#kubo take all the time you need

[tentacle-therapissed]

I’m so glad the Guillermo Del Toro Pinocchio movie is being received really well, because it was literally my most anticipated movie of the year! So here’s some fun facts about the crew, concept, and production that got me excited about this movie and that I think would excite much of tumblr as well:

-the screenplay was cowritten by Del Toro and Patrick McHale, creator of Over The Garden Wall and a writer on Adventure Time.

-the movie was codirected by Mark Gustasfon, who was the animation director of Wes Anderson’s Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)

-the primary art/animation designers of this movie (production designer Curt Enderle, art director Robert DeSue, character designer Georgina Hayns, animation supervisor Brian Leif Hansen, and photography director Frank Passingham) previously worked on projects that include Coraline, the Corpse Bride, Paranorman, Isle of Dogs, Frankenweenie, Kubo, and Chicken Run.

-Besides Netflix, it was produced by the Henson company (always a good sign when you’re doing anything with puppets) and ShadowMachine, who have produced a lot of Adult Swim shows including Robot Chicken, Moral Orel, and Tuca and Bertie, as well as the Netflix original BoJack Horseman.

-Del Toro was inspired to make this adaptation due to the similarities he’d always noticed between the original Pinocchio story and Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. Both are about a man-made character’s relationship with his father/creator, and his attempts to understand what it means to be human. This inspiration is why the film takes on a gothic feel at times.

-the movie is over 10 years in the making. Del Toro announced the project in 2008 and production began in 2012, but it went into development hell and no further updates were made for several years. Del Toro has described it as his passion project, saying "I've wanted to make this movie for as long as I can remember.”

-the backdrop of Mussolini’s Italy was intended to show how Pinnochio was able to find his own humanity and will in a time where everyone else was acting like a blindly obedient puppet. Del Toro wanted to deviate from the original book’s themes of obeying authority by making his Pinocchio virtuous for questioning the rules and forging his own set of morals. (Also if you know anything about Del Toro, the guy likes to dunk on fascism.)

-Del Toro didn’t feel the need to have Pinocchio become flesh-and-blood at the end of the movie, saying all you need to be a real human is to behave like one.

I was lucky enough to see this movie in 35 mm in a movie theatre on Thanksgiving weekend. If there are any movie theatre showings near you and you’re in a position to be able to attend them, I would totally recommend it especially if you can go with loved ones. It was a gorgeous, heartwarming, and magical movie to experience on a big screen and perfect for the late fall/winter holiday season.

#i was so mad all year when i referenced this movie and ppl had only heard of the disney live action or shitty pauly shore versions #pinocchio #guillermo del toro #patrick mchale #over the garden wall #cartoon network #adult swim #wes anderson #fantastic mr fox #bojack horseman #tuca and bertie #moral orel #robot chicken #frankenstein #mary shelly's frankenstein #mary shelley #coraline #the corpse bride #frankenweenie #kubo #paranorman #isle of dogs #chicken run #adventure time

[ichinoue]

Thoughts? Fullbring is the ability of love and it only opened for Rukia when it could have been used for his future wife

https://twitter.com/IchiRukispace/status/1696175283471094148?t=0sn-UOrhFYVyFzRgvXHhyQ&s=19

I mean, I feel like they're leaping over the object affinity in regards to fullbrings (i.e. the love of the object), as well as taking Chad's speech about pride and replacing it with love.

Quoting from the bleach wiki on fullbrings:

Object Affinity: By developing an affinity for a particular object, a Fullbringer can alter its form, granting powers that vary greatly among individuals. This affinity can be defined by one’s love for the object in question, or simply by an overall fondness for it. As such, this power is usually awakened through a strong emotion associated with the object, such as pride. Using this affinity, Fullbringers pull out the object’s soul and boost it with their own, transforming it in the process. 

Riruka says that you're drawing out the maximum power of something a person loves, a physical object. Ginjo loved his pendant, Riruka loved so many things she collected them in a dollhouse.

So Ichigo tries to think of a physical object that he loves or is attached to, or that's with him all the time, and obviously it ends up being his shinigami badge. Because that's what he loves, what that badge represents--protecting.

Chad then tells Ichigo to use pride. Not love, but pride. Unlike with the object affinity, the word love is never used here. And even if it were, I feel that people tend to conflate Kubo's use of "love" and "the heart" with romantic love, when it's about the bonds between people (as seen in Kaien's speech, and six hearts beat as one, etc.) Chad tells him to think of moments that he took pride in his soul reaper powers (and not, as you see, to think of the person he's supposedly in love with lmao). To which Ichigo responds there's too many moments/he felt pride all along, remembering multiple instances of his nakama, and Rukia is the last thought, rightfully so, as she is the one who gave Ichigo those powers in the first place, and her disappearing before his eyes was a representation of those powers being lost.

So, I think they're conflating what Riruka said about love of the object (the badge) with romantic love being the emotion Ichigo used to draw out the power of that object. But instead of love, Ichigo drew on pride. Or you could even say that he drew on pride as well as love, his love of protecting, of being a shinigami because that meant he could protect. But romantic love? That's not what's being presented here.

Nor would it make sense for that to be presented, given that Kubo said that romance is only supplementary in Bleach. The platonic, nakama bonds and "the power of friendship!!" like what Ichigo has with Rukia, is obviously going to be the one at the forefront in a moment like this, not the romantic bond with a love interest/future wife (although it's worth noting Orihime was shown twice in his memories of pride). She's there, but she's not at the forefront, and that's okay, because she is where the romance was at, and Bleach is a shounen. Kubo wasn't going to put Ichigo and his future wife front and center all the time when romance wasn't the focus. That's basic shounen formula, and people need to understand this lol

But, as per usual, IR fans always try to rewrite Ichigo's most notable trait--his desire to protect--as a desire to be with Rukia. Even towards the end of this arc, when he thinks he's lost his powers once again and is crying in the rain about how helpless he feels that he can't protect anyone...they still think he's crying about Rukia lol.

#IchiHime

[sashi-ya]

🌸 ▹𝙱𝚢𝚊𝚔𝚞𝚢𝚊'𝚜 𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚒 𝙱𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝙲𝚎𝚕𝚎𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝐇𝐂𝐬: 𝐁𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

▹ headcanons of our sweet noble being a dad. tw: well, pregnancy of course. careful a little spoiler, if you don't know who Ichika is, then just ignore this, please. sfw. these are simple headcanons, the way I imagine Byakuya be with a baby and based on how Kubo addressed he acts with and towards Ichika ▹ wc: 800

Byakuya would like to have just one child. Is not he is not interested in having a million with you, but, he knows that he wants to give that baby all the love and attention as possible, and sharing isn’t an option. At least during the first years of the baby’s life.

He would, for the love of God we all know he would, ask for his servants to craft the exact replicas of his own attire in baby size. From kenseikan (which you will have to remind him that babies have no long hair), a mini gimpaku (mint green, of course) to tiny, tiny white gloves embroidered with the Kuchiki clan symbol.

Speaking of the Kuchiki clan emblem, everything in the baby’s trousseau will have it on. White, pure cotton, hypoallergenic, as expensive as ten manors. You told him it isn’t necessary, but you know it’s futile. Nobody deserves the best than his own family, and he will give you even more.

You will wake up one day, and you will see your son/daughter dressed in some kind of green blorb attire; yes, Byakuya design an onesie with Wakame Ambassador for his baby. No, you aren’t taking it away. Yes, he will hire a photographer to make a special photography session with his descendant dressed in that. A photo he will put in his own office next to an Ichika one he took one day when they were training with their Zanpakuto. Cause proud uncle, always.

And Wakame Ambassador will be present everywhere too. From plushies, the first one personally sewed and embroidered by him. The baby, carrying the Kuchiki blood, will obviously cling to it for dear life. And you couldn’t ask for more, seeing baby and dad sleeping on your bed with the plushie in between them? Yes please, someone draw it.

He won’t be an absent nor cold father. Contrary to what many people might think, Byakuya is a person who really takes time to be with his family. Same as he attends the many events and reunions when his sister isn’t able to attend, he will be there for his baby. Since the Quincy invasion, he has changed for the better, and the moment his dark sky eyes meet his newborn’s he will melt, to the point of showing the sweetest smile you’ve ever seen drawn in his lips.

Byakuya will lift his baby in arms, with utmost care and pure delicacy. He would look, inspect every corner of his own blood, and then snuggle the baby in his arms. The moment he feels the chubby cheeks of his newborn against his chest, it will mark the start of the most pure bond nobody will dare to break nor even threat. He will swear -in silence- that will protect his descendant with everything it takes.

The noble will try to train his kid since baby, but he won’t be able to be really strict. Same as happened with Ichika, his child will become his weakness. Some times you will have to scold him for letting the kid do whatever he wants with him. Byakuya looks like a cold one, but in reality he would count the hours all throughout the working day to go back to you and his baby. He wants to play, to laugh with you two… he might not tell you, and probably he will never do, but with him words aren’t necessary.

Then, when the baby becomes old enough to attend the academy (cause of course the next head of the Kuchiki clan is not only strong as hell, but also has inherited dad’s sense of service, responsibility and novelty) there will be some weeks of pure chaos. “NO, HE WILL BE HOME-SCHOOLED!” Byakuya will shout. “Honey, he needs to make friends. I know you’ve been home-schooled, but, don’t you think he/she/they deserves to experience the academy, make new friends and perhaps even found a lover?” the last part was just to tease him, but, after so many nights discussing (and perhaps so many kisses to convince him) he gives up. His baby is gonna attend the Shinigami academy, and he wouldn’t be more proud of everything his son/daughter does.

Oh, and speaking of which… he will pick up, personally, his little bundle of joy. Some people will feel a little intimidated that the sixth captain of the Gotei 13 is there with his cold stare and his golden noble things, but he is gonna become an active member of the organization just to make the academy an even better place for his child. (And also, because he has met the joy of gossiping with other parents while waiting for his child to get out of class)

Byakuya will be the happiest man in the world. The proudest father. His baby, his weakness and also his strength. His genes will run stronger in the kid, and, some afternoons you will be happy to see through the window at both battling with wooden swords, with smiles on their faces and a happy ending with no end for a soul who suffered so much… 💖

#byakuya kuchiki x reader #kuchiki byakuya x reader #byakuya x reader #byakuya kuchiki imagine #byakuya x you #kuchiki byakuya #byakuya kuchiki x you #kuchiki byakuya x you #byakuya #kuchiki byakuya imagine #byakuya kuchiki #bleach #bleach headcanons #bleach imagines #bleach byakuya #sashi ya #byakuya smut #bleach x reader

[pedripics]

Pedri talking to various Asian media outlets recently:

You are one of the most eye-catching midfielders among the young generation, and you are now taking on more tasks in the club and national team. How do you ensure your playing status and efficiency in frequent matches? Which goal are you most eager to achieve for yourself in 2024?

"Personally, I want to win the championship in the two competitions we are still participating in, namely La Liga and the Champions League. In order to achieve this goal, we train hard every day."

Which Asian players have you come into contact with during your youth training and career? Which Asian player impressed you most in the game? What stories do you have with him? What are your impressions of China and Chinese football?

"Kubo. He performs very well in La Liga and has also trained with Barcelona before. I think he is a very skilled player. I still have his jersey at home. I think the game in China is a game that is still growing, there are a lot of very good players, and I believe it will get better and better in the years to come."

Previously, Xavi announced his resignation after the season. How would you evaluate him as a coach and club legend?

"Whether as a coach or as a legendary player of the club, Xavi is an idol and a role model for all of us. In the two years he coached, our team has changed a lot. Last year we won the championship together La Liga champions, we will also strive to do our best for the rest of the season."

What goals will you and the team have for the rest of the season?

"In the league, I hope to play as many games as possible because we still retain the hope of competing for the title; in the Champions League, we will do our best to win the next knockout round and strive to go further."

You played in the Champions League knockout round for the first time this season and provided an assist. How do you feel? In your opinion, is the competition in the knockout stages of the Champions League much more intense than the competitions you have participated in before?

"Yes, in the knockout stage we are now in, the pace of the game is much faster. Compared with the group stage, there is of course a big difference. Of course, I am very happy to be able to play in this game, and I am also very satisfied to be able to send this assist to help the team."

The emergence of Lamine this season shocked everyone, and you have already played in the professional league at Lamine's current age. What advice would you give to Lamine?

"First of all, I advise him to stay calm. It is a great thing to be able to participate in the professional league at this age. He is already an excellent professional football player. It doesn't matter if he doesn't perform well sometimes, as long as he continues to train hard. I will provide him with all the help he needs. He just needs to face everything calmly and enjoy football."

Xavi will no longer be Barcelona's coach after this season. We know that you have a very good relationship with him. Can you tell us what help Xavi gave you during his coaching period?

"Xavi gave me a lot of help as a coach, and as a legendary player of the club, especially playing in the same midfield position as me, he gave me a lot of advice on organizing the team's attacks. Overall I learned a lot from him, his experience and his guidance."

When you were 18 years old, you played 73 official games in one season. Many people marvelled at your physical strength, but did you also feel tired? Do you think players today are overloaded with matches?

"After playing so many games in a year, of course, I felt tired, but during that time, I was always just excited to play. This was also the first time I had the opportunity to represent the club and the national team in so many important games. Now I consider this a very valuable and unforgettable experience. I agree that there are a lot of games now and players are under a lot of physical pressure, but at the same time we will make more preparations for this and do everything possible to maximize our physical condition."

Laporta recently mentioned in an interview that Barcelona will continue to fight for the league and Champions League this season, and everything is possible. Do you agree with this statement, or from a practical and technical perspective, which goal do you think has greater certainty?

"I think we still have the possibility of competing for the title in both competitions. La Liga, relatively speaking, is more difficult, but at the same time, it is also longer and has more games, so anything can happen. Of course, I agree with what the president has said. We are still competitive in these games and we will do our best to fight for these two championships in the rest of the season."

As more and more outstanding young players join the first team, as one of the representatives, do you think this youth team can lead Barcelona back to the top in the future?

"That's right, we are a group of very young players, whether they are young players who have joined the team or young players training at La Masia, I can see a bright future in them, so I very much believe that with our help, the team can return to the top and perhaps even created a more beautiful future than ever before."

Did you encounter any difficulties when you first joined Barcelona, ​​such as adapting to the team? Adapting to a new environment?

"To be honest, the first division is much more intense and faster-paced than the second division, and the opponents’ skills are much better. I was lucky enough not to encounter any difficulties when I first joined the team. The atmosphere in the locker room was very good. My teammates, everyone at the club, especially the captains, have given me a lot of help and I am very grateful to them."

Do you feel that you are already a mature player on the court, such as your playing style, decisions you make, etc.?

"I am still very young, and although I already gained a lot of experience in various games, including making changes and making decisions during the game, I feel that I still have a long way to go. There's a lot to learn and I think I will eventually become a really mature player after many more years at the club."

What advice do you have for children who like playing football?

"If I give advice to children who like football, my biggest advice is to enjoy football and play this sport with your friends. Don’t care about the results, don’t care about the level, don’t care about whether you can become a professional player in the future. Just enjoy it and be happy."

Barcelona's young players like Lamine, Cubarsi, Roque and others have gradually become important members of the team. Although you are still very young, you have become a senior for them. What will you do to lead or take care of these young players?

"I will do everything I can to help them, support them in everything they do, and make them feel comfortable in this team. When they need any advice, have any questions or want to know something, they can come and ask me. I want the whole locker room to be like a big family. When they need my help, I will do my best to help them."

In recent games, coach Xavi assigned you as a left winger. What is the reason for this? How is it different from playing in midfield?

"The team now has a lot of midfielders, and as a player who can run a lot, I can create spaces in attack for the team. Being a left-winger is, of course, very different from playing in midfield, but I think this position is also very interesting. I can have a lot of touches to create offensive opportunities for the team."

You have suffered from constant muscle injuries in the past two seasons. How do you deal with injuries and what kind of adjustments have you made?

"Injuries are the worst part of football. I dealt with a lot of pain, and in order to reduce that trouble, I did a lot of activities to reduce that. I took up Pilates training, and increased the frequency of going to the gym to adjust and to avoid repeated injuries."

What do you think are the problems with the team this season compared to last season's La Liga championship?

"I think the biggest problem the team encounters is on the defensive end. We still score a lot of goals this season and have a similar offensive level as last year, but we lost more points due to defensive problems. Regarding Xavi leaving the team, this is his personal choice and we will do our best with him during the rest of the season."

Last season we saw that you had more opportunities to get into the penalty area and attack the goal directly, but this season it seems to be less and less. Is it a tactical role change? From a personal perspective, which style of play do you prefer?

"It is true that I don’t have many opportunities to enter the penalty area and shoot directly this season, but I am also trying to find other ways to help the team score goals. For example, provide some key assist opportunities and find other ways to play the ball. From a personal point of view, I like both playing styles. I have been looking for ways to optimize the team's attack in various positions."

#pedri #pedri gonzalez #fc barcelona #fc barça #barça #*interview

[rays-of-fire-and-ice]

For What the Future Holds

Prompt: forgiveness

Rating: K/General with mild themes

Setting: Starts Ichigo defeats Yhwach, continues into the very beginning of the ten year time skip. There’s also flashbacks to Toshiro and Momo's past dotted throughout.

Synopsis: Momo notices Toshiro is acting out of sorts ever since the war against the Quincy ended. Meanwhile, Toshiro tries to look to the future.

AN: It’s finally DONE!!

I had the idea for this ages ago (around the time of Horizons, which is why they have a similar structure as you’ll see), but it wasn’t until the 'forgiveness' prompt for the @yearoftheotpevent came up that I finally sat down and wrote it out. It didn't turn out to be the main or overarching theme and the fic itself turned into quite the emotional piece to write ^^;

This was also partly written in light of my headcanon becoming canon! I was aware of the question from Klub Outside a long time ago, but Kubo has confirmed Toshiro and Momo were neighbours rather than living under the same roof, which has always been the scenario I saw for them when I was reading BLEACH and writing fic.

Finally, this fic also has a flashback that slightly ties into When the Souls Sleep and the World is Our Own, but only in that it was a deleted scene and I found a way to include it here instead. You don’t have to read that fic to understand what happens in that scene, just that the setting is not long after they met.

Anyhow, I hope you all enjoy it!

____________________________

“I should’ve told you about it earlier.”

Momo blinks, both at the quietness of Toshiro’s voice and the bowing of his head in her peripheral. She raises her gaze to his face from the now healed over wound on his arm, cancelling the kido as she shifts over to sit next to him. “Told me about what?”

He rolls the tattered sleeve down. He contemplates what to say, staring down at his lap. Behind him, Hyourinmaru’s hilt glints, and beyond, Shinji and Kyouraku watch over those they’d dug out from the ruins earlier. Next to them, Nanao is communicating with someone in the Seireitei – Iemura, Momo suspects – trying to coordinate transportation for the injured, and Isane, bandaged up and still recovering from her own injuries, heals Aikawa. Far away at the Reio’s Palace, she can sense Rukia about to be reunited with her brother.

“That form is why I was training in the caves,” Toshiro says, diverting Momo’s attention back to him. “I should’ve told you about it sooner.

“You mean Hyourinmaru’s Completed Form?”

He nods.

Was that all? She thinks to tease him, to make light of something he seems to be treating with more seriousness than needed, but she halts at his gaze. It’s not the usual icy, determined one she’s used to.

He’s tired – and who could blame him after what they’d gone through? – and it makes him look vulnerable. Something trembles within him, something he’d likely keep hidden behind many walls.

She offers a sympathetic smile. “Why would you need to tell me about it?”

“The way you reacted before…you were startled. If you’d known before, it wouldn’t have been as much of a shock. I apologise.”

It’s true, she’d been stunned, had even flinched with a loud gasp when she first saw him, and was perhaps even a little frightened. She’d stood there, mouth agape and speechless, unable to take her eyes away from him, even as her captain swore and asked who he was. She hadn’t known how else to react, but later as he motioned her towards a piece of rubble to sit on as he explained how he had somehow become an adult, the shock wore off.

She had to resist the urge to hug him out of sheer relief, this was not the time or place for such high emotions. So she’d gotten to work on healing his wounds after he’d transformed back – but only after the others had been found and pulled out from under the rubble.

“It’s all right,” she reassures. “It was startling, yes, but I knew it was you. It was incredible, actually, but also not too surprising now that I know what it is."

He’s stunned, but hides it quickly with a clearing his throat and a deepened frown. “How so?”

“I didn’t see all of the battle you and Captain Kuchiki did with the Quincy, but what I did see was amazing. You froze the Quincy’s shield in mid-air, within a second. A-And then you froze the Quincy completely! I thought for sure he was defeated then, truly.”

He nods to himself, remembering. “So did I. He gave us more than we bargained for in the end.”

 “At least he’s gone.” Momo sighs, and with it, a weight is released. “At least…it’s over.” It’s like a vice has loosened around her head and chest. She lets out a shuddering breath and her eyes become watery. “We’re okay, now.”

“We’ll have a lot to do when we get back, it’s not…” Toshiro trails off when he meets her gaze again. His hand twitches at his side, clearly resisting moving it. After a beat, his lips shape into a faint smile and he let’s out a short, tired chuckle. “You gonna cry, bed-wetter?”

She can’t even be mad at the nickname, she becoming too overwhelmed. “No, it’s not the time and place to.” Even as she says this, she’s furiously wiping her eyes on her sleeve.

He shrugs. “No one would blame you.”

“But it’s like you said, we need to focus on the task at hand.” She gestures to the others a short distance away. “On transporting the injured back and figuring out what our next steps are.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” His smile widens a fraction. “I won’t tell anyone.”

Despite herself, she can’t help but grin back. She sniffs and looks down. “I’m just so glad it’s over.”

He only nods with a hum.

A silence passes between them, and Momo slowly realises her own exhaustion. She has enough energy to cast lower powered kido, but even then she might be pushing it. She finds herself sitting back against the same piece of broken wall Toshiro is, listening to the distant chatter amongst their friends and wreckage crumbling and falling. She cranes her neck on the rubble’s edge, looking up at the sky.

She’d seen him soar across it hours ago, only a spec at times, and a more recognisable figure at others. At one point, the cold of his reiatsu had washed over her like a gust in a blizzard, freezing and chilling her to bone. It ebbed away minutes later, but it made her realise the magnitude of his powers. She'd wondered if he had this power this entire time and had chosen not to unveil it until now, when he needed it most to protect the Soul Society. If he was capable of this now, who knew what he could achieve in the future.

But then her mind rolls into another thought, one that makes heat rush up the back of her neck to her ears and try to suppress a chuckle.

“What is it?”

By this point Toshiro had closed his eyes.

“It’s nothing important.”

He opens one eye, unconvinced. “The spike your reiatsu said otherwise.”

She bites the inside of her cheek, chastising herself internally for not keeping it under control. She’s tired, but it’s no excuse. She lets out a small chuckle. “I was thinking that, in a funny way, Hyourinmaru’s Completed Form has given us a glimpse into the future. It’s shown us what you’ll look like when you grow up.”

She had meant it as a tease, to try and lighten the mood, but Toshiro’s frown deepens. As if realising his reaction was unexpected, he let’s out a snort. “Anything can happen between now and then to change how I look.”

The usual bite is not there. The response itself is strange, too.

Before she can ask, her captain comes up to both of them, asking for her help with moving Aikawa’s injured leg into a makeshift splint.

As she rises and leaves with her captain, Toshiro’s smile fades away, and he stares into his lap. No, into something else.

___________________________________

There was a time where future went as far as Granny.

What would she need today? What days was she planning to go out and shop? Would he need to help her with?

When would she pass away?

Toshiro never lingers on that last thought, always distracting himself with whatever he could. At the moment, it’s with sweeping the house and yard.

He’s up to the front porch, pushing the dust and dirt off the edge with the broom. Granny is inside, sewing a new garment together for him.

“You’ve grown again,” she’d remarked earlier with a smile. “You’ll need new clothes now.”

As far as he could tell he hadn’t. The ground seemed to be as far away as it was a week ago, and he hadn’t put on any weight. But he had to admit his clothes the last few days had seemed a fraction shorter at his legs and tighter around his shoulders.

It’s a few minutes later when he hears yelling. A group of children rush past his house, some giggling, others chattering about Momo, who's at the center of attention. She excitedly tells them her application exam date, beaming so wide it must hurt her cheeks.

When was she going to the Academy?

That one stung, and he ignores it with a sweep of the brush.

Months ago, he’d asked Jidanbo what it took to become a Shinigami. The giant was just as surprised as Toshiro had expected him to be.

“Have you changed your mind about not going, Toshiro-kun?” Jidanbo had asked.

“No,” is all he said.

Realising he wasn’t going to elaborated, Jidanbo had shrugged and said, “First, you must have spiritual potential and the ability to show it. You go to the Shinigami Academy, where you learn to become a Shinigami. The exam to get in is tough, sometimes you have to take it multiple times --” he'd rubbed the back of his neck “ -- like I did. My brother was more lucky, he only took the exam once and got in. Once you’ve passed, you’re enrolled in the next semester and that’s about it.”

Toshiro already know even if Momo didn’t get a pass on the exam the first time, she’ll go for it again and again and again, until she was enrolled.

He’d seen her enthusiasm long before this. The day she’d rushed to him, her cheeks flushed and her hair whipped around her from running to find him, and taken him back to his house to show him what she’d just accomplished. She’d cupped her hands together, and several seconds later, a white glow emanated from between the gaps in her fingers. When she’d pulled her hands apart, the orb radiating in her palms broke apart into smaller orbs that floated away. Momo chortled in delight, and Toshiro almost did the same. When she was this joyous it was often contagious, especially when he eyes are so wide with wonder and elation.

What had stopped him was a single thought, one that shot through him and made him realise just how far he’d let her into his life.

One day, she’ll be gone. 

____________________________

The next time Momo sees Toshiro is on her way to the First Division. Shinji runs ahead of her on the walkway, listing off the topics they will need to discuss with Kyoraku. She’d been listening intently, but got distracted as they passed Twelfth Division.

From this high up, she couldn’t recognise most of Shinigami out and about, but the moment she saw one with white hair and a short stature and his cold reiatsu faintly emanated up to her, she knew it was Toshiro. He steps out of Twelfth Division’s main barracks, followed by Rangiku. There’s something morose about the way they hold themselves and in their slow walk to the division’s main gate entrance. They come to a stop just as a building blocks Momo view.

“You all right back there?” Shinji asks.

“Sorry, sir! I just saw Rangiku-san and Captain Hitsugaya.”

“Ah.”

“…Are they coming to this meeting too?”

“Nah, just us, Third, and Eighth.” She can hear his grin when he continues after a beat, “Were you hoping to socialise with them?”

“Of course not!” Momo scoffs.

It’s left at that. Still, she thinks back on how they had looked. She’d be sure to visit them sometime soon, if all goes according to plan with the reconstruction of the Districts.

________________________________

Momo found him sitting on the front porch of his house, peeling chestnuts. He hadn’t noticed her at first, but when her footsteps scrapped against the dirt path, he looks up.

“What’re you staring at?” Toshiro asks.

“Sorry, I just came to visit,” she says as she comes closer. “What are these for?”

He senses there’s more to this than just a visit, but he puts it aside for now. “Baa-chan is making chestnut rice tonight. She was going to ask you to come take some back to your house. She always does it in big batches.”

Momo grins. “That’s kind of her.”

Toshiro only shrugs with a huff. Momo’s grin falls into a small, unsure smile. He’s quick to pick up a nut from the tub in front of him, peel the shell off with a small knife, then put it with the others ready for Granny.

“In that case, do you mind if I help?” Momo says. “I can’t let her do that for me and my friends without helping her.”

“You don’t need to.”

“I want to.”

She makes herself comfortable next to him. She takes a spare knife from the tray he’d brought out, then collects several chestnuts from the tub. He opens his mouth, but shut it after she starts peeling. What had he wanted to say? Did he want to tell her to leave? Did he want to ask about the Academy?

Save for the knifes cracking open and peeling the shells, there’s silence between them. In front of her, the day passes, clouds moving across the sky and the sun shining down on the swaying trees and lively Junrinan a short distance away.

After a moment, Momo pauses as she takes another chestnut. In his periphery, she fiddles with it between her hands, as if trying to wring something out of it. She puts the knife to the chestnut, but is slow to peel the shell away.

She nervous, perhaps gearing herself up to say something. He already knows she’s going to Academy, remembers her loud declaration to Granny several weeks ago that was equal parts ecstatic and anxious. He didn’t want to reflect on his behaviour since she announced it, but he knows he’s become more sullen towards her.

Granny chastised more than once him, saying he should be happier for her and congratulate her; but he can’t ignore the tightness in his chest every time he thinks about her leaving. He hates that she had become a annoying and welcomed constant in his live for the last few decades, and even worse, that he had imagined what the future – whether it was the next week or the next year – would be like, and she was there in his imaginings, along with Granny and Jidanbo. Never used to even think about the future, his life had been repetitive until she came along.

After taking off the chestnut’s shell, Momo stops. “Can I ask you something?”

Toshiro continues peeling. “Hm?”

“Even if you don’t become a Shinigami, can we still be friends?”

Toshiro halts. His brows furrow, but he still doesn’t look at her. “What’s with that question?”

“I mean, while I’m at the Academy we won’t be seeing each other too much. And when I become a Shinigami, it’ll be even less. We’re friends, and, um…I want to stay friends, even when we’ve grown up.”

Her voice wavers towards the end, losing what confidence she’d built up to speak to him.

Toshiro blinks down at the chestnut in his hands. Somewhere around them, the leaves rustle in the wind, and a bird chirps and another caws back in response. The last parts of the shell fall away.

“You might be different by then,” he says solemnly, still unable to look at her.

Momo presses her lips into a tight line. “Well, of course. Everyone changes as they grow up. They become more mature and responsible.”

“Not all adults are.”

“Most though.” She drops her chestnut into the peeled pile. “I don’t know how often I’ll be allowed to visit, but I’ll write to you as often as I can.”

“Don’t bother.”

“Huh?”

“You’ll be doing your Shinigami stuff, you won’t have time.”

“B-But I want to.”

He finally looks at her. At the hurt that flickers through her eyes, he wants to take it back. She obviously hadn’t expected this coldness from him. Yes, his usual bratiness can make him say some hurtful things on occasion, but this is different for her. This was a side of him she rarely saw, and it’s a side she is never on the end of.

But what’s the use? She’ll go to the Academy and forget about him. She’ll make new, better friends. Ones she can go into the future with and who can understand the struggles and triumphs she’ll experience as a Shinigami.

“Do whatever you want then.”

His comment doesn’t ease the turmoil in her, with her gaze falling off to the side and her shoulders slumping. She’s on the verge of a sob, but she bravely keeps it back. “Are you saying you don’t think we should be friends anymore?”

It’s an opening he should take. He has to start letting her go, so it won’t hurt so much when she turns away, and stops being a part of his future.

“I…I’m not saying that.” He’s weak. “I’m just being realistic. You’ll be busy, you won’t have the time to write to us.”

It’s not the answer she expects. Her eyes widen and her lips part, but she doesn’t speak for several heartbeats. She's stuck between being confused and stunned. “I-I’d make time. Of course I’d make time!”

Her earnestness and fierce determination fracture what little resolve he had left. “Well then, let’s see you try.”

_____________________________

Momo glances at Toshiro from across the meeting hall.

He’d just stepped back into line after reporting on his areas for reconstruction. His division is doing well, ahead of schedule in fact.

Normally the thought would make her happy. He’s always been a hard worker; never for the sake of wanting to one-up another or show off, but because he wanted to do good for others. It was one of her favourite things about him.

But something about him is different. The war against the Quincy and taking in the total devastation it had caused had affected all of them, changing each of them in both subtle and obvious ways.

Toshiro holds himself differently. There’s the usual stoicism on his face, and the straight, pulled back shoulders and slightly raised chin that have been a part of his posture since he became a captain.

It’s his hands. They’re curled in loose fists at his side. Something is on his mind, and whatever it is, it’s causing him to be tense. His gaze shows he’s present, now listening to Mayuri give his report into his latest findings, but there’s something going on in the back of his mind he can’t escape from.

She wishes she could cross the room and take one of his hands.

_____________________________

“Don’t bother coming back, bed-wetter!”

Please come back.

And she must see through him, because her high spirits aren’t dampened as she continues to smile and wave at him. He’ll never understand how she can be so cheerful so often.

Eventually, she has to turn away from him and navigate her way through the growing crowds. After she vanishes and as Granny gently chastises him for his rudeness, he can’t dismiss the thought that haunts him. The same thought that had made him try to disconnect from her weeks ago.

What if she doesn’t?

_____________________________

Momo watches Toshiro ponder over the map of the North districts. Each was outlined in the colour of the division that has jurisdiction over them, Fifth Division’s in turquoise and Tenth Division’s in dark green.

“So we’ll tackle this area together,” Shinji says while drawing his finger along the border between the North districts nineteen and twenty. “It makes sense seeing as our jurisdictions are night next to each other. Also, saves us on costs if you go with shared resources, right?”

Both Toshiro and Rangiku nod.

“Have you brought this up with the Captain Commander yet?” Toshiro asks.

“Not yet. We went to a meeting about…” he lifts his gaze to the ceiling of Tenth Division’s office, trying to recall.

“It’s was a month ago, sir,” Momo quietly offers.

Shinji snaps his fingers. “Yes, thank you, Hinamori! Geez, we’ve been to so many meetings lately I’m getting them confused.”

Toshiro scoffs. Momo tries not to smile in response; it’s the first normal, in-character thing she’s seen him do since they arrived.

“Anyway, at that meeting, the Captain Commander suggested a few ways we can save on costs for the reconstruction efforts, one of which was shared resources. Sure you got told the same whenever you went to you met with him yourselves." Shinji jerks his thumb towards Momo. “My lieutenant here suggested we collaborate on the districts that border with other divisions, like yours.”

Momo can’t help but lift her chin a little at the credit her captain gave her. Sometimes he had a way of making one feel accomplished, even over the smallest things.

Rangiku grins. “It’s a great idea, and not surprised that it came from you, Hina-chan.”

Momo laughs nervously. “Rangiku-san…”

“Stop, you’ll make her overheat,” Shinji teases.

“Sir, honestly!” Momo retorts.

He only laughs, but he eyes Toshiro. So he’d noticed it too. Normally situations like this riled her childhood friend up, made him shout something along the lines of ‘We need to focus right now!’ or simply glare at him. Toshiro’s eyes were on the map, jumping to all the districts under his jurisdiction.

It was barely perceptible, but Momo could see with each district he eyes, a little more weight is added to his shoulders.

Shinji quickly returns things to the business at hand. Several minutes later, her captaina nd Toshiro agree to do reconstruction together.

As Shinji and Rangiku start on a plan, Toshiro stands up rorm the couch. “I’ll go get a pot of tea.”

“Do you need assistance with that?” Momo asked, ready to rise up.

He shakes his head. “No, thank you.”

He leaves while Rangiku and Shinji continue to hash out a plan. His walk would not seem out of the ordinary to most, Momo saw the weight in his shoulders from before, and just as she’d noticed when she first arrived, that he forced himself to stared straight ahead, and not once at her.

___________________________

He regrets every bad thing he’s ever said to her. Every angry exclamation. Every promise or important day he’d forgotten. Every time he scared her for a laugh when they were children. Every tease about her.

He barely manages a landing, his whole body numb with horror. Ice keeps breaking around them. He can hear yelling, but it’s muffled around the ringing in his ears. For the first time in his life, he’s too cold.

She finally stirs, and her hazy, fading eyes stare up at him. He shakes and can barely breathe. He might collapse, but she’s keeping him rigid and frozen in place. She says his nickname, a pierces through him, hitting a part of him that he always associated with first meeting her. The memory of it, the feeling of someone finally looking at him like he wasn’t so different, and letting it warm him into a fleeting sense of security.

“…Why?”

Something in him shatters. 

He should’ve been kinder. Why hadn’t he been? Because he’d been a child who didn’t know better when they first met. Because he’d been alone for so long he didn’t know how to interact with others. Because he’d been scared. Because he’d let her in too far. Because he didn’t know a life without her anymore.

____________________________

An evening breeze blows through the streets of the South Second district, swaying the lanterns of restaurants and brushing Momo’s hair over her shoulders. It reminds her she needs to get it cut, but then she had thought of –

“That was a really good meal.”

Momo looks over to Rangiku , who interlaces her fingers and stretches her arms over her head with a grin.

“It was,” Momo says with her own smile. “I’m glad you recommended that place. We should take the other Women’s Association members there sometime.”

“Yeah, I thought so too. I wanted to try it out with you first.” She winks as she lowers her arms. “It’s been a while since we had a girls night out, huh?”

Momo’s smile widens. After recovering from the battle in the Fake Karakura Town and being discharged from Fourth Division, Rangiku had arranged for the two of them to have lunches and dinners together. They’d be casual mostly, chatting about work for only a short while before moving on to longer discussions about their hobbies, who they’d caught up with lately, and there were a few times they’d left wherever they'd eaten from and gone shopping together. Every now and then, particularly in the beginning, their chatter would turn sombre. They’d reflect on what had happened, whether it was Aizen’s betrayal or Gin’s death, and it took some effort to return the conversation back to something lighter.

Momo remembers the look that would come over Rangiku’s face during those moments. As her friend stares ahead into the growing crowds, she can see hints of that old expression. Her eyes are hooded, her eyes take on a glassiness, and she ignores things – like the loud cheering of an izakaya they pass by, or the sprinting children that almost bump into them before dodging off to the side. What was most telling though was Rangiku didn’t comb her fingers through her hair and complain about the wind ruining her hairstyle.

Like Toshiro, something had been bothering her, but unlike him, she seems to be bouncing back from it quicker. Still, she had moments like this where she grew quiet and solemn. It sends a twinge through Momo’s chest. “Can I ask you something, Rangiku-san?”

Her friend blinks and “Hm?”

Momo’s hesitation catches up to her. She’d wanted to ask before she’d come to dinner, but at seeing Rangiku being her usual boisterous and jolly self, the question had faded into the background.

“I was wonder…”

If she asks her now, she can finally know what happened. Of course, it wouldn’t be Rangiku’s place to say what happened to Toshiro…but what if it was the same thing that affected her?

“…I was wonder if you, uh…”

Momo recalls the two of them leaving Twelfth that day over a month ago, and the chances are whatever it was…

“Do you have any style recommendations for my hair? I was thinking of growing it out rather than getting it cut again.”

Without realising, Rangiku had brought them to a stop in the middle of the street. Souls pass around them, some with skeptical or awed looks, others completely ignoring them. The wind dies down, leaving Rangiku hair slightly frizzy. There’s a gentle smile on her lips, and a knowing look briefly comes across her eyes. Had she known what Momo truly wanted to ask?

But she couldn’t bring herself to, not when it occurred to her that asking Rangiku would potentially expose what has been bothering Toshiro too. She didn’t want to put her friend in an uncomfortable position, but with a tightening of her heart, it dawns on her that asking Toshiro would only do the same for Rangiku.

She’d trapped.

“Yeah, I can think of a few,” Rangiku eventually says. "I'll bring some ideas at the next Women's Association."

Momo blinks.

Rangiku had spoken quietly, uncharacteristic given that hair and fashion were topics she often spoke fervently about. Momo manages to take a deep breath in that looks natural enough, and then a small smile. “I thought you would. Thank you.”

____________________________

Come back.

Toshiro pleads it in silence to the night sky on another sleepless night.

He’d known her for so long, had let her become his closest friend. Her being there as they grew older, as they rose up the ranks of the Shinigami and protected the Seireitei, was an inevitability. How naïve he had been. For all of his posturing and talk of responsibilities and knowledge that any of his subordinates could die on missions, she had somehow become the exception.

Somehow, she would live on forever with him.

How can he have clung to such childish ideals?

Come back, he pleads again. I know now. I want things to be different.

_________________________________

Shafts of the sunrise spill into Momo’s room. She sits up before her alarm clock goes off. Rubbing her eyes and lifting the blanket away, she starts her day.

Nerves thrum through her, and no matter what she tells herself or how many times she goes over the plan for today, they don’t settle.

Today is their first day working together with Tenth Division.

After bathing and changing into her uniform, she steps up the mirror to brush her hair. After a few minutes, she takes up her hair clip and clips it in place.

She stares at her reflection, and after a beat, worries her bottom lip. She sighs and lowers her head with tightly shut eyes. How is she going to get through today?

_____________________________

Momo bound up the stairs towards him. Her recently cut hair tousles around her, and she beams widely. She’s obviously dying to tell him something, even shouts his nickname. Perhaps because they’re not in vicinity of his subordinates or the other Captains and Lieutenants, or perhaps because her joy is so often infectious, he chooses not to shout the usual correction at her.

In fact, Toshiro can't help but smile. He’s been doing that more lately.

He decided to be more open, with her first, and eventually with others.

When she stops in front of him and began to gush over a new project she was working on with her division, he has trouble covering up the reaction he has to the relieved, cathartic ache in his heart. Her forgiveness is still raw, even after all these months. Thankfully, she’s so caught up in her excitement she doesn’t see him briefly glance away to regain his composure.

The future was brighter, but the fact there was even a future with her after everything is a blessing all of it’s own.

_____________________________

From a distance, Toshiro orders his and a few of Fifth Division’s officers to do various tasks, and after they disperse, he goes to the next group.

Momo looks back to the map of North District Nineteen and continues outlining the area she and her subordinates will work on. In her periphery, Shinji finishes speaking with Takaya and Katsuro, and makes his way over to Toshiro before he can reach the group.

She tries to ignore the exchange, but her ears unwittingly tune in, catching bits and pieces of their conversation over the shouts of subordinates, sandals crunching in the dirt, and equipment being unloaded from carts. From what she’d (unintentionally) been able to tell, they discuss their findings so far.

She keeps a wince from reaching her face and she recalls their brief meeting this morning. She only gave Toshiro a glance, keeping her eyes either on Rangiku or somewhere behind the two of them. Toshiro retained a stoic exterior, even made a few pointed comments towards Shinji like he did when her captain annoyed him, but that heaviness in his shoulders and eyes is still there. She wishes she could just wave it away, like the wind pushing the clouds across the sky overhead.

It had been over a month since the war ended. He hasn’t said anything to her, and she can’t tell of it’s because of the work they’ve had to do or because he doesn’t want to. Was he concerned for Rangiku? Was it something he didn’t think she’d understand? Would it hurt her?

She shakes her head. She repeatedly tries to tell herself it’s none of her business, but her concern and burgeoning frustration doesn’t waver. Both grow when she can sense, for only several seconds, his gaze on the side of her face.

_____________________________

He doesn’t recall anything of his time as a ‘zombie’ to the Quincy, nor does he want to.

The last thing he remembered was collapsing, his ice shattering around him. Time slowed, as in that moment he thought about how this could be the end. It certainly felt like it was. He was so weak, so very tired and hurting, but he was still awake when the shadow fell over him.

However, the old cliché he’d been told about didn’t happen. He didn’t think on or remember his past. He didn’t despair that he was dying.

He'd thought about Rangiku, dying below, with no one to help her.

He'd thought about his subordinates, who would be without a captain again.

As a darkness began to settle around the edges of his blurred vision, he thought about Momo. He’d sensed her before, she’d been far away from where he was. She reiatsu had been strong, she was all right.

He didn’t need to protect her. Yet he still wanted to see her. For the last few seconds before the darkness took over and muffled footsteps and a sickly sweet voice reach his ears, he thought about the fact he won’t be there in her future.

His next memory is of being put in the recovery tanks along with Rangiku. At the time he’d been exhausted from the procedure Mayuri had made him endure – he vaguely recalls Mayuri half sarcastically marveling, “I’m quite surprised you’re conscious right now.”

He was lifted and secured into the tank by Nemu. Mayuri had watched him, and didn’t approach until Nemu stepped aside. He’d spoken at him, but Toshiro wavered between consciousness and falling into a warmer darkness and only caught sections of his sentences.

“The tank will complete the de-zombification…Consider yourself…Lieutenant is…My procedure took…years off your lifespan, but…we’ll take you to the Palace, no doubt you will…”

And the tank lid had lowered as Toshiro bowed his head. As he drifted into unconsciousness, his mind clung to one part of what Mayuri had said.

My procedure took…years off your lifespan…

He vaguely remembered thinking he must have misheard.

He hadn't focused on it when he awoke again and left the tank, choosing instead to thank Mayuri and rush off into the fray with Rangiku. She surely heard too, but he'd kept quiet about it. He’d been truly grateful and yet, that piece of information, it lingered quietly in the back of his mind.

He’d focused on the fight against the Giant Quincy, and had to resort to using Hyourinmaru’s Completed Form. He thought only of battle strategies and ways to keep his enemy distracted from either destroying the Soul Society below or from causing further harm to those still in the area. 

It's now hours after the Quincy had evaporated away, and he and Byakuya found Momo and Shinji, safe.

She's been clearly startled by his appearance. He didn't know what to expect, had never really thought about her reaction to seeing him like this, but he dislikes her being so confused and unsure. Certain there's no immediate danger in their vicinity and with Byakuya scouting the area, takes her aside to explain the Completed Form.

Shock turns recognition, and then finally to relief. He can't help but feel she same moments later when he's transformed back and she heals his injuries. It's only a few minutes later when Mayuri’s words fully hit him. From then on, he can barely look her in the eye.

_____________________________

The setting sun halos Toshiro's hair, and his shadow casts long over the rubble. He stands alone, arm folded and back facing those a short distance away, clearly lost in thought.

In different circumstances, it would’ve posed as quite the striking image for Momo; one she would be tempted to capture in either her drawings or as a photo on her denreishiki.

His subordinates walk around her, gathering up the materials and equipment they’d used. She didn’t have to interact with him at all today, and even if she did, she’s not sure how she would go about it.

Somewhere behind her, Shinji calls out for officers to help with lifting some of the ruins into carts to be cleared off. She turns to go and assist, but its hard to take her eyes off her friend. The turmoil from earlier arises. She can’t ask him what's wrong, and he won’t even look at her unless she doesn't notice. Still, she can’t leave him as is.

With a deep breath in, and then out, she walks to him.

Her steps crunch from the smaller pieces of rubble and dirt, and alert him to her approach. He half twists around to her, and it causes her to stop more than an arms length away.

“I was wondering…” She hadn’t thought about what to say. But with a light snort, she manages. “Sorry, I was wondering if you had any further plans for Higuchi-san or Takagaki-san. We need some help with clearing the wreckage into the carts.”

Toshiro blinks, as if coming out of deep thought. With a small shake of his head, he turns back to the sunset. “No, I have nothing for them. Their performance was good, if you need to know.”

“Oh, thank you. I’ll be sure to tell my Captain. They’re both hard workers, so that isn’t too surprising to hear.”

“I sent them with Narita to set up the rations for distribution. They should be finished by now.”

Momo swallows against the growing tightness in her throat. She gives a nod, not trusting her words, and only lingers for a few seconds more before turning to go. She wants to kick herself for not coming up with something better, something that would make her stay with him a bit longer and force him to talk with her.

She’s taken ten steps when Toshiro calls to her.

“Wait, Hinamori.”

She looks over her shoulder, squinting against the setting sun. She can’t make out his expression, but his arms now rest at his sides, and his shoulders are higher, straighter. There’s a resoluteness there, but somehow also a reluctance.

He approaches her, but stops after a few steps. He speaks lowly, and it’s hard to make out what he says. She has no choice but to come closer.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear what you said, Captain.”

The corners of his mouth fall and tighten into a scowl – not directed at her, she’s certain.

“When we’re done here, I want to discuss something with you,” he repeats. “I assume you don’t have time for today so I –”

“I do!” Momo would normally balk at her boldness – especially for interrupting someone, let alone a Captain. But it was if she’d been holding her breath on the brink of passing out, and now she was desperate to get air. “I-I’ll have time after we’re done here. We can talk.”

Toshiro had been surprised, but shifts his expression back to neutral. “It won’t take long. Let’s load those carts first and get back to Tenth Division.”

He walks past her, and for a moment, it's as if the heaviness within him lingers over her. Whatever this would be, she's both eager and dreading to know.

____________________________

“How long do Souls live for?”

Toshiro rolls his eyes. Ever since she got here, Momo had been full of questions. She’s more curious than the average Soul, wanting to know every little detail about her new world she called home. Just a few minutes ago she’d asked a range of questions about what rules she needs to follow she didn’t end up in trouble – as he answered her, it reminded him of telling Jidanbo the Rules of City for the first time.

Before he answers her current question, he kicks a small hill of snow just in front of them, sending a white spray into the care tree they stood under. “It depends. Some live for a few decades, others live for thousands of years.”

Over the many layers she wore up to her the bottom half of her face, Momo’s eyes widened in wonder. “Really? That’s such a long time.”

“Not to them,” he says. “Time here is different to the World of Living, or so I’ve heard.”

“Thousands of years…you can do so much in that time!”

She starts listing off various activities and adventures one could do for over a thousand years, all the while her eyes shone, and when a scarf loosened from around her face, it revealed her wide grin.

He doesn’t understand her glee. Was this something specific to Souls that came from the World of the Living? Humans lived far shorter lives than Souls; perhaps the idea of being able to live that long appealed to them. He’d been born in the Junrinan, he knew only this world, and from what Granny had told him, ten years here likely felt like a year in the World of the Living.

He let’s her go on and on with her list, but when she comes to an end, breathless, she says, “Do Souls know how long they’ll live for?”

He lets out a bewildered snort. “Of course not!”

“Oh…” That dampens her enthusiasm, as if he’d popped a bubble. Before he can feel any guilt, she turns her attention back to the silhouette of the Seireitei in the distance. “So, I guess this means the Shinigami in there have been alive for a long time then.”

He shrugs. “Sure, I guess.”

It’s several heart beats later when her grin returns, but there’s a softness to it. “I hope we get to live for over a thousand years.”

He’s taken aback. We? Why 'we'? Why not ‘I’?

He wants to ask, but fears he’ll embarrass himself. So instead, he ponders on it in silence as she continues to admire the Seireitei’s silhouette. Did she mean it as a friend? That she saw them being in the future together?

Granny had been the only person who saw a future with him, planning their days with what items he’d have to go out and buy and what shrines or places they needed to visit together in the coming month.

Something about another seeing him in their future made bite the inside of his lip against the painful pang in his chest. Somehow, though, it also made him happy.

“What if we did?”

He hadn’t realised he’d asked the question aloud until Momo swivels her head back to him. “Hm?”

He shakes his head. “Nothing.”

“You mean if we live for over a thousand years?” He cringes inwardly as she considers. Her grin widens after a beat. “We’d have a lot to do, I’m sure of it!”

____________________________

Momo stares mutely at Toshiro, and then at some point, through him, and then into nothing. He shifts his gaze to the side, staring hard at the corner of the training room.

Just behind them, Fifth and Tenth Division officers shared a meal together in one of Tenth Division’s courtyards around a fire, chattering and laughing amongst themselves. Even in her shock, Momo ended up hearing her captain laugh loudly at one of his own jokes, but she can’t bring herself to smile or cringe.

She and Toshiro sit by the training room's entrance, mostly in the shadows. A strip of moonlight comes between them through the doorway, falling over his left foot and her folded knees. He sits half against the wall, his left knee bent and his arms resting in his lap. It would appear to some as the most relaxed he’s ever looked, but this is one of the few times she’s seen him look resigned.

He’d just recounted to her how a Quincy had taken control over him with her blood, and then how Mayuri had restored him. It had all made sense up until that point, but not what he’d just said. No, it was more like she didn’t want the sentence to be true, refused to let it be a part of what he'd already said.

She brings her gaze back to him as a small tremor runs through her hands. “I don’t understand,” she struggles to say. “What do you mean? How can you live for only three hundred more years?”

She thinks he won’t answer her, too overcome by whatever emotions rush through him. However, he takes a sharp breath in, but continues to stare off to the side. “Kurotsuchi says that’s at most, but it’s at least one hundred and fifty years. The procedure he used on me was crude by his standards, something he cobbled together while we were battling the Quincy. As a result of that and what the Quincy did to me, my lifespan has been reduced.”

“You’ve acting differently lately --” her voice catches, and her vision becomes misty “-- now I understand why.”

A quiet, strangled sound comes from Toshiro. “Matsumoto thought it was best to tell you.”

And it’s all the confirmation she needs that Rangiku is facing the same tragedy. She must have seen Momo’s dilemma that night they ate out, and decided to make things easier by encouraging Toshiro to tell her. She could cry for that alone, but she won’t; she’ll speak with her later.

She bows over, fisted hands bunching her uniform at the knees. “I-I don’t know what to say,” she laments. “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.”

That strikes something within him. He shifts, his back fully pressing against the wall and moving his foot out of the moonlight. Her eyes had adjusted to the darkness, and she can make out the furrow in his brow twitching and the corner of his mouth dropping into a grimace.

His gaze goes to the ceiling. “I didn’t want to say anything,” he admits. “There’s nothing I can do.”

The catch in his voice is enough to make her move over to him, coming to sit next to him, their shoulders grazing and her knee bumping up against his. She rarely sits so close to him, feeling they should maintain a small distance between them, but this felt right. And judging from his lack of comment or shrugging away, he thinks the same.

“I’m sorry for what I said at the Palace.”

He blinks and finally looks at her. “What?”

She can’t help but be a little relieved he’d forgotten her comment, but winced at having to bring it up now. “I said Hyourinmaru’s Completed Form was a glimpse into the future. How careless of me.”

He shakes his head, but still doesn’t seem to remember. “It’s fine, you weren’t to know.”

“Even so, I should have been more considerate. That form is part of your zanpakuto, not something to be joked about.”

“You were shocked by it, and we’d come out of a battle and Yhwach was defeated, it’s understandable.”

She considers, and then admits, “And we were really tired, I guess.”

That gets a huff of a humoured snort out of him, but it doesn’t reach his eyes or shape his into a faint smile.

The urge to hold his hand comes over her again. Unlike that meeting from a few weeks ago, she doesn’t resist it this time. She takes the one closest to her. It’s the one that been regrown with hojiku-zai, the original lost on the battlefield at the Fake Karkura Town. She doesn’t hold his conventionally, choosing instead to lay her hand on the underside, and her fingers loosely come between his.

She watches him tilts his head down, staring at their hands. Something soft flits over his face, something akin to being pleasantly surprised.

For not the first time, she thinks on how she never imagined all those decades ago he would lose and replace a hand. Just as she’d never imagined what they went through because of Aizen, or the battles they fought against Hollows and Quincy, or the people they’ve lost under their watch. They’d been through so much, perhaps too much for Souls their ages.

Despite the time and effort it will take to rebuild the Soul Society, she had been thinking that peace was finally going to be restored. She was going to be happy again, with her friends and subordinates. She was going to ask Toshiro out to lunches more often, and finally sit with whatever her feelings for him were. The ones she’s can’t put a name too, but feels she’s just on cusp of doing.

Had he thought about these sort of things too? About what he had been through and the future he may not have anymore? If that was the case, it’s no wonder he didn’t want to bring it up. It’s enough for one of her tears to roll out the side of her eye.

She’s quick to wipe it with her free hand, but it doesn’t go unnoticed by Toshiro.

“I’m sorry,” he rasps.

She shakes her head. “Why are you apologising? You didn’t ask for any of this.”

“No, it’s not that. I didn't want to...”

He hesitates, and when he doesn’t continue, Momo finishes it for him. "Hurt me?"

He blinks, surprised she had guessed the rest. It still astounds her that he can't see the good within himself, but always in others.

"You don't need to apologise. When I saw something was bothering you, I wanted to know."

She senses there's more, a second apology he wants to make. When he doesn't, she stares straight ahead.

“We Shinigami are taught and prepared to die in battle for Humans and our friends,” she continues. “If we’re lucky, we can reach an old age with our accomplishments. Thinking about how long we'll live for is not something we're supposed to contemplate, our focus is on our duties and responsibilities. Even so, we’re not meant to die like this. You’re not meant to --”

He snorts again, and the faintest, saddest smile shapes his lips. “You’re not Reio, Hinamori,” he says, and she can imagine in another setting it would be a tease. “And even if you were, you doubt you would have the power to change this. I have accepted it's a likely possibility, and I will plan ahead accordingly. I never thought about how long I would live for --" his shoulders deflate with a shaky breath "-- and I shouldn't."

"Nothing is set in stone," she says, fiercely.

She’s always considered herself an optimist, perhaps to a fault. She remembers being more hopeful for the future when she was younger. Maybe that’s what came with growing up, you lose a little bit of hope every year, and cling to what still remains – foolishly, she suspects some think, but not her.

With a thick swallow, she lists her head up to the ceiling. “You said before that Captain Kurotsuchi was working on a way to restore your lifespan, right?”

“Yes.”

She mirrors the faint smile he'd had moments ago, but in her misty eyes there’s something less fragile. She tightens her grip on his hand. “Then let’s hope he does.”

It doesn’t dissolve his grief and cynicism -- she knows he hates leaving something he feels responsible for in the hands of others, and she can’t imagine what it must feel like to put your life in the hands of Twelfth Division’s captain. She has not words she can offer to console him or give him a new perspective of this. She has her own emotions to deal with too, ones of helplessness and a flickering hope, small but bright.

Her heart throbs when he flips his hand around and interlaces his fingers between hers in a tight grip. It's all they can do for now as a cloud passes over the moon and the laughter continues outside.

#hitsuhina #toshiro hitsugaya #momo hinamori #rangiku matsumoto #shinji hirako #bleach #fanfiction #angst #spoiler for the ending: I didn't intend it to be so bittersweet at the end (with an slight emphasis on the bitter) #but after a while it felt like the right note to end on #I may write up a small follow up that's most fluffy and shows Toshiro's determination to make the most of his life #whether that's in the short time he has or the thousand+ years he may get back once Mayuri comes up with something #because I am 100% certain he has tome to terms with it once the ten year timeskip has gone by #he doesn't like it of course but he has accepted it #and also write a follow up to explain what that 'second apology' was...👀 #unless you were able to guess it in which case woo!

[mugram]

Sway the Court - Scene Transcript

* The small video in this Scene Transcript includes a quick flash/glitch at the end of it to flash to the MUGRAM logo. The video is not important to your experience of this Scene Transcript. Please enjoy.

I'll sway the court  Make their decisions Choose their hand

“Listen to me, okay? I will make sure you get out so you can see your family again.” Mayumi mutters to her client.

“Thank you.” Her client smiles. “I need to get back to my job so I can get money for my family.”

“Of course.” Mayumi nods. “I’ll make sure that you don’t spend any time in jail.”

Doors fly open 

And it’s the fight for our lives

“...She should not be jailed for the crimes someone else has clearly done. Thank you.” Mayumi takes a seat and looks over at the person sitting next to her.

“You think you can convince them to let me go?”

“Well, I’m sure I can sway the court into your favor.” Mayumi gives a small smile. “I promise you that you will see your family again. If not immediately, then after a little bit of community service.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” Her client profusely thanks Mayumi.

“Hey, don’t worry.” Mayumi places a hand on her client’s shoulder. “Lawyers are meant to help out their clients.”

I don’t care how wrong this could go for me

You all will be free so just let me be

“I have to ask.” Mayumi stands. “Witness, did you see my client actually go over to the store, rob it, and leave minutes after?"

"Well, I didn't see her rob it, but the alarm–" The witness starts.

"You didn't see her do it." Mayumi points out.

"Yes, but–" The witness rubs their neck.

"You were across the street from the store; how would you know it was her?" Mayumi stares at the witness, who now is uncomfortably shifting before they finally breathe. "If you don't have any answer, then I guess my line of questioning is over."

Mayumi begins to walk back to her seat.

"She was the only person who left when the alarm went off."  The witness finally speaks.

Mayumi grimaces.

I'll sway the court 

Make their decisions

Choose their hand

Her client only stares back.

So, don't even worry

I have the command and the proof in my hand

I'll make sure that these things will only sway in my favor

"Okay, I need you to tell me. Be honest." Mayumi exhales. "Did you steal from the store?"

"What?" The client shakes her head vigorously. "No, no! I wouldn't do that. I went there to grab some snacks and medication for my sister. I wouldn't rob the store! I have a job and I'm the only source of income for them and I can't leave them because then–"

"Hey, okay. Take a deep breath with me, okay?" Mayumi inhales and exhales.

Her client breathes slowly.

"I promise you, I'll get you out of here, alright?"

"Alright. Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. I have to do this.” Mayumi exhales.

It’s justice after all.

"Your Honor, this is an outrage.” Mayumi stands up. “Surely you can find some leeway–"

“It’s clear to me that after all this back and forth what my stance will be.” The judge bangs a gavel and Mayumi swallows with a frown.

Don’t condemn anything I say

Because I swear I’ll make them pay

“...is GUILTY of the charge of theft.” The judge announces.

“Damn it.” Mayumi mumbles as she stares at the judge before falling back to her seat.

“Hey. What… What does this mean?”

She turns over to her client.

And, don’t you dare turn your back on me yet

Because you shouldn’t need to repent

For sins aren’t yours 

“I… I don’t know.” Mayumi swallows. “I’m sorry.”

They’re all mine.

Mayumi stands in the hallway and watches as her client walks past her. Her hands are cuffed and she has a terrified look on her face.

Mayumi looks down. 

I'll sway the court 

Make their decisions

Choose their hand

Mayumi watches the car drive away, her client inside. “I’m sorry.”

So, don't even worry

“Hey, Kubo-san.” One of her coworkers rolls over in his chair. “I heard about your last case.”

“It’s… fine. Don’t worry.” Mayumi waves him off.

“Hey, it’s not fine. You poured your heart into that case.” 

“I know! It’s just…”

“It happens sometimes. I understand. We can’t save everyone.”

“But, she was clearly innocent!”

I have the command and the proof in my hand

Her coworker sighs. “I know.”

Mayumi exhales and her coworker places a hand on her shoulder.

“It’s just how things happen around here, Kubo-san. I’m sorry.”

I'll make sure that these things will only sway in my favor

"I heard she got her sentence and was brought to prison earlier today."

"...I don't really think that's something you should say to try and comfort someone." Mayumi rubs her face. 

"...Ah, my bad." He rubs the back of his head. "Well, you could always visit in the future."

"Yeah, sure."

It’s justice after all.

The key clicks and Mayumi pushes her apartment door open. Wrapping her brown coat around her arm, she walks over to the couch. 

Picking up a remote and tapping the on button at the TV, a red flash instantly catches Mayumi's attention.

…found dead in her cell last night.

Vote Here

#mugram #ocgram #milgram oc #Prisoner One - Mayumi Kubo #MUGRAM -- Scene Extraction Transcripts #// the mvs are going to become more... music video-esque but this was the first one I wrote so

[dedahblog]

Ichigo and Rukia in Memories in The Rain are two frustrating idiots

You just can't take them seriously.

For the first time, since his mother's death, Ichigo forgot about the upcoming anniversarry of his ultimate trauma.

You can pretty much guess by that simple fact how meeting Rukia brought joy to his life and "changed his world"

When she asked him why he became sad, he answered "nothing " and he could had stopped there. However, this is drama queen Ichigo we're talking about.

He had to add loudly "I see ... it's soon " keeping the suspense for Rukia (and us). He made her aware that something was indeed wrong.

Basically, "I'm acting as If I'm shutting myself off from you but not really I want you to know that something is really bothering me"

....

let's move on

Then later, Ichigo could have stopped at just informing Rukia what it was the anniversary of his mother's death but he had to add that she was killed dramatically under the moonlight.

Ichigo basically gave Rukia the greenlight to talk about his personal life. But when she pushed her luck and wanted to know more, he denied everything.

...

Local tsundere teen sending mixed signals to 200 year old emotionally constipated clueless as hell ghost.

Wonder what will happen

She was so worried that she eavesdropped on Tatsuki and Orihim's little chat at class. A behaviour that was totally unusual coming from her.

She couldn't hold back her worry when Ichigo told her he was taking his shinigami job off. She even revealed she had been stalking watching him all day long.

However, when Ichigo asked her, why she followed him to the cemetery, she said she was only there for her shinigami duties ...

Of course it is, why would anyone think of any other reason ...

Then Rukia came out as insensitive telling him maybe a hollow killed her.

Ichigo was pissed off mostly (I think) out of frustration that people were finding excuses instead of blaming him.

Their conversations ended shortly on a tense conclusion : Ichigo saw the girl he wanted to save the day the mother died, fell on his knees baring his heart to Rukia admitting his sin

When you think about it, there is no reason for Ichigo not to avoid talking to Rukia after so much tension, yet...

He slightly smiled greeting her and genuinely asked her if she wanted to continue where they left off

This proves something extremely important which is how lonely Ichigo was and how much he was yearning for someone to support him mentally

and he chose that person to be Rukia....

....

...

The person he met one month ago !!!

over any one of his friends, classmates family members. ??

(what's wrong with him ?!!)

And his prediction were correct

Rukia who knows about loneliness more than anyone. She tried to try to help Ichigo the best she could.

However, she could only offer him what she herself yearned for the most : not be alone

They both longed for someone they can trust and who won't give up on them.

Ichigo didn't feel surprised by her thoughtful words. It was like he was expecting her to say what he needed the most despite her previous bluntness

When Rukia promised she will be there for him as long as it takes, all Ichigo said was "yeah"...

Kubo being Kubo knows what he's doing, knows how those loser are being soft for each other and will die before admitting it

He basically self inserted himself/ the readers in Kon's place " stop acting so cool. I can't keep up with you guys!"

Remember when kubo was enjoying himself creating this manga and slandering Rukia and Ichigo ? Good times good times

I guess panels speak for themselves.

Rukia was begging Ichigo to stay alive, screaming at him to stop fighting, being so happy he survived and used all what remained of her power to heal him.

Yet when he thanked her for healing him, she acted as if it was nothing...

Last round,

it turns out Ichigo is the honest one between the two

Ichigo told Rukia he had to go and eventually had an emotional conversation with his father where he confessed his frustrations

Yet he isn't even bothered that Rukia was listening (without his consent )to his private talk.

That's because he wants her to be there

When Rukia offered to be there for him, he really embraced that offer. He wants her to know about every messed up part of him because he knows she would never give up on him.

...

..

Also I guess he doesn't mind Rukia being a shameless stalker

( that was the second time you're stalking him the same day Rukia wth !! At least be more subtle or feel a bit ashamed)

#Stalker Rukia should be a tag. I love her when she's shameless #Ichiruki

[nessieartss]

How did you learn how to draw? Was it something you've always done? I feel like I wanna learn but having really 0 experience is just so unmotivating

Hi! I learnt to draw when i was in highschool, like 13-14 years ago? i might have been drawing long before that but i completely forgot. for me personally, i copied other artist's works that i genuinely enjoy/like (i did by copying kubo's art style from bleach because i love his art style so much).

it doesn't have to be good. i know it was frustrating for me as well because i wanted it to be good, but we all start from 0 so please go easy on yourself.

if you have a favorite character from anime/manga/tv shows or just random people from pinterest, it would help a lot because you can learn to draw with that character in mind. i get bored easily if i only draw bald faceless character lmao.

from there you can slowly learn how anatomy works, face structure, start to play with colors (just base color is fine, you don't need to jump immediately to shadow/light because it's hard, i'm still learning to this day). i know it's a lot, you can take it easy 1 day at a time.

also, you don't have to treat drawing as a practice every time, because i feel like your brain would get exhausted real fast. just random doodle is fine, and remember to take a rest!

okay, i'm sorry i'm rambling a lot lmao. here are some of my old drawing that i could find, and my very first digital drawing in 2013. remember that we all start from 0 so i hope this motivates you 💜 thank you for this ask anon

#ask #anon #answer

[sneezemonster15]

https://www.tumblr.com/sunshinecherryblossom/732710854315933696/wtf-it-is-true-oh-my-god-when-is-this

This seems false, what do you think about it?

I find it highly unlikely. Unless someone gives me a legit link to it, I wouldn't consider it. Lots of fake interviews of Kishi are doing rounds in this fandom. And Kishi would never say something like this given how he has treated Sakura's character for 700 chapters and beyond. This part is from his 2010 interview (at Jump Fiesta Tokyo-Japan) :

When the interviewer asked Kishi about Sakura, and called her a detestable girl (most people can see how Sakura's character is written as a detestable character, can't speak for delusional people), Kishi replied in a very convenient manner - "Realistic girls are like that..."

Lol. Once he calls his character realistic, what can one say? Realistic characters are never black and white, they stand in the grey area. So you can get away by saying - "Oh, she is realistic", without expanding on it.

Shounen characters are generally larger than life type characters to create a large impact since they serve a pedagogic purpose for its target group. People who are from the good guys camp, are generally taken as good, people who are from the bad guys camp are generally perceived as bad. So of course it would confuse people when Sakura is from the good guys camp but acts like a total douchebag. And naturally they would ask questions about it. But Kishi totally avoided to take the more controversial position by saying - she is realistic.

We know Sakura's character can be realistic, many women are the way she is. But is she a good role model for women of any place at any time? No. She doesn't really serve the pedagogic purpose other characters do. She is a negative person, selfish and immature. We know that. But Kishi cannot say it explicitly in his interviews because it would lead to all the other kinds of controversial questions, and would potentially open a can of worms for him. First question would be - If she is from the good guys camp and remains till the end, why did you write her as negative, even after she got so popular? You could have used her character's popularity with the girls to say something inspiring, something kind. So why didn't you? Any other writer would have jumped at the chance. Writers are supposed to work off the popularity of characters in a medium such as commercial serialilized manga.

Kishi kept writing her as detestable. If he could, he would have told them - I wrote her that way because I needed plot device for Naruto and Sasuke's romance which I was writing in the disguise of ninja manga. Team seven is about S and N. It's a love story about them and Sakura doesn't figure anywhere in their relationship and I want to make it clear by showing why.

And I have a feeling quite a lot of Sakura's characterisation comes from his personal experience of women. Of course he couldn't say all that. But he can be indirect about it. Although when you are indirect about something so many times, with context it becomes quite direct. Hehehe

Just look how Gege responded when he was asked a difficult question from Kubo. Female characters are not given much weight in shounen given its target audience. Most female characters in shounen aren't even given half the character development male characters get. And look at Japanese society, it's so patriarchal, who's surprised their representation of female characters is so backward? I doubt most of these mangakas get out very much, to actually put some effort in knowing how women act and why.

Look at Kubo's interview with Gege. Gege's female characters are kickass, as strong as men, as smart and well developed. They have agency, self worth and esteem. Their characters don't revolve around male characters. But female characters like these are beyond Kubo's imagination lol. Look at the female characters in Bleach hahaha. So this is what he asked Gege.

Kubo finds Jjk women formidable because he cannot even fathom independent women, women who don't depend on men for everything. Lol. They can walk shoulder to shoulder with men, they aren't less than men, like they are in most shounen. But of course, Gege cannot tell Kubo these things. Hehe. Kubo is his senior, and the Japanese have a whole set of etiquette on how to behave with one's senpai. Gege won't say anything even remotely offensive to Kubo, so the best way to deal with such things is to be vague and use self deprecating humor, so as to not appear confrontational, it's a communication tactic. I also use these kinds of tactics when talking to difficult people or people in high positions I don't agree with. I have interviewed hundreds of people in my work. So I understand that one needs to be subtle even in their disagreements.

In Shippuden, later on, Sakura was written with heroine like qualities. So what this means is that Kishi doesn't have a very good opinion on either women or women in shounen. She does get some footage in the manga, where other characters praise her skills, like one would expect a heroine to get. She confesses to Sasuke and Naruto both. Never mind the rejection from both. But it's clear that Kishi would never have made Naruto end up with Sakura who treated Naruto this badly. Kishi is not a fool. He plainly says that she comes off as detestable because that's how she was written. Lol.

Lots of rumours have been doing rounds about Naruto's remake or live action film etc. but as far as I know, nothing such has actually materialised. So I wouldn't worry about it either.

I think it's high time that SS, NH and NrSk accept the reality and move on. It's been years. Sasuke is gay. Naruto is gay. Was established as closeted gay in both parts one and two. He would not suddenly defy his character traits and become straight just because NrSk can't keep it in their pants. So pathetic tch. Guys, there is nothing for you in Naruto except heartbreak. Grow up and move on.

SNS at least have legit reason to still be hopeful. The het shippers have nada. Zilch. Zero. Hehe. But well, who can fight desperation? Not these peeps.

#ask #sakura #naruto #gege #kishimoto #kubo #haruno sakura

[el-yon]

[ personal sharing time ]

beyond all the character/narrative reasons for Ichigo to live a full life, I have a very personal/political/professional (cannot dissociate the three) appreciation for the fact that he does not join the Gotei - nor any organization, for that matter.

I know Kubo draws mainly from Buddhism, and I don’t think he’s worried about political organizations at all, since his message is about self-realization. However, as he takes us through Ichigo’s journey, he does take us through different political arrangements, meaning, organizations of violence: oligarchic and militaristic regimes, colonialism/imperialism, theocratic and totalitarian ideologies, you name it. For instance, I think Kubo said somewhere he chose the spanish/latin motif to Hueco Mundo and the Arrankar/Hollowfication stuff because he thought it sounded sensuous, which makes sense with the uh... subtext of it all, BUT, the predatory viciousness of Hueco Mundo is such a strong colonization subtext too!. Also, expropriating a population/territory (Karakura) to literally fabricate and access sovereignty (the Royal Key)... wow. Then you know, don’t even need to get into Ginjo literally stealing powers, or everything about the Wandenreich.

But the most important “organization of violence” here is not the one that imposes one’s will onto another, but the individual one that informs human agency and autonomy. Ichigo happens to have all the available types of power in his hands, he has a lot of means to inflict violence, but he gets to learn how to use them to be his own person.

No gods, no hierarchies, no masters but himself.

When we’re kids, we’re vulnerable. Things happen to us, and we are powerless. Then, as we grow up, we gain physicial strenght, we get the chance to walk on our own, to actually do things, to be active - we get access to power, including, to do things to others. When we start Bleach, Ichigo gets this immediate power boost in his life and we see him fighting the world: he chops off Sora’s hand, he chops off the serial killer hollow and he is angry, he’s brutal, he’s violent - as we see even more clearly in the whole hollowfication journey. A journey that, beautifully, comes to its closure when he finally learns the truth about himself, stops trying to supress it, and learns how to use it, how to regulate it, and once he relies on Orihime. Which brings me to the next part.

Growing up right beside him, we have the development of three other young people, each one relating to particular aspect of his own powers, dealing with violence too: Chad is a window to racial violence and learns how to fight back on his terms, Orihime is a window to gender violence and learns how to fight back on her terms, Uryu is a window to genocide and learns how to fight back on his terms. And they are also helping and being helped by Renji and Rukia, two people who have been hurt by class opression and nobility dynamics, who also found their own way to make it work - the “we gripped each other’s hand instead of the blade” is very important to lil old me.

In a world that is terrible, but also full of possibilities, Ichigo and Karakura are (to me, this is a personal take) an amazing ode to human agency that is informed by self-improvement, desire to help, to care and protect more than any disciplinary power out there, and I love that for them.

#bleach appreciation #ichigo kurosaki #six hearts beat as one #karakura gang #this is also my way of saying why i firmly believe karakura gang are a married poly #when they die then we'll see what happens (rukongai revolution or hell uprising? I'll be there for it)

[bleachbleachbleach]

Hello, it's me again! I'm the one who sent you question about 'which captain are married'. Your answer was really genius, I read it thoroughly though it's just your headcanon 😂 Just adding some information, believe it or not in this damn Bleach Jet interview there's also one question frankly asking 'Do you have any details about Shinigami's income? Like their monthly salary, allowances, etc'. (Which I thought this as a very hilarious question because 'WHY SO RANDOM??' 😂). Then you know, Kubo gave a very detail information, including the nominals of the salary and how each captain had their own mansion as an allowance. Just like a normal company. I'm pretty sure they also manage anything regarding bereave or insurance lol. I'm just curious which Squad is responsible for accounting and finance. Or they probably have their own financial divisions outside of Gotei 13? Well never thought about it before 😂

THE SALARY THING IS ONE OF OUR FAVORITE PARATEXTS LOL. Who would want that information, you ask? The target audience is VERY much us. I legit think it's one of the first things I looked up when we were first returning to Bleach. Bleach fills the workplace drama space on my dance card; of course I wanna know what the payscale is!

Each division is probably responsible for tracking its own finances and submitting them to Central 46 as the Soul Society equivalent of the IRS (Internal Revenue Service, for non-USians). Yumichika, for example, definitely does the books for 11th. No one else in that division has even ever seen such a book. 

What I wanna know is how the budget proposal process works. Prior to the start of each fiscal term, does each Division submit their past and proposed budgets? Do they go straight to the 46 for closed-door deliberations/rulings, or does a version also need to be reviewed and passed at a captain's meeting before heading up to 46? I ask this because I think it would be absolutely torturous for them to sit through such a meeting, which naturally means I want them to have to.

I don't know what the citation is for this, but the Bleach Wiki mentions that captain's meeting decisions are made unanimously. I feel like that can't possibly be true, unless a unilateral "well, Yamamoto said so" counts as "unanimous" (though the AU where the Gotei is committed to an anarchist governance style is also appealing to me, LOL). But imagine a captain's meeting where they had 13 budgets to review and pass: There's a Q&A period. Each captain has a time-limited amount of time to suggest friendly or unfriendly amendments and/or to plead their case about whether the budget should pass or fail. You can yield time to other captains, or move to extend time (though this then also has to be voted on by all the captains in attendance). Speaking from personal experience, this process can take literal days. Just imagine. IT'S HORRIBLE I LOVE IT. 

Other things I wonder (under the cut):

-- What factors determine what the Gotei's overall operating budget is? Are they fully funded by the noble houses? Do they accrue wealth by any other means? How does the Soul Society macroeconomy even work. 

– What’s the deal with this mansion that each captain gets? Where are these mansions located? Is it like the White House, and there’s a bunch of historical rooms with names like The Sakura Sitting Room? Is there a hallway with portraits of all the past captains that you have to walk past every morning on your way out the door? Even better, what if they don’t each get a whole mansion, but only a wing of a mansion? Then they all have to live together, Big Brother style. Central 46 is always watching.

-- Does the Gotei have an endowment? Have they invested in the Tokyo Stock Exchange? What about the Rukongai Rice Futures Market?

-- Are there ever special funds/one-time line items that need to be voted on? Was post-TYBW reconstruction back-burnered until the next fiscal year because they Had to Do the Budget First because their extant emergency response funds got exhausted after the FIRST invasion?

-- Are the Divisions automatically funded equally, or if they write a really good budget proposal can they be awarded more money? Is the only way to get more money to officially declare and register a specialty with the Central 46 Office of Division Specialties, like the 9th and Seireitei Communications, and the 12th's lab budgets? Outside of the regular budget allocation periods, are there earmarked funds/grants to which divisions can apply separately? Are you only allowed to take state money, or can you apply for grant-type arrangements with noble houses or non-Gotei entities? What about gift funds? 

-- Why are damages from the captain's personal salary and not the division budget? Did someone just tell Komamura and Hitsugaya this, but it's not actually true and they're the only ones who think this? Or does this suggest that the budgeting within the Gotei actually has no procedure and nothing is actually funded at all, because none of the founding members considered that a military organization represents an operational scale that does not actually translate 1:1 with an individual's personal finances??

-- Regarding individual salaries: Do people get annual raises even if their position stays the same? Like, if you're an unseated shinigami for 500 years are you paid the same on Day 1 as on Day 182,625?

-- How do people pick up their salaries? Is there a physical paycheck? Cash monies? Credits? Is the currency the same in the Seireitei as in Rukongai (is it used EVERYWHERE in Rukongai, by every one)? Rukia using credits on her phone from Living World-side bounties, so some portion of their commerce is digital… but is that only in Living World lol.

#asks #shinigamiology #no brain just bleach #bleach headcanons #we are very sorry this ask spent so long in our inbox but it was because we were so excited #about it that we put it in the solar-powered slow cooker and it took forever to finish

[troius]

The Kids in the Room

The Fullbringer Arc is tighter and more coherent than anything in the manga so far, telling a very straightforward story about a young person’s alienation from the world he lives in. It has very specific things to say about the role of parents, mentors, and friends in the process of a kid becoming an adult and does a pretty decent job of looking at how different organizations (the state, gangs) can play into that young person’s life. And then, at the climax of the story, it very intentionally takes all that hard work, and for what I must assume were business reasons, tosses it all away.

The Arrancar Arc was a glorious, grandiose mess. It featured no fewer than three separate worlds, four distinct factions, and probably around twenty characters with active character arcs. Although it started off with the truly breathtaking ambition of weaving all of this together, by the end Kubo had cut a considerable amount of the subplots in favor of actually getting to the end of the story he was telling. And it still mostly worked! Ichigo’s character arc, at least, ended where I think it was always going to: sacrificing his nigh-unlimited power after understanding the price of that power.

But of course, giving up all of your powers isn’t really a long-term solution for Ichigo, just like it isn’t for any of us in life. Ruling over three worlds might tend to corrupt a person, but we all want—and need—to feel like we have some power over our own lives. Ichigo, in his final year of high school, living on the precipice of adulthood, feels this in more than one way. He had this power. He sacrificed it. And yet now, he’d do anything to get it back. Anything except ask for help.

You see, asking for help is hard, but especially in the context of “seeking power”, which in this story is an even less veiled metaphor for “growing up” than it usually is in shonen manga. Asking for help means admitting both weakness (you don’t have the power to get what you want right now) and discontentment (there is something you want that you don’t have). For Ichigo, whose primary method of coping with his mother’s death was asserting a premature independence, this would be difficult even if the thing he was seeking wasn’t something he had very publicly given up in front of his friends and family. Yes, there are times when he doesn’t want to involve them to protect them, but a big part of his self-imposed isolation is his own ego, his unwillingness to reveal to people who love him just how miserable he is, out of fear that it will reveal him to be somebody they won’t love anymore.

And that’s where the Fullbringers come in. Ginjo puts in a tremendous amount of work into getting close to Ichigo—lying to him, giving him little bits of information piecemeal without telling him the whole thing, and of course, offering him power that Ichigo desperately wants. But none of it would be possible if Ichigo didn’t have this preexisting desire to do it all himself, or at least to appear to his friends and family like he’s doing it himself. Ginjo does what nobody else in Ichigo’s life does—offers him assistance without making him ask for it. Hook, line, sinker.

The body of the arc covers this masterclass in manipulation from Ginjo, and it’s a huge change from what has, up until this point, been a very standard shonen battle manga in terms of content, where the fights happen on a more or less weekly basis. Here, it takes over half the arc for Ichigo to fight anybody! It’s all character development, even for the side characters like Orihime and Chad, who don’t get fights of their own but do get to express themselves and show initiative in ways they were largely denied in the previous arc. It’s all a long, slow burn to the climax, where Tsukishima suddenly strips away the support system that Ichigo had so undervalued, leaving him defenseless against Ginjo’s theft of his power.

And that’s my big frustration with the climax. It’s not that I like the Karakura kids more than I like the Soul Reapers, although I very well might. It’s that so much work has been put into drawing out and developing these relationships, so much effort put into showing how this is affecting all of them. And it’s not just metatextual effort either—yes, we spend a lot of pagetime with Chad and Orihime and Uryu, but Xcution also targets them all because of their importance to Ichigo! The very story itself recognizes that they’re the support system that Ichigo needs to be an emotionally healthy adult! Any logical resolution must therefore involve them!

But it doesn’t. Instead, it’s the Soul Reapers, who have not been physically or even narratively present at all for four volumes, who come in and repower Ichigo. They’re the ones who pair up for the fights against Xcution, fights that are very light on the sort of character work that is so characteristic of Bleach fights because there just isn’t the grounding for it! Even the fights that show character are mostly showing development that seemingly occurred off-panel, leaving you wondering when exactly Toshiro and Ikkaku achieved their newfound maturity. But the supporting characters from the bulk of the arc are written out, and even the personal feelings of Shigekuni Genryusai Yamamoto wind up being more important to the narrative.

This isn’t just unsatisfactory on the level of the supporting characters, it also fatally undercuts Ichigo’s own development. We expect the story to end with him overcoming the challenge set in front of him, which at the beginning is clearly his alienation from the people he loves. But he doesn’t really do that—instead, the Soul Reapers showing up is what solves his problems, which suggests that the actual problem in his life is just “they weren’t around”. I don’t think that’s actually what we’re meant to take away here, and the narrative doesn’t seem to think so either, which is why we end with the character development being passed on to Soul Society instead. They learn something in this arc, which is to trust Ichigo. But he doesn’t seem to have learned a damn thing.

And that’s what frustrates me so much about this arc: the lost potential, the fact that there was a very obvious story being told that was abruptly discarded, right at the moment it mattered most. There was probably no way Kubo could have fulfilled all the potential of the Arrancar Arc: there were just to many characters, too many storylines. But here, he condensed his writing, narrowed his scope, and still told a compelling story up until he suddenly threw it all away. Whatever the reason for it-- and I have no insight into the editing or business pressures that might have motivated a climax so different from that the story was obviously building to-- it’s disappointing.

#Bleach #Troius reads Bleach #I spent the weekend on this lol #hope y'all are in the mood for 1200 words of my complaints about this arc #it just really annoys me when an author appropriately limits their ambition and yet still fucks it up #anyhow I'll have more positive content out this week #my six hearts vs Xcution matchups #but I wanted to get this out first so you knew where I was coming from #wrap up post

[ichinoue]

Has Ichigo ever had any individual monologues or thoughts about Orihime like he has with Rukia? Has he ever specifically singled her and her importance on his life out? Besides the "I will protect her" moment which I know was absolutely about Orihime. Signed, an Ichiruki who doesn't hate Orihime and likes Ichihime a tad but wants a different take other than from other Ichiruki shippers.

Nope. And I think that was deliberate on Kubo's part.

Because Ichigo's feelings for Orihime were supposed to be hidden, they were supposed to be a secret, a mystery that the reader was meant to figure out over time, rather than being spoon-fed a quick and easy "I love Orihime" monologue. I believe Kubo chose to show, not tell when it came to Ichigo's feelings for Orihime. Which makes for so much better and interesting writing.

It was "safe" to share with the reader Ichigo's thoughts about Rukia (or Chad, or Ishida, or whoever else) in monologues, because his thoughts about her weren't romantic; he could monologue about her being important in his life, because that was absolutely true, but there wasn't anything deeper than that in a romantic sense. There weren't any hidden feelings for her that Kubo risked unveiling if we delved into his thoughts. So there was no fear of spoiling the ending of "who will end up with who?" or feeling the need to pair people up too early once feelings have been confirmed on both sides (and Kubo said he purposely waited until the end to pair the couples up).

We read Ichigo's thoughts about Rukia, and what did we learn? That it was all platonic! He never expressed any feelings of romance in those monologues. His motivations and reasoning were made clear.

While Orihime...? We had *no idea* what he was thinking about when it came to her. Kubo purposely kept it hidden. He could have been thinking anything (😏😉🤫) because we just didn't know. And not knowing left the door wide open for the possibility of him having feelings for her.

We could only make inferences based off of his actions, the way he acted towards her and around her, and pick up on the patterns over time, how it all pointed to his purposely hidden feelings for her.

You can see it in the way his usual prickly disposition softens around her, the way his enemies target her more than anyone else just to get to him, the blind rage when his enemies taunt him about her, his all-out panic when he thinks she's in danger, how flustered he gets when people tease him about her, the depression when he realized she was abducted, the puppy dog eye way he looks at her when he realizes she's okay again.

You see him looking at her with relief whenever she cries and thanks him for being okay after a battle, you see his shoulders sag with guilt as he apologizes for failing to protect her, you see him bowing before her when he makes the vow to protect, grinning as he tells Grimmjow he's not allowed to get hurt anymore because Orihime said so, rising up from the dead for her, getting stronger when she's near him in the gamespace, the rage when Tsukishima calls her on the phone in front of him, the devastation in his eyes when she heals Tsukishima's arm, the trust he feels in asking her to go two-to-one against Yhwach.

You never hear him thinking about any of this--not once. But you don't need to. It all became so obvious over time.

#IchiHime #how did I end up with so many messages dfkjgdkfgjk

[sashi-ya]

[𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬] 𝐒𝐞𝐱𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐁𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

✦ answering to this question from Byakuya anon 🌸. ✦ tw: slightly nsfw. especially the last hc. mentions of sex. nudity. taking baths together and the things I ll never have if I keep dating real men. ✦ an: pls follow the link to listen to Byakuya's VA singning the song I mention in the hcs ♡. The manga panel used for the banner is slightly altered, he isn't smiling in the original one. (sorry Kubo, I needed to) ✦ wc: 664

➜ Taking baths together. Not always they end on sex, specially when both have to attend the Gotei’s matters. But, Byakuya is so meticulous and delicate, he will take the time to treat you like the noble you are. Both will wash your hairs. His soft hands applying essential oils, both deserve -and enjoy the best-. Speaking of baths, Byakuya doesn’t seem to understand how naturally handsome and sensual he is; whenever he takes shower alone you are absolutely allowed to sit outside to chat about the day -to chat and drool at him acting so nonchalantly, letting the sunrays of a new day filter and kiss his pale skin…

➜ Trips to most exclusive destinations in the world of the living. Would you like to put on your Gigai and go relax at the beaches of Bali? Sure. Would you like to visit Paris? Of course, as long as you don’t make him eat from a boulangerie, he would be ok with it. Venice, for the carnival you say? let's go. By the way, Venice seems to be one of his favourite places; and yours too. During one of those nights, while staying at the Gritti Palace Hotel, with white sheets tumbled and the big window showing you the great canal, Byakuya would start singing “Bella Notte” while you dance… maybe naked, or maybe already dressed for a romantic dinner at the terrace.

➜ Looking at each other with prying eyes during social events/Gotei’s meetings. Dark blue sky eyes, sharp look scanning you, calling you to look at him. He is the type of man that will kill for you, that possess you but never cuts your freedom. Instead, he wins your exclusivity with a pleading stare that can melt your heart; Yes, that cold sight everybody always mention, with you is warm, is fire and love. You feel his attention need, your eyes search for his. A subtle smirk is enough to make Byakuya swallow and softly stretch his neck muscles. You may think he is trying to look more severe than normal, with more superiority, but he isn’t… he is just trying to process the way your sexy look makes his body feel. (You really believe nobody realizes, but everybody does, and they are all happy. Kuchiki Taicho needed you…) .

➜ Cooking Wakame Taiishii cookies together. He has a special cutter with the form of Wakame ambassador (and one of Chappy, whenever Rukia is around). You might know exactly how to make the dough, but, do you want him to stop telling you? Of course not. “Byakuya, love… come help me”. “Uhum” he would hum, coming from behind, stretching his arms, and placing his chin on your shoulder. “See? You should roll out the dough this… way”. The subtle weight of his body on yours, and your back arching just enough for your glutes to graze his crotch often ends up with burn cookies...

➜ Training, fighting. Nothing is sweeter, sexier, and more sensual than you and him sweating under the sun, wielding your Zanpakutos, crossing the edges of such powerful swords. A competition that leads both into being stronger, releasing the pressure of the day, putting your bodies at max… to end up tired, so tired after.

➜ And, as tired as you end up from training, both will cuddle in bed after. And I believe that, Byakuya is into a softer version of sleep play. He loves, adores, to delicately press his body against yours, to kiss your shoulder or for you to do it. Mumbling sleepy loving words with lips lingering, sloppy eyelids, the scent of your bodies lulling you to dream with paradise. And, if your bodies still respond… making love with no crazy positions, going slow, from the side, playing with your hair or you tracing little circles with your fingertip on his back. Fall asleep still inside you with a whispery “I love you”

#byakuya kuchiki x reader #kuchiki byakuya x reader #byakuya x reader #byakuya kuchiki imagine #byakuya x you #kuchiki byakuya #byakuya kuchiki x you #kuchiki byakuya x you #byakuya #kuchiki byakuya imagine #byakuya kuchiki #bleach #bleach headcanons #bleach imagines #bleach byakuya #bleach x reader #bleach anime #bleach fanart

[rikeijo]

Today's translation #525

Yuri!!! on Life official guidebook, Toshiharu Mizutani (Art Director) interview

-- This show went into quite a realistic directions - I suppose you had a lot of reference materials to use as art director.

M: In recent projects, [art directors] take part in the pre-production stage and participate in the research, too. I also sometimes go out there to do research, but in this case, it was Yamamoto Director and Kubo-san, and other members of staff, who went to a lot of different places for research and brought back quite a lot of reference materials. We also have an art settings designer, who is responsible for designing basic reference materials, Tamura Seiki-san, on the team, in addition to the art director, and he had already made a lot of preparations before I joined the team, so unfortunately, I wasn't able to participate in research this time.

-- How did you split all the work between you and the art setting designer?

This time, we all were very busy and it wasn't really possible for one art director to be responsible for just one task, from the beginning to the end, because all kinds of tasks had to be accomplished at the same time. I normally start preparation for the next project, just as the current one is about to end. But recently the number of projects increased, and we have to deal with staff shortage and schedules have to accommodate that, and so the offers come in very early. Like two months earlier than normally. In times like that, I usually send somebody to take my place and make all sorts of preparations, before I can get more time to actually join in. In those cases, when I have to work on two projects at the same time, and I can't focus on one, the designer is the one who does the work very properly.

[Notes: Back to staff interviews for a while!

Future plans:

I found out the other day that there is a sound recording of the Festival event out there... It's mostly perfectly understandable, except for a few moments, where the crowd is too loud to hear anything... I've never seen a transcription or full translation, so I'll put it also on my list of things to translate! ~ ✨ It's quite a cute story, although it's reeeeeeeeally crazy.

I also really want to do Mitsurou's commentary, bc it's full of interesting info, but I need to have a DVD player that will work with my laptop for that, so it might take a moment...]

#yuri on ice #yoi translations #yuri on ice translation

[recurring-polynya]

Bleach Returns Day 7: Always by your side / Betrayal / History

Got the trifecta on this one, baby, but it wasn't that hard, because Kubo loves packaging these three things together (if you allow interpreting 'history' as 'long personal history together', which I do).

Anyway, I'm never not thinking about Ichigo and Renji's first fight, and for a long time, I've been thinking about what happened immediately after Byakuya, Rukia and Renji returned to Soul Society, specifically that Rukia had to be extracted from her gigai by Squad 2 and then thrown in a holding cell and I am sure B didn't stick around for all that, which makes this the first private conversation Rukia and Renji got to have in 40 years.

| ao3 | ff.net | 2225 words, rated Teen for cussin' (tbf they both had a lot to cuss about)

How many Onmitsukidou operatives does it take to get one soul out of a gigai? Renji wonders idly to himself. There is no punchline. All of this is one big joke, but certainly not the funny kind.

“This would probably go a lot faster if we could take her down to one of our medical units,” the Squad 2 spook who appears to be in charge of this shitshow says, sidling up to Renji. “Sir.”

“Sure,” says Renji. “Let’s go.”

“You don’t have clearance to accompany us, sir, but--”

“Then, no.”

“I could go fetch our Vice-Captain, if that would reassure you.”

“Go ahead,” Renji replies, calling the man’s bluff. Dealing with that blowhard Omaeda would really put the icing on the clusterfuck this entire night has been. On the other hand, it’s 2am, and even though the only part of this poor ninja’s face he can see is the eyes, he can tell how badly this guy does not want to have to go wake up his awful boss.

Renji makes a mental note to make sure all his subordinates know that he’d much rather be woken up at 2am than to catch wind later that they tried to start shit with some other squad’s vice-captain.

Fortunately, Rukia, whose timing is impeccable as always, manages to finally part ways with her horrible bootleg gigai, drawing in a huge breath of air with a loud, raspy gasp.

“How much soul fixer did you take?” one of the other spooks asks her pointedly. “That stuff is terrible for you.”

Rukia tells the guy to blow it out his ass, and Renji’s heart skips three beats. For the last few hours, he’s been studying her, watching, listening, trying to figure out if there’s anything of his Rukia left in her at all. The only thing that’s seemed familiar was that charade she put on at the end, acting all high and mighty and offended on the behalf of her noble brother. It’s been 40 years, but there was something in her posture, the resonance of her voice…classic tells of Rukia doing a bit. Maybe she wasn’t doing a bit, though. Maybe that’s just Rukia-as-Kuchiki. Renji’s spent more than a few sleepless nights wondering how in five realms Rukia would manage to turn herself into a noble. Faking it ‘til she made it was usually at the top of the list, but maybe her Kuchiki self would always have a ring of falsehood to it.

Captain Kuchiki often seems like he is doing a bit, too.

“I want a receipt for that gigai,” Renji announces.

The spook does a full-body cringe, and slouches off, muttering unflattering things about the Sixth Division. Renji doesn’t care. Hard-ass, rule-abiding vice-captain of Kuchiki squad is not a bit. It’s who he is now.

When the receipt comes, it’s actually a petty cash voucher with “GIGAI” written in the “Received” column, but it’s got a mostly legible signature and Squad 2 letterhead, and also it’s two in the fucking a.m., so Renji takes it.

“You need to borrow a pair of shackles?” the spook asks dryly. “Can put that on the receipt, too.”

Renji’s blood stops flowing, just for a second. Rukia is watching him. He hadn’t thought about this. She’s come along willingly up until now. He wishes he could trust her to continue in the same vein, but he can’t, both because she’s not trustworthy, and because the Vice-Captain of the Sixth isn’t a guy who lets his guard down on account of old friendships.

“No,” he says, and Rukia’s eyes narrow, ever so slightly. He jerks his chin at her. “Hands behind your back, if you don’t mind. Don’t need any dislocated shoulders.”

Her face becomes passive again as he casts bakudou number one on her. It’s easy enough that he doesn’t embarrass himself, although with the way this night has been going, it would certainly be no surprise.

A few minutes later, they step out into the night air, free of Squad 2 at last. There’s a breeze, which downgrades the humidity from “insufferable” to “unpleasant”, even just briefly. A thunderstorm was just finding its legs when they left the World of the Living. Renji wishes they would get one here, too, but it doesn’t seem to be in the cards.

The streets are empty at this time of night. Rukia looks straight ahead as they walk. There’s a hollowness to her eyes.

Renji’s not an idiot. Well. He is, but he’s not a fucking idiot. Rukia is not a person who shares her heart easily, but it’s because when she does, she carves off an entire piece and dumps it in your hands, bloody and tender. Why the Hell she would do so for some human kid is absolutely beyond Renji. They only live for about five days anyway and everything they do is absolutely nonsensical. Maybe some of it was that weird gigai. Probably messed with her head. She’ll likely be fine in a few hours. Well. Maybe not fine, but at least worried about the things she ought to be worrying about.

Renji thinks about all the things he had planned out to say to her. He had spent hours rolling them around in his head all through his last weeks at Squad Eleven. Even wrote some down on paper in little bulleted lists, like the study guides Momo used to make when they were at the Academy. He can’t say any of them now. He can’t say them because Rukia boned a routine mission so thoroughly that at least three other squads had gotten pulled into it. He can’t say them because, in his idiotic confidence that there had to be some logical explanation for all of it, that he and Captain Kuchiki would be able to swoop in and make things right for her, that he made both an asshole of himself and lost a fight pathetically, to a child. Finally, he can’t say them to her, because he is the Vice-Captain of the Sixth. And she is his prisoner.

Renji has never been much of an apologizer, and Rukia isn’t a person who requires apologies, but the absence of one hangs heavy between them. He can’t apologize for following orders though. Vice-Captain of the Sixth strikes again.

“You really didn’t need to stand there and glower at them for every second of that,” Rukia says, in a way that sounds like she’s talking to herself, but he knows is directed at him. “You’ve gotta feel kinda disgusting.”

Renji bristles. “What I feel is none of your business. Someone’s in my custody, and you think I’m gonna leave them alone with a bunch of slimy Squad 2 spooks for a single second?”

Rukia stares at him for a long moment. “I just meant that you could have gone to the washroom. You do know your face is covered in blood, right?”

Renji’s hand goes reflexively to his forehead. It feels mostly dried, at least. “Oh,” he says stupidly.

“Your chin, too.”

Renji grinds his teeth.

“It’s fine,” Rukia says lightly. “Impressive, I suppose, to someone who didn’t see how it happened. You certainly intimidated the shit out of those Squad Two morons.” She cocks an eyebrow at him slyly. “You gotta handkerchief on you? Let me out of this bind, I’ll wipe off your face for you.”

He tips his head to the side and regards her out of the corner of his eye. “Not a chance.”

“I had to give it a try,” she sniffs. “It’s not as if you wouldn’t catch me in two seconds if I tried to give you the slip.”

“Give it up,” he warns. “It won’t work on me. I know you too well.”

Rukia falls quiet and he regrets saying it. Forty years of working to raise himself to her level, and it feels like all he can do is remind her where they both came from.

“Renji,” she says, after a long pause, “about that.”

“Forget it,” he says.

She ignores him, just as she always has. “It wasn’t fair of me,” she says, “to grab your arm like that.”

He wishes he had to wrack his brain to figure out what she’s talking about, but the memory of tiny fingers wrapping over his knuckles, her knee jabbing the soft space between his shoulder blades, the sudden familiar weight of her hanging off his back.

Even without her powers, Rukia is still a soldier. She knows pressure points. She had access to his throat, his windpipe, his carotid. But instead, she grabbed his sword hand. A request. A plea, maybe. Don’t do it. Let him live.

She weighs nothing. Her gigai had the strength of a human girl. The only thing staying his arm was the unspeakable weight of their history together.

Time freezes. In Renji’s mind, the human kid’s fingers close on the hilt of his stupid, oversized sword.

Renji sparred against Rukia at the Academy, and they used to scrap as kids, sometimes more seriously than others, but Rukia has always had his back when it really mattered.

If Kurosaki had the least idea of what he was actually doing, he probably could have run Renji straight through, and Renji would have just stood there, his mouth hanging open like an idiot. He keeps telling himself that this was not Rukia’s intent. Maybe she thought better of his battle reflexes. He sure wishes he did. She only expected the kid to run. She probably has no idea how much hold she still has on his heart. Or, y’know. Maybe not. To all of it.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Rukia grumbles. “I don’t regret it. I would do it again. I’m just saying that it wasn’t fair of me to ask that much of you.”

“If you think I got my ass kicked as some sort of favor to you, you’re giving yourself a little too much credit,” Renji grunts. “That incompetence was 100% genuine and unfaked, but thanks for the show of confidence.”

“Oh, no, that was obvious.” She sighs and falls quiet.

He wonders what she thinks he would have done, if it had turned out he had any say in the matter. Does she think he would have spared Ichigo? Is this her inscrutable, Rukia version of a thank you? Or does she think he would have killed the kid, that leniency was too big an ask, and she doesn’t particularly hold it against him? Maybe she’s asking him to explain himself. What difference would it make? From her point of view, he has no particular incentive to tell her the truth, only whatever he wants her to hear.

“You…you can’t have worked for my brother for very long,” she finally says in a way that implies she’s not entirely sure of this fact. “You definitely didn’t work for him before I left, did you?”

“I just started,” Renji assures her.

“Well, then, maybe you don’t know him very well, but--”

“I know him well enough.”

Rukia’s mouth hangs open for a second. She licks her lips. “I see.” And then she smiles. Just a small one. Maybe a little bit rueful.

“What?” Renji demands peevishly. “What, exactly, do you see?”

“Just that you know, then. That he hates leaving things half done. That for as cool as he sounded, it probably caused him physical pain to leave Ichigo there without finishing him off.”

“You asked him to,” Renji shrugs. “It was a favor.” Her hand on his sword arm. A dramatic performance of a dutiful, penitent sister. Rukia always knows just the right way to ask for what she wants.

“You probably know that he’s not too generous with favors, either,” Rukia points out. “You could have reminded him that leaving humans with illicitly gained shinigami powers to expire of their wounds isn’t proper procedure.”

Renji doesn’t reply.

“You didn’t though.”

That’s right. He didn’t. It didn’t even occur to him. It should have. But Vice-Captain of the Sixth is still something he has to think about doing, and slipping into the support role on one of Rukia’s grifts has always been as natural as breathing.

Renji can see Squad Six’s gate up ahead. He is so tired. He just wants this night to be over.

“I woulda gone along with just about anything if it would get you to stop digging yourself a grave so deep you were about to break through to Hell, okay?”

She hums in agreement and makes a small nod.

“You’re such a pain in my ass, you know that, Rukia?”

She gives a soft snort. “Yeah,” she says, “I know.”

#bleach returns 2023 #renruki #renji abarai #rukia kuchiki #my writing