Thursday, October 19th, 2017 - what’s your drug?
aaaaahh I haven’t made any journal spreads about bts for weeks already :((
I’ve only just been binge reading books and wattpad stories these days hdsjhdshdshdsh
6/5/20 - Money, Time, and Trumpers
I’m literally thinking about everything now based upon how much I make an hour before taxes.
How many hours of work is that? It’s easy to forget when you’re salaried. Is that thing really worth 1 hour, 3 hours, 4 hours of my time? More? I’m basing this shit on how many fucking hours did I have to work to pay for that thing. I think that putting time as a transaction is of a bigger value. Like wow… you wasted exactly 35 minutes of your life for that?
I think it’s easier to see waste that way. I’m in the middle of downsizing. I’m also buying shit. Marie Kondo would be “so proud” jk. I have so much time that its forcing me to reflect on a lot of things. Fuck yeah for perspective. I’m embracing that. I’m back in my high points of mental health. Good place. I’m embracing it and trying to take healthy steps to maintain my self care.
This is just making me think about how I became a workaholic while dating my ex because of his nagging and my depression, which resulted me in using constant work to block out the negative feelings that I had and my loneliness in my depression and relationship.
My ex is a fucking Trump supporter now. Fuck him. His opinion is invalid and literally I see all the time how fucking stupid his opinion was on a lot of things. I’m glad I’m not fucking dating someone anymore who was secretly racist. He fucking hid that shit from me because he “didn’t want to upset me or offend me.” The truth came out when he was drinking because liquor was always like a truth serum for his fucking ass. Flash forward several years and I find that he categorizes Latinxs and black folks as the “good” or “bad” kind.
Fucking moron with his shit family. No more uncomfortable conversations with his fucking Trumper parents. I keep thinking about what kind of bullshit that my ex and his family are probably saying during these protests and it makes my blood boil.
Finding excuses to do something that isn’t through a screen - and beautiful stationery definitely helps.
i’m queuing this from all the way in march, and i stg if blackpink haven’t had a comeback by the time it posts 😡
my packages finally came in ✨
hello, friends! this is just a mini haul of things i got online. i finally decided to start journaling, so i bought two 6-ring binders (one clear & one leather). for these binders, i bought some dividers and different types of fillers. i also got a looooot of stickers and two washi tapes — they turned out super cute so i kinda regret not buying more. lastly, i got some lomo cards (for gfriend and nct127) because i’m planning to start a kpop journal! srsly, i love buying stationery from shopee. everything’s affordable, but high quality. i’m so so excited to use these! i hope my journals turn out well ♡
A little drawing to relax & enjoy the free time in quarantine ✿
June 5th, 2020.
My boyfriend and I are currently fixing our apartment and it’s coming together so nicely! We bought a yellow sofa in velvet, which is just lovely, and we’ve ordered such nice furniture for the balcony, kitchen and my future creative space. We also bought new blankets, pillows, throws, frames for photos etc. I’m so excited to put our little home together! ♥️
What do you paint when you don’t know what to paint?
This is how I see “Dream”✨🌷
Trains are nostalgic asf🎞☁️
June journal spread✨🐋
Day 2: If I could talk to my teenage self, the one thing I would say is…
Dear 15-year-old Ivy, be kind to yourself. Please love yourself. I know it sounds easy and you might not understand but please love yourself and be patient with yourself. Things don’t happen overnight. As mother RuPaul herself says “If you can’t love yourself how in the hell can you love somebody else.” I know it’s hard not to be over critical with yourself, but trust me those little details you care about so much no one notices. People are rooting for you, people have faith in you, don’t let your own self-destruction ruin the good things coming your way. I know what the biggest question on your mind is right now, and yes you will find someone who loves you. But trust me it hurts, it still hurts me to this day. Please also have patience with others, not everyone has their mind running at 100 mph, not everyone is so forced on the little details and if you keep up with that mentality of everything has to be perfect you will be left with little to no happiness. You don’t need to have control over everything. Your life is just starting even though you think you need to have your life planned out until your 50 you don’t. Trust me the things you have planned out right now aren’t going to happen. Be open to change and don’t fight it. I would have had such a great time in high school if I just would have loved myself and just had some patience. But trust me when I say this you are amazing, beautiful, smart, creative, and just a wholesome person. You are very loved by so many. Please don’t ever feel alone.
With all the love, Future Ivy <3