push shove, a little bruised and battered
Fandom: Kamen Rider Kabuto
Characters: Yaguruma Sou, Kageyama Shun
Song: "In Hell I'll Be In Good Company," The Dead South (playlist here)
They don’t treat each other gently.
Or rather, Sou thinks, I’m not gentle. He’s not sure that Shun is capable of gentleness either, but from him it seems different—a loss, rather than a choice. Maybe he never had that capacity in the first place, maybe it was lost at birth, but it still feels like something’s broken inside him.
It won’t be fixed. Sou doesn’t fix things anymore. It’s better to be content with brokenness.
They’re at a noodle shop, and Shun is staring into his bowl and not eating. He doesn’t look distressed, just…abstracted, fish cake held in his chopsticks as he contemplates its spiral. Sou lets this continue for a few minutes before saying, “Partner, you need to eat.”
Shun blinks slowly and says, “Oh, right,” and lifts the fish cake to his mouth.
While Shun’s chewing, Sou can pay attention to his own meal, cataloguing his critiques of the broth in the part of his mind that still cares about food as he eats egg and mushrooms and pork. Undersalted, could have simmered longer, their miso isn’t top quality—
He looks up, and Shun has stopped eating again, noodles halfway to his mouth, and is back to staring into the bowl.
Sou watches him for a long moment and then leans across the table, taps his cheek with one finger to get him to look up, and says, gently, “Partner. Eat.”
“Right, right.” Shun blinks and then smiles at him, the bright smile with the void behind it. “Sorry, bro. I’ll eat.”
“Can’t get anything done if you don’t eat.”
He doesn’t need to be reminded again, which is good. That’s something.
Later, they’re sitting on a park bench, and Sou stares up into the night. He’s looking for something, but he’s not sure what. Shun is leaning against him, head on his shoulder, warm and present in a way that wasn’t true in the noodle shop and saying in the dreamy, abstracted way that he says most things nowadays, “Maybe another meteor’s going to come down and take out the rest of the city.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” The moon is not quite full, like an eye half-lidded looking down at him. “Does it matter?”
“No, not really.”
It matters, Sou realizes as Shun is saying it. It matters.
He turns a bit to look down at Shun, who looks up at him in return, probably because his shoulder’s no longer providing a convenient resting spot. And he grabs Shun’s chin, ungently, and kisses him.
Shun kisses him back, but there’s nothing behind it. Not distaste or discomfort or even surprise, just an absent acceptance.
He pulls back. Shun says, “Bro?” and at least sounds puzzled, which is something.
“Never mind,” Sou says, shifting to look up at the sky again. “Don’t make me remind you to eat so much.”
“All right, bro.” Shun settles against his shoulder once more, as if nothing just happened at all. “The moon looks nice tonight, doesn’t it?”
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