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salvador-daley · 8 months

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Dead Sexy 💀😵💕 Updated!

An Umbrella Academy AU feat. Pathologist!Dave + MorgueRegular!Klaus

A/N: The brainrot continues. I hope you guys are enjoying reading this as much as I’m enjoying writing it. Don’t be strangers - lemme know your thoughts (and any wish-list items for future chapters).

CW: Nothing much to upset your stomach in this chapter. It’s all flirting and dirty crossword puzzles.

Dedicated to @kawaiic0mmunism (to whom the concept belongs) with thanks to @allisoooon for beta services and encouragement.

Summary: Dave is a pathologist working at the city morgue. And Klaus… well, Klaus just keeps turning up.

Snippet from Chapter 3:

Dave looks over the notes from the night shift and a resigned sigh escapes from his chest.

The familiar scent of weed confirms his suspicions before he even opens the body bag. As he slides the zip down he notes that Klaus is naked, as usual, but this time is covered in neon body paint; splashed and smeared over every limb, pasted in wide swathes over his chest, collecting in the crevices under his arms and between his fingers. An explosion of colour is arranged in a butterfly formation across his face, punctuated with swipes of glitter and stick-on sequins.

Klaus is as peaceful as always, a serene half-smile playing on his lips. And, as always, there isn’t a mark or a scratch on his body.

Dave pokes him, hard, in the chest.

“Ow! Whatchu do that for?” cries Klaus, instantly awake, jolting upright and shielding his ribs from further intrusions.

“Just checking,” says Dave.

Read the rest on AO3

Tagging because you haven’t told me to stop: @badsext @yeah-klave @softforklave @anglophile-rin @falloutby @merry-melody @neist @purblzart @maerenee930 @firstpersonnarrator @super-unpredictable98 @wcrmboy @spookyfbi @squishitude @courtneytarynofficial @mokolataddict @pickledbeefwastaken @love-is-dirty-baby @jender123 @vonkimmeren @narnianaos @sylvertyger @merrilark @faceache111 @rob-private @pietro-t1me @not-oscar-wilde @thislovelylife @falafel14

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firstpersonnarrator · 1 year

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#for the love of klave #tua #the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #robert sheehan #klave #tua klave #klave tua #dave katz #tua s2 #young dave katz #1960s dave katz

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wonderchica05 · 2 years

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In honor of today’s S4 announcement, I give you this tweet that Jeff King, TUA director, liked on Twitter.

We’re gonna win, babes 🥹🥹🥹

#new dimension new possibilities #diego x lila #klaus x dave #tua klave #klaus hargreeves #diego hargreeves #lila pitts #the umbrella academy #tua #tua season 3 #tua spoilers #tua season 4 #tua s4 speculation #tua s4 #umbrella academy

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mewnoon · 1 month

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Just to recap, Klaus decided to get sober,

had war flashbacks and relived finding his dead boyfriend

then died and met god probably for the first time

learned that his dad killed himself, all in one day

And after telling his siblings that their dad rather killed himself so they could investigate a murder mystery instead of trying to give them a call, what does our silly baby do?

#the umbrella academy #tua #klaus hargreeves #dave katz #klave #luther hargreeves #cutie patootie #craftgirly

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shit-people-probably-didnt-say · 7 months

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Klave 😭😭

#im sorry yall #the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #tua #klave #tua dave #david katz #dave katz

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davidjosephkatz · 2 months

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currently having a breakdown over this

#the umbrella academy #tua #klaus hargreeves #david joseph katz #dave #klave #dave x klaus #klaus x dave #*#<3

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yourgothuncle · 2 years

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@darbydoo22

holy fuck.

the amount of people he’s had die that you could now imagine he died with but got to come back. and the fact that if he knew he’d be devastated that he got to come back and they didn’t

#this is killing me #i was not prepared for this #the umbrella academy #tua #klaus hargreeves #klaus x dave #klaus/dave #klave

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jbre1206 · 1 year

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eddies-guitar13 · 1 year

Conversation

Viktor: what do you call disobeying the law?

Five: a hobby

Luther: *stares intensely at Five*

Five:...that we don't engage in

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air--so--sweet · 6 months

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So yesterday a producer of The Umbrella Academy posted this -

And seeing that caption, I had to go check the article out. The majority of stuff on it is things we already knew we'd likely be seeing (Umbrella's get their powers back, Ben's death etc) or things vague enough they could take multiple forms (Luther accepts himself, Viktor accepts his family).

However, there is one thing on that list that caught my eye...

Are we actually getting Klave? Happy together, both alive, Klave? Is this why Klaus isn't wearing the dog tags in the birthday video? Because he doesn't need a memento of Dave if Dave's alive?!

#the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #dave katz #tua #the umbrella academy season 4 #tua season 4 #klave #don't tease me like this

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salvador-daley · 9 months

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Dead Sexy 💀🪦🧡 Updated!

An Umbrella Academy AU feat. Pathologist!Dave + MorgueRegular!Klaus

A/N: You asked for more so… here it is. It would have come sooner, but a certain group of Anonymous dickheads put spanners to my plan. I’m really impressed at just how many of you have already subscribed to this silly little story. Stick around - there’s more in the works. 😘😘

(P.S. For anyone wondering if my other WIPs are on hold, don’t worry - more chapters of Chained and High Altitude are also on the way.)

CW: Description of a post-mortem exam

Dedicated to @kawaiic0mmunism (to whom the concept belongs) with thanks to @allisoooon

Summary: Dave is a pathologist working at the city morgue. And Klaus… well, Klaus just keeps turning up.

Snippet from Chapter 2:

Dave scrapes a sample from under each of Klaus’ fingernails, taking care to preserve any evidence that might indicate foul play.

Once the external exam is over, it’s time to check what’s ‘under the hood’, as Bob likes to call it. Dave has always found that turn of phrase off-putting, but there’s really no better way of describing it. Like a car mechanic, he needs to inspect the body’s cogs and gears to see which ones have failed.

Dave reaches for his scalpel and prepares to make his first incision; a deep cut from the front of each shoulder to the bottom of the breastbone, then down into a Y shape, the tail of which will extend from the sternum to the pubic bone, deviating to avoid the navel.

It will be a shame to cut through that tattoo.

He takes a deep breath and places the scalpel upon Klaus’ skin. It’s a strange and rare thing to do this on someone you’ve actually met and spoken to…

Klaus’ eyes pop open. “Hey, handsome!”

Dave leaps away from the autopsy table, flinging his scalpel to one corner of the room and his dictaphone to the other. “Holy fucking Jesus fucking Christ!”

Klaus raises his head. “Nope. Just me.”

Read the rest on AO3

Tagging because you haven’t told me to stop: @badsext @yeah-klave @softforklave @anglophile-rin @falloutby @merry-melody @neist @purblzart @maerenee930 @firstpersonnarrator @super-unpredictable98 @wcrmboy @spookyfbi @squishitude @courtneytarynofficial @mokolataddict @pickledbeefwastaken @love-is-dirty-baby @jender123 @vonkimmeren @narnianaos @sylvertyger @merrilark @faceache111 @rob-private @pietro-t1me @not-oscar-wilde @thislovelylife @falafel14