#jj maybank x reader angst

[voidpetrova]

a little less lonely — jj maybank x reader

part 2 can be found here

☄. *. ⋆ content warning(s) & genre: swearing, alcohol consumption, adultery mentioned, rebounding, one-sided feelings, explicit sexual content under the cut: unprotected sex, creampie, tit play, overstimulation, squirting — angst, smut

˚♡ ｡˚ synopsis: what better way is there to heal a broken heart than over-complicating things with just a few glasses of wine to start things off?

✧.*

things had never been so complicated. under any normal circumstances, people found themselves drawn in by the beauty of the carolina coast. so eager to strip themselves of their everyday stress, all they seeked was a temporary sense of peace—an artificial promise that everything would be alright. maybe not right then and there, because all those problems found a way out the minute sunny, warm skies and salty waves came into the picture. the people were friendly, despite the tension. the food was great, as was the company. there was no better example of the perfect place.

however, bad luck had a way of clinging to those who found themselves with no way out, not even on earth's paradise.

you were never able to figure out where it all went wrong with john b. no matter how many hours you spent thinking about it, let alone distracting yourself from it, you failed to point out where exactly the bridge began to shake. the possibilities were endless. did it have anything to do with sarah's sudden presence amongst the group itself? did it have anything to do with growing tensions between him and rafe? he could've been drained, you could've just grown apart. in the end, he offered no explanation when he chose to end things with you. it was a swift, clean cut.

to be frank, you were feeling quite zen with the entire situation. despite having spent two full years with him, it truly didn't affect you as much as you expected. if you were asked about it two years ago, you'd have thought your life would fall apart. when the moment finally came, you accepted it with a gracious heart, no matter how much you truly yearned for him. you loved him, there was no denying it, but you knew you had no say in the decisions he made. you knew that from the second you met him.

you found yourself in front of his doorstep, offering a few quiet knocks to the wooden door. up until that point, he had returned a two full boxes of a few of your personal belongings he had grown to collect throughout your relationship. a third box with your name on it was waiting for you, just on the other side.

when the door opened, you found yourself face-to-face once more. you offered him a kind smile, gazing up at him. it was impossible to read his expressions, to tell what and how he was feeling. perhaps stoic, maybe sympathetic, even. his eyes were almost soulless, despite the smile he returned.

“hey,” you broke the silence, clasping your hands together. “you have the box, right?” he showed no interest jn accompanying your dialogue, offering only a small nod in response before turning on his heel, heading towards the box. you bit your lip, as if ashamed for giving in so fast, it definitely chipped away at the zen you were feeling just a few minutes prior. thankfully enough, your thoughts didn't offer much consolation for long. loud, angry, familiar voices pierced your ears, you couldn't help but turn in the direction of the source.

the last person you had expected was to see jj, someone you had spent a good portion of your life dating despite the messy ending. you had spent a decent five years with him, no matter how bad the last few months were. he was somewhat of a childhood best friend, with the two of you growing up in the same area, both of your fathers being best friends. after a while, perhaps just before puberty, you grew distant, but when the growth spurts finally hit, you were inseparable. he was your first boyfriend, and you were his first girlfriend. you had gone through so much together, teaching each other the rights and wrongs of a relationship, and you truly expected it to last. everybody did. all of that joyous hope went to waste when he met kiara, leading to the ultimate decision of throwing five years in the water for a cheap one-night stand, which eventually led to a serious relationship over the course of a few days. needless to say, no matter how angry and heartbroken it left you, you remained civil—for everybody's sake.

much like every other day, he wasn't alone. you squinted your eyes amidst the sun's beaming rays, making out kiara's frame trailing behind him, down the stairs of the house's front porch. there was all too much screaming from her side, frantic arm waving, long strings of curses. however, jj wasn't hesitant to retort. you couldn't tell what the argument was about, but the way he stormed off and climbed into the white, worn-out travel van could only tell you one thing—whatever they had going on, was over.

you turned around once again, only this time, returning john b's stare. he had come back, arms wrapped around the box. you didn't know how long he had been standing there, you were more focused on the way the top of the box was sealed shut, your name written atop in big, black letters. “damn, at least we aren't acting like them.” it was your subtly unsubtle attempt to lighten the mood, but no matter how subtle you could be, all john b responded with was a shrug—before closing the door, right in your face.

it wasn't necessarily a feeling of defeat, as much as it was a sign that you needed a glass of wine in your system as fast as possible.

when the sun had finally set, the moonlight gladly took its place, casting shadows alongside your trailer park. you were sat on your dining room chair, a bathrobe hugging you warmly as you crossed your legs, admiring the bottle of cheap wine calling your name. there really wasn't much negotiating needed to win you over—you found yourself reaching for the bottle before you even began thinking about it. maybe that was all you really needed for the zen to reach its full potential.

all that potential may as well have gone to waste when you heard the doorbell ring, a feeling of unease settling. nonetheless, no matter how ticked off, you clutched the front of your bathrobe tightly as you treaded toward the door. “who is it?” you called out, once in front of the door. a sigh was heard at first, but you didn't know what to expect anymore. perhaps john b, perhaps another one of your friends coming in to offer their condolences.

“it's your ex-boyfriend!” the familiar voice practically chirped. of all the unexpected guests you could have had, this one really took the cake. you rolled your eyes as you hesitantly reached for the doorknob. “jj, what do you want?” you were taken aback once you opened the door, taking a step back when you got a good look at jj, two suitcases by his side and a bag slung over his shoulder. he offered you a friendly smile, accompanied by an almost nervous wave.

“you saw the shitshow today, i presume,” he let out a nervous laugh, free hand reaching to scratch the back of his neck. “kiara and i just broke up.”

maybe your conscience truly was getting the best of you, or maybe you were healing. whatever it was, it made you sympathize with him. no matter what the past stated, you couldn't help but return the smile, opening the door just a little bit more as you stepped aside. you knew they've had their fair share of arguments, but you never really expected them to break up. not yet, at least. “oh, well, come on in.”

his gratitude wasn't immediately evident, not as much as his shock. he expected many things, from more yelling to bag-throwing and even hissy fits, but not any acts of kindness.

in no time, you found yourself in his company, right on the chair next to you, and it was time to crack the bottle open. he couldn't help but laugh, seeing you so eagerly fiddle with the corkscrew. it wasn't in a taunting matter, despite the look you shot him, but rather in pale admiration. you had poured yourselves each a glass as you brought your knees back up to your chest, awaiting further explanation from him.

“sorry to come over on such short notice, but i couldn't face going to a motel.” you raised an eyebrow, shooting him a playful look. “that's okay,” you murmured in response, tracing the shape of your glass before leaning it in for another sip. “is there a reason you're crashing here and not at john b's?”

he shrugged, clasping his hands together quietly as he stared into his glass, watching the ripples and bubbles the pale yellow liquid provided. “didn't feel like dealing with his shit today,” he licked his lips as he paused, eyes flickering between you and the glass, as if hesitant. “also, sarah was with him. didn't feel like dealing with her shit either.” the unexpected mention of her name sent a sharp twinge in your chest, and you couldn't help the silent feeling of defeat from pressing into your chest. jj definitely noticed it, his following look all too sympathetic as he watched you down the rest of your wine.

“am i allowed to ask what happened?” you finally broke the silence, head tilted to the side as you locked eyes once more. he laughed, but there was nothing funny about it. “you could ask, but i won't tell.” you quirked an eyebrow up, his tactics all too familiar as you shot him a look of disappointment.

“why not?”

“'cause it's embarrassing.”

“jj, did you cheat again?”

“no,”

“did she cheat?”

“nope,”

“you finally saw her without any makeup?”

it was his turn to shoot a disapproving look of his own, but neither of you could hold back the laughter that followed. despite it all, he shook his head, signalling that the break-up truly must've been something much deeper. “are you okay?” this was the first of your questions that was truly genuine. he nodded, once more. “yeah,” he responded, grabbing ahold of the bottle, filling your glass up alongside his. “it hadn't been working for quite a while. this was inevitable.”

you knew exactly what he meant by that, exactly what he was talking about. it was as if you, too, had sensed quite a while ago that a bad ending was written in the stars for you and john b. “well, these days anybody going through a break-up gets my sympathy.”

jj clicked his tongue before taking another swig of the wine. truly, he had been used to beer up until this point. the taste of grape brought back memories—how you would always have a bottle or two in your fridge while you were together. “that's right,” he responded, leaning back in his chair. “i heard johnnie boy lost feelings.” despite how painful it felt hearing everybody's thoughts out loud, you couldn't help but laugh bitterly. “no, johnnie boy lost love. found it somewhere else.”

it wasn't supposed to be a personal attack on jj's behalf, but the shoe definitely fit. his eyes were filled with a sorrow you never sought to uncover, guilt tugging at his heartstrings. “so, there will be no gloating from me.” you proudly continued, shooting him a smile as you raised your glass. he returned the smile, clinking away with his own glass. “well, here's to no gloating.”

you had explained to him that you were trying to keep a positive outlook on the whole thing, no matter how much it ate away at your pride. you talked and talked, and all he wanted to do was listen. “i even started writing last night,” you continued, downing what was left in what was definitely your fourth glass of wine. “and, well, i think there's a potential book in there.”

he couldn't fight off the pride he felt for you. “a book, really?” you nodded, the last of the bitter juices coating your tongue. “about all my failed relationships.” jj laughed appreciatively.

“you're not writing about me, are you?” he teased, earning him nothing but a humorless retort. “please, you're like the first fourteen chapters.” he grinned, even though he knew what was awaiting him.

“are you gonna be fair?” he asked teasingly. you nodded, just an edge of irony to your words. “i'm gonna be honest.” he feigned a worried sigh at your response, offering a displeased look, “i was afraid of that.”

it was nice to finally get some things off your chest, it was nice having someone to talk to, even if it was your ex-boyfriend. it felt like time was flying, and everything that had been bothering you up until then disappeared. “give me your glass, gotta finish this bottle off,” he insisted, gesturing toward what was left of the bottle, but you couldn't. shouldn't, really. “no way, jj, four glasses is my limit.” you made a weak, tipsy attempt at snatching the bottle away, but he was two steps ahead of you, pulling it away and coming to face you, as if he had a business proposition.

“if you help me finish off this bottle, i'll tell you what happened between me and kiara.” he was good, really good. you couldn't resist it, perhaps his story would provide at least some consolation. “hit me.” and so, he did.

you sipped away at your fifth glass of wine, ignoring the way your mind went fuzzy as the taste overwhelmed your senses once again. once jj had seen how dedicated you were, he smiled. “kiara was making the bed, and found a picture i kept under the mattress,” you shot him a look of surprise as you brought the glass back up to your lips. “a picture i didn't want her to see.”

“what kind of picture?” you questioned, a genuine edge of curiosity to your tone. your first guess would have been some sort of dirty magazine. your only guess, really, but kiara never seemed like the type to make such a big fuss over that. jj lowered his gaze along with the empty glass, only to lock eyes with you, once more.

“it was a picture of you,” he finally admitted. “it's something i like to take a look at every now and then.”

you didn't know how to respond. for the first time in a long time, jj had left you speechless. your reaction wasn't negative by any means, as much as shocked. you could only utter out a small “wow,” with truly nothing else to say. your eyes remained locked as you stared at the man you had once loved more than anyone else in the world, the same one that had truly messed you up in the long run. despite all of it, you harbored no hatred toward him whatsoever. not even to the extent where you found him leaning in, something you would've definitely pushed him away for. the only problem was that you didn't push him away, you found yourself returning the kiss.

however, you were the first to pull away, vision blurry as you both filled each other's ears with drunken laughter. “what the hell was that?” your tone was all but stern. jj leaned back once more. “that was something i've been wanting to do for quite some time.”

you couldn't help but roll your eyes at the stupid sentiment, despite the shared laughter. “oh, that's just you rebounding from kiara.” he shrugged, although he knew it was far from the truth. “so, you're on the rebound from johnnie boy. no harm, no foul.”

what really tipped the scale of morality for you was the fact that you truly had nothing against his proposal. you let out a sigh, “jj, it would be so weird.” he was quick to cut you off before you could rest your case. “we're two old friends who suddenly find themselves single, nothing weird about us helping each other out to be,” he paused, as if trying to find the write words. “a little less lonely.”

resisting would have been the appropriate thing to do. whether the answer was to push him back or pull away, the right thing would've been to resist. it wasn't right, no matter how good it felt or how familiar his touch was, it was morally wrong. it was wrong to use each other, it was wrong to go behind john b's back, just as kiara's. they were your friends. jj was your friend. it didn't matter, because neither of you resisted.

your mouths melded together, creating an all too familiar intimate connection, the air crackling with intensity. you couldn't help but succumb to his magnetic pull, allowing him to weave his fingers into your soft locks of hair. “shit, jay,” you exhaled through a moan, and it was the first time in a long time he's heard thst nickname. it's been years since he's heard it from you. he tapped at your lips with his tongue, eagerly awaiting your access. you gladly obliged, every gram of the guilt that had been building up, finally washing away as he continued to pursue you.

he wrapped his arms around your thighs, sliding you off the chair and into his grasp, not once breaking the kiss. you gasped, saliva trickling down your chin as jj stumbled drunkenly, barely getting it together as he located the entrance to your bedroom. when you fell onto the bed, the kiss finally came to an end, but it was only the beginning. with your head on your pillow and jj on top of you, heat coursed through your veins.

his lips attached themselves to your jaw, peppering kisses along the thin layer of skin. you whined, fingernails gliding down his clothed back as he sucked at your sweet spots. he could read you like a book, knew all of your weaknesses—all of your sweetest, most sensitive points. his tongue travelled further down your neck, veiny hands pulling apart the front of your robe, giving him access to your chest. you swore you heard him growl, but your own moans seemed to block out his noises as he took a tit into his mouth, the rough surface of his tongue circling your nipple before enfulfing the flesh whole.

he was hard, so painfully hard. you knew it, felt it, while he rutted his hips against your bare legs, erection hard against your soft skin. he whined, although he'd never admit it to anyone else. you were all he needed, this was all he'd been waiting for all those years.

“he ever get you wet like this?” the question came out before he could stop himself. there was a specific edge to his voice, a silver lining between curiosity and possessiveness. you couldn't bring yourself to answer, not while he had a hand fondling your tits so roughly, pushing and pinching, the latter rubbing your bare cunt, fingers almost immediately drenching themselves in your juices. all you could do was shake your head.

he was satisfied with the answer, enough to move onto his own clothes. he kept his gaze on your frame, wetting his lips as he took you in—tits bare and hanging out, bite marks littered around your nipples, robe untied, sweat trickling down your stomach, legs spread with your sticky juices coating the outside of your cunt. he peeled his shirt off, followed by the shorts and boxers he had dropped to his ankles.

eager. that's what he was. there was nothing romantic about the way you felt, eyes glued to his dick. you hadn't felt any of it all these years, and though it may have been the alcohol talking, you needed him more than ever. “jay, please,” how was he supposed to say no to such politeness? it wouldn't have been right, not with the way your desperate pleas made him want to ruin all of you.

that's exactly what he had in mind. he grabbed his shaft, lining it up with your entrance, a sigh of relief passing his lips the second he felt your slick coating his tip, and he hadn't even put it in yet. you bit your lip, knowing what was coming, hands pulling him in by his back. with every inch you took, more and more moans spilled out of your mouth. once again, he found himself peppering kisses. this time, on your cheeks. he cooed in your ear, telling you it'd be better soon. “just a few seconds, baby. little more and you'll feel so good,” he slurred.

he was never one to lie. the more you relaxed, the deeper he allowed himself to go. “fucking shit,” he growled, throwing his head back at the familiar feeling of your warmth. you took him well, walls clinging to his shaft, giving him barely the space he needed. you couldn't hold your moans back, and you knew your paper thin walls on the tiny island would do you no justice.

with your nails clawing at his back. he grabbed your legs, placing them over his shoulders to get a better angle going. your eyes practically rolled into the back of your head at the feeling. he drilled into your sopping cunt, hips snapping at an impeccable pace as he chased his high. his balls slammed against your clit, along with his thumb as he pushed his palm into your lower belly, smirking at the way he could practically feel his dick in there. his thumb rubbed at your clit, eliciting the sweetest moans he'd ever hear.

he watched your cunt swallow him whole, the foreign feeling making both of your heads spin. your eyes widened as jj picked up the pace, your heart racing at what was awaiting you. “jj, i gotta pee,” you whined, feet making an attempt to push him away, but it was no use. he shushed you, pressing down on your lower stomach once more. “that's it, fuck.” he quickened his pace, fingers aching as he abused your clit. your orgasm hit you like a brick. your mouth hung open but you remained inaudible, the only focus point being the way your legs shaked as your juices dripped down his shaft.

to add fuel to the fire, instead of stopping, jj began rubbing your clit a second time, flesh slicking the bundle of nerves up with your wetness. he was close, even closer after watching you cum all over his cock. “such a mess.” he teased, and he wasn't wrong. your sheets were soaked, your vision blurry, his pelvis dripping with your arousal.

“hurts so bad.” the sympathy he felt was overwhelming, but he couldn't stop now. he used his free hand to stroke your hair, moving lose strands out of your face. “give me one more, i’m about to cum, baby.” the overstimulation made your eyes water, hips stuttering to meet his powerful thrusts. all he could do was abuse the soft spot inside you, and it didn’t take long before you both came. he buried his face in your neck as he came, burying his cock into your pussy as he emptied all the cum he had to offer, hips stuttering as he moaned. you couldn't pull yourself together at all, head spinning as you did your best to recover.

when he did pull out, you found yourselvee sitting in silence. you were too tired to say anything, only able to turn to your side, eyes begging to be closed. you didn't mind the silence as much as jj did, he watched you closely.

he knew this would be the last of your interactions. he'd go back to kiara, you'd go back to john b. that's the way things would always be, and he knew that. he hated the thought of it, it left him feeling empty. unfulfilled. there was nothing he could do except make the most of the time he had left with you, wrapping his arms around your bare body and pulling you in close as he fought his tears back.

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[abookloverlmao]

THE GIRL IN THE SOCKS ON THE ROOF - JJ Maybank

Summary: save my life and i'll save yours, pretty boy. In the coastal paradise of Outer Banks, Y/N teeters on the edge of the rooftop in socks, drowning in despair, and there's Papa JJ appearing in her life like an angel.

"'Cause it's too cold for you here and now, so let me hold both your hands in the holes of my sweater."

Warning: female!reader, triggering themes (mental health struggles, including references to self-harm, depression, or suicidal thoughts and acts), alcohol, drug, weed, swearing, etc., this will angsty as shit and fluffy, do not read if you don't want to! you have been warned, let me know what you think!

☆

JJ has no idea that he had saved a life.

well, he never believed such a thing, never believed that he was this special to think twice that the person he saved will do anything to pay him back.

And that person was Y/N, the girl in socks on the roof of a building, a tall one.

It was a summer night, the night of the Fourth of July, an hour away from the fireworks starting and here was the handsome blond walking out of the store with few beers and snacks with Sarah Cameron by his side.

Yelling echoed around the neighborhood, and the two blondes turned towards the sound, a man running after a very gorgeous girl in shorts, a top and some socks.

No flipflops, or sandals, just black socks, running down the streets and busy looking behind to notice JJ and Sarah standing there watching in pure confusion until she bumped at him.

"YOU DIRTY LITTLE BITCH COME BACK HERE!" The man yelled and Y/N picked up the bags of snacks he held, apologizing and handing them to him in panic.

Eyes wide with tears covering them, wild hair like she was electrocuted, chest going up and down rapidly, she met Sarah's eyes and shot her the most heartbreaking smile.

"I am so sorry," she turned to JJ, meeting his pretty eyes that watched hers in concern, god she was beautiful, he has never seen someone this gorgeous even in the state of panic.

Before he could even open his mouth to respond, she continued running, she was very fast, legs moving in a speed of light, everytime her feet landed on the ground, pain rushed through her veins.

Adrenaline pumping, the summer night breeze slapping her cheeks left and right, she could feel Sarah Cameron's eyes on hers and the handsome boy whom she bumped into.

As they climbed the Twinkie, JJ's mind not once left the girl who disappeared five minutes ago, he knew who she was, well... he saw her in a few parties, standing there with a drink in hand talking to one pogue mostly.

"I feel like I saw her before," he whispered turning to Sarah who watched in slight worry as the man ran past them with so much hatred in his eyes, a murderous look that scared her.

"That's Y/N, sweetest Kook with apparently a rough life," she replied wincing as another curse left Mister L/N's lips, a frown on her face, JJ's hand was on the steering wheel, feeling a sudden protectiveness towards the girl who bumped into him.

It looked like she had a rough life, especially when she was running in only socks with a man chasing behind her, his eyebrows almost touched and he watched the man in disgust.

He reminded him of his dad... but oh he didn't know that he was basically his dad's twin brother.

"God I hope she doesn't get caught by Mister L/N," she whispered in worry, guilt eating her alive and once JJ started to drive, he looked around in hope to find her.

Nothing.

"It's the fourth of July..." spoke Sarah again, and his mind went back  to Y/N's eyes... brimmed with tears reminded him so much of his, he really wanted to know the reason why she was in that state.

And the second time he saw her was on the roof of a building, John B has sent him again to buy fireworks to light on the beach, but then something caught his eyes.

Someone.

The moonlight shone down on her, black shorts, white top, hair flying everywhere thanks to the wind, black socks, she stood on the edge of the roof staring ahead, the moonlight kissing her skin and making hear tear glisten like diamonds, what the fuck.

Without thinking twice, he sprinted up the stairs, ignoring that it was a building with people living in it, rich people that would knsult him idf they saw him in, he raced up the stairs, boots clapping against the ground as he grabbed the railing for support trying not to trip

He never ran so fast, worry ate him alive as he ran in the speed of light.

Opening the door to the roof with all his force he rushed to the girl just as her feet lifted and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her back to his chest.

She gasped in surprise, her tear-streaked face turning towards him. For a moment, time stood still as their eyes locked. JJ could feel the rapid thumping of her heart against his chest, matching the adrenaline rushing through his own veins.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," he whispered, his voice filled with a mixture of concern and relief, he turned her around and watched as she looked into his eyes, body shaking with a combination of fear and exhaustion.

"You don't have to do this. You're not alone."

She studier him with glossy eyes, watched as he pushed away her hair from her wet cheeks and cupped her cheeks as if he knew her for years.

At his words she collapsed in his arms, clinging to him tightly, as if holding on for dear life, he wrapped his arms around her as tightly and ran his hand down her hair.

He wasn't used to giving hugs, felt awkward when someone gave him one ir he did, but he hugged her, the weight of her struggles and pain was palpable, and in that moment, JJ understood that there was so much more to her story than what he had glimpsed before.

"Grab my hand," she did as told, hand trembling as he gently guided her away from the edge, leading her to a safer spot on the rooftop.

She slipped down the wall, wrapping her arms around herself tightly ss the breeze got rough, then JJ sat beside her, forgetting his task and what he was supposed to buy.

They sat down together, the distant sounds of fireworks starting to fill the night sky, but not the Outer Banks yet, in 10 minutes, JJ's heart raced as he tried to find the right words to say, wanting to offer comfort and support to this girl he barely knew.

He turned to her, taking off his red hat and ruffling his blond hair, "sup, I'm JJ," he finally said, his voice soft but steady and she chuckled at his words, "And you...you don't have to face this alone. Whatever it is, I'm here for you."

Y/N looked up at him, her eyes filled with a mix of gratitude, she sniffled, wiping away the tears that continued to stream down her cheeks.

"Sup, I'm Y/N..." she whispered, her voice barely audible as she pulled her knees closer to her body, staying silent for a minute gnawing at her lower lip, she spoke again, "Thank you, for saving my life and...being there when no one else was."

JJ's heart ached at her words. He couldn't fathom how someone as beautiful and kind-hearted as Y/N could feel so alone and unloved.

He pulled out the lighter and played with it for a few seconds, "I don't know what you've been through, but I want you to know that Papa J, is here for you, no matter what. You deserve to be surrounded by people who care about you."

Y/N's eyes welled up with tears once again, but this time they were tears of relief mixed with a glimmer of hope. She had never expected a chance encounter with JJ to lead to this moment of genuine connection and understanding.

But she blinked away the tears and smiled at him brightly, sitting by his side, her shoulder pressed to his as they stared ahead, "I'll make sure to keep that in mind, Thank you, Papa J," a smile that showed his dimples appeared and she felt herself go warm.

"You know what will make you feel better?" He suddenly spoke standing up and slapping his butt to get rid of the dirt, she looked up at him in confusion, wondering what will make her feel better.

"What?"

JJ smiled down at her brightly like a Cheshire cat, "light some fireworks on the beach, smoke weed, drink beers," he suggested putting his hand in front if her to take.

She stared at his hands for a hot second, glancing at the edge of the roof that she almost fell from and then back at him, she never drank alcohol or even had a puff of smoke, breaking the rules sounded like a good idea at the moment.

"why not." She put her hand on top of his watching him hold it carefully, gently, his rings cold and sending a shiver down her spine.

He lifted her and glanced down at the socks, "damn don't your feet hurt?" She laughed softly and followed his eyes down, "they are hurting now, like a bitch." He nodded in response and they walked towards the stairs, hand still in hers.

Her eyes went back to the edge of the roof again, but JJ blocked her path and pushed the door for her, "after you, be careful not to slip, I almost did with my damn boots." She rolled her eyes but grinned at him.

"You're the clumsy one."  She replied making him roll his eyes and gasp dramatically, pretending to faint while doing so, it made her laugh.

She had a gorgeous laugh, contagious that it made him laugh as well, he wondered why a girl like her would even think of trying to leave this world.

He wanted to ask, but no. This wasn't the right moment.

☆☆☆

He handed her his scandals (which led to her saying that his feet were bigger than her face) and called John B to apologize and explain what happened while she was looking for slushy flavors.

Then they went to the beach, watched the fireworks, drank beers, and shared weed, one after the other, placing her lips right where his were, he taught her basic surf tricks, and he did everything to make her forget about the troubles filling her mind.

And it worked.

They laughed, and they talked for hours, sharing stories, dreams, and even their deepest fears, water was reaching her thighs as she watched the colorful explosions in the night sky.

She was high and watching the sky have multicolor stars with so much awe, her eyes glossy and her hand waving underwater, and JJ admired.

Every single feature, the way she watched the fireworks and stood by his side, hair wild and crazy, speaking her mind in a way he never thought anyone would do so, wearing only her bikini top and shorts.

How can a person high till cloud 9 speak like that? He thought, "I mean, that's the thing, Lana Del Rey once said..." She put her finger up, swallowing, "Live fast, die young, be wild, and have fun. That’s my motto, but my dad did everything to not give me my freedom, everything, and believe it or not this is the first time I felt happy."

JJ knew what it was like, it was the same for him, his dad was a fucking asshole and everyone knew it, they all blamed that man's crime on him, and he hated that she had the same problems.

"I think we need to get out, you're way too high baby," he spoke with a laugh grabbing her waist and starting to make his way out of the water.

"oh come on I'm trying to be emotional here! Wait- did you just call me baby?" she asked grabbing his wrist, slurring over her words.

JJ chuckled, his heart warming at Y/N's playful reaction. He had been so caught up in the moment that he had let slip a term of endearment without even realizing it.

But now, with her intoxicated state bringing out her candidness, he found himself unable to hide his smile.

"Yeah, I did call you baby," he replied, his voice teasing, "It just slipped out. But you know what? I think it suits you."

Y/N's eyes widened, a mix of surprise and amusement crossing her face. "Oh really? And why is that?" he couldn't respond instead raised his eyebrow at her, showing his cute dimples that made her smile even more brightly.

"I will not tell you." and next thing he knew she pulled him deeper in the water and pulled him along, pushing him with her in, his hand wrapped around her waist to not lose her and water surrounded them.

them swimming around one another, the light coming from the moon and fireworks the only thing brightening their surroundings, all euphoric. As their eyes locked underwater, JJ felt a surge of anticipation, the world around them seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of them suspended in the watery depths.

They swam closer and closer, her hair moving around her like a mermaid, he watched as the multicolor lights flashing kissed her skin, eyes twinkling like pearls.

As they swam closer, their bodies gracefully gliding through the liquid medium, time seemed to slow down. Every movement, every touch, was heightened by the magical atmosphere surrounding them. The water embraced them, caressing their skin and amplifying the intensity of their connection.

Y/N has never seen such a beautiful person like JJ, his blonde hair shimmered like strands of liquid gold, framing his face in a way that accentuated his angelic features, ocean eyes watching her in a way no one did, it made her blood run hot even underwater, his muscles twitching as he moved.

God, he was beautiful....

He was angel. That's it, he was an angel sent from heaven to save her from the roof and make her life worth living for.

Their faces drew closer, the space between them narrowing with each passing second, but just as her lips were about to brush against his, doubt crept into JJ's mind. 

He hesitated, like he always did, his thoughts momentarily overpowering the weird feelings he felt in that moment. He withdrew slightly, his hand releasing its grip on her waist.

His wide eyes met hers, and for a moment, the silence between them was deafening, she hesitated as well, confused as to why he did in the first place, but never going to question it.

Maybe he didn't feel comfortable, she thought, JJ's mind raced, questioning the wisdom of his decision, too risky, she's high and probably won't remember by tomorrow- JJ calm the fuck down.

He hated himself for hesitating but he had no choice, she grabbed his shirt and swam back up with him to the surface, JJ followed, cursing himself for letting his doubts cloud the moment, for allowing fear to guide his actions. 

But deep down, he knew he couldn't ignore the nagging thoughts that had caused him to retreat.

Y/N, for her part, seemed to accept the situation without questioning it. Her silence spoke volumes, leaving JJ with a mix of relief and regret, as they resurfaced, the world above the water greeted them with its own set of distractions. 

The sounds of laughter and music filled the air, the festivities of the night continuing as if nothing had happened below the surface. Y/N's wide eyes met his again, searching for answers that he couldn't provide.

JJ gave her a weak smile and her, perceptive as ever, returned his smile with a gentle nod, and just before she started to swim back to land, he spoke with a high pitched voice to not make her go.

"me and my friend want to become Kooks, looking for gold, anything that will make us rich, when this world will become gentle with us, I'm gonna get a new board. I'm gonna deck it out, and I'm gonna go on a surf trip. Ride, whatever the waves take you, you know?" he said watching her stop and turn back around.

A smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she listened to his plans, his determination shining through despite the uncertainties of their current moment.

Dreams do save lives after all.

"Do you have your passport, pretty boy?" she asked with a laugh at his determination, it made his hammering heart slow down, and relief wash over him as he thought she was mad at him at first.

"Hell no, I don't got a passport, Kookiest thing ever." he replied making her laugh even harder, throwing her head back and staring at the sky, her laughter echoing through the water and bringing a sense of lightheartedness to their conversation.

“You definitely should do that, that’s a real dream, surf trip, I believe in you,” she said with a chuckle, starting to swim towards the rock where they kept their stuff hidden just in case someone might steal them, gesturing him to come along.

“you’re saying that like I will do it alone,” he said lifting himself up and out of the water, wrapping the towel he had in the Twinkie around her and grabbing his stuff, “well you will do it with your friends, not alone,” she replied wrapping the towel tighter around her, putting on her sandals.

JJ grabbed their stuff and walked out of the rock, offering his hand so she wouldn’t slip, “and you,” he replied making her smile and glance back at him, "me? So I'm a Pogue now?" she asked teasingly ruffling her hair with the towel.

"Well, I am your friend, you like adventure, saving animals and the sea, you don't hate us, I think you are born a Pogue, besides we could really use your help to become rich," he said shrugging while opening the door to the van.

washing her feet to get rid of the sand she climbed in the passenger seat, towel still tight around her, a mischievous glint in her eyes, "Well, if being a Pogue means embarking on thrilling escapades with you and running from cops, count me in," she said, her voice filled with excitement.

"deal."

and she did become one, helped them find the gold by stealing maps from her father's office, and became a sister to almost everyone, Kiara didn't trust her which was fine, but she didn't hate her either.

Besides she understood what it was like, JJ had stayed by her side for the rest of the time, she was on his, she saved him in many ways, the jacuzzi night, she held him, they ran from cops, she stole for him, for them, got in trouble as well and she was loyal.

That way she cried with him that night when she found out what Luke did to him was the same thing her father did to her, cried with him, and held him at the same time, they were both broken after all.

The night she tried to end her life was the night she met JJ Maybank and he saved her in every way a person can be saved, she stayed the night in John B's house, on the couch, her head to JJ's.

everyone was already asleep, both of them damp after their night swim.

"I see you," he suddenly whispered, the light buzzing from god knows where filling the silence along with the crickets, for a second he thought she had fallen asleep since no answer came from her, "and?" she asked a hot minute, tilting her to the side.

His scent filled her nostrils and made her tensed shoulders relax instantly, "you wouldn't have jumped." he replied staring at the ceiling, his blonde hair falling over his eyes.

JJ's whispered words hung in the air, the weight of their meaning sinking in. Y/N's heart skipped a beat as she processed his statement, his words cut through the darkness, reaching deep into her soul, and touching upon a truth that she had kept hidden for so long.

"God knows what would've happened if you weren't there," she whispered staring at the ceiling with tears blurring her vision, she played with the shell charm of his bracelet.

"but I'm glad it was you," her voice was barely above a whisper, but he heard it, and when he spoke his voice was as soft as a feather, "I'm glad too," he had said and then she felt her blood run hot, cheeks turning rosy.

and with that, they both fell asleep, her finger hooked around his bracelet and his finger drew patterns, their faces so close at the edge of the couch, her head to the right and his to the left, noses almost bumping.

Their breaths synchronized, her scent mixing with his creating the most intoxicating perfume that ever existed, peace washing over them as they slept close to one another, safe from any trouble.

☆☆☆

They fell in love, and they hesitated to tell one another, like the night they hesitated to kiss, there was a palpable tension that's for sure, even the blind could sense it.

But the day she realized that one day she will stop hesitating was in the boat when he fell off it.

"Clear." 

He whispered and Y/N walked away with JJ following behind her, a man suddenly appeared in front of her making her call out for the pretty blonde, "JJ..." "of course, there's more of you..." he said pulling out a machete, "get down on your knees," he ordered and JJ grabbed the girl by the waist pulling her back as soon as the man stepped towards her. "Yeah, that's not gonna happen." with that, he charged at the girl who ducked immediately, JJ punched the man and pinned his arm, and Y/N kicked him right in the crotch before with the door to the emergency power locker supply.

Y/N ran towards the railing calling out for the Routledge boy, "JOHN B!" she yelled not even noticing the man approaching her from behind, JJ's eyes widened in horror as he called out for the girl.

"Y/N!" she turned around, eyes on the weapon that went flying towards her, she moved away but it sliced her arm making her wince in pain, "Y/N!" he called again in worry.

Eberhimi lifted his machete and JJ caught his wrist, grabbing him from behind, and elbowing the younger boy in the stomach, he swung at Y/N who caught his wrist and grabbed her collar, her head went to the side and the end of the weapon went right to JJ.

Her eyes widened in terror as JJ fell off the boat into the water, she bit Eberhimi's wrist before grabbing the hand that held the machete, twisting it, and she slammed his head against the glass before the wall.

And with that, he fell to the ground unconscious, Y/N ran towards the edge and called out for JJ whose face was on the water, "JJ!" she called loud enough for Outer Banks to hear.

Y/N's heart pounded in her chest as she watched the boy, she climbed the edge and her demons immediately consumed her, panic gripped her as memories of her own pain and struggles flooded her mind, the night she was standing on the edge.

the same feeling she felt during the fourth of July threatening to overwhelm her, she didn't do it, yet here she is standing on the edge once again.

But she knew she couldn't let fear paralyze her. She had to act. She will step off the edge, god she hoped the water wouldn't turn to solid rocks and kill her immediately, as a payback for not doing it that night

Either you face it or JJ dies. she thought.

With her heart pounding and her mind filled with a mixture of terror and determination, Y/N took a deep breath and closed her eyes tightly before stepping off the edge. 

The air rushed past her, and for a split second, she felt weightless, suspended between the fear of the unknown and the hope for a different outcome.

As she descended towards the water, her mind raced with thoughts of what awaited her below. Would the water be a lifeline, cradling her safely in its embrace? Or would it become a cruel reminder, punishing her for the choice she didn't make before?

It was too deep, way too deep, she wasn't that good at swimming either, her feet touched the sand for fuck's sake that night because she was scared!

"JJ!" she screamed swimming towards him, turning the boy around she wrapped her arm around his waist, trying to keep them both afloat. 

Her heart was racing as she struggled to keep her head above water, tried to fight her own demons that gripped her hair, feet, and everywhere and pulled her, "Please wake up JJ," she pleaded, her voice choked with tears and water that started filling her lungs, "I need you." she begged.

"JJ, stay with me." she called pushing his pretty blonde hair out of his face as she slapped his cheek gently, "J, please. Please!" she exclaimed louder this time.

Y/N's arms were growing tired, and she was struggling to keep JJ's head above water, his entire body leaned against hers desperately.

She could feel herself slowly drowning, but she refused to let go of him. Kicking and trashing around, moving her legs in fast motions, looked nothing like swimming, but kept her head a little above. She moved her legs around at a rapid speed to keep them both afloat, her heart was pounding in her chest, and she was gasping for air, her eyes burning from the salty water.

"Hang on, JJ," she said, her voice shaking. "We'll make it through this together." Despite her fear and exhaustion, Y/N continued to fight, determined not to let JJ go.

she leaned her head against his, his entire head leaning on her shoulder, "John B's coming, John B's coming." she whispered hoping he could hear her, mostly to herself, so she doesn't give up and let her demons take her.

The world really was against her huh?

Y/N was growing weaker by the second, her arms and legs were aching, and she could feel her muscles going numb. 

She slowly leaned back, her eyes growing heavy as she struggled to stay conscious, "JJ," she called his name a thousand times, her voice barely above a whisper, "Stay with me, please." 

Y/N knew she was fighting a losing battle, she did everything she could to stay awake and not let the water take her. 

She squeezed him tightly, feeling his body grow heavier in her arms, despite the pain and exhaustion trying to take over, and dominate, she stayed awake until help arrived.

until John B. arrived.

"JOHN B! HELP!" 

Y/N's lungs were burning, and she could feel the water going into her mouth as she called out for help.

"Help!" she shouted, her voice hoarse, "Please, John B help us!" she could feel herself slipping away, her body growing numb as the water enveloped her. 

She coughed and sputtered, the taste of salt water filling her mouth, but even as she struggled to breathe, she refused to let go of JJ.

She held him tightly, her arm wrapped around him so tightly, doing everything she could to keep him above water, even pushing him slightly above her even if it resulted in her being underwater.

"Hang on, JJ," she said, her voice shaking, "Just a little longer. John B is coming." Despite the overwhelming odds against her, Y/N continued to fight, her legs moving rapidly as if she never swam in her entire life, determined to stay alive for JJ's sake.

Y/N sobbed against JJ's neck, her tears mixing with the salt water, "I'm sorry," she said, her voice trembling from the cold and fear, "I'm sorry. I should've been hit." 

She felt guilty and responsible for JJ's injuries, and the weight of it was unbearable. 

The water felt like it had hands, pulling her down and dragging her away from JJ. But she clung to him, her grip growing tighter as she fought against the current. 

Soon enough, John B appeared and the pogues called out for their friend, "NO! No! No!" exclaimed John B stopping the boat and reaching for his best friend, his brother, and his family.

Y/N couldn't hear her friends calling out for her. She was lost in her own world, struggling to keep her head above water.

As soon as she felt JJ's weight slip away from her, safe and in the arms of her best friend, she let the water take her. 

She felt herself sinking deeper and deeper, the darkness closing in all around her.

It wasn't until she felt the strong hands of Sarah, John B, Pope, and Kiara grabbing her and lifting her from under the water that she opened her eyes, gasping for air. 

She clung to them tightly, using their strength to lift herself up and out of the water. She was shaking and disoriented, but she was alive.

 "Thank you," she said, her voice barely above a whisper, "Thank you for saving me." with that, she looked around for JJ, and her heart sank to her stomach when she saw him lying motionless in the lifeboat.

She crawled towards him, her hands shaking as she reached out to slap his cheek, "Wake up, JJ," she pleaded, her voice choked with emotion.

"Please, wake up!" But JJ remained still, and Y/N felt a sense of panic rising in her chest, no, he can't die. 

she knew that she had to do something to help him, so she began slapping his chest, trying to get the water out of his lungs, her friends surrounded her with worry and fear rushing through their veins.

Only Y/N calling and begging him to wake up boomed around them. "Come on, JJ, you can do this. Get up!" she said, her voice quivering badly, she was always a tough person with no fear in her eyes, and now they could see the pure anger and worry in them.

"Don't leave me like this." Y/N continued to work on JJ, refusing to give up even as her arms were limp and her eyes were blurry.

JJ suddenly sat up, coughing and spluttering, water coming out of his mouth.

He looked around, disoriented, and saw John B smiling down at him, "Welcome to the land of the living, dude," John B said, his voice filled with relief. "No CPR needed, huh?"

He didn't respond, instead, his eyes landed on Y/N's hand on his chest, and then on her tear-streaked face.

 He sat up, feeling the weight of what had just happened hit him, his tensed muscles dropped at the sight of her like this, "Hi," she greeted, her voice hoarse and filled with relief.

"'sup?" he added teasingly, trying to lighten the mood.

Everyone laughed, and Y/N smacked him before pulling his head towards her chest and hugging him tightly. 

She cried silently and kissed his forehead repeatedly, whispering, "Oh, darling, oh JJ, I thought I lost you."

JJ hugged her back, burying his head in the crook of her neck, "I'm here," he said, his voice shaking with emotion. "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere." He held her tightly, feeling her warmth and her love envelop him.

For a moment, everything else faded away, and all that mattered was Y/N and JJ, together and alive, that was also the day they both realized they were really in love.

"What the hell happened?" JJ asked, reaching to touch his wound, but Y/N slapped his hand away, replacing it with a piece of fabric.

"The blunt end of a machete," replied Cleo, her voice filled with concern, "Machete?" JJ asked a hint of pride in his voice, "The blunt end. Next time, duck," Y/N said, nodding at Cleo before turning to glare at JJ.

JJ chuckled, wincing slightly at the pain in his side. "I'll try to remember that next time," he said, his voice laced with humor, "Thanks for the save, Y/N."

Y/N shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "You saved me, I save you," she said, her eyes softening as she looked at JJ, "I couldn't let anything happen to your dumbass."

JJ smirked, but then he suddenly fainted dramatically, his body falling back onto the boat.

Y/N gasped and rushed to his side, checking his wounds, "JJ, JJ, are you okay?" she asked, her voice full of worry, suddenly, JJ's eyes snapped open, and he grinned up at her. "Gotcha," he said, laughing.

Y/N rolled her eyes in vexation, but she couldn't help but smile, "You're such a drama queen," she said, shaking her head in amusement.

JJ sat up, wincing slightly at the pain in his side, "What can I say?" he said, his voice filled with humor. "I like to keep you on your toes." she looked at JJ in pure annoyance, raising an eyebrow, "I can throw you back, you know," she said, her voice laced with sarcasm.

JJ grinned, knowing full well that she would never actually do it. "You won't," he said, his voice teasing.

But then Y/N gave him a glare that made him wince. "You won't, right?" he asked, suddenly unsure, "if you annoy me, then I will." 

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

A/N: this might be one of the most beautiful things I've written along with Fairytale, my Kaz Brekker book which you can check out on Wattpad, my account is: KazBrekker090!

I am in love with JJ, that is it, took a while for me to finish this so please do comment what you think and whether I should write a Part 2 where they kiss? Request anything you wish by the way! and thank you!

Like and comment pls!

#outer banks jj #outer banks imagine #outer banks #outer banks x reader #x you #kiara carrera #john b routledge #sarah cameron #pope heyward #jj maybank fic #jj maybank x reader #jj obx #jj maybank x reader fluff #jj maybank x reader angst #x reader #fluff #angst #obx x reader #obx fanfiction #obx fic #outer banks fanfiction #rudy pankow x reader #rudy pankow

[obx-paradise]

What Happened To You?

Summary: You and Rafe have always been close but when you both get involved in the chase for the gold on opposing teams, some things change

Pairing: Rafe x Adopted sibling!reader; JJ x Cameron!reader (if you squint)

Warnings: Violence, Manipulation, Basically all of the shows warnings

Word Count: 2.7k

—

Growing up as a Cameron was easy. You got everything handed to you on a silver platter, as did all the other Cameron siblings.

Your mom and dad weren’t sure if they were going to be able to have any more children after Sarah came along so they decided to adopt since they always wanted a minimum of 3 children.

It came as a shock when they found out that she was pregnant with another baby, Wheezie.

That’s how they ended up with you as a part of their family.

Growing up, you had a strong bond with Rafe. Your mom would tell you that he had always loved you, from the first time he saw you at 3 years old he wanted to help his mom take care of you. She said it was the same way with Sarah but as you got older you saw that it wasn’t.

Rafe never treated you and Sarah the same. He was gentle with you, not to say he wasn't with Sarah, he just wasn’t as kind. It was a different kind of relationship. 

Although being a Cameron had its benefits, you didn’t want your last name to define you. You weren’t some rich stuck-up asshole who uses their money to gain power. You were a kind-spirited, humble person. 

Over the years, you had been taught that the people who had less than you were less than you. You grew out of that once you met the one person who would change that whole perspective. 

—

You had been assigned an experiment in school that day and you had to pick a location and do a good deed.

What better place to go than the cut. 

You were walking from house to house, knocking on doors, asking if anyone needed help with anything. Most people, knowing who you were, said yes but unfortunately the jobs were too big for a 13-year-old so you weren't able to do them. 

Finally, you came up to a house that didn’t look to be in the best condition. The door opened and standing there was a boy. You had seen him around Figure Eight doing odd jobs here and there. His name was JJ. He was cute. He looked like he was as old as you, 13 maybe 14 years old. No older than that.

You began to recite the same speech you had given to everyone who opened their door for you. It’s engraved in your brain at this point. You were tired and if he refused then you would probably go home and try again another day.

“Hi! My name is Y/n. I’m doing an experiment for a school project where I find someone who needs help with anything around their home, and I do it for them. Is there anything I can help you with today?”

Rather than accepting your offer, he said, “Do I look like I need help?”

As confused as you were you answered with, “Um… yeah kinda. It could be anything like washing your car, cutting your grass or cleaning your porch. Anything like that.”

You were desperate for him to say yes to anything you had just suggested. You needed an A on this project considering you were close to failing the class.

It was the only class you had a C in and you needed to pass, or your dad would sit you down and talk about how doing the best you can is all he could ever want but you know that he wants you to be the best. 

“You’re a kook?” he asked you as he stepped out on the porch and closed the door behind him

“Yeah, I guess. I don’t see how that matters though”

“It matters because we don’t take charity” He seemed very set on his answer

“Well, it’s not –” You were cut off by the sound of glass breaking coming from inside his house, then by the door flying open. You immediately saw JJ freeze and tense up at the sound of the man's voice. 

“JJ! Boy, what are you doing out here!? Get your ass inside!”

JJ looked at you with what looked like fear in his eyes. “You need to get out of here. Now.”

You went to question why but before you could, the man, who you assumed was his dad, grabbed him by the arm and dragged him inside. Looking back at you he yelled one last “Go!” before the door was shut behind him. Leaving you standing on his porch, worried, thinking about him.

—

Ever since then, you visited him almost every day because you were worried about him. Over time you both became good friends then, eventually, best friends. 

When he introduced you to the rest of the pogues you felt a sense of comfort that you had never felt while you were around your other friends. 

You knew that this was going to be your new normal. Hanging out on the cut with your best friends, with not a care in the world.

You have been shielded your whole life and although you like the safety of it all, you wanted some excitement. 

So when you got involved in everything with the Royal Merchant and the gold you realized that you had gotten what you wished for. Later on, you found out that Sarah had also gotten involved along with the shock of her dating John B. 

You and Sarah had a good but complicated relationship. She’s your sister and you love her but you couldn’t help but be jealous of her at times. But not always.

She had all the attention on her at all times, she was the “kook princess” as many people put it. Everyone loved her, including Ward. It was no secret that she was his favorite and always will be.

That was probably why you have always been closer to Rafe. Something was holding you back from having a full relationship with your sister.

But standing here in front of Rafe, you have a feeling that some things are about to change.

—

“You jumped him, Rafe!” You just found out that Rafe and Topper, but mostly Rafe, had jumped Pope on the golf course earlier that day. 

You couldn’t believe him. You knew he hated pogues but you could’ve never imagined your brother would beat up your friend. 

“Yeah, I jumped him, Y/n. They pulled a gun on Top!” You could tell that he was angry. Maybe not at you, but at the situation.

“Pope didn’t do anything. Topper was drowning John B! What else would’ve made him stop?!”

“Why are you defending them? Why is it okay for them to pull out guns on us?” He was definitely using up all of his patience on you. However much he had.

You let out a sigh “It’s not okay, Rafe. But it’s also not okay for you to do what you did. Can you please, just, not do it again? For me?”

You were really hoping he’d agree to stop hurting your friends. With everything going on you didn't need him hurting anyone. 

“Fine, but if they cross me, I won’t hesitate to beat their asses.” With that, he walked away.

—

As time went on, things kept getting worse and worse with the chase for the gold. Turns out all the gold was on land, in Parcel 9. Finding it was surprisingly easy and once you guys had a couple of pieces you decided to melt it and pawn it off.

The lady at the counter had told JJ that she would give him the money but she didn’t have that much cash in the shop so she had to send you all to the “warehouse” that was practically in the middle of nowhere.

After a couple minutes of driving, a cop pulled you guys over.

“Cops? Out here?” Kie had said 

“God! Are you kidding me? What did we do?”

As the cop got out of the car you quickly realized that the “cop” was not a cop at all. The man had walked up to John B’s window and shoved a gun in his face, yelling at him to get out of the car.

When you were walking out of the Twinkie, the guy pointed the gun at your face and yelled at you to lie in the ditch, threatening to shoot you. JJ came to your defense and started yelling back at the man, but you knew if you didn’t stop him, he would get shot.

“JJ, stop it!” You yelled in hopes that it would get him to stop provoking the only person with a gun. 

Eventually, he found what he wanted and went back to his car, ready to drive off, when John B attacked him from the inside. Once he was down, you took off his mask and recognized him as Barry. The local drug dealer.

“I know this piece of shit! He sells coke to my dad.” JJ said glaring at Barry on the ground

“Probably knows my brother,” Sarah said with disgust

It was no secret that Rafe took drugs. You had never seen him doing them but everyone knew.

JJ bent down, grabbed Barry’s ID, and checked his address. He decided that you all would go to Barry’s house.

Unfortunately, JJ’s “plan” had gotten you in trouble with your brother. 

—

You were walking through town, minding your business, when you heard a motorbike coming up behind you. You turned around to find Rafe on his bike, stopping beside you. 

“Hey,” You said as you stopped walking

“So you’re going around robbing drug dealers now?!” He sounded angry at you, which was unusual because of the relationship you both have with each other. Although, recently you have been drifting apart. 

“What are you talking about? I didn’t rob anyone.” You played it off as if you had no clue what he was talking about.

“Oh no, you’re right, it was your pouge boyfriend! That asshole is dragging you into shit you don't need to be in!”

“Don’t talk about my friend that way. JJ is not my boyfriend, and he didn’t steal anything from anyone.”

You didn’t know what Rafe would do if you admitted the truth. If he would go after your friend. You didn't want anything to happen to JJ if Rafe decided to go through with anything. 

“You’re the good one, Y/n! Sarah can go off the rails, your “friends” can rob people and shit like that but you…you’re supposed to be the sane one.” He said as he walked toward you, getting in your face.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Rafe.” Once again you were trying to push the issue aside. You didn’t want him to get aggressive with you as he tends to get with others.

“I…I want you to stop hanging around them. I want you to be my sister again” He spoke softer, having calmed down a bit.

“I’m still your sister, it’s just that the stuff you do doesn’t help the situation we’re in and it hurts to know that you would willingly do something to hurt me or the people I care about.”

“I would never do anything to hurt you” You would later come to find out that his statement wasn’t true but in the moment you believed him.

—

When Sarah walked into your room one night and told you that Rafe shot Peterkin, you refused to believe her. You didn’t want it to be true.

“What’s happening, Sarah?” You said while pacing the room “This shit is crazy, I don’t know if I can do this anymore” 

“I know, but I’ve told you, he’s psychotic. He’s going crazy and Dad is defending him. Can you believe that?” 

You knew Ward would protect Rafe no matter what.

“I can actually. He would protect any of us if we did something like that.”

—

All of these events led up to where you are right now. You were with JJ getting the Phantom for John B so he could get off the island.

While JJ was going on and on about the boat, you heard a motorbike pull up. Assuming it was Pope, you both ran over to the other side of the boat hanger only to find Rafe and Barry walking towards you. 

You haven’t seen Rafe in a few days but you could tell that he did not look good.

“Rafe, what are you doing here? You need to get out of here. Please” You were panicking. Especially with Barry also being there, it made it worse. 

“See, don't think I forgot about me and you on the side of the road,” Barry said, more like yelled, while pulling out a gun and pointing it at JJ “I'm here because I want my motherfuckin' money”

As Barry started swinging at JJ you pleaded with Rafe, asking him to stop them

“Rafe, please get him to stop. I’m begging you. Please”

“This isn’t about you, Y/n.” He said walking toward you “Where’s John B?”

“I don't know!”

“Hey! Don’t fucking lie to me! Where is he?” He was now completely in your space. Walking towards you while you’re walking backward until he has cornered you. 

Instead of answering his question, you said, “Sarah told me what you did,”

“What? What did I do?”

“You murdered Peterkin” you muttered considering his closeness. 

As soon as you uttered those words, Rafe did something you never thought he would do. He wrapped his hands around your neck strangling you while doing so.

“Don't you ever say those fucking words again”

“Rafe!”

“Understand?”

You had begun crying at this point, hyperventilating, trying to take in as much air as you could before you were cut off completely.

“Rafe…it’s me, it’s your sister, please…”

You looked up into his eyes and saw nothing but anger. It was like he wasn’t conscious of his actions. 

As soon as you felt like you were about to faint, you heard a muffled voice yell “Don't touch her!” from behind Rafe, then a second later, Rafe’s hands let go of your neck, causing you to start coughing, and gasping for air immediately. 

You looked up and saw Pope punching and kicking Rafe and while Rafe did fight back, Pope’s anger made him stronger.

Within the same minute, JJ had managed to overpower Barry and the gun slipped out of his hand.

“Y/n! Kick it!” and so you did but when you turned around you saw Pope strangling Rafe with some type of hose that had been lying in a pile of equipment. 

“Pope. Okay, Pope.” You weren’t freaking out as much as you should be, considering Pope could, very well, kill your brother right now.

“Pope, that's good! Stop!” He still wouldn’t stop

“Pope, that's too much!” You yelled out while JJ followed with, “Dude, come on! Stop! Stop, dude!”

You were starting to wonder if Pope would ever go that far but after you and JJ yelling a bit longer, Pope finally let go. Letting Rafe fall to the ground, face bloodied, and hyperventilating.

The same position you were in a couple of minutes ago, minus the blood. With him on the floor and Barry knocked out you were able to get a good look at him. You could still see the anger in his eyes as he looked up at you.

You couldn’t help but wonder where it all went wrong. Was it the drugs, the gold, or has it been this way for a while and you were just noticing it now? 

“What happened to you?” You whispered with tears in your eyes as he lay there saying nothing back, so you continued “What happened to my brother who said he would never hurt me or put me in danger?”

With that you walked away, joining JJ and Pope who had already hooked up the boat to the back of the truck.

“You good?” JJ asked when you entered the car, “Yeah, let’s go”

With that, you both drove off without looking back. 

Knowing that you would never let yourself wonder “What happened?” ever again.

—

A/n: First post is done! I really hope you all like it. Please let me know if i could improve anything.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x sister!reader #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank #outer banks #obx pogues #obx #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron x female reader #angst

[starficrecs]

JJ MAYBANK FIC RECS

fluff = 💫, angst = 🎬, smut = 💄, headcanons/other = 🌃

- his hands 💫

- my angel 🎬💫

- baddie!gf hcs 🌃

- no air to breathe 🎬💫

- guilty 🎬 (part 2: wanted 💄🎬)

- pocketful of sunshine 💄

- the storm 💄

- sugar lips 💫

- protective 💫

- intimidated 🎬💫

- dirt bike, dirtbag 💫

i will keep adding to this, feel free to recommend some fics !

#jj maybank x reader #fic rec #jj maybank x reader fluff #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank x reader smut #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank angst #jj maybank smut #fic recs #jj maybank fic recs #jj maybank

[strangelysamantha]

scars ☆

jj maybank x fem!reader.

warnings: abuse, bruises, the nickname baby is used, talk of sadness and depression and not being happy with life.

words: 1,088.

summary: jj comes to you after a blow out with his father. you clean his bruises as well as clean his awful mindset he has on life.

request? no.

a/n: hi. i’m back from the dead hello. i got a lot of stories planned.

my masterlist

——————————————————————————

you hear light taps from your window. you lift from your bed to crack it open. you weren’t expecting to see jj today. he climbs in and immediately settles onto your bed. he flops down dramatically and you can’t help but giggle from the theatrics. “hi jj” you coo softly. “hi baby” his response is quiet. your room is lit by a small lamp, you can’t even make out jjs features so you close the window, and intend to turn the light on. jj grabs your arm however, and you halt.

“can you just lay with me for a second?” his tone tings at your heart and you can tell something is wrong. “yea, of course jj. anything.” you hop into the bed, and immediately cradle at his side. he’s laying on his back. “do you want me to sit on top, or do you want to spoon?” you question. he hesitated. “you can cuddle me however you’d like baby. i’ll enjoy it all the same.” you nod. his mood seemed off, as well as his tone. you didn’t want to rush into it and upset him, but you did want to get to the bottom of it. you choose to spoon him, this moment feeling intimate and full of love. you place your hand on his heart; it beating rapidly.

you cup his face, you feel tears as well as a slight pulse in his eye. you stand up quickly, running to the light switch. when you turn around, his face is bloody and bruised. your heart sinks and you feel a pain that’s so indescribable but completely deadly. your lips are flat lined and a huge range of emotions release. you shake your head, a tear already threatening to spill. he’s silent, and avoids eye contact. you’ve been here before, never this bad. nonetheless, you have a routine.

you go to your bathroom. you grab the first aid kit, wet a cloth, and grab everything you need to stitch him up. you walk back and sit on the bed, your back to the wall. he, like a hurt puppy, follows every instruction you give. “come here jj, let me help you.” he hates when you see him like this, but he doesn’t have anyone else who would do what you do. if he did go to anyone else, he wouldn’t feel great forcing his trauma on others. “what happened baby? who hurt you?” your words are soft and you want nothing more than to cradle him and take his sorrows away.

“my father. who would have guessed? i’ll be alright. i’ll walk it off.” you investigate his wrist for any damage, you don’t see any, so you give it a flick. “no that’s not how it works jj, and you know it.” he frowns, “i wish it was.” you give him reassuring rubs on his back. he’s sitting up, and facing you. his hands rest on your knees, and he anxiously rubbing them. “i know baby, i wish these moments didn’t impact us, but they do. and we learn to take it in, and let it go.” you dab the wash cloth on his face, to get the dried blood. “did you walk here?” you question. “more like ran.”

you sigh, you reach for his tank top, urging to pull it off. he complies easily letting you swipe it off his back. his chest isn’t bad, mainly his face that held a black eye and cuts, from his fathers ring. “how you feeling?” you continue the routine of fixing him up. you’ve gotten good at it. he hums, before starting. “you say you always want me to be honest?” you nod, “yes. i want you to be fully honest with me.”

“well. honestly? i’m not doing great. i don’t want to put this all on you but i just, i don’t know why i’m here?” you question him, “why you’re here?” he continues, “why am i forced to live dealing with an abusive father, being broke, having everyone against me?” he breathes deeply, his emotions overcoming him, “no matter what i do, i loose.” you hate seeing him like this. “jj, please. i love you so much. and i don’t want to loose you. i know it’s hard. it’s so heartbreaking to see you in this condition. physically, mentally, it does damage. i can’t ever know what it’s like to be in your shoes.” you pull him into a hug and he squeezes you tight.

“please.. stay strong for me. i need you to come to me if you ever feel this way. talk about it, write it, scream it, all of the above. i want you to have an outlet to let these emotions out so they don’t consume you.” he pulls you in for a passionate kiss filled with love. tears are streaming down both yours, and jjs face. you struggle to suppress the whimpers coming from you. “can you promise you’ll come to me if you ever feel that way?” he nods, “i promise.” you close your eyes and lean your head into his chest. “i love you so much. seeing you like this hurts. but i’d rather see you like this, then never see you at all.” those words hurt him, gave him the realization that if anything happened to him, it would hurt you worse. this thought clouded his mind. his wounds were all patched up. you went downstairs to get a few ice bags. you came up and positioned them on his bruises. you turned the big light on and retreated to the small lamp. he thanked you for the ice bags, and you turned your tv on.

“your choice for tv, what would you like to watch?” you question. he thinks for a second before softly reaching for the remote and turning his show on. you cuddle him close, occasionally kissing his neck and whispering how much you love and appreciate him. not even half way through the episode do you hear tiny snores coming from him. you laugh slightly to yourself; pausing the show. you get ready for bed, despite his condition, you know you’re going to sleep well, and comfortably. you remove the ice bags, dumping them in the sink, and placing the plastic baggies on the counter. you dry your hands and return to the bed with him, engulfing the two of you with a blanket. you smoothly cuddle against him, sure to not wake him, up, as you prepare to dream soundly next to him.

#jj maybank outer banks #jj maybank #outer banks #outer banks fanfic #outer banks imagines #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank fanfic #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank x you #jj maybank story #jj maybank angst #jj maybank imagine

[obxsummer]

I Fall Apart // Ghost of You

navigation -- series masterlist

--

summary: jj gets to mack on his girl, sarah's got topper whipped, john b and his dad are MIA, and y/n's reminded just how reckless her boyfriend can be

warnings: s3 spoilers, accidents, panic attacks, shitty parenting as per usual

--

The first thing you did was shove JJ into the shower. The next was handling getting the electricity back on since clearly your father wasn’t concerned with doing that. You were fine with not tagging along with their treasure hunting, but you were worried about your brother. He loved your dad, adored him for so much of his life, and it concerned you that he wouldn’t see what a pawn he was in your dad’s plans. 

You had told JJ as much as you sat in the bathroom on the floor while he showered. You told him about Singh’s place, about Rafe, and how your dad sent you guys on a goose chase for a rock. JJ couldn’t say he was surprised, about any of it, but he was just glad to be back with you. 

Soon enough, Sarah and Kie were on your doorstep, the four of you crowding out by the dock to get the last of the warm sun on you before turning in for the night. 

“I went back to grab clothes and a phone, and you’re not gonna believe this,” Sarah started as she sat down next to you. “Rafe is back. I saw him at the house. I don’t think he saw me, but I think the cross is coming back to Wilmington tomorrow night.”

You sat up from where you were leaning against JJ’s chest to face her. “What?”

“Does Pope know?” Kie asked.

Sarah shook her head. “No, I was gonna tell him when I found you guys.”

“He can’t, he’s on lockdown.” You expected everyone to take some time away, and connect with their families before coming back to figure out the next steps. 

Sarah sighed, “Okay, well. Kie and I can hit up Pope and you guys tell John B when you see him?”

“Yeah, yeah. Of course.” You gave them both a small smile as they said their goodbyes and walked back up the dock. 

You and JJ sat silently, taking in the warmth on your skin before the sun disappeared for the night. You really wished your brother would come home or at least check in to make sure he was okay. Sarah had found a spare iPhone charger to give you for the phone you guys had taken from Barbados. You made sure any tracking services were off so Singh couldn’t try and chase you down. 

“Well if the cross is coming back, it’s still on the field. We’re still in this, we can come in and swoop. We gotta get everybody together and come up with a plan,” JJ rattled off as his fingers tapped excitedly against your thighs. 

You took a deep breath and grabbed JJ’s hands to hold in your own. You were thankful for the last chance opportunity to get the cross back, but you didn’t want to risk running into Rafe or getting your friends into the line of trouble again. 

“Talk to me,” JJ held out the word, swinging your hands back and forth before wrapping around your waist tightly to hold you. “C’mon.”

A small smile formed on your face, so grateful for a boy who could read you so easily, who could love you so easily. You laughed as he left wet kisses against your shoulders into the curve of your neck to get you to talk. “Okay, okay.” He pressed one more to your temple for good measure. “I’m just worried about John B. That’s all.”

“He’s with your dad, Y/N. I’m sure he’s perfectly fine.”

You kept your grip on JJ’s hand and brought it up to your lips to kiss the back of it. “That’s exactly why I’m worried about him. My dad is way too deep in this treasure hunt to realize he’s putting his own kids at risk, and John B will just let him because he doesn’t want to disappoint him.”

“He didn’t seem too upset when you said you didn’t wanna go,” JJ tried to reason.

You shook your head. “That’s because he doesn’t have any disappointment left when it comes to me. I know he doesn’t care if I’m there or not. That’s how it’s always been. Him and John B against the world. I was just the backup piece.” You took a deep, shaky breath. “Your dad takes the prize for Shittiest Dad but I think mine might be a close second.”

JJ laughed at the idea. “Well, Ward Cameron might take second but I get what you mean. And it may be hard, but I don’t want you to think what your dad says represents the truth about you. You’re my number one, no matter what.”

You mumbled a small thank you, adjusting further into his grip as if there was any room to. God knows what you’d do without JJ.

"We have the whole house to ourselves?"

"Jesus Christ, JJ!"

--

Your group met back up the next afternoon to figure out what the plan was to get the cross back. You still hadn’t heard anything from John B, Sarah claiming the same. The six of you crowded around a small table with the sun beating down on you. The ferry ride to Wilmington wouldn’t take too long so you could bear the heat for the time being.

“Honestly, the hardest part is gonna be security, alright?” JJ was running everyone through the steps of what would need to go down. “So most of the guys are gonna be at the rail yard.”

“Right, so we’re going to need to find someplace and guard it, maybe a little further down the line, like a whistle-stop or something,” Pope theorized.

“You guys are getting ahead of yourselves per usual,” Cleo interrupted, “We don’t have a way to transport the cross. What did you think? On JJ’s motorcycle?”

Your boyfriend grunted behind you and pulled his hat off. “That’s not my fault.”

“Okay, so other options-”

“Oh, my God.” You all stopped conversing at Sarah’s sudden outburst, watching as she sat up stiffly next to you. You moved instantly, Kie and Pope doing the same to see where her gaze had been to come up with Topper Thornton.

“Why…is he everywhere?” Kiara asked as she turned back around. 

Pope, however, was on a different thought process. “Perfect. Hey, Jayj. I bet you Topper has a way to transport the cross.”

Your boyfriend shrugged at the suspicion. “Actually, Pope’s right. He does have a rig.”

“No.” Sarah instantly declined. 

“Yes,” JJ clapped right back.

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Oh, come on,” JJ pestered, “Sarah, you already got him whipped anyway, alright? So, why don’t you just take one for the team?”

The blonde was not happy with the suggestion. “What would John B say?”

You tilted your head in consideration. “Eh, I think John B would completely understand. It is about the treasure.” You caught her defeated look and leaned over to place your hand on hers. “If you really don’t want to, it’s okay. You don’t have to. But, I think if you just talk to him, he may be willing.”

Sarah let out a deep breath before mumbling an agreement and getting to her feet. The five of you watched carefully, moving out of view so Topper couldn’t see you directly. You hated the idea of Sarah feeling uncomfortable with this but you knew she could handle it. After a few moments of back and forth, she suddenly gave Topper a big hug which signaled an agreement in your eyes. Your friends silently cheered around you, giving her a thumbs up when she made eye contact. 

Maybe y’all had a chance at this after all.

--

It was dark out by the time you guys hit the train yard, managing to situate yourself on top of one of the cars so you could survey everything around you.

“Well, there’s like a thousand trains here.”

“We know it’s car 750X on the track to Raleigh, so now we just gotta find it.”

You scanned the area in front of you. “Well, news flash, guys. We’re not getting out of here unnoticed with a giant cross.”

“We don’t have to,” Pope said, “We can nab it somewhere further in the country. Just gotta figure out how to stop the train.”

“Leave that to me,” JJ interrupted everyone’s thought process. You stared at him, waiting for further explanation. “I got an uncle up in New Bern, right? When he got tipsy, he’d just throw an old chain across the tracks for shits and giggles. And that old little chain would stop all the train traffic in Coastal Carolina.”

Kie looked at him incredulously. “A chain?”

“He’s actually right,” Pope confirmed, “There’s a low voltage current that runs across all rail tracks. You throw a chain on it, you close that circuit. It would read as another train. Crossing lights come down. Science is actually pretty sound.”

JJ clapped his hands together and gave you a small nudge. “Science, babe. I knew my science.”

“Well, babe, we don’t have a chain,” You reminded him. 

“No, but I bet Topper’s dad has jumper cables in the truck,” Sarah pointed out, “Would that work?”

Pope nodded as Topper started yelling from behind your group, remaining on the ground. “What’s going on? Are we doing this or not?”

“Alright, you all wait here. Me and Pope will go look for it and send a signal once we find it,” Cleo said.

Sarah glanced between the six of you with a smile on her face. “Do we actually have a plan right now?”

“Think we do.”

“For once in our lives.”

“Let’s not jinx it, come on.”

Pope and Cleo began to climb down off the train car to search further for the specific area you’d need. You, Kie, JJ, and Sarah remained in place and decided to sit until something came up. After a moment, you laid back against the cool material of the container you were on, grateful for the temperature. 

“Has anyone heard from John B?” Kiara asked after a moment of waiting. 

You groaned and rubbed your hands over your face before letting them flop by your sides. “Nope. Hasta la vista, JB.”

“He left a note at the Chateau that he was going with Big John, but hasn’t come back since,” JJ explained further as he leaned back against his hands. “I’m sure they’re fine wherever they’re at.”

Silence took over, all of you waiting eagerly for a sign from Cleo and Pope. Eventually, a flashlight hit your vision, all of you popping up to see Pope on the ladder, calling you over. 

“That’s it!” JJ reached out a hand to pull you up just as a train horn blared.

“What’s happening?” Kiara asked as if you guys weren’t surrounded by trains that could take off at any moment.

You watched as Pope got shifted around before you realized it was the train you needed taking off. “Shit, it’s moving. We gotta go.”

The four of you clambered down the ladder as fast as possible and over to Topper’s truck. He looked extremely unamused by being dragged into this. 

“Oh, hey Sarah.”

“Do you have jumper cables in there?” Sarah ignored his sarcasm and got straight to the point. 

“Here I am involved in illegal activities-”

“Not that illegal.

“I’m not even close to being okay with this.”

Sarah cut him off by slamming the door shut. She had a set of cables in her hand and quickly handed them off to you. “Topper, if you don’t wanna go, it’s fine. We’ll take the truck.”

“Hey, I just wanna make sure everyone here is okay with ending up in federal prison,” Topper directed towards all of you. 

JJ bit back a laugh and swung his leg over the seat of his bike, reaching his hand out to help you do the same. “Uh, if it gets to that, yeah. I’ll do it for Pope.” You gave him a soft smile and wrapped your arms around his torso, making sure the jumper cables weren’t at risk of falling.

You guys didn’t waste a second after that, JJ taking the lead while Kie, Sarah, and Topper followed in the truck. Usually, you weren’t a huge fan of JJ and the bike, but you’d grown used to it in the time you’d been together. Granted, he drove way safer with you on the back than when he was by himself, but still.

You winced as he took a corner a little too sharp, your grip tightening out of fear of falling. You didn’t go much further before JJ pulled off into a grassy patch next to the road that intersected with the tracks.

“This should be far enough.” You made it a whopping three steps before JJ tripped over nothing into the dirt below. He groaned and got back to his feet, sparing the glance to see you laughing at him. “I meant for that.”

You hummed, “Sure you did, babe. Let’s go.”

The plan was simple - use the jumper cables to reverse the charge so the train would have to stop, hopefully leaving enough time for you guys to unload the cross and get out of here. JJ connected one of the cables to the crossing lights before placing the other two on the tracks. 

“Okay, now all you have to do is change the current,” He scrambled around to get everything in the right order. He was moving quickly, his brain processing faster than he thought it ever could

You looked behind you, the horn of the train getting louder by the second which didn’t help your nerves. “Please don’t get electrocuted.”

“Yeah, no promises with that.” He placed the red cable on first before clamping the black one next. The two of you looked up at the signal, anticipating the lights to change to red, but they continued to flicker green. 

“Why isn’t it changing?”

“That’s literally what he would do. He would do it, and-and then it would change to red. Oh my god.” JJ started pacing in frustration as the train continued to near. “Think think think. Okay, what if I blockaded the track?”

“Jayj, no.” You crouched down by the cables, giving him a look. “How about moving the cable because the train touches both sides of the track, hmm?” You switched the red cable over to the other side before standing up. JJ’s fingers curled around your wrist in anticipation as you stared up at the crossing lights. They blinked green for another few seconds before switching to a solid red. 

The two of you cheered at the color change, JJ reaching for a high five before pulling you into him for a hug. “You’re a genius.”

“Nope, it’s all you.” You kissed his cheek quickly before grabbing his hand and tugging for the two of you to duck by some nearby trees. “We gotta hide.”

It didn’t take long for the train’s brakes to kick in and start slowing down. JJ let out a small ‘yay’ once it finally stopped in front of you, hopefully giving Cleo and Pope a chance to climb off. The excitement was short-lived, however, when a service truck pulled up next to you on the main road.

“Shit, back up, back up.” JJ tugged the back of your shirt, moving the two of you further into the tree line so you weren’t in view. “This was not part of the plan!”

Two workers climbed out of the truck and started surveying the area for the possible cause. “What is this bullshit?” It didn’t take long for them to find the jumper cables attached to the tracks, both you and JJ mumbling curses when they did. They were quick to remove the cables so the crossing lights turned green.

“You’re all set over here. Some asshole put jumper cables on the tracks.”

You turned to JJ as the workers climbed back in the truck, fearful that they wouldn’t have made it. “You think that gave them enough time?” The answer to your question came in the form of the train honking that it would start moving again. “We gotta go get them.”

“There goes the plan, come on!” JJ offered his hand to get you off the ground, the two of you sprinting back to his bike. The engine kicked to life beneath you just as a familiar pickup truck came flying around the corner with a large crate in the back. “That’s Top. And that’s the cross. Get on!”

You didn’t hesitate to climb behind him, arms looped around his waist tightly before he took off behind your friends. The sound of police sirens followed not too long after, the blue lights eventually finding you before you would’ve liked.

“J!” You placed your forehead between his shoulder blades, suddenly terrified about what would come next. He was moving a little too fast for your liking, but you could tell he was trying to keep up with Topper.

“I know, I know!”

The bike moved faster beneath you, JJ guiding it to ride alongside Topper’s truck. You glanced over to see Cleo and Pope in the bed of the truck, staring right back at you. “What the hell are you doing?” Pope yelled at your boyfriend.

“Get ready to jump,” JJ yelled back at you, his eyes not leaving the road. “Top, keep going straight!”

“What?” You gaped at him, not that he could see you. Pope let out an expression of equal shock, the two of you in disbelief that JJ would actually suggest this. “Are you insane?”

“Probably,” Your boyfriend replied back, fully serious about what he was telling you to do. “Get ready to jump!”

Pope reached out towards you, Cleo right behind him as they leaned by the side of the truck bed. “Come on, come on. I’ve got you!”

You took a deep breath, slowly letting go of JJ’s waist to grab Pope’s outstretched hand. You did your best to keep JJ balanced while stepping off, your hand lingering on his shoulder until you rolled on top of the wooden crate the cross was in. 

“JJ!” You screamed the second you got adjusted and watched him slow down to place himself between the truck and the oncoming cop car.

Cleo’s hand guided you into the gap between the crate and the back of Topper’s truck, all of them asking if you were okay. You barely answered, eyes trained on JJ’s form as he slammed on the brakes, using his momentum to pop a wheelie and change directions. 

“What’s he gonna do?” Cleo looked at you as if you had the answer.

“I don’t know,” You choked out, “I don’t think he knows either.”

JJ moved forward slightly to pick something off the ground before gunning it full speed towards the cruiser. 

“Topper!” You yelled as you watched JJ slam the rock into the cop’s windshield. The police didn’t hesitate to yank the car around to follow him instead. “We have to go back!”

“Stop the truck!” Pope and Cleo copied your idea, yelling into the small window that accessed the main cabin. You watched until you lost sight of JJ to the darkness of the night. Topper slowed down a second later. The pit in your stomach grew as he turned the truck around, racing back in the direction JJ was going in. 

“Turn left!” Pope called out as a service road came up.

You could vaguely hear Sarah and Topper arguing before he listened to the change of direction. Your eyes caught sight of JJ on the road running parallel, the cops directly behind him. Your chest was aching as you watched, unable to look away no matter how much you wanted to. 

Pope called out more directions for Topper, the noises turning blurry around you. Cleo’s hands latched on your shoulders, pulling you into her so you had someone to lean onto. You struggled to get air in your lungs with every inch of your body in panic mode. 

You watched carefully as JJ pulled onto the overpass you were about to go under. There was a bright flash of light and the sound of a car horn before a loud screeching noise took over your senses. You could feel the truck slide beneath you, suddenly horizontal on the road.

You moved before your brain even had a chance to process what happened. “Pope, go!” Legs aching as you jumped from the tailgate, the first thing you noticed was JJ’s bike in a tangled mess just inches away from where Topper’s truck had stopped. 

“JJ!” Your throat burned from the force of your scream as you tried to find any sign of him. There was busted concrete under your feet, but nothing that indicated he was even down here. “JJ, answer me! Where is he?”

Your friends descended into panic behind you, yelling out for your boyfriend. Sarah’s arms caught you the second you wavered, both of you hitting the ground harshly. You fought to get air into your lungs as you continued to look for JJ. 

“Maybe he’s up on the bridge?”

“No, no, no,” You gasped for air, Sarah’s hands forcing you to put your head between your legs in an attempt to avoid you passing out. Tears burned in your eyes as you realized that was very much a crash he wouldn’t survive. “Fuck.”

The world blurred for a moment, your body numb as you tried to breathe through the panic attack. It was always so much worse when it involved JJ and any harm coming to him. You shifted, legs digging into the concrete below you as Sarah rubbed your back and tried to talk you through it.

“I wish I could say I did that on purpose, but that was the gnarliest powerslide I’ve ever done.”

The second you registered the voice behind you, air flooded your lungs as you coughed aggressively. Your head snapped up, Sarah moving to get on her feet as you turned, not trusting yourself to stand yet. God damn this boy for being so reckless.

Pope reacted first and slammed into JJ forcefully, “You’re alive!”

“Shit, that was gnarly!” Topper himself was even surprised at the sight he witnessed.

“That was trucking, dude,” JJ attempted to compliment the Kook back before he was getting attacked by Sarah Cameron’s hands against his chest. “Oh, Jesus. Oh, God.” She didn’t hesitate to bring him into a bone-crushing hug, chastising him for being so dangerous. 

You stared up at your boyfriend, unable to move as you watched your friends rejoice at his presence. Moments like this were Earth-shattering to you and took a while to get through. You couldn’t brush off near-death experiences like you used to. 

“As nice as these pleasantries are, we really need to move.”

Sarah reached over to you, hands pulling you off the ground to a shaky stance. JJ was there in a second, his hands replacing your best friend’s as he grasped your elbows to keep you steady. You stared right into his eyes, knowing your own were teary. You could’ve slapped him. “Don’t… don’t you ever do that again. You hear me?”

JJ pulled his lips in tightly and gave you a nod, knowing he had no room to argue. You collided with his chest a second later, a heavy sob finally making its way out as you clung to him. JJ let out a sigh, the adrenaline slowly seeping from his body as he held you against him. 

“Hey! Hey, you kids, don’t move!”

JJ was grabbing your hand the split second a flashlight ran across the two of you, practically sprinting to the truck. He lifted you into the back seat next to Kiara before climbing into the bed of the truck with Pope, telling Topper to go. 

You tucked your legs up onto the seat to curl into a ball, knowing the pressure was the only way to get your racing heart to calm down. Usually, this is where JJ would happily hug you senselessly, but you didn’t have time to resort to that. 

“Hey, hey. You okay?” Kiara’s hand was cold on your leg, grounding. 

You let a deep breath out between your lips, head leaning against the headrest as you forced a nod. “Yeah. Just gotta…gotta breathe through it.”

Sometimes it felt so silly to deal with your anxiety like this, like you were looking for constant attention and reassurance. Not that you could help it, but you wish it didn’t have to be this way. You wish losing your friends wasn’t such a big fear of yours, wasn’t a possible reality. 

You filtered out the yelling that started between your friends and Topper. There was no doubt the cops were set to catch up to you. You didn’t really care how fast Topper was driving the truck, but evidently, everyone surrounding you did. 

Suddenly, the vehicle hit a large bump in the road causing the wooden crate to fly from the back of the truck. Topper screeched to a stop just before everyone flew out of their various positions to check on it. 

You opened your own door to meet them on the road as Pope tossed the top off to check on the cross. To your luck, it was filled with multiple tires full of concrete. 

“What the hell?”

“It’s fake.”

Pope leaned down to inspect it. “It’s all freaking fake.”

“Pope, I’m so sorry,” Sarah apologized solemnly. 

You sighed, knowing all of your efforts were in vain for the Heyward’s heirloom. The sound of police sirens started getting louder, which mean you needed to get back on the move. 

“Y’all hear that? Okay, I can’t be here. My grandfather’s a judge.”

“Dog, would you relax?” JJ tried to get Topper to chill out. “They’re not gonna think some dude in flip-flops is part of a robbery.”

You took one last look, reassuring Pope that it would be okay before climbing back into Topper’s truck to get the hell out of there and go home.

--

You were exhausted by the time you guys got off the ferry. The group had practically pulled an all-nighter with the nonstop running and you were fully prepared to sleep the day away. Topper was kind enough to drop you all off at the Chateau, an awkward conversation forming between him and Sarah before you caught sight of the Twinkie in the yard. 

“John B!” You took off running as your brother walked out of the screen door with a beer in hand. He very clearly didn’t expect you to come at him full speed and the drink almost slipped from his hands when you ran into him. “You’re okay.”

He stayed silent but returned the hug, making you look up at him. It was obvious to anyone that he looked exhausted. He shook his head and let you go. “You were right.”

You didn’t dare ask him to explain at the moment, not that it would’ve been possible since your father stepped out of the Chateau a second later. Your friends lost their shit, Pope and Kiara letting out bursts of excitement to see him. JJ even embraced him a second time, jumping on his back just like he would do when you guys were kids. 

Everyone gave a quick recap of your time in Wilmington before John B explained the treasure hunt he went on with your dad to Charleston. “Yeah, yeah. So, we um, we went to the archives in Charleston, and, uh, it was a dead end. A dry hole. So.”

The tone of his voice was enough to tell you he was lying. You were sure your friends could pick up on it too, all of you knowing each other well enough to tell easily. Pope counted on his fingers. “So that’s the gold, the cross, and now El Dorado. We’re three for three, guys.”

You watched your dad give a subtle nod to your brother, Sarah catching it too as she glanced at him before her eyes moved to you. Why John B was lying to all of you, you had no idea. There was no doubt in your mind that it was your dad’s bidding, though.

Pope threw his beer can wildly, letting out a sarcastic cheer. “The streak continues. That’s great.”

Kie and Cleo were quick to follow him away from the house, calling out goodbyes as they passed. JJ was the next to get on his feet. “I’m going fishing. Thanks for the beer.”

You moved with him to stop him short of leaving. It would be a lie if you said you were comfortable with him walking away from you, especially with how the last few hours had been in terms of safety. “J, you sure you’re okay?”

You could tell he was forcing the smile on his face as he nodded. “I’m good, babe. Promise. Just wanna go clear my head for a few.”

“I’ll be here, okay? Come get me,” You didn’t specify for what, leaving the reason in the air. If he needed you, you’d be there, no matter what. JJ nodded and gave you a soft kiss before turning on his heels and walking away from you. “I love you!”

He paused in his exit to look back at you. “I love you more.” 

JJ was one of those people who just needed space to process. You totally understood, giving it to him when he asked, but it always made you iffy that he was lying to himself. He shouldered a lot of your burden because you were comfortable sharing that with him. He wasn’t like that and dealt with it on his own. You always reminded him you would be happy to listen to anything he said, so the offer was always there.

Turning around, you could tell Sarah had the same hints about something being off based on the way she was speaking to John B. You let out a sigh and made your way inside to hopefully escape all the tension lingering. The screen door slammed a moment after you were inside. You turned to see your brother following you, his jaw clenched, whole body tense.

“Hey,” You whispered in case he didn’t want to talk about it. John B met you in the kitchen, leaning against the counter opposite you. “I’d ask if you’re okay, but I think I know the answer.”

“Um, we’re leaving, again.” You weren’t surprised by his words and merely nodded in return. What you didn’t expect was for your brother to step closer with shiny eyes full of tears. “What you heard out there, it was all a lie. We found the other piece to the idol. And-and Dad gave Limbrey some fake shroud so she could walk again, and I cannot keep lying to them, Y/N!” His voice cracked on your name. There was no point in saying that you saw this coming from a million miles away.

“It’s okay, JB.” You moved forward to pull him into a hug as he let out a few deep breaths. “Don’t worry about us. We’ll figure everything out. Just, be careful, okay?”

John B was quick to agree, recomposing himself before giving you a goodbye and leaving to get in the Twinkie. You were left with the mess on your hands, stuck in the middle of your brother and your friends, just hoping things could hold on a little longer until you could find a way to fix everything.

--

You kept to yourself the rest of the day, taking the time to catch up on some much-needed rest and attempting to clean up the house to the best of your ability. You knew at some point shit would hit the fan again so you didn’t mind the downtime on your hands. This felt normal to you - to be home by yourself with everyone out on their own adventures. This was how everything was before your dad went missing, before you were thrown headfirst into taking care of yourself and your brother. 

Eventually, the silence got to be too much and you found yourself on the path to JJ’s house in hopes to find him there. Evidently, your brother had the same idea. The Twinkie was already in sight as you walked through the grass to where you caught a view of your brother and JJ. Your boyfriend was sitting on the rotting wooden steps that led up to the patio, John B standing near the driver’s door of the van.

They both looked at you once you were close enough that they could hear your footsteps. JJ let out a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair. He looked back at John B. “Does she know?”

You seemed to take everything in at that moment. Your dad was nowhere to be found and if you had a say, John B looked a little worse for wear. JJ patted the spot next to him so your brother would sit and hesitantly, John B did as he asked. You stood a few feet away from them as your boyfriend rubbed his face stressfully. 

“I don’t know what to do, JJ.” John B’s voice was almost inaudible. “How the hell do we get to South America?”

“No clue…but, we’re gonna figure it out. We always do.” You watched the two of them lean on each other, JJ’s arm wrapping around your brother’s shoulder. This was the John B and JJ you’d grown up with; two dumbasses where nothing mattered at the end of the day so long as they had each other. Their friendship had been poked, prodded, and pulled at over these past few months but here they were, proving all your doubts wrong. 

“So. Is someone gonna tell me what the hell is going on or am I just gonna have to figure it out for myself?”

--

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tags: @strawberryfolks @jinxfirebolt18902 @lnnlove@itsmytimetoodream @dazzlingnights @ifilwtmfc @itsmytimetoodream @multiifandomhoe @tenaciousperfectionunknown

#obx3celebration #goy series #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x routledge!reader #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank writing #jj maybank smut #jj maybank x y/n #jj x you #jj maybank x you #routledge!reader #outer banks x reader #outer banks imagine #outer banks angst #outer banks writing #jj maybank #jj x reader #jj x routledge!reader #jj maybank angst #jj maybank x reader angst

[featherandferns]

hurricanes (fic)

jj maybank x fem!reader | angst central

content warning: mentions of drinking and drug use; mentions of sex; arguments and fights; unhealthy relationship

word count: 7k.

blurb: for so many of your memories, bad and good, it feels as if hurricanes are at the forefront. One night, during the midst of a storm, JJ comes to your house, seemingly to bring you one last memory of him.

You hate hurricanes.

They’re unruly and unpredictable; thrashing and destroying anything in their path. Chaos incarnated.

From inside your house, the windows rattle from a vicious blow of wind. Sighing, you leave the comfort of your bedroom to go to the kitchen. There’s no chance you’re getting to sleep anyway. Better brew a pot of coffee and maybe get some homework done throughout the night. As you stand over the machine, waiting for it to brew, you look out the window. It’s dark. Rain is splattered across the glass, droplets chasing after one another in an undisclosed race. You manage to make out your reflection. Bags under your eyes. Clothes hanging sadly on your body. Only recently had you managed to start eating well again, putting on weight and getting through more than one meal a day. So, knowing the effort that you’ve been making, you manage a smile.

The t-shirt you’re wearing is one of your favourites. It holds memories: the fit of laugher that had you in tears one night at a bonfire; the day you got your first A on an exam; a date with JJ. Your finger comes to tease at the collar, fingering the fabric, your smile growing from the memories. It felt nice to finally reminisce about your ex-boyfriend without wanting to crumble. Without the thought feeling like someone was twisting the knife that had yet to be eased out of your chest.

The coffee machine stops buzzing. You look down, coming back to yourself, and pour yourself a cup of coffee from the glass mug. Moving to sit on the sitting room sofa, reaching for the remote, you decide to try and distract yourself with a show. Your parents aren’t home and brother’s at college, granting an empty, quiet house. As you flick through the options on Netflix, you hesitate on one. Narcos. JJ loved that series. Had you watch some of the episodes with him – explaining the characters’ motives and filling in the plot-points from whatever you’d missed. A part of you deliberates watching it and letting yourself slip into some fantasy that JJ is sat by your side on the sofa, his hand comfortably on your knee, eyes glued to the screen. But you don’t. There’re new shows to watch, so why go back on the old? Settling on some Netflix-own drama, you sigh and have a sip of your coffee.

“No way, John B actually thinks he’s found the Royal Merchant,” you snort.

JJ shrugs. “That’s what he says.”

“Where?”

“At the bottom of the ocean,” JJ replies.

“No doy, idiot. I mean where abouts at the bottom of the ocean?” You chuckle, rolling your eyes.

“Oh! Somewhere off the continental drift,” JJ tells you.

He’s opened a bottle of beer for you and is passing it over. The two of you are lounging on your dad’s fishing boat, taking advantage of the nice weather.

“Bullshit,” you say, taking a swig.

“I’m telling you; he’s found it. The stuff in that motel room safe was fucking insane. The cops just pocketing the cash, too?”

“Cops are dirty: shock horror,” you sarcastically return.

JJ laughs with a nod. Then, smiling at you, he says, "well, all I know is when we find the Merchant-”

“-If-”

“When!” he corrects loudly, making you laugh. Then he’s shuffling up so he’s sat right next to you, hooking an arm comfortably around your waist. “When we find it, I’m using my share of gold to spoil my girl rotten.”

“Oh?” You prompt, raising a brow at him with a grin. He nods down at you.

“Mhm. I’m talking fancy dinners and expensive jewellery and that perfume you always check out whenever we’re at the mall but never buy.”

“It’s overpriced,” you brush off, rolling your eyes.

“It’d smell perfect on you,” JJ affirms. Makes your cheeks go warm.

Nudging him with your elbow, the bone digging softly into the flesh of his abs, you say, “well, I guess I could get on board with that then.”

“Just you wait until we find it,” JJ promises, raising his bottle in a silent toast.

Rolling your eyes lovingly at his ways, you lift yours to clink the neck of your bottle against his. JJ leans down to capture your lips in a kiss, sweet and summer-filled, with the lingering taste of beer. You gladly kiss him back, sinking into the familiar feel of your boyfriend. This is going to be the best summer yet.

About ten minutes into the second episode, you think you hear a knock at the door. No; it’ll be a branch having blown away in the breeze. Sighing, you go back to the show, coffee nearly finished and luke-warm. Then, it comes again. Two short raps. Pausing the show, you turn and frown at the door. You can see it from the sofa. There’s a pause, maybe a minute, and then three knocks. You get up and make your way to the door, deliberating who in the hell could be coming to your house in the middle of a hurricane at (you glance to the clock on the hallway as you go) ten to midnight?

As you undo the latch on the door and twist the key to unlock it, you feel your gut twist. It’s as if it knows something you don’t. Then, pulling the door open, wincing against the cold and the wind and the rain from outside as it fights its way in, you come face to face with JJ. The sight of him makes you colder than the weather ever could.

“JJ?”

“Can I come in?”

“Wh—”

Your voice trials off, throat running dry, and you glance back into the house for some reason, as if the coat-stand might have the answers. Looking back to him, brain muddled, you see how he’s leaning against the wall of the entryway. How he’s holding his flask in his hand, the lid unscrewed, and you close your eyes with a sigh.

The rational part of you screams to close the door on him. Do the right thing, the hard thing, and turn him away as if you have barely acknowledged him being there. But it’s not that simple. Nothing is, the moment any sort of feeling has been involved, and you find yourself looking into his red-rimmed eyes. You’re not sure if he’s high or he’s been crying.

“Please,” he says, voice quiet as if defeated. “I just wanna talk.”

He’s dripping from head to toe, drenched from the rain. Hair sticking to his forehead, leaking water down the back of his neck. Hands shaking from the cold and the booze. Wordlessly, you open the door fully and step to the side, making space for him to walk in. After he catches on and enters, you catch a whiff of his cologne. Musky yet fresh; so wonderfully him. It makes one of the scabbed cuts on your heart crack open. Closing the door, fighting to keep in the warmth, you sigh and face JJ. He’s standing there awkwardly, unsure of where you want him to go. He’s barely able to keep his balance right, fumbling from leaning his weight on one leg to the other.

You gesture to the kitchen. “Go sit down. I’m gonna grab you a towel.”

JJ nods and does as you say, heading into the kitchen. You try not to spiral in your thoughts as you go to the boiler closet, fishing out a fresh bath towel. There’s only one thought that you can’t seem to silence. What is he doing here?

A part of you still feels as though you can hear the wind of the storm beating against the thin walls of the police tent. The sirens and the chatter and the panic. The chaos of trying to help John B and Sarah escape, and the never-ending torture of waiting for any news. That they escaped. That they were caught. That they were even alive.

That was a week ago now.

JJ’s not answering his phone. You haven’t been sleeping well. Your nights are nothing but restless, nightmares plaguing you about all the ‘what ifs’ and the guilt of waving them off in the boat, practically sending them off to their grave. It’s a lot for a seventeen-year-old to burden. Your parents tried their best to help you. They brought you breakfast the first morning that you stayed back at your house (they’d let you crash at the Chateau with the others for a couple of days at first, understanding that all your friends needed one another at that time), and never forced you to come down for dinner. Wallowing felt about the best you could do. You just wished it wasn’t so lonely.

Sighing, ending the call that never stopped ringing, you glance over to your trainers. Since coming back from the Chateau, you haven’t left your house once. Hell, you’d barely left your bed. Then you’re staring at your phone again. At the string of missed calls and ignored texts from JJ. You knew him well and knew how easily he could slip when things changed for the worse. John B was like a brother to JJ. Their bond was so close that it sometimes challenged your own and JJ’s, though never in a malicious way.

Getting up, you put on your trainers and lace them up. You had to check that JJ’s okay.

The air feels fresh on your skin, like a plant gulping down water after days in a drought. You bask in the rays of sun that push through the cloudy overhead. Walking to JJ’s was familiar and quick. Soon enough, you’re trudging up his front lawn and walking around to his window. He’d always told you to come in via there. You never knew where his dad was and what state he might be in, but the odds were low on his being passed out in JJ’s room. The windows always unlocked and you force it up and open with a grunt. Then, you’re climbing on JJ’s desk and glancing around his room. He’s not in there.

What is in there is countless empty beer cans and bottles. The useless ends of joints and cigarettes. It smells musty and sad, like nobody had cracked a window in days. You sigh and kick some stuff out of the way (used clothing and trash) so you can reach his bedroom door. Gently easing it open, you glance into the hallway and through to the sitting room. On the coffee table, you can make out the toes of JJ’s boots. Taking your chances that his dad isn’t home, you walk down the hall to the sitting room.

JJ’s passed out on the sofa. His head is leant back, mouth parted in silent snores, and in his hand is an empty beer bottle. The sitting room is just as bad as his bedroom, maybe even worse. It stinks of weed and alcohol and mould. Everything about all of it terrifies you. You didn’t think he’d sunk this low, so fast. Why hadn’t he reached out to you?

He gets an email and his phone pings, making you glance to it. It’s on the coffee table. There on the home screen are the several missed call notifications and ignored texts from you. If it were any other situation, you’d label yourself as psycho. But you knew something was wrong. Could feel it in your gut.

“JJ,” you say. Clearing your throat, louder, you repeat, “JJ.”

He doesn’t stir.

You reach out a hand to shake his boot.

“JJ, wake up.”

Nothing.

Sighing, you walk around so you’re stood at his side and lean down to shake his shoulders gently, hoping to ease him awake.

“Wake up, JJ.”

He jolts awake with a gasp, eyes flying open. His hands come to your forearms in a tight grip, reflexively, and you try to pull away. The moment he registers it’s you, he let’s go. He mumbles your name, voice still thick with sleep.

“What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to check on you.”

JJ frowns. He rubs at his face and pushes some of his uncombed hair back. His breath smells like stale liquor; it half makes you want to cringe.

“Why?”

“Because I’m worried about you. And, I guess I was right,” you say, looking to the pandemonium of the room.

JJ gets to his feet and shakes his head. He’s walking towards the kitchen and you follow.

“You didn’t need to, alright? I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine, JJ,” you tell him.

He pulls open the fridge. His back is to you. The shirt he wears looks creased and well-worn, as if he hadn’t taken it off for days. It reminds you of everything that happened and just how raw the wounds must be for JJ. How much deeper they are, too. 

“Look, I know this is hard for you,” you tell him gently.

JJ grabs a beer and closes the fridge. Cracking open the can, he turns and rests his back against it, taking a swig. “It’s fine.”

“It’s not ‘fine’, JJ,” you say.

JJ shrugs and has another gulp.

“Why didn’t you talk to me?” you ask. Gesturing to him, you add, “you look like you haven’t slept in days, JJ.”

“What’re you gonna do? Sing me to sleep?” he snorts. He’s drunk.

“That’s not the point, JayJ. My parents would’ve let you stay over. I don’t like the thought of you here by yourself.”

“I’m not something that needs fixing, alright? I can take care of myself,” JJ tells you, his voice becoming tighter.

“I’m not saying you need fixing—”

“Are you sure? Cause it sounds like you’re pitying me pretty bad right now,” JJ cuts in. His eyes are narrowed at you as if accusing you of some conspiracy.

Trying to remind yourself of the abundance of emotions he must be feeling right now, alongside the fact that he’s drunk and possibly high, you do your best to keep your calm.

“Of course I’m pitying you, JJ. In the way that a girlfriend would pity her boyfriend who’s dealing with some fucking awful loss,” you tell him.

“He’s not dead, alright? Don’t talk about him like he is,” JJ bitterly mumbles, looking down at his boots.

“We don’t know that, JJ—”

“Well, you don’t know that he is dead, alright? So stop talking about it like you want it to be true!” he explodes. He stalks towards you, angry. “Do you want him to be dead, huh? So you have a little project to work on? So you can come visit your scum of a boyfriend and do your charity work, to make yourself feel better. To distract you from your own shitty insecurities?”

“Why are you saying this, JJ?” you whisper, taken aback. He’s never spoken to you like this. Ever. Not even when the two of you argue. In truth, you don’t argue. Merely bicker, with it all resolved within the day. Nothing malicious and intentional, with words sharpened to cut. The way he’s looking at you right now – as he stands over you, shoulders rigid as if preparing for a scrap – is terrifyingly unfamiliar.

“I don’t want you here, okay? I didn’t ask for you to come here.”

“You want me to leave then?”

“Yeah, I do, actually.”

“You do?”

“Yes. That’s what I fucking said,” JJ seethes. You find yourself pushing back, getting in his face just as much.

“Fine. Drink yourself fucking blind for all I care,” you spit back.

It’s only been a week, and already a chip has been chiselled into the sculpture that was your relationship. The first crack in the mausoleum.

JJ’s sat at the round kitchen table, shivering like an orphan, and you have to keep yourself from instinctively wrapping the towel around his shoulders. Instead, you place it in front of him. He’s put the flask away, it seems.

“Thanks,” JJ mumbles, taking it.

As he rubs his hair dry, you head to the coffee machine. He needs to sober up and you’d found that coffee always worked for him. Hell, you could do with another cup too, perhaps just to keep your hands busy.

“It’s crazy out there,” JJ eventually says, hesitant to start a conversation. You close your eyes at the sound of his voice. “Brian’s throwing a tantrum.”

You’re half-tuned in, mostly lost in the droning of the coffee machine as it brews. You look down at your hands to find that you’ve been messing with the skin around your nails. It was a nervous habit you had, and one that hadn’t shone through in a couple of months. Not since you and JJ had ended things.

The coffee is done all too soon. Pouring two mugs worth, you brace yourself as if preparing for a slap as you turn to face JJ at the table. His hair is now damp, no longer dripping down his face. Wet clothes are still stuck to his skin, outlining the perfection of his body, and you have to force your eyes away. It’s hard to think that only two months ago you would be blessed enough to be able to run your hands under his shirt, along the smooth, salt-scrubbed skin of his stomach. What once brought you pleasure in thought now only brought pain.

Taking the seat opposite him, you slide his mug over and take a shaking sip of your own. Your eyes are down, focused on the table-top, tracing the scratch marks in the wood, but you somehow know JJ’s watching you. Can feel his eyes following you.

“Thanks for letting me in.”

“You said you wanted to talk,” you reply.

JJ nods: you catch it in your peripheral. “I do.”

“What’s there to talk about?”

“Us,” JJ says. You close your eyes. You were worried he’d say that.

“There’s nothing for us to talk about, JJ. There isn’t an ‘us’, anymore, okay?” you sigh. JJ’s already shaking his head.

“There is. You know there is,” he returns in a pleading tone. “Things can go back to how they were again.”

“What?” you almost whisper, brows furrowing in confusion.

“John B and Sarah are back now and…And everything can go back to how it was,” JJ tells you, almost hopeful.

You shake your head, lips pressed in a deep frown. Your fingers press against the hot porcelain of the mug.

“JJ. That’s not how this works.”

“I know things got messed up. That it’s my fault that they did, alright? That everything got messed up after John B…”

Died.

Your eyes dart up to meet his. There’re fresh tears gathering in the waterline. It’s weird seeing JJ cry so openly. He only did it once or twice in your relationship, in front of you. He never seemed willing to let you see that side of him, as if it might make him weak. You notice how his hand twitches away from the mug, as if he might reach out for yours, but something in him decides not to. Instead, the two of you keep your distance; a formal width of space, sat on either side of the table, not daring to cross into the others’.

“We can go back to how we were,” JJ privately says.

Your purse your lips, eyes slipping shut a moment to gather your thoughts. Perhaps this is how Eve felt, when the serpent tried to tempt her with the fruit. Here sits the only guy you’ve ever loved, extending an invitation back into the past, of a time when you were happy, and breathing didn’t hurt, and the thought of romance wasn’t something you shunned. But you can’t go back to the past. Time is forever moving forward, continuous and unchanging, and the sooner you make peace with that, the sooner it can start to heal your wounds.

You never spoke about that first fight. Never acknowledged it, really. JJ just showed up at your house, a couple days later, seemingly sober, and you both decided to move forward. You brushed it under the rug as a slip-up. That he needed to reel out of control a little in order to let himself recover, like the way the earth needs a good thunderstorm during summer to replenish the plants. I mean, how were you to know that it was the beginning of the end?

It was the day after you'd made the memorial at the chateau. Yourself and JJ had slept over at the house, after making love on the pull-out. The moment his hands were on your body, it felt like a silent apology for the fight, and you'd let yourself forget all about it. Waking up tangled in his hold, legs a knotted mess and arm tingling with pins-and-needles from his weight, you can't help but smile. It was the nearest thing to normalcy you'd felt in a long time, since Sarah and John B went missing at sea.

"Morning," you mumble sleepily the moment you feel JJ stir. He presses a kiss to your forehead. His skin smells of dry sweat.

"Hey," JJ rasps.

"You want breakfast?"

"What's on the menu?"

You can hear the smirk in his voice, the teasing grin to his words, and it makes you chuckle tiredly. This was the JJ you missed. As one of his hands moves to grope at your ass, you're laughing, gently pushing him off you.

"Perv," you mutter as you get up. Steal his t-shirt from the floor and pull it on.

You trudge to the kitchen, shoving your messed up hair out of your face, and open the cupboards to search for something good. There's no point looking in the fridge; majority of the things in there will be spoiled. This is the first time any of you have been back at the chateau since a couple of days after the incident.

Grabbing a can of soup, you decide it's better than nothing (though far from a classic breakfast). The drawers and counters are a mess. You sigh as you search for a can opener, coming up empty.

"You got your pocket knife with you?" you ask JJ.

He's lounging on the pull-out, scrolling through his phone. The only thing keeping him decent is the blanket that's half-arsedly flung over his waist. You missed seeing him like this, and the sight has you smiling.

"Should be in the left pocket of my shorts," he mumbles in reply, absentmindedly.

You wander over and drop to a squat, digging through his cargo shorts. Nothing, nothing...Your fingers feel something plastic and tactile. Frowning, you pull it out. It's a small plastic baggy containing a white powder. You're not stupid. It's either coke or ketamine. Your frown seems to deepen. Standing up, you hold it up.

"What's this?"

JJ looks up. Spots the bag. Takes in your expression. "Nothing."

"JJ," you say, tone nothing short of serious.

He sighs and rubs at his face, as if finding an excuse to avoid eye contact. "Look, it's fine, alright? I just need a little pick me up, now and then."

"This isn't a pick-me-up, JJ," you say. You know you sound angry, but why shouldn't you be? JJ having an addictive personality was no secret to anyone. His drinking was bad enough. Adding drugs like cocaine to the mix, and your worry trebled.

“What? Are you telling me what I can and can’t do now?” JJ asks. His voice borders on a scoff.

“This is dangerous, JJ.”

“I’m scared straight, hun. Thanks,” he mutters. Leaning forward, he snatches the baggy from you.

“I don’t like the thought of you taking that stuff, JayJ. It’s a slippery slope,” you slowly reply, trying to level your temper.

JJ sighs impatiently, rolling his eyes. It doesn’t help calm the storm brewing inside of you.

“Why’d you always have to ruin everything, huh?”

“Excuse me?”

“Things were finally starting to go back to normal and you have to fucking fixate on another thing. I swear to God, I never do anything right by you. I mean, I’d just gotten over you losing your shit at me the other day—”

“Gotten over it? I’m sorry, let me just check I’m hearing this right?” you interrupt, shifting your weight. “You got over the fact that your girlfriend had to track you down in person to check you were okay, to find you drunk and passed out? Then you yell at me for coming and tell me to leave, several times. And you remember me being the villain in all of that?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. You didn’t do some fucking FBI work to find me; I was in my own Goddamn house.”

“Not the point, JJ,” you loudly counter.

JJ rolls his eyes at you and moves to stand, pulling on a pair of boxers. “You’re such a bitch sometimes, you know that?”

You stare at him. Did you just hear him right? Before you can ask or even respond, JJ’s walking out onto the porch as if you’re not in the midst of an argument.

You watch as he grabs a leftover vape that’s laying on the window ledge. There still seems to be some power left in it. He takes a couple of hits. You simply stare after him. It seems useless to follow. Useless to keep chipping away at this fight that you’re bound to lose. So, instead, you turn back to the kitchen and let the distance between the two of you gape. Another argument unresolved.

Opening your eyes again, meeting his that shimmer blue in the low light of your kitchen, you can’t bring yourself to do anything but frown, your expression the image of sympathy. 'We can go back to how we were.'

“We can’t, JJ,” you whisper.

“Who says we can’t?”

“I say we can’t,” you reply.

“You don’t understand,” JJ tells you, as if ignoring your words entirely. You’re shaking your head, staring down into your coffee, but it doesn’t seem to deter him from continuing. “I can’t picture my life without you in it. These past couple months have felt like there’s a lack there or something. Like something’s missing. And something is missing. You are. You’ve always been there for me, even before we were together. I don’t…I don’t know how I’m supposed to go on with my life without you in it.”

You’re crying now. Silent tears fall down your face. Muffled pain.

The touch of his hand on yours feels electric, but not in a good way. Not in the way it used to. It’s like the shock that it thrills inside of you, which once was excitement, is now merely pain. You half want to jolt your hand back, but that would be too dramatic. Too much.

“Please. Please,” JJ’s begging, crying too. “I just need you in my life.”

“I don’t understand how,” you tell him, voice wet. You meet his gaze again. It feels almost too painful to maintain it for too long. “I can’t be your friend again, JJ. And I definitely can’t be your girlfriend again. So how am I meant to be in your life?”

“You just can! You just have to be there! You have to be there for me!”

Your lip quivers.

He gathers himself, exhaling slowly. “You just…Have to.”

Have to. Like there wasn’t any other way. Like his planet doesn’t spin without you and his universe is empty of planets and stars. Like his world is void of life and you’re the water that can make his plants bloom again. But it doesn’t bring you joy like it would’ve months ago, to hear him say that. It’s too much, too late. Antique coins lose their value.

“I mean…Don’t you miss me?”

Your vision focuses on his tear-streaked face again. Hair still damp. Cheeks pink and nose red.

“Of course I miss you,” you whisper, half-insulted that he’d even ask that. Can’t he see how much this is tearing you apart? “I miss all of it.”

“You don’t have to though,” JJ says. “We can go back to how it was.”

You finally look back down to see his hand still atop of yours. Touch gentle and kind. He used to be kind to you, all the time. Never would raise his voice at you and would never make you cry. But after John B and Sarah vanished, their deaths presumed, it was like something in him snapped. It’s easier to destroy a sandcastle than to build it, and JJ seemed hellbent on destroying whatever bond the two of you had - the love the both of you shared - rather than trying to protect it.

Your relationship with JJ was delipidating. Like a temple built on an eroding cliff, what was once beautiful and serene is now crumbling away, brick by brick. Pope and Kiara and even a stranger in the Goddamn street can see how dysfunctional it is. What was once affection and care is now venom and pain. And yet, underneath all the animosity, there’s still a love that keeps the two of you in place, fighting for things to stay together. After every blowout, one of you ends up in tears and the other is ironically the only person who can comfort them. Then comes the kisses and the apologies and the make-up sex, and the promises to not fight again, and to do better, and to fix what you have. But it’s all a fiction. The next fight comes and it’s uglier still.

JJ seems almost unrecognisable to you most days. The drinking and the drugs and the recklessness is hideous. Brings a pain to your heart that can only be rivalled by the one that comes when you fight. Pope and Kiara don’t see it as much as you do. It’s like he tapers it down for them, only giving them a glimpse. But you’ve always had the honour of seeing every part of JJ, including this. When you beg for him to stop drinking, to try and get himself under control, he goes on the defence. JJ’s words shoot to kill when he’s mad. And it’s like the venom in his words brings out an ugly side of you, too. Infects you with his anger until you're lashing out. When you’re in blind fury, you don’t care what you say, so long as it’s painful. Words that you’d never think come flying out of your mouth. Things you’d never mean are said with nothing short of conviction. About him. About his dad. About him being like his dad. About John B too, sometimes. About it being JJ’s fault. But he doesn’t hold back either. About you. About you and your parents. About you and your exes. About you and John B too, sometimes. It’s ugly and painful and evil.

But it was always words. Sticks and stones, right? You can sooth any cut from a slander with an apology said through soft kisses and softer caresses. Overlay the memory of an insult with sweet-nothings and moans of affirmation. Only words. So, when the next inevitable fight comes with the two of you at his house, after JJ does something particularly stupid at a kegger after flirting with a girl right in front of you to make you jealous, all because you’d said something the other night, you prepare for the hurl of abuse.

“I was just fucking talking to her!” JJ shouts.

You scoff and roll your eyes. “You were practically drooling all over her.”

“Drooling!?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re fucking delusional, you know that?” he chuckles darkly.

“I’m delusional?”

“Yeah, you are.”

“Are you seriously calling your own girlfriend crazy, right now? Do you know how Goddamn sexist that is?” you snap.

JJ shakes his head and does that all-too-familiar walk to his kitchen. You follow as per. It’s like the two of you follow a script when you fight. Insult, jab, insult, jab, drink, jab, insult, cry, silence, drink, comfort, kiss, sex, apologies, promises, sleep. It’s tiresome and it’s pathetic but you don’t want to leave it, because if you do, then you have to face the alternative. You have to face having nothing. No arguments and no JJ. Somehow, arguing with JJ is better than not having him to talk to at all.

But with every fight comes the fading hope that this rough patch will pass, and you’ll be out of the woods, stronger than before.

“Don’t walk away from me, JJ!”

“Stop screaming at me like a psycho bitch!” he shouts back, slamming the fridge door shut. Beer bottle now in hand.

“Don’t call me a bitch, you asshole!” you scream. "Don't you dare drink that!"

JJ laughs at you. "God, it is adorable how you think I give a shit about anything you say to me."

"Oh, I'm so sorry that I actually give a shit about your health! Clearly you don't, snorting any fucking thing you can get your hands-on like some deadbeat junkie."

JJ isn't replying. Won't fight back. Drinking from his bottle like he can't even hear you. Makes you angrier. Say something, do something.

"Guess you're just living up to the family-traits though, huh? Like father like Goddamn son. No wonder your mom left you."

It takes you a moment to realise what made you stop shouting. What made your breath get caught halfway in your throat, heart thumping loudly in your ears. Then, your eyes are slowly drifting down to the floor, to the side of your feet.

Shards of the broken bottle are scattered on the floor. Beer drips down the wall, spills onto the floorboards, pools around the pieces of glass. The sound of shattering was so loud when it hit the wall. No wonder; it happened right by your ear. It was practically inches from your face.

The shock subsides enough to let tears come. You let out a shuddering breath as the reality hits that it could’ve hit you in the face. That could’ve been your face.

When your eyes come to focus again, moving to glance up into JJ’s, he looks just as shocked as you. Just as horrified.

“Baby…”

He starts towards you.

You hold up a hand, prompting him to stop, and take a wobbly step backwards.

“Don’t,” you rasp. You sound terrified. Half don't recognise your own voice.

That could’ve been your face.

“Baby, I didn’t mean to,” JJ whispers, his voice breaking. “I didn’t…I don’t know why I did that. I…”

Your eyes lower to the ground as your hand gradually falls limp by your side. You look to the glass and beer on the floor. How ironically poetic.

“What are we doing, JJ?”

“I don’t…I don’t know,” he hopelessly replies.

You shake your head. Eyes still fixated on the broken bottle. “I don’t…I don’t think this is love anymore, JJ.”

“Don’t say that,” JJ says.

“It can’t be,” you continue, ignorant to his pleas. JJ comes towards you once more and you shake your head, turning away from him before he can make a grab for your hands. “I can’t keep doing this.”

“I know,” he says.

His arms wrap around your waist. He hugs you against him, nestles his face in your hair, presses some kisses against your scalp. There’s the inconsistent drip of his tears.

“I’m sorry,” he’s mumbling into your hair. “I’m sorry. I won’t do that again. I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean to, okay? I’m so sorry, baby.”

But it’s too late, isn’t it?

Before it was words and that was torturous enough. It was painful when he’d say things to you that he knew would hurt, sure, but you’ve never been afraid of him before. But this, now…You can’t go back. You can’t ever go back from that. It’s with a terrifying thought and a fresh wave of tears that you come to the realisation that you’re scared of JJ. You’re scared of the only person who you’re supposed to find comfort and love in. How does that even happen to someone?

“I know you are,” you eventually say in reply to all his apologies.

JJ pauses, settling on pressing more kisses to your head, squeezing his arms around you tighter, closer, as if trying to stop you from slipping away. But a vase covered in cracks can’t hold water in. You push his arms off you and break yourself free from his hold.

“But I can’t do this anymore.”

He mumbles your name. When you don’t turn, heading to grab your jacket from the sofa, he says it again, loud and desperate. You know he’s crying. He’s sobbing. So are you.

“Please, please don't leave me.”

It hurts. It all just fucking hurts. You head for the door. Shake off his hand as it clasps around your wrist.

“Please, baby. We can make this right, okay? We can fix it. I can fix this. Just don't leave me.”

It’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do, walking out his door. In fact, you think a part of your soul dies a little as you do. Left haunting his house is the ghost of your past self that you’ll spend forever trying to find again.

You carefully inch your hand out of his touch and get up, walking to the sink, mug in hand. JJ’s sighing. You catch in the reflection of the window as he hangs his head, palms covering his face. Pouring the leftover coffee down the drain, you try and gather your thoughts and feelings. They all conclude into one.

“I think you should leave now, JJ,” you weakly announce.

Your eyes glance at the window's reflection in time to catch his head lift. Then, you’re looking back down into the sink. Remnants of coffee sit stagnant in the basin. More tears fall.

“What?”

“I really think you need to leave,” you repeat.

“Baby,” JJ says, getting up. He’s walking over to you and your heart sinks.

“Don’t call me that, JJ,” you tell him. But there’s no conviction in your tone. How can there be, when all you are is a crying, fragile mess.

“Baby, please,” he repeats, ignoring you once more. His arms are wrapping around your waist, hugging you against him. It's painful deja vu. You shake your hand and put down the coffee mug, moving to try and push his arms off you. It feels claustrophobic.

“Stop calling me that,” you whimper.

This all hurts so much. The knife is twisting and turning and driving deeper and deeper.

“I don’t want you to call me that anymore.”

“I don’t understand,” JJ says. “If we both miss each other then why can’t we just go back to how it was? I can make it up to you. I can be better, this time. I can get clean. I'll be sober for you. I'll do anything.”

Finally, you managed to break free from his hold. You turn around, placing an arm on his chest to maintain some distance. His hands are still open, as if waiting to catch you.

“That’s not that point, JJ,” you tell him.

“Then what is the point? Why is this so easy for you? I mean, did you ever love me at all? Why aren’t you as torn up about all of this like I am? Did you ever care?”

His tone is turning sour, just the way it used to during your fights. It all comes screaming back to you. The desperation and the battles and the pure exhaustion of trying to hold onto a handful of sand, that only will inevitably slip through your fingers. But it makes the emotions catch fire. Searing hot pain.

“Of course I did!” you burst, eyes wet and voice fire. JJ takes a small step back, startled. “Of course I loved you and of course I miss you! I miss all of it, okay? I miss the way we were and the way you used to look at me. I miss you when I go to sleep and I miss you when I wake up. But I can’t have you in my life anymore, JJ. All the shit that happened between us leaves a sour taste in my mouth, and I can’t erase the past like it didn’t happen. Even if we did move forward, the past is always going to be there. There’s no way to get rid of that!”

JJ’s sobbing, looking away from you. You realise that you’re crying too. Hard and heavy and can barely catch your breath.

“I mean, God, JJ. Do you know how selfish it is for you to be here right now?”

His head darts back to face you. Emotions a mess, you feel your forlorn expression morph into a demented smile. Through a tearful, self-deprecating laugh, you manage out:

“I was barely just holding it together. Barely just surviving, and then you come here and say all these things to me and have this assumption that what you want is what’s right. But it isn’t, for either of us.”

“But we could just—"

“No! We can’t be together again, JJ!”

Letting out a shuddering breath, you hear your words almost echo around the room. JJ’s staring at you. Both of you are heartbroken. What a pitiful, pathetic mess it has all become.

“We can’t, okay?” you repeat, voice softer. Anger gone.

JJ purses his lips and looks down at the floor. You watch as he nods, closing his eyes as he does, as if he’s admitted something to himself.

“Okay,” he whispers. Sniffs harshly. Wipes at his face. You do the same. “Okay.”

This isn’t how you want it to end. You don’t want him to walk out the door with this as his last memory of you. You can’t keep letting the season end on a bad episode. So, slowly, you reach out a hand to grab for one of his. His arms are hanging by his side, defeated. At the touch of your fingers, his instinctively wrap around yours, and he raises his head to look at you.

“I’m sorry,” you tell him. The tears have now subsided, for the most part.

He gives a quivering smile. Bitter-sweet and painful. “Me too.”

He squeezes your hand in his. Now, there’s almost nothing. No zip of excitement or sooth of comfort, and no jolt of pain. Just…JJ.

“I don’t want you to hate me for—”

“I could never hate you,” you say, cutting him off. Smiling yourself, the expression a mirror-reflection of his, you nod. “There’s gonna be a part of me that’s always gonna love you, JayJ. You were my first everything, and that doesn’t go away. Ever. I’ll always be rooting for you and I’m always gonna care for you. But…I have to do it from a distance now, okay? It’s the only way either of us can move on with our lives.”

JJ swallows your words like one might swallow medicine. Unpleasant at the time but affirms a healthy future.

"I know," he nods. "I'm always gonna love you too."

You find yourself wrapping your arms around his neck. Holding him in a hug, tight and secure. His arms coil around your waist and he squeezes you back. The two of you know this will probably be the last time you ever embrace. Ever get to hold him, and him hold you. Neither of you wants to waste it, but neither of you wants to drag it out, in fear that they may never let go. As you pull away, JJ presses a brief, fleeting kiss to your cheek.

Standing in front of one another, once more, you remember the hurricane. The windows are rattling in their frames, rain battering down on them. It’s intense out there.

“You want me to stay?” JJ wonders softly.

You frown.

“I mean-” He gesture to the hurricane-induced storm outside. “I know how you hate them.”

You smile, eyes flitting down. Shaking your head, you sigh. “I need to face them on my own now, I think.”

JJ chuckles soberly. Nodding in understanding, he takes a step or two back. His hands slip into his pockets.

“Then…I guess I should leave.”

“Are you gonna be okay walking home?” you ask. You meant what you said: you’ll always care for him.

JJ nods, smiling brighter still. There’s still the shadow of pain that haunts the expression though.

“Yeah. You know me, I live on the edge.”

With his wink to accompany his sardonic words, you give a soggy laugh. JJ grants you a small wave and another smile. Your favourite smile. Your favourite person. Then, he’s turning around and walking himself to the front door. You hear the gust of wind battle into the house as he opens it, and the hearty slam as he forces it closed.

Standing stoic in the kitchen as if stupefied, you stare after him.

It’s done.

No more new memories. Only the old, to have and to hold, to care for and to cherish. Right now, they’re painful and visceral, but give it time, and they’ll be digestible. You can comb through them and smile and reminisce. Beneath almost every emotion is a tinge of happiness, be it grief or anger. Heartbreak will simply be the same.

Walking back to the living room, you cuddle up under a blanket on the sofa and snuggle against the cushions. Flicking the television back on, you sigh, sit, and continue watching your new show.

From inside the chateau, the windows rattle from a vicious blow of wind.

“What are you doing?” JJ snorts. His voice sounds like it’s come from the doorway.

You look up from the spot you’ve claimed on the floor, cocooned in a blanket. Your cheeks are wet from tears and JJ’s face becomes void of humour, instead morphing into concern.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” he worries, quickly coming over to you.

“It’s dumb,” you sniffle.

JJ shakes his head as he lowers to his knees, wrapping you into his arms. “It's not dumb.”

“You don’t know what it is yet.”

“Well, even if it is dumb, I won’t love you any less. Just might judge you a little, is all.”

You gently batt at his stomach at his stupid joke, making him chuckle.

“What is it?” he asks again, shifting so he can look you in the eyes.

Your rolling your eyes at your ways when you answer. “I hate hurricanes. I guess I have a fear of them or whatever you wanna call it.”

“A fear?”

“Yeah,” you sigh, wiping your wet face.

JJ nods, humming in understanding. He glances around the room a moment and you find yourself inching closer to him for shelter. A flash of lightning shoots a dart of light in the room and you can’t withhold your pathetic, childlike whimper, closing your eyes. Then comes the doomsday thunder. It’s a short pause between the two; means it’s getting closer.

“Here,” JJ says, getting to his feet. He holds out a hand for you and helps you up. “I got an idea.”

“You do?” You say.

You tug the blanket around your shoulders like a shawl. JJ starts moving the sofas and furniture into a weird arrangement. You simply stand back and watch.

“My mamma used to do this for me,” JJ says through a grunt. “Whenever I was scared.”

“JJ Maybank? Scared?” You jest.

He rolls his eyes as he perfects the formation of the armchair, smiling. “Yeah, yeah. Hard to believe, I know.”

“What were you scared of?”

“The dark. And the monsters in my dad’s closet,” JJ replies. He’s now grabbing any blanket he can find.

“The monsters?” you repeat, humour clear in your voice.

“Hey, I didn’t make fun of your current fear of hurricanes, did I?” JJ warns, pointing at you.

You nod and hold your hands up in surrender. That’s fair. “So, what did your mamma used to do then?”

“She’d make me blanket forts,” he says. “To hide from the monsters and the dark.”

“A blanket fort?” you check, smiling.

He’s dragging a blanket over the sofas to make a shelter. You catch on and start to gather some of the throw pillows and couch cushions to make it cosy on the floor, whilst JJ finishes on the structure.

“Yeah. It’s like one of my favourite memories I have of her. She’d make them real cosy and then we’d watch a movie, and I’d be safe.”

When it’s all finished, JJ turns to you and grins. Gesturing proudly to his creation – bumpy as it is – you grin, giggling a little. “Ta da!”

“A Maybank tradition,” you say.

He climbs into the fort and settles on the cushions. The light from the lamp casts through the blanket to give the faintest glow. Holding out his hand, you take it with a laugh and move to sit beside him. He shifts you so you can lay with your head resting on his chest. His arm loops around your waist and you place a hand on his side. It’s quiet in here. The rainfall is barely audible and the thunder is muffled. It feels like its own world, safe from anything else. Safe with JJ.

He presses a kiss to your forehead.

“So, what’d ya think?”

“I think this might be the most romantic thing you’ve ever done, Maybank,” you reply, looking up at him.

JJ grins. “Just wait ‘til we get that gold. The blanket forts are gonna be insane.”

You laugh and shake your head. JJ falls into an extravagant daydream of the forts he’ll build for you: with drawbridges and dragons and all sorts of ridiculous crap, that you know he’s only spewing because it’ll get a laugh out of you. Settling against his chest, feeling the rumble of his voice and shaking of his laughs through his t-shirt, you smile. What a sweetly clandestine memory to share.   

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[writing-with-emy]

Young, Dumb & Broke - JJ Maybank x f!reader

JJ MAYBANK MASTERLIST | PROMPTLIST | REQUESTS ARE OPEN

Shipping: JJ Maybank x F!Reader Summary: Sometimes songs can Bring Back Memories. Word count: 5,2K Prompts: Fluff: #03 ; #10 ; #22 ; #27 ; #32 Angst: #02 ; #14 ; #34 Funny: #11 ; #18 Warnings: Mentions of Luke, Death, Drugs (mostly weed), some nicknames, metion of abuse, break-up A/N: I'm so sorry that you needed to wait so long for this, but here it is. It is deffinetly not proof read, I don't have the Motivation for that anymore so if your find something, please Tell me! But I#m absoloutly in love with this one! Plus Google Docs always tried to Make 'Pope' - 'the Pope'. Now I have an Image in my Head of JD's face badly added on the Pope.

The Thing about Breakup is, the start of it is always the shittiest part, then afterwards, there were good and Bad days. Today you had a bad day, where you didn’t get out of your Bed and just lie around. Days like this were always the same since your Breakup with JJ. You wake up, already feeling shitty, looking around in your room where the sun is shining through your closed curtains lighting it a bit up, and already deciding that you wouldn’t get out of bed. Your Mom knew already what was up, when she came in to wake you up for Breakfast. She just looks at you, sighs, goes back to the kitchen and brings you your breakfast. She knew on those days she couldn’t get you with anything out of bed. You and JJ were for several years best friends, before you started dating and it was good until the whole thing with the gold started. The day you Broke up with him, you not only lost him as your Boyfriend, but also as your best friend. So when you looked at your nightstand, there was a plate with fresh, and probably cold, pancakes and syrup, a glass of water and your phone. Instead of eating you decided to listen to music so you took your headphones, connected them with your phone, before putting on your playlist. Several songs played while you were just in your thoughts thinking about everything that had happened and staring at your ceiling, until ‘Young Dumb & Broke’ by Khalid started playing. And all the Memories of your relationship started to come back.

‘I can not give you everything, you know I wish I could.’

You and JJ both came from the Cut, that’s where you met and grew up together. With most of the people knowing and helping each other there, there wasn’t a lot of time between birth and the day you met JJ. Actually you guys mother knew each other, they were close, but not too close for your mom knowing where his Mother went, but since this was when JJ was really young, it took a while for you guys to meet. You actually met in 1st grade of Elementary school, you can remember that day like no other. When your Mom came to pick you up, you introduced her to him, but once she heard his last name, she knew exactly whose son he was. You guys waited for Luke to show up but he never did, so your mom took him with her and brought him home. He spent most of his day with your family, except one day, where Luke actually cared to show up. Your Mom and Luke talked outside, while JJ was next to you waiting in the Car. Your Mom knew how Luke treated his Mom, so he just casually shook it off and was okay with the Idea, that your Mom would pick him up when she would pick you up. He always was an Asshole, that would never change. You remember on your tenth Birthday, JJ came as soon as possible to you, on his Way picking some random Flowers from someone's front yard, he checked probably every five seconds, if he had the little present for you in his pocket and didn’t lose it. Once he was at your place he knocked at your Window, which you opened, it was early in the morning, the sun had just risen so he didn’t want to wake up your Mom. Tiredly you opened your window, letting JJ in, he was the only one of your friends to come at such an early time knocking at your Window, and as weird kids are sometimes, he weirdly gave you the Flowers before taking the little box from his pocket.

“I know it isn’t much, but I made this for you..”, he said quietly and a bit shy. You opened the Present to find a Necklace just like his in it. “Thank you, it’s perfect JJ.”, you beamed at him, pulling him in a Hug. You turned around letting JJ put the Necklace around your Neck.

Stuff like this is probably a tradition for you guys, every year on your Birthday, he would always come to you, with some flowers from someone's Front yard, and some self made gift.

On your last Birthday it was just Flowers and a Card, but it was still as sweet.

“You know, I just wished I could give you more.”, he said, looking at you with a kind of Sadness and guilt in his eyes. “JJ, I tell you this every year, It’s perfect no matter what it is, because it’s from you.” JJ knew that a discussion wouldn’t bring anything, because you are stubborn when it comes up.

‘I’m so High at the Moment’ ; ‘I’m so caught up in this.’

You were 15 when You smoked your first Joint, and the situation was pretty funny.

You went to JohnB’s house on the search for JJ, you walked by the twinkie, not knowing the person you searching was in there. You walked into the House seeing John B and Kie on the Couch and hearing someone in the Kitchen.

“Hey, do you guys know where JJ is?”, you asked John B and Kie. “Probably in the Twinkie smoking weed.”, Kie said, looking over at you. “He is in the Twinkie smoking a Joint.”, Pope stated coming out of the Kitchen. “What got you thinking that?”, John B asked, looking at Pope. “He took all the good Pudding with him.”, he just said. “Really?”, Kie let out an annoying sound hitting the Sofa. “Well, I’m gonna look for him there.”, you stated, turning around. “Tell him he needs to stop taking all the good pudding with him when He smokes.”, Pope called after you. “I will do that!”, you said, trying not to let out a chuckle throwing your arm in the air while walking down the Stairs. “How long do you guys think this whole ‘We-are-just-friends’-thing is going to last?”, Kie asked John B and Pope. “No clue, but if something soon isn’t happening, then I’m going crazy.”, Pope said. “Yep.”, John added.

You opened the door to the Twinkie and a Cloud of Smoke came in your face and your nose filled with the smell of weed. “Close the door, I’m trying to Hotbox here.”, you heard him say. “Okay, Mister Hotbox, chill out.”, you said, going into the Twinkie and closing the door behind you. “What’s up?”, he asked, looking at you while taking a hit. “I was looking for you, wanted to spend some time with my best friend.”, you said. “Oh, and I should tell you from Pope, that you need to stop taking the good Pudding when you smoke.”, you added. “Well, then be my guest and I will kick Popes ass, because this shit is good as hell when you're High, you should try it.”, he stated. “Well, there's one problem J.”, you said. “What?” “I never smoked before, forgot?” “Oh shit yeah, I mean we could change that.”, he looked between you and the Joint back and forth with a face that said ‘You can take it if you want.’, holding the Joint before you. You looked at JJ and the Joint and started thinking for a Moment if you really should. “Are you sleeping here Tonight?” “Yeah, why?” “Well, if this shit from your cousin isn’t doing me well, then you are the one taking care of me. Plus, I’m not going High back to my Mom’s nor am I staying here alone, High.”, you set your point looking at him.’ “So, that's a yes?” “No JJ, I’m asking you that shit just for fun. Of course it’s a yes.”m you said sarcastic. “Okay, no need for an attitude.”, he lifted his arm in a defensive mode before looking at you. Once you realized what you just said yes to, you feeled the nervousness beginning to rise in your stomach. “C-Can we like.. do something, before I take a like? Like.. Like shotgun or something..?”, you asked, playing with your nails. “Yeah, sure, would you like to shotgun?”, he asked. “Yeah..” He turned to, so he would be sitting right in front of you. “Come closer.”, he said, patting the place before him. So you slide closer, your knees touching when you sit in place before him. “Don’t worry, you're safe okay? If you don’t want to, can you back off okay?” You nodded. “You know-” “Yes, JJ I know how shotgun goes, I watch movies you know and Stuff you know?”, you said. He just nodded.

Now that is the part you are the most nervous probably about, the part where you asked yourself why you asked JJ to do Shotgun, when you just could’ve taken a Hit. You watched JJ taking a hit, before putting the joint back into the ashtray, he put his Hands on your cheeks to pull your Face closer to His. You have no Idea if you already are feeling something, because of the smoke that is already surrounding you, or the Fact that you and JJ Faces are just a few inches from each other, but your head starts to feel a bit dizzy and butterflies start to erupt in your stomach. You opened your mouth a bit to inhale the smoke JJ exhales, while closing your eyes just as JJ. His hands unconsciously moved from your Cheeks to your Jaw, to hold you more stable. You could feel and hear your heartbeat in your years, like it’s nearly popping out your Chest and if JJ would concentrate on his touch he would probably feel how your heart was racing. But once all the smoke was out of JJ’s lungs and mostly in your, you guys didn’t move, you stayed a couple of seconds this close, with your Hands on JJ’s forearms. But you needed to get the smoke out, and the door opened just in that Moment. You started coughing the smoke out, which made JJ laugh and the Person behind you looked at you suspiciously. “What’s up?”, you asked, turning around still a bit coughing, seeing Pope Standing there. “Taking a Pudding, because I want one, and all we have left of them are here. “Hey they are ours!”, he said. “Then Buy your own, one is mine.”, Pope said, taking one, before closing the door again leaving you two alone.

Fast forward and a couple Hits later you and JJ, are in the Twinkie High as a Kite, if not even Higher. “Shit, I’m so fucking High.”, you said grinning, looking at yourself on your Phone Screen on Snapchat seeing your red Eyes. “Well, we’re Hotboxing and it is your first time, what did you expect?”, he asked. “I don’t know.”, you said while laying down putting your Head in his Lap. You searched for a filter, before choosing a funny one and starting to film. In the Background was some random playlist JJ played from his phone, while he was eating a pudding. You started to film JJ, zooming in on his face when He opened his Mouth and you could see his full mouth with his pudding still in it. “Ew, JJ!”, you said while you stopped filming. “What?”, he asked with a full mouth. “That’s Disgusting. You’re Lucky you’re cute.”, you said laughing while saving the Video. “I’m what?”, he asked after swallowing the pudding he had in his mouth. “You’re cute.”, you said. “I’m cute?”, he asked. “Well, you’re not really unattractive plus you are not Disgusting. You sometimes do Disgusting things Like this, but you aren’t really disgusting.” “Well, thank you, and I must say you are pretty cute too.”, he said. “Well, thank you.”, you said, smiling at him.

‘We have so much in common’

When it comes to Hobbies and doing stuff, you and JJ are pretty much the same. When Nobody can find you at your or John B’s place, they Just need to go to the Beach to see you both in the Water surfing, trying to outdo the other. That all went that way, that you even took the same Jobs. If one of you really finds interest in something that is boring to the other, you still spend time together. That all really went from drinking, doing KEG-Parties, surfing to literal handworking stuff. ‘You always say I’m Wrong, but I’m pretty sure I’m right’

“Okay, but where have you read this?”, you asked JJ, watching him from the hammock walking from side to side. “Wikipedia.”, he said, stopping his movements. “JJ, I hate to break it to you, but Wikipedia isn’t a really good source.”, you said to him. “What, so you don’t believe that barking helps to get snakes to leave?”, he asked. “Well, If you meet an anaconda and she is ready to fight you, tell me how it went if you are not dead by then.”, you said, getting off the Hammock and making your way to the Chateau. “Really, I thought I had at least your Back on that thing.”, he said following you in the House. “JJ, I love you, but I’m not sure about that fact.”, you just added. “What are you talking about?”, Kie asked. “The whole, Snakes and barking thing.”, you said, letting yourself slump down next to Kie. “Really?”, Pope asked, coming in. “Come on- Okay watch the next time a snake is here somewhere, I’m going to show you that my plan is going to work.”, he just said stubbornly like a toddler.

‘What’s fun about commitment?’ ; ‘When we have our life to live.’

You tiredly make your way to your Window wondering half asleep who would knock at 1 a.m. at your window. “JJ?”, you asked, sleepy. “Hey.. can I come in?”, he asked. “Yeah..”, you said walking away from the Window turning on your little Lamp you have for reading. You heard him coming in, nearly falling in his face, before closing the Window stumbling over to your bed. “Are you sober?”, you looked at him scanning him from top to bottom and back up. You saw the fresh bruises on his face, you just didn’t know if they were from Luke or from his way to you probably falling sometimes. “I’m moderately functional.”, he said, falling next to you on the Bed. “I’ll take that as a no then.”, you looked at him. He just rolled his eyes. “Doesn’t matter.. I just want to be close to someone for a little bit.. Is that okay?”, he asked with closed eyes, not noticing how Soft your look became after that Question. “Yeah.”, you said softly, laying down, while JJ moved next to you. he turned off the light, before wrapping his arms around your waist and putting his head on your chest curling in on your side. You always cuddled like that, when JJ needed some comfort after his father hit him or just let his anger out on him in general. “Do you wanna tell me what happened?”, you whispered. “Just..my dad.. the usual you know?”, he said with closed eyes. You just nodded, one Hand in his Hair, while the other caressed his Back. “You know what's funny?”, he asked quietly. “What?”, you asked. “He always tells me.. How you are going to leave me, once you realize how fucked up I am. That I’m just like him, and that you never love someone like me. A-and sometimes I really believe that, I tell myself that even sometimes, but once I see you, and have you in my Arms after all those years..I know that he is wrong, just like me..sometimes. I really want to let you go sometimes, because you deserve someone, better than I am..better than I can be.. but I don’t want to, i don’t want to let you go. I don’t want another guy here in my place, I want you to have me by your side and not some other prick. This shit is probably so selfish but I don’t care, you are my girl, always were, always will be. I don’t care that I’m selfish..”, he started to blurt out. You have no Idea what to say to that, to the fact that he probably just told you that he loves you more than just a friend, but you didn’t need to because just as you were about to say something you heard him snore quietly, which meant he was dead asleep. So you just lied there until sleep won you over on its side again.

‘Jump then we think, leave it all in the game of love’

When JJ woke up, he directly remembered what he just rant to you about last night when he came. HIs first instinct was to get up and just leave, to not speak to you for the rest of the day, or the week, maybe the rest of the year. He just admitted to you that he has feelings for you. But instead of getting up and running for his dear life, he waited for you to wake up and to talk about it. Once you were up and eating breakfast, you couldn’t stand the tense atmosphere anymore so you started talking. “So..”, you started. “So..?”, he repeated. “Those things you said last night… Did you mean them?”, you asked directly out. “That was straight forward..”, he said a little chuckle, leaving him. “I know.. I just don’t want to talk a lot around the topic of why this is so tense right now..”, you said looking down on your plate. “Okay, uh shit.. Well, yes.. I meant every single word of it.. I knew it for pretty much the past years but I just pushed it back, but since the one day in the twinkie where we were so close..where our faces were so close.. Since then I couldn’t think about anything else.”, he confessed. “Well, then let me tell you, that I’m never going to leave you okay? And nobody can be better than you JJ, because you are the Best I’m gonna have. I love you too, okay? Don’t ever question that.”, you said, taking his Hand in yours. “So, who are we to each other..?”, he asked. “You tell me.”, you said looking at him. “Would you want to be my girl? officially.”, he asked, looking at you. “I would love to.”, you said smiling. JJ just smiled at you back, not really realizing that this means that you are together. “Well, Boyfriend, I was Kinda expecting a Kiss by now or do you just wanna keep staring?”, you stated, with a grin forming on your lips. “Oh shit, sorry.”, he said standing up pulling you up with him. He pulled you by your hand to him, before he put his hands on your waist and he finally connected your lips. Your lips moved in sync while you could feel the Butterflies erupt in your stomach, making your knees weak. Your Hands moved in his hair when he pulled you closer to him, when you needed to break the Kiss for air you both just grinned at each other like the lovesick birds you are. “You know, that you are never gonna get rid of me do you?”, he asked. “I know, because you're never gonna get rid of me too.”, you said.

Well but for the sake of the others, you love birds could never really stop acting on the fact that you are dating now. “Hey, did you get my note?”, JJ asked, once you and Kie arrived at the Beach for today's KEG-Party. “Yes, Of course I got it. You taped it to my forehead while I was sleeping.”, you said, eye rolling. “No need for the attitude Cupcake.”, he stated, coming to you. “Well, maybe I wouldn’t have one if you didn’t fully taped a Note to my forehead.”, you said. “Well, how can I make it up to you?”, he asked, pulling you to him after he wrapped his arms around your waist. “Well for the first part, you could give me my Kiss I didn’t get this morning.”, you said. “Well, that is easy.”, he said leaning down, connecting your lips in a passionate kiss. You put your hands on his cheeks, while you hear the others making gagging noises. He tried to show them his middle finger, but you grabbed his Hand and put it back in place and broke the Kiss. “And for the second part..”, you began. “Yes?” “You owe me a dance Mr. Maybank.”, you grinned, patting his cheek, before going to Kie to help her. “Seriously?”, he called after you, when He noticed you were wearing his shirt and lumberjack shirt. “Hey! Those are mine!”, he said. “Well, Not anymore!”, you called back, grinning.

‘Run into sin, do it all in the Name of fun.’

Well, all that was a year and a half ago, now everything looks different and you were laying in your bed crying, when the Memory of your breakup came back to Life.

You met JJ, after probably a couple of weeks. You knew about the gold and what they were planning to do. You couldn’t handle that JJ is putting his life for stuff like that in danger, you hated it to be fair so you distanced yourself from him and the others. But today was the day you met JJ to talk to him about it. “Hey..”, you said, looking at him as he came to you. “Hey..”, he said back. “So what do you wanna talk about?”, he asked, looking at you. “You know exactly what I wanna talk about.”, you stated. “And I told you Y/N, I’m not gonna let John B down with that, I don’t wanna talk about if that’s all you wanna talk about, then I’m gonna go.”, He said, turning around ready to go. “What about us huh?”, you asked. “What?”, he turned back to you. “What is with us? Do you not realize that I’m scared that Soon, I’m getting the Message from one of our Friends that something didn’t work out and something happened to you?”, you started. “Like, what?” “Like, these weird ass dudes, that came out of nowhere for you guys because of the Compass, or Ward fucking Cameron who is mad at John B because, he took Sarah from him. Or that shit with Rafe who is just as sick as his own Father!”, you become louder, and more frustrated from sentence to sentence. “Nothing is going to Happen!” “What if it is one day?! I can’t let this happen!” You feel the tears burning in the eyes from each passing second, with your voice starting to break with each sentence. “What does that mean!?”, he asked, now becoming frustrated himself. “You’re Changing!” “So is the rest of the Fucking World!” “So what? What is your plan if you find the Gold or something else just gonna sell it? Like it isn’t weird that five teenagers are there with gold that is worth millions of Dollars!” “We're gonna figure that out when It’s time!” “You don’t have a plan do you?”, you asked, calming your voice a bit down. “Well, what’s the real reason you wanted to talk to me?”, he asked. “I’m not going to watch you get into dangerous stuff like that and do nothing.”, you begin. “What do you mean?”, he asked. “What I mean is.. I’m breaking up with you. I’m not going to sit here and let you possibly ruin your whole life and put yourself into life threatening danger.”, you said, voice breaking in the middle of the sentence. “What..”, he began. “It’s over JJ.”, you said, before walking away. JJ just watched you walking away, no plan what to do, but once he felt the tears burning in his eyes he put his head back swallowing the tears down making it with a fast pace back to the Chateau. If you needed to leave him, then you should, he didn’t need you once he had the gold and was living the Kook life with his Friends who would never leave him over something.

Once you were Home you ran straight to your room, no hello to your mother or anything. You let yourself fall onto your bed, finally letting the tears fall, sobbing in your Pillow you pressed to your face. You screamed, you sobbed and you probably had a whole breakdown in your bed. You hoped your mother didn’t hear it, but once you calmed down a little your door was opened and closed and someone came to you. “Hey, sweetheart.”, your mother said quietly, putting to Cups of Tea on your bedside table. You just looked at her saying nothing. She sat down on your Bed patting on her lap, which you know what it means. You got a bit up so she could sit better on your Bed, before putting your head in her lap facing your door. “Tell me what's wrong.”, she started, going with her fingers through your hair. “I broke up with JJ..”, you admit with a sore throat. “The first heartbreak is always the worst..”, she told you. “I wish this was the only thing why..”, you said. “Why what happened?”, she asked. “You thought for a Moment if you should tell your mother about the Gold, but then you thought fuck it and you told her. “...and then he just let me walk away, like he didn’t care..”, you cried to your Mother. “Well, he was always a little Stubborn, but that was probably one of the things you love about him, because he didn’t give up so easily..”, she smiled a bit. “Yes, but why did he let me go so easily, why could he leave me so easily for some Random shit..?”, you asked. “People make their own decisions, Honey. And sometimes, they decide to go for a while. And sometimes, it takes time to understand why.”, she answered.

Well that is now a couple of Months ago, you still don’t understand why, why JJ let it all happen but you now can live more with the heartbreak then before but it still hurts. Well and now, all you know is that John B nearly went to Jail because of Ward and that was it. No Idea about how JJ is doing or the other, you just hope they were all good.

‘Yeah, we’re just Young, Dumb and Broke but we still got love to give’

It is a few days later, you knew about John B’s and Sarah’s possible death during the Storm and you really wished you could be there for JJ, but you were afraid of going to him. So you just sit silently at home, while your Mom is at work. Well until you got a Message.

JJ: Hey.. Uhm I know this weird but can we like.. talk or something?JJ: please?

You didn’t need to get asked why, you just asked where and when you read the ‘Chateau’ text you got up and made your way to the Home of the Pogues.

Once you arrived, you first looked outside for him, but when he wasn’t at the dock you went inside the house and the only place he could possibly be. You opened the door to his room and saw him sitting on the Bed, elbows on his knees, while his face was buried in his Hands. “JJ?”, you asked carefully. He lifted his head, looking at you with red eyes and damp cheeks and without a second thought he stood up coming to you and hugging you. You were a bit surprised at first but you wrapped your arms around his neck giving him comfort, while he just cried in your shirt. “It’s okay.. Let it out..”, you whispered in his ear. “I’m sorry… I’m so fucking sorry.”, he said, trying not to let his voice shake too much which isn’t working. “It’s okay JJ..”, you said, stroking his back. “No it’s not fucking okay. John B and Sarah are fucking Dead.. All because of that shitty Gold and I was so fucking stubborn because of it, I not only lost my Best Friend but also the best fucking thing I had in my Life!”, he said, backing away from you walking in his room up and down. “I was so fucking stubborn, that I didn’t listen to you, because I wanted to show you, that you were wrong about everything and now look. JB and Sarah are fucking gone, they are gone! GONE! And…and with all that, shit.. during all of that I fucking lost you..not only my Girlfriend but also as my fucking Best friend! I feel like a fucking looser, that couldn’t even keep my friends from death, nor could I keep my fucking girlfriend. I’m just like my fucking asshole of a father.”, he said, breaking down. As fast as you could you go to JJ, sitting next to him on the floor wrapping your arms around his shoulder pulling him against you just letting him cry for a bit.

You buried your face in his hair, trying to fight your own tears. But once he calmed down you took his face in your Hands and turned it so that he looked at you. “Listen to me okay..?”, you started looking at him, while he was just nodding. “First of all, they haven’t found their Bodys yet..right? So there is still a chance that they are alive and just stranded somewhere…Don’t give up that hope okay..? And second of all..yes you were stubborn, so fucking stubborn JJ. But fuck, that’s the JJ I know, always stubborn for the things he wants to achieve. That’s one of the things I love about you…like every fucking thing okay..? And you're nothing like your father.. don’t ever say that again, you are better than him in so so so many ways JJ. Never ever think of you like that again. I love you, I’m always going to, alright..?”, you said. He just nodded looking at you not really knowing what to say. “I know that it’s probably the wrong timing.. but c-can I kiss you..?”, he asked. “You don’t need to ask, just do it..”, you smiled. A second later JJ Lips finally found yours again, and it was like it never has been different. Like the last few months didn’t happen and you were just two People, mourning over their friends. When You separated you looked at each other, not daring to say something. “So uhm… Can- Can we like try it again please..?”, he asked: You chuckled lightly before pressing your Lips to his again, moving forward on his lap while wrapping your Arms around his neck, you separated your face a bit from his to look at him. “I would love to.. but you owe me a date.”, you whispered. “Anything you want..”, he whispered back. “Unless I screw this up Again, I’m going to Marry you.”, he said, while leaning his forehead against yours. “Well you better not mess this up.”, you said smiling.

#outer banks #jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank fic #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x you #jj maybank one shot #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x pogue!reader #jj maybank x reader fluff #jj maybank angst #jj mayback x reader #jj maybank x reader angst #Spotify #writing-with-emy

[pappydaddy]

style (j.m.)

a/n: this is a test to see if i really am shadowbanned. i have excluded any links and tags.

show/movie: outer banks

pairing: jj maybank x fem!kook!reader

not requested

synopsis: good-girl kook y/n and bad boy pogue jj, something that y/n doesn’t want to go out of style. no matter what brought them together.

warnings: fwb kinda gig, secret relationship (a little), infidelity (kinda), steamy make-out

masterlist found under navigation in bio

next part: i wish you would, found on my obx masterlist under jj and series | how you get the girl posted!

note: i usually link and tag people, but in an effort to see if i am shadowbanned or i need to redo all my links, i decided to use this to test.

not my gif | my header

Eleven o’clock at night, Y/N sat there, eyes trained on the window waiting for the text to pop up onto her phone. Dressed in her best dress with the shortest skirt that she knew he loved, she waited for JJ - the Pogue bad boy her parents hated. She wasn’t sure what it was about JJ that made her lose all control. Made her lose her good-girl facade, but she knew for sure it wasn’t to piss off her parents since they didn’t even know about her hanging around JJ, she made sure of that in fear that they would ruin it. 

  “jj and sandra are leaving the wreck in two dif cars” Kie texted the group chat between her, Y/N and Sarah, before adding three side-eye emojis. Y/N glanced at it, eyes narrowing. When Kie texted telling them that he was hanging out with her, anger and jealousy filled Y/N even though she knew she had no place. They weren’t actually dating. They are just slightly more than hooking up. JJ took her to their secret hangout spot for romantic picnics and she was content knowing that she was the only one he did that for. Their hookups were more like sleepovers with sex, he would spend weeks holed up in her room when John B just assumed he was hooking up with random people. 

  “kick a soccer ball at her new nose on the first day of school, y/n.” Sarah urged. Sandra Hanson was the only other kook other than Kie and Y/N who went to the public school. Sarah is planning to transfer, but she cannot make any promises as of yet. Sitting comfortably in slightly higher than middle class, Y/N’s parents were not too happy about their daughter wanting to go to public school, but they surrendered to her begging. They didn’t know it was a ploy to get closer to her crush, JJ. Sandra had been expelled from the Kook Academy for disorderly conduct. 

  “they appeared to be doing homework but idk, seems sus.” Kie texted back an update. Y/N stood from the foot of her bed, pacing around. She hasn’t heard from JJ for weeks. She hadn’t even really heard from him, only getting a ‘be ready by midnight’ text from him after radio silence. This wasn’t uncommon for them. Y/N had hinted about wanting more for their relationship and JJ had seemed to disappear for a little bit besides them hanging out within their friend group. 

 ‘jj doing homework? Yeah right” Sarah sent with an eye-roll emoji. “ idk tho why would jj suddenly take interest in sandra when hes obvi obsessed with y/n, something is up…” She added quickly, a second grey bubble popping up under the other. 

  Y/N ignored this as the clock changed to eleven fifty-nine, igniting a swirl of butterflies within her stomach. Nobody knew about them. Well, what there was to know about them. They didn’t know about the late nights spent tangled together, stripped of clothes and defences - naked in front of each other. They didn’t know that Y/N’s classic, signature red lipstick stained JJ’s neck and other bits of skin regularly. They didn’t know anything. 

  The distant and familiar rattle of John B’s van excited her. Looking out her window, she could see the dark silhouette of the van turning into her driveway, pausing for a moment. Even with the headlights off, she could see, in the glow of the moon, JJ’s arm reaching out and punching in the code for the gate in her driveway. A burst of warmth filled her heart at the thought of JJ knowing the code to her gate off by heart. 

  Rushing out of her room and down the stairs, she was too eager to wait for him to even get out of the van and meet her at the door. By the time he was pulling up, she was already out the door and locking it. “Wow, someone’s eager.” JJ whistled, eyes shamelessly raking her up and down, checking her out. 

  “Oh, shut up.” She teased, rolling her eyes in fake annoyance. The smile stretching across her red painted lips gave her away. JJ, despite her already heading for the van, got out. She paused for a second, breath-taken away by the sight. She swears he moves in slow-motion half the time. Like a cheesy slow-motion clip of a really hot character in a show.

  JJ was the type of guy that made even the simplest outfit look hot. Blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and a leather jacket (definitely not the outfit worn in the picture Kie sent the group chat earlier). Just three simple pieces of clothing and he looks like sex on a stick. She watched him, slightly slack jawed, as he stretched, his muscles flexing. The white shirt did little to hide his defined abdomen as the moonlight rained down upon him like a spot light. His hands reached into his blonde locks, tossing the perfectly styled hair just the right way (again, much different than the messy hair hidden beneath the backwards baseball cap in the picture Kie sent). 

  The one piece of solstice she had within her relationship was that JJ tried with her. The other girls he’s seen with, he puts in the minimum amount of effort with them. But with her, he tried. Tried with his physical appearance, his emotions, and his intellect. The sentiment warmed her heart, her vital organ glowing like a star (something only JJ could make it do). 

  “Alright, let’s get going,” JJ groaned as he stretched more, his white shirt rising up just enough to allow his lower stomach to peek through. She nodded, following him as he led her towards the passenger side of the van. Opening the door for her, he gave her his hand to help her up. The contact of their skin was like an electric stock to her, making her flex her hand once he let go of it, closing the door. Her keen eyes didn’t fail to pick up the same movement from JJ’s hand as he jogged around the van. “I thought we would just drive around, there is some really rich Kook thing happening on the beach right by our spot.” 

  “Sounds good to me.” She sighed, wiggling in the seat to get comfortable. As much as they both tried within their thing, they both found themselves one-hundred percent comfortable with each other. She knew them too well. This long drive could end in burning flames or paradise. Either sending them into another flurry of sex, heat, and passion or into another pit of minimum contact. 

____

  Two AM. JJ drives them back to her house, his wild eyes seeming to have a hard time staying off her as she lounges back in her seat. His hand, clamped on her bare thigh, squeezed gently, making her look over at him. Her eyes twinkled in the moonlight, her hair flowing around them as he sped down the street. The corner of her lips turned up into a sweet smile, making his knees weak. He wasn���t sure what it was about her, the goodest Kook of them all, that drove him wild in such a tame and domesticated way, but it scared him. It scared him that he loved that red lip, classic look so much. It scared him that he loved her. 

  Pulling up to her gate once again, this time the yellow-tinted headlights of the van reflected back of the steel gate, hitting them. Easily, he punched in the code, slowly driving forward as the gate squeaked open. The van was bathed in a comfortable silence, as if they had been married for five years already. Just enjoying each other’s presence. 

  Wordlessly, they both got out, JJ’s hand finding the small of her back as they walked to her front door together. Nobody needed to say anything. They had an unspoken communication that JJ was coming into her house. 

  Y/N had doubts. She was tired of their circles. She wanted something more, but the last time she brought it up, it sent JJ into hiding for weeks. All the lights were off, just as she suspected as her parents were on a business trip, as she opened the door, letting them both in. Without hesitation, he walks past her as she turns around to shut and lock the door. 

  She could hear the rustling of him shrugging out of his leather jacket, discarding it onto the coat rack he knew they used religiously. In the back of her mind, she considers telling him to leave because she knows this will never change, this will lead to the exact same thing, but as she turns around to see him standing there, she decides going in the circle of crashing down and coming back every time was a much better option. 

  “I heard you were out and about with some other girls. Audrey Glassman last night at a Pogue party and Sandra Hanson tonight at the Wreck.” She brought up, eyebrows raised as she tried to play her jealousy off as intrigue and curiosity. JJ could see right through her, he always could. 

  Bowing his head, he slowly walked to her, closing the distance between them and she let him, standing there unmoving as she watched him get closer. “Look, yes, I hung out with them, but Y/N, I couldn’t get you off my mind for the past few weeks. It’s been driving me mad. I couldn’t stop thinking about you when I was with them.” He told her earnestly, hands falling on her hips as he stepped toe-to-toe to her, his breath fanning her face as they stared into each other’s eyes. 

  She hummed, head bowing for a second as she nodded. She knew what he was saying. She found her eyes flicking up to meet his. She swore that for a second, she was feeling what her grandmother felt whenever she gushed about the time she met James Dean. The same handsome sparkle she sees in the old picture of the two (she was pretty sure they dated but, her grandmother won’t confess). “Yeah, I’ve been there too a few times.” She admitted. 

  It was true. JJ always seemed to occupy her mind. Even when she was with other guys. The way he cannot seem to keep his wild eyes on the road when they’re driving somewhere. The way he fits right into her house as if he lives there too. The way his eyes sparkle when he looks at her. It was never sexual (well, rarely sexual) whenever she thought of him. Sure, she thought of his touch, but it was the comforting feel of his hand on her lower back as he’s guiding her to their private date spot in the dark or the light feeling of his fingertips pressing into her upper back whenever he feels protective over her (usually whenever Rafe is nearby). 

  “What do you say, Baby,” JJ asked, using his hands planted on her hips to pull her flush to him. She gasped, looking down at their bodies pressed against each other. She could feel every bump and dip of his body. She could feel his defined muscles, she could feel the heat radiating off him. She could feel another bump. Gingerly, her fingers found themselves dancing along his back, feeling the way his muscles rippled when he moved ever so slightly. “You forgive me? Nothing happened with either of them, you have my word and I might not have much, but I do have that.” 

  He leaned his head down, their foreheads touching in such a sweet and innocent way, a stark contrast to the way their bodies felt flush against each other, his nose brushing against hers. Her eyes fluttered closed, but she could feel his staring at her intently. Her eyes fluttered closed as she relished in the feeling. His breath fanned over her lips as he watched her intently, not doing anything until he knew for sure she was okay. Slowly, almost non-existent, there was a nod. “Yeah.” She breathed out. 

  “Good,” He breathed out in the same way. “Now, let me show you exactly why you were on my mind when I was with them.” He whispered seconds before their lips crashed together in a feverish kiss. It was messy, hands roaming everywhere, lips mushed together so hard it almost hurt. Tongues and a little bit of spit moving from mouth to mouth, but they didn’t care if drool was rolling down either of their faces. They were too absorbed in the feeling of each other. 

  Chests rose and fell rapidly and it was only a few seconds in, but that’s how passionate they are. Hums, moans, and panting were the only sounds in the quiet house as her Hands gripped the bottom of JJ’s t-shirt, pulling it up. Her knuckles dragged along his abs (both for her pleasure and his) making his muscles ripple and his back hunch slightly. Humming into the kiss at the feeling, Y/N nearly ripped the shirt off him, making him pull away to get rid of the barrier before resuming the kiss with more vigour, forcefully lifting her up into the air, her legs wrapping around his waist as some sort of automatic response. His arms tightened around her waist, pushing her against him. Her pelvis rolled against his clothed bulge, making him whine slightly at the feeling. 

  The air in the room was already thick with the smell of arousal and sex. Their skin became sticky as they worked each other up, hands roaming each other’s bodies like someone exploring new land. It was as if they were a force when together, possessing the power to make any room seem like a sex room in under ten seconds. 

  With her back pressed into the wall suddenly, JJ’s weight pressing her flush against it, he rolled his pelvis into hers making her tear her lips away from him, the feeling of his clothed, jean-clad pelvis rolling against hers that was basically only covered by her panties due to her skirt riding up send shock waves through her body. His lips latched onto her throat without a second thought, inciting another gasp from her - a sound that drove him mad. Another quick roll and she cried out, body falling forward onto him. Tears pricked her eyes as her head pulled back, hitting the wall. JJ’s tongue licked the spot he knew made her weak, humming at the sound of her whimper before biting it gently, enticing a gasp from her. Her breasts pressed against him harder, her fingers disappearing into his blonde hair as he continued his attack on her neck. 

  Sure, she should have told him to leave, but that wouldn’t have fixed anything. There is no way to pull them apart. No matter how many times she tells him to leave, they just keep coming back because they will never go out of style. Never. Now, be that the sheer magnitude of their passion and feelings or the pull of the stereotype they so perfectly fit, Y/N had no idea, but she never wanted it to stop.  

#jj maybank imagines #jj maybank angst #jj maybank blurbs #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank #jj maybank x you #obx fic #jj maybank x kook!reader #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x reader fluff #jj maybank fics #jj maybank fic #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank headcanon #jj maybank blurb #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank imagine angst #jj maybank oneshot #jj maybank oneshots #jj maybank one shot #jj maybank outer banks #jj maybank obx #obx 3 #outer banks 3

[witchersoldier]

To Whatever End

jj maybank x routledge!reader

SUMMARY: JJ loves you. But instead of just saying it, he reads your favorite books.

WARNINGS: (+16) kinda blasphemy but not really, reader reads sjm, guys forcing themselves on reader, drinking, rushed writing, not proof read (i just never do it) and that's all I guess. let me know if I missed something.

WORD COUNT: 1.9k

AUTHORS NOTE: this is my first jj fic, hope that's okay and not all that ooc. i used sarah j maas and her books bc they're just my favorite, if you don't like it just scroll down. english is not my mother tongue.

You can’t remember when you developed a passion for reading, it just happened. Now everywhere you go you carry a book with you, even if there’s absolutely no chance you’ll get to read it. Now, as for JJ, he absolutely remembers when he started to read books.

It was on a Friday last summer; everyone was gathered at the Chateau. John B., Pope and JJ were drinking at the porch while you, Kie and Sarah were down by the dock doing God knows what. When the sound of your laughter reached JJ’s ears he couldn’t help but gravitate towards you, pure admiration and curiosity guiding him. “Hey ladies. Just wanted to check if you still got everything you need down here? You know, drinks and snacks and- what’s that in your hand?” he asked, pointing to the huge book you held open, some phrases highlighted in a pastel red color. “I’m not surprised you don’t know what a book is.” Kiara bickered at the blonde, who scoffed and feigned offense, “I meant is this some kind of bible or some shit like that? It’s just I didn’t picture you as the religious type.” He offered the three girls an innocent smile. You’re one to always have a comeback at the tip of your tongue, but how could you say anything when JJ Maybank was looking down at you with such a pretty smile on his adorable face? “It’s not a bible, it’s fae-” Sarah brought you out of the trance as quickly as JJ put you in it. Was she really about to drop the ‘fae porn’ bomb on him like that? “It’s some shit like that, yeah” you smiled innocently at him, hoping he would just drop the subject. He squinted his eyes in an attempt to read the tittle of the book, but all he got was Sarah J. something and indistinguishable yellow letters. “We’re actually out of beer, will you bring us some?” Kiara asked a devilish smirk on her lips. JJ long forgot that’s the excuse he used to being there with you and not chatting with the guys. “I’m not your waitress, go get it yourself.” When he realized he blew his cover, there was no turning back. Sarah and Kie were already teasing him. “Well, then something else must have brought you here, right?”, “I think it was someone else, Kie.” Sarah nudged your shoulder, you pretended to be so deep in your book to notice the conversation. “More beers coming right up.” The blonde boy barely finished his sentence before sprinting back to where the guys sat.

He didn’t go back with your drinks, instead he sent John B., your brother.

•••

Later that night he unlocked his phone, googling the mysterious “Sarah J” he managed to read from your book earlier. And that’s how it started.

He read the A Court of Thorns and Roses book series. And read it quite fast, for someone who never held a book before. He would never admit it out loud, but he liked it. At first he was just curious about why you got all dodgy when he asked about the book-now he understood why-, but when he got through with the first one, he liked it. Liked to the point where he found himself sneaking into your room when nobody was home, just to see what else you had in your shelf. His eyes landed on the familiar Sarah J. Maas name, and he found a whole new book series. Throne of Glass. The series was huge. He grabbed the “Heir of Fire” one and stared flipping through the pages. Lots of highlighted texts in a color that match the cover, tabs neatly sticking out and some of your thoughts written on the pages. You were so passionate about this, he found it so endearing. JJ would give it a try. For you. And a little bit for him, too.

JJ was dropping hints your way, practically begging for you to catch up on what he’s been doing, but you never seemed to notice. Not when he said “you could rattle the stars, if only you dared” when you were worried about not being enough to get the job you wanted. Or even when he started calling you fireheart –because you reminded him of Aelin. Little did he now that your heart skipped a beat at the nickname.

The time he’s visibly caught your attention while quoting a book, the moment you knew what he was doing, was at a kegger.

You were dancing with Kie trying to enjoy the night, but you couldn’t stop looking at JJ, hoping that maybe this would be the day that he acted on you for real, not just the friendly flirting you were used to. Perhaps you should make the first move, after all he said you could rattle the stars, and you believed him dearly, so maybe you had a chance to rattle his heart. The only obstacle was the beauty he was talking to, looking too smiley for your liking. A drink. That’s what you needed. Then you could try and pour your heart out to him.

You were by the keg getting some more beer when you heard your name being called. Topper and Kelce. A blessing they were at least missing Rafe this time. The three of them always tried to have their way with you, but failing every time because your brother was always there to fight them away. Not tonight. Tonight he was with Sarah, and you were on your own.

Pretending not to hear them, you began walking to the opposite direction they were coming. “Hey Y/N, where are you going? The night is still young.” Exclaimed Topper, grabbing your wrist to stop you from going any further. Kelce came up behind you, his hand on your back pushing you to walk with him now. “Rafe’s moving the party back to his place, we would love it if you could join.” The way Kelce said that to you made you shiver in disgust and fear, Topper let go of your wrist and walked by your side, opposite to where his friend was. Your brain was running wild inside your head, trying to come up with a plan to get out of this situation. They weren’t holding you tight, so if you could just turn around between them fast enough and run back into the crowd, you’d be safe.

You kept walking with them for a few more seconds before making a run for it. And you managed to escape them, only to run into a hard chest. At first you thought it was Rafe, but then you heard his strong voice reverberating in his chest, words that had you gasping for air. “There you are. I’ve been looking for you.” JJ looked into your eyes and you knew he was doing it to make sure you weren’t hurt; he would always search for answers in your eyes. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder protectively and in this moment you felt so safe, like nothing would ever get to you, he would not allow it. “Thank you for finding her for me.” He said softly, it was meant more for you to hear than for Kelce and Topper, who were standing there frustrated.

Before they could say anything or start a fight, you and JJ ran back to into the crowd. You were laughing now, as if the bad situation you were in just a few seconds ago never really happened. “Alright, Rhysand. Is there something you would like to tell me?”.

And JJ told you how he started reading after that day by the dock. You didn’t hide your surprise and didn’t hide how much joy he brought you with just a simple gesture.

Something changed since that day. You and JJ grew closer and closer. You’ve always been close to him, since he was your brother’s best friend, but still you felt like your relationship with him leveled up. And all your friends could see it too. So why can’t any of you make that final move? You felt stuck between the friend zone and a relationship. There was always those lingering touches, hugs that lasted too long, nights you two spent alone talking about your favorite character and couples, but you never talked about your feelings.

That changed the moment he decided to make the most reckless thing in his life.

•••

You and the other pogues -plus Topper, who you barely acknowledged the whole night-, just stole the cross from that train. You were running from the cops in Topper truck when JJ turned around on his bike to create a distraction. You felt your heart go with him as soon as the police car turned to chase him. “Turn the car around” you screamed to no one in particular. There was arguing going on around you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to make out what they were saying, until Topper suddenly turned around and begin racing towards JJ, towards you heart. You remained calm on the outside, but inside you were panicking, you felt like your whole body was shaking. There were so many voices screaming for you to keep focused, and then there was a loud crash, the car stopped. The whole world seemed to stop around you as you looked around to see JJ’s totaled bike, concrete blocks around it and the guy you fell in love with nowhere to be seen.

You jumped out and ran to the bike, desperately looking around. “Where’s JJ?” you pleaded with tears in your eyes. “Where is he?” pacing around, calling for him so lost in your own fear that you didn’t hear groans and footsteps until you were spun around by someone. By him. He looked like he fell off a cliff. He kind of did. JJ’s body was hurting all over, but what hurt most was seeing you crying looking so lost. “Fireheart, why do you cry?” He didn’t mean to quote one of the most heartbreaking scenes of a book in a moment like this, it just came to him naturally. After all, you are his fireheart and he can’t stand to see you cry. His words hit you straight in the heart, you couldn’t speak. So you just moved on automatic, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him like your life depended on it. JJ didn’t waste time and kissed you right back, bringing you closer by wrapping his sore arms around your waist. The kiss was the best of the both worlds. Sweet and caring, but filled with desire and a salty taste, coming from your tears still cascading down your cheeks. Breaking apart the kiss was the last thing you wanted right now, but you had to. “Don’t you ever do that again, Maybank. I thought I lost you before I even got the chance to have you” You tried to sound serious and mad, but you couldn’t, happiness filling your bones and sipping out in the form of smiles and soft touches on his hair, now all dusty.

“Don’t worry, I’d never leave you. I’m with you. To whatever end.” He said with that cheeky grin you adored. “I love you, J.” you gave him a quick kiss. “And I love you,” he seemed like he was about to say something else, but you shut him up with a snarky comment. “I swear, if you’re about to say ‘Thorns and all’ I’ll be the one throwing you off the next bridge”.

#jj maybank x reader #outer banks #jj x reader #jj maybank #rudy pankow #a court of thorns and roses #sarah j maas #bookish #throne of glass #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank x reader fluff

[shellxrls]

👙👙👙👙👙👙

i think about this jj fic WAAAYYYYYY too often shkdhsjbdjd i’ve read it sooooo many times ugh i love it

ohh i have a love-hate relationship with angst bcuz it alwaysss gets to me :((( thanks for the rec and i agree it was a great fic considering its purpose was to be heartbreaking, but it was honestly so sad :(

#asks.ᐟ ⋆｡˚𖦹 #;oceandriveab #;obx celebration #👙 #this is jj #jj maybank angst #jj maybank x reader angst

[buckybarnesandmarvel]

Coming soon

#jj maybank #jj mayback x reader #jj maybank x reader fluff #jj maybank x reader angst #jj maybank x reader smut #jj maybank x you #jj maybank x you fluff #jj maybank x you angst #jj #jj maybank x you smut #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x y/n fluff #jj maybank x y/n angst #jj maybank x y/n smut #obx #outer banks #buckybarnesandmarvel

[obx-paradise]

Masterlist

Key: angst- 🌊 fluff- 🐚 (I don't do smut)

Rafe Cameron

What Happened? 🌊

Summary: You and Rafe have always been close but when you both get involved in the chase for the gold on opposing teams, some things change

#jj maybank x reader angst #rafe cameron #rafe obx #rafe outer banks #rafe x reader #jj maybank #jj x reader #outer banks imagine #obx #jj maybank x pogue!reader #rafe cameron x pogue!reader #angst #fluff #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron angst

[pixiekiwi]

jj maybank x reader except its based off of hopeless wanderer by mumford and sons.... 

https://open.spotify.com/track/7rME25EmgXGVPQqKtU4CIK?si=e5b5d998da394b61 

coming so fucking soon

#jj maybank x reader #jj maybank angst #angst one shot #jj maybank x reader angst #kpixie rambles

[l0caltiredgirl]

when i want fluff/angst fics and all i’m getting is smut

the struggle is real

#don’t get me wrong #smut is great #but a girl wants some angst and fluff #joel miller x reader #din djarin x reader #matt murdock x reader #steven grant x reader #steve harrington x reader #spencer reid x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #derek morgan x reader #jj maybank x reader #rafe cameron x reader #tasm!peter parker x reader #peter parker x reader #marc spector x reader #javier pena x reader #ellie williams x reader #poe dameron x reader #cassian andor x reader #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #logan howlett x reader #daryl dixon x reader #simon riley x reader #bruce wayne x reader #l0caltiredgirl #mike schmidt x reader #sam carpenter x reader #emily prentiss x reader

[cosmicmunsonwrites]

can you maybe write something about jj always wanting to eat his girl out if that's okay:D

oh so close

pairing(s): bf!jj maybank x gf!fem!reader

warnings: implied oral, pet names, talks of sex

summary: jj begs to return the favor to his favorite girl.

authors note: thank you for the request, hun! enjoy :))

not edited

do not copy my works. i do not condone rewrites, translations, or edited versions. all my content is my content that i wrote.

not my gif

“please, please, please?” jj begged with his head laying on your stomach.

you chuckled to yourself. “no,” you replied.

“why?” he whined.

“maybe cause you just did it this morning? i need a break too,” you said, stifling a laugh.

he pouted and groaned. “you’ve had like 7 hours between then. you’ll be fine, baby.”

“i’m still sensitive, jj,” you reminded him.

he glared up at you. “even better,” he stated. “please, pretty girl? you know i’ll make you feel good.”

“i know you will,” you replied. “but you already did this morning.”

“you can go twice in one day, i know you can. you’ve done it before,” he said with a sweet smile.

you hated how soft and pretty he looked like this. you hated how you couldn’t help but say yes when he was looking at you like this, all pouty with glossy eyes.

“fine.”

the smile that took over his lips was huge as he urgently began to move down to lay between your legs. “trust me, sweetheart. i’ll make it so much better than this morning.”

#gracie writes jj maybank 🌸 #gracies asks and requests 💌 #jj maybank #jj maybank angst #jj maybank blurb #jj maybank fanfic #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank imagines #jj maybank obx #jj maybank x you #obx #jj obx #jj maybank fic #jj maybank one shot #obx jj maybank #jj maybank x reader