#just scummy enough to fit in because he realized she was too good for him but you werent

[ystrike1]

Obscene Baguette - By Neutron (8/10)

This one is sweet and spicy. There's stalking, sex, and manipulative assholes around every corner here. It's an office romance, and without the yandere element it would be completely forgettable. The protagonist is just unique enough to keep you reading. I absolutely hate main characters that feel like self inserts, so the scummy and awkward sex crazed protagonist is a breath of fresh air.

Seul-ah is twenty seven years old. She's very picky because she's pretty, and she's had bad experiences with men before. Even she knows she's a little naive, but she has to keep her guard up. Back in university she found the perfect handsome, rich boyfriend. That didn't work out because he had a tiny dick! Seul-ah has been extra careful ever since. Basically, she doesn't want to date a man unless she's sexually compatible with him. Unfortunately, she's still a virgin with high expectations. She doesn't know how to be in a relationship.

Her life at the office seems pretty darn dull, but she's not unhappy. She just wants to date and marry well, then her life will be perfect. Her obsession with finding a big dick is troublesome though. She knows she won't find a good guy if she blatantly starts talking about cock sizes on the first date.

Moojin is her co-worker. He's too perfect, just like her university boyfriend. She doesn't trust him, so she rejects him. Moojin confesses to her on a sunny day. She knows he's honest, handsome and smart but she sends him away. Flawless people are always disappointing on the inside. That is her experience. She's naive, horny, and presumptuous. If her co-workers knew her true self they would think she's a total asshole, but she's pretty so nobody knows about her scummy side.

She gets drunk at a work event. Moojin catches her when she falls, and she accidentally touches his dick. It's huge. She apologizes and runs away. The next morning she suddenly regrets everything. She wishes she didn't reject him. When she asks him out to dinner in a pretty dress he says no, so she thinks she missed her chance.

She did not miss her chance. Rumors about Moojin are spreading at work. Good rumors. He's rich. He's the CEO's nephew. Seul-ah freaks out. She thinks he rejected her because she's a snob after his money. That's what the situation looks like after all. She asked him out right after the rumor started.

Moojin doesn't care. He confirmed that the rumor is true because he wanted to entice her. If she likes his money that's fine. If she likes his face that's fine. If she likes his dick fine. He just wants her. She's weak to his passionate words, so she doesn't realize how weird the situation is. Most men wouldn't want to date a gold digger, but Moojin doesn't care about that. He's willing to use anything to lure Seul-ah in. When he thinks she went on a blind date he cries and tells her to choose him instead.

Her ex comes back into her life. He's a creep that loves pretty virgins. He thinks Seul-ah couldn't forget about him, because she isn't married yet. She rejects him politely more than once, but his harassment escalates. He thinks she's playing hard to get. He grabs her arm and she runs away with bruises. He immediately calls his friend and tries to but date rape drugs. He's tired of waiting for Seul-ah to settle for him.

Moojin appears out of nowhere. He was watching. He beats up the creeper, and he covers up the beating with cash and threats. Moojin doesn't want Seul-ah to see his dark side. She doesn't know he's her stalker, and he's willing to pay to keep that a secret. Moojin had a miserable childhood. Seul-ah's happy go lucky attitude brightened up his life. He can't wait to marry her.

I think the sex in this is above average. Seul-ah fails multiple times. She wants a big dick but it doesn't magically fit in. Moojin and Seul-ah have to work on their sexual compatibility together. If he wasn't a yandere this would be a very sweet, stereotypical story. I like Seul-ah because she's a little different, and Moojin is a very sweet yandere.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #webtoon #Obscene Baguette

[mammonshuman92]

- It Takes Two - Pt. 2

(Mammon x Gn!MC)

Genre: angst to fluff (the fluff is coming I promise lol)

Warnings: cheating, not proof read , if i missed any TW’s I apologize

“We’re a little busy right now.” A familiar voice, biting and arrogant, came from his lap. His eyes widened, whipping his head around to look at you in his lap. Except it wasn’t you. It was her. His heartbeat accelerated as panic began to set in.

“No, no, no, no, no.” He chanted, standing up in an instant, causing the succubus to fall to the floor with a thud and a few profanities. As events began to unfold and the puzzle pieces started fitting together; when it was already too late, he realized what he’d done. A hard lump instantaneously forming in his throat. He turned to you, eyes wide with terror, hands on either side of his head tangling in his hair.

“MC..I..I-It’s not wh- I thought-” He choked out.

He followed your line of sight, which was glued to his undone pants and obvious arousal. With shaky hands and fingers unwilling to cooperate, he fumbled with his zipper, struggling to get it up. Arms from behind snaked around his middle, gently clawing at his chest. 

“Shall we finish what we started?” She hummed seductively, staring daggers directly at you.

You shook your head, a sob escaping your lips as a fresh wave of tears streamed down your cheeks. You brushed past Asmo, disappearing out the doorway.

What’s goin’ on..? ...This can’t be happenin’..

He shoved the girl’s arms off of him without saying a word, a scowl spreading across her face. He made a beeline for the door, Asmo quickly stepping in front of him to block his way. “Don’t. You’ve done enough..” With venom lacing his tone, he looked the succubus up and down. He turned his glare on his brother for just a moment, the utter disgust they held was evident, before running out the door after you. As his figure disappeared, Mammon could feel the reality, the weight of the situation setting in.

His heart was pounding against his ribcage, breathing becoming erratic. The lump in his throat was unwavering, choking him as tears streamed down his cheeks. The gravity of it all bringing him to his knees.

“How moving.” The voice behind him scoffed, reminding him of her presence, “It almost seems like you love them.”

His head whipped around to see her, lounging casually on the sofa as if nothing had happened.

“You.” He growled, harshly wiping his face with the back of his hand as he stood up.

 “Stay the fuck away from me!” He snarled.

She laughed lightly as she stood from the couch, crossing the floor until she was right in front of him. “Don’t be like that. Ten minutes ago you were ready to nail me on that couch.” She purred, her finger trailing down his chest, quickly moving lower. Like a flash, he grabbed her wrists and held her hands up in the air in front of her.

“Let me make one thing very clear to you right now. I don’t want ya. I only made out with you and shit because I thought ya were MC. I would never willingly do anything to hurt them.” He glared at her, making sure she caught that emphasis, before dropping her hands. “Your jealousy bullshit, and making moves on me while I’m drunk just made me lose the one thing that has ever been good about me..” He trailed off, releasing his grip in her.

She rolled her eyes, “Why are you getting so worked up over a human? There’s nothing special about-”

“Excuse me?” He growled. 

Mammon has always been the level-headed one when it comes to altercations, believe it or not. He never usually lets his anger get the best of him. After thousands of years of being the scummy brother, the thief, the loser, he got used to just letting people’s words fall upon deaf ears, so to say. But, that was not the case this time. You see, anyone could say whatever they wanted to about him, he didn’t care. He could handle whatever was thrown at him. 

You, on the other hand? Well, you’re flawless. In every miniscule way, you were perfect. That’s not saying that you don’t make mistakes, or drive him crazy sometimes, but to him there was absolutely not a thing about you he would change. Everything you did, everything you were, was absolutely immaculate.

Rage bubbled in his gut.

Leaning in closely, he towered over her, radiating ire. “I’m not gonna sit here and discuss why you’re wrong, seein’ as how it’d take all day, but what I am gonna to say is for a lesser demon, ya might wanna reconsider who you’re talking to. He spat, “Say one more thing about MC, and it’ll be the last time ya speak..” He whispered, glaring at her for a moment before taking a step back.

“Stay away from me and MC.” He warned once more, daggers in his eyes as he turned and bolted through the door.

If he had any shred of hope left, it was that you would talk to him and let him explain everything. He knew it was shitty, after everything that just went down, to even consider the possibility of you forgiving him, but he held onto that little shred of hope. Had he been in the right state of mind, had she not taken advantage of the situation and the state he was in, he would’ve never even stayed in the same room with that girl, much less go as far as he had.

He felt awful. Whether he was so drunk he was convinced it was you on his lap or not, he felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. After seeing the horror, the heartbreak on your face; the tears that stained your cheeks because of something he’d done, he kinda didn’t want you to forgive him. He didn’t want to lose you, couldn’t imagine continuing on without you in his life, by his side. But if you hated him now, he wouldn’t blame you. He deserved it. And he would live with it for the rest of his existence, knowing that he messed up his only chance at true happiness; at spending his life with his soulmate.

-

You bobbed and weaved as quickly as you could through the crowd of club patrons, needing to get far away from here as fast as you could, as your impending breakdown was sure to be a sight to see.

You were already so out of it; physically present but mentally, your brain had already shut off. Not quite sure how to handle the current situation. All the faces in the club were just a blur; you could feel the bass of the music reverberating inside your chest, but you couldn’t hear anything. Kind of like when you’re somewhere so quiet, the absence of sound feels so heavy, deafening.

You had to get out of here. Heart hammering wildly, you felt as if you couldn’t breathe; like the walls were closing in on you. A panic attack was setting in. Finally free of the sea of people, you darted out the front door of the establishment, running as fast as your legs would take you back to the House of Lamentation. Hoping that no one else would be home to see you; becoming witness to your unraveling.

-

*bing*

*bing, bing* *bing*

Your D.D.D. continued going off with near constant notifications well into the night. You could’ve just put it on silent, but you just couldn’t seem to move, frozen by heartbreak. Apparently several pictures were going viral on Devilgram, leaking this rumor and that regarding the second born and the succubus. Further making you look and feel like a complete fool.

Mammon had also been blowing up your phone since you made it back to the HOL. He had even come by your room in an attempt to talk to you but once he realized the door was locked, which had never happened the entire time you’ve lived here, he sat outside the door begging you to open it as loud sobs escaped him. As much as you wanted to, you didn’t budge.

Of course you still love him. How could you not? Hearing his desperate pleas and heartbroken sobs was almost too much for you. Although you were the one who had been betrayed, you wanted nothing more than to fling the door open, latch yourself onto him and never let go. But you couldn’t. Cheating is a dealbreaker. It’d happened before, in previous relationships, but shit this one hurt so bad, worse than any other heartbreak you’d had.

He had his faults, much like everyone, but he was so perfect for you, and treated you like you’d always dreamed. This couldn’t really be the end could it? Over, just like that? Completely smitten and in love two days ago, to heartbroken, crying on the bathroom floor. 

How are you supposed to move on from this? He’s your best friend. Or, was. How are you supposed to pass him in the hall, or eat dinner, or have House movie nights in the common room? How are you supposed to act like you're not still in love with him..?

-

The next week was pretty rough, to say the least.

You stayed locked away in your room when you weren’t at RAD; replaying the moment you saw them together, crying until the tears no longer fell; effectively torturing yourself. They’d all come knocking at your door countless times, trying their best to make you feel better. And while you appreciated it wholly, it didn’t help.

Avoiding Mammon was probably one of the hardest things you’d ever done, seeing as how you kinda live together. While it was extremely hard not to just run up to him and latch onto him like you always did, it seemed harder to just avoid him in general. 

During the first few days, he left small presents outside your door, had a couple of his brothers slip you notes, and waited for you after class a few times. After using every ounce of your willpower to avoid him, he left you alone. He still messaged you several times a day though, apologizing profusely, begging you to talk to him.

But, it was better this way right? Like ripping off a band-aid? 

That’s what you’d always heard anyway. Instead of asking questions and demanding answers as to why someone else chose to hurt you, you just cut it off right there, ghosting them; removing yourself completely from their life. Because if they truly cared, really loved you, they wouldn’t make the conscious decision to do something that they know would hurt you, that stepped outside the boundaries of your relationship. Their reasoning doesn’t matter. Aside from living in the same house and attending the same school, you had pretty much ghosted him.

In public anyway. In the privacy of your room, where you could feel everything to its fullest, you’d spend hours going through pictures, skimming Devilgram for any new gossip about the two of them. Re-reading your old text messages, finger hovering over the send button of the text you’d typed out a hundred times before deleting it and tossing your phone, a new wave of tears pricking your eyes.

-

Unable to sleep, he’d tossed and turned in his bed so much that his body ached and one of the corners of his sheet had popped off the bed. With a heavy sigh, he rolled over and grabbed his D.D.D. off the nightstand. Squinting his eyes harshly when he unlocked the phone.

“3:41am” He groaned, tossing the phone back onto the nightstand. He turned back over, facing the empty side of his bed. Sure, he didn’t often share it before you, but once you started sleeping together, he wasn’t sure how he’d ever slept before you came along. It just felt right. Your body molded against his, sleeping peacefully in his arms.

His hand trailed down the cold, empty sheets; the slight disruption releasing your smell. A hard lump formed in his throat as tears pooled behind his lash line. He sat up quickly, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms. With a heavy sigh, he stood up and grabbed a pair of pajama pants, making his way to the door. If he had any hope of being able to fall asleep again, he’d need some help drowning his thoughts.

He quietly made his way to the kitchen, fully intending to turn up the bottle of Demonus Lucifer kept hidden in the dark recesses of the pantry. As soon as he stepped foot in the kitchen, he froze.

It had only been seven days, but it felt like a lifetime. Seven days without being in the same room as you for more than just a moment before you ran in any direction as long as it was away from him. Not that he could blame you. He wanted to run away from himself..

Which is exactly what he was determined to do with Demonus, had he not stumbled upon you sitting with your back to the fridge, crying into a half eaten container of chocolate frosting. 

Immediately alerted to the figure in the doorway, you jumped up, attempting to wipe at your face as you muttered an apology, but paled when you saw who it was that disturbed you. You slowly sat the container on the counter, keeping your eyes fixed on the man in the doorway.

What was left of his heart, shattered at the sight of you. Your eyes were puffy and red with dark bags underneath them. The same eyes that looked at him with such deep burning love, were now dull and lifeless as you stared at him. You were visibly broken, anyone could see that. He was the reason you looked like this; like an abandoned puppy, beaten and abused. He hated it. Hated himself.

He moved out of the doorway and into the kitchen, freeing up the only way out in case you wanted to run. Not that he blamed you. If he could run from himself right now, he would.

But, now you were in the same room together for the first time in a week and he didn’t want to waste the opportunity. Maybe if he just started talking you would listen, even just a tiny bit to what he had to say.

“MC, I-”

“Don’t.” Your voice trembled slightly as your eyes began to sting.

“Please, just hear me-”

“And what are you going to say, hm? That you’re sorry? Sorry you did it, or sorry you got caught?” You hissed with tears in your eyes. Mammon slightly recoiled from the tone of your voice, a tone he’d never heard from you. You hated being this way; angry and bitter, wanting him to hurt like you did. It was surely petty, but you didn’t care.

“MC, listen, I swear I didn’t do anythin’, okay? I was still goin’ strong from an all night drinkin’ binge, an-and she just showed up in the VIP lounge. I told her to fuck off but she didn’t listen. I was already pretty out of it when things started happenin’ and I thought it was you. I thought it was you the whole time! I-I didn’t know it was her till I heard you and Asmo and realized what happened! She took advantage of the situation, of me bein’ way too drunk..” He was talking so fast, trying to get out the words he’d been wanting to say to you. 

Narrowing your eyes, you stared at him suspiciously.

What if he really didn’t do it on purpose..? If all of that is true, it would explain why he looks so rough..

Having barely stayed in the same room as one another for several days and not wanting to look at him, wanting to remain strong and now cry in front of everyone, you hadn’t noticed but how awful he looked as well. He clearly hasn’t been sleeping well, judging by the giant bags under his eyes. Not to mention that he is also currently awake at 4am, looking just as much like shit as you did.

“Then why is it all over Devilgram that it’s been an ongoing fling?” You questioned, a few tears escaping.

“I would never do anythin’ like that, MC! She’s just jealous or somethin’, I don’t know what her issue is.. But, I-I love ya, more than anythin’ in the three realms. Even Goldie!”

You could feel yourself caving in with every word he said. It made sense, judging by how she’d randomly confronted you after school that day after whispering about you with her friends all day, it seemed like jealousy could be plausible. But what proof did you have? It was his word against what you saw with your own eyes. Not to mention everything on Devilgram.

“Funny, from where I was standing, it sure looked like I was the last thing on your mind.” You hissed, causing him to flinch; but he wasn’t backing down yet.

“Just let me prove it to ya, okay? I-I’ll do whatever I gotta do. Please, MC?” His deep, sapphire blue eyes bore deep into yours; the sorrow, the agony they held was immense. The crack in your armour deepened.

He could see that you were wavering, but that you were hesitant, scared to believe him; to trust him. He couldn’t blame you. If he were on the other side of all this, he wouldn’t believe his words either. He didn’t expect you to just hear him out then jump into his arms and ride away into the sunset. He knew better. He knew he’d have to prove it. He was more than willing to do whatever it would take for you to trust him again, to believe that he’d never hurt you intentionally.

He took a step toward you, careful and anxious, as if you would bolt if he moved too suddenly. He reached out for your hand slowly, reluctant at first but upon realizing how much you’d missed his touch as his warm, much larger hand enveloped yours, you caved so easily.

He squeezed your hand lightly, looking down at your entwined fingers, gently rubbing the side of your thumb. You felt something wet hit your hand a couple times, realizing quickly that they were tears, you attempted to swallow the lump in your throat that was quickly forming.

“Please? I’m miserable without ya..” He asked, voice cracking slightly.

Even after everything that’s happened the last week, you couldn’t stand to see him in such pain; miserable and broken. Just like you.

Sure, he was always stand-offish about his feelings and the like before you got together, but once it was all official, that was it; the walls came down. There had never been a single time that he lied to you or went behind your back with anything. He lasted exactly twelve minutes after buying your birthday present before he couldn’t take it anymore and spilled the beans. 

He’s always a goofball, sometimes has bad timing and isn’t always the best with words, but he’s never given you a reason not to trust him before; he’s never been anything but an amazing boyfriend that genuinely tries his hardest to make you happy.

“One.” You whispered, barely audible. His head snapped up, deep blue eyes scanning yours. You closed your eyes, taking a deep, yet shaky breath.

“One chance. That’s it.”

No sooner than the words left your lips, Mammon was pulling you flush to his chest in a bone crushing hug. Had you not been utterly craving his touch, to be held by him, you would’ve pushed him away. That’s what you told yourself anyway.

“I won’t make ya regret it, MC.” He earnestly swore, squeezing you gently.

For the sake of your heart, you hoped he was right.

~ taglist ~

@ithinkimdekubutreallyimdenki

@maybe-nott

@bandaged-despair

@bokuto7stan

@aliackerman

- part three coming soon -

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me mammon #mammon x mc #mammon x reader #mammon x you #mammon x gn!mc #gender neutral #gn #gender neutral mc #obey me angst #mammon angst #trigger warning #cheating

[sscoutregimentss]

could you please do L, U, V, Y and Z for Armin Arlert Please Queen, i just passed by and i already love ur your account💕💕

i teared up a bit at how nice this ask is (´•ω•̥`) i wrote this in modern au again oopsy daisy

edit: added a read more bc this post is kinda long

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Armin is not terrible with kids, but no where near great. Growing up with no parents and having his grandfather die at such a young age led him to grow up fast, so he can't really relate to kids and what they... do.

Like he will see a baby and just talk normally to it. After doing some reading on why baby talk is important, he makes an effort to babble more to them but he really struggles. Or when he's with Gabi and Falco he asks them about quantum physics and Gabi is just like "uhhh I like fortnite."

He really tries. And it's not like he dislikes being around them, he just struggles, and kids don't really like him much either.

Also he cannot stand IPad kids. He blames it more on the parents then on the kids, because they're just kids, but one of his biggest peeves is crying, whiny children with snot on their bright blue silicone cases, eyes glued to a screen instead of dealing with the world. Since he is Armin, he's still polite and gentle with them, but the minute you're out of earshot he's complaining about it for a good 30 minutes.

In terms of his own children, he's actually a really good parent. He did a lot of research on how to raise kids well and he does his best to make sure his kids get what he couldn't in terms of upbringing. He's some what distant? Like his kids aren't ranting and raving about their new crush to their dad, but there's a really good bond between them and they go to him whenever he needs anything.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Armin is prone to telling a little white lie to get what he wants.

In general, he's subtly manipulative. Not in like an abusive or generally scummy way, but in a... human way. We all use manipulation to get what we want, in the end. Like puppy dog eyes or pouting.

He's always transparent about what he's doing, and it's not like he's causing any harm to you. In fact, most of the time its for your own good. Like if you're feeling a bit self conscious, he'll pretend not to notice until you manage to work up the nerve to think better of yourself, stuff like that. Or if something is bothering you, he'll figure out a way for you to bring it up instead of him so you get better at communication. He'll come clean after his little rouses work, but sometimes you wish he'd just tell you what he was doing as he was doing it.

He also takes a while to even consider you a priority. Even though his whole thing is taking your relationship slowly, you're quick to find out that he may call you his partner, but you're under school work, work, family and friends in the "Armin's Important Stuff" scale. He's not an easy shell to crack, so it's kind of expected, but unless you confront him, he will not even realize that he's doing wrong.

Chronic nail biter. Even when he's not nervous.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

On a scale of "beauty guru" to "horrendously stinky" he's a "I care for aesthetics."

He's got a very distinct dark/light academia (depends on his mood) aesthetic that he must keep up. His clothes are always ironed, never tattered, and though most of it is second hand he looks very put together and sometimes even expensive.

But in terms of beauty, it's not his priority at all. He likes the way he dresses because it makes him feel like he's ready to take on the day, and he showers everyday for obvious reasons, but he doesn't wear makeup, and his skincare routine is just washing his face and sunscreen.

Speaking of skincare, he has effortlessly flawless skin and hair. So smooth, so silky, and he barely puts in effort other than the basics. You're convinced it's because he's blessed by the gods, but he says its because he gets enough sleep every night.

His hair grows back super fast, so he has Mikasa cut it since he can't afford to go to the hair dresser so often. He liked the long hair as a kid, but now he finds it annoying, so he keeps it neatly cropped. She's a good hairstylist.

He's also... surprisingly ripped. He looks super skinny but he's got abs for days. Unlike most of his friends, only works out for mental clarity, and not muscles or gaining strength, so he's not like huge and bulky but he's pretty fit.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He doesn't like overly judgmental people. It's only natural for people to assume things, but people who dedicate their free time to just assuming things about people annoys him to no end. Like people who assume the worst out of him because he hangs out with Eren, or people who think that he's some single virgin loser because he gets good grades.

Also, playing into Armin our semi-pretentious angel trope, he prefers a well read partner. Someone who he can make references too or will take his recommendations of classic literature, or maybe even watch ocean documentaries with him. They don't have to like every last thing he likes, and if they just haven't been exposed to things he won't mind at all, they just have to be open minded and not write off things he enjoys as "nerdy shit."

Piggy backing off that, he wants someone who somewhat cares about their academics. They don't have to be the next Einstein, or a straight A wonderchild like him, but rich brats who's parents are paying for their schooling just for them to party annoys him. It's not fair that he has to work so hard to keep his scholarships and other students are working hard to pay their tuition just for people to come because their Mommy and Daddy said so.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Armin falls asleep at 11 pm and wakes up at 7 am, without fail. It's amazing. You question if he's even a college student.

He uses an old fashioned alarm clock that's at the opposite side of his bed, but sometimes he wakes up on his own and forgets to turn it off, making him run out of the shower to stop the ringing before his roommates wake up.

Before you two started dating, he just slept on his side. But once you two got close, he can't sleep without hugging something if you're not spending the night.

When you do spend the night, he likes being little spoon, or facing you and having you nuzzled in his chest (or vice versa, he's not picky).

He's quite a neat cuddler. No limbs haphazardly thrown over you or anything. His legs are very gently intertwined with yours, he has his arms in a very specific spot to make sure you're comfortable, and he doesn't snore or anything.

Sometimes he sleep talks. Very rarely, though, but when you catch it, it is the funniest thing ever. He has really wild dreams for such a down-to-earth person— you caught him babbling about turning into a 150 meter skinless giant once. Weird.

#more non eren posts... weve come so far #aot imagines #aot x y/n #aot x you #aot x reader #character: armin #type: headcanons #sfw alphabet #snk x you #snk x reader #snk fluff #snk x y/n #armin arlet x you #armin arlert x you #armin arlet x y/n #armin arlert x y/n #armin arlet x reader #armin arlert x reader #armin x you #armin x y/n #armin x reader #these characters are the worst to tag because nobody knows how to spell their names #au: university #au: modern #sscoutregimentss sfw alphabet: armin

[lettersfromn0where]

My Steambaby Headcanons (a Semi-Condensed Version)

I am almost absurdly passionate about my zutara headcanons, and after literal months spent thinking about them constantly, I have so many that one could fill volumes with them. I won’t bother y’all with that, BUT I want to put my steambaby OCs out there because I adore them and want to scream about them more. So. Here we go. [note: these were created for my The Waiting Game AU, but you don’t need any context to get it except that an Aang/Oc ship is Kind Of Important.]

Okay, so first up we have Crown Princess Izumi, the oldest of my steamchildren. Izumi is the classic Fire Nation princess: she’s a smart, studious firebender who resembles Zuko more than any of her other siblings (though she does have Katara’s chin). She can be a bit cold, but she’s fiercely loyal to her loved ones and, when given the chance to be, is quite the hopeless romantic as well. Of her siblings, she’s closest to her next-oldest sister, Kya, and her youngest sister Sana; her favorite non-parental Gaang member is definitely Aang; and outside of the family, she is very close to twin classmates named Kaoru and Asaka, the children of a noble family who attended her primary school and remained lifelong friends. (She’s briefly engaged to Kaoru, though it doesn’t last for Reasons.) she eventually marries Hideo, the generic but sweet son of a government official, and they have two sons, Iroh II and Kenji.

Then we’ve got Kya, the second-born Princess, who’s just about a year younger than her older sister. A waterbender and by far the most gifted combat bender of her siblings, Kya is a bit of a problem child. As a middle child, a backup heir, and a waterbender in the Fire Nation (who also looks far more SWT than most of her siblings - she’s very similar to Katara in appearance), she has a lot of trouble fitting in, and will often play on her penchant for troublemaking to get attention. She’s also very athletic and a talented waterbender, a skill she’s worked tirelessly to develop. But she’s also fiercely loving and committed to making the decisions she believes to be right. Case in point: when the Earth Queen insists that her younger son, Prince Hyun, marry one of the FN heirs as part of the settlement of a post-war border conflict, Kya offers to marry him in order to secure the peace deal. As Hyun (Hyun, you sweet dumb kpop idol lookalike himbo bby boy, I love you) is nothing like his conniving mother, their initially-acrimonious relationship doesn’t take long to turn into a genuine love match, perhaps the happiest of the steambaby marriages. They have four children - Xinyi, Jangmi, Shiori, and Atuat - and are wildly popular with the public. Stan Hyunya for clear skin.

And now we come to Ryuji, our only boy and perhaps my favorite steambaby. Though he’s a waterbender, Ryuji is just about an even blend of his parents in appearance, and resembles neither of them in temperament. Where his parents are both outspoken and somewhat hot-tempered, he’s very soft-spoken and shy, preferring the company of very few people - his mother, his youngest sister Sana, and his best friend Yuna (Aang/Hina [OC] kid - any Haang fans out there?), namely. He’s the soft, bookish mama’s boy of my dreams pls shut up I am Projecting. Anyways. Ryuji also has a bit of middle child frustration, and he’s the only steambaby to go away to school (Ba Sing Se University, where he studies medicine - he and Yuna attend together bc they are literally inseparable) because he feels rather useless back at home, as the third-born heir. He also later shocks the family and the Fire Nation by choosing to elope with Yuna, with whom he has naturally fallen madly in love, despite his family’s protests because as the second-to-last airbender, Yuna has a bit of a conflict of interest with his...princiness. Naturally, they realize that this is stupid and come around, and though Yuna and Ryuji still don’t see the family as much as they manage Air Temple Island (and Yuna is a Republic City Council member), they manage to smooth things over. They have three children - two daughters (Dolma and Yangchen, both airbenders) and a son (Sora, a firebender, and the next in a long line of FN mama’s boys).

Next is Sakari, the only nonbender in the family. She’s so much like Sokka that it’s somewhat frightening, though she looks a lot like both of her parents - she’s very sharp and quick-witted (she’s 100% the funny one in this family), a talented nonbending combatant (thank Hina for that one), and a perpetual disaster. She’s very unlucky in love, as you’ll know if you’ve read Give The Game Away, and her closest relationships are with Haang daughter #2, aka Yangchen (yes, Yangchen is also a Yunuji kid - there are two, though I can’t say why because GTGA spoilers) and her younger sister, Sana. She has a tragically doomed crush on Yangchen for most of her adolescence and eventually serves in her sister’s cabinet in some capacity which idk yet but it has to be something bc she’s way too smart to do nothing.

Then finally we have Sana, the baby of the family. Sana, another firebender, is definitely the pretty one (well, they’re all pretty, but she’s especially stunning) - she essentially looks like Katara with Zuko’s eyes, and she has a LOT of admirers. She’s exuberant, outgoing, and incredibly sweet; there’s nothing she loves more than a good party, which absolutely baffles her mostly-introverted older siblings. Not a particularly talented firebender, but no one cares because she’s good enough to be super warm all the time and therefore very cuddly. (She is everyone’s favorite one to cuddle.) As a young adult, she’s diagnosed with what’s heavily implied to be an autoimmune disease, and her health is relatively fragile from then on out - it’s also thought that she’ll be unable to have children because of this, which causes her to break off a relationship with her childhood sweetheart, Haang Kid #3 aka Gyatso. (The reasons involve air nomad genes and it’s all very complex and there’s definitely NOT a 7k word oneshot about it. Nope.) however, after an absolutely disastrous first marriage to a scum-of-the-earth type, she finds her way back to Gyatso, and - improbably - they later have a surprise baby, a daughter named Kumiko. She spends most of her time out in the country, as the prying eyes at the palace are too much for her after what she went through with Scummy First Husband, and is a surprisingly happy country bumpkin with Gyatso (though she can definitely still work a room).

Why every freakin’ steambaby falls in love with a Haang kid, idk. Figures. I’m not creative. Will this make any sense if you didn’t read TWG? Unsure. But this has been fun ig?

#zutara #headcanon #steambabies #Izumi (TWG) #Kya (TWG) #Ryuji (TWG) #Sakari (TWG) #Sana (TWG) #Guys I just care them so so much

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

Lethobenthos || Mike Hanlon x Reader

⊳ Ch. 2: The Butcher's Daughter⊲

A/n: on the off chance that y'all know about butcher shops and meat or whatever, im so sorry cause even though i did a bunch of research, I know it's still pretty inaccurate so please don't come for me 😂 EDIT: I am crying cause I have 950 followers 🥺🥺🥺 I love each and every one of you guys, thank you so much babes 💞

Warnings: Alv*n Marsh being Alv*n Marsh. He briefly leers at reader. There's no comment, but it still needs a warning i feel. Also, long ass chapter. I truly don't know how to write short chapters, yall. Brief mention of animal death (natural causes) and signs of a PTSD attack. Marker for PTSD attack will be labeled [●●●]. Safe reading loves

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

- 𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝟏𝟗𝟖𝟗 -

    ℕ𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕝𝕖𝕕 𝕚𝕟 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕥 of Costello Avenue Market, sandwiched between Terry's Barber Shop and one of the finer footwear retailers in town, was Derry's very own, Quality Meats. A quaint little shop - as quaint as butcher shops come, that is - right smack in the middle of the street, just across the road from the Capitol Theater. It was always a treat for Y/n L/n when the annual fourth of July parade was in full swing, she always had the best seat in the house from her bedroom window. It sat just above the shop, and truly had the best view overlooking the street. But the parade was weeks away, and it couldn't come soon enough.

    For now, she was stuck in her daily routine at her father's butchery. Every morning it was her job to prep the shop before it opened, check the stock, and assure that everything was in order. Her father oversaw the shop but most of his time was devoted to preparing and tending to the meat in the back. This also left the task of receiving, inspecting, and storing meat upon delivery to her.

    Her favorite part of the week. Because it meant seeing her favorite person, Mike Hanlon. He was the delivery boy who supplied some of their best selections, straight from the famous Hanlon Homestead. But this was not what thrilled her, what thrilled her was the company of the thoughtful boy. They had met the previous year when her father had hired him for deliveries, Mike had just taken up work at his grandparent's farm and the two quickly hit it off.

    Mike was her saving grace. She never had the stomach for her father's work, and despite their weekly heated arguments on the matter, she'd get stuck with the tasks. At the very least, he didn't force her to work in the back in the meat locker. Not anymore. He had learned that lesson the hard way when he dragged her in despite her kicking and squirming - he figured she was just being dramatic, throwing a fit. But low and behold, it all ended with him clearing out the locker for sterilization when she got sick.

    Now the only times she ever stepped foot inside was to get to the back door, which is something she didn't do - something she couldn't do - without plugging her nose and blocking out her peripheral vision as she slipped through the back door to greet her best friend.

    An occasion, she feared, that she faced as she glanced impatiently at the clock on the wall for the fourth time on this hot June day. Mike was usually pulling up outside the store by now, hell, she clocked out at four to spend time with Mike and it was already three forty-five. Well, three forty-eight according to the shop's clock which one could always rely to be just three minutes fast no matter how much you reset it.

    From her spot behind the counter, she had a limited view of the sidewalk outside. A variety of people passed, but none of them were Mike, the person she most wanted to see. And it certainly didn't help that a crowd of people were bunching up near the door, blocking her view of the window.

    Three sharp notes from the counters bell broke her from her trance, throwing her harshly back to reality. A rather intimidating man stood on the other side of the counter, he was quite tall and everything about him put Y/n on edge.

    "Sorry sir," Y/n mumbled, not feeling very sorry at all. "How can I help you, today?"

    The man seemed to rethink his anger, though she would have preferred it over the new look on his leathery face. A wry smile stretched his lips and Y/n did not fail to notice his wandering gaze, only proving her first impressions to be correct. She felt her skin crawl and she did not fight the disgusted look cementing on her face.

    "Just don't let it happen again, sweetheart. Now listen up, I'm in a hurry," Christ, she thought, even his voice is unnerving. "I need a pound and a half of the ground round beef."

    "Right away, sir," she says, through gritted teeth. "One moment,"

    Y/n hated when people ordered when her father was in the back, even though it happened often. Not just because she despised such tasks as grinding the meat and preparing it, but talking to the customers was never a favorite of hers. This was a fine example why.

    Instead, she slipped into the back where they kept their stock that wasn't on display and began preparing the meat with a wrinkled nose.

    "Fucking creep," she mumbled.

    She wished she could say this was the first time something like this had happened, but unfortunately, Derry was filled with scummy people. Something did seem familiar about him though, she might have seen him here before. It'd make sense, Quality Meats was the only butchers around for miles.

    Deciding she didn't want to dwell on it any longer, her mind began to wander. Anything that wasn't the man waiting out front really, thankfully that was easy enough. Hopefully, the rest of her workday would go by much quicker so she could meet with Mike. He said he had a surprise for her, and she had been wondering about it all day. The very thought fills her stomach with butterflies. Well, Mike did that all on his own, anyway. He always brought out that side of her. A bubbly, giddy side of her that always seemed to lose any sense of time around him.

    Just ten more minutes, she thought. Just power through.

    With the order all prepared, she returns to the front counter to find the man leaning against the counter in boredom. Great, now I have to redo the counters, too. When he spotted her, he straightened up and gave her a disapproving once over.

    "What took you so long? I'm in a hurry. Fixing your hair couldn't wait, or something?"

    Oh, a sexist fucking creep, she mentally corrected herself.

    A snarl curled its way onto her face, but before she could make a bitter remark her dad's voice boomed across the shop.

    "Well, if it ain't Alvin Marsh," The man in question moved his attention to Y/n's father, and remarkably enough, a somewhat friendly smile appeared on his face. "Good to see ya,"

    "You too, always a pleasure,"

    Y/n watched the exchange with shocked uncertainty. It frankly appalled her that this man was capable of being friendly, and even in such limited time in his presence. More importantly, she wondered, how could her father know this man? Why would her father know this man? Everything about this Alvin Marsh guy set her teeth on edge, and the only word coming to her mind for how to describe him was... slimy.

    "So," the butcher asked, gesturing around the shop. "is there anything I might be able to help you with? Or has my daughter taken care of you, already?"

    Y/n watched with great disdain as the man returned to her with another pointed look, glancing down at the packaged meat ready to go. He looks as if he's mulling it over, and finally, he clicks his tongue.

    "Sure," he nods, looking back to her father, chuckling dryly with one elbow back on the counter. "when she found the time,"

    "Ah, I see," He nods, sending a disapproving look to his daughter.

    "Y/n," he sighs, nodding in the direction of the back of the shop, still a stern look upon his face. "Go wash up and clock in early, I'll take care of Mr. Marsh, and the rest."

    Her mouth parted, ready to argue - not out of disappointment, for there was none, but to defend herself - when her father cut her off with a warning look.

    "Now?"

    She sighed heavily, her head rolling with her eyes as her arms snaked around to her back to untie her apron. At least she didn't have to pretend to care anymore now that she was technically off the clock. Her feet dragged across the ground subconsciously showing her frustration. As she made her way to the back when she heard that godawful grating voice again.

    "Unbelievable, isn't it? There's just no respect anymore."

    Y/n rolls her eyes when she hears her father chuckle. She sighs as turns the corner and hangs her apron up.

    "Yeah, I got one of my own at home. Gorgeous little one, feisty too. But one hell of a mouth. Real bitch sometimes,"

    Wide-eyed, and seeing red, Y/n is unable to take any more and heads farther back, slamming the door behind her, not caring if she took the fall for it later. Hell, she just might take the meat locker over that. She's shaking with rage, and his words echo in her skull still as she washes her hands. Her hands begin to sting and she realizes she had lost herself in thought and was just about to wear her skin down under the water as she scrubbed. Y/n shook her head, killing the water and drying her hands when her mind finally manages to break away from the creep when she thinks of the time.

    Fuck, it's already five!

    Quickly, she heads for the door to the meat locker, her nose already plugged when she pushes it open. Luckily, these trips were always fairly quick given the back door to the ally was just a few steps away, but what she saw when she stepped inside completely threw her through a loop.

    The back door was wide open.

    Upon first glance, she figured her father had opened it, and even though that was the most logical explanation, it didn't make sense. He never left it open. Not when he wasn't there. He was a stickler about that. Her head whips around the locker, but she was the only one. Fighting the urge to take an anxious deep breath, she creeps forward and peers around the corner, not knowing what to expect.

    Her E/C eyes widen happily and relieved when she realizes it was only Mike. But her happiness vanished just as soon as it had come when she saw the state he was in, nevermind the fact he was laying in the heap of recycling!

    "Mike!"

    He jumped as she stepped out into the light, the entrance to the meat locker was quite dark from where he sat. And before he knew it was her, all he had seen was something moving in the shadows towards him. Y/n felt her heart tighten at the sight, something clearly must have happened, and it must have been bad for him to be startled by her.

    Not unlike herself, though, he seemed to calm significantly when he realized who he was in company with. And yet, he still wasn't speaking. His eyes just bore into the darkness of the entrance, still panting heavily. Thick beads of sweat slid down his face.

    "Mike," she knelt beside him, subtly checking for any signs of injury. "what happened?"

    "I..." he gulps, finally breaking his gaze away and looking at her. "don't know."

    Her eyebrows raise a bit higher in question, and curiously she searches his eyes. "Do you want to talk about it?"

    Despite the comfort of her gaze, he breaks himself away from it to look back into the dark abyss, fearing It would come back. Whatever It was. And as he does so, he swears he can still hear the rattling of the chains and the bleating of a goat, and the very very very back of his skull was the chilling sound of a clowns laugh.

    "Mike?"

    He realizes he hasn't answered her yet, and quickly he shakes his head 'no'.

    "Here, let me help you," she rises to her feet, extending her hand.

    He gladly takes it, and despite his lingering fear from his encounters, she still manages to send a spark through his skin just with her touch. Little did he know, she felt the same way. Y/n pulls him to his feet, and already, his attention is centering away from the locker and towards her. She's watching him carefully, and only now does he fully process the intensity of the worry held in her eyes.

    "I-I think I'm okay," he stammers, chest still heaving with his labored breathing. "really."

    Y/n nods after a moment, concluding he must be telling the truth. Over time she had picked up on Mike's body language, including all of his tells. For instance, she could usually tell when he was hiding something. He'd always tug or scratch at his ear. Or when he was lying, the ends of his lips would twitch up. Almost as if subconsciously offering a guilty smile before quickly suppressing it. But Y/n found no such thing, and she felt the muscles in her shoulders relax.

    "Good," she sighs with a weak smile, her eyes falling to the ground. "Here,"

    Her hand leaves his and immediately, they both miss each other's touch but say nothing of it. She steps around him and begins picking up the many packages of meat that had spilled out of the basket. He joins her, just as soon.

    "Oh," he steals a glance at her, a small smile creeping up on him. "thanks."

    It goes away just as fast, his heart still aches from how hard it had been beating. Y/n does not fail to notice his darting glances over her shoulder at the meat locker. They both rise to their feet, and Y/n casts a confused glance over her shoulder before turning back to him.

    "Are you sure you're good, Mike? You don't seem yourself,"

    He sighs, not entirely sure himself. His shoulders rise and fall in a shrug, and his lips part to speak but the words die in his throat when he hears the sudden and obnoxious revving of an engine nearby. He flinches, head jerking in the direction of the sound.

    A ghostly expression washes over Y/n, and her anger visibly rises in seconds.

    "Was it Bowers, again?" She scoffs, just enraged at the thought of him and she even begins to stammer as she grasps for an insult, anger clouding her brain."That-That bigoted fucking... dickhole!"

    She stomps her foot and huffs, unable to properly deal with the overwhelming amount of anger and exhaustion building up in her. Mike looks at her with the tiniest hint of a bemused expression. His brow shot up and he almost felt a chuckle come out. Almost.

    "Dickhole?"

    "I know, I know," She chuckles dryly, the ends of her lips twitching up. "Shut up,"

    The chuckle in his chest breaks loose and he feels as if another piece of stress has been chipped away. A long process in the making, but it was better now that she was here. Mike had yet to find out, the same went for Y/n. Mike placed the packages he had collected thus far back into his basket and Y/n popped her head back inside to grab a small bin by the door. She brought the small container over, placing the few packs of meat she carried inside and the two filled it in a matter of seconds. Any trace of a smile has fallen off her face as she looks back up at her best friend, shrugging.

    "Well, he is," she defends. "All of them are. They're wrong in the head, Mike,"

    "Can't argue with that," He shrugs, sending a grimace down the alleyway where the Bowers gang had just disappeared. "Need any help?"

    "Nah, I got it. Thanks though," she grabs the bin, holding it against her frame and sends him a short smile. "Be right back,"

    He answers with a curt nod, his sweaty palms unknowingly rubbing against his jeans out of nervous habit. She disappears back into the darkness, and Mike immediately feels the weight her absence leaves. The guard she had coaxed down had returned, plaguing his mind as several scenarios spiral out in his brain.

    He couldn't tell her about the clown, he'd sound crazy! Hell, maybe he was. At least that's a what small voice told him in the back of his head, but deep down he knew what he saw was real. Real to him. Shaking that terrifying image from his brain would be harder than he thought.

    Don't forget the turtle.

    Mike shook his head, bewildered at the intrusive reminder his brain sent him. It was a strange sensation like the thought was not his own. It was a gentle voice speaking directly to his subconscious like a radio with interference. And yet, it didn't frighten Mike. Not at all like the dark, intrusive thoughts that had been occurring lately. This was soothing and gentle. Nonetheless, the message sent his hand flying for his pockets.

    Relief swept over him when he felt the small lump in his right pocket where the gift resided. He smiled to himself at the thought of giving it to Y/ n. He had been working on it all year, a small wooden turtle he had carved himself in the many free moments he had stolen on his grandparent's farm. Mike couldn't quite pinpoint the exact moment he had decided to make a turtle, or that it would come to be such a big secret he would keep until he could give it to her. He had just sat down one day and started carving as if something had compelled him to do so.

    And now here he was, ready to give her the small carved necklace. Mike was quite proud of it, not only was it his first carving but he had managed to secure it nicely in a thin - but sturdy - string of twine. Mike takes the time to spare a glance at the darkened doorway where his best friend disappeared, before his hand descends into his pocket, his heart hammering against his chest. His hand fishes amongst the pocket of denim and lint where his fingers find the cool touch of wood and twine. He pulls out the necklace and it dangles in the air as he carefully inspects it.

    Was the twine fastened tight enough? Was the belly of the shell smooth enough where it would rest comfortably on her chest without splintering? Most importantly... Would she like it?

    He sure hoped she would, given her connection to the reptile. She spoke often of it, the turtle that visited her dreams. Y/n never thought much of it, it had become merely a topic of conversation meant only for small lulls but she did find it funny the reoccurring figure. She described it as being the same turtle somehow, and it was never a threatening presence but a calm one. Like a guardian almost. It was a small and silly feeling that abandoned her by the time she was up and awake but little did she - or Mike - know just how deep the connection ran.

    These were all thoughts that flooded Mike's mind but he quickly has to put them and himself at ease. The hiss of the airlock to the meat locker and the backroom reached his ears and quickly he stuffed the necklace back into his pockets. When Y/n returns, looking far less than relaxed do all of his previous worries evaporate into the humid summer air. His hardened stare never leaves her troubled frown as she locks up the side door, all the while he grabs his bike.

    The pair falls into a comfortable silence as they head for the back of the alley where Y/n's bike was hidden. All that hung in the air was her defeated sigh that had accumulated after a long and stressful day, and the buzzing of cars as they passed by on the main road behind them. His worries now gone in the wake of her newfound stress he pulls up a curious brow as he walks his bike alongside her.

    "Rough day?"

    Y/n laughs dryly, nodding to her best friend as they round the corner and picks up her bike. "You could say that."

· · ─── ·𖥸· ─── · ·

    The town of Derry was quaint and rather cozy upon first glance. Quite a charming spot on the map with its snug downtown streets filled with local businesses such as Quality Meats. And one couldn't help but admire the long and beautiful running waters of the Kenduskeag stream that bled out from the Penobscot River, under the town and out into the Barrens stretching past the old train yard. The Barrens were the stretch of woods just outside of town.

    And it was precisely these woods that the pair had found solace in the cruel and evil world they called their home. Months after their meeting, they had both explored the Barrens and to their luck, they had stumbled upon the Fort. The Fort was what Y/n and Mike called the large pit they had discovered past the train yard and just over the stream. You had to swing across an old rope swing they had found, but that made journey all the more fun. They almost hadn't seen the Fort behind the fallen trees walled around and piled over the top.

    The way the trees had fallen it had created a rather spacious room just below the earth. When inside, one could see through the branches slats and out into the rest of the Barrens without being easily spotted. It made the perfect hideout from those who wished to see them harmed, and it also made a wonderful makeshift amphitheater. It was often they would look up from their conversations and see the wildlife walking around just feet away, still unaware of their presence.

    This is where they found themselves now, deep amongst the thickets, far away from their everyday troubles. It wasn't until they had abandoned their bikes at the stream to cross and venture deeper inside did they finally feel the effects of the change in scenery. At long last, the weight that settled on their hearts and troubled minds began to evaporate slowly as they inhaled the fresh and pleasantly overwhelming aroma of pine and fresh dirt. It blended perfectly with the dewy oak that hung in the air after the past week's summer storm, as did the gentle breeze that managed to reach them after a long journey through the trees.

    The sight of the Fort puts the last of their darkest thoughts to bed - for now. The crunching of twigs is the only sound that reaches their ears as they approach their haven. It is then that it occurs to Y/n, the birds have stopped singing. Come to think of it, she hadn't heard any birds in weeks. It was quite unusual considering these woods of all places were where their song carried the loudest. It was as if they were all... hiding.

    She realized even the atmosphere felt different, and not just in the Barrens. It had been a thought blooming in the back of her mind for the past few months; that the town had been cast into a dark shadow. While Y/n had lived in Derry all her life, it had always felt mysterious to her. But this was different, it was darker. Like a cloudless storm had rolled into Derry, with no intention of leaving.

    Mike brought her from her trance, pulling her gaze back down to earth from where it was previously fixed on the treetops.

    "I feel it, too."

    "What do you think it is?" Y/n asks finally.

    Mike's lips crease into a flat shrug, eyes flitting to the ground as his shoulders briefly rise.

    "I don't know," he sighs, his gaze trailing up to where hers laid in the treetops as if expecting to see this so-called storm with his very eyes. "But it's nothing good,"

    Her hardened frown turns back to the forest floor, blinking several times as she reached for a thought that was fast asleep in the farthest corner of her brain. It almost didn't even feel like a thought so much as a part of her brain itself. But it quickly dissipates as calm washes over her, taking with it any budding anxieties. She could almost laugh, none of this made sense. Y/n had been waiting all day to be here with Mike, and now she was.

    Y/n wasn't going to let anything ruin that. Or so she hoped.

    A coy smile plays at her lips as she picks up her pace towards the Fort, and swiftly she navigates through their hidden entrance. Her hopeful attitude is just infectious enough that it takes to Mike, and warmth blooms in his stomach as he quickly follows her. His feet bring him to the entrance of the Fort, and through the slats, he can see Y/n settling in.

    The sight of her relaxing brought a small smile to Mike's face, and quickly he joined her inside. The welcoming effect of the Fort just as soon touched him as it had her, and never had he been more relieved to see the sight around him.

    Soft light from the gas lantern bathed the small dome inside the earth, illuminating the many mossy branches perched above their heads. Several discarded wooden boards lay tucked into the dirt beneath their feet, creating makeshift wooden floors that had long been covered in several spare blankets they had brought. While the dome was just that, it was not a perfect circle. It was a bit uneven but this gave the pair the advantage of a single corner. This is where they kept the single beanbag they had managed to get their hands on.

    It was just as they had left it, a warm and cozy corner of the world that belonged just to them. It smelled just as the forest around them, only more intensified in their close courters.

[●●●●]

    Y/n stumbled away from the bean bag suddenly with a horrified shriek, her band coming to rest shakily over her mouth as she backed into the dirt wall behind her. Mike jumped to her side, eyes wide and fearful as his mind conjured every horrible possibility. The fear from the alley returned.

    "What? What's wrong?"

    A heavy sob was building in the far back of her throat, her wide e/c irises were beginning to dilate and her limbs trembled. Mike recognized within moments what had caused her such distress, having recognized an attack of hers like this only twice before. But the pain of seeing her so distraught was burned in his brain so he might never forget. His hand that had come to rest on her shoulder now brought her into his embrace. As she stumbled numbly into his arms he saw her eyelids screw shut, and several heavy tears were squeezed free.

    "Hey," he whispered soothingly, his hand rubbing circles in her back. "Hey, it'll be okay. You're not there anymore, you're not there. You're not there..."

    Slowly but surely her breathing becomes less ragged, and he can feel her head nodding into the crook of his neck as she takes in his words. Y/n's sniffles are loud in his ear but he couldn't care less. Mike just wanted her to be okay. He only now realizes he was still muttering sweet nothings into her ear as he feels his mouth grow dry.

    "We're okay, Y/n. You're safe."

    She takes a long and trembling breath that he can feel in the crook of his neck. Her breath brings out goosebumps on his skin but he quickly banishes the thought away in her troubled state. When she speaks, her voice is barely audible, even from beside his ear.

    "Thanks, Mike,"

    All he can find himself doing is pressing a flat smile to his lips, his eyes glazing over sadly at the limp pigeon in the corner behind the beanbag. The sight brings a strong and forceful wave of sadness that washes over him, but he knows it is not quite the same kind of sadness as she is experiencing. Finally, after almost twenty minutes have passed, she breaks away, sniffling.

    Mike feels the weight on his heart triple in size when she pulls away to reveal her puffy eyelids. The whites of her eyes are laced with red veins, and her trembling lips let loose a few shaky breaths. Immediately, she does all she can to wipe away the tears, but the evidence of her sadness remains. She shakes her head, disappointed in letting herself show this side and chuckles bitterly as she clutches her aching chest.

[●●●●]

    "I'm sorry,"

    "No," he says, shaking his head. "Don't do that, okay? You should never apologize for this. For feeling anything. You have your own baggage, just like everyone else."

    She chews the inside of her lip in a nervous habit, heat creeping up in her neck.

    "Sor-"

    He eyes her warningly, and she bites back a sheepish smile and clears her throat. "Okay."

    He studies her for a moment, not aware he is even doing so as her swollen eyes trail sadly across the room where the pigeon lays. He can hear a mournful whine building in her throat before he cleared his own with a somber expression.

    "It's okay, I'll take care of 'em."

    A weak, thankful smile flickers across her face and she watches thoughtfully as he rises and crosses the fort to the pigeon. He grabs one of the spare towels they kept around - sometimes the old rags they spread across the wooden grates would need a quick replacement, as they discovered the hard way - and knelt before the limp bird. Y/n finally rises to her feet decidedly and slips past Mike and outside the Fort without a word, a rusty trowel now in hand.

· · ─── ·𖥸· ─── · ·

The pair now stood before a small lump in the dirt, their heads pulled down with gravity as they stare at their feet. After Y/n had dug a small grave, Mike had buried the old pigeon, and the two had managed a small eulogy. Hosting a small funeral for a pigeon is certainly not what the two had envisioned their day would look like, but oddly enough, it was cathartic for both of them.

Mike was hardly old enough to remember his parent's funeral. The same could be said for Y/n, and like Mike, she hadn't exactly been emotionally or mentally present for her mother's funeral, for when the time came she had still been in quite the state of trauma. Y/n didn't like to talk about it, and in their year of friendship Mike had only recently found out, but she had been the one to find her mother's body as a very young child. So it was no surprise the familiar sight of the limp body brought her such distress.

    As her glassy eyes stare numbly at the mound in the dirt she feels a soft yet somehow calloused hand slip into her own, giving her palm a light squeeze. Her head feels heavier than normal in her crestfallen state, she notices, as she picks her stare up off the ground to look at Mike. He wears a small and gentle smile for her and gestures past her head towards the Fort that lies beyond only a few feet.

    "C'mon. We should settle in before it gets too much later."

    Her thumb flitters across his skin in response, and she nods. The two of them make their way back to their hideaway, the sounds of the earth beneath their feet filling the pensive silence once more. When they enter, her eyes flicker to the seat she was previously ready to occupy. A small shudder passes through her and she instead chooses the pile of blankets across the cramped room.

    Mike settles in beside her, his hands flying back to his pockets again to ensure the turtle remained on his person. Sure enough, the small wooden necklace could be felt floating amongst his things inside his pocket. He breathed a silent sigh of relief, one she would have caught had she not distracted herself with the task of fishing out their stored away activities. A deck of cards was pulled from the small and rusty tin lunchbox they kept there for storage, soon to follow was an equally rusty - and rather dusty - silver spoon. Y/n shrugs with the spoon in hand.

    "We could play Spoons or something?" Y/n suggested half-heartedly, her eyebrows falling into a curious frown. "Or was there something else you wanted to play?"

    He gulps nervously though he doesn't quite understand why he was even nervous in the first place, it was Y/n! Then again, all the more reason for his heart to be aflutter... It was Y/n.

    His sweaty palms return to his jeans and he wipes them anxiously hoping to keep his hands dry, and he sends her a weak and nervous smile.

    "I um," he cleared his throat, and she emptied her hands, curiously turning all her attention to him. "I uh, wanted to show you something I made?"

    "Oh," she says, a bit taken aback. "Yeah, okay. What is it?"

    Any and all responses he had gone over previously in his mind vanished into thin air, leaving him speechless. All he could do at that moment was fish into his pockets, his fingers lacing around the string as he pulled out the necklace. It dangles in the air, the soft golden light from the lamp beside them illuminated the many grooves engraved into the wood that created the illusion. It sways back and forth before their eyes, but his gaze is set not on the turtle but her.

    Her eyes had widened in reverence, and he could feel his heart swell with pride. She shakes her head in disbelief, the ends of her lips tugging up in a smile.

    "This is incredible, Mike!"

    He can feel a heat in his cheeks and the tips of his ears that could rival the summer sun. His grin widens bashfully.

    "Thanks," he says, gesturing towards her with the necklace, inwardly cursing at himself for this moment not going as smoothly as he had hoped. "It's, uh. It's yours. I made it for you. This was the surprise I was telling you about."

    Her attention is on him now, and he can feel his heart skip a beat. He notices that the swelling in her eyes has gone down a little, but the smallest of beads pool in her eyes. She was welling up a bit.

    "Mike," she breathes. "Thank you. I... Don't know what to say, I feel like "thank you" isn't enough."

    He shrugs as she takes the necklace into her hands to examine it more closely, her thumb tracing the shell of the wooden reptile as she gapes fondly at it. Unbeknownst to Mike, her stomach won't stop its series of flips. Finally, she looks back up at him, and he's happy to see the first genuine spark of glee in her eyes he had been longing to see all day. The pride in his chest grows even bigger knowing he had been the one to make her feel better, even if it was only a little.

    "I love it." She says finally.

    Y/n takes the necklace by the twine, parting it in two as she brings it to her neck. Her eyes are travel across the fort as her tongue pokes out from between her lips thoughtfully as she attempts to secure the necklace in place. She struggles for several moments, muttering a few frustrations to herself as she fumbles to tie the knot properly without it slipping from her fingers first. Seeing this, his own stomach doing a flip, Mike scoots himself closer and gestures to her neck.

    "Here, let me," he offers.

    A heat rages up from her neck and to her cheeks and ears, not unlike Mike had moments ago but she complies and turns herself so he can reach the back of her neck. He takes the twine from her hands, their fingertips grazing briefly creating a matching storm of butterflies in their stomach. And as Mike sets to work on the knot, neither of them can see the brilliant grins stretching across their faces that they wished to hide from the other.

    "There you go," he mutters shakily, praying she can't hear his voice wavering.

    She does, but it only sends her heart racing faster. She mumbles a 'thanks' as she turns back around, and sends him another thankful smile as she simpers down at the turtle that now hung from her neck. Already her fingers had snuck up to her neck to fiddle with the turtle, and a warmth washes over her.

    Y/n does not know whether it was her nearly intoxicating feelings for Mike, his kindness, the reassuring presence of the turtle, or perhaps all of the above, but she now felt a great deal better. It was as if a great weight had been taken off of her shoulders, the banishing of great unease as she wore the necklace now. Perhaps it was all in her mind, but Y/n rather enjoyed the strength the gesture had brought her.

    And maybe, just maybe, Y/n could take on whatever the future might throw at her.

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Black Lives Matter m resources, what you can do to help. Link in the comments below, can be accessed on any computer.

Support black owned businesses! There's this great app shared by @lovechlmt on Twitter, which I found on a post from Tumblr but either way I downloaded the app and it is a great way to find black owned businesses in your area! Please download and use if you can! It is called Black Nation

As I've heard, there is a wonderful website that provides therapy specifically for black and other poc, so you can speak to someone who shares your experiences and can truly get you the help you so deserve. Particularly black women. Its a simple url: therapyforblackgirls.com

Here's the description provided from @ madamblack on tumblr for the info:

"This reminds me, if y'all haven’t heard of therapyforblackgirls.com please visit if you need a therapist. You can search by mental health need, location/distance, insurance, etc.  I believe there are some that provide a sliding scale payment method for those without insurance.

If you’re not quite ready to make the jump, there is a podcast you can listen to as well as articles and links to help answer some of your questions about mental health and/or therapy.

The purpose, as I understand it, is to provide a place where black women can go to find culturally sensitive therapy. Some specialize in family/couples as well.

Take a look."

[Link]

I'd also like to provide additional resources that were added on to this source, this being a collection of free therapy resources found by @ ntbx on tumblr:

[Link]

As well as Black Minds Matter UK resource from @ girthcobain on the very same post.

[Link]

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Taglist:

@loversclwb @bibliophilesquared

Let me know if you would like to be added!

#lethobenthos #mike hanlon x reader #mike hanlon x you #chapter two the butcher's daughter #mike hanlon rewrite #MH rewrite #it reader insert #it reader rewrite #mike hanlon #chosen jacobs #derry maine #you'll float queue

[kusunogatari]

[ ObiRyū October | Day Twenty-Four | Artificial ] [ @abyssaldespair ] [ Uchiha Obito, Suigin Ryū ] [ Verse: Pretty in Pictures ]

[ Previous ] [ Next ]

“Tch…!”

With a far harder throw than she intends, Ryū pelts her phone against the top blanket of her bed, the mobile bouncing harmlessly against the plush surface.

She just gets so sick of this…!

Rather than the bed, she sits at her desk, burying her face in her hands as elbows rest atop it. She’s not even sure why this particular phone call is setting her off so badly. It’s just another party she’s being advised to attend by her agent. She’s been to more than she could ever count since she was fourteen and her contract was first drawn up.

But her temper has been rather...short lately. Or maybe her patience is a better word. She’s just so fed up with all of...of...this!

All of it!

The fake people, the fake smiles, the fake friendships...even her fake relationship. It’s all so obnoxiously artificial. While she’s been slowly waking up to this reality for a while now, it’s really been sinking in the last two weeks.

The last fourteen days since she nearly committed suicide.

For whatever reason, all the worries, all the thoughts she’d been holding back over the years had come to a head. Something about the charity auction and dinner had lifted it all to the surface at once, swirling in her mind like a whirlpool that dragged her down into the deepest depths of the depression she’d been trying desperately to deny. Her brain had latched onto how performative it all was. How much that bothered her. All the scummy people there to throw what looked like fortunes but were really drops in the bucket to make themselves look better than they were. It had left her feeling so sick, so...hopeless.

Then it had bled into the fragility of her own position. How her marketable looks and aesthetic could only last so long...how beauty and allure would fade, and then what? She’s been built into an image, but...what would she have left when that image changed? How much would she lose?

...and who?

A desperate walk for air and clarity had instead led her to the bridge near the hotel, the rushing waters a tempting way to let everything be washed away.

...but that was not to be, a stranger happening upon her. She’d nearly fallen in surprise, but he’d caught her, saved her, pulled her back to solid ground.

For a time she had no idea who he was...but managed to track him down with a little help from her assisant. She still only knows him by Tobi, but...he’s unlike almost anyone she knows.

He’s obviously not of the ilk she’s usually kept tethered to: rich, chic, sophisticated, fake. He’s a real person, with real struggles and problems and faults. Not like the spoiled brats she’s been forced to grow up with, complaining about nothing while those like Tobi struggle to survive. Hiding behind masks of marketing and social media. Appearing flawless, but hiding nasty, shallow realities behind their smiles.

It makes her so nauseous...but Tobi has been a crack in the dam. A knothole in the fence she’s been kept in for over a decade, giving a glimpse of the other side. While she’s still getting to know him, and maybe she should be skeptical of strangers...she can’t help but feel slightly attached to him. Largely, she suspects, because he saved her life (inadvertently or not), but also because he’s been a breath of fresh air socially. No pretenses, no one-upping, no grovelling (ugh, she hates when people do that…). He’s just...normal with her. Nothing like anyone she knows...except maybe her father. But even Jiraiya has his moments. Even now he still tends to baby her a bit, clearly a bit stuck on her being his “little girl”.

...she can understand it. Her career robbed them both of her growing up normally. Trying to cling onto that makes sense, really.

But it all comes together to exhaust her...she’s not her own person. Hasn’t been in over a decade. The facade is falling apart, she’s too tired to keep it up, she needs…

...a break.

The party is scheduled for tomorrow. Rather late notice compared to most social functions she gets roped into, but doable. Apparently she already has a fitting for a dress and professional makeup applications scheduled for her.

But the more she thinks about it, the more she makes up her mind.

She’s not going.

And she’s not telling her manager. She’s tired of the man’s grip on her, and maybe doing something of her own volition for once will help it sink in: she’s not just his plaything to make money with. She’s allowed to say no.

So, instead, she retrieves her phone (by now calmed down enough to feel bad for throwing it) and sends Tobi a text.

Are you doing anything tomorrow?

She can already hear the angry complaints: from her manager, her agent...Itachi. But damn it, she wants to make her own decisions for once! Nearly plummeting off that bridge has made her realize how much of her life needs to change. And she’s going to start changing it now.

A few minutes later, her mobile gives a buzz, and a few taps show a reply from Tobi.

Nothing important, no. You need something?

Her mouth settles into a determined line, quickly messaging back, I need an excuse to dodge a party tomorrow, and I think going to see a friend is good enough.

A bit of silence, then another reply. Haha! Standing up your snobby friends? I approve! Name the time and the place, we will do whatever you want.

A kind of giddiness overtakes her, a smile finally pulling at her face. Tobi is such a sweetheart. So much less rigid and ridiculous than anyone else she’s usually stuck with.

I’ll mull it over and let you know - nothing too drastic, just...a break from the drama.

She feels a lot better, now. Maybe...slightly nervous because she’s never been the rule breaking type. But damn it, she needs a break.

No one on her team - no one at all, really, except Tobi - knows about what happened on the bridge. Knows how low she got, how low she’s been. It feels like a facade she can’t drop. That if someone were to find out how close she’d been to jumping, they’d lock her up in a psych ward. She doesn’t want anyone fussing, but...she also wants a breather.

...she especially can’t let word get back to Jiraiya. It would break his heart. He’s already lost his wife...losing his daughter would crush him.

The thought alone makes her feel terribly guilty: how much she would have hurt him. But...she’s not going to get that bad again. No...things are going to change.

Even if that change is going to be painful...she hopes, in the end, it will be for the best.

With her plans arranged, she goes about her evening before turning in, a smile on her face as she slips into sleep.

Come morning, she’s made up her mind.

Have you ever gone rollerskating?

Tobi’s reply is a bit slow. That’s really random. Why?

I’ve always wanted to learn. Can that be what we do today?

I guess so, sure.

Sorry...I just need to do something NORMAL today.

No apologizing. It’s your decision! But I’ll warn you now...I don’t know how either. So when I fall on my ass, you can’t laugh.

Then you can’t laugh at me, either!

Grinning at her phone, Ryū then goes ahead and looks up the nearest roller rink. There’s one on the west side of town...that should work pretty well! She texts Tobi the address and they agree to meet there at noon.

Her dress appointment is at noon, and her makeup at three. Looks like she won’t be making those...

This almost feels like those playdates her mother used to take her on when she was really little: a bunch of kids brought together for an activity and to run out some energy while all the moms looked on. A reminiscent feeling of excitement builds in her chest.

This is exactly what she needs.

After a quick breakfast and picking an outfit, she gets in her car and starts making her way there. GPS guides her until she pulls into the lot. As it’s a Saturday, it actually looks pretty busy. Realizing she doesn’t know what Tobi’s car looks like (or...if he even has one), she instead heads inside and starts to shoot him a text to let him know she’s here.

“Hey!”

Jumping, Ryū turns to see...he’s already here! “Oh! Hey! I was just gonna text you - you haven’t been waiting long, have you?”

“Nah, got here a few minutes ago. Trying to decide how badly I want to embarrass myself,” Tobi replies with a grin.

“Well, everyone will be laughing at both of us, I assure you. But I’ve always wanted to learn how to do this, it looks so fun…!”

“Then that’s what we’ll do.”

They each pay for their admission before heading into the belly of the building. Most of it is taken up by the actual rink, but there’s also a place to sit and eat, to get your skates, and an arcade.

“Hungry?” she asks.

“Meh, not yet. Let’s give this a try first. Then we can have a pity lunch to nurse our inevitable wounds.”

That gets her to laugh. “Good plan!” At the skate counter, Ryū starts with the two-side roller skates rather than the single line of wheels on the roller blades. Surely that will be easier to keep her balance on.

Tobi, on the other hand, goes right for the blades.

“Feeling daring?”

“I figure I might as well go all-in,” he shrugs.

“You’re braver than I am, heh.”

Sitting on nearby benches, they swap their shoes for the skates. Still seated, Ryū gives them a testing roll against the carpet. “...oh boy…”

“Hey, it was your idea!”

“I know, I know! I’m just nervous.” She flashes an uncertain but excited smile. Clinging to the back of the bench, she hauls herself to her feet. For a moment she wobbles, but then regains her center of balance. “...okay...that’s not so bad.” As for how to actually move...she has no idea. Lifting a foot, she tries to take a step...and nearly crashes as her other foot bears all the weight and starts to move backward. “Oh sh-!”

Tobi, still seated, manages to grab her arm and steady her. “Easy!”

Color floods her cheeks, hoping no one saw that… “S-sorry.”

“You apologize a lot, you know that?”

“It’s...a bit of a reflex.”

Of course it’s then a gaggle of kids come zooming by, stopping as they spot Ryū’s trouble. “Hey! Need some help?”

She chuckles sheepishly. “Um...maybe…? How do you...go…?”

“Ya gotta push your feet out!” a little girl offers, giving a demonstration. Rather than moving her feet back and forth, she sweeps them out to the side. “So ya push!”

Ryū watches, blinking. “...so...like this…?” Cautiously abandoning her hold, she tries to mimic the motion. At first, she wobbles rather dramatically, arms flailing like a cartoon character to maintain her balance. But then she starts drifting forward, body getting accustomed to the leans. “...oh...wait...I-I think I got it?”

All grinning, the kids swarm around her, cheering her on as she practices on the carpet. Once she makes a few passes back and forth, she looks up to Tobi, grinning widely. “I’m doing it!”

He just snorts, still sitting. “Okay, good. Now you have to teach me.”

For a moment, the kids pause as they look at him.

“My friend and I have never roller skated before,” Ryū offers. “But he said we could learn together! He’s Tobi - I’m Ryū!”

The kids’ wariness then seems to ease, and they start encouraging Tobi to his feet.

“Now, uh...I have a bit of a bad leg. So go easy on me,” he asks, wobbling much as Ryū did as he gets going. But slight infirmity aside, he manages to get the hang of it after a few passes. Ryū can’t help but giggle as the kids give a cheer at his success.

It’s Tobi’s turn to give a shy smile. “...well. I haven’t fallen yet.”

“No, not yet. But we’re still going slow on the carpet.”

They agree to practice a bit more, the flock of children disappearing back to the crowd on the rink. Soon enough they’ve mastered the carpet.

Time to try the smooth wood of the rink.

“...can I ask a stupid question?” Ryū offers as they approach one of the gaps in the wall to board the rink.

“Sure?”

“Can I hold your hand? Just to help, uh...steady myself?”

She knows that might be a bit weird. While she herself considers Tobi a friend - maybe not yet a close friend, but a friend nonetheless - she also knows the gesture might be a bit...forward.

But to her surprise, despite a small pause, he nods. Gripping his hand and weaving their fingers, Ryū takes the first step. And oh boy is it slippery. “W-whoa, okay, uh…” Hanging onto the wall, she lets Tobi follow behind her. Once they’re both a bit steady, they wait for a gap before merging onto the outermost layer of the rink.

They’re slow, and people keep passing them, but...they aren’t falling. Synching up their steps, they find a rhythm and start gliding smoothly in an oval around the outside.

Realizing she’s actually doing it, Ryū’s expression brightens, a smile lifting her lips and eyes shining with childish excitement. How long has she wanted to do this, and now she’s just...doing it! She made a plan, and stuck to it.

...when was the last time she was able to do that?

From the corners of his eyes, Tobi watches her, expression unreadable.

They do a few passes before agreeing to peel back off. Breath a bit elevated with adrenaline, Ryū looks to Tobi with uncensored joy. “That...was amazing!”

He laughs, not...really seeing the appeal of going around and around in a circle. But it’s making her happy. “Should we eat something?”

“Yeah!”

It’s mostly just pizza and the like, so they settle on splitting one. Sipping her soda, Ryū watches the other skaters from their elevated table along the edge.

“So, why roller skating?”

“Huh?”

“Why was roller skating what you picked to do today?”

She chews her straw, thinking. “...I dunno. Just seemed like fun. Kids used to skate on the street I lived on when I was a kid, but...I never got to do it. My mom always said I was too young and that I’d get hurt, and then...we moved after she died. I kinda forgot about it. But I think I just figured it was one of those childhood things I missed out on with how I was raised. So...maybe it was a bit immature to ask for it, but...I wanted something normal. Something boring.” There’s a pause. “...that really makes me sound like a privileged jerk, doesn’t it?”

“Psh, no,” Tobi assures her, waving her concern aside. “I’ve never done it either. Just depends on how you were brought up.”

“I guess so. But I mean...asking for something normal and calling it boring. Do I sound rude, wording it like that?”

Another wave. “No. You said it yourself before: you live in a fake world. Wanting something that feels outside that...bubble is your right. Don’t worry about it. Any time you need a break, just let me know. We’ll do something boring.”

His reply makes her laugh. “Want to do some more?”

“Ah, I’ll wait. My leg’s a bit sore.”

Worry immediately colors her expression. “You okay?”

“Fine, fine. You go, I’ll watch. Don’t fall, hm?”

“I won’t, I won’t…” Giving him one last glance, Ryū then abandons the table and heads back out onto the rink.

Once she’s gone, Obito grabs a pill vial from his coat pocket, popping a pill and washing it down with soda.

What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

And as he promised, he watches her do her circles, slowly getting more confident and extending her movements. They even play a game she participates in, getting eliminated about halfway through. Even in her defeat, sitting in an alcove along the rink, she’s pink-cheeked and grinning.

...she really is having a blast, isn’t she?

He can’t help but be a bit envious of that. Of getting so excited over something so simple. But...well, she has reasons to be. Her life - while in some ways so much easier than his own - is still riddled with problems. Getting a moment to get away from that seems to be doing her a lot of good.

Eventually she comes back, sitting with a gasp to catch her breath. “Man...I’m tired! I didn’t think it would be such hard work, but...my legs are sore! How’s yours feeling…?”

“Fine, I took some Advil. I’ll be all right. It just gets stiff sometimes.”

As he’s becoming familiar with, uncensored concern colors her face. “All right...I’m sorry, I didn’t even think about…?”

“I told you, it’s fine. Glad I got to do a bit. Maybe it’ll be good exercise for it.”

“...okay.”

“So, want to go again, or…?”

“I think I’ve had my fill for a while. What about you, anything else you want to do?”

“Nah.”

Finished, they turn in their skates and retrieve their shoes before heading to the door. It’s there they have to part ways.

“Hey...thanks for humoring me today,” Ryū offers, a bit bashful. “I had a lot of fun…!”

“M’glad. So...how many angry texts do you have?”

“No idea, I turned off my phone. I’m sure I’ll get earfuls from everyone later, but...for right now, this was more important. I...really needed today.”

Tobi looks her over thoughtfully. “...feel better?”

“Better than yesterday, at least.” She gives a tired smile. “...slowly but surely.”

“...good. Well, you better go hide for a few more hours, hm? And I need to get home.”

“Thanks for going with me.”

“Of course. Next time you want to be a rebel, let me know,” he grins, watching as she waves (Tobi returning the gesture) and returns to her car.

...well, that went better than he expected. Seems she’s starting to test her new boundaries, figure out what she can get away with and what control she can start taking back.

It’s only a matter of time before she starts questioning things beyond her schedule.

Obito grins to himself, checking his phone to ensure he didn’t miss anything important. But he finds himself distracted, remembering the look of wonder on Ryū’s face.

...it was cute.

...he’d bet a hundred dollars she’s never had that look when around Itachi. Just those artificial smiles to placate him.

And Obito can’t help but smirk at that.

Obito one, Itachi zero.

     ...okay this is actually really cute and makes me wanna get back into roller skating kjdhfgjh - that was totally random but maybe my subconscious is trying to tell me something xD      So this is meant to be pretty early in PiP: only about two weeks after the first bit I ever posted. Hence Ryū knowing Obito by ‘Tobi’ and not yet knowing he’s an Uchiha or anything. So just a lil bonding time for the pair of them ;3      Anywho I am...still a day behind (again OTL) so I’ma try to at least start today’s, maybe finish it in the morning and get back on track! Thanks for reading~

#obiryū october #abyssaldespair #uchiha obito #suigin ryū #pretty in pictures [ au ]

[rayegunn]

Thor ramble

Preview for Thor is out: https://www.adventuresinpoortaste.com/2020/03/06/marvel-preview-thor-4-2/  I felt the need to ramble about it. It’s been a while since I’ve had a good ramble here.

First off, to Sif Bifrosting Mjolnir away.... hehehehe... good trick. And Thor deserves it right now. He needs to have his toys taken away until he behaves, I don't give a damn if he's king, he’s being an ass. Not that he will, probably, looks like he's about to throw a tantrum there, but still. I mean look at that, he's already beaten a close friend of his to a pulp and destroyed his hammer, and now Sif, his ex lover and current friend, and now guardian of the Bifrost, shows up to defend Bill and repeat what should be a uncontroversial opinion, that helping Galactus to destroy inhabited planets, and beating up your friends, is wrong, and his response is to hurl the hammer at her head. I mean I thought Thor was being a dick when he threw it at Loki, despite Loki's past, but THIS? Much worse. I get that he feels the fate of the universe is on the line, and that sacrifices need to be made towards that end, which mitigates it some, but... there has to be a better way to resolve this conflict than with violence. Thor has been acting all hyper-aggressive and, well, toxic from issue 1, and just seems to be getting worse. I see a lot of Thor fans glad that he's like, really powerful and kicking ass, and I don't get it. Is him being powerful worth it if he loses his soul and sacrifices his morals in the process? tho I have never gotten the obsession some fans with characters being powerful, it's always been much more important to me that they are interesting characters first and foremost, and that usually means they have flaws and weaknesses and can't just steamroll everything. I do think a story exploring power vs morals with Thor, where he sacrifices his morals for power in order to achieve a greater good could be interesting and could end up adding more depth to the character, so I am not saying the story is bad... but it is still sad to see him possibly fall  from grace, same as it would be for any character in that position, and all the power in the universe doesn't make up for that. In Aaron's run, his unworthyness wasn't really a fault of his character, it was a technicality. He was still the same guy, morally, as he was before (tho he did go through a rough patch due to depression) it was just he lost the whole 'knowing you're unworthy but trying anyway' thing that apparently is a major box that needs to be ticked for Mjolnir to allow itself to be lifted. This though, I am seeing what he's doing, and I think to myself that it's no wonder the hammer is getting heavier, because this really is the sort of 'doing evil things for a greater good' deal that I could see Loki doing rather than Thor. If Loki was doing this, it would still be a very murky situation, but it would be in line with his past actions and morals. But for Thor, it's a fall, and that kind of makes his actions feel worse. I'm more upset  at him doing these things than I would be if it were Loki, because Loki has already done this kind of shit before. Recently, even. Maybe not on quite the same scale, I can't think of any planets Loki has blown up off the top of my head, (in the present/past, not counting King Thor) but same sort of morally questionable tactics, so  it would not be that unexpected for him.

I'm betting that Thor will successfully deal with the Black Winter using these tactics, despite various characters, such as Bill and Sif here, standing against him, and that will make him feel everything he did was just and right, he will feel vindicated. And yeah, you could make an argument for that, depending on what he does, I mean, the universe continuing to exist when it otherwise would have died is a bit hard to argue with. And many fans will support his actions because the ultimate outcome was good. But... it may be the start of a slippery slope that he slides downwards on. If these tactics worked out here, why not in a different situation with lower stakes? Will the justification he needs to do these things become less with time? And he will fall, not like Aaron's run where he was unworthy but not immoral, an actual fall from grace where he loses his way. And he, and many fans, may not even realize it until it's too late. Hell, some fans will NEVER get it if he goes bad. I mean, I’m not saying people have to stop liking him as a character, but you can like a character while acknowledging they are not the most morally upstanding person. Liking Punisher doesn't necessarily mean you support gun toting vigilantes wandering the streets, right? I hope, anyway. Like, I think lots of things Loki has done have been pretty scummy, even recently, but that doesn't make him an uninteresting character, I still really like him as a character even if i disagree with some of his actions. Though Loki's trajectory is good right now, while he is still prone to morally murky actions, he's moving in the right direction, his actions right now are comparatively better than they used to be, so I am hopeful he can continue to  improve. But Thor’s trajectory, if this trend continues, is not good, his actions right now are comparatively worse than he has been previously. It's kind of funny, or sad, that as Loki is moving away from these 'bad acts for a greater good' methods, Thor is embracing them, and they may end up still as antagonists, but on opposite sides. (I want them to be friends tho :( ) But some fans (of lots of things, not just Thor) really seem to have a lot of trouble understanding that the protagonist is not always right by default, and they think anyone who stands in the protagonist's way is the bad guy, even if it is clearly a villain protagonist, (see: Breaking Bad) which is bizarre to me.  And I suspect the same will happen with Thor, even if he does not go THAT bad, and just... gray. Comics have long had a bit of a problem with fans completely missing the point when it comes to the morality the books are trying to get across; you somehow have some overtly bigoted X-Men fans, and alt-right Cap fans, etc. it's bizarre sometimes how completely some readers/viewers can miss a critique of something in a work, and the same thing will likely happen here, where the point may be that he’s losing his way, but fans think he’s in the right.

Where did she send Mjolnir, though, i wonder? I have long suspected Thor would have to give up Mjolnir, but because he is all-Father now. Aaron set up a situation with roles that need to be filled, and several other characters have stepped into new ones, Jane is Valkyrie, Sif took Heimdall’s role, Balder is King of the Norns, it looks as though Tyr is going to take Loki’s place as God of Chaos, (though it may be Loki’s solo series was more of a spoiler than most people thought, where Thor was the big bad at the end of time, trying to destroy the Earth, and Thor goes full on bad guy instead, though i am holding out hope for merely gray which he can rebound from after learning a lesson) Loki is King of Jotunheim (tho i suspect there is something more in store for him, given all the teases with him and Mjolnir) and I really like this. I know some people find comfort in an unchanging status quo, but I have always found it boring, and one of the reasons I have been all over Loki the past 10 years or so is that he has been undergoing character development and changing, and I find that interesting. So to have it suddenly applied to Asgard as a whole, where everything is shuffled around and characters are in new roles is something I find very interesting, and I want to see where it leads, and I hope it doesn’t all just revert to the old default status quo. But Thor stepped into his role as king, but didn’t want to give up his old role, and I think that has to give at some point. He has to choose, even if he was not doing some morally dubious shit, All-Father OR hero of the realms, can’t do both at the same time. After last issue, i thought Bill might, at least temporarily, take Mjolnir from Thor, (though, since he has no ties to Earth 99% of the time, I don't think he is right fit to fill Thor's old role permanently) but now it's who knows where, so maybe not. But he's still had Stormbreaker destroyed. :-/ anyway, it has to be really far away, or Thor's just going to call it back in like 2 seconds, not quite sure how far away they are relative to Asgard/Earth, so sending it back there may be far enough... or maybe Jotunheim? Though not sure why Sif would do that. But it could turn the scene with Loki in issue 1 into foreshadowing, if it pops out of the Bifrost coming for his head and stops again. May also be a catalyst to have Thor attack Jotunheim, even tho Loki had nothing to do with this.  But it may also be too easy for him to find in those locations, if she really wants to keep it from him until he calms down, it would be better to send it to some dusty moon orbiting an uninhabited world  around a distant star. Though with Sif controlling the Bifrost, she could simply refuse to send him anywhere near it, regardless of it's location. He may be king, but she has the power in this situation. Also, I wonder how it's trajectory works. Will it carry on with just the momentum it has on the other side of the Bifrost, eventually falling to the ground or hitting something on the other side, or will it try to continue towards his intended target? Though I suppose it doesn't matter too much, if he can summon it no matter how far away it is, so it will be on it's way back to them either way. Though it may be that it is out of range, he may not be able to call it if he doesn't know it's location, (he asked where it was, so he doesn't seem to be able to sense it) or if it's just too far away.

#ramble #comics #marvel #thor #loki #sif

[ardentmuse]

Why You Fight - Kingsman

Primary reasons I imagine you’d fight in your relationships with the Kingsman. Sorry for the double-whammy of sad stuff today. gifs via google, credit to creators. 

Warning: General angst all around (especially in Harry’s), talk of sex in Tequila’s

Masterlist

Merlin - Jealousy

To be fair, Merlin and you rarely “fight.” Instead, Hamish just declares that he “doesn’t want to talk about it” and broods. Hard. He broods for hours in his office tinkering, usually with no real goal in mind other than to give him an excuse to create space from you and calm down.

He knows it is stupid. He knows you love him. But he also knows how smitten he was with you almost instantly, how beautiful and intelligent you are, but most importantly how much younger than him you are, able to catch the attention of any more suitable partner who might come along.

You’ve never given him reason to doubt. Every time someone obviously flirts with you, you simply say you are not interested and come find him wherever he is. But men can be persistent, scummy little things, he knows. Sometimes they do not respect you enough to take your ‘no’ seriously, forcing Merlin to step in, much to your dismay. But more often than not the issues arise when you don’t even realize that someone has their sights on you. When Merlin points it out, you brush it off as them “just being nice,” and that is when Merlin loses it. He’ll raise his voice, telling you that you need to stick up for yourself better and stop being so doe-eyed about the world. You don’t see what he sees and sometimes he feels like you don’t even care, though he knows he is just insecure about not being everything you deserve. When you’d try to get him to explain his feelings more, he’d ask you for space to think and make for his office.

After several hours alone, he’d emerge and apologize for his outburst by helping you. You’d know he was ready to talk when you’d receive a text a few hours later saying, “I’m making dinner. What would you like, love?” or “I scheduled the hair appointment you’ve been talking about for Tuesday at 4pm.” Then, late in bed that night, you talk for real, make up, and make love, reassuring Hamish that you aren’t going anywhere.

Harry - Work

Harry wasn’t used to having to consider someone else’s needs. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to. It was just still a foreign idea to him and it took mental work to remember that he couldn’t just go whenever work called without informing you.

A few times early on in your relationship, you would find yourself alone for an event he promised to take you to or for your weekly nights in with a classic movie and take out. You’d call him to get his ETA, only to discover he was on a boat in Yokohama or in the mountains outside Davos or on an airplane heading to the States. But after every time, he’d come to your home, place flowers on your nightstand, and crawl into bed with you. He’d spoon you, begging your forgiveness between soft kisses of your neck and shoulders until you’d turn to him and kiss him in earnest.

It all came to a head when you discovered Harry downstairs in the wee hours of the morning walking out the door, right before your parents were supposed to arrive to meet him. You lost it, told him that if his work was more important than you then he might as well not return. He tried to reason with you and explain how important this mission was, how’d he be back before dinner, but you wouldn’t hear it. If he thought leaving without a word of warning was acceptable, he clearly didn’t see you as a priority. You kicked him out into the night.

You were making dinner, trying to figure out what to tell your parents, when the doorbell rang. Harry stood outside, dressed for dinner, a bottle of wine and flowers in hand. You went to shut the door in his face when he reached out to you. “I didn’t go” he said, “I thought about it. I made it all the way to the tailor shop before I realized I had just lost the best thing in my life because I was too scared to let loving you change me. But I want to change. I need to change. There is too much good here to throw it away because I’m stubborn. Please? Just one more chance and if I screw this up, you’ll never hear from me again.”

You let him back into your house and into your heart, where he has been ever since.

Eggsy - Family

Dean. God, Dean. He was literally the worst man either you or Eggsy could imagine. On that, you agreed. What you didn’t agree with was Eggsy brawling a grown man in the middle of a crowded pub. Eggsy was a Kingsman now. He had resources at his disposal to protect his mother and sister other than his fists. But this was personal for Eggsy, you knew, and so while you fought about it initially, you quickly moved on to help Eggsy heal and to take care of Daisy, whom you loved endlessly.

But then there is your family. Eggsy is so afraid of them, even though you’d done nothing to give him reason to think they might not like him. His family has been so dysfunctional since Dean came into the picture, that he has a hard time remembering what a reasonable family looked like. So he is constantly going overboard trying to impress your relatives: hostess gifts every visit, intense research on everyone’s careers and interests, telling lies about himself to fit in better. That last one is the one that really makes you mad. Why can’t he just accept that your family just wants you to be happy and that he’s already won them over by being your source of joy? All his strategies only make it worse.

You get particularly angry when you learn that Eggsy has been spending time with your parents without you. Having you there giving him side-eye usually helps to reign in his antics, so the idea of him alone with them scares you. But all that is put aside when he asks you to marry him, your parents having helped to coordinate the whole thing.

Tequila - Sex

Your relationship with Tequila has always been quite physical. He’s an affectionate man, and was so even before you became exclusive. But having a sexual relationship with him is an entirely different thing.

At first, the constant need for each other was exciting. You loved feeling so wanted and he loved how much you wanted him in return. And don’t get me wrong, the sex is still mind-blowing. But it is just ALL THE TIME. It feels like you are constantly in the middle of a single years-long sexual encounter. You’d wake up to light caresses that turned into something heated. He’d take care of you, pop up from between your legs, ask what you wanted for breakfast, and leave the room like nothing happened. Then, at the breakfast table, he’d want to finish what was started in the bedroom. It was exhausting.

You weren’t an on-off switch. You needed some time and dedication. Thankfully, when you communicate this, Tequila is more than willing to set aside the time you need to fully enjoy yourself, to build up and come down from your high in an enjoyable way. It just takes more reminders than you would like.

Thank goodness you both like cuddling so much because if Tequila gets too handsy and you aren’t into it, he’s always okay with just holding you while you watch a movie or falling asleep wrapped in each other. He just wants to be close to you, whatever form that may take. And you can’t really fault him for that.

Whiskey - The Past

You will never be able to replace his lost love. You know that. And you’d never want to. Everything Whiskey went through in his life brought him to you.

But sometimes he’ll say things, just little things offhandedly, that make you realize there is a subtle comparison going on in his brain. Even if he isn’t aware of it, he is imagining how his life might be different if you were a woman with a different face holding a child instead of a pistol.

And that hurts endlessly. It makes you feel like you are still second-best, still just a consolation prize since he isn’t able to have what he actually wants. When he says something that brings you down, like how she used to make the best pies or how her baby bump was much rounder than yours, you go off by yourself to some corner of the house to cry.

Whiskey would realize what he did the moment he did it. He was very conscious of how his past impacted his relationship with you.  He couldn’t stop his brain from wondering how his life might have been different, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love the way his life is now. He will shower you with love and gifts as a means of seeking your forgiveness, to prove how intimately he knew you, how much he needed you. And he does need you, desperately. And he holds you through the night to remind himself that anything keeping him from loving you fully is not worth his mental energy. 

All tags: @fangirlandnerd​​, @aerdnandreaa​​, @thisisbullshytt​ 

#kingsman #kingsman imagine #kingsman headcanon #eggsy #eggsy unwin #harry hart #merlin #merlin kingsman #tequila #tequila kingsman #eggsy x reader #harry hart x reader #merlin x reader #tequila x reader #whiskey #whiskey kingsman #agent whiskey #whiskey x reader

[mergeatrois]

Obsession

I’ve developed a crush on my roommate Aly. I’ve had these feelings for a while now and I just feel hopeless. I’ve tried making a few moves here and there but I don’t think I’m getting through to her. I’d typically lust after the frat boys that attend our school but it’s so different with her. We share so many interests, humor, media and all that, and I’ve never seen a girl as hot as her before. She’s so comfortable with me around that she doesn't even mind walking around our place in her tight nighttime clothes, it’s so hard to sit still when I see her like that.

I don’t see her running around with guys all that often but when she does I get so jealous. Watching her lock lips with some jock or hearing her getting plowed by some meat-headed frat boy would bounce me off the walls. I’d give anything to be the one on top of her. I only bring this up because she’s been seeing this guy recently. A hunk, of course. She really had a type I guess. I’ve only seen him a few times. He’s big alright. A big, burly 230 pound slab of pure strength. His messy black hair and dark stubbled chin made him look insanely dashing despite his profession and god, his body. His pecs were nice and plump, I just wanted to grab a handful of them and his arms were so fucking huge. His biceps are big and beefy. They looked so big that I think I could hang off them if he flexed hard enough. Aly definitely had a type, but this guy in particular was stunning.

They’ve only had a few dates and me and Aly would talk after each one. I’d try and probe their relationship as much as possible, especially all the sexy details. Fortunately for me, she hasn’t gone all the way with him yet, but the two had really good chemistry together. It was inevitable that they’d fuck, and I’d have to be the one hearing her moans from a distance. I was bummed out. I’d panic whenever she went out to spend time with him. The idea of him smashing her curvy, petite body underneath those muscles drove me mad. I felt cornered, doomed. I couldn’t bear her being with anyone else but me. I’d have to use my powers or else I might just go crazy.

I faked being sick and asked Aly if she could go out and run a few errands for me. She’s so caring so she happy obliged and told me to get some rest while she went out to make a care package for me. A few minutes after she left I jumped up and decided to give her little “boy toy” Max a visit. I walked over to his frat house, a million thoughts ran through my head. “How am I gonna get him alone? What if his body is resistant to my powers? What if I can’t fill his role?” I almost thought about backing out but when my gut started telling me to stop, I found myself already knocking on the front door of his frat house. I almost ditched out, but a jock in a tight t-shirt answered the door. Not Max, but definitely one of his friends. Birds of a feather I guess. “Oh hey Liz, whatcha need?” he said with a smirk, I could see his eyes creeping up and down my body but I did my best to ignore his perverted gaze. “Uh..yeah is Max around?” I say awkwardly, trying to look around the doorway instead of focusing on him. His face seemed to droop in disappointment. He said before saying “Uh, yeah. Max is upstairs. He’s working out pretty hard, he has a match next weekend so he’s training extra hard today. Try not to bother him too much.” He steps aside and invites me in and I cautiously walk into the house. The floor is littered with gym equipment, beer cans, and burned down joints. Typical I guess. I begin walking up the stairs and I can hear a loud grunting coming from one of the rooms.

I walk closer and the grunts progressively get louder and louder, morphing into mighty roars of exhaustion echoed by the clanking of heavy metal. The door is cracked and I stop myself from barging in. I peek into the room slowly and there he was. Max is dressed in a small grey tank top and black gym shorts. His tank was covered in large dark spots of musky sweat and his gigantic arms and pits were bursting from the large arm holes on both of his sides. He was lying down on the bench, doing intense reps with a big iron bar that was covered in giant metal weights. Holy shit, It looked like he could’ve benched two of me. He roared in between reps as he benched the overwhelmingly heavy bar over and over. He was so hyped from the weight that I could even make out his dick bulging hard against his black shorts. Fuck, there’s no more wonder now. Of course Aly was into this guy, he was a total beast. His handsome, masculine face looked red and fatigued and he pumped the bar desperately to finish his last grueling set. I couldn’t sit still again. I began twisting in place as I watched his muscles bulge and thrust out as he bench pressed over and over again. He was really pushing himself hard. With one final shout, he lifted the massive bar high into the air before setting it down on its rest. For a minute he laid there, breathing deeply, trying his hardest to catch his breath. His chest swelled up and pushed the carbon out of his big athletic lungs. God he’s so hot, that tank wasn’t helping either. The way it clung to his chest and squeezed the muscle like skinny, groping fingers made my knees weak. He lied there for a minute. Then another. And another. His arms swung lazily on the sides of the bench and I became a bit worried. I flung open the door and asked “Hey max, you alright?”

No response. He laid there almost motionless but I could still see his chest sucking in and pushing out as he slept on the bench. He was out cold from the workout. His eyes were closed shut and his breaths became less desperate and more rhythmic as time went on. I shook him a bit, trying my best to wake him up, even lightly yelling his name. Nothing worked. This was actually perfect.

Here he was, the 6’2 giant of a man was mine to control, sprawled out and presented to me like a gift from god. I close the door behind me and lock it and begin stripping naked. It felt so strange to be in a strange place nude but I had to get over my insecurity. It almost felt scummy to do this with my crush’s date but it had to be done. I walk up to the bench and pull his shorts off completely. After they’re off, a huge bulging mound is revealed on his crotch. A nice compacted mound, filled with his thick cock. I almost felt the urge to try something but I had to focus on the task at hand. I turned my back to him and laid down on top of his massive, muscle brimmed figure. Admittedly I took so much pleasure from lying on top of his sexy body but I kept my focus. I balanced myself on his muscle covered body and pulling up his briefs. I slip my legs inside, making sure to leave enough space for me to fit in somewhat comfortably. So far so good, until I feel his cock pressed firmly against the back of my thighs as I slide inside. It felt almost wrong and I squirmed a bit in reaction. This was Aly’s date, what a shitty friend touches their friend’s date like this? It’s all for the greater good Liz, just calm down. I take a deep breath and sink lower into the breaths, letting out soft quiet moans as his hard cock slides against my body. His cock is pressing firmly against my ass but I ignore my lustful urges and peel back his tank.

While pulling back his tank I unveiled his shredded abs, They were compact and hard, harder than his dick even. They felt like chiseled stone as my fingers ran across them. God, what a body. I can’t wait til Aly sees me in this. I free enough space in his tank to tuck myself inside and then I feel a wave of vibrations pulsing between our two naked bodies. I begin sinking into him slowly while staying on top of him. I close my eyes shut tightly and push my ass into his crotch fast. It felt so good as his rock hard cock shoved inside of me. It felt like I was cheating on my friend, my crush, but I knew it would all be justified soon enough. I sink deep down into his wide, powerful hips until I can feel his cock twitching as it poked out hard from his body. I could feel his large trunk-like legs as if they were mine. No, they are mine. His cock too. It felt so strange but god, it really did feel good. All the hours of porn I’ve watched couldn’t prepare me for this. My new dick was thick and girthy, I could just tell by the the feeling of it shooting out of my giant waist. It was a nice length and the shaft was covered in pinkish veins. It was nice and girthy too. I never would have thought that having a cock would feel this good. The thoughts running through my mind of pounding Aly’s tight little body made my throbbing pole ache and quiver. “Mmmm Aly, I can’t wait for you to see me like this!” I exclaimed.

A realization came to me and I turn my head up towards Max’s face. I didn't notice his moans as I merged with his body, no doubt he was feeling the merging pleasures too. His workout was still mega intense, he was still knocked out and winded. Thank god, I could continue without stress. I press my back into his torso. I sunk down into his muscled frame. His cut, rock hard abs pushed against my back. Feeling their tight mass sink into my body felt amazing. That chest of his absorbed me so easily. The merge was almost complete and his brawny chest had nearly swallowed my cute, slender frame. When I get low enough inside of his body, I lean back my head and push into his rough, masculine face. I close my eyes and let the big unconscious hunk absorb the my head and the rest of my torso.

My eyes are still closed but my chest tightens fiercely. It’s so hard to breath. I gasp for air and my chest feels way different than before. My chest feels musclebound and burly. I finally open my eyes and look down my bulging, hair chest. “Holy shit…” I whisper while taking in the view. I gasp in shock and covered my mouth with my new big meaty hands. My voice. It’s so deep now. It scared the shit out of me but in a way, I really liked the way I sounded. I bring down my gigantic mitts for hands so I can get another view at that big, husky chest. Small black hairs run down the length of my barrel-chested frame. I traced the rows of hair down my chest until they disappeared beneath my damp, smelly tank. “Fuck, I feel kind of gross.” I say before grabbing the neck hole of the tank with my right hand and lifting it up. The view was amazing. The dark hairs glistened with sweat as the light shined on them. I traced the glimmering stubble down between my sexy, bunching pecs. I was so excited that my pecs were squeezing together nice and tight, their muscle bunched together so roughly. “So….hot.” I let out a wide cocky smile as I stare at my own amazing figure. I never knew being a stud could feel so good.

I barely noticed before but my athletic musk escaped the tank top as I peeled it off my swollen torso. The smell no longer bothered me, it actually really turned me on, I could feel my monster of a cock struggle to break out of the tight briefs. I take a look at my big muscle covered arms. My guns were thick and powerful. I stared deeply into their overwhelming mass before instinct kicked in. I flexed them nice and hard, letting my veiny muscles become even more defined and prominent. My biceps bulged out and the taut skin that covered them turned a light shade of red as I pushed harder to flex them even more. My hairy armpits became deeper and deeper as I flexed. They were so nice to look at. I never even noticed how hot pits could be on a guy. The way my muscles surrounded my hair covered made them look nice and deep. Their masculine physique made my cock uncontrollable. “I should really get going before someone sees me. I should really….” My thoughts stop dead in their tracks. I can’t rip my gaze away from my muscular cannons. I became curious and grabbed the middle of the bar hovering over my chiseled face. I grab it hesitantly, feeling unsure of my ability, but the urge to lift was coursing through me. My herculean chest because heavy with anticipation and I finally lift the bar from the rack and start pumping the bar up and down.

Holy fuck, I’m doing it! I can’t mutter the words, the heavy bar is taking all my concentration. Max really fucking stacked this thing before training. The first person view of my iron pumping athletic body was to die for. My biceps bulged and poked out of my arms as I thrusted the heavy bar into the air with loud monstrous grunts. The bar was heavy, almost too heavy, but my reps became steady and rhythmic as I benched over and over. I got so used to the workout that I let out quiet “fuck yeahs” as I heaved the bar up and down. A surge of stress and power coursed through my new strapping bod. It made my skin tingle, and the muscle in my chest began to ripple as I pumped the heavy iron. It made my dick the hardest I’ve ever seen. I put the bar back on its rest before I completely exhaust myself like Max had done when I found him. I breath deeply, and slowly run my giant hands around my brawny chest, rubbing the beads of sweat into my soaked, coated pecs. I lift my tank again to look at their nice, oiled texture. Fuck yes! I look down, past my rippling chest and tight abs to take a gander at my bulge. It was nice and big, filled with my throbbing girthy member.

I slowly reach my hands down to touch the monster, but before I get the chance to finally stroke my new play toy, I hear a knock on the door. Fuck, just when I was getting to the good part. “Y-yeah just a sec!” I bellow nervously as I pull up my shorts, trying my best to hide my giant erection. I pull the front of my shirt over my crotch to try and hide it and I answer the door. Aly steps back with a shocked expression on her face. “O-oh.” She mutters as she looks up and down my shredded, sweat covered body. “Did you forget about our walk?” Shit, I knew I was missing something. I forgot that I told her that I’d be ready around this time for our date. “Damn, sorry about that. Here, I probably stink huh? I’ll take a shower real quick.” My words seem kind of stumbled but my deep voice saves the conversation from becoming awkward. I begin retreating back into the room, almost closing the door until I hear her say “Or, you could just change out of your workout clothes and come now.” The way she phrased it almost seemed as if she was asking me. I could see her legs shifting, she almost seemed shy about her statement. It was cute. I flash her a grin before saying “Alright, give me a bit, I’ll be out.”

I change into my casual attire. One of my school wrestling shirts with the school’s mascot on the front and a different change of shorts. We meet outside and start our date. We walk around campus continuing conversation from previous nights, joking around and making connecting through nonsensical banter. I’ve never seen this side of Aly, almost like a partner. God I’ve wanted this for so long, and having a body like this was definitely a plus. We continue our walk around, eventually leading to a local park. For a moment we become silent. I feel like something was wrong so I stop staring at my surrounds and return my attention towards Aly. I catch her staring at my enormous bouncing pecs as we walk forward. She was totally checking me out. It even seemed like she walked closer to get a better view at my muscled arms and bursting chest. Catching her off guard like that felt good in a way. Luckily for me, she didn’t notice me looking at her, so I go back and stare forward. I catch her by surprise again, and wrap my large muscled around around her cute, slender body, and pull her against me. “Having a good time babe?” I ask her as I pull her in tightly against my powerful chest. Her face turns red in reaction. So adorable, a girl as great as Aly getting hot and bothered by my amazing body. I can’t help but grin. She looks up towards my dashing face and nods before smiling back towards me.

During our walk we stopped for food, caught up with a few of Aly’s and Max’s, I mean, my friends, and went out to see a movie. The whole time, I felt a bit embarrassed about my post workout funk. Time and time again I found myself lifting my deep hairy pits to try and gauge the smell of my body. Everytime I checked it was no good, and I began to sweat more and more as our date went on. I shook it off, trying to convince myself that she probably didn’t even notice it all that much. After the movie, it was pretty late and it had gotten pretty dark out. The outside was pretty clear, hardly another person in sight. It made me a bit uneasy so I made sure to press Aly against my powerful body once again in case I needed to protect her. She seemed tired, and clung to my body tightly. Her eyes seemed closed, and I caught her taking in my strong athletic scent. No wonder she told me not to shower. “You doing alright babe?” I ask her as she lies her head on my bulky left pec. “I’m fine.” She answers. Her voice seemed drained and as cute as ever. “Do you mind walking me all the way home this time, daddy?” My heart almost dropped after hearing her say that. Daddy? I didn’t know what to think about the pet name, but my cock sure did. I could feel my shaft growing thicker as the word resonated throughout my muscled being. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. The word replayed in my head in her soft, soothing voice. I really, really liked it when she called me that. That same cock grin spreads across my scruff, masculine face before I say “Sure babe, anything you want.”

After a few more minutes of walking, we find ourselves finally standing in front of her dorm. She lifts her head off my beefy chest and before I can let out my ‘goodbye’, she stares deeply into my eyes. Her eyes shine brightly and I look back into hers. I never noticed how pretty they were. I lean down and kiss her deeply. We lock lips, and I can feel my dark, scratchy stubble tickle her face, but she doesn’t seem to mind. She wraps her slender arounds around the top of my large, rounded shoulders and pulls me forward. I follow her lead, eventually pinning her to her front door. We kiss more and more before we both pull back to catch our breath. That was my first time kissing a woman. Before the merge, I was bisexual, but I never had the opportunity to experiment with another girl. Locking lips with Aly was hotter than anything I could ever imagined. My heart began to race and I let my urges take over. “I want you so bad.” I whisper close to her face. My gruff voice sounds deeper than ever, and I can see her biting her lower lip. Seeing her pose so cutely like that drove me crazy. And what she said next drove me even crazier. “You’ll have to wrestle me into submission then, daddy.”

The chains were off, I kiss her wildly, I couldn’t stop myself even if I wanted. She kissed back almost as urgently, like it was the last of her life. She fumbled with her keys and unlocked the door and let us inside. She pulls away and closes the door behind us before playfully pulling me towards the bedroom, guiding me by grabbing my giant hands, now slightly sweaty hands. We kissed periodically before finally reaching the foot of her bed. She begins to resist my pull, playfully teasing me, testing my raging lobido. We laugh together and I grab her by her waist and I fill my giant palms up with her amazing ass. I grope her butt a bit longer, savoring it’s soft, squishy feel. God, no wonder guys loved butts so much, this feels amazing. I slid my body against hers and I gently push her onto the bed and she falls with a slight giggle. She bites her finger, and looks straight at my face, wearing the hottest pair of “fuck me eyes” that I’ve ever seen on a person. “Mmmm is daddy all nice and hard for me?” she says biting the tip of her finger. Her pose gave off a sexy, cutesy aura that I found irresistible, the question almost didn’t even resonate with me at first. I would’ve completely forgotten about my dick if it weren't so rock hard at this point. Even the daddy talk had me lost for a second.

I do my best to shrug off my confusion before snapping back to my hunky personality. I give her a nice toothy grin before pulling down the front of my shorts, revealing my throbbing bulge to her. “Of course I’m hard for you babe. You’re so fucking sexy.” I pull off my shirt, showing off my glimmering, statuesque chest. I remembered how much she loved my huge muscles, I bounced my pecs effortlessly to add a little flair, she really, really liked that. I was glowing with confidence, and this body was certainly backing me up. “Mmm Max” she moaned as she ran her hands down her curvy body. “I want your fat cock.” She pulled off her pants, showing me the cute underwear she was wearing underneath. She pulled them off slowly, she crossed her legs to cover her naked crotch. She smiled smugly, knowing that I was lusting for the goods that she was hiding between her curvy thighs. Once her underwear slide completely off her legs, Aly spread them wide, revealing her pussy towards me. I’ve been thinking of this for so long, seeing her like this in person seemed almost unreal. Her lips were pursed together and seemed moist to the touch, god she looked so fucking tight. Seeing her legs spread open just for me was such a sight to behold. I’m so glad that I have a cock right now, the scene wouldn’t have looked nearly as amazing if I was still in my old body. My eyes widen, and I pull down my briefs quickly and show her my heavy erection. I gripped my cock firmly in my meaty hands, stroking my thickening shaft as I stared into her eyes, giving the same “fuck me” expression that she gave me earlier. I grab each of her thighs and lift her legs in the air. A soft “Ooooh” resounds from her lips as I raise her legs. I pin her against the bed, being firm, while still remaining gentle with her. I press my chiseled body against her, pushing my burly, naked chest against hers while I slowly move the tip of my cock between her soft, wet lips. She bites her lower lip again, moaning softly as I teased her sensitive lips. “Does that feel nice babe?” I ask confidently, but on the inside, I’m still unsure about what I’m doing right and wrong. “Oh yes daddy! Your cock feels so good against me!” she exclaims before wrapping her hands around the size of my biceps. “Your arms too.”

I look towards my arms and begin flexing them, letting my biceps bulge against her sexy, petite body. She began to shudder underneath my slabs of raw muscle, I loved watching her shake in excitement. I flexed my arms against her, and puffed out my burly chest, pushing my bulking pecs against her body, while still edging my cock inside of her vagina slowly. She began moaning over and over, she couldn’t get enough of my athletic physique, but I’m just getting started. I push my hips into her and finally, my cockhead bobs into her pussy. Damn she was nice and tight. The hug of her pussy squeezed my tip incredibly well, the pleasure was indescribable. My breaths became unsteady and I push on. I slowly, gently, sink my cock deeper into her tight, wet, little hole, feeling her squeeze my massive, thickening shaft. My the time I was completely inside her, I was at full mast. I could even feel her walls tighten and rub against the veins that riddled my thick shaft. I moan deeply and exclaim “Fuck babe. You’re so fucking tight. Just for daddy.” I stir my hips, thrusting my cock in and out of her body, building up a rhythm as I hump her tight, naked body. “Mmm yes Max” she moans as she wraps her arms around my rippling, muscled back. “Just for daddy.”

I press more against her body, her petite frame begins to shake violently as I begin pounding her tight hole faster and faster. I grunted heavily as I fill up her amazing pussy. It’s hug felt perfect for a girthy cock like mine. Her moans fill the air. They’re so soft and cute, they only fuel me to pump her harder. “Fuck yeah babe. You love this don’t you? Being pumped by such a thickset stud. You’ve probably dreamed of this since the day you saw me huh?” I say firmly while pumping her full of my thick, aching shaft. She shakes as she slides up and down my shaft. She’s progressively pumping on it faster and faster. It’s become nice and slick from her juices as I pound the fuck out of her. “Y-yes daddy! I love you cock so much!” she screams as I ram her against the bed, still pinning her down with my overpowering muscles. I pull my chest up a bit and wrap my arms around her body with ease, and begin pulling her up towards me while still thrusting my cock into her over and over. I once again press her chest against mine, and begin licking and kissing up the length of her neck soft. I touch her delicately with my monstrous hands while fucking her nice and rough with my veiny, muscular rod.

I begin thrusting into her tight pussy faster and faster, slowly edging on her walls hugging my cock. I lean forward and whisper into Aly’s ear, “You’re mine now. No one’s taking you away from me.” She moaned loudly, progressively getting louder and louder as I used all of my athletic strength to pound and stretch her hole. Deep and deep I push into her vagina, stretching its walls while savoring the warm, massaging squeeze of her hole. “Deeper daddy! Deeper! I want to feel you bust inside of me!” she screamed desperately. My eyes shoot open. I’m almost ripped away from our coiling form as her pleas ring throughout my body. My first time blowing my load as a guy, and I get to let it all go inside of Aly’s tight hole. I’m overjoyed and eager to milk my load inside of her. Then, I suddenly notice. She’s cumming all over the length of my massive shaft. I can feel her hole coating my vibrating cock even more heavily now. Her body twitches and convulses wildly and I pump relentlessly. Her mounds become muted, and suddenly, a sharp moan resonates throughout my hunky figure. Her pleasure was so apparent and overwhelming that it gave me goosebumps even while I continued to pump her tight hole.

Her pussy starts to contract and clench down my shaft, milking my cock even harder. I use all my stamina and start pumping her deeper with every stroke. I’m ramming her so hard that the bed is bouncing up and down violently. I bunch my biceps and meat covered forearms around her body and I press my swollen chest and pecs against her breasts. I tighten my abs and press them against her stomach as I reach as deep as I can on my final stroke. I kiss her passionately, silencing both of our moans as my cock spews ropes of hot cum deep inside of her. I can feel my seed seeping out of my cock head and coating her walls all over. I stop kissing her to let out a loud moan that resonates throughout the entire bedroom. Once we both catch our breath, I pull out and watch a stream of my seed flow out between her lips. It was so hot and satisfying, like a mark, proving that she was mine, and mine alone. Afterwards, we lie down next to each other, exhausted from our hot session. She turns over, facing her back towards me, and I use my big strong arms to pull her closer again my chest. I kiss her on the cheek and say “Good night babe” before drifting off in the best night’s sleep that I’ve ever had in my life.

Let me know if you like, I have a lot more of these since they’re personal stories. Not sure if too many are interested in F2M or M2M Merge. I have stories that are both gay and straight in terms of end relationships too.

#F2M #Possession #Merge

[ccntactus]

a dumb list of little dumb ship moments for @thatisnotmynature​‘s thor and this fuckin goober ezra

the first time he tries to make dinner by himself he messes it up. he works himself up over it and by the time thor comes in ezra’s sitting on the floor hugging bear and crying, why does he say he’s crying? “even bear didn’t want to eat it.”

ez being an idiot and literally planning a movie night to see what in movies trigger his panic attacks and thor having to explain to his adorable idiot boyfriend why this is a bad idea

ez deciding to teach himself first aid related things, so he can help when thor comes home banged up

ez having to comfort thor at night because for once thor is the one having the worse nightmares

ez keeping one specific notebook very private, when thor finally sees inside it’s full of drawings of thor being soft with bear or with other avengers

the realization that ez himself never appears in any of his drawings, when asked why he just shrugs

walking together in the snow, ezra being the pet-dad that gets bear little boots and a sweater and takes a million pictures because he thinks bear is the cutest thing ever

ezra getting a retail job and his coworkers absolutely losing their shit the first time thor shows up when they leave the store after 10 pm when ez works a closing shift

the confidence boost when ez realizes how big a deal thor is to people (seeing as he’s probably the most easily approachable one?) and realizes that thor sees him as important

super awkward “i want you to meet my parents” dinner where ezra just pokes at his food and tries to join in conversation but can’t follow things too well when they turn to more asgardian affairs

the conversation of “Stark called your brother a twink, so I looked it up and what do you mean I’m smaller than him? Am I a twink too?” upon hearing someone mention that if they want properly fitted clothes for ez quickly then they probably have to “take in some of Loki’s old things”

the super awkward first time meeting frigga and ezra full on flinches when she touches him because all he’s thinking about is his own mother and how scummy a person she is and that’s tainted his mental image of what mothers are like

the moment later once he’s explained this to thor and he ends up hugging frigga himself by the time they’re going to go back to earth

thor being a good dominant partner and taking the time to explain things to ez and promising him that he’s not weird for liking the things he likes in the bedroom

ez feeling like he can trust thor enough to explain why he doesn’t think he could ever be the dominant one in their relationship, even if it’s just for a night

the inevitable “i’m broken, aren’t i?” “yes, but i love you anyway” conversation

（✿ ͡◕ ᴗ◕)つ ✫・* ✫・*  their super soft and loving aftercare routine

the first time they see each other in formal dress (earth)

the first time they see each other in formal dress (asgard)

the fact that they’re on a walk with bear when thor proposes

the faCT THOR PROPOSES IN THE FIRST PLACE

first time ez is able to have a normal routine check up in medical

the fact that until he gets to that point, thor tries to be there for him during as many medical things as possible after sam gets them to do exams and any needed treatments in a neutral room that doesn’t give him the memories of hydra

ezra deciding to go through therapy and maybe even take medications to help with his issues, being pleasantly surprised when thor doesn’t seem to hate the idea

those little moments during kink that are so soft and intimate and just purely loving even with the kinks involved

whenever ezra has a hard time putting what he went through into words during therapy, he draws the scene instead. but the first time thor sees those drawings

ezra voluntarily going through medical and science things to be able to control the psychometry, despite the fact it’d bring back traumatic memories, just so he can hold thor’s hand without having to wear his gloves

ezra stroking thor’s hair or beard once he’s able to turn the psychometry off

（✿ ͡◕ ᴗ◕)つ ✫・* ✫・* hand holding when they can tell each other is nervous

while preparing for their wedding, ezra trying so hard to take care of as much as he can that he starts to grab a throw pillow and kneel on it at thor’s side regardless of whether or not they’re in the bedroom cause he just needs to take some weight off his brain

the conversation about previous experience and the overwhelming relief that with no privacy in hydra nobody was able to prey on ezra in a sexual manner

ezra embarrassed by the fact he’s 20 and has never even been kissed

first time having sub-drop and thor being so damn good at handling his soft broken boyfriend

them deciding to date in the first place? no idea how that initially goes down but i love it

ez learning about affection through thor

ez’s soft side coming out more as he learns to trust thor

ez managing to make breakfast in bed for thor at least once

stay-in-bed-all-day-comfort-cuddles when ezra has one of his headache days

（✿ ͡◕ ᴗ◕)つ ✫・* ✫・* thor having to lean down to give ezra forehead kisses

#ooc #thatisnotmynature #i aimed for 30 btw

[marvelous-imagining]

Lost

MASTERLIST

Request: I saw that requests are open and I was hoping you could do a song fic with Bucky or Steve (which ever you feel more comfortable with) using the song Lost by Chance the Rapper ft. NoName. I'm just obsessed with this song and I can't help but imagine anyone but you doing it justice!💖  

A/N: This one is... dark. I don’t know if the lyrics were meant to seem this dark but... my mind went there, haha. So, hope you like this! Sorry for taking so long, I was actually having a hard time figuring out where to begin, how to continue... But when I finally started, it was hard to stop. I needed to get everything down at once and I did. It’s a little all over the place but I wanted to stay true to the song and not add too much stuff. Again, hope you like this one! 

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Words: 2,356

Warning: angst, drugs, mentions of sex, dysfunctional family relationship, some strong language... anything else? 

Damn I'm in so deep Probably cause you're empty You can't even speak Damn your mouth so minty  

When Bucky had first seen you, he hadn't known how utterly fascinating you were. It wasn't until you two had ended up hooking up a couple of times that he got to know you. He was absolutely mesmerized by you.

He wasn't sure what it was that made him to become so engrossed in you. Maybe it was the way you let him in so easily. You let him see the parts of you that you kept hidden from everyone else. You shared so much with him and let him see just how damaged you had gotten throughout your life. Maybe that's what really intrigued him about you because he didn't feel so alone with his own troubles.

He knew all your deepest, darkest secrets and you knew some of his, though not every single one of them. He had gotten to know you and found out just how empty you were on the inside.

Whenever you were in a worse state than normal, you'd call him up. He knew you wanted him to help you through whatever you were going through but he couldn't really give you emotional support or any support for that matter.

The only way he knew how to help you was to make you forget about everything for a while. The way he knew he'd get to completely captivate your mind and focus only on him was to really make you feel something, feel him.

He'd give you himself, let you focus all your attention on him and forget about all your problems. He'd get something in return too. While he helped you out, he got to feel your gentle touch on his skin and your minty lips on his.

And boy, did he love it.

Ooh your mama hate me Daddy wouldn't let you if he ever met me If he ever met you Put that shit behind us And put this in your sinus Mine is all up in my gums Minus all that shit it's lined with

Bucky had first-hand experience on the problems you had with your family. He had met your mother a couple of times when she'd come to visit you. You never wanted her to, you were in bad terms. All she ever did was bring you down, complain and scold. She'd sometimes see him around you and with her motherly instincts kicking in, told him to stay away, told you to get rid of him. She hated him, she really did. She said he wasn't good for you, he was just bad influence.

She would remind you, one way or another, that if your father met Bucky, he would do anything to keep him away from you. That's when you'd lose it, scream at her and tell her that your father wasn't around. He had left years ago and it was something you never got over and your mother reminding you of him wasn't helping.

When you would let her have a piece of your mind, she'd only get angrier. A yelling match would start, you'd say hurtful things, you'd curse her out and say you never wanted to see her again. She still always came back and it would be pretty much the same each time.

Whenever you'd finally get rid of her, Bucky would be there for you. He'd shush you if you were getting worked up, yelling or crying about how terrible your mother was. He'd tell you the two of you could put that behind you, forget it. Sometimes, if you wanted or seemed like you needed it, he'd let you have the occasional kick of cocaine.

He knew it was wrong and it could be fatal if the usage of the drug was taken to extremes but...

Sometimes he'd need it too.

I say oh oh oh ohh You been scratchin, you been fiendin I'm a fix you, I'm a fuck you I'm a get rid of them demons  

If he noticed you've been taking more drugs, showing signs of craving that sweet release of being high, he got worried.

He'd notice it in your face too, sometimes he'd see you looking through all your cabinets and closets, even Bucky's pockets. He'd notice you running your hand over your face in distress and tug your hair. He'd keep looking at you until your gaze finally met his.

He'd shake his head, not in disappointment as you'd always think at first. All you had known your whole life was how it felt to disappoint someone and even when you thought Bucky was disappointed in you, he always proved you wrong.

Instead of being disappointed, he wanted to help you. He genuinely did. Too bad he didn't really know how to. He knew your inner demons were bothering you, he wanted to do anything he could to help you but he only knew one way.

The only way he knew how to silence your demons was make you scream louder than them. That was accomplished by burying himself between your legs.

My druggy Love me When I'm ugly Hug me When I'm bummy, scummy I'm your hubby Let's get lost, let's get lost    

While he was helping you, he realized you had been helping him as well. He realized he needed someone to be there for him and although he didn't really share much, he knew you were there for him. He needed to have someone to rely on and that was what he had when he was with you.

He felt wanted whenever you were around. He felt cared for even if he had a bad day or had doubts about himself. When he'd feel like a monster, you'd be there to hold him like he was the only person in the world you cared about.

When you held him like that, so kind and no sexual motive behind your actions, it's when he wanted to stop the time, freeze it. He just wanted to stay in that moment forever and get lost in your comfortable embrace.

Damn I need a minute... aight lehgo She fell in love, it fell apart... aight let go She met her match, I let her match She lit her match, she let me smoke

The two of you weren't really dating, you weren't exclusive at least by an agreement. Neither of you really slept around, you two relied on each other too much. You couldn't really live without one another, at least you didn't try to but when feelings started to develop on your part, it scared Bucky.

At first you wouldn't admit you had feelings for him but Bucky saw right through you. It really did scare him, you two were close to falling out. That night you ended in bad terms, there was a lot of yelling and pouring your hearts out. After both of you had had enough, Bucky had left, slamming doors.

It didn't take long until you caved in. You called him up, asking him to come over. He didn't really put up a fight. He came to you whenever you asked.

You believed you had found something special in Bucky. You believed he was a good match for you if not a perfect one. You were so devoted to him even if you had doubts whether he felt the same way towards you. You didn't want to let him go and he didn't seem to want you to either.

Without even intending to, you gave him everything. The minute he stepped through that door again, you knew you'd do anything to make him stay. He was your one true match, whether you were his or not. It didn't seem to matter to him, though, he just went along with it, got something good out of it himself.

Yeah me mad petty, Yeah me bogus Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah me know Yeah she knew too, it made her love it Her pussy like me, her heart like fuck it  

Sometimes Bucky would be so unbelievably frustrating and he knew it. He was misleading sometimes, not as genuine as you would have wanted him to be. Sometimes you would ask him to come over and he'd suggest a time that fit his schedule. You'd look forward to him coming over at the exact time, maybe half an hour later but then he'd show up hours later.

Finally when he'd come to your place, you'd be fuming mad. You'd tell him you've had enough of his shit, tell him to get out. He'd just roll his eyes, tell you that you're no better.

You'd find out he came later than promised because he was still mad about something you had said or done. He was petty, although he disagreed.

You'd start a yelling match, fire rushing through you as your heart started beating with anger. You'd call him out, you'd say some hurtful things and he'd do the same.

After a while of yelling and you telling him you never wanted to see him again, he'd prove you wrong. He'd push your buttons just in the right way to change your anger into sexual frustration. He'd say just the right things to make you crumble and give in to your need for him.

Even when fighting, you still wanted to jump his bones and your heart was not doing anything to prevent you from doing just that. If anything, it was encouraging you to do it.

So dance for daddy like Gator Ain't no partners on this trip And lose yourself in my room And find yourself in my grip I'm sayin

You were like a puppet on a string that was in Bucky's control. He knew he had you under his control, wrapped around his finger.

He somehow had managed to keep you along his side without defining your relationship. You weren't a couple. Even though you were in this together, you still weren't considered to be together. You knew you'd always be alone even if he was around because he wouldn't give in and make things official.

Again, you didn't care. You'd always somehow wander to his arms as if it was the safest place on earth. You could be upset with him but the second you'd fall into his embrace, it was a lost cause. You'd lose yourself to him, to his grasp.

You'd do what you always did; have sex until both of you were too exhausted to continue. And as you'd lie in bed, thinking through what had just happened, you'd be reminded of the way Bucky would always prove you wrong during arguments. He'd always say you'd be crawling back to him even if you told him to go to hell. He was absolutely right.

The whole things was a huge "I told you so" smacking you in the face.

I blessed myself inside your arms one day Swear to God there I was when the dress And the Silver buttons fade away Miss Mary Mattress, geriatrics Fuck me into open caskets, I wanna die with this

No matter how sad and defeated you'd feel after he'd proven you wrong, being wrapped up in his arms would always feel like a blessing. Being there, watching his face closely as his brows would furrow in the moment of pleasure was something that would always make it all worth it.

You'd beg him to finish what you two had started, swearing to yourself that you were happy. He'd do just that, leaving you withering on the soft mattress, wrapped up in the sheets.

You'd lie there, silent, listening to his soft breathing while he slept peacefully. You'd have a hard time falling asleep, thinking about everything that came to your mind. You'd think about the night, how you had felt before and you'd sigh sadly. Nothing could ever make you feel as alive as being with him would. You'd rather fuck him into oblivion and exhaust yourself than to be left without his touch and only your own thoughts as company.

I wanna stop seeing my psychiatrist She said "pill pop, baby girl cause I promise you, you tweaked The empty bottled loneliness, this happiness you seek"  

Sometimes your days could get so bad that you'd wander to your bathroom in the middle of the night, feeling empty inside. Sometimes when Bucky wasn't there to stop you or make you feel something, you'd turn to the comfort of some pills. You'd take too many anti-depressants, pop the pills multiple at a time and hope you'd suddenly feel better.

You were looking for happiness in the pills but all you'd get was a feeling of your head being lighter and your eyes opening and closing over and over again. The pills made you sleepy. So sleepy, it was hard to stay awake, almost impossible especially after taking too many of them.

Sometimes just as you were falling asleep, you just wished you wouldn't wake up to another day.

The masochism that you preach Practice back flips, tragic actress On a movie with no screen When the only time he loves me is naked in my dreams  

You'd most likely feel embarrassed and hurt after whatever happened with Bucky. For some reason, you still enjoyed it, being with him. You were quite sure you were only enjoying the feeling of him but you had gotten so used to how it all made you feel, sad and humiliated, you'd sometimes even enjoy that as well. You'd still feel the pain but whatever Bucky was a part of, you enjoyed.

Even though you knew he saw right through you, just how exhausted and calloused you were, you'd still sometimes pretend to be happy. You'd act as if nothing was wrong although you knew you couldn't hide your true self from him.

You were doing it for yourself mostly, not him. You tried to make yourself believe you were happy with your life, with him and the 'love' he gave you...

Because deep down you knew the only time he was in love with you was in the bedroom, when you'd give him what he wanted and what you believed you wanted too.

But you knew, even then that 'love' he felt for you was only a product of your daydreams.

Want to be on my tag list?

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#bucky barnes #bucky imagine #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky #bucky barnes imagine #winter soldier #winter soldier x reader #winter soldier imagine #mcu #marvel #mcu imagine #marvel imagine #angst #chance the rapper #song fic #lost #sebastian stan

[twentyonepilots-imagines-etc]

Introduction

Imagine you’re best friends with Jenna, and she introduces you to Josh.

(Beware, this one is longer than Passed Out)

You laughed as Jenna pulled her face away from her glass of milk to reveal a milk mustache. Her eyes widened as she saw you laughing at her, concerned that she had done something wrong. She then wiped her hand across her lip and laughed when she pulled it away with milk on it.

You two were having a girls night (just like every other Saturday, because Saturday’s were for the girls too) and Tyler was off with one of his buddies as well. You and Jenna had been best friends since your Freshman year of High School. You hadn’t had any friends yet, and she felt bad for you, so she “took you under her wing”. You hit it off and had been best friends ever since.

“So let’s talk boys,” Jenna said mischievously. She leaned with both elbows on the island you were sitting at in Jenna and Tyler’s new home. You rolled your eyes playfully at her before she continued. “Tell me about how it went with Brian last night.” She said with curious eyes, trying to absorb every sign that something went good or bad from your expression.

You laughed at her pressing manner but continued anyway. “I’m not exactly sure. The date went well, but it was afterwards that something felt… off.” You said, opening up to her.

“How so? Did he seem unattracted to you, or what?” She questioned concernedly. You shrugged.

“I don’t know. All I did was tell him that he couldn’t come inside because I had plans the next day. Which, obviously wasn’t why I wouldn’t allow him inside.” You said jokingly. You didn’t like the idea of having sex on the first date, and you were a virgin, as a matter of fact.

Jenna chuckled, because she knew both of these things. “Well that’s probably why then. He wanted to ‘do the do’ with you.” She said with a dimpled grin. You rolled your eyes again and blushed at the thought, causing Jenna to laugh again. She leaned back in the stool-chair that sat at the marble island, the pressing manner gone.

You sighed. You’d had a crush on Brian for months. He was your coworker at the record shop you worked at, and after months of hopelessly crushing on him, he finally asked you out. He took you to a drive-in movie where he did try to make a move at one point, resting his hand on your upper thigh. You squirmed under his calloused palm, but did nothing. When he tried to ease his fingers up your shorts, you laughed at him and swatted his hand away. He’d just stared at you and proceeded to go back to watching the movie. At your door when he dropped you off, he kissed you sloppily and asked if he could come in, and that’s when you awkwardly rejected him. He then pulled away, and said goodnight. You haven’t heard from him since.

You really thought he was gonna be “the one”, but it turned out that wasn’t the case. You’ve never been in a relationship where the guy you were dating wasn’t a pig. They always ended up using you for sex (failing, obviously), cheating on you, or being either physically or emotionally abusive.

“God, Jenna, I would do anything to have the relationship that you and Tyler have with each other.” You said wearily, laying your head down on your arms which were folded and resting on the counter. You felt exhausted. Why can’t you find someone? Were you not good enough?

You felt a hand rub up and down your back comfortingly. “Hon, it’s okay. You’ll find someone. I promise, (Y/N).” You sat up to meet the gorgeous blue eyes of your best friend, to see them staring into yours with empathy.

“You really think so?” You asked, sniffling, although there were no tears.

She smiled reassuringly. “I know so. Actually, I kinda wanted to talk to you about that.” You nodded.

“I know someone who I think you’d get along with well.” She said hopefully. You smiled at her; she was such a happy person, and anytime you were around her, you felt happy.

“Who? Is he nice?” You inquired. You knew very well that she didn’t hang around people who were mean. She stopped hanging out with them the moment they showed any signs of being rude or hateful. You didn’t even know why you asked the question.

She raised her eyebrows and smirked at you because you both knew that she doesn’t hang around people who make her feel bad about herself. You both chuckled a bit before she answered.

“His name is Josh, he’s Tyler’s best friend, and they play music together. He’s really nice and pretty attractive.” She said, listing his good qualities. Of course, Brian was attractive and all that, and you thought he was nice at first but… that didn’t work out.

You took a playful pause before talking again. “Go on,” you said with a deepened voice to make her giggle.

“He has bright yellow hair- we like to call him ‘Dunshine’ because his last name is Dun, and his hair is bright like the sun.” She smiled. You chuckled.

“Anyway,” she continued, “he has dark brown eyes and a really nice smile. And, although I still love Tyler, he’s got a really nice body. He drums in Tyler’s band and then runs on the side, so he’s really fit.” She said. You imagined what he looked like. But you’d never seen anyone with bright yellow hair before, so it was hard to picture him.

“He sounds nice.” You said, pondering what he must be like. It must be something great. “Does he know I exist yet or have you not told him about me?” You inquired, curious to know what his reaction was, if she told him about you yet. You also wanted to know what she said, hoping it was good, because you could really use a self esteem boost right about now.

She smirked at me. “Yes I did. He seemed very interested.” She said.

“What did you tell him about me?” You asked, trying not to sound too eager. But she could see right through you and laughed at your curiosity.

“Well, I told him that you’re really easy to be around, you have gorgeous eyes (which you do), you’re absolutely adorable, and that you’re smoking hot.” She laughed when she got to the last one. She was joking, but you knew she actually did tell him something along those lines.

You gave her a lighthearted shove on her upper arm and laughed with her briefly before asking more about Josh.

“So, what are his bad qualities?” You asked, knowing there must be a catch to a guy who sounded as great as he did, or at least, as great as Jenna was describing him.

“The only problem I have with him is that he’s always stealing Tyler from me!” She said with a silly “hmph” to make you laugh.

You giggled. You’d made your decision; you decided to ask her to introduce you to him sometime in the upcoming week. Maybe he’s a good guy.

~~~~

(Two days later)

You tapped your fingers on the table you were sitting at, alone, waiting for Jenna, Tyler, and Josh to arrive at the local diner you’d agreed to meet at. Your eyes were on your black converse that rested on the darkened and scummy red carpet of the diner, trying to distract yourself from your anxiousness.

You were very nervous, as this would be your first time meeting they guy who you’d asked endless questions about for a few days now, ever since Jenna just told you a couple things about him on Saturday. You just kept thinking about him, even though you had never met him. You were somehow crazy about him.

Every time the door at the front of the diner opened and jingled the bell on the door, your heart leapt into your throat, just at the anticipation of them finally getting here. This time, though, it really was them. You watched your best friend, her husband, and a very attractive man walk through the door. You blushed when you saw him; he was even more attractive than you had been imagining.

His eyes searched the diner, looking for you, until his eyes landed on you and your table at last, at the very back of the diner. When he saw you, his composure changed to an expression that looked like he was interested, and wanted to see more, which made you blush again. At least he seemed like he was as crazy about you as you were for him.

When he finally realized he was staring, he gave a shy smile and a wave. You gave a timid smile back, and wiggled your fingers at him in a hello from across the room.

Jenna pointed you out to the man at the front desk, and the man followed her gaze and let them in to get to your table that you’d picked out. The small group made their way to your table, and you stood up to greet Josh officially.

Up close, he was maybe 4-5 inches taller than you, and when he got close enough, you had to look up slightly to see his eyes. When you did look up, you saw him staring into your eyes as well.

You looked back at Jenna and Tyler to make sure they weren’t watching you two before you decided to begin a conversation with Josh.

They were enthralled in each other, of course, because they were the cutest couple in the universe. Since you’d been friends with Jenna before she met Tyler, you had always third wheeled them throughout their entire relationship, watching as they never lost interest in each other.

That’s what you wanted in a relationship. Always that thrill you get when you see your crush come around the corner. The butterflies when they rest their hands on your waist. The blush when you get complimented on how beautiful you looked tonight. And they just never lost that spark.

You finally spoke to Josh, looking at him with a small smile playing on your lips. “Hi! You must be Josh.”

He smiled back and you noticed his perfect teeth, gleaming white and straight, and you also noticed that when he smiled, he got little crinkles around his eyes.

“Yes, I am. And you must be (Y/N)? Otherwise, It’s kinda creepy that you know my name.” He said with a chuckle.

You laughed. “Yes that’s me. And, no, I’m not a stalker.”

“Oh well that’s good.” He said, looking into your eyes again with a fading smile. You both paused before you spoke again.

“Well, how about we sit down in this really, kinda low quality booth that I had specially reserved for our group?” You said in a sarcastic tone to make the brief moment of silence less awkward.

He chuckled and then made a gesture for you to sit down closest to the wall, ladies first. You grinned and shuffled into the yellow and red colored booth, and looked back to see Josh focusing on also trying to maneuver his way into the booth beside you. You watched as he struggled to fit in next to you without having to crush you into the wall (which, you actually wouldn’t mind…) and laughed when he finally got himself situated.

He gave a playful scowl followed by a grin, and the two of you turned your attention to Tyler and Jenna who were looking at you with an amused expression, waiting to have a conversation.

~~~~

The meal went great. You all talked about a number of topics, the main one being Tyler and Josh’s band. They’d just gotten back from their tour of your hometown, called Tour De Columbus. You hadn’t realized that they were twenty one pilots. You’d heard them on the radio all the time and you’d loved their music, but you had no idea that it was Jenna’s husband. You just never really looked into them (of course you would now).

Of course, though, you and Josh did get some alone time when Tyler and Jenna broke off into their own conversation. When you got the chance to be in your own conversation with Josh, you talked out the basics like favorites and life stories.

Your favorite part was when he started talking about how he began drumming. He said that he’d walk down to his local record store, and ask the toughest looking dude for an album recommendation, and then he’d buy that album, and use the drums in their store to practice/ learn how to play along to the music.

As he told the story, you saw him get passionate about it, and you knew it was a story that was close to his heart, and you loved watching him speak his mind.

He paused and looked at you with a shy smile. “Why are you looking at me like that?” He said.

You felt your face get hot when he asked this question, knowing that since it was only the first date, you can’t tell him something as romantic as 'I love watching your expression when you talk. You’re such an amazing person’.

“Uh, no reason. You were saying?” You stuttered. He hesitated before diving back into his story again.

~~~~

You stepped out of Josh’s car and into the humid night. It had been raining for most of the night, and it had just recently stopped. So, moisture + heat = humidity, which would begin making your hair puffy any minute now.

He closed the passenger door behind you. You turned back to make sure that he was following you up the driveway to your door; what gentleman doesn’t walk a lady to her door?

The two of you walked hand in hand to your front door, his thumb slightly caressing yours, giving you butterflies. When you reached your door, you turned to face each other like they do in the movies when a girl gets dropped off. And you decided to say the most cliche thing ever.

“Well, this is me.” You said with a smirk.

He chuckled at your cliche joke that most people wouldn’t haven’t gotten immediately. During dinner you’d talked about how you hated cliche endings in movies, and he surprisingly shared the same hatred for it.

And he had an even better cliche comeback; he moved his hand to the side of your face and gently holding your face, stroking your cheek, making you shiver. He moved his other hand to the other side, and he leaned in and you felt your eyes close, to be left with only the sensation of his soft lips touching yours lightly.

The kiss started out slow and light, but it escalated into a rough passion, his left hand moved to the back of your neck and your fingers lightly tugged at his yellow hair. You felt your face get warm from the ever escalating moment that you had caught yourself in.

Suddenly, he pulled away, and looked into your eyes with a hungry expression. You were both out of breath from the experience.

“Um… would you be okay if I uh… maybe uh came in?” He stuttered out nervously, his eyes roaming anywhere other than your eyes while he eventually got the sentence out.

You put you hand on his face to move it so that you were looking into each other’s eyes. You smiled reassuringly before speaking again.

“Of course you can.” You said with a slight seductive edge to let him know you were getting impatient.

He smirked and pressed himself against you as you unlocked your door, and you turned around to kiss him again. He picked you up, and you for some reason felt like it would be right to wrap your legs around his waist. As you walked into your apartment, you knew that this was the right person to do it with for the first time.

End.

~~~~

Hey there! I’m glad that I’m finally starting to get reads, as I’ve uploaded a few chapters on other social medias such as Tumblr and once or twice on Amino. If you’re reading this, I sincerely thank you for reading my content; it makes me feel better about myself.

I’m really sorry that this chapter was so long 😂 I was expecting it to be cute and short when I started working on it, but it ended up being almost 3,000 words.

Please like, comment, share, or just keep reading. It means a lot to me, and thank you again |-/

Word Count: 2802

#Jenna Joseph #Tyler Joseph #josh dun #joshua dun #josh dun imagine #josh dun fanfiction #josh dun smut #josh dun story #josh dun fanfic #josh dun fluff #josh dun imagines #twenty one pilots short stories #twenty one pilots imagine #twenty one pilots fanfiction #twenty one pilots fluff #jenna joseph imagine #jenna joseph fanfic #best friends with jenna joseph #twenty one pilots #twenty one pilots lyrics #tyler joseph fluff #tyler joseph fanfiction #tyler and josh #tyler joseph imagine #tyler joseph imagines #tyler joseph smut

[royreadingco]

Book Review #3: A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas

Welcome back to Roy Reading Company! Today, I'm very excited to be reviewing the second book in the "A Court of Thorns and Roses" Trilogy, A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas. This book was dense, a whopping 626 pages, but 626 pages of pure magic. If you read my review of A Court of Thorns and Roses, you'll know how blown away I was by book 1, but book 2 was even better!

*Warning: This review contains spoilers. Read at your own risk.*Right off the bat, what stood out to me about this book was the realistic depiction of emotions. The guilt and shame that Feyre felt was so described in such a realistic way, you could actually relate to her. The way Maas described Feyre's struggles, it almost seemed as if she was going suffering from PTSD, which wouldn't be surprising considering what she went through Under the Mountain. The physical symptoms, like her vomiting and intense nightmares, as well as her mental ones like her lack of interest in things like painting, suggest the degree to which her time Under the Mountain effected her. I felt that Maas did a really lovely job of making these symptoms true to life, and in an age where mental health awareness is super important, it was great to see Feyre work through these struggles. 

At the beginning/middle of the book, I found myself getting a little frustrated with Feyre in regards to Tamlin. Yes, Tamlin was not helpful at all in helping Feyre heal and recover. Terrible of him, that much is obvious. But while Feyre was in Night Court she seemed to only focus on how awful Tamlin was, and completely forget about all of the good times they had together and how much she loved him at one point. Sure, he may have been going through his own struggles, but they could have worked together to make each other better. But by the end of the book her hating Tamlin was totally justified. 

First of all, can we talk about how he only used her for sex? Props to Maas for actually including sex in a YA book, and it was impactful. Tamlin acted like he really only cared about having sex with Feyre, not helping her get better. Contrast this with Rhys, who was totally willing to wait for Feyre to be ready, and we have a pretty important message. Maas contrasts Tamlin and Rhys, to show that there's a difference between being in love and making love. He clearly didn't care about her enough to see that she was literally withering away in front of him, and didn't try to help her at all. Also, why did you not realize and accept that she was developing powers? Tam, you could have helped her hone her skills and become a more powerful fae. But know let's lock her in my mansion, right? WHICH REMINDS ME: How DARE you lock her in that house?! Who in the mother do you think you are? It's clear that he was so wrapped up in his issues and trying to protect her that he just lost it and turned into an oppressive maniac. He also tells her that there's no such thing as a High Lady, so she can't be seen as his equal. Utter. Crap. I think what hits me hardest is his history with Rhys and how he helped his father hunt down members of Rhys's family. Just scummy. 

Let's also talk about this wedding. That dress was horrible. It didn't even seem like Feyre cared about the wedding at all, she wasn't invested in the planning and didn't care enough to object when things bothered her. It was destined to fail from the start. Ianthe had wayyy too much control in the planning of this wedding, and made it something Feyre utterly didn't care about. I would have walked away too. 

Ianthe. The utter wraith that she is. Though I hated her guts, I can see her importance to the story. She was integral in Feyre's rise to power later in the series. But she is also really important in spreading a message about consent. Ianthe was notorious for taking advantage of people like Rhys and Lucien, and Maas uses her to show that consent is important. 

Now let's talk about Feyre's time with Rhys. When he first winnowed her away to Night Court, and let her heal, I knew he wasn't so bad of a guy. And when he did save her from Tamlin's insanity, I saw right away that he actually cared about her, despite his teasing and taunting. But even with his teasing, it opened opportunities for Feyre to be her spitfire-self again. I liked that he started by helping her learn how to read, and how to protect her mind, skills that would be vital to her. I did wonder that while Feyre was in Night Court, why did Tam never try to get in contact with her? He must have had some inkling. 

But I was really glad he didn't because I fell in love with Velaris, Rhys, Mor, Az, and Cassian. Mor, Az, and Cassian were way more open and honest with her from the beginning and actually offered to help her train and befriended her outright. Lucien wasn't necessarily a bad guy, but he never stood up to Tam's mistreatment of Feyre. The people of Velaris all made a conscious effort to make Feyre feel welcome and to help her feel better. I thought one of the especially touching scenes was when they were training with Cassian, and it dawns on her that she should have been one of the Fae to die in Amarantha's court, and Cassian helped talk through her emotions while Rhys reacted so strongly, and so kindly and telling her that she should never feel that way. It was evident that Velaris was a much healthier environment for her to live. 

While she was there she not only healed from her experiences Under the Mountain but was also able to grow into her new life as a Fae. She was able to be an active and useful member of Rhys's team and was able to help infiltrate Hybern's forces. 

I've spoken so much about Maas's world building, but I have to touch on her creation of the Illyrian culture. The customs and traditions that she developed were so interesting. To learn with Feyre about a whole other species was really interesting. From hearing about how they are raised and trained from an early age, to the treatment of their women was fascinating and really set Night Court apart from the other courts. Along the same vein, it was both heartbreaking and emotional to learn about Mor's past in the Illyrian legions. It helped me feel more sympathetic towards her and relate to her even more. 

I really liked that we got to go into Summer Court and Adriana. I am really intrigued by exploring the other courts and seeing their different cultures come to life is one of my favorite parts of this series. Paired with Feyre being able to tap into Tarquin's powers to help Rhys was really one of the first instances of Feyre actively helping to take down Hybern. 

I really loved the idea of a hidden city of Velaris, that no one knew about for hundreds of years. I loved that it was a sort of paradise or Eden hidden away from all of the horrors going on in the rest of Prythian. The word Velaris actually comes from the Latin verb to cover or to veil. I love significant word choice in books. The desctiption of this city was lovely, and the detail was phenomenal, and really brought the city to life. What was also really lovely, was how important Velaris was to Rhys and his family, how they wanted to hold onto their piece of private paradise to escape to. 

And now for the good stuff. 

Rhys and Feyre were a match made in heaven (literally). I thought for a long time that I would never want Feyre to be with anyone other than Tam, and boy was I wrong. From the moment he rescued her, to the teasing little notes that they sent each other, they were perfect. When he sent her into the Weaver's cottage to get the ring was such a sweet idea, and how it all tied into his family and their mating was so well done. Even their scenes in the Court of Nightmares and that little Illyrian inn were some of my favorites in this book. 

But what takes the cake, without any doubt, has to be the cabin scene. But first, why in the holy hell did the Suriel spoil the mate thing? If he knows ~most~ things, wouldn't he know that Feyre didn't know yet? So why would he spoil it? I'm glad he did because cute things happened. I can also understand Feyre's frustration with people waiting until they thought she was ready to hear the news, when she was so involved. But I wanted her to be a little more happy about it and not just be mad at him. I thought it was fitting that she just took some time for herself to be alone, to paint, and process everything. I also liked that he chased after her and made sure she was okay (something Tam never did). I (as I love the different culture and tradition) thought it was so sweet that offering him a meal is the signal that the mate bond has been accepted. 

Maas really showed her finesse as a writer, when all of the little instances that had taken place over time had connected and entwined to build their mate bond from the moment they met. To create such an intricate plot, that was so well executed is inspiring and that is how a true, sophisticated novel is written. The fact that Rhys was the one to send the lullaby to Feyre's cell under the Mountain took me by surprise because I had assumed that it was thanks to Tam. The whole mate relationship between Rhys and Feyre was so spectacularly done, I was blown away. Overall I could not be more satisfied with the way Maas portrayed the mate bond between Rhys and Feyre. 

Some final thoughts. In the end of the novel, I have one thing to say. TAMLIN YOU SUCK YOU PIECE OF SLIME. That is all. The mortal queens give humans a bad rep. What is Amren really? The significance of Rhys's knee tattoo was amazing. The slight undertones to the Hades and Persephone story were super cool, and I love Maas showed her literary prowess in basing her original stories on classic tales. 

In summary, I apologize that this review is so long but for such a lengthy book, how could I not? It would be an injustice to the book to leave anything out. I felt that this book was phenomenal, extremely well done and showed how sophisticated Young Adult literature can be. 

I give this book a 📚📚📚📚📚 out of 5. I would highly recommend this book to any YA lover, and it might have made the series for me. What did you think of A Court of Mist and Fury? Let me know in the comments!

If you enjoyed this please subscribe to get email updates for new blog posts! And feel free to follow our instagram and tumblr both can be found at @royreadingco If you have any suggestions for books you think I should read or bookish products I should try please leave a comment below or shoot me an email at [email protected]! Thanks for reading along with me! Happy reading! 

-

Kayla

#acomaf #a court of mist and fury #feyre x rhysand #feyre archeron #rhys #night court #sarah j maas #YA #High Lady of the night court #books #bookworm #bookish #book review #book blog #booktube #book tumblr

[dank-ships-blog]

I know I look crazy...

Alright I may look like a total psychopath but i really would like you opinion

@squirrellygirlart and @mr-hawkmoth 

Because you are me and my sisters idols I would really like your guys thoughts oh and sorry for basically online harassing you Squirrellygirlart    

Anastasia Au

(DISCLAIMER: They are not ladybug and chat noir)

Adrien has been in a orphanage for basically his whole life.

The King and Queen of England (Gabriel and Mama Agreste) are really sad because it’s been 15 years since their child went missing.

Adrien has the same first name though! And can speak english too

He had a lullaby he always remembered (Once upon a dream!!)

Con artist Plagg, his wife Tikki and their daughter Marinette are trying to find a fake Adrien Agreste to give to the family and get a reward

Plagg helped The queen and king escape when the kidnappers got into the palace when they took Adrien 15 years ago and took Adrien’s music box from the queen’s room (he was going to give it to her but they got split up.)

Plagg and Tikki go to jail for stealing money and they get caught so Mari is going to get the Ten Million Euro reward (DAMN) to 1) bail her parents out and 2) have more money.

She finds Adrien and convinces him he is the missing child.

Adrien has a cat named pooka and she comes along (to basically be Anastasia’s dog, if you have seen the movie.)

Her partner Rose Lavillant (yeah deal with it) helps ‘Train adrien’

He runs away with them.

When they get to London she realizes that Adrien is the REAL Adrien Agreste

Mari also realizes she is in love with Adrien.

Adrien finds out that Mari tricked him and thinks she thinks he is not the real adrien.

He gets mad at her and refuses to talk to her and only talks to Rose.

Mari convinces The parents to let Adrien see one of the royal family members.

Adrien meets Gabriel  late at night (like 11:30) in a guarder room in a separate house in London.

Mari argues with the king to see Adrien and gives him the music box.

“I’m done with seeing impostors trying to pull of as my son.”

“I’m no impostor sir! I am Adrien Agreste!”

“Enough with this!”

“Sir please! I am your son!”

“Do you think i’m some fool?!”

“At Least let me see Mrs. Agreste!”

“My wife is to fragile to meet another Imposter! When she found that the first boy who came wasn’t Adrien she was heartbroken!”

Gabriel goes to leave the room

Adrien starts singing his lullaby with the music box

A: “I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream

I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam. And I know it’s true that visions are seldom all they seem.But if I know you, I know what you’ll do You’ll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream”

Gabriel remembers that him and his wife sang that to Adrien every night before he was taken.

G: “But if I know you, I know what you’ll do. You’ll love me at once. The way you did once upon a dream”

AMAZING ADRIEN-GABRIEL VOCALS.

A + G: “I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream I know you, that gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam And I know it’s true that visions are seldom all they seem But if I know you, I know what you’ll do You’ll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream”

Gabriel hugs adrien

(Quietly) “You are my son”

Adrien meets His parents

TEARS EVERYWHERE

The king and queen offer Rose a job and she accepts

They offer Mari the reward money… but she doesn’t take the money.

“You sent for me, your grace?” Mari asked

“Ten million euros, as promised, and my gratitude.” The King said.

“I accept your gratitude, you highness, But I- I don’t want the money.”

“What do you want then?” The queen asks

“Unfortunately, nothing you can give.”

“Young woman, where did you get the music box? Your father was the man who saved us? Then you restore our son to us, yet you want no reward.”

“Not anymore.”

“Why the change of mind?” The king asks

“It was more of a change of heart…I must go.”

Adrien’s parents are like ‘Damn she hella in love.’

She leaves the room and runs into Adrien on the stairs.

“Hello, Marinette.” Adrien spoke coldly

“Hello.”

“Did you collect your reward?”

“My business is complete.’

“Uh, young lady, you will bow.. And address the prince as ‘Your Highness” the servant said

“No that’s not necessary” Adrien said

“Please” Mari responded “Your Highness i’m glad you found what you were looking for.”

“Yes. I’m glad you did too.”

“Well, then, good-bye, your Highness.”

“Good-bye” Adrien spoke quietly.

Mari goes to say bye to rose

“Well, if you’re ever in the scummy part of paris again, look me up.” Mari said “So long Rose.”

They shared a quick embrace

“Ah, Marinette… you’re making a mistake.”

“Trust me… this is the one thing i’m doing right.”

She goes to pet Adrien’s cat

“So long, cat.”

Pooka lets out a whine.

“I can’t stay. I don’t belong here.”

The epic Ball/party/dance starts for Adrien being found.

They are looking through the drapes.

“She’s not there.” The queen spoke to her son.

“Oh, I know she’s not– she, who’s not there mother?”

“A remarkable young woman… whose father found a music box.”

“No, she’s probably too busy spending her reward money as fast as she can.”

The queen looked off quickly before speaking again “Look at them dance… you were born into this world of glittering jewels, and fine titles, but I wonder… if this is what you really want.”

“Of course!” Adrien answered. “Of course it is. I found what I was looking for! I found out who I am, I found you!”

“Yes you did find me– and you’ll always have me–” She pulled Adrien into a tight hug “but is it enough?…. My darling, she didn’t take the money.”

Adrien pulled back, shocked “She-She didn’t?”

“Knowing that you are alive, seeing the man you have become…brings me joy I never thought I could feel again.” She said before giving him a kiss on the forehead.

“Whatever you choose,” The king said walking through the curtains. “We will always be a family.” He walked over to Adrien and kissed his forehead.

“Mother, father, can’t you tell me the–” Adrien turned around to see both of his parents had gone through the curtains, to the dance floor.

He looked through and took a step out, before stepping back.

He hears a noise and pooka hissing

He runs outside to see men with long metal rods ready to beat the living shit out of him, and probably kill him. (They were the guys who abducted him when he was a baby.)

Mari jumps out to defend Adrien and gets beat the shit out of, but the guys left injured.

“Mari” Adrien said flipping the unconscious (Probably dead) girl on her back.

“No.” he cried into his knees facing away from the girl

Mari groans as she gets up, Adrien gasps

He throws his arms out and accidentally slaps her lightly as he goes of a big hug.

“Ow! Let go, let go.” she said before falling back in pain

“Sorry. Sorry”

She groaned as she propped herself on her knees.

“I thought you were going back to paris?” Adrien asked

“I was.” Mari said

“You didn’t take the–”

“I couldn’t.”

“Why?”

Mari leans closer to the blonde boy. “Because… I-”

Adrien started pulling Mari into a kiss

Pooka meows with the crown around his neck.

“Oh…” Mari said before taking the crown off the cat’s neck. She holds in in her hands as she looks at Adrien. They both stand up. “They’re waiting for you.”

He take it from the dark haired girl.

JUMPPPPP CUTTTTTTTT

The king puts down the crown made for his son, picking up a note in a room full of guards and servants looking for his son.

Dear father and mother,

Wish me luck. We’ll be together in London again soon.

Love, your son, Adrien Agreste.  

The king passed it to his wife she read it over quickly

“Oh! They’ve eloped! Isn’t it romantic? It’s a perfect ending!”

The king smiled. “No. It’s a perfect beginning.”

The queen goes by his side as the gaze at the stars knowing that their son will be back.

ANOTHER JUMP CUT

Adrien (still in full prince attire) and Mari are ballroom dancing and then kissing (much to Pookas disgust) on a boat taking them back to paris, but just for a bit, they need to meet a lovely dark haired young woman’s parents.

Adrien picked her up (bridal style) and spun her in circles, Marinette couldn’t contain her giggles.

“Don’t worry London,” Adrien shouted out to the air “We will be back soon!”

Fin

_______________________________________________________________________

Someone goes back in time to make sure adrien’s parents never meet and he goes back to get them together Au

(DISCLAIMER: They are ladybug and chat noir)

Somehow an akuma gets time travel power (Like a time machine, not like time breaker)

They hate Adrien and are all salty and they’re all like “Ha Adrien Agreste i’m going back in time to stop your parents from meeting!”

Adrien and Mari (both transformed) (plus alya and nino cause the get sucked in for some reason) go back in time to 1986 (Both of his parents are 24)

And because the go back in time Adrien and Mari get EXPOSED (Because 16 years ago they didn’t have their kwami) and the gang freaks out for a bit and then adrien’s like “Yo i’m really happy Mari’s ladybug but the akuma kinda wants me dead.”

Adrien’s parents meet at a coffee shop when Gabriel was just a broke design student. (Mama Agreste’s name will be Mia for the sake of the woman having a name)

But the akuma messes it up and thinks that their work is done.

BUTTTT the squad breaks into a concert that Gabe and Mia are going to.

AND 80’S CLOTHES SO THEY FIT IN AND THEY LOOK FIERCE

Adrien notices that he’s slowly disappearing.

Mari, Alya and Nino go out into the crowd to try to push the two together

Adrien hijacking the finale performance.

He pulls a Brian in ‘Meet the Quagmires’  

NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWNNNNNNN NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOUUUUUUU

Mia and Gabe walk towards each other thanks to Nino, Mari and Alya’s coaching.

They first meet and Gabriel is like “I know this sounds weird but… can I kiss you?”

“Yes you may”

They leave the concert to go on a real date.

Adrien isn’t disappearing!!

Mari and Adrien kiss in the V-J Day in Times Square style and a photographer gets it.

Because the akuma fails they go back to their time.

Ladybug captures the akuma, blah blah blah

The next day they go to school the next day and they do modern history.

“And here class (on the projector) is a picture from 1986 that got famous for being an inspiration for Gabriel Agreste’s first very popular clothes line. As you see the three pictures are taken as the boy leans in for the kiss. As you can see this was also very popular because it was an interracial couple kissing very similar to the V-J day kiss.” AND ITS ADRIEN AND MARI KISSING BACK IN THE 80’S AND THEY ARE TRYING NOT TO FREAK OUT.

“Nino, Alya, Marinette, and Adrien do you have a comment about this photo?”

Alya dying laughing “No-no we, were good.”

The whole class is like ‘Wtf guys what’s so funny?’

The squad just giggles the rest of the lesson and almost gets kicked out like 70 times.

When class is over Adrien picks up Mari and just runs the fuck out

And is adorable. And everyones like WTF? What happened since yesterday like Mari couldn’t even talk to him and now the are like a couple???

And someone’s like “Hey that couple from the picture kinda look like Mari and Adrien”

Everyone: “…… Nah!”

Fin

#adrien agreste #miraclous ladybug #gabriel agreste #mlb #marinette cheng #alya cesaire #nino lahiffe #djwifi #adrinette #marinette dupein cheng

[beautifullybroken37]

Emotional Exhaustion

SO.. I’m not hearing anything from God. So I haven’t taken any actions or steps.. I’m not sure that I am in His will right now. This is so exhausting. When did life start to become so wearisome? I’m SO tired. I’ve overcome a lot of my demons fm my past... like just watching Intervention on tv brings tears to my eyes on certain ones because I so get it. I get what it feels like to be abandoned by your entire family. To feel that pain as a young woman. To struggle to let others too close to you now. To hate yourself.. everything about yourself, and you don’t even know why. Other people might compliment me sometimes or tell me nice things, but I dunno if I’ll ever be able to feel that way about myself.. I know what it is to feel like you’re never going to be good enough. To feel like you’ve messed up too much in life and no matter how hard you try, you’ll never get ahead, you’ll never be independent of your family again, & you’ll always just be a loser. Look how hard your parents worked so you could be successful & now look at you. A wasted investment. The girl that had so much promise but now everybody just looks at with pity. Some people will just never understand. People who haven’t been children of a broken home... I’m sorry, but you’ll never get it. People who haven’t felt the pain of abandonment...you’ll never get it. Hypothetically.. people who haven’t used prescription/drugs to get through certain times in their lives.. you’ll never understand the struggle. If you’ve never experienced real depression, don’t expect to even remotely understand. People who haven’t been drugged & raped by random guys or their friends’ scummy dirtbag nasty ass boyfriends.. it goes on and on, if you grew up in a normal family got married and have been a house wife/supporter most of your life & now you have an almost picture-perfect family and everything worked out for you, you will never have the hustle, fitness, wisdom, wealth, or success of a woman who grew up on the streets.. bc you just don’t have it in you.. you can try, but you can never do it like she can.. but you get the point.

Even if I’m nothing more than a total failure right now in the sense of my expectations for myself vs. where I’m at right now in life, I think all these things have made me a stronger person. Do I know my worth isn’t defined by my job, success/failures, or anything else? Absolutely. I learned that the really hard way... that was the worst ride of my life yet. What goes up, must come down. And coming down was fast and furious and hurt like a bitch. That job was my passion.. I loved the industry, the people, the company.. I just got lost. I let a breakup devastate me & leaned on prescription pills to help me throw myself into my work. I wanted to do everything there. I had so much go-go, so much passion, so much will to take that dept. and make it better in any way I could. There were so many things I never got to do or finish. I had a lot of plans for ways to make it be better.. my work was all I felt I had left until I healed fm that relationship, and I hated myself. A new guy came into my dept. shortly before our breakup & I didn’t realize it at the time but I was feeling alone & with him, the beverages, the fun, the food, it all flowed freely. It didn’t matter what I was, if I acted like I was 5 or was somehow annoying or whatever my ex didn’t like about who I was or what I wore or looked like or if I had a clump in my mascara or a tooth that wasn’t the same shade of white as the others or a little butt or a big butt.. I felt like he liked me no matter what. And at that time in my life, that really meant a lot. I have never been an alcoholic myself, but I had no business being in bars with a married co-worker. That wasn’t right & I wish I had known better at the time. Most of the time we were in a group but still.. I just saw him as my best friend. I didn’t know any different.. I was in my 20′s and super stupid. I went from being the most timely person in college to the worst when I worked with him.. had I not been taking an rx for add I would have been such a better employee there. It really does matter who you hang with. Another lesson I learned, the hard way. And that enabling people, doesn’t serve them well in the long run, either. That work/life balance matters. But anyways, that drug was the tool I used to hammer my life & my bank account straight into the ground. I lost everything and I truly believe it’s because I was a lost soul who felt so worthless, but also bc it changed who I was. It’s my fault for taking it. I wish I never had. People don’t realize it but these things mess w/your body too... you may not feel it at the time bc it numbs you, but give yourself a couple years and you’ll realize things are not right. And it’s all your fault. Your fault for being a total dumb ass.

Ok so whoops.. kinda went off track there. Thank you mother PMS b/c feelings - tonight. Holy cow. Ah the monthly joys, lol. Back to what I was saying though.. my mistakes, my failures, even though I’m still not back on my feet.. I’m a fighter. These heartaches make you more resilient. God pulls us through things. Being stressed out every day, will have to help me one day. Or kill me. One or the other lol. Maybe it makes you stronger for later down the road. B/c it keeps me close to Jesus in a way that is entirely uncomfortable. I long for the day when I can be comfortable in life and have a relationship with Him in a much different way. I don’t know what that is, but I’m looking forward to that day. I picture myself finally feeling like I can breathe, surrounded by clear blue skies with the perfect white fluffy clouds and surrounded by beautiful water.. and just taking that time to be with Him in a new & different way. I am grateful today, yes. But the kind of grateful you feel when God works miracles. When God answers prayers in ways we can never understand or comprehend. I know I’m romanticizing this and that's bad too but a girl’s gotta keep the hope somehow. Lol. Ask and ye shall receive. Knock and I will answer. Come to me all who are weary, and I will give you rest.

I know I should just shut up and be grateful to have a roof over my head, food to eat, clean water to drink, hot water in my shower, parents that are alive and healthy, for friendships, for a job (even if it is emotionally draining and makes me so tired I literally don’t do anything much outside of it), I get all that.. sometimes the fact that I know that makes it even worse. Like I fight myself because I have feelings that aren’t what they’re supposed to be. They’re not pretty. Like so many people are just so much better than me because they’re all like oh be grateful, isn’t this great in your life and this great in your life or say things in a way that is clearly meant to make a point to me-- like I get it. Ok I’m not stupid. In fact a lot of people underestimate me bc of the situation that I’m in and that’s entirely frustrating too. Just bc you got married early in life and had kids and yadda yadda and you think you understand me b/c you went through something similar? I’m sorry but that’s not possible b/c you were married and I’m not & never have been. Or you didn’t bust your balls through college. Whatever it is. So that makes the situation entirely different, doesn’t it? I don’t want to feel this way, but I just have days where it’s really hard to be grateful and not want more for myself, ok? To deny this would make me a complete fraud. Does that make me a bad person? To want more for myself? To want to be able to have my own family, to choose who I will have Thanksgiving & holidays with, instead of still even at the age of 31 doing what mom dad and step parents put together for me? To want to have my own family where all my parents can come visit me for a change? Where I can serve them. Does that make me a horrid person? To have that want makes me feel like I am, terrible. To want to be able to have my own life? To want to get out of this town and this job.. to be financially independent again, if I’m not married or actually with someone... how selfish of me. To think that I could have that is probably just stupid. I was stupid in my 20′s and the 30′s really aren’t looking much better... lol. This is just how it is today. Not every day. Some days are easier than others & when I pms it’s just like all my insecurities come at me full force. I’m over it. Guys this is something you’ll never understand. Because estrogen. Lol.

People don’t become resilient because everything has always worked out for their lives. It just doesn’t work like that & I get it. Wisdom isn’t handed over.. you have to go through some serious shit to obtain that. You have to make some terrible mistakes. You have to get your heart broken time and time again. And then? Again and again and again. Your life has to fall apart completely when you least expect it. And it’s so not easy. Everything comes with problems. Everything does. And the grass is never greener on the other side.  

Now that I’m saved, I have dealt w/the guilt & shame of my past with the help of The Lord. He has given me the gift of eternal life. The greatest gift of all, to know that someday I will be in heaven with my Maker, where there will be no pain and no sorrow and where no one could ever love me more. Someday I will finally get to feel like I am at home. I’m blessed because I have the grace and mercy of my God, I have a forever Father, Friend, Love, Provider, Protector, everything I have ever needed and more --I now have In Him. And that gives me peace. In moments like these, it feels so good to know that. I’m an overcomer and I will keep fighting until it’s my time & He calls me home.

Now that I am older & can reflect back on things f/m my past, I can try to make better decisions in life. Now I can choose my own family for my future, people who choose me too. Outside of my parents and brother, I mean. People who have never left me. Everyone else I consider family or will come to, will be of my own free will and theirs too. Only that and nothing else. No more fake friends, no more fake family. Only real from here on out or nothing. I’m too old for anything else and I have no energy anymore.. so yeah, that’s that. Jesus take the wheel is my life anthem. Seriously. B/c I suck at life. Lol. So since I’m not getting anything from Him right now I’m just going to do what I can, whatever that is b/c there’s nothing bigger than Him and there’s no mountain He can’t move.. I just have to resist the devil and his lies, keep close to God, and keep my faith. Ya’ll it’s not as easy as it sounds but I am really trying. Even if I only post on here on my harder days.. at least I don’t affect anyone else this way & I get it out and get to move on. Tomorrow is another day.

[smokeybrandcompositions]

One Goddamn Weekend

Boy, did i have myself a weekend, man. SO. MANY. ISSUES. That ain’t even MY issue! Look, i get the attraction to crazy chicks. I do. The woman i love is a special kind of nuts. The thing is, though, she wants to be better. She takes steps to cope and heal. I understand it’ll never be good but it’s much better than it use to be. The pain never goes away, i know that from experience, but you learn to deal, if you want to deal. My brother’s chick? nope. Se flat out doesn’t WAN to be better. At all. She wants to spazz out, throw tantrums like a child, and then expect everyone to just ignore the fact she’s been intentionally destructive and console her shenanigans. It’s wild. Keep in mind, this chick is 19, legal adult.

Friday

Chick tried to actively convince me that my little brother, a kid i raised myself and her current boyfriend, dosed her with stimulants because he wanted someone to be awake with him. And she just sad okay. See, this scenario is faulty. My brother would never unknowingly dose someone with any thing because it’s a scummy ass move. He’ll share what he has with you if you ask, letting you know there might be a little extra in it because he’s not trying to go to jail. She rinks it and promptly stays up all day, after staying up all night at work. She also had to work that Friday night, too so No sleep for the wicked. i guess.

My brother is kind of the complex handyman now so he ha to run around all day getting stuff to fix things. This chick inserts herself into this situation because she can’t be without him for more than an hour without melting down. She immediately tries to take everything over because she’s kind of overbearing that way. This grates on my brother’s nerves and she takes it as a slight, like he’s not being attentive to her feelings. She’s literally interrupting his job. He gets back home, upset, but tolerates her as he fixes this house.

His friend shows up to take him to another kind of a celebration/birthday party for a cat we haven’t seen in a month because he’s been training as a firefighter. As he gets ready to go, she’s like, “Cuddle me for five minutes.” My brother said “No” because he was on his ride’s schedule. This turns into some ridiculous argument and she throws a tantrum. My brother leaves because who the f*ck wants to deal with a child, right? So she comes in and makes this MY f*cking problem. Literally yelling and crying an punching walls and sh*t. For hours. HOURS.

Eventually, my brother comes back to deal with this sh*t becuase i told him to come back and deal with this sh*t. So, instead of talking this nonsense out like a rational adult, She f*cking takes all of her anti-depressants and runs off toward the bridge. She’d rather kill herself than act like a goddamn adult. but not really. The entire time she was off running toward her great plunge, she kept looking back to see if anyone was following her.

No one was following her.

I’ve known this chick since December and in that time, i have personally talked her off of/picked her up from this suicide bridge 4 goddamn times. She’s not going to kill herself. She doesn’t have the heart to o it. This is all literally theatrics and emotional terrorism. The thing is, my brother and i, we don’t have emotions like that. I told her that when she first said she wanted to be with my brother. Literally sat her down and explained to her that we are not these other cats she’s dated. We do not care if you want to spazz out and act an ass. That sh*t doesn’t solve anything and it just makes you look like an asshole. So my brother leaves again. Blocks her calls. tells her to make a decision. SO she calls me. I literally tell her the same thing. When she realizes no one is biting, she comes home an tries to “throw up” these pills.

She didn’t throw-up an pills. Chick literally sat next to the toilet until she heard the volume on my TV come back on and then started wretched so loud it drowned out my TV. So i just turned it up. Honestly, i don’t think she took any of the pills. i confiscated the bottles and they were both pretty full but i digress. Who am i to call bullsh*t on someone’s suicide attempt.

Bullsh*t.

So she spazzes out all night. Literally didn’t get any sleep until the next morning. Missed work because i didn’t get enough rest over this chick’s nonsense. it was f*cking stupid. all night, man. My entire friday night was litstening to her sob about how my brother is the worst.

She cried to her best friend about it. Her ex-boyfriend (who beat and choked her regularly) about it. My brother’s best friend. Literally anyone who would listen? defamation on my brother’s name. It was f*cking ridiculous. All night. in between fits of ugly sobbing. and punching my walls. and breaking sh*t. All night, man. Which leads me into Saturday!

Saturday

My brother comes home Saturday morning and she storms out of the room. After screaming at him at the top of her lungs. my brother, sensing there is no sense to be had, goes to sleep. He takes offense to this and runs into the arms of a guy who she tried to f*ck before.

I wake my brother up to finish this job and ask where his chick is. He doesn’t know. She's grown. Assumed she’s doing adult things. Nope. She’s being as petty and childish as possible. Literally with his friends, salting his name. all goddamn day. My brother doesn’t care. Cat’s gonna shoot they shot. If she let’s it in, she’s not worth. If she doesn’t she’s a keeper. Simple as that. Not to this chick. She wants him to be violently jealous and fight his friends. Whom he’s known for DECADES. Over her. Come on, man?

So she comes home with an attitude. My brother decided to leave and take care of some other stuff. She sat here and stewed in her own stupid f*cking feelings. For hours. Hours. 10 o clock rolls around and she loses it. My brother has apparently been gone for 8 hours or some sh*t at this point and that’s just TOO much for her. HE was actually trying to get the car he bought her fixed and mobile this entire time, mind you, a fact which he told her. several times. Does this matter? nope. Straight nuclear, this chick goes.

From 10 pm Saturday night until 7 am Sunday morning, i sh*t you not, violent sobbing and tantrums. ALL. F*CKING. NIGHT.

In this time, an entire work shift, she spazzed out and blamed my brother for her depression spiral, shot self esteem, paranoia, the loss of her job, and various other things that are a result of her directly making stupid f*cking decisions. The logic gymnastics were amazing and stupid. She punched walls, broke bottles, and cut herself apparently. The performance was full of stupid and passion, i’ll give her that.

After a rocky start to Sunday morning, she calmed down a bit. i guess. i don’t know. i ignored her for most of the day. Couple hours pass, i think we good. Wrong.

Motherf*cking SUNDAY, man

Apparently there’s beef with some cat my brother knows. Threats were exchanged over the internet. chick is getting mad hype for no reason, like almost frothing at the mouth. Culminates into cats getting pulled up on. My brother asked me to drive him out to this cats job, to which i laughed in his face. F*ck no, i’m not doing that. the hell i look like? Eventually, the dude in question with the problem actively apologizes and squashes the beef. My brother agrees. Situation deescalated and done with. For this chick though? NOPE.

She’s DISAPPOINTED there’s no bloodshed. She’s mad at my brother for SQUASHING the beef. Motherf*ckers were threatening him with straight up maiming and murder and he took that situation down to 0 and she’s mad? the f*ck man??

Chick is literally running around here calling my brother a b*tch in so many words, questioning his manhood, disrespecting him in front of anyone in earshot. She’s on the phone with her friend, who has been abreast of the situation and is actively telling her to calm down, that she’s in the wrong, but nope. Her words, and i quote, “F*ck that, i’ll go to jail tonight! motherf*ckers forget b*tches is crazy!”

Like, the situation is over and she won’t LET IT BE OVER. My brother has fixed everything this chick f*cked up this weekend but she is just not letting it go. She’s not letting it stay fixed. Why?? Why won’t this just take??

Look, i get it. Mental illness is a motherf*cker. I know for a fact it is. I’m a high functioning sociopath with borderline personality disorder. Like, i could be an active serial killer if i wanted. I don’t because i check my crazy. i don’t want to be that person. I want to be able to function as best i can as a person. and that’s the key.  I don’t use my issues as an excuse to be reckless, disrespectful, and cruel. This chick though? this 19 year old child? nah. This chick is f*cking ridiculous and she’s unapologetic about it. Absolutely refuses any semblance of responsibility. I took her in to give her a solid place where she could grow and get better. she’s done everything in her power to turn that olive branch into f*cking splinters in ONE GODDAMN WEEKEND. ONE. GODDAMN. WEEKEND.