I’m so bored, honestly why do I have to live so far away from all my mutuals. Like most of you all aren’t just in different countries, you’re on a different continent, it’s rude 😝
Imagine if we all lived by each other, the movie nights and cuddle puddles we could have, full of dommes and puppy boys and cat girls, we’d never want to leave, it’d be paradise on Earth 😍😍🥰
Yet chances are I’ll never get to meet any of you irl 🥺
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just thinking about coming home from work at the end of a long week and being tired from it all, but nico is right there ready to take care of you no matter what. getting you comfy, snuggling with you and playing with your hair as you fall asleep in his arms which makes him just the absolute happiest
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“Let us the land which Heav’n appoints, explore;
Appease the winds, and seek the Gnossian shore”
- from the Aeneid, translated by John Dryden
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No drug gets me as high as the look in their eyes when it’s finally just us and the space between us seems to be endless yet so so small
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It’s the radio silence that’s replaced the long conversations, the laughs and joy, that make nights like these worse.
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healing
It’s not an evil thing to look at yourself with kindness
Your life was never meant to be a punishment
But that doesn’t mean that it won’t feel like it at times
I tell myself to stop attacking the past versions of me
They were doing the best they could at the time
And that’s worth being grateful for
Is this what growing up is?
Just leaving things behind
Over and over again?
Too much self reflection is not a good thing
Even if they say you have to look back to keep moving forward
Which is dumb because you’ll just end up walking into a wall
But if you reflect too much
You end up lost
Infinitely refracting
A never ending house of mirrors
That you didn’t even pay to get in
But you’d pay anything to get out
Even if you break through the mirrors
You’d find yourself stuck in a merry go round
In the middle of a carnival, but
There is no audience to perform for
No trapeze artists swinging from extrapolations
No psychics seeking guidance from the divine
There are no actors playing no roles
Except the role of two lovers, both cast to me
An enemies to lovers romance between me and myself
But this time
There is no one to convince
You just have to let it go
You’re allowed to unlearn who you’ve been
if it isn’t who you are
Or who you want to be anymore
I’m allowed to learn who I want to be can be anything
Or it can be nothing.
There are no deadlines
I promise you, little by little
The healing adds up
You just have to stick around long enough to notice
And when your cup runneth over
And the night is dark and damp
The moon shining observantly above
I realize I’m where I meant to be
Maybe not where I want to be
But I know how to walk forward
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My new hyperfixation is DnD, has been for almost a month now. I haven't drawn so much in 2 years or been excited about something.
But... Again... I feel like i can't share my excitement with anyone because it becomes overbearing for them. I have my character and would love to play/rp but it seems like nobody matches my energy or cares.
I guess it's gonna be one more interest I keep to myself.
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i feel like a lot of the 'i hate kids' crowd would be more tolerant if they understood that due to a kid's limited experience of the world that 4 hour flight might just be the longest they've ever had to sit still for or that trapped finger might literally be the most pain they've ever felt in their short life or they might not have ever seen a person with pink hair ever so of course they want to touch it or nobody's told them yet that they can't run around the museum and they only just learned cheetahs are the fastest animals so of course they want to put that to the test. how were they supposed to know etc etc.
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