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#kim taehyung fanfiction
sybilwriting · a month ago
filtering light 「 ch. 3 」
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pairing: park jimin x reader x jeon jungkook
includes: bunny!reader, human!park jimin, human!jeon jungkook, golden retriever!jung hoseok, human!min yoongi, tiger!kim taehyung, human!kim namjoon, human!kim seokjin.
word count: 7.5k
warnings: jimin and jungkook find out about the reader's last home. mentions of abuse, serious injury, vomit, and poor living conditions.
summary: the reader is a bunny hybrid with a past that has left her traumatized and struggling to heal. some things can be helped with therapy, but some things can only be fixed through realizing you're not all of the things that hurt you—you are, in fact, just loved.
[ one ] [ two ] [ three ] [ four ] [ five ] [ six ] [ seven ]
When Jungkook and Jimin chose their home, they knew they had gotten lucky. They had been just days away from deciding to build their own place when their realtor called with a house that wasn’t even on the market yet. It had been owned by an elderly couple who were moving to the country to be closer to family. The sellers were artists, the wife a retired sculptor and her husband had been an architect. When their realtor had said that, the two men were sure the home would be too modern for their tastes. They didn’t want something too cold or unfriendly. But when they arrived on the property they were pleasantly surprised.
The home was two stories, painted white with a wooden panelled wall. Inside, when you removed your shoes and stepped up to the entryway, the floors were a heated hardwood. The interior was clean and minimal, the layout somewhat open, but ultimately they felt like the home was cozy and safe. There were plenty of windows for natural light. The backyard was large and fenced-in. The house was perfect for them. They made an offer on the spot.
Since then, they have enjoyed hosting their friends and family. At any given moment, the house was filled with laughter, quiet conversations, music, or the smell of good food. It was a house used to holding people who loved each other. Especially on Sunday nights.
Sunday dinners had been Najmoon’s idea. He was tired of trying to pin down all of his friends to individual days when their schedules were so crazy. Sunday nights were one of the only nights of the week all of the guys weren’t working. So, they got together to touch base and stay connected in spite of their busy lives.
On this particular Sunday, when Jungkook returned from retrieving a couple beers, their friend Yoongi was sitting in front of the coffee table, leaning over a puzzle. Jimin was opposite him, trying to fit two pieces together. Namjoon was lying across the couch, scrolling through his phone. Everyone was trying to be nonchalant because almost 24 hours earlier, Jungkook and Jimin had filed their official inquiry for you and they hadn’t heard back.
Not yet, at least.
Their friends were trying to distract them, make the time go faster, and possibly be there in the event that it doesn’t go the way they had hoped. It would be surprising, though. Namjoon had tried and failed to explain to Yoongi what it was like, the way you had clung to Jungkook. You had looked at him with the whole galaxy in your eyes. Surely you would want to be adopted by them.
But until they got the call from Jennie, they held their breath. And figured they might as well start making dinner.
“When does Jin get back?” Jimin asked, taking one of the beers from Jungkook. Jungkook planted a kiss on the top of his head.
“Thursday night, late.” Namjoon sighed.
“Man, it’s been a while since he had to be gone so long.” Yoongi thought the last time had only been a few days. This time, Jin had left two weeks ago.
“I just wish I could have gone with him.” Namjoon shook his head. Sometimes when things at work weren’t crazy, Namjoon could travel with his Michelin star husband. However, it hadn’t been possible in a while. It was hard on them sometimes.
“We’ll all come over once he’s back and have drinks and make him cook for us.” Jungkook grinned, offering his friend the other beer. Namjoon nodded and accepted the drink.
“He’ll be very happy to meet your bunny.” Namjoon opened the can and Jungkook gave a bit of a forced smile.
“The food should be ready soon.” And then the youngest was gone again.
Jungkook wanted to distract himself. Jimin wanted to call Jennie for an update. Namjoon was coolly confident that the adoption would move forward, but knew saying so wouldn’t help his friends’ anxieties. Yoongi felt anxious because his friends, who were typically self-assured and unbothered, were experiencing the fear and uncertainty Yoongi himself struggled with. He wasn’t enjoying the shift. He liked to be able to fix things, especially for his friends, and all he could do at that point was wait with them. So he did.
The three in the living room alternated choosing topics, Yoongi talked about the current project he was working on at the studio, Jimin gushed about the vacation he and Jungkook had just taken, and Namjoon told them about the latest book he was reading. It was all surface level because it was the only level they could engage each other in. Jimin wanted to shake his friends and tell them they shouldn’t be as nervous as he was. It made him worry that they thought he had something to worry about.
Would you reject him and Jungkook?
When Jimin had told Jungkook he thought adoption was a good idea, it had taken a bit to convince the younger boy it wasn’t a joke. They had discussed what it would be like to get married, to start a family, to expand their businesses—but adopting a hybrid had never been on their radar. Namjoon had been so excited that he had run to grab the program director while Jungkook and Jimin discussed the seriousness of the situation.
“Do you even want a hybrid?” Jungkook had asked, unbelieving.
“I haven’t thought about it before,” Jimin admitted. “I never thought I’d want one, honestly. But…” He shook his head, trying to piece together his thoughts. “I don’t know. She seems special, Kook.” It seemed like a flimsy response but Jungkook watched the way Jimin’s face changed. His eyes softened, his mouth turned up in a smile Jungkook hadn’t really seen before. A smile like Jimin was faced with something new, wondrous even. And he didn’t know how best to respond.
“This can’t be something we do just because I want it.”
“It could be.” Jimin said firmly. “For the record, if that was the case, I would do it anyway. But I like her, too.” You hadn’t connected with Jimin the same as you had with his partner, but what interactions you two had experienced made Jimin hopeful that if you became a part of their family you and Jimin would have your own special bond. “There’s something about her,” was all he could articulate but Jungkook understood.
It felt like you had tied a little red string around their fingers, telling them to remember something they had not known in the first place.
When Namjoon had finally come back with the director, she already had a woman on the phone. Jennie was skeptical, both men could tell, when she heard they were interested in you. She explained that you were slow to warm up to people. You were nervous. And she found it hard to believe you would be ready to be adopted after only your first time engaging with humans casually. However, because the director was friends with Namjoon, she agreed to meet with them the next day. She had the whole morning open.
In the meantime, Jungkook and Jimin were squeezed into some meetings in order to expedite the process and submit their inquiry as quickly as possible.
It was all moving smoothly. Jimin had felt it every step of the way: that little red string tugging them closer and closer. Closer to you. He was sure of it.
“Jimin-ah.” He was brought out of his thoughts by Jungkook standing in the doorway of the kitchen. His eyes were wide and Jimin blinked, confused, until Jungkook held up his phone. It was ringing. JENNIE VIOLET was blinking on the screen.
“Answer it!” Yoongi said. Jungkook looked panicked.
“What’s the problem?” Namjoon asked.
“He’s afraid she said no.” Jimin understood. He got up and moved to his boyfriend.
The phone went on speaker.
“Ah, hello? Mr. Jeon?” Jennie’s pleasant voice came through.
Jimin realized he would need to be the one to speak when Jungkook stood staring at the phone, the timer clicking by for several seconds without a response.
“Sorry about that! Hi, Jennie. It’s Jimin. Jungkook is here with me.”
“Oh, great! I’ve got both of you.” They heard some papers moving around. “Well, I won’t keep you waiting…” she was speaking and Jungkook was clutching the phone so hard Jimin thought he might accidentally hang up before they could hear what Jennie had to say. Yoongi had run to turn off the burners in the kitchen and Namjoon was sitting very still on the couch, listening.
“The papers were signed just an hour ago. She would like to go ahead with the adoption. Congratulations!”
Jungkook’s eyes went to Jimin, filling with tears. Jimin immediately closed his eyes and leaned into Jungkook. Jungkook wrapped his arms around him. Yoongi walked in on the boys practically collapsing in the middle of the living room and looked at Namjoon for confirmation. Namjoon gave him a thumbs up.
The details were finalized for the next meeting with Jennie and when they finally hung up, all four men burst out in whoops and laughter, all of them kind of crying.
You wanted them back. Unbelievable.
They celebrated with more drinks with dinner that, thanks to Yoongi, wasn’t burnt. Jimin and Jungkook were functioning as though it was all a dream. Namjoon excused himself to call Jin, and Yoongi was already asking when he would get to meet you. That gave your soon-to-be owners pause. The answer was that no one knew. You would need time to adjust and feel safe. But, of course they would have the boys over as soon as possible.
Before they knew it, it was late. They were walking Yoongi and Namjoon to the door and hugging them, thanking them for their support. Then that night Jimin and Jungkook held each other, both smiling to themselves, thinking about that little red string.
You had gone to sleep after staring at the ceiling with wondering eyes. Then, you slept in late. Hoseok ended up coming to your dorm to wake you, breakfast in hand. The first thing you asked him about was Taehyung.
“He’s okay. He feels bad about his reaction and he’ll probably find you and apologize.” That was good. He didn’t hate you.
You had to be at Meeting Room A again, but this time you were going to get to see your new potential owners. The thought gave you butterflies, and every time you thought about it you would start running your hands along your ears in an attempt to self-soothe.
This felt different. You’d been adopted more than once, but you had never had a choice. You had never known your potential owners prior to their adopting you. Though, you supposed you didn’t know Jimin and Jungkook. You’d only met them once and as much as the thought made you uneasy, you trusted them.
In prior homes, you had always tried to give your owners the benefit of the doubt. You assumed that because you were half human, your owners would function similarly to you. You had never wanted to hurt someone, had never looked down on anyone, and you believed that everyone you met deserved a happy life. When you learned that humans didn’t feel the same way, you had stopped trusting them. Whenever you were adopted you would hide within yourself. You would curl up, around your heart, and when you did that your owners could do whatever they wanted (and they always did) but they would never touch your heart. And when you were alone, you would unwind yourself just the tiniest bit to dream yourself asleep. In the morning, when you were woken up, you would tighten your grip once more.
Living at The Violet had changed you. When you first got there, you wouldn't speak to anyone. You didn’t say a word for the first month. You were too wound up in yourself. You didn’t feel safe anymore. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d felt safe. So you just didn’t speak.
Then you met Hoseok. You were terrified of him at first, something you both joke about now, but eventually he made you feel safe enough to talk, slowly but surely. And you started meeting with the hybrid psychologist on staff and started processing the trauma that had been inflicted upon you. You were still a ways away from sleeping through the night and you always had anxiety when meeting new people, but you had started talking, eating more, and as long as you heard him coming, you didn’t jump when Hoseok showed up. Jennie was constantly telling you how proud she was of how far you’d come.
“You’re strong because you survived, you’re brave because you’re facing what you survived and not letting it destroy you,” is what she had told you when your psychologist cleared you for trips outside of the shelter. Sometimes The Violet took hybrids to the big downtown library, or to the museum, or sometimes to the park nearby. You could go with them now, but still avoided big crowds and preferred to stick to the company of other hybrids. The staff of The Violet all knew you but knew to keep their distance.
When Jennie had asked you about the Hybrid Equality Awareness Event you weren’t very excited. It had been over a year since you had come to The Violet and you hadn’t really interacted with many humans. Especially not in a big setting like the one that was planned. But with the promise of being all but ignored, and with Hoseok already planning to go, you decided that it would be just as good for the humans to see a bunny hybrid as it would for you to see a nice human. Jungkook and Jimin had taken you by surprise. It felt like a one-in-million chance. Or, you could have giggled to yourself at the idea, it was fate.
Whether chance or fate, you were heading towards it, petting your ears as you walked down the hall. There were some hybrids meeting with their case workers in the other meeting rooms, and behind the cloudy glass of Meeting Room A’s door you could see figures moving at the table. You paused for a moment before knocking.
When the door opened there were hands on your arms, pulling you gently into a warm chest. You were alarmed. Even Jennie cast a worried glance in your direction at the sudden intrusion of your personal space. You weren’t good with sudden movements like that. You were frozen against the soft human form for just a moment before the scent engulfed you.
You wrapped your arms around the larger man and your face went into his neck. The smell of smoky lavender invaded your senses. It was like coming home. Or like home finding you. You made a pleased noise, running your nose along Jungkook’s throat. It made him shiver, though you didn’t notice.
“Hi, bunny,” Jungkook said quietly, squeezing you gently. Your voice was small but happy, said hello back. You probably could have stayed like that for hours if you didn’t hear your name being said. Jimin was standing beside you, and when you turned your head you saw him smiling, arms open.
You shyly pulled yourself away from Jungkook, who started pouting, and before Jungkook’s arms were entirely removed Jimin was pulling you into himself. He wasn’t as big as Jungkook, but he was softer, and smelled like bergamot and peppermint. You couldn’t help pressing your face into his neck and enjoying the scent. Jimin chuckled and brought a hand up to scratch between your ears. It made you purr and you pulled away, your cheeks pink. Jennie was watching the whole scene unfold, and when the three of you went to take a seat she looked down, subtly sniffing and wiping at her eyes.
Thank god, she thought. You were obviously going to be well loved with the two men.
You were seated right in the middle of them and they each held one of your hands. Jennie started debriefing you on what the adoption process would look like going forward.
Jimin and Jungkook had some required meetings. The Violet required all potential owners to meet with specialists on the history of hybrids—how they were made, why they were made, what hybrid culture has looked like, and how The Violet is trying to give hybrids a future to look forward to. There is also a meeting on the specific breed of hybrid the potential owner will be adopting, and finally the potential owner must meet with the specific case worker who is assigned to the hybrid they want to adopt. They will be informed of the hybrid’s own personal history: past homes, medical information, etc. The Violet wanted to ensure that all of the potential new owners were fully aware of the responsibility of taking care of—not only a hybrid—but a specific hybrid with a specific past and specific needs.
Since both men had already attended the history of hybrids seminar at the Hybrid Awareness Event, they simply took a test to confirm they knew the information and they were good to move on to the next class: Bunny Hybrids 101.
They had spent the morning with a hybrid veterinarian who had given them each a packet on bunny hybrids.
“They’re the most delicate and often the most abused.” She had stated solemnly. Bunny hybrids were prey hybrids and struggled to feel safe when most things were a threat: especially humans. 76% of violence against bunny hybrids were perpetrated by humans and 63% of those crimes were committed by the bunny’s owners.
They learned about bunny hybrid mannerisms. They listened with rapt attention, because in everything they heard they had seen you do. The way a curious bunny looks around with wide eyes and ears twitching. The happy clicking noise a bunny makes. Even freezing when startled. Bunny hybrids were incredibly shy, but when they found their people they would show themselves to be very loving, attention seeking, and cuddly. Jimin and Jungkook longed to see you when you became more comfortable. The vet made it clear that you letting Jungkook hold your hand just hours after meeting him was a good sign.
“To be honest it’s probably because you kind of look like a bunny hybrid.” She joked. Jimin sent Jungkook a teasing smile and the younger boy tried to hide a grin and shoulder bumped him playfully.
There was a lot they didn’t know about you, however. They didn’t know that some basic foods were toxic to you: avocado was a big no, onions, garlic, or nuts weren’t good for you either. You had to steer clear of very sugary food and you couldn’t eat specific kinds of lettuce because of the chemicals found in it. It seemed as though humans hurting you weren’t the only threat to their bunny. Both men would take the task of making you healthy meals very seriously.
They learned about bunny behaviors, such as scenting and nesting. Bunny hybrids had the typical scent glands that all hybrids had—on their necks and wrists—and additionally had one on the bottom of their chin. They scented their pack and their children with their chin and it meant that they loved them very much. They sometimes scented casually too, by brushing their bodies against the people they cared about.
Nesting was interesting to the couple. Jimin had read a lot about hybrid nesting already. The vet told them that bunny’s only nested when they felt safe. They would take blankets, pillows, sometimes articles of clothing with familiar smells, and pile them all on a bed or floor pallett, and that’s where they would sleep. They liked it when their mates or pack members slept in it with them, because it added an extra feeling of protection and safety. A bunny’s nest was a sacred thing, they learned. Entry was invitation only, and there was no aggression allowed. A bunny in their nest was a vulnerable thing not to be taken lightly.
Jungkook and Jimin wanted to get you supplies to nest immediately. They wouldn’t force you to make a nest, only put all of the supplies in your room with the hopes that one day you would use them. They even wondered if you would want a few of their shirts to mix in as well, but neither of them voiced this hope.
Learning about a bunny’s nest went hand-in-hand with learning about their heat. This made your potential owners blush. They knew about hybrid heats and ruts. It was a kink among some humans, though neither men had found the idea of taking advantage of hybrids in that manner even remotely arousing. The vet explained that when you went into heat it meant you were ready for kits—or kittens, as baby bunnies are called. You would experience severe cramping, fever, cold chills, and headaches approximately four times a year. In that time, approximately 3-7 days depending on the hybrid, you would benefit from being mated. The vet explained that some hybrids actually preferred their owners to assist them, and both parties often found the experience bonding and mutually beneficial when both the hybrid and the owner were consenting and communication was clear. However, if owners were not comfortable assisting their hybrid there were plenty of opportunities through The Violet to find a hybrid who could assist their bunny through her heat. The only thing the vet said that was unacceptable was forcing their hybrid to go through heats alone.
A hybrid experiencing a heat or a rut without company or care was extremely dangerous and psychologically traumatizing. A hybrid’s cycle was not the same as a human’s. While a human can handle a little horniness, a hybrid’s cycle was deeper and more intense because of their animal counterparts. Enduring a rut or a heat alone was cruel and unusual punishment under any jurisdiction.
Jimin and Jungkook had listened carefully to everything the vet was saying. The information was in their packets as well and they could review when they got home. They finished their meeting with the veterinarian and it was then that they got to see you again, got to hold your hand and listen to Jennie say they just had to complete one more class. Then, you could be home with them as early as that week.
You smiled a little.
It was too good to be true. But the way Jungkook squeezed your hand reminded you that they were there and they were doing everything they could to make sure they provided a safe place for you. Your humans.
“I have to go check on something and grab some paperwork from my office, but you guys can visit while I do that if you’re comfortable?” Jennie was looking at you when she asked the question. You paused, trying to gauge whether or not Jennie leaving would make you feel vulnerable. For a long time Jennie was the only human you trusted. She was a little cold at first but when you got to know her she was playful and friendly. You liked her. You also knew she had your best interest at heart, so if she though it was okay to spend some time alone with your new owners, it was probably a good idea.
You looked up at Jungkook and Jungkook smiled down at you. Flushed, you looked away. You nodded at Jennie and she nodded back, trusting you. “Alright, I’ll be back in a bit.”
When Jennie left you felt your stomach tug. You were nervous. It was the first time you had been alone with Jimin and Jungkook. Would they find you too shy? Boring? What were you supposed to say? Did they want you to stay quiet?
Jimin said your name to get your attention and you looked at him, eyes wide with anxiety and curiosity. He was reaching into his bag and pulling out…another bag. He set it on the table in front of you.
“We’ve learned a lot about you in the last couple days, bun. Kook and I wanted to give you some things that might help the transition home better.” He gestured to the canvas bag. “You can also use it to carry some of your things when you come home.” He added.
There it was again. Home.
“Yeah, bunny. Home.” Jungkook squeezing your hand made you realize you must have spoken the word out loud. It had been just a whisper, soft and aching for it to be true.
You looked at him and then back at Jimin to get more confirmation and when Jimin patted the bag once more you let yourself reach for it.
Inside was a sweatshirt, a few shirts, and a deep purple box that was velvet on the outside. You ran your fingers across it as you set it on the table. You first picked up the sweatshirt, which was large and black. You typically didn’t wear such dark colors but you knew you would wear it to bed that night. You didn’t need to put it to your nose to smell the musky lavender embedded in the cotton. You did it anyway, look up at Jungkook for confirmation that what you were thinking was right. He gave you a soft smile.
“That’s my favorite sweatshirt.”
“And those are some of my shirts, too.” Jimin nodded toward the shirts. You picked one up and smelled the minty bergamot scent, closing your eyes for just a moment to enjoy it. It wasn’t the same as hugging them, but it was the next best thing.
“We figured it would help you get used to our scent before you came home.” Jungkook explained.
“If you don’t like them we can take them with us—“ Jimin was cut off by you whipping your head toward him, the noise coming from your throat a panicked one that you couldn’t stop. You clutched the shirt in your hand to your neck and shook your head quickly, slightly embarrassed you had gotten so defensive.
“No, no I like them.” You said quietly, looking down at them. Jimin laughed and it made you look up, eyes watching him as he threw his head back. He ran a hand through his hair as he looked back down at you.
“It’s settled then,” he continued to chuckle and you relaxed slightly. You made a note to watch him the next time he laughed like that. Every time he laughed like that, if you could. It made you feel like you could explode, the way his face lit up and his body shook. You didn’t realize you were smiling softly, but Jungkook did.
“Last thing,” Jungkook pushed the velvet box toward you. You’d all but forgotten about it.
Setting Jimin’s shirt back with the rest of the clothing, you wiggled in your seat, unaware that behind you your tail was twitching cutely in excitement while you tried to reserve how much of your emotions were displayed on your face. Jungkook and Jimin exchanged a glance behind your back as you leaned forward to get a better look.
The box snapped open when you pulled lightly on the lid. It startled you a bit but you forgot about it when you saw the necklace resting inside the satin cover. You couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped your lips. It was simple, the delicate chain wounding around until it met a small tag on the back, near the clasp. It was almost as small as your pinky nail. You were just stunned by it’s the beauty. You glanced at the tag and saw a single rock embedded above some design. Sure you’d seen your owners with rocks in their jewelry, but you had never asked what they were called. Now, you did. Your voice was small and choked as you ran your fingers dangerously close to the necklace.
“They’re called diamonds.” Jimin answered. “We didn’t want to go overboard, but we did want at least one.”
“You can touch it,” Jungkook assured you after watching you avoid it. “It’s yours, bunny.”
When you jerked your head to look at him, your eyes were filled with tears. Jungkook sat up straighter and his expression was alarmed. But you weren’t crying because you were afraid. You were happy.
“It’s…it’s mine?” You asked incredulously.When Jungkook realized you weren’t upset he exhaled and nodded, a relieved smile building on his face.
“Yeah! We were told you still needed a collar when you were in public and we wanted you to have one that didn’t really feel like a collar.”
Jimin reached over and tapped the tag near the clasp.
“That’s a scan tag, so if there’s any trouble we can scan the code right there and it pulls up your info.” Jimin pulled out his phone and his thumb was swiping quickly until he found the image he wanted. He held out the screen and you looked at it. It was your official adoption paper. It had an address, two phone numbers, and at the top was your name. That wasn’t what shocked you, of course. It was that your name was to the right of two other names you weren’t expecting: Jeon and Park. You were truly crying, now.
You covered your face with your hands and couldn’t stop the tears from escaping from between your fingers. Jimin and Jungkook looked at each other with wide eyes and cursed themselves. They were doing too much too fast. You must be overwhelmed. They should have waited on the collar. They should have let you pick it out with them. They should have—
You were moving suddenly. Your hands were trembling and you were taking the necklace out of the box. You brought it around your neck in an attempt to clasp it yourself, still crying. Jimin spoke in a hushed voice, trying to calm you down.
“It’s okay, bunny. Here, sweetheart. Is it okay if I help you?” He moved his hands when you nodded and reached for the clasp himself. He had it hooked in a second and when he pulled away you followed him, pressing your face into his neck and practically sobbing. Jimin looked at his partner for help and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you tight against him. Jungkook looked back, equally unaware of why you were hysterical. He brought a hand to your back and lightly stroked up and down, trying to comfort you as well.
“It’s okay, sweet bunny. You’re safe with us. We will take care of you and make sure nothing bad ever happens.” He was whispering, his other hand reaching for yours again. He wasn’t sure what was upsetting you, so he was trying all of the reassurances he could think of.
It was as if you remember he was there then, and when he touched you your tears seemed to start anew and you switched positions to press yourself against Jungkook. Jimin narrowed his eyes and Jungkook grinned in victory, sticking his tongue out. Jimin rolled his eyes and reached over to pet you, remembering how you had seemed to like it when he had done it earlier. Your response was to calm down, feeling his fingers in your hair. You were left sniffling, rubbing your eyes with your fists. It made him proud that he had managed to calm you down.
“That’s a good girl,” Jimin cooed when you’d stopped hiccuping.
They didn’t know if they should ask you why you had started getting so emotional. Before they could decide, Jennie walked back in with her arms full of papers.
“Alright, folks! How was your quality time? Are you ready to say bye for now?” She stopped when the door closed behind her. Her eyes widened when she took in the scene.
You never let strangers touch you like this. This was truly a phenomenon. Jennie called your name softly, looking back and forth between Jungkook, who was stroking your arm and sending S.O.S. signals with his eyes, and Jimin, who was staring at you while he pet your ears. Your ears. Jennie almost laughed. You must have had it bad for these guys.
“Are you okay?” She asked. You nodded without looking at her.
“Yes,” you managed to say, your voice still thick with emotion. You were pushing yourself up and off of Jungkook, understanding that it was time for you to go. Jimin looked like he wasn’t going to let that happen, his expression still concerned.
“Are you sure? Maybe you should stay?” He looked at Jennie and then back at you. You shook your head.
“No, I’m fine.” You gave him a smile even though your face was puffy from crying. He immediately returned it, brushing his knuckles across your cheeks to snag the remaining tears staining them.
“Okay,” Jennie nodded, watching you closely. “Well, then I have to tell you there's an agitated tiger hybrid waiting for you outside. And he seems very worried.”
You nodded in understanding, ignoring the slight alarm in Jungkook’s voice as he repeated the words agitated and tiger. Jimin put a hand on his arm and shook his head. Jennie wouldn’t send you out to be eaten, he was sure.
You gathered your new things in your bag, keeping the necklace on and putting the empty box away. Jennie noticed the jewelry and her eyebrows rose before she could hide her reaction. She quickly pretended not to see it and told you to say your goodbyes. The faster Jimin and Jungkook got this next meeting over, the faster you’d be leaving with them. No one noticed the bittersweet look in your eyes.
They walked you to the door, and you hugged Jimin first, whispering a thank you into his shoulder. He gave you a smile and kissed your forehead. Jungkook hugged you and promised they’d see you soon. He also pressed a kiss to your forehead before letting you go.
The expression on the men’s face as you closed the door behind you was heartbreaking. Jennie had to look away and distract herself with her paperwork. But only a second passed after you were gone before Jungkook was speaking.
“What was that?”
Jennie looked up and saw that he had been holding back earlier. He was truly alarmed at your crying.
“What happened?” She asked, though she was sure she already knew.
“We gave her her collar and she just—“
“She started crying uncontrollably.” Jimin finished for him.
Jennie nodded and ducked her head to process that information. It made her heart ache for the bunny hybrid she had had charge over for the last 14 months. She would cry later, over drinks with her roommates. But for now, she would just give Jungkook and Jimin a sad smile.
“She probably cried because it’s her first collar.”
The couple paused.
“I thought you said she’d been adopted before.” Jungkook said.
“She was.” Jennie started handing out the papers in her hands. “This is a great segway.”
The papers she had were copies of your file. Clipped to them was a photocopied picture of you when you were brought to The Violet. You were much thinner than you were now, your face gaunt and your eyes sunken into your face. It was like looking at your ghost. The men looked at it with steely gazes, their expressions hardening.
“You’ve learned about hybrids, you’ve learned about bunny hybrids specifically, and now you are going to learn about this specific bunny hybrid.” Jennie read your name aloud. “She has had four previous homes. Her first adoption was at fourteen. She was there for twenty-seven days before the family returned her stating she was too much responsibility for their child, whom they had purchased her for. She stayed at the shelter for another two months before being adopted by an older couple who, as far as she’s told us, weren't bad. She was close with the wife, and when the wife died, the husband didn’t have the means to care for her anymore. It was a heartbreaking return, and our bunny had only just turned fifteen.
“There wasn’t room in her old shelter, so she was placed into a foster home with several other hybrids. From what we understand, there was a problem with aggression on behalf of a male cheetah hybrid, and she had to be removed for her own safety. She was there for almost six months. When she went back to the shelter she was seventeen.”
“And this shelter she was at wasn’t The Violet, correct?” Jimin wanted to clarify. Jennie nodded.
“Right. This was one of the shelters deemed inhumane by recent policies the city implemented. The shelter is currently shut down and the remaining hybrids were moved to The Violet or other care centers like it.” She assured the two.
“However, she wasn’t dropped off like most hybrids. She didn’t come here from that shelter. She lived on the outskirts of the city, in a place she has only ever called the ‘blue house.’ Neighbors reported hearing screaming and thought a child was being hurt.” Jimin and Jungkook didn’t need more elaboration. They had just learned that a rabbit in pain sounds like a screaming human. The veterinarian had even played them clips so they were sure to know it when they heard it. It had been excruciating, but not as painful as the new knowledge that you had been making that noise. That you had been so hurt that you screamed and thought that your life was being threatened.
“When the police pulled up the records on the house and saw there weren’t any children living on the property, they took one look at the registered hybrid and contacted the hybrid authorities.” She passed two pieces of paper across the table. “I’m showing you this because you need to understand where she’s coming from. Brace yourselves.”
She flipped the papers over and the two men saw it was pictures. Jimin actually gasped.
“These were taken after the couple were in custody. This one is the house,” she pointed to the image of a dilapidated house. The front porch sagged and the shutters were all falling off. A couple windows were actually boarded up, and there was a broken toilet sitting outside of the front door. The outside of the house was, however, an unmistakable powder blue.
“This is where they found her.”
The other image was of a closet. It probably couldn’t even be called a closet. It didn’t even have a door. And it wasn’t big enough even for you to stand in. Jimin was sure you’d have had to crouch to get inside. Once inside there was what looked like a single dirty towel. It may have once been white, but was now blackened with dirt and stained with what looked like blood and urine. A puddle of what could have been vomit was visible on the ground. There were chains discarded on the floor, and in the very corner were two small stainless steel bowls. They may have once been for food and water but it was clear they were neglected and disgusting, with rotting food scraps and bugs crawling in them.
The idea that you had been in such a place was deeply upsetting to Jungkook and Jimin. Jungkook had to look away while Jimin’s choked voice asked what had happened. Jennie put the photos away before continuing.
“There are some things she should tell you herself.” Jennie acknowledged. “I’ll tell you what I feel comfortable disclosing.” The two males nodded for her to continue. “When they got to the house, she was unconscious. The couple was put in police custody and taken away. They had her chained in that place and admitted to having just disciplined her. Apparently she had been so hungry she had eaten the soap off of the kitchen counter. When she was suddenly sick, they punished her and then chained her up in her room.” The crawlspace.
“They beat her unconscious?” Jungkook’s voice broke.
“She was laying in a pool of her own vomit when the paramedics got to her. She was officially confiscated and they brought her here. The medical team did an assessment and found she had two broken ribs, and a fractured malar bone, on top of all of the lesions and bruising.” Jennie flipped their packets to the next page, which was your medical report. Both men saw the same thing: the doctor who examined you noted that you had evidence of previous breaks that had not healed properly. They ended up having to rebreak some of them to get the bones to set properly. Jimin and Jungkook were speechless with horror.
“When she woke up she was disoriented and terrified. She refused to speak to anyone and wouldn’t let anyone touch her. The medical staff had to sedate her to treat her wounds properly. She was malnourished and the truth is, if they had waited just a few days, she would have died of starvation.” Jennie said. Her expression was as solemn as they’d ever seen it. She must have been there when they brought you in.
“How long was she there?”
“Four years.”
There was silence.
The body language of the men told Jennie how disturbed they were. That was good. It meant they wouldn’t do the same thing to you. Jennie made a point not to take her cases personally. Other agents in her field have left because of how emotionally challenging it is to care for hybrids when it seemed as though the world wanted nothing but to destroy them. So when she swore an oath to serve hybrids and get them to a safe place, she had done so with the idea that she would keep all of her hybrids at arms length. She would do her job and send them off to be loved and safe with someone else. The less attached the better.
Then she’d gotten a call. She had a new case with an abused bunny hybrid brought in from the country. She’d taken one look at you, practically disappearing before her eyes, and went full on bleeding heart. She would never admit it, but she cared deeply for you and would only have considered Jimin and Jungkook if she was sure they would protect you like you needed. You deserved to feel safe and cared for, and watching you in their arms Jennie knew you were just that. She could live with this outcome. She could watch you go, even if it meant she might not see you again, if it was with this couple that obviously worshipped the ground you walked on.
“Since then, she has been in intensive therapy, regularly attends health check ups, and has even made friends.” Their thoughts went back to the aforementioned tiger hybrid. “She’s been here for just over a year and while we have worked hard to help her heal, she still has some things that only a consistently safe, loving home—where she is cared for and where she is able to make her own decisions—can fix. Do you understand?” Jennie’s gaze was pointed. They nodded.
Jennie went on to explain other details about your health, like the fact that when you hit your healthy weight your heats started coming back and your last heat was a month ago, so they had some time before they needed to worry about it again. You had also been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and PTSD. You were working with it and your friendship with a golden retriever hybrid had significantly aided in elevating your mental health.
By the time Jimin and Jungkook had all the information they needed and were dismissed by Jennie, the sun had gone down. They walked to the car in the dark, wondering where in the building you were laying down.
They had copies of the forms they’d signed, and they would get a call when everything was processed and they were allowed to pick you up. Until then they would have the right to visit you every day during visitor hours if they wanted. And they very much wanted that.
The last thing Jennie had said was hanging heavy between the two men.
“She cried because none of her other owners ever gave her a collar. She wasn’t ever allowed to leave. Even the elderly couple had kept her in and around the home. You two didn’t just welcome her into your home, but by giving her that collar you are making the point that it actually is a home. Not like her past places. Not a prison.”
They dragged themselves into the house and collapsed on the couch. Even then, holding each other felt incomplete because they knew they were missing you. They longed to have you squished between them, giggling and blushing while they cuddled you and told you how much they cared for you and how they would never let anyone hurt you again. They settled for knowing in a few days time you could be and they would never let you go.
© sybilwriting 2021
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n3onguts · a month ago
5 times he said i love you. | kim taehyung
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summary — different versions of ‘i love you’ told throughout the course of a relationship.
pairing — kim taehyung x f!reader
genre&tags — slice of life au, fluff, angst out of nowhere???, a terrifying lack of plot and direction (i cannot stress enough how unedited this story is. at some point, it got away from me and i just needed to be rid of it), taehyung making terrible choices while drunk, healthy-eating propaganda, pettiness and pride being the pitfall of every relationship, yk how it is
warning(s) — mentions of alcohol consumption and intercourse (but it's chill, they're both adults)
w.c. — bordering on 5k but pretty easy to digest
a/n — yes i have been working on my drafts (!!!), don't really wanna think abt them tho bc my laptop broke like two days ago, right when school's about to start so i'm not doing v good rn :/ anyways i've had this story in my head for a while ever since i read this one fic that used this same format (if i can find it i'll be sure to link the author as my inspo!) so i just wanted to get it out of my system. i'm not rlly a hardcore fan of bts (gotta admit tho... yoongi's passion for making music is so mmmmm), but when i started writing this i used taehyung's name as a filler for the guy character and it kinda just stuck. i hope u still enjoy, and as always, if u have any feedback, i'd love to hear it! :)
Taehyung loves your apartment.
He loves it in the morning. Waking up to the sound of sizzling, of wood against metal, lightly clanging in your kitchen as you whipped up breakfast-for-two. Exiting the comfort of your bedroom to find early solace in the domesticity of the sight before him — you, with your sleep-ridden hair and bare legs peeking out from under an oversized tee. Messy and mussed but still looking oh-so-fucking-angelic, crooning along to your favorite Etta James record playing in the background as the rising sun bathes the scene with its glow. Solid hands wrap around your waist from behind as he rests his head in the crook of your neck. Syrupy kisses come in place of a greeting and contented sighs seep out when you break apart: all he could ever want, and more.
He loves it in the afternoon. Both of you on your lumpy couch in the living room; your head in his lap, his hands in your hair. Everything in its place the way it should be. Happiness is home-grown and laughter permeates the air perpetually. You tap-tap-tap away at your laptop, which rests on your chest. He tries to pay attention to whatever’s on TV, but his eyes always end up on you.
He loves it in the nighttime. Dancing together in front of the bathroom mirror before bed, toothbrush still in mouth. Lights off, lamps on, the safe warmth of your thick comforter enveloping you two. Legs intertwined as your dainty fingers trace his features, like you’re trying to commit a map of him to memory. Minty lips follow to sleepily graze against the trail you’ve left — starting at the top of his forehead, along his cheek, down the bridge of his nose, and, finally, after what feels like eons and then some, pressing onto his patient mouth. The evening does something to you both: honest words are exchanged with less resistance. Admissions of pleasure and confessions of pain spill out after dark, until you both succumb to the exhaustion, bodies interlaced like puzzle pieces.
Taehyung loves your apartment, he really does. He’s told you that numerous times. It’s a lot easier to say than what he actually wants to, but, well, those three goddamn words? They relentlessly attempt to claw out of his throat.
So he waits.
In the dim moonlight, the white noise of the city below acting as the soundtrack to your romance, he waits.
He waits, and when he’s certain you’re fast-asleep — chest gently rising and falling at a measured rate, cheek taking ownership of his chest — Taehyung surrenders to the feeling.
Glancing at you through drowsy eyes, he mouths it in the dark, rapid yet cautious, like a secret and a promise meant only for the night.
I love you.
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Friday night — he found himself stuck at some bar, God knows where, struggling to stay upright.
Just one shot, Taehyung's sober self had stupidly claimed. One shot, and I’m done. But once his surroundings had started to go out of focus, and all he could make out were the cheers of his equally-idiotic friends, egging him on, well, how could he not succumb to the cloying pull of his own recklessness?
Alcohol was a shitty lover; it was bittersweet moments interspersed with short-term euphoria and long-term regrets. Side effects almost always included the following: (1) the ill-advised ballooning of his usually-muted ego, (2) a sudden and asinine surge of confidence, and, finally, (3), the mistaken belief that his present actions would have no future consequences, as though tomorrow would never come.
But tomorrow always did, and a half-dead, hungover version of him was always left to fix whatever mess he had made the night before.
Tonight, it seemed that drunk-dialing you was on top of his to-do list of mistakes to make. Clumsily, phone in hand, Taehyung summons your contact number, a familiar feeling of home washing over him once he spots your name at the top of his screen through heavy-lidded eyes.
It’s barely midnight, but half of him expects you’re already passed out, too glued to your bed from exhaustion to pick up. The other half — soft, daring, wishful — hopes that you aren’t.
It takes 3 rings before he hears your sleep-ridden voice hum through his line, “Hey. What’s up?”
For a moment, sobered by a split-second semblance of level-headedness, he hesitates.
“Hello? You there?” You patiently wait for a response, but worry laces your tone. Time to buck up and get this shit over with, he realizes.
Taehyung’s voice is timid, gentle, a juxtaposition to his booming surroundings, which are awash in a red glow and brimming with a sea of sweaty, intoxicated bodies. “Did I wake you?”
“Not really.” He hears you shift in bed, most likely sitting up to focus on the conversation. “Where are you?”
His response comes out slurred and ambiguous. “Um. Out?”
“Ah… you’re drunk.” He mentally curses himself for being so easy to read; you must be so annoyed, having your sleep disrupted by some boozed jackass. Instead, you laugh knowingly, and a wave of calm rolls over him. You don’t hate him, thank God.
Buzzing with a newfound self-assurance, the words start slipping out with much more ease. “Well, just a little.” You laugh again, and he’s grinning now, something wide and goofy and uninhibited.
“That sounds fun,” You murmur. “As long as you’re okay and you’re alive.”
“No—” He sighs dramatically. “I’m in agony. I wish you were here.”
“Oh, really? And why is that?” He can practically envision you as you say this: eyebrow quirked and delicate lips pulling into a faint smirk.
“I miss you less when you’re next to me.”
“O-kay, stupid. You know, you’re cute—” Taehyung pumps his fist in the air in celebration. I’m cute! He rejoices. “But you’re drunk.”
“What?!” He exclaims, and he hears you giggle at his sudden outcry.
Eyelids fluttering at the melodic noise, he imagines you’re seated at the foot of your bed, hugging your knees. Your ear is warm from the phone pressed against it and your toes are curling along your mattress. There’s a glint in your eyes as you speak to him, probably relishing in his current state of ill-advised inebriation. He’s making a fool of himself, he understands that much, but he doesn’t care — he’d run through the streets naked, if you willed it.
“You are, though.”
“I am, yes.” He concedes, nodding ruefully.
Another giggle. God, he’d never get tired of that. “Wonderful. So, do you have any more nice things to say to me while you’re drunk?”
You weren’t taking him seriously — couldn’t, seemingly. You were teasing him, he was sure, but he didn’t want that.
“I’d still miss you if I was sober, you know. Probably more so. The alcohol helps tamp it down a bit.”
“I kind of wish we were attached by the hip — or, like, I had a leash that I could use to drag you around with me.”
“Oooh… Kinky.” Now it’s his turn to laugh.
“No, hey—”
“Hey.” You interject, voice a bare whisper.
“I…” Taehyung massages his temples out of frustration. He wishes you would just listen. His restlessness has two fingers down his throat, pushing the words out before he’s even ready. “Look, it really doesn’t fucking matter whether I’m at some bar or at your place: I want you next to me always. You haunt me everywhere I go, and I’m tired of trying to escape it. Because, well, um, you know— Shit. I love you, okay? Sober or not. Dead or alive. Stupid or whatever the opposite of stupid is.” He pauses to take a breath. “Me. I’m the opposite of stupid.”
Silence consumes your end of the line, and it implores — no, demands him to fill it. The world around him seems to slow as he rambles on, “That’s why I called you. I wanted to tell you that I love you.” Hope overcomes him. “Fuck, man, do I love you! And I know you think it’s the alcohol talking or whatever — which, sure, yes, Jose Cuervo did help push the words out — but I’ll still wake up tomorrow morning and you will still be my first thought, just the way you are every single fucking day.”
A tense quiet lingers, terrorizing him. Finally, after what feels like a millennium in his drunken stupor: “Smart?”
Your voice is tender, lighthearted, yet simultaneously consoling — he could sense a masked apprehension that you were deliberately trying to keep hidden.
“What?” He eventually stutters out.
“The opposite of stupid is smart.”
Oh. “Yeah. Um. That’s me.”
“Uh…” You begin and he absolutely despises how patronizing you sound. “Let’s just forget about this, okay? I get it: you think you love me and that’s really sweet, but…”
As soothing as your voice attempts to be, it’s a stab in his gut as he realizes that you don’t believe him — or maybe don’t want to.
He doesn’t say anything.
“Um, so, I’m a bit tired, I think I’m gonna go back to bed.”
A monotonous ‘sure’ leaves him reflexively. There’s a numbness that takes root inside of him as he stares straight ahead.
“Take care of yourself, please. Text me tomorrow morning so I know you’re okay, alright?” You hang on for a few more seconds, expecting a half-hearted acknowledgement from him, but you get nothing in return.
Taehyung hears a final, careful ‘bye’ muttered from your end before the line cuts. He lowers his phone down from his ear, resting it on the counter next to him. For some reason, it feels oddly heavy now. Stuck in a daze, he stares at the device like it’s an alien—
What the fuck had he just done?
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“Tae, why would we ever need this much Jjajangmyeon?” You scold as he haphazardly scoops an entire row of instant noodles from the shelf into your shopping cart.
He shrugs, “It’s easy to make — you know I’m shit at cooking. Plus, it’s quick. And filling.”
You give him a withering look. “And full of sodium! Do you want a UTI? I swear to God, if you get sick, I’m not taking care of you.
“You say that but last time I did, you took a 3-day leave from work and rubbed my supposedly-smelly feet until I fell asleep.”
Grunting in response, you huff and he hears you mumble something along the lines of, “But they are smelly.”
You turn away from him to gingerly return the packets back into their place, ignoring his cries of protest when you leave only two behind — one for him and one for you. “Shut up. Why would it matter if you’re shit at cooking? You have me.”
At this, Taehyung smirks, leaning against the shelves like a quintessential rom-com lead. “I do?” He asks, voice dripping with innocence but eyes sparkling with mirth.
Grumbling, you wave a hand to dismiss him and he stumbles back dramatically, as though he’s been shot. You roll your eyes, “Will you behave? I feel like your mother.”
“Are we roleplaying right now?”
“We won’t be tonight if you keep being so annoying.”
“Okay— Sorry, sorry. My bad. Got the message. Behaving now.” He gestures to show that he’s zipping his lips.
He pulls out his phone to check your grocery list for what you two need next, eyes squinting to read the screen. Without missing a beat, you fish in your bag for his glasses and hand it to him. Taehyung pauses to look at the specs in your hand then back at you, before nodding gratefully and accepting them.
“It says we need bread next.” He announces, and you walk ahead to find the aisle containing bread. He maneuvers the cart to follow the route you leave behind as you check the aisle markers, zig-zagging along the pathway like a little pinball machine.
“Here!” You call out. Up ahead, you disappear into one of the aisles, and moments later, he enters said aisle to spot you trying (and subsequently failing) to reach the bread you want on the top shelf. You stop tiptoeing when you see him rush over.
He grabs the nearest loaf, one that’s eye-level to you, and waves it in front of your face, “Why not this one?”
You send him another withering look. “That’s white bread, Tae.”
“And so?”
“It’s super processed.”
“Yeah? Well, I’m young.”
“And you’ll die young if you eat garbage. Will you just get the whole-grain bread I was reaching for?”
“I don’t understand why you’re so concerned about these things — I’m an active guy, I’ll be okay.”
“Well, I’m sorry I care about your health.”
He wants to laugh at the scene before him — you, with your arms crossed and your eyebrows hardening like a petulant child — but he knows that would only irk you even more.
“No— Hey— C’mon.” Taehyung tries to pull you into a hug, but you swerve and swat away his attempts to close the gap between you two. “I’m glad you do. I’m very grateful, actually.”
Your pursed lips melt into a soft pout. “You just— You don’t know what a demon white bread is! I read an article about it the other day, and it’s made of refined grains, Tae! Refined grains.” You explain hysterically, hands buzzing around with the air of someone who's just divulged an incredibly juicy secret. “They’re chock-full of sugar and preservatives! And these preservatives have chemical names that no one ever questions because they can’t understand it, so they just accept it! You can eat a whole loaf in one sitting, Tae. I don’t want you to contract diabetes or something worse.”
When you finish your tirade, you go quiet, and when he looks into your eyes, dark pools he wouldn’t mind drowning in, he can’t tell whether he wants to laugh at your absurd worry over him or cry at your sincerity.
Instead, he smiles. It’s unrestrained, crinkling the corners of his eyes. “That’s a bit of a far reach.”
In one swift movement, Taehyung grabs the loaf you were eyeing earlier and hands it over nonchalantly. “But I do love you. So I’ll try my best not to.”
Perhaps it’s because he’s just said he loves you for the first time — terrifyingly sober, under the harsh fluorescent lights of your local supermarket, after you’ve lectured him about his health and as he casually tries to give you bread — that you stare at him for longer than he’d like, eyes peering like he’s become transparent. But he stands his ground.
He shrugs, tossing the loaf into the metal cart behind you. He thought your inability to respond might bother him, but, surprisingly, it doesn’t. In fact, he doesn’t think he minds much. Taehyung always assumed loving someone with certainty would be like an immediate thing, a singular, specific moment he’d have to seize with confidence or it would pass, leaving him wrecked with nerves and regret. But, as it turns out, certainty could wash over him during the most mundane of instances and love would slide out easily into his words, as though it always belonged. Maybe it had.
“You love me?” You say, and when you do, it almost sounds like a wish. One he’d go to Hell and back to grant.
He looks at you like you’ve just told him that the sky is blue or the Earth is round. “Yeah. Of course, weird-o. Was I not clear enough with my profession of love earlier?
You shake your head as you laugh. “No, you were.”
Taehyung nods, satisfied, moving past you to push the cart in search of the next item on your grocery list. But before he can, he feels a pair of small hands clutch his arm and a face nuzzle into the wide expanse of his back.
“I love you too.” You muffle, voice humming warm air against his sweater. “Which is why I’ll let you get a pack of Oreos.”
“Fuck yeah!”
“But just one.”
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Stumbling inside your apartment, you rush out of your boots and head straight for your bedroom, locking the door. A few footsteps behind you, Taehyung follows, disgruntled by your brisk pace.
“Y/N!” You can hear him from inside your room, where you’re sat on the bed, staring into space as you try to process what had just ensued during the car ride home from Jin's dinner party.
“Your ‘friend’, huh?” You're staring stonily ahead, eyes carefully fixated onto the cement floor of the car park.
He’s still settling into his seat, shuffling on his seatbelt, too busy to really comprehend the challenge you’ve just initiated. “What?”
“When Jisoo asked you to introduce us, you said, and I quote, ‘Oh, this is my friend, Y/N.’ You called me your friend.” Gone is the acidity that laced your tone mere moments ago, replaced by an almost mechanical voice, something carefully constructed to mask feeling.
Taehyung stops what he’s doing to look up, finally taking notice of your cold demeanor. He frowns, “But you are my friend.”
“So that’s all I am to you? Just your friend?” You whip your head to face him now, fully, arms crossed. You’re devoid of emotion as you await an answer from him. He, on the other hand, looks utterly confused.
“What— No, of course not—”
“No, you were right. We’re friends. We are.” You cut him off. “Just friends. You’re correct.”
“I didn’t mean anything by—”
“I know. Which is why it’s no biggie.” You shrug, switching from robotic to indifferent. He can’t decide which is worse. “Let’s go home. I’m tired.”
You turn away, finished with the conversation, but he isn’t.
“I don’t understand— You were in such a good mood at dinner. What the fuck is happening?”
Looking at him again, you smile now, a sedative Taehyung won't fall for. “Nothing. Nothing’s happening. Can you start the car now? It’s freezing.”
Frustrated, he shuts up and does as he’s told, punching the keys into the ignition. You two sit in aggressive silence as he exits the car park.
The city roads are relatively bare, save for a few trucks driving along the highway. Passing street lamps illuminate your face in intervals, and every so often he looks over to check on you. When the car reaches a stop light at an intersection, he speaks up.
“I didn’t mean anything by it. Honest. I didn’t.” His phrasing is wary, but heartfelt. So much so you almost want to put the matter to rest.
But pride is the only thing you’ve ever known — your child, a monster you’ve nursed back to health when wounded and fed when starved. You’ll be damned if you back down now.
“Right. It’s okay. We’re fine. I swear.” It’s terrifying how easily these lies breeze out of your mouth, without so much as a pause.
“I mean— We never had a discussion about our label— I just assumed—”
“I get it. No harm, no foul. We’re friends.”
“It was just automatic in my head, and I don’t know why. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
At this, you let out a cruel laugh. “Jesus, Tae, let’s not jump to conclusions here. Don’t assume I even care enough about you to get hurt by something as stupid as that.”
His face contorts as though he’s been bitten. “I understand that you’re mad, but you don’t have to be so unnecessarily mean.”
“I’m not being mean. I said I get it, right? You think our situation is too difficult to explain and blah, blah, blah. Now, can you focus on the road?”
When the traffic light turns to green, he steps on the gas pedal. Any and all discussion is once more extinguished, up until you reach the warm basement parking lot of your apartment building.
You’re gathering your things, about to head out of the car door, when you feel his hand pull at yours.
“I really had no ill intent when I said that. You’ve just always been my friend, so I had no other word for what we are now.”
You twist your head to see him, eyebags accentuated in the shadows, pleading with you to understand. You grip him tightly back, a sickeningly sweet smile etched onto your lips, “Like I said, we don’t have to discuss this anymore. We are friends, Tae, you were right.”
“We’re friends— I’m your friend! The friend whose bed you spend more nights in than your own. The friend who knows that you brush your teeth in a specific order because that’s how your grandma taught you when you were nine— Or that your favourite compliment is when people tell you that you look like your dad because he’s your idol. I’m that friend! The friend who takes off from work the minute she hears you’re sick, who learns how to make Japchae exactly how your mom did. The friend who’s held you when you’ve cried, cleaned up your sick when you’ve gotten drunk, and swallowed your goddamned cum! The friend you fucking said ‘I love you’ to! Just fucking friends!”
Your furious shouts echo throughout the empty space, bouncing from wall to wall so that even when you've finished your rant, eyes frenzied and hands done flying, Taehyung can still hear your words create a cavern of guilt in his chest.
Fast-forward back to the present moment: there's a knot in your heart as you get ready for bed. Looking at your reflection in the mirror as you brush your teeth, you wonder, is loving someone supposed to be this hard?
“Y/N, please. I’m sorry. Open up.”
You gargle the last of the water in your cup and spit, wiping your mouth and smoothing down your pajamas as you head for the door. Opening it up, you assume a pleasant facade.
“What’s up? Sorry for the wait, I was changing.”
If your nonchalance deters him, he doesn’t show it. “I’m sorry. I realized I never said that. I’m sorry I called you my friend— I wish I hadn’t.”
“Tae, I told you, it’s not a big deal, we’re goo—”
“No, we’re not.” He runs a tired hand through his hair. “If you had introduced me as your friend, I’d feel fucking terrible. I’d feel so put out.”
You stay quiet, and you don’t want to, but you can feel yourself cracking.
“Friends don’t say I love you like that. And I love you like that. I’m sorry.”
You let a sigh escape. Your mom once told you that you housed a terrible anger, one you’d hold onto no matter how exhaustive it could be. But when he looks at you like that — disarmingly earnest in his sorrow, like wounding you wounds him — you want to raise a white flag in surrender, want to promise him you’ll do everything in your power to douse your pride.
You rest your forehead onto his chest and you hear him exhale in relief. He envelopes his arms around you (a cocoon you think you never want to leave), burying his nose into your hair.
“I should’ve just called you what you are: my girlfriend.” Taehyung whispers, a final reparation. “You’re my girlfriend, right?”
You pray no hesitance bleeds out into your words. “I’m your girlfriend.”
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“You’re my girlfriend.”
“I know.”
“And I’m your boyfriend.”
“I know.”
“So if you know, then why—” Taehyung exhales out of his nose. “You can’t treat people this way, Y/N.”
“I know.”
He’s standing across the room, arms crossed as he berates you. You really want him to leave, but if he did, you’re certain you’d run after him. You also want him to hold you, but if he did, you’re sure you’d only push him away. Feelings are stupid like that.
You poke craters into your lumpy mattress, chin resting in between your raised knees. Parts of you feel guilty, and perhaps that’s why you’re avoiding his gaze. But you’re also stubborn. I’m entitled to be selfish about my pain, you think.
“You’re supposed to— Why won’t you—” Lots of words swim in his chest. Taehyung wishes he could just reach inside and pull out the right ones, because all of the ones he uses only make you seem farther away. “You can’t keep doing this, Y/N.”
“Doing what?” You spit out, all poison. Why? You wonder. You’re clearly in the wrong here.
“This.” He gestures towards you like it’s obvious. “Holing up in your own little world, refusing to let anyone else in. And then when I come to you to try and understand, you make me feel like I’ve done something wrong.”
You open your mouth to say haughtily that he hasn’t, but you’re cut off.
“God, Y/N, you know— It’s actually fine that you’re like this. I don’t mind if you shut everyone out, don’t mind if you’re hard to reach, because I’ll put in that effort. You expect me to give and give and give, and you know what? That’s fine. It’s fine with me. I’ll say sorry first, I’ll concede, I’ll swallow my ego, I’ll let you win. I don’t mind.”
You fiddle with your bedsheets, eyes fixated on them so hard you think you might burn a hole through. You shouldn’t be, but for some reason, you’re irritated that he’s confronting you with all your wrongdoings and letting you get away with it.
“I don’t mind! Really, I don’t. I’ll let you do whatever. That’s how much I love you.” He runs a hand through his hair, exasperated. “All I ask for in return is that when I knock on the door of this little cage you’ve built for yourself, you let me squeeze in beside you.” His voice tapers off, “I’ll make myself small, won’t be a bother— Won’t even take up that much space, really. I just want to be in there with you. That’s all I want. That’s not much, is it?”
You want to tell him you’ve always lived like this — behind a smoke screen, inaccessible, like connection is a tap you can just turn on and off. Hurts less that way.
When you glance at him, guilt swells. Did you do this to him? Taehyung’s face looks worn; his eyes, desperate. A flicker of sadness pierces through your gut. You let him infiltrate your life, carve out a designated space for himself in your daily routine, and when he tells you he loves you, drunk, you refuse to believe it; he tells you again when he’s sober and you still can’t. You hate it when he introduces you as his friend, but get scared when he refers to you as his girlfriend.
You don’t know when it all turned to shit. Maybe it started during that week he was too busy to contact you, and you retaliated by ignoring him for the next two. Maybe it was because of that time he called you ‘difficult to be with’, and how no matter how many times he apologized, you couldn’t prevent that cancerous little seed of insecurity from burrowing itself in your mind. Or maybe it’s always been shit, and you’ve just been too spellbound to look at things with a clear head.
You try to absolve yourself of any blame, try to convince him as well as yourself: “I never asked you to do any of that. You did that to yourself.”
His hands implore you to see reason. “But that’s what a relationship is. You don’t ever have to ask— I’ll still be here anyway, still be waiting. That’s what loving someone is.”
There’s a phenomenon in psychology known as Stockholm Syndrome: it’s when a kidnapping victim forms an emotional bond with their captor. It seems irrational, unlikely. How could anyone fall for a person who’s hurt them? Defend them like none of that pain ever happened? But people do it everyday, you realize. People settle — they make compromises, they let themselves get stepped on, they excuse their chest aching as part of loving someone.
You let Taehyung’s words drift into the cold air of the room. The scene has slowed down. He’s sitting now, on the edge of the bed, and he looks like a husk of himself, as though getting all those words out has sucked him dry. You look outside of your window and notice that it’s drizzling.
“Did you bring a coat?”
“Huh?” He follows your line of sight. “No, I didn’t.”
“You can borrow my umbrella.”
From your position on the bed, you watch the rain fall, and from the corner of your eye, you see him tilt his head at you, like you’re a puzzle he’s trying to figure out.
“Don’t you ever get tired?” When you inquire, it comes out casual, without the cadence of the argument you just had.
“Being here. Waiting.” A pause. “Loving, I guess.”
Taehyung shakes his head firmly, obediently, like he’s confident his love will be enough for the both of you. “No. Never.”
The next time you speak, you can hear two hearts break. “I do.”
205 notes · View notes
honeytae · 4 months ago
I didn’t know you had a thing for bandanas.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIV! omg how do i even’re not only one of my favorite people on this site but literally one of my favorite souls on this earth. you radiate warmth, wit, and yes...thottery :) so of course i had to write some grammys tae smut for you, right? of course i did. i love you so much, i hope you have a fabulous day and i’m sending you so so many hugs! happiest of birthdays to you @taetaespeaches, my sister wife, my twin flame, the best honey boy min enthusiast, my favorite wholesome thot! i love you i love you i love you <3
genre: smut (ofc)
warnings: GRAMMYS TAEHYUNG, suggestive texting mentions, tae’s a Tease™️, heavy petting and groping, grinding/dry humping, fingering, brief nipple play, there’s a handjob or two, unprotected sex (stay safe!), mild dirty talk and profanity, this is pretty much just filth i do apologize
word count: 2.7k
“Oh my god.” 
Huffing, you tossed your phone back onto the counter, staring back at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, lips parted in disbelief. You could not believe Taehyung, truly. He could be a tease, of course, but tonight he was on another level. 
The number of photos, that could only be described as none other than thirst traps, you’d been sent throughout the night was dizzying.
Spanning from the time he was getting ready for the Grammy’s red carpet to when he was backstage in that goddamn bandana for the Old Town Road performance, you’d already stashed them in a hidden folder, pulling them back up on your screen whenever your brain drifted to them again. Which, admittedly, had been a lot over the past few hours. 
Despite traveling overseas for the award ceremony together, you could not attend the show with him for obvious reasons. Truly, you didn’t mind. You weren’t about the glitz and glamour anyway; but fuck, he really wasn’t making it easy on you. 
In addition to the multiple professionally taken shots of your boyfriend at the show beginning to circulate, your texting conversation with him consisted of only attachment after attachment at this point, eyes practically bulging out of your head with each scroll of your thumb and hooking you in for more in his absence from your hotel room.
And that had been your only activity for the night until you decided to part from the television and get ready for bed. 
Groaning when your phone began buzzing repeatedly on the marble, you set the washcloth you’d been running over your face atop the surface, peeking at the screen and rolling your eyes when you saw your boyfriend’s name across the top of it.
Swiping your thumb across the flashing display, you lifted the phone to your ear, leaning your stomach against the counter as you mumbled a greeting. 
“Hey, why didn’t you respond?” He asked immediately, making you chuckle at his bluntness. 
“I’m still processing the information you’ve provided me with, Tae.” You responded, hearing the man’s deep chuckle reverberate through the device. 
“What information is that, love?” 
You could hear the amused teasing in his voice, smug grin prominent on his face as he awaited your reply. 
“The endless shirtless selfies, Taehyung. That is the information I’m referencing.” You said, thinking back on the several attachments you’d gotten notifications for over the course of the night, each time Taehyung was changing his outfit followed by a photo of him nearly naked in the mirror backstage.
“I thought they were tasteful.” He teased, giggling when you groaned on the other side of the call. 
“Biting your lip while gripping your bulge? Oh yeah, I’m sure Army’s would agree. Very tasteful.” You teased back, the man humming deeply.
“I don’t share those things with Army though, because those are for you only.” He smirked, you mirroring his hummed reply with a slight smile.
“When are you coming back?” You asked, tapping your fingernails against the surface beside the basin of the sink.
“We need to do one more interview, then we can leave.” He answered, a member of the staff speaking in the background followed by Hoseok’s laugh ringing out through the room.
You sighed in response, quiet enough that you thought he wouldn’t hear it. That thought was proven wrong almost immediately as he chuckled, the phone shuffling in his grip as the voices in the background turned to muffled noise. 
“What’s wrong, hm? Miss me?” He lowered his voice to presumably not be heard by others, his husky tone causing you to swallow a harsh gulp, thankful you weren’t video calling so you could play along with his little game.
“Mm, not particularly. I just wanted to play GTA with Kook.” You teased, smirking at Taehyung’s scoff, hairs raising on your arms as he chuckled into the phone and through your speaker.
“Alright. Well, you can expect Kook soon.” He said, tone smug as he heard the breath hitch in your throat. 
“Love you.” He murmured into the phone before abruptly hanging up, leaving you clutching your phone with a racing heart as you anticipated your boyfriends’ arrival. 
Trying to fight the now strengthened desire for your man, you blocked out the images from tonight along with the tone of his deep honeyed voice through the phone the best you could, reaching for your soap pump with a sigh. 
“Unbelievably rude.”
The silence of your room was awfully loud as you drew out the remaining steps of your skincare routine, hoping that if you took long enough then there would be less empty waiting time for your boyfriend. Your incredibly attractive boyfriend who you could not wait to get your hands on.
Your eyes continually darted to the timestamp on your lock screen, sighing each time as only a few minutes had passed since the last time you checked. 
If Taehyung could see how desperate you were acting right now, he’d surely have that god damn smirk on his face, one that would probably have your jeans unbutton themselves beyond your own control. 
Heaving another sigh, you distractedly stretched your neck from side to side, scrunching your face up in a grimace at the resulting snaps.
The closing of your eyes combined with the loud rush of water from the faucet seemed to drown out the sounds you’d eagerly been waiting for, nearly jumping out of your skin at the sudden addition of Taehyung next to you through the reflection of the mirror above the sink. 
His hair was still styled over that black and white patterned bandana, matching with the shirt that exposed just a touch of his bicep and a whole lot of his chest. 
Despite the immediate salivating of your tongue, you kept your shocked expression on your face, breathing out his name as you leaned a hand on the counter beside you. 
“Fuck, you scared me.” You placed your other hand over your heart, Taehyung grinning before reaching his arm out to pull you into his chest, pressing a kiss to each cheek before leaning back to smile at you.
“Sorry, love. Ended up leaving a little earlier.” He explained, smirking as your eyes glued to the bandana still tucked under the hair over his forehead. 
“Hm, I don’t mind.” You said, blowing a breath past your lips at the man’s appearance. 
“What?” Taehyung asked in reference to the action, his eyes blinking back at you as your hand traced over his long hair curled to perfection. 
“You look really fucking good right now. Not that I need to tell you that.” You mumbled distractedly, fixing the strip of fabric laying over the top of his forehead, Taehyung teasingly raising his eyebrows at you with a swipe of his tongue over his bottom lip.
“No, please do.” He said smugly, causing you to snap out of your lust-struck daze as you tapped at his shoulder with a snort.
“What an ass.” 
“That’s what I’m saying.” He responded, smoothly trailing his fingers down a bit lower to rest on your butt and gently grope the globes, pulling you flush to his chest as his darkened eyes held contact with yours. 
“Can you ever get your head out of the gutter?” You tried to say, gasps escaping every few words as he began pushing your hips into his, effectively grinding his erection into you.
“Hm,” he pretended to ponder for a moment, “with you, no.” He said, placing his hand on your jaw to pull you into a long-awaited kiss, soft yet sensual in the way he smoothed his lips over yours. 
Your breath caught in your throat as Taehyung’s hand slipped beneath the hem of your underwear, letting his thumb glide over your clit as his tongue invaded your mouth. 
The action was needy, as was the manner his fingers gathered the slick leaking between your folds to push up to fill your hole. Taehyung swallowed your moans as his fingers played in your pussy, his deep chuckles vibrating against you while his fingers dutifully pumped into your entrance. 
“Like that, baby?” He mumbled against your bottom lip, your mouth hanging open as you whined incoherently in response. He groaned at the spasming of your walls around his appendages, leaning his forehead against yours as he backed you up against the counter to stabilize your increasingly wobbly legs.
“God, you drive me crazy.” He grunted, rutting his hips into your thigh as you moaned his name once again. 
Squealing as he suddenly withdrew his hands from your underwear and lifted you up on the counter by your hips, you watched with raised brows as the man ripped your pajama bottoms and panties down your legs, easily tossing them onto the tile floor and leaving your lower half bare on the cold marble counter beside the sink. 
“Eager, are we?” You murmured, Taehyung smirking as he shuffled out of his pants, his boxers soon to follow as you took the liberty of removing his t-shirt from your torso. 
“And you aren’t?” He posed, taking the shirt from your hands and tossing it somewhere below him in the mess of clothes piling up beside his feet. Tugging you by the thighs, he smiled as you helped him by scooting to the edge of the counter, wrapping your arms around his neck as his own hands landed on your lower back.
“I didn’t say that.” You said, fingers tousling the fluffy hair at the crown of his head as he hummed, playing around with the clasp of your bra until it released with a small sound, the cups immediately releasing your breasts as he pulled the straps down your arms. 
“I consider it a good thing that we can’t keep our hands off each other.” He shrugged, gently prying your arms from around his neck to successfully remove the bra dangling from your wrists, pressing kisses to the pulse points of your wrists before laying them down in your lap as his hands instead landed on your breasts. 
You sighed as his thumbs easily circled your nipples, his eyes glued to your chest as he watched the buds twist into peaks with a small grin. 
“So pretty.” He whispered, making you blush as you distractedly reached for his dress shirt, snapping the buttons out of the holes in a haste to see his bare chest. The task proved to be difficult with Taehyung’s increasing pressure on your nipples, a knowing smirk on the man’s face as your pleading eyes desperately darted to his own. 
“Tae, this shirt is really testing my patience.” You sighed, the man chuckling as he reluctantly removed his hands from your chest to assist you in unbuttoning the shirt that had nearly killed you while watching him perform a couple of hours ago. 
As soon as he undid the fifth or sixth button down, your hands were on the revealed skin, feeling him like a madwoman as he lovingly chuckled at your actions. Tossing the loose material to the floor, he finally stood before you completely naked, placing a hand on the back of your head to guide you to his lips in yet another heated kiss.
Taehyung hummed deep in his throat as you reached down to pump his fully erect cock in your hand, taking the hint as you lined him up at your entrance with a push of your other hand on his shoulder. 
“Love you so much.” He mumbled, his eyes fluttering shut as he pushed his hips forward to sink into you, each inch providing you with a delicious burn as you let your head rest on his shoulder, his lips pressing a tender kiss to the side of your head as he finally fit himself snugly inside of you.
Starting off slow, he only slightly moved his cock back before pushing it in again, causing you to mewl as he started teasingly circling his hips inside of you. The grinding was nice, sure, but it gave you no real relief. Which he was perfectly aware of.
“Fuck me harder, Tae.” You whimpered out as he continued sensually grinding into you, taking your bottom lip into your mouth as he stopped his actions completely.
“Hm? What was that, love?” He cockily raised his brows at you, grinning at the look of pure frustration on your face.
“Fuck me harder. Taehyung.” You practically spat out, the man tutting at your tone.
“Where are your manners, love?” 
“Tae,” you whined, “please just fuck me.” You begged, Taehyung simpering as he picked up your calves, resting your legs in the crooks of his elbows to push your knees to your chest and effectively spread you wider for him. 
Picking up the pace of his thrusts, he groaned at the feeling of your walls squeezing around his cock, praising you with a moan of your name as he tilted his head up toward the ceiling. 
With you leaning forward to kiss his jaw, Taehyung broke eye contact with the vent in the ceiling, instead focusing on you as he continued rolling his hips into yours. His eyes held yours with intense force, only faltering with a flutter of his eyelids when your walls began spasming around him.
“Shit, I love your pussy, baby.” He breathed, placing his lips back on yours when you responded with a wanton moan, placing his hands on your hips to glide you along his length in addition to the force he pounded into you with.
You whimpered at the sudden speed in which his hips slapped into yours along with the depths he managed to hit with the angle, clutching onto his shoulders in an attempt to ground yourself as he groaned your name.
“Fuck, oh my god.” You cried as he sped up the pace of his hips, gradually working himself up into an almost inhumane speed as he quite literally attempted to split you open with his cock. His grunts punctuated each thrust, hot breaths fanning out onto your neck as he buried his face in your skin.  
“T-tae.” You stuttered as the tip of his cock repeatedly tapped at your cervix, Taehyung responding with a deep moan as he glanced down between your bodies, eyes glued to where you met over and over again as your walls tightened the hardest they had yet around him.
“Cum, baby.” He panted, lifting his eyes to watch your own squeeze shut with a gasp, the man himself falling over the edge at the sight. Nothing could ever get him off like watching you orgasm.
As he hastily pulled out of you, you whined at the sudden emptiness in your core, leaning your head back against the mirror in exhaustion as your droopy eyes watched him jerk his cock using your slick, only a few moments passing before translucent white liquid shot out from his tip and onto your stomach. 
Sitting up from the mirror, you fell into Taehyung’s arms, the man chuckling a bit as he rubbed his palm over your spine. 
“I love you.” He murmured, breaths finally evening out as he held you in his arms, your own loosely wrapped around his waist with your fingers caressing the skin of his hip.
“I love you too,” you leaned back to look at him, forehead pressing to his as you gave him a lazy smile, “and I’m so proud of you. You were amazing tonight.” You said, swiping his long bangs out of his eyes as he shyly grinned at you, his flustered reaction at your words causing you to giggle fondly. 
“I couldn’t have done any of it without you.” He admitted, misty eyes making you cup his cheeks as you pressed your lips to the plush skin on either side of his nose. 
“Of course you could have. You’re amazing Tae, don’t underestimate that.” You soothed, the man’s lips quirking up slightly as he tipped his chin to place his lips on yours. 
“Okay.” He whispered against your bottom lip, chuckling breathily when you began pressing feather-light kisses to his lips, exaggerating them with loud “muah”s making Taehyung’s eyes shut as he laughed. 
“You good?” You asked, his irises sparkling back at you as he nodded in confirmation.
“I’m great.” He said, reaching up to push his hair back off his forehead, the copious amounts of gel his stylists had put in his hair throughout the night defying the action and making it fall back onto the skin anyway.
“Good. Now clean your cum off my stomach, I wanna go to bed.”
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hueseok · 3 months ago
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“the one where taehyung gives you an amusing yet all the same arousing lap dance.”
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━ boyfriend!taehyung x reader ━ 1.1k words. ━ nc-17 ━ fluff, established relationship au ━ warning/s: swearing, tAEHYUNG GIVES A LAP DANCE??, suggestive mature themes, making out, um a hand over tae's bulge? SDKJDKS
note. did i abandon everything after watching tae's twt video to write this drabble??? besties,, i dont even know if this drabble makes sense iM JUST HERE TO WRITE MY FEELINGS OUT AFTER WATCHING THE VID OKAY this isnt even proofread lmao
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when taehyung promised you a good time, a delicious way to spend the night after your long day at work, you’ve expected that he was going to order some take out from your favorite fast food restaurant and spend the whole night with you just watching cheesy movies with you like he usually did to ease your stress away.
he still did though, being the caring and overly domestic boyfriend he is, but the second the last film finished and you were standing up, saying that the two of you should probably head to bed because of the late night, he suddenly gets a chair from the dining area, placing it in the middle of the living room before pulling you by your hands to go sit on the wooden chair.
“uh, what are you doing?” you ask with a laugh, watching him fetch the tv remote to go on youtube and start typing the words ‘careless whisper’ on the search bar.
“i’m going to give you a good time,” he says.
now, taehyung has always been endearingly peculiar, it’s one of the things you just grew fond of the more you got to know him—but seriously, there were really some times wherein you can’t imagine what might be going around in that pretty little head of his and assume what he might be thinking of.
“didn’t you already do that, babe?”
“no, no,” he hits the play button and the overly familiar tune of the said song fills the living room, making you laugh, “since we already ate dinner and all—” he’s now in front of you, grinning— “are you up for some dessert?”
instead of getting an answer, taehyung begins to dance, at first playfully, swaying his hips and doing shoulder rolls that make you want to tease him due to how it looks like he copied it from someone’s grandfather. he ignores your snickers and whines of disapproval throughout the way, laughter eventually bubbling out of his system too at his silliness, but doesn’t stop, doesn’t let your joking remarks falter his movements, doesn’t let himself get too distracted to not swing along the music.
“are you giving me a lap dance?” you finally guess, your eyes following his hand that he glides from his forehead down to his lips and then to his chest. “is this because of me saying i have a thing for dancers?”
“yep.” taehyung gets your hand now, that grin still on display as he presses it against his torso, sliding it down while he continuously moves to the beat.
you can’t lie, you’re awfully getting turned on the more he works his hips and gets into the music even further.
taehyung undeniably had the moves, the groove, and just the right amount of enthusiasm to make him look like a good dancer if he tried. plus, accompanied now by his teasing gestures, the way he was getting serious in his dancing, no longer playing around or treating it as a joke—he manages to perform even better, causing you to swallow hard when you realize that this was truly becoming real.
“look at me,” he murmurs, tilting your chin up to indeed look at him when you tear your gaze away from his figure to prevent yourself from forming dirtier thoughts.
you flicker your eyes back on him as per command, taehyung abruptly moving closer, his hands going over behind you to hold the backrest of your chair before he spreads his legs and walks even nearer, appearing like he was going to straddle your waist but he doesn’t pin his bottom down yet on your thighs to fully do so.
and then he rocks his hips along the tune again, doing it in a painfully sensual manner that has you sucking in a deep breath, blinking hard and snapping your head to the other way again to avoid him. you hear him chuckle at the movement, feel him sit down by your knees then, and just when you’re about to verbally ask him what exactly does he think he’s doing to you right now—taehyung kisses your lips.
you think you’re lightheaded already, any thought of yours being pushed back and it’s only the sensation of his lips on yours that you bother concentrating on. he reaches behind your head and gently pulls your hair back to expose more of your neck, his mouth slipping towards your jaw and ultimately to your throat, wet kisses lingering on your skin that causes your stomach to drop without warning.
“do you want my shirt off?” he questions, voice sending shivers through your spine.
“ye, yeah.”
“take it off for me then.”
you go look at him again, seeing him grin and with a roll of your eyes, you grab the hem of his shirt, pulling it off him quickly before indulging yourself to the sight of his bare chest and arms, the tip of your fingers drifting down from his shoulder blade to his pecs.
“did you work out?” you wonder out loud as he goes back to kissing your neck, nipping on your skin that shoots something right down your core.
“i might have done like 50 push-ups before you got home.”
you chuckle. “it paid off.” you’re brave enough now to hook an arm around his neck, your other hand caressing his body in appreciation, making sure that you bring attention to his arms too as you run your palm along his bicep. “you look incredibly tasty right now.”
taehyung hums when you attach your mouths together once more, smirking, knowing that his plan tonight definitely worked.
it shows in the eagerness of your kiss, the sneaking of your tongue past his lips, the harsh pull you do as you drag him closer with a finger around his belt loops, and in those actions alone does taehyung get more aroused than he intended to. it was his scheme to turn you on by his attempt at dirty dancing, but why does it seem like he’s enjoying this more than you are?
not to say that you didn’t look as aroused as he was, considering the little noises you’ve been creating and your hand now that was explicitly massaging his bulge.
“fuck,” you moan, his hardness driving you further to the edge, “bedroom. right now.”
taehyung didn’t need to be told twice.
standing up from his position, he crouches back down again just to haul your legs over his hips, an invitation to go ahead, jump, and mount his hips.
you do, laughing hard as taehyung stumbles a bit, and he shuts you up with a kiss, walking towards your shared bedroom in the quickest and safest way he possibly can.
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199 notes · View notes
holdinbacksecrets · 21 days ago
Is it easier to be vulnerable when you’re already naked? 
It’s time to stop running from an honest heart. 
idol!reader and idol!taehyung, a bit suggestive?, fluff
Text alert
 Taehyung: Hey you. What are you doing? 
You: I just got home from the studio xx
Taehyung: Can I see you?
You: Do you want to see me? xx
Taehyung: Would I be asking if I didn’t want to? :)
You: You know where the spare key is. I’m going to take a shower, so let yourself in xx
Taehyung: Ok. Twenty minutes. xx
You: Careful now. That’s my thing xx
Taehyung: What’s left for me?
You: oo of course. See you soon xx
Being together is wrong. 
You repeat the words over and over again in your mind, hoping one day you’ll wake up and find them embedded in you, sharing the space on your pillow, securing a place in your life as a solid choice. Instead, you try over and over again to convince yourself, knowing you’ll never succeed when he’s the one you’re waking up beside. Every time you do, those words grow smaller, more blurry: impossible to believe.
Chills ripple across your skin. Nerves fill your chest with a heaviness as you hear the bathroom door open: a sudden change in temperature. The coolness of your apartment mixing with the hot steam. 
You peek your head out through the curtains, met by a smile. The sweetest damn smile. Taehyung is so handsome, and he’s told you he loves you: a detail your mind won’t let you forget. 
Maybe tonight you’ll finally say it back, instead of weaving the words through all the songs you write, wondering if he’ll accept your heart in a song— no, we aren’t doing that, right? That’s the plan, isn’t it? 
Avoid your honest heart. 
You draw the shower curtain closed when he settles into the space, finding a seat on the tile floor. His back against the white wall. 
“How was your day?” Taehyung asks the question like he really wants to hear your answer: even if it’s bad or simply mundane, because he loves you. 
“It was…. Sometimes, my body is here, but it’s hard to bring my mind out of the studio. Apparently, I have a lot to say.” 
“You always do.” He smiles as his head falls to the side, looking at your clothes laying in a pile on the fluffy rug: peachy clean, it reads. Taehyung recognizes his shirt. Words written in white against the black material. You’ve started to keep as much of him around as you can whenever he’s gone: playing with fire. 
The stream washes away the suds of soap from your skin, the shampoo from your hair, and the cleanser from your face. The water stops with a single turn of the silver handle, and he waits for your hand to appear from behind the curtain, a towel in his grip. 
“Thank you.” 
It’s not until the cotton is wrapped around your naked body that you finally pull the curtain back completely. “Maybe I do, but it’s deciding what’s worth sharing, you know? What people will care about and what’s better left for my journal.” 
“Can I read those pages some day?” 
Your eyes meet, and Taehyung’s are a direct line to his heart, his soul… he’s so easy to see. He lets you know him, and you’ve realized with time, it’s the biggest honor. 
“I’m hoping to tell you some day. I think you deserve that— no, I know you do.” 
Taehyung stands up. Trails a fingertip along your collarbones. His eyes taking in what’s exposed of your skin, but instead of lustful, it’s romantic. He wants you to let him love you, hold you, be with you. Only this… only that… it’s not enough for him. 
“I’m not going anywhere.” 
Is it easier to be vulnerable when you’re already naked? 
Half the battle is already done. 
“Of course. Always. I’m right here.” His eyes soften, and he grins bashfully, “Can you see me?” 
You smile now too, pulling him into an embrace. Mhmm, I do. 
Taehyung always smells the same, and you wouldn’t mind if a piece of him rubs off on you. His scent, his openness.  
He tangles his hands in your wet hair. He senses the coconut in your shampoo. He kisses the side of your neck. barely. His lips graze the skin, and your hold on Taehyung tightens. 
“I’m right here.”
And he is. Every part of Kim Taehyung is right here. 
You’ve already done half the battle, right? 
So, with a deep breath, 
“Taehyung, I love you.” 
You’ve experienced a lot of beautiful in your life, but nothing beats his sudden inhale. The way he freezes before relaxing. The tensity diminishing, disappearing. 
Was it ever there? 
In this moment, you realize he had been holding back, for the sake of making you comfortable. At least until he heard the words— hoping one day he would. 
“I love you. I love you.” Taehyung pulls away to find your eyes, cradle your face between his hands and waits to kiss you until he sees your heart shining through two pots of honey that sparkle and spread his wings. One part of you that makes Taehyung a happier man. 
Bliss is real. 
When you kiss, it’s the first kiss of a new chapter. The chapter of: Ok, this is love. Now we have each other, and it’s for real.
And it’s impossible to be nervous when he’s holding you so gently, yet tight enough to keep you close, present, near, connected.
The only thing keeping your towel up is his chest pressed against your own. Your heart spaces meeting beneath the passion sailing through your lips. Colors of love melting together. The two of you melting together. 
And you melt and melt
Love and love 
Be and be. 
“So we’re doing this?” Taehyung’s question is full of hope, so endearing. 
Your whispered hum is music to his ears. “I guess my restraint is better than I thought.” 
“Oh? So you’ve been holding back?” 
“I turn away sometimes to hide my bedroom eyes.” 
“What song did you steal that from?”
“Just my journal.” 
“That journal holds all your secrets.”
“And you.”
He smooths down your hair. Your bodies together on the bathroom floor, holding your towel closed with a fist. Its dampness seeps through his jeans. 
“Is that surprising to hear? No one sees me the way you do. I choose to be vulnerable. I push my limits with you, and every time I survive.” 
“You’re making it sound painful.” 
You smile, shaking your head. “No, it’s beautiful. Thank you.”
“Hmm? For what, baby?” 
“Helping me see my own strength.” 
It’s time to stop running from an honest heart.
Taehyung’s eyes glimmer. His shoulders fall in the way that only comes when one’s heart is fluttering. He’ll love you forever. 
“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” 
You kiss him again, and again and again. You kiss until goosebumps flood your skin. You kiss until your hair has dried, and the fog has left the bathroom mirror. 
“I’m going to get dressed. Don’t go anywhere.” 
“I’m too in love to leave.” 
Soft lips touch your forehead. You brush his cheek, painting your forever across his skin, before standing to slip through the doorway, existing in the sudden privacy of your coset. 
The towel falls. You clasp your bra, dress in underwear, and a knitted sweater; the cotton sweatpants you love. 
You stay up all night, with Taehyung by your side, kissing in between the new lyrics you write. Seeing a path you had been avoiding becoming so clear, so beautiful, and it’s exactly what you want the world to hear. 
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stayjimin · 6 months ago
i miss you (sent: 2:17am) | kth
pairing: kim taehyung x reader
genre: fluff
warnings: i think there’s one swear
word count: 1.8k
beta reader(s): @taepioka​ @honeytae​
summary: surely you can sleep for one night wihout taehyung, surely you won’t send an i miss you text at two in the morning that results in him coming over anyway
this is for @honeytae​ as an early birthday present i love you kenna!!!
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You had spent a few hours now watching as the time on the clock tick slowly into the early hours of the morning. No matter how hard you tried, no matter how many times you found a comfortable spot on your pillow, you stayed wide awake.
It was the bed, suddenly far too wide without Taehyung’s chest being within the reach of your outstretched palm, too cold without the warmth of his side pressed against yours. And the silence of the room, filled only by the condescending clicking of the wall clock, made you miss the sound of his heavy breathing and the occasional sleepy hum.
You weren’t sure when it became virtually impossible to sleep without Taehyung, when having him next to you under the sheets became more familiar than sleeping alone. If you’re being transparent, you can’t remember too many instances of the latter anyway, at least not in the past month.
You were the one that had suggested he stay at the dorms that night, placing the blame on the pile of work sitting on your desk and the promise of a late-night sorting through it. And you had worked late, fingers typing and head throbbing far past eleven.
The logical part of your brain tries to insist that's the reason why you can't sleep, that's it's the blue light from the screen fucking with you. But you knew better, knew that if he was next to you the blue light wouldn't mean a thing.
The longer you laid in bed awake, the longer you felt like you had to prove to yourself that you could be without him. Of course, you could sleep alone, you could be without him for one night. The weight of his arm around your waist and the feel of his breath on the back of your neck felt like home, but surely you could do without it just this once.
You roll over in the dark to tap at the screen of your phone, letting out a groan at the reminder that it's long past two in the morning now. The phone clicks open to the goodnight text you had gotten from Taehyung hours earlier, the thought of him sleeping soundly without you making your stomach churn more than you would care to admit.
Your fingers take a second to ghost over the keyboard, mind reeling at the different messages you could send while also contemplating tossing your phone to the other side of the bed. All in one go, without giving yourself a chance to take it back, you type and send a text before rolling face-first into the pillows with a huff.
i miss you (sent: 2:17am)
You chew on your lip where it rests against the bed, pulling your arms up underneath the cushion to tuck them underneath the plush of the pillow. The phone still in your hand gets tucked with your hand, screen hidden by the sheets.
You don’t even get to let out another exasperated sigh before the phone starts vibrating in your fingers, shaking the cushion underneath your cheek. You blink at the screen as you pull it in front of your face, heart skipping a beat when you see Taehyung’s name.
“Hi,” you say, a little quiet and a little shy as you sit up and rest against the headboard, your head falling back dramatically and your eyes drooping shut.
“Hi,” he says through the receiver, and you can hear the smile in his voice. “Why are you awake, love?” he prods. 
Your chest tightens at his question, and you pull your legs into your stature, firmly wrapping your arms around your knees. “Why are you?” you avoid his question, trying to suppress your grin at the simple fact that you’re talking to him.
He lets out a small laugh, a light sound that carries through the phone and makes you bite at the grin spreading on your face. “Touché,” he says through a chuckle, “but I asked you first.”
You let out a sigh, pulling at the leggings that clothe your knees, plucking pieces of lint off the fabric. “I just couldn’t sleep,” you say finally, quietly, your body sliding down the headboard slightly. “Now you.”
You can hear him move around on his bed, assuming he’s shifting in the same sort of ways that you are. “Same, I guess,” he adds, his voice trailing off. There’s silence for a few seconds as you continue to rub at the curve of your legs. “It’s weird sleeping without you,” he continues suddenly, his voice coming through the receiver with a new sort of fervor. “Can I come over?”
You let out a breath you didn’t realize you had been holding, some of the tension leaving the blades of your shoulders as they settle down against the sheets a little more. “Yes, please,” you say, hardly even embarrassed by the pleading nature of your voice.
The sounds coming from his end tell you he’s standing up from his bed and moving towards the door. “Okay, I’m leaving now,” he says, his voice a little breathy as you hear the rattle of his keys. “I’m gonna hang up but I’ll be there shortly, angel,” he promises.
“Okay, Tae,” you reply. The line goes dead and you tuck the phone against the curve of your chest, sliding down and folding the comforter over your head as you wait for the fluttering of your heart to subside.
When it feels like your head is back on your shoulders and no longer in the cloudy dream-like state at the thought of his rush over to your apartment, you push yourself up from your bed and run to unlock the front door. Your feet pad quickly against the hardwood, the cold flooring causing your bare toes to curl and forcing you to rush back to the warmth of the comforter.
the door is unlocked <3 (sent: 2:34am)
You thought the time was moving slowly before, but the expectancy of waiting for the front door to swing open made it feel like time was flying before your call. You fold yourself into the sheets, pulling the blankets under the tip of your nose, and listen to the unsteady rhythm of your breathing and the quickening of your heart rate. Taehyung tended to have this effect on you, usually made your palms a little clammy and your head a little dizzy.
The door opens after what feels like an eternity, and you listen attentively as Taehyung fastens the lock behind him, his own feet moving quicker than yours to the door of your bedroom.
He slides himself under the comforter and latches onto you before you have time to think, limbs tangling with yours as he pulls you into his chest. “Hi,” he says as he tightens his arms around your waist, your head falling against his collarbone as his lips pepper kisses into your hairline.
“Hi,” you say back, your smile evident in your voice as you wrap your own arms around his stature. The tightness of your muscles caused by your inability to fall asleep dissipates completely as you feel the weight of his body under the press of your cheek, eyes fluttering shut at the release of the stress.
“I missed you too,” Tae says in reply to the text you sent earlier, voice slightly muffled as he continues to fold kisses against your hair.
You hum in response, words failing you momentarily as you shift slightly to press your own lips against the column of his throat, chaste and quick and feather-light, his skin warm against your mouth despite the chill of your room. There’s a comfortable silence that momentarily fills the air, the two of you pressing the occasional kiss against any skin that your lips could reach.
“I couldn’t sleep without you,” you say finally, your voice a little quiet and hesitant, the confession for yourself just as much as it was for him. “The bed was too big,” you continue. “Everything felt weird. I missed you too much.” You wrap your limbs tighter with his, tucking your head a little more against his chest, the words making you want to hide.
“Hey, angel,” he coos as he feels you retract slightly, “look at me.” He combs his hands through your hair and tucks the strands behind your ears as you rest your chin against his sternum to peer up at him. Your breath catches in your throat as he smiles down at you, ducking his head to press a kiss to the tip of your nose. “I laid awake for hours because I couldn’t stop thinking about how you weren’t asleep next to me,” he says, his tone reaffirming and steady. “I was so relieved when you sent that text,” he continues. “I missed you too, probably more.”
You beam back at him, pursing your lips as you consider his words, consider the way your stomach flutters. “That’s doubtful,” you tease, fingers moving to smooth up the curve of his jaw. “I missed you a whole lot.”
“Hmm,” he murmurs, his own finger running down the bridge of your nose. “Are we gonna argue about who sulked more right now?” He pinches your chin, thumb brushing against your bottom lip.
You let out a laugh, lips puckering to kiss the pad of his finger where it rests against your mouth. “No, no,” you reply, shifting up his form so your face is above his. He leans up to catch your lips in his before you have the chance to do the same, his mouth molding against yours lovingly as his palm cups at your jaw. You pull away far too soon, pressing another innocent kiss against his cheek. “What we're gonna do,” you continue, brushing some strands of hair away from his forehead, “is go to sleep.”
He chuckles, his lips pressing against yours in one final peck before he pulls you back into his chest. “I like that plan,” he says as you nuzzle your cheek against his shoulder.
And you want to murmur the three words that sit at the tip of your tongue, the confession of emotions that you know will be inevitable soon, but you swallow them down. They’re not for three am, not for a sleepless night and the aftermath of an “i miss you” text. Maybe you’re naive for thinking they deserve something special, but you suppress them nonetheless.
You love Taehyung, but that’s for later. Right now, with his arms holding you firmly against his frame, your eyes, finally, finally, fall shut, and sleep overtakes you.
And all your dreams are full of him.
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delightfulserendipity · 6 months ago
Prettier || kth
↔Genre: romance; fluff; boyfriend!taehyung x girlfriend!reader.
↔Warnings: lots of playful banter.
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The steady patter of the water ceased it's calming continuity to bring your eyes away from the book you were meant to read with your boyfriend and place themselves his handsome features.
But instead of his boundless energy thriving upon your excitement of seeing him, your heart jumped at the unexpected and effortless beauty he possessed.
Even with water dripping into his dark eyes, he proved himself to be even more deserving of no less than ethereal.
His honey- gold skin glistened with droplets of water from his shower that had yet to dry as his tousled hair curled upon his forehead.
He seemed relaxed after he had reluctantly dragged his body away from your own to step under the steady stream of heat, after nearly an hour of attempting to entice you to join him.
You hungrily followed the liquid which explored his skin, eagerly consuming his body just as you wished to this very second rather than bask in the relaxing night you had planned with him.
Lost to your reveries, a low chuckle beckoned your return to reality, "my eyes are up here, love."
Your jaw nearly dropped before you cleared your throat suddenly at his mischievous grin.
If he hadn't found your unabashed staring so amusing and rather adorable, the heat of your cheeks would have led you to bury them into the plush pillows and away from his sight.
But your eyes were drawn to his as he followed the pull of your body, to carefully place himself upon your waiting lap to hum at the feeling of your fingers grazing his scalp.
"It's not fair." you pouted, your fingers lightly toying with the shining dark locks of your lover.
His brows furrowed at your sudden huff before his features pulled into the grin you loved so much as his eyes shone beneath you, as if you sat atop the moon to peer into the twinkling bodies which accompanied her.
"What is, baby?" His lithe form tugged around you, to trap you within a mess of his long legs and strong arms that pulled you into his chest, where you contentedly listened to the steady thrum of his heart.
Your bottom lip poked out lightly with your theatrics and your fingers walked up his taut biceps to softly drag your nails of the dip of his throat.
"My boyfriend is so much prettier than me."
You teasingly forced a huff past your nostrils before tenderly grazing his warm lips just to leave him chasing after your kiss.
"I think he may even be the prettiest being to ever walk the earth." You prodded, a sly grin gracing your features once he burned crimson before you.
His body shifted lightly in your arms before he bounded your hands with his slender fingers, like a soft string to curl around your wrists to halt the gentle caresses that fluttered his heart.
"Not true," he reprimanded your joyous self, as if to scold you for such fibs.
"My girlfriend is much prettier," he countered, intriguing you with his words as his eyes lathed over your face. The tension of his restraint he practiced to halt himself from taking your lips right then was felt in every flick of his gaze.
"I live to hear her pretty voice and laughter, no matter how ugly she thinks it is." He confessed like a small child admitting an innocent wrong.
You gasped lightly at his bragging of you- his love before you tried to inch away from the flustered heat he warmed you with, only for his lithe form to follow and simply hold you closer.
"It's nearly impossible to not stare into her pretty eyes or simply lay by her side and whisper of how she surpasses the word pretty."
You couldn't help but smile in his arms, let alone in his presence as your fingers lightly tugged upon his fluffy hair to elicit an appeased hum from him.
In the little space he allowed, you bathed in the warmth that rolled off of his dampened body and took in the comfort of his smell. A little of your favorite soap and his signature scent that left you gasping.
"I love the way her arms hug me so perfectly- and how pretty she is in everything she does."
He was confident he could recite the list of his adorations for you forever, but the desire to pull you into his kiss was far greater than his own resolve.
Tentatively, his lips met your jaw as if he grazed the finest porcelain and a mere breath would shatter all he held dear.
You giggled lightly once his hot breath tickled your flesh and his lips met yours at last.
It was only after he basked in his time with you, and savored every slow flick of his tongue or chuckled at every bump of your noses, did he depart from you at last to find he was pleased by your breathless and amazed expression.
"My girlfriend is much prettier."
Even though your appearance was no greater than any, his love made you fell as if you were the heavens in his eyes. And to him, you were this and more.
Tag list: @holaaaf @stayforarmy @yourwonderbelle
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springalwayscomes · 2 months ago
필요한 손 - The hands you need
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Plot: These days are tough. Your nail artist exam is getting closer and even though you have everything under control you can’t seem to control yourself from stressing. Thankfully, tonight Taehyung came home before you and instead of just taking a shower and sink in your bed - as he could perfectly do after rehearsing for more than eleven hours - he made you dinner. And he’s willing to help you with your exam too, with his hands.
Pairing: Taehyung x Reader
Genre: Fluff, Smut, Established Relationship,
Wordcount: 2.7k
Content Warning: fingering, cunnilingus, cum eating
Author’s Note: I hope you’ll like this. It’s short but warm as homemade tea in winter… I haven’t posted this year and honestly I don’t want to pressure myself because I feel like good results won’t come if I do that. A part of me wants to say something more about what’s coming but another part doesn’t because I’m afraid I will end up with not finish what I‘m doing it and say things that won’t come true. Just know I’ve been working on something very long since February and it’s still in writing process. I hope it will turn out good and that I’ll get to publish it! In the meanwhile I leave this one here. I hope you are enjoying your holidays and that everyone is safe and healthy💜
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Today’s been a long day. Both stressful and productive, one of those days that make it hard to understand which of the two worlds describes it better, if awful or good. Your nail artist exam is close and the stress is starting to get to you even though you’ve been studying and seem to know everything you need to and have everything already under control. That’s why you can’t help but feel released when you arrive home and open the door. The lights are on, which means Taehyung came home before you and is probably cooking dinner while humming to one of his favorite songs. These days he’s obsessed with Stand By Me, he sings it under the shower, hums it before he falls asleep and lowly as he caresses your cheeks at night. Sometimes he would sing it looking straight into your eyes and your heart would skip some beats as you wonder what you did to deserve him. These thoughts are the ones who first welcome you back home and let you exhale a deep breath. The day is over, finally, or at least outside.
«Tae, I’m home!» you slightly raise your tone to make him hear you from the kitchen, you can already hear him sing, but it’s one of his songs. It’s probably still stuck in his head after he’s been rehearsing the whole day.
He doesn’t miss a second, his face comes out of the corner and gives you one of his boxy smiles that make your heart throb even after all the time you’ve been together, eyes lighting up at your sight.
He lets out a groan of release and raises his eyebrows.
«Come here, hurry up» and he’s back in the kitchen. You lick your lips and leave your coat, purse and shoes in the hall before you do as he says. After this type of day all you want is to spend some time with him. Taehyung is bending towards the oven, putting inside the oven dish, red pot holders hiding his beautiful hands that you’ve been thinking about for the whole day. You wait for him to shut the oven, and all you can do right after is hug him so tight from behind that he finds it hard to breathe at the beginning, nuzzling your face into the back of his shoulder. Taehyung opens his mouth to say something but closes it right after. He just smiles as he listens to your breath, his hands still covered with the pot holders reaching yours on his waist.
«Are you tired?» he lovely asks. You can hear it from his voice how much he hates it when you stress out and overwork yourself, but it’s that type of hate that makes him want to take even more care of you. You nod against him, the part of his sweater where you’re hiding is starting to become very hot because of your continue breathing. His hands wrap around yours before he realizes he still has the holders on, so he quickly removes them and lets them fall on the counter.
His warm hands are the softest skin you ever touched and felt against yours, that’s the same thought you had since the first time he touched you and it’s still the one that’s stuck in your mind every time he touches you, and feeling them on your hands makes you melt. He guides your hand towards his lips, leaving a soft peck on the back and one on each finger as he unfolds your other arm from his waist with his free hand. Instead, he intertwines his fingers with yours and guides you in front of him, holding you against him just as tight as you did with him before. His waist is totally joined to yours and his eyes are totally stuck into yours.
«I made you pizza» he whispers. His breath hits your face as he speaks and you look at him.
«Pizza? How long have you been home? You rehearsed for more than eleven hours you-»
«You’re not even thanking me» he instantly pouts. A cute habit of his, it gets you every time.
«Thank you so much» you whisper back, pecking his lips. Finally, you’re home. You can say it officially after you kissed him. Taehyung smiles against you and hugs you tighter, hugging you totally to him.
«Please don’t stress yourself» he lowly lets go. You close your eyes and let him guide your head onto his chest as you both slowly swing, something you do from time to time.
«It’s just because of this exam» you justify.
«I know. But please-» he stops himself to caress your hair and to reformulate the sentence.
«I can help you study tonight if you want» he pecks your forehead. You shake your head. You want to practice tonight.
«Tonight I need your hands»
Silence falls in the kitchen and Taehyung’s eyes widen for a second, he smirks right after.
«My hands?» he lowly asks. You nod and raise your head to look at him.
By the way he’s smiling you guess he didn’t quite get what you’re saying, you’d dare to say that he totally missed what you’re taking about, but when you try to open your mouth he doesn’t let you speak.
«Okay, you can do it» he nods, bringing his hand in front of his face just to watch it.
«Do you want me to be your model at the exam?» he quietly proposes. Your mouth is still hanging open, not because of the question but because you thought he totally misunderstood.
«There are some of your fans in my class and they don’t know we’re-»
«I’ll take pictures with them. If you want me there, otherwise-»
«Don’t you have to ask Bang-»
«I already did today. He said it’s okay. I didn’t know if you had a model so I asked anyway, just in case» he smiles at you.
This is one of the reasons why you love this man. Taehyung is your source of happiness, hope and everything that makes you go on. He takes care of you just like you do with him, you guide each other when you’re lost and walk hand to hand when you both know the road. You collaborate and respect each other, trust and relay on each other.
«Nomunomu saranghae» you let go. His smile grows even bigger, his eyes shine just like stars in a deep dark night, forehead touching yours.
«I love it more when you tell me in Korean» he whispers.
«I’m gonna have to say it more then» you smile.
Taehyung is lost, totally. You have a power over him that he’s not able to control, and all he can do is give in. His lips touch yours and finally welcome a real kiss, one where your tongues meet and you melt into each other, strongly and passionately, but a loving type of passion. One that softly whispers “Saranghae”, infinitely, and “I’m gonna take care of you”, and again “You’re my home”.
Taehyung licks the petals of his lips right after you part, leaving his tongue in the left corner of his lips, hanging out just a little from between his teeth as he softly bites it. It makes you hold your breath and he sees it, as clearly as water. Your foreheads are against each other one more time, and he brings a strand of your hair behind your ear.
«Can I take care of you now? With my hands?» his whisper is so low that it’s almost impossible to hear, but you heard it anyway. As loud as a bomb, and your cheeks heating up are already showing it.
«Release all your stress…» he kisses the corner of your lips.
«Let me help you, love»
You give up right away. There’s no need in faking it, you already gave up at the beginning of his question and all you can do is nod and welcome his touch. Taehyung smiles at you and guides you to the chair, kneeling down on the floor as he opens your pants and helps you with them and your panties too. His hands look so big on you and it makes you even more aroused than you already are. And the way he looks at you, gosh you swear you’ve never seen something so beautiful. He makes promises only with his eyes just by looking at you, and he’s willing to respect every single one of them.
He promises he’s going to be by your side every time you need him and every time you don’t. He promises he’s going to give you all he can and more. He promises he’s going to marry you.
He promises he’s going to love you forever. He promises he’s going to respect and take care of you for forever. He promises he’s going to have a family with you. He promises that his arms are always going to be your hideout from the world. He promises you that he’s always going to put you first, before him.
He promises you he’s going to make you feel good, now in this moment and forever. He promises you he’s going to make you come and release all the tension and the stress building up inside your body.
He leaves kisses on your tights and caresses on every part of your skin, love on every millimeter. He kisses your mound, and your inner thigh making you shiver. And then he starts, slow and consuming, fire and oxygen. Every touch makes you want more, squirm more, moan more. And Taehyung can’t get enough of it, not even close. He promises with his eyes that he’s going to make you cum so good that you’re going to want another one. And he’s totally willing to give it to you, even more if you want.
«Does it feel good like this?» he asks lowly, husky voice and heavy breath as he massages your clit just the way you love. You nod, opening your eyes just to see him look at you with those eyes of his that make you feel totally safe and welcomed. Ready to give you love, as much as you want and need and even willing to remain with nothing left for him.
«You’re so beautiful» he whispers, kissing your clit. It makes you moan deeply and without control, and the action makes him chuckle. The air coming out of his mouth hits you and you end up guiding his face towards you, basically begging for his lips.
Taehyung smiles, helping you open your legs more and immediately giving in and drowning in you. He sucks, kisses, plays with you in all the ways he can, massaging your thighs as he glances up at your face.
«Tae, I’m-»
«Let me help you more»
You don’t have time to understand what he said, two of his long fingers make their way inside you and all you can do is bite your lips to fight the loudest moan you’ve ever let out. Taehyung sucks your clit, the feeling makes you feel like you’re about to faint, he moves his tongue on it at the same time and you really think you’re in paradise. What you did to deserve him, you don’t know. He’s just as desperate to see you, to make you come and it makes you die inside and born again from love and desire, passion. He moans when he lets go of you with a dull wet sound, looking at you again as you stand on the edge of the cliff. His nose is wet with you, and the sight makes you clench around his fingers.
«Nae sarang» he lowly moans griping.
«Cum jagi, make me happy nae sarang»
He sucks your clit again and you totally let go. Your climax hits you so hard that you can’t do anything else but shake as Taehyung keeps moving his fingers inside you and raises on his knees to kiss your hips. His arm comes behind your back, hugging you as he keeps moving and then kisses your forehead and your lips.
«Saranghae» he whispers.
«Saranghae» you say back. «I knew you thought about this when I told you I needed your hands» you chuckle. Taehyung laughs and finally takes out his fingers from you, drenched and totally wrapped in your juices and cum. He taps them on your lips and gives you one, waiting for you to open them and welcome him inside your mouth. You suck yourself off it, knowing that Tae loves when you do it, especially from his fingers. He smiles as he watches you, waiting for you to end so that he can taste you on his middle finger as if the whole meal he had until now wasn’t already enough.
«Thank you for this» you say as he brings his finger to his mouth. Taehyung shakes his head.
«Thank me more after dinner» he even winks, and you end up bursting in laughter. He licks his finger and then kisses your lips again, passionately and lovely just like before, and he promises one more thing. He’s going to be whatever you want him to be. Your stress release, your shoulder to cry on, the person you’re going to hate the most and also the one you’re going to love the most. He wants to be all he can for you, just like you for him. He wants to love you in all the possible ways and wants you to do the same.
«TaeTae» you call him when he’s back down on his knees to raise your panties and pants. His head raises to watch you and your fingers caress his hair.
«Jinjja nomunomu saranghae, nae sarang»
«Nomunomu saranghae» he smiles again. A second later his eyes are wide open as if he just saw a ghost.
«Pija!» he almost screams, immediately getting up to check the pizza in the oven. You watch him let out a relieved breath as you fix your panties.
«Let me do it, I like doing it.» he pouts at you when he turns around.
«The pizza is fine, it’s not burnt. Why did you put this on already, I wanted to do it!» he whines as you stop touching your clothes. Taehyung smiles seeing you surrender so fast.
«Let me do it»
It’s really a thing he likes to do, dress you up. He does it all the time when you make love in winter. You’re always worn out or too lazy to get up and wear clothes and it’s not even a problem since you have his arms around you and the covers, but he gets up and puts you his shirt and your panties on - sometimes even his boxers-. He likes to take care of you in ways that no one could ever. It makes him feel even more grateful to have you. Sometimes you’d just stay laying in bed naked for the rest of the night and Taehyung would be enough to warm you up and make you feel at home.
«After dinner can I do your nails?» you ask. You lift your hips to help him with your pants and he answers with a nod but stops right after.
«Don’t they hurt if I-» your laugh is impossible to hold back at the sight of his long index and middle finger together, he moves them as if they’re entering inside you one more time.
«I don’t know if-»
«Tae!» you can’t control your laugh and Taehyung ends up pouting again.
«Don’t make fun of me» he whines.
«I’m not- thank you for worrying, baby» you smile at him when you regain your control.
«It was just unexpected» you chuckle.
«Don’t they, though?»
«We’ll remove them right after» you smile at him.
«Oh, okay» he pecks your forehead as he goes back to close your pants.
«Tae» you call.
«Thank you, jinjjaro» you really are thankful. For everything he does for you, for taking care of you and cooking you pizza when he could’ve just taken a shower and lay down in bed since he’s been rehearsing for the whole day, for helping you let go of your stress, for reminding you that you have someone to count on who’s willing to help you always, for making you happy.
«I just need you, I don’t need anything or anyone else» you whisper. Taehyung’s arms wrap around you as he places between your legs, still kneeling on the floor.
«I need you too. Just you.» he lovely whispers back, cutely brushing your nose with his.
«I love you, jagiya. Saranghae.»
83 notes · View notes
xpeachesncream · 6 months ago
witcher taehyung | one shot
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NOTICE ! ! SEEKING A WITCHER to help destroy a beast within the elvish ruin off of the town's dirt road. please meet at the cottage past the inn and towards lake portreau, you won't miss the gold ornament hanging from the tree in front. reward will be in coins.
summary: taehyung takes on a job to destroy a beast within the elvish ruins, but isn't aware that the notice was put up by you, the sorceress that he truly despises.
pairing: sorceress!reader x witcher!taehyung
genre: witcher au, fantasy au | smut, very light sprinkle of fluff
words: 6.9k
warnings: cussing, mature language/implied sexual content, use of swords, killing/murder, mentions of killing/murder, use of magic/spells/bombs, use of portals, unprotected sex, shower sex, slightly rough sex, hair pulling, oral (f. receiving), sprinkle of a handjob, doggy style, taehyung is a little weakyweak for miss y/n
note: going to take a stab at this genre, so please be easy on me! it's not my strongest at all but i'm trying to get better. if you are familiar with the witcher lore or anything regarding the witcher, please know that i'm not gonna follow timelines, rules or anything of the sort strictly. we're gonna be in our own universe with a new generation of witchers, so some rules may be bended or there might be things that originally go against the "witcher code." i may drop familiar names, weapons, bombs/potions and towns/villages though. enjoy!
tags: @miinoongi​
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golem - mindless matter brought to life by a spell; they obey their creator's orders without question. once provoked, they will not tire of battle until they have either crushed their opponent or themselves crumbled into dust.
witcher senses - superhuman senses that allow witchers to see clues and tracks that no other human can see/pick up on.
igni sign - one of the 5 simple, magical signs witchers can use; causes a burst of fire that can repel and ignite opponents, as well as start fires.
yrden sign - one of the 5 simple, magical signs witchers can use; blocks the monsters from getting closer, scaring them off. if a hostile being enters the area affected by sign, it is visibly slowed down, and non-corporeal forces become corporeal.
drowners - watery creatures that embody the spirits of those who can not rest after death and are sometimes born of fetuses aborted by magical means.
fiend - a beast that likely resembles a deer but its size resembles more a barn. fiends also have a third eye which they use to hypnotize its opponents
dragon’s dream bomb - releases a cloud of flammable gas which causes a destructive explosion when ignited.
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Taehyung lets down his hood as he snatches the letter off of the notice board. He hums to himself as he folds the piece of paper, tucking it deep into the pocket of his leather pants. He looks around, the villagers looking at him with expressions mixed of awe and fear.
It's been years since the rebirth of the witchers and its witcher schools. This new generation, this new breed of witchers, were more disciplined (in most aspects), trained, skilled, and intimidating, yet charming. However, people still managed to look down on witchers, carrying their assumptions and stereotypes along with them. People truly believed witchers didn't belong, and that they were just dangerous mutants - out to kill. In which, they weren't entirely wrong, however, most witchers were bred to be monster slayers. Not all witchers killed humans. In fact, it was against the witcher code to do so, but certain schools relished in being able to kill anything and everything that got in their way. Witchers didn't care though. You could say whatever you wanted about them and they wouldn't find a need to explain themselves to you, nor did they feel a need to correct you.
If you thought they were strictly killers and scoundrels, so be it.
However, for Taehyung and the school of the wolf, humans weren't in their interest. He's worked hard on his craft and skill to slay monsters and beasts that plagued the towns and villages, learning from the teachings written by Geralt of Rivia and Vesemir. If anything, he was here to help. But obviously, people didn't necessarily look at it that way. He was kept to himself, quiet. He was taller than most men, long, wavy black bangs draping his yellow cat eyes that glowed faintly. All witchers had yellow eyes - it was how humans differentiated witchers from the rest, along with their armor and the specific weapons they carried. Taehyung had looks that could kill, a stare so sharp and intimidating that people wouldn't dare cross his path.
Taehyung carries along, passing through the remaining part of the village, completely ignoring the looks and whispers of the women and men outside of their cottages.
"It's a witcher! I've never seen a witcher come through these grounds b'fore." A women says, hanging up her wet laundry on the line. "Boy! Get back here and stay out of the witcher's way! You don't know what he's capable of!" She yells as her son runs over to Taehyung, but stops in her tracks to avoid confrontation. Taehyung simply looks down at the boy, probably about 6 in age and gives him a small smirk.
"What's your name?" He crouches down to the boy and holds out his gloved hand, his two swords almost hanging off of his shoulder.
"Graham." His tiny hand falls on top of his. "I'd like to be like you, witcher." Taehyung chuckles.
"That's a big ask, Graham." He does a small nod before looking over at his mother, worry filling her expression and body language. "You should head back to your mom, kid. Don't want her to think I'll be eating you for dinner." Taehyung jokes as he stands and watches the boy run back to his mother. His mother gives him a good spanking on the bottom as she's yelling for him to get inside the house and stay inside the house because witchers are dangerous.
Taehyung carries about his business, following the directions of the notice tucked into his pocket. The walk past the inn after the village isn't too bad, but Taehyung definitely wished he could pinpoint the cottage and fast travel. His body had taken a beating just yesterday from slaying a fiend that took shelter at an abandoned village nearby, but he knew he needed to continue his duties in order to get paid. The lake comes into his view, sun shining heavily onto the surface, gleaming brightly and blinding his vision for a quick minute. Indeed, he spots the huge tree that sits near the front of the cottage, a gold ornament in the shape of a mockingbird hanging low on a branch.
Taehyung raises his hand and uses his knuckles to knock on the door a little loudly. He stands back, his cloak and his vest feeling heavy on his body under the sun. Once the door swings open, he shuts his eyes and tilts his head back in disbelief, instantly annoyed that it's you standing there.
"You have got to be fucking kidding me." He groans.
"Perfect, just exactly who I was looking for." You responded sarcastically.
"You should really put your name on these notices."
"Why, it's not like anybody cares like you do."
"Ah, correction. No, no." He chuckles sarcastically as he waves his hand to dismiss your statement. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves here. I don't care. It's just nice to give people a heads up and let them know the person they'd be dealing with is the problematic sorceress from Vengerberg." You raise your eyebrow and cross your arms. Problematic? Taehyung was definitely the only person who thought you were problematic and that's because he hated the fact that he had feelings for you. You drew him in since the first day you met at the pub, fucking each other's brains out that same night and not speaking a word to each other after that. It was the same routine - you'd see each other, fuck, then leave like it just a typical thing in your every day lives. He hated your snarky, snobby attitude, and he hated how fucking sexy you were, swaying your hips in those tight clothes you always wore. He hated that you were the most sought out sorceress being that you were only one of few left, and the most powerful of all. He hated that you played mind games, and that he only wanted you more and more every time he crossed paths with you.
He fucking hates you because he loves you.
However, you felt the same. He was the finest fucking witcher you have ever seen, and his deep voice alone was enough to make your pussy throb. The only difference is that you knew how to stand your ground. You just weren't weak like Taehyung. You'd play hard to get and fuck around until he couldn't take it. Until he crumbled. It boosted your ego, and you loved every minute of seeing him squirm. You loved showing him that a witcher could be powerless.
"Do you want the job or not, witcher?" He groans and kicks the dirt beneath his boots.
"Ifuckingguess." He mumbled, his words meshing together.
"I thought so." You roll your eyes and step aside for him to walk in. He throws his cloak down onto the bench near the front door and stretches, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room that made up your kitchen and dining area.
"What are you even doing here in Velen? I thought you were in Toussaint."
"You thought wrong." You turn to look at him as you throw a bag onto the table. "And even if I was, why are you even keeping tabs on me?"
"I'm not, word just travels fast when it comes to Miss Y/N."
"Whatever Taehyung, you're the only witcher I know that has a big ass mouth."
"Oooookay, off to a great start I see." He says sarcastically and sighs heavily. "Can you just tell me what you need so we can get this over with?" He towered over you as he came closer.
"Hm." You hummed, looking up at his plump, pink lips then back up to his yellow eyes. "There's a golem housing itself in the elvish ruins. The good ol' Elves are trying to preserve those ruins, and they can't even come close to it since the golem has been tucking himself away in there. He literally destroys what's around him and will kill anything that comes near. Can't exactly pinpoint what or who it's tied to."
"Aren't golems weak to your magic? Why can't you just do it yourself?"
"If I could do it by myself, I wouldn't have put up the notice, right?" You rolled your eyes. "I caught a glimpse of him when I pulled up a projection of the ruins. He's fucking huge. I need a witcher's touch to help weaken him."
"Nice to hear that you need me."
"I said a witcher, not you specifically Taehyung." He smirks.
"And look who's here. Isn't it just beautiful how meant to be we are?"
"Shut up." You shake your head as he slightly chuckles. "I need some ingredients first though, we can't go in there without any bombs and potions on hand, just in case." You shove the bag against his chest.
"Ingredients?" You hold up the list between your middle finger and index finger.
"Go get 'em, wolf."
"Are you shitting me? I go after monsters and shit, I don't fucking prance around in the meadow looking for fruits and flowers."
"Today you will." He groans.
"It's hot." He whines.
"Then go take a break in the shade." You scoff. "There's not even a ton of ingredients on there, Taehyung."
"What are you gonna do then, sit around and sip on tea while I'm working hard out there?"
"Yeah, sure." You smirk as he glares at you. "Chop, chop. We have a golem to go after."
"I'll remember this." He snaps as he walks out and unintentionally slams the door due to his witcher strength. You giggle before biting your bottom lip and proceeding to create the bombs and potions you could make with what you already had on hand.
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"Here." He walks in, throwing the bag onto the table. "Your shit."
"Hey, this is for you too, you know."
"I think I can handle myself pretty well." You run your finger down his neck, a light scar trailing towards his collarbone.
"You sure about that?" He grabs your hand and gently brushes it off.
"Yeah." He stares you down for a second before pulling back. "How many more do you need to make with all this?"
"Probably 4. Sit tight. You need water or anything?"
"Mmm, no. I don't think I'm parched after being out there for awhile." He says sarcastically with a stupid ass smile on his face. You fill up a cup of water from the tap and press it against his chest.
"You're annoying." He simply drinks the water and looks at you.
"So, what has else Miss Y/N been up to? Besides fucking other witchers?"
"Uh?" You snort. "And you're one to talk when you slide your dick into every pussy that passes you by."
"Mm, not every pussy. Just some. I'm very selective." He winks and smirks cockily. He's not gonna lie, he has fucked a few ladies, but he's also gonna be honest and say he did it was an outlet. Sexual frustration. Frustration overall cause he couldn't always have you with these games you've been playing. "How was the crane witcher? Or, was it the viper witcher?"
"None of your business."
"Okay, whatever." He chuckles.
"Jealousy looks so good on you, Taehyung. Please. Do more." You jokingly plead.
"Fuck off, Y/N."
"Anyways, to answer your question, I've really just been hiding out here. Not fucking other witchers." He snorts.
"Alright. But, hiding out? Why?"
"Can't I just take time to myself without people being all up on my ass about shit?"
"I guess. Why Velen though?"
"It's quiet, and small. And I thought I could avoid most people, like you for example."
"You don't mean that, sweetheart." He jokes.
"Don't call me that." You roll your eyes even though the pet name rolling off of Taehyung's tongue makes your heart flutter. "Besides, you're the one who caught an attitude earlier. So who exactly is mad?" You size him up and down. He watches as you mix the ingredients for the last bomb and pack it away in your shoulder bag.
"Not mad. Just trying to get on with my business without any distractions."
"Okay, Taehyung." You slightly chuckle. "You ready to go?"
"I suppose. How far is it?"
"Not too far, but—" You raise your hands in front of you, a small spark of light building into a fairly large-sized portal in front of you. "We can head through the portal." His head drops as he sighs.
"Fuck, you know I hate portals."
"You use 'em anyway!" You furrow your brows because what the fuck is he even saying? He uses portals every chance he gets with his lazy witcher ass. "Suit yourself, I'll meet you there then."
"I'm coming!" He says lowly, following right behind you as you step through the light, the portal transporting you directly in front of the elvish ruins. "Ugh, my stomach."
"Suck it up, you big baby." He shakes off the feeling while you're already heading through the narrow stone walkway, leading deeper into the ruins.
The ruins are cold, wet and an odd odor lingers in the air. You assume it's from the golem making itself comfortable here, a sour look on your face creeping up the deeper you walk into the space. You look back to check on Tae, his eyes brighter in the dark. His brows are furrowed as he looks around.
"He's definitely deeper down in the pits of the ruins, you know that right?" He says, his witcher senses probably picking up the strong scent and the slightest sound from miles away. "My thing is, why is it here and who brought him to life?"
"Yeah, I know. If we need to, I'll have us jump through portals. But, that's exactly why we should walk through the ruins ourselves so we should make sure nothing else is in here." He sighs, still looking around. "Eep! What the fuck!" You squeal, your hands immediately wrapping around Taehyung's long arm. He looks down to see the rats brushing past your feet and the fear on your face.
"You're the most powerful sorceress out there, Y/N. Blast them away with your magic ball thingies."
"No! I hate rats, I don't want anything to do with them! Please just get rid of them Taehyung!" You whine, almost crying and crawling up his body at this point, causing him to shake his head and raise his hand to make use of his Igni sign. You hang tightly as you watch fire blast out into the environment, immediately turning all rats in the vicinity to ash.
"Happy, princess?"
"Thank you." You took a breath and dusted yourself off.
"Maybe we should make use of those portals now."
"No, we need to do this Taehyung." You respond, heading down the stairs to descend deeper onto another floor of the ruins. "Something is tied to that golem, there's no doubt." He nods silently. Something already didn't sit right with him and he knew that golem wasn't alone. Whatever it was though, he'd be ready. He'd be ready to face off and protect you, if need be.
You both head down another level, a good layer of water covering the cement floor, causing sounds of puddles and wet shoes to echo off of the stone walls.
"Can you walk any quieter?" Taehyung says lowly behind you.
"Can you? You're the bigger one here, witcher."
"Shh." He shushes you, his hand out to signal complete silence. You stare at his glowing eyes, wandering around the large, empty space. Suddenly, he abruptly gets in front of you, immediately drawing his sword forward and out, slicing a drowner in half before it could get to you. He smirks down at you, but it quickly fades when you hear the sounds of splashing water from more drowners rushing over to the both of you. There's about 5 more coming your way, Taehyung is dealing with them individually through the use of his Igni sign. They're swarming him, and although it's quite attractive to see him move the way he's moving alone, you need him on the rest of this mission and you can't allow him to get hurt.
"Move!" You yell, causing him to look over his shoulder and duck to the side as soon as you throw a dragon's dream bomb, quickly provoking it and igniting it with your own burst of flame afterwards. Taehyung still doesn't understand the mechanics of your power, but he doesn't underestimate you.
"You know, as much as I despise you, that was pretty hot." He says as he walks back over to you, smirking as he bites his bottom lip.
"Please." You slightly chuckle as you push him away and continue walking down the path. "You don't hate me. You're just weak and can't accept your own feelings."
"Don't ever call me weak." He almost growls as he follows you down the steps to the next level of  the ruins. You smirk to yourself at the fact that you're already poking at his weak spot, but you don't say anything else. The stench has gotten worse, signaling that you two have most likely gotten closer to the golem.
"Fucking christ." You say as you swipe the air back and forth in front of you.
"He's right past that corridor." Taehyung points at the door at the end with the tip of his sword. You continue walking down, until he stops you once again. "Wait."
"What?" You turn to look at him.
"These sure as hell aren't your footsteps." He bends down to swipe the floor. He takes the dirt on the tip of his index and middle finger and swirls it around with his thumb. Black powder. "Y/N, let's be careful."
"What is it?" He stands up, showing you the powder on his fingers.
"Black Lotus." Ah, the Black Lotus. How you despise the Black Lotus. Descendants of the Wild Hunt. They were all nothing but specters who were considered to be an omen of misfortune and death. Bad elves created out of dark magic who brought darkness everywhere, and they were always led by a Knight - their leader. They just wanted to kill, but they rarely ever used their own hands to do so. They loved to use their dark magic, and boy, did they prove to be the most difficult fight for even you, a sorceress who harnesses her powers from Chaos and controls it within.
"But, why?"
"They're either here for something, or they're hiding something. Or, both." Taehyung closes his eyes to try and hone in on his witcher senses, but it can only reach so far, and he's still not unsure what lies behind the golem. "That's why the golem's here. He's the shield."
"Try and see what it is."
"I can't, not from here."
"Well, try harder!" He opens his eyes and furrows his brows down at you.
"You're impossible to please, you know that?" He nods towards the door. "Keep walking. Once we're in there, it'll be easier for me."
"Once we're in there, we'll be busy." You snapped. "Are you ready for that?"
"I'm not a witcher just for shits and giggles, Y/N." He says in a snarky tone. You purse your lips into a fine line because to be fair, that was a stupid question on your part. But, you weren't even sure if you were ready for how abnormally big this golem was going to be, especially if it was truly a golem of Black Lotus creation. "Let me go first."
"Ladies first, anyway." He glares at you before quietly walking into the room that held the golem.  The golem was slumped directly in the middle of the room, sound asleep with its huge body blocking a relic in a box behind it.
"It's a crystallized raven skull." Taehyung whispers very softly and slowly, careful not to wake the golem and surprise it. You nod, trying your best to take cautious steps towards the box from the side of the room - however, that doesn't last when your boot brushes up against a large stone. Taehyung's eyes widen as he sharply turns his head towards you, both frustration and slight fear (for you) seen through his golden eyes. You watch, still as can be, as the golem stands, almost nearing the ceiling of the cave. It immediately hones in on your scent and where you're standing in the room, Taehyung tossing a smoke bomb before running over to block you from any other blind attacks. You run off behind the golem as Taehyung's body flings against the wall due to him trying to shield off an attack from the golem's long, stone arm.
"Shit! Tae!" You yell as you watch him get back up, grabbing his arm.
"Grab it and do your fucking magic ball thing! Now!" He yells in his true witcher fashion. After all these years, and he still doesn't know the proper term for your spells. But, bullshit aside, you watch as he physically musters up all the energy he can to try and distract the golem while you break the spell off of the relic locked away in the box and start focusing on destroying the golem for good. Taehyung moves quick, like a wolf, bouncing from one area to the next, blocking most attacks well. You finally break the spell off of the box and tuck the small, crystallized skull into your back pocket before harnessing the energy from the golem while Taehyung slowed its pace down by using the Yrden sign. Taehyung barely winces as he holds his hand out, but its enough for you to catch on and understand that his energy to keep the sign alive is running out. The energy you've harnessed from the golem comes full circle and is directly aimed back at it, its entire body being destroyed to bits from your single blow.
"Fuck!" You groan as you fall to the floor, completely drained from the act.
"Jesus, Y/N." Taehyung runs over to you, his long, gloved hands on either arm to help you up and support you. "You okay?" You nod.
"Yeah." He quickly brushes the hair out of your face and dusts off the dirt that has fallen onto your cheek. You give him a small smile before he puts his hand down and looks behind you. "Did you get the relic?" You pull it out for examination. Taehyung comes to your side, dusting off the residue and dirt off of the skull before completely taking it in his hands and looking at it closely.
"This is used in conjunction with a spell to summon a raven in battle." You say softly. "It's just like the golem - it'll obey whoever has summoned it and will be of good use during the entire battle. They can definitely use this for black magic too, something elves are definitely capable of."
"Why did they stash it here, though?"
"Well it is an elvish run, but I don't know. This is a super rare skull. I'm guessing that's mostly why."
"But in this particular elvish ruin?"
"Probably didn't think anyone would come and bother it."
"They are aware witchers are back, right?"
"You can go ask them yourself since you witchers love to get into trouble so much." He lightly chuckles.
"Makes the world a better place though, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, yeah." You sigh. "Come on, let's get out of here and go back to my place."
"Back to your place, ey?"
"You helped me with the mission and now you need your reward, right?" You say, sealing off the room with a protection spell.
"What iffffff I want a different reward?" His mouth is slightly open as he pokes his cheek with his tongue, his brow raising up once.
"Don't push it, Taehyung."
"I'm just saying, Y/N." You look up at him, curious about what else he's going to say. "I, uh-"
"Say it." You say softly.
"You drive me crazy, and I hate it."
"I'm not even doing anything to you." He scoffs.
"Trust me, you have been and you have no idea."
"Enlighten me." You say, slowly walking up the steps, but you don't hear Taehyung, nor do you feel him behind you. You quickly turn and see that he's completely gone. "T-Tae? Taehyung?" At first, you think he's playing games because Taehyung had the tendency to be playful, even though 99% of the time he played the serious witcher role. Maybe it was a side only you have seen, and you're flattered, but times like this call for an asswhooping. He should never leave you in the dark like—
"Ouch, fuck!" You barely mumble as you're swallowed through a portal, a dark, pulsating ring of magic circling your neck, making it very difficult for you to breathe. You can barely open your eyes with how much you're struggling, but you are able to catch a glimpse of Taehyung bent on a knee, his hair wet and matted to his forehead while a trail of blood dripped from the corner of his lip. You also see a very tall and dark figure wearing a knight's armor, signaling that it was someone from the Black Lotus. His breath is cold; you see the frost building up on Taehyung's clothing and against the Black Lotus' helmet.
"Put her down." Taehyung says sternly.
"Ah, but she has what I need." The Black Lotus says deeply before turning to you and tightening the grip around your neck by the simple gesture of curling his fingers upward. "Give me. The skull." He puts pauses in between his words.
"No." You manage to say, coughing and choking on your own words. You knew they'd use it to conjure more darkness and release it out onto the towns, because their plans only consisted of killing every living being that didn't follow their ways.
"Give it!" He says, growling. The Black Lotus continues to hold his hand up to keep the ring around your neck, while Taehyung strikes at him only to be beaten down again.
"Y/N." Taehyung says, his eyes cutting into you sharply as he gets onto his knees. You knew what he was trying to say, and what he was planning to do, but you honestly didn't even know if you had the energy to follow along. Magic took up a lot, and with the way this man was choking you near to death, you barely had anything left in you. "Up." Taehyung says to distract the Black Lotus. He looks up, the grip around your neck loosening and giving you momentum to conjure thunder from above and strike him down. You fall to the floor and immediately run to Taehyung, pulling protection bubbles over the both of you. You watch as he runs to the Black Lotus, striking him with both of his swords. His moves smooth like a dance, his jaw clenching every moment he strikes the Black Lotus. You stay in your position, using your hands to channel your energy and continue blasting the Black Lotus with more thunder. You can tell he's getting weaker with the way he stumbles to stand, but he manages to hit Taehyung once more, making him collapse again to the ground. You run over to Tae as he grabs onto his side and tries to get back on his feet.
"You two are so pathetic. You're a sad excuse of a sorceress, just as he's a sad excuse for a witcher." The Black Lotus comes over to you, boots heavily hitting the ground, metal armor clanking against each other. "School of the Wolf, too? My, Geralt of Rivia would have been so displeased to see what the witchers have come to. He—" You shut him up by using your power to carry and lift him from his own two feet, your fingers working to strip him of his armor and stretch his limbs out until he's screaming in agony.
"Taehyung, now. Please!" You order him to get on his two feet and kill him off for good. Although it wasn't necessarily in Taehyung's practice to kill other than monsters, he still had a duty to protect you, or whoever was in danger.
You continue to hold the Black Lotus a few feet above the ground in antagonizing pain while you watch Taehyung place both of his swords at the base of his neck and slice his head off. Taehyung wipes the blood from his swords against his clothing before tucking them back onto his shoulders.
"You good?" He asks, supporting you and pulling you up by the arms again.
"Yeah. I fucking knew it." You look at the body in front of you.
"Smart enough to track where we were at this whole time and separate us."
"Not smart enough in battle though, clearly."
"Mm, to be fair. I think he was. If I was alone, I probably would have been a goner. A witcher alone isn't necessarily a match for the Black Lotus." He looks down at you, eyes softening as he tucks your hair behind your ear and wipes the dirt off of your cheek. "You're just way too strong." You don't say anything besides simply let out a breath. This man was truly the biggest test to you, out of everything you have ever encountered. Taehyung was serious, and intimidating, but you knew him to be the most endearing and charming being. You had a soft spot for him, and sometimes, you wanted nothing more than to just wrap your arms around him and just be. You weren't really sure why you hadn't confessed your feelings, or put your guard down for him. He never gave you a reason to feel like he would betray you or hurt you, but it was most likely due to your insecurities and how you could never match up to how perfect he was.
Although looked down upon as a witcher, you knew he would never do any wrong if given a choice.
"Let's head back before we come across anything else." You say, sealing off the entire ruins before creating a portal for you and Taehyung to jump through and get home.
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The cottage is warm and cozy compared to the time you've spent in the ruins. It smells of the lavender you've burnt off, mixed with citrus from the tea you have brewing in the kitchen. You place a cup in front of Taehyung as he sits and wipes down his swords, placing it below the bench he sits on.
"Wanna stay for awhile? I'll cook us up some good stew." You sip on your tea while you watch him slightly smile and chuckle.
"Sure. Can't say no to that."
"Oh, here." You drop the bag of coins in front of him. "For your help today." He looks at the bag and shakes his head.
"It's alright. I—"
"Taehyung, take it. It's your job. You get paid to slay monsters and all that cute shit, don't you?"
"I suppose." He gets up from his seat. "I'll take it before I leave." He turns to your bathroom. "Mind if I shower? Don't exactly enjoy being covered in all sorts of shit and Black Lotus blood."
"Go for it."
"Thanks." He says, making his way to your bathroom. You watch as he leaves the door slightly ajar while sipping the remainder of your tea. You can't seem to peel your eyes off of the bathroom slit, continuing to watch as Taehyung strips off his upper body clothing. You catch a glimpse of him just above the torso, stepping into your bathtub and letting the shower head above wash him down.
You really can't help yourself. Not after today.
You slowly get rid of your garments, tossing them aside onto the bench near the door, gently pushing the door open to the bathroom in your undergarments.
"What do you think you're doing, Y/N?" He says without drawing the curtains, definitely picking up on your scent and sound through his witcher senses.
"Joining you for a bath, what does it look like?" You say, letting down your bra and panties as you pull the curtain back and step inside with him. He simply looks down at you, his black hair now wet and slicked back. His eyes are glowing under the dim light as he turns to fully give you his attention. His eyes roam from the bottom portion of your body before they come back up and lock onto your eyes. Your fingers trace down the huge scar across his chest, along with the little ones trailing down to his abdomen.
A witcher's body. The damage it takes.
Your hand lands on his cheek, thumb gently caressing it before slowly leaning in to press your lips against his. He takes you in, his hands landing on your arms to pull you closer. You deepen the kiss, your tongue gliding against his bottom lip, causing him to let out a small moan into the kiss. You feel his hardened member brush against your pussy, sending sparks throughout your body.
"Hm, you truly don't understand what you do to me." He says softly as you pull away, water dripping from his long eyelashes.
"Care to tell me? Since last time we were so rudely interrupted."
"I think I'll show you instead." You bite onto your bottom lip watching him hold you close as you begin to wash your hair. His hands land on the small of your back, planting kisses along your collarbone and neck, his teeth nipping at your skin. He comes back up to meet your lips, his hands in your hair as you wash the soap off. Your tongues are messily fighting for dominance now, the sounds of wet kisses filling the shower. He pulls away and begins to lower himself down to a crouch. He tugs your leg over his shoulder, his hands gripping your thighs to support himself while he begins to plant kisses on your clit and your folds. His tongue swipes a stripe up before he begins to toy around and run it along your clit in circular motions.
"Taaaaae." You moan as you place your hand against the wall, feeling your knees getting weaker by the minute.
"Prettiest fucking sight." He says before latching onto your clit once more, sucking as he allows his two digits to stretch you out. "Need you to be ready for me, baby."
"Fuck!" You say, almost groaning at how good he feels simply finger fucking you. "God, you're gonna make me cum so quick."
"Mhm." He bites onto his lip as he shoves another finger in, picking up his pace. His veins are popping out of his forearms and neck the more he tries to pleasure you. "Cum for me, sweetheart." He sucks harder onto your clit, causing you to hurdle over the edge. He doesn't part his lips right away, sucking gently and removing his fingers from inside of you to help you ride out the rest of your high. He stands back up, his cock brushing against your sensitive pussy.
You want more of him, and he wants you just as bad.
You take his cock in your hand, pumping him up and down as he backs you against the wall. He tilts his head back in pleasure, groaning, almost whining at your touch.
"Need to feel you." He says, removing your hand and swooping you into his arms to have your legs wrapped around his waist. The cold pressure from the stone wall hits your skin sharply, causing you to hiss as he positions himself to line up with your entrance. He presses his lips against yours, muffling your moans as you feel his tip slowly penetrate your entrance before the rest of him fills you up - completely, warmly, fully. You pull back, your forehead touching his as you lock eyes and grip his hair. "Fuck, you feel so fucking good. Taking me in so perfectly every time." He says lowly, his lips barely grazing yours.
"Fucking handle me, Tae. Please." His hands are gripping your ass tightly as he works his hips and rolls into your pussy, your clit rubbing against his abdomen every single time. Your hips begin to work in tandem with his, following his motion and providing another layer of pleasure for the both of you.
"Fuck, Y/N." He groans. "I'm taking you to the bed." He says, aggressively drawing the curtains and stepping out.
"Tae, the water!" You squeal as he keeps himself inside of you and rushes over to your bed.
"Fuck the water!" He says causing you to giggle as he positions you on the bed, and instantly begins to fuck you more aggressively. You moan loudly, the pleasure almost becoming overwhelming that you pinch your nipples as an outlet while he hammers into you. His nails are digging deep into your hips while he lowers his mouth back down onto your neck.
"I'm gonna cum!" You yell, arching your back slightly and palming your breasts.
"No the hell you're not." He says, removing himself from inside of you and smirking. You whine, almost cry at the separation, wanting to feel him inside of you so badly that you can't even bear to feel empty right now.
"Taehyung." You whine.
"Beg for it, baby. Tell me what you want." He strokes himself, spreading your wetness all throughout his cock.
"I want you to make me cum." He nods, his tongue poking his cheek.
"How do you want it?"
"Any way! Just fuck me!" You yell, annoyed that he's teasing you in such a manner. He begins to chuckle a bit before he aggressively gets you to get on your fours.
"Turn around." He says, tugging on your hair as he begins to line himself to enter again. He groans as he feels your walls devour him, the warmth and wetness sending him into a high. The lewd, wet noises of skin against skin begins to fill the room as he rams into your pussy, hair pulled tightly so that he can see the look on your face. "My pretty baby." He says, quickening his pace, your mouth unable to release any noise due to how overwhelming the pleasure is.
"I'm gonna cum, Tae!" You yell, followed by small whimpers. It isn't long before you feel your walls clench around him, your knees buckling as the orgasm takes over completely. You fall onto the bed, Taehyung continuing to fuck into you as your face is in the mattress. He gives your ass one good smack before he rams into you one more time and has you turn over. He doesn't wait for you to settle, and bottoms out with your legs thrown over his shoulders, wanting to fuck you and have you feel him deep in your gut.
"Ohhhhhhshit." He says as he slowly thrusts in and out, circling your clit with his thumb. "You feel so good around me. Gonna make me cum, sweetheart." It's so overwhelming to you that it gets painful for a second before your body overrides the feeling and turns the pain into more pleasure.
"Yes, yes, yes!" You plead, tears streaming down your cheeks. "Just like that!" You cry as he groans, his high coming to a close. "Cum inside me baby, please. W-wanna feel you." You breathily say.
"Fuck!" He groans as his thrusts begin to get sloppy, his thumb continuing to work on your nub. Sooner or later, you feel him release inside of you, filling you up in every way possible while he grips onto your knees tightly. You tremble for the third time in his grip, your body weak from how hard you came this last time. He slowly falls ontop of you, your hands tangled in his wavy hair while his member softens within you.
"So, is that how you really feel?" You joke, causing him to chuckle in the position he's in.
"You're a pain in the ass." He removes himself from inside of you and grabs a tissue to clean you up.
"Me? I gotta clean up the mess you just made and put on some new sheets." He shows off his boxy smile as he finished wiping you off and lays next to you.
"I'd say it's worth it." You smile at him as he holds you close.
"I hate you, you know that?" You respond softly, looking into his eyes.
"Well, I love you, you know that? And I fucking hate it."
"Cause you won't let me have you." You bite onto your bottom lip and cup his cheek as you turn to face him. His soft hand is planted on your hip, finger drawing circles onto your skin.
"I want you to have me."
"Yeah? No bullshit?" You laugh.
"No bullshit."
"Oh for the love of God, finally." He lets out a heavy sigh. "Only took years for you to fucking say that."
"Shut up before I change my mind, witcher." You sit up but he pulls you back down and places a kiss on your jaw.
"Tell me you love me." He wiggles his eyebrows. "Just let me hear it once, especially after today." You sigh.
"I love you." You roll your eyes, causing him to laugh. "Now, can I go make some food and clean up?"
"Sure thing, pretty lady." He says, giving your ass a good smack as you get up to leave him.
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➺ portals that are currently open: 
✘ the cat
༄ the manticore
✘ the griffin
༄ the viper
✘ the crane
✘ the bear
⟳ back to novigrad?
404 notes · View notes
bangtanfancamp · 3 months ago
the Devil Wears Gucci ⬗ Part 5
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As the dedicated personal assistant of the genius mind behind House of RM, the empire that rules the fashion industry, your world is turned upside down the day Kim Namjoon himself personally asks you to train his newest hire— the eternally insufferable Kim Taehyung.
• masterlist
•series masterlist
•pairing: Kim Taehyung x reader (feat. Namjoon)
•word count: 4.5k
•rating: honestly, mature seems like a bit too much, and pg-13 feels like an early 2000s rom-com, no.... neither? Both? Idk. Use your discretion. 🤷🏽‍♀️
•genre: enemies to lovers, fashion industry au, devil wears Prada au, f*ckboi au, fluff, romance, slight angst, slow burn, fast banter
•warnings: high banter, a few cuss words, the fearsome aura of angry Namjoon, Taehyung being a butt
•author’s note: Hi guys! I know it’s been a hot minute since I updated this baby (and by hot minute I mean May of 2019. 😬 it’s not usually this bad for other stories though.) So sorry! Hi to old readers, and welcome to new ones! But either way, this chapter is fast and fun and was a treat to write. Hope you enjoy!
(Pic cred to @vanteholic)
In the next few days following the incident at Namjoon’s, Taehyung is distant towards you at best. His glacial irises skim right past you in his new contacts every time he has to speak with you. His normally heavy lidded gaze that lingers all too long is replaced by cursory glances so icy they make your skin prickle.
His voice is a calm shade of indifference as he brusquely accepts his assignments and swiftly attends to them. His body language is aloof- elegant jawline gritted and lifted airily away from you, not deigning to come down from the clouds to speak to you, his broad shoulders forever angled away from you. It frustrates you completely in more ways than you care to mention, not the least of which being that you have never been ignored so…. beautifully… before.
Even just thinking such a thing makes you roll your eyes at yourself. You can’t believe you’ve even allowed Fuccboi extraordinaire Kim Taehyung to linger in your thoughts for more than two seconds, but somehow, the more he’s ignored you, the deeper that weasel has gotten under your skin.
For one thing, you resent the power his newfound silence toward you has brokered him. Because that’s the thing, he’s still his outrageously personable self with everyone else in the office. Everyone but you. Which puts you in the bizarre position of having to seek him out if you need something instead of your usual dynamic of having to constantly swat his presence away, and you hate it.
You aren’t sure what childhood trauma this dynamic is dragging up, but the button it pushes in you is maddening. You hate that his pouting somehow gives him the upper hand in your unspoken feud. You hate that he behaved so badly on that outing that you nearly lost your career, and yet somehow you are the one feeling like you need to apologize. But most of all, you hate that he’d been right in that hallway.
He’d been able to see what you hadn’t- your work relationship with Namjoon really is terribly unhealthy. It had been staring you in the face for so long- long before Taehyung ever came to work at House of Rm- but it had taken Taehyung and all his audacity to finally make you look it in the face.
You had a crush on your boss, which was bad enough to begin with, but beyond that, your natural lean to accommodate had been taken advantage of. You had, in fact, been so trained to walk on eggshells that you resented Taehyung for shattering one instead of directing your fury toward the boss who’d lined the hallway with breakable things in the first place.
Taehyung had metaphorically grabbed you by the shoulders and shaken you that day, and your world hasn’t felt quite right since. Self awareness never is an easy thing, but something about a boy you’d thought to be hopelessly immature calling you out on your own blind spots has been tremendously unsettling. The clarity you had in the aftermath of that has been hard to swallow ever since.
So much so, that this whole bizarre dance between you and Taehyung has now been going on every day for the last two weeks. Neither of you seemed to know how to call a ceasefire, so instead you both drowned each other in hostility and avoidance. Silent exchanges and chilly body language with no end in sight.
That is, until today.
It’s bright and early Wednesday morning, and before you’ve even stepped foot out of bed, there’s a message lighting up your phone. Rolling over and groaning, your groggy gaze lands on a clipped, succinct message demanding your first stop of the day be Namjoon’s office once you clock in for the day.
Blearily, you consider hiding back under your duvet instead, wondering briefly if you’d get any sort of severance pay if you quit by simply not showing up. Probably not, but at least no one would yell at you that way. Michelle from HR was always pleasant . Maybe she’d be helpful enough to fetch the things from your desk whenever they officially let you go.
Sitting up, you sigh, knowing good and well you’d never have the gumption to do something like that. Not to mention the list of other reasons why that would be a terrible idea even if you did, not the least of which being there is no way in hell you could ever afford this apartment if you quit.
But as you walk to the window, peeking out at the first few rays of daylight, you realize you’re never here often enough to enjoy this place anyway. Taehyung had called you out on that the first day he’d met you, an annoying fact that continues to itch at the back of your brain no matter how much you hate it. Defeatedly, you pull the curtains back into place, knowing that even though it’s barely 6am, there’s no point in leaving them open. You won’t be back in this spot again til well after dark.
Rubbing your eyes with the heels of your hand, you take one last moment to yourself before going to get yourself ready for your day.
You wonder what nonsense will come your way today.
As you round the corner to Namjoon’s office, you’re shocked to almost brush hands with Taehyung when you both reach for the doorknob at the same time.
“What are you doing here?”
The question leaves your mouth with more bite than you intend, but you’re honestly too tired for this.
“My job. I do work here, y/n.”
His eye roll is barely contained as his broad shoulder pushes past you, but not before he pauses. For the first time, you notice the recycled cardboard tray full of coffee cups in his other hand.
Coffee pickup was one of the first jobs you’d offloaded onto him the second he’d proven himself capable in his first month. You’d always hated it anyway, and you were glad to get rid of it. Doing so had not only given you an extra 15 minutes of sleep every day, but relief from the anxiety of having to take responsibility for any barista mix ups. You got sleep, freedom, and free delivery? A win in every direction.
But since that awful day with the closet debacle, despite keeping up his responsibility, Taehyung hadn’t brought you a single beverage. He’d still pick up Namjoon’s, get one for himself and often one for Mina….,but not one for you. At first, you’d been furious at his pettiness, but now you’d accepted your fate of either suffering though breakroom coffee or having to make your own at home, both of which defeated the fifteen minutes of sleep you’d been trying to eek back so you’d been suffering without it for the past two weeks.
The warm aromatics of the drinks in his hands swirl under your nose, and just for a second, your eyes close as you imagine stealing one from his hand and dashing from the building. You’ve really got to get these runaway fantasies under control.
When your eyes open again, Taehyung has the most curious look in his eye. He sighs like he’s been debating something, and is unhappy with himself with the resolution he’s come to.
His large hand moves to gently twist a drink free and shoves it in your direction. As your mouth falls open, he’s quick to cut you off.
“You’ve looked like crap without your caffeine lately. I don’t need you nodding off at the desk again today. Your snoring really throws off the mood.”
Affronted, you’re tempted to pour the entire drink down the front of his outfit and hope it tarnishes the buckle on his knock-off gucci belt, but you press a manicured nail into his chest instead.
“I have never fallen asleep in the office, and I do not snore.”
“Ah ah, hands to yourself, ma’am. This is a place of work. Try to contain yourself.” He tuts as he brushes your hand away.
Squinting at him in derision, you’re about to bite out a comeback when the door suddenly swings itself open.
“Good morning, both of you,” Namjoon announces.
“Oh- good morning, sir.”
“... is not a name you, of all people, are allowed to call me.”  Namjoon’s voice is all venom despite the placid mask he keeps over his eyes as he calmly retrieves the cup marked with his name from the tray in Taehyung’s hands. “Come inside, both of you. There are matters to attend to.”
“Yes, sir. Coming sir.” You follow sheepishly, adjusting your oversized blazer dress as you come to sit in the chairs across from his desk.
“Yes sir, coming sir,” Taehyung mocks under his breath for only you to hear as he sits beside you.
“I will kill you,” you mouth to him silently once Namjoon turns away.
“Promise?” He mouths back with a mocking grin.
Wrapping your knuckles around the arm of the chair to keep from reaching over and strangling him, you try your best to refocus your attention toward Namjoon.
“What can we do for you this morning, sir?” You ask.
You hear Taehyung swallow a muffled gagging sound beside you, but you keep your eyes focused ahead and ignore him. The forced politeness tastes acidic in your mouth these days, but as it stands, Namjoon is still your boss. and you’ve still got a job to do, so the quicker you can get out of this office, the better.
“As you know, award season will soon be in full swing. Our show at fashion week this year was met with rave reviews, and we’ve had quite a few starlets walking the red carpet in original House of RM gowns this season. Rachel McAdams in particular caused quite the stir in that little red, sheer lace number.”
When Namjoon looks your way with a secret nod and fingers steepled under his chin, you can’t help the way you beam back at him. You spent months going back and forth with her stylist to plan that, and your pride at it being received so well was positively glowing out from breath your skin.
“Since the brand has been garnering so much positive attention as of late, we have been asked to host Vogue’s fall party celebrating iconic women in cinema, and as the woman who helped us attract so much of this attention, I’d like for you to take point coordinating it.”
You feel your brows shoot up beyond your fringe of their own accord as his words sink in.
“Me? Sir, you want me to plan the event?”
“Unless you think you’re not up for the task,” Namjoon arches a brow pointedly.
“Oh, sir of course not- I mean, of course, I’m not saying that! I’m up for the task. I am. Anything you need, I’m on it.” You nod out, with altogether too much enthusiasm.
“Good,” he clips, turning his gaze to Taehyung. “As for you, as her assistant, I need you to make sure none of her regular assignments slip through the cracks while she focuses on this. I need you to be at her beck and call for anything she needs during this process so the event on the 14th goes off without a hitch.”
“- the fourteenth?” Something that feels like cement hardens in your gut when you hear the date.” Wait— Do you mean the fourteenth of next month?”
“No, I do not. I mean the fourteenth of this month.” Namjoon states plainly.
“Wait, but sir, that’s only a week and a half away.”
You feel your eyes round with panic.
“Which is precisely why I need you to get started. I’ve already taken up too much of your morning.”
“Not at all, sir. Thank you for the opportunity.”
“Yes, yes. I’ll have Serena from Vogue email you all the details we’ve already discussed, and you can take the rest from there.”
Swallowing, the full weight of the task you’ve just been given begins to crush it’s way into you. Your “yes, sir” is small, with none of its usual punch. Perhaps you shouldn’t expect more of yourself when you can barely get a grasp on the oxygen necessary to stay conscious right now.
Clearing his throat beside you, Taehyung seems to catch on to your lightheaded state and speaks up for you before your wooziness can make you tip over in distress.
“On it, boss.” He winks, clicking his teeth cheekily,and for once, you’re grateful for the distraction he creates. “It’s in good hands.”
“It better be,” His smile is tight and insincere. A terribly unnatural thing on his sharp features. “The brand's reputation is riding on this.” Namjoon makes direct eye contact with you as he says this, and you wish the shiver running down your spine was because you thought his eyes were striking and not because you’re scared to death.
“That’s a bit ominous for a sunny morning, isn’t it? Don’t think it’s quite the right mood in this room to be making such grandiose statements before noon.” There’s an irritation creeping its way into Taehyung’s jaw the longer he watches Namjoon stare you down. You’d chastise him for it if you didn’t feel like you were on the verge of passing out.
“You’re still new to this world so I’ll give your naiveté a pass, but there was nothing grandiose about that statement,” Namjoon corrects. “In fact, it may not have had enough weight. If this is not the event of the season, then it may as well not happen at all.”
You feel your blood run a bit cold at the chill in Namjoon’s voice. If you’d thought Taehyung had been icy the past two weeks, he had nothing on Namjoon. The man was practically SubZero when he wanted to be. God, you wanted this over with.
“Absolutely. We’ll make sure it’s an event to remember,” you promise, rising to stand. You have got to get out of this office before you start shedding your skin out of anxiety.
Taehyung takes your cue, rising as well.
“It had better be,” Namjoon’s haughty eyes rake over both of you one last time before his gaze falls back to his laptop.
The silence in the room is your cue to leave, and you take it in a heartbeat.
You’re not sure how you’ve gotten here, but suddenly, you find yourself sitting at your own desk, gaze pointed glazedly out the window. You must have blacked out for a second there and walked here on autopilot after the shock of this morning. Taehyung sits in silence across from you, digging something out of his laptop bag, as you try to wrap your head around what’s been asked of you.
House of Rm has been asked to co-host one of the biggest Gala’s of the season, and you’ve been asked to run it. To coordinate every last detail. To get all the glory if it succeeds and all the derision if it fails.
You think you’re going to have an aneurysm.
You need a drink. Grasping for the cup on your desk, you’re surprised when the taste on your lips isn’t coffee at all, but a decadently spiced tea instead. It’s decidedly autumnal, and even though it’s delicious, the surprise of it throws you for a loop. Taken aback, you look first at the cup, then up at Taehyung and back at the cup.
“ Taehyung, what drink is this?” You mutter in confusion.
“It’s a chai tea latte.” He responds without looking up.
“A what?”
“A chai tea latte.”
“The cafe put out their fall drinks today. Besides, I haven’t seen you drink coffee in a while. No sense turning you into a jittery mess with straight espresso. Figured I’d ease you back in.” He shrugged.
“I haven’t had coffee because my assistant stopped bringing it to me.” You frown.
“Be that as it may, my point stands, and You can’t tell me that doesn’t taste like fall in a cup.”
Taking another sip, you find he’s entirely right. The beautiful blend of spices reminds you of baking as a child, the rich swirl of cinnamon and clove settling in your bones like a welcome home.
“And what makes you think I’d like that?” You quip, making yourself wince. Why couldn’t you just tell him thank you?
Taehyung gives you a pointed look. There’s a weight in his gaze you don’t quite understand and don’t have time to decipher before he’s turning away and sighing.
“Because the whole world knows you love fall,” he shakes his head with his eyes on his work. “If you don’t like it, we can always trade.”
“Why? What did you get?”
“Pumpkin Spice Latte,” he states plainly as you scrunch your nose.
“No thanks, I’ll stick with this one.”
For the first time in what feels like forever, you hear a little huff of air leave his nose that sounds almost like a laugh. “What’s the problem?”
“There’s no problem. I just like my chai tea.”
“No, that’s not it.”
“Yes, it is, I’m very content with my drink.” You swallow a sip for emphasis.
“I know that. It’s a very you drink. I wanna know why you looked like you’d rather jump off a building than take a sip of my PSL.”
“Was it really necessary to refer to it by its acronym out loud?”
“It’s more efficient. Don’t try to distract me,” he wags one of his long, jeweled fingers in your direction. “Answer the question.”
Grimacing, you take another extended chug of your latte to stall. “Fine. I hate pumpkin, okay?”
Taehyung looks positively aghast.
“Are you insane? Do you hate kittens and babies too?”
“That is entirely out of line.”
“I’m not so sure it is. Do you also have a deep seated hatred for angels and miracles too?” He leans forward, face cradled in his chin as he studies you in disbelief.
“Look, I just don’t have a thing for pumpkin, all right? Which was a perfectly acceptable personality trait-“
“—Trait,” you correct, “until Starbucks’ marketing team went ape with that pumpkin spice latte guerrila marketing and now it’s a societal expectation that people have to like it or else-“
“— or else people will know your true identity as a witch who should be burned at the stake for her crimes against humanity,” he deadpans.
This. This is why you couldn’t say thank you.
“You know what? Not liking certain foods is perfectly normal. I don’t need to justify myself to you,” you huff, gathering up the haphazard stack of papers on your desk into a bundle. You don’t need this in your life. You can go work in the break room if necessary if that’s what it takes to avoid this scrutiny.
“I guess, but that doesn’t explain how the human embodiment of autumn hates her own season’s golden child fruit.”
“Gourd,” you correct. “ A pumpkin is a gourd, not a fruit.”
“Whatever,” he dismisses. “Actually, no. Don’t. That proves my point. Why do you know so much about it if you hate it?” Taehyung sing-songs with his arms crossed.
“Because I made it past eighth grade?” You shrug with an admittedly judgmental frown on your face.
“Touché. I didn’t make it past fourth clearly, so this is news to me.” He rolls his eyes at you, and if you weren’t so annoyed, some part of you would be relieved that he was at least talking to you again… if you weren’t so annoyed.
“Look, I love spice. I like cinnamon just fine. I like sweaters and cool crisp weather and rain and multicolor leaves crunching under my boots, but pumpkin and I just... never hit it off okay? It's just a preference thing, really,” you’re trying your best to sound nonchalant, despite being boggled that the conversation has lasted this long and desperately wanting to end it. You have other awful, career deciding stress to attend to. You don’t have time for his off-brand Sherlock theatrics.
“Bull crap. There’s a story here, and I don’t get why you won’t just share it.” Taehyung pouts over his tightly crossed arms. If he sticks those lips of his out any further, his face will probably start to cramp.
“Because. There’s nothing to tell,” you hiss, rising over the computer monitor to make sure he hears you loud and clear.
Mina chooses that exact moment to come sashaying by, and Taehyung immediately pounces on the opportunity to give his nonsense an audience.
“Mina, baby, my love- come over here!” He bellows, slipping his lanky fingers under the edge of her sweater’s cuff to pull her over. She tips over giggling until her bum is seated square on the edge of Taehyung’s desk, enthralled by the pet names he’s just graced her with, no doubt.
“Taehyungie, shush. People will hear,” she blushes but says entirely too loud, preening under his praise and fishing for more.
“Let them, my love.” He crinkles his nose up at her, snapping his teeth at the air, and you’re pretty sure Mina has transformed into an entirely different state of matter- some gloopy puddle or a puff of evaporated glitter- you’re not sure which, but either way, she’s simping all over your workspace and you’d much rather get on with your day.
“I hate to interrupt all this fun, but I do actually have things of my own to attend to, so if you don’t mind, I’ll be excusing my-“
“Sugarplum, get this: y/n doesn’t believe in pumpkins.” Taehyung whisper-announces like the petty town gossip he is as Mina gasps.
“Like, she doesn’t believe they exist?” She asks, peeking over her shoulder to survey you like the circus oddity you are.
“For Christ’s sake. I didn’t-“
“No, like as a religious belief. She thinks Pumpkin Spice Latte’s are Satan and Lillith’s first born child,” Taehyung explains.
“Y/n!” Mina chides, voice full of shame and shock, as her small palm rushes to brace against her ample bosom.
Dropping your stack of files on the desk, you drag your hands over your eyes.
“You know, Taehyung, one of these days, I’m going to walk straight up to your desk with a number two pencil and just stab you right between the eyes,” you grit.
“Oof,” he winces. “What an imaginative way to die. Do you think about this often?”
“Only every day.” You smile.
“In such stunning detail too? I’m sure Michelle in HR would love to know that. Might have to drop her a post it note.” He eyes you with concern, and you feel your blood pressure flair.
“You do that,” you challenge, teeth locked in the unfriendliest smile your face can create, as you try to remember what you learned about regulating your breathing from that one semester you got into meditation, but find yourself coming up short. Maybe this is what they meant about it being easier to draw on if you made it a habit.
“Why do you hate the best part about fall though, y/n?” Mina asks like she really wants to know, but also like she’s a little bit afraid of you.
“There’s no additional reason! Why does no one believe me?” You’re on the verge of screaming now. What was that sound? Did a blood vessel just pop?
“Because people don’t have hysterical breakdowns over having their buttons pushed when there’s ‘nothing there’” Taehyung pantomimes two absurdly large quotation marks as you squint so forcefully at him that you can feel a tension headache forming.
“Fine!” You stand, slamming your palms on your desk. “You wanna know the real reason why??”
“Yes,” Taehyung says airily. “That’s what I’ve been asking for the last fifteen minutes, isn’t it?” His brows lift over his angled face as if to say ‘duh’ as he picks at lint on his trousers.
“You insufferable little— you wanna know the truth so damn bad? Fine! Here it is: I really genuinely didn't like the taste of pumpkin as a kid. Truly. And everyone knew it. So to have a little fun with me, my sixth grade crush Joey Mancuso got my attention by asking me on a date but when I looked his way, he yelled psych! And pumpkin pied me in the face! In front of the whole grade at lunch. I had pumpkin pie filling in my ears for three days! It was a nightmare! So there? You happy? There’s your why okay???”
You’ve been gesturing wildly out of frustration and now that you’re done, you’re panting, chest heaving as you loom above, Mina and Taehyung both of whom look both concerned and afraid respectively. Heads around the office have turned to look your way at the commotion, all of them disappearing like gophers back into their holes the instant you make eye contact with them.
“Oh my god, that’s awful,” Mina cringes, beautiful face scrunched in horror, but instead of comforting you, you catch the way she inches her hips away from you, like emotional instability might be contagious if she sits too close to it.
“What a dick,” Taehyung sneers,” But still, why blame the noble pumpkin for his foolish transgression? It’s not the pumpkin’s fault it was wielded by that little asshat.”
Suddenly, you get it. You understand why cartoon character’s vision turns a sloppy shade of red when they're angry, because as you look at Taehyung's clueless face, all you see is scarlet and the urgent need to asphyxiate him.
“Why you little— are you serious right now?!”
“As a heart attack,” he tips his head confidently.
“That’s what you got from that story???” You shriek.
This absolute son of a — You’re sure there’s something about how to handle this in one of those new hire pamphlets on “de escalating tension in the workplace” but at the moment, none of it seems relevant. All you really want to do right now is smash his pretty little head into the desk so he’ll be quiet, but you know that definitely isn’t on the list of conflict resolution tips, so you flex your knuckles instead and just try to imagine it.
“You know what? If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the fourth floor commons working on the itinerary for Vogue’s fall gala and ignoring you until you dematerialize into dust,” you snarl at Taehyung as you snatch up your laptop and huff away.
“Hey! You forgot your chai tea latte!” Taehyung calls out.
It takes everything in you not to cap your rampage off by flipping him off and adding an extra sprinkled dash of a shouted “fuck you” at him as you stomp away. You breath harsh through your nose as you exhale, proud of yourself for having that modicum of professionalism, at least.
You were wrong earlier , you think. It’s better when he doesn’t talk.
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sybilwriting · 2 months ago
filtering light 「 ch. 1 」
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pairing: park jimin x reader x jeon jungkook
includes: bunny!reader, human!park jimin, human!jeon jungkook, golden retriever!jung hoseok, human!min yoongi, tiger!kim taehyung, human!kim namjoon, human!kim seokjin.
word count: 6k
warnings: none
summary: the reader is a bunny hybrid with a past that has left her traumatized and struggling to heal. some things can be helped with therapy, but some things can only be fixed through realizing you're not all of the things that hurt you—you are, in fact, just loved.
[ one ] [ two ] [ three ] [ four ] [ five ] [ six ] [ seven ]
The garden of The Violet was lush and sprawling, filling everything the eye could see with green leaves, bright flowers, and twinkling butterflies. The day was perfect; spring had just begun and the days were perfectly cool, the sun warming whatever parts of people it could touch. The humans moving around were all smiling, making polite conversation, and snacking on whatever food had been put out by the catering company. The banner that hung over the entrance to the garden reminded everyone that they were there for a cause: The Violet Hybrid Awareness Fund. As if the attendees could forget anyway.
The Violet had set up the event to raise awareness for hybrid care and hybrid lives—something the foundation had become directly involved in when they opened a shelter of their own almost a decade prior. Hybrid rights was a young movement but there were more and more people dedicating themselves to being a voice for the hybrids who were constantly being silenced. The Violet had invited some of the community’s most powerful and influential people to spend the day learning more about hybrid life and how they can help hybrids even if they didn’t want to adopt one.
There had been classes on almost every kind of hybrid and what they were like. There were classes on hybrid treatment (and cases of mistreatment). There were classes detailing The Violet’s plan to improve as many hybrid lives as possible. Currently, hybrids still had to be adopted to be free, and when they were in public they were required by law to wear their collars. The Violet, however, wanted hybrids to be enabled to gain their independence and autonomy without fear of humans interfering or hurting them.
While it was now generally frowned upon to have hybrids as servants, there were plenty of people in the world who thought of hybrids as property they paid for and could do what they wanted with. There were a few programs forming that worked to create policies that protected hybrids and made it possible to prosecute people who treated their hybrids inhumanely, but there was still a lot of work to be done. The Violet was asking communities to partner with them in the fight.
The morning had been filled with information and passionate words from founders of The Violet as well as from employees who had one story or another of how they were faced with the injustice of hybrid treatment and how they chose to stand and fight for those who were not allowed to fight for themselves. It was all very emotional and moving, if Park Jimin did say so himself.
Jimin had been invited alongside his partner, Jeon Jungkook, and a few of their friends. They felt strongly about the treatment of hybrids—anyone with eyes to see the abuse they suffered would be—but truly the two had no idea there was so much they didn’t know about hybrids in general. Their friend Namjoon was more knowledgeable on the subject, and he had been excited about the event for weeks. Namjoon was heavily involved in The Violet’s efforts to raise the quality of life for hybrids, even volunteering his time on top of donating hundreds of thousands of dollars to the foundation every year. How he found time on top of being the CEO of his own clean energy company was anyone’s guess. But if he struggled with balance it didn’t show as he approached the table his people sat at. He was grinning with excitement.
“Are you excited to meet the hybrids?” He asked, sitting down and stealing a cheese cracker off of Jungkook’s plate.
“Hybrids?” Jimin asked, looking up from the pamphlet he’d been reading. It was about hybrid nesting and he found it interesting enough that he’d been reading in silence, paying little attention to his surroundings until Namjoon spoke up.
“Yeah, the lady said it earlier. Some hybrids from the shelter are going to be here so we can meet them.” Jungkook remembered.
“Oh,” was all Jimin said.
He felt a little overwhelmed with information about the reality hybrids faced. In the seminar he sat in, they had talked about cases in which hybrids were mistreated and defended themselves but were impounded as a result. Past shelters were nothing like what The Violet had going on. There were pictures of small cages, unsanitary living conditions, and overcrowding. Staff members were just as likely to abuse the hybrids they were responsible for as the monsters the hybrids had just escaped.
“One of my trainers has a hybrid,” Jungkook said around a bite of melon. “She’s a cat hybrid. Kind of feisty.”
“Our CFO has a cat hybrid.” Namjoon nodded. “They usually have their person and everyone else can fuck off.” He chuckled.
“What kind of hybrid is the best to work with?” Jungkook asked Namjoon, wide eyes inquiring up at him.
“I get along well with dog hybrids. They’re the most approachable.”
“You mean you scare the other ones off.”  Jimin laughed. Namjoon blushed and shifted in his seat like he was being put out by the teasing.
“Ah—okay, okay.” He rolled his eyes. Everyone knew Namjoon was a bit clumsy. Dog hybrids found it funny if anything. He did in fact alarm a lot of the prey hybrids, who were already weary of him because of his size. “Anyway, most of the hybrids visiting will be low key. Some dogs, some cats, maybe a hamster. The more agreeable hybrids.”
“Agreeable?” Jungkook questioned.
“Yeah,  the ones who are okay with people for the most part. Some of the more exotic hybrids take a while to warm up to humans and wouldn’t benefit from something like this.” He sipped his drink. “But The Violet wanted to bring some hybrids who wouldn’t mind people but could also benefit from more exposure to people.”
The three men hummed in thought.
“Will you know any of them?” Jimin asked.
“No, probably not. Most of my work is done in the offices.”
And they fell into conversation about Namjoon’s work with The Violet, his business trying to make clean energy for the city, and his partner Jin. Jin was out of town on his own business, and wasn’t able to make it. None of the men missed the way Namjoon’s eyes softened when he spoke about missing his husband. It made the guys promise to try and distract him until Jin got back, making an offer to look around at the new art exhibit that had opened downtown. Namjoon was taking them up on that when the hybrids arrived.
There was no announcement at first, so as not to make the hybrids uncomfortable. But slowly, they started trickling in from inside the building. The first to be noticed was a golden retriever that spoke loudly and with an excited lilt in his tone. There was a scottish fold hybrid that sat alone until a few women approached her to make conversation. There weren’t more than twenty-five hybrids but the guests could see where they were based on the pockets of people that surrounded them.
Most thrived on the attention, their tails shaking back and forth behind them as they answered people’s questions. Others were visibly nervous and it seemed as though the staff members would notice and subtly guide attendees elsewhere so the hybrid would not be overwhelmed. It was truly interesting to witness. With images of hybrids being mistreated still fresh in their minds, everyone was being mindful and kind.
After about fifteen minutes, the announcement was finally made that The Violet’s hybrids had arrived and were making themselves comfortable. There were some activities for everyone to do to just relax and have fun. A corner for painting with easels and canvases was set up off to the side, away from where a game of soccer had started out between some dog hybrids and a few athletes who had come to support The Violet. Some younger hybrids were drawing with chalk along the walkways of the garden. Some hybrids kept to themselves and others joined in groups with humans, making small talk and just enjoying the opportunity to meet people who weren’t staff members. Everyone seemed occupied, doing their own thing, and Jungkook had decided he wanted to try his hand at painting.
There were a couple mouse hybrids that had started up in the paint area, and he greeted them as he looked around the supplies for what he might want. Jungkook had seen hybrids in passing, but had never really interacted with them. None of his friends owned any, and the ones he had met on the street were often not allowed to interact with strangers. That was why an event like this was important, he thought, to teach hybrids they shouldn’t have to be afraid of strangers. Though, a small part of his mind whispered that more often than not hybrids had a reason to fear humans. Regardless, humans should learn to be more comfortable with hybrids as well.
He grabbed a few sheets of watercolor paper, some brushes, a pen, some paint, and headed back to the table where his friends were. On his way he also snagged a plate of pastries, grinning to himself at the sight of the sweets. He placed his things down on the table and realized Jimin was talking with a hybrid. It was the golden retriever he had seen come out first.
When the hybrid got to the table where Jimin and Namjoon were chatting, he told them his name was Hoseok. Hoseok was very obviously friendly and extroverted. He had made his rounds talking to anyone and everyone. His conversation with Jimin was about what kind of work Jimin did. Jimin, it turned out, worked in security.
“Yeah? Like Park Systems level security?” Hoseok joked. Park Systems was a well known security company based in the city. The company was trusted with most of the big business security teams as well as basic home security systems. Hoseok had made the joke because the idea of the CEO of Park Systems being at The Violet talking to a golden retriever hybrid seemed laughable. When Jimin extended his hand and introduced himself as Park Jimin, Hoseok’s face had dropped in shock.
“No way.”
Hoseok had a million questions about it. He erupted in a flurry of inquiries. Jungkook was giggling at the hybrid’s enthusiasm when Namjoon leaned over to whisper in his ear.
“Hey, Kook, I think you have a shadow.”
Jungkook looked at him with confusion and Namjoon’s eyes flicked over his shoulder. The younger man slowly turned his head and there, pretending to play with a wildflower, was a hybrid he hadn’t noticed before.
You had started out at the front of the garden, playing with some of the younger hybrids and making hop-scotch. The kids loved when you jumped around with them, your ears flopping back and forth. You were only the second bunny hybrid The Violet had housed, and the children all found you adorable. However, when they had inevitably run off to play, you were left to your own devices with no excuse to avoid talking to the humans around.
You knew the staff was keeping a close eye on you. This was the first event you had been to since you came to The Violet, and you still struggled with big crowds of people. You were promised it would be relaxed and lowkey, and it was true. No one was staring too much, and no one was approaching you to ask questions. The people at the event were conscious that you were a bunny, and the one thing on the pamphlet about bunny hybrid care that was emphasized was their skittishness. When they were spooked, they would bolt. The caterer who handed you a plate of snacks even smiled softly at you, gentle and soothing as if trained. You assumed The Violet actually had trained them.
You had just settled in a particularly sunny patch of grass when you saw him. At first your heart stopped, thinking he was another bunny hybrid like yourself. But you realized almost immediately that he was human. However, the longer you looked the more you could see why you had mistaken him for a hybrid. His eyes were big and brown, and flicked this way and that as he took in his surroundings. He nibbled on his food while listening to the large man beside him talk about something. When someone said something he found amusing his nose would scrunch up in a way you found endearing. The man wasn’t a hybrid but he almost acted like one.
You had been content watching from afar as he relaxed and talked to the people at his table. He didn’t seem too interested in the hybrids around them, though when one walked by he gave them a nod or a small smile to be polite. When he got out of his seat, you had panicked slightly, fearing he was leaving though you had no grounds to. When you followed at a distance, it was clear he was just going to entertain himself.
You watched him look through the paints and brushes in the section for art, his brow furrowing in thought. He was frowning slightly with concentration, though when he noticed the two mouse hybrids looking at him he quickly softened his expression to say hello. He was choosing his colors after agonizing over the options and then he was moving back toward the table. In his arms he juggled the paper and all of the supplies he wanted. You were worried he was going to drop them. When he stopped to snag a plate of treats, you had giggled into your hand as you watched his balancing act of holding art supplies and piling desserts on the plate before balancing it all for the home stretch.
You tried to remain casual about it. You’d stop to admire a flower and debated picking it. You’d made small talk with a hybrid who asked if you were enjoying yourself. All the while your eyes were flicking back to the man, as if you were afraid he would disappear. Eventually, you had settled back in your spot, holding several flowers you deemed too pretty to not pick. The man was starting to mess around with his paints, listening to the people around him talk, sometimes smiling to himself as though he was just happy to exist in the same place as his friends. It was the first of only two times you would think to yourself that a human was beautiful. Not just attractive, but beautiful. In the same way as your flowers, or a sun shower or the sound of your friend Hoseok singing in the morning when he brought you a glass of juice and some fruit to nibble on.
You were so transfixed on the man that you didn’t register his friend’s attention on you. He had noticed you get up and had watched with curiosity as you lingered behind the youngest of their friend group. He was sure you weren’t aware of his gaze as you watched Jungkook wander around. He even chuckled to himself at your expression when a chatty pomeranian hybrid intercepted you and struck up a conversation. You were trying to be polite but the worry in your brow and shiftiness of your eyes told Namjoon you were agitated. It was almost heartbreaking how obviously enraptured with Jungkook you were. He couldn’t help but tell Jungkook about it the moment he thought no one would be paying attention.
When Jungkook moved and you realized he was turning to look at you, you froze. Your head tipped down and your fingers nervously rubbed at the flowers in your lap. Your cheeks were pink with the embarrassment of getting caught and part of you was gnawing at itself with fear. No one liked to be stared at. You were supposed to keep to yourself and not bother guests. You had learned that attracting attention from humans was dangerous. You should have been more careful, no matter how interested you were in the man.
Jungkook was also blushing. You were perhaps the cutest creature he had ever seen. With your head down, all he could see were your ears. One was a warm brown, almost black like your hair, and the other was white. He hadn’t seen a hybrid with two different colored ears before, and he found it charming. Even if you weren’t trying to make yourself as small as possible (like you presently were) you would be one of the most delicate hybrids there. He realized he had seen you earlier, playing with the children, and had mistaken you for one of the younger hybrids. By yourself, however, it was clear you were older, maybe around his age even. Jungkook had only gotten a glimpse of your eyes before you had ducked your head down, but from just a look he knew they were big and round, expressive in their emotion. He was intrigued.
“What do I do?” He asked, almost speaking out of the side of his mouth as if any movement would send you away. Namjoon found it incredibly cute.
“Don’t scare her away.”
Jungkook rolled his eyes. Very helpful, hyung. He racked his brain for what he had learned about bunny hybrids, but all he could remember was that they flopped sometimes and it was a good thing. Jungkook was so caught up in trying to remember what the staff had said about bunny hybrids that he didn’t notice Jimin’s conversation with Hoseok had paused at Jungkook and Namjoon’s whispering. Hoseok was looking between Jungkook and you, his eyes thoughtful before a grin appeared, bright and energetic.
“She likes strawberries.” Hoseok whispered. The men followed his eyes to the plate of fruit Jimin had abandoned. There was a small pile of strawberries in the middle. Jungkook met Hoseok’s eyes and didn’t notice the way Jimin was watching him..
A few feet away, you knew they were talking about you.. Hoseok usually took enough of the attention that you could get by unnoticed but even he was whispering. You wanted to glare at him to communicate your feelings of betrayal but couldn’t bring yourself to look at any of them.
“Jimin, are you going to finish these strawberries?” Jungkook asked, his voice raised loud enough for it to carry across the garden. It was the first time you had really heard it fully and your ears twitched.
“Oh, I don’t think I can. They look delicious, but I’m so full.” Jimin played along, rubbing his tummy as though stuffed when in reality, he hadn’t eaten much.
Your ears were tilting towards them, intrigued by the idea of fresh strawberries. You snuck a peak and saw the forbidden fruit, piled high on a small plate by Jungkook’s elbow. But in the short glance you saw that Jungkook was still looking at you and you felt so shy you couldn’t move from where you sat.
Two emotions were warring in your chest. There was the desire to draw nearer to someone who seemed like you—who seemed safe (Hoseok wasn’t sensing any danger, surely, or he wouldn’t be engaging with them)—and the feeling that it was a trap. Like you would approach the table and the moment before you touched the berries a hand would shoot out and grab your wrist and you’d be punished for not fighting your temptations. You’d be punished for not controlling your urges, once again.
Was this a trap? You looked again at the strawberries and tears began to brim your eyes. You desperately wanted to go closer but the risk was too much. The conflict was stressing you out. So you didn’t move from your spot, paralyzed with the desire to move and the fear to go.
Over at the table, Jungkook deflated. Jimin gave him an encouraging smile and his hand went to squeeze his shoulder in an attempt to comfort the younger boy. Hoseok, however, was undeterred.
“Just give her time.” He said firmly. He watched the way your ears twitched and knew you wouldn’t be able to resist the fruit for long.
“Do you know her?” Jimin asked.
“Yeah, she’s my best friend,” he grinned proudly. The surprised looks didn’t go unnoticed. It was a surprise that you let the loud hybrid anywhere near you. You looked like a leaf falling to the ground would convince you to run for cover.
But Hoseok knew you better.
He struck up a conversation with Jungkook instead, trying to distract them to give you the window to feel safe enough to move.
It turned out that Jungkook’s occupation went hand in hand with Jimin’s. He had a studio where his trainers lead different exercise classes like Bikram yoga or boxing, as well as taught self-defense classes such as Krav Maga and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. It was obvious that Jungkook himself was very athletic and in shape, even in his oversized clothing.
Jungkook was talking about why he started working out when out of the corner of his eye, he caught movement. He stuttered almost imperceptibly in his speech but recovered quickly, fighting a smile at the sight of you shifting your posture. He could have laughed at himself. He had never paid so much attention to one person before. Besides Jimin, of course.
When Hoseok had gotten Jungkook talking, the lull of his voice was almost too much to resist. You were struggling against the movement of your inner self weighing the risk of coming closer. Your inner bunny wanted to hide just in case, but even she was being drawn in by the sight of the fruit lying out, just asking to be eaten. All of your lines of defense were crumbling.
You were moving slowly, almost not of your own volition. It was as if something else was propelling you forward and you were inching toward the corner of the table where the plate rested.
When you reached the table, directly next to him, Jungkook kept talking but watched as your small hand reached out. Your fingers clutched a strawberry, your eyes darted around at each face at the table to see if they were paying attention to you but each of the males’ faces were trained anywhere else though they were all aware of you. Tension was coiled in your chest as you envisioned the hand that threatened to grab you. At last you brought the fruit to your lips and you took a nibble.
It was like every man at the table exhaled. Jungkook was beaming inwardly and Jimin was wiping at his nose to hide his smile. Namjoon was pushing his food around his plate with a small smile of his own and Hoseok was grinning in victory. You made a small noise, almost a clicking sound in the back of your throat, and all of them wondered what it was except for Hoseok, who knew it meant you were happy.
You weren’t being punished. You were a little closer to the stranger who kept looking at you out of the corner of his eye.
“Hello, happy bun. Would you like to sit down?” Hoseok was the first to address you and Jungkook’s eyes cut to him in fear that he was going to scare you away. Somehow, in the way that Hoseok just seemed to know things, it was exactly what you needed. Verbal affirmation that you could stay. You looked shyly at Jungkook and he immediately scooted, practically sitting on Namjoon. Namjoon cursed and also moved to the empty seat at his right. The older man’s grumpiness made you giggle and Jungkook’s eyes widened at the sound. He looked directly at Jimin to see if he had heard it and Jimin’s expression was one of slight awe. Jungkook ignored Namjoon’s grumbling as you lowered yourself in the now empty chair, timidly glancing at Jimin to your left and Jungkook to your right.
The seat was warm, and you could smell something warm, musky, and slightly floral.
“I like your flowers,” Jungkook told you. “Could I draw them?” He asked. You nodded, lifting the flowers to hand to him but Jungkook stopped you. “You’re fine. Just hold them like you were.”
Jimin started telling Hoseok about how Jungkook was incredibly talented at drawing and painting things. “Jungkook drew our friend’s wedding portrait.” He bragged. It was the first time you’d heard someone say his name. Jungkook.
You weren’t speaking but watching Jungkook draw, leaning slightly closer to get a better view. He was not just drawing the flowers, but you could see he was also drawing you. Or at least part of you. The watercolors were roughly spreading across the page, making the image of the flowers in your grasp. You practically preened, making a happy noise as you leaned into Jungkook, unaware of the fact that you were now touching beyond the unconscious comfort it gave you to be close to him.
Jimin was melting, however, watching the attention you gave his love. How you looked is how he felt. You watched Jungkook with thee expression he had only ever seen Jungkook himself make, when he found something interesting and beautiful and inspiring. He was sure you weren’t aware you were doing it.
While you were in your own little world, the afternoon went on with the activities. There were classic games like a two-legged race (which Jimin and Hoseok lost phenomenally at), a game of musical chairs that Hoseok won, and an egg toss that resulted in some impressive work by a pair of labrador hybrids. You watched everyone running around and having fun, and you looked like you wanted to get closer as Jimin and Namjoon entered the tug-of-war competition. Jungkook’s gaze went from you to the people lining up and back to you. Then he asked, “Want to go watch?”
You squeaked in surprise that he had directly addressed you and Jungkook patiently waited for you to compose yourself. You looked back at where Jimin and Namjoon playfully pretended to stretch and warm up, jokingly eyeing the hybrids that had volunteered to play. It looked fun, and Jungkook’s large friend looked strong, like a bull hybrid you’d seen once. You found yourself nodding and wordlessly, your hand moved to grasp Jungkook’s.
He watched it happen in slow motion, your hand moving from your lap towards his own where he mindlessly swung his pen around. He let the pen fall from his fingers in favor of opening his palm to you. Your hand was so small compared to his that he almost cooed. Your fingers wrapped around his and you looked at him with a vulnerability that made him want to place himself between you and anything that even thought about looking at you.
Hoseok saw the exchange from his place by the snack table and grinned. He allowed himself a single yip of celebration.
Jungkook led you to the tables nearest the competition and when Jimin saw the two of you watching he started acting cute, doing little dances and waving. It made you blush and hide in Jungkook’s shoulder, giggling to yourself. Jungkook gave Jimin a thumbs up and mouthed ‘keep it up’. Namjoon watched the whole interaction with thinly veiled amusement and made a note to himself. Before Jimin could make you laugh any more, the staff member officiating the tug-of-war game started talking and telling everyone the rules.
The tarp with mud was pulled into the middle of the field and the players lined up. You peaked out from behind Jungkook’s shoulder and watched as his friends lined up with five other random attendees and got into place.
You were sure the hybrids would win immediately. Hybrids were created to be stronger than humans. However, when the whistle blew and everyone started pulling in their own direction, it was clear why the human team had put Namjoon at the very back of the rope. At first he was leaning back to resist the pull of the hybrids, but after a moment, when the team had gotten their bearings, he turned and started walking in the other direction, the rope over his shoulder. Namjoon was strong. You watched him with wide eyes, huddling close to Jungkook.
Just like when you had taken his seat, this scent surrounded you. It was lavender and something else you didn’t have a name for: but with him close you got a better whiff. It was a warm scent, earthy and musky. You hadn’t smelled something like it before and you decided you liked it. You tried to inhale discreetly, rubbing your cheek against Jungkook’s shoulder. The scenting was almost unconscious. Almost. There was a part of you that wanted some of the smell on yourself, so even when the day was over and you were back in your room at The Violet, you would have the memory of him still on your cheek.
Jungkook was completely unaware of the scenting. All he knew was that you had started nuzzling him and he thought it was endearing. He was struggling to focus on the tug-of-war match in front of him. And when one of the humans slips and falls into the tarp of mud, his laughter is partly at their expense and partly an excuse to indulge in the happiness he felt that you had warmed up to him. He doesn’t catch you looking at him over his shoulder, smiling at the sound of his laughter.
Eventually, nature had the last say. Namjoon was strong, but not seven hybrids strong. The human side of the rope was pulled into the mud and Jimin’s shout of defeat startled you. So much so that you jumped and moved back behind Jungkook. He let you grip his hand, moving his other hand to stroke your arm in assurance.
“It’s okay…” He realized at that moment that he didn’t even know your name. “Jimin is just playing.” He soothed. Jimin. That was his name.
“Is he okay?” You ask quietly. It’s the first full sentence you’ve spoken in the hour you had spent with him. Jungkook grinned and it was stunning you.
“He’s fine, bun.” He resorted to the nickname he’d heard Hoseok use, and you clicked your approval and rubbed your forehead against Jungkook’s back. Your face warmed with embarrassment but you couldn’t help yourself.
Jimin came bounding up then, covered in mud and grinning ear to ear. He gave Jungkook a kiss that Jungkook scrunched his nose at because Jimin was completely covered in mud.
“We almost won.” He insisted.
“If only your team was full of Joonies.” Jungkook laughed.
Jimin noticed you peeking out at him from behind Jungkook’s shoulder but didn’t say anything. He just gave you a smile that left you smiling yourself. Then he excused himself to try and get as much mud off as possible for the ride home. “Make sure Kook doesn’t get into any trouble, okay?” He asked you. He waited until you nodded shyly before taking off.
The mention of the event ending had dread plummeting your stomach to the ground. You knew eventually that Jungkook would leave but you had pushed those thoughts out of your mind. Of course he had to go. Jimin had to go, too. They had lives to get back to and they couldn’t stay and feed you strawberries all day. It made you sad and your ears drooped, tickling Jungkook’s cheek. He could sense the mood shift and to cheer you up asked if you wanted to share a plate of strawberries. Then when you two sat back down you ate all of them.
When the staff members started canvasing the garden, the sun was starting to set. They were rounding up hybrids and telling them to say their final goodbyes to the friends they had made. You were sitting in between Jimin and Jungkook, dozing off, your head lolling forward as you struggled to stay awake and enjoy your last moments with them. In your heart you longed for a different life. One where instead of the staff member squeezing your shoulder and quietly letting you know it was time to start heading out, Jungkook would let you sleep, safe and warm with his scent beside you, until it became so late that he carried you to your bed—no, your nest. In this dream you had a nest of your own. A warm place of blankets, pillows, lavender, and bergamot.
But that wasn’t your life, and in your life, Hoseok was coming to collect you and walk with you back to your dorm. Pushing the urge to cry down, you barely managed a sound as you gave Jungkook’s hand one last squeeze. You two hadn’t let go since the tug-of-war game. It was a heartbreaking thing to see, and Jimin was equally moved when you said goodbye to him, your soft voice floating up to his ears.
The group watched you go and when you disappeared around the corner, the mood was noticeably depressed. Jungkook looked like a kicked puppy. Jimin’s hand was going up and down his back in an attempt to soothe him but honestly, even he didn’t know what to say. Jungkook had obviously connected with you and you with him.
“Maybe we can come back and visit her,” he offered quietly. Jungkook was blinking rapidly, nodding his head.
“Have you ever thought of adopting a hybrid?” Namjoon chose this moment to bring up what he had been thinking the whole day. Jimin and Jungkook shot their heads in his direction.
“What?” Jimin asked at the same moment Jungkook said “Could we?”
Namjoon’s expression was that of self-satisfaction.
“Those were all hybrids that live at The Violet.” He stated the obvious. “The long-term goal isn’t for them to spend the rest of their lives there. It’s for them to be adopted and get to live their lives in a home where they are safe and free to live autonomously with people who will love and care for them. That’s probably part of The Violet’s aim in bringing them here to the event. If anyone were to be interested in adopting a hybrid, they have the opportunity to interact with some and get a feel for what would fit best in their homes and lives.”
Jimin was going back and forth between looking at Namjoon and looking at Jungkook, who was looking as though someone had handed him banana milk on a platter and he found out there was a million dollars in the bottom of the jug.
Then, Jungkook seemed to deflate. He was staring at the table, processing what Namjoon had said. Watching you leave had felt like having his heart wretched out of his chest. It was worse knowing you didn’t want to leave. But he had learned enough in the seminars to know that taking care of a hybrid was a big job. They needed a lot of attention and care. You had to be an expert on your hybrid because they were relying on you to keep them safe and healthy. Jungkook didn’t know if he was up for that kind of responsibility. “I can’t take care of a hybrid by myself.”
The words were mumbled, as though he were just processing aloud and hadn’t realized he’d spoken at all. And he hadn’t realized. Not until Jimin made a disapproving sound and his hand went to Jungkook’s thigh. He squeezed it lightly and Jungkook looked up at him.
“No, you can’t.” He was staring so softly at Jungkook that the younger boy almost missed how negative his words were. Almost. Part of him had hoped Jimin would disagree and tell Jungkook he was entirely capable of taking care of you. So, Jungkook looked on, confused and slightly betrayed as his boyfriend leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.
“But we can.”
© sybilwriting 2021
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jessikahathaway · 3 months ago
Vegas, Baby - Part III
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Kim Taehyung (V) X Reader
Genre: Mafia!AU, Accidental Marriage!AU
Summary: They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. What happens when there's a little more legality to it than that?
Warnings: Explicit Language, Mean housekeepers >:(, Tae's kind of a boob. If I forgot anything please let me know!
Words: 3.6k [Sorry it's shorter :'(]
“So let me get this straight,” Lily said, pushing her hair off her face.
“Vante is a mafia member who accidentally got drunk with you last night, you two got married, and now you want us to lie to your parents and tell them that you got a job opportunity here and are staying with us? While you go who knows where?”
“Yes,” Taehyung said.
“Yes...” you said in an equally soft voice.
“I’m calling the cops on you motherfucker!” Jessi growled, flipping Taehyung off before walking for her phone.
“It won’t do you any good, I’ve got members in the police force here,” Taehyung said.
“You don’t scare me dickwad,” Jessi snarled out.
“That is an unwise decision,” Taehyung grit out, looking at Jessi unimpressed.
“Okay, guys. Listen-”
You were promptly cut off.
“No, Y/N, you listen. Do you honestly expect us to do this? Lie to your family while we have no idea where you are or what you are doing? Do you really think so little of us that you expect us to be your little cronies?” Lily gaped.
You were about to start in again when Taehyung stopped you.
“I know something that is pretty universally accepted,” Taehyung said, pulling his wallet out and taking out several hundred dollar bills. “How much?”
Lily had tears in her eyes.
“How dare you,” she warned, a dangerous look crossing over her face.
“Lily,” you whispered.
She wasn’t the violent one. It was always Jessi ready to throw down at a moments notice. He really pissed her off.
He really hurt her.
“Get out of here,” she said to Taehyung.
“Y/N, don’t push me,” Lily stated.
You shut your mouth and looked down at your feet. You knew this was a bad idea, but it was the only option that would keep your parents safe. This had to work, you had to convince them.
Taehyung smirked and rubbed his cheek lightly.
“Fine, I’ll be waiting for you in the car,” he said to you.
Walking out the door, the girls circled you.
“So, you’re married huh? Where’s the proof,” Jessi asked, looking at your ring finger.
“Here,” you said, pulling the license out of your purse.
The two of them looked at it, googling fraudulent marriage licenses for proof.
“It’s authentic, the seal at the bottom confirms it,” Lily said quietly.
“So, how are you going to fix this?” Jessi asked you.
“I don’t know. I really am lost and... And I messed up our girls week... I’m so sorry,” you whimpered.
“Don’t, don’t pity yourself right now. You’re in deep shit, you got that? You gotta be strong,” Lily stated.
“You’re right,” you said, wiping the tears that threaten to fall from your eyes.
“So, you got married. Legally, might I add. To a mafia member?” Lily looking at you for confirmation.
“That’s what he said,” you said.
“Y/N, he could be a lunatic. Don’t take everything that he says like it’s law, you might be able to weasel your way out of this,” Jessi said, looking down at the paperwork.
“Just ask for an annulment,” Lily said.
“I’d have to wait three days. My parents have already called me four or five times. Expecting me back home!” you cried.
“Listen, if anyone can find a way out of this, it’s you. I believe in you,” Lily soothed, brushing your hair from your face.
“Okay, I asked him earlier if I could get an annulment, and he said that there’s no way. He said that stray members of the mafia would come looking for me and my family, trying to get to him. What if he’s telling the truth? I don’t wanna risk it,” you said.
“Like I said, you can’t take what he says at face value. You barely know the guy. He could easily be lying,” Jessi commented.
“But what if he isn’t? What if this is all true, Jessi? I can’t take that chance, not with my family. Not with you guys,” you warned.
The girls sighed and looked at you.
“You have to play along then. Be his wife, do what he says. If he really is serious and there is a threat to your family and us, then, being with him will solve the problem for now. We will continue to work on getting you out of there. But for the time being, tell your parents that you’re staying with us and looking to get a visa to work here for a while. Just to have a little freedom,” Lily explained.
“Okay,” you said.
“And Y/N, you call us if anything goes sideways. You let us know the second something smells fishy and we’ll get you out of there,” Jessi said.
“Okay. Yeah, I can do that,” you answered.
“Alright. We’ll get your stuff ready,” Lily said, heading toward the spare room.
Jessi sat out with you and made small talk, but honestly you were too stunned to even process what she was saying. Was this real? What if he was a lunatic and was planning on murdering you?
But he had several opportunities to harm you during the day, and he hadn’t. So, perhaps there was some decency in this man.
Lily came back with your suitcase and a couple of other small bags.
“I love you girl, be careful,” Lily said, hugging you tightly.
“I love you too. Both of you,” you whispered, hugging back just as tight.
“Alright quit hogging her, my turn!” Jessi whined, coming forward and wrapping you in a tight hug.
The girls brought your stuff out to the car and loaded it up. Taehyung was still in the driver's side, looking at you with mute interest.
“Ready?” he asked.
“Yeah,” you whispered, going for the passenger side.
“Listen asshole, you hurt our Y/N, and you’ll have hell to pay,” Jessi warned.
“You don’t scare me,” Taehyung sneered.
“That is an unwise decision,” Lily mocked.
Taehyung just huffed and put the car in gear and headed out towards the road. Taehyung was silent and you just settled in, already feeling your eyes drooping from the exhaustion settling in your bones.
Taehyung turned on some music, but it was already fading into the background as you were lulled into sleep.
You were awoken by someone shaking your shoulder.
You jumped up and saw Taehyung looking at you. It was much darker than when you had fallen asleep.
“We’re here,” he said, unbuckling his seatbelt and getting out. You nodded and got out, fully ready to see a basic house setup when you got out. But... What you were greeted with exceeded your wildest expectations.
A huge mansion stood before you. Cut out of the finest stones you’d ever seen. It was gorgeous. Large bushes surrounded the property that seemed to expand on for ages. But the most beautiful thing was a large greenhouse that sat detached from the rest of the building. You could already tell it housed the most beautiful flowers and plants from around the world.
“T-Taehyung,” you stammered, looking ahead in bewilderment.
“Yes?” he asked, sounding slightly too smug for your liking.
“What is this?” you asked.
“Home,” he said, tossing his keys to a man in a black suit before walking down the pathway towards the house.
“Hold on!” you squeaked, heading after him.
“Now, Y/N, the staff here at home have already been alerted to our predicament. But my parents aren’t to know, your friends and my staff are the only ones who know the truth. And, well, us of course. But, you aren’t to tell anyone that you aren’t my wife. You are to play the role, and I will provide for everything you may need,” he told you.
“Who are you?” you squeaked, looking over at Taehyung in shock.
“I’m exactly who I said I was. I’m Kim Taehyung, member of the mafia,” he said, avoiding your question.
“What rank are you in the mafia?” you asked, moving slowly behind him.
“Don’t ask questions you don’t want to know the answer to Y/N,” Taehyung warned, not turning back.
“Tell me,” you urged, standing still.
Sighing, Taehyung turned around and looked you dead in the eyes.
“I am the head of the Mafia in Korea, I’ve been living in the states for at least three years. I’m working on missions here in the US to help out my brothers here. The US and Korea have been working closely together the last couple of years. But there’s always to goody two shoes in law enforcement making trouble,” he smiled.
You scoffed.
“Yeah, it’s the members of law enforcement that are making the trouble,” you said.
“Don’t be too quick to pick a side, Y/N,” Taehyung stated.
“What do you mean?” you asked, moving to stand next to him.
“Mr. Kim!” a shrill voice opened the door. She stood approximately five feet off the ground. Maybe a little more. She wore a black dress that reached just above the floor. It had gold buttons pinning it together. It looked expensive, the way it flowed off her shoulders. But her face, she looked as though she was at least in her sixties. Maybe older. But she didn’t appear to be pleased.
Taehyung visibly stiffened. You looked at him with curiosity, what had him so riled. Even a slap didn’t aggravate him earlier. But this had him putting up his back like no one's business.
“Ah, there might be one more person who isn’t happy about our union. You had Jessi and Lily... I have, Mrs. Blight,” he sighed. You raised a brow but followed him forward.
“And what kind of hour do you call this Taehyung?” she said so plainly.
“I call it,” he looked at his watch, “eight thirty.”
“Don’t be so quick to be sarcastic little tiger, I will beat your rear end so hard that you won’t sit for three weeks!” she smirked.
“As if you could reach it,” he scoffed, moving to walk in.
“Who is the girl?” she asked, unfazed by his insult.
“My wife, I thought everyone was updated. You’re slowing down old girl,” he smiled.
“Taehyung, she’s an outsider. We can’t trust her. Kill her,” she demanded.
Your blood ran cold, looking at her with shock. She said it so plainly. As if your life was forfeit in this matter. As if you were just an insect under her shoe, something to be squashed and dealt with quickly.
“Mrs. Blight, if I kill her, then the other mafia bosses will think I have no principals. It’s immature to kill your wife, especially an accidental one. How will they view me if I create a problem and take care of it in that manner?” he reasoned.
“I don’t care, she will go to Jeon Jungkook. She will sell you out,” Mrs. Blight accused.
“I don’t think so, Mrs. Blight,” he said, already climbing the staircase.
“You are so quick to turn your back on this problem? I thought you said you were to handle this in a mature fashion,” she scoffed.
“Ah, Y/N, this is Mrs. Blight. The keeper of this house, she served my parents when they lived here and will serve us while we live here, if there is something you need. See to it she is the one you ask,” Taehyung smirked.
“T-That’s okay, I don’t think-”
“I serve the master of this house, and him only. You, are inconsequential,” she waved you off dismissively.
“Mrs. Blight. She is my equal in this house. You are to serve her as you serve me. That is an order,” he said icily.
“Mrs. Blight. Do I remind you who is incharge in this house?” he asked, turning toward her, a glare in his eyes.
“No, Master Taehyung,” she gritted out.
“Good. Now, Y/N hasn’t had dinner. Please make sure that hyung prepares her something good to eat,” he said, turning toward the stairs once more.
“Taehyung,” you said softly, looking up at him. He raised a brow and looked at you with curiosity.
“Yes, Y/N?”
“Y-You haven’t eaten either,” you said.
Mrs. Blight scoffed.
“Pretending you care will get you nowhere in this house,” she snarled.
“I’m not pretending,” you bit back. Surprised at yourself you looked at Taehyung. He was smiling.
“I haven’t but I will call hyung and have him bring me something in my study. You are free to move about this house Y/N, except for my study and my room. You have your own room that I will see is prepared for you. If you need anything else, let Mrs. Blight know,” he smiled and turned before heading off.
“Come along,” Mrs. Blight said, heading off.
You followed quickly, then remembered your bags in the car.
“Wait! My stuff is still-”
“It’ll be brought to your room, now do shut up, your mere voice is trying my patience,” she said, stalking down the hallway at a pace that was remarkable for someone of her age. Her black dress billowed out past her, creating a smoke like effect when she walked. You remained silent behind her, but kept looking around the house.
The floors were marble, beautifully carved. You watched the veins that ran through them.
Then it all hit you.
He was telling you the truth.
You had married a mafia boss. A powerful, rich and dangerous man. Who had dangerous people after him. This wasn’t going to be the comfortable life he promised, you already knew that there was going to be something that glitched in the system. You felt dread pile in your stomach like bricks, and suddenly you weren’t so hungry.
Walking into the kitchen, there was a tall man at the stove, cooking what smelled to be like a steak.
“Seokjin, there is someone here you need to meet,” Mrs. Blight said, pulling out a stool for you.
Sitting down quickly, you stared at the countertop in silence.
“One moment, the steak is almost ready for Master Taehyung,” he said.
“You need to meet the new Mistress of this house,” she said, venom enlacing in her tone.
“Oh!” he said, turning around and looking at you with interest.
“Um... hi?” you said awkwardly.
“Hello!” he said, smiling brightly at you. His teeth were pearly white, and straight as an arrow. You marveled at the perfection that was this man. He was tall, broad shouldered and stood with such grace it made you want to faint.
“I’m Y/N,” you said, holding your hand out.
“Lady Y/N, how nice,” he smiled, taking your hand and shaking gently, but firm.
“You don’t have to say Lady Y/N, that’s not necessary,” you said.
Mrs. Blight snorted and looked in the other direction. Seokjin frowned but sighed.
“It’s part of my job, as the Mistress of this house you have a title. I must call you by that title, Taehyungie would kill me if I miss addressed you,” he said.
“But you just called him Taehyungie and not Master Taehyung,” you pointed out.
“Freudian slip,” he smirked.
“That’s not-”
“Oh the steak!” he said, rushing towards the stove and plating the meat. A server came in and took the meal once it was all set. Seokjin was quick to come back to you.
“What can I make for you?” he asked.
“Um, I-uh,” you stammered.
“Good lord, just make her a salad or something. That’s what girls these days eat,” she waved you off.
Anger simmered underneath the surface, but you kept yourself in check. She was purposefully taunting you. Wanting you to snap so she could go and whimper to Taehyung.
“Actually, I’d like some pasta if you have any?” you asked, looking forward to the carbs.
“Pasta! As if you need to gain any more weight!”
“Mrs. Blight! Hold your tongue, she looks lovely, and I will make her as much pasta as she wants,” he smiled, already getting started.
She simply turned up her nose and headed out the door.
“Don’t mind her,” Seokjin started.
“Huh?” you said, turning to look at him.
“Oh, Mrs. Blight. She worries about Taehyung. Has ever since he was a kid. He gets into a lot of trouble. And she worries that something is going to happen to him. And we were all kinda shocked when he said he’d be bringing his wife home with him,” he explained.
“Well, it’s kind of a shock for both of us too,” you said.
“I bet,” he answered.
You two sat in silence while he cooked, you simply watched him work. The kitchen was large, inhabiting a large island in the middle at which you were sat. Seokjin worked around the two stoves on the other side of the kitchen, swirling and sampling, cooking you up a feast.
Soon, you watched as he placed a perfectly cooked fettuccine alfredo in front of you.
“There you are, I hope you like it,” he said, looking bashful.
“Seokjin, it smells amazing,” you smiled.
“Well thank you, give it a try,” he encouraged, leaning on the counter.
Digging in you almost moaned when the food hit your tastebuds. It was so creamy, so rich that it made you salivate. It was so delicious your stomach growled. Seokjin just laughed and patted you on the shoulder.
“Eat up,” he said, going to clean up the kitchen.
As you ate, Seokjin told you about the house.
“The groundsman, Mr. Illich is a tender sort of fellow. He’s sensitive, and I think he likes the roses more than my beauty, which is absurd. I am much more handsome than a blooming rose, don’t you think Lady Y/N?” he asked, turning to look at you.
In something of a food coma, you just nodded at him sleepily.
“Oh, look at you,” he cooed, coming and taking your empty plate and putting it in the sink to clean it later.
“I’m tired,” you said, rubbing your eyes.
“I’m sure, you’ve had quite the day, let me call Mrs. Blight, she will take you to your room,” he said, heading towards the phone.
You blinked sleepily at the window, when you were certain there was a shadow that passed over the window.
The fear you’d felt earlier in the week creeped back in, your back tensing up and your legs shaking lightly. You were about to say something when you felt a hand placed on your shoulder.
You jumped, nearly falling off the stool when Seokjin looked at you in confusion.
“Are you alright?” he asked, looking at your slightly damp brow.
“Y-yes, I’m fine,” you said, swallowing thick.
“Okay, if you say so,” he said.
Mrs. Blight walked in, her black dress fanning around her.
“Come this way, I will show you to your room,” she said, turning her back and starting to walk down the hallway.
You waved to Seokjin and ran after her.
For an old lady she was pretty quick.
You followed her up a huge staircase that looked like it was out of a movie. Iron and marble met to create a beautiful railing that went up the sides and down the middle. The bottom fanned out like a lava pool at your feet. You gaped only for a moment, hurrying to catch up to Mrs. Blight. But you looked at the expensive portraits that were hung from the walls and the tapestries that had to be antiques. The whole building screamed extravagance. The curtains were thick and velvety to the touch.
“Hurry up,” Mrs. Blight demanded, walking towards a room at the end of the hall.
You did as she said and hurried, meeting her at the door a moment later.
“This is your room, your things are inside. Good night,” she said, moving to walk away.
“Wait,” you called out.
You could see her shoulders physically tense as she turned to face you again.
“Yes?” she asked, trying to hold back her scowl.
“Where is Taehyung’s room?” you asked.
She didn’t hold back her grimace this time.
“Why do you wish to know? Huh? Just so you can sneak in there and try to harm him! Or even better, so that you can divulge the layout of our home to the police? I won’t tell you,” she said.
“It was just a question, he said not to go in there. I wanted to know what to avoid,” you explained.
“A likely tale,” she scoffed.
“It’s the truth, whether you believe it or not is up to you,” you said softly.
She froze at this. Staying stock still in the middle of the hallway. You held your breath, ready for another slew of insults, but they never came.
“His room is at the end of the next hallway over. Please, do ensure you don’t go in there,” she said. “His study is at the bottom of the stairs, first door on the left.”
And with that, she was gone.
You opened your door and were shocked at the size of the room in front of you. You had a four postered bed, covered in what you could only assume to be satin sheets. You looked down at them and let your hand run over the fabric. It was cool to the touch, making you shiver lightly.
But you continued on. There was a beautiful vanity painted white in the far corner of the room. You looked and saw that your makeup bag was placed there neatly, with your hair appliances as well. There was an open door that lead to your ensuite bathroom. You tried not to squeal at the thought of your very own bathroom, but you kept your cool. Looking at the jacuzzi tub and glass shower in the corners. You wanted desperately to take a shower, but it was already so late. You couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Your legs carried you to the bed, where you nestled under the blankets and slowly, fell asleep.
Taglist: @ladyartemesia and @infernal-alpaca
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n3onguts · a month ago
goodbye, dignity. | kim taehyung and min yoongi
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summary — there are rules to follow when you’re having casual sex, but it seems you plan on breaking all of them.
pairing — kim taehyung x f!reader; min yoongi x f!reader
genre&tags — college au, fwb au, angst!!!, bts are frat bros, y/n is emotionally-guarded (i think she’s a bad bitch, but others might call her cold), taehyung’s in denial because of course he is, yoongi’s dressed as killua from hxh so naturally he’s an agent of chaos even if he doesn’t mean to be, and also everybody’s sex-positive! yay! but terrified of commitment whoops
warning(s) — 18+, implied smut, heavy alcohol consumption (please be aware of your tolerance, guys!! always drink responsibly)
w.c. — almost 5k
a/n — if u want ur friends w/ benefits situation to work, absolutely do not do what these people do. i might make this a series if enough ppl want but for now the ending is what it is! also i keep finding myself writing more and more bts-related fics but what can we do, the muse works in ~mysterious~ ways 🤷🏻‍♀️ love u very much, enjoy as always and leave feedback in the replies
They say it takes an average of 2 months to form a habit — 66 days, to be exact.
When you think about your routine, think about the trivial things you fill your days with, the actions that become automatic after so much repetition and next steps that seem natural because you’ve done them before, you realize that, without you even noticing, Taehyung’s slot himself into it with relative ease.
You don’t have an exact answer for the when of it all, or the how, but you know he has, because when he texts you to ‘come over’ at 11:21 P.M., you don’t question it. You just think, might as well get this over with, the way you would for a morning class or a vaccination or a vodka shot. And you go over. And it’s always the same.
You’ll knock on his door, and when it opens, Taehyung’ll greet you with his warm, airy mouth clamping down on your impatient lips: no warning, no nothing. And once you’re tangled with him, clothes falling to the floor and limbs intertwining, the rest of it proceeds in chaotic order. Sometimes you’ll ride him like a demon, and sometimes he’ll drill into you like it’s his first time ever experiencing the miracle that is the female vagina. Normally, sheets will get pulled, but occasionally hair or muscles too. There’s also never any musical accompaniment to set the mood, just ragged breaths and the sound of wet skin slapping.
And when you two finish, you’ll crack a joke — something stupid and corny like, “Do you validate parking?” or “So… Do I just go out the same way I came in?” — and he’ll offer an obligatory laugh. You’ll stumble back into your jeans before daylight breaks and head out with such haste Taehyung sometimes wonders if you’re a mere figment of his imagination.
You like it this way. You get to brush over the niceties, ignore all the pleasantries, and never care if you look ugly or awkward or like someone who hasn’t showered in 3 days (hey, man, college is tough, no judgment), because Taehyung doesn’t mind, he just needs a body to cram and you need one to consume, so everybody wins.
Every now and again, he’ll do something off — kiss you like you’re a China plate or ask a too-personal question or suggest you stay even when he’s been ticked off your to-do list — but these are usually anomalies, outliers that you make clear to him are not things you’re interested in keeping a part of your routine.
There aren’t really any rules to this thing you two have, whatever it may be, but it’s never been necessary, because the singular condition for your relationship, saturating your every move, has always been definite for both parties: don’t take this seriously.
Thank God that it’s Taehyung whose dick you’ve been noncommittally bouncing on, since he’s probably the most easygoing man you’ve ever met. Where others might fall in love or get you to fall for them, he’s able to perfectly skirt the line between interested and detached.
It’s only an added bonus that he’s pretty, the kind of pretty that almost seems mundane after so much exposure and then boom one day it just hits you all over again.
Besides his address, his contact number, and the fact that he’s easygoing and pretty, you don’t know much else about him. And you’d prefer it to stay that way.
Oh, sure, you might catch glimpses of the personality behind the fine wall of meat, might form an impression from certain quirks he has (like the ‘emergency drawer’ filled only with apple-flavored juiceboxes and condoms, or the Squirtle plushie that sits in his gaming chair), but you never go past that. You wouldn’t allow yourself to. You’re not bothered by what he does outside the confines of your relationship, the vicinity of his room. If you were, an idea would start to form about what kind of person he was, and that would inevitably make you curious, and inevitably force you to investigate, and inevitably lead to a crush, and inevitably end with the shattering of your heart. It’s the natural progression of things.
So once or twice (or thrice, if you’re feeling extra frisky) a week, you set aside an hour from your day to ruin his bed and maybe your panties.
Like how you’ve just done moments ago.
You’re sitting at the foot of his bed, pulling your socks back on when he quips from behind you, “I should start charging you for all the laundry I end up having to do after your visits over here.”
“Oh, yeah?” You turn around to look at him, an absentminded smile tugging at your lips. “Well, I seem to lose a lot of lingerie whenever I visit, so either I can’t keep track of my own underwear or you're building a collection.”
He vibrates when he laughs, like he can’t contain all the happiness he has in his body. He raises his hands in surrender, “I plead the fifth.”
You hop off the bed, set to leave. Your hands are already on the doorknob when he clears his throat, preparing to speak.
“What’re your plans tomorrow?”
You feel yourself growing antsy. “Not sure. Why?”
“Well, the frat’s throwing a Halloween mixer tomorrow.”
“Oh. Cool.”
“Joon put Jin and Hobi in charge of party-planning and they’re going all out. Jin’s hyped up on making all these themed drinks — I’m like 90% sure the one he calls ‘Paranormal Slime’ is literally a mix of plain Jell-O and 150-proof absinthe — and Hobi’s just happy he has an excuse to go ham at the craft store.”
“I’m familiar with the two.”
“Right. Yeah. So…”
You tilt your head. “So…”
“You should come by. It’ll be fun.”
He says it like it’s a casual invite, like he couldn’t care less whether you go or not, like it’s something he just thought of, like hey, why not, right? But you know better, know when people say something but mean something else, can tell the difference between actual apathy and practiced nonchalance.
The air in the room shifts. He’s banking on your answer. You suddenly become very aware of how his waiting gaze chains you to the ground.
When you sigh, his mask slips into disappointment — but only momentarily.
There are certain things you just don’t do when you’re having sex casually, and one of them is put in effort to see your fuckbuddy outside of the bedroom. Going out of one’s way to do anything implies care. And care, of course, implies romantic interest. And, as everyone knows, romantic interest spells out the end of casual sex. Once you leave the threshold of your little universe together, reality becomes unavoidable — it rams into you like a train.
But when you look at him, eyes betraying his feigned disinterest by practically oozing out hope, you can’t think of a reason why you shouldn’t.
So you say yes. “Okay. I’ll go.”
His face contorts when he tries to tamp down his grin. You want to laugh at how smug he looks.
“Awesome. I’ll see you at 9 tomorrow, then? In costume?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Think I might go as the Joker. How about you?”
You shoot him a smirk, “I guess you’ll just have to wait and see, huh?”
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It’s almost 10 P.M. and you’re still not here.
Taehyung refuses to admit that he’s been counting down the minutes until you arrive — not to Jimin (who offered him a sympathetic shake of his head and a Smirnoff shot at 9:30 when Taehyung asked if he had seen you around), and definitely not to himself.
He keeps catching himself searching each room he finds himself in, wading through seas of sweaty bodies and scanning faces cast in harsh neon lighting. For what? Taehyung hasn’t figured that out yet.
He’s on his fourth lap of the entire party when Jin thrusts a foreign red concoction into his hand. Taehyung gladly accepts (anything to dull the low thrum of disappointment boiling in his belly). ‘Drink’, he thinks Jin mouths — it’s hard to hear over the booming of whatever early-2000s club track Jungkook’s queued up — so he does. Shuts his eyes and downs it in one go like a goddamned macho would.
A pretty girl saddles up to him immediately after, and it makes sense. Alcohol and women go hand-in-hand for him. She’s decent-looking, not out-of-this-world, not you, but good enough for the night.
The girl (she introduced herself but Taehyung didn’t bother to listen) seems to know this dance well. She makes herself small — giggles at his jokes, leaves light touches in the right places, tucks her hair behind her ears all timid-like — so Taehyung can play predator. If he told her he’d fuck her right then and there, in this dark corner at some college party, he’s certain she’d comply, certain she’d give her all to him without a challenge.
You’re nothing like this girl, he thinks, because all you know how to do is take.
His timing’s terrible though, maybe the work of some gods above who are conspiring against him, because when he leans over the girl’s shoulder to whisper in her ear that his room’s right upstairs, he sees you. And when he does, his scope of the party instantly shrinks, blares red with alarm signals as it zones in on you and only you.
Looking unfairly like an angel.
A literal one, because that’s what you’re dressed as.
It’s a scene straight out of a movie: you, staring back at him from across the room. Mini white dress and little, long legs. The angel wings you're wearing make you glow, like there’s a permanent spotlight looming over you.
He half-expects you to amble over, but you don’t. Send a supportive thumbs-up is what you do instead.
Confusion must be plastered all over his face because you answer by gesturing towards the girl currently attached to his side (and who he almost forgot about). There’s a knowing smile on your lips.
In an alternate universe, maybe you would’ve cared enough to break the two apart. If you were a more fragile girl, someone a little looser with her heart, and Taehyung was the fuckboy you turned soft, then perhaps things might be different. Perhaps you’d cause a scene, flee crying and he’d have to run after you, give a whole monologue about what an asshole he is and what a mistake it was, that sort of thing. But you don’t break that easily and Taehyung’s no villain you’re meant to redeem — just a guy who likes pussy.
The girl keeps trying to climb him like he’s a set of monkey bars, and it’s starting to annoy him. It shouldn’t though, because she hasn’t really done anything, except not be you, which she can’t be blamed for.
The truth is: he’s happy you’re here. Glad that you showed up, kept your vow to, because, well, that’s gotta mean something, right?
And, yeah, he’s not surprised at how lax you were about seeing him with some random chick. That’s just the way you are. Ironclad with your words when you say no-strings-attached. Cheering him on like you’re his wingman and not covered in his hickeys under your clothes.
But he is disappointed. Just a little. Mostly with himself, though. Because even though you didn’t care, and even if there was no rational reason for him to, he still did. Still felt guilty when you saw him with her. Still wanted to regurgitate an instinctive ‘sorry’ and make you promises of monogamy he can’t keep.
He doesn’t know why.
Taehyung shakes his head in hopes that all these you-related thoughts might fly out as he does. It would do him good to declutter. Lord knows he’s been trying to rid his brain of you for a while now.
He looks back at the girl in his arms. She’s pouting, peeved that he hasn’t been awarding her the attention she so rightfully deserves.
She’s actually very pretty, he realizes, in a way that’s very clean and constructed. He’s had one-night stands with lots of girls less glossy and put-together than her.
He shouts over the music, “What’s your name again?”
“Sana!” She shouts back.
On the other side of the room, you melt into the crowd, back turned as you glide through it. He watches your wings disappear under the hallway arch and into the distance. He commands his feet, ‘stay’, but they follow you anyway.
“Um— Fuck— I have to— I need to—”
Taehyung pushes a bewildered Sana off. He’s at least nice enough to look sheepish. “I’m really sorry.” He gets out as he rushes away.
He bowls through masses, looking for you. A repeat of earlier, but now with intent. He spends hours entering dark rooms and exiting them, again and again and again until the party’s worn out.
At 2 A.M., once all the people have dissipated, he bumps into a tipsy Jimin stacking empty solo cups in the kitchen and asks once more if he spotted your angel wings at all throughout the night, only to be met with the same pitiful response Taehyung got at the start of it.
Where could you have gone?
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You’ve never been a fan of parties.
It’s not because you hate drinking — far from it. When the guy upstairs gives you a stomach made of steel and an appetite for anarchy, it makes it hard for you not to be a goddamned champion at it. You’re always first to win a drinking game and last to fall victim to the night when you go out clubbing.
And it’s also not because you haven’t been to any, because you’ve gone to your fair share since your freshman year. But it’s always the same ugly tableau. Humid rooms packed with raucous people. Dried vomit crystallizing on grimy bathroom floors. Boys getting sloppy-drunk and girls blacking out. You’re not one to judge, but it’s depressing to look at with near-sober eyes.
After a while, it gets monotonous. So you just stopped going completely, declining any and all invitations that came your way.
Up until last night, when Taehyung asked you to come and you agreed.
What the fuck possessed you to do that?
You were immediately greeted with a Dixie cup of green jelly (must be that ‘Paranormal Slime’ Taehyung told you about) from Jin — dressed like the Cheshire Cat, smile and all — upon entry.
“Haven’t seen you at one of these in a hot minute.” He comments as you accept the brew. He doesn’t appear to be wasted: trust Jin to be in charge of getting everyone plastered but not get plastered himself.
You give him a nonchalant shrug, “Not my thing. You know that.”
“I do.” Jin nods. He’s a year above you, a drama major — fitting, since he subsists on attention. He’s also the de facto host of the school’s podcasting show, originally supposed to be about school-related news but which he’s since revamped as him talking about whatever he damn well pleases for an hour every week. It does pretty well, and that’s how you met him as a freshman, when you signed up to be his sound mixer after his first one quit. “What brought you here then?”
“Nothing, really.” Your eyes flit around the room and Jin can already tell what you’re gearing up to ask. “Seen Tae around?” It comes out more eager than you meant it to.
“Uh…” Half the frat has already caught you barreling out of Taehyung’s room, still slipping on your shirt, so you know they all know, but Jin’s face grimaces like it hurts him to answer. “Think I spotted him in the living room.”
“Cool. Thanks.”
You brush past him, ready to be enveloped by the swarm of drunks littered near the entryway, but before you are, you feel Jin’s hand stop you in your tracks.
When you turn, he looks a little too nice, like a nurse readying to deliver a diagnosis. “He’s… preoccupied right now.”
You know what ‘preoccupied’ is code for: he’s with another girl.
“Ah. Right.” Your voice sounds hollow to your own ears, “Good for him.”
Jin doesn’t look convinced. “If it’s any consolation, he was looking for you earlier.”
“Seems like he found someone else, though.”
The laugh which comes out of you sounds bitter and fake, and you start to despise Taehyung for resigning you to this role — the girl who doesn’t know any better, the one who people feel bad for.
“Ew. Don’t give me that face.” You scrunch your nose. “Makes me feel ill.”
“I’m not making a face?”
“You are. You’re making a face like you want to say sorry.”
“And I swear to God, if you do, I’ll punch you.” You raise a balled-up fist to show him you mean business.
Jin tries for a smile, but it still has ‘apologetic’ written all over it. You’re now determined to get the fuck away from this guy.
“You’re cramping up my style.” You roll your eyes. “I’m going.”
You walk with purpose, but without an end destination. The crowd sticks together like honey, elbows and lips brushing against one another’s, so it takes lots of pushing and excuse me’s just to get to the next room.
It’s more of the same when you arrive: people chugging kegs-on-kegs-on-kegs and sucking face as if it’s a goddamned competition. The music is deafening, thumping like blood through the walls and floors. You spot a few people you recognize, but they’re too far gone to notice you.
And then you see him. Taehyung.
He’s in his Joker get-up, like he said he would be, and he looks distressingly handsome. Could-ruin-your-life-and-you’d-let-him handsome. He’s also with a girl, and she’s the kind of cute you could never be — shiny and basking in it. Stationed in his arms like that’s where she’s meant to be, and you wonder if you’ve ever looked like that next to him. Probably not.
It’s not that you’re jealous, because you’re not. You’re not miserable, and you don’t feel like sulking away. It’s just weird to see someone else wrapped around him the way you’re used to doing. Cements the fact that you’re not his one and only — not that you ever thought you were, but now you’ve been confronted with undeniable proof.
Thing is: you haven’t slept with anyone else besides him in two months. You dropped all your other options, and he climbed from his number 3 position on your list up to number 1. Not out of love, but out of convenience. He fucks you best and he’s the easiest to deal with — ready on demand to satisfy your needs.
So this is good, you think, makes it easier in the long run. It gives you the green light; you put all your eggs into one basket and now this is the go-ahead to get back to your old ways.
But your insides still feel odd and now you also feel out of place. There’s no reason for you to be here.
Taehyung’s noticed your presence and you’re having a hard time deciphering his reaction — across the room, in the shadows, you can almost make out a frown on his mouth. He probably didn’t expect you to come. Maybe you misread him last night and he really was just extending an invitation out of courtesy.
Either way, you know when you’re no longer needed. So you force your lips to quirk up and hope it passes for a smile.
Right about now is when you could use a smoke. From inside the house, the backyard looks promising, wide and lush and undisturbed by sloshed college students.
You’re ready to bail, but you hesitate before you do, pausing to take Taehyung and the girl in one last time. He’s still watching you with that nauseous expression on his face.
They look good together, you decide, picturesque.
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It must’ve rained sometime during the night, because the air outside is fresh and cold —the result of nature's best cleansing agent, water.
The noise from inside is contained once you shut the porch door, and when you survey your surroundings, it seems like a place far removed from the one you’ve just left. Quiet, empty, still. Whatever knot was coiling in your belly disentangles itself when you breathe in.
“Am I dying?” A deep voice interrupts your meditative state.
There’s a boy sitting on the dark wooden steps. Yoongi. A glass of whiskey sits idle in his hands. He’s peering at you like you’re an illusion.
“Aren’t you an angel?” He nods towards your wings. “Is it finally my time? Have you come to collect me?”
You snort. “Not sure you belong in Heaven, bud.”
He makes a face like you’ve stung him, but you both know it’s just for show. You're not particularly close to Yoongi: he's a year older, a senior like Jin. You know he’s Taehyung’s frat brother, have spotted him — at night, on your way out — in the kitchen making coffees, and you know he’s a music major (hence the late-night caffeine boosts), but that’s the extent of it. Regardless, you decide then and there that you don’t hate his company.
Crossing the porch, you claim the seat next to him.
“Careful.” He warns. “The wood’s wet.”
You shrug. “S’okay.”
Neither of you have much to say to each other, but the silence isn’t awful — quite comforting, actually. A reprieve from the emotional hellscape you were just in.
You take out a smoke hidden inside your bralette and fish around for a lighter but find none. “Aw, shit.” You mumble to yourself.
“Forgot my lighter at home.”
Yoongi reaches into his back pocket and presents you with one, “Use mine.”
You accept gratefully, flicking the switch a few times to light your cig until you hear the satisfying hiss of burning ember. The red glow at the end of the stick shines bright when you take a drag, but dies out once you exhale.
Beside you, he’s staring at his drink, swirling the liquid inside the glass absentmindedly.
“Taehyung’s inside, I think.”
You sigh. You’re beginning to hate the association.
“I know. He’s busy, though.”
He doesn’t need you to expound. Yoongi hums in acknowledgment — so it’s clear he knows what ‘busy’ translates to — but he doesn’t offer you any sympathy, and for that, you’re thankful.
You take a good, long look at him. Messy silver hair. Loose white tee over a navy blue turtleneck. Plum-colored basketball shorts. “Who’re you supposed to be?”
He gives you a wicked grin, “You know Killua?”
“From HunterxHunter? Love that show.”
“Exactly. My hair was already dyed platinum so I realized this was the natural next step.”
“Huh. That’s pretty ingenious.”
“Well, that is what they call me — ingenious Min.”
You roll your eyes, but you’re smiling. He parts his mouth open to take a swig from his drink — unfurls his jaw like he wants the liquor to coat the entire surface of his tongue — and after he swallows, he licks his lips as though he’s trying to savour every last drop.
“Needed a breather?” He nods his head towards the bumping party inside the house, muffled by the walls.
You take another long drag before you respond, “Yeah. Not really a fan of parties in the first place.”
“I get that.” And you can sense that he really does, that you and him are alike in that way. “So why’d you come then? I mean— I live here so I don’t really have a choice, but you on the other hand…”
There’s something frigid and expectant about the look you give him, and he instantly understands.
“Oh. ‘Cause of him.”
It disgusts you to hear it out loud. “Ugh. Don’t say it like that. I sound desperate. Like I’m in love with him.”
He tilts his head, “I know you aren’t, but that’s the truth, isn’t it? He invited you and you’re here.”
“You’re making it a bigger deal than it is. He and I— We’re barely friends. Acquaintances, at best.”
“...Who fuck.” Yoongi deadpans.
You groan, put your head between your knees like you’re going to be sick. “Can we talk about something else?”
“No.” There’s a gentle knock on your shoulder. “You sure you don’t like him?”
His next words slide out of him with ease: “Good. ‘Cause my room’s just upstairs.”
You release yourself from your own hold, mouth agape in disbelief at the man sitting on your right. His composure remains the same — no shift in his expression to indicate that he just prompted you to fuck.
You stomp out your cigarette on the porch. “Are you serious?”
“But what about like — Jesus, I don’t know — bro code? Isn’t that a thing?”
He hums thoughtfully. “Are you his girlfriend?”
“No.” It makes you wince when you say it.
Yoongi raises his eyebrows like he’s made his case. You came outside for peace of mind and, in the blink of an eye, you’re being propositioned.
You're incredulous. “I can’t believe this.”
The image of Taehyung and that girl flashes in your head. He got with someone else, so what’s stopping you? There’s an intimidatingly pretty boy beside you and he’s straightforward and confrontational just the way you like it and he’s telling you he wants to sleep with you, so what’s stopping you?
“Believe it, woman.”
“You’re ridiculous. I don’t even know you.”
“You don’t need to know someone to have sex with them. You just need to think they’re hot.”
You almost want to laugh. “And you think I’m hot?”
“Well, I’ve been trying to hide a semi since you came out here and sat beside me.”
“Tempting. And you think I think you’re hot?”
“I don’t know. Do you?” His grin is an open invitation, and when you remain quiet, he already knows that you’ve accepted.
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Yoongi tastes like whiskey and black coffee. He doesn’t rush, doesn’t hurry, is agonizingly slow just to torture you. He maps out your body with his mouth, leaves a burning trail wherever he goes.
You question your impulses when you see him deposit himself between your legs. You can rationalize this decision all you want — try to remain steadfast in your reckless selfishness, argue that you don’t belong to Taehyung and never have — but you know this can only end badly.
“Still thinking about him, huh?” Yoongi quips from below. The stream of moonlight from his window makes the sweat on his forehead glisten.
Too late, you realize, there’s no going back. He dives his tongue into you like it’s a promise, “Don’t worry. I’ll help you forget.”
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Yoongi’s knocked out cold next to you when you wake up the following morning. The sunlight is blinding and you’re sore all over. There’s a bad taste in your mouth, like your spit has dried. When you started sleeping with Taehyung, you made it a rule never to spend a night at the frat.
You’re more careless now.
You slip on your dress — wrinkled after being bundled up and haphazardly thrown onto Yoongi’s floor — and grab your wings from his desk. As quietly as you can, not wanting to disturb his rest, you tiptoe out of the boy’s room, ready to leave.
When you turn to head for the stairs, you bump into Taehyung. He has a towel slung over his bare shoulder.
He rubs the exhaustion out of his eyes and blinks like he can’t believe it’s you. His brows furrow, “Y/N?”
“Hi.” You whisper breathlessly, hand rushing to pat down your matty hair.
“Where’d you go? I was looking for you last night.”
He scans your appearance just as your eyes instinctively dart towards the door you just closed.
“Why were you in—” Taehyung’s face turns blank. His voice suddenly sounds far away. “Oh.”
“Um. Yeah.” You’re in desperate need for a shower right now. “Look, I— I have to go.”
You reach to press a swift kiss on his cheek. The softness of your lips leave a ghost of feeling on his skin, but it’s fleeting. He’s become unresponsive. “I’ll see you around, yeah?”
You don’t wait for a response.
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honeytae · 3 months ago
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kim taehyung masterlist
last updated August 11, 2021: I feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately.
key: ♡-fluff  ☽-smut  ★-angst ♢-old material
Honey, I’m home.-☽ ♢
Breaking into each other’s apartments now, are we?-♡ ♢
Just like your father.-♡ ♢
I have no self control when it comes to you.-♡ ♢
You are my forever.-♡ ♢
Do I even matter to you?-★
Am I worth less than coffee now?-♡
We’re never going to hear the end of this.-☽
You make getting older easier.-♡
It’s so easy to fall for you.-♡
Did Monèt finger paint?-♡
I didn’t know you had a thing for bandanas.-☽
We’ll always be in the honeymoon phase. -♡
I feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately. -★
key: ♡-fluff  ☽-smut  ★-angst
❥-anniversary drabble prompt
Are you flirting with me?-♡
taehyung hyundai drabble-☽
What would I do without you?-♡
I think it’s healthy for him to see his parents showing affection.-♡
You’re such a tease.-♡
Is that mistletoe?-♡
Why are we slow dancing in our bathroom at six in the morning?-♡
I’ll always take care of you.-☽
I know exactly what you mean. -♡
I’m just happy to be here with you.-♡
“Can you just stop being an asshole for five seconds?”-★ ❥
“I don’t like when you cry over me.” + “Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.”-☽ ❥
“My hand is freezing. It’s a shame there’s nobody willing to hold it.”-♡ ❥
“Here? Now?”-☽ ❥
“I need cuddles or I’m going to die.”-♡ ❥
“Can I please have my hoodie back?” + “Can you stop being so cute for a minute? I’m trying to be mad at you.”-♡ ❥
“You’re so drunk.” “I’m merely tipsy.”-♡ ❥
“I don’t think friends do this.”-☽ ❥
“Why did you leave?” “I didn’t think you cared.” + “I can’t do this anymore” + “Do that again.” + “Shush.” “Make me.”-☽ ❥
I’ll make you forget all about him. -☽
key: ♡-fluff  ☽-smut  ★-angst
something about sitting in tae’s lap-☽
something about him finding one of your drawings-♡
something about the boys calling you to help get taehyung out of bed in the morning-♡
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jaminjims · 8 months ago
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anon request: hi can you do an ot7 female eight member scenario a fluff and angst one where they're female member experiences a panic attack, gets really tired so they take care of you.
pairing: bts ot7 x f!reader (platonic or romantic)
genre: angst, fluff, comfort
warnings: panic attacks, brief mention of insomnia, hospitalization of loved ones, crying, migraines
words: 1.7k
You sighed deeply as you exited the private plane that belonged to you and the boys. You could already feel a pounding migraine behind your eyes and coupled with the insomnia you’ve been having lately, you were about ready to drop dead where you were standing.
The eight of you walked into the airport, you pulling your little Kumamon suitcase behind you. No one talked because you were all feeling the effects of major jet lag and were exhausted from the promotions you did in the US. It was peaceful (other than the raging headache you had) but that soon changed when you entered the main public area of the airport.
Screaming filled your ears and you had to shut your eyes from the sudden sensory overload. It did nothing to help your migraine and you almost staggered in place. Flashing cameras blinded your eyes as you walked through the airport and you suddenly felt dizzy. You grabbed the sleeve of Namjoon so you could have a sense of support and stability, and once he looked down and saw your state, he was quick to pull you close to him and put a protective arm around your shoulders.
It was like a domino effect after that; once Hobi saw your state, he reached for your suitcase and started carrying it himself. Taehyung slid up on your other side and held your hand in his. The rest of the boys made a small circle around you to try to shield you away from the screaming fans and the flashing lights.
It was hectic and the walk to the van seemed to take way longer than usual for you. If the boys said anything to you during the walk you didn’t hear them as you focused on pushing down the intense feeling of vertigo that threatened to make you fall over completely.
By the time you all got to the car, Namjoon was basically holding you up and you were breathing deeply. With the screaming and flashing now gone, you got a better sense for your surroundings and you could hear the boys clearly now.
“Y/n-ah, what’s wrong?” Asked Jin from where he was in the front passenger seat. He watched as Jungkook and Jimin helped you in the van, and saw how you stumbled when no one was supporting you. You slumped into your seat in between Yoongi and Taehyung and whispered out a pathetic ‘headache and dizzy’ to answer Jin’s question.
He frowned as the boys all searched in their bags for medicine, all their attention on helping you feel better. The van started driving and as it turned and went over bumps in the road, it made your head pound more. You groaned and from beside you Yoongi slowly maneuvered you so your head was on his lap and your feet were across Taehyung.
He slowly started to massage your head and you sighed, “Does that feel better?” You gave a small nod as Taehyung rubbed your legs, trying to sooth you. They all tried to refrain from saying anything lest it make your headache worse. Jimin hummed in slight victory as he found some advil lodged deep in his carry on and passed it to Namjoon who then passed it to Taehyung.
“Jagi, have some advil.” You sat up slowly and took some out of his hand, Jungkook handed you his water bottle and you took the medicine. “Thank you.”
The vibration from your phone caught your attention and you pulled in out of your hoodie pocket. You suddenly stopped breathing as panic took over you.
‘4 missed calls from Mom’ and ‘13 new text messages’ glared back at you. A few years ago your father got suddenly ill and he’s been in the hospital since. You knew it was an emergency when your mom and sister spammed you with messages.
‘Your father just went into the ER, please call when you can.’ - Mom
‘Please, Y/n-ah. Appa is in bad condition and we want to talk to you’ - Nayeon
Hoseok was the first person to notice your picked up breathing and how you frantically unlocked your phone to call your mom back. “Y/n-ah?”
That brought everyone’s attention back to you and they all felt slight panic coarse through them as well when they saw your state.
“Hello? Eomma?” When it went straight to voicemail your heart rate picked up more and you started crying.
“Y/n tell us what’s wrong. What’s happening?” Namjoon looked over at you and wished he could hold you somehow to comfort you. Jungkook and Jimin almost left their seats to get to you while Jin straight up almost climbed in the back.
Yoongi made you look at him as Taehyung rubbed your neck, “What’s happening?”
You choked on a sob as you hoped that your sister would pick up. “My Appa is in the ER, and he is in b-bad condition.” Your sister’s phone went to voicemail as well and your breath got caught in your throat.
Everything around you became fuzzy as you suddenly couldn’t breathe. Your headache was now raging and you felt like it was going to explode; the sleepless nights you have had recently also made you feel bone tired you didn’t know what to do. All of this mixed together made the rational part of your brain nonexistent and you automatically started thinking the worst and that sent you headfirst into a giant panic attack.
‘What if you never see him again? Never talk to him again? Never get to see him smile? What if Nayeon and Eomma hate you for not answering in his final moments? What if-‘
You struggled to breath and you think you feel multiple hands and hear multiple voices around you but your weren’t sure. You clutched your head and choked on nothing. This day just got worse and worse and you didn’t know how to handle it. The boys all around you tried to remain calm as they tried to get you to listen to them.
Jimin, with the most experience in dealing with your panic attacks, unbuckled his seatbelt so he could reach over and take your face in his hands. “Y/n, follow my voice. Can you hear me? Come back to us, it’s ok, you’re ok. Focus on the warmth of my hands, ok? We got you.”
His soft voice broke through the veil of panic and you tried to focus on his hands and voice. You took a big gulp of air and suddenly launched yourself at him and engulfed him in a hug. You were still crying as Jimin pulled his hands through your hair while Taehyung and Yoongi beside you rubbed your back.
Hoseok also unbuckled his seat belt and went to wipe the tears off your face. The five of you squeezed in the back made you feel protected and your cries got quieter. Jungkook reached back to hold your hand as Jin handed Namjoon some napkins that he then handed to Hoseok to help you clean your face.
“Now, tell us what happened, ok Jagi?” Namjoon inquired in a soft voice. You ended up telling them not only about the sudden scare with your father, but also about how you haven’t been sleeping well lately and you’ve started to feel dizzy more often.
They all waited for you to finish and by the time you did, they all had varying faces of sadness and worry. They didn’t know that you have been feeling worse the past few days and they felt guilty that they didn’t notice.
Jimin pulled you into another hug, “Let’s all take a deep breath, ok? Try calling them back again.”
You nodded and sniffed. They all waited in bated anticipation as they waited to see if your sister would pick up. Once they heard her voice the boys sighed in relief as you almost started crying again, “Nayeon-Unnie...”
“Y/n-ah,” she sounded relieved, “it’s ok, everyone is ok. It was a malfunction in the hospital equipment and they thought he suddenly stopped breathing. Appa is ok.”
You started crying again, but this time in relief. “Oh, Y/n. Don’t cry, alright? Everything is ok.” Your mom must have grabbed the phone out of your sister’s hand because now she was talking.
At your moms voice you started crying more, “Eomma...”
“Aish, it’s ok.” Your mom sounded like she was about to start crying as well. “Sorry for making you panic sweetheart.”
You couldn’t get out any words in response and Jin motioned to hand the phone over to him. He smiled even though your family couldn’t see it, “Hello, this is Jin.”
Your mom greeted him and started to ask how he was, Jin just chuckled, “I’m alright. Y/n-ah got pretty spoked though. No, she’s ok now. Don’t worry, we got her.” He chuckled again, “Yes Ma’am, we will. Alright.” Then he hung up. You must’ve spent awhile in a panic because you had all arrived home by now. 
Your headache was still raging, so Jungkook offered to carry you into the dorms. You were so, so tired and all you wanted was to sleep for three days straight. Jungkook lied you down on the couch and took a spot beside you as Namjoon took the other. Hobi went and got a blanket to drape around your shoulders as Jin started making some soup that would hopefully make you feel better.
You leaned into Namjoon and he put his hand on the back of the couch so you could lie on him. Jungkook then moved to put his arms around your waist so he could also cuddle with you. Taehyung put on your favorite disney movie and the seven of you found varying places on the couch and seats surrounding so you could all watch it together.
A few minutes in, Jin came in with not only soup for you, but for all of the boys. Before any of them started eating though, they made sure you finished yours. Jungkook even insisted on feeding you himself.
You laughed a little as you snuggled into Namjoon and the blanket. You felt warm and safe and so, so tired. With food in your stomach, your headache slowly started to ebb away and you felt like you could breathe easier now. Not even 30 minutes into the movie, you started to feel your eyes close as you struggled to stay awake.
Namjoon looked down and saw you trying it keep your eyes open, he chuckled to himself and ran his fingers through your hair. He learned down to whisper in your ear;
“Go to sleep Y/n-ah, we got you.”
end note: ahh i feel like this fic is not really as good as my other ones, so i’m sorry for that anon :( but thank you for requesting anyway! i love love love when you guys request, even though it takes a while for me to write sometimes, it makes me so happy. i hope you enjoyed it anonie 💜
request something!
taglist: @boba-tea1206
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moonlightalanis · 13 days ago
SUMMARY: For years, you’ve been waiting for a life that seemed to escape you every time you got close - Who knew you’d finally get it by giving your new neighbour Taehyung a bag of sugar?
GENRE: Neighbours to lovers, fluff, literally no angst.
WARNINGS: Alcohol usage, weed usage, vomiting, mentions of animal death, suggestive content, swearing, sex references
WORD COUNT: 30.5K (Literally no clue how this happened.)
PLAYLIST: Brown Sugar D’angelo, Sugar Sugar The Archies, Dive Into You NCT DREAM, Teenage Dream Katy Perry, Tomorrow BTS, Till The Cops Come Knockin’ Maxwell
A.N: Okay stay with me, I have a lot to say about this fic. It took AGES to write, and I literally wanted it to be 6K words and ended out with 30 (I really need to learn how to be concise!) But it’s one of my fave things I’ve written so far. Also I know that there’s no angst and the warnings seem kinda heavy but I promise once you read it they’ll make sense. Anyways I hope you guys enjoy it!!!
DEDICATION: This is for Ophelia, my bestest friend ever, who’s always helped me so so much in everything. I love you Ophelia!!!!
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Sugar. A word of many meanings; food, a kiss, a term of endearment, drugs. All of these meanings, for one little word.
Of course, you’d only ever known it to mean the food. You didn’t use it much, leaning towards the more savoury flavours of food, but you always had a bag of the stuff tucked away in a drawer in case you wanted to start baking. You never did, but you couldn’t stop yourself from buying a large pack of it when you moved into this apartment block a couple of days ago. It just felt right; like the finishing touches to the life you were looking forward to creating. And who knows? Maybe you would start baking.
Today, though, you’re stood in the kitchen over a vase, sorting out the new dahlia’s that Yeji from next door gave you just a half hour ago. 
They look wondrous against the white vase, and you smile softly to yourself at the kindness of your new neighbour. You briefly entertain the thought of your other neighbours for a moment, wondering if they’re as nice as Yeji was. She also invited you over to hers for cookies, and you would’ve said yes if you weren’t exhausted from all of the unpacking you’d been finishing up with. She offered to help, but you couldn’t bring yourself to accept the offer, determined to be the self proclaimed ‘independent woman’ that you never thought you’d bring to life in your early 20s. 
To be fair, you always knew that this would be your life; you just didn’t think it’d come this early. Good friends, a gorgeous new apartment, a good job, a cat, you thought you’d have to wait for a life like this. Of course there was one thing: you were single. You’d sort of made your peace with that, knowing that things would fall into place in due time, but it wouldn’t hurt to go on a date every once in a while, right?
A soft knock on your door shakes you from your train of thought, and you push the peace of being single to the back of your mind as you walk towards it.
You open it with a smile that falters as soon as you see who’s staring back at you with a smile of his own. Is this another neighbour? God, he’s stunning. His eyes bear into yours with a contained confidence that you’ve only ever seen in the mirror, and the way he smiles at you is so wide and welcoming that you’re prepared to give him anything he wants. ‘It should be illegal for someone to be this pretty,’ you think, studying the way his hair falls against his forehead softly and the way he blinks at you slowly. 
‘Uh, hi!’ you say, flashing him a smile that makes his eyes widen just a tiny bit. ‘Can I help you?’ 
He stares at you for just long enough to make you worry, but as soon as you open your mouth to say something else, he starts to speak. 
‘You’re the new neighbour, right? I’m Taehyung. From next door.’ 
You nod slowly, still wondering what it is that brought him here, hoping your silence will urge him to carry on. It does.
‘Can I ask you a favour? I went to Yeji’s — I don’t know if you’ve met her, she lives next door to me — but she’s not in.’ 
The way the words roll off his tongue is honey-sweet, and you reply with a small nod and a smile, still struggling to find words to say to him. What do you even say to someone like this? ‘Hi, you’re stunning,’ or perhaps, ‘Hello, we just met but you’re the prettiest man I’ve ever seen.’ 
You’re never usually at a loss for words like this, but Taehyung is pretty and pretty men do something to you that you’ve never been able to rationalise. 
‘Can I borrow some sugar? I went out earlier for some and came back with a new handheld fan, which was totally not the plan but I’ve never been good at … remembering things.’ 
He lets out a small chuckle, and you find it easier to get past the good looks and just say something now that you know what he wants from you. 
‘Oh! Yeah, sure, follow me.’ 
You lead Taehyung through your apartment and to the kitchen, and you hear the small hums he makes at the sight of your kitchen. 
‘Nice kitchen.’ 
‘Thanks, I built it myself.’
Taehyung laughs, and you’re glad your back is turned to him because your face freezes up at the sound of it. 
There’s an awkward stretch of silence as the two of you stand in your kitchen, your back facing him and him just… standing there, waiting for you to move. 
‘Shit, sorry. Sugar.’ 
‘You’re good. I never got your name, by the way.’ 
Mentally cursing yourself for not even telling him your name before you let him into your home, you turn and flash an apologetic smile. 
‘Oh, yeah. It’s (Y/N).’ 
Taehyung smiles, and it’s polite, but you melt all the same. 
‘Nice. When did you move in?’ 
‘A couple days ago. I just finished unpacking this morning, actually.’ 
He walks closer to where you are, peering around your apartment as he does so. You watch him, eager to know what he thinks of the place. He’s the first to see it in person; Yeji didn’t step past your front door and you haven’t had the time to call anyone else. 
‘Thoughts? You’re the first person to see the place in person.’ 
He grins, taking a last look around before turning to you and catching your gaze in his. 
‘It’s gorgeous.’ 
Your cheeks are set ablaze by just those two words, and you send Taehyung a rosy smile before opening a cabinet to get sugar for the stunning man behind you. 
Reaching up for the sugar — which you’re sure is in this cabinet, though it doesn’t look like it, because this cabinet has spices in it — you entertain a conversation with your new neighbour. 
‘So, Taehyung.’ 
‘How long have you lived here?’
You close the cabinet, moving onto the next one. Taehyung moves closer towards you, too, and you smile softly at that.
‘It’s been about a year. I saw an advertisement in a paper and haven’t looked back since.’ 
You understand that perfectly. This place pulled you in by the ankles and by the bank account; you were sure when you saw it, and you’re sure now. The apartment is perfect; it’s in a good area, the balcony is spacious, there aren’t any rules against pets, and the bedroom is massive. You must’ve been a superhero in your past life to land a place like this, and at such a price. 
‘I hear that. Any skeletons in the closet I should know about?’ 
Taehyung chuckles, and you join him. The two of you laugh for a moment, and your hand lands on the bag of sugar he came in so long ago for. 
‘No, actually. This apartment block is amazing, really.’ 
You believe him; the neighbours seem to be as good as the place itself. 
‘Ah, that’s good. Here’s your sugar. Sorry it took so long to find, I’m still trying to get used to having everything in new places.’
With an apologetic smile, you hand Taehyung the sugar, and the smile he returns is warm.
‘Don’t apologise. It was nice speaking to you.’ 
You can’t fight the grin that makes its way onto your face, and you find yourself glad that you wore makeup today, the blush on your face hiding the aggressive pink flush that rises onto your cheeks.
Leading Taehyung out of your apartment is too quick. You silently curse yourself for not baking, wishing you could invite him in for some homemade cookies like Yeji did a little while ago. 
‘Thank you for the sugar, (Y/N). See ya!’ 
And with that, your new neighbour is gone. 
 You spend the next half hour wondering what may have happened had you offered him a cup of tea, some biscuits, anything to make him stay a bit longer, as you make yourself food and watch old reruns of ‘Friends.’ 
A weird smell from your open balcony door distracts you from those thoughts, though, and you pause the TV, taking a moment to smell the air. It’s burning, you soon realise, and you walk out to the balcony to look around. 
One look at your neighbours balcony determines the source of the burning, and you’re startled by the sight of smoke billowing out of the door. 
You rush inside and out of the front door, heading towards Taehyung’s apartment. 
‘He’s probably fine,’ you think, but your moral compass (and the fact that it’s Taehyung) force you to knock on the door. 
‘Hold on!’ 
The voice sounds troubled, preoccupied, and you slightly regret knocking. 
The smile Taehyung gives you when he answers makes that dissipate, though, and you’re grateful that you made the 10 second journey here. 
‘Hey, (Y/N), what’s up? You want your sugar back?’
You smile at his nonchalant nature, and start to speak. 
‘I smelled burning and wanted to check if everything was okay. Is it?’ 
It doesn’t look like it; Taehyung’s hair is dishevelled, the apron covering his outfit has… you don’t actually know what’s on it but it doesn’t look great, and he’s holding an oven tray with burnt crust all over it. 
He’s just as aware of how everything looks as you are, and he chuckles softly. 
‘Not really. I was trying to make fairy cakes but it’s not going my way at all.’ 
‘I can see that.’ You laugh, with a small look at the baking tray in his hand. ‘Need any help?’
Taehyung huffs slightly in thought, and you patiently wait for him to come to a decision, hoping, wishing, praying that he accepts your offer. 
 Baking with Taehyung is fun. You never thought making fairy cakes would be making you laugh this much, but he gave you his wifi password and you’re reading him out the recipe for the cakes from Google in the midst of laughter. 
‘Right and now you need to mix the— no, not like that.’ 
You giggle some more and put the phone down, gesturing for Taehyung to give you the spoon and bowl. He does, and then stands on the side, watching you stir the ingredients vigorously. A faint smile appears on his face and you catch it with a questioning look. 
‘You’re good at this.’ is what he says, and your confused expression turns into a small smile. 
‘I actually don’t bake.’ 
An expression of genuine shock makes its way onto Taehyung’s face, and you grin at how adorable he looks with his mouth hanging open like that. (Would he look that surprised if you were to just kiss him?)
He makes his way round the counter to join you, and looks down at the mixture you’ve created. You, on the other hand, begin to pour it all into the pink cases he’s got out. 
He’s watching the side of your face — particularly the way your tongue peeks out ever so slightly between your lips — and doesn’t hear you ask him for the baking tray. If your wonders about kissing Taehyung were contagious, then he’s sick to the stomach with it. Butterflies pound at the inside of him at the mere sight of you, and he can feel the start of a crush developing. How sweet it is for him to notice this feeling and actually welcome it, after rejecting it so often in the past. 
‘The baking tray. Pass it.’ 
Taehyung makes a little ‘ah’ noise and passes you the tray. His fingers brush against yours and he finds himself smiling something awful, the electricity between the two of you enough to power your entire apartment block. 
Your body trembles, even after his fingers are away from yours. You’d like to live in this feeling; the beginning of new relationships, when everything is fresh and wonderful and terrifying. It’s a pure, innocent feeling, and God, how you’ve missed it. 
‘Do you wanna do this part?’ 
He perks up at your request, and you hand him the mixing bowl with a smile. 
‘Thanks, (Y/N).’ 
You’re busy putting dishes into the sink, so you barely hear him, but your heart speeds up at his little mention of your name. 
‘For what?’ You ask mindlessly, turning on the tap and starting to wash the dirty dishes. 
‘Everything. The sugar, the company, the baking. You don’t have to wash the dishes, by the way, I’ll do them later.’ 
Taehyung steps close behind you and your entire body tenses up. You feel him, you hear him, but you can’t see him, and oh, how desperately you want to see those eyes looking into yours, those lips forming the outlines of your name, that hair sticking up in every direction, begging to be combed. How you wish you could fix his hair, rake through it with a comb and give him a massage and make him relax between your fingers. You’ve never been one to take it slow, and right now you’d like to grab Taehyung’s face and kiss him as fast as you can, with as much force as possible. You’d like to kiss him until there’s an imprint of your lips just over his. Wishing is bittersweet; you want this to be your reality.
‘No, no. It’s fine. You just get the cakes in the oven.’ 
He does that, his fingers dangerously close to your leg as he opens the oven and puts the cakes in. 
The dishes are done in less than 5 minutes, (Despite Taehyung’s protests of ‘Seriously, (Y/N), it’s fine!’) and you begin to excuse yourself from your new neighbours apartment. 
‘Where are you going?’ 
You turn around, feeling light headed from both the way he looks at you and from how quickly you just turned to face him. 
Taehyung furrows his eyebrows in confusion, and moves in front of you to block the door. You watch curiously, waiting for him to say something as you put your slippers on. 
‘Without staying and trying the cakes?! No way.’ 
You let out a sigh of relief, letting go of the thought at the back of your mind that was telling you that he was a serial killer and cursing yourself for practically walking into his trap. 
‘Oh, phew. I thought you were gonna kill me and eat me or something.’ 
Taehyung laughs, and you join him as you take your slippers off and follow him into his front room. 
It’s gorgeously decorated, with a rustic, slightly vintage feel to it. You smile softly at his choice of coffee table, having seen it in IKEA the other day but not choosing it because it felt too grown up for you. You were a fan of modern, sleek furniture; Taehyung was clearly the opposite. How ironic it is that Taehyung’s choice of decor seems to contradict what you know about him, his eccentric, carefree aura.
‘Nice place.’ 
He grins as you take a seat next to him, and you smile back. The two of you stay like that for a moment, you drinking in the doll-like smoothness of Taehyung’s features, the way his jawline melds into his neck at an angle that would be perfect for you to paint in marks, the way his smile is boxy and how it reminds you of every cartoon you watched as a child, the way he seems to look at you with the force of a man who knows that he wants you, and knows you want him, even after only a couple of hours spent together. That’s all it ever takes, though, isn’t it? An hour or two spent with a person who makes it seem like minutes. 
Taehyung makes it seem like seconds, like just a moment ago the door was opened to the sight of him with a messy apron and an apologetic smile, like you’ve just met him and you’ve also just started living, because what was life before this? A series of fortunate events, sure, but this is the first time (in a long while) that you’ve felt something new, something fun, something gorgeous. 
‘Yours is nicer. I’ve always wanted a kind of modern place, but my heart’s stuck with this rustic sort of vibe.’ 
You hum, taking in every word with the utmost attention. 
Grinning, you repeat your question. Taehyung looks taken aback, like no one has ever questioned his choice of furniture before. You’re honoured to be the first, if that’s the case. 
‘I grew up with this. Don’t think I’ll be able to let go of it until I move into the next stage of my life.’ 
‘And that is?’ 
‘Not sure yet. I’ll know when it happens, I guess.’ 
He turns to look at you, and you both know what he’s thinking. Neither of you say it, though, instead sharing a knowing smile. 
Sitting back, Taehyung looks at you from the side of his eyes, and you almost swoon at how he looks, how his lips are slightly parted and how his gaze has a glassy, hazy look painted over it. 
‘I think I’m gonna start calling you sugar.’ 
‘Sugar?’ You repeat, a small smile snaking upwards onto your face. 
‘Yeah. Without it, we may not have ever met.’  
Taehyung looks solemn, and you burst out into a fit of giggles. Although he’s not sure what you found so funny, he begins to laugh with you, because he doesn’t want to hear you stop. 
You do, though, and his heart begins to ache.
‘Taehyung. We’re neighbours. We would’ve met eventually.’ 
A giggle starts to arise into your chest again, and you can’t stop the small laughter as Taehyung begins to speak again. He opens his mouth, though, and nothing comes out but more laughter. 
Laughter is sweet. It’s simple, it’s easy, and you regret having never laughed like this before. You find yourself glad that Taehyung had no sugar, because it led to such a wonderful unfolding of events that you never expected, but now feel that you deserve. 
 A half hour later, full of talking and more laughing with Taehyung, the cakes are ready. He takes them out with pink oven gloves, blushing awfully when you giggle at that and tell him how cute it is that he rejects gender norms. 
‘You get first taste.’ he says matter-of-factly, setting a cake down in front of you.
‘Uh-uh. You first. It’s your house.’
‘You’re the guest.’
‘You pay the rent.’ 
‘You’re my guest.’ 
The thought of you being his anything sends you spiralling for a moment, and Taehyung takes your lack of speech to mean acceptance of defeat. It isn’t, though, and you make that known.
‘How about we just try them together?’
You grab another cake and press it into his hand, and Taehyung looks like you’ve just told him the smartest news in the world. It’s cute, you think, how shocked you leave him almost every time you open your mouth to say something. 
On his part, Taehyung can’t believe he’s found someone this… cool? He can’t describe it, but he’s being drawn to you, like you’ve mixed his DNA and yours together in the same way you mixed the cake mixture. 
‘You’re a genius. Let’s do this.’ 
Taehyung starts the countdown.
You continue it. 
He looks down at the cake, and then up at you, before finishing:
The two of you push the baked goods into your mouths. It’s not actually half bad, you think, swallowing your first bite and going straight for a second. Taehyung seems to think the same, humming as he takes another bite. 
By the time he’s done, you’ve gone for another one, which he smiles softly at. 
‘These are good! Go (Y/N)!’ 
He whoops a bit, which almost makes you choke on the cake you have stuffed in your mouth. 
You swallow it a second later, and stick two thumbs up at him; 
‘They are good! You did good!’ 
Taehyung shakes his head in disbelief, looking more than anything like a puppy, which you silently coo at. 
‘No. You did good.’ 
‘You did, Tae.’ 
‘Fine. We did good.’ 
Your constant use of collective pronouns sends Taehyung into a frenzy, and he smiles wider than you’ve ever seen. It dawns on you, now, that you’ll have to leave. It’s not late or anything, but the cakes have been made and a baking crisis was averted. He won’t need you for anything else, so you should just leave, right?
‘Yes, we did.’ 
You both stand there for a moment, you finding anything to say to lengthen your visit and his eyes searching for any sign to make you stay. 
‘I should go.’ 
It’s you that breaks the silence. How he wishes you hadn’t. Being neighbours is a blessing now more than ever; knowing you’re just next door whenever he needs you engulfs him in a warm, comforting embrace. 
‘Yeah, I guess. It’s uhh… getting late.’ 
Taehyung walks you to the door in silence, his brain working at its peak to find a way to make you stay, even though he’s tired. What’s sleep to a pretty girl, anyway?
There’s nothing he finds himself having the courage to say, because he’s opening the door for you and you’re leaving, and he thinks that if it’s not now, it’s never, and he’s still letting you go.  
‘Well. Bye, Taehyung. This was fun.’
At his front door, it dawns on him that he can just ask you out. 
You start to open the door, and he decides that it’s now or never. 
‘Hey, (Y/N)?’ 
‘Do you wanna maybe go out with me tomorrow?’ 
The squeak that comes from your mouth is involuntary, but Taehyung hears it anyway. He laughs, softly, for what may be the 500th time today, but you swear every time is like the first one, the angelic melody of his laugh enough to develop your harmless crush for him into a full blown one, one that’ll haunt you until something happens between the two of you. From the way it looks, though, that may be much sooner than you thought.
You turn, and now it’s his turn to squeak. The little sound doesn’t go unnoticed by you, either, and you grin. 
‘Great. Woah. Yeah, that’s great. I’ll see you tomorrow!’ 
Both of you are fighting back unsurprisingly wide smiles right now, but you let yours peek through, just before you say, ‘It’s a date.’
 That night, you sleep with the start of new love beginning to take root in your soul. It tastes like sugar, and it feels like the soft lightness of the cakes you made today. How simple happiness is when you know how to bake, you think, with a small grin at how your life is starting to feel like a cheesy rom-com, where Taehyung turns a sour girl like you into a sweet one with the magic that is fairy cakes and a couple spoons of sugar. (Not that you were terribly sour or anything, but you never would’ve thought that baking would land you a date with a boy this pretty.)
 Today is good, you think, opening the curtains in your new apartment, thinking about your new relationship with Taehyung, looking forward to the start of a new life. Things are just… better when they’re new, aren’t they? You’ve always found new things alluring, loved how hazy and romantic they looked under the weight of the universe, adored how you could feel them, see them, hear them, but knew absolutely nothing about them. It’s always fun to discover them, to hold them between your fingers and unravel them until they’ve given you all that they can, until you’ve emptied them and loved them for all that they are. Of course not all new things lead in that direction, but this new stage of your life feels optimistic. The sun shines, the trees sing with all of their leaves, and soft music filters out of Taehyung’s balcony door and through yours; today has started perfectly.
You step out onto the balcony with your cat Cali in tow, and she nuzzles against your leg. Smiling softly, you take in the feel of the soft wind against your face, and listen to the lyrics coming from Taehyung’s apartment. It sounds like D’angelo’s ‘Brown sugar,’ a song you recently found out is not about sugar. It’s funny, though, how Taehyung’s playing a song with sugar in the title; almost like he’s thinking about you, too.
He is. In his apartment, he’s looking at the cakes you both made with a soft smile, and he doesn’t want to eat them, he wants to preserve them, to keep them forever as an ode to whatever it is that the two of you are starting.
Music filters through his speaker, and he hasn’t realised how loud it is until he steps out onto his balcony and sees you, singing along to the words and staring out at the view before you.
Taehyung’s not sure whether you can see him or not, but he likes watching you like this; in this bright sunlight, a cool breeze, your hair flowing softly. 
You look peaceful, and he thinks you must have broken right out of a work of art, one that Taehyung wishes that he had the privilege of painting. 
Before he knows it, you’ve turned to Taehyung with a bright, optimistic grin, and he’s rendered speechless. You have a habit of doing that, he’s realised, of smiling at him when he thinks there’s nothing to smile at. (Truth is, he’s pretty enough for you to just… smile. And does there really need to be a valid reason to smile like this? No, you don’t think so.)
Your balcony and his aren’t too far from each other, and you think this is the prettiest sight that you’ve seen in a while; Taehyung, mouth slightly parted with the beginnings of a smile, dressed as casually as possible, with a fairy cake in his hand. The fairy cakes you helped him make. 
‘Hi, (Y/N). I’m sorry, is my music bothering you?’
He moves to turn it off, but you grin and wave a hand carelessly.
You hate shouting, and speaking to him like this is not how you imagined your day beginning. Taehyung seems to read your mind, and gestures for you to come over. With a smile, you send him a small nod, subconsciously glad that you don’t have anything to tend to at home. 
You’re at Taehyung’s before he can register anything else, and he curses himself slightly for not having showered or cleaned his apartment or… brushed his teeth. 
To be fair, he was in the middle of cleaning, and it’s not like you’ve done the same. Today, you’re as unkempt as he is, and you think that there’s a sort of… intimacy in that, in you two just presenting yourselves to each other in a variation of selves that you wouldn’t dare to show the public, and knowing that you’ll like each other anyway.
When Taehyung opens the door he already has a massive grin on his face, and it brings one to yours, too. How simple this all is.
‘I didn’t think you’d come!’ Taehyung chuckles, stepping aside to allow you to enter his apartment. While you do that, you start to speak, hearing the door shut softly behind you.
‘I can’t actually stay for long. I’m meant to be getting ready!’
Your words hold an excited tone, one that Taehyung doesn’t miss, one that he holds onto, because your excitement makes his head skyrocket. 
‘Ah, me too! But before that I have a couple of questions, if that’s okay?’
You’ve taken a seat on his sofa, and you’re leaning back into it, and Taehyung finds that this is a sight he could definitely get used to. He allows his mind to travel into what he hopes will be the future, where you are sat on his sofa after a night with him and he’s making you pancakes, or waffles, or whatever you want because he’d kill to have the chance to indulge your desires.
Giving him the okay to speak, and to sit next to you, Taehyung does both. You shift slightly to make room for him, and he wishes that you hadn’t, eager to touch you, even for just a moment.
‘Okay, so I asked you out yesterday. To be honest, I’m not sure where to take you. I’m really sorry, and I really want to take you out, but I have no clue what you’re into. Do you wanna decide where we go?’
You don’t say anything for a moment, just shocked by both his thoughtfulness and his truthfulness. You would have been fine with another baking session at his house, if that meant spending time with him. Dating has never been hard for you, but deciding where to go always was. And today, Taehyung has given you the autonomy that you’ve always dreaded having. Somehow, though, you know that he’ll be fine anywhere. And so will you. 
‘Well I am new to the area. Maybe you could just show me your favourite places to go?’
Taehyung lets out a soft, contented sigh that makes your fingers tremble slightly. Before you let your mind run with that sound, and wonder what you’d have to do to hear it again, he runs a hand through his hair and speaks again;
‘Oh, shit, yeah, sorry for making you decide.’
You wave him off with a smile. 
‘There’s one thing you should know about me, though, Taehyung.’
He nods attentively, and your heart flutters at that.
‘I don’t mind where we go for our dates. I’m just as good here as I would be anywhere else.’
He’s heard you, and he’s processed everything that you’ve said, but the only word coursing through Taehyung’s mind is, ‘dates.’ Dates plural. You want to see him again after today? Even before it’s happened? His chest hurts at the mere thought of it. 
‘Perfect. I do have a couple of ideas in store, but you’re new to the area, so how about I give you a little tour? There’s a really cool bookshop and bakery just round the corner, if you wanna go there.’
Taehyung speaks fast, but you hang onto every word by your fingernails. You love reading, and you’re growing to love baking, too.
‘That sounds perfect. I should go get ready, I’m even more excited now.’
Your neighbour sends you a heartfelt smile at that, and you return it, standing up and leaving his apartment quicker than you did yesterday, eager to get ready and see him again.
 The next hour or so is spent in your apartment, cleaning yourself, deciding what to wear, what perfume to put on, what jewellery matches your outfit. You’ve always been a well put together girl, who’s cared a tad bit more about your appearance than other people you knew. Feeling ready, really ready, for anything and everything was a priority for you; how could you have fun if you weren’t?
Music filters through your speaker, now, and today you listen to ‘Sugar, sugar’ by the Archies, as yet another ode to what brought you and Taehyung together. Neither of you agreed on a time, but the knock on your front door tells you that he’s ready. You smile softly in the midst of your lipstick, and set it down to open the door. 
Taehyung is wearing a pair of black jeans, and they hug his thighs deliciously. (You didn’t mean to look, but can you be blamed? His body is unapologetically gorgeous.)
On his upper half, he wears a white sweater vest and black turtleneck. He looks heavenly, and you make a mental note to ask if he’s into fashion. 
You certainly are, with your black skirt, knee high boots, and white low cut top. Taehyung thinks you are a supermodel, that your beauty could cut through anyone, that your red lipstick is leaving imprints on his soul without even touching him.
‘Wow.’ He breathes out, looking you up and down. You’d been looked at like this by men before in this way, with eyes that flashed red and hands that ached to hold you, but Taehyung regards you angelically, and he doesn’t reach for you, and you silently thank him for all that he’s doing, all that he’s being.
‘You look gorgeous,’ You muse, inviting him in and guiding him towards your bedroom, where you stand before a mirror, fixing your hair and reaching for a perfume. He sits on your bed gingerly, feet planted directly on the floor, and you want nothing more than to touch him. Even just to hold his hand would be worth it, you decide, watching the way he subtly fixes his own hair with a grin.
‘So do you. Wow.’
He seems to be at a loss for words, and you’d like to make him speak. But there’s nothing wrong with a little flirting, first, right?
‘Do I? I wasn’t sure about this top.’
Watching Taehyung’s eyes travel down to your top, you smirk at how he sucks in a breath at the sight of it. You like the effect you have on him; it’s nice to know that he likes you, too.
‘It’s uh… yeah, it’s great.’
You smile, grabbing a perfume out of your closet. After a couple of generous sprays, you turn and walk towards Taehyung on your bed. God, he smells good.
‘You smell great, Tae.’
There’s no such thing as too much flirting, right? Right. You lean closer into him, humming when the smell hits you again. Watching his fingers tremble is like watching a movie, you think, pulling away slightly to observe how they move, how he almost reaches out for you. You wish that he would.
His voice is a soft melody now that your room isn’t filled with Beyoncé, and you find yourself more excited than you were earlier. You’re here, he’s here, you’re together. There’s not many other thoughts you can bring to the surface of your consciousness, hyper aware of how Taehyung’s fingers brush against yours, and how you must touch him tonight. Even if it’s just a casual brush against the fingers, or a caress of the cheek, tonight you must touch Taehyung. You want to feel his solidity between your fingers, understand that he is real, that he’s alive, and that you are, too.
A soft meow turns your attention from Taehyung to Cali, who nuzzles up against your leg affectionately. You bend down to stroke her, and she arches into your touch. 
‘You have a cat?’
Cali looks at Taehyung cautiously, leaning further into your touch and away from his hand, that stretches out towards her.
You chuckle softly, nudging her towards him. 
‘Yeah. Her name’s Cali, I’ve had her for about a year.’ 
Cali allows Taehyung a single touch before relaxing into the feeling of his hand on her, and you find yourself wishing you were a cat for the moment. 
‘Cali? Like… Calico?’
You laugh at how Taehyung seems to understand you in this small way, and you send her away, opening your front door. He follows suit, grinning at the wonder of life on what should be a mundane evening. 
‘It’s a funny story, actually. I rescued Cali from one of those cat shelter things. When I got her I thought she was a calico, so I named her Cali. Uncreative and boring, sure, but it seemed to fit. Plus, Cali turned out to be a pretty cute name for her. She loves it. Anyway, I took her to a vet for a check up a couple months ago, and I mentioned something about her being a calico. And the nurse gave me this literal death stare. I literally thought they were gonna tell me she had to be put down, but the nurse looked at me and said, ‘She’s not a Calico.’ I was literally so appalled for the rest of the day, it was terrible.’ 
You like how Taehyung reacts to your words; smiling, chuckling, nodding. Active listening has always been a big thing for you, but he seems interested, and that’s new to you. You typically refrain from the phrase, ‘He’s not like other guys!’ but Taehyung isn’t like other guys. 
‘Yeah, I was looking at her and thinking, ‘That can’t be a Calico.’ Calicos are horrifying, yuck.’
His tone of voice is serious, and that makes a fit of giggles rise up through you. Laughing with Taehyung was easy yesterday, and it’s easy now, as you stroll down the street with his hand desperately close to yours. You want nothing more than to grab it, lace his fingers through yours and learn the history that he holds in his palms. 
‘Yes. You can call me Tae, you know.’ 
‘I do. I like the name Taehyung.’
There’s never been a quicker way to make him blush. It rises into the apples of his cheeks faster than you can say anything else, and you grin at that. 
‘Aweee,’ you coo, ‘Is someone nervous?’
‘Yeah? How would you feel if someone as pretty as you complimented you?’ 
‘You have already.’
Taehyung has never met anyone who’s stunned him like this on the first date. He can’t find the proper words, but he thinks that you’re what Keats should have been writing about. Not Fanny Brawne; you, in all of the powerful vicinity that Taehyung finds himself becoming more attracted to by the second. 
‘As I was saying, Taehyung.’ you continue, looking around at the cloudy skies above you, ‘I don’t know anything about you. Talk!’ 
What is there ever to say when someone asks about you? You’ve never known, but you’d like to get to know your date, and you’re not sure how else to do that. Asking questions has always been fun for you, but you need him to jumpstart all of that. 
‘I never know what to say to this. Um, I like art. I recently got into baking, as you know, and I’ve always been a fan of pretty things.’ 
You understand that deeply, always having been in the habit of blindly trusting beauty, even when it was out to get to you, even when you knew it would hurt. You always asked yourself: ‘How could something this beautiful hurt me in this way? And will the hurt be beautiful, too?’ 
It never was. It always left the worst scars, the ones that took eternities of happiness to heal, the ones that you still look at sometimes to remind you that pain is real, and you can never truly be free from its harnesses. 
Looking at and being with Taehyung, though, you feel beauty start to shift. You feel it become innocent again, you feel it become angelic and pure and you feel it light you up from the outside in, and you think that if he touches you, he could give birth to that lightness inside of you, and share his beauty with you. 
‘I understand that. I love beautiful things.’ 
‘That makes sense. What is beauty to you, though? I’m sure we have different definitions of what is beautiful.’
He speaks, and he sounds older, and he sounds like someone who’s idea of beauty is certainly more complex than yours. 
And that question makes you think;
What is beauty?
Usually, you’d look around and make a decision based on what makes your heart burst and tear and explode and feel, but today it’s different. Today, Taehyung is astounding, and you can’t pull your attention away from him, from the way he seems to both fit into the world and stand outside of it, above it, from the way he seems to pay attention to you and also to everything else, from the way he simply just does not seem human, because how can a single man be this awe-inspiring? 
‘I don’t know, actually. It changes all the time. Maybe that’s why I love it so much. You can never truly define it all.’
Taehyung nods pensively, and doesn’t say a single word for the next minute. The silence isn’t awkward; in fact, it’s as close to peace as you’ve ever known with another person. 
‘That’s really smart. I agree. Things are better when they’re hard to define, right?’ 
With a nod, you smile, remembering your little epiphany about new things this morning;
‘Right. Makes them more exciting.’
He agrees, slowing down his pace for just a moment. You do, too, and Taehyung feels a smile pull at his lips in reaction to how receptive you are. 
‘So, (Y/N). If beauty always changes, what is it today?’ 
Taehyung knows what you’re going to say. Still, he’d like to hear it; He’d like to hear you call him beautiful, watch your lips move to form the words, and he’d like to commit this moment to memory. 
You turn to him with a smile, stopping him on your walk through this park, right under a pink cherry blossomed tree. He smirks softly, looking up at the pink flowers and then back at you, whose smile is so wide you feel that you may burst at the seams. And still, you’d offer yourself to him. All of you, in your gory vicinity, you’d give to Taehyung, and let him do as he wishes. 
‘Today,’ he repeats.
First dates are magical, aren’t they? You think so, taking Taehyung’s hands in yours and appreciating the weight of them, running your thumbs over the ridges and the bumps and niches and everything. What has he held in these hands before? Will he be able to hold you in them? Will he try? 
You think that he will, from the way he looks at you. Tony Montana pops into your head, and Scarface isn’t your favourite movie, but one line has always stuck with you; ‘The eyes, chico, they never lie.’
Taehyung’s eyes do not lie as they look into yours. They hold the promise of fun, of care, of a four letter word that you refuse to say but will definitely make space for. Looking back at him, his beauty seems to grow. In his gentle smirk, in the way his hands feel enveloped in yours, in the way he still seems to be slightly trembling. 
‘Today, Taehyung, beauty is you.’ 
His blush covers the entirety of his face now, and he knows that he will remember this forever. Even if, in the future, you leave, you wither away, Taehyung will hold this first date just above his heart, as an ode to all things beautiful, to all things undefined. 
‘And for me, it’s you.’ 
 You barely made it to the bakery. It closes at 6, and it was 5:45 when you got there. Both you and Taehyung promised to make it quick, grabbing whatever you could and leaving, sitting on a bench nearby. The woman behind the counter promised that it was fine, that you could stay, but you insisted on leaving, on letting her close up early, even if it was just ten minutes. Taehyung gave her a smile that seemed to convince her, and when his back was turned, she gave you a wink that made you giggle so much that he turned around with a confused expression on his face. Pouting until you’d tell him what you were laughing at, Taehyung became angelic for you, and you thanked the woman for all that she’d done in assistance for the two of you. 
Right now, it’s 6:15, and the sun is still out, but she’s calm, and the wind blows coolly around you and Taehyung, and everything is almost cartoon-ish in nature. Perfect, billowy, weather, sweet, baked goods and Taehyung are all that you need for a good day, you find, and you silently thank the sun for agreeing to let Taehyung shine today. He glows a cool yellow, and you see it burn just beneath his skin, and it makes him almost Promethean, selfless in a way that draws you to him. 
You’ve learnt a bit more about Taehyung: he likes Jackson Pollock paintings, he adores animals, and his favourite flower is a sunflower. That makes sense; he stands tall like one, he faces the sun brazenly, and he drinks in her nectar like it’s a lifeline. 
You watch now as he pushes donuts into his mouth like a squirrel storing nuts, and you coo at how adorable he looks with them all stuffed into his cheeks. He’s yellow, he’s childlike, and he brings to life what you once knew as wonder. For everything else and for himself, Taehyung brings a sense of wonder to everything, a quality you left alone as a child, preferring the reality of things. But can things not be both real and wonderful? You think that he is both. 
‘You look cute like that,’ you giggle, pinching Taehyung’s cheek slightly as he begins to swallow some of the donuts in his mouth. He says nothing as he does that, and you watch him, eyes shining bright and watching him like his every move is a movie, like he’s the Marilyn Monroe of what you’d like to call the ‘Taehyung Cinematic Universe.’ 
‘Oh, thanks! That was unexpected. Are you a fan of complimenting people?’
‘Always have been. Especially if it’s deserved. You ready?’ 
Taehyung nods, standing up and offering you his hand mindlessly, which makes your head spin. Just a couple hours ago, you were almost afraid to touch him; and now here you are, taking the small offering of flesh that he gives you with a happiness that you can only describe as elation. 
‘I didn’t even ask; do you like reading?’
You love it, always have. 
‘Yeah, absolutely. I’ve never really had anything to escape from, but it’s nice to just be somewhere else for a while, right?’ 
Taehyung agrees, thinking that someone could write a book about you; in all of your stature, he thinks that you cannot be real, that you have to be the product of an artist, one that put a delicate care into every last detail that makes up your entire being, from the way you laugh to the way your hand feels in his. In a weird way, Taehyung thinks that the only artist capable of doing all of this, of creating you, is you. Who else could? He’d like to get close enough to maybe try, but Taehyung knows that he’ll never succeed. 
‘Yeah, it is. I didn’t become a big fan of books until recently, y’know? Then I read ‘The Great Gatsby’ and fell in love.’
‘That’s my favourite book.’ 
You’ve always loved Fitzgerald’s poeticism, and you have a deep appreciation for the characters of the novel, despite hating all of them. You wonder if Taehyung feels the same.
Before you can say anything else, he stops, looking up at what you now recognise to be the bookshop he was talking about. It’s prettier in person, with it’s blue doorframe, the words ‘Read a book. Any book.’ painted across the front window in cursive, almost as a way to beckon in people from all walks of life, a spell to lure them into the magic of literature. 
You fall in love with the place almost instantly, and Taehyung watches you silently, drinking in the way you look at the store with eyes full of adoration. He likes that he’s part of the cause for this; it warms him up. 
He wakes you up from the dreamlike haze you were in, slipping his hand through yours and softly urging you forward. You follow with a grin, letting him lead you into what you think is the prettiest place you’ve ever seen. (After your apartment, of course.)
Inside, soft jazz seeps throughout the place, like a warm welcome to a home that you feel you’ve been missing, like this is a small heaven on Earth.
The lights are dim against the contrast of the sun outside, and you feel light inside of you, and you can feel that transfer to (or from) Taehyung as your hand squeezes his. 
Magic is real, and you have always known that, but this is proof. 
‘This place is gorgeous, wow.’
The voice that thanks you is not Taehyung’s, because he obviously didn’t create this space, but he fits into it in a way that makes you believe that he is partially responsible for its beauty. 
You turn to be greeted by who you assume is the owner of this heaven, and she’s pretty, too, with long eyelashes and doe eyes and slender fingers that move to give you a small wave. You return it, and she smiles at Taehyung, too, and it’s familiar, and you like that. 
‘Hey, Tae.’ 
‘Hey, Lia! This is (Y/N). (Y/N), this is Lia, she owns the shop.’ 
He swings the hand that’s got yours intertwined with it forward, and you beam at how connected the two of you are. As far as first dates go, you think that this is your favourite; how couldn’t it be?
‘Hi, (Y/N). I’d give you a tour myself but I’m sure Taehyung can show you around. He’s here all the time. If you need anything, I’m here!’
With that, Lia is out of your sight, and Taehyung is filling it, with his wavy hair and his long fingers. 
He’s looking at you, and you’re looking at the books, but you see him out of the corner of your eye, grinning.
You’re surrounded by pages and pages and pages of words, and Taehyung is next to you, and in all of these words, the only one you can pinpoint is beautiful, and it flits towards him, like it was made for him, like there was no such thing as beauty before he existed, like no other living being will ever live up to the standards he has created. That’s okay; as long as you get to look at Taehyung and to study him, you think that you can live in a world without beauty. He seems to steal it all, to take all of the loveliness in the world and hide it just beneath his skin, letting it show in small smiles and questions you don’t think you’ll ever be able to answer. That’s okay, though, isn’t it? Everything is with him.
 Time moves against you. She always has, and you’ve never understood why, and with Taehyung, you still don’t.
He’s got you sat in the basement of Lia’s bookshop, right next to him, as he reads his favourite part of ‘The Great Gatsby,’ and you thank Fitzgerald, wherever he is, for writing this, for giving Taehyung’s voice a bass that you’re delighted to hear, to adore, to obsess over. It reverberates throughout the basement, bouncing off of the walls and into you with an impact that sends you reeling, even after a half hour of listening to him read.
You picked out a couple of books to buy, even taking a recipe book for baking, and you’ve got them tucked protectively under your arm.. Taehyung suggested reading to you before you got the chance to pay, and how could you say no to listen to the voice of an angel? You thought that it must be a sin to deny him this, to deny him the opportunity to spread his wings and to evangelise, so you obliged, allowing his sweet voice to fill a void in your soul that you’d tried your hardest to ignore. And now, as he reads, you can feel Taehyung everywhere. In your very soul, his (Fitzgerald’s) words lie, and you think that they will remain there for eternities, even if he does not. (Though you’re sure that he will.)
Taehyung shuts the book, and places it back on the shelf. The absence of his voice startles you, and you send him a confused look. Standing up and reaching a hand out towards you, he smiles gently. You take it, focusing on the way the basement feels now that he’s not reading anymore. It’s colder.
‘Why’d you stop?’ 
‘It’s late. Can we finish it another time?’
‘Is that another date invitation?’ 
You have seen Taehyung blush more than a few times tonight, but you will never tire of how it makes him glow quietly, how he becomes something shy and timid, before returning to all of his confidence. 
‘If you want another one, that is.’ 
‘I do,’ you say, bringing your purse out to pay for your books. Taehyung watches for a moment, and as soon as you begin to swipe your card, presses his hand in front of the machine.
‘Wha—‘ you begin, glaring slightly at your date. He just grins, taking his own card out and swatting your hand away.
‘Taehyung, let me—‘
And he won’t hear anymore, swiping his card across the machine and putting it away with a satisfied grin. You groan, mumbling that ‘He shouldn’t,’ and that ‘You’ll pay him back.’
‘No, you won’t. It’s a gift.’
‘Can I get you anything?’ 
Taehyung shakes his head no, and with a smirk, adds on, ‘You’re a gift.’
What will you do with him?
 Questions like that always have answers, but you’re at your front door, and you still haven’t figured out the answer. So you ask yourself again; What do you do with a man that calls you sugar and reads to you in the basement of a bookshop?
Outside your door, you get the genius idea to kiss him. You’ve always been good with your words, but you’re better with your touch, and you want to kiss Taehyung. 
‘I had fun tonight, you know.’ 
‘Did you, sugar?’
It’s funny how he calls you sugar when the taste of it reminds you of him, but you don’t say that, enjoying the way the pet-name rolls off of his tongue too much. 
‘I did. And I, uh…’ You trail off, taking a step closer to him, deciding that it’s now or never, wondering if he’s picking up your hints.
His hands tremble as he takes yours in them, just after you speak and just before he does;
‘I really like you, Taehyung.’ 
Small confessions like these are Taehyung’s favourite part of new relationships, and yours makes his head spin. 
‘I really like you, too, sugar.’ 
The sun has not set yet, and you feel her rising even more, you think, tiptoeing up to reach Taehyung’s lips. He doesn’t move, and you smile before you press your lips to his. It takes him a moment to kiss back, but when he does it’s with fervour, with a force that you’ve only ever given out, never received, and you know that Taehyung likes you just as much as you like him, and that makes you kiss him harder, makes you grab his face and pull him closer. He smiles into you, and you move your tongue against his with a lightness that you think will make him desperate for more. You’re right; he pulls you flush against him by your hips, and wraps you in between his arms and his lips, and he’s a firm, solid thing against you and inside of you, and you forget everything except him, and the way he seems to tell you everything he cannot yet say in this one kiss.
You’re smiling when he pulls away, and your chest is heaving forcefully, and Taehyung still has a hand on your face. He caresses your cheek with his thumb, slightly, and smiles. 
‘How was that?’ 
As if the irregularity of your breath wasn’t enough for him. 
‘Top 3, definitely.’ 
Taehyung feigns a gasp, and you laugh, pushing him slightly. 
‘Not 3, right?’
You shake your head softly. 
‘Not 2?’ 
Another shake. 
You grin, watching him think about what to do next, all of the cogs in his brain turning at the prospect of you. You’re stunned, still, by the force of him, by the way that you still seem to feel him against you even though he’s not touching you, by the way he still wants you, after hours already spent together. 
‘It’s 9pm, you know. Or it was when we left Lia’s.’ 
He frowns at the revelation he’s just made, as if it dampens the plans he had for you both. Even so, you’ll give him the chance to see you again. 
‘It is. I should get in, get some sleep.’ 
‘Yeah… Yeah, same. Sleep. Yeah.’ 
Taehyung rambles, slightly, and you press another kiss to his lips, an attempt to make him silent. It works. 
‘Goodnight, Taehyung.’ 
‘Night, sugar.’
When you get in and close your door, a muffled, ‘Yes!’ makes you giggle, before you turn your lights off and call it a night.
 Dreaming tonight teaches you a single thing, in the midst of nonsense; the Taehyung in your dreams and the Taehyung that you held in your arms a couple of hours ago are dangerously similar. So much so that the only reason you know you’re dreaming of him is the fact that you’re in a bed. It’s not his, and you know that much, because Cali is curled up besides you, and she’s yours. Now that you’ve thought about it, everything in this room is yours, the slide-drawer wardrobe, the makeup sprawled out across the floor, everything belongs to you. And yet, the one thing you want the most is a door away. Life just works like that sometimes. You don’t know when you’ll see him again, but you know that you will, so you let your eyes send you back to sleep with the promise that, soon, you’ll be waking up to him.
The morning comes by in a few blinks, you realise, because it’s 11am before you know it and you’re scrolling through social media, thinking of Taehyung whenever you scroll past anything related to baking. Actually, thinking of him whenever you see anything, really. It’s strange how you seem to think of him even in the most mundane moments, even when you aren’t doing anything at all.
In his apartment, Taehyung finds himself realising the same, that he thinks of you every time he breathes, and that you fill him with a warmth that’s almost intoxicating. 
It’s this that pushes him to his laptop, to book a baking class to get better at baking so he can impress (and teach) you. 
Booking tickets is relatively easy, he thinks, pressing a couple of buttons to confirm the class.
Only after does he realise that he’s booked a couples booking class instead of a singles one, and he cries out a very loud, ‘Fuck!’ That you would’ve paid more attention to if you weren’t cooing adorably at the way Cali curls up next to you at the sight of a different cat on your screen. 
Taehyung can’t do anything but pay attention to his laptop screen, to the screen that reads ‘Couples baking class, booked by Kim Taehyung.’ and a bunch of other stuff he should’ve made the extra effort to read. He didn’t, though, and now he’s here, so there’s no point in regret. What he needs is a solution. (Not that this is that big of a solution — Taehyung’s always been a tad dramatic.)
He walks over to your apartment with the speed of a superhero. It’s not that far, but he’s still quick, so quick that his chest heaves slightly when you open the door. That could just be the way you make him feel though, he notes, feeling his heart rate pick up when you send him a slightly surprised smile. 
‘Hi, sugar.’
‘Hey, Taehyung. What’s up, do you wanna come in?’
You step aside instinctively, and he smiles weakly as he speeds into your apartment.
As soon as his feet hit the floor of your front room, he begins to pace up and down, muttering to himself. 
Watching him for a moment, you let yourself get lost in the artful, messy way that he moves. He reminds you, in this moment, of your old friend Mark Lee, who moved in the same eccentric, uncontainable way. 
‘Taehyung. You okay?’
‘Okay, so. I don’t know if you’ve grasped this already but I’m not the brightest apple in the bunch. Is that even the saying? Whatever. I was meant to book tickets to a baking class and I did that, but my stupid ass booked a couples baking class instead of a singles one and they’re non-refundable and now I don’t know what to do because I can’t show up alone and I can’t not show up—’
‘I’ll go with you.’
It’s cute how flustered he was at this minor, easily solvable problem, but it’s cuter how shocked he looks right now, how his lips are slightly parted and how his eyebrows are slightly raised. You don’t think you’ll ever tire of shutting him up, as much as you love to hear him speak.
Disbelief spills from him, and he takes a ginger seat on the edge of your couch, taking up as little space in your home but almost all of the space in your heart, and you find yourself almost falling. So you sit down, you sit next to him and urge him to sit back, to take up more space in your life so that the space he’s holding in your heart will just make a tiny bit more sense.
You’ve never really been one to dwell on what makes sense and what doesn’t, because most things don’t tend to, but up until Taehyung, you’d truly forgotten how nice it is when things make sense, when they just fit. Kinda like he does in the middle of your couch.
‘Yeah, I’ll come.’
‘Won’t it be weird?’
His voice is unsure, and it’s the first time you’ve heard it like that, and you shouldn’t be enjoying it, his discomfort, but you like that he’s sharing it with you, so you grin.
‘Course not. Call it a second official date, right?’
The discomfort on Taehyung’s part dissipates into a sense of ease, one that you’re responsible for, one that sends him into a sort of small Heaven on Earth, where you say things he sometimes can’t bring himself to, where you understand that even unbridled confidence like his has its limits. He now understands that you’re beginning to fill gaps that he’d always been aware of, and that he’s his own person without you, but he’s more him when he’s with you. Nothing makes sense as much as that, Taehyung decides, and it’s this that makes him sit up straight on your couch.
He then nods, your presence reducing him to a mere candle in the wind; a temporary thing, a fleeting one. You smile assuredly, and he relaxes into your couch, letting his eyes flutter shut.
‘You’re a lifesaver, sugar.’
That’s all he says, and you don’t reply, just grinning as you go about the rest of your errands; washing dishes, hanging up clothes. He’s beginning to permeate the rest of your life, you realise, his presence solid and unwavering on your living room sofa. That’s a nice thought; it makes the sun peek out of the clouds, soaking up his skin in all of its glory and wonder. You find yourself watching him nap for a minute, not knowing or caring when he fell asleep, glad that he’s here, because he seems to paint your life in colours that you’ve never seen before, in shades of pink and blue and yellow and orange and a colour that you can’t name just yet, the colour that you felt last night when you kissed him. You smile, thinking that you’ll need to kiss him a few more times to truly grasp what that colour is, so that you can hold it in your hands and so that you can always see hues of him in the universe, even when it pulls you away from him. That’s comforting; knowing that wherever you go, whatever you do, you will never be able to escape the colour of Kim Taehyung. 
 ‘I seriously can’t believe I fell asleep on your sofa. I’m so sorry, oh my goodness.’
Taehyung woke up about 10 minutes ago, looking nothing but lost as his eyes flitted around an apartment that looked nothing like his. He only let himself relax after he heard you, humming an old 90s song softly to yourself as you made a cup of tea. You’d offered him one straight away, but he refused, instead choosing to apologise profusely for falling asleep at your place instead of his. 
‘Seriously, Taehyung, it’s fine. Not like it bothered me. Did I wake you, though?’ 
He shakes his head assuredly, eyebrows furrowed and mouth pulled into a frown. 
‘God, I’m so embarrassed. Can’t believe it’s only been one date and I’m already falling asleep at your house.’ 
Taehyung puts his head in his hands, and you can’t stop the string of giggles that fall from your mouth as you watch the drama king himself, as he convinces himself that what he just did is the worst thing that’s ever happened. 
‘Taehyung, love,’ His head shoots up, his heart racing and palms beginning to sweat just a tad as you speak, ‘It’s fine. I would have woken you if you were bothering me.’ 
‘But still, sugar.’ He stretches the ‘still’ , whining about how, ‘you’ve only been on one date’ and how he ‘can’t keep fucking up.’ 
You don’t think that he’s fucked up, though, enjoying the light snores he let out from your sofa and the way he seems to fit into your life perfectly even without doing anything at all. You wouldn’t even allow yourself to romanticise him in his lack of consciousness, because he’s been nothing but perfect in the couple of days that you’ve known him, and to be honest you can’t think of a way to make Taehyung any better than he already is. 
‘Taehyung. Listen. I know we’ve only been on one date. But I like spending time with you. And I like you. I’d let you sleep on my sofa any day. ‘Kay?’ 
You take his face in your hands, and he stiffens for a moment, softening when you caress his firm cheekbone ever so softly, becoming putty in your hands, becoming something malleable, and it’s all for you. It’s an honour, you think, to have this solid of a man and to have him melt, just for you. Being the only person that gets to see this feels selfish, but you’ve never truly minded keeping things to yourself, always thinking that you knew how to treat them more than well enough. You can say the same for Taehyung; when you press a soft kiss to his lips today, it’s caring, it’s lovely, it’s dizzying, and it’s full of pride. You are the only person that kisses him like this. You. 
‘You’re amazing, sugar.’ 
His breath is irregular, and his voice hitches in his throat, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that he thinks you’re phenomenal. And you, him. 
‘So are you, love.’ 
 Days without Taehyung drag by, you realise, waiting for the day in which the two of you will attend a couples baking class. Of course, you’re not truly without him; you speak to him daily, whether it’s on the phone or briefly at either of your front doors. You’re quickly finding that you cannot function properly without hearing from him at least once a day, and you stop to think about that for a moment. Taehyung has been in your life for a month now, and the relationship can be defined as a mere casual one, but you cannot fathom living in this new apartment without him by your side. Occasionally, he’ll pop round and ask for a bag of sugar, and the two of you laugh with the happiness of a shared inside joke floating around in your eyes, and his fingers brush against yours, and you smile knowingly, feeling exactly what he does, but not saying anything, letting Taehyung’s expression and your grin speak for themselves. In those moments, the two of you are ethereal, fragmental beings, in the liminal space between your apartment and the rest of the entire world; and the two of you are together in the middle of it all, and you decide in those moments that Taehyung is the best thing to happen to you in a while. 
Truly, he is angelic. In the way he sings as he goes about his daily life, and blushes something awful when you compliment him, in the way he seems to move in an amalgamation of poetry and clumsiness through the soft air of your apartment when he comes over to get sugar or merely to say hi. You’ve learnt more about him, too. You’ve learnt that Taehyung is funny, that he practiced the art of humour for years because he thought no one would like him otherwise, that he is passionate, about self-care, about the planets and the stars and everything underneath them but especially about love, because in his words it’s ‘the only thing that keeps the world turning in this way.’ You’ve learnt that he paints, he journals, he reads, he’s an ongoing inventive machine that feels an insatiable need to create. When you asked about that yesterday afternoon, as he stood in the doorway of your apartment, he smiled at you playfully, saying that he couldn’t just keep things bottled up. You began to reply, to relate to him and bring the two of you even closer than you were becoming, but Taehyung took your face in his hands and placed the softest kiss on your lips that you’d ever felt, and when he pulled away, he said, ‘Like that. I couldn’t keep it in.’ You smiled so hard that you thought you’d crack open with affection for the clumsy, gorgeous man standing opposite you. 
And, God, is he beautiful? You think that angels must have cried over him, that they must have given him even more than just a smidge of the beauty that they possess, because although he moves clumsily, he looks more than anything like an angel in the wind, and you almost want to break the roof off of your apartment and curse yourself for even daring to contain him, because you think that unbridled, messy, angelic beauty like that must be displayed. When you tell him this, that he is beautiful, he says that it’s because of you, and you fall and you stumble and you trip into devotion to him, and you almost feel your knees quiver as you buckle beneath the weight of Taehyung, in all of his majesty.
Today is your second official date. He’s been sat on your bed comfortably for the past half hour, playing with Cali. You’ve just told him that he doesn’t have to wait, that he can go home if he really wants to. 
‘Nah,’ he shrugs, stroking Cali mindlessly. She purrs under his touch, and you like that she likes him, knowing you’d have a problem if she didn’t. ‘I like your company.’
Everyday you speak to Taehyung, and everyday he finds new ways to make you blush, to make you ache with the weight of your desire for him. And you almost buckle under it all, under the way he looks at you with half lidded eyes, under the way his lips feel on yours, under the way he seems to look the sun straight in her eye and challenge the way she shines. And still, you stand. But you don’t think it’ll be long before he makes you fall. And, oh, how you will welcome it. 
‘I’m almost done.’
You spritz a bit of perfume onto yourself before turning towards Taehyung, who looks just as shocked now as he did on your first date. That seems like ages ago, and maybe it was, but the look he’s giving you places you right back in the hazy remnants of that memory, and you find yourself liking the continuity he gives you.
‘Okay, well the class starts at 12:30 and it’s… 11:30 now, so we should be good.’
Taehyung doesn’t mind being late, he told you, and you are the opposite, but you’d gladly be late if you could just exist like this with him; in your room, peaceful silences stretching across time as you get ready, only breaking when either of you find something interesting to say. You barely ever have interesting things to say, and you aren’t the best at multitasking, so you let Taehyung speak. He does, and it amazes you how insightful his words always are, and how intriguing and alluring he seems to make even the most basic of conversations. 
‘I’m done!’ You say, buckling your shoes and flashing Taehyung a sweet smile, one that sends him reeling.
‘Well, let’s go!’
 And you do. 5 minutes later, in the car park of your apartment block, Taehyung’s hand searches for yours while his eyes search for his car, and you like being linked with him in this simple, small, incredibly adoring way. You think that holding hands is one of life's simple beauties, and you think that letting Taehyung hold your hand is body language for saying, 'I'll go anywhere with you, just please don’t let me go.’ 
And he hears those unspoken words, because his grip on your hand is firm, and he takes the lead, and you let him, because you think that he knows things about the world that are still hazy to you, and you are more than eager to learn the wisdom he holds in the vast field of his consciousness. 
On his part, Taehyung thinks the same. He’s in front of you, sure, and he’s physically taking the lead, but he feels that he never would’ve gone to this baking class if not for you, and he feels that you know things about the world that he doesn’t, and he wants to learn the intricacies of wisdom that he feels in your hands more than he’s ever wanted anything else. 
It’s funny, that the two of you hadn’t realised how much you needed each other until you met, and now that you’re here together, all you can think of is how excited you are to learn from the other, until neither of you are sure who’s who. 
One thing that you’re sure belongs to Taehyung, on this cool autumn afternoon, is his car. Next to it lies a strawberry red car, that he tells you belongs to an old friend of his, and his is navy blue, and it’s lean, and you don’t ever really appreciate the beauty of cars, but today you may start.
‘Woah, Taehyung. Your car is gorgeous.’
He pats the hood of it with a smile, and you grin at how lovingly he treats it, and it reminds you of how he touched you just a day ago, when he said he couldn’t keep things bottled up and when he kissed you. He must not even have the capacity to treat anything roughly, you think, because the way his fingers touch everything so lightly, even you, is with care, respect, and adoration. 
‘Thank you, sugar.’ Is his prideful reply, as he opens the door for you. Closing it in seconds, he’s next to you in the driver’s seat before you can process his gentlemanly behaviour, and you thank him softly. He grins, passing you his phone with the prospect of playing music. 
‘Are you sure?’
He says nothing else but his password, and you find your way through his phone, giggling softly at how adorable his lock and home screen are, finally landing on spotify after getting distracted and snapping a few pictures of the two of you and airdropping them to yourself. Taehyung smiles and poses accordingly, and it dawns on you that you will remember this moment forever, and that whatever song you play now will never be separate from this memory. 
So you play Maxwell. His first album, specifically, and it’s from your soul playlist. You’ve always had a soft spot for soul, jazz, blues, any variation of music that feels smooth as it enters your ears and you’d imagine to taste like honey. 
‘This is so good. What is it?’
Compliments on your music taste add years to your lifespan, you think, and compliments from Taehyung make you live forever. You smile in reply, telling him that the song is called '‘Till the cops come knockin’’ and singing along lowly as he bops his head rhythmically.
The beginnings of a smile trace the outline of his lips, and you watch him, giggling. It doesn’t take long for him to join you, and the two of you laugh over the sound of Maxwell’s gorgeous singing, and you think that this is beautiful. Easy, effortless, fun; that’s what beauty is today. You remember telling Taehyung that it changes, that everyday, beauty is something new. But nowadays, it’s always Taehyung. He is a new constant, one that you find yourself getting used to, perhaps more than you should. But you look over at him, and he’s still singing, and you think that this is a sight you’d love to get used to. After all, this is what eyes are for, right? Watching and witnessing beautiful things as they unfold in front of you. 
 He pulled up to the building about 20 minutes later, and the car ride was mostly silent, save for Taehyung’s voice over songs that you played because he knew, and your little compliments about his voice that you said to see him blush. 
Right now, you’re both stood outside of the building, and he’s looking at you with a faint smile that you can’t trace the reason for. 
‘What’s that smile for?’
He looks down, the smile widening, and links your hand through his. 
‘I’m just glad you came with me. Thank you.’
You let Taehyung pull you forward, and you decide to focus on anything but the fact that you might be falling in love with this boy, because you’ve always been a rational person, but he’s taking away your ability to think with your brain, and you want to savour this, his hand between yours, without thinking of the L word, because it’s not that serious yet, and it doesn’t need to be. 
On his part, Taehyung is sure that he’s falling in love with you. See, he’s never been a rational person, especially not when it comes to love, so what’s the use in being one now? He might not say it — he’s afraid of scaring you off — but he absolutely will think it. And falling is a process, right? Just because he’s falling doesn’t mean he’s there yet. You may not be there for months, but everytime you smile at him you speed it up in his mind, and he’s sure he’ll feel it before you do. Not that it’s a problem to him; he thinks he’ll have had enough if you just hold his hand and keep kissing him (for now). 
‘I waa gonna say that we should probably start acting like a couple, but I think we’ve got that down,’ you say, chuckling and swinging your interconnected hands forward slightly. Taehyung watches you, enamored with the confident, contained way you move, and he wonders who you could be if anyone ever set you free. He wants to ask; What’s holding you back, sugar? Is it yourself? Or is it someone else?
But you grin as the receptionist tells you how gorgeous the two of you are, and he pushes those questions away, finding that he’d like you either way; contained or uncontained. 
‘Thank you, we actually get that a lot!’
You wink at the receptionist, and, won over by your charm, she giggles, finding herself enamoured with you, just like Taehyung is. 
‘I’m sure you do! So if you just go through there, the class will be starting in about 5 minutes. Have a good one!’ 
 Baking classes are easy, Taehyung thinks, pouring sugar into a mixing bowl as you whisk it, and smiling at how your tongue peeks out of your mouth in your concentration, and how just a few weeks ago, you were his new neighbour with a pretty apartment and an even prettier face.
‘Nice work, (Y/N) and Taehyung!’
The instructor is an old woman, with a tendency to compliment you and Taehyung everytime she walks past the two of you, which is every 5 minutes or so. Still, the two of you are grateful, smiling sweetly everytime she speaks to the two of you and watching the other couples glance over at the two of you in curiosity. You both take turns to thank her, and then turn back to each other.
‘Are you enjoying this?’
Taehyung places the tray into the oven as he speaks, and you wrinkle your nose at him, not wanting to say anything, knowing how much trouble he went to. He processes the look, and all of the words you want to say, before you can even think about lying, and smiles, putting the oven gloves down.
‘Me either. Wanna go get drunk?’
You laugh heartily, bringing you the attention of someone in front of you, who turns and gives you a goofy smile. Everyone was given a name tag on entering, and hers reads Mina. ‘Cute name,’ you think, before you turn back to Taehyung, who’s looking at his phone with a horrified expression. Almost falling for his dramatics, you ask what’s wrong, drawing the attention of the instructor, who also turns to him.
‘There’s been an emergency. Cali… died.’
Taehyung looks truly mortified, and for a split second you do, too, before you catch a glint in his eye that you wouldn’t have noticed if you hadn’t seen it before. It’s mischievous, and he had it in his eye last week, when the two of you baked cookies together and he placed a small squirt of whipped cream on the tip of your nose. You recognise it now as a part of him, a part that only seems to come alive around you, that makes you laugh in elation and scream in joy.
‘Who’s Cali?’ The instructor sounds genuinely concerned, and you almost feel bad for lying to her.
‘My cat. I knew she was sick but I…’
You break off with a fake sob, covering your face with both hands and taking deep breaths in and out. Through the gaps in your fingers, you see an astonished look on Taehyung’s face, before he regains composure and rushes to your side. 
‘You should go,’ The instructor's voice is uncertain, and she gives you a sympathetic smile before continuing, ‘I had a cat that… died, too. She was only a couple years old. I wasn’t even there when she…’ 
And now it’s her turn to sob. Taehyung’s head shoots in her direction, and you’re trying harder than you ever have before to hold back a laugh as she cries. You do feel bad, but this might be the funniest thing that’s happened to you in ages, so you relish in that light feeling. Looking over at Taehyung, you think that if you stay here any longer, you absolutely will burst out into hiccups of laughter, so you grab his hand and pull him out of the room before the instructor can process anything. 
With loud laughter, the two of you jog towards Taehyung’s car and away from that dreadful baking class. He opens the door for you again, before skipping over to his side and starting the car before you can say anything. As your laughter dies down, Taehyung turns on the radio, and you turn to him. 
‘Out of all of the things you could have said,’ you start, fighting back the urge to laugh again, ‘You chose to kill my cat?’
‘It was the first thing I thought of! How was I supposed to know she has a history with cat death?’ 
The laughter escapes you in giggles, and Taehyung gives you that gorgeous boxy smile that you love as he pulls up to a red light, and you decide to kiss him, even though he fake killed your cat and made a woman cry. Everyone has flaws, right?
This kiss is brief, and you pull away abruptly when an incessant beeping noise arises from behind you. Taehyung frowns, sticking his middle finger up out of the window and driving off.
‘You’re so cool, Taehyung.’
But not cool enough to avoid blushing, you realise, cooing at how pink his cheeks turn at your compliment. 
‘I get it from you.’ Is his selfless reply as he pulls up to a supermarket, parking effortlessly.
This man truly will be the death of you. 
 ‘So what do you drink, sugar?’ Taehyung asks, taking your hand and walking into the store. You grin, thinking back to your university days, when you took shots like they were lifelines and couldn’t have a single bit of fun without alcohol streaming through your system, making you feel alive, even if it was just for a night. You still are that girl sometimes, when the night is young and you don’t feel too old, when fun is the only thing on your mind and vodka the only thing in your hand. But today, you’d like Taehyung to choose. You want to know what kind of drunk he is, if he’s looking to get completely wasted or if he’s drinking for a slight buzz, one that won’t lower his inhibitions too much, just enough to say things he usually wouldn’t say and kiss you a bit harder than he usually would.
‘Anything. Everything. What do you drink?’
‘I’m a gin and lemonade kind of guy, personally.’
You briefly remember the first time you had gin and lemonade with a small grin. You were so young, and all you wanted was the life that you have now. It’s funny how life works, isn’t it?
‘Oooh, classy! I’m a massive fan of cabernet sauvignon, if we’re talking wine, but you can never go wrong with vodka, right?’
Taehyung agrees with a hum, his eyes landing on a rather big bottle of vodka. There it is again, you notice. That look in his eye, the mischievous one that tells you you’ll be in for a lot of fun tonight. 
 He gets you home in less than half an hour, waits as you grab a cardigan, and all but drags you back down the stairs and out of your apartment complex.
‘Where are we going?’ You ask, intrigued by the excitement buzzing off of Taehyung and onto you, laughing at how the wind feels against your face and the way he smiles back at you every few minutes. 
‘To the park. Specifically a hill in the park but yeah.’
‘And that’s got you so excited because…?’
Taehyung grins excitedly, teeth flashing, and kisses your nose softly. 
‘I just really like you.’
And God, how you like him, too.
 Autumn days aren’t nearly as long as you’d like them to be, but sitting at the top of this hill, watching Taehyung stand on top of a bench and letting the wind pass over and into him, time stretches across infinity. This day is neverending, you think, wincing slightly at how the vodka slinks down your throat and into your stomach. 
‘Come and drink some of this, it’s great!’
Taehyung smiles at the sarcasm in your voice, taking the bottle off of you and drinking. He swallows it like water, and you watch in anticipation, cheering ‘Go, go, go!’ As he drinks. Passing the bottle back to you, he takes a close seat next to you, throwing an arm over your shoulder and pulling you into him. You make a small, ‘hmph,’ noise at the change, but smile when he nuzzles into your neck, liking that he’s an affectionate drunk. 
Drinking is easy with Taehyung, you find, swigging the vodka like it’s orange juice and laughing uproariously at all of his jokes, even if they’re not funny. Most of them aren’t, and you both know that, but he refuses to stop telling them, liking the way you laugh too much.
‘Taehyung.’ You stop suddenly, looking away from him. His eyes follow your gaze until he lands on the bench he was just standing on, and he waits patiently for you to speak. At first, you don’t, studying your surroundings with an astute gaze. 
You give him your hand, and the two of you (with immense effort) stand up. Then you pull him up to stand on the bench, and the wind against your face up here is harsh, but you welcome it with a small smile. 
‘Now what?’
He watches you, a smile tracing the outline of his mouth as you stretch your arms upwards. 
‘Now scream.’
‘Scream.’ You say, with an impish smile and a magnetic energy. Taehyung’s eyes furrow at the sight of your fearlessness, and for a moment he envies you. For being so much like him, and for being so much more, too. 
‘And say what?’ 
Merely, you shrug, stepping down and letting Taehyung take his spotlight. He looks down at you with a hint of nervousness, and you smile assuringly, sticking up two thumbs messily in support. He grins, then, and you think he’s angelic, that you’re enamoured with the effortless, gorgeous ways he smiles, and all of the new ways you’ve found to make him smile in the past day. 
Taehyung closes his eyes, and you watch in anticipation, wondering what it is that he’ll confess to the world, and to you. 
You don’t entirely hear what leaves his mouth. He begins to shout, and it’s a bunch of words, and you think it might be a Gatsby quote, but you’re drunk and you’re laughing, so does it really matter? 
He gets down and his cheeks are flushed red and there’s a confident smile painted on his face. You match his expression as he talks;
‘That was exhilarating. Woah.’
‘What did you say up there?’ 
Taehyung giggles playfully, pushing you away slightly. 
‘I said ‘Carpe diem.’’ 
He looks awfully proud of himself, and you grin at how excitable he is. 
‘Your turn, sugar.’ 
Urging you up there, Taehyung gives you the same smile you gave him, and you search the air for something to say, something that you want both him and the world to hear. 
You settle on the opposite of Taehyung’s phrase — ‘Carpe noctem,’ you scream out, because why should you stop at seizing the day? Shouldn’t the night be seized, too? 
He whoops and he claps for you as you get down, and the two of you smile at each other. 
It’s heavenly, and you think that Taehyung’s sweet smile may just be the cause of your death. 
 The two of you sat down after that, slightly nauseous and just a tad bit tired, and you spoke for a while. You told Taehyung a bit more about yourself; you weren’t sure what to say, what would impress Taehyung in the way that you wanted to, but he found himself hanging onto every little thing you said. Whether it was ordinary or profound, he watched you with the most concentration and adoration that you’d ever received before, and you truly felt valued. And when was the last time you felt that way? 
As you sit next to him, on a softer patch of grass, your head spins at it all. Taehyung’s glued to your side, his hand linked through yours. He plays with your fingers mindlessly as you talk, and you giggle when he pulls you closer to him. Suddenly, you become aware of everything — of Taehyung, and the way he touches you ever so softly, of the world below you and how it seems to move underneath your body, of the way your head seems to spin with the unity of it all. 
‘Oooh, I know. Let’s dance!’
You attempt to pull Taehyung up by his hand, underestimating how heavy he is, how drunk you still are, and the strength that you lack. The world begins to spin faster underneath you, and you fall over before you can process anything else. Taehyung laughs, and you join him, sticking out a foot and tripping him up to get your revenge. On the ground, the two of you are entangled by bodies and souls, and blooming love becomes something easy under the setting sun, and everything is spinning, and you can’t think of anything else to do but dance.
So you take him by the hands, and the two of you struggle, but you stand up, and you sway in the hold of each other's arms, to the sound of the wind and your heartbeats and wherever that weird ringing in your left ear is coming from. 
‘Sing for me, Taehyung.’
It’s a whisper, a pleading one, but he hears it, and he obliges. Pretty girls like you make him weak at the knees; how could he say no?
He sings a Sade song, and the wind whistles in your ears, and you pull him down, closer to you, enveloping him in yourself and wrapping your cardigan around him as best you can. 
It’s freezing, but Taehyung feels warm, and of course it’s because of the alcohol, but it’s also because of what you’re doing for him. Making him happy. In a way he was sure he’d never feel again. He won’t say that to you, because he’s singing and he can feel your heartbeat against his and he’s sure the two of you are melting into each other, with the heat of love and alcohol. So he’ll kiss you, instead.
Drunk kisses are your favourite type of kiss. You’ve always thought that, but Taehyung takes you to a whole new level. He moves against you with a soft force, like a river, and his tongue is soft and malleable in your mouth and you have this absolutely insatiable need to pull him closer, but you’re frozen in place, unable to process anything but him, him, him. 
You wish he wouldn’t pull away, because in this moment you are sure that you’re at your happiest, but he moves slightly away, resting his forehead against yours and smiling ever so slightly at the irregularity of your breath and the way you open your mouth to speak, but find nothing to say. 
‘You know what would be fun?’ He says, pulling away from you and grabbing your hand. 
‘What?’ You muse, relishing in the way the setting sun drinks in his features and makes him something ethereal, something almost galactic in nature. Taehyung doesn’t belong on Earth, you think, looking at how softly beautiful he looks under the sky. He belongs in the stars, in the galaxy, because beauty like this can’t have been born from the soil of the earth. It’s otherworldly, and must have originated at the birth of a star, where cosmos reign freely and stardust peppers the sky effortlessly, angelically. Taehyung is at the centre of that all; where stars are born, where they live, where they shoot across the sky, he is there, serenading the moon with his honey-sweet voice and making the sun blush with his catastrophically beautiful smile.
‘If we raced down this hill.’
You look at him with an incredulous look in your eye, ready to disagree entirely. But the night is young and so are you, so what’s the use in saying no?
Agreeing is the easy part. A small, ‘okay,’ slips off of your tongue effortlessly, and before you know it, you’re finishing the alcohol and giving Taehyung a messy thumbs up, which he laughs at, before throwing the empty bottle away and looking straight ahead.
You look at the hill ahead of you, and the world morphs into a big, green blur.
When you look at Taehyung, though, you can still make out the edges of his face, and he’s still the prettiest man you have ever seen.
Now or never, right?
Right. You take off, letting the wind and your legs carry you faster than you’ve ever moved before, and Taehyung’s in front of you, but that’s okay, because this is fun, and you’re smiling, and adrenaline is rushing through you, and you’re truly happy. When was the last time you felt this way? The wind in your hair, slapping against your cheeks, your legs carrying you down a hill and straight into Taehyung’s arms. 
Of course he’d catch you. (You’d have fallen straight into a dustbin if he hadn’t.) You hug him, laughing and screaming about how much you love life in the safety of his arms. He lets you go a minute later, and the world is even blurrier than before, but he’s everywhere you turn and you think that you might throw up, because the alcohol sitting in your stomach is starting to disagree with you, and you’ve just run down an extremely steep hill.
You do, a minute later, and you don’t register anything but Taehyung pulling your hair into a makeshift ponytail, held together by his left hand, the other rubbing your back rhythmically. Letting it all out, you don’t feel better, but it helps that he’s here, and you want to say that, but the only thing leaving your mouth is vomit, and you can’t stand up to tell him how much it means that he’s here, so you store that thankfulness in the back of your mind, moaning and groaning about how horrid you feel. 
‘Let’s get you home, my love.’
Even in this, you are his love. How poetic.
 You don’t process much else aside from Taehyung, and he’s stood with you right now, outside of your door, fumbling around in your bag for your house keys. You’ve sobered up to the point where you aren’t throwing up, but your head is throbbing and you still can’t walk very well, so Taehyung took it upon himself to get you home safely. (Not like he wouldn’t have done the same if you were both sober.) You’re smiling tiredly at him, and even in this, with one eyelash hanging by a thread, and smudged lipstick, he thinks you’re the prettiest. You have this air about you, one that’s more intense when you’re drunk, and he hopes you keep him around for long enough so he can find out what it is. It tastes like freedom, sounds like the songs of Heaven, and looks like you under the moonlight, with a small smile and eyes full of something bright and burning, something he promised he would feel but not say. 
‘Ah!’ He exclaims triumphantly, ‘Got your keys, sugar.’
Your apartment door swings open, and you’re glad to be home, the warm air and vanilla smell hitting you like the wind did just 20 minutes ago, when you were running on the freedom of your feelings for Taehyung. 
He lets you go, and you make it into your room without too much trouble, but you urge him to follow you and he gives an uncomfortable smile, one that asks, ‘Are you sure?’
To be honest, you’re not sure, but you’re tired and you’d like some support, so you urge him all the same. Taehyung follows wordlessly, making sure to close his eyes as you undress.
‘I’m done. You can… open your eyes.’
You can’t really bring yourself to smile, but you try to give him a small one. He returns it, timidly, before getting up to excuse himself, and thank you for your company. 
‘I should go.’
‘Please don’t.’
Tonight, your need to be held is strong, and you’d forgotten how vulnerable you can sometimes be when you’re drunk, but you’re shameless in your needs, and you hope that he reciprocates them. 
He turns around with the speed of light, sending you a confused look. You don’t falter, taking a couple of messy steps closer to him. Taehyung meets you halfway, steadying you by reaching out for your arms. Instead of cooperating, you step into him, snaking your own arms around his waist, refusing to let go. 
‘Stay. Please.’
This is the smallest that Taehyung has ever seen or heard you, and a part of him is glad. Glad that he’s the only person that gets to see you like this, glad that he gets to take care of you, glad that you’re allowing yourself to be vulnerable. He remembers first meeting you, and you were open, sure, but this is so so different. 
‘Oh. Okay, sugar.’
You give him a tired smile, taking him by the hand and pulling him down and into your bed. He lets you, and it dawns on him that he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to say no to you.
In your bed, Taehyung is stiff next to you. You’re not sober enough yet to move freely, but you can get words out.
‘In my drawer. The lowest one. There’s some sweatpants. Take them.’
He’s sober (for the most part) but he cannot move. And yet he does. Simply because you asked him to. 
You open your eyes just enough to see the hazy outlines of his body as he gets dressed, and you smile at how clumsily he moves, even in the dead of the night, and you find that you absolutely adore Taehyung. 
When he gets back into your bed, and you push yourself (with immense effort) back into him, you find that you’ll never be close enough to him. But you’ve always been a tryer, so you take his arms and you wrap them around your waist. He seems to relax into your touch, his limbs stretching out comfortably, finally allowing him to make a home in your bed, even if it is just temporary. 
He holds you with the lightness of a man who hasn’t adjusted to the firmness of your body against his yet, and he seems nervous, but you’re too tired to think about it without doing anything, so you move, pushing him over and sprawling yourself out across his chest. Taehyung lets you, lying still so you can move and adjust him as much as you need to, because he’s here for you, and he wants to give you what you want. 
‘Thank you, Tae.’
Everytime you use his nickname he feels himself fall a little more, and tonight, wrapped up in the curves of your body, he plummets.
‘Of course, sugar.’
So that’s it, then. The night is over, and you’re in his arms. What more could you ask for?
 When you wake up, Taehyung is glued to your side, his arms wrapped close and tight around you, his head on your chest. You watch him for a moment, fingers aching to reach out and just touch him, to make him even more yours than he already is. He snores slightly, his chest heaving against your side; you like this. You like him pressed up against you and you like watching him sleep, smiling at the way his eyebrows are slightly furrowed and his mouth hangs open. 
You don’t mean to wake him, but you move slightly to make yourself comfortable and his eyes shoot open. For a second, he seems painfully unaware of his surroundings, eyes flitting around the room, filled with panic. When he lands on you, you feel him relax next to you, and you love that you’re his safe haven, that he feels okay with you, that he’s let his guard down. 
‘What happened?’ Taehyung asks, propping himself up on his elbows. Like this, he is truly a sight, eyes half open, morning voice, a contained smile on his face. You wonder if he looks like this every morning; but will you have to wonder much longer? He seems to be at peace with you, with the temporary home he’s created in your bed, and you think it won’t be long before you’re waking up to this everyday, whether it’s in your bed or his. And oh, how you’d love to sink into his sheets, to both cherish and ruin them, to take in Taehyung’s essence until you’ve had enough, until you take him back to your apartment and let him do the same to yours. That way, he will be with you, always. 
‘I asked you to sleep in my bed. We didn’t have sex, if that’s what you’re wondering.’
Taehyung feigns a look of disappointment, pouting and blowing hair out of his face. You watch him with a smirk; it’s always nice to be wanted. And especially by someone of Taehyung’s stature. God, how you’d love to kiss and lick and touch—
‘Well there’s always next time, isn’t there?’
He doesn’t let you get a reaction in; instead, he places a brief kiss on your lips, before jumping out of your bed and throwing his T-shirt on. You sit there, stunned, partly by his confidence and partly by the way his muscles flex as he pulls the shirt over his head. Enamoured, you make your way towards him, to kiss him and show him what he means to you. 
‘Ah, ah. Get in bed. I’m making you breakfast.’ 
(Seriously, where the fuck did you go so right to get a man this good?) 
‘But you’re my guest.’ 
‘And you, my dear, are hungover.’ Taehyung kisses your nose with a soft ‘mwah’ and walks you back over to the bed, where you let yourself feel all that the hangover has to give you. It’s not too bad, you think, remembering the first time you truly got drunk, where the hangover seemed to last days. Maybe it’s Taehyung that makes it easier. You entertain that thought for a moment, laughing to yourself softly as he starts to hum old Anita Baker songs as he makes you breakfast, feeling soothed by his mere presence in your apartment. With him, Taehyung brings a calming aura, one that makes you smile and feels a lot like lying on a freezing cold pillow in hot weather. (You’re too tired to come up with a better simile.)
‘Hey, sugar. Where do you keep your… actually, I’ll find it.’ Taehyung asks, sliding into your room on his heels. You giggle at how he looks like a child in the wide adult world of your bedroom, and you find yourself growing closer to the energy he gives out, finding that it’s not only calming but it’s exciting. You truly cannot keep up with Taehyung, no matter how hard you try. He flits through life, like a shooting star, leaving you to wonder if he’s real, or a dream. Actually, you find yourself wondering that quite a lot these days; is Taehyung real? Sure, you’ve held him, but have you really held him? Have you felt what makes him tick, what makes him melt, what makes him fall apart? You don’t think that you have. And still, you find yourself drawn to him. In the same way bees are drawn to pollen, you are drawn to Taehyung. He is your flower. 
His voice reverberates all around your apartment, and he becomes inescapable in between the four walls. Not that you mind; If you weren’t suffering from an intense headache right now, you’d like to dance to Taehyung’s voice, his voice planting loving emotions into the very depth of your soul. And you’d like to kiss him. To press your lips on top of his and show him just how much he means to you, because how else can you show him? He’s beat you to all of it; cuddling you, making you breakfast, complimenting you. Everyday he shows you how much he truly adores you. Now you have to figure out how to do the same. 
 ‘My God, Taehyung. This is amazing.’
You hum through bites, smiling with a mouth full of food. He grins at you, watching you eat with eyes full of happiness. He’s always loved cooking for people; baking, not so much, but cooking he absolutely loves. And to share this with you, he finds himself happier than usual. 
Autumn isn’t usually sunny like this, but today the sun filters through your curtains beautifully, shining down on Taehyung and on you. You look at him through squinted eyes and a wrinkled nose, and he giggles at how adorable you look, taking the fork from your hand.
‘Hey!’ You swat Taehyung, chasing after the fork angrily. He merely laughs, pulling his hand further away from you. 
‘It’s almost done. Let me feed you the rest.’
You stop in your movements, eyebrows furrowed and mouth slightly parted. Taehyung sends you a look, one with a small plea in his eyes that currently replaces his usual excitable look. Maybe, just maybe, this is the first time you’ve seen Taehyung this calm. Usually, he is excitable, usually he takes what he wants and he runs with it. But today, he asks for permission, and how could you say no? 
With a smile, you nod softly, sitting back with a relieved sigh. Taehyung scoots up, crossing his legs like a child and giving you a boxy smile that has never failed to make you grin. 
He feeds you slowly, and talks to you as you chew, not expecting you to say much, but knowing you’re listening by the various expressions that you give him; you smile, furrow your eyebrows, giggle as best you can with mouthfuls of food, and Taehyung gives you a smile that reaches his eyes. You blush, and he catches it, smirking to himself as he goes to put your plate in the sink. 
You want to tell him not to wash the dishes, you really do, but you both know that he’ll end up doing them anyway. Still, you make sure to promise yourself that you’ll return the favour one day.
In your kitchen, Taehyung is humming along to Lana Del Rey, and you wrap your arms around him from behind, overcome with emotion and with a need to hold him. Again, you have to remind yourself that Taehyung is real. That he’s yours. That you’re his. It’s all so dizzying under the hot sun and the translucent clouds, you think, hugging Taehyung tight and laughing when he chokes slightly.
‘What’s this for, sugar?’
He quite literally pries you off of him, turning around to hug you again. His arms around you are soft, firm, strong, and you feel truly safe on this completely mundane morning; actually, you want to laugh. Already, your life is changing before you, and you are taking those changes and you’re running with them, welcoming them, kissing them like you’ve never kissed anyone before, and you’re safe. Here, and everywhere Taehyung is, you are truly safe. It’s taken you ages to get here, but now that you are, you’re not going anywhere. 
‘I just really like you. You’re so cool.’ 
You’ve actually always been good at conveying your feelings through words. But today, with Taehyung, you’re at a true loss for words. How do you tell him that he’s lit up your life, that before him, you weren’t unhappy, but you were waiting for something, holding in a breath that you didn’t think you’d ever get to release, looking everyday for what currently stands in front of you; Taehyung, this apartment, your new life. 
‘I like you, too. A lot.’
‘I know. Since when do men make their dates breakfast after a nasty hangover? I’m so lucky.’ You muse, tiptoeing up to press a brief kiss to Taehyung’s lips. He deepens it immediately, pulling you up further by the curves in your waist and smiling into the softness of your mouth against his. He’s had his fair share of moments with you that he’d love to stay in forever — Reading to you in Lia’s bookstore, your first kiss, catching you last night before you fell — but he really wants this to last forever. At that, he smiles softly, knowing that you like him just as much as he likes you, that he doesn’t have to worry about you leaving. When his grip on you loosens, yours on him tightens, and adoration becomes something transactional, something to give and receive, to take and send out.
‘You are lucky. But that ends here, sugar. I’ve gotta go shower, I feel wretched.’
You grimace up at him, understanding completely, but still not wanting him to go. Giving him a last soft kiss, you decide to do the same, not liking the way you’re starting to feel either. 
‘Come back after?’ You ask, doe eyed and smiley. Taehyung caresses your face, softly, mumbling a small, ‘of course,’ before giving you one last kiss and shuffling off to his apartment. 
 He’s back in less than an hour. When he knocks on your door, you’re wrapped in a towel, ready to moisturise and really feel good. And when you open it, Taehyung’s eyes widen. You grin, swatting him slightly with a reprimanding look.
Stepping into your apartment, Taehyung thinks he’s never spoken before, that he couldn’t form a single word even if he tried. You’ve never seen him speechless, and you think it’s a good sign. 
He decides to wait in your front room, letting his mind run wild with the thoughts of just how badly he wants you, and even more about just how much he likes you. He’s never been a ‘looks don’t matter’ kind of guy, because Lord knows that they do, but he genuinely does adore your personality, too. All of your little quirks, like when you play with your hair when you talk to people, and when you smile before you compliment him, and the exact way your hands rake through his hair when you kiss him. He finds them all adorable; you being super hot is just a major plus at this point. 
You walk into the front room about 5 minutes later, laughing softly at how Taehyung sits timidly at the end of your sofa. 
‘Make yourself comfortable, Tae. My sofa won’t bite you.’
He chuckles awkwardly, sitting further back and watching as you jump over to join him. You press yourself into his side, and immediately, a small warmth radiates off of you and onto him. You have this tendency to brighten things, Taehyung is realising, and you are what the sun tries so hard to be, and you are better, he thinks, smiling at how your fingers draw meaningless patterns on the palm of his hand.
‘I didn’t even ask before I came over here, I’m sorry. Are you busy today?’
‘Course not, why?’
Taehyung takes a deep breath, looking down at his hands, then up at you, swearing you’re the most beautiful, angelic woman that he’s ever set eyes on, wondering where he went so right to have you as a neighbour, a friend, and more. His eyes land on your lips for just a moment, and yours on his, and you hope that he doesn’t leave anytime soon, and you hope that he’ll kiss you. Lips shouldn’t do much else, and because you don’t truly form a judgement on things until you do them many times. (Taehyung’s an exception, but you push that thought away, wanting to kiss him again.)
‘Wanna hang out?’
In what world would you ever say no?
 ‘Sugar, those movies are amazing. How haven’t you seen them?’ 
The general gist of the conversation has been like this for the past 30 minutes. You let it slip, as you brought out your nail polish set, that you’d never seen a single Marvel movie, and Taehyung flipped. You find it adorable how much he seems to like them, so you will watch a couple, but not without him, and not without making fun of him a little bit first. 
‘I think they’re lame. Just a bunch of men flying around fighting… aliens?’
You know it’s more than that, but you love seeing Taehyung pull a face at you, and you love hearing how passionate his voice gets as he talks about them. 
‘Woah. They’re way more than that. They’re like… super cool.’
‘Hmmmm, that’s convincing,’ You smile, opening your nail polish set and browsing the colours. 
You settle on a blue, a sea blue, that reminds you of the picture Taehyung has on his lockscreen of him and a friend. 
‘Is this colour okay?’ 
Holding it up for him to see, you study the way Taehyung’s fingers tremble as he takes the small bottle from you. It’s adorable.
‘Yep, it’s good. We should watch a Marvel movie together one day.’
You hum in response, starting with his left hand, pulling it forward to rest on your knee. Casual exchanges of touch are your favourite, you think. You like having him like this, with a hand on your knee and his other knee touching your other knee. It’s simple, but it isn’t, and yet it still makes sense.
‘Who’s your favourite superhero?’
Taehyung lights up at your question, and answers, ‘Spiderman!’ With the excitement of a 6 year old boy. It makes you laugh slightly, which earns you a frown, but you can’t hold it in. Soon, Taehyung begins to laugh, too, and the two of you fill your empty apartment with the sound. 
‘Oh, fuck, careful.’
You grab a cotton swab and wipe away the excess nail polish from his fingers, then bring them up to your lips. He tenses up slightly as you blow softly on them. It never speeds up the drying process, but today you felt the need to do it, and you know that Taehyung likes the feeling, because he watches you in something dangerously close to a word you still refuse to say. Instead, you settle for adoration. Adoration is what settles in Taehyung’s eyes as he watches you blow his nails dry with a concentration that he thinks is intense for such a tedious job. 
‘Look!’ You beam, letting his hands go with a satisfied grin at the way his nails turned out. They are pretty, he thinks, but they resulted in something a lot prettier — your smile. Oh, what he wouldn’t give to see you smile like that constantly. 
‘Wow, thanks, sugar. I love them.’
This earns another grin from you, and he grins back. The two of you stay like that for a moment, almost wondering who’ll lean in first, who’ll make the first move.
It’s him this time. 
Taehyung leans in, and you mirror his movements. His lips against yours are soft against the harsh blow of the wind on your back, and you’d make a mental note to close the door, but you can’t focus on anything else but the movement of Taehyung against you, and how he feels like everything you were missing in past lovers, and how he gives himself to you tenderly, asking for nothing in return except you. And you give yourself willingly, allowing yourself to melt into his touch with no hesitation, with no thought, because you know that he’ll take care of you, that you’ll be okay with him.
‘You’re a really fucking good kisser, you know that, sugar?’
His compliment sends a blush rushing into you, and you press another soft kiss to his lips in response.
‘Mmm, you’re a great kisser, too, Taehyung.’
‘You can call me Tae, you know.’
He pulls you into him with an unbridled display of confidence, one that you return by nuzzling into him, wrapping both arms around his torso, giving him yourself, as if to say, ‘Wherever you go, I will, too.’
‘I know, Tae. I just like the name Taehyung. It suits you.’
‘It does? How?’ He questions, resting his head on top of yours.
‘I don’t know, it just does. You know?’
‘Sort of. Like how sugar suits you.’
‘Exactly like that.’
He’s sure it does, grinning at how you seem to have accepted it as your nickname as quickly as he accepted that you probably won’t ever use his. That’s okay, though. Opposites attract, right?
 By the end of the day, you and Taehyung make it through half of a Marvel movie. To be honest, you’re not quite sure which one it is, but you know that there was a flying man in it, and you thought you saw Spiderman, but Taehyung looked so invested that you didn’t ask, enjoying his reactions to the movie more than the movie itself. He caught you staring about 10 minutes later with a smirk, and kissed your cheek before turning back to the movie. 
Affectionate isn’t even the word, you quickly realised with him. After he turned off the movie, claiming to be bored, (You knew he wasn’t, that he wanted to spend time with you more, but you didn’t say anything.) his hands did not leave you. He was always touching you in some way, whether it was with his hands on your waist, his head resting on yours or in the crook of your shoulder, or even just a hand on your thigh. You liked that a lot, craving his touch in the crooks of your body, finding small Heavens in the way he traced patterns on your arm, patterns that felt a lot like his favourite Jackson Pollock painting, one that he told you he’s forgotten the name of, but he’d know it from a mile away. You feel similarly for him; you’d never forget his name, it holds the entire essence of who he is, but you’d know him a mile away.
He spent a lot of the time touching you, and when he wasn’t, he was staring at you, committing you to memory, speaking to you, asking questions you had to really think of answers to. 
And after that, he started touching you again. They were innocent, caring, and they grew from little caresses to a kiss. And another. And a couple more after that. You couldn’t allow him to sit there without kissing him, without pressing your lips to his and reminding yourself that he was real, that he liked you, and that life was amazing inside your mind and outside of it.
‘You smoke?’
He asked at one point. You do, so you said that, and his smile was wide, and you thought he’d crack at the seams, and you promised yourself there and then that you’d glue him back together.
So right now, you’re sat on your balcony with Taehyung, taking hits of a joint that you’d never rolled this good until now.
‘Life is great, isn’t it?’ Taehyung hums, blowing smoke upwards in an insanely attractive way. You’ve not had enough of kissing him, you decide, and you don’t think you ever will, because you lean over now to give him another one, and his lips are soft and plush and everything you’ve been looking for. 
‘It really is. Never thought I’d be smoking a joint with such a gorgeous boy at 9pm on a Thursday evening.’
‘And I never thought I’d be smoking with a gorgeous girl who can also roll joints perfectly.’
You shrug off the compliment with a small grin, remembering who you were when you learnt to roll joints, and hoping that one day you’ll tell Taehyung about her. You know that he’ll adore her, too, because she’s you, but it’s still scary. Opening up is a sort of undressing, you think, one that is much more embarrassing and terrifying than physically undressing, because you can’t help the way that you look, but you think that you can help the way that you are, and so everything becomes much more regarded, much more intensely inspected, because if we judge looks we’re shallow but if we judge character we’re critical thinkers. 
You don’t realise you’re telling Taehyung this until he replies.
‘That’s bullshit.’
You look at him in confusion, ashing the joint.
‘I mean, it’s true, but it’s bullshit. I don’t think any judgements we make of other people can be called ‘critical thinking.’ There’s nothing critical about the way we judge people. We just do it.’
In response, you hum, mulling over his words. If you leave him at a loss for words, he does the same to you, and you like that you’re both mirrors of each other, with different niches that make you both yourselves, but a little bit of each other, too. 
‘Yeah. We do. Would you consider yourself a judgemental person?’
‘Absolutely. Would you?’
You think for a moment, back to relationships you ended for petty reasons, back to men who left you for even pettier reasons, to women you were once jealous of, to women you see on the street who you think you could be friends with, and you realise that all of this belongs to the word judgement. 
‘Yeah. Everyone is.’
‘Agreed. You can say that you aren’t, but everyone has their own ways of living, their own rules that they impose on others, even subconsciously. Even good judgements are still judgements. I find questions like these pointless, you know, sugar?’
You look at Taehyung, confused, pulling the joint away from your mouth and passing it to him. 
‘So why do you let me ask you them?’
‘You have a way of making things seem lovely. Even if they aren’t.’
He doesn’t say anything else, taking a pull of the joint with a hazy smile and taking your hand in his. You grin over at him when he gives it back, but before you can take it, he moves in front of you with an excitable smirk. How he never runs out of new, fun things to do is truly beyond you. Before Taehyung, your idea of fun was curling up with a book and your cat, reading until you forgot which world you were in. And now, with him, it’s drinking, it’s kissing, it’s being read to. It’s not like life wasn’t fun before, but Taehyung makes it electric. 
‘You know what would be fun?’ 
‘What?’ You ask, wondering slightly where he gets these ideas from, what his thought process is. 
‘Lemme spotlight it.’ 
Before you can say anything, Taehyung is taking a hit of the joint, and he’s gesturing for you to lean forward. You do, and he blows the smoke into your mouth. The last time you did this, you were 18, and all you were looking for was this life. Now, you’ve got it, and you want to make sure it doesn’t go anywhere. You grab Taehyung by the cheeks, pulling him into you, swallowing the smoke, and going for another kiss. He responds immediately, his lips spreading into a satisfied smile and searching for your hips with his hands. You try, and fail, to move closer to him without standing. He laughs into you, pulling away slightly to catch his breath. Up close, he is angelic, and you can’t find the word you’re thinking of to describe him, but it’s a beautiful one, and you search for it in his eyes, that sparkle despite their redness. You may lose sight of everything else at the sight of him, but that is a risk worth taking, you think, watching how he watches you, how he takes your hips in his hands and makes you his, walking you over to him. Taehyung swings your legs over his, and pulls you down into another kiss, which you happily oblige. 
It’s a bit more heated this time, Taehyung biting at your bottom lip softly, enjoying the way you moan slightly into him maybe a bit too much. You, on the other hand, are trying your absolute best to keep up with his speed, to get him going and to make him want — make him need you. He seems to, the way he pulls you against him desperate and insatiable, kissing you hard and fast and God, you’re willing to give it all up on your balcony because he’s taking away your ability to think. Every thought rushing through you right now is him, his hands, his lips, his tongue, him. It’s all him.
‘Fuck, I fucking…’ He pulls away, chest heaving and breath irregular, smiling hazily at you. You push a couple of stray hairs out of his face, laughing with whatever breath you can muster up. He looks torn apart, and you take a mental picture of how he looks beneath you, letting your mind travel briefly to how he’d look if you love him even further, wanting nothing more than him in all of his entirety. He seems to hear these thoughts, because he smirks and he looks up at you and he says, ‘I want you’ in the smallest voice you’ve heard from him yet, and God, does he have to be so perfect? He’s loud until he wants you. Then he’s quiet and he’s pleading and he’s not intrusive, he hasn’t even asked yet, and you think that this side of Taehyung is one that you absolutely adore, because what other man could turn down his personality to fully appreciate yours? 
‘I want you, too.’ 
You’ve never been one to hide behind euphemism. What’s the point, if you can get what you want by merely asking? 
Taehyung smirks as you stand up, and he buckles as he stands up, and life is hot and heavy and wonderful right now, and you think that this will be a night to remember.
 It really was. 
You’re not usually the type of girl to kiss and tell, but this morning you’d like to rush to your balcony with a megaphone, and scream compliments and profanities about your new love. 
Instead, you’re wrapped up in the mess of his limbs and his snores and his love and there’s nowhere you’d rather be. Where else would be better than this? You let your eyes flutter shut again, slowly processing all that God has given you in the form of Taehyung, in his strong arms, his unsurprisingly talented mouth and the entirety of his being. First times are usually horrifying for you, no matter what they are, (Your first kiss was drunk in a park with a man you’ve long forgotten the name of) but things with Taehyung were different. He was soft, caring, loving, and he made you feel beautiful the entire time — even when your bones cracked when he pushed your legs in a weird angle, and the two of you laughed so hard you both had to take a breather. 
You think you could live in that memory forever; you could stay, locked in the 4 walls of your mind, reliving that night over and over. You’d never get sick of it, or of him. 
As you think that, he begins to wake up, safe and content with you wrapped in his arms. A month ago, if anyone had told him that he’d be here, with a girl as alive and as reckless as him, he’d laugh them off, claiming to be happy as he was. And he was, but he’s ecstatic with you. 
‘Morning, baby.’ His voice is deep, unfiltered, his hair sticks up in every direction, and he smiles with a lazy pull of his face. You turn your head towards him, pressing a soft, tender kiss onto his lips. You don’t think you’ll ever tire of this sight, of him in his rawest form. Thinking back to a couple months ago, to your first date, did you ever think you’d be here? Ever? Truthfully, you did. You saw something in his eyes then, something that neither of you would say, but something you saw all the same; it was the two of you, where you are now. You wonder how he knew, how you both knew. 
‘Morning, sugar.’ 
Maybe he’d seen it all in your eyes, in the way you opened up to him and the way you bloomed for him. Maybe he’d seen the love you were willing to give him. Could he have seen it? You think so, because who else would help their neighbour bake after meeting them once? You’ve never been an exactly subtle person, but it’s working out in your favour, so how can you scold yourself for doing what you felt was right to find Taehyung? 
‘Plans for today?’ You ask, taking his hands in yours and playing with them. His chest heaves slightly, and you think that he might be asleep again, but he speaks up a moment later;
‘None. You know what would be fun?’
You laugh, at how many times he’s said this to you in the past 3 days and at how he seems to just know that you’re going to follow him in everything he asks you to do. With a hum in response, you sit up groggily, rubbing your eyes and pulling the mess Taehyung made of your hair into a loose ponytail. 
‘If we made pancakes together!’ 
His voice holds the excitable nature of a child, and you imagine the mess the two of you are going to make if you say yes to him. You will, because it’s Taehyung, and you’d never say no to him. Plus, pancakes are delicious, and you’ve never made them from scratch before. 
‘Sure. What are we gonna need?’ 
Taehyung pulls his phone from under his side of your pillow, your heart swells with warmth, and he scrolls through it. You stand up to get dressed, and hear his phone click off. 
Hands snake around your bare waist, and you jolt at the cold feeling. The grin in Taehyung’s voice is evident when he says, ‘Come back here,’ and you turn to face him. And there it is; that grin, the one that looks like a smirk if you stare too long; currently, you do, studying the lust dancing in his eyes and the way his chest heaves and the way he regards you, as something alive and something he wants so deeply that it’s dizzying, because his eyes move from your head to your toe in an instant. Being with Taehyung wasn’t your first time and it certainly won’t be your last, but maybe this is the first one that matters because as much lust as there is in his eyes, there’s also adoration, devotion, care, and does he have to look at you like that? Because you think you’ll melt at the intensity of it, and what good will you be to him then? 
You no longer fight smiles around Taehyung; you let them bloom. Today is no different, as he scoops you back up into his arms, and tenderly caresses your cheek with a look that sends you reeling. 
‘What about the pancakes?’
You whisper this, not wanting him to stop but still, doing anything so that he’ll stop looking at you like that. It’s exposing, and you have been wanted by men before, and the look in their eyes has been similar, but there’s an air of respect that Taehyung gives you, like he is always and forever letting you know that you do not truly belong to him, that you are yours before you’re his, because as much as he wants to have you, he understands that you are wholly your own person, with or without him. From this look, though, it’s easy for you to decide that you do want to be with him, as much as you can for as long as you can. 
‘What about the pancakes?’ 
He whispers back, knowing the effect he has on you from the way you cannot bring yourself to speak but also not wanting to startle you. He wants you to know just how safe you are in the space of his arms, and he wants you to know that, no matter what, he’s got you. 
Taehyung begins kissing you soft on the lips, and it’s dizzying and it’s wonderful and it’s angelic. Between kisses, he tells you that you’ll make the pancakes later, that right now all he wants is you, and a couple of other things that light your cheeks up in brightness and sunshine and starlight and Taehyung can’t find more words, because he’s losing himself in the curves of your body and finding himself all over again at the look in your eyes. What the fuck is it about you that’s got him hooked like this? He thinks if he touches you a couple more times, he may find out. 
 An hour later, he still hasn’t. You’re in his arms, scrolling through instagram and laughing at stupid videos that he doesn’t find funny at all, but has grown to love because of how much they make you laugh. His chin is rested on your head, your back is against his chest, and he’s intertwined with you, and he still doesn’t know what it is about you that he’s so deathly attracted to, that he’s grown to be absolutely obsessed with. 
‘Come on,’ you wake him from his thoughts, jumping up and slipping into a Victoria’s secret robe he told you he liked the colour of a few weeks ago. He watches you move about your apartment, floating about like a garden fairy, and when you turn to check why he’s not out yet, and you poke your head through your bedroom door with a bright smile, he realises that that’s it. Your smile. That’s what drives him crazy. Of course that’s basic, and it’s cliché, and there are a multitude of things that drive him crazy about you, but right now, in this moment, it’s your smile, the way it’s confident and it’s messy and it shows your teeth and the way it reaches your eyes and the way you move and God, he loves your smile and he might just love you. 
Wow. Taehyung loves you. And it’s not a fully fledged love, it’s a small, pretty thing, but it’s still love and it’s still for you. He knows that soon, he’ll be in love with you, that he’s still falling, but there’s a snippet of love that he feels now, as you smile at him, and that’s a gorgeous feeling. So he stands up, pulls a pair of boxers on, and rushes towards you with outstretched arms and pouted lips. You giggle, letting him pick you up and kiss your neck because you deserve him and you deserve this. 
‘Let’s cook some pancakes, my love.’ 
You let him stay latched onto you as you walk into the kitchen, and as you grab all of the ingredients that this cooking website says you’ll need. 
‘You don’t cook pancakes, sugar.’ 
‘You absolutely do.’ You retort, turning around with a playful glare at Taehyung, who snorts in disagreement. 
‘You bake them.’ 
‘No you do not. You cook them. In a frying pan.’ 
With a small gesture at your frying pan, you render Taehyung speechless. 
‘I hate you.’ He grumbles, and you laugh in triumph, pulling open a drawer to find utensils.
‘Do you, though?’ 
No, he really doesn’t.
 You have known Kim Taehyung for 2 months now, and you’ve never seen him this committed to anything. Except last night, when he—
‘Hey, (Y/N), watch this.’ 
He flips the pancakes in the pan, and they land perfectly. You whoop and clap, genuinely amazed at how quickly he seemed to get the hang of this. In fact, in the time you’ve known him, you’ve realised that he just seems to have the ability to do things. Like 3 weeks ago on facetime, when he showed you a canvas he’d painted just before he met you, of a field. It was pretty fucking good for a first time artist, you thought, marvelling at the colours and the blending and how proud he seemed to be. 
‘You’re so fucking cool, Kim Taehyung.’ 
You press a soft kiss to his lips, before flopping over your sofa and lying down, staring at the ceiling. You had meant to help him, but you’re terrible at flipping the pancakes and you did a lot of the preparation. 
So here you are, staring at your ceiling as Roberta Flack plays softly from your speaker, and Taehyung hums along. This type of Heaven is truly unmatched, you think, smiling at how well he harmonises with the song. If he’s perfect, you must be, too, because the way he’s been looking at you recently is the same way you look at him, and it makes you feel wanted and loved and valued and you truly cannot get enough of it. 
‘They’re done, sugar. Want me to bring them to you?’ 
You refuse politely, getting up and helping him dish them out. Neither of you say anything, but you share the occasional smile or grin whenever you look up to see Taehyung already staring at you. It’s intimate, and it makes your head spin. 
‘Lemme feed you today, babe.’ You say, shyly, knowing in the back of your mind that he’ll say yes, that he’d never say no to you, but still, feeling timid and small. 
Instead of replying, Taehyung makes an ‘ahhhh’ noise with his mouth wide open, that makes you snort with laughter. There’s a prideful look in his eye that you don’t miss, and it’s pure and it’s loving and you really do think that one day you’ll burst from the feelings you’ve got for him. 
He lets you feed him without saying much else, and he giggles when you accidentally flick whipped cream onto the tip of his nose. Sticking his tongue out, he tries to lick it off, and you laugh, and life is perfect in this small infinity, and you never want this to end. 
‘Why are you looking at me like that, sugar?’ 
‘Nothing, I just…’ You trail off, wondering how exactly to tell him that every look in his direction makes your heart burst into tiny little pieces and every conversation with him builds all of those tiny pieces back up in a different formation.
‘I really really really like you. I’m glad we met.’
This honesty is new for you, but Taehyung welcomes it, and that makes you squeal with happiness, because you’ve never been in a relationship this healthy before. If you were 19, you’d have said, ‘Who the fuck says what they feel?’ But you’re not 19 anymore, so all you say is what you feel. And so does Taehyung;
‘I really really really like you, too, (Y/N).’
It’s that easy, you think, giggling girlishly at his small confession, wondering if this high will ever end.
 It’s 6pm, and you’ve spent most of the day with Taehyung; he took you to an art gallery, claiming, as you stood in front of one of the prettiest paintings that you’d ever seen, that you were the ‘real art.’ At that, you pushed him away jokingly, laughing at how cliche he was. (You enjoyed it, but he didn’t need to know that.) 
The two of you walked around, hand in hand, talking about art and what it meant to the two of you. You said that art is ‘Something to enjoy the look of,’ not really delving too much into the meaning, because, ‘Some things are just pretty without substance, and I like that.’ For Taehyung, you found out that it absolutely is something to delve into, to ‘Study and analyse and regard in the hopes of discovering the artists’ true intentions.’ 
After he told you that, you asked him to tell you what he saw in front of the painting before you both. 
‘Have you never seen it before?’ He asked you, genuine interest displayed in his eyes. (And maybe a bit of concern, because who hasn’t seen ‘The Birth of Venus’?!)
You shook your head, wondering if you should have seen it before, if it was a painting everyone knew. (Apparently it was. Taehyung told you its name, and then he told you that it was incredibly famous.)
He watched it for a moment, then, looking back at you, he smiled. You waited for him to say something, for him to give this painting a meaning for you, so everytime you looked at it in the small box of your phone, you’d think of him.
Then he started speaking, and you thought the entire gallery hushed to listen to him, ears and hearts open to receive the sacrament that he was preparing for you. 
‘It reminds me of us.’ 
You nodded, a small smile beginning to trace the outline of your lips, unable to even begin to ask why he thought that, because you knew he’d tell you why this magnificent painting of a goddess reminded him of the two of you. 
And that he did;
‘You see that big, gorgeous lady right in the middle? That’s you. Gorgeous and eye-catching and breathtaking, and God, just the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.’
He wouldn’t let you get a word in, so enamoured by everything that the artist put in the painting that he kept talking. And you listened, because you’d been stunned to silence ever since he began speaking. 
‘... and you see those creatures surrounding Venus? Those are me.’
You did see them, and maybe in the same way that he did, because they were absolutely obsessed with the large depiction of Venus in the middle. And they orbited around her, like she was their sole purpose for living, like they’d been waiting their entire lives to see someone as magnificent as her. It dawned on you, in that moment, that Taehyung looked at you in the same way. And it suddenly clicked into place. You really were Venus. You didn’t doubt Taehyung’s claims that you were her, but staring at that painting, you began to truly see yourself in the same way he saw you. And, God, how pretty she was. (As he watched you watch the painting, he was suddenly made aware of the phrase, ‘The eyes, chico, they never lie.’ from Scarface, in the same way you were on your first date — it’s really majestic how life seems to work, isn’t it?)
‘Wow, Taehyung, I… I don’t really know what to say.’
He just smiled, taking your hand in his and squeezing it slightly.
‘Let the art do the talking.’
So you did. And so did he. The two of you stood there for what felt like forever, watching the painting, letting it liquidate before you and seep into your bones, sitting just under the skin and mixing with your bloodstream. 
Before you left, you stopped an older couple, and asked them to take a picture of the two of you in front of it. Taehyung blushed awfully, but they gave you warm smiles and did as you asked. You didn’t tell him, but as you looked at them, old and happy, you saw you and Taehyung. You saw the two of you, looking back on your younger years and smiling at how happy you were, you saw yourselves dancing to Maxwell and Sade despite your hearing aids, and you saw forever in him. And in that, there was bliss, and there was your old friend Juyeon, from college, who told you that he had a ‘forever’ thing, and that being with her split his heart in two and put it back together in less than a minute, and you remember longing for that. 
When the couple finished taking your picture, and showed you, you felt that coming from Taehyung, as he smiled and kissed the side of your head. You felt forever.
So you took him to a coat closet, stood against the door so you’d feel it if someone suddenly burst in, and kissed him.
As you kissed him, with his hands hot on your waist and his lips leaving imprints on your soul, you realised that you were living on finite, stolen time, and that somehow, someway, you had to make Taehyung immortal, because one day neither of you would be here anymore. And what’s the use in a moment like this if you can’t find a way to encapsulate it?
And in that moment, although you felt that you’d be with him forever, you felt time running out, and the bittersweet moment of life that you’d always been searching for, the moment where you realise that things are truly perfect, although time is escaping you. What’s time to life’s small perfections, anyway?
 Now, as you step into your apartment, and as Taehyung whines jokingly at always being at yours, and never his, things are still perfect. You never thought moments of joy could last like this. You’d always felt them fade, felt them wither between your fingers. Never did you ever think that perfection could last this long. 
He’s kissing you, and he tastes like smooth, silky red wine, and he tastes like everything you thought you’d never be able to hold; he’s solid between your fingers, and as you kiss him you pull him closer, eager to keep him with you for as long as possible. 
Everytime you kiss him feels like the first time, where you knew you liked him but you didn’t know you’d like him this much, and you’re elated to be able to have him like this, in the small universe of your hallway, because now you know the extent of your feelings for him, and you can really smother him in it. You can touch on him, caress him, kiss him, hug him, do everything that you couldn’t before, because he’s yours. 
 ‘We kiss a lot.’
You say mindlessly, picking a book from your bookshelf to read to Taehyung. 
Feeling arms snake around your middle, you feel his lips hot on your neck as he presses sultry kisses all over you, the ghost of a smile evident. 
‘Hmmmm. I like kissing you.’
Taehyung flips you around with a firm hand on your hips, and you’re sure you’d melt if he wasn’t holding you in place. 
‘Do you like kissing me, baby?’
You feel the air stifle around you, and you want to laugh, but no sound leaves your lips. Instead, they slightly part. Taehyung sees his opportunity, and rushes forward, catching your bottom lip in between both of his. Smiling into him, you card your hands through his hair, feeling him shudder just the way you like. As your hands travel lower, to his hips, Taehyung gets needier. He moans into you, and it’s quiet, but you hear it, and you smirk, swearing to yourself that you know what he’ll say after this entire ordeal is over. When your hands hook into the waistband of his jeans, he groans, and it’s loud, and God, isn’t he just the prettiest? All of this for you. 
You pull away slightly, smiling at how heavily he breathes and how intensely he regards you. 
‘Hmmmmm, no.’
Before he can reply, or kiss you again, you duck under him with a book in between your fingers. 
He moves to grab you, but you’re far from his reach, running into your front room with the speed of a cheetah. But of course, he’s faster than you; he leaps onto you, pushing you down onto your sofa headfirst. You’re greeted by your cushion, and poor Cali’s tail, who yelps and leaps away from you. Taehyung laughs boisterously, and you join from where he’s got you trapped underneath him. 
Looking into his eyes is like looking at the galaxy. He’s sewn together by constellations, you think, because in the crooks of his body you find stardust, and in his eyes you find the entire galaxy; it’s purple, it’s deep blue, it’s silver, and it’s all of the colours you felt when you first began kissing him, the ones you couldn’t name until now. 
If the eyes are the windows to the soul, Taehyung’s soul holds the very essence of starshine. 
He presses a soft kiss to your lips, and it’s loving, and your head spins at the feeling of it. 
‘Read to me, baby. Wanna listen to your voice.’ is what leaves his mouth between these kisses, and you promise to oblige him, kissing his nose with a loving smile.
 An hour later, between your legs, Taehyung clutches onto you, his cheek squished up against your forearm. You’ve been reading nonstop, genuinely thinking that he’s awake. When you stop at the end of a chapter, you pause to check in with him, to talk about the book.
‘Taehyung?’ You ask, having not heard an answer from him. 
Staying silent for a moment, you finally hear the snores he’s been emitting, and you smile, stroking his head softly. Truthfully, you like the weight of him on top of you, and there’s a blanket just covering him. 
When you lean forward to pull it back, though, he jolts, sitting up straight. You sigh softly, feeling bad for waking him and wanting him to be asleep again. 
Your heart melts at the sound of his voice, soft and tired, and you place a soft hand on his face.
‘Come, darling. It’s late.’ 
You stand up, giving a hand to Taehyung, who rubs his eyes and lets you pull him up and lead him to bed. 
In your bed, his arms are tight around you, and he’s murmuring to you, in his little space between asleep and awake, and he’s adorable.
It’s mostly just compliments, and how he feels about you, with a little, ‘You’re so cool it makes me want to be cooler.’ in there somewhere. 
And then he says, ‘I want to spend everyday with you,’ and it hits you that this is becoming a relationship. He’s not just a guy you’ve been seeing here and there; you’ve spent almost every day this week with him, and you’ve enjoyed it so thoroughly that you wouldn’t mind spending another month with him. 
Isn’t that crazy? You’ve never met someone of his magnitude before, and you find yourself smiling as he’s pushed up against you, because it’s so easy. You would’ve thought that loving someone as loud and eccentric as Taehyung would take effort. He’s just him, and you’re just you, and relationships aren’t really much more than that, are they? 
 They aren’t. Another month has passed since the night that Taehyung fell asleep in your arms, and you woke up to the realisation that you might even be falling in love with him. He lay, tucked into your neck, a soft, hazy smile painted on his face. You let him sleep there for a moment, even taking the time to open your phone and snap a few pictures of the two of you, smiling softly when you saw that your gallery immediately placed the pictures into a folder for Taehyung, recognising his face. Thinking about that for a moment, you wrapped an arm around him, letting your mind wander. It was crazy how, just 3 months ago, Taehyung didn’t exist in your mind. Almost miraculously, the stars aligned, and he became a physical manifestation of the man of your dreams, and you’ve held him tight, and processed that he’s real, and God, isn’t it wonderful to hold something between the clasps of your fingers and have it become more real, instead of merely withering away. Sometimes, you’d watch him; dancing around your kitchen, looking so at home, and you’d smile, paralysed with the happiness he made you feel. He’d dance and he’d sing and he’d perform, and you’d stand there, soaking it all up, waiting for him to outdo himself and make you fall just that little bit harder. 
You thought he never saw you, that you were something akin to a guardian angel, something to watch over him but never be watched yourself. How wrong you were. 
Taehyung thought he lived and breathed for you. Of course he didn’t, and he knew that, but it’s nice to pretend, isn’t it? And if it wasn’t for you, it was with you, and that was infinitely better. Under your gaze, he wasn’t a statue, he wasn’t something to be sculpted to perfection. He was him, and he was a little bit of you, too. And that was all he needed, to be honest. Taehyung understood what the two of you had; a transactional relationship. He’d thought about it a lot, how the two of you were your own people, constantly giving and receiving things that you knew the other would appreciate. You appreciated Taehyung’s acts of service, and he appreciated the way you complimented and reassured him; the pair of you were two wholes, who’d mixed together and become something even better. 
That day, as he lay in the safety of your arms, you contemplated those exact thoughts; you wondered what it was that he saw in you, what it was that you saw in him. The answers came to you easily, of course, but it was nice to think about what you meant to Taehyung, despite him telling you all the time. Being observed, you thought, was always a heavy thing, always something to be wary of and to watch out for. But with him, you loved being observed. You’d open yourself up for hours if it meant he’d watch. 
Taehyung woke up as that thought floated through your consciousness, and he placed a soft, tired kiss to your neck.
‘Did I wake you?’ You asked, voice smooth and unwavering. Taehyung let his eyes flutter shut at that, smiling hazily. 
‘No, no… well, kinda?’
Sending him a confused look, you turned to face him. 
‘Well usually I dream of you. Last night I didn’t.’
Your heart began to melt, began to break down and seep into the confines of your body, where you felt butterflies pound and beat at the inner lining of your stomach; but he continued.
‘Lucky me, though. My dream came true.’
At this rate, you’d seep into a puddle of all that he’d made you, and you’d be nothing but matter, but that still wouldn’t be enough, because he’d keep going, and he’d build you back up again, bit by bit, and you wouldn’t just be you, you’d be better. 
‘Wanna make mine come true?’ You replied with a wink. Taehyung looked at you in pure surprise, laughing when you swung your legs over him to give him a deep, gorgeous kiss. 
‘Always, sugar.’
 You spent the rest of that day wrapped up in the infinities of Taehyung’s brain, urging him to talk. Between the two of you, he absolutely was the talker. You had things to say, but Taehyung had things to say. You didn’t really mind, though, liking how much he spoke and how long for. In those moments, he reminded you so much of your old friend Mark Lee, who spoke so much you thought silence must have been foreign to him. But still, you listened.
Taehyung told you that he’d never truly known how good it felt to give until he met you, and how he’d go to the ends of the Earth for you, and general talk about how much you meant to him. Words have always been your thing, but at that moment, you didn’t say much. You did cry, though. And Taehyung laughed, but he felt for you perhaps more than he ever had before, and he remembered what he’d thought a couple of months ago; falling in love took time. But as he hugged you close to his chest, whispering sweet nothings in your ear about how much he adored you, Taehyung realised that he’d completely fallen. 
After you stopped crying, you made him talk some more. You warned him not to make you cry again with a menacing look, but the hints of a smile painted over the threatening look on your face, and he laughed at you. You found yourself shocked at first with how loud he laughed, but soon, you began laughing, too. 
‘I’m serious!’ You grumbled between laughter, pushing him slightly. Taehyung stuck his hands up with a defenseless look, but you knew he still wanted to laugh.
‘Fuck you, Taehyung.’
‘Come here, then.’
He really would find a way to make you burst one day. 
 For the next couple of weeks, Taehyung became a fully fledged star. He burned bright on nights you thought the world was permanently dark, and when you looked down at your arms, you saw the hints of starlight that he gave you, liquid running through your veins at a galactic speed; you almost missed it. 
Taehyung also taught you to focus. He took you on a couple more art gallery dates, because you wanted to be surrounded by the things he loved, and you wanted to slot yourself into that world, to see if you’d fit in. To be honest, you knew that you would, having heard him tell you that one of the most famous paintings ever reminded him of you. Still, seeing him look at you and compare you to the prettiest works of art he’d ever seen was intoxicating.
He stopped you a couple times, asked you to pose next to gorgeous statues and paintings, then telling you that he saw you in them, that when he saw beauty, you were what came to mind; you’d never smiled so hard.
As you walked through those galleries, you thought you may as well be walking on the moon; every step you took was feather light, and you floated through the air seamlessly. At one point you thought that the only thing keeping you tethered to Earth was the solidness of Taehyung’s hand in yours. But when you looked over at him, he looked like he had swallowed a galaxy. And it dawned on you that he was leading you past Earth, into a place you could call your own, a place where he was prettier than he’d ever been, because he was surrounded by the stars and the moon and the solar system, and he looked at home. More at home than you’d ever seen him, and you wondered what it’d take to get him to look (and feel) like this all of the time. 
He spoke to you about the paintings, he stuck his hands out in front of him and he showed you colours, brushstrokes, moods, conversations. All you’d seen before was a mere painting. Now you saw entire worlds, and you commended the artists for managing to create these, and you commended Taehyung for seeing them, studying them, sinking into them.
You’d always seen things in life, but when you left the gallery that day, and Taehyung still had that homely look in his eye, you really started to see them. Until then, you’d always regarded things in a low, hazy, light, thinking that life was more beautiful when you couldn’t really tell what it was. There was some truth in that, you thought, but you didn’t realise that you could see the world this clearly and still find beautiful things. It was dizzying, seeing the world for what it was, but when you looked at your boyfriend, that all dissipated. Even in the clear light of the gorgeous new world, Taehyung was perfect. And so were you.
 After Taehyung showed you his world, he made you show him yours.
You took him to a cat shelter, and you watched as the kittens flocked around him, eager to play with him. The same way you became immersed in Taehyung’s world, he became immersed in yours. Where he was the ethereal galaxy and the rings of Saturn, you were the oxygen in the air and the leaves on the trees. You pulled him down to Earth, and he flew you up to space; opposites attract, right?
Taehyung loved the shelter, smiling profusely and giggling at the way the cats loved him. The kittens fell asleep on him, and a few workers crowded around you, cooing at how adorable he was. A spike of pride surged through you; this was your boyfriend.
They snapped two polaroids of him, and you took a couple of pictures on your phone, all of you grinning and smiling over the shared bonding experience of loving animals. They seemed so at ease with Taehyung, and he was so extremely careful with them that it made your heart melt. You thought you might die at how adorable he looked when they fell asleep. In fact, a volunteer named Yuna smiled at you dazzlingly, telling you that the kittens only fell asleep on people they really liked; if you didn’t die of cuteness before, you definitely did now. 
There was one kitten that stood out to you both the most. You noticed her first; sleek black with piercing green eyes, she was gorgeous. 
‘Who’s that?’ You pointed at the kitten eagerly, turning to Yuna with a curious smile. She followed your finger, searching the crowd.
‘Oh! Her name’s Cleo. Our newest addition.’
You nodded mindlessly, hearing what Yuna was saying but not really listening, enamoured with the way Cleo snuggled up to Taehyung, absolutely stunned by how he received her love, how he stroked her and smiled down lovingly at her.
Taehyung watched you as you spoke to Yuna, smiling softly at your expressions and how instantly the two of you began to talk. He watched you smile at him, realising that you were in love with him, too, and it was then that he knew he’d have to do something. To commemorate you, and this new life the two of you were beginning. 
The space in between falling in love and saying it was exciting, you thought that evening, watching as Taehyung looked lovingly at the polaroid of him and the cats. You’d both realised, at that point, that you loved the other, but you hadn’t said it, leaving the other love languages to speak for themselves; physical touch, quality time, acts of service. Together, you’d become almost machine-like in your determination to let the other know that you loved them; Taehyung woke you up every morning with a kiss, reading to you and washing your hair. And you went out of your way to find out more about art, to discuss it with Taehyung, to immerse yourself in him and his world. 
Everything became brighter, more passionate, happier. 
 That brings you to today. You met Yuna from the cat shelter again last week, and the two of you became instant friends, finding out that loving animals wasn’t the only thing you had in common. 
You spoke about everything; your boyfriends, your hobbies, other friends you both had. Yuna was a comforting presence. You truly felt as if you could say anything to her, and she’d agree, while not being afraid to disagree. 
You’re with her now; she asked you out to lunch a couple days ago, and Taehyung mentioned that he was busy, too, so you had absolutely no reason to say no. 
So here you are, almost done with lunch and listening to a story Yuna was telling you.
‘That’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard, oh my God!’ You smile, clearing up your empty plate and setting it aside. Yuna follows suit, swallowing a last bit of salad and continuing.
‘You know, like, when two people are totally meant to be together? It was like that.’
Smiling softly, you think of Taehyung, remembering how his hands fit perfectly into yours and how he finishes all of your most bizarre sentences; if any two people were made to be together (aside from Yuna’s two friends, of course) it’s you and Taehyung. 
Reading your thoughts, Yuna takes your hand and pulls you out of the restaurant, immediately bringing up Taehyung; 
‘How are you guys? You’re so lucky, you know?’
You absolutely do know, and you tell her that, swearing up and down that he’s the best man you’ve ever known, that you’d be a fool not to be with him. 
‘I’m literally gonna melt, you guys are adorable!’
Her voice dips up and down, and she lets you talk about him, asking questions and swearing that you’re the luckiest woman alive. You smile, basking in her compliments, knowing that they’re true and still, urging her to say more. Yuna laughs at that, telling you that she’d compliment the two of you anytime, anyday. 
‘So… Do you love him?’
You slow down your walking, taking a moment to think. There’s not really much to think about; you love Taehyung. But, God, won’t it be weird to say it?
‘Yeah. I really do.’
 Yuna is dramatic, you soon realise. In a way that’s different to Taehyung, but makes you think of him all the same. You wonder if everyone will remind you of him in some way, if he’s influenced your life that much. Looking around, at the trees and the flowers and the sun, you think of him, of his hands and his smile and the face he always pulls when you complain about Marvel movies, the way he looks just before he falls asleep and how he sounds whenever you kiss him; he’s everywhere. 
‘So how was today’s shopping sesh, babe?’ Yuna asks, with a soft nudge at the bags you’re almost struggling to hold between your fingers. You give her a smile, gushing about the clothes you got and how excited you are to try them on — a little shallow, sure, but happiness is happiness, right?
Yuna definitely thinks so, with all of her new outfits and makeup and shoes. She really is fighting her way up your list of friends, almost at the top after a single hangout session. She was patient with you as you shopped, holding things she somehow knew you’d go back for, waiting as you tried things on, complimented you on dresses that you weren’t sure about; the perfect shopping partner. 
Now, as you walk her up her road, the two of you are chatting mindlessly about your lives and getting to know the other better, and the sun shines bright, you let yourself go. Life is good. And not just because of Yuna, but because everything has been falling into place recently. 
Before you left Taehyung’s apartment this morning, he pulled you back, kissing you with a force that wasn’t new, but still thrilling, and he told you not to be back too late, that he had something for you. He tends to do that a lot; get you things whenever he doesn’t see you. Whenever you ask why, saying that he doesn’t have to, that you’re happy with what you’ve already got, he kisses you, and he says, ‘I just see you in all the pretty things I come across.’ And you smile when you kiss him back, wondering how you ever got so lucky. 
Today, though, he kissed you just a bit harder, and he looked so excited that you thought he might burst. You felt little buzzes of electricity as he grabbed you by the arms, and you felt sparks in his kiss; maybe today will be different. 
 It is. When you step out of the elevator and onto your floor, the smell of baking overcomes you, and you’d be stupid not to realise that it’s Taehyung. It’s from his apartment, and it smells way better than the baking he’s done in the past. (Last week he burnt an almost-perfect batch of cookies, and his apartment didn’t rid itself of the smell for 4 days.)
He’s growing, before your eyes, and that makes you smile as you put your stuff in your apartment, leaving the bags as they are and trotting over to your boyfriend’s. 
It truly does smell heavenly, and you wonder slightly if this is what he had for you, rather than a necklace or perfume that he usually gets you.
When Taehyung opens the door, the smell hits you like fresh air, and you think you might never have taken a deep breath before this. You stop for a moment to take in the smell, to breathe in and be thankful for the life in front of you. 
‘Hey, sugar. Come, I have something for you.’
He sounds normal, sure, but when you look at Taehyung his eyes are bright and loving, and his hands are eager and possessive. You smile, letting him pull you through his apartment and into the kitchen. 
‘Please tell me it’s this.’
You point at the cloth covered oven tray behind Taehyung, and he grins like a schoolboy, and you think that maybe you’d never even lived before this, because what’s life without a man like him by your side? You think for a moment, knowing that you had lived before this, and it mattered, because it was every decision you’ve ever made that led you to the sight before you; a man who is undoubtedly in love with you. 
‘It is. But let’s talk first.’
Taehyung grabs the oven tray, covering the bottom with the cloth to avoid burning his hands, and you follow him through to his front room, gasping at how pretty everything looks: He’s lit candles, turned off the light, made everything yellow and hazy and gorgeous, and you feel yourself getting more excited by the moment, because Taehyung is innovative and he’s smart and he’s exciting and he’s generous. 
‘(Y/N). I don’t know how to say any of this. I’m usually good with my words, but today I have nothing. I’d like to maybe say that you take my words away, that whenever I’m with you I can’t do anything but focus on you, but you inspire me, sugar. To a point where I have to take a moment and process that, before you, I created things with no meaning aside from the things I made up. And now that I have you, I don’t have to make things up anymore, because you are the reason for all the things I make.’
You feel tears welling up in your eyes, but you persist, staring at Taehyung with eyes that burn bright and fierce in the face of his confessions. 
‘But especially this. You know, I always compare you to artwork, and I say that beautiful things that exist remind me of you, and they do, but I never realised how lovely it’d be to just make things, and make you the objective purpose of them. No other meanings. Just you.’
Taehyung leans behind you, and you don’t process anything, because you’re pushing back tears and trying not to smudge your makeup. 
It’s small, but it’s something, and you let your tears fall when you look at it. It’s the bench that you screamed off of all those months ago, when you were drunk and on top of the world. It makes you melt, the fact that something so simple is what he feels is the most important thing that the two of you have done. If you were to paint something, it’d be this, too, simply because you really felt alive that night, under the stars in the sky and the stars in Taehyung’s eyes. 
‘I think I’ll remember that night forever. And now this.’
He turns to the coffee table, and pulls the cloth from underneath the oven tray. Carefully, you wipe away tears, leaning forward to see what he’s made. 
They’re cakes; not normal ones, they’ve got letters written on them. You grin as you read them, realising that they say, ‘I love you,’ on them.
Holding back yet another round of tears shouldn’t be this hard or this forced, so you let them out now, weeping profusely at the way Taehyung watches you, waiting for your reaction. 
You don’t say anything, pulling him into what you think must be your most passionate kiss yet. For ages, you’ve been dancing on the line between like and love, and now you can say it, and it’s a lot of pressure, but for Taehyung you’d do anything, so you speak. 
‘I love… Fuck, you really know how to make me cry. I love you. A lot. I’ve known for a while. I’m not really a ‘love at first sight’ kind of girl, but you’re gorgeous and gorgeous things make me act stupid. I’m in love with you. And for once it’s not scary. Thank you.’
You don’t manage much else, smiling at how Taehyung softens at your confession, and at how his hands tremble, much like they did on your first date, where he ached to touch you and didn’t. And now, months later, his hands have made a home all over you, in places you blush thinking about, in areas you thought no one’s hands would dare to touch, in places so plain and meaningless that you wondered why he spent time on them, why he spent ages kissing the back of your hand and your left knee and the tip of your right ear.
It’s insane, how there’s no area either of you have left unseen, or touched, how you spent ages talking about things you’d never done until the other introduced you, how you both opened up like flowers in the spring for the sweet nectar of the other, eager and desperate and aching for love. 
‘Thank you, sugar. Can I get a picture of you with the cakes? You look adorable.’
Wiping the last of your tears, you’re sure you look a mess, but you give Taehyung your brightest smile and your happiest pose, making sure he knows that you absolutely do adore him. You might have just said it, sure, but you really want it ingrained in his mind; You, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), are in love with Kim Taehyung. And he loves you, too. What a wonderful world it is. 
 Four months later, you are still as deeply in love with Taehyung. You went to your apartment to hang the painting, knowing a perfect place for it, and you smiled, knowing that everytime you passed it, you’d think of him, and all he’d done for you. 
And if Taehyung was everywhere before, he was your galaxy now. Every waking moment, you thought of him, keeping him close enough to kiss those pretty lips whenever he crossed your mind. The two of you spent everyday together, talking and kissing and touching and doing everything that you’d ever wanted to do. Together.
Taehyung introduced you to his closest friends, Jimin and Jungkook. You’d heard tons about them, and they seemed wonderful, but you’d never met them, so Taehyung invited them to his for what he called a ‘dinner party.’ (If vodka and skittles counts as a dinner party, that is.)
You meshed with them immediately, actively listening as they told you about some of Taehyung’s worst choices over the years; how he used to wear turtlenecks in the summer heat, claiming he wanted to be taken seriously, how he once spent an entire day staring in the mirror, because Jimin told him his eyes were uneven, how he almost set his old apartment on fire by rolling a joint with blotting paper. You laughed the entire day, sure that your cheeks would hurt by the evening, but not caring, because it was fun to just sit back with people you felt like you’d known your entire life and talk, under the autumn wind and mildly starry skies.
Your boyfriend sat there, grumbling about how he, ‘never should have introduced you to them,’ and how they’re, ‘liars. My eyes weren’t uneven.’ 
But you loved Jimin and Jungkook, inviting them to yours for a ‘classy’ dinner party, which earned you a playful scowl from Taehyung, who said he’d spent so much on weed and alcohol that he’d eat sleep for dinner for the next week. You laughed, giving him a soft kiss and thanking him genuinely for introducing you to his friends. He lightened up a bit then, smiling and asking you if they told you about the time he almost peed on a man in the woods.
‘No, they definitely didn’t. You’re foul, Tae, how does that even happen?’
 The rest of that night lies in your heart as one of the most precious times in your relationship with Taehyung, and he lives in you forever young, a wispy spirit in the wind, urging you to run forward, to chase him and kiss him when you catch him, because kisses are the currency of the love you’ve created with him, and he says he’ll die if you don’t kiss him 10 times a day. You wonder how you’ve managed to match and exceed that number, how you don’t ever get tired from the way Taehyung kisses you, slow and soft, or hard and fast, or just in the middle, where his hands run up and down your waist and he bites your bottom lip softly and swallows your little whimpers, the noises you reserve for him and the videos you make with him, because you two are creative robots that’ll burnt out if you don’t create, and what better creation than love, right?
And love makes you mix together, makes you meld together and blend and whatever other words can describe how you and Taehyung seem to be the exact same person, with different bodies and different minds but the same soul.
Before your second date, as Taehyung’s hand was enveloped firmly in yours, you remember thinking that you were excited to meld into him, to mix with him until you weren’t sure if you were more you or more him. And now, lying in his arms in this smooth daylight, you really aren’t. 
Was it him that started adding, ‘babe’ to the start of every sentence or was it you? Was it you that showed him the patterns in the sky or did he suddenly look up and notice them? He’s sure it was you, but the memories are hazy all the same. (See? There’s still beauty in the hazy parts of the world.) And was it him that told you to listen to Sade’s debut album or did you always know it? However, you attribute the prettiest songs on that album to him, so even if you did know it, all you can think of when you hear it is Taehyung; his slender body, his boxy smile, the way he calls you sugar and the way he loves you. 
Funny how sugar brings people together, right?
How it was one normal thing that led to this many good ones, how sometimes random things send you fateful people, how love can rise from nothing but neighbourly kindness and a bag of sugar. Life is perfect, now, and you owe it all to the bag of sugar that sat right at the back of your cupboard, unused and alone, the same one that Taehyung has a picture of (he’s really the most cliche man you’ve ever met), and the one you never thought would bring you here, into the arms of a man almost too good to be true. 
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stayjimin · 4 months ago
“the world is down here” | kth
pairing: kim taehyung x reader
genre: angst, comfort
warnings: depressive themes, lots of escapism
word count: 1.1k
summary: there’s a world in the stars, one infinitely better than the one down here on earth. but taehyung wants you to stay in reality, and you think if he’s down on earth it might be worth it.
a/n: i wrote this for @taetaespeaches​ for her birthday this week!!! i wasn’t able to write the build your own fic this week so i’m posting this for now :)
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The night is chilly, causing tips of noses to turn red and fingers to retract into sleeves of hoodies. Time had ceased to exist long ago, becoming numbers on a clock and no longer having any meaning or jurisdiction over you. The concrete of the roof is stiff under your back, the rolled blanket under your head being the only support against the hard ground.
It’s the stars, they have a life of their own, in a world of their own. There’s solace in the cool night and the shifting celestials, dotted by the occasional traveling plane or, if you’re lucky, a meteor that streaks across the dark. The heaviness of the day, the burden of every day before that, seems to not exist within the mess of stars, seems to float away and become part of the milky way.
The door to the stairs creaks open, light from the hallway blinding you slightly, and then the door closes as quickly as it opens. “I thought I’d find you up here,” Taehyung’s voice fills your ears. You hum at his words, smile at him, but settle back into the floor. He sits down next to you, rolls up his blanket, (Did he have a blanket in his hand? Did you really not notice?), and lays down next to you, his shoulder just barely touching yours.
“Are you cold?” he asks after a beat of silence, his head rolling to the side to look at your profile. You shake your head, chew on your lip, a bit worried about words failing you. He lets out a sigh of surrender, settles on gazing up at the night sky with you.
You want to let him in, want to tell him about how catastrophically awful the world has been, want to tell him you are cold, actually, (Could you please have his jacket? Maybe the blanket he’s laying on? He could just lay on you instead.), want to tell him the way the day, the week, the month, has been too much.
You want to tell him that things only make sense in the stars, (It’s another world, Taehyung. Do you see it?), but you always assume he knows anyway, assume he knows why you lay on the roof for hours, so you always settle for the silence.
“Was your day okay?” he asks, pushes, not looking over at you this time. 
Your breath catches, hands a little clammy. You’re sure if he looks at you he’ll see the quiver of your bottom lip, the slight gloss over your eyes, the way you retract into yourself without even moving. He knows you too well, too well, too well, even if talking about your inner workings doesn’t come naturally. 
He hums questioningly when you don’t answer, time has passed without you noticing, has moved on without you again, leaving you a few moments behind, forced to catch up.
“It was fine,” you say simply, imagine the stars in the sky spinning. Spinning, spinning, spinning, they’re running away with the time you’ve missed on their backs, streaking through the sky with the minutes as their fiery trails. “Which of these stars do you think have galaxies?” you ask, deflect. “Do you think any of them have planets? What if those planets have moons?”
Taehyung almost smiles, almost, you notice in your peripheral the way the corners of his mouth barely upturn. But he doesn’t answer, and you wonder if he thought your question was rhetorical, but you wanted his opinion. (The bright star right there, straight up above, must have planets that orbit it. It’s too vivid not to, too compelling to not-)
“You can stare at the stars all you want, but you won’t find what you’re looking for up there,” Taehyung says simply, quietly. “The world is down here.” The words slice through the quiet air like a dagger, poke through the kink in your armor that you didn't know was there.
The gloss that had covered your eyes begins to turn into tears, turns your cheeks wet, causes you to sniffle.
“What a mean thing to say,” you tell him, whisper, voice catching in the back of your throat. (Why won’t he let you escape to the sky?)
Taehyung props himself up on his elbow, looks down at you. He reaches his free hand to smooth through your hair, runs the tip of his finger down the bridge of your nose. You don’t retract, despite the bitterness in the pit of your stomach. “I don’t want to be mean,” he tells you. “But you’re not up there, you’re down here. You’re here, I’m here.” He presses his warm palm against your cool cheek, rubs his thumb against the angry red stains on your skin. “We’re here,” he insists. “I’m right here.”
“But here is so hard,” you whimper, sniffle, chew on your bottom lip. “It’s so easy up there.” You hate the way the words sound when you say them out loud, hate the way you believe them.
“I know,” Taehyung says to you, voice genuine. And you hate the way he understands, the way he takes your seemingly nonsense emotions and makes them normal. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’m sorry it’s hard. Let me make it easier,” he says, almost pleads. “Please?”
You let out the sob now, the one hidden behind walls of grief and fear, let it rattle your bones and heal the cracks in your heart. And you fold yourself into him without even realizing, sit up and tuck yourself into the warm mess of his limbs. He doesn’t care that your tears soak the fabric of his shirt, seep through until the skin of his chest feels the wetness too. He doesn’t ask you to explain, he doesn’t need you to.
He waits for you to find the necessary pieces, waits for you to reclaim yourself from the stars, for you to rebuild your soul back here on earth. “I love you,” he reminds. “I’m here, you’re here, we’re here. I love you.” The words don’t fall on deaf ears, they penetrate the thickness of your skin, tape a missing piece here, fill in a gap there.
“I love you,” you say. “Can we go home?” you say. “I promise to let you in,” you say. (“I promise I’ll stay now,” you don’t say. “I promise to not rebuild the walls.”)
He kisses your hair, nose, cheeks, chin. He uses the sleeve of his shirt to wipe your tears, your runny nose. “Let’s go home.”
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delightfulserendipity · 7 months ago
Puppy || kth
↔Genre: romance; fluff; dad!doghybrid!taehyung x pregnant!human!reader.
↔Warnings: mentions of fear; suggestive mentions; crying; cruelty towards hybrids.
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Stirring lightly in your lover's embrace, the quickened pound of your heart roused your somnolent hybrid until his arms instinctively pulled you closer.
His sleep filled eyes warmed in the sun light that kissed his honeyed skin; pure love and adoration for the one who saved him from the harshness of a local shelter was revealed in his vulnerable state as he peered into your own.
But his brows furrowed lightly once his enhanced senses caught the twinge of fear that radiated from you.
It was metallic and cold- a scent the once stray knew well and never wanted to find upon you- his mate.
"You smell like worry, pup. What's the matter?"
The low timbre of his voice crackled in your hearing, thinking a simple bad dream roused you from the serene slumber you both took advantage of in the late hours of the languid morning.
But your breathing faltered at the innocent inquiry.
A collection of odd behaviour had prompted you to rush to the pharmacy in search of a pregnancy test.
The sudden changes such as cravings for Taehyung's favorite biscuits as well as your unwillingness to be any place other than his side had soon been confirmed with two little pink lines.
You were pregnant.
However, the discovery that left you crying in happiness also dripped troubled tears down your cheeks and even followed you deep into the arms of your love, where your troubles always perished from the moment they wound around your form.
The mixing of a pure human dna and a untainted hybrid lineage was greatly frowned upon by all. Their life would surely be deemed unlovable to the world.
You feared the worst, and you had yet to summon the courage to burden your partner with the same concerns, wanting nothing more than love to ever envelop him.
"N-no, Tae- I'm fine." His head tilted lightly whilst a golden ear perked at your words, the waning scent of worry you carried told him other wise.
You attempted to slip away from his strong hold and questions until his lithe fingers glided across your skin ticklishly to tug you beneath him once more.
You laughed lightly at the steady sway of his tail and rectangular grin. No matter what had hurt you and placed you in darkness, he was your light to guide you into his arms.
"Tae, that really tickles-"
Despite your weak protests, he shoved his features deep into the crook of your neck. His fingers could feel the rapid thrum of your heart that beat faster in fear of his heightened canine senses discovering the change you were too frightened to tell of.
He took in a large breath of your scent, to fill his lungs pleasantly like a flowers fragrance before he returned the hot blow against your flesh and brought chill bumps across your arms.
"You smell different," he stated, yet it hung in the air uncertainly as he caught the hint of a third scent that seemed to favor his own buried deep within you, surrounded by your aroma.
It was soft and warm like the calming vanilla that followed you, but also the petrichor of Taehyung. It was the prefect mixture of you both. And he found it bewitching.
"You smell even sweeter." He breathed, rather content with the aroma that followed you.
Your heart nearly stilled. How foolish you had been to think he wouldn't notice the change deep within you.
His senses were as strengthened as that of a blood hound in spite of his adorable pomeranian counter part.
It was impossible to even sneak a bite of his favorite treat without him begging for just or nibble from your lips or even slip into your home unnoticed for his birthday without his joyous greeting of kisses.
How could you hide something that was a part of him?
Your eyes ventured into the plush surroundings that lay just outside the protective swathing of his arms, as if your nonchalant answer lay between the pillows.
"Perhaps I forgot to wear my perfume."
You timidly tried to excuse yourself, but the hesitance in his puppy eyes told you he wasn't falling for your nervous fibs.
His head tilted as if to question you before he dipped his nose into the sensitive flesh of your clavicle to trace the ticklish area with kisses and light breaths.
He ventured from the hollow of your throat and dared to explore the valley of your breast and abdomen before he halted just at the small mound of your belly where the scent was strongest; your tickled giggles floated in the air surrounding him all the while.
The delicate aroma met his nostrils and beckoned him to the great heights of euphoria.
Yet, he trembled lightly against you, with the realization every finding suggested of his most beloved desire. You were pregnant.
"Not quite love," his brows kneaded together in thought before a boyish blush lightly glazed his bread- like cheeks.
"Have you taken a test since-" his words stopped there with a flustered smile once the memories of the heated night you spent against his chest returned to bring warmth over him.
You gasped softly and hid your burning cheeks into his firm chest, which he chuckled at until your head nodded feebly.
His breathing halted as silence enveloped your intertwined bodies like an old friend, with nothing more than your thrashing hearts to be heard.
"W-what did it say, pup?"
Pure curiosity eclipsed the fears that troubled the rush of excitement the notion of welcoming another into your little space that over flowed with love to simply add more light into his life than you already had brought.
The mere concept of cuddling a little mixture of your qualities close to his chest and squishing their cheeks just for the angelic giggles they exuded nearly swelled his heart with the love he had for his little family.
He only prayed for the confession to fall from your lips, to make what he only toyed with in the safety of his reveries- a reality.
But all of these things were unknown to you.
With a tender nibble upon your lower lip, you worried if he truly wanted this with you.
Raising a child was no easy task, let alone one with genetics halved between a canine hybrid like Taehyung and a mere human such as yourself.
But you were hastily comforted by the memories of the gentle sway of his tail as he cuddled Jungkook's own little girl with long midnight ears close or the loving glow that emanated from his honeyed irises exclusively for the squirming puppy within his grasp.
It was evident little ones seemed to flock to him, he was just an overgrown puppy himself which is why so many adored him just as you had.
All of these remembrances comforted you and soothed your heart enough to coax the words from your lips as his eyes lovingly set upon your own.
"It was positive, Tae." You whispered softly, toying lightly with the golden ears atop of his locks which were messy with sleep as they fluttered against your bare skin.
His lips parted in a barely audible "oh" before he shone with a wide smile and his golden tail swished against your legs; his eyes grew round just as your stomach had subtly under his oblivious view.
As if you had gifted him with the finest present, his fingers tenderly pushed away the soft material of his sweater you had stolen for his scent alone; to have his presence hold you close even when he could not- to reveal the vulnerable area to himself.
His tail slid between your legs to tickle the flesh with every brush whilst he surrounded both you and your tummy, to place you both in his safe haven.
In spite of his excitement of meeting a mini you or him, his fleeting touch was albeit feather like and almost fatherly; even if he had only learned of his baby's existence literal seconds ago.
"Hello little one," he giggled through his boxy grin that rippled your abdomen in your own chortle.
"I can't believe we made something so perfect. I'm so in love with you both."
He confessed ever so softly, pressing clusters of kisses just below your navel.
"I'll love you with your mommy- even in your chewing stage." He added with a light chuckle at the dreams of his little one nibbling upon all in it's bright path.
The beauty of the moment collided with the sudden pregnancy hormones that ravaged your body melted your laughter into the warmth behind your eyes to drip down your cheeks and call Taehyung above you.
His thumbs hurriedly brushed over your dampened features with soft hushes and a shining smile that was ready to proclaim to all of his little family.
"You and this little life we created makes me so happy- and I swear to adore and protect you both."
With a tender kiss to the corner of your mouth, he excitedly delved into the promises of the future with your little one; with you both held close in his arms, never to be let go.
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Tag list: @holaaaf @stayforarmy @yourwonderbelle
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mochii0park · 17 days ago
metanoia; 01 | kth
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Title: Metanoia
Pairing: Taehyung / Reader
Part of series: Waterlilies and Japanese Bridge
Genre: angst I collage!au
Pairing: student!reader x photographer!taeyhung
Word count: 4,7k
Summary: Vante, a household name among photographers became known for his minimalistic photography style that came along with his secret persona. Never showing his face on his own exhibitions fueled the public’s desire to learn more about him which skyrocketed his fame. While preparing for his next exhibition Vante went missing. Disappeared into thin air and even now a year later was never found.
Author’s note: I am very conscious of any grammar mistakes. Although I have read this chapter three times I am sure I’ve missed some so bare with me. 
On another note, I have switched the dates of the chapters for Saudade and Metanoia. Since this story got more attention compared to Sauade I’ve decided to write it before the date.
This is my first attempt at writing on this platform and I hope it will reach out to a wider range of readers and catch your interest. Any feedback is greatly appreciated.
Taglist: @ggukkieland​ @honig-und-millch​ , @deliciousdetectivestranger ,
Metanoia masterlist
< intro | next chapter >
You sink into the overaged draggled yellow chair, catching second-hand embarrassment at the sight before you. The boy walked about, his thrusts not enough to keep the neon hula hoop from falling. He attempts to fumble his way out of the mess, but it was too late. The left ankle twists itself and before you know it, he hits headfirst against the wooden flooring. The professors rush towards him, medics following behind. The boy tries to pull himself up but fails his body slumping against the stage. To your left Mingi snorts, stuffing his face with popcorn amused by scene playing out.
“I don’t mean to sound rude or whatever, but people need to search up the meaning of talent before their eyes skip to the word show.” Minnie ruckles her nose, her mouth loop sided.
“I find this highly entertaining.” Mingi speaks up, mouth full of food. He takes a sip of the cold beverage rested in his lap and shakes the mixture before swallowing.
To his left Yeonjun shudders at him, “Talent or not I would rather replay that scene than watch Mingi be a slob. It makes me want to bleach my eyes out.”
Mingi rolls his eyes ignoring Yeonjun as he pops more popcorn, oblivious to his own weird antics. Although the four of you are friends for years, Mingi managed to take you all by surprise with his uncanny behaviour.
The second act starts and suddenly you contemplate your university choice. Reasonably the overbearing staff of your university wanted the timid first years to feel welcomed hence this so-called show. In hindsight you think a friendly party would’ve been just as good.
Halfway through the act you feel a light tap on your shoulders, professor Kim Namjoon stands there like a sore thumb in the mass of students’ bodies. With his hovering height, freshly dyed purple hair and the rimmed glasses on the bridge of his nose he was sure to stand out. He shifts his footing from one to the other foot anxiously waiting for you to follow him, few students commenting the disruptions that his appearance caused.
You observe him for a second, accompanying him out of the theatre into the cold November air. He fumbles through his leather briefcase before fishing out a small, crumpled flyer. Opening it he shoves it into your hands while tweaking his glasses.
“I have a favour to ask you Y/N. There will be a course taking place here and I would love for you to attend it with your peculiar friends.” He says emphasising the word peculiar.
You knew that Mingi gave Namjoon the creeps even though the latter denied it.
You push back the flyer spinning on the balls of your feet ready to join your friends.
“Y/L-…”, Namjoon groans, “Do it for your brother-in-law.”
Widening your eyes, you look at him shaking your head.” This isn’t the time to use our family relations to bribe me into a stupid course.”
“Did you even read what’s it about?”, you take the flyer from his hands skimming through it.
Photography course
Length: 10th November till 10th June
Time: Friday, 6pm -8pm
Attendance: Third years and above
Equipment not needed for the course
Your eyes pause at the date, laughing releasing itself from your chest. Surely Namjoon was kidding when suggesting this. You were in your last year which meant you would soon be flooded with work for your final project. In conclusion there was barely enough time for you set foot out of your studies let alone attend another one of the university’s poor attempts to make a course for students to bond over.
“You understand I’m in my last year. I don’t have time to go out and have fun with my friends. How in the world did you think I would fit a whole-ass course?”
Namjoon releases a breath running a hand through his thick hair, desperation evident on his face.” I am sorry to have to do this, but I am cashing in my favour.”
You become stiff mouth agape, incoherent vowels coming out of you. It takes you a few second to gather your thoughts, “you promised to not cash it in. You gave me your word.”
“And you gave me yours.” Namjoon retored sassily, finger pointing at you, “I won’t tell Sunmi if you promise to do me a favour when the time comes.”
Pushing your tongue against the palate, you try to control the boiling anger.
The incident happened four years ago, back when you were still figuring out your collage life.  Namjoon and you were acquaintances, sharing one elective course called German Literature. Needlessly to say both of you suffered greatly.
By the end of the year, you noticed your sister piqued Namjoon’s interest. Grossed out by the idea of your older sister engaging into any kind or relationship / activity with a twenty-three-year-old, you kept your distance until the faithful day.
Choi San was the synonym for the devil himself. With his fiery red hair and dazzling cat like eyes he lured you into his messy life of illegal parties and binge drinking. You still find yourself cringing at his pathetic excuses of professing his undying love to you when it was all under false pretences. His eyes bearing into your naïve soul, pulling your heart out and wrenching it until your friends came to pick up the pieces.
Sitting in the police station you counted down minutes before your older sister would burst through the door and finally decide to disown you. With your head nested between your knees you suck in the tears threatening to spill, the euphoria from the alcohol long gone. You’ve dialled Mingi’s number first, the other were a no go when it came to answering their phones. He picked up in matter of seconds. After explaining the situation, you figured he would bring his own parents to bail you out instead Namjoon comes first, after him a stressed Minnie trying to keep up the pace with him and a Yeonjun who’s pulling his masks further over his nose in a lame attempt to be unrecognizable. Mingi idly meanders behind them in his pyjamas with not one care in the world. Namjoon pulls a small amount of money handing the police officer and not long after you were free.
In that moment you’ve truly recognized your friends as the people you wanted to keep in your life forever. Namjoon jokingly said he would someday cash in his favour. Little did you know the joke would get over your head.
“You’ve waited for four years to cash it?”
He shrugs and nods lightly. Quickly he composes himself, washing his features of playfulness and switching them up with hopelessness. “It’s really important for me that you and your clique of friends attend this course. Professor Seojoon organized it-“
At the mention of your favourite professor your eyes light up making Namjoon shudders. The little “crush” you harboured didn’t go unnoticed by him. Putting his hands on your shoulders he gains your attention again before continuing, “his brother is the one to hold the course so it’s essential you come. I will put in a good word for you all. Maybe he will go easy on you during quizzes.”
You roll your eyes knowing fully well that you didn’t need Namjoon’s intervention although it was greatly appreciated. Putting the flyer in your back pocket you throw a thumbs up to Namjoon, “Well Minnie and I don’t need any favouritism and I am most certain you can’t do much for Yeonjun and Mingi seeing as they are in different departments.”
“Oh?” Namjoon’s brows shot up at the revelation, totally dismissing the idea that you know each other any differently than through the classes you attend, “I thought Yeonjun was in the literature department, as for Mingi it’s far-fetched but I didn’t want to sound rude.”
“Actually, Yeonjun is in the Vocal department while Mingi is in the Physics and Astronomy department. He’s also on top of his class, both are.”
Namjoon seems stunned at the information you threw at him, but he recovers swiftly, “Bunch of nerds.” He chuckles at his own jokes before both of you bid goodbyes. You slowly making your way to the cafeteria mind set on pursuing your friends to join you and Namjoon running to the staff meeting hoping to extinguish the chaos caused by the talent show.
Pushing past the mass of people on the campus your sneakers squeak against the pavement, the chatter between the students becoming louder as you push the cafeteria doors. Making your way towards the table in the further left corner you spot Yeonjun’s eye catching hair. The pink shade fits well against his pale skin making him noticeable from afar. The boy throws a piece of chips at Mingi, the latter catching it mid-air.
The rustling of your chair brings them out of their bubble. Minnie plops her elbows on the table, hand supporting her cheek as she lays it there, eyes staring at you amusingly. Mingi continues to catch Yeonjun’s chips, his attention now slightly focused on you. “How was the talk with professor Namjoon.”
“I need a favour to ask you.”
“Last time you asked for a favour we had to bail you from jail.” Mingi adds face void of any emotion causing Yeonjun to almost choke on the piece of chicken from his plate. Minnie reaches for his head hitting him hard on the back.
“That was four years ago for God’s sake.” You yell, a few students turning bothered by your loud voice disrupting their meal.
Slumping further into the seat, cheeks reddened from the heat of the sudden attention you gained you say quietly, “there is a course taking place this year and I would love if you could attend it.”
Mingi was the first to read the flyer once you push it in the middle of the old table. He hums a couple of times and gives you a thumbs up, unlike Minnie who scoff.
“A whole semester? Y/N you know this is impossible to juggle this with our final project. As much as I would love to participate you know what you’re asking for is too much.”
You bite your lower lip remembering Namjoon’s words. “I know but professor Seojoon is organizing it, and don’t you think having him on our good side would mean a lot?”
Minnie shrugs and pops the strawberry into her mouth. “I understand, but it’s on Fridays. The only time I can spare for parties and clubs, and you’re asking me to spend it studying something I am not even remotely interested in?”
You turn towards Yeonjun knowing if he agrees Minnie will crumble under the pressure of your group. He scans it quickly and shakes his lightly head from left to right before agreeing to accompany you making Minnie collapse her shoulders in defeat.
“Fine but if it takes too much of my time I am signing out.”
“I love you guys so much.”
“Cut it with the sappy shit, I have piano lessons.” Yeonjun gets up throwing you a goodbye before he disappears in the ocean of students his pink hair no longer visible. A distant scream could be heard a few seconds after, “I love you too.”
You smile feeling the love of your friends.
“We love you too.” Mingi gets up and places a carton of freshly squeezed apple juice in front of you sending off a small smile. Just like Yeonjun he’s gone.
 Nose buried deep into the book; Taehyung tried his best to mute out his brother’s lame attempts of starting a conversation he never intended to finish. Legs resting on the polished marble table he did his very best to further fuel Seojoon’s irritation. The older one pacing back and forwards provoking Taehyung’s headache.
 “If you would just listen to me.”
Kim Taehyung detested surprise, especially those he didn’t catch on early. This one though topped the cake. “There is no need to listen.”
“Quit being stubborn.”
“Oh, the irony.” Taehyung looked up catching his brother’s burning gaze,” contrary to your beliefs, I must say you are the one who’s stubborn here. When a person asks for space and time you give them that instead of forcing them, wait sorry what was the word again? Yeah, lightly pushing them into holding a course. One which they never asked for or showed desire to hold.”
“You needed a little push in the right direction.”
“Arranging a one-year course isn’t a push you idiot.” Taehyung shouted; the book long forgotten and tossed aside on his couch. His yell echoed in the empty room causing Seojoon’s to scowl. He found comfort in a small armchair adjacent from the marble table. “You can’t burry yourself in books and spend your days in the atelier. It’s not healthy Taehyung.”
“I don’t remember asking for advice.”
Seojoon was on the verge of giving up, letting the course get cancelled before it even happened hadn’t it been for the twelve people that signed up and Namjoon’s effort to recruit them.
“Look-“he takes a deep breath calming himself, “You can think of it as a one year course, but in reality it’s eight months. When you count Christmas, New Year, Easter you can cut one month coming to seven months in total. I’ve gone all out for this course, please don’t make me go and explain to my higher-ups why it’s cancelled before it even started.”
Taehyung shut his eyes trying not to feed the growing frustration inside him. Seojoon takes the time to look at his brother, the embodiment of pain. The eyes that used to shine brightly at the sight of new opportunities were now dull and empty, almost as if his soul left the body. It tore him apart to see Taehyung like that, powerless and what added more to his pain was the inability to help him.  
“It’s been a year since I’ve held a class.”
“I know you Taehyung. You are a man of many talents and there is nothing that can convince me otherwise. You need to move forward and face the fear you’ve been holding onto. It’s been a year. Nobody will judge you.” Seojoon’s eyes soften as he walks up to his brother ruffling his hair, hoping that his sincerity got through to him.
“I don’t know Joon.”
Before Seojoon could even start talking Taehyung shakes his head and moves hurriedly reaching for the knob. Seojoon takes a step towards Taehyung, but he doesn’t even give him a chance to speak as he runs right out of the door leaving him alone in the atelier.
The water drips from Taehyung’s wet hair down his face creating a false comfort, the sound of water coated a perfect cover to hide his emotional baggage. It became a habit of his to seek solace in the bathtub surrounded by lavender soaps that Yuna bought. A tradition carried on from their mother to them. The scent took Taehyung back into his childhood spent in his family home in Busan. Carefree of responsibilities and the heavy burden the world carried.
He recalls the delicate touch of his mother’s fingers untangling his locks while singing Elvis’s song can’t help falling in love. Her voice heartening Taehyung as he wept over a dispute he had with his second brother Hyungsik. The vivid memory of his mother placing a kiss on the crown of his head before wiping away the tears from his cheeks.
“Sibilings are there to teach you about life,” she whispers softly, “They teach you what it means to be kind, to be fair and to know you will not always be right. They teach you about teamwork, conflict resolution and most importantly Tae they teach you what it is to love and to be loved.”
Opening the door of Seojoon’s study, Taehyung is greeted with a sight to behold. Leaning against the door frame he watches Yuna and Hyungsik dancing in the middle of the muddled room, furniture pushed a side to create more room. They attempted to follow Yuna’s new choreography, Seojoon’s seated in the leather armchair grading assignments although he would glance up occasionally laughing at the duo. More like laugh at Hyungsik’s failed attempts but he didn’t need to know that. Noticing Taehyung’s presence, Yuna runs over linking their arms and pulls him forward oblivious to the slight tension between him and Seojoon.
“Idol my ass, “she scoffs at a gasping Hyungsik, “Taehyungie I need a dance partner for my new choreography. Hyungsik can’t even learn the basics.”
“Not my fault the younger generation goes overboard with their dances and outfits and singing. In my time we relied on our charms, and not how you call it? Fairy ending? What is even that?”
“It’s when idols finish the song, and the camera pans on of them giving them some more love and screen time. Right?” Taehyung looks at Yuna for approval. She places Taehyung’s hand over her shoulder, linking her arms around his waist while he kisses her temple and puts his cheek on top of her head.
“Admit it you’ve gotten old Hyungsik.” Seojoon derides.
That was enough to motivate Hyungsik to crack his fingers and reach for the tablet, “Give me the goddamn tablet. I’ll show you who’s old.” burying his nose into the gadget, he replays the video repeatedly.
By the time he made it through the first segment of the dance, Taehyung was sure he could blindly replicate the choreography himself.
“Couldn’t you ask one of your professor or other idols in training to help you?” Taehyung asks as the two observe Hyungsik’s rusty moves.
“One friend is busy finishing school project and Jungkook-ah has too many events lined up to help. I haven’t seen him since last Friday and I don’t feel comfortable asking Jimin-ssi to practice with me.”
“Isn’t he your professor?”
“Yes and no. He helps the idols which have already debuted in our entertainment company, that’s Jungkook. Jimin-ssi does occasionally step in when other professors are prevented from teaching. But he’s job is being a full-time professor at the EQ Royal Dance Academy.”
Taehyung nods, the information flying over his head as Hyungsik messes up a move and topples to the floor. He erupts into fits of laugher for the first time in weeks and Seojoon is suddenly reminded what’s it like to be happy. He knew brining Yuna home for the weekend would do Taehyung some good. The sight warms his heart, his siblings bickering loudly, breathing some life into the old room. Resting the assignments on the nearby table, he sits up to join them. Catching Taehyung’s gaze he looks towards the boy, brows raised.
“I’ve thought about it and-” Taehyung stops for a second, but Seojoon’s soft gaze prompts him to continue. “I’ll take the job.”
“Well, you better get ready because it starts in two hours.”
There were many ways you could spend your Friday night, like partying for instance yet here you are sitting in your car listening to Minnie whining. Mingi’s soul stuck somewhere on his iPod the second he set foot in the car, his head bobbing to the music blasting from his airpods. Yeonjon was the only one not present. Due to his idol actives, he was held back by his vocal coach, but he promised to be there for the second lecture.
Placing your analog camera on the desk, you tug your hair into a ponytail mentally preparing yourself for two hours of dullness. Minnie sits to your right while Mingi takes the chair to your left. The three of you seating yourselves in the front of the classroom, Namjoon’s words bunch of nerds playing in your head.
Shaking the thought away you see the watch tick eight pm as the door swings open.
When Namjoon told you professor Seojoon’s brother would hold the course you had expected a man either older than him or somewhere around his age, not a handsome make you take a double look type of a man; two or three years older than you.
His features were nothing short of a Greek god. He stood head and shoulders over you even when you were seated, confidence radiating from every fibre of his being as adjusts his bag over his shoulder. Pushing his brown curls away from his face he gives you an opportunity to look at it. Perhaps you were exaggerating but you never saw such gorgeous man. Straightening himself up you take notice of his attire for tonight’s lecture. An orange blazer draped over a white shirt brought out his sun kissed complexion paired with the same-coloured trousers. A type of anonymity laced itself with every step he took in your direction, his stare a mixture of coldness and determination.
He comes forward, eyes scanning each one of you before he sets his gaze on you. It lingers there for a second, his expression unreadable before he breaks it.
“Hello, my name is Kim Taehyung and I’ll be your lecturer for this course.”
For the first time you see Mingi’s focus entirely on Taehyung. His presence demanded to be felt and a part of you were sure he knew it. Taking the camera in his hand he turns towards you.
“I assume you have at least once taken a photo, whether with your phones or camera. Moreover, I am positive you have attempted to make an aesthetic photo for your Instagram feed. How many of you were successful?” laughter filles the lecture hall,” The goal of this lecture isn’t to make a photographer out of you nor to help you improve your skills. The point is to make you fall in love with photography. The rest will come easy.”
He walks around the desk and opens an old leather binder. Walking towards your table he places it in front of Mingi allowing the three of you to peek at the content of it. There neatly stored in a plastic sheet were his photos. Mingi pushes the portfolio in front of you, allowing easier access to both Minnie and you. Slowly leafing through the pictures, you stop in total awe.  Eyes trailing over a simple photo of a ray field caught somewhere in later November, early December judging by the snow. The contrast was striking, the clash of the colours and the depth of field creating an imaginary line between the ray and the sky.
Taehyung observes your dumbfounded expression, intrigued by your sudden amazement he ambles to your side. He rakes over the photo, which was there by sheer mistake, panic rushing through him. In a reckless attempt to stop you from further prying into the photos he grasps the portfolio out of your hold knocking over your camera in the process. It hits the floor shattering the lens into pieces, the film rolling down until it stops near his feet. Cursing himself for his abrupt action, he looks at you. Your eyes drift from the broken camera to Taehyung’s face.
He hurriedly squats picking the pieces, analysing the damage. Beyond repair.
“I am so sorry. I-” he says placing the parts on your table trying to come up with more words of apology.
“It’s alright.” You shuffle awkwardly in your seat not liking the spotlight put on you.
“I’ll be sure to repay you the coasts of a new camera.”
 You shake your head; the camera was already outdated, and you were sure Sunmi would let you borrow her digital one from the gallery. “It’s fine.”
Taehyung puts his lips into a thin line, the confidents he marched beginning to leave his body. Although you showed no anger or resentment towards him, he still felt the need to apologize. Swallowing the awkward moment, he paces towards the centre.
“Today we will start with simple terms such as ISO, Aperture and Shutter speed. Three things you should get familiar with.”
Fetching his Nikon camera from the case he turns it towards around. Swirling the button on the upper part of the camera he adjusts the mode to manual. Pushing another button towards himself the camera shows three circles in the middle of the screen.
“The first circle is shutter speed. That’s the speed the light of a camera sensor is exposed to a light when taking a photo. Slow shutter speed captures the blur of subjects in motion. It’s valuable for night and landscape photography. On the other hand, high speed allow you to freeze a single millisecond in time.”
Pointing to the middle circle he continues. “This is an aperture, the opening through which light passes through the lens to enter the camera. Its size can be modified to control how much light reaches the sensor.”
Lastly, he shows you the third button. “ISO represents the sensor’s sensitivity to the light. The higher the number, the most information will be captured in other words the picture will be brighter.”
Taehyung fumbles with the camera for a few seconds before he focuses it on you and with a click and shutter of light, he takes your photo. With no time to recover you feel a blush creep at the thought of how the picture turned out. “As you can see this is the perfect setting for indoor portrait. Now if we put the shutter speed high and the ISO low-“
He again takes a picture of you turning the camera screen to the students. The photo was dark, your features barely visible but still your figure could be distinguished. “This is an underexposed photo. Now if we set the shutter speed to let’s say 1/40 and places the ISO high-“
Expecting his move this time, you look up at the camera. Taehyung halts his action for a slight second before he presses the button. Looking at the photo, the brightness is overbearing. “This is an overexposed photo.”
He places the camera in front of Mingi, Minnie and you allowing you to take your time and compare the three photos he took. “Why am I showing you this? Because for your next assignment that’s what you will do. You will take three photos of the same object. The object you choose should be something that left a great impact on you. That can be your family, your friends or inanimate object such as phones, books etc. The choice is yours.”
Pulling out stacks of paper he leaves them on the corner of his desk.” These here are today’s study notes. I don’t expect you to write down notes while in the class, but I do expect you to finish your assignments. That will be all for today.”
The students began leaving the room each taking one paper, Taehyung stood there, hands in his pocket looking through every pupil that passed by. Minnie was first in line, her flirt mode on. You see them exchange a few words, Minnie’s behaviour suddenly going from sweet to sour in seconds. You dally your way to the desk aware of his gaze burning holes in the side of your head.
“Sorry, Y/N was it?” You peek up not expecting him to spare you a second let alone address you.
Taehyung scratches the back of his neck awkwardly.” I am sorry for what happened to your camera. I know you said it’s fine, but I feel responsible for it. I would feel better if you let me repay you by buying a new camera or at least participating in the coasts.”
“No, really it’s fine.” You laugh as you say it for the fourth time today.” I will borrow my sister’s camera for the course. If I do find myself in a need to buy a new camera, I will let you know.”
Before Taeyhung could protest you nod politely and leave the room. Biting his lip, he couldn’t help to feel bad about the wreck he made knowing fully well how much an analog camera costs nowadays. Taking the Nikon one from your table he swipes through the photos deleting each one before he pauses on the last one. It was the first black and white photo he took of you.
Your eyes were focused on Taehyung, although taken aback by the light they held their composure your mouth pulled into an affiliative smile. The white light made your baby hair stand out in the black background. For an unexplained reason Taehyung felt a small tug, one he couldn’t pinpoint the meaning of. Shutting off his camera, he exhales through his nose and throws the bag over his shoulder.
First lecture done, thirty-three to go.
all rights reserved @moochi0park
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xpeachesncream · 5 months ago
cloud nine | masterlist
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⟼ perfectly wrong ⟼  restart
☁ cloud nine playlist ☁  
summary: 2 years later, your marriage to taehyung brings people back from your past, new hardships with your bestfriends and tiny roommates who get away with everything just by being cute?
pairing: reader x husband!kth
genre: marriage au | fluff, angst, smut
warnings: cussing, mature language/implied sexual content, unprotected sex, oral sex, dirty talking, insecurities, jealousy, arguments, alcohol consumption, verbal attacks, anger outbursts, crying, etc. (individual warnings for each chapter will be included)
note: *important -- this is PART 3 to ‘PW’ and ‘restart!’ you must read those first in order to understand what’s going on and the timing. this is purely fictional and was created out of imaginary ideas. this is not a real portrayal of any of the characters involved!
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eleven (release: week of 9/27)
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