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mikeysbabygirl · 2 years

Note

I got an idea for a fic, no pressure babe, everything you write is amazing anyway 😩💕. Ok so i was thinking about depressed! reader and sanzu or baji (whoever fits the concept better) . So the idea is: you can't break what's already broken. So basically the reader is totally unimpressed and disgusted with their advances because she lost color in her life and hates herself. You can make it a happy ending or angst ( please make the boys suffer if you pick this one 👀) .

That's it, thank you ILYSM 💕

To fan his flame

Warning : 18+ Minors DNI. Mention of depression, angst, violence, explicit smut, bike race ( DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME ) ,slight mention of self harm, please stay safe, ask for help if you need it.

Hello baby ! Thanks for all your feedbacks you're so sweet ILY 🖤 so that's my first time writing for Baji, I hope I didn't screwed his character...

Through a piercing glare, his brown eyes scanned both of you, sitting on the chairs in front of him. You gulped down discreetly, eyeing the man next to you who wore a careless expression.

-" What do you have to say for yourself ?"

-" It's Baji's fault. "

-" Funny, I already heard that one " that one scoffed as you showered him in your darkest glare. " I was only tryna get you to talk to me" .

-" And you thought the best option was to set her neighbor's yard on fire ?"

-" Well now she talks to me " Baji retorted in his usual cocky tone, the man in the uniform shot him an exasperated glance before turning toward you.

-" And you're gonna tell me racing at 130 was his fault too ?"

-" Yes !" You exclaimed, the policeman crossed his arms and leaned against his chair, an exhausted look on his face. " Look, officer, it's a long story-".

-" we have plenty of time, I'm sure no one's gonna bail you out at 2 a.m. Go 'head. "

The first step deciphering that pandemonium would be traveling some months ago. Baji's dream has always been to open his own petshop, and he succeeded. What first started as a small business with his two best friends turned into the most famous pet shop in Tokyo.

If you ask people what you may find in a petshop, they would say pets, buddies, love. As for you, life has never been kind to you. Therefore even in such a haven, it brought you trouble, wrapped in two sharp canines and wavy jet-black hair.

One less minute in that petshop, and all the next month's rollercoaster could have been avoided. If only you had vaccinated those cats faster, but no, with that pretty gratuitous karma you have been carrying since forever, you had to meet him right before his blond friend could pay you.

-" Go 'head, Chifuyu, 'm gonna take care of it".

You remembered you were already tense, something about his smirk, his damn sharp teeth didn't put you at ease. As he walked around the counter to take the money out of the till, you took off your vet white coat and shoved that one carefully in your bag, yet he took a wide-eyed glance out of you when you felt his fingertips grazing against the straps of your top.

-" The actual fuck ?"

There, eyeing your top you figured out he slipped the bills between your straps and your skin, as if one would do with a stripper, on his face there was a cocky smirk. Taking those ones from where he placed them, you noticed along with the bills was a small paper with a phone number on it.

-" Seriously ? " You deadpanned, Baji leaned against the counter on his elbows, flashing his teeth. His eyelashes fluttering slightly when his gaze drifted toward your chest before quickly going back to your face.

-" Just my way to say you're cute enough to fuck with me someday" along with a playful wink, he dragged you out of your numb state.

-" Fine. "

You wore an impassive expression as you took out your lighter from your jean pocket, and that might be where it all started.

It could have been the way you set those bills and paper on fire, or how the flames shone through your ice-cold gaze, one glimpse was enough to get his thrill-seeking soul warming like water, mesmerized by the dancing flames in your eyes.

-" This is my way to tell you I'm not interested. "

And you walked away, unimpressed, after dropping the burning bills on the counter in front of him. All it took was a wildflower through a blaze to get him thinking about you that night.

Cold as you were, water would be to extinguish fire, but you were only there to fan his flame. Throughout all your visits at the petshop, you somehow got along with two of them, namely Chifuyu and Kazutora. They were nice, gentle, let you do your job with the pets and didn't pushed you to talk when you didn't felt like it, which was kind of an all the time thing. It was not like you meant to be aloof or anything, people often don't understand how hard it is to let people in again after seeing how a single one could shatter you like a house of cards.

However, for an oddball as Baji Keisuke, it goes in one ear and out the other. At first it wore the disguise of a challenge, his friends would not stop laughing everytime you pushed him away or just deadpanned at one of his advances, needless to say it was refreshing for them. Women would always fall under the spell of the wildness emanating from him, Chifuyu and Kazutora even came to wonder whether you were into men or not, as cliché as it seemed no one ever refused Baji Keisuke, and something happened.

For the raw man, primal, the race was always about winning. An adrenalin-addict, he has been since forever, fights, races, and you had seemed beyond his reaches which resulted in him thinking mord often about you, then having frantic heartbeats whenever you would visit to do your job, and God did he liked the rush.

-"Ew, did you just... Touched my hand ?"

-" it's a hand, not an ass, chill. "

He would say smirking, after accidentally brushing his hand against yours as you would be examining one of the cats.

-" Ya know, I heard having sex can improve the mood, 'cause of all the hormones and shit."

-" Hm, so you're telling me you can actually read, like something which's not pictures ? Of naked women on red shiny bikes ?"

-" Wait what the hell do you mean I can't read ?"

Throughout the time, you had learned he was none but a dynamite stick. Again, your cold demeanor, against all odds only fueled his flame.

Those few seconds where your disinterest would take the best of him were a sort of consolation for all the times he did bothered you, it was particularly funny to watch him lose it.

-" Take it as you want" You had shrugged, in no time a wave of manly cologne crashed on you, clenched jaw, white knuckles around your collar that he held, in a bloodcurdling indifference you had watched the flames dancing in his eyes.

-" You think you can just run that pretty mouth of yours whenever you want? "

He dived deep in your Arctic-like cold ocean as you leaned closer, only inches away from his face. He could feel your breathe hitting his lips, see no end for the gaping hole in your eyes, hear it echoing.

-" As long as it would take you to understand, you do not phase me, Baji Keisuke. "

A tune up would be in order, this was not about the challenge, not anymore. Rather for the mix of ire and thrill pumping through his blood everytime you were around, about seconds, those of expectation where he would hope to get something out of you, other than an empty glance.

Something about the sunshine must have been different that day, the one where you saw him in a whole new light. Talking about the rays, those ones seeped through the room's window straight to kiss his silk-like hair, one or two seconds where you'd allowed yourself to watch him better as he approached you and the cat you struggled to keep from moving.

-" You look pathetic, lemme help ya ". His fingertips brushed against yours as he took the cat in his hands, keeping him still as you took off the syringe.

-" I could've just done it myself " you avoided his gaze, getting closer to the both, hearing a " tch " falling from his mouth. You ran a hand through your hair before starting, Keisuke watched your hair locks falling around your focused face, kissed by the sun, your light-bathed eye color glancing at him from time to time to ensure his grip around the pet, at one point he could have sworn that he had seen them soften as the cat winced in pain.

-" there you go, buddy ".

He put the pet back, and couldn't help a scoff eyeing the bleeding scratch the cat left previously on your hand before he came to help you.

-" It doesn't always has to be just you and yourself, ya know. "

He saw you stopping in your track, your eyes trailing down with a certain urgence in them, your heart beat faster screaming to pull your sleeve down, not fast enough for his sharp glance to catch the horizontal lines scars on the inner skin of your wrist.

Definitely not a cat one, he had deduced with a certain sorrow taste in his mouth. Damn the adrenalin, damn your push and pull game, what his body ached to do at the realization was to hold you close enough to put all of your pieces back together.

Regretfully, those hands have been sculpted to harm, not to hold. Those eyes to scare not to comfort. He knew he could've crashed you down, too rough, too loud, he was not the best for that.

On another hand, all your anxiety got removed as a burden from your shoulders when he started walking out of the room, you were glad he spared you the usual " do you wanna talk about it?" Along with the pity laced in the voice tone.

However...

-" I'm not saying this shit 'cause I wanna get inside your pants" your eyes drifted toward him, he had his back to you, hair slightly flying to the light wind, peering at you from the corner of a bronze eye.

-" But you're a damn badass. "

His words seemed to fly around, until wrapping around your tight throat. A stabbing pain in the heart and a warmth spreading in your chest, he wrapped you in a closed-eyes smile for the few seconds where he turned his head toward you.

- " And if you tell anyone I said this I'll snap your neck, but fuck I'm proud of ya".

A game changer, it was all that it took, for a night under the covers, staring at the ceiling where you would be questioning everything your mind had been whispering about him the last months. Through the darkest corners of your head it shone for days, you loathed yourself for not being able to take it out of your head, yet...

He didn't said he was sorry for you, didn't took pity on you, and whatever was it that he thought about you, he didn't let you perceive a single glance of it, thankfully. All along, Baji Keisuke wore the label of an empty hunk, a rowdy insufferable one, and suddenly two words were hurricane-strong to blow that coat in the air, and there he was, soul-naked for your eyes only willingly revealing his clumsy yet somehow, kind of, maybe soft spot.

To tell whether you'd have preferred him to keep the act or not was a harder fight, you were not even able to figure out which part of him was the act, the one you despised, or the one... The other, in short.

Often there is times where life, fate would throw you somewhere, or stir a knife in an old wound. You'd call it cruel, and curse whoever wrote the plan because you'd have your eyes so glued on the pain of the knife that you wouldn't even notice it was only a way of removing it, start the healing process.

The butterfly effect, small things building up to greater ones, it could have been a shape of fate, for that night at least.

The first time you met her, was at the emotions anonymous,a sort of support group providing locals and help to improve individual's mental health. It started with sharing some cigarettes, a word or two after the session since she was just as you, not very talkative. Then it built up to having a drink at the coffee next to the local, both of you ended up revealing your names and exchanging your numbers, though she was way older than you . Often as it gets in such situations, one thing led to another, and there you were today at Ryoko's birthday party.

For once in twenty lifetimes, you had agreed to come into an event full of unknown people dressed in chic dresses and suits holding champagne glasses and talking about adulthood stressing stuffs. You did not actually interacted with anyone besides Ryoko, and decided to leave the party earlier than expected, it was getting boring to lean against the wall. You just needed to quickly powder your nose, freshen in the bathroom before leaving.

And there you were in Ryoko's bathroom, wrapped in a pretty sundress, standing mouth agape in front of no other than Baji Keisuke who as reckless as he was spilled his beer on you.

And he had the nerves to laugh.

-" Dude s-sorry... " He uttered between two uncontrolled laughters, your temporal vein almost popping up seemed to be the funniest thing he had seen in decades. " I didn't saw you but damn, you're wearing a dress, like an actual one ".

And he went into another laughter, you could have sworn that what had run through your veins was nothing but a thunderbolt, all your anti-violence resolutions were only trails left behind your fist that flew to his jaw.

The only thing you knew the next seconds you were thinking : damn if these walls could talk...

Mayhem, a new gate to hell have been opened that day. One floor higher than the soft music downstairs and the mundane conversations, a gateway to the netherworld. When in that parallel universe women and men were slow dancing, a hand that should be around your waist have been replaced by his grabbing your dress neckline, and yours was holding his collar instead of resting at the back of his neck.

His mother raised him better than to hit a woman, he would never. Yet his sharp glare on yours spoke of a thousand ways to tame you, while yours coldly kept the eye contact. God did the punch against his sharp jaw ached through your fist, but the small bleeding split on his lip was the most effective analgesic.

-" swear to fucking God, the things I'm holding back right now... "

Where he usually was loud, his newly low tone was danger dripping. Never ever had a gaze creeped inside every cell of you the way his did, faces ridiculously close, his fingertips unnecessarily brushing against your skin as he held your neckline.

-" Why ? 'cause I'm a woman and can't deal with a blow ?"

Your heart skipped a beat, he shifted his eyes away from you, flashed a toothy grin and echoed a low chuckle, only to come back even closer to your face.

-" The least of your worries would be a punch right now. "

Seeing his sly smile, you couldn't help but shake your head and curl a tiny one, which he hadn't missed and gulped down discreetly as for the first time your eyes shone with something else than anger. Some missed heartbeats later and his gaze drifted toward the small hollow between your parted lips, you did the same, and although every braincell of yours screamed how wrong it was, damn it his blood still was staining your knuckles, calloused fingers of his wrinkling your neckline pinning you to the wall, yet your heard ached for succumbing to that pull.

-" it's the chase, hm ?"

Still knee deep in that sort of trance-like state your smile and the quick flicker in your eyes had put him in, he hummed silently.

-" The thrill of the chase. " You repeated, this time his full attention on your words. " I've been wondering why were you so hell bent on having me, you're in constant need for a challenge and I'm constantly saying no."

-" Wow-wait " tension began climbing in the air, you pushed him away from you making him frown.

-" Whether it's a bet you lost or about your male pride, the thrill won't last long after I give in. Spare yourself the extra effort. "

-" So you're giving in ?"

At one point you could've sworn you felt a tingling sensation inside that you ignored, and gasped through a breathed outraged laugh.

-" So it was a bet ?"

-" Hell no !" He tried getting closer to you, however was stopped by a glare and a raised hand between you two.

-" Then it's the thrill of the chase ?"

Keisuke's frustration appeared as a hand he ran through his hair, pulling at the roots. Last time he had been at a loss of words was a question mark honestly, yet there he was weighing the pros and cons of each sentence. What could he possibly say? When there has been a broken record in his head for days singing that sex was no more his top one intention ?

With each second passing by he saw you building back those impenetrable walls around you, slipping between his fingers again and cursed mentally because of the knot tightening in his chest. Needless to say never had his body experienced such a rollercoaster, impressive that is.

Alarm bells rang inside his mess of a head when you started walking out of the bathroom, that same voice asking him to not let you go, but again, why would he do that ? He'd never follow anyone, he was a free spirit and depended of nobody.

A free spirit, Baji Keisuke was, and it has obviously nothing to do with him chasing you through his mother's neighborhood as you walked toward your car, a minute later.

-" would you seriously cut that shit out ?"

You could easily hear his steps behind you getting closer, never turned to face him.

-" you didn't even told me how you know my moth-"

-" Mind you own damn business " one of the first time he had witnessed your tone raising slightly which took him aback, gave you enough time to climb in the car and close the door as soon as he got closer.

-" You don't get to close the fucking door on me, open. Now. " Through gritted teeth, he had demanded, placing himself in front of your car hood. You scoffed, eyeing the bulging vein in his front.

-" Get out of the way, you'll only get one warning. "

You cursed as his hand came down flat on the hood, oh that if he damaged your car in any way...

-" I'm not repeating. Get your fucking ass out-"

Good thing he had such good reflexes, otherwise he probably would be lying down half dead in the middle of the night. It came like a thunderclap, the engine roaring your rage, the few inches between his body and the hood, him jumping to the side, and you going down that road.

-" Don't say I didn't warn you. "

Driving home with the indignation heavy on your chest, you didn't even had time to figure out why in hell were you feeling so disappointed before an engine started roaring behind you.

-" Shit, what the hell ?"

Through the rear mirror, the only thing you could distinguish through the dark night was smooth hair flying to the demon's rhythm.

-" wear a helmet damn it " you cursed, his bike being a lighter weight than your car, he started chasing you closer. The pounding sensation in your heart was something you hadn't felt in years, which had you unconsciously stepping on the gas, enjoying to see his bike getting left behind.

Then it hit him hard, harder than every blow he had ever taken from Mikey, the shallow breathing and the shaking hands around his bike. How funny was it, in that moment of pure bliss where the Adrenaline should have him feeling like a God was he thinking about you ? Tasting yet the blood you drew out of his lips, running that race you initiated, you, you, you.

Keisuke rolled the throttle toward him, the number on the dash growing faster, allowing him currently to get a better look at your face, and blessed has he been to get a glimpse of that wide smile of yours, probably meant to tease him through the window yet it only set him on fire.

You both had a need, a need for speed. Smoke followed behind your two vehicles, as if tracing a way to hell.

Driving not a road but an edge of a knife, high on adrenaline and your smiling face, Baji rolled the throttle until he passed you by, and in an impulse of a crazy rush flipped his motorcycle in a way to block your way.

Your hands suddenly tightened around the steering wheel, slamming on the brake at breakneck speed and closing your eyes, waiting for an impact that never came. Which could have came at a second's notice.

-" It's been a hell of a ride !"

At the sound of his voice, your eyes opened wide. It was really only a second away, your car was so close to his bike that you were only inches away from colliding. Your blood boiling in your veins, you got out of the car and slammed the door, heading towards him.

Blame the Adrenaline rush, or his bike's light on your eyes, the night's wind on your hair, or your dress swaying at every step of yours, the truth was you had his heart beating even more than the race.

Halfway, you met, in front of your car's hood, eyes boring into each other's with the only thing between your two bodies, inches and palpable tension.

One that along with the high of the ride got you flying, too addict on that sensation to think about letting go any sooner.

-" let's get something straight. " You had snapped him out of his thoughts, only to crash him with your next words. " One night, all you gonna have with me is one night. "

One for hearing.

Two for realizing.

Three for his eyes widening.

Four for your lips meeting.

Needless to say, Baji Keisuke had that trouble taste, blood, cigarette and mint, he had that cold night ride's feel with wind in your hair when you know you shouldn't be out. His lips moved against yours, while his hands circled your waist and brought you closer. It all began the second he bit your lower lip, so your tongues could brush against each other, the next thing you knew your back was pressed against the car hood, your neck getting painted by red and purple marks.

-" Don't mark m-"

-" Focus on the feeling f'me, yeah? Good girl"

And for a second, everything stopped.

-" Wait ! " Leaning on your elbows, you had stopped him. " Did you just shushed me with a good girl ?"

-" I guess... ?" It was about gasoline and fire the minute he stretched that playful smile, about an explosion when his back suddenly hit the hood as you switched the positions in a minute of inattention, and about the heat of a thousand fires when you crashed your lips now leading the dance.

At some point, minutes and heated kisses later, grateful for the mist on the windows car for it was the only thing preventing any passerby to see your naked body, as he stripped you on the driver's seat. The desire flooding his body at the sight of your most secret parts competed with every one he has ever felt, for when his face buried in the crook of your neck and his hands reached to palm your breasts, he let go of all wheels, switching to the carnal rough instinct.

-" knew you were hot but this, Goddamn babe".

A breathed chuckle passed your lips and echoed in the car, along with a grunt of him as you rubbed your now bare crotch against his pants.

-" Say this once again and I'mma throw up on you ".

Ignoring you, Keisuke crashed you against his chest and took your lips in his. Flouting all the principles, teeth biting way too hard on your lips, hands lifting your hips to meet his bulge at a frenetic pace, because he knew no other than you could take him.

Who other than you could take him raw, untamed and uncaged? The one fist-fighting him behind closed doors, racing faster than his bike in the middle of the night, the one crying his name and coming all over his pants currently at a particular hard thrust of his bulge against her clit.

-" Fuck, that's it. Keep staining my pants, princess, keep cumming for me."

His praises helped you through your high, all along while he kept squeezing your breasts in a strength that would have anyone crying when you were only moaning his name in pure bliss.

Then it came, and it hit even harder than the first time. The minute he slipped inside you, the way your walls hugged him in, and-

-" Shit Kei... Deeper, I know you can go deeper !"

If he was in a movie then that is definitely where the fireworks would have exploded, hitting that damn spot inside you and having you biting his shoulder, you took him raw, took him as he came unwrapped and unleashed, the fingerprints on your hips, the biting marks on your neck, his wet and messy kisses on your lips, and even asked- no, demanded more. It hit hard because for once in a lifetime he had felt not only wanted but truly accepted.

-" look at you... Takin' my cock so fucking good- damn, love. You're gonna be the end o'mme !"

-" F-faster... Kei, feels so fucking good... 'm close !"

Pleas were swallowed in yet another mind-blowing kiss, chaos and bliss made one that night, in a hazy heated car, late night in the middle of a highway. Two bodies made one, then embodied mayhem and hell.

Through your hit and run to cloud nine, you exquisitely clenched around him while coming undone on him for the second time, arching your back and throwing your head, only for heaven to open its doors for him the next second.

With a gorgeous woman's naked body in front of him, what he couldn't take his eyes off was your face. How it contorted from pleasure, how your eyes shone bright even in the darkness of the night, the moan passed the swollen red lips were all he needed to fly.

Too deep engulfed in your tightening walls, he had groaned your name in loud moan before letting his head fall on the crook of your neck, high-riding like he had never done before.

-" Drain me, pretty girl. That's it, don't waste a single drop. "

He had panted against your skin, you laughed through your orgasm, collapsing against his chest, hearing how fast his heart was beating.

This is where the story ends, no happy ever after a single night, no second chances for the lost souls.

Or maybe...

-" I don't wanna hear about it. And you better find yourself a new vet, I'm not stepping inside that shop again. " Making your way out of the police station, when birds just started singing for the first sun rays, you had shouted without turning to peer at him.

He followed you on your way back to the main road since your car was home, hands shoved in his pockets totally ignoring Chifuyu behind both of you, standing still next to the police station's door.

-" That's what I get for bailing them out... "

Yet none of you actually paid attention to him, for when you reached a particular point, your back has been pressed against a tree.

-" what the fuck do you want again ?"

Only then have you noticed the change in his expression, the usual cocky spark in those bronze eyes was swallowed by a lost one, as if the man who spoke, openly, about your lovemaking on a highway to a policeman was light-years away now.

Those words he has been thinking about all the night in his cell danced across his clavicle, wrapped around his throat, that was the type of Adrenaline he wasn't a junkie of, the type of heartbeat he didn't liked, yet the one he knew he would get through, only for you.

-" That's not about the chase. "

His eyes watched you frown, tilting your head to the side, and God did he felt things when in so long he hadn't seen some interest in your eyes.

-" I might... You, might have been a challenge first. "

A scoff passed the barrier of your lips, disappointment stirring your guts to look away, but a rough hand grabbed your jaw and pulled your gaze back into his frowning one.

-" At first. But then, you... Shit" he ran a hand through his hair, frustrated, then took a step back thus releasing your face. You could see straight through the struggle he was facing and for a second thought he would give up, until he started talking again.

-" But you were just, there, everytime even when you weren't. No bitch ever had my heart beating this way, no bitch ever was worth risking to crash my bike, and you punched me-"

-" I don't see where you're tryna get at " you inquired, though wishful thinking was whispering dangerous somethings in your mind, life has slapped you way too much to got you hoping for anything.

Then something happened in the darkest corners of your fucked up mind, something about how the sun rays suddenly lightened him in the middle of nowhere, and how for the first time you'd faced a child and not a man, a sight way too holy and innocent for Baji Keisuke.

-" Look, it's probably gonna sound wrong, and I know you said I can only have one night with ya. "

A step closer, walls collapsing, hearts beating.

-" But I'm not as blind as to miss the best thing I could've had, when it's staring right back at me. And those fucking three words-"

-" Kei-"

-" Shut the fuck up".

Another step, his hand cupping your face.

Eyes on eyes, fire on ice, and his chest squeezing too much.

-" I'm not one to say those three fucking words, and neither are you. " Only a second where he took in the small smile tugging at the corner of your lips, before he resumed.

-" But I swear on my fucking life I'll make the pain better".

Guts stirring, hearts beating, hearts breaking.

-" And I'm not one to fear a storm, you'll have me on your back every time life's ready to pull another shit on you, 'cause we're like, ya know, crime partners. "

- " that sounds awful " you chuckled, a " tch" left his mouth as an answer, smiling, however.

-" I talked a lot, whatcha thinking ?"

To take the chance or not? To hop in a hell of a drive or not ?

And the last guards, remnants of a wall stumbled down, sunshine shining behind the clouds, like his teeth poking out of his toothy grin.

Out of his pocket, his hand took out-

-" Handcuffs?"

His smile grew wider, showing the handcuffs better between your two faces.

-" I'm not gonna ask how you met my mother, and you're not gonna ask how I managed to steel these handcuffs. "

Rare was the sight and the sound of a true laughter from you, one he knew he would like hearing more often despite how overwhelmed it got him feeling.

-" So whatcha say ? Me, this handcuffs, and your pretty pussy on my bed ?"

Network : @tokyo-ballroom @downtown-roponggi

So ! Writing this was kinda hard, like I said this the first time I wrote for Baji, and I hope I didn't kinda screwed him nor the depressed! Reader

Tell me what you think 'bout it honestly hon', and if you don't like it I'll try again, anything for you 😩

Requests : are still open, yet you gotta understand you'd have to wait a little time before getting it <3

#tokyo rev x you #tokyo revengers smut #tokyo revengers spoilers #tokyo revengers angst #tokyo rev fluff #toman gang #toman founders #baji x reader #baji keisuke #baji smut #toman baji #baji x y/n #baji x you #tokyo revengers baji #baji scenarios

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kaija-rayne-author · 7 months

Text

Ugh. I feel like absolute crap. Had to shop yesterday even though I was already flaring from the shopping trip with the kids.

I've rebounded my damned headcold or caught another when the other was just going away.

Why can't people mask ffs!

Why do all y'all want to share germs anyway, it's gross. Icky.

And dear gods it takes my immunocompromised ass forever to kick even a headcold. Give us chronically ill people a break and please mask!

The winter of 2020 I didn't even get the flu. And the flu floors me for 6 weeks every year because I'm allergic to one of the ingredients in the vaccines so I can't get it. Two way masking absolutely works.

Why wouldn't people want to avoid getting sick? It makes no logical sense. Even a headcold is miserable.

And yes, I religiously mask. It's on my face before I leave the house and it doesn't come off except in a closed vehicle or when I get home.

But there's only so much one way masking can do when you're surrounded by selfish jerks who can't bother to care about their fellow humans.

And uh, if you're one of those people who wish they could get sick just so you have an excuse to rest, you're likely already chronically ill and overextending yourself. It's a trauma reaction.

#kai's rambles #about kai #chronically ill #chronic illness #mecfs #long covid

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tohisprettyc00l · 3 months

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Hii could I get a toh match up please:) romantic and Platonic if that’s ok

~I’m 16

~ I use they/them pronouns and am pansexual.

~I’m a Capricorn ♑️

~I love to read though I will read six books in a month or a book in six months.

~I can’t play it but I have a love for music

~I love to bake cooking as well but mainly baking :p

~I’m very introverted and hate talking to new people I’ll just nod or make a sound for the first 3 weeks or so but I’m also just naturally quiet

~I love thé outdoors mainly wooden places that give off an old fantasy vibe

~I get stressed over everything and I tend to over things

~ I have bad insomniac due to my work schedule so I do tend to be awake doing shit at any given time of that day or night

I Hope thats enough info for This :) Hope you have a good day and remember to look after your self :))

I (romantically) match you with: Amity Blight!

-She loves reading as well [mainly she'll read one series (Azura *cough* *cough*)but that still counts]

-Again she canonically likes baking. I think she'd like to share demon realm recipes and try out human realm recipes.

-Very much an introvert. Usually answers yeah to people she just became friends with (unless she had a rivalry or something with before)

- She lives in a fantasy world lol. But she also likes the vibe of old places.

-Definition of an overachiever. We can "thank" Odaila, and Alador to a lesser extent for that.

-Again relating back to her bad work habits because of her parents she often pulled all-nighters. Even though she's escaped that she's kept the bad habit for when she's making things.

I (Platonicly) match you with: Lilith Clawthorne!

-Damn you got Amity and Amity's REAL mom.

-Obv loves books.

-She loves music, both for the sound and for the history, it can carry.

-While she talks to people a lot whether she befriends them or they are enemies, you have to know her for her to talk first.

-Also likes old buildings but again for the history.

-She is the forgotten child who overdoes things because of that.

-She canonically has a bad sleep schedule right? I feel like I remember that being mentioned and/or shown.

I hope you like it! I'm a bit rusty and have the flu (get vaccinated kids the one year I didn't I got the fucking flu) so I hope it's ok!

#toh x reader #the owl house x reader #amity blight x reader #amity x reader #lilith clawthorne + reader #lilith + reader #lilith and reader #lilith clawthorne x reader #lilith x reader

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catchyhuh · 5 months

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It's flu season. How would they live through the sickness + would they take care of each other? Bonus: how did they survive the pancemic / quarantine situations?

you know the funny thing is the only time i’ve ever had the flu (which was miserable and lasted a full week WITH the vaccine already in my system so remember to ALWAYS KEEP UP WITH YOUR SHOTS) i had been into lupin for about a yearish, and i watched fuma AND napoleon’s dictionary in one night to pass the time and only at that moment did i truly understand the. variety of animation quality present in the lupin the third franchise. i can still taste that medicine in my mouth whenever i see either of them. but anyway

lupin:

lupin has two sick modes: not feeling too peachy but will act like he’s dying to exploit special treatment and being pampered, and actually very, very sick, but will deny he’s that sick because he feels weird having people truly, honestly, sincerely worried for him.

would he take care of others? well. yes. not in a very tender way, but he doesn’t want them DYING at least. like, if jigen is bundled up on the couch, red nosed, blanket over his head, and pathetically asks for the remote, lupin will get up and give it to him, but he’s not holding his hair back when he’s vomming lol. he WILL offer a hairtie though. you see? it’s about that level of care. you’ll be far from miserable, but in all honesty, he COULD do more

would you believe people standing multiple feet away from you in a museum makes it twice as easy to plant secret tracking devices and tiny bombs and shit? would you believe? would you believe masks made facial recognition tech twice as easy to crack since most people turned it off anyway? WOULD YOU BELIEVE?

jigen:

jigen feels this weird defensive embarrassment about being sick. people like jigen don’t GET sick. or so they all tell themselves. so when he’s actually like, SICK sick, miserable and nauseous and coughing, it bothers him MENTALLY more than it does PHYSICALLY

as a result he doesn’t want people taking care of him. it’s going to happen anyway, usually from lupin, so he doesn’t waste energy fighting, but he’ll only barely acknowledge the fact he’s the picture of death right now

his usual personality is in full play when he’s taking care of someone ELSE though. you’re only getting the help if you beg or if he can immediately tell you’re going through it, but if you DO get his help, he’s going to talk and talk and talk about how you KNOW better than to hang around after someone tells you to your face they’ve been sick. you’re lucky he gives enough of a damn to get you the big stack of tissues with the special lotion in them so you don’t rub your stupid nose raw. you’re welcome btw,

fujiko:

oh the emotional turmoil of being “too perfect to get sick” but also LOVING getting whatever you want under the guise of “please? i’m sick :(“ it's so hard to be her. so difficult to have her lavish life

fujiko is not. the most doting person. you wanna talk about someone who will just stand in the next room over while you’re hunched over a toilet bowl all pitiful and green in the face. it’s not that she doesn’t care! she just. would rather never ever ever see that shit lol

fujiko’s usual targets are selfish, hateful, yet unbearably idiotic and easy to manipulate. so… she kinda loved when covid was at its full peak, because she got an IMMEDIATE visual shorthand for who was deserving of her sugar baby schemes. ESPECIALLY if they constantly made a big deal about how they refused to mask up. so… yeah, made her life incredibly easy!

goemon:

actually gets the sick the most out of them because he forces his body to withstand extremes that NOBODY’S BODY SHOULD REALLY BE WITHSTANDING. gets the flu almost every year despite getting shots and the like, but he survives.

all of them WOULD take care of him, but he rejects the help. it’s not fully a pride thing; he’s heard many times that you heal faster by working your body as normal, so it can readjust quicker. but… he doesn’t really question why they’ve already got some warm soup lightly simmering on the stove so it doesn’t get cold before he pours himself a bowl, or why they just HAPPENED to have the nausea medicine right on the coffee table…

the same “get better faster by getting off your ass” technique is in full swing when he’s watching OVER somebody sick though, so… very much a tough love approach. but if you act even a smidgeon MORE miserable during the process you might get him to back down a tiny bit

zenigata:

(sticking the DO NOT EMULATE sticker on his forehead again) zenigata could stand sopping wet in negative degree weather with the patient 0 covid guy standing right in front of him, breathing right into his nose, and there’s ONLY a 50% chance he’ll actually get sick. and even if he does get sick, IT WON’T STOP HIM IN THE SLIGHTEST.

zenigata is weird because if he’s taking care of one of the gang, first he gets this HAHA IDIOT YOU SHOULD’VE KNOWN YOU’D GET SICK but when they actually start paling and getting weak he’s like “oh my god you lost a shit ton of electrolytes. we need some gatorade” so once you get past that initial gloating stage he’s not bad. just. very overwhelming, as he usually is

gets touchy about being taken care of depending on who the caretaker in question is. for 85% of people, he’s brushing off the help, insisting he’ll be back on his feet, and really, you shouldn’t hang around him either or you might catch it too. but if it’s somebody who’s already seen him drunkenly sobbing over the smallest act of kindness or quite literally jumping out of windows in a lupin-filled blind rage then. yeah, he’s a little more accepting of the help.

#SORRY I'M GETTIN THROUGH THESE ASKS KINDA SLOW #I DON'T WANNA HALFASS ANY OF THESE SO. ITS A GRADUAL PROCESS #lupin iii #lupin the third #lupin #jigen #fujiko #goemon #zenigata #asks

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moregraceful · 10 months

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L after fucking L at the clinic today for FOUR STRAIGHT hours

First, [Specialist] was out here like, bro i think you just have [fully recoverable virus for humans commonly associated with dogs, NOT lycanthropy sadly], I'm like THE DISEASE THAT DOGS GET?? He was like yeah but the human kind dw. But I'm pretty sure that's what's going on. I was like bro come on. And then he sent me to the lab for bloodwork just to make sure I have fully recoverable dog virus where they took even more of my blood...please...ladies....how will the sexy vampires feast on me tonight if I have no blood...

Then went to my gp and took seventeen more losses. Told her some symptoms that were bothering me for a while, she was like lmao bro you haven't dealt with this REOCCURRING ON A WEEKLY BASIS SYMPTOM for HOW long!!? I was like lady listen. You referred me to [a different specialist] in 2021 and he did blood work and was just like take antihistamines and i got super mad and never saw him again. She was like ok but the antihistamines did not work?? And you just lived like that?? FOR TWO YEARS?? I was like i have a tragic backstory involving the medical field that causes me to shy away from seeking medical help!!! She was like ok but I'm writing you another referral You Do Not Have To Live Like This.

Then [Department I was referred to] called me while I was sitting in the lobby waiting in fifteen minute vaccine jail (ya boy will be fully hepatitis b vaccinated soon...fellas watch out...) and they were like sooo you're actually an established patient of this man due to seeing him in 2021...so you have to see him. I was like, must I. Simply must I. And the nice administrator on the phone was like, well most of our department is going on vacation this summer, butttttt. yeah no you do lol. I was like I GUESS!! But at least this appt is in person unlike the last one, which was telehealth - I am way better at advocating for myself in person. so if he says hmm, i think you should take even more antihistamines i can fight him in real life.

And then i had to get an x-ray bc apparently [ENTIRELY UNRELATED SYMPTOM TO EVERYTHING ELSE THAT I THOUGHT WAS JUST A SYMPTOM OF AGING] is not something doctors are generally thrilled to hear abt you having for years. And i met a very nice x-ray technician who was a little on edge bc there was a kid in the next x-ray room having a screaming meltdown you could hear from the waiting room. I was like bro i get it. I also need to go scream in front of my mom

And then after all that was done, i texted my mom tell her that i probably have a dog virus that isn't even lycanthropy and she was buddy you had dog virus in preschool lmao you'll live. Pain.

I also apparently canceled therapy in a fugue state sometime in the past two weeks so i only have one more healthcare appointment this week 😩 but this last one i am not dreading TOO much bc a) this was not a referral, i choose her specifically based on the stress i have around [fourth probably unrelated problem to everything else, not lycanthropy] and b) i had a fifteen minute consult with her last week where she was like hmm. Wow. I need to see you weekly, actually. And sent me intake forms immediately. So while this one will be an expensive weekly pain in the ass, at least i will not be waiting until August like my other damn specialist.

Anyway the reason i wrote all that out is a) you all were so kind and sympathetic while i have been going tf thru it for the past three weeks and I felt you deserved an update that i am NOT dying imminently, 2) i learned a valuable lesson today which is that if you put off dealing with/refuse to deal with several physical health problems separately for several years, eventually they snowball to a point where you just feel bad in your body all the time and then it's even more of a pain in the ass to deal with them all at once and you run the risk of being at the clinic for four hours straight slowly losing the will to live. Don't be me, don't do that. Address what is making you feel bad in your body and make sure your problems are heard. Like i am saying this as someone with medical trauma. It is YOUR body and YOUR life, you do not have to spend every day feeling bad for (likely) treatable reasons.

And I'm not even a werewolf 😭😭😭

#medical cw #fresno oilers.txt

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awetistic-things · 1 year

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Have you ever wished you weren’t diagnosed as autistic? I do. My parents thought something was wrong with me and took me to an iq test at the age of two. I ended up getting some ridiculous score that was like 167 or something stupid but the proctor noticed that I had unique behaviors.

Mind you, the vaccines caused autism baloney came out around the time I was tested. So I got an autism diagnosis as a result.

The next two decades were full of being seen as an embarrassment and a disappointment. If I got less than perfection on my grades in elementary school I knew I would have to prove why I didn’t get anything absolutely perfect. I watched special ed teachers slam other kid’s heads into the table until they bled and they couldn’t say a damn thing against it because they were nonverbal. My needs didn’t matter because no one knew what my needs were. I had such bad anxiety I constantly vomited at school. I remember the layouts of all the school clinics more than any teacher’s class. I was labelled a hypochondriac and a liar. I was thrashed in the sixth grade and put into homeschool, where my parents made me teach myself as they were busy with work. Both of them. I was isolated and not allowed to leave the house for a year and a half, when I skipped eighth grade due to acing two grades of state exams. I have a deep abhorrence for myself and I’m starting to learn that autism may be more than just a symptom but my whole outlook on life. Could you teach me how to smile like you do?

hi :)

first of all, i just wanna say that i am so sorry that you went through and witnessed all that you did, nobody should have to go through that, especially for something they can’t control

and you’re right when you say that autism isn’t a symptom, because it’s more like a collection of traits, behaviors, and perspectives that make you the person you are

autism affects you to the point that establishing a line between your autism and you, isn’t very plausible, and it’s easier to just consider yourself as autistically you

but please know that the way other people treat you isn’t a reflection of who you are, but rather the person they are (in this case, a very awful one)

also:

you aren’t an embarrassment or a disappointment because you’re autistic

you aren’t a liar or a hypochondriac for voicing your needs

what you are however is someone who’s trying their damn hardest and isn’t being appreciated nowhere near enough, even though you should be appreciated no matter your level of effort or results

now i can’t tell you a perfect guide on how to be happy, but i can tell you that you deserve all the happiness and love in the world, and i hope that from now rather than trying to be perfect, you just try to be happy, and know that your smile should always come before anything that makes you frown

#this is your life and you deserve to fill it with smiles and laughter #you can try to be perfect as much as other people want you to be #but you’ll never be able to because you already are #if they can’t see that then i feel sorry that they are missing out on someone like you #autism #autistic #actually autistic #asd #autism spectrum disorder #on the spectrum #autistic problems #autism problems #ableism #autism acceptance

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tlgpandoramia · 10 months

Text

Chapter One : The Mortifalia

Notes : Hiii, after some inner struggle I decided to share some of my book in Tumblr. I'm just yearning for some feedback XD so I would appreaciate any, but please do be kind, that's my first draft and English is not my native language. Please, don't repost anywhere without my permission. Enjoy!

Word Counting : 4020k

Rate: 16+

`'Read my words well, as I write this under some influence, I feel that my head is about to pop, no idea if all those vaccines shots put a chip, or another virus inside of me, or maybe is just that fucking MORT-09 shit scratching my brain. The doctor said I just got to avoid everything and avoid to drink too much water and take sunbath, easy for that fucker to say, I feel like my body is completely dried, even my lips are all numb and rough for lack of water, the fever is not helping either. Anyway, screw that medical garbage, all the hospitals are full like a Best Buy in a sale day, everyone is coughing blood, and some are even bleeding from the eyes, mouth, nose, ears and pretty much everywhere, is so disgusting to see that, so I prefer to stay at home, at least here I have internet, my computer and nobody looking like a weird horror story. But, the doctors gave me a shot, a vaccine of some sort, saying that it isn't one hundred percent efficient, but it should help the immune system to fight the virus, I say it is bullshit, is not doing anything and my right arm is still sore from that stupid needle.

They said that this new virus came from a plant, or a flower, whatever, is the freaking same thing. But is ugly, last week when I had to go take the shot, I saw a guy bleeding from the head, like someone had cut the top and left it to bleed, the messed up part is that it wasn't normal red blood, but dark like a can of black tint, like a midnight lagoon, the news said that this is the last stage before going into coma, then is over, you fall into a sleep and that's it.

After the shot, I started having nightmares, not the usual scary bloody clown chasing you through an abandoned factory, kind of nightmare, but some real things, like it seems it actually happened, I don't know if it was just a weak moment from my delirious mind, this fucking fever and all the stress, but I heard some feral noises, sounding like shrinks coming straight off a hellish forest. Then I woke up, and saw something through the bedroom window leading to the yard, it was a black shadow of some sort, but it had flesh underneath, it was moving in like a foggy way, giggling around and lifting itself like a cloud of gas. I was up and ready, I know this, I even remember when the trigger was pulled and the bullet hit it. I even buried it, but its always coming back, digging itself off that dirt and the grass, I see it everywhere, in the corner of my eyes, inside the pipes, struggling to get inside, pushing the door and floating around, just like that damn black fog, or spores, that I see when the ignites are on, the vacuum cleaner can't deal with that, I used it, then the next day they reappeared, but that giant human shape black fog is always coming back, doesn't matter how deep I dig it.

Yesterday I spent eight hours watching over the window, aware all the time, feeling my eyes burning and the muscles cramping, but somehow I couldn't stop it, like a sleep paralysis. That's was when I started seeing that white glow fog on every surface, just floating and existing, when I left the house they turned into those huge shining orbs on the dark sky, glowing and singing to me, chanting in a soprano voice, beautiful and peaceful, something that I didn't felt in a long time, it was like angels telling me to law down and accept my death, that they would take me to a better place if I only allow it, that feeling of being rotten from the inside vanished, even the nightmares.

I...We, all thought that this virus was just another excuse for the big pharmaceutical companies to make vaccines and earn billions, but this is different, it doesn't feel like a conspiracy theory or something, it feels real.

My blood turned black, yet sometimes I can catch a glimpse of the red color if I look hard enough.

Today is October six of two thousands and seventeen, three days after the hospital visit, the news aren't positive or hopeful, showing footage of hospital being overrun by sick people, bodies being transported in every available vehicle and being toss inside containers, some are saying that that's it, the end of humankind, between that and global warming is a tough situation to get yourselves out of it.

This Mortifalia, isn't new, I heard about it back in two thousand and six, people from all over the world used it for different purposes, some native used it the flower as a medicine, others eat it like a meal, a few beauty industry people discovered and started using in cosmetics, and not to mention how some would use it as a drug, grab the flower, smash it and mix with hot water, then just smell that thing, it would give anyone a huge high, I did that back in university years ago, maybe that's how I got it, since nobody infected came near me in years and I barely leave my house for three years. When it started becoming an issue back in two thousand and thirteen, the government said that if you took the nitrogen pills and all the vaccines, you would be fine, and so we carry on in this pandemic. In those years almost nobody died, only going into coma, millions of people went to deep sleep, some remained to recent days, I know some people had the virus in the past and nothing happened, but now they are numbers in intensive care units. A little to late, but I throw away all that had the ``dormant Mortifalia``in their formulas, the shampoos, deodorant and that cursed healing water for the skin, they always said that it was impossible for those products to infected someone since the virus within was dead, who knows...Maybe that how I got infected or the flower smelling. Is unusual to say, but I feel at peace, feeling like I could just lay down and sleep forever, the angels don't stop to speak with me, but a part of me feels that this is wrong. There is no peace at slavery, at being a puppet, I'm a salve for a thing that is controlling me, commanding me in everything, even my own thoughts, and words. No! My words are my own, shut up now, and stop whispering in my ears, telling me what to do, or is this just what I'm supposed to believe? It's controlling me, I know, just like a puppet of an insane puppet master. The smell of blood is strong coming from the next house. No, it doesn't! Maybe I should watch those angels in the sky for a little longer.'' Words found in a pre outbreak letter

The story circles to the future, two thousand and twenty seven, disclosing around survivors, one in particular being Miyako Uzume, descendant of an ancient Japanese family with roots of witchcraft and a rumor of ``Chosen by a God``, bound by a promise with a deity until end of times. ``One shall see beyond men logical perspective, blessed to not join the army of pawns that shall walk upon Earth`` An old prophecy that turned the family popular back in Japan, as nobody appreciates they.

Enough of mysticism, those word are only coming out because I fear to speak about the reality that we set upon yourselves.

Beyond the metal and atomic bomb resistant walls, lies something that would make death seems like a frail human, extermination, nothing less. The girl don't remember how the world looked outside the metal box, how most of the days were spend hiding behind the apartment and looking out of the window, never coming in contact with people of the same age or friends in general, weeks would go by and only the sight of the family members could be seen, alongside the smell of recent baked cookies and how loud the progenitor used to listen to the news, yet for her the words never made much of a sense, considering that English proved to be different from asian mother tongue. Although melancholic and boring, the past hits with a home sick feeling, coming in strong and persistent.

Most people misses the old world with all of their hearts, the daily activities, go to work, bar and parties, hear those meaningless celebrities news and the idea of just existing. An emotion not share by the child, as it may be that those were never experienced, if the inner thoughts would ever be spoken out loud, strangers would condemn, after all who could be sympathetic towards someone that believes in the idea of a pandemic world being better that the past one, overall humans grew simplistic, surviving and coping with the past takes all their time, left with no time to judge others or the path someone else wishes to walk upon, worrying about surviving another day.

Dreams of traveling, earning degrees, buying houses and last generations vehicles were crushed years ago, if one were blessed by Lady Luck an approval letter for a shelter program or an invite to live inside a Military Zone arrived in the mailbox a few days before the breaking day, half of the issues could've been dealt with it, however feeling safe also worked as an ultimatum. To be able to live inside a secure place, a citizen should proves useful, assigned to be a working member of the new society, either by attending educational institutions, tasked to a specific job or being less fortunate and work as a manufacturing worker, aiding to keep the places sturdy, maybe joining the militia, options are limited, nevertheless one still has the power of choosing, even though this power lies in two paths, accept it or leave it.

Young kids or infant born within those camps believed that the inanimate concrete and steel is a sentient deity, that shields they for the horror of the outside world, of the lands dominated by the infected, kilometers of the Black Fog covering the capitals, corruption eating away every miserable human settlement out there. Cursing someone to go to hell no longer works, now the most lucky ones wishes for others to go beyond the walls and experience how it feels out there, death penalties also ceased to exist, if one commits a crime that calls for severe punishment, then exile seems logical enough.

Hopes for an ordinary life died six years ago, a major pike of infection overwhelmed hospitals across the world, and it couldn't function anymore with millions of humans going into stasis, the point of no returning, after a few more hours the virus had full control over the host. Despite never witnessing an infected or a victim, children that grew up in shelters learned about it, The Manual describes them as ``Former humans, now in absolute control of the Mortifalia``. Diversified by five stages, all shared an importance, yet the first worries the doctors, taking place between four to six hours after a bite, scratch, breathing the spores or by simple coming in contact with infected blood, airborne took most of the victims, as they never noticed it until the last moment, some areas in cities are so deep within Its territory that the air itself is bio hazard, one dies by suffocation before turning into a Courier.

Shelters were built by the Saga Corporation, half of it were put inside major military camps, however the organization took responsibility to generate their own food, water and electricity supplies. Each party has their own objectives, the military one being to avoid infected near the borders, as a high concentration of the infection can cause a Nucleus to be form, spreading the Black Fog through the wind, even infectiing the rain and the soil itself.

Miyako rest as the youngest daughter of the prestigious virologist, Doctor Reira Uzume, a veteran researcher of the Mortifalia and a key factor for creating a vaccine, the child takes the mother word over anything, admiring her beyond compression, a woman capable of running for president, if the government worked like before, the Uzume matriarch wrote half of The Manual Of The Infection, responsible for gathering information about the virus and how to deal with it in hundred of scenarios.

The others countries remains until this day, yet details of what happened and what became of the provisional laws is a privilege meant for a few high rank officers. The USA fragmented itself in regimes called Provisional Governments, a president figure persisted, however with less power and no longer representing a political wing. With a mandate lasting three years, they need to allied themselves with the Military, Scientific or Industrial party, each with its own beliefs on how to deal with the virus and prevent humans to be extinct, and of course, making sure that the walls remains strong.

A prestige biologist, Katherine Williams sits in the White House, feeding the hope of a vaccine to save the world, whoever the truth doesn't aligned itself with this ideal. The group has the duty of maintaining the hospitals, camps and clinics, while creating ways of improving the new educational system, and worshiping the possibility of a vaccine.

Every night Miyako wonders what happened to the apartment, now laying in a prohibit area of DC, almost all were left behind, even Ren, a teddy bear given by her brother in the girl six year old birthday. On the day the world died, a group of men wearing white tuxedos knocked on the family door, demanding the four to pack it up in essential and leave for the shelter located somewhere in the capital heart, a lot of things were considered useless baggage by the agents, not allowing more that two pair of clothes and shoes, going against the orders, the oldest son sneaked away nail polishes for his sister, storing it all away inside the jacket pockets.

Once upon a time, feed the wishful think that the things left behind would feel alone and abandoned, just like she does. Through all the way to the landing spot, many people were roaming the street, some sick and wandering around, enjoying the last minutes before falling into coma, while others were protesting for a solution, gathering around the military camp protecting the white house, begging to be let inside, the scream mattered not, as none of those outside made it

That night marked the first time she left the secured place for a non medical reason, it felt engulf at some point, as the air itself attempted to crush her lungs, however the safe heaven tagged along, once more, as he promised to do each time. The vision of the round metal vault door closing imprinted itself as an intruder memory, the noise, the staff affirming in a loop that nobody should worry about anything, the smell of smoke and the red light shining, as the door closed to never be opened again, for others present there the sight worked as a reminder of hope and safety, yet for her it mold as a frightened event, locked inside a place with people that controlled the child's life since the first day.

Shelter...A fancy word to be buried inside an underground facility, in the false illusion of safety against everything the outside could throw at it, from atomic bombs to the Black Fog, the idea of holding yourself in an infection free zone, with food, water and light sounds perfect, built inside the biggest military camp in the country, as a warning to the government on who runs the show, although fools believes that the construction happened to create a harmonic relationship with the politicians.

In the middle of the cold and empty metal hallways, a Observatarium takes place, covering several meters of the gigantic room, an enormous and thin screen showing realistic videos of a snowy tundra, as a light snow falls on top of the trees. She's able to witness such landscape through the brother's eyes, again, a promise from long time ago.

Mafuyu serves as her eyes and protector since the girl came into the world, ignoring all else and silently focusing the eyesight so she can enjoy it to the max, a fake nature, yet it brings comfort.

Never allowed to try for friends, as the doctors redeem her immune system too weak to be close to others, so the young men turned into something more that just a brother, a friend, a father figure and someone who wished nothing more that her well being. The two would spend hours playing or watching television, in the beginning he didn't hesitated to believe in the sight story, and when the truth that Yuki never existed came to be, Mafuyu one more time jump to the ``It's okay`` part, talking with their parents and explaining what it meant, for the youngest they share more that blood, someone who took over all of possible roles, the burning feeling irradiating in the lower abdomen fades when she can rest her head on the teen shoulder, sure that nothing out there can bring harm to the siblings.

An imaginary gust of wind blows the Uzume hair, as the elder sibling beside smiles and laughs, revealing to be the one blowing the air, extending the playful moment to the max.

they cares not about what happened in the past or that others misses the old world, as not even the apocalypse could change the family routine, or the parents lack of attention to their children, since the beginning, he remembers the adult overworking themselves to the extreme, leaving the siblings without a guide, Mafuyu felt lost for years, not sure if those two people were his parents or just someone that shares the same blood, when Reira announced another pregnancy, he knew that the same fate waited the infant, a life of loneliness, and to never hear a parent saying ``I love you``, fearing this future, the teen took over the duty of raising a child by himself. Is no secret that the girl considers the brother as a father, showing this trust by only speaking next to him, as she craves the safety and reassurance that comes with the elder Uzume presence, and he never hide this honor that it feels to be someone comfort person.

The father, a charming Chinese men in his late forties approaches. Yi Han stands out thanks to the glorious dark hair brushed in a classic and refined hairstyle, a well chosen dark blue suit and the silk skin, leaving no space to comments about flaws, while the fellow scientists worries about work, the men prioritize the physical appearance over looking clever all the time.

How the men ignores the younger child enkindles rage within Mafuyu, ``A parent should always know where his children are``, yet the youngest replies with silence, non concern to hid the scorn growing towards the men. The siblings carries on their moment, Yi takes that as a defeat, looking over the future of the family, wondering if the methods of raising they are valid, or just a cruel way to treat an eleven year old child, a sensation of shame overcomes the men smooth persona, choosing to step away before any flaw can be shown in front of others.

The father-daughter relationship had been damaged years ago, as Yi Han refused to believed about the sight and her decision of no longer wanting to pretend to be a boy, claiming that such important decision should've been delayed due to insufficient age, blaming Mafuyu influence and the heat of the moment, the lack of support pushed her away from the him, hurt beyond word. With the head of Saga paying for everything, and how the brother hold her hand at every second, Miyako went forward with the new life, going through treatment and last year a surgery to end the circle, mistaking the corporation gesture for kindness, yet the goal strayed from that good, a way to keep the child under their wings and docile, a solution to make sure that she couldn't leave the shelter or abandoned the cause, to enhanced their trust further, the pharmaceutical company developed a tiny device into a specific area of the body, assuring that the technology would avoid the necessity of daily hormones pills. A factor that seal a bound between the girl and the company, seeing the CEO as a hero of some sort, someone that aid in the most dire moment, able to enjoy life as Miyako, a name picked by the brother. The solo demand made by the company happened to be a small thing, cooperation, and nothing more. A contract signed by the child to assist in a project to adapt the sight to soldiers, so they could hijack into infected minds and gain upper hand, despite believing in this supernatural gift, the head scientist cared not to make it a project, using it as a mere mean to an end.

One would think that the end of the world could bring people together, but it didn't, the mother spend most of the days working in the dream of manufacturing a vaccine, or at least something to retard the effect of the virus, while Yi Han makes sure that the shelter geothermal power plant remains in working order. Mafuyu takes the promise to an honorable level, even joining her in classes about electronics, mechanics, medicine and biology, subjects from the new educational system, a way to create a better future, so the new generation can grow knowing the most important lessons instead of dwelling in past history or unnecessary mathematics. Despite finding those five hours boring, she cherishes every second of it, as what follows it in the schedule its never pleasant.

When the experiment time begins, Mafuyu has to leave, not a single test is harmless, each holding their own amount of pain or discomfort. Recalling about yesterday, the scientist attempted to created a theory about how the brain connect itself with the sight, looking for a logical way to explain the ability of seeing through others eyes. A thin and silver needle penetrate through the lower eye until it reached the brain, the whole procedure took place under heavy anesthesia, yet the pain grew harder to withstand afterward, worse that an emotional hollowness, a feeling that shocked through the brain and the nervous system.

However, a worst one exist, The Helmet, or so she calls it, a metal device is introduced on the head, then electrical stimulus are send to the brain, a way to improve her eyes and recover a tiny fraction of the natural sight, it makes the body fake a scenario where each centimter of skin melts, every cell and fiber deteriorates, reaching an astonishing level of fading, only to be wake by the same pain, left with no choice, but to endure it the most brutal five minutes of the day, it happened several times, and it can't seen to get better anytime soon. The shock waves suffering is staggering, yet she judges as a necessary evil, willing to make this sacrifice, blind by manipulation and scared of the chance of Saga sending the family away from the shelter, not willed to put Mafuyu into harm ways, or to sacrifice the parents career.

Using the girl lack of direction and the endless search for a purpose to created a perfect harmony, as Miyako feels like a sheep in a forest full of werewolves, a part of her believes that the suffering can be justify, and the other she deserves the pain coming from those test.

Regardless of the brother encouragement words, remanding how important her life is, the child refuses to see in the same way, seeing herself as a pillar, holding back the corruption from crumbling under the one she loves, willing to continue with the penitence, just for a small glance of a better tomorrow.

#women writers #artists on tumblr #book blog #reading #writing #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #creative writing #horror #zombie #horror writing

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zooophagous · 2 years

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I'm telling you, it was a God damn vampire."

The tense man waved his hands for emphasis. Ursula maintained her cool facade. Of course he was correct, the description of the mysterious assailant was easy enough to positively ID. But she wasn't about to tell HIM that.

"Hmm. What makes you say vampire, Mr. Erickson?"

"Look, I know crazy drunks can bite too. I've seen enough fights. But there was something... I don't know. He was fucking creepy, ok?"

"Is that all?"

"He had sharp teeth AND freaked out when I threw garlic at him."

"And you're certain he wasn't just freaking out because you stepped in at all?"

"No, I saw it burn him. He had red marks all over where I hit him. That was a vampire. That was a Goddamned vampire!"

"Mr. Erickson." Ursula clicked her pen and put her paper pad away. "You've been very helpful with our missing person investigation, so I'll be perfectly honest with you. Vampires are not real. Our dear friend Mr. Strauss however is very sick, physically and mentally. He needs to be brought back into care for his own good. Please understand because of HIPAA I cannot disclose to you the specifics about what is wrong with him, but any relevant vaccines or other medical care the injured party requires will be compensated, as will any theft."

"I'm not really worried about that. I'm only down one beer. Sam gets workman's comp. He needed stitches though, just so you know. You should do a better job keeping your patients off the streets. Hey, this guy wasn't contagious with anything was he? He looked like total shit."

"The condition Mr. Strauss has cannot be passed on by a simple superficial bite like this. I understand your concern but if your friend keeps his wound clean it will heal on its own. Unless he tried to take a bite out of Strauss to get back at him." She huffed a little laugh through her nose, then paused. "...He didn't, did he?"

"I uh. I don't think so? Not that I saw. I don't think Sam is dumb enough to put his mouth on the guy."

"Well. Double check with him, and if he has done something that stupid, call me here." She scrawled a number quickly and handed it over to the shaken bartender.

"You still ain't caught the guy huh."

"No. But shortly he will be very hungry and dehydrated. He will appear soon, and we'll be ready. Thank you for your help, Mr. Erickson. You may go."

Strauss awoke blearily in his cardboard dumpster shelter. The tears in his eyes had frozen overnight in the cold, and he wiped them painfully away as he stretched. It was daylight, he could see it streaming through the slight gap between the lid and the metal hull. He had been awakened by noise in the alley.

A terrible deep rumble of some kind of truck, which was drawing nearer and nearer. The sound began to make him panic, and he shoved his way out of the receptacle in time to startle a waste management employee who had come by to collect the recycling. The man cried out in surprise, but didn't try to stop him. Strauss ran down the alley in his damp slippers. So much for shelter. And now the sun was out too, peaking from behind hazy grey clouds. He pulled his jacket up over his head as far as he could get it, but he would have to find real shelter soon.

He looked up and down the little street at the different shops. That was cover from sunlight, sure, but it was also proximity to people. Proximity to stressors, to temptation, to witnesses- and he remembered how well that went. He still had the stinging welts.

He would have worse to worry about though if he didn't make a decision fast. The heat on his skin was already uncomfortable mere moments after being exposed. He walked at a brisk pace, as if he could outrun the sun. He kept his head bent down, squinting blindly in the daylight.

He didn't really have much idea where he was going, except that it was towards a thick of trees in what appeared to be some manner of park. There were people in the park, but not as many as were in the shops. He stepped into the little cluster of trees and pressed off the sidewalk as deep as he could go. The park was adjacent to a river, and along the broken steep bank of the river was salvation. A drainage pipe- a massive one, easily large enough to accommodate a man. Jack pot.

A heavy grate was over the entrance, or perhaps it was heavy to an ordinary man. Strauss found his way past it and curled up in the dark. It was wet in here, too. He inwardly wondered if he would ever be dry again. His wet mildew smell was now accompanied by a fresh coat of mud. There was no blending in casually now, looking so utterly wretched. Cloud cover looked to be rolling in, slowly. Maybe if it got a bit thicker he could venture out and find something to eat.

Artemis sat in the driver's side of the black sedan and stared down glumly at her phone. A set of photos had just finished downloading, treating her to the grisly spectacle of the bouncer's arm, marred by a deep gash, and a second photo where it had been repaired with an ugly set of ten dark stitches.

"Is it bad?" Troy asked shyly as he craned is neck from the passenger seat to get a glimpse of her phone.

"Yeah, it's pretty bad. Can't lie." She sighed heavily.

"So what, then, he decided to just go rogue and start picking people off?"

"Thing about that is, Troy, I don't really think that's what he did." She stowed the phone. "I know it sounds like I'm making excuses for him but this is really out of character. Both his stated morals and his history don't really mesh with this. I think he did it under duress."

"You sure you're not just giving him too much credit?"

"I'm not saying it just because he's my friend. Look at the way it happened. I mean, Strauss is sheltered but he's not stupid. He's been around a couple hundred years, he knows how this all works. He isn't about to break out, and then immediately attack someone in public where there's witnesses. It's really stupid to do this if you're not trying to get caught."

"Maybe he does want to be caught? I mean, he's never really expressed that strong of an opinion about leaving. Maybe he's got regrets."

"I'm very sure he does, but I don't think he'd go THIS far just to get our attention. I think after this... he's probably too scared to let himself be found now."

"Scared of us?"

"More of Ursula than of us." She sighed. "I don't really think Auntie wants to just kill him outright either, but the way she treats him, do you think he believes that? He probably thinks this is life or death."

"Or death and REAL death, for a vampire."

"Right."

"So where do we go from here?"

"Well, I think he's going to want to keep moving. It's supposed to rain today, so I have a hunch he'll be out during day time to try and make some tracks. We've got people watching for him at the bus stations and the Amtrak, so hopefully by keeping it to a foot chase we can slow him down."

"Never thought I'd get to see a Van Helsing actually hunt a vampire. Wish I could say it was kind of cool."

"Yeah, Troy, wish I could say I was enjoying it."

Strauss waited till he could see ripples on the river's surface to emerge again. It had started to rain, so now would be a fine chance to capture a bird or a squirrel. His assault on the bouncer the other night had given him a nice little hit of blood, but he'd been 'interrupted' before getting a decent share. He'd have to go get more.

He was torn between feeling remorseful for harming a complete stranger and angry he wasn't able to get more out of him. If he was to commit the sin of attacking a human he could have at least gotten a full meal. No such luck.

There didn't seem to be mice in the park. He was very reluctant to move from his list of safe foods, but it was just another concession he now had to make. Squirrels were close enough. Larger, too- he could get three mice worth out of one large squirrel he was sure. They were also incredibly common. He could see several of them just out in the open, accustomed to humans and unafraid.

He wished he'd tried the park first, could have spared everyone so much trouble. He quietly plodded after a fat squirrel that lazily scampered away from him. Once close enough, he extended his will over it. A wild squirrel was a little harder to wrangle than a domestic mouse, but not by much. The squirrel stopped running, and sat still. He wandered over to it and picked it up. He clicked his jaws open wide and prepared to drain it.

"What are you doing?"

He stopped. In his focus on the squirrel, he'd forgotten there were still people in the park. He turned around to see a child. A little girl, barely five if that, in a bright pink coat, looking up at him expectantly.

He looked at the squirrel and then looked around. "Where are your parents. You should not talk to strangers."

"Are you eating the squirrel?"

He tilted his head at the question. "Yes."

"Why?"

He was a bit dumbfounded at her question. He wasn't about to lie to a child, however.

"I am a vampire. Do you see my fangs?" He bared his teeth at her. "I need to eat blood. The squirrel has blood."

"Oh." She looked at the squirrel and pouted her lips.

"Does it make you sad that I am going to eat the squirrel?" He sighed.

"Uh-huh."

He rolled his eyes. "Alright. I will let the squirrel go. Here, I will set him in this tree." He turned and placed the dazed rodent in a low branch. And for good measure, plucked an acorn from the grass and shoved it into the little animal's confused paws.

"There. Better?"

"Yeah." She grinned a gap toothed little smile. Then, as randomly as she had appeared, she ran off again. Strauss followed her with his eyes until he spotted her parents coming to collect her. Good, she wasn't out unsupervised, then. He turned on his heels and walked off before the parents noticed the scruffy vagabond that had been talking to their child.

She was a dear. Very similar to his own, when he had her. But fond memories didn't fill stomachs. He didn't want a squirrel anyway. Maybe if he were clever he could find a source of mice. Now, where in a city would one find a ready supply of that?

"So, any luck?" Artemis asked the cell phone flatly.

"He isn't in the cemetery, he hasn't been spotted at any coffee shop, and he hasn't been to the library so far as we can tell." Ursula replied.

"Have there been any other bite reports?"

"No, and he better hope it stays that way. I'm waiting on the dog team to arrive now. With any luck he's sleeping and will be easy to track."

"Ok. Keep me posted." Artemis ended the call with a sigh.

"I don't know, Artie." Troy shrugged. "I feel like we're doing this wrong."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, Strauss is very particular about the way he wants things. He doesn't like change. We should be checking gyms to see if he's used their showers. We could see if the Walmart has had anyone trying to sleep in their home goods section. Or... his favorite food is mice, right?"

"Yes?"

"Ok, so where can we find mice. He's gotta be getting hungry. Is there a pet store here?"

Artemis nodded. It was as good a lead as any.

"There's a Pets R Inn on 7th, it can't hurt to try."

#long post #writing #wayward souls

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daryldixonsdoormat · 2 years

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Wade walker usually didn’t get involved with Squares or Women of any kind. Pepper and the rest of the group (apart from hatchet face) was completely convinced that Squares was Crybaby’s type. Of course you knew who Crybaby Walker was, he was the talk amongst the drapes and sang at jamborees. You are no little miss priss, you were a drape and surprisingly you didn’t cause a ruckus. You got in minor trouble every other day to embrace who you really are, but never more than slashing a squares tires. Allison was a acquaintance, she was a magnificent friend in middle school before money and where your from really mattered. She let go after freshman year, it was a real nasty argument, not long after the yelling her grandmother kicked you out. Insulting you’re clothing, music, the way you talk even chalking it all up to ‘hoodlum’ behavior. Alison didn’t scold or confront her grandmother for disrespecting your way of living. She shrugged it off and walked into her room without a word of goodbye.

It’s yearly vaccines, everyone has to yet shots for the school year and I’m still waiting in line. Alison is supposed to go next after the girl in the chair stops crying and gets off the stool. Pettiness is the only answer here of course, nurses can’t stop me from getting my shots even if I cut Alison in the Squares line. As she walks up to get on the stool I take a long stride in-front of her so quickly her hair moves from the air. I peel of my leather jacket and sit onto the stool while the nurse/doctor preps the needle. I smile at Alison who is struggling to be lady like and not glare. I stick my right hand up to shield the doctors view and I flip her off on the other side of my hand. She gasps rather dramatically and hits her boyfriends chest to look at my finger. I put my finger down before he could see not wanting to cause too big of a scene infront of so many. Squares have no problem causing a scene because they know there will be no consequences, a bunch of them are pushing Crybaby to the front of the drape line. He flings off his leather jacket partially it hanging off his elbows. He looks pissed, maybe it’s because of the shots or the rich kids seeming to think they can shove people around. Literally. They rub the alcohol pads on our arms and I look away trying to find something to distract me from the long ass needle Crybaby Walker was definitely a sight for sore eyes. A perfect distraction, he wasn’t supposed to turn towards me and catch me staring. I turn my head quickly closing my eyes, only to turn back seconds later to see him a tear rolling down his cheek. Is that way they call him Crybaby or is it something else.

We are dismissed as soon as we get the vaccine or to wherever we damn well please. Coincidentally I don’t have any where to go, no family, no friends I could trust to house me. Most nights are spent outside under the school bleachers or where all the jamborees are. No point of walking to a unknown destination when I could just hitch a ride off someone. It’s kinda ironic that Crybaby and his crew/family? Is leaning against a black car waiting for something to happen. I walk across the street and stop after the traffic lady persists I look both ways. I make a beeline to the group who have already took notice to my intentions of a conversation. “Hi Pepper. Everyone else” I’ve talked to Pepper a few times nothing spectacular though. Pepper nods and the rest of the group share snarky or relaxed looks when addressed. Crybaby lights a match from the inside of his mouth just to put it out on his tongue. Why? No idea but I would be lying if I said it didn’t make me more fond of him. “Crybaby, you think I could hitch a ride?” I say standing steady direct eye contact is always the way to ask for a ride. “Sure I could give a pretty little thing like you a lift” he says circling me before leaving back on his car. All is set there is a small period of silence before I get knocked into from the side by the one and only Alison. She swear aye back and forth on her heals smiling so bright it could blind someone. “Hi” sounds like she nearly yelled it at him the group looks at her with mischief, they want to make her a drape. “ You wanna tag along with us to the jamboree . I’ll be singing tonight.” ��he looks back over to me and asks if I would be interested as well. Alison boyfriends clasps onto mine and her shoulders, wanting to save two girls that shouldn’t be associating with drapes. He bling or either lost his mind, this guy remembers the few times I dressed up pretty to try and get on Alison’s grandmothers side. “Get your filthy hands off of me Bladwin. I ain’t no square, your girlfriend is” eyes are shifting all over the place going from Me to Alison back to Baldwin and then her grandmother. And a few rude comments and full fledged glares the squares leave and so do we.

AN: I’m making a part two definitely maybe a part three and it’s gonna be steamy (the make out scene).

#crybaby walker x y/n #crybaby walker x you #wade walker x you #wade walker x y/n #wade walker x reader #crybaby x reader #CRYBABY IS SO CUTE

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spookiifi · 2 years

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Lo-fi Beats for Alternates Only

This fanfic is based off of Alex Kister’s Mandela Catalogue series on Youtube. I highly suggest checking out his content before reading this fic.

Sidenote: This work of fiction is not meant to have a happy ending nor is it shipping. BUT we do get to meet our dear Six (intruder) and Alt!Gabriel in the worst ways.

Maybe the best ways for some of you. Enjoy.

Reader is gender neutral!

ao3 link!

Warnings: Alternates, manipulation, horror elements, gore, body horror and violence. Read at your own risk

Half asleep, you finished the written portion of your college exam. Never did the send button look so welcoming. It was your last one before your digital graduation. Your clock read 11:58; the video portion would have to be late, but that really didn’t bother you.

Several red bull and cold brew cans litter the room. The small trash bin is towered with 5 hour bar wrappers and great value energy drink cans.

Even though you hated the idea, your zoom camera had to be used for the video portion of the exam.

Half of the people in your class had gone missing, and you’d think your classes would have cancelled. One of them was diagnosed with M.A.D. They were admitted and they never returned to class. They might as well be dead to the world.

But no, the show must go on. Class from home was the best option, even though they specifically said that all mirrors and webcams were prohibited. Anything to do with screens, television, or any reflective surface were to be destroyed without question.

You tried to focus on classwork, despite the apartment complex right next to yours blasting music. Your neighbor “didn’t believe in alternates” saying that it was some sort of theory to keep people paranoid. She gave off the save vibe of a Karen that didn’t believe in vaccines.

You rubbed your eyes and popped open another energy drink, getting back to work with trying to record. Maybe you should just give up and wait until the am hours where she’d probably stop blasting tunes through the paper-thin walls.

Just one ten-minute rest period, that would be it.

Thirty minutes passed instead.

The sound of bloody murder screaming jolted you out of your unconscious state of mind. You could hear your neighbor screaming for help, a thud, then silence.

Your biggest mistake was peering through the boarded-up window, only to find the lights off. The worst decision of your life.

And a hooded figure staring right back at you.

A sudden knock at your bedroom door made you jump.

“I’m sorry that I blasted music while you were studying. I won’t do it again. Why don’t let me in so I can apologize?” Your neighbor never sounded that sweet. She was known for being a stuck up teenager that never said “Sorry.” Fuck, what was the T.H.I.N.K principle, what was the principle? Your mind was drawing a blank as the alternate chanted to be let in. How the hell did it get past your bolted front door?

“I have a housewarming gift that I think you’ll love.” You’d lived in that same apartment for several years. This wasn’t your neighbor.

At this point, you resorted to hiding under the desk and grabbed a metal bat next to your office chair.

“Let me in let me in let me in.” Every word started to grow more violent and sickly sweet. The creature slammed its hands on the door repeatedly, thank god you locked it.

If there really was a God. These alternates wouldn’t exist if there was one.

“LET ME IN DAMN IT.” The being screeched your name VERONICA open the open the door please .

The alternate’s footsteps faded, and you sighed in relief….only to hear them getting louder and louder. You could hear the wooden door breaking into several pieces as the creature body-slammed it open. Huddling your body as close to the desk as possible, you watched as the intruder’s shoes paced your carpet floor, their heavy breathing blocking out your thought process. It was almost as if they were waiting for you to make a move.

“I just want to talk. Come out.” What used to be your neighbor’s voice now turned into a scratching whisper.

With your weapon gripped tight, you readied yourself until their back was turned. You lanced out at the alternate, landing a blow on their jaw. The same hooded figure hissed and held its head.

You stepped back a couple feet to gain some hitting space. Raising your weapon, you moved to hit again, but the alternate caught your wrist, fully twisting it clockwise. You screamed as fiery pain coursed through your broken wrist. The bat clattered to the floor.

The intruder grinned and used his free hand to grip your throat, squeezing as tight as possible.

You landed a hard kick on the intruder’s chest, and they reeled back into the wall. Still holding the bat in your hands, you carefully knelt down next to the intruder. They didn’t have a pulse.

“…Did I kill it?”

The last thing you remember was the intruder whirling around, their fist making direct contact with your face.

Then blackness

“Wake up.”

A huge gust of wind brushed past you, and blinding light filled your vision. A figure emerged from the light. Gabriel stood before you, his robes flowing with the wind. Two giant feathered wings unfolded from his back.

You were dead, you had to be dead. But your bedroom was still here.

“Ah, good. I saved you just in time.” He smiled down at you and offered his hand. “And here I thought you were dead.”

This wasn’t right. Nothing about this angel felt welcoming to you.

Even though you could barely stand, you refused to lose consciousness. You could only see out of one eye from being hit, making it more difficult to make out his appearance. Blood still dripped from your broken nose.

“I’ve never seen a human try to murder an alternate.”

A false prophet.

“Murder?! I was trying to-“ You shook off the thought as you sat up, wincing at your broken wrist. “Who are you and what the fuck do you want with me?”

Gabriel pulled his hand away. “Isn’t it obvious? I’m your true savior.” He stepped closer and kneeled down. “All I need is your eternal loyalty to me.”

“Are you going to kill me? Turn me into that…thing that knocked me out cold?”

“If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve done so while you were asleep.” The facade that hid Gabriel’s large grin and eyes faded away. “Now, where were we??”

“Wh-what are you?” You scrambled backward for safety but he grabbed your arm and chin.

“Your one and only god, and you’re a fool for believing that I’d let you go so easily.”

For my first Mandela fic, I think I did pretty well.

So much for your video exam

Gabe hun, I didn’t mean to call you a false prophet. It was for the content. I still think you’re the realest.

Anyway, hydrate or DIEDRATE everyone.

#sus gabriel #alternate gabriel #tmc intruder #tmc six #the mandela catalogue #analog horror #tmc gabriel

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phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess · 2 years

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Random Self-care suggestions from tired adults:

Brush your teeth, listen to me... you get one set of adult teeth and dentistry is expensive. And take your meds. And get vaccinated for the love of FUCK.

Pre-diced frozen veggies. Seriously, people, sometimes you can have all the ingredients, but a full sweet potato can just drain your willpower if its been a Big Day. Get yourself some pre-diced and/or frozen vegies an whack 'em in the freezer.

Canned Fruit / Fruit Salad Fresh fruit is great, but can be very anxiety inducing when you have a 20sec window to eat the damn thing... there is nothing inherently wrong with having some canned fruit around. IS it as fresh as it could be? No. But it's still fruit.

Change your pillows once per year (at least) Esp, if you have respiratory issues or sensitivities. After 12 months, you have dust, dustmites, their poop, dead skin, and all manner of body fluids (sweat, drool, tears, other) in them. CHANGE THEM.

Have a second bank account for savings You can slide two bucks in there each pay or whatever, but there is a level of stress that can be taken off knowing that if you suddenly have an unexpected household/vet bill or all your teeth turn into goblin scholars... you can at least make a downpayment for urgent support. And be open with a vet or dentist, bc mostly they have payment plan options as long as you can meet a minimum deposit. [There is VetPay in Australia, too, aparently]

Shopping list Your brain will be salsa by the time you get to 5pm or later most days, have a post it note with cryptic scribbles or maybe a stone tablet reminding you to complain about a certain merchant... it stops the "Ah, fuck... I forgot the..." moment. But also be nice to yourself. We all fucking forget something several times over, that's adulthood.

Basic Meds In your home, you should have some basic stuff in a first aid drawer. IF you're on a farm, you probs have one. Super stark basics are painkillers, bandaids, a bandage, tweezers, lozenges, hydralite or similar dehydration support, berocca or similar (similar for rehydration), cold and flu stuff, tissues, lipbalm and similar. Please be careful of using ibuprofen if you are on SSRIs.

Bulk / Reuseable If you use things like handsoap or laundry soup, you can get a BIIIIG bottle that refills the smaller ones several times over. It can be very helpful in the household if you can afford it.

Premade Meals Nothing wrong with something that can be bunged into the microwave or oven. Quick and easy still counts, and is better than hungry.

Variety Silly, but true. You will get bored of routine rapidly. A multipack of something with multiple options (eg. the little cereal packets of different kinds, chips, etc) can give soe general variety without making you go out of your way to make things Magical.

Make a Treat Put whipped cream on your ice cream. Put some jelly in the fridge and let it set so future you gets a snack. Buy the pre-made cookie dough and cook yourself something. Feels good to Make Things. Plus, a treat.

Do a physical craft, hobby or task. Especially if you are an anxious person, having a small task to do with your hands can and will help to ground you. Even if it is just a crossword puzzle in a magazine, etc. IT gives you a sense of achievement, releases physical tension, and you can make fun stuff. [ALSO: Make bad art / don't try to monetise your hobby See #5, but don't place expectations on yourself. IF you muck up five or twenty time sbut get it on the 21st? Hell yeah. >Listen to me, the people on etsy and similar sites? They spend a LOT of time and effort and money to create and provide those items. This is, in effect, mostly their Job. It's okay to just have something you do for fun, you don't need a side hustle! You don't have to turn every waking moment into profit! It will make you miserable.]

Do not listen to youtube ads / MLM propaganda All that bullshit about 'only work 4 hours and make $$$$' is MLM nonsense. It's a scam, ignore it. Also don't buy things that youtubers are made to shill to you... there' a bunch of good posts about how shitty those things are.

Work out a fragrance you like Get something that smells like it. Shower gel, soap, candle, one of those pillow sprays, etc. IT woill make you feel better.

Sheets Change them. Weekly. At the absolute max, fortnightly. I know it's a bitch and a half but there's nothing on earth like being showered and on clean sheet. 10/10 baby.

Water Drink it. If you can't stand base water, do not HESITATE to try the cold water steeping stuff, and if that's as weak as nun's piss to your tastebuds, try cordial.

Clutter Don't clutter your space up, you will start to feel overwhelmed and blocked in. Get all the fun tacky ornaments you want... but make sure there is somewhere for it. Use a second person as your "Do you REALLY need it?" guy, because your Want is not always a Need. Always think about a goofy purchase (for instance, a horse-sized snorlax plush is great in theory, but where would you put it?).

Delete Candycrush / Clash of Clans / Merge Games / the other games that demand constant attention and money They won't make you happy, they want your money, they want you desperate to spend real life cash to earn that sweet extra life for... no real payout. Yeah they can be fun but pay attention to your engagement with them. Some people have lost a LOT on those little apps, because they are literally made to be addictive.

Don't Wallow If you're in the dumps and cycling through stupid shit in your brain, tell it it's bullshit and go do something that takes focus. A puzzle, talk to someone. Go straight to be in a room with other people. Hell, go to the library and just be around people or chill at the park if you can. 20. Work out local supports Check out if there's a 24/hr servo in the area that you can access in an emergency. Know how to get to the hospital. Look into what local services there are around health, housing, community engagement

Don't kill (prank or otherwise bitch about on social media) your roommate/s No matter what they do, or how annoying they can be, they are not forever. Imagine it if you must, but look for other options and get out. None of those ridiculous passive aggressive prank wars or sniping on social media. Some people don't click well in an enclosed space, it happens, but you will look ridiculous if your every social media post is a rant against X, or you do things that can be considered offences against Y. I know tiktok and the youtube prank channels make this stuff look Interesting, but it isn't. Adulthood is compromise. SElf-care is reacting in the best way you can to bad situation, because unfortunately social media is literally impacting people's jobs.

Remember that there's nothing wrong with being solo There is a lot of pressure, and more than a few people have confessed feeling that they Should Be in a relationship or with kids by 25... but remember. You are you, and your journey through life is like no one else's. Jumping from relationship to relationship can cause more harm, especially if you haven't had time to find out Who You Are outside of a Couple (or more). There's time. You've got time guys. Remind yourself that no one knows what happens next, and its only in hindsight that the thread of your life becomes an intricate pattern of choices made, paths not taken, etc. None of it is inherently wrong, just things to wonder on... if you went with B not A, etc. --------\ add to this if you can think of something off the top of your head do feel free to ask if there's another way to do something or a way to make it self care... the sade truth of adulthood is that you can, and will, get excited to have new cleaning items and more efficient ways to do stuff

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dontmeantobepoliticalbut · 1 year

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Twitter CEO Elon Musk on Sunday called to prosecute Anthony Fauci, the chief medical adviser to President Biden who has led the U.S. response to the COVID-19 pandemic since it started during the Trump administration, and drew swift backlash for his comment.

“My pronouns are Prosecute/Fauci,” Musk said on Twitter. He later shared a meme edited to show Fauci telling Biden, “Just one more lockdown, my king.”

Lawmakers and other officials jumped to Fauci’s defense online.

“I’m a big fan of Dr. Fauci and how he’s calmly guided our country through crisis. Re Musk tweet? Courting vaccine-deniers doesn’t seem like a smart business strategy, but the issue is this: could you just leave a good man alone in your seemingly endless quest for attention?” Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-Minn.) said on Twitter.

Rep. Dean Phillips (D-Minn.) wrote on Twitter, “It’s America. You can select any pronouns you damn well please. But Anthony Fauci has likely saved more human lives than any living person in the world. Shame on you.”

Former CIA Director John Brennan called Fauci a “national hero” and accused Musk of stoking hatred.

“Dr. Fauci is a national hero who will be remembered for generations to come for his innate goodness & many contributions to public health Despite your business success, you will be remembered most for fueling public hate & divisions. You may have money, but you have no class,” Brennan said in a reply to Musk.

Rep. Ritchie Torres (D-N.Y.) said Musk “wants to criminalize Anthony Fauci because he disagrees with him” and hit at the Twitter CEO for hypocrisy in his free-speech claims.

Since Musk’s controversial takeover of the social media platform, concerns about content moderation on the site have surged, with reports of an uptick in racist and antisemitic messages on the site.

Musk has tried to situate himself as a champion of free speech and a mouthpiece for the public, using the Latin phrase “Vox Populi, Vox Dei,” which means “The voice of the people is the voice of God.” He also polled users on reinstating the banned Twitter account of former President Trump and on whether suspended users should get “amnesty.”

Early in the COVID-19 pandemic, Musk called concern over the virus “dumb,” and after he took over the company in late October of this year, he did away with Twitter’s policies about COVID-19 misinformation.

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) replied to to Musk’s comment about Fauci on Sunday, writing, “I affirm your pronouns Elon.”

Greene’s personal Twitter account was banned in January for violating the COVID-19 misinformation policies, but Musk reinstated her her last month in his amnesty move.

“Fauci’s resignation should not prevent a full-throated investigation into the origins of the pandemic. He must be required to testify under oath regarding any discussions he participated in concerning the Wuhan lab leak. His policies destroyed lives,” wrote Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) in response to Musk’s post.

Fauci is preparing to step down from his government roles at the end of the year and has long said he is not concerned about Republicans’ increasing calls to investigate him over the U.S. handling of the pandemic.

“I have nothing to hide at all, despite the accusations that I’m hiding something. I have nothing that I could not explain clearly to the country and justify,” Fauci told The Hill’s “In The Know” last month.

In his final appearance in the White House briefing room a few weeks ago, Fauci lamented the partisan divide that has complicated the country’s response to the COVID-19 virus.

“As a physician, it pains me because I don’t want to see anybody get infected. I don’t want to see anybody hospitalized. And I don’t want to see anybody die from COVID. Whether you’re a far-right Republican or a far-left Democrat doesn’t make any difference to me,” Fauci said.

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creedx13 · 9 months

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Jason Creed Sabertooth Part 2

The Aftermath

I just got off the train when I was engulfed In a cloud of brimstone smoke two blue arms with grippy bifractured hands grabbed me in a bear hug from the front. “Extraction incoming, hold your breath.” I do as i’m told and brace my self for the implosion of air I love my uncle but I hate this part. BAMF as soon as the smoke clears and my ears stop ringing and I have my bearings again I notice we’re in the faculty locker room. One of the nurses from the infirmary is there to. Dose everyone know about my sabertooth debacle? “Normally we’re doing this for logan” the nurse commented “what were you thinking? Kurt questions me. “ I wasn't “ I admit.

“Now here’s the procedure you strip down and hand me your clothes to be washed and then you stand against that wall and stand still for kurt to hose you down I’ll be back with clean clothes vaccines and sicky sutures and bone and joint braces you'll need to wear for a week.” she explains. I strip it’s embarasing but It’s not like they haven’t seen me naked before and neither of them care kurt’s too body positive to notice or care and nurse patty is like 46 and has seen it all and then some.

I hand her my blood soaked clothes and i stand against the wall and kurt gives me that broad mischievous grin he dose so well. ‘Now comes the fun part, for me, not for you.’ he says with a giggle. I brace myself and the gush of water hits me washing my gand father’s blood off of me and down the drain “now. put your hands up and turn around slowly.” I do as i’m told and he hoses off down my back and leggs finishing off by blasting me right in the back of the head I whip around and growl at him. My uncle just laughs. “I’m used to doing this with logan, you’re just a grubby puppy all growl no bite. You can’t scare me. But Next time please leave sabertooth to the grown ups ok? mein kleiner Schatz.” his tone switched from goofing off to worried sick real quick, we don’t have a whole lot in common like I have with logan he sometimes ropes me into his pranks or sends me bible quotes he thinks might help me but that’s about it. My uncle kurt dose love me he is the only biological family I have that Isn’t a colosal sociopath/narcissist/ homicidal maniac. I’m pretty sure the feeling is mutual. “ I don’t want anything to do with sabertooth don’t worry. I just wanted to go to the cuniform and the wild places exhibit.” I tell him. He gives me a relived smile. “We can go together on my next day off avoiding trouble is easier when you can teleport.” “ thank you.” I replied “ great now that’s sorted. get in the tub. youre still a walking biohazard, you're getting the deep cleaning protocol.” he ordered pointing at the big round bath tub. In the center of the room he poured some bubble bath in and stirred it in with one of those bath brushes with the long handel encouraging bubbles. “Step in but give me your hands your claws look as atrocious as the rest of you.” I do as i'm told keeping my hands out of the water and giving them to him over the side of the bath my armpits resting on a plush towl for comfort the rest of my body under my bath bubbles. “Arguably your claws got the worst of it.” he said distainfully pulling a long blond hair from under my middle claw taking a small chunk of flesh out with it. He looked a little disturbed by this so to break the tension I said “If you think this is bad you should see the other guy.” I grinned. Kurt just gave me a disapproving tut and swatted my hand. “No more fighting. That’s an order.” he dictated

“Yes sir.” I acknowledged.

“Good boy” nuse patty said setting her equipment up beside me. Damn, that lady Is really sneaky I guess that’s how you survive in a house full of mutant kids. “ hey, Jason ignore her, focus on me.” Kurt encourages me. “I know how you feel about needles but I need you to try your best to not bite me. Ok?” nurse patty instructs as If I was an injured wild animal. After I’m all cleaned up I only growl at nurse patty twice this time And no one got bit or scratched I’ve matured. Compared to Sabertooth nurse patty is a walk in the park. Kurt brought me a clean Xaivier’s tracksuit it's grey and green and super comfy. My uncle Kurt set me up with a blanket in the xmen’s rec room he then put an errol flynn movie on. Mr. Logan ended up joining us but I fell asleep halfway through I was so exhausted and clean and comfy I couldn’t keep my eyes open but before I blacked out I think I caught them holding hands, that's sweet, good for them welcome to the family mr. logan now he might be my uncle through Kurt and or Sabertooth. Nice, I like Mr. Logan good for Kurt. I sleep peacefully and I am thankful that my family isn’t all bad I’m glad I have Kurt and Mr. Logan to look out for me when I need them.

#x men #xavier's school for the gifted #x men comics #sabertooth #kurt wagner #wolverine #james howlett #logan howlett #james logan howlett

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tonguetiedraven · 2 years

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Just read your latest shirou fic, it's great. Can you write about people questioning shirou's upbringing to be abnormal because of the way he acts and his horrible past is brought up, maybe with the shirou-yuri-rick trio (I love them so much, damn it)

I'm going to apologize for taking a while with this, and for the fact that I'm not terribly good at any of the characters involved in Section 13. This is from Rick's pov and has him mostly watching and wondering. I hope you both enjoy <3

Tw/Cw for mentions of needles, child abuse, implied panic attack, and medical situations

— — — — — — — — —

Rick was a bit too aware that none of his friends had ever been normal. He made his living raising demons, hardly the work of someone who was 'normal' by the world's standard.

Yuri thought it was weird not to want to befriend demons. Shirou thought it was normal to glare at people wishing you a nice day and that giving a kid a beer to shut them up was perfectly okay.

They stressed him out sometimes when he thought about them living out in the world by their selves. They could take out a high ranking demon single-handedly, but he doubted either of them would know what to do with a basket of dirty laundry or a fitted sheet.

Tonight was one of the nights he wondered and worried.

It had been one of those days. One of the draining kind where Shirou looked a bit distant and Yuri looked a bit crushed. One of the days when the missions were over but there wasn't any relief of a job well done. There was just a lot of thinking and wondering where you'd miscalculated.

Rick had enjoyed his day. He'd had a simple job, and he'd gotten to spend a few hours at the farm to help raise a few cat sidhes. They were all still at the kitten stage, and clumsy despite their high demonic ranks. It was endlessly endearing to watch something that could be worshiped as a god get the zoomies, cry because they couldn't leap to the top of the cat tower, flop over and show their belly, head bump, and yowl when surprised.

It had been a good day, until he went for the annual vaccines. He'd gotten in line behind Yuri, who was behind Shirou, and it had been immediately obvious that both his friends were tense. He tried starting a conversation, and Yuri plastered on a smile that was too toothy to be sincere, while Shirou kept staring ahead with a stony expression.

The nurse gave the exorcist ahead of them the all clear, and motioned for Shirou to take the seat. He moved forward with two stiff steps, fisted his hands, and started to sit, only to go rigid and straighten right back up.

"Please sit, sir."

"I'd rather stay standing. Just hurry up and do it." Shirou's tone could rarely be described as polite, but now it was downright tense and barely not a growl.

Yuri was just as stiff. Her hands were clenched nervously, and she was watching Shirou with a nervous sort of frown.

The nurse gave an annoyed sort of huff and pulled the new packet out. She tugged Shirou's sleeve up, unwrapped the needle, and stepped towards him to--

Shirou abruptly jerked away with a sharp breath and knocked over the nurses tray. She gasped in surprise, raising her hands and the needle. Shirou shot back from it like it was a gun instead of a small inoculation. He growled out some words, shoved the chair towards her so she had to jump out of the way, and bolted from the room, knocking a guard out of his way and fleeing.

"Oh no," Yuri mumbled, and started after him only to stop after two steps.

"What was that about?"

Yuri gave him a nervous look and forced a smile that didn't show here teeth. "Nothing. Shirou just doesn't like needles. Come on. Let's go ahead and get this done so we can get a drink."

Okay...

No. It was weird.

— — — — — — — — —

Shirou hated needles. Which, fair. A lot of people hated needles.

Shirou hated strapped chairs. Just walking by a strapped chair — the kind they used for interrogations or for holding down possessed victims.

Shirou wouldn't stand near beakers. Any time they had to go near the farm labs or a mission took them somewhere with anything that resembled chemistry equipment, he didn't go near it and he'd keep it in his view the entire time.

He woke up in a hospital gown once and promptly ripped it off. He'd torn the iv out and tried to bolt from the room, only stopping because Rick was in his way.

Rick wasn't sure Shirou had recognized him, or if he'd recognized the uniform. It took a couple of seconds and several blinks for his friend to seem to realize there wasn't any reason to flee. He'd returned to the bed but refused to put back on the hospital gown. Rick found the clothes he'd been brought in with, and got him to put those on seconds before Yuri came in. (She'd be annoyed when she found out she had missed naked Shirou.)

It was one thing to be nervous about medical equipment, but it was more than just that.

Rick was patient when it counted — you had to be patient to be a tamer — and Shirou required a lot of patience for everything. It was obvious Yuri knew what was going on, but she didn't like talking about Shirou. Well, no. She loved talking about Shirou. She just didn't like talking about Shirou's past.

Neither of them did.

But she also hated watching Shirou struggle, so Rick waited until they were all required to get a new round of shots.

Shirou was drunk this time, got to the point of the nurse approaching him with the needle, and once again bolted from the room, knocking two people over this time.

He got his shots and took Yuri to get a drink. Rick could be patient when it counted, but he also knew when he didn't have to be. He was going to figure out what was going on, and he was going to help.

— — — — — — — — — —

Of course the story — what Yuri knew of it at least — was horrible. She only told him bits and pieces, but Shirou hadn't been with the rest of the recruits in school for a reason. While they were learning maths and researching death verses, Shirou was being tortured. While they were eating lunches in the school yard and throwing paper wads at each other, Shirou was being vivisected and isolated.

So yeah, disliking needles was probably the least weird thing that could come out of something like that, and now Rick just wanted to wrap his friend in cotton and keep him safe.

But Shirou wasn't the type to let anyone treat him gently, so it wasn't going to be as easy as that.

Ugh. Stubborn idiot.

— — — — — — — — — —

The first thing he tried was saying nothing, but that didn't exactly work because he just kept looking at Shirou and wondering. Wondering if he had a lot of scars under that coat, wondering if he had a lot of other ticks, and wondering why it had happened. He kept watching, and he had to look panicked because Yuri stepped on his foot multiple times and gave him a pointed glare until he sort of smoothed out his expression and said something — usually a terrible joke — way too loudly.

Shirou would stare at him for a long moment, trying to figure out why he was acting weird. Then Yuri would kick him again, and that wasn't going to keep working.

He couldn't bring it up, obviously. Shirou would be pissed he knew, and Yuri would be pissed he blabbed.

So the next thing he tried was intervening. On the few missions they got to work together, he'd make sure to put himself between his friend and any lab type equipment, and that didn't really seem to draw any attention.

Then on the next day when they had to get inoculations -- because there was an endless amount of venoms and diseases and terrible things demons could inflict on you and True Cross would never stop trying to make sure they were prepared for them. Rick pulled strings and cashed in favors, and got Shirou away on a mission for it.

It worked twice, and then Shirou caught on.

There was, surprisingly, less yelling than he expected. There was yelling, of course, but mostly there were glares, a shove (better than the punch Shirou would have once given), and a lot of ignoring.

Rick still put himself between Shirou and lab equipment, and still made sure to discreetly tell the nurse on vaccine days that Shirou needed space.

Finally: "Whatever Yuri told you about it, she exaggerated."

"Told me about what?"

Shirou glared for a moment, worked his jaw, and finally nodded. "Nothing. And it's gonna stay that way."

"Of course."

Shirou glared for a few more seconds. Rick passed him a beer and reclined in his seat. "Soda's looking for a dragoon for a mission on Thursday. I thought you might be interested."

Shirou's eyes narrowed. "Yeah? Why?"

"Because I thought you'd be interested. No reason."

It wasn't like Shirou needed to know that they were giving flu shots on Thursday. If Shirou was with Soda in France, well, it wouldn't hurt anyone.

None of Rick's friends were normal, but Rick didn't mind helping where he could.

#ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #my tumblr fics #aoex #thanks for the ask!

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