowhere near as intense as Kaz but it happened usually during the day. You’d be holding hands with Jesper and you’d suddenly drop his hand and walk with distance between the two of you.

- During the start of your relationship you hadn’t told either of them.

- So imagine Jespers surprise when you swatted his hand away whilst the three of you were in Kaz’s office.

-

“What was that for!” Jesper yelled as he cradled his hand. You frowned, “I didn’t- I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.” Jesper tilted his head, “Is this for eating your chicken last night? I am sorry you know, but it smelt, amazing.” He dragged out.

“No that’s- you ate my food? I blamed Matthias! Poor guy was as red as the blood on Kaz’s cane.”

Kaz glimpsed down at his cane, he cleaned it everyday, not a speck of blood, poor analogy.

“It’s just, sometimes when I’m being touched, I have to pull away. I don’t know how to explain it but I just, sometimes it’s too much and I can’t handle it. I’m sorry if that disappoints you-”

“Don’t apologise for it. I don’t.”

You smiled gratefully at Kaz as he made eye contact with you. Jesper rested his hand by yours on the desk, “You don’t have to force anything. If you feel like pulling away, pull away. Thank you for telling us, I promise you don’t have to. Not like Kaz makes any effort to touch me, it’s been a long time.”

“Say one more word and I’ll tell her about Milo.”

Jesper gasped as he brought his hand to his heart, “I’m proud of Milo. Whatever makes you think I wouldn’t tell anyone about my baby?”

“Who’s Milo?”

“Milo is Jes’s-”

Jesper shot up from his seat and pointed accusingly at Kaz.

“Don’t you dare!”

-

As frustrating it was for Jesper to have not one, but two partners with aversions he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

He loved you both and you’d work on your barriers together,

Baby Steps.

#kaz brekker x fem!reader #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker fluff #kaz and jesper #jesper x reader #jesper fahey x reader #shadow and bone x reader

[aysegust]

I WILL RESCUE YOU. - K.B

A/N: Okay, this comes of very late I know but I need to make somethings clear. If you know that English is not my main language, so I didn't write a second part for this fiction because of that and now I felt ready for this and I hope you'll like this. I'm in my exam week and I will take an exam for college end of the year so, I can't be active a lot, however, I want to write again so... I will write ofc! -So this is the second and last part for I WISH I WERE- Warnings: Angst, fluff ending. I don't own you or anything and this lovely song is from Lauren Daigle - Rescue :) Word count: 4K! :)

After that incident, you were hiding behind the shadows. As to be not seen or not to be heard. What happened with eavesdropping on Kaz and only to be caught up to Jesper and with that left him dumbfounded was making you sick. You wanted to talk to them, you wanted to laugh with them, or just sit and plan a heist with them.

 However, your desires were left to burn inside you. Of course, you felt pain a hundred times but this was the most painful of them all… You wished, you deeply wished to come back to the day that you injured yourself. You wouldn't make that mistake again so you wouldn't get hurt like this. Because this was so painful…

"Thank you for the sweater." Inej's voice rang inside your head. You replayed that scene like thousand times and the aftermath…

 You were sitting in the Crow Club, watching men gamble and quietly drinking your tea, too caught up in the thoughts but a voice interrupted you. “Care to explain why you're so distant, Y/N?” It was Inej, your beloved friend. You loved Inej, truly. She was so sweet towards you. She loved you and you loved her too. So, you just couldn't blame her for this whole situation. You looked at her, so sleepy. 

“Well, a lot is going on so, I had things to arrange-" She cut you so softly yet so sharp. “Don't lie to me, I'm your friend.” She took a deep breath and looked at you with worried glances. “Y/N, I'm worried about you. We all are.” That sentence made you smirk a bit. Because you wanted to laugh about the idea that Kaz cared about you and worried for you… 

“Seriously Inej, don't you have better things to do?” You felt your stomach twisted to see your dear friend's sadder glances. She sighed. “I'm not gonna push you, but know this, If you ever need to talk I'm with you.” You squeezed her hand. “Thank you, Inej. That means a lot to me.” You said as she left you alone. To yourself.

"I wish I were Inej." That poisoned thought came to your mind again as you felt unease so you got up and about to leave for fresh air, someone shouted your name. Saints! Can't you just leave me be… You thought to yourself as you turned around and found Jesper staring at you with grinned teeth. 

“There you are! I missed the bloody face of yours, angel!” You couldn't help yourself but smile at him. “You don't have to shout at me, you know.” He came to your side to hold you. “Can't help it, you were ghosting me, and even I was the innocent one!” You smirked. “Can you believe it?” He went on with his ramble again, only you shushed him as you hugged him. Deep down, you felt a bit guilty. You never wanted to ghost them. All of them, nevertheless you did. You had to, you needed to pull yourself together.

Suddenly, you felt crept about the idea, someone was watching you.

You are not hidden

There's never been a moment

You were forgotten

 When you looked up and saw his face through Jesper's shoulder, you quirked up. “What's wrong?” Jesper whispered into your ear. “Nothing, I felt cold.” You broke the hug as you avoided Kaz's glances towards you. “It was good to see you, too, Fahey.”

 You had remembered the night as you left the Slat to Ketterdam's cold streets, as Jesper behind you, yelling for you to stop running away. As you confronted him about what you heard, you remembered he held you against his arms, as an amazing brother as himself. You wouldn't forget that.

 As the time passed to the night and you heard from Jesper that Kaz wanted to see you, you were so sure that he now wanted you to leave the club as you were the weakling. You stepped firmly into his office. Couldn't be able to forget the incident so you just shushed your emotions to taking the better of you. “You wanted to see me?” You told him with a little hint of concern in your voice, however, you masked it. 

 “You said you were taking a break to arrange something about your private life. So, I didn't interrupt you.” He paused for a second and looked at you. Like he was eyeing you with those sharp eyes of his. You knew he totally understood. You felt a bit unsettled so you lowered your gaze to somewhere else as you waited for him to speak again.

 He saw it. He saw you, as you lowered your gaze. How could he ever be blind as you were in front of him? With all of your vulnerability, he knew you were so strong, yet so smart. He blamed himself for not coming after you as you tried to find him on that mission day and after that, he blamed himself for not making some things clear with you that day.

You are not hopeless

Though you have been broken

Your innocence stolen

“You know Y/N, crows care for their pack. If someone in the pack got hurt, or taken, crows will be there for them and never leave their side.” You got a bit confused at first, cause he made you feel a lot of things. “I know you got hurt by something and also Inej and Jesper know it too.” He paused. He was never this direct before. “I get this, you needed some privacy to get over it. But-“ You cut his word in half as an unsettled feeling crept upon you.

“Kaz, why are you saying this to me?” You got a bit frustrated about this whole speech. “I'm saying this, It's because the team needs you to come back.” The team, of course. You looked at him with nothing, as you felt nothing at that moment. You were kinda in a denial at first but now you were accepting the hard truth that he will never love you like that. 

 He can sense your frustration, and when he looked into your eyes, he saw the pain. He meant something more, but, at that moment he understood so deeply that you were in some denial. You were missing some part and he needed to figure out what happened there… About what really happened to you… “Yeah, I don't need any break anymore.”

—

 It was one of these days that Kaz gathered all of you in his office and explained something about the new mission. It is extremely dangerous work but he knew his crows can pull this out. So, he explained the plan and Jesper interrupted with a show-off. “You know, boss, this beauty,” He shoved his face, “can do anything perfectly.” You and Inej smiled at him as you guys shared a glance. You guys were on better terms. Inej was always good but you make it better with her. To ease the misunderstandings. “Whatever you say, Jesper!” Inej said while you gathered your things. 

 Night came and y’all had your positions. Inej was on the roofs to watch out for guards. As Jesper hid outside near the garden to check out for some clearance, You and Kaz were alone. Waiting for a signal to enter the luxury place. When you heard a tiny frequency from Inej it was the sign to enter the place. 

 You were behind the Kaz as both of you entered. You were cautious as something can happen in a minute so you controlled areas. “Check the first door, I will head south.” He gave you an order. When you went quietly and quickly to the first door; you saw that it was unbelievably silent. You looked at the tables, there were papers everywhere as you checked and read some of them. 

 While you were reading and Inej was on the roof, she heard a noise. As she looked behind her, she saw a figure searching for her. She quietly changed her place for a better view, she understood then… They were trapped. Someone baited them or heard. 

 Jesper cleared the area, it was easy for him. He even got bored waiting for them to finish. Honestly, he didn’t understand what was going on between Kaz and Y/N. He thought their love was requited as he and Inej bloody saw his gazes towards Y/N. He was too caught up thinking this however, he was careful in the mission. So, he heard some cracking. When he looked behind the building's garden, he saw some explosion articles. “Oh, Saints!” He sweated and as he turned to the side, Inej also heard an explosion in the garden. 

“Hello, Wraith.” Inej heard a man's voice. As she was hiding behind something as she wanted to assassinate that man. She got exposed when she left her hiding spot. “And who are you?” She asked as he could her firm voice. “Your killer.” As he said it, she smirked. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” She threw a knife at him but he was quick, he dodged it. 

“You and your bastard boss will never know what will happen to them!” He said with such rage. She didn’t answer. Whereas she dodged one of his counters. She was quicker than him, but his grip was powerful. He sure looked like a vulture mixed with something. He took one of Inej’s knives and pushed her to the ground. “Is that all you got, Wraith?” He smirked. That smirk disgusted Inej. 

  Jesper was laying on the ground, trying to pull himself together because of the explosion. Then he heard steps towards him. After he looked up and quickly rolled to the side, he saw a Grisha. What the hell is a Grisha doing in Ketterdam? He thought. When he seized the Grisha’s kefta he saw that it was a Durast, indeed. 

“Let's begin, shall we?” He quietly said so cautious not to be heard. He moved silently to the side and he shot fire at the Grisha. Unfortunately, Grisha was quicker too. So she bent over and smiled. “You think that would kill me?” She smirked. “Well, let’s see what will happen, don’t we?” He mocked her voice. That pissed her, so she ran to the side and she pulled some knives at him. Whilst she was throwing the knives, Jesper shot them all and they went directly to the wall. 

 She then pulled something inside her pocket and she threw it at him, it was intoxicating. “What the hell is that?” He coughed but he didn’t stop his movements as he ran to the side, she didn’t answer his question. 

 He had to kill the Grisha. So, he moved out from where he was and he shot three shots. Grisha laughed at that. “Is that all you got, you a dwarf?” Jesper’s bitterness could be read by his face as he heard the nickname that she gave. It was disrespectful. Other than trying to kill him, of course. 

 So he shot another shot at her Kefta and she suddenly felt weak. “How?” when she took the bullet and was about to hit him with that bullet, Jesper went out and shot her in the head. “You are not the only Durast.” He silently spoke as she fell to the ground. 

 While Inej was under his grip, she was looking at the sides of the roof, as she tried to find a way to loosen his grip so she could get away from him. She saw a ceiling fan with which she struggled under him. “Hush, love, I’m almost done.” He was squeezing hard on Inej’s neck. As she moved her leg to hit his foot, she took out a little knife. 

 While his grip on her loosened a bit, she stung her knife into his leg. He hissed and he moved a bit back so she got away from his grip and suddenly she felt the air in her lungs again. Of course, Inej felt dizzy because of the cut of air, and the air coming back was hurting her throat and by the dizziness, she needed her strength. 

 However, that vulture-looking man was about to run to her side. But Inej was always quicker. So she moved her body to the left and she threw a knife at his eye. He screamed with such pain when she ran to him to break his neck. 

 When she came to his side to break his neck, he held her body and cursed something at her. He took her leg and when he tried to attack her with her knife, she pulled the knife out of his eye. So, he backed out and fell to the ground. 

 Inej made the final move and she cut his throat. “May Saints, will be with you and try to help you on your sickening journey in another world.” Then, she leaned against the wall and rubbed her throat to ease the pain.  

 You heard some explosions on the garden side as you were close to the window, you looked down and saw some light. You got utterly worried about what was that explosion. 

I hear you whisper underneath your breath

I hear your SOS, your SOS

 You needed to find him. To find him and protect him from any harm that he could ever see right now. Of course, that dirtyhands could protect himself from any harm or even protect you from anything, however, you were so deeply in love with him so, that made you worry so much. 

 As you ran in the dark corridors of the big mansion, you felt panic rising in your throat, you licked your dry lips when you heard some muffling steps sounds from the south corridors. 

I will send out an army to find you

In the middle of the darkest night

It's true, I will rescue you

 When you rushed to the side of a colon, you lowered your body and try to fit in hiding at the spot. As you heard some hisses from guys, you took a knife from your pocket, whilst you quickened your pace to catch the guardians off guard, you saw Kaz being held by outnumbered men. You saw his worried glances towards you. 

There is no distance

That cannot be covered

Over and over

 You felt anger so deep at that moment. As you saw him being captive by guards, you threw your knife at the guard who held Kaz tightly. The knife hit his eye, and as his body fell, Kaz pulled away from him. He quickly found his cane when you took your gun from your holster to shoot that guy who ran towards you to beat you. 

 He got up after you killed the other guy, and when you saw the third guy that was about the attack you with his blade, Kaz hit him with his cane. The cane got bloody by second after he then pulled the cane and beat him with that cane all over. 

 You were afraid when you saw him like that. Blood splashed all over his face, as his features got sharpened and he was so focused to beat that man. You saw how messy his hair got after he was held captive by that man you killed, you were so afraid that you thought you lost him. 

"Kaz! It's enough!" You rushed to his side to stop him. When your slight brush to his arm, he startled. You immediately pulled yourself back. "It's enough." You repeated with a whisper. He looked at your face as to begin to say something, he quickly looked behind you as he saw footsteps coming towards both of you. "Come behind me!" He yelled at you. 

You're not defenseless

I'll be your shelter

I'll be your armor

 You went behind him as you gave him your gun. You quickly took two knives from your pockets that Inej gave you after your first mission with them. You held them tight, when more men entered the room you threw the knives at their heads as Kaz shot one of them after your attack. Three men fell on the ground when you rushed to exit the door, you were running in the corridors, trying to find a way to escape. You saw Kaz had stolen what he wanted at the beginning. 

I hear you whisper underneath your breath

I hear your SOS, your SOS

"There!" He leads the way for you. When you both come down the stairs, you saw two more men coming your way. "Go upstairs and jump from a window, I'll handle this." You looked at him in disbelief. "I won't leave you!" You yelled and you jumped at one of the armed men's faces as you cut his neck with your blade. You saw one of them coming at you but Kaz shot them in the head. 

 You two fight with more men, however, the injuries you got from fighting those men, one of them cut a big scar on your belly. You didn't mind it at first because of the adrenaline, you and Kaz cleared the area downstairs, and as you ran away to the exit you finally saw Jesper. "Jesper, quickly!" You yelled at him as you held your belly. 

"We got trapped, Kaz!" Jesper squirmed. Anxious glances towards him as you saw Inej is already coming your way. "We dealt with this later. Now we need to leave right now!" Kaz raised his voice as he looked at his sides to find their carriage. When he couldn't find it, he looked at all of you. "We'll split up. Inej, I want you to go on the roofs if we are being watched." He then turned his gaze to Jesper. "You will go with Y/N." Inej looked at him. "You will go alone?" She sounded unsure. "Yes." He replied with a simple word. 

 You couldn't intervene in his sentence as Jesper pulled your arm to push you aside with him. All of you were escaping from this broken mansion, you heard sirens. No one saw you on the outside as you and Jesper entered the Slat first with the help of the darkest alleys of the mighty Ketterdam. 

"Agh-" Your face got soured. No one saw the cut on your belly as y'all tried to escape from that bloody place, Jesper stopped his movements. "Seriously? You got injured!" He copied your gestures as he felt bad on the inside. "There were a lot of men in there, come on!" You hissed at the pain you felt. 

"Let me help you." A voice behind you gently said. As you turned your head to him, you felt a bit uneasy. "And how might you could help me?" You feared that he would be sickened about touching your body. But deep down you knew, he wanted to help you. But something was pulling him back. His greatest demons were pulling him back so tightly that he couldn't touch that person that he trust most. "Come with me." He leads you to his bathroom. It was a crooked place but it felt so safe for you. Him. 

You felt so safe with him. 

In the middle of the hardest fight

It's true, I will rescue you

 When he pulled a fresh bandage for your wounds, you watched him silently. You prayed the sky above so that you won't make something idiotic to ruin the moment. He hesitated at first. As to pick up your blouse to see a better view of the wound, you saw his sweaty forehead. "Kaz. I can do it by myself." You saw him struggling. He looked into your eyes. 

 He sighed and he backed away from you. It was enough for you. The thought of him being want to help you was enough for you. So you looked at the mirror and pulled up your shirt to take a better view, you silently hissed. When you looked at him through the mirror, you saw his bruised face. 

 You cleaned the area before you took the stitches to cover the open wound. You struggled a bit at first, but you were strong, you felt the adrenaline running through your veins. After you cleaned and stitched yourself, you held a wet, clean cloth and handed the cloth to him. "Here, for the dried blood."

 He accept it as he gently wiped his face with the wet cloth. "You saved my life." He didn't meet your gaze after the words fell on his lips. You watched him through the entire speech. "You saved my life so many times." You sweetly said. 

"It's even then." He spoke again only to meet with your gaze now. "Y/N... I want to be clear with you." He put the cloth away and came a bit closer to you. "What you heard, that day with Inej, you didn't hear the whole conversation." You felt a bit shame as you remembered eavesdropping on their conversations. When you tried to interrupt, he shushed you. "I am not going to deny that I gave Inej something from me, but the beginning of the conversation was to ask her about an opinion." You got confused at first. He went on with his explanation. 

"I was asking Inej... that...that- I wanted to give you," He paused. "I asked her about something. Something... for you." Your cheeks reddened as you heard his whisper. "Why?" You lowered your voice to meet his low voice. 

 He looked at you. You could see, he was very nervous. He was trying to find the right words to describe what he was about to say. You waited in silence. You were anxious too. So you waited for him, patiently because despite being anxious, you needed to hear him. 

 You were so lost in your own thoughts but then he spoke. "You are important, to me." He loosened his shoulders, it was tense. Due to the moment. You met his dark eyes as he spoke these five words. "I wanted to give you-" He paused then he pulled something from his pocket. You saw the packet, it was small and wrinkled. 

 He gave you the tiny packet as you looked at him, still confused but he could see the hope through your eyes. You were curious but the fear of rejection inside you was overwhelming. You took a deep breath as you opened the packet, it revealed a tiny necklace with a special silver crow head. You looked at him instantly as you saw the necklace. You hold the necklace up, how could you misunderstand everything? 

"Inej was helping me to find the right necklace." He didn't meet your eyes. Suddenly you felt guilt wash over you. "But- You were glancing at Inej." You hesitated, then your voice reached out as a whisper. "I saw it." He glanced at you softly. "I don't look at Inej, the way I look at you..."

 Your head was spinning so fast, you had to hold his table edge. When you looked at him again, you saw his worried glances at you. "Are you alright?" He asked you as you shook your head to say yes. "I was just confused. I thought you had feelings," You paused. "feelings for Inej." 

 "No, Y/N." He said calmly. "The thing about surviving in the Barrel is not to care or love anything." He sighed. "But I'm willing to take that risk If it's meaning that I could see your bright eyes every day." 

 You looked at him in pure shock. But you totally felt every word he meant. He truly meant it and you loved him so madly, so much. It felt a big relief to you, to feel your love is requited. You swore that day, that you will be there for him. 

 As for something you didn't know is that he swore this, was the day that he first helped you to get away from the Stadwatch.  

#kaz brekker #kazzle dazzle #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker angst #kaz brekker fluff #kaz rietveld #shadow and bone #reader insert #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker x you #six of crows #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker x fem!reader #kaz brekker x y/n #crooked kingdom #jesper and inej #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #y/n

[jeanbie]

SHARKBAIT ★ masterlist.

pairing: tolya x reader

warnings: long distance relationships, set after s2 | wc: 6.9k

note: i'm pining over tolya right now. also i know a loooot of fans view tolya as aroace so hopefully this reaches the right audience (and if the show runners or leigh ever confirm this then pls tell me)!!

⏤ Tolya can go months without seeing your face, but he can make out your shape in the darkness of the ship when you steal your visits, fleeing when the sun begins to light up the decks.

Tolya knew what it meant to long, to pine, to wonder and yearn for something you couldn't have. He saw it a thousand times with his poems, between the lines and in each stanza where a romance formed with metaphors and analogies; he saw it in his crew as they busied themselves across an unsteady ocean, searching for purpose and meaning in the vastness of blue and brown. He even saw it in his sister and passing maidens, in his captain and his need to be seen as something more than an amplifier, and he saw it in his own life- with his faith and his resilience, with his own novice works of poetry tucked into journals in his bunk, and in the whispers of silence between the two of you whenever he saw you again, and especially in the stretches of days where he didn't see you at all.

On board the Volkvolny, for what felt like years on end, Tolya had nothing but time to become familiar with what it meant to long. He'd stare out across the expanse of the sea, outlining your body in the clouds as they dipped below the horizon, in the waves rippling under the ship as it sailed away from Os Kervo to Kerch. Sometimes he thought he could make out your shape in the darkness of his bunk, a thin ghostly outline come to haunt him in his sleep, to torment his dreams. Often he woke up to a fading outline of body just to the side of his hammock, remembering that you weren't there, and wouldn't be for some time.

He supposed that he was lucky to be on this ship, with the world at his hands. There were days where he was so caught up in the passion of his work, alongside his never-faltering faith, that he didn't have time to think of you, instead only stumbling into your body through dreams, where you came to him as easily as the sea to the shore. Today hadn't been one of those days, and he feared that the crew on board the Volkvolny knew it too well.

It started off with his last nightmare. Taking steps together on a shoreline that looked like it belonged to a dip of earth in Shu Han, Tolya met you on the sands, his hand slotted into your own as he followed behind you, stepping into your sunken footprints. Tolya had been inches from your mouth before he was ripped away with the sound of horns and laughter, drops of water leaking through the deck overhead. Work was demanding his consciousness, and the image of you remained only on his eyelids as he groaned, rubbing his eyes sleepily. He'd gone about his day relatively normally after that, or about as normally as he could stomach it. Tamar had seen the worst of his mood- she watched him heave himself up the stairs to the deck with a frown deep on his face, an ache at the corner of his lips tugging down. The front he performed of happiness did little to arouse his crewmates, although they joined the spectacle, letting him think he was giving a performance of a lifetime.

For a while, his mood had settled. He'd only counted seeing you in hallucinations maybe three times, but he'd stopped counting after the third, and couldn't be sure if his mind was allowing him to stick with three for the sake of his own sanity. He'd spotted you in the twist of water under the bowsprit, once in the ripple of the sails and again in the clouds. After the third, his mood was so sour that he opted to be silent for the day's voyage. People never thought they'd miss the sound of his poetry until he took his pitiful vows of silence.

Saints, how he missed you. Each time you were gone, Tolya regretted every second of silence between the two of you, every time he passed up the chance to tell you how much he loved you. And each time you were here, back with him in his arms, he couldn't seem to find the words. You weren't part of the crew on voyage with the Volkvolny, although you were never not welcome as far as Sturmhond was concerned. It was just that you preferred being on land, seeking out thrills and leads and injustice, trying to piece together the gaps in your history. Tolya knew that was what held you to the Crows, and what Inej often said was your lifeline away from him. Still, Tolya yearned for the days you were back with him, however short and fleeting. Months could pass at sea and when he saw you again, it would be like no time had passed at all.

Kerch loomed in the distance. From the crow's nest, he was told that through the spyglass, the oblong shapes of Ketterdam ports could be seen, the buildings packed together tightly and the smoke rising in the air, thick and dark like fires were blooming in the streets. It would be about two days of sailing, if the winds kept up, but if they were lucky, they might arrive ahead of schedule. Tolya couldn't count the moments quick enough- two days would be agonising until he saw you again.

"Yeesh. I kinda miss your poetry right now." Tamar crept up from behind Tolya on the hull of the ship. Not far from where Tolya was standing, with his elbows holding his body up on the side of the beams, was Jacob's ladder, hitting the side of the vessel with irritating small clicks.

Tolya glanced at her, a smile naturally falling into place. As foul as his mood might have been, there was always room in his heart for his sister. "That's something I'll never hear you say again."

His sister grinned. "I'm serious! Go on, give me something?"

Tolya replied with quiet laughter, and Tamar did the same. The twins shared their laughter for a moment before finishing in silence, and Tamar stole a glance as her brother cast his gaze to the water, curving like ribbons around the underbelly of the ship.

"Missing her?" she asked softly.

Tolya rolled his eyes, but saying nothing was as good as admitting it. 

"You know," Tamar continued, spinning so her back was pressed against the beams, "you could always just ask her to come with you." She gestured to the prow, "come with us."

"She wouldn't want to do that," Tolya said, shaking his head.

"Oh, so you asked her already?"

"Well— no."

"Then how'd you know?" 

Tolya sighed, twisting his head. He knew that you were as good as a Crow— although not exactly affiliated in whatever Kaz did or did not do, anybody who knew you knew that you did work for Kaz that filled the gap Inej made on the quest to find her brother. Even before that, you'd told Tolya that Kaz occasionally found himself asking for your help with requests that extended outside of his immediate access. You had been of some help to him finding the name of the slaver ships and traders, of which the Volkvolny was sailing back to Kerch to deliver rescued shipment (one lacking Inej's brother in tow, and the slaver who sold them). 

Your place was on land, on high ground. A bird could fly at sea, yes, but he feared you'd grow restless with little purpose on the ship. Everybody had a place and a role—he knew that simply being there for him wouldn't be a good enough reason for you to abandon whatever work you had unfinished on dry land, which is why he'd never asked you to come in the first place.

Tolya turned to face Tamar, eyeing her side-profile as she meticulously assessed the state of the ship. Many crewmates were down below, rifling through Shu poker cards and coins and sharing ghost stories with cups of ale and wine. 

"Have you ever been so scared of losing something good?" he asked suddenly, making Tamar look back at him. 

"All the time," she replied. 

Tolya dared a glance back at the ocean, relieved that he didn't find you there. "Every time I see her again, it's like magic. Bigger and grander than any kind of Saint-like act. She becomes the most important thing in the room." He blinked. "I don't want that feeling to go away."

Tamar tilted her head, as if to say, 'Go on'. There was a comfort in their twinnish bond, but even with that, Tolya struggled to find the words. Writing poetry was easy—every embarrassing thought could be passed off as fictional prose, but in a conversation it wasn't quite as easy to put on a façade. At the best of times, Tolya was as cool as a sea-cucumber, with an easy going air that put people at ease. Just another performance of a lifetime, but he didn't have to pretend sometimes when he was with his sister.

"We're just very different," Tolya said cautiously, almost like he didn't believe it were true as he said it. "I'm worried she might grow too used to me. Might get restless."

"Bored, you mean?" Tamar interrupted. When Tolya said nothing, she threw herself into extended conversation, "Brother, she adores you. That kind of love is special. And if she didn't love you more when you were doing what you do best- as in, meandering around this beast with your poetry and stupid jokes-" He looked at her with a rising smile- "-then you'd be better off for it."

His stomach churned. He didn't want to be better off without you. 

"Besides," Tamar offered her last words of comfort before pushing herself up and away from him, "there are thousands of men and women in the world for her to see each passing day, and yet she still falls into those arms of yours when we arrive in Ketterdam. If she can love you from a hundred miles away, then I think she'll manage loving you and your quirks on the open sea."

There was an insufferable ache in Tolya's chest whenever he thought back to his conversation with Tamar. 

He'd busied himself the next day, throwing himself into heavy work around the ship as it sailed nearer to the coastline. His crewmates were thankful to see him in reasonably good spirits— Sturmhond had been particularly put off by his lack of comedic timing the day before, and had tried to think back to his own experiences with Alina back in Ravka, putting the pieces together in his own time— but they knew it was bought time with Tolya's pleasantries. Tolya wouldn't be at ease until they docked and only then could his mind be put at ease. It was always the days before returning to Ketterdam where Tolya seemed at his darkest, and it had happened enough times that they should all be used to it, but the sight of his downturned face never got any easier to process.

Night ensued, the moon casting a fickle light to the ocean as it lulled to a cool and calm tempo. The winds were kind tonight, not carrying the wind in an angry gust, and the waves were short and fluid. No storms hid behind thick flurries of clouds, and the creatures below whipped their fins and tails in harmony— no trouble would come tonight, he thought, and glad of it.

Tolya lay in his hammock, staring at the wooden boards above his head. Around him, his crew slept in peaceful slumbers, and to the far side of the room he could see the auburn light of Sturmhond's—now Mal, now that the charade was over— little black lamp sheltered next to a book he'd inherited with his title, now reading to fall asleep. Tolya sighed, his gaze back above. 

The glow of light to his left allowed room for your shape to slowly appear, just an outline that got more hazy in his memory as the months went by. He gulped, the lump in his throat hard and sour tasting, and he closed his eyes quickly to throw away the image of you. Yet you remained, imprinted on his eyelids, smiling as he found sleep to take him away into the night.

When he awoke, he could hear the caw of gulls and loud voices beyond the ship, louder than what he knew his crew to be capable of. Tolya stirred for a moment before coming to his senses, his eyes honing in on the same spot he'd last seen you in above his slumbering form. The forecastle was bathed with yellow light, with the sun at an angle pouring down through the hatch to the upper deck, and as he awoke, Tolya could smell the distinct scent of crab hooks and wet moss, the lingering scent of oil and sewage and copper. Strange, he thought.

Balancing on the hammock, Tolya raised himself with his elbow and stole a glance around the forecastle. Two men lay snoring, too drunk the night before, and he noticed a third figure at the foot of his hammock, their back to him but hiding nothing about their identity. His heart lurched, he baulked, and the hammock twisted beneath him with a sudden jolt and his body was sent to the floor with a thud and a grunt.

"Easy, sharkbait."

Tolya's head whipped up quickly, the click in his neck aching. It was you- Y/N, his beloved Y/N, dressed in a blue coat that looked like Mal's. Underneath you wore a dark brown shirt tucked into your trousers—today the attire was more casual, for when you were at work you wore black and black alone. Inej told him it was to blend in with the night, but Tolya reckoned it was also because it flattered you.

You smiled at him warmly, laughing when he didn't move from the floor.

"Come on. Don't tell me after a few months you've forgotten this face?"

Tolya's mouth opened and closed. "What—no! How could I—wait, is that Mal's coat?"

He heard your laugh again as you drew near, pulling his bicep to pick him up off the floor. You were more than capable of pulling his weight, but you still found fun in pretending you couldn't. Tolya rose from the floor, both of his salt-soaked hands gently wrapping around your wrists as he faced you. A smile dawned on his lips as he drank in the image of you; fully fleshed out, solid, real, not a figment of his desperate imagination.

"I saw him up top," you told him. "He looks good as Sturmhond, right? I was almost charmed." You said it with a grin that made Tolya think otherwise, and you shuffled closer towards his torso, the action welcomed as his grip fastened slightly around your arms. 

"Charmed enough to take his clothes?" Tolya asked. He knew that there would never be anything there with Mal—Saints, everybody knew that. Mal was too busy having his own mental quarrels with Alina to entertain the thought of somebody else, and well, you seemed perfectly content being charmed by a different captain below deck, smiling at you with sleep still hanging in his eyes.

"I always did look good in blue," you said.

Tolya hummed. "Yeah."

Falling into a silence, Tolya's eyes flickered across your face, soaking up the sight of you, making a mental note of what had changed while he'd been away. Not much, he found, bar a few scratches across your left cheek flanking down to your chin, and a greenish bruise under your eye. He frowned, moving his hand to ghost his fingers across the painted skin. Meanwhile, you did the same, observing changes in his appearance, concluding every detail: the richer tan across his skin, the stubbly pricks of hair around his jawline and the appearance of a new mark under his right nostril. Drunk on the image of him, you fixed your eyes back on his, surprised to see him already looking.

"What're you doing down here anyway, sharkbait?" you asked. Your voice was lower, quieter and softer, but he knew it had nothing to do with a shift in mood. Instead, you were just simply close enough for him to hear you without strain, close enough to hear you whisper, to hear you breathing. 

Tolya offered a boyish smile. "You know."

"Had a long night?"

"Terribly long."

"What, enjoying someone's company til sunrise?" you teased, entertaining what could be signs of an insecurity in the bilge of your belly. Tolya pretended to ignore it, yet his heart sank nonetheless. 

"Come on, you know me better than that," he laughed, bringing you in closer to him. Tolya nestled his nose against yours, moving it across your face to your cheekbone and closing you in with his arms around your shoulders. He sighed, comfortable. He'd missed this, the way your body felt against his, the way your arms felt around him. Saints, he'd missed this. Tolya took in a breath, his nose above your ear. "I've missed you."

Tolya heard a hum near his sternum, rumbling with a small vibration. It made his body bristle slightly but he warmed to your touch, his arms tightening around you.

"Me too, moi sol ye tselai," you replied, feeling his nose twitch as a smile grew on his face. 

For a moment you stayed like that, entangled in the quiet of the forecastle. Tolya didn't waste a single second of it, not after the torment he'd given himself just hours before. After some time, Tolya felt you wiggling in his arms and he relaxed, opening the distance between you as he leaned back to look at your face. You looked back at him with a smile, head angled up to marvel at him, and Tolya's eyes shifted into crescent moons as he brought his head down to kiss you. 

His one hand cradled the side of your face, the other at the back of your neck, and you made no resists to his advancements. Tolya kissed you deeply, lost in the familiar taste of your lips, sweet like the breakfast you must have ate before coming down here. He felt you kiss him back, the pressures combined, your hands up around his wrists. Your head leaned back slightly, his dominance slightly more assertive, as he captured your lips once, twice, thrice, never allowing a minute of rest.

When he did pull back, he was met with your widened eyes, shining in the light, and you bit down on your bottom lip to try and refrain from a smile. He saw it anyway, kissing you once more in a swift gesture and bringing himself back in what he thought was a commendable act of self restraint.

"I take it we are in Ketterdam," he asked, more of like a statement. It had to be true, since you were here. Unless he was dreaming, which he had a sinking feeling that he could be, perhaps trapped in a powerful lucid dream, some kind of sleep paralysis that had him smooching something akin to a squid on the prow. Unlikely, but not impossible, given his mood these days.

"How else would I be here?" you replied with a gentle laugh. 

He held you by your waist as you turned, observing the forecastle he sometimes called home. Tolya freed his grasp with reluctance, holding your fingers til the last second and he fell forward a few steps trying to grab you back. You moved around the hammocks, ducking under a lamp with a feigned interest in the bunks. Tolya didn't like to use his heartrending on you, but he could hear your hammering heartbeat even without using his talents. He smiled in private, watching you with adoration.

"I arrived here as soon as you docked," you explained, still looking around. Tolya hummed with interest, leaning his weight against a support beam. "I was having breakfast with Nina when Jesper told me that your Volkvolny was coming to the harbour. I finished, paid and came here as fast as I could. You didn't meet me at the deck, but it was so early, I figured you'd be sleeping. I greeted your crew, shook hands with your new captain, hugged Tamar, stole a coat and then came down here." You smiled, spinning back to look at him. Your bravado was complete. "To answer your question—yes. Welcome back to Ketterdam."

Tolya loved when you launched into explanations like this. He had a series of entries in a journal you shared where you'd given full detailed accounts of your adventures, but the ink never did justice to the words as you said them. Tolya's grin widened. 

"Kaz wanted to speak with you, too," you added, stepping back towards him and stretching out your hand. Tolya's stomach churned again when he took it with his own, feeling the small blisters across your skin from all your ropework and midnight affairs as an unofficial Crow. Like his own, actually, littered with chafes and burns from the ropes to the masts, sea salted splits across his hands whenever he got too heavy handed around the deck or in other ports. 

"Let's go up, then."

You led the way, all the way to the stairs where Tolya enjoyed watching you ascend before following. It'd been a minute, he'd take whatever he could to feel like everything was good again. Once he stepped up out of the dappled light of the forecastle, he cringed in the brightness of the sun. It was never very bright in Ketterdam, but anything was brighter than the lamplight below. The harbour was alive with noise and merchants. He never missed the smell of Ketterdam, although he admitted that it was a stench that one really did grow accustomed to, as it were with any foreign harbour.

From the deck, he could see the stretch of sea behind him and back ahead, a small cluster of faces across the way. He knew them all already, each by both name and face, and he stepped towards his sister-in-command with you close in tow. His body shivered when your hands smoothed around his middle to manoeuvre around him and Tolya watched you meet your hip with Inej's. Tolya spared another hungry glance at you and then looked back at Kaz expectantly, as he launched into an explanation on affairs in Ketterdam.

The Volkvolny would stay in Ketterdam just shy of a day, giving Tolya more anxiety than it did comfort. There wouldn't be enough time for him to remind you of how much he missed you, and there was certainly no privacy for him to put it into actions instead of words. But business needed to be swift, that was if they wanted a good chance at catching the ships that both you and Kaz felt could hold the secrets to Inej's brothers' whereabouts. The Crow Club was magnificent, but no place for a love-filled reunion, and he couldn't see either of you feeling particularly romantic in the streets. With the Volkvolny being groomed for their next sail, Tolya resorted to holding you close at all times, with meaningful stares and listening with colourful interest about your life over a table in the club, while Kaz oversaw his business and friends reunited once more. Tolya ate up what he could learn about your life during the three months he was at sea.

You had been working with Kaz to crack down harder on slavery leads, finding nothing much about your own family and little to nothing about anybody else's. Inej had been given a much narrower list of names thanks to your good work on the streets, and Tolya heard from Jesper that you'd been a useful asset to the Crow's, although always declined the hospitality of their affiliation for some reason. Meanwhile Tolya offered what he thought might interest you the most about his time away; battles against rough waves, giant squids and krakens lurching from below, sharks and dolphins scratching the surface of the water with their fins chased by swirling serpents; funny tales from travellers in different ports, a retelling of Mal's first night getting drunk at sea. 

Tolya thought, as you mused and laughed opposite him at the table with your friends and found-family, that you were most beautiful when you were off guard. As he stared at you, he felt his heart tug once more. In just a few hours, there'd be nothing left to look at, just shadows in the dark, voices in the wind mimicked by sirens as they fondled the underbelly of the boat, enticing deaf ears to the water as the crew grumbled and sang over their call. The thought of leaving you made him feel sick.

He briefly thought about what Tamar had said. It was true that Tolya had never asked you to join him at sea, but he was pretty sure he knew what the answer would be. There would always be something keeping you here, keeping you both apart.

"How long this time?" you asked, when you both managed to steal some time alone to walk along the dark streets of Ketterdam. With Rollins in prison and with Kaz taking command of a smidge of the barrel, you figured it would be safe out here. Besides, Tolya was tall enough to tower over even Fjerdans, and that was no easy feat. Anyone dumb enough to pick a fight with a man his size could break a few bones trying, even if you both knew that out of the two of you, you had more practice taking down the big guys.

Tolya dipped his head. "If we're lucky, then a month or so." He paused, thinking, "You said that list you gave to Inej was accurate, right?"

"I think so. Every lead I had took me right back to those three names," you replied. Inej had flinched at the sight of them, meaning your hunch was accurate enough to give Tolya the hope of coming back soon. 

"If the winds are kind, and the journey is good, we can be back before it starts getting cold here," Tolya said, almost like he was making a wish at a well or a plea to a Saint. "Without any luck on our side, it could be longer..."

You frown, looking over at Tolya and tightening your grasp on his hand. "We'll manage."

"I hope so, milaya," Tolya said, kissing the back of your hand. 

Once you both reached a bright streetlight, you turned to face him. "Do you think it will ever end?"

Tolya paused. "What do you mean?"

"As in…this search. Once you find Inej's brother, what comes next?" you ask. You turn away slightly, Tolya's gaze tight on your movements. "Suppose you'll go sailing to wherever next, right? Or…will you stay a while?"

Tolya knew what you were asking, obvious in what you didn't say. There had been countless times where Tolya had imagined himself throwing his life on the Volkvolny away just to be with you, to retire with you to some peaceful town with no worries, nothing at all but peace gifted by Alina tearing down the fold and enough money and shelter to settle down, explore the world, fall deeper in love. But the Volkvolny was his life, his meaning when he didn't fall into his faith. You were his love, his beloved, but neither one could expect the other to give up their identity to be somebody they weren't.

"I'm not sure," Tolya said truthfully. "And yourself? You're so busy with Kaz here, you may well be a Crow by the next time I see you. Your work seems to spring up like fleas."

Your mouth tilted downwards. He was right. Tolya was the love of your life but there would always be the issue of work. Without your demand with the Crows, what were you? Nothing but a shadow skulking around the city, tailing crooks, locating slaves? You supposed you could be more—you'd thought about it a few times, getting up and going with Tolya wherever he asked you to go. But those were dreams, frightening dreams you weren't sure Tolya saw eye to eye with. His voyages felt to you like escapes.

"Well—" Tolya broke through the silence, using his index finger to pick up your head by your chin. When your eyes met, he smiled warmly, kissing you. "Whatever comes next, I'll be there waiting for you."

Tamar stood beside Kaz and Mal as Tolya heaved himself up the ramp and onto the ship. You were close behind, shadowing his steps, cautious about even a step of distance. Tamar sighed loudly, and Kaz looked over at her and followed her gaze.

"What is it?" he asked. Kaz thought he already knew, but it didn't hurt to be sure.

"Oh, a lovers parting," she said dramatically. 

Mal smiled, not quite reaching his eyes. "If they're trying to be subtle about things, they're doing a terrible job."

Kaz observed the couple. Kaz knew you well enough to respect you, perhaps even call you a friend, and he had no obvious qualms with Tolya. He'd never forget his loyalty before Alina tore down the fold, and had no concerns about him being a weakness to who might just be his next Crow. He stared at the back of Inej's head for a second too long as she helped someone heave some shipment to a different compartment of the ship, and then he looked back to Tolya and yourself with a funny feeling twist in his stomach.

"Why grovel?" Kaz asked. "Y/N can leave at any time if she wishes."

Tamar glanced over quickly, as if the news was surprising to her. "She's not working?"

"Her work is done," Kaz said plainly. Tamar and Mal's look of confusion made him twitch with slight annoyance, but he otherwise elaborated on what they didn't know: "I told Y/N to find leads on the slavers. She supplied the list of three and now you will be on your way to locate them. Her task has been completed, and she is free to go."

"Yeesh," Tamar said, "way to make her sound expendable."

"Everybody is."

Kaz looked back at Tolya, holding you in his arms. "I have Nina on a lead already. Until I have something for Y/N to do, she is free to do whatever she pleases." He added as an afterthought, "After all, she's not under my employment."

Hm. Tamar and Mal exchanged a look, but said nothing.

"Will you be here? When we come back?" Tolya asked you. From afar, he could sense his sister's lingering gaze, and he spared a look, alarmed when he saw her, Mal and Kaz watching the pair of you.

"Most likely," you said. You followed his gaze and nodded your head in their direction, Tolya leading you by the waist back to the step-down where Kaz stood at the top, like a bouncer guarding the way. Tolya greeted each one with a glance and a smile before looking back at you.

There wasn't enough time this time around. Tolya's heart wrenched as he looked at you, trying to remember every detail before he had to leave. Their stops in Ketterdam were never very long, but how he longed for a day more by your side, simply one more hour in your company. The thought of leaving you made his throat harden, tears springing behind his eyes. A blink would surely set them free, but he knew the ways to keep them hidden until he was safe in the darkness, not until you came to him in a premonition like a sick joke.

Tamar and Mal—Sturmhond, now he was back on the wood of the ship— gave a look to Kaz in farewell and stepped around the back of you to move further on the deck. Tolya's heart quickened and you watched them go with a rapid look, glancing back at Tolya with twinkling eyes, twinkles he knew were tears and not reflections of light.

"None of that," he said quietly, with a small smile and he reached out to cup your face. Tolya guided you close for a kiss, and a bell rang from somewhere in the harbour and his heart leaped to his throat. He tugged you closer, kissing you harder. Kaz looked away, fixated on Inej but giving you at least the luxury of some privacy. Tolya lost himself in your kiss, his fingertips brushing your hairline and he swore he could taste the salt of your tears between his lips. Tolya pulled away from you slightly, his eyes slightly wide and breath raspy and all of a sudden: "Come with me."

There was a beat of silence.

If other crewmates heard, they didn't give much away. Kaz had torn his eyes from Inej in a painful defeat, with no option but to assess the lovers before him, and truth be told, Tamar and Sturmhond never stopped watching. Tolya didn't allow the silence to kill his courage. If he didn't say it now, he never would.

"I love you," Tolya said. "I love you so much—eya fyela chi, hm? And I know that your heart is here, with the city and the Crows and your life but, Saints, Y/N I see you in my dreams, I see you in the water and the sky and hear you in the ocean breeze. When I close my eyes, I see you in flashes. You have bewitched me, you are in my soul. I love you. Whenever we are apart, it's like a torment." He gulped. He sounded a lot like some of the amateur poetry he wrote when he felt lonely, poetry he sometimes recited to his crew if he got drunk enough. "So, please, please come with me. See the ocean, go across the sea. Be with me, stay with me—come with me."

His eyes searched your face for a sign, something—anything. You blinked, bewildered, holding his hands as they cupped your face.

"But…" you began to shake your head, and his heart sank deeper, "but my work…"

You spared a glance to Kaz. He could act like he hadn't been listening, but it wouldn't do anybody any good. You were almost startled to see him already observing you. 

"I don't need you," Kaz said simply. "I just owe you a debt."

"But, the slaves—"

"You did your job," he repeated. "So you're free to go."

Tolya was just as surprised as you were. He looked at Kaz with round eyes and met yours in a simultaneous turn. He wasn't quite sure what to say about any of it. Was Kaz telling you to go? Was he giving you permission, saying go, leave, or were you now useless to the Crows? Was it only because he had asked? Maybe you didn't want to leave.

"Am I fired?" you asked dumbly.

For a moment, you could have sworn you saw a flicker of a smirk on Kaz's face. "I expect your contract will need renewing upon your arrival. There are many things to do in Ketterdam, just not now. Not for you, at least."

You blinked. Processing his words felt like an eternity—you were free to go. Kaz had made it clear that you'd still have a life on shore when you arrived, if you even left in the first place. Marvelling at the thought, you looked back at Tolya. Travelling the oceans with him; being in his arms each night, getting to know the parts of him reserved to his crew, his faith and his poetry and his talents on the deck, seeing what caused the scars on his hands, what caused the creases in his skin; what he ate and drank, what he wore on different days, how his hair fell in the mornings when it wasn't fastened out of his face. All of that for the taking, and you just had to say the words.

Tolya's face didn't waver, giving nothing away as you said nothing to him. For a while, he thought he knew what you'd say. Tolya, I'm sorry, but I just can't—

"But where would I sleep?"

He hadn't expected that.

Laughter bubbled in his chest. "I think there's room for you in my hammock, if you'd like." He caught your look of doubt and grinned, "Aw, come on. I'm not that big."

"What would I do?"

Slowly but surely, Tolya thought he could sense hope building inside of him. You hadn't yet declined. Your piqued interest gave food for thought as Tolya studied your expressions.

"Well," he said, thinking about it. Actually he'd already thought about it, more than ten times out at sea, twice within the few hours they were in Ketterdam, "you could do anything you wanted. Gaze out at the seas. Play card games—in no time, you'll be a better player than Tamar. You could paint the decks, climb the masts, sit in the nest all day for all I care. I just want you to be with me, for longer than just a few hours." 

Tolya's eyes were almost pleading. You gazed into them. There was no need to think, you already knew what you wanted to say. Chewing the skin of your inner cheek, your eyes flickered to Mal. As Sturmhond, you figured whatever he said went. Tolya followed your gaze and laughed when he spotted the source of your interest.

Mal's eyes flickered, like he'd been alerted back to the present. He looked around innocently, refraining from smiling when he caught the glimmer in Tamar's eyes next to him. 

"Don't look at me," Mal said to you, shrugging his shoulders and raising his hands, "I'm not in charge."

When you next looked at Tolya, you were smiling. From the corner of your eye, Tamar clapped Mal on the shoulder and disappeared into the crew, helping Nadia unload cargo to a different spot below deck. For a second, Mal looked as though he didn't know what to do with himself, until he shuffled further towards the bow, scanning the horizon. Kaz was no longer on the ship when you turned to acknowledge him. You saw the shape of his coat disappear back into the masses in the harbour, and Jesper extended his hat in a farewell and turned to follow. Nina would understand, you hoped, as you were sure she'd still be occupied with freeing her 'hunk of meat'.

"What do you say, lapushka?" Tolya asked. He knew he was cheating by using the Ravkan tongue on you. You'd mentioned it was your mother language only once in passing, and he'd never wasted a second on charming you with it. He ran his hands up and down your arms, arching to look into your eyes with a wide smile on his face. Tolya grinned as he moved with your shyness, a laugh huffing through his lips. "Hm? Will you come with me?"

You laughed, giggled in his arms, as he brought you closer with a kiss under your eye. Squirming, you faked revolt, wrestling out of his grasp. Your smile told him your answer—the rest was roleplay. 

"I know we're going far from home," he said, watching as someone stepped close to pull up the ramp from the harbour. The distinct clink of the anchor filled his ears, departure would be soon and if you wanted to say no, then now was the time. You never did. "But I promise I'll take care of you."

You gazed at him fondly, reaching up to steal a kiss from his lips. He lingered, his face warm in the rising sun. "You can focus on your business, and I'll keep you safe from harm."

Tolya gasped teasingly. "You know the way to a man's heart, I see."

He pulled himself away, with some reluctance, with a grin and shuffled to aid his mates with assembling the ship. Before he could stray too far, you hooked your finger around the strap over his shoulders, used to hold his ensemble of guns and weapons. Tolya looked back as he felt the pull, the adoration in his gaze never faltering.

"Only the hearts of men I love," you told him, and he smiled, bigger and brighter, tilting his head as his eyes folded into Cheshire smiles before he winked, dipping his head back to look at his crew.

You watched him retreat along the deck, his assertion cool and respectful, commanding the attention of the crew as they fell into their formations. Figuring you had time to find your place, you stood rooted where you had been standing this time, casting one final look at the harbour; you bid silent farewell to the streetlights and carts, to the horses snuffling as they loaded merchandise and travellers into the carriages pulled by their strength, to the place you lovingly called home, until a new one found its way to you in the shape of a man named Tolya, who wherever you were together became your new anchor, the new place you fell to for comfort and safety. The man you loved, yours for the taking, for a life stretching past the horizon across that plane of endless sea.

#tolya yul bataar #tolya #tolya x reader #tolya yul bataar x reader #tolya imagine #tolya scenario #shadow and bone tolya #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone x reader #grishaverse imagine #tamar yul bataar #kaz brekker #jesper fahey #nina zenik #inej gafha #malyen oretsev #stormhund #tolya fluff #ittojean #shadow and bone #jeanbie

[wolfmoonmusic]

Calloused Hearts - 5

Summary: Hiding feelings is hard...but apparently, not for Kaz.

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Tidemaker!reader

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, mentions of death

w/c: 1.k

A/N: This one is kinda short but it's like a build-up chapter for the main stuff.

<prev chapter

Chapter 5:

“How are we going to find him? He could be anywhere in Ketterdam. Anywhere,” Jesper said, worry in his voice as he paced the room.

“Jesper if you’re not quiet, you will be the one who goes missing next,” Kaz warned.

Once Jesper had revealed that Wylan was missing, the 3 of you had found the others and were currently in Wylan’s room. 

Everyone was exhausted, and Jesper’s panic wasn’t helping anyone focus.

You sighed, “Kaz, calm down,” you said,turning your head to look at him. The relationship between the both of you had shifted significantly after your little moment in the office, and you found him standing not more than an arm’s distance away ever since.

He only gave you a blank stare, before resuming his inspection of the room. You looked to Jesper, ignoring everyone’s confused looks, and Nina’s amused one, as you gestured for him to follow you outside.

“What?” he asked the second you both were out. 

“I’m sorry,” you muttered. You couldn’t help but feel guilty for Wylan’s disappearance considering that Pekka was most probably counting on a trade off.

“If you think this is your fault, I can be the first to assure you, it’s not.”

“Yes it is. And you know it.”

Jesper sighed, looking down. You tried to meet his eyes,  “Jes.”

“I won’t lie, Wylan was taken to be used against us for you, but it’s not because of you,” he responded, looking straight into your eyes, with his tired ones.

You couldn’t help but nod, knowing arguing wouldn’t change anything. He shook his head, “I need a drink,” he said before walking past you. You watched him leave, disappointment crawling up in your chest. He didn’t deserve this. None of them did. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kaz was a mess. 

Would he ever admit it? No. 

Last night had left him feeling so many emotions that he couldn’t process them. At this point, he didn’t know if he wanted to. He wasn’t sure of the outcome and he didn’t like anything he wasn’t sure of. 

You were back. And as much as he had tried to convince himself that you weren’t the same person….you were. You were still Y/N L/N, his best friend. Especially after seeing you nearly flinch when Jesper had put his arm around your shoulder, he realized that he may not have been the only one that went through for 6 six years. Even Dirtyhands couldn’t stay mad at you after that.

And Jesper….he was gonna kill him. 

You were Kaz’s. 

And Jesper was hell bent on messing with that. At least,  it seemed so.

Kaz didn’t know if you felt the same way he did. If your heart raced everytime he was close. 

If he made all the demons seem more bearable. 

The way you did for him.

And as if just thinking about you was enough to bring you forth, you were standing next to him, staring at Wylan’s empty bed. 

“You think they did it here too?” you asked. 

Anyone else would’ve thought you were trying to make light of the situation. But Kaz wasn’t anyone. Your tone was off, a sliver of fear and anger tucked away under the disguise of a joke.

He just turned to look at you, your tired eyes already on him. He lifted a single eyebrow, causing you to let out a small laugh, the raging emotions in him multiplying rapidly. 

There was a tense silence after, both of you just staring at the empty room in front.

“Kaz-”

“We talked about this.”

“Kaz, what if he decides to kill Wylan if I’m not turned over? What then? Imagine Jesper’s state. Imagine everyone’s state,” you pleaded.

You were right. Kaz hated it.

Pekka wanted a trade off, and if he didn’t get one, the chances of him killing Wylan were high. 

But he couldn’t trade you off. Not now. He’d just gotten you back. Just the thought of losing you again, and this time in the hands of the very man that had ruined his life, made Kaz want to murder him with his bare hands. 

“No.”

“Kaz-”

“NO!” he yelled. “You don’t get it.”

“You would trade Wylan’s life for me?” you asked.

Kaz watched the fear and confusion in your eyes as the question hit him hard. 

The truth? He would. Maybe not Wylan’s life, but he would definitely not stay this calm if it was you in his place. Because you were so much more to him than family. Without you there was no him. No Kaz. You were the only thing that made him Kaz Rietveld. You were the only thing that made him human.

But he couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit how much you meant to him. Not then. Not now.

“No.”

And he swore he saw hurt flicker in your eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nina was having the time of her life.

Was she upset about Wylan? Of course!

But whatever was going between you and Kaz was keeping her mind too preoccupied. She knew Jesper had all the details, but what kind of a person would she be if she asked him at a time like this.

She’d felt the rise in heartbeats. The little jumps whenever you both looked at each other.

She loved the slow burn romance of it all. But knowing what you both felt for each other and watching the obliviousness of it all…she swore she would have to end up nearly killing one of you to get the truth out.

She watched as you abruptly left Wylan’s room, running upstairs.

But most of all, she felt your fast, steady heartbeat.

You were up to something. 

And it didn’t seem like something good.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tags: @ancientbeing10 @lila-kille @emmnf1 @gabby10100 @foulkryptonitepeanut @pinchofhoney @peaches1958 @lyria-skyfall @sabii5 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @tiana76 @breadbrobin @athenasproverbs @cryinghotmess @urlocalgeek

#fluff #x reader #x you #x you fluff #angst #grishaverse #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker angst #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker fluff #nina zenik #jesper fahey fluff #jesper fahey x reader #six of crows #six of crows x reader #jesper x wylan #wylan van eck #the crows #soc #tidemaker #grisha #grishaverse x reader #grisha netflix #shadow and bone s2 #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader

[misscongeniality18]

Masterlist !

Requests are open, use this guide to help you if you’re stuck!

* Smut (18+ Minors DNI)

The Night Agent 

Go Ahead and Watch My Heart Burn - The Night Agent Still Falling For You - Peter Sutherland x fem!reader Part One     Part Two Photograph - Peter Sutherland x Reader Nervous - Peter Sutherland x Reader I Do - Peter Sutherland x fem!reader Perfect - Peter Sutherland x fem!reader Keep Holding On - Peter Sutherland x fem!reader Anything Could Happen - Peter Sutherland x fem!reader Fallin' For You - Peter Sutherland x Reader

Shadow & Bone / Six of Crows

* Movement - Kaz Brekker x fem!reader Arms - Wylan Hendriks x male!durast!reader x Jesper Fahey

#fanfiction #fanfic #prompts #requests open #the night agent #peter sutherland #peter sutherland x reader #peter sutherland x you #peter sutherland fanfic #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker fluff #kaz brekker smut #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #shadow and bone #six of crows #soc #jesper fahey #wylan hendriks #wylan van eck #jesper x wylan x reader

[steponmeinejghafa]

Little Crow Pt. 1

Summary: The Crows (Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, and Matthias) find a lost child and kinda raise them as their own. So, a collection of scenarios where they all try and (sometimes fail) to parent you.

Six of Crows x Child!Ravkan!Reader

Age: 6

———

The afternoon sun beat down harshly on the streets, making its rays glint off blindingly from closed windows of the nearby buildings.

There you were, standing outside, alone and scared, lost in the streets of the Barrel. You’d managed to escape the slaver’s ship, and you were desperate to find food and shelter. Tears gushed down your cheeks as the sights and sounds overwhelmed you, and you backed away into an alley, unbeknownst to a watching figure nearby.

Kaz Brekker was not unfamiliar with the strangeness and frightening demeanour of the Barrel, so it was no wonder that he found a crying child in an alley, with nothing but the clothes on her back and not a penny to her name.

He limped towards you and tapped on you shoulder gingerly, “Excuse me, young lady, are you lost?”

You gasped and smacked his hand away, not knowing if he was a just being friendly or just a slaver in disguise. Kaz didn’t wince, simply smirked as he silently appreciated your fiery and vigilant spirit.

“Where are your parents, little one?” He asked, eyebrow raised.

“I—I don’t know,” you replied, about to burst into another flurry of tears. “I escaped from the ship, that’s all I remember.”

Seething internally, Kaz muttered to himself, “Damn slavers,” before looking at you with shockingly gentle eyes as he added in a slightly lighter tone, “Why don’t you come with me, I’ll give you some shelter and warmth for the night. Then you can be on the next ship back to…” he paused, unsure of where you were from.

“Ravka,” you corrected.

“Ah,” he nodded. “Your Kerch is very good, for a Ravkan,” he admitted as he let you hold his coat sleeve and walk with him back to the Crow Club.

“My mother was Kerch,” you said, feeling comfortable with this strange crippled man with a sour face. He gave you the vibe of a guarded, but well-intentioned person. “My father was a Ravkan translator for the foreigners who’d visit, so I know many languages!” You puffed your chest out with pride, earning a soft chuckle from Kaz.

“Interesting,” he said. “I didn’t catch your name, though.”

“I didn’t tell you my name,” you replied, frowning.

“Naturally. But if you’re going to stay with me for a while, we should get to know each other.” He replied, ushering you inside the club as you both arrived.

“You first,” you said, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I’m Kaz Brekker,” he said. “The owner of this club.”

“I’m…I’m Y/n L/n,” you replied, “The owner of nothing.”

He barked a laugh, something which didn’t happen often, and limped to his office, where he could offer you some peace and quiet.

“There’s a bed, and I can ask around for some clean clothes,” he offered. “You can go to the bathroom there and bathe while I do.”

“Thank you, Mister Brekker!” You smiled, running to the bathroom.

Inej, meanwhile, had crept in, soundlessly as usual, saying softly, “Seems like Kaz Brekker has a soft side.”

“Please,” he scoffed, rolling his eyes. “The child is here temporarily. I’m just offering her something which none of us got when we were alone in the world.”

“Like what, letting her sleep in your bed, bathe in your own bathroom, going out of your way to actually buy her clothes?” Smirked the Suli, placing her knives down.

“She escaped a slaver’s ship, Inej,” said Kaz. “It’s a wonder how she’s still alive.”

“She’s got the potential to be a Crow, wouldn’t you say?” Suggested Inej, crossing her arms across her chest. Seeing his stubborn face, she added, “Come on, we both know her parents are dead and she’s got no family to go back to.”

“And?” He replied, limping over to the door, calling for one of the worker boys and asking him to fetch some comfortable clothes for a child.

“She needs a family, Kaz,” the Wraith replied, following him. “Can’t we just do that? Can’t you?”

Kaz thought for a moment, and sighed, “Fine. But we’ll have to tell the other crows, too. Jesper, Wylan, Nina.”

“Nina is going to be thrilled,” said Inej. “Trust me.”

You came out of the bathroom, wearing one of Katz’s shirts which was long enough to be a dress for you, and your face dropped into an expression of intense vigilance again as your eyes landed on Inej and her knives which glinted in their sheaths.

“Mister Brekker,” you said, eyes wide with fear. “Who is she?”

“This is—“ Kaz began, but Inej cut him off with a hand.

“I’m Inej Ghafa,” she smiled, approaching you, hands up in surrender to show you she meant no harm. “I’m a friend of Kaz.”

“Oh,” you said. “You’re not a slaver’s friend then, right?”

Inej laughed and shook her head, “No, I’m not.”

The worker boy appeared at the doorway, panting as he held a paper bag in his hand. He handed it to Kaz, and scurried away, before he former handed you the bag.

“It’s something I figured you might like. My shirt cannot possibly be your only source of clothing,” said Kaz, his jaw set firmly as usual, but his eyes still held that same softness.

You accepted the bag with a happy little ‘thank you’, and pulled out a shirt with a pair of pants and suspenders, which made you laugh gleefully.

“It’s comfy!” You grinned after having run to the bathroom to put it on.

Another knock sounded at the door, making your face turn fearful again. What if the slavers had found you?

It wasn’t the slaver, as three bright and cheerful faces appeared at the doorway. Two males and one female.

The woman gasped and rushed towards you, before she had to take a pause to ask Inej, “Why’s her heart racing so fast?”

“She escaped from a slaver’s ship,” explained the Wraith. “Kaz seems to have gone soft, so he took her in.”

The woman nodded and waved her hands, slowing your heart rate down and calming you. A Heartrender? More importantly, a Grisha?

“Hi,” said the Grisha with a beaming smile at you. “I’m Nina Zenik. This is Jesper Fahey and Wylan Van Eck. We’re friends, don’t worry.”

The reassuring words and Nina’s smile kept you at ease, and you looked at Kaz, asking, “Why did Inej say you ‘took me in’?”

The man limped over to you and kneeled to your height, making sure not to put too much pressure on his bad leg, before saying, “How would you like for us to be your new family, Y/n?”

You thought about it for a moment, before asking, “You’re all going to take care of me?”

“Yeah,” nodded Nina.

“Absolutely,” said Inej.

You nodded and looked at Kaz, responding to his question, “I’d like that.”

“Well,” said the Zemeni-looking boy, “Welcome to the Crows, little one. Get ready for a life of madness, mayhem, and murder.”

“Do we beat people up? The bad people?” You asked with a big grin on your face, looking at Kaz.

“Oh yes we do, little crow,” he replied, smirking slightly.

“I don’t know this kid,” said Jesper with a grin, “But I love her already.”

#kidfic #sixofcrows #six of crows x child reader #found family #fluff #wholesome Kaz Brekker #leighbardugo #inej ghafa #Nina zenik #Jesper fahey #Wylan van eck

[starstruckwillows]

♡ she's an intellectual - j.f ♡

requested by 🦝<3

jesper fahey x scholar!reader, fluff

nobody can quite believe jesper's dating someone smart

jesper fahey was a gunslinger, a barrel bastard, a criminal, a legend, a grisha, a killer, a gambler, and many other titles he'd collected along the way.

he was also your boyfriend, who sat at the end of your bed like a petulant child that had been scolded, waiting for you to finish up with your work. you were surprised he hadn't started to whine.

"can you finish tomorrow? kaz will have my head if i'm gone for much longer."

you shuffled the papers you were bent over, marked with ketterdam university in the top corner, and answered, "jes, kaz will have your head regardless. you lost the thing already, five more minutes won't seal your fate more than that."

with no valid argument left to stand behind, he grumbled your own words back to you and sighed, shrugging off his coat.

"you're right. i might as well stay."

"sure."

you turned only moments later to see him half undressed and fully in your bed, guns left carefully on the table atop his hat.

such a ridiculous hat, really.

"that was fast."

"that's what she said."

"no."

looking back to your sheets, the ink still drying, you rolled your eyes. there was no more use for the charade, you both could've predicted your next actions with ease. folding away your diagrams, kicking off your boots, and climbing into the blankets with him.

"y'know, inej doesn't believe you're actually a student here."

you laughed, "i'm sure she'd be able to shadow me and find out."

"she's doing this thing where she respects my privacy."

"why doesn't she believe it?"

he paused for a minute, "they think you're too smart for me. scholarly type, barrel rat. not a proper match."

"that's not true. inej said that?"

"nina. they're only teasing, though."

"that's fine. as long as you know that."

he nodded and kissed the top of your head.

you yawned, preparing to shut your eyes and bask in his warmth, but he shifts beneath you and your head slips off his chest.

"jesper..." you groan.

"wait," he stretches above him, pulling something down from your shelf.

he hands you a book, "can you read it to me?"

and there's this hint of rare vulnerability in his voice, where he's not teasing or being offhand. sincerity. trust.

impossible to say no to, really.

"yeah, course i can." you shifted to sit straighter and open the book, while he dipped his head to rest between your neck and shoulder, hand creeping around your waist.

"you gotta explain the fancy words."

"i know, my love."

🏷️ — @anordinarymuse @ell0ra-br3kk3r @kingshitonly

#starstruckwillows #grishaverse #six of crows #jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey #fluff #jesper fahey fluff

[mcntsee]

Y/n: Can I copy your homework?

Wylan: I can help you with it!

Inej: Yeah, sure.

Nina: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.

Matthias: lol nope.

Jesper: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!

Kaz: *Read 5:55pm*

#incorrect quotes #kaz brekker x reader #six of crows #six of crows x reader #fluff #jesper fahey #nina zenik #matthias helvar #wylan van eck #inej gafha

[barbarianbookhoe]

Chapter 4

A/N: this is a mix between fluff, pining and a small mention of trauma, otherwise it's pure tension bc I wanted to show more of their private moments as a couple!

[Disclaimer: I don't know shit about bullet wounds, but I mentioned stitching it bc there was a blog that also mentioned stitching it to keep the skin together, for the skin not to scar so badly]

After Kaz brought her into the small cabin, he quickly went out to retrieve his cane and some first aid items. When he came back, he was a little disheveled as he put them on the table, and watched as Y/N slowly took off his coat from her shoulders, wincing when she accidentally moved the injured one. Kaz stepped closer to her, trying to figure out a way to help her, her wet skin making it difficult for him.

"I got it from here Kaz. Don't worry," She whispered, still shaking from the cold. Kaz looked at her with a mocking face. "Really? With one hand?" She sent him an annoyed look as she reached for a cloth to clean off the blood from the wound.

Kaz watched her struggle for a few minutes, before he stepped closer to take the cloth and help, but Y/N took the cloth away from his reach. "I said I got it,"

"I've heard it, I'm not deaf. It doesn't mean you can't use my help," He said sternly and it only made Y/N even more frustrated, as she tried to contain her emotions. "And you're an expert with wounds, since when?"

"Quit being a stubborn mule and let me do it," Kaz was starting to get frustrated too. He quickly snatched the cloth away from Y/N and deeply inhaled, bracing himself for the action.

Her still wet skin and clothes made it much more difficult for him to concentrate on the wound, insted of her cold flesh, which was threatening to take him back to a memory he hated to relive in her presence. Kaz felt the water nearing in on his waist, and he took a deep breath to steady himself. He also felt Y/N turning her body slightly away from him, to make the process more comfortable for him.

Before he could feel the water slowly burying his body again, he grounded himself by talking to the girl in front of him. When he finished with cleaning the wound, he looked at Y/N's now somewhat clean shoulder and swallowed thickly.

"Take off your vest and shirt. I can't take the bullet out like this." Kaz spoke on a quiet voice, then cleared his throat. "Not to mention you'll freeze to death in them," He turned around to give her some privacy, but Y/N spoke to him on a somewhat playful voice. "If you wanted me to take off my clothes you could've just asked,"

Kaz felt his heart drop to his ass. He was glad she couldn't see how flushed his face became at her words.

"You know that I don't ask for things. I steal them," Kaz said on a confident voice and heard Y/N hum behind him. "Is that a threat, Mr. Brekker?" She asked and gently tapped his ankle with her foot, to make him turn around. "It's a prom-"

The words died in his throat, as Kaz looked at Y/N's form. There were a few bruises forming on her lower ribs, where she was pulled down, but as soon as his eyes took in the bruise on her neck, Kaz felt like asking Nina to bring Oomen back from the dead, so he could kill him again.

Y/N noticed the murderous look in his eyes and took a step towards him. "These bruises will go away. I'm here, and I'm alive," She softly said and the sound made Kaz forget about the world outside for a moment. He looked at Y/N, then the wound on her shoulder, and began working.

Y/N hated bullet wounds. It wasn't enough to just stitch her up, her wound must be strongly poked to get the bullet out, then cleaned again, and only then could it be stitched. She hated the process. What she hated even more, was the fact that her darling partner was constantly asking her questions, making her talk when all she wanted to do was cry from the pain. She knew he used it as a mechanism for both of them, but she was one more second away from screaming.

She was gripping the edge of the small table and gritted her teeth. "Kaz, if you don't take that bullet out of me in the next ten seconds, I'll just fucking cut off my arm," She groaned and held the table tighter.

"Shame. A gunsmith needs both hands," Kaz replied and Y/N giggled, but the sound quickly died down in her throat, when suddenly a pain worse than before hit her shoulder, as she let out a groan.

"Just a few minutes," Kaz mumbled, but Y/N didn't quite hear it, because she was busy trying to muffle her scream. The pain was unbearable, and it only became worse when she felt Kaz put a new cloth on the wound, dipped in alcohol.

Y/N felt like her fingers were going to break any second from the grip she had on the table. Kaz pushed down on her shoulder, trying to keep himself steady, because Ghezen forbid he screwed up now. After a couple more minutes of groaning and wincing, Kaz slowly let go of Y/N's shoulder, inspecting it. When he found nothing suspicious, he cleaned it once more, before grabbing a thread and a needle to stitch it up.

Y/N stood still as Kaz tried to place his hands in a way least touching her skin, to keep it comfortable for both of them, but she felt the familiar thoughts flooding her. He doesn't want to touch me. He doesn't like to touch me. It's a burden to touch me. My skin is untouchable. My skin is disgusting. My scars are disgusting. My scars are-

"You stop that right now," Kaz said on a quiet, yet stern voice and it made Y/N slightly turn her head towards him. He was now standing directly next to her, so closely that if he wanted, he could've placed a kiss on her neck. On her scarred neck.

"Stop what?" Y/N asked, but little did she know what he was talking about. "Stop degrading yourself, just because I'm uncomfortable." He stared at her and then continued stitching her wound, "My unease has nothing to do with you, and everything with me. Don't lower your worth because I have a hard time adjusting to new things,"

"I know, but...old habits die hard," Y/N whispered as she watched Kaz bandaging her shoulder. She didn't even notice when he finished with her wound, but she was glad for it.

Kaz secured the fabric, but didn't pull away from her. Instead, he took a subtle, deep breath, and slowly began tracing her skin with his fingers. It started at her shoulder, then her collarbones, and eventually her neck, specifically her burn marks. Y/N most of the time forgot they were there, but when she didn't, she hated them. And no matter what form she took, the scars stayed. It made her irritated, sometimes to the point where she was contemplating slicing off her skin.

Kaz caressed her neck with such gentleness, that it made everything around Y/N melt. The room became warm all of a sudden, and she felt the tears forming in her eyes while Kaz looked at her with pure admiration on his face. He didn't let go of her as he came to stand behind her. He dipped his head and painfully slowly, left a feather light kiss on Y/N's scarred neck.

She became lightheaded as Kaz went to place another kiss on her skin. Then another. And another.

Then Kaz hesitantly placed a kiss on the side of her cold cheek, and waited for the nausea to hit him, but when it didn't came, he confidently leaned closer to the side of her face.

He lifted his hand and gently turned Y/N's head to him, just enough that their lips were half an inch away from each other. For a few moments, none of them did anything besides breathing and looking at each others lips. The silence didn't feel suffocating, it was a warm and comfortable feeling that embraced them.

Kaz wanted to take off his gloves. He felt proud for going this far with gloves on, doing it on a cold skin too. He felt himself get excited about what they were going to try next time, but it still made the leather on his hands burn his skin.

He craved touching Y/N without his gloves. He wanted to feel her skin under his fingers. He wanted to feel every scar, every uneven place on her. He wanted to feel her heartbeat under his hands.

He craved her in the most innocent way possible.

He wanted to be there for her, when she needed a shoulder to cry on. He wanted to be there when she needed a hug. He wanted to be able to hold her hand without even thinking about it. He wanted her to not worry about wether she should touch him. And most importantly, he wanted to kiss her whenever he wanted. Kaz thought about kissing her for the last two months. Placing kisses on every inch of her skin like it was the first drop of water after a drought, her hands, her arms, her neck, her cheeks, her forehead, her lips.

Kaz was sure that once he tasted those lips, even spending an eternity kissing her wouldn't satisfy him.

Y/N felt herself become warm all of a sudden, but didn't move from her place. If Kaz decided to kiss her, she would have to be a fool to stop him from doing it. She tiled her head just a little closer to him, and felt his breath get caught up in his throat. Their lips were almost touching, and just when Kaz was about to close that practically non-existent distance between them, there was a loud knock on the door.

"Wether you like it or not Brekker, I'm going to check on Y/N! Her heartbeat is basically sky rocketing, I don't want her to pass out," They both heard Nina's worried voice from outside.

Y/N felt Kaz step away from her to grab his cane, and she felt disappointment flowing through her. She closed her eyes for a second before letting out a small sigh. She thought it went unnoticed by Kaz as she watched him go over to the door, but before opening it, he looked back at her with sincere apology in his eyes.

"I packed some clothes in the bag while you weren't looking. Try to get some rest," He paused and then added, "For me, at least," He whispered and Y/N felt her heart stop for the hundredth time that day.

She softly smiled at him and nodded. "Only if you'll check on me later. You know I can't be trusted with knives in a room," She smiled even wider when she saw Kaz's lips turn into a grin.

Another knock came on the door, but before Nina could speak again, Kaz opened it and like it was just another day for him, he walked past a stunned Nina to the others on board.

When Nina went inside the cabin and turned to Y/N, and realized her shirt was missing, she let out a surprised giggle and smiled at the girl.

"Now I understand why your heartbeat sounded like you were going to pass out!" She exclaimed and Y/N stared back at her with an imitation of Kaz's murderous gaze.

"Nina honey, I need you to shoot me in the head," Y/N said casually and Nina erupted in laughs.

#grishaverse #shadow and bone #shadow and bone fanfiction #six of crows #kaz brekker #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker x fem!reader #kaz brekker x reader #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nina zenik #jesper fahey #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker fluff

[lady-ashfade]

Can you do a kazzle dazzle were kaz is like in love with reader while reader doesn't think so and all the crows tease him and stuff because its somewhat obvious to everyone but reader. And kaz like leaves her anonymous gifts. And then maybe a love confection at the end?

Sorry if your not taking requests

What gave me away?

Kaz brekker x Fem!Reader

I’ve seen so much like this and I just love it! I want kaz to gift me things.

Notes: Longest kaz fic of mine, like I haven’t wrote this much for one character in a while. You can be a crow in this, or just work at the club.

Warnings: Fluffy, cursing I think, teasing from the group, kaz being a little soft. Maybe some angst. Spelling mistakes.

His hooded eyes stared at her fingers as she washed to counter, moving them up he looks at her face. The face that he admired and couldn’t help but feel warm when he looked at her. She wear a dress, not too fancy or too boring. She worked the bar or help the kitchen at times, so she always got stains on her dress. She looked beautiful to him even now, messy dress and a little dirt on her cheek.

She had her lips pouted a bit and at whatever she was thinking about, he found it cute. He couldn’t help but do this often, he just feel in a trace. Kaz let his mind run to far that everyone there notice his absence mind. Smirking, Nina was the first to speak. “You got a bit of drool there, boss.” She leaned close and pointed to the corner of his lips but never touched him.

Kaz broke his trance and turned to her with a glare, “Excuse me?” She laughed and sat back into her boyfriend arms. “You’re partially ripping her clothes off in your mind. And not to mention your heart is acting weird, you wanna go talk to her?” She asked with a teasing small voice as if she was talking to a child.

He took a deep breath of annoyance and rolled his eyes. “She’s using the wrong rag, she should have switched it out a hour ago.” He stated to throw their thoughts off. Nina nodded but she didn’t believe it, no one at the table did. “I don’t know boss” Jesper tapped in, “You were giving her the eyes.” He moved his eyebrows.

“What eyes?” Kit had no clue what he was talking about. Jesper laughed and turned to wylan who already knew what to do. They stare at each other with big eyes and admiring their features, like a puppy. Nina giggled and hit the table, “He looks exactly like that!” Kaz groaned at their teasing, “Stop taking or you’re all out a job.” He grabbed his cane and stood up with it.

“No, boss don’t leave.” Jesper called out as they watch him leave, “Kazzel, we’re sorry.” Nina watched him leave. Once he disappeared they all looked at each other with big smirks. “He was totally drooling.” Jesper laughed. “Totally, now” she pulled out her coin purse. “Who wants to bet on them?” The table pitched in and were planning to get Inej in on it later.

//~//

His office was quiet and he could hear the sounds dying down as the club closed and the workers left, the only person left was you and the other crows. A knock at the door made his ears perk up, he knew who it was. “Come on.” His voice sounded light and low. You step through the door with a tray in your hand and carefully walked. “What have you brought this time?” He continued to write on the paper.

You smiled and walked over to him and set the tray on the table in the corner. “Well, get ready to eat a feast.” You giggle and picked up a big plate. He pushed his paper away, he learned that even if he wasn’t hungry you wouldn’t care. You placed the plate down in front of him and set down the  utensils he needed. “Cabbage rolls, with a small side of eggs. And my favorite, seasoned potatoes.”

He looked up at you, his eyes questioning you. “We didn’t serve these tonight.” You smiled and shrugged, “They just appeared out of no where.” You walked back over to the table to get the other things you brought him. “And you’d feed this to me not knowing if it was poison?” He grabbed the fork and poked the food, but he knew you had made it. “Maybe I want whatever you have stashed around here.”

He hummed and you came back over and set down a glass of water and a smaller plate, a sweet roll on top of it. He remembered when you found out he had a sweet tooth you always got him one, he hated someone knowing that. But if it was going to be anyone he was fine with it being you.

“You better drink the whole glass of water, and eat at least half of everything.” You dropped your eyelids and leaned on his decks. “If that’s all, leave me to it.” He looked back down. Your eyes glanced over a bit and your breath hitched. Nodding you picked up the tray and walked out of the room like he told you.

“You should stay, be with me for a while.” The words you always wished to hear spoke through your head in his voice. You knew kaz was closed off, he didn’t like to show anyone anything he didn’t have to. It was known that he cared about you and the crows…But you hoped he cared more, like you did him. Each night you glanced at him, when he would walk around the bar with a glare and looked like a angry dog. You hated yourself for falling for a man that couldn’t love you back.

The next day you walked through the alleyways as the fog still covered the streets, the sun coming up and the soft light shined. You did like the morning because the way you took, there was never many people. You got to hear the birds that nest around and you could hear yourself think. Entering the club you worked and smiled at the men that work the table set up, you went to the bar. As you got closer you noticed something on the table, a box wrapped in a ribbon that wasn’t there when you closed.

Curiosity got the better of you and you looked at the note attached to it and your eyes widen as you saw your name written. There was no other name or any hint as to who it could be. It could be some sort of bomb or a poisons animal, but sometimes you couldn’t let the wonders stay. So you took of the top of the box and saw a few cookie cutters and your heart stop as you pick one of them up. You remember them from the store you went by, you stayed about a hour just convincing yourself not to waste money.

You looked up to see if anyone was looking at you, if you could spot the person who gifted it but you saw no one. Smiling big you took the box and put it under the corner. Everyone noticed the whole day you were more happy and hopping around the place. Everyone was more alive to see you like that, and it made them feel happier. When Nina asked what you were so happy about, you told her about the gift. “Who got it for you.” She raised a cup to her mouth and then took a bite of her waffle. “No clue, it wasn’t signed.” She was stunned for a moment as you walked off. Then she remembered that your boss was aways interested in your smile, so she put the pieces together.

That was just the start of the weekly gifts that were on the counter when you entered the club. Sometimes it was a flower vase with your favorite flowers. Sometimes it was new baking equipment, others it was just small things you would look at in the market. Once your shoes broke at work and you had to finish the shift with no shoes. Then, a man came in with a new pair as the club closed and that was your final straw.

You needed to find the person. They always knew what you wanted or needed. At first you thought it would be Inej because she couldn’t be seen, but you asked her and she said no. You could tell when she was lying. You asked everyone and they all said no, but you never asked kaz. It wasn’t even on your mind but it you needed to cross every box off. So when you brought him his nightly meal you had the perfect opportunity to ask.

This time his sweet was a cookie in the shape of one of the cutters he had got you. He lightly smiled with his eyes because you had used it. “Kaz.” You set down the glass on his desk. He glanced at you and then back down for you to get the words out. You tried to control the sweat coming off your body and your heart from beating fast.

“I’ve been getting these gifts, and I have no idea who they are from.” He nodded his head and picked up some food with his fork. “And are they threatening?” You shook your head and bit your lips. “No, they are sweet actually. Who ever is sending them is actually paying attention to me.” You fumbled your hands.

“Is that all you wanted to say? Why tell me this?” He sound annoyed. “Because I wanted to know if..” you stoped and looked at him. He let a few seconds pass by and looked up at you as you went silent and frozen. “If?” He asked to get you to keep going.

You needed to just bite the bullet and ask him. Part of you wanted it to be him- No. All of you wanted it to be him. To know that he pays attention to you, noticing everything like you do him. “Are you sending them?” You let out a breath. He stopped for a minute and looked into your eyes, you noticed his lips slowly curl up into a smirk.

“What gave me away?”

That wasn’t what you thought you would hear. And you actually thought you imagined it for a minute. It made your mind fly with thoughts and it took you so much by surprise, you stop working for a moment. “So, it was you?” Your brows raised themselves but crunched, he loved that look. “Hmm, but I should have guessed you would have figured me out.”

It clinked into your brain, it made your stomach fill with butterflies and heart flatter. “So, why did you do it?” You smiled at him. “I like to see you smile. I needed to show you thatI think about you non stop but, i couldn’t say it to your face.” He was truthful. “I-” he took a deep breath and raised his hand slowly and put it above yours. You he had a problem with touch, and that he was working on it.

Before you could voice your opinion he place his hand on top of your softly, it fit over yours perfectly. It was warm and the leather felt nice. “I have these feelings for you, that I don’t know what to do with. But, I’d like to have you as mine.” You smiled wide and tried not to cry, so you giggled at the overwhelming feeling.

“I will be yours, Kaz Brekker.” He actually smiled for the first time, not a small one but a bigger one. You could tell he was trying for you and you couldn’t help but find it adorable, but you couldn’t voice it. “Now, eat up and I’ll be back in a few. I want you to tell me that again.” You pranced out his office like you owned the place and acted high and mighty.

He sighed and chuckled, shaking his head at how much you affected him. The only warmth he felt inside was thinking of you, or seeing you.

“I’ll be yours kaz brekker.” He would replay those words in his head until his last breath.

#kaz #kaz brekker x reader #six of crows x reader #six of crows #Nina Zenik #Jesper fahey #inej gafha #wylan van eck #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x fem!reader #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker fluff #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone #Kazzel dazzel

[notelcol]

Second vote is here! ❤️

Saving the character vote for the last one to try and make a chaotic story😆

So far we have shadow and bone as our winner fandom🫶(can’t lie I was a little surprised but I should have known the grishaverse is thirsty)

Thank you for voting! Keep an eye out for the next vote. Let’s see how interesting we can make this😝🌹

#shadow and bone x reader #writing #x reader #shadow and bone #six of crows #kaz brekker x fem!reader #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker fluff #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lanstov x reader #mal x reader #tolya yul bataar #tolya and tamar #tolya x reader #nikolai x reader #tamar x reader #zoya nazyalensky #zoya #jesper fahey #Jesper #wylan #wylan van eck #nina zenik #grishaverse #grisha netflix #grisha #inej ghafa