#know-it-all-babe | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

calvinandhobbes · 1 year

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ik we all want to be covered in blood but which way sounds the best: splattered across your face, dripping out of your mouth or poured over you carrie-style?

#normal questions to ask on tumblr.com/dashboard #mine is dripping from my mouth obviouslyyyy #down the chin babe!!#‘i know we all want to be covered in blood’ i state sincerely

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inkskinned · 7 months

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love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.

love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.

love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.

love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.

maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.

recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.

#writeblr #warm up #ps edited so it is more clear where “half” of men is coming from:#15% literally don't even touch water #an ADDITIONAL 35% ''wash'' by just running their hands under water WITHOUT SOAP #15+35 =50%#like that is not washing ur hands. go back and use soap #btw the numbers for women are 4% never washing and 15% ''just water''#which is still gross but like. sooo much better yikes #ps i know we're all gay on this site but watching ppl ''correct'' my math on this has been wild #i have a learning disability im genuinely bad at math so i check EVERY time someone corrects me #but no they're just confidently wrong.....#182 hours is a week babes. 182/24 (number of hours in a day) is ~7.6 #that's where i got that number from. also from rent we know there's 168 hours in a week.#ALSO btw if u read this and ur response is ''men are also struggling rn tho'' like babe you missed the point of it tho #this doesn't even make fun of men it's legit just pointing out that bigotry against women isn't founded #in anything men actually CARE about . like they don't actually CARE about ''being clean'' when they make fun of armpit hair #or they would be WASHING THEIR HANDS.#men pretend to be rollin' in cash and Apex Predators and instead they are trained to be lazy and unwilling to act in emergencies #i have never and will never make fun of men for asking for more support on important topics like DV and mental health.#this is so clearly not about men; it's about how common just being plainly misogynistic has become.#like they don't try to hide it anymore.

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autoneurotic · 5 months

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#ALL U DO IS SUBTRACT 12 FROM THE CURRENT HOUR BABES BTW #14:55-12:00=02:55 #because we use 12 hour so that’s why u subtract 12 u see #i feel like almost everywhere other than american is hip with 24 hr time which is why i specified it like this #i’m american and i understand and use (and prefer) 24 hr #most people i know get it but hate it #wait did you know also they make twenty four hour ANALOGUE clocks #need one

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lazylittledragon · 25 days

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hey idk which anxious pre-t babe needs to hear this but i didn't get to when i was younger so. testosterone will not make you ugly. it won't make you a horrible person. it won't 'mutilate' or ruin your body. if you want to go on testosterone then literally all that happens is it makes you really fucking hot and REALLY fucking happy.

#ramble #literally very hot. like very hot #there is so much sweat #'oh you're just trying to paint a pretty picture that it's all fine' yeah i am!!! it's fucking great. i love it #trans people aren't sad clueless little babes who don't know what's going on. if you want to go on hormones you Know what it's going to do #and you WANT THAT WHICH IS WHY YOU'RE DOING IT #i hate hate hate seeing detransitioners like 'it destroyed and mutilated me'#*proceeds to list the normal effects of hormones*#it's all fearmongering and it's SICK #personally i think we should start glorifying transition more. because it's BEAUTIFUL

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muppetminge · 3 months

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wow i love twitter sm.

on a serious note - i think it's funny to portray women not wearing make-up as silly and childish when you're the one apparently caring so much about what other people are doing to their faces.

ask yourself: why do you find bare faces not appropriate for formal events? why does it bother you to see a woman without makeup? how does it effect you? why do you think it effects you?

you're so insistent that there are no societal pressures at play, that women are doing this exclusively for themselves and for the joy of it - then where does this urge to force it on women who don't find joy in it come from? why does it annoy you to see women in their natural way of being? it's a choice, but also there's a right choice, apparently, and anyone stepping out of line shoud be promptly shamed into submission. right?

"a little (whatever) never hurt anybody" okay and neither does a bare face. grow up.

#mona mona mona #anti beauty culture #anti beauty industry #anti makeup #feminism #radfem #every week i see some variation of “every woman should know how to do (specific kind of makeup)” or “i can't take grown women who don't do #seriously" or straight-up shaming women for the crime of having a face and not painting it over to start over #also this attitude that “it's only little x” you say that about everything!!!!!!!!!!! a little of this here and a little of this there and #bit of this and that. that's a full face babe!#also i literally don't care! i don't give a shit about how litte whatever i don't want to do a little of anything. at all.

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rythyme · 5 months

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is anyone gonna tell f1 tumblr that the first ever live action omegaverse show is a sports drama about gay racecar drivers. because that feels like something they'd want to know.

#did they intentionally schedule the premiere the same day as the las vegas gran prix #bc if so that's SO funny #''happy race day! here's episode 1! i know we said it wasn't omegaverse but um. we lied ❤️''#f1 #las vegas gp #las vegas gp 2023 #formula 1 #pit babe the series #lgbt drama #thai drama #pit babe #sorry i just cannot handle this in silence. if I'm gonna lose my mind over this then I'm taking you all down with me #omegaverse #theo.txt #100 #500 #1k #pbts #2k

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strawberrybyers · 4 months

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being a slut and mentally ill means i’d do really well as a patient in arkham asylum

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banghwa · 8 months

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each other's safety zone 💛

#userbangtan #armysource #btsgif #btsdaily #bts #park jimin #jung hoseok #jihope #**2018-2020-ass gif colouring here sorry #**anyways when jhope said wheres my safe zone babe. i think we all know. wtv.#*creations #*gifs #mon trésor #chouchou #oh my god they were roommates

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super-nova5045 · 5 days

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sylvia plath, todd anderson and virginia woolf (aka ACTUAL tortured poets) watching taylor “im breaking up with my boyfriend for his intense depression and blaming it on him, im dating a racist who enjoys watching woc being brutalized and harasses young woc artists, i sent my fans out on a hate train to attack a young woc actress for a line she had to say as part of her job to show how mentally ill her character was, im dating a maga supporter, i refuse to say anything about a current genocide despite being the most influential person in the world right now, i am a billionaire, i fly 13 minute flights and have the highest carbon emission of any celebrity, i am a known white feminist who only speaks about issues when it affects me and has constantly let my fans get away with extreme racism and even encouraged it by associating myself with known racists” swift call herself a tortured poet (her writing sounds like a bunch of thesaurus words slapped over gabba hanna and rupi kaur-esque poetry that was created purely as a trinket for an edgy pinterest board)

#anti taylor swift #like she can be problematic that’s okay #there are SO many problematic artists i like #but she’s not even that good #like read sylvia plath or virginia woolf or listen to LDR or fiona apple or mitski or lorde or boygenius or olivia rodrigo #aka her peers #and realise how much better they are #they truly write art because they have a compassion and rawness for it #whereas taytay only writes to get more money LOL #she’s so extremely privileged that her life is not at all relatable and now she tries to make it so #by romanticizing the most mundane #thats never been your brand babe now it’s going to sound like dogshit #GUTS by olivia rodrigo is better because it has such an intensity to it. liv means what she says and you can feel it!#fiona apple means what she says when she writes about begging her lover to love her back!#mitski means what she says when she writes that she is self destructive and puts herself in bad situations since that’s all she knows!#lana means what she says when she writes about her suicide attempt at 15 because of constant abuse from her mother and crippling depression #all of it such haunting and beautiful works because it truly comes from the soul and isn’t a cash grab #Anyway i’m so sorry virginia and sylvia and todd #todd anderson #AND JOE ALWYN #joe alwyn my favourite man ever #joe alwyn #dead poets society #anderperry #sylvia plath #virginia woolf #the bell jar #lana del rey #fiona apple #mitski

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astronicht · 21 days

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one of the interesting things about actually reading the lotr books for the first time, age 30 and post grad school, is i genuinely cannot judge how much average (or big!) fans of Tolkien know about the historical works he's borrowing from and retelling, and the words he's pulling straight from ancient languages, and the poems he's cheerfully loosely translating into modern English-- etc etc. I am an early medievalist by training! I read "athelas" being a healing plant and laugh bc of course it's just called "noble" -- which in turn is a pretty traditional way to name healing plants lmao. Frankly, I assume that I'm not catching more than a third of what JRR is laying down, in historical storyworlds alone. Hell, maybe I’m wrong about how he intended to use athelas (athel— prefix does mean noble in Old English tho, I’ve translated that too many times).

BUT I don't really know how to excitedly yell abt it bc I don't want to preach shit everyone knows, bc that sucks for us all. but if ppl DON'T know the fun history stuff I want to be a little more specific when I yell about stuff? Because it is so great! No matter whether you already know leagues more than me or whether you have, like i originally did, absolutely zero basis in the medieval stories that invented what we now call medieval fantasy. (Like. Look, I once asked my British friend if Merlin was a historical person and then I almost immediately became a medievalist in some sort of cosmic joke, so I have seen all the sides of this scale! but as a consequence I have no idea where everyone else is.)

#astro lotr #please feel free to be like babe we know all of this #one thing ur safe from is linguistics i don't know shit about linguistics

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luna-lovegreat · 2 months

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Currently obsessed with the idea that the boys go to Time for love advice, since "he's married so he knows this stuff right?"

I mean they couldn't recognize a wedding ring??? And neither did he???

And time was saying this in his youth I mean cmon

Twilight: So ancestor. What would you do if like. Malon left to another world and never came back

Time: ... bro Malon called me fairy boy and then we were married like what

Hyrule: So uhh old man. How does one. Meet a girl.

Time: By speaking to her I guess? Or not, Malon did the talking for me

Hyrule: riiiiight...

Wild *no tact*: Hey so like... what if your redheaded wife who's name started with M died.

Time: what?!?!

Wild, undeterred: but like before she proposed.

Time: ...

Wild: and you don't remember if you would have said yes. What's your advice for dealing with that?

Time: ... vent to a fairy?

Warriors: hey old man

Time: no no no not this one asking me please

Warriors: how do I get women to stop coming after me. So I can ya know. Choose without war trying to force me into relationships

Time: I can safely say I've never had that problem captain

Wars: of course not *smirks*

Wars: ok but seriously how do I make them go away

Time: ... wear a wedding ring so they think you're taken, I've got a shiny extra

Time: no no why- they won't stop, I don't know how to do love!

Time: ok well at least I have legend. That kid would never ask for advice, I'll sit by him.

Legend: so old man.

Time, looking forward to a normal conversation: yeah?

Legend: hypothetically, what would you do if you found out Malon didn't exist.

Legend: And her whole world didn't, but it did, and now it doesn't

Time: ...Excuse me for a minute.

Time, writing a letter as fast as he can: MALON HOW DO I GIVE LOVE ADVICE THEY THINK IM WISE

Malon: lol

Happy Valentine's Day guys, have a headcanon :P

The boys go to Time for love advice and Time spouts whatever wise-sounding bs he can, before shoving them all on Malon for therapy when they visit the ranch

Art and comic by Jojo @linkeduniverse! :D