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#jokes
insomniac-arrest · 5 hours ago
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May I present to you the antithesis to “there are many benefits to being a marine biologist.” The sad rock crew.
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badjokesbyjeff · 9 hours ago
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I witnessed an actual murder in real life and didn't tell anyone about it.
Crows are common in my area so it wasn't a big deal.
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a--z--u--l · 2 days ago
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Imagínate que tu hija tenga un novio como tú. ¿Sonreíste? ¿No? Entonces cambia, maldita basura.
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baddadjokez · a day ago
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I just just scrolling through YouTube and saw a video titled "how to stop procrastinating"
So I added it to my watch later list.
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satanismytrophywife · 2 days ago
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Achilles: stop saying I have a favourite soldier
Achilles: I like Patroclus and all you non-Patrocluses equally
Patroclus: *thumbs up*
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stagkingswife · 12 hours ago
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Sometimes you just need to be the ancient liminal deity of rot, decay, and rebirth that you want to see in the world.
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fablefire · a month ago
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I’ll take a Maxolotl to go, please.
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insomniac-arrest · 4 months ago
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how come cats look outside and start vibrating their little mouths so much and so quick while sounding like they are printing copies from a fax machine. why do birds do that to them.
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badjokesbyjeff · 8 hours ago
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After you die, the last part of your body to stop working are your pupils because...
...they dilate!
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baddadjokez · a day ago
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Did you know that when you die, your body parts all die at different times? You know which part dies last?
Your pupils. They dilate.
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