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#knives out
dearmasdaily · 2 days
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KNIVES OUT 2019 — dir. Rian Johnson
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citronbun · 3 days
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Skin care routine with the villains ! 🪞( ˘ ³˘)
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| #citronsfanart | Twitter |
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bigtreefest · 1 day
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🧚🏻‍♀️✨Bippity boppity bow chicka wow oww! You’ve been visited by the Shameless Hoe Fairy, and now you must share a hoe drabble about:
Ransom + kiss on the cheek + “You smell good.”
Meet the Parents
Boyfriend! Ransom Drysdale x Reader
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Word Count: 1,998
A/N: The Shameless Hoe Fairy? At my doorstep? What a surprise!! I was so excited to write this prompt, and hope I did Ransom justice.
Drabble? I don’t know her. I’ll call this a double Drabble based off word count?
Warnings: probably the most suggestive fic I’ve written, so just to be safe, minors DNI, allusions to smut, schmoozing but it’s actually so genuine, family, L-bomb, nickname/pet name usage
Dividers by @firefly-graphics
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You had spent two weeks coaching Ransom to meet your family. After a long phone call with your mom on the way home from work, she insisted you bring him over for dinner.
“Family should know everything about each other.” She insisted. You rolled your eyes and hummed in response. At this point, you knew that sometimes there was no fighting her and you just had to say whatever she wanted to hear.
“Okay, mom. I’ll talk to him about it, but to be fair, I haven’t even met his parents yet. Anyway, I’m pulling into my place right now. I’ve gotta let you go.” Your hand hovered over the keys in the ignition, eager to take them out as soon as she’d say goodbye.
“I don’t know why you’re kicking me off the phone so soon, but okay. We’ll plan it out for him to come over soon. Love you, bye.”
“Love you, too. Bye, mom.” You turned off the car and scooped up your bag and keys, heading inside.
As soon as you hit the kitchen, you flailed your arms out, dropping all your stuff on the island. You and Ransom had plans for him to come over and cook with you tonight, but after that call, there was no way that was gonna happen. You could only allocate your energy towards so much at a time.
You had considered asking Ransom if he wouldn’t mind doing the majority of the work for the meal tonight since the two of you had picked up the groceries over the weekend, but quickly thought better. You were already exhausted, no need to add a kitchen cluttered with dirty dishes and burnt food to the list.
You picked up your phone from the mess you made and called Ransom, surprised it only took one ring before he picked up.
“Hey, Sweetheart, I’m on the way over now. You better have a good recipe up your sleeve, because I’m driving through a row of restaurants and the scent is heavenly.” You wanted to laugh but your body felt too weighed down.
“About that, Ran. Can there be a change of plans? I know I said I’d teach you a new recipe tonight, but I have next to no energy left. Will you actually just pick something up? Your choice.”
The line went silent for a beat before you had to pull the phone away from your ear at Ransom’s boisterous response. “THANK GOD. Yes, I’ll do that. Be there in 20.”
And with that he hung up the phone and you flopped down on the couch waiting for him to arrive.
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Ransom’s knock on your door jerked you awake. You responded with a rasp. “It’s open.”
He made his way over to you and set down the bags of food on your coffee table.
“Hi, Ranny.” You smiled up at him, your eyes still half lidded with sleep.
Ransom reached for your hands, draping them over the back of his neck as he crouched over you, eventually lowering himself down so his head was on your chest, the rest of his broad form blanketing you on the couch. You kissed the top of his head and stroked his hair as he mumbled through his squished cheeks. “What’s got you all like…this?” He gestured to your face without looking up.
He still wasn’t that great at expressing his care for the emotions of others, but for you, he was trying. You sighed and patted his shoulders.
“Food first, then I’ll tell you.”
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You pushed back your takeout box on the coffee table and finally looked up at Ransom. He had been eyeing you skeptically the whole meal, leaning against the bottom of the couch, both of you sitting on the floor, as he ate his own food. It wasn’t like him to be that quiet. He must’ve been worried.
“Hi.” You softly whispered to him, looking back into his piercing gaze.
“Hi. You wanna tell me what’s going on now?” He returned with a gentle sternness in his tone.
You nodded, your shoulders rolling back as you built up the courage to address this big of a topic. “My parents want to meet you.”
Ransom’s jaw stopped chewing his food. He set down his utensils and swallowed, shifting to put his elbows on the table to look at you. “Okay… what’s so wrong with that? Parents love me.”
You grimaced, you really liked him, but didn’t want to subject your relationship to the gauntlet of your family.
“Nothing, really, it’s just, my parents are very traditional. Like, super religious and conservative.”
Ransom continued to look at you intently, nodding slowly. “So what exactly are you saying? I wouldn’t be approved by your parents?”
“No! I’m not saying that at all, I just want to make sure they see how great you are. They tend to judge harshly and quickly. The first time I brought a guy home, they literally said, ‘Yeah, I think you’d be better as friends. Let him down easy.’ And I never saw him again because couldn’t handle their disappointed faces every time I mentioned his name. I don’t want to have to go through that with you- no, I can’t go through that with you because I love you and you’re it for me.”
Ransom’s eyes went wide. That was the first time you had said it and he was surprised by how quotidian it seemed. Like you should’ve been saying it this whole time. Your eyes went wide as well with surprise at what had slipped out as his face morphed into a grin. It wasn’t shit-eating or mischievous, it was full of love and… lust?
“Get over here.” You silently scooted around the coffee table on your knees and made your way to Ransom as he reached his arms out and guided you into his lap. He pulled you close so your noses were touching, his long eyelashes fluttering along your cheeks as you whimpered.
“Let me show you how much I love you. I’ll savor you right here and treat you like the only woman on Earth, because you’re it for me, too.” Ransom made a move to press his lips against yours, but you pulled back.
“Wait, Ran. There’s something I have to tell you first.” His eyes darted in between yours with concern.
“My parents still think I’m a virgin.” His shoulders dropped as he looked at you incredulously, head cocked to the side.
“Is that it? I mean, we both know you’re far from pure already if I’ve got anything to say about it.” The corner of his mouth turned up and you hid your head in his neck. You pulled back, pushing your hands against his shoulders to keep distance so you could focus enough to get the rest of the information out.
“Just, with everything I told you, there are some household rules we’ll have to follow.”
“Mmhmm.” He hummed, kissing a trail up your forearm.
“Ran, I mean it. No kissing around them, not on the lips at least. Forehead and cheek only.”
“Yeah, I get it.” He continued, kissing his way up the other arm.
“Seriously, and no inappropriate touching, or private conversations in a separate room.”
His trail continued up your neck. “Is that all?”
You sighed and tilted your head back, closing your eyes. “You probably have to bring a bottle of wine. And flowers for my mom and sister.” You meant to sound stern, but it came out as more of a gasp.
“Consider it done, sweetheart.” He moved up your cheek, then leaned in for a deep kiss that left you breathless.
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Two weeks later, you were staying at your parents’ house for a long weekend. They had come to pick you up, and Ransom was going to drive you back home after the meal so you could go to work the next morning. Letting Ransom stay over would probably never be a thought in their mind until the two of you were married, so he was only coming over for Sunday night dinner.
You were nervous and hoped his weeks of prep had been taken to heart. On a normal day with Ransom, he was all over you, so you had no idea how he was going to keep his hands to himself, if only for a few hours.
You had told him your parents valued punctuality, too, having met in the military, so you were delighted to hear the doorbell at 5:15 when they’d told him to be there at 5:30.
You ran down the steps and opened the door to be greeted by your boyfriend holding two bouquets and a bottle of wine as your mother followed closely behind you. Ransom was looking more handsome than usual, if that was even possible, with his signature sweater and carefully styled hair. You preferred it floofy and a little messy, as it was most mornings, but it was perfect for your mom to see him.
Ransom handed you the bottle of wine as he leaned in to kiss your cheek. “You look beautiful, Sweetheart.” You blushed and gestured toward your mom with your free hand.
“Mom, this is Ransom, Ransom, I’d like you to mee-“
Before you could even finish the introduction, she cut you off. “Mom, you can call me Mom, dear. It’s so great to meet you.” Ransom laughed and handed her a bouquet of flowers with charm before she pulled him in for a hug. You raised your eyebrows in surprise at the greeting. You’d never seen her be this welcoming before, even when your sister brought her husband home for the first time. Ransom looked over his shoulder at you and winked as your mother dragged him into the living room to meet the rest of the family.
You made your way to the kitchen with the bottle of wine, catching your dad who was finishing up the meal.
“Hey Dad, Ransom just got here. Need any help finishing up?” He looked up from the pot he was stirring and squinted to read the label on the bottle of wine in your hands.
“Ah, that’s a good one. Why don’t you pull out some glasses and open it up so we can get it airing. Would you be a dear and help me take this all out to the table? I’m gonna go introduce myself.”
You nodded and got to work running the dishes out to the dining room.
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Dinner with Ransom went off without a hitch. He was a perfect gentleman without it seeming forced, engaging in conversation with your family with ease. Every topic he brought up complimented you and touched on your best moments with each other, your sister and her husband chiming in on their similar experiences and your parents looking at the two of you with approval and admiration.
When it was time to go, your parents made you each a bag full of leftovers, insisting you’d both have dinners for the whole week. You smiled and happily took them, waving goodbye until they closed the door behind you. Ransom grabbed your hand, still keeping a respectful amount of distance between your bodies before walking you to the other side of his Beamer. He opened the passenger door for you before he grabbed the bag of food out of your hands and placed it in the back along with his. He leaned into the car, finally out of the line of sight of your parents’ windows as he buckled you into your seat. As he leaned back, he kissed you on the cheek again before nosing against your neck.
“You smell good. So good I almost went crazy when I first got here.” He pulled back, pupils blown with lust, swallowing his icy irises, as he leaned in with his arm resting against the roof of the car.
“Now let’s take you home so I can take you apart.”
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shadylex · 2 days
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Knives Out such a fucking good movie
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street-of-mercy · 5 days
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puipui-official · 1 year
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"Un-uhlaive? UN-UHLAIVE? Ma'am, that man has been killed. He has been MUHDUHED. To DEATH."
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animentality · 2 months
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ironmaodhan · 1 year
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rian johnson i am begging you to reconsider the knives out x muppet crossover
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nicostiel · 1 year
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#they're married okay
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may-darling · 1 year
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I find it absolutely hilarious that after playing the popularised sexy man “James Bond” for what feels like a millennium, Daniel Craig has only now reached tumblr sexy man status by playing a funky southern gay detective with a hubby that bakes sour bread. If this is not the most on brand tumblr thing I don’t know what is
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ayo-edebiri · 1 year
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Glass Onion + Masks (insp)
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departmentq · 1 year
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jay-wasstuff · 1 year
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Source: Screen Rant
Phillip makes bread (get it?) for trophy husband Benoit
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krasnyel · 1 year
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regular ascot-loving-mystery-solving family
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erosia-rhodes · 1 year
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Actual Google results for “World’s Greatest Detective”:
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iimr3 · 1 year
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*hitting you with a stick* no benoit blanc movies should not interact. they should not lead up to something. you need to detox from the marvel/sherlock bbc poisoning. they should be completely independent movies (maybe w some cameos/little references for fun) and go on for as long as there are stories rian johnson wants to tell in this universe. i do not want an overarching plot i do not want a team up i dont want a benoit-focused prequel i want some good old fashioned episodic murder mysteries that have nothing to do with each other!!!!!!!!!!! also rian johnson has literally said he's not gonna do a prequel and he wants the movies to all stand on their own
addendum 1: by "marvel/sherlock bbc poisoning" i dont mean that those caused this over-serialization, but i think they are partially responsible for why audiences are expecting it. learn to engage w murder mysteries on the genre's own terms
addendum 2: idc what headcanons you have. i actively encourage you to write fanfic about marta and helen solving crime if you wanna. that is literally what fanfiction is for my guy! if you want to know how phillip and benoit met THAT IS WHY FANFIC EXISTS
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