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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 8 months

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MORE Cute Spider Society Headcanons: Extracurriculars and Sports

Another list of headcanons I have about Spider Society and what it's like on campus. This time - Music, Sports, The Society Newspaper, and other fun things to do on campus

Heads-up: There's light mentions of Spidersonas below - including my own lovely Disco-Spider Diane. All creators tagged at the end

[This post has a lot of links in thise - ALL lead to other tumblr posts. Most of them explain callback jokes, additional headcanons, or the information about the Spider-person being named. All the Spider-people mentioned here are free-to-use headcanons, unless otherwise named. Those who are actual Spider-sonas that my Spider-sona knows - their first names maybe used, or their sona introduction will be linked. Basically if their normal name isn't given and/or theres no link, have at it]

LETS GO

The Spider Music Scene goes CRAZZZYY

Thought it was just Hobie?

Of course not! There's MetroSpider too

In fact there's a whole wide range of accompanying 'Spider-*music genre*'

There's Spider-Goth who plays gothic death metal, DiscoSpider who plays funky pop, Spider-Grunge into 90's garage grunge, RrrriotSpiderrr who plays Riot Girl Grunge

There's even SpiderSync

Which is NYSNC. But they're all Spider-people. Like Justin Timberlake as Spider-man. They roam as a group

That's because Metro isn't the only celebrity Spidey either -

There's SpiderB, which is just Beyonce but a Spider-person. Britney Spiders, which is Britney Spears but a Spider-person. Doja-Spider, Doja Cat. You get the gist.

Like imagine being in the Spider Society campus food court and turning around to see BEYONCE

And she's like 'yes.. It's me'

and it's literally just like the normal Beyonce with albums and everything excepts shes also Spiderwoman

And gay. And has a rapper wife named Jane-Z

Every year there's a collaborative album from all the musical Spiders

Called 'The Yearbook'

A lot of the songs are about the direct struggle or experience of being Spider-people

With some really good party songs thrown in for the Spider-raves

Hobie and Gwen's band Wicked Webs appears on the album, along with any Spider who plays an instrument.

If your spidersona can carry a tune, they're on it.

AND IT'S FIRE

You can buy the album at the Commissary.

The first week at campus EVERYbody is playing it. In the common rooms or the food court or training rooms -

They'll just play this album that's by Spider-people for Spider-people

If your spidersona starts singing ANY part of a 'Yearbook' song some without a doubt will respond with the next lyric. everybody knows the words

Spidey people really treat Hobie like a rockstar - and a lot of them go to his concerts

It's kinda a huge unspoken thing on campus that a LOT of people are willing to break rank and head to 136 without permission, just to see Hobie on Saturday nights.

Even people who don't hang with Hobie or don't necessarily know the real him

They still go cause his shows are THE PLACE to be.

Spider-people pour into his tiny venues in London, all out of uniform, and they mingle with the punks in the crowd while Hobie goes Miguel Mode on stage

It's a place where they can all drink (if over 18) and party (any age, Hobie gotchu ur safe with him) and enjoy themselves

And as a result, Hobie is a HIT with people from his universe

They know that Hobie's shows are always lit and full of cool people you'll never see anywhere else

The after-parties are CRAZY (party on all six walls), and it's really common for Spider-friends to link up and head to each others universes after the show - getting into their own shenanigans

There's MANY times Ansi, Asa, Hobie, and Diane have gotten themself into some shit while lit after one of Hobie's shows

And every Monday people are talking about what they get into after the show, the crazy stuff that popped off in the after-parties

MetroSpider, Pavi, Diane, Hobie, & Margo throw the BEST parties

Miguel knows about this, and he lets it slide - for the sake of morale (and not causing a riot if he banned it)

There's an international Spider community on campus

You thought Spiderman India and Spider-UK was it? NO

Spider-Canada and Hobie are other noticeable ones , but there's more!

There's the Peruvian 'IncaSpider' named Moche, a Paris born SpiderFrance, a SpanishSpider, SpiderItaly

A Mahayana Buddhist ThaiSpider, VietSpider, Spiderwoman Brazil. The list goes ON AND ON.

There's a large group of Indigenous Spider-people

Some Spider-people are even born in countries that don't exist in most universes or live in universes that live in countries that USE to exist

My favorite international Spider-person is the Australia Spider-person who is simply named Australian Spider

People constantly joke they're no dangerous than the average Australian Spider

And there's also a Spider Olympics!

And the events are DESIGNED for superhumans

Diving from buildings into swimming pools, Track meets where people are running at like 80mph, Web Gymnastics, Contact Sports

Ice Hockey gets REAL intense - and of course SpiderCanada is a team captain

As does Roller Derby. Wanna see superhumans fucking WRECKING each other? Go watch Spider-Derby, the players have derby names that play off their own Spider-names. So it's like a triple identity.

And once a year, they all throw down - and even if you aren't THE Spider of your nation, you can still participate if you want -

Like Hobie can enter for Britain but he'd rather die than do anything for that country

It's the one place you can compete and fully push your spider powers without danger - plus it's with your friends

They do give out medals. But it's mainly bragging rights.

Pavi earned his first gold medal in the diving portion for India only three months after his bite. Which is a record for The Society

However the Spider-person with the highest number of medals is Lego-Spider-man. I don't know how.

Sports are HUGGGEEEE on campus I cannot stress this enough

Everyone knows The Society LOVES baseball (shoutout @theevoh12)

But they also love football too (European - not American)

The Society also has TWO soccer teams that constantly play against each other

They play 4 wall soccer in which the field extends the length of a room, up the walls, and across the ceiling - leaving two walls for spectators. This is usually just called 4wFootball or 4WF

This is played with extended rules - and a modified ball that can stick and roll along walls

MANY people on Society backs one of the teams.

And before a game there WILL be arguments without a doubt

You DO NOT insult someones 4WF

You can get team jerseys in the Commissary

WebSlinger Patrick O'Hara is Captain on one team. No, the horse does not play

(I want a jersey with Patrick's 4wFootball number)

Imagine being a Spider Society Athlete and seeing other superhumans wearing your jersey and giving you thumbs up - WHOLESOME

Games can be played 'Plain' or 'Full'

A 'plain' game of 4wFootBall uses basic spider abilities such as speed, strength, and reaction time - however special abilities are not allowed

A 'full' game of 4wFootBall uses basic spider abilities as well special abilities and passive tactics. If Mile wants to go invisible in a 'full' game - that's permissible

Miguel's venom is NOT however. Can't be paralyzing other players. Abilities that effect the other players are off limits, so no electro powers

'Plain' games are played out-of-suits, in team uniform

'Full' games are played in-suits, with the team uniform over it

Betting on teams and players is against the rules

But also Lyla runs an underground betting system and fantasy 4wfootball league. Don't tell Miguel.

There's other activities with solo athletes, and like Hobie being a famous rockstar on campus - there are star athletes too

Tennis is a huge one. Volleyball too. With an extra long field.

The serves, spikes, and hits can be genuinely dangerous. They're managing swings and hits that can top out at like 110 mph (just above the world's fastest baseball pitch)

But because everyone are Spider-people, its fairly easy to follow in real-time

Star-Spiders are usually tennis players, gymnasts, weightlifters, and track stars, but there's a couple others too.

Pavi is a star gymnast, swimmer, AND A 4WFOOTBALL PLAYER - he goes REALLY hard at extracurriculars

(And he's surprisingly competitive. Like insanely competitive. Pavi will scream at the top of his lungs cause he scored a goal. He loses a game and as soon as they end the game he wants to practice cause he HAS to win next time)

The boy is a perfectionist.

One thing that's SO annoying is Venom Evaluation Checks

If you come in acting weird, too bold, or uncharacteristically agressive - You get sent to Spider-psyche so they can make sure you don't have venom.

Not my fault. Raimi-Peter (from the Raimi movies) pulled up to HQ one day in all black and started dancing all weird and saying cringy shit like 'Now dig on this'

And Jess was immediately like "Yeah, no. We're not digging on anything, sir."

There's a newspaper you can write for

Spider-Scrawl is the Editor-in-Chief of The Daily Web who is a GREAT boss by the way

And it's a MUCH better gig than working at The Bugle

So if your spidersona has worked for Jonah - submit a resume, you might get a call

Theres things like a Canon Event Advice Column, which Diane writes for

A news section that details the Craziest News across the multiverse

If your Doc Ock pulls some crazy shit and turns into a giant octopus - oh yeah thats going Front Page. Everyone on campus knows and you get to gloat about fighting a giant octopus

There's a Debate Section that updates with hot topics that only exist between Spider-people like:

'Is it okay to genetically replicate another Spider-persons organic webbing so you can recreate it for your mechanical webslingers?'

'Masks: Hair out or No? Spider-man India and DiscoSpider weigh in'

'Is the Go-Home machine ethical?'

'What's Miguel's favorite flavor of empanada?'

As you can imagine, these coversations across campus can get REALLY heated

There's a lot of entertainment

Yes, there's a movie theatre on campus. They play movies from across the Spider-verse, and they're a GREAT way to see versions of films you know - but different.

Watch GhostBusters except it's from WebSlinger's world and everyone is cowboys and they catch the ghosts with lassos

Other hits are shown on the big screen too

Barbie was a HUGE hit on campus. People coming in with pink outfits OVER their suits

And it's really cheap in terms of credits

So people like Gwen who started out living on campus, or who are apart of the Educational Study Program have nice things to do in their off-time

And, The Food Court is THE BEST

You think they only have empanadas - think AGAIN

Every culture, every time period. Even weird ass food that you wouldn't even want but is a staple in other universes.

They even have a FISH N CHIPS SHOP (Malala loves it there)

So Hobie can get his nasty ass beans on toast without leaving HQ

The Food Court is almost as big as the Training Wing, and there are so many places indoor and out to eat lunch

And it doesn't stop there -

There's a store (based on credits not money) and a general kitchen.

(As well as separate kitchens in each dorm wing)

You know how in SpyKids they have those meals that like GROW to full size in the microwave???

Guess what NUEVA YORK HAS THAT MY FRIEND

Missing McDonalds or a specific chain? - Just go to the Grocery in HQ and get a capsulized happy meal.

It grows to fill size in the expanders in the kitchen

Just pick the meal, put it in the expander, dip your ID card, and BOOM

Olive Garden with breadsticks on the side, Waffle House Waffles, McDonalds WITH international food options

Plus the grocery is fully automated by Lyla so you don't have to talk to people if you don't want to

But she will see all the nutter butters and pringles you pick up and she will judge you for it - it's between you and her but she's judging you

Miguel wants members to actually like the place he made

Because he finds no point in having unhappy, unsupported, unstable Spider-people out in the field -

He wants them at their happiest and healthiest so he tries his best

And he hardly partakes in any of this, but to him that's fine. It's not suppose to be for him.

He does enjoy seeing a full food court or walking by the training rooms and hear all the sessions going on

Hearing people talk about the new movie on campus

And sometimes you can even catch him humming a song from 'The Yearbook'

Imagine how smug Hobie was when he went 'bruv - are you tapping out my guitar notes rn?? you thinking about my song?'

Miguel can never live it down

Miguel DOES follow 4WFootball though -

He is actually one of the coaches for 4WFootball - he's a GREAT coach. Hardheaded ass fuck sometime but GOD he loves the Spider's on his team they're his favorites but he tries not to show it

And finally -

Yes there's a nursery and kindergarten on campus, specialized for Spider-kids regardless of if they have powers.

Peter doesn't let MayDay run free (all the time). MayDay attends the Itsy Bitsy Spider Daycare, and so will Jess's child

Sometimes while walking around HQ, you'll see little toddlers in single-file lines, holding lunch boxes as they follow Spider-Teacher on a field trip to another universe - to learn about the wonders of the multiverse

Their favorite trip is to WebSlinger's world, all the kids get to be cowboys and Patrick shows them ponies and lets them feed his horse Widow

There's a breakroom for people the multiple Spider-Teachers, Spider-Professors (Educational Program), Spider-Psyches, Spider-coaches, the list goes on and on

(Though Society Administration like Jess, Ben Reilly, and yes - Hobie (don't ask how hes just that good) have a separate breakroom from the educators and coaches and such )

And those breakrooms are funny as HELL It's like the Office back there.

This is really long :) Here's a photo of Hobie

Bye.

_________________________

ALSO ALSO ALSO : All the people, OCs, and other things I mentioned -

Ansi - by @spidey-bie Asa - by @suchholydebauchery Disco-Spider Diane - by ME @theevoh12's amazing baseball concept Spider-Scrawl by @whaliiwatching

Thanks for making HQ so rad!!

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cairavende · 1 month

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Worm Arc 18 thoughts:

Well that sure just happened

I'm fine

Noelle ate my daughter. But I'm fine. It's fine.

Her girlfriends are gonna save her!

I'm fiiiiine

Anyway, that's like, the end of the arc so there's a lot of other stuff that happens!

Taylor casually drops that she's mostly blind in conversation and Brian kinda freaks out. Understandably.

She got eye drops that she is supposed to be doing but never mentions doing them. I'm very disappointed in her. I'm also worried her eyes aren't going to ever get better.

I do love that the moment Dinah says she only has a 58% chance of going home and Taylor realizes it's because of her, she forces the situation by taking Dinah home right away. She is far from perfect, but she does have her moments.

RACHEL LET DINAH PET HER DOG!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! LOOK AT THE GROWTH!!

One of my favorite lines, when Taylor asks Dinah the chance of trouble before they go into the medical clinic "When there's trouble, it's you. Eighty percent of the time." Just, kinda embodies the spirit of Worm I think.

I'm still fine.

Taylor sure thinks about Rachel as Rachel a lot now, instead of mostly as Bitch. GAAAAAY.

I really want to know what's on those papers Dinah left for Taylor. Triumph saw them but didn't seem to react. One might have been a message for him, since Dinah would know he would see it. Something that will come into play later maybe.

I love Parian making a giant wiener dog for everyone to ride on. Like, it is a definite upgrade in transportation from "door with glass stuck in it dragged down the street" but it doesn't have much of a supervillain vibe to it.

Noelle just starts it off with grabbing possibly the strongest cape available in Brockton Bay. At a minimum, one of the most versatile to clone. No big deal. Not like even just normal Vista could become very dangerous if she wanted to be evil.

Freaking PRT all "this is a Class A instead of a Class S cause Eidolon is a big man baby and needs to punch something all on his own to prove he's strong". Sure are helping people Alexandria. Good job. What a hero.

I think Eidolon is Bargain Bin Scion. Scion Lite. Blue Light Special Scion. A shitty version of Scion created by Cauldron basically.

Clockblocker is so fucking fascinated with Skitter it's amazing.

Tattletale made Eidolon maaaaaad! I love her.

I'm perfectly fine.

The scene with meeting the Chicago Wards, oh god I loved it so much! Skitter tells Bitch to clear the plywood out of a window and she just instantly fucking kicks it open, then a giant swarm comes in and swirls around everyone and covers Skitter, making her hair move and trailing bugs behind her like a gown, and then starts speaking with the swarm. And Tattletale waits until the perfect moment before asking the Wards their names and powers, very clearly backing Skitter up as her 2nd. Just such a "ok I was playing nice but now I need you to know who you are working with!" power move. Fucking amazing. Also it was Skitter being assisted by Bitch and Tattletale! GAAAAAAAAAAAY!! LESBIAN SUPERVILLAIN POWER POLYCULE!

I think Grace has neat powers but could have been more creative with her name. I fucking love Tecton though, assume tinker. Dude has got to love fights like this, where he is allowed to do all the property damage he wants. He'd make a good villain.

The other two are kinda neat too but they didn't last very long.

Every time they are going anywhere Bitch specifically offers Skitter a ride. GAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!

I love seeing the range of power adjustments the clone Vistas get. Some are pretty basic - can do stuff from farther away or not be slowed down if a lot of people are around - but then we get ones like Paper Mario Vista and Imagine Dragons Vista, with much more wild powers.

Everyone stand back while Eidolon goes and shows us all how strong he is! God.

I'm 100% FINE.

Side effect of being blinded probably, but it is neat how good Taylor is getting at listening, and sometimes even seeing, through her bugs! Just listening in on Eidolon and Noelle from blocks away.

Imp almost gets crushed to death by Eidolon's gravity power cause she ignores warnings from Skitter to run. Sounds about right.

Noelle making rat clones and bug clones (that Skitter can't control) is fun.

Fucking projectile vomit attack suddenly! Did Noelle absorb the girl from the Exorcist??

Texas Wards kinda getting their ass kicked. (Also what the hell is going on in Texas that the whole state apparently just has the one Wards team, vs most places have a Ward team per city?)

Fight is going kinda poorly. Travelers show up to help! And then Trickster betrays everyone to feed my daughter to Noelle! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm fine.

The Most Powerful Man in the World Interlude thoughts:

Scion just really is empty in there isn't he?

Not a person, just a construct of the entities in 3 dimensional space. Sphere moving through Flatland and being seen as a circle style. No mind, just does what this guy tells him.

Duke is a very good dog.

Kevin talking about Scion 100% sounds like someone talking about a lover that has been lots of trouble for them but that they just can't quite.

Lisette is having a weird day.

I really wonder how the next Endbringer attack is going to go now that Scion has been told to kill them. Wonder if it'll be different.

Crusader Interlude thoughts:

Shockingly, it turns out that the Nazi is an asshole. News at 11.

Night and Fog were basically constructed by this Gesellschaft group. Seems like a branch of Cauldron pretending to be Nazis for more control over things. Or maybe not directly a branch of Cauldron, but they get powers from Cauldron. Maybe not related, but they make weapons, which is very much what Cauldron can do, and we haven't seen anyone else yet reliably make powers with control over the outcome.

This poor TA is having a bad day.

Taylor triggered 2 or more times in that locker. I was 100% positive of that the second the TA said "You can’t really distinguish a single trigger event from having two in quick succession." I probably should have realized this earlier.

Really curious where Theo and Aster's stories are going. I could see one or both of them being a major part of the end of the world (based on stuff from Trickster's visions on stuff from Noelle's interlude I'm thinking a 3rd or 4th generation cape might play a part in it), but I could also see them being red herrings.

Theo is upset but realistically getting abandoned and left with the PRT is the best option that could have happened to him.

Jessica Yamada Interlude thoughts:

This poor woman

Faultline Interlude thoughts:

OH MY GOD Gregor and Shamrock are super fucking cute together!!!!

Faultline is amazing and very organized and detail oriented and an assertive leader who wears a dress shirt with slacks and cowboy boots and threatens to get a bullwhip and I would really like her to tell me what to do k thx.

Not positive I would trust the minor precog abilities of Shamrock to make me Simurgh proof, but it's better than nothing.

The quarantine zone of the city of Madison is doing great!

Wasn't expecting to get to see Matroyshka again, that's neat! She should probably stop eating people but otherwise she's fun.

Faultline just not being able to stand Tattletale is wonderful. I hope they bother each other for years to come.

I like this crew, so I was not happy that they got really fucked up by Contessa. But I also want to like Contessa (as much as I can like someone who works for Cauldron) and this did make her seem really badass.

Noelle Interlude thoughts:

I'm fine.

Regent keeping up the jokes under pressure, good for him.

Finally got some good descriptions of Noelle's powers doing stuff which was very good.

I'm fine.

Also fun to see various clones and their powers.

AND THE VISION! OH MY GOD THE VISION! So much good info from that. It helped me get a much better idea of things and confirmed a lot of things I already thought. (Like Cauldron has basically hijacked an entity, more or less. Not the details on how though.)

I'm fine.

The fact that Noelle can let the god dandruff take control is interesting. Like her connection never got fully closed compared to other people. Which is what I assumed only taking half a vial did. Really curious to see if we ever get more info on Oliver.

Her Earth Bet self is like, 15 years younger. But still has the same name. Kinda wild.

I'm fine.

Also her Earth Bet dad gave her the name Echidna, which like, I get it's the mother of monsters or whatever, but I can only think of the cute adorable little creature!

I'm fine.

I obviously wish Eidolon had been able to defeat Noelle and save my daughter but him having a big sad about it not being fair that he can't get stronger is pretty funny too. I do not like the guy.

I'm fine.

I'm sure Tattletale has a plan and everything will work out.

I'm fine.

I'm 100% absolutely fine.

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