#klaine advent 2020 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wowbright · 2 years

Text

Fic: Of Good Report

Klaine Advent 2020: zealous

Words: ~9000 words

Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: It shouldn't be that hard for Kurt to come out to his new companion. But for some reason, it is.

Apparently I never posted my final installment of the Mormon!Klaine universe for Klaine Advent 2020. This one fits in right after Indispensable.

My Mormon!Klaine Masterpost.

Notes: One of the things I was thinking about writing today involves characters in this vignette monstrosity. I went looking for it and realized I had never posted it. May or may not post a new vignette today—this should take a while for people to get through, and I have baking to catch up on. Heads up for institutional and internalized homophobia, but it’s all very polite :/ If you have any questions or typo corrections, feel free to use my ask box!

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Coming out on his mission was a never ending and sometimes exhausting process. In high school, Kurt had avoided it as much as possible—at first, because he didn't want to admit it to himself, and later because it felt too sacred. He didn't understand why God had made him the way he was, but he had received spiritual confirmation that it was not a mistake. God had a plan for him. And telling people who hadn't earned his trust would be like gabbing about Heavenly Mother or Kolob in front of non-members. It would be throwing pearls before swine.

So he told his dad and his bishop, and he’d stopped denying to anyone who assumed he was. Carole and Finn knew, of course. Mercedes? He wasn't sure.

Before Kurt left for his mission, his bishop had advised him to be up front with his missionary companions so that any misunderstandings could be avoided. “Your mission presidents will know, of course. It’s in your file—”

Of course it was.

“—so they can fully support you. But your companions should know, too.”

“But why? They can't date girls while they're on a mission, I can't date guys … ever. I won't do anything inappropriate.”

“I know, Kurt. I’m confident in you. Your faith is so strong, and I have no reason to think you would stray from it on your mission. But you'll be living in close quarters with other guys. Missionaries can be a huggy bunch, and you’re encouraged to remind your companions often of your love for them. Personally, I think that will be good for you, learning to build loving, brotherly relationships with other priesthood holders. But there will be times you need to set boundaries. For example, I can't imagine it would be comfortable for you to have one of your roommates hanging around the apartment all the time in nothing but his garments.”

The words alone sent Kurt into the low-level dread he experienced every time he walked into a locker room. The feeling must have leaked onto his face, because the bishop merely nodded and continued without waiting for an answer. “So it's important for logistical reasons. And it's also important for your relationship with your companion. Your companion is the person you will be leaning on most for spiritual support and accountability. So they need to know who you are.”

Kurt didn’t like anyone knowing who he was. Not inside and out. Even his dad, who he would trust with his soul—there were things he didn’t share with him. That’s what God was for.

“You don't have to go into details, Kurt. You don't have to say more than you're comfortable with. You don't even have to follow my advice. But promise me you'll pray about it? The Holy Ghost will guide you in the right direction.”

“You've probably heard of me before,” was the first complete sentence spoken to Kurt by his very first companion. They were sitting across each other at the cafeteria table at the Missionary Training Center—everyone called it the MTC—and their assignment was to learn three things about each other to share with the group after lunch.

“Um …” Kurt peered at the boy’s name tag. Elder Saint James. It didn't ring a bell. Maybe he was a minor Utah celebrity? “No. I don’t think so. I’m from Ohio.”

“Ohio. That's somewhere out east, right? I think maybe I've flown over it before. I'm from California. LA. Near Hollywood. I know I'm not supposed to mention my first name, but maybe the last name rings a bell?”

“Not really. It's a pretty unique last name. I think I would remember it.”

“Maybe you never look at the credits. I'm sure you've seen my face before, though. I was in Thor, you know.”

“I … you were?” Kurt hadn’t seen the movie, but he’d seen plenty of posters and memes. He peered at Elder Saint James, trying to match anything in his memory with his new companion’s face. But it wasn’t very distinctive. He was white with mousy brown hair and light brown eyes, with a wide forehead and square jaw that would have made him look older than his nineteen years, if it hadn't been for round cheeks that kept him baby-faced. Something about him reminded Kurt of the kids who ate paste in nursery school. But maybe that was just the large servings of applesauce and tapioca pudding on his tray.

“Yes. In the Asgardian crowd outside the castle when Loki …”

From the detailed description that ensued, it became apparent that Elder Saint James had been an extra. “That’s cool,” Kurt said, then immediately regretted it when his new companion launched into a ten-minute resume that included several church-produced shorts and ended with “The week before I came out here, J.J. Abrams’ people called my people about me auditioning for a part in the next Star Trek movie. Between that and all the marriage proposals I was getting from my female fans, it was tempting to stay. But ultimately, the Lord's work is more important. Hollywood can’t beat heaven, am I right?” Elder Saint James stabbed his pizza with a fork. “What about you, Elder Hummel? You break any girls’ hearts by heading out on your mission?”

“No. I haven't dated many girls.” Now was the time to take his bishop’s advice, Kurt supposed. He glanced at the pairs of missionaries sitting on either side of them to see if they might be paying attention. They were happily absorbed in their own conversations, one about basketball and another about Boy Scout badges. But if they did overhear … well, it would be good practice for the rest of Kurt’s mission. He took a deep breath and straightened his spine, enunciating clearly like he was reading lines for an audition. “I have same-gender attraction.”

“Oh. What’s that? Some sort of medical condition?” The interest on Elder Saint James’s face was pronounced, but Kurt couldn’t tell if it was genuine or the feigned interest in others cultivated by perennially networking shmoozers.

Also, what was there not to understand about ‘same-gender attraction’? “You know what gender is, don’t you?”

“I know German grammar has three of them. So it’s something to do with parts of speech.”

He wasn't wrong. “It’s also called same-sex attraction. It means someone’s attracted to the same sex.”

Elder Saint James continued to look confused.

“To people of the same sex.”

No dice.

“Like … gay.”

Elder Saint James’s face lit up as if an actual light bulb head had flashed on above his head. “Oh, fascinating. I didn't know gay guys could go on a mission. Good for you.” He seemed sincere.

“We just have to follow the same rules as every other missionary. Keep the law of chastity, no flirting, no dating.”

“But what about ... attraction, as you called it? If you feel attraction, will you have to leave?”

“Feelings aren’t a sin. Just dwelling on them.”

“Oh, good. Otherwise, the next week will be a nightmare for you.” Elder Saint James shook his head slowly in what looked like it was meant to be a hair toss, but his hair was too short to move much. “I'm irresistible to women, so I assume it would be the same for anyone attracted to men. I'll do my best to tone down my magnetism, though it is a natural gift, so … I completely understand if you fall for me.”

Kurt was definitely not going to fall for this guy. But he tried not to bristle too much at Elder Saint James’s vanity. At least he wasn't repulsed by Kurt. That was a good sign. “You’ll be okay. I'm not attracted to you.”

Elder Saint James frowned. The news was clearly a blow to his ego. “Well, I wouldn’t be offended if you were attracted to me. I’ve been around it before.”

“Oh?” Kurt said. But it made sense—Hollywood and all.

“Did you do the church’s 12-step sex addiction program?”

Weird turn. But maybe not. Mormons weren’t the most astute people when it came to understanding what it meant to be gay. And this guy seemed as dumb as a bag of bricks. “No. I’ve never had sex. I follow the church’s teachings.”

“You can be a virgin and still think you’re a sex addict. At least, that’s what they said in the sex addiction group. We had lots of gay virgins there. And I’m a virgin too, of course, but I was sent there.”

Kurt felt his head spinning. He wasn’t squeamish about virginity. That was something to be proud of. It was just that his brain was about to explode, trying to hold the concept of someone being a virgin and a sex addict at the same time. “I’m sorry. I’m not following. How can you be addicted to sex when you don’t have it?”

“My bishop sent me there for porn addiction.”

Oh. Kurt swallowed uncomfortably. Porn was something he’d heard plenty of warnings about in elder’s quorum, but it always seemed like a vague, distant threat to him, something committed by the desperate and depraved, not by everyday people. He'd never looked at porn, never had an interest in doing so. Sure, he’d snuck guilty peaks at men’s bodies in art history books, but actual porn? Just hearing the word made him feel dirty. Lust was a sin next to murder.

It didn't compute. If Elder Saint James had strayed that far from the gospel, how could the church possibly put him forward to represent it now? That kind of sin took years to fully repent of, didn’t it? He couldn’t possibly be worthy to serve a mission. “I … um. No judgment here, but how do you end up on a mission if you look at porn?”

“Well, it turns out that it was a bit of a misunderstanding. It wasn’t technically porn I was looking at.”

A knot formed in Kurt’s gut. Please don’t say you looked at art books.

“You look confused. Let me step back. I went to my bishop because I felt guilty about looking at show choir costume catalogs—did I mention my team won the California show choir championship every year I was in high school?”

Kurt shook his head. This kid and his resume. He was like an airheaded, deeply perverted version of Rachel Berry.

“Anyway, I told him how I kept looking at the show choir catalogs, you know, because of all the sleeveless dresses that the girls wear—and he asked if I, you know, touched myself—” Elder Saint James mouthed the last two words rather than speak them “—and, well, I had to tell the truth. So he sent me to this sex addiction group. Only,” Elder Saint James leaned across the table, dropping his voice to a whisper, “talking about nothing but porn for an hour every week, and then going through the exercises in the workbook and thinking about porn the rest of the week … It got worse. So I went back to my bishop. By then, the bishop was a new guy, and younger, and when I confessed to him about my addiction and how it was getting worse, and he asked me how many times I've … you know … to the show choir catalogs, and I told him. And he said I was not a sex addict. I was just a teenager who needed to learn self-discipline. Which … not easy at first, but every time I’m tempted I just take all that energy and redirect it into acting exercises. No Twelve Steps needed.”

It was a lot to take in. Kurt had never gotten used to people talking about these things, despite all the raunchy chitchat he’d sat through in glee club and locker rooms throughout high school. “I assume your aborted membership in a Twelve Step sex addiction group is not one of the three things I should be sharing about you.”

Elder Saint James waved a piece of pizza on the end of his fork. “I try to be an open book, because then the paparazzi can’t get anything on you later, but … It’s probably not the right message for this stage. And what about your condition? Is that just between companions?”

Kurt’s stomach flip-flopped. “No. I mean, I don’t think it’s necessary to announce it to everyone, but it’s not a secret. The mission president knows. And it's not a condition, either. It's just part of who I am. Like having blue eyes.”

Elder Saint James peered at him. “I don't know. Your eyes are more blue-green. Aquamarine, maybe?”

Kurt flushed. He really wasn’t attracted to Elder Saint James, but he also wasn't used to having his eye color scrutinized by other young men. “Bluish eyes, then. I was born with bluish eyes. There are bad things and good things about it. People with blue eyes are more sensitive to light and, when I get older, I’ll have a higher risk for macular degeneration. But blue eyes aren’t a disease or something that needs to be changed. They just are. And same-sex attraction is the same. It has drawbacks. But it’s also brought me closer to God. It makes me rely on the Holy Ghost more, because I can’t just follow the map laid out in the plan of salvation. Not all of it, anyway.”

Elder Saint James chewed thoughtfully on a bite of pizza. “Can I ask you a question?”

In Kurt's experience, people only said that when they were about to ask something they shouldn’t. But he couldn't exactly say no. That was the whole point of their lunch, to ask each other questions. “Shoot.”

“If it's not a condition, if having same-sex attraction isn’t something you’re trying to fix, then why use that term at all? Why don't you just call yourself gay?”

Kurt was thrown for a loop. He had expected a much dumber question, or possibly something offensive. This was the opposite. “I do, sometimes. It’s just … same-sex attraction sounds more appropriate in a church context, don’t you think?”

Elder Saint James shook his head. “Nah, it sounds like an illness. I wouldn't say I have opposite-sex attraction in a church context or out of it. It sounds so … clinical. Like I need to go to the dentist or a twelve-step group to have it fixed. I’d just call myself straight if I had to call myself anything.”

It was, perhaps, the most erudite thing Elder Saint James said during their companionship. Maybe that's why Kurt thought about it so often. At night when the snores of the missionaries in the neighboring bunks kept him awake, Elder Saint James’s words would worm through his brain: “Why don’t you just call yourself gay?”

Kurt could probably count on his hand the number of times he had said that word out loud to describe himself. He'd mouthed it in the mirror a few times, trying it on like a new shirt. He'd used it with his dad when he'd come out, and he'd used it with his bishop. But all the church literature used same-gender attraction or same-sex attraction. And the apostles warned against making your sexuality the center of your identity. Kurt had worried that using the term gay would wash out the more important parts of who he was: son, brother, creator, friend, child of God.

But Elder Saint James was right. It sounded like something that would diminish through time or through treatment, like a twisted ankle or grief. It led to embarrassing prayers in elders’ quorum for those who “suffer same-sex attraction” the same way they would pray for those “suffering sickness”—even though it wasn’t the attraction that caused the suffering, but was fighting against it. (Kurt suffered less than he used to because he had learned not to fight it. If his heart skipped a beat at a boy’s sympathetic smile, he let himself feel it. He just didn’t dwell on it. He let the feeling go. Because that was the other thing that caused suffering—wanting things he couldn’t have.)

Kurt requested a meeting with the MTC president.

“Are you doing all right, Elder Hummel? None of the other missionaries are giving you trouble, are they?”

“No, President Kimball.” That wasn't exactly true. There was that boy from rural Idaho who'd made fun of his voice and asked him if he was a queer, but Kurt had dressed him down so severely with a pastiche of conference talk quotes and his own biting sarcasm that he didn't think that particular kid would be a problem again. “I just want to talk to you about something that's in my file. About …” Ugh. It was so embarrassing to cough this phrase up to a man who was older than disco. “Same-sex attraction.”

“Oh.” President Kimball looked worried. “Are you having temptations?”

“No. Not at all.” Not even remotely, Kurt realized when he stopped to think about it. He was so busy with classes and study and scheduled recreation and exactly eight hours for sleep every night that he didn't have time to think about boys, even as he was surrounded by them. “I just … my bishop, before I came here, he said I should inform my companions. To avoid misunderstandings, you know? And so they can offer support.”

“I think that's wise, when done at the appropriate moment. It's good to share your struggles.”

“Well, I was just wondering … I mentioned it to my companion because he was asking about girlfriends—”

“I hope he doesn’t have any.”

“Past girlfriends, I mean. So I told him. But he didn't understand what same-gender attraction was. Or same-sex attraction. So I finally just explained it was like being gay. But … is that okay? To use the word ‘gay’ on my mission?”

President Kimball leaned back in his chair. “I haven't always been comfortable with that word. It denotes a certain … pride, I suppose, and we all know pride’s a sin. And I think for some people, it can become an identity. It defines who they are. And that’s not good, either. But I suppose that just because some people misuse it doesn't mean it's off limits. I noticed recently the church is even using it in some places on its website. And I suppose that’s because, in the church, we strive to use language that people understand, no matter what walk of life they’re from. That's part of why you're here at the MTC: to learn how to speak to investigators in a way they can understand, so they become open to the message of the gospel. So if using a specific term helps people understand what you’re trying to tell them, then it's fine. As long as you understand that it’s not your identity. It’s just one of the many challenges facing you on your mortal probation. Your true identity is as a child of Heavenly Father.”

By the time Kurt arrived in Germany, he had memorized a new approach: “I'm Elder Hummel, I'm from Ohio, I come from pioneer stock on my mom's side and my dad was a convert. I was born in the covenant, my favorite ice cream flavor is Ben and Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk, and my favorite high school extracurricular was glee club. And if you think that sounds gay, you'd be right. I am. Will that be a problem?” Kurt glared sternly at Elder Weston, his new senior companion, a broad-shouldered, chisel-faced New Yorker who was twenty-one but looked closer to thirty.

“Wow, kid. You’ve really got to learn to chill out.” Elder Weston laughed and patted Kurt heartily on the back like he was a golden retriever who’d just done a cute trick. “For starters, you don’t need to include your name in your introduction because I already know. It was in the notice and I can read your nametag. But let’s see … You already know I’m Elder Weston, I’m from New York, I have pioneer ancestors but I was not born in the covenant—long story, a little scandalous, mostly boring, let’s just say my dad was all set to go on his mission and had to get married instead, and I’m here to make it all up to the grandparents—and I’m not really into ice cream because of those freezer headaches. But the missionaries who like it rave about the gelateria on Theresienstraße, so we’ll hit it on P-day if we don’t make it before. I wasn’t in glee club but I was in musical theater, so close enough, and I’m not gay, but if you are? Good. You do you. And if any of the missionaries give you crap about it, tell me. My brother back home is gay, and I raised the money for my mission by being a fitness and underwear model, so with all that and show choir—I assume that’s why the mission president put us together.”

“Oh,” was all that Kurt could think to say. The wind had been completely blown out of his sails. Except— “Underwear model? Isn’t that … Your bishop was okay with that?”

Elder Weston shrugged. “It was before I went to the temple. And I wasn’t modeling butt-floss. Just regular old underwear, the occasional ugly jock strap. Which, frankly, is the world’s loss.”

Just because Elder Weston was fine with the gay thing did not mean their companionship was easy. They were both opinionated, but usually on the opposite end of any spectrum. Elder Weston met the minimum requirements of the missionary routine, but he was nearing the end of his two years and Kurt could tell he already had one foot out the door. The only things you were supposed to read on your mission were the Scriptures and relevant readings from the Gospel Library, but Elder Weston had picked up a little blue paperback of short stories by some guy named Thomas Mann and was burying his nose in it every night before bed. He was blasé about the schedule, sometimes sleeping in as late as 7:15 instead of getting up by 6:30 like they were supposed to. He spent half of companionship scripture study talking about his life as a model and show choir star. (He reminded Kurt a bit of Elder Saint James.) He left his dirty dishes to soak in a tub on the kitchen counter until the next meal. He didn’t rinse all his hair out of the sink when he shaved.

And Kurt had no way of getting away from this guy. The mission rules stated that you could never leave your companion alone. You needed to be with them 24-7. Kurt had heard horror stories of some senior companions who took the rule so literally they made you leave the door open when you used the bathroom so they could make sure you weren’t up to any mischief in there. Elder Weston didn’t do that—his only redeeming quality, in Kurt’s mind—and maybe he wouldn’t have cared if Kurt had wandered off on his own. But a rule was a rule, and Kurt felt compelled to stick with it. He had to buckle up and accept it all because he was a greenie and Elder Weston was his senior companion.

At least they didn't live alone. They shared their apartment with another companionship, Elder Sterling and Elder Duval, who served as a buffer. They were both closer to the midpoint of their missions—Elder Sterling had been out for eight months, and Elder Duval for fourteen—and while they had no control over Elder Weston’s training style, Elder Duval had no compunction about chewing Elder Weston out for dirty dishes and disgusting sinks. Or at least, that's what it sounded like he was doing. Kurt's German wasn't very good yet, and trying to understand the language through Elder Duval's French accent was enough to make his head ache.

Kurt didn’t think he could have a senior companion less invested in his mission than Elder Weston. And then The Thing happened.

It came two weeks into their companionship and three weeks before Elder Weston was scheduled to return home. Munich’s supposedly mild late summer took a turn for the scorching. The apartment was even hotter than outside, thanks to their top floor location, no air-conditioning, no electric fans, and windows that only opened halfway. At night as he tried to sleep, Kurt’s supposedly wicking nylon garments stuck unpleasantly to his thighs and crotch, and when he switched to the cotton ones, they became heavy from sweat. It didn’t help at all that Kurt couldn’t fall asleep without the reassuring weight of a blanket over his legs.

“Screw this,” Elder Weston murmured sometime in the middle of the second night, waking Kurt and everyone else out of their miserably light slumber. Kurt heard bare feet slap the floor, then impatient fumbling.

“Elder Weston, you can’t do that!” shouted Elder Duval in German.

Kurt leaned over to see what was happening. Elder Duval had jumped out of his bottom bunk and was grabbing at something on the floor. Elder Weston was … buck naked.

There wasn’t that much light in the room, but Kurt could clearly make out his bare butt in the dark. Fortunately, Kurt was not new to bare butts—he’d had to ignore them in locker rooms for years and the MTC shower room for eight weeks. Elder Weston’s butt was okay, but surprisingly unappealing given he’d been an underwear model.

Elder Duval thrust something—no, things, two pieces of bunched up fabric—into Elder Weston’s hands. “You can’t throw your garments on the floor.”

“I just did,” Elder Weston said.

“Put them back on. Remember your covenants.”

“‘Members who have made covenants in the temple should be guided by the Holy Spirit to answer for themselves personal questions about wearing the garment.’” At least, that’s what Kurt thought Elder Weston said. He didn’t understand all the German words, but he’d read similar phrases in English often enough to fill in the blanks. “And the Holy Spirit tells me I need to be able to sleep.”

“Then pray for sleep. I was asleep in my garments before you woke me up. You can sleep in your garments, too.”

Elder Weston responded with something Kurt didn’t understand, but it sounded defiant. Elder Duval said something else Kurt didn’t understand. It sounded angrily resigned.

The battle continued the next morning, when Elder Weston showed up to breakfast the same way he’d spent the night—naked as the day he was born. This was so outside of Kurt’s realm of the possible that it took him several seconds to realize what he was seeing. At first, it was just a pale canvas with a … thing … bouncing around under a dark stripe of hair, like Snuffleupagus’s trunk swinging under heavy eyebrows. And then—

Oh. The realization hit him. Kurt adjusted the cereal box to block his view, but the image of Snuffleupagus—the actual Snuffleupagus, not Elder Weston’s penis—remained. Why had Kurt ever, in his most heated and embarrassing dreams, ever thought he might enjoy one of those in his mouth?

“I’ve had enough of stupid mission rules and I’m not ashamed of the body God gave me and it’s so hot in here I would take my skin off too if I could,” Elder Weston announced as he grabbed the cornflakes from in front of Kurt’s face and sat his bare butt down in one of the plastic kitchen chairs. He repeated himself in English for Kurt’s sake.

“I know what you said.” Well, everything except the part about taking off his own skin, which Kurt would have preferred not to be explained. It was even grosser than the idea of Snuffleupagus in his mouth.

“Good,” Elder Weston said proudly, as if it were just a normal day of training and not one that began with a naked missionary at breakfast.

“It can’t be comfortable to sit your naked butt on plastic,” Kurt said in English. Elder Sterling whispered a translation to Elder Duval.

“You’d be surprised.”

Kurt ate his breakfast in silence while Elder Duval and Elder Sterling teamed up to lecture Elder Weston. For Kurt’s part, it was too hot to fight and, anyway, he didn’t have the authority to argue with his superiors. Such things might not stop Kurt outside of the church, but within the church, obedience was an opportunity for growth. Besides, Kurt was rather enjoying the fact that he was sitting at breakfast with a naked young man and nothing, nothing at all, was stirring downstairs. Kurt’s patriarchal blessing had promised gifts and miracles on his mission, and in the North Star chat groups he’d read stories of gay missionaries who had their attractions lifted for the length of their mission, removed through the blessing of the Holy Ghost so they could focus on the work. Kurt didn’t feel not gay, but he certainly felt not interested in Elder Weston’s naked body. It was heavenly.

If only Elder Weston had stopped there. But no. It became a routine. Every morning it was the same: Kurt moving the cereal box so he didn’t have to see Snuffleupagus at breakfast. And Kurt tired of it. He was sick of Elder Weston’s junk on the furniture. He was sick of Elder Duval constantly reminding Elder Weston of his covenants to no avail. He was sick of living with someone who flouted his covenants. He was sick of having to remember which kitchen chair was the naked-butt chair. And he was sick of having a senior companion who didn’t care.

This was Kurt’s mission, for goodness sake. He’d waited and worked for it his whole life. These two years were supposed to give him the discipline he needed to thrive in the church, the spiritual nourishment to sustain him as he endured to the end. And Elder Weston didn’t care. He was wasting the precious days of Kurt’s mission on his own selfishness.

“You do realize I’m gay, don’t you?” Kurt finally spat out in frustration on the fifth consecutive morning of Weston nudity.

“Yeah. So what?” Elder Weston said, reaching for the cornflakes.

“So, aren’t you worried I’ll check out your junk?”

Elder Sterling did a spit-take, his orange juice flying backward from his mouth into his glass. Upon recovering, he politely translated for Elder Duval, whose eyes went wide.

“No,” Elder Weston answered confidently. “You’re not attracted to me.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yeah, I do. I’ve spent a lot of time in gyms and musical theater. I’ve been checked out by guys before. And you … For some reason, you’re not interested in this pillar of perfection.” Elder Weston flexed his pecs.

Kurt balked. “Stop that. You’re grossing me out.”

“Me, too,” Elder Sterling chimed in.

“See? No harm, no foul.”

“Auf Deutsch, bitte,” said Elder Duval.

Elder Weston reluctantly repeated himself for Elder Duval’s benefit.

“There is harm,” said Elder Duval in German. “To you. It’s sexual impropriety. You’re disrespecting your body and you’re disrespecting us. Waving your snake in our faces when we've all told you we don’t want to see it. Waving your snake in our faces at all.”

“Echt,” agreed Kurt. The gears in his head began to turn. He peered at Elder Weston. “Wenn ich den Missiondpräsident anruf, und ihn sage, dass du …” Wait. Was it sage or säge? Should he have held the verb until after the dass clause? Should he have said ruf an? Ugh. He couldn’t do this in German. Elder Duval could forgive him later. “Elder Weston, if I went to the mission president with a sob story about my companion trying to test me—a poor, weak homosexual who only ever tried to do the right thing—he’s going to come down on my side.” Kurt wasn’t sure about this, but he delivered it with enough conviction that he persuaded even himself it was probably true. “Sexual impropriety could get you sent home early from your mission. What would the folks back home think of that?” Kurt remembered what Elder Weston had said on the first day about being born outside the covenant and went for the jugular. It would be messy, but it would be the fastest way to end things. “The boy born out of the covenant getting sent home early when he was so close to making it to the end? The fruit born of his parents’ inability to keep it in their pants? You, a failed missionary, just like your father?” Wow, it felt good to say those things after almost three weeks of pointless obedience. Adrenaline spilled through Kurt’s veins.

Elder Weston’s face turned purple. “You’re an asshole, Elder Hummel. A self-righteous prig who doesn’t have any idea what he’s talking about. You’d think someone gay would be less judgmental.”

Kurt shrugged, aiming for casual and failing because every muscle in his limbs shook from righteous anger. “I’m not judging. Just pointing out that other people do.”

Elder Weston stomped off into the bedroom and slammed the door.

“You went too far, Elder Hummel,” Elder Sterling said. “You’re going to have to apologize.”

Once he’d had it translated to him, Elder Duval agreed.

A violent thunderstorm tore through Munich later that morning, breaking the heat wave. They stayed home because of that, and then because Elder Weston was too angry to look at Kurt, and then because Elder Weston just didn’t feel like going.

Elders Sterling and Duval told them if they didn’t hold an impromptu companionship inventory, they would put them both on permanent toilet-cleaning duty.

So now they were sitting across from each other in the kitchen, Elder Weston’s butt planted in his naked parts chair. Only this time, he had clothes on.

Elder Weston launched things off with a scowl. “You shouldn't use your sexuality as a weapon.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Kurt. He didn’t want to hear any of it. Elder Weston was the one in the wrong here.

“Threatening to call up the mission president and complain that I need to be sent home because I’m trying to tempt you. When we both know I’m not interested and neither are you.”

Oh. That. “I could say the same thing about you. Using sexuality as a weapon.”

“No, you couldn’t.”

“Right. Of course. Repeatedly strutting naked around the apartment when all your roommates beg you not to isn’t a misuse of your sexuality.”

“First, please don’t use sarcasm in companionship inventory. It’s not conducive to the Spirit. Second: no. The bare body isn't inherently sexual. It's just a biological fact.”

Who was Elder Naked to tell Kurt how to talk? Kurt wasn’t the one breaking his covenants. “I'm pretty sure For the Strength of Youth and every living and dead apostle would differ with you on that. If the bare body isn't inherently sexual, then why do girls have to cover their shoulders at church dances? Modesty and virtue are core principles of the gospel.”

“Also? That self-righteous tone has got to go, Elder Hummel. I mean, I get where it comes from. I’m sure it’s come in handy through the years of having to defend your right to exist in a church that pretends you don’t. But I’m not going to attack you for who you are.”

“The church doesn’t pretend—” No, Kurt couldn’t really support that argument. He switched tacks. “Don’t bring the church into this.”

“I kind of have to, Elder Hummel. That’s why we’re fighting.”

“We’re fighting because nobody but you wants your naked butt on our kitchen chairs.”

Elder Weston sighed. “We’re fighting because you guys are freaked out about howI live my temple covenants. And because you’ve all heard the modesty talks so many times you can’t think like rational human beings. Like, if I can take off my garments to go swimming or take a shower, then why can’t I take them off when it’s boiling hot outside? God just wants me to sweat in them until I get jock itch?”

Kurt wrinkled his nose.

“What if that’s all just cultural? What if that doesn’t have anything to do with God? I mean, how do you know if the cart is leading the horse or the other way around, Elder Hummel? Do we cover certain parts of our bodies because they’re sexual, or do sexualize certain parts of our bodies because we cover them?”

Kurt took a deep breath. “Elder Weston, it’s clear you are mentally checked out of this mission, possibly this church. I’m sorry about that, but it’s not my fault, and it’s not fair for you to take that out on me or the other guys.”

“Maybe not. I just—I’ve spent the last two years telling everyone I meet that I have the truth and if they just listen to me, they can have it, too. And I had my doubts all along, but I just kept stuffing them down because my family expects this of me. And I kept turning to the scriptures hoping to find answers, but they make it worse. The Book of Abraham says black skin is a curse. The Book of Mormon is full of people murdering each other, and not just the bad guys—Nephi’s supposed to be a hero, but he chops off Laban’s head while he’s passed out drunk just to get his hands on some gold plates that he loses as soon as he gets to the Americas. And the church—it takes this beautiful world that God created and makes it corrupt by labeling every natural thing as sinful. I can’t be naked, you can’t fall in love, none of us can read great literature or go to the opera in the country where Richard Wagner was born.”

Wait. Was Elder Weston implying that the possibility of Kurt falling in love with another man was beautiful? Natural? How could that be? His being gay was natural—the Holy Ghost had confirmed it to him—but falling in love? That hadn’t been Kurt’s experience, the one time he’d thought he was in love. It was painful and uncomfortable and awkward. What did this crotchety straight guy see that Kurt didn’t?

So Kurt skipped that part and focused on the last thing Elder Weston had said. “We can read great books. Now just isn’t the time. In a few weeks, you can read as much great German literature as you want.”

Elder Weston nodded. “Maybe.” He paused. “Can I give you some advice, Elder Hummel?”

“Isn't that your job as a trainer?”

“Wow. You really don’t know how to stop being sarcastic, do you?” Elder Weston took off the watch he wore on his left wrist. It was a classic-looking number with a cream face, gold frame, and gold hands. “My grandad gave this to me before I went on my mission. He wore it on his mission. He said he'd been holding onto it for years, but I'd been too young to have it. You know why? Not because it's worth money. It’s really not. But because it’s a wind-up watch. It doesn’t have a battery. You have to wind it every day so it can keep time. Winding it tightens a spring inside, and over the day the spring relaxes, and it transfers all that energy from being wound up really tight to the rest of the gears. So you need to make sure to wind it up or there won’t be enough energy. But if you’re too gung-ho about it, you know what happens?”

Kurt felt like he should know. It was mechanical, like the older cars he’d worked on in his dad’s tire shop. Also, hadn't he gotten an A in physics? But he drew a blank. “No, I don't know.” They were among Kurt's least favorite words to say.

“If you wind a spring too tight, it pops. The metal is under too much stress and somewhere along the coil, it literally breaks. And it can’t be fixed. The spring is useless. It won’t work anymore. That’s what’ll happen if I wind this too tight. And that’s what I’m worried is going to happen to you if you keep going the way you’re going, Elder.”

“And how is it that I’m going?”

Elder Weston let out a huff of frustration. “Look. It's obvious you like the rules. They give you structure. They give you comfort. But not everything is written in a rulebook. And sometimes the rules … you grow up thinking that they cover all the bases, but they don't. There are a lot of gray areas, Elder Hummel. That's why we have free agency. So use yours. And let other people do the same. It's like with the plan of Salvation. God listened to Jesus’ plan where everyone would think on their own, and he listened to Satan’s plan, where everyone would follow the rules without thinking. God chose Jesus’s plan, even though it meant that we all would be able to make mistakes, and some of us would stray away from him. Heavenly Father decided we could all go off and do our own things, whether he liked it or not. I think we need to emulate that in our own lives with other people, you know? First, because it's the right thing to do, and second, because you will literally go crazy if you get enraged every time someone breaks a rule, or something you think is a rule.”

“I don’t get enraged.” Not every time. Maybe with Elder Weston, because he was in Kurt’s face and under his feet 24-7, and the accumulation of grievances was relentless. But not with people he could take a break from. With them it was more … simmering anger.

“You have a long two years ahead of you if you don't learn how to give leeway to other people, Elder Hummel. You're going to have a lot of missionary companions, and you probably won't like most of them. At least not at first. And maybe … maybe that’s the lesson I’ve been trying to give you as your senior companion. I admit, a lot of it’s been self-centered, but you coming in that first day with your pioneer heritage and born in the covenant stuff, and angry about being gay—”

“I'm not angry about being gay.”

“You literally glared at me and asked if I had a problem with it. If you're not angry about being gay, you're angry about what people think about you, or what you think they're going to think. And what's the difference in the end? You don’t come across as happy in the skin God gave you, in any case.”

It felt like some kind of rhetorical trick. Of course those things were different. One type of anger was futile, and the other was righteous. “It takes a Mormon to think every kind of anger is unjustified.”

Elder Weston huffed. “That’s not what I’m saying at all. I’m saying it’s not helping you. And fine, I didn’t deal with it in the best way. But as obnoxious as I am, I really want what’s best for you. I’m just at a loss as to how to make that happen.”

Kurt had some ideas in that realm, and Elder Weston actually listened. He stopped walking around the apartment naked, for one thing. And he acknowledged he wasn’t the ideal senior companion for Kurt. So they developed a schedule where Kurt paired up with Elder Duval every other day for proselytizing. Between Elder Weston’s laissez-faire attitude and Elder Duval’s zealous one, Kurt began to find a niche of his own.

By the time he took Elder Flanagan on, Kurt had developed a straightforward approach to coming out. He avoided being defensive or brash. He wanted to deliver this truth with the same matter-of-factness he might discuss the color of the sky. With Elder Flanagan, it was an hour or two into their companionship. They were walking past the Gymnasium on the way to an appointment, and the students were on morning break, milling about the schoolyard and getting into snowball fights, while a group of older girls—17, maybe 18—tracked down the sidewalk toward the nearby bakery.

Kurt was regaling Elder Flanagan with minutiae about the bus schedule and city landmarks and the characteristics of the investigators they were about to meet, when Elder Flanagan’s eyes became glued to the legs of a skinny red-haired girl in knee-high boots, red stockings, and a black mini-skirt that was so short, Kurt could barely see it peeking out beneath her faux-fur trimmed winter coat.

“Eyes on God, Elder Flanagan.”

Elder Flanagan didn’t respond. He just kept following that pair of legs down the sidewalk.

“Elder Flanagan.” Kurt cleared his throat dramatically.

“What? Oh, yes. God.” Elder Flanagan reluctantly pulled his eyes away from the girl’s legs as she disappeared around the corner. “But Elder, you did see her legs, didn’t you?”

“Yes. She must be cold with only stockings between her and the elements.”

“That's not what I meant.”

“I know. But I guess the mission president didn’t tell you. I'm not interested in girls the way you are. I'm gay. And I don't check out guys on my mission because I respect my covenants. So you can respect yours, too.”

“You’re gay?” was Elder Flanagan’s response.

“Yes.” Kurt resisted the urge to ask if Elder Flanagan had any concerns, because it implied that he should have concerns. But Kurt wanted to throw him some kind of bone. A gay companion could be a lot to take in. “I’m not attracted to missionaries, though.”

“Really? I can’t imagine how you do that. Girls—I’m attracted to, like, every single one of them.”

“I guess we all deal with different temptations. But once you’re immersed in the work, it should be easier. You start seeing people more through the Lord’s eyes than your own.”

“I hope so. I mean, a pretty face is still a pretty face—”

“It wasn’t a face you were looking at earlier, Elder Flanagan.”

Elder Flanagan burst out laughing. He clapped Kurt on the back. “I won’t get anything by you, will I, Elder Hummel?”

Kurt shook his head. “No. Not much, anyway.”

“Well, you’ll have to give me some tips. I love looking at girls, but it’s a bit much sometimes. You can only have one wife in this lifetime, so what’s the point of being distracted by them all?”

Kurt smiled. “You remind me of my brother.”

“He’s girl-crazy, too?”

“He was,” Kurt swallowed heavily. “He died.” Why had he brought Finn up? The sweet memories turned sour every time Kurt had to repeat those two words.

“I’m sorry.”

“He's in a better place now.” Talking about Finn was potentially as much of an emotional landmine as talking about being gay. Kurt dealt with it the same way. By being direct, a little closed off, and not thinking about it too much.

“Yes, of course.” Elder Flanagan looked down at the snowy sidewalk. “Anyway, thank you for telling me. On both accounts. I'm sure it's not easy.”

Kind words, but Kurt didn’t want to feel them. “What in life is? We come to earth, we have challenges, we overcome. It's all part of the plan.”

From almost the moment he met Elder Anderson, Kurt had known his new companion would accept him as he was. Elder Anderson was just that kind of person—someone who didn’t have to make a concerted effort to be like Jesus, because his natural inclination was to love. The way he'd instantly made friends with that elderly Bavarian woman on the train whose speech he couldn't even understand. How he’d glowed as he talked about taking stray cats into his home and loving them until they were healthy again—and then not even keeping most of them, but finding them new families as another act of love. His openness and generosity with investigators, withholding judgment about their errors and seeking only to understand them. Elder Anderson was a living, breathing manifestation of the 13th Article of Faith: “If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.”

So naturally he found good in Kurt—because he found good in everything. The way Elder Anderson looked at him with so much respect and admiration, as if Kurt was an actual gift to the world—who had ever looked at him like that before? Sure, Elder Anderson viewed everybody that way. But it didn't make it any less intense to be on the receiving end of his gaze.

And so, Kurt didn't tell Elder Anderson that he was gay in their first couple days together, like he had with all his previous companions. Not because he feared rejection, but because he feared acceptance. Not the kind, benevolent acceptance his previous companions had offered him, but a bone-deep embracing of everything that Kurt was.

Opportunities popped up again and again, but it never felt like the right time. Their very first day working together, Elder Anderson had misunderstood the names of a straight couple they were going to visit and thought they were two men. He didn’t seem at all fazed by the idea. But Kurt didn’t want to turn a discussion about the work into a discussion about himself. So he’d put it off until the evening. But then Elder Anderson had called him dashing in his pajamas, and you can’t tell someone you’re gay right after they compliment you like that, because then they might think you’re implying they meant something more than friendly admiration, and the whole point of Kurt telling his companions was to avoid misunderstandings, not create them. He’d thought maybe he could do it after their prayers, but Elder Anderson had been so heartfelt in thanking Heavenly Father for their companionship, it made Kurt feel raw inside. And then he’d told Kurt he loved him and given him a hug—such a routine thing for a companion to do, Kurt had become inured to it. But Elder Anderson had done it with the same sincerity with which he’d prayed. If Kurt had returned that sincerity, he would have broken.

“It’s OK that you’re in love with Mercedes,” Elder Anderson said, so innocent and kind even in his ignorance. “None of us are perfect, Elder Hummel. That’s why we’re on earth. Because we aren’t perfect, but we want to learn how to be.”

By withholding the truth any longer, Kurt would cross the bridge into dishonesty. And he couldn't do that. Not with Elder Anderson.

“I’m gay,” Kurt said, and it wasn’t at all like the times he’d said it before. It wasn’t cold or straightforward or bold or removed. It was vulnerable. Everything he'd been tamping down these two years rose to the surface, his skin tingling as it all bubbled up through him, his head spinning like a leaf being pulled down into a whirlpool. Kurt felt Elder Anderson's eyes on him, full of Christlike love, and he couldn't bear it, had to stare at the floor and the duvet cover and anything that wasn’t Elder Anderson because all his feelings would flood out otherwise. He gripped his Choose the Right ring, ran his fingers over its belt buckle embellishment, a physical reminder that he should hold himself together, that he could hold himself together, that he must.

“I’m not worried,” Elder Anderson said, and, “You don’t need to worry that I’ll love you any less,” and what an awful thing to say, because it confirmed that Elder Anderson already loved him, just like Jesus and his Heavenly Parents loved him, and that knowledge broke something inside Kurt.

“Can I—” Elder Anderson reached toward Kurt, his fingers hovering near Kurt’s forearm, tentative and tender, the way he might be toward an injured cat hiding under a bush. “Can I give you a hug, Elder Hummel?”

And Kurt must have nodded because the next thing he knew, he was wrapped up in Elder Anderson’s arms. “I’m sorry,” Kurt whispered as he sank his weight into his companion’s body. Elder Anderson was warm and solid, and his chest rose and fell against Kurt’s with each breath, and it felt so intimate, but also so safe—two feelings that Kurt had rarely known to coexist inside his heart. “I don't know why I'm getting so emotional. I never get emotional about this. I’ve said it so many times. Half the mission must know by now. And I’m not … please don’t think I’m ashamed. This is the way my Heavenly Parents made me.” Kurt’s breath was ragged and his hands were trembling.

“They made you perfectly,” Elder Anderson said slowly and with conviction, his breath brushing against Kurt's ear, sacred and warm as a confirmation from the Holy Ghost.

“I thought no one was perfect,” Kurt muttered wryly into his companion’s shoulder.

Elder Anderson made a small, sweet sound halfway between a sigh and a laugh. “Maybe. But they still made you perfectly. You’re perfectly imperfect, just the way you should be.”

You’re the worst, Kurt thought, and hugged Elder Anderson harder.

#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: zealous #wowbright writes fic #mormon!klaine #klaine fanfiction #my klaine advent 2020

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redheadgleek · 3 years

Note

It’s the holiday season, so flight attendant Blaine returns a package that a little girl accidentally left on a flight. Naturally, this leads to her spending Christmas at the girl’s house and falling in love with her dad Kurt.

“Happy Holidays!” Blaine says, smiling at the passengers, filing out of the plane. “Bye now. Thank you for flying with us! Happy holidays!”

He always enjoys flying on Christmas Eve, when everybody is so excited to be going on vacation or going home for the holidays and are usually in a good mood. The flights are filled with kids and they always ask him the most amazing questions about his job. “Do you get to go out on the wing?” One child asked him tonight and was very disappointed when he told him no. The kids had all been especially adorable and well behaved on the flight tonight. One girl, not older than five, had told him all about her first trip flying and how she wasn’t scared because her friend Drizzle the giraffe was with her. When he went through the demonstration about plane safety, he stopped to confirm that her father knew to get his own oxygen first and she made Blaine help her buckle up the giraffe in the middle seat. Her father, a stunning man near his age, wearing an artistic scarf that brought out the blue in his eyes even in the dim overhead lights, looked on with an amused smile and winked broadly at Blaine, causing him to blush madly. When he paused with the drink service at their aisle, Blaine handed him a whole can of coke, just to see that smile again. Flirting with handsome men is definitely a perk of the job.

It’s the last flight for the night and his passengers are starting to look more weary as they wrangle packages and suitcases and children out of the narrow aisles. “Whoa! Let me help you out there!” He says to the handsome man, carrying the now sleeping little girl in one arm while trying to retrieve a suitcase from the overhead compartment. He reaches up and pulls down the stuffed suitcase and a smaller monkey-shaped backpack and carries them to the front of the plane. “You think you can get it from here?”

“Thanks!” The man smiles with gratitude as he shifts his child around to grasp the suitcase more securely. “Happy Holidays.”

“You too!” He watches them make their way down the plank and then grabs the wheelchair waiting outside of the plane. “Ms. Eliza? Your carriage is here! Let’s get you tucked in.”

He waves the last of the passengers off the plane and then securely locks the bathroom door and tidies the service area.

“I am looking forward to a long bath, a massage, and a haircut.” Sugar announces as she straightens the magazines in the seat back pocket, blatantly avoiding the left behind trash. “Daddy tried to get a masseuse to come to my apartment tonight, but service in this city is just not what it used to be. So I have one booked for first thing in the morning, after my private yoga session with Cassandra.”

“You booked a yoga session and a massage on Christmas?” Blaine questions from across the aisle.

“Of course. Everything is closed that day, so they have nothing else to do.”

Blaine exchanges rolled eyes with the other flight attendant, Marley, as she follows behind Sugar and gathers the trash. No one has been able to figure out why the young socialite took a job as an attendant, as she subjects the rest of the crew to stories of her father’s wealth. But, she’ll loudly defend her coworkers where they’re subjected to any sexist behavior, reaming the men out until they meekly find their seat and add a “please” and “thank you” to any requests for the rest of the flight and Blaine knows that she gets great glee out of making them behave. Except for her tendency to avoid getting her hands dirty, she is a funny and reliable crewmate and Blaine always enjoys their cross country trips together.

“Jake is coming to my mom’s home tomorrow for breakfast.” Marley confesses.

“You’re at the ‘meet the parents’ stage already?” Sugar whistles. “Do you think he’ll propose?”

“No! That is, I don’t think so. It’s only been four months, isn’t that too soon?” Marley eyes widen.

“Much too soon,” Blaine reassures Marley. Marley has always been more reserved with her feelings and hesitant to trust in relationships and so far, Jake has been willing to take things at Marley’s pace. The two of them often shared the same flights and Blaine had shared many a midnight layover hotel room with Marley, spilling their feelings into the late night.

“What about you, Blaine? How are you spending your Christmas?” Sugar asks.

“It’s a quiet one this year, just me at home.” He answers, picking up a discarded blanket.

“You’re not seeing your family?” Marley asks.

“No. My parents are on a two week cruise to Greece and I couldn’t get that much time off. And Cooper is on one of those “spiritual” rejuvenation retreats in Palm Springs.”

“You could come with me and Jake. My mom always makes plenty.” Marley volunteers, worry in her eyes.

“Nah, really, I’m good. I ordered food from the little Italian restaurant down the block and I’m going to watch all of the Christmas movies and drink hot chocolate. It’s going to be a lovely day.”

“If you’re sure.” Marley acquiesces hesitantly.

“I’m sure.” Blaine smiles. Sugar moves on to other topics and Marley drops the subject. As the much younger child of very busy parents, he was used to spending the holidays alone and while he was grateful for Marley’s offer, the awkwardness of sharing Christmas with strangers isn’t appealing either.

They’re nearing the tail of the plane, scooping up the last of the cans and cups from the drink service, along with two cell phones and one credit card that had been left in the seat pocket. “Oh no!” Blaine says, spotting the large stuffed giraffe lovingly buckled and forgotten in one of the middle seats. “One of the kids left one of their toys.”

“Aww, that’s so cute. Somebody is going to be missing their friend tonight.”

“Want me to run it up to the service department?” Sugar says. “I’m all done here.”

“Nah,” Blaine says, thinking about the little girl and her excitement about the giraffe. “I’ve got to submit the safety check report. I can turn in the stuffed animal and the phones with it.”

“Suit yourself. Laters, hoes!” Sugar calls as she departs the plane.

Blaine waits while Marley latches the last of the cabinets and follows her up to the front, where they retrieve their coats and scarves from the small closet in first class, listening while she talks about trying to do a non Christian focused celebration on Christmas. “He’s Jewish and while he says he doesn’t mind celebrating Christmas, I want him to feel part of the celebration, you know? It’s okay to serve latkes if it’s not Hanukkah, right? My mom is making homemade applesauce tonight. She’s as nervous as I am, I think.”

“It’s going to be fine. He’s going to love that you’re making the gesture to make him comfortable with your family.”

“I hope so. I think… I think I might tell him that I love him.” She confesses as she pushes through the security gates.

“That’s great! Marley, I’m so happy for you.”

“I’m happy for me too.” She blushes. “I wish, that is, are you happy, Blaine?”

“Me?” He blinks, “what? I’m fine.”

“Are you though? It’s not just Christmas, Blaine. It’s been a long time since you’ve even mentioned dating or anything.”

“I’ve been busy.” He brushes off her concerns with a reassuring smile.

“You’ve been volunteering for extra shifts! I had to convince you not to take the Christmas shifts because you’ve worked the last 3 Christmases.”

“I… other people need that time off more.”

“It’s okay to take time for you too.” She squeezes his arm. “Come home with me tomorrow. I’d love for you to meet Jake.”

He stops them in front of the terminal doors, clutching the giraffe closer. “That’s kind of you, Mar, but-”

“Just think about it, okay? I’ll call you tomorrow.” She hugs him tightly and kisses his cheek, waving as she heads off to the parking garage.

Blaine winds his way upstairs to the Alaska airline offices, where he munches on some Christmas cookies, before making his way to Sue’s office to drop off the paperwork. She’s harassing one of the desk agents and it looks like it’ll take away, so he loses himself in his thoughts, thinking about what Marley had said. Yes, he’s been working more recently, but he wouldn’t call himself lonely. He’s good friends with many of the pilots and flight attendants and will usually get a drink with the group on their layover nights. And while he’ll admit a little envy of those happily partnered, he’s also become quite comfortable and accepting of his single life. His relationship with his college boyfriend had fizzled into nothing and he was more lonely then those first few months after graduation when he realized that they had nothing in common than he is now surrounded by his chosen family. He’s gotten good at suppressing his fantasies of love at first sight, where you just know in an instant that you’re going to be together with that special person forever. That hasn’t happened yet and likely won’t ever happen, the realist in him acknowledges.

“Did the amount of gel you use leech into your skull and eat your brain? Or do you just waste my time for fun?” Sue Sylvester, the intimidating desk agent barks and Blaine snaps back to attention.

“Sorry, Sue. Here’s the flight status report.” Blaine hurries over to her desk.

“You sure you filled this out correctly? I will relish calling you back at 3 this morning to fix it if it isn’t. I don’t care that it is Christmas.” She sneers, as she pulls the papers over to her.

“Doubled checked, like always,” Blaine assures her with a charming smile. He’s determined to win her over and he swears he sees a small smile before she grimaces again.

“Hrrphm.” She tosses the papers on a pile.

“There were a couple of phones left on the flight as well. Oh and one of the kids left this little guy behind.” He waves the giraffe’s leg at her.

“That would explain the panicked phone calls and the hysterical crying. Well throw it on the pile there. That gross … thing ... will need to be incinerated.”

He stares at her. “We aren’t going to try to return it?”

“Do I look like a delivery boy to you?”

“No, but-”

“No buts, shaven, gay, Tom Selleck. I don’t have time nor interest to find somebody to return items to dumb children who leave their precious germ-ridden slobbery death traps on planes.”

“I can take it to them.” Blaine offers.

“Now why would you want to do that?” She stares at him.

“It’s Christmas.” He shrugs. “I bet they’re missing it, if they called about it. Did you get an address?”

“Becky may have written something down. I’m not paying you extra.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to. Thanks, Sue.”

***

The address Becky had provided was on the opposite side of the city from where he lived and it had started to snow, making him question his generosity. He carefully maneuvered his little car over the slickened roads as the snow blustered across the and down a long, dark driveway before pulling up in front of a cozy white house, lined with blue and white Christmas lights. He double checks the address before buttoning his coat and tucking the little giraffe under his arm to protect it from the flurrying snow.

Lights are glowing from the front window, but nobody responds at first to his knock. He knocks again and is about to leave, contemplating leaving the stuffed animal on the porch, when the door flies open, the light silhouetting a tall man. Kurt was his name, Becky had told him.

“Hello?”

“Hi, I’m Blaine from Alaska Airlines.” He starts.

“Oh my god, did you find Drizzle? The woman on the phone made it sound like it was a lost cause.”

“This is Drizzle, yes?” He holds out the giraffe.

“Yes! Oh, gosh, thank you so much. Audrey was so heartbroken. I don’t think she would have slept tonight without him.”

Blaine smiles widely. “It’s my pleasure.” The porch light more fully illuminates the man’s attractive features and confirms that the man indeed was the handsome man he had flirted with briefly. Working with a constant stream of passengers that he greets daily means that he’s always has a sense of déjà vu when passing people in public, but this man is .... memorable and familiar and comfortable - Blaine has a deep sense that this is not their first meeting, even though that’s impossible.

Kurt straightens, his face haloed by the porch lights. “Wait, weren’t you our flight attendant? You were, right? You helped me with our luggage.”

“Yeah, that was me. I found Drizzle when I was cleaning up the plane.”

“And you brought him all the way out here? In this blizzard?”

Blane rubs his neck and blushes. “Yeah.”

“Well, thank you again. Audrey! Audrey!” He calls through the open door. “Come see what Mr -” He pauses, looking at Blaine expectedly.

“Blaine.”

“-Mr. Blaine has brought.”

He hears the clattering of feet. “What, Unca Kurt, what, is it Santa?”

Uncle. Interesting, Blaine thought. “No, not Santa. But remember that nice attendant? He found you something.”

She claps her hands and reaches out for the toy. “Drizzle! You found him!”

“You gotta be careful with your toys, honey.” The man ruffles her hair fondly. “What do you say to the nice man?”

“Thanks, Mr. Blaine.” She hugs Blaine quickly, surprising him, and runs off clutching the giraffe tightly.

“Really, thank you.” The man says again. “I can’t tell you how much this means to me and to Audrey. It was already going to be a hard Christmas. Her mom is in the hospital because of a high risk pregnancy and I promised I’d care for her for a couple of weeks, but you know how it is when you’re young. It doesn’t matter the reasons why; she just thinks her mom is abandoning her. So losing the toy was just the cap to a really trying day.”

“It’s not a problem.” Blaine reassures him, yearning to reach out a hand in comfort.

“Kurt, I mean, my name is Kurt. Would you come in and I could get you a drink?” The man asks him, gesturing to the open door.

Blaine shakes his head a little ruefully, not really wanting to leave. “No, I, I gotta go, the snow and all. But, uh, Merry Christmas, and … yeah.”

Blaine doesn’t think he’s imagining the slight forlorn frown that crosses Kurt’s face. “Oh. Yeah, you’re probably right.” He bites his lip. “Merry Christmas to you too, Blaine.”

The snow is coming down hard now, thick flakes sticking to his hair and eyelashes, and already there’s a couple of inches accumulated on the street. He opens the door, turns on his car, and his wheels spin and squeal in the snow.

He tries again, pushing firmer on the gas pedal. The car rocks forward a couple of inches and slides promptly into the ditch.

He’s stuck.

Blaine knocks meekly on the door again and this time it’s only a few seconds before the door opens. “I. My car is stuck, I think.”

Kurt’s smile is breathtaking. “That’s a pity. Would you like to come in and wait out the storm?”

Something inside of Blaine feels like he’s come home. “I’d like that.” He answers and steps through the door.

(Click for part 2)

#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: meet #i have been trying to write this story for AGES #and kept getting stuck #merry christmas eve everybody #thanks again for the prompts Pam!#this is barely edited because i wanted to post while it's still christmas eve #spaceorphan18 #fic series: eyes meeting over the noise #redheadgleek writes

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klaineadvent · 3 years

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Happy 10th Anniversary...

...if you’re looking for a little inspiration.

(gifs by @miasswier )

#klaine advent 2020 #10 years of klaine #baby it’s cold outside

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gleekto · 3 years

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Fic: Unsolicited Advice (24/24)

Summary: Blaine and Kurt are 22 and living in New York City. Blaine is in a stale relationship. Kurt likes to have his bachelor fun. They haven’t met yet.

Just your standard coffee shop meet cute…but in a drugstore, in the condom aisle.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23

**Full fic to be posted in the next day on AO3 - Will reblog with links. Enjoy!

Unsolicited Advice - Part 24 - Zealous (Kurt POV)

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and it appears to be true because Blaine insisted that they have a first official date the following weekend - six days later - without seeing each other during the whole next week. “It’s more romantic that way,” Blaine said on the phone when Kurt was less than enthused about waiting five more days. “We both have exams, and do you really want our first date to be overshadowed by the stress of studying and all that? Better to be done for the holidays.”

Kurt begrudgingly agreed and his now very fond heart is ready to leave the truly lovely little Greenwich Village Italian restaurant that Blaine chose for dinner, and get back to his apartment so he can show Blaine just how very fond he is.

“Just one last stop,” Blaine says as they walk up from the subway and along the blocks in their neighbourhood. “For old times sake.” Kurt is about to protest because frankly he has other plans for dessert than one last stop, until Blaine turns left and into the always showstoppingly romantic Duane Reade.

“You’re kidding, right?” But Kurt admits it’s kind of funny. And kind of romantic.

“It’s where we met,” Blaine says as he takes Kurt’s hand and pulls him inside to the fluorescent lights and Christmas carol playlist on loop. “And besides, we’re going to need more condoms soon.”

Kurt can’t really argue with that.

When they get to their favourite family planning aisle, Kurt laughs at the irony that another cute guy, about their age, is standing in the deodorant section next to the condoms, and of course, blocking his view of the necessary items. He’s a blondie though.

“Oh my god,” Blaine shakes his head. “Sam?”

Sam turns around and his face lights up. “Blaine dude. And Kurt - it’s Kurt, right?” Blaine gives him a strange look, Kurt presumes because who else would Blaine be holding hands with in the drugstore. “Because you did say that you were going out with Kurt tonight and not to wait up,” Blaine nods but Sam continues. “Like four times.”

“Nice to meet you,” Kurt says, saving Blaine from his evident embarrassment. It is kind of cute that he was talking about their date to Sam. Four times. He thinks he only told Mercedes three times. And speak of the devil as his phone buzzes. Though she really shouldn’t be calling as she knows he’s s on a date. “Sorry I need to take this for one second. She wouldn’t call unless it was important. Hi. No, no. Still out...We’re heading back to my place. Just ran into his roommate in the drugstore...Yup, that drugstore. His idea...Yes, totally...You are?...Really? Next weekend?

“What is it?” Blaine asks distracted by Kurt’s suddenly zealous tone.

“Mercedes is coming to visit. Next weekend,” Kurt claps his hands. “We should all have dinner,” Kurt looks at Blaine and Sam.

“Yes, all of us. That would be awesome,” Blaine says, eyeing Sam. “I can finally make you my famous shake and bake chicken.”

“And I do a mean roasted potato,” Sam adds. “Assuming Mercedes likes potatoes, of course.”

“I love roast potatoes,” Mercedes says through the phone, now on speaker. “I would love to. Can’t wait to meet Blaine. And Sam, of course.”

“It’s a plan,” Blaine smiles. “Now if you’ll just excuse us.” Blaine makes his way around Sam to the coveted condoms.

“Aww it’s how you met, right?” Sam says half in jest all in earnest.

“Very romantic,” Kurt deadpans.

“Hey,” Blaine knocks into his side as he grabs their favourite box, “You never know who you might meet perusing a condom aisle at Duane Reade on a Saturday night.”

The beginning of all great love stories.

#that's all folks!#happy hols and hope you enjoyed!#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: zealous #gleekto writes #unsolicited advice

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flowerfan2 · 3 years

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A Wonderful Christmastime

Klaine, 1600 words, A03.

Summary: Sometimes being up in the middle of the night together is an act of love. A moment of holiday peace for Kurt and Blaine.

Note: This fic incorporates the first seven words of Klaine Advent 2020 (abashed (a classic fic word if ever there was one), brake, careless, dispensable, event, farm, and gray). It also marks my sixth (non-consecutive) year of writing for Klaine Advent.

The inspiration for the story came from a conversation with @mildly-allergic-to-life and is a gift for her - I hope you like it! Thanks also to my wonderful beta, @perryavenue.

********

Blaine snuggles deeper into the blankets and turns over, reaching out to pull Kurt against him – it’s chilly on this December night, and he knows Kurt’s feet will be cold, but he doesn’t mind. Sadly, his hand flops onto their soft flannel sheets without finding his husband. Moments later, Blaine’s half-asleep brain registers the sound of Kurt’s voice through the monitor and he smiles despite the late hour.

He drags himself out of bed and steps across the narrow hall to Taylor’s room. Kurt is lying on the floor next to her crib, singing quietly with careless grace, one hand resting gently on their baby’s back.

“Hey,” Blaine whispers. “How long have you been in here?”

Kurt twists his head to look at Blaine. “Most of the first act, and part of the second, but I skipped some of the songs.” He glances at their daughter and back at Blaine. “Legally Blonde is inspirational, but not entirely age appropriate.”

“Come to bed, you must be exhausted.”

“I can’t,” Kurt says. “Every time I take my hand off her back she wakes up.”

“Bring her with you,” Blaine says. Since they brought their newborn home six months ago this has been the topic of constant debate in their house, and with everyone they know, who all apparently feel qualified to share their opinion on how to get babies to sleep. They waver back and forth between keeping her in bed with them and trying to get her to sleep on her own, and various compromises in between. (And as they told Tina, who insisted that their very lack of routine was the problem, maybe as long as the three of them are happy and healthy she should just keep her opinions to herself.)

“You have rehearsal all day tomorrow,” Kurt says. “You need to rest. I can stay here, I don’t mind.” Kurt has built himself a little nest on the floor out of a spare quilt and throw pillows, and he’s wearing his fluffy slippers on his ever icy feet, but he still can’t be all that comfortable.

“I’ll sleep better with the two of you in our bed,” Blaine replies. Kurt shrugs, and accepts Blaine’s hand as he reaches down to help Kurt up.

As predicted, Taylor blinks her gray-blue eyes open as soon as Kurt stops touching her, but Blaine scoops her out of bed and nuzzles her little face before she can make a noise. When he looks up, Kurt is gazing fondly at the two of them.

“She has your eyelashes,” Kurt says, and Blaine grins.

“She’s a baby, they all have eyelashes like this.”

“That’s a lie, she has the best eyelashes of any baby ever. And she’s definitely going to have your enviable curls,” Kurt goes on, touching the still wispy dark hair on their daughter’s head.

“If she does, you’re in charge of hair care.”

“As if I’d let you get your gel anywhere near her.” It’s a running joke, but Blaine is serious – his hair looks so much better now that he let Kurt take charge of his products. Of course, these days he’s lucky to catch a shower before running off to rehearsal, let alone have time to style his hair, but that’s another story. Taylor comes first, and no amount of bedhead is going to change that.

Back in their own room they slide under the covers, carefully settling Taylor between the two of them, Kurt reaching across to lay his hand on Blaine’s waist. There’s a soft reddish glow to the light, coming in from the Christmas decorations in their living room. It feels peaceful.

“So what made you choose Legally Blonde to sing tonight?” Blaine asks, keeping his voice quiet as Taylor settles back into sleep. “With all the Sondheim you’ve done lately, I would have thought you’d have picked one of those.”

“I know, right?” Kurt replies. “I think it started because I had the part about the department store stuck in my head.”

“First take a deep breath, take it all in. Feel all the halogens warming your skin,” Blaine sings.

“I always loved that song. I mean, who would have thought there’d be a song about how amazing it feels to walk into the fragrance section of a department store?” Kurt says reverently.

“Right?”

“Don’t tease, you know I’m serious about the value of personal service for some things,” Kurt says. “Websites are good for certain products, but you can’t discover your personal scent on your computer.”

“Did you know that Harry Gordon Selfridge started putting the perfume counter by the front doors in part to cover up the, um, less pleasant odors outside?”

Kurt frowns. “No, but if that’s true, it makes sense. I figured it was just to entice people into spending money on scent while they were on their way in looking for clothes.”

“That too.” Blaine sighs. “So, what made you think about department stores? Have you been worrying about holiday shopping? Because we said we were going to go easy on that this year.” He inclines his head towards the baby lying between them. They love their child more than either of them can express, but she is a money pit, and they have had to revise their current budget several times to identify dispensable items.

“I think it was more that I’m so used to searching the web for deals at night…” Kurt breaks off and glares at Blaine, “and no, I was not online shopping just now.”

Blaine smirks. “I know. Your phone is still on your nightstand.” For the first few months of parenthood Kurt had spent way too much money keeping himself awake during midnight feedings by scouring the web for deals on fabric and craft supplies. After a frank review of their credit card bills, Kurt had agreed to put the brakes on his nighttime online shopping sprees.

Kurt taps his finger against Blaine’s hip. “I may have purchased a few items yesterday,” he admits, abashed. “But they were all for Taylor. Mostly I just send my dad and Carole links. If we leave them to their own devices who knows what they’ll buy her, and they’re happy to farm out the task to me.”

They lapse into silence, listening to the even, soft breaths of their little girl, who has finally loosened her grip on the silk-trimmed blanket she can’t bear to be without.

“I do understand the urge,” Blaine says. “Like wanting to stop and shop for unnecessary plastic objects…” Blaine says, a snippet of another song passing through his brain, and Kurt looks at him questioningly. “You know, from Nanci Griffith’s intro to that song, when she talks about the need to go into a Woolworth’s and buy unnecessary plastic objects?”

Kurt gazes at him, charmed. “No, I don’t know that one.”

“It’s called Love at the Five and Dime.” Blaine hums it for a second, remembering driving in the car with his mom, singing along.

“Rita was sixteen years, hazel eyes and chestnut hair. She made the Woolworth counter shine. And Eddie was a sweet romancer, and darn good dancer, and they'd waltz the aisles of the five and dime.”

”And they'd sing - "Dance a little closer to me Dance a little closer now Dance a little closer tonight Dance a little closer to me 'cause it's closing time and love's on sale tonight at this five and dime."

The melody is soft and sweet, and Blaine does his best to echo the singer’s gentle, swinging style.

Kurt rubs his thumb along Blaine’s hip. “That’s really pretty.”

“I’ll play it for you sometime. She does this neat thing where she plinks her guitar string to sound like the ‘ding’ of the elevator. I think it would work on the piano.”

“It’s a nicer shopping song than the Legally Blonde one,” Kurt says.

“It’s about love, not shopping, really.”

“So is the Legally Blonde one,” Kurt insists. “Elle is taking Emmett shopping for clothes so that he has exactly the right look to give him the confidence he needs. That’s an act of love.”

“I know.” Blaine smiles at Kurt, thinking of all the hours they’ve spent selecting outfits, Kurt never failing to offer his opinion on what Blaine should wear for an audition, or an interview, or some other career defining event. Kurt always does everything he can to help Blaine feel prepared to face the world, and Blaine appreciates it more than he can say.

“Anyway, I like the song,” Kurt says. “Sing some more.”

Blaine smiles and sings the rest of the Nanci Griffith song. By the end, the hand Kurt had rested on Blaine’s hip has gotten restless, and is moving enticingly towards Blaine’s ass.

“Honey?” Blaine asks, catching Kurt’s eye. “Is me singing about shopping turning you on?”

Kurt runs his hand back over Blaine’s hip, then walks his fingers up Blaine’s chest over his pajama shirt, his touch light and teasing. He catches Blaine’s gaze. “You should know by now, you singing about anything turns me on.”

They both look at Taylor, who is sleeping deeply now, her whole body lax. They obviously can’t get intimate with her lying in between them, but…

“Wanna go fool around by the Christmas tree?” Blaine asks, grinning.

They extricate themselves from the bed carefully, arranging the blankets just the right distance away from and around their daughter, and creep out to the living room. Kurt takes an afghan off the couch and spreads it on the floor. They lie down together, gazing at each other under the twinkling lights, until Blaine pulls Kurt into a fervent kiss.

At one point they roll a little too close to the tree, and they freeze, giggling, as Kurt re-positions a sparkling ornament so it doesn’t fall on them during an inopportune moment. And if Blaine has a bit of tinsel in his hair come morning, no one minds a bit.

End notes (sorry, I seem to have a lot of notes for this little fic)

The songs mentioned are Nanci Griffth’s very lovely Love At The Five And Dime, and Take It Like A Man from Legally Blonde. I really also wanted to work in the Barenaked Ladies ode to shopping, too, (just called Shopping) but it didn’t fit. Title is from Paul McCartney’s song A Wonderful Christmastime, covered by the Barenaked Ladies on their holiday album (which is great and includes some really fun Hanukkah songs too).

Note also that Blaine and Kurt are also tired of people asking about their baby’s name, as well as poking their nose into her sleeping habits. They picked Taylor because it’s gender-neutral and they like it, and not because Blaine knows the words to every Taylor Swift song.

#Klaine Advent 2020 #Klaine Advent: grey #Klaine #Klaine fic #@mildy-allergic-to-life #Holiday fluff #10 Years of Klaine

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redheadgleekfic · 3 years

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Author: redheadgleek Rating: Teenage and Above Pairing: Klaine Summary: From a prompt by @spaceorphan18.

"It’s the holiday season, so flight attendant Blaine returns a package that a little girl accidentally left on a flight. Naturally, this leads to him spending Christmas at the little girl’s house and falling in love with her dad Kurt."

Written for Klaine Advent 2020. Complete with epilogue.

#klaine #klaine advent 2020 #klaine fanfic #julia writes #fic: sure like never before #fic series: eyes meeting over the noise

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gorgxoxus · 3 years

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Klaine Advent Day 1: abashed

hi, hello, whyyyyyy am i doing this. I got angry that it is summer in Australia, and all you in the Northern Hemisphere are experiencing cold weather and/ or snow, so here is Klaine - Aussie summer edition. Also has been edited once and i am not a writer.

Blaine decided after graduating college a semester early in 2019, to go travelling to Australia and visit as much as he could. He got to Perth, Western Australia with his friends Quinn, Tina, Elliott and Sam when the pandemic hit and decided to stay in Australia. Sam and Elliott decided to go home and Quinn and Tina decided to stay. A few months extra of Australian summer and spring is better than going home. After ending a previous college fling, he doesn’t feel like anything is waiting for him at home.

It’s now late November 2020 and he’s still here with Quinn and Tina. A few months more turned into the rest of the year. Cases are still rising at home, so he is just enjoying being in Western Australia. It is warm, Covid cases are almost non-existent here and he does not have a big urge to get back. He is content with the coastal life right now.

He rises early on December 1st, knowing that the temperatures are going to be nearing 110, or what Australians call 42 degrees. He still gets confused about Celsius temperatures after being here a year. He is used to snow in winter, but this one of the many new experiences he’s had this year.

He leaves the apartment with Quinn carrying their towels down the path towards the ocean. The water is refreshing and afterwards he heads to the kiosk, a new word he learnt this year.

There’s a new guy manning the register who does not like he should be outside on a 110-degree day. With his pale skin, his long sleeve shirt and styled hair do, he looks like he should be the one in New York this December. His name tag reads Kurt so when serving him thanks him, and when he says his name he leans forward a bit. He cannot tell if Kurt is blushing with his already warm cheeks. He ducks out with his drink and almost forgets that Quinn was waiting behind him about to order a green juice.

She teases him the whole walk back, and he worries if should be feeling ashamed about his blatant flirting on Kurt. All he knows is that his December has been brightened up.

#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: abashed #i am nervous lol #my fic

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klaineccfanficlibrary · 1 year

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Hi! Hope you guys are doing well. Can you recommend some fics with hallmark vibe to it? I'm having a rough time (year more like it, lol) so I need something sweet as an escape. I know A Summer Story has that vibe and I enjoyed every ride, every twist and turn of it so maybe if you have anything similar, preferably rated M, that'd be awesome. Thanks a lot. Happy early new year!

A Very Hallmark Christmas by @coffeegleek

Semi-famous actor!Kurt and semi-famous actor!Blaine work the Hallmark Christmas Movie circuit in true B-actor form. Though they’ve worked on the same movies before, this time they land roles that could change their lives forever. Mostly happy fluff, but has some angst. This is Hallmark, so of course it has a happy ending. Many of my favorite tropes have been included: badboy!Kurt who really has a heart of gold and sweetness, famous!Kurt, famous!Blaine, actor!Kurt, actor!Blaine, soulmates, soulmarks, AU Glee, angst with a happy ending, and fluff. There’s also a heavy dose of cheesy Hallmark Christmas Movie writing in both the script and commercials. In true AU form, canon characters abound in various non-canon roles.

Originally this was my Klaine Advent 2018 fic that I brain froze on and knew was confusing because the first 2 chapters were stand-alone, random one shots before I got the idea in chapter 3 for a whole verse. So this is that Hallmark story verse only reworked to make it better and stand on its own. All of the Advent words are included in this fic.

Note: Part 1 of the A Very Hallmark Christmas series

~~~~~

The Holiday by afterthenovels

A Klaine AU for the movie “The Holiday” with Kurt as Amanda and Blaine as Graham:

Kurt trades homes for the holidays because he wants to get away from his life for a while. But the last thing he expects to meet in the quiet English town he’s staying in is someone like Blaine.

~~~~~

Home For Christmas by ItsNotEasyBeingQueen

Blaine and Kurt are next-door neighbors and best friends, but come their first Christmas, they find out something shocking - Kurt loves Christmas; Blaine does not. Kurt sets out to change Blaine’s mind, and in the process, they both might end up getting the best gift of all.

~~~~~

Klaine Advent 2020 by bowtiesandboatshoes

Kurt and Blaine meet at the "premiere" of Rachel and Cooper's Hallmark Christmas movie

#klaine fanfiction #klaine fanfic #Hallmark #fic finder

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notarelationship · 3 years

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Klaine Advent 2020

Dalton Drabbles: 100 *throws drabble limits into the air like confetti* 800 (or more) Words A Day

Word: remarkable

Kurt tried to blink, but his eyes wouldn’t open. And his mouth tasted like - he tongued his teeth as if he might recognize them, but the best he could come up with was that it tasted like he imagined the drip pan they used for oil changes at the garage would taste, if he’d ever thought about what that tasted like. Kurt tried to wriggle, but there was something behind him, and also wriggling made his stomach lining try to crawl up his esophagus and out his mouth, and he definitely didn’t want that.

After a few more minutes of breathing and not moving at all, Kurt realized that he was not alone, wherever he was, and that the thing behind him blocking him from moving was also breathing. Another minute and he could open his eyes, and then, with an effort rivaling that of Satine fighting off The Duke, Kurt managed to push himself upright enough to take a look at his surroundings.

He was in Blaine’s room, in Blaine’s bed, with Blaine. Kurt held back the panic with the bile, but a quick check confirmed that he was still wearing the clothes he put on the day before - then he gasped, as the previous night’s events replayed in his head. Blaine in his car for an hour (what did they talk about? Sectionals - or competition songs? That sounded familiar), Rachel's party, drinking too much at Rachel’s party (why didn’t anyone stop him??) - but that’s where his memory ended.

Kurt’s mouth tasted like glue and he really wanted a glass of water. He had no idea if Blaine kept water in his room - he’d only been in Blaine’s room a couple of times, and usually not for very long. Kurt moved until he could sit up, closing his eyes tightly when the room started spinning around him.

“Kurt?” Kurt forced his eyes open to find a sleepy Blaine looking up at him from the bed. Under different circumstances Kurt would be very interested in what might happen next. “Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

“Water?” Kurt croaked out.

Blaine rolled off the bed and opened a mini fridge hiding under his desk, retrieving two bottles of water, and Kurt noticed he was wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants - so he could put aside any lingering fear that something had “happened” and he didn’t remember. That would have been a real tragedy. After handing one of the bottles to Kurt, Blaine pulled a basket out from a shelf under his bedside table, fishing around until he found what he was looking for. “How about some ibuprofen?”

Kurt nodded, taking two pills from Blaine and swallowing them with his water. “I have some questions.”

One corner of Blaine’s mouth went up as he tried not to smile. “You had a little bit too much to drink at Rachel’s party, so I drove us back here, only it was after curfew by the time we got back so we had to sneak in.”

“How does someone sneak into Dalton?” Kurt asked.

Blaine looked apologetic when he answered. “Sebastian.” When Kurt frowned Blaine explained, “He was the person most likely to know how to sneak in.”

Kurt still wanted to ask if there was anything between them, but maybe now wasn’t the time. “Maybe I should go back to my room?”

“Kurt, Sebastian isn’t,” Blaine struggled for words. “We aren’t anything. I find him kind of annoying, actually.” Blaine shrugged. “And it’s nearly 3:30 am, if you get caught we could both get into trouble.” Blaine sat on the edge of the bed turning his head to look at Kurt. “I’m okay with you staying here, if you are.”

Kurt’s stomach did a little flip, but he couldn’t tell if it was the budding hangover or the excitement. “You don’t mind?”

“Not at all.” Blaine kept looking at Kurt, but he wasn’t smiling anymore. If Kurt didn’t feel (and probably look) like a complete disaster, he might have thought Blaine wanted to kiss him. But that seemed too remarkable to be true, and then the moment shattered when Blaine stood up and went to his dresser, pulling out a non-matching pair of sweats and a t-shirt. “You can change, if you want to, I actually have my own bathroom.” Blaine opened a door that Kurt had pegged as a closet, and on the other side was a full bathroom. It was small, but it was private.. Blaine pulled a new toothbrush out of one of the drawers under the sink and set it on the sink..

“Quite the boy scout,” Kurt said after Blaine stepped back into the bedroom. “And after I change you are going to explain how you wound up with a private bathroom,” Kurt said, shakily accepting the clean clothes.

#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: remarkable

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darriness · 3 years

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Klaine Advent 2020 - Day 10

Title: Join

Author: darriness

Word Count: 552

Summary: A Christmas bath

AO3 Link

Blaine lets out a lazy sigh as he skims his hands on top of the water in the tub around him. He lays his head back on the pillow behind his head suctioned to the tub and smiles up at the ceiling. He is so relaxed at the moment. Every muscle has released and it’s like he’s literally floating on a cloud. He’s off work for the week, Christmas Eve is tomorrow, it’s their first Christmas in their new house, and...he’d had a glass of wine with dinner. He is in heaven.

He closes his eyes and hums along with the music playing from the speakers on the vanity. Baby, It’s Cold Outside - the song that never fails to bring a smile to his face.

“Say what’s in this drink?” Blaine’s eyebrows lift and he smiles wider as he opens his eyes to see Kurt leaning against the bathroom door jam. His husband is also smiling as he crosses his arms over his chest.

“What’s in your drink? Just enough alcohol to make you want to sleep with me.” Blaine jokes.

Kurt laughs before shaking his head, “I don’t need liquid courage to sleep with you.” He says, “And I didn’t then.”

Blaine’s eyebrows lift again as if to say ‘Fair point’ before he sighs again and goes back to drifting his hands over the water.

“So, are you going to join me?” He asks.

Kurt smirks as his fingers go to the buttons of his shirt, “Are you sure you don’t want to enjoy your bath all by yourself?” He asks.

Blaine chuckles softly, “A wet naked Kurt trumps solitude anyday.”

“Good answer.” Kurt says as he finishes removing his shirt and moves onto his pants.

Blaine watches him in the lazy way one does when you’ve been together so long you know every part of your partner. He’s seen Kurt undress innumerable times and while the sight of Kurt’s naked body still causes his breath to catch, there’s also a comfort to it that makes Blaine feel settled.

When Kurt is naked he steps into the tub and sits facing Blaine. It doesn’t take a lot of arranging to do this - this tub was a definite selling feature for the house. It comfortably fits them both.

Blaine pouts his lips, “What are you doing all the way over there?”

Kurt huffs out a laugh and rolls his eyes affectionately before he shifts so he’s sitting between Blaine’s legs and leaning against his husband’s chest.

Blaine sighs as they shift into a comfortable position, “Much better.”

Kurt lets his fingers trail slowly up and down Blaine’s thighs under the water as the pair sits in comfortable silence. O Holy Night is now playing over the speakers and Blaine smiles as Kurt’s head drifts back and forth on his chest in time with the music.

“Can you believe this is our last Christmas just the two of us?” Blaine murmurs after a bit.

Kurt’s head stops its soft back and forth, “It’s a bit surreal, isn’t it? Next year we’ll have a tiny human around.”

Blaine hums, “No more Christmas Eve Eve baths.” He says.

Kurt shrugs, “She’s got to sleep sometime.”

Blaine chuckles as the pair lapse into silence once more to listen to the music and enjoy their bath.

#klaine advent 2020 #klaine advent: join #klaine #klaine fanfiction #klaine fanfic #my loves #my stuff

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wowbright · 3 years

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Mormon!Klaine Master Post

Art by @gleefulpoppet. (Here is the post where I squee about the art in detail.)

Updates frequently. If you are reading from a reblog, please click through to the original post to get the most complete list.

Follow the tag for updates: mormon!Klaine

The Mormon!Klaine verse tells the story of Kurt and Blaine growing up as Mormons, meeting while serving as missionaries in Germany, and falling in love. Kurt comes out in high school; Blaine doesn’t figure out he’s gay until he’s on his mission. Two complete works in the verse have been posted to AO3. I've also written lots of vignettes that I am working on incorporating into a long fic that will at some point be posted on AO3.

Fics on AO3

Stake Dance—How Burt met Kurt’s mother in the Mormon!Klaine verse. (ao3)

Small Things (ao3), about Kurt growing up Mormon

Abashed—Preteen Blaine has an embarrassing interview with the bishop. (ao3)

Courtship Flight—Preteen Blaine watches So You Think You Can Dance because there are Mormons on it. He keeps watching because one of those Mormons is mesmerizing. (ao3)

The Glory of the Stars (ao3)—Originally titled A Marvelous Work and a Wonder, it’s about the first day of Kurt and Elder Anderson working/living together as missionary companions (co-missionaries) in Germany

Out of Eden—As a gay Mormon, Kurt Hummel has decided to go the rest of his life without falling in love. But toward the end of his two years as a missionary in Germany, Elder Anderson moves into his apartment—and Kurt's best-laid plans fall apart. (Work in progress. New chapter posted twice a week. ao3/rebloggable tumblr post)

Fics on Tumblr

Since many of these posts have been worked into future chapters Out of Eden on AO3, I have set them to private, so when you click on them you’ll get a “post not found” message. I’ll make them public again as the related AO3 chapter goes up. Why? Because the AO3 version is better and more coherent, so I’d rather not people come over from AO3 to read ahead and then get a subpar reading experience. Apologies to those who want to read faster than I am posting to AO3, but really, you deserve better than the mess I posted to tumblr.

Pre-mission:

Stake Dance—How Burt met Kurt’s mother in the Mormon!Klaine verse. (ao3)

Small Things (ao3), about Kurt growing up Mormon

Abashed—Preteen Blaine has an embarrassing interview with the bishop. (ao3)

Courtship Flight—Preteen Blaine watches So You Think You Can Dance because there are Mormons on it. He keeps watching because one of those Mormons is mesmerizing. (ao3)

First several weeks of Kurt and Blaine’s mission together:

First few days

Whenever I Feel The Rain On My Face—Blaine loves walking to church in the rain.

I Like to Look for Rainbows—Kurt and Blaine’s first sacrament meeting together.

Spontaneous Combustion—Kurt takes his new companion to the barber.

Mysteries & Contradictions—Elder Anderson has an embarrassing miscommunication.

Kurt comes out

Indispensable—Blaine is a little jealous of the pretty girl who sends Kurt letters.

Of Good Report—It shouldn’t be that hard for Kurt to come out to his new companion. But for some reason, it is.

The missionaries meet some young women who are more interested in Elder Anderson than in the gospel

Flirting with Danger—The day-to-day work of proselytizing can be grueling. But talking about vampires and the nonexistence of hell can help lighten the mood. As can using your charm to interest two giggly girls in spiritual matters.

Curb Your Enthusiasm—Kurt’s new companion needs to stop flirting with investigators.

Love One Another—Blaine wants to understand his companion better, but he doesn’t always ask his questions the right way.

On and around Blaine’s birthday

Animal—Blaine gets a care package from his brother.

Sneaky—Kurt cooks up a birthday surprise for his new companion.

Best Birthday Ever—Elder Hummel makes Blaine’s birthday a day worth celebrating.

Belonging—Blaine gets the best birthday present ever, and no one can tell him otherwise.

Interstitial drama

Transparent—Blaine knows he has to stop wanting to be the center of everyone’s attention.

Mourn With Those Who Mourn — A familiar song reopens old wounds for Kurt.

Learning to Play the Cello—Blaine and Elder Hummel learn to share a sink.

The missionaries meet Chandler and get ready for Easter

Elder Hummel’s Second Biggest Fan—Kurt and Blaine meet someone at the sheet music store who’s interested in the church. Or maybe he’s just interested in Kurt.

Can’t Be Torn Apart—Blaine is not surprised by how eager Chandler is to see Elder Hummel again.

Something Remarkable—Kurt frets about what to wear. (Or, Kurt’s reaction to Chandler’s flirtations in the sheet music store.)

Boundaries—Blaine starts learning to recognize when the ladies are flirting with him.

Modes of Transportation—Why are some flirts more annoying than others?

The Joy of Service—Kurt needs to plan for Easter worship. Blaine is eager to help.

Trying to Love—A week or two after Kurt and Blaine start working with each other, they have lunch with the sister missionaries.

Wordplay—The missionaries get a surprise investigator. Kurt gets a surprise flirtation.

Petulant—Blaine doesn’t want to share the Gospel with Chandler.

Cedars of Lebanon—For their scripture study, Blaine picks out something on the theme of friendship.

Strong When You’re Beside Me—Kurt and Blaine have a disagreement over the tastefulness of certain Easter decorations.

Like Someone I Know—Kurt and Blaine have their first official get-together with Chandler.

Engagement—The missionaries help Fräulein Pilzburg get ready for her move.

Can’t You See—Blaine is trying not to be homophobic. But he’s really uncomfortable with how much this Chandler guy is hitting on Elder Hummel.

Lucrative—Chandler doesn’t show up to church. But someone else does.

Lift Up Your Head—Blaine has a change of heart.

P-day

Something New—Blaine gets something new to wear on his day off.

Chemicals Kicking In—Why the heck is Blaine so horny on P-day?

Happy Secret—Blaine appreciates the body God gave him.

Take a Bite of My Heart—Sing, don’t schwing.

Love Surprises—Blaine gets personal. Plus, a letter from Tina.

Easter weekend

All Creatures Great and Small—Kurt and Blaine get a surprise visitor.

Spider-Cat—Kurt and Blaine need to figure out what to do with the cat that dropped in through their skylight. They turn to the sister missionaries for help.

Anything Lovely—Kurt changes his tie. A friendly doctrinal discussion ensues

Family—At choir rehearsal, Blaine tries not to be a jerk to Chandler.

Formed of Clay—At choir rehearsal, Blaine gains a new understanding.

My Way Home—Blaine is romantic even when he doesn’t mean to be.

Easter Hunt—Kurt gets an Easter surprise.

Sweet/Tart—Blaine arrives at church on Easter and is jealous of Chandler’s outfit.

New Friendship—Investigators make friends at the Easter service.

Guidance—Chandler explains the changes that have been made to the German soundtrack of Disney’s Little Mermaid over the years. Blaine tries to make people feel welcome.

Froot Loops & Resurrection—Kurt’s mind is all over the place during Easter service.

Love’s Redeeming Work—Easter brings some surprise visitors to church.

Start of Something New — The missionaries enjoy a movie on Easter.

Line Upon Line — A romantic song sparks a memory for Blaine.

Irreverence—Kurt thought Elder Anderson was an open book. Surprise, surprise: it’s more complicated than that.

The Blessing of Animals—Kurt and Blaine celebrate Easter Monday.

Last Night You Helped Me Through—At the end of Easter weekend, the cat returns home.

Post-Easter

Straight Guys Can Tell—Turns out, Chandler is kind of hot. Blaine panics.

Let’s Talk About Love—In English group, the discussion centers on optical illusions and love.

Look Once—Kurt and Blaine converse on the bus ride home from English group.

Righteous Anger—Our favorite missionaries brace themselves for an encounter with Elder Clarington.

Forebearance—Elder Clarington has some wild ideas about the interplay of religion and German grammar.

Thy Love’s Embrace— Blaine feels a burning in his bosom. (Authors note more than a year after posting: Ignore the references to Easter. I moved this scene in the timeline after deciding it was too intense to happen so early in their mission.)

Own True Love—Singing birds are a portent of spring.

Dear John—Blaine gets dumped by Tina. He didn’t even know he was dating her.

Seek After These Things—Kurt has an awkward/important conversation with Chandler, who he’s supposed to be trying to convert but doesn’t really want to.

Too Sacred to Share—Chandler is awfully nosy. (Kurt’s important after-church in-the-park conversation with Chandler continues.)

Companions—Blaine knows Chandler isn’t the soul of evil. And he knows Elder Hummel isn’t going to do anything to risk his mission. But it’s hard to watch them become friends.

I Close My Eyes at Night — Blaine has found himself feeling more aroused than usual.

Lock the Door and Turn the Lights Down Low—Kurt overhears Blaine doing something very, very private.

Pleasure and the Law of Chastity—Elder Anderson wants to make sure Kurt’s needs are taken care of.

Distractions—Chandler has big news for the missionaries.

Mismatch—Blaine wonders out loud if Kurt wishes he could go on a date with another guy.

All That I Need—The missionaries rack up some baptisms!

Day of Splits

Perfection in Future Tense—Kurt is absolutely not going to touch himself, but he sure as heck is going to figure out what the Scriptures say about such activities.

All This Change—You wouldn’t think a visit to the dentist’s office would lead to so many doctrinal insights. But where Kurt, a Mormon dentist, and Elder Nixon are involved, you’d be wrong.

Begging the Question—Blaine has to work with Elder Clarington for a day and is not impressed by his communication skills.

A Council in Heaven—Blaine’s day with Elder Clarington gets more interesting.

Splits— Blaine has to work with Elder Clarington for a day. It goes about as well as one would expect.

After splits

Eternal Truths—It starts out as a light-hearted discussion about their culinary and dating histories. Then it takes a turn.

Flat Tire—What seems like a curse turns out to be a blessing.

Your Heart’s Been Aching—Kurt has an explicit dream, Blaine gets sick, and new converts just keep coming their way.

Running—Blaine is running away.

Flash Fire—Kurt makes a decision.

Reid or Romney—Emma introduces some new terminology to the missionaries.

Mustard Seed—Even missionaries struggle with faith.

Recognition—Kurt wishes his companion would stop flirting with the sister missionary. Also, a duet.

Losing My Sleep—Kurt and Blaine can’t sleep. Blaine suggests turning their insomnia into a sleepover.

Wisdom to Listen—Blaine can’t sleep. His body is telling him something.

Conversations in the Dark—Kurt and Blaine continue their slumber party by talking about love and family, as one does.

Mid-mission

Concert night & aftermath

A New Beginning—Blaine and Kurt—no, Elder Hummel—get ready for the concert.

Firefly—Kurt and Blaine attend a classical music concert.

Another Universe—Kurt lets himself imagine.

Invisible—Blaine makes a mess of things.

Knowing and Being Known—It’s wrong to make the Savior cry. But sometimes it’s right to do the same thing to your companion.

When Change and Tears Are Past—Things are terrible. And then they aren’t. Actually, they’re quite the opposite.

Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day—On Mother's Day, Kurt makes one of his two phone calls home per year.

Mancrush (or Mother’s Day, Part 2)—There’s an elephant in the room. Cooper points it out.

Truth Eternal—Kurt listens to his mother. Or, Kurt looks through mementos on Mother’s Day and has a spiritual experience

Between Mother’s Day and Mission Conference

Zigzag—Kurt zigs when Blaine expects him to zag.

Little Bubble—Kurt gets a surprise package.

Mission Conference

Homesickness—Kurt and Blaine take a train ride to a mission conference with the sister missionaries. Kurt notices Blaine has been acting different.

By Mine Voice—Bewildered by his Mother’s Day phone call, Blaine slips into heresy.

By Common Consent — At the missionary conference, Elder Clarington says some very interesting things, and Kurt reunites with Jesse Saint James.

Confessions—Elder Nixon tells Blaine what’s going on with Elder Clarington. (And Blaine pines for Kurt.)

Tea Leaves—Blaine’s subconscious sends him some not-so-coded messages.

Dawning—Blaine has feelings.

Between Eternity and Eritrea—Blaine must control his thoughts. But he can’t control his insights.

All Is Well—The missionaries don’t want to leave the Deutsches Museum. Elder Nixon gets ready to meet with the mission president.

Licked Cupcake--Kurt and Elder Saint James talk religion and buy Kit Kats.

Vibes—Kurt panics. And then he doesn’t.

The Luckiest—Blaine gains new understanding.

Crush—Elder Nixon wonders if Blaine has a crush.

Core Strength—Blaine falls whim to Elder St James’s benevolent machinations.

Stunning Performance—An old face reappears.

God of All Things—Blaine gets some shocking news. Kurt pulls focus.

Bloom—Blaine has more feelings.

Ovaltine and Hot Chocolate—Blaine tries to get things back to normal.

Convergence—Kurt’s patience runs out.

Mirror—Kurt has his interview with the mission president.

Ancient Scrolls Don’t Lie—Kurt finds out what happened to Elder Thompson. (Sort of.)

Surprise!—Elder St. James has even more news for Kurt.

What’s Important—Mission politics.

Discernment—Kurt questions the mission president’s ability to discern God’s will.

Come Out of Hiding—At the end of the mission conference, President Steele gives some much-needed relationship advice.

What You Alone Can Give—Kurt’s in love, and God’s just fine with that.

Every Beautiful Thought—Blaine can’t sleep. Kurt can’t sleep. Warm milk, conversation, and feels ensue.

After the Mission Conference

Lovely Day –Blaine’s probably been in love with Kurt for a while.

Finlandia—In which Elder Anderson ends up in a recording studio.

Rings and Things—Kurt fiddles with his CTR ring. There are consequences. [Yeah, yeah, I know the narrative voice might make this sound like it should be taking place earlier in their mission together, but as I’ve been working on the story’s final version, I realized it needs to come later. The narrative inconsistencies will get fixed when it goes on AO3.]

Sweet Is the Taste—Kurt tries to fix his CTR ring.

Love at Home— Kurt’s CTR ring is broken. Blaine has a solution. It requires subterfuge. (Plus, a visit with some recent converts.)

Forever’s Not Enough Time—A dinner with the sister missionaries leads to a flirtatious duet.

Philosophies of Men—Kurt is changing.

Prodding—Kurt gets surprising news from Mercedes.

Don’t Be a Dumbass—After returning from the mission conference, Blaine gets a letter from Cooper.

I Think I Love Him—Is Blaine gay? He’s not sure. Time to seek out a second opinion.

Whatsoever Thy Soul Desireth—Blaine has a realization.

Clues I Didn’t See — Blaine is gay. Like really, really gay.

Plain to See —Blaine arranges a dinner with an older lesbian couple

One Body —Over dinner with the elderly Catholic lesbians, Kurt has a lot of complicated feelings.

Enough –Kurt wants to know why Blaine arranged dinner with the lesbians.

Crazy Dreamer—The aftermath of Kurt’s post-dinner-with-lesbians breakdown.

Lead, Kindly Light—Kurt and Blaine have a romantic getaway in the foothills of the Alps, except they think it’s platonic because they’re them.

I’ll Always Belong to You—Kurt loves his birthday present from Blaine.

Always—Blaine has a vision.

Confession Time

Doubt Your Doubts—Blaine has a question. Kurt doesn’t like it.

To Tell the Truth—Blaine tells Kurt the whole truth.

Crazy For You—Things get hot and heavy after Blaine confesses his secret to Kurt.

Personal Revelation—Kurt gains a new perspective.

Sweet to My Taste—Blaine finds out what it’s like to be loved in return.

A Misunderstanding—The missionaries have a double date with Chandler and his boyfriend.

Come Inside—Kurt reckons with his feelings after an accidentally tipsy Blaine said a little too much.

When I’m Bad, God’s So, So Good—Kurt and Blaine become the highest-baptizing companionship in the mission.

Summer Skies—A conversation at a church soccer game gets Kurt thinking about his choices.

Forever More —Kurt and Blaine close the windows and calm the lights. They let it out, and they let it all begin.

Words of Love —Kurt and Blaine learn a new way to love.

Post-mission (Kurt)

Brake—Kurt has a hard time readjusting to civilian life.

Blessing—Blaine and his mom have an important talk.

Grow As We Go—Kurt suspects that Blaine is planning a marriage proposal. He talks it over with his dad.

Something worth mentioning: Kurt and Blaine’s mission companionship takes place in 2014 and generally reflects church policies and culture at that time. Very occasionally, I may throw in a tangential anachronism for the purposes of storytelling. (I’ve included one so far and am actually still undecided about whether to keep it.) But not on anything major.

In 2014, the term “Mormon” was embraced. The church sponsored the “I’m a Mormon” social media campaign and website, put out a movie called “Meet the Mormons,” and ran numerous websites with “mormon” in the name. In 2018, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints made a complete turnaround when its new president/prophet announced receiving a revelation that no one should use the term to refer to the church or its adherents.

Pretending that characters living in 2014 didn’t use the term Mormon would introduce a major anachronism, so I don’t.

I welcome questions in my ask box!

#mormon!klaine #klaine advent 2020 #masterpost #klaine fic #klaine #my klaine advent 2020 #wowbright writes fic #tan hands and tan lines #klaine advent 2021 #klaine advent 2022 #klaine word scramble #klaineccvalentines2022 #klainevalentines2023 #klaineccvalentines 2021 #mormon!klaine masterpost #pinned post

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