#just reflecting

[hellcourt-v]

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk sukuna #sukuna #ryomen sukuna #jjk higuruma #higuruma hiromi #higuruma #Have a nice year ‘cause I won’t #just reflecting #no excuses

[summerwages]

mesmerizing reflected ripples..

zooming in maximizes the ripple effect..do they still make that stuff?

#oregon #cold water #just reflecting #summer vibes

[mashriqiyyah]

Listen up, if you're in pain. Or any situation that makes you feel stuck and you find yourself making Dua for relief desperately...this is for you.

I know, it hurts like hell, you cannot even form words sometimes and all you want is one moment of peace and contentment to enter your heart on what has happened with you. You're making sincere Dua too, I know...but the aching doesn't seem to stop, so you're wondering if your Dua is not sincere enough, what is it that's blocking your way of peace. So remember this, when you ask Allah for contentment in your heart, for healing, don't just sit there and wait for stars to fall in your lap. Allah has repeatedly Told in the Quran, that hearts find rest and peace in the Dhikr of Allah. Yes, you talk to Him, but the biggest physical form of His Dhikr is over there, lying in your shelf. The Quran. His Speech. Glory be to Him. Get up, and open your Mushaf, try reciting with all your heart, go look for the meaning of what you recited, then read it's Tafseer. And then thank Him because He alllowed you to learn something from His Book. Seek His forgiveness for your heedless behaviour towards His Book. Keep doing this as you ask Him to heal you, because in the Quran there is AshShifaa. Cure. The remedy to your bleeding heart, it's there in the Quran. So, seek it.

If you're asking for Eimaan, Taqwa or Tawakkul...do what pleases Him. Leave off desires for His sake. He will grant barakah in your goodness. Don't just ask Him, also show some efforts. Show Him you're trying.

This dunya is a test, you cannot sit in the test and think about answers in the mind...you'll have to lift up the pen and write them down. Mere asking to Allah and not working your part is like waiting for crops without sowing seeds, tending to plants and harvesting. Always remember, the world works by Allah's command, and Allah loves those who are people of cause and action. A Believer doesn't sit idle, he/she gives their 100% at whatever is in their might. In Sha Allah.

So, remember. Dua. Work. And Wait. With Sabr. :)

Zeenat Nazeer 🕊

#islamislove #muslim #quranandsunnah #duaa #just reflecting #tumblrpost #life lessons #workhard #musings

[09-05-02]

If you are anxious about your exams think about it as a process where you are aware about your progress. You are not that assignment which has come to an end. You are able to continue.

#quotes #studyblr #study motivation #student life #studying #text post #text #shitpost #argentina #just reflecting

[antheiantics]

Finishing the year with 10 things my parents taught me before I turned 20 (ESTJ mother, ISFJ father x ENTJ daughter edition)

Never go out with dirty shoes, you'll leave people with a bad impression of you even if they are strangers. (mother)

Never assume anything about anyone. Always do your research before reaching a conclusion. (father)

Always color coordinate when creating an outfit, no matter what (mother)

Don't slouch. (mother)

Never sign a document before reading the entirety of it. Read twice if you have to and always ask if you don't understand something. (father)

Turn in your assignments the day before the deadline or earlier if you can. (father)

If you ever start smoking, never do it before a meeting or a date. Men don't like kissing women who taste like ashtray. (father)

Don't buy a lot of cheap clothes. Buy one or two fashion items that are from a good brand and good quality. In general, always strive for quality not quantity. (mother)

Remember that wherever you go and whoever you go with, you must always have sufficient amount of money to call a cab that can get you home. Also, never drink on a first date. (mother)

Paying with card/phone is fine, but always have cash on you in case of emergency. (father)

Thank you, parents! We may not always see eye to eye but you have given me so much useful advices that I'll be sure to pass on to my children someday.

#mbti #mbti personality types #entj #intp #mbti conversations #mbti things #16 personalities #entp #intj #dark academia #isfj #estj #estj x isfj #parents #end of the year #just reflecting

[darrinjoakley]

1974

#hudsonvalley #newyork #poughkeepsie #city #street #gay #hudsonriver #reflection #reflective #just reflecting #storefront #window #anniversary #streetphotography

[jlepape]

Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan

#jlepape #monochrome #blackandwhite #bnw #photographers on tumblr #photooftheday #bw_lover #photography #raw community #original photographers #just reflecting

[thinkfeelwrite]

They would think she was....

If she let herself be who she really was then they would all think she was absolutely mad.

She loved music and loved even more to move to it. It was a struggle though as she could not move in synchrony with the music- she was all out of whack. She would close her eyes to try and ‘tap in’ but then she would stumble and have to stop. Sometimes though if she closed her eyes and really went deep within she never stumbled and she felt a flow of some great soothing empowering energy take her over. Then she could move and become the music…as it became her.

However that happened very rarely. She was always too zipped up. She would never do it if anyone was there.

She did once. She trusted her companions and everyone was having fun, pretending that the rug was a dance floor, in that big old student house in Lancaster.  

She started to move.  She felt like she could. She felt safe to do so. 

They laughed at her.  They were ashamed at doing so. They didn’t mean to humiliate her. They were her friends. She stopped and resolved never to let herself be seen in that way again.

That was over thirty years ago.

The friend that had guiltily laughed at her was now dead from cancer.

Everything can be so sad.

Did everyone feel this confusion, this detachment, this separateness, this darkness…

Was this just the human condition? Or were there some for whom the words confusion, detachment, separateness, darkness never existed?

What would that be like?

What Would that be like?!

What would she Do!?

She would probably not always wear a full face of makeup complete with primers, concealers, full coverage foundations and setting sprays.

She would let herself be seen as she truly was. 

She might not wear a bra! Outside, in public!

Actually probably best to always wear the bra.

She would open the front door without checking, improving and correcting her appearance first.

She would definitely eat whatever she felt like that day, instead of deliberating and calculating over how depressed she would feel after eating it. She would enjoy the olive oil poured on the warm salads. She wouldn't obsess over the ratio of pleasure to suffering with every mouthful. She wouldn’t feel the real dread at what the scales would reveal the next day. 

She wouldn't let a delicious meal ruin her day.

She would wear summer clothes in summer. The ones that were sleeveless. Maybe even shorts. She wouldn't wear her winter clothes in summer just because they covered over the evidence of her weakness around food. She wouldn't tell everyone that she was fine, not too hot at all.

She would eat bread.

She’d be open to people, she’d let them in. Instead of thinking that everyone was a potential source of hurt that would be wise to avoid. She'd stop being so selfish and self obsessed. She would smile at the world and not feel the  struggle and antagonism in it…at every breath.

She’d stop pressing the brakes all of the time ,on everything, in every area of her life.

It would be a sort of freedom.

She would be dizzy with it.

She would be like her dog, or cat. Just happy.

#spiritual growth #consciousness #spiritual #regret #emotional #struggle #anger #loss #thought #spirituality #spiritualgrowth #time to reflect #self reflecting #finding #focus #worth #matter #held #just reflecting #thinking #existence #growing up #life lessons #healing #grief #realization #the past #the pain #the angst #i just

[shecouldfade]

Heavy days, I process infinitely inside.

I absorb and absorb in silence until I feel nauseous.

I cried, I always want to cry.

it's enough an inflection of injustice, it's enough a compassionate self-awareness to set me off. I cry for everything that hinders me. I cry for the wickedness and for my obsessions. I can see them clearly, but I still don't know how to deal with them as I should.

I always feel too sensitive, so out of place.

I cry because it's good to do it, because no one teaches you that sometimes it's right to do it.

I've always hated those who say "come on don't cry", no instead no, you have to cry, goddamn.

I miss some things that didn't happen. A contact with something. I miss myself. And maybe as a good nihilist, defeatist, I will say that I won't be able to be me anymore, now.

Maybe I should stop ranting and get knocked up by a guy with an ugly tribal on his forearm. Resign myself to being protected by this toxic blanket of traditional family. I should throw away the years most full of awareness and desire to do in my life.

I've no hopes for the future, I don't have a concrete goal.

I just want to be quiet with my cat.

I feel like I'm going down and I'm pissed off because of my fear. Because of my indulgence.

All in search of the comfort zone, when the comfort zone is the death of life. And how long did it take me to make it so? Was it really my choice? How much time do we waste pretending we're okay?

Life is not what you have, but what you experience leaving it behind.

But by now we have burned the stages and the possibility of a future.

And now we fumble with the copy of the copy of the relational regression.

Now I've understood many things, but now it's late, I'm more and more tired and every day I enjoy it less.

And I feel time passing while I do the usual things cyclically and I don't feel like it anymore.

I envy you so much.

I just want to become invisible.

#me #black and white #darknees #onlyf@nz #just reflecting #depressing shit #self reflecting #mirror #writers on tumblr #female writers #writers and poets #writers corner

[raccoonfallsharder]

for all the subpar shit that the disney mcu has been churning out the last few years, it’s wild that my favorite movie and my favorite show of 2023 are both mcu properties

like disney is the broken clock that’s right twice a year but man when it is right it’s down to the millisecond

(i need these studios to start realizing that when you hire teams who really love the source material — who are basically fankids who can afford to devote all their time to their fanart/fiction — and give them creative freedom, you get high-quality shit. sony’s spiderverse is another great fucken example. flawless)

#just reflecting #gotg v3 #loki season 2

[harmonictechnicality]

Writing fics in Steve’s third person perspective is fascinating to me because of how Steve views his loved ones.

He spent almost two decades as a hollowed-out douchebag, but now he’s using all that carved open space in his heart to store all those meaningful relationships.

And even with Eddie being new to the group, he still finds room in his heart to welcome him. Makes a vip spot just for him because Steve is now an expert at inclusivity.

Like he has so much capacity inside himself to keep his friends safe and that’s a lovely and admirable thing to get to write about.

#steve harrington #steddie fic #just reflecting #steddie #eddie munson #he gives me strong Leo energy I can’t explain it #gotta be the protective babysitter thing

[xalygatorx]

Was adjusting some tags and realized Unbound is the longest thing I've ever written and I've been writing it for a month. :')

The only thing that compares is my second novel, which I also drafted in a month and landed at ~98k words.

Unbound is ~60k words longer than that already probably because I've enjoyed writing it and it's also in a serialized format I get chapter-by-chapter feedback with.

Writing novels in a silo is lonely and I've found it a lot easier to start resenting my own work that way. I still have stuff I want to write in that format, but I need to find a way to bridge this gap now that I know I can do it.

#personal #text #on writing #just reflecting #thank you for the support

[belog-grada-crna-princeza]

Words, words, words...

Sorry I'm not some kind of emotional exhibitionist. I don't show all my cards and even if I did, you wouldn't understand. I thought I was hiding but I don't hide. I am simply invisible to the naked eye, you see. I am confusing even to myself. According to you, I'm vague, abstract; you say I am passive, I let things happen to me. And it hurts because I find some truth in that, but also you don't know shit about me. I don't show my teeth to you because I don't want to give you the power to provoke that in me. And yet, in your eyes it makes me powerless. I had built a tower and locked myself there. They said I had become cold, distant, that I had to give people a chance, at least. So, I knocked down the bricks and as I stood there, defenseless, I realized: this isn't it either. This is no way to live. Maybe next time I'll build a lego house, so I can build it up and tear it down as needed. But I will always keep some things hidden, even in my art. What people can't touch, they can't taint. Don't let me be misunderstood as the song says, but then again, I like being wrongly perceived sometimes. You know nothing about me and I prefer to put up a mirror in your face. I'm of no concern to you, let's put it that way. I dream of someone who I will pull to this side of the glass. I dream of someone who will have the keys to the tower and who will realize why I love it here so much. It's not that I'm trying to keep the world out, as much as I'm trying to have something that is only mine in it. And maybe, I'll share it with someone some day. Or at least, a part of it. Until then, I'll stay cryptic. In a weird way, I like it that you're wrong about me. It soothes me, knowing you haven't trapped any part of me in your mind. Keep cutting your fingers with the glass. It's your reflection that you can't stand. It's always your reflection.

-Katarina

#beloggradacrnaprinceza #Words #Words words words #Reflection #Reflections #just reflecting #Mirror again #Cryptic #Abstract #Power #Control #I don't shove who I am in people's faces but it's NOT because I'm weak #It's because I don't WANT you to know who I actually am #You know nothing about me so stfu #And it will stay that way

[kkf]

During a rewatch of Buffy over the summer, it hit me that 2x01 is such an interesting take on PTSD. Throughout the episode, Buffy ticks so many symptom boxes.

Involuntary Flashbacks & Hypervigilance

Difficulty Trusting Others

Self Destructive Behavior

(I mean that, within the context of the show, Buffy dancing with Xander when she didn’t have stronger feelings for him sabotaged her friendships with Willow and Xander, as well as her romantic relationship with Angel - not that dancing with a person is in itself a destructive behavior, just to clarify)

Irritability

(When Cordelia calls you out on being unpleasant, you know it’s bad.)

The episode did a pretty good job challenging the social norms and stigmas around mental health that were still prevalent in the 90s. When Willow and Xander suggest her recent attitude change is the result of possession, a nice throw back to ancient times when mental health was understood to be caused by the supernatural.

It’s a conscious choice to have Giles, the show’s resident supernatural expert, be the one to suggest a more scientific reason for Buffy’s behavior.

Showing Giles, Willow, Xander and Angel watch as she wails away at the source of her trauma adds another layer of reality to the recovery process. So many family and friends of trauma survivors can feel helpless as they watch their person wrestled with their “inner demons.”

The end, however, is bittersweet for me. It’s the one place where I feel the show really reproduces and perpetuates the 90s mental health sensibilities. I love the last scene between Buffy, Willow, and Xander, where the latter two welcome back their friend.

That visual of Buffy’s support system still making space for her, saying “we’re here when you’re ready” is a powerful one. But it’s marred by the fact that the show ultimately never revisits this particular trauma nor does Buffy ever seek help from a mental health professional. Throughout the run of Buffy, there are a few occasions where therapists make an appearance. But after her first experience with actually dying, Buffy and company just continue on as though her mental health just “fixed” itself with one good crying jag.

Given the popularity of the show at the time, I have to ask how much societal good it could have done to have depicted its heroine getting treatment for her mental health. With the reach of Buffy the Vampire Slayer at the time, I think it could have made a serious dent in the stigmas surrounding not just those suffering from mental illnesses but the treatments for the illnesses themselves.

#Buffy #mental health #ptsd #just reflecting #btvs

[inconveniently-discorporated]

It's so bittersweet when you get back on medication and find that it actually works.

Especially if your medical journey doesn't look very pretty, and you've had medications stop working, and you've had to go on and off various kinds and sometimes the same ones over again.

It's so, so sweet when you just feel good. No brain fog, no headache, no pressure. Clarity of thought. Mental acuity, and physical function and energy to get things done.

There was a month once where I had the perfect morning routine I always wanted. I got out of bed with little resistance, I wrote, I was even dressed early enough to pick up coffee before work. Oh, that was so beautiful. It felt so good, and I was able to do it.

And therein lies the bitter taste of that kind of freedom.

I've now had enough experience before and after these brief moments of delightful capability, to definitively say fuck anybody that tries to say that things like ADHD and depression are "all in your head" and "all you need to do is try harder and focus".

It's not like I don't try. I'm so optimistic. More than that, I'm stubborn as fucking hell.

Yes -- my medication is giving me horrible side effects, or it stopped working as well, and now I have to change or go off them -- but I'm not going to let that stop me!! I'm NOT going to let it stop me, I'm going to pull out all of my cognitive tools and I'm going to fight like fucking hell to stay this way. I'm going to hold onto this feeling with a death grip and never let it go, I'm NOT going to let it stop me.

Yes -- I'm off my medication now and things are harder but I can do it, I really can. I can somehow find that spark that ignites the various receptors in my brain that allow me to do this. I'm not going to let it stop me, I'm not, I'm not god damn it.

Yes -- nothing is really working, most especially me right now, and I'm sitting here listening to music and staring blankly at my desktop because I've really hit a wall and I cannot will my hands to move, and even if I could, the thoughts are worming their way around my brain like it's a big clod of dirt. It's hard, but I can somehow make it through the muck. I shouldn't let it stop me. I can't let it stop me. I have too many things to do that I committed to when I was better, I have too many people depending on me and I don't want to let them down.

Yes -- I spent the last weekend in bed because I kept telling myself I was going to get up in five minutes, then ten minutes would pass and I wasn't ready, and by the time I got up I hadn't eaten all day so I was really exhausted. It's okay though, I've always got tomorrow, and tomorrow's going to be the day I get it back together because I won't let it stop me, I can't and I shouldn't and I'm not going to let it and I'm going to keep going. I've been failing everyone around me but I know what it's like to do better even though it's now more of a vague, abstract memory of when things were better.

Yes -- I don't actually really remember what it was like when things were better, and I can't really imagine what it's like to feel that way anymore. I question if that feeling was ever really real, and the only answer I have is: "I know it was real, I did feel that way at some point. That feeling is possible. It was possible before, I have to keep going knowing it's possible again. I can't give up, I won't."

And then you get back on something that works.

And then you wake up.

And then you realize that the thing you thought you were holding on so tightly to, isn't actually there anymore and hasn't been for a long time. You have no idea when it disappeared, only that at some point along the way it did.

I've never stopped fighting, but the fight itself changes along the way. I can fight as hard as I can, but when it comes to hitting punching bags versus hitting a wall, the results are going to be different.

And that's so disappointing. Especially when people treat it as a matter of motivation and discipline.

I can imagine a better day all I want, but at the end of the day, my brain is still a physical function of my physical body. I am so grateful for the times when the stars align and the medication works without significant side effects, but it's so disappointing to suddenly wake up one day with the feeling I've been fighting to have this entire time.

I feel good. I wish that felt better.

#adhd #depression #I really am okay #just reflecting

[thingsinlife990]

Something that’s missing in this society is to know how to carry yourself with glamour and elegance, having good manners and a great education. Tired of the basic outfits and thirsty pictures all over social media.

#just reflecting #girlblogging #level up #it girl #fashion #beauty #my standards are too high #self care #life #high maintenance #chic #love #glamoroussource #glam outfit #cat #birkin #amina muaddi #boujie #red #luxuries #educated #high value woman