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[31.03.20]  MARCH MADNESS

Due to a series of unfortunate events, we find ourselves somewhat ‘locked’ in our own homes. Because of COVID-19 we now find ourselves in isolation in hopes of ‘flattening the curve’ through social distancing. For the first two weeks it has been a struggle to find a new routine and resist laziness.

In those two weeks I was all the more obsessed over social media to check what is happening in my home country. I find myself endlessly scrolling through Facebook and twitter and see constant ranting because of the inefficiency of the government and ceaseless bickering due to differing political views. There’s a plethora of nonstop call outs here and there, magnified cancel culture of ignorant privileged people, mediocre tiktok videos, etc. It’s a heavily anxiety inducing shitshow to say the least. And at some point I took a step back from all the social media toxicity. Times like these its very easy to feel helpless because you feel like even if you donate or help in any way you can, it feels like its not enough. It’s easy to be swallowed by guilt for things that are in fact, out of your control. Shit like that is not cute for your mental health.

So in my usual form of therapy, I yet again wrote about my feelings. I can’t stress enough how writing on a journal on just about everything feels so therapeutic and calming. I also added some five minute stretches every morning and it really helps boost my mood for the day. Even if the day mostly consists of staring at my laptop. Also checking on family and catching up with friends always gets my spirits back. This home quarantine situation really can take its toll on you and right now it’s just about finding balance between staying positive (and productive) and acknowledging those negative feelings.

Hoping for better news ahead!

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sun // 05 apr

greetings from inside the blanket fort i’ve been living in all weekend. it seems that even when i’m indoors 24/7 i still don’t want the weekend to end.

it’s been raining here pretty much nonstop since yesterday afternoon, and as a result my apartment becomes very dim and gray. so i’ve rectified that by lighting candles and using a small reading light with a nice yellow glow. it’s surprising what lighting can do for my mood. i’ve also been on a bit of a news detox this weekend, since reading headlines has been overwhelming lately. luckily i’m beginning to feel energized enough to take on this week. waiting patiently to mail these letters out and get back into scientific lit and project brainstorming for work.

there’s always so much pressure to keep the ball rolling through the weekend and exercise productivity as maximally as possible, but it’s also okay to do nothing. it’s okay to wear pajamas all day. it’s okay to decompress, to sit and just listen to yourself breathing. it’s okay to relax.

anyway, prrrobably going to spend the rest of the day in this fort reading and eating snacks.

mondaysandmelancholy
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day 4&5 of 100

yesterday, I didn’t do much I spent all the day with my family and helping my mum in the chores,we did stuff like laundry washed all curtains, sheets etc I helped her in cooking ay in other stuff as well, that was still productive to me but not any academic productivity.

today, I finally finished that chemistry chapter and made its notes, did some korean and declutter my shelves and deleted all the junk (it seems simple but take a lot of time to do so) and yea that’s pretty much it😗

🎶: everything I wanted_ Billie elish

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0 4 / 0 4 / 2 0

Bullet journal

Hello, guys!

Sorry for being so inactive… let’s just say that this past few days haven’t been nice. There’s the quarantine thing, I have a lot of homework and I’ve been feeling pretty down lately.

But I’m back and I’ll try to be more active.

This is my April spread… it’s empty now but at the end of the month it will be full with notes and doodles.

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4 / 4 / 2020

hey! it’s been a hot minute since i posted some original content on here. i’m waiting for a new journal, a stencil and some metallic markers to come in the mail. i’ll probably be waiting awhile, considering amazon is putting the priority on more important, medical stuff, but that’s okay! in the meantime, i’ve been playing around with some cover ideas digitally.

it’s a bit messy, but i’m pretty happy with this one. i feel like it encapsulates a lot of who i am, haha. i was considering putting a bong in the empty space, but it was hard to find some clipart that matched this aesthetic. i’ll keep working on it, though!  (o˘◡˘o)

what does your journal cover look like? did you go out of your way to find the prettiest one, or make it your own? do you prefer patterns or plain?

bard-studies
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Working on a new smash-journal out of one of my big sketchbooks. It’s one of those books you’re too nervous to draw in because the pages are so large and of such fine quality… and I’m going to happily commit sacrilege to it with mixed media collaging.

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thu // 02 apr

the nintendo switch lite in yellow is sold. out. everywhere. i know i only started wanting it this morning and that it’s a totally impulsive and irrational thing for someone who plays video games as infrequently as i do to want and that this is probably for the better but. still kinda bummed about it.

anyway. other things i did today:

  • snuck some reading in
  • listened to yiruma for the first time in a while. i forgot how calming his music is. 10/10 recommend especially in these times of constant anxiety
  • signed up for a library card! i had to call the library to activate it though and making phone calls is literally torture to me
  • phone call check-in with my director. apart from work, we talked about a bunch of other random things for a good half hour. she told me the story of how the 9-year old, 4ft tall bamboo plant in her shared office at work was only five inches tall a couple of years ago hahah.
  • got groceries and test-ran homemade cloth masks my roommate sewed last night using the nytimes pattern. a lot more people are wearing masks out per the county ordinance that went into effect the other night. it still gives me a weird feeling seeing masks on everybody out and about. it’s just not something that’s ever been commonplace where i’m from.

another week almost done. i kind of can’t believe it’s already thursday. now time to start on some homemade cards to mail my work friends…

mondaysandmelancholy
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