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#lee jeno
asthmark · a year ago
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❝ 10 things i know about you ❞ l.jn
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synopsis → there are ten important things you learn about lee jeno during your time in quarantine.
request → “if you're still accepting requests, can u make a domestic roommate!jeno? 🥺🥺 thank you and have a nice dayyy”
word count → 7.1k (bruhhh)
sharing an apartment with lee jeno isn’t ideal.
it’s not that he’s a lousy roommate or that you disliked him in any way; you just didn’t know him. you had first met through a mutual friend. they knew jeno was looking for someone to split rent with and that you happened to need a place to stay. they promised you he would give you privacy and assured jeno you were excellent roommate material. with that, arrangements were made and soon enough you moved in together. of course, it was a bit awkward at first but you two eventually got used to each other’s presence. although you were never in the same room for too long and oftentimes went days without speaking, you coexisted.
for a long time, you only knew a couple things about your roommate. for example, you were aware of his strong love for cats, especially his pet calico, seol. you also knew he kept the freezer stocked with pizza rolls that he would use as energy when he stayed up all night playing video games.
what you didn’t know, however, was that you would be spending the next couple months locked in your apartment with him. on top of that, you would begin to learn more things about him—his life, his personality, his feelings.
there are ten important things you learn about lee jeno during your time in quarantine.
       1. he’s a heavy sleeper.
at 10:28 in the morning you find yourself seated at the dining table in the kitchen, spooning froot loops into your mouth. as you stuff your face, you scroll through your phone for entertainment. you decide to open instagram first but you quickly find that to be a mistake. as soon as you open the app a picture of lucas and who you thought was his ex-girlfriend greets you. if that was bad, the caption hits you like a ton of bricks.
@lucas_xx444: should have never left you
in only five words, lucas has completely erased the months you spent dating. it meant nothing to him. sure, things hadn’t ended things the best way but going right back to his toxic ex and even admitting to missing her—now that was a new low. was this his way of getting back at you? his way of making you hurt just like he had throughout your entire relationship? the thought alone leaves you feeling sick.
you decide you’ve already had enough social media for one morning so you decide to check your messages instead. your friends usually left a couple of them overnight. to your surprise, you find that your main group chat has accumulated 241 messages.
[10:48 am] you: good morning i see u guys have been vry chatty
[10:49 am] yeji: ur finally awake!
[10:50 am] yuna: we thought u died lol
[10:50 am] lia: YUNA
[10:50 am] lia: NO
[10:51 am] ryujin: the timing for that joke could not be worse
[10:52 am] yuna: humor is my coping mechanism leave me alone
[10:52 am] you: ??? what happened
[10:53 am] chaeryeong: we left msgs for a reason dummy read them!!
[10:53 am] you: umm there’s over 200 and im not abouta read all that
[10:54 am] yuna: well then lemme break it down
[10:54 am] yuna: the world is ending :)
[10:55 am] you: welp it was about time
[10:55 am] lia: why r u guys like this
[10:56 am] yeji: there’s been a covid-19 outbreak and it’s spreading like wildfire so the government issued a stay at home order :/
[10:57 am] you: omg WHAT
[10:57 am] ryujin: ikr it’s crazy we literally can’t go anywhere
[10:57 am] chaeryeong: and we can’t get boba today either ;( i was so looking forward to that
[10:58 am] ryujin: let’s pls take a moment of silence for all the current and future boba dates that will have to be cancelled
[10:59 am] yuna: no way am i gonna let some wannabe flu make me go boba-less i’m still going out >:(
[10:59 am] lia: ...ur joking right
[10:59 am] yeji: what color casket do u want yuna?
before the groupchat can distract you any further, you place your phone down on the table. you sit back in your chair and let the newly revealed information sink in.
you were stuck inside.
you sigh before standing to clean your dishes. as you’re scrubbing away at your bowl, you feel something brush against your leg. you smile, not even having to look down to know it was seol. the cat would often wander into your room or sleep next to you when you watched tv on the couch. in fact, you were pretty sure you spent more time with seol than his owner.
you gaze at jeno’s room. as always, the door is shut. you wonder if you should let him know what was happening. you two usually kept your distance but you figured that the circumstance you found yourself in was an exception. you quickly dry your hand and shuffle towards his room.
you knock once, quite softly. you assume he’s asleep so you try again, this time a little harder. still, no avail. the third time you put even more force into it. by this time, seol has found his way beside you and claws at the door.
“jeno?” you knock a fourth time. “jeno! lee jeno!”
after more shouting accompanied by incessant meowing, you hear some muffled movement. moments later the door knob twists open and there stands your roommate with disheveled hair and a robe that had obviously just been thrown on his body. seol has taken the open crack in the door as an invitation inside the bedroom.
jeno blinks a couple times as he watches the feline get himself comfortable on his bed. he turns back to you, looking slightly disoriented. you’re not sure if he’s half asleep or your sudden presence has thrown him for a loop. his voice comes out raspy when he asks, “was he, um, bothering you or something?”
you shake your head, vigorously. “that’s not why i came. it’s just that my friends told me that there’s been some kind of virus outbreak and we’re supposed to stay home. so, i thought i’d let you know.”
his face softens. “oh, cool.” suddenly, the look changes. “not the virus thing! that’s totally not cool. i meant, it’s cool that you let me know and stuff. you just saved me a huge freak out so, uh, thank you.”
you smile and nod. “no problem.”
jeno’s eyes linger as you retreat back into your room down the hall. the sound of his door shutting is heard only once you’re out of his eyesight.
   2.    he can cook better than you.
most of the time, you would go out to eat dinner with your friends in the evenings or at least stop by a drive thru. obviously, this was no longer possible in the midst of a pandemic. you found that to be incredibly frustrating as you sat on your bed, stomach empty. no matter how badly you wished to fix it, your laziness had gotten the best of you. apart from that, you already knew how unlucky you were when it came to cooking—the memory of burning noodles at lia’s house one night had been permanently seared into your brain.
you almost believe your mind is playing tricks on you when you catch a whiff of pasta in the air. for a moment you think it’s your next door neighbor, taeyong, cooking again. you knew he was quite the chef. but, the smell is getting stronger by the second and you decide it must be in your apartment.
you wander into the kitchen, only to find jeno standing over the stove. he’s stirring red sauce in a pot when he notices you watching him.
“oh, hey,” he greets with a polite wave.
you can only stare at the rest of the kitchen—pots, pans, and ingredients all over the place—in utter awe.
he chuckles, awkwardly. “yeah, sorry about the mess. i’ve been told i’m a decent cook but i can never seem to get the tidiness down.”  
“no, it’s not that. this just all seems so... professional.” you sniff the air once more. “smells amazing, too.”
he smiles, sheepishly. “thanks. are you a fan of spaghetti?”
you nod.
“good. i wanted to make something you’d like.”
“you really didn’t have to,” you say, leaning against the fridge. “i mean, i’ve never done anything for you.”
he uncovers a pot to check on the pasta. you watch as hot steam rises out of it. “what about this morning?”
you can’t help but laugh. “that most certainly does not count. you’re making an entire meal. that takes a lot of effort.”
he waves a hand, dismissively. “i used to cook a lot with my old roommate, doyoung. the guy was an asian gordon ramsey, i swear. so, yeah, this is nothing too crazy. and i really do enjoy it.”
“well, i’m still gonna repay you.” you fold your arms.
he looks away from his dish to raise a brow. “is that so?”
you nod in confirmation. “definitely.”
“tell you what, if you wash the mountain of dishes that are gonna be left over, we’ll be even.”
you stare at the sink that’s already overflowing with dirty kitchen tools. that wasn’t even half of it. “uh, sure, sounds good.”
he laughs at hearing the uncertainty in your voice. “that’s the spirit.”
   3.    he’s allergic to cats.
the familiar sound of soft purring is what pulls you attention away from the movie playing on your laptop. already knowing exactly who it is, you launch yourself off your bed to allow your furry guest inside.  
“hey seol. what’ve you been up to?”
the calico meows, almost as if he were responding to your question. you close your door and go back to your original position. you notice seol sitting directly in front of your bed, looking up at you with wide eyes.
“come on up.” you pat your sheets, invitingly.
he obeys and stretches before laying down beside you.
“have you ever watched ‘avengers’?” you ask, eyes going back to the explosive fight scene on the screen.
this time, seol doesn’t even bother humoring you with a meow. he stays silent with his head tucked into his paws.
you scratch his head and his tail wiggles. “i’ve gotta stop asking you questions.”
both you and seol’s heads snap towards the door when you hear a knock.
“come in!” you call out.  
jeno swings open the door. his eyes briefly scan the room before landing on the furball on your bed. the unmistakable look of adoration shines in his eyes when he sees how lovingly you caress him.
“seol! what are you doing in here? bothering y/n?” the cat jumps off your bed and towards his owner standing in your doorway. jeno scoops him into his arms and faces you. “i’m so sorry. he saw me running a bath for him and bolted.”
“it’s all good. he’s a great movie buddy. besides, i could always use the company.”
jeno curiously glances at your computer screen. “is that ‘avengers’?”
“yep. i’ve seen it like a dozen times.”
“same here.“ he pauses. “hey, if you ever need a movie buddy—like you know, one that talks—just let me know.”
your face lights up. “i’m gonna hold you to that.”
”i hope so. well, if you’ll excuse me, i’ve gotta give this guy a bath.”
seol yowls as if he understands the meaning behind the words and attempts to escape jeno’s grip.    
“here we go again,” he mumbles under his breath.
you snicker at the sight. “looks like you could use some help.”
“oh, no. it’s fine. he can just be a little bratty someti—seol!”
in the blink of an eye, the feline has successfully hopped out of his arms and made a run for it.
jeno gives you an exasperated look before rushing off to catch his runway pet. you find yourself caught up in the excitement so you follow him, the two of you now in pursuit of the calico. you’re sure the image of you both chasing the fluffy animal around the apartment looks like something straight out of a comedy. even you and jeno can’t contain your laughter when he finally catches seol only for him to slip out of his hold a second later. this exact situation repeats itself a couple times before you finally get lucky.
“i got him!” you screech. “jeno! oh my god! what do i do?”
“bathroom, bathroom, bathroom!” he chants in response.
you head in that direction with jeno trailing behind you, ready to catch seol if he somehow manages to get out of your death grip. you bend over the bathtub, slowly lowering the cat into the water. it’s clear he doesn’t have a problem with making a fuss as he wails and flails his limbs around.
after a while, he finally calms down enough that you can lather him in shampoo. jeno insists on scrubbing him, arguing that you had already done way too much. you sit back on your heels, observing the way the seol leans into his delicate touches.
“looks like he likes it now.”
“he likes to make a big deal but he ends up enjoying it every—“ jeno cuts himself off with a sneeze.
“tissue?” you offer.
he shakes his head. “that’s okay, thanks. i’m used to it. i’m just surprised my allergies haven’t acted up ‘til now.”
“allergies?” you echo.
“yeah, i’m allergic to—“ another sneeze. “cats.”
your eyes widen. “really? and you still have seol?”
“i could never get rid of him. he’s too good of a boy. isn’t—“ sneeze. “that right?” he tickles seol under his chin.
“wow. you must really love him.”
“so much.”
“he’s lucky to have you.”
“what about you? you get both of us. doesn’t that make you the luckiest?”
you snort. “i guess it does.”
   4.    he makes a good shopping buddy.
“i have officially cooked everything we have.”
“i can order some takeout, if you want?”
he juts his lower lip out and gives you puppy eyes. “but i like to cook for you.”
you laugh at his expression. “oh god, you look like that one pouty emoji people use when they try to be cute.”
he sits up. “did it work?”
you nod and pinch his cheek.
he yelps. “ah, stop! you’re acting like my grandma!” he manages to get out of your grasp. he rubs his face, soothing the spots you had squeezed. “seriously, though, we really do need to stock up on food.”
“i’ve already been looking into it.” you show him the screen of your phone. “says here you can still go shopping as long as you wear a mask and try to stay six feet away from other shoppers.”
he cringes. “i don’t know if i like the idea of being so close to so many people.”
“i can go by myself, then,” you suggest with a shrug.
he doesn’t hesitate to deny you. “no way are you going alone.” his possessive tone has you staring at him curiously so he adds, “you know, in case you can’t reach something on the top shelf.”
the teasing comment paired with his innocent smile makes you gasp in disbelief. “lee jeno! that’s low! and to think i almost thought you were worried about me.”
“who said i wasn’t?” he smiles at you again before standing up. “i’m going to find us some masks and then we can head out.”  
once you arrive at your local grocery store, you find it to be packed. everyone seems to be in a hurry, grabbing things left and right.
“wow, it’s already gotten crazy,” jeno mumbles, stopping to stare at the flood of people that rush by.
you don’t hesitate to scold him. “well, don’t just stand there! we gotta get our stuff before there’s nothing left!”
without another word you slip into the frenzy of people. jeno struggles to stay behind you. after almost losing sight of you a couple times, he walks a little faster to catch up and places his arm firmly around your waist once he does. you look up at him, your mask covering your slightly agape mouth.
being the gentleman he is, he apologizes. “sorry but i don’t want us to get separated.”
you can only nod and mumble, “good idea.”
jeno pushes the shopping cart with his right hand and holds your figure with his left. once in a while, you’ll break apart from each other to grab an item you need but once it’s in the cart, he’ll make sure you end up in the same position. after an hour or so, you’ve grabbed enough and you decide it’s time to pay.
despite the mask she has on, you can tell the middle-aged woman behind the cash register has a big smile on her face once she catches sight of you and your roommate.
“well, just look at you two.” she sighs. “how cute.”
“oh.” you glance at her then jeno then her again. “oh, no. it’s not like that.”
you attempt to move yourself away from jeno only to find his grip to be so incredibly strong that you almost begin to think he’s trying to hold you in place. once you finally detach yourself from him, you begin loading your groceries onto the counter for the employee to scan. she does so, but not before giving you a displeased look.  
“oh really? he holds you like that because you aren’t together?”
jeno assists her in placing the scanned items in bags. “i didn’t want to lose her.”
she pauses scanning a can of tuna to stare him down. “darling, that sounds like a line from a cheesy hallmark rom-com.”
you can’t help but chuckle. “what he means is that there’s a lot of people here and we didn’t want to get separated.”
jeno adds, “desperate times calls for desperate measures.”
the woman adjusts her glasses. “well, you do certainly seem desperate to have her close to you.”
jeno doesn’t say a word as he continues bagging but his smile reaches his eyes.
   5.    he works out.
why did the pandemic have to hit in the middle of summer?
you often asked yourself this, complaining about how inconvenient it was. especially on the days that made your apartment feel like it was on fire. the days that required a thin tank top and shorts. even then, you found yourself to be drenched in sweat.
you sprawled your arms and legs farther on the sofa, the leather material proving to be very uncomfortable. it was either that or your bed with the warm cotton sheets that stuck to your body. just thinking about it brings you discomfort. the only relief you could think of was a cold shower. you would have already taken one if jeno hadn’t been hogging the one bathroom in the apartment.
“jeno!” you yell.
silence; other than the sound of the water running.
“lee jeno!”
the water stops, temporarily for him to shout back an answer. “what?!”
you wipe at the sweat that has accumulated on the bridge of your nose. “hurry up! i’m melting!”
the water starts back up again and you groan. hoping to distract yourself, you pull out your phone. the group chat with your friends is surprisingly silent so you go to instagram for some entertainment. this time, your ex-boyfriend’s post isn’t the first thing you see. it takes you some scrolling but you do end up seeing another one of his pictures.
it’s simply two intertwined hands with a black and white filter. you identify the one on the left as his and although you aren’t as familiar with the one on the right, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out who it belongs to. contrary to the last, this photo has no cheesy words for a caption, just a red heart.  
but, your stomach doesn’t drop. you don’t feel hurt, either. obviously, you still don’t enjoy seeing him just because of all the awful memories that came with it but other than that, you feel unaffected by the image.
in fact, you feel so confident in yourself that you block him.
you’re surprised you hadn’t done it sooner. you had known you didn’t need him in your life any longer so why keep in contact? you feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders when you press the red button that would keep him and his girlfriend out of your life. you knew with your whole heart that you didn’t need to see either of them.
before, a bit if you had felt the need to keep an eye on him. to see how he was handling the breakup and torture yourself with the fact that he didn’t seem to care. now, you could say you truly didn’t either. you didn’t need him or his stupid pictures. you had other, better things.
your friends.
your cat (yes, you considered seol to be yours).
your roommate.
you had to admit, jeno was the best thing on that list. quarantine had brought you and him significantly closer and you were over the moon about it. he was so wonderful that you kicked yourself for having lived with him for so long without ever really getting to know him. but it was easy to say you two were making up for lost time seeing as you spent every waking moment together. the record long showers jeno took being an exception, of course.
the moment the door to the bathroom opens, you rush into your room and quickly grab an oversized t-shirt and loose pajama pants to change into after your shower. you nearly drop them when you’re met with jeno’s soaking figure in the hallway.
his hair is damp and you can clearly see how long it had become. his skin looks healthy and moisturized, lotion among other skin care products had probably been applied. what really has you in a shock is the fact that the towel barely hangs below his waist. the droplets of water that fall from his hair and down his neck trail down his chest and toned torso towards the only area he has bothered to cover up. his bulky arms are also slightly wet, his veins popping noticeably. he shakes his head in an attempt to rid his hair of any water. then he runs his fingers through it, his muscles flexing ever so slightly as he does so.
“dude!” you exclaim, without a second thought. “you’re ripped!”
he smiles, his round cheeks growing at the unexpected praise. the way he could have such a rugged body but soft-featured face puzzled you to no extent. “thank you. i lift sometimes.”
“sometimes?” you repeat. “don’t be so humble! you’re basically hercules!”
he clicks his tongue. “ah, c’mon. i’m just an athletic person.”
you keep admiring his physique. “clearly.”
“oh god,” he groans, obviously flustered. “you’re looking at me like you’re gonna eat me or something.”
you hold yourself back from making a less than appropriate innuendo. “no comment.”
his eyebrows shoot up in disbelief. “quarantine is really making you go crazy.”
you point a finger at him. “you try being stuck inside with your hot roommate!”
“trust me, y/n, i know all about hot roommates.”
you tilt your head, acting purposefully oblivious. “are you talking about doyoung?”
“what? no i—“ he sighs. “you know what, just take your shower.”
   6.    you can’t say no to him.
jeno ruffles his black locks with his hand and frowns.
you give him a disappointed look. “knock it off, you’re gonna get dandruff in your soup.”
he ignores your comment. “i look like a hobo.”
you pause, spoon halfway to your mouth. “this i know.”
“y/n, this is serious!”
“okay, okay. what’s the issue?”
“i already told you! i’m a bum!”
“you? a bum?” you pause to think about it. “i mean, mentally? maybe. but physically? no.”
“my hair, though. it’s so long.” he grabs a strand of it and pulls it to emphasize his point.
you shrug. “if having lots of hair is the standard for being a bum, i think most of the population is.”
“i want to cut it,” he announces.
“you should,” you say, pointing your spoon at him. “wanna know why? because if you mess up, no one will ever know. other than me, of course. but if you pay me enough i’ll let you forget it.”
he smiles at the joke for a moment before he leans forward and his face goes serious. “will you help me?”
“what? no way. i’ll mess up. and it’s only funny if you do it.”
he pouts. “please?”
you stir your soup around. “just watch some youtube videos. after three, you’re automatically a professional.”
“i want you.”
the statement has your neck snapping up from your bowl to him. the smug grin on his face lets you know that he was well aware of the double meaning behind his words. it was clear he was trying to fluster you enough to get a yes.
“you think you’re flirty enough to straight up brainwash me into doing stuff?”
“well, i wanted to say that to you anyway but... kind of?”
you feel a smile creep onto your lips at hearing the genuine tone in his voice. you down your last few spoonfuls of soup and quickly stand up. jeno looks up at you, eyes hopeful.
“finish your dinner. get the scissors. meet me in the bathroom.”
not even ten minutes later, jeno practically dances into the bathroom, a pair of red craft scissors in his hand. he sits on top of the toilet lid, figuring that’d be the easiest way for you to reach him. you walk in moments later.
“i’m pretty sure we’re not supposed to be using these types of scissors for hair,” he mumbles as he hands you the sharp utensil.
you twirl them in your hand. “oh, definitely not. do you want to wait then?”
he shakes his head, his shaggy bangs swaying with the movement.  
“alright, let’s get this going then.” you thread your hands through his thick locks to collect some of it in between two of your fingers. you bring the scissors forward and snip the small amount just to test the waters.
you slowly begin to get more comfortable and once you feel like you’re in your element, things begin to speed up. you move and cut faster but with efficiency. you do the spots on the back of his head and work your way forward. when it finally comes time to touch up his bangs, your small bathroom proves to be an inadequate spot to be doing this.
you end up standing balanced inches above jeno’s thighs that he’s pressed together tightly in an attempt to give you more room. you’re constantly readjusting your stance and when he notices, his hands go to your hips. you know he’s just trying to help you stay upright so you do a decent job but you still inhale sharply at the feeling of his hands on you.
not long after, you’re standing next to jeno as he inspects himself in the mirror. his fingers flick his newly shortened bangs around.
“not bad.” he tilts his head in a new angle and nods. “looks super good to me.”
you tuck the scissors into your back pocket with a relieved sigh. “oh thank god. i didn’t want to tell you before we started but i only watched two youtube tutorials on trimming hair.”
he runs a hand through his hair with a chuckle. “now that’s truly worthy of praise. and a tip.”
you raise a brow. “oh yeah? what’s th—“
he cuts you off by pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. he pulls back and drags his thumb over the skin that has come into contact with his lips. “thanks again.” with that, he leaves you standing in the bathroom, eyes wide and face warm.
   7.    he has six best friends.
“can i borrow your laptop?” asks jeno, from outside your door, nearly breathless.
you look up from your book. “uh yeah, sure.”
he rushes in your room and takes the item off of your dresser. “do you happen to have zoom on it?”
you shake your head and he groans. without another word, he disappears, running off into the living room. you hear his frustrated sighs as the minutes pass and he attempts to download the application. you finally decide to go check it out once it becomes too much to bear.
“it sounds like you’re in pain over here,” you comment.
he runs a hand through his hair. “i’m supposed to meet with my friends through a zoom call but it’s so complicated.”
you put a hand on your hip. “bet you five bucks i’ll be able to get it in five minutes.”
“are you kidding? i might be technologically challenged but i’m not stupid. i know you can do it fast, just help me out already, would you?”
“alright, grandpa.”
you type and click away at the screen, jeno watching you do so, entranced but equally as lost.
“well, i was wrong,” you say after a couple moments, leaning back in your chair.
“you couldn’t get it?” asks jeno, worriedly.
“no, it’s not that.” you click something on the screen and the app opens. “turns out i could do it in three.”
he rolls his eyes and shoos you out of the chair. he sits down and enters the code and password for the zoom meeting. it takes a minute, but he finally connects. you count six other people in the call. they all immediately cheer at seeing jeno and you hear them excitedly exclaim his name.
“hey guys,” he says, a smile already reaching his eyes. “it’s so good to see your faces.”
they all nod to agree. you get a good look at each one of them and realize they’re all boys. your eyes read over each of their display names.
mark me in ur heart
hyuckie~~~
moomin enthusiast
nananananana
chnele
lil huddy
“nice name, jeno,” ‘moomin enthusiast’ guy comments, snickering slightly. “glad to see you finally came to terms with it.”
‘jenojam’, his name reads. the rest of the group laughs, also teasing him about it. you assume it’s some kind of inside joke.
the self proclaimed ‘lil huddy’ furrows his eyebrows. “wait, did you choose that name yourself?”
jeno simply nods in response.
he glares into the camera. “donghyuck, you told me i had to put this as my name or else it wouldn’t let me connect!”
donghyuck—or ‘hyuckie~~~’, you presume—shrugs. “oops. guess i was wrong.”
you laugh at the humorous exchange. it seems like the sound has drawn some attention to you when ‘nananananana’ speaks up, eyes trained on you.
“um jeno? don’t you want to introduce your guest?”
jeno beams, dragging you closer into the frame. “i’m sure you all know about my roommate. say hi, y/n.” 
you do so, waving and smiling politely at the group.
“you know, even though we used to always hang at jeno’s, i don’t think we’ve ever actually seen your face,” ‘chnele’ says, tilting his head.
you agree. “me neither. i’ve mostly just heard you guys.”
the ‘mark me in your heart’ boy sheepishly rubs his neck. “sorry. we tend to be a little loud.”
‘chnele’ lets out a high pitched screech of a laugh. “only a little?”
“i recognize that laugh!” you blurt. “i would hear it all the time!”
”that’s our little dolphin,” coos ‘hyuckie~~~’.
“oh god, stop. i hate that stupid nickname.”
“it’s well deserved.”
“i think you should apologize to y/n for being a nightmare to her eardrums.”
“and ours, for that matter.”
“what about all your little freestyles? i’ve had to sit through hundreds of them and i never got an apology!”
“because they’re not bad! could you do any better?”
“you’re a soundcloud rapper, i think anyone could.”
jeno turns to you as the bickering on screen gets louder and louder. “this is gonna be a long call.”
once the group has moved on from roasting the life out of each other, you’re able to engage in some good-natured conversation. jeno teaches you the names and the other basics about the group. some points that stand out about the group is that mark is the oldest, renjun specializes in contemporary dance, jaemin inhales six cups of coffee on the daily, and chenle is insanely rich.
“what about jeno?” you ask them. “anything i should know about him?”
“he’s allergic to cats but the idiot still adopted—“
“she already knows about that, renjun,” jeno chuckles.
“oh. well. that’s pretty much the only interesting thing about him.”
jisung pipes up. “oh wait! he works out religiously too!”
you and jeno share a look. you burst into laughter and he simply glances away, slightly embarrassed. “oh yeah, i know that all too well.”
“and what about the unhealthy cooking obsession?”
you nod at mark’s question. “that too. he cooks dinner almost every night around here.”
renjun purses his lips. “he already cooks for you? wow. he must really like you.”
“you think?” jaemin asks. “didn’t you read any of the messages in the group chat? he’s practically in love with her. his words, not mi—“
“okay! i think it’s time for us to go! bye guys!” jeno doesn’t even give you a chance to say your own goodbye before he’s clicking the ‘end call’ button in the bottom right corner.
you give him a confused look. “what was that all about?”
“they’re crazy.” he laughs. “well, if you need me i’ll be in my room screaming into my pillow for the next couple hours.” he dashes off leaving you standing alone, trying to comprehend what had happened.
   8.    he‘s a great listener.
jeno has officially replaced seol as your movie buddy, not that you have a problem with it. you thought it was nice to have someone you could actually converse with but of course, you make sure seol still sits in.
“what i’m saying is that iron man just wants to protect his team.”
“well, if they sign the accords, they basically surrender themselves to the government.”
“and?”
“you don’t see a problem with that? see, captain america knows what he’s doing. he’s literally an avenger—“
“so is iron man!”
“let me finish! so, he’s an avenger, right? he has the best judgment because he’s saved the world countless times. he knows how to operate his team and do the right thing.”
“okay but there’s casualties. and that’s what iron man is trying to fix.”
“how do you save the world and not have casualties?”
“you just—“ your phone rings mid argument and you raise your finger towards jeno. “this isn’t over.” you put the phone to your ear, not bothering to check the caller id. “hello?”
“sweetheart?”
you feel a chill go up your spine. was it him? no, it couldn’t be. you had blocked his number shortly after you did so on all your social media.
“baby, don’t be so shy. i know you’re there.”
you can’t hold back. “please don’t call me that.”
he chuckles, breathlessly. “oh, c’mon. you used to love it. you still do.”
“no, i don’t. actually, i don’t want to hear your stupid pet names or stupid voice or see any of your stupid posts. just go bother your girlfriend and leave me alone.”
you notice jeno perk up beside you out of the corner of your eye. he must have been caught off guard by your irritated tone.
as always, lucas is unaffected by you. “i’m being nice and giving you a second chance. i even called you behind soyeon’s back.”
“is that something i’m supposed to reward you for?” you scoff. “congratulations, you’re now awful, toxic, and a cheater.”
he growls. the sound was familiar. in your relationship, if you heard it you knew he was going to snap at you until he had the satisfaction of making you cry. “i know you miss me so don’t say things you’re going to regret later. because even when you’re back in my arms, i won’t let you forget it.”
the thought of being back with him made you feel icky. but the fact that he sincerely thought you would crawl back to him set your entire body on fire. “are you joking? i was always aware of the fact that you treated me like the dirt you walked on but do you seriously think that lowly of me?”
you’re rendered speechless and apparently, so is he because the other line stays silent.
“i wouldn’t go back to you if you were the last person on earth,” you spit. “you treated me horribly, wong yukhei. i won’t ever forget it. move on. i have.”
you glance at jeno, his expression more serious than you’ve ever seen it. his eyebrows are furrowed and his eyes are trained on your cellphone. the glare he gives the device is so strong you wouldn’t be surprised if even lucas could feel it, wherever he was.
you hang up and block the number, wishing to never talk to him again. you toss your phone onto the sofa with an exasperated sigh. you find jeno’s gaze to still be focused intensely on it.  
“if you gave lucas that look, i’m pretty sure he’d cry.”
he breaks his concentration, eyes going to you instead. his entire face softens. “all i’m going to say is he better pray we never cross paths.”
“well, if you happen to, call me up. i wouldn’t mind helping you beat the crap out of him.”
jeno chuckles for a second then lowers his voice to a whisper. “he was really bad to you, huh?”
you nod. “he messed me up. i hate to admit it ‘cause i know i was stupid to stay with him for as long as i did.”
your roommate shakes his head. “don’t say that. it’s not your fault he messed up the best thing that would ever happen to him.”
“i thought i was the problem for so long, jeno. i was so blinded by love. then, i realized there was no way he truly cared for me when he treated me like i had no heart to be broken.”
jeno scoots towards you and rubs soothing circles into your arm. “you have such a big heart. and i can’t tell you how sorry i am that he took advantage of that. i’m sorry that you were stuck with someone so insecure and ignorant. please, don’t think about him anymore.”
you hold in your tears. you refused to cry over someone like lucas. “i know. i try so hard not to.”
jeno holds your head into his chest. his arms are placed securely on your back. “oh, baby.”
when jeno uses this pet name on you, it feels so completely different from lucas. you could tell me meant it. he wasn’t using it to make you stay a little longer, to assure you he loved you. strangely enough, you do not need to be convinced of that. you feel like you have known it for a long time.  
   9.    he likes to be the big spoon.
you’re not sure how he’s done it but you end up falling asleep in jeno’s arms. you assume it had been so long since you had been cradled and rocked so delicately that the foreign yet extremely delightful sensation knocked you right out. even seol is deep in sleep, laying down peacefully at your feet.  
you relish in the feeling of jeno pressed right into your back. he fits so perfectly against you that it reminds you of a puzzle piece. to be exact, the moment when you connect the last two pieces and the full picture becomes complete. that was how you felt—complete.
with jeno’s soft breaths tickling the back of your neck and his soft snores filling your ear, you know there’s nowhere else you’d rather be. his arm that is wrapped around you makes sure you can’t escape his embrace. you are positive that even if you had the liberty of doing so, you would stay exactly where you were.
you lean farther back into your pillow, closing your eyes. you let every thought fade away as you try to fall back asleep as soon as possible. you wanted the moment you found yourself in to last as long as possible.
   10.    he has feelings for you.
jeno mumbles sweet nothings into your ear as he toys with your hair.
it just seemed right to him. like something he was meant to do with you. he had seen these types of things in films and shows before. it was intimate and touching, the scenes were always meant to tug at the audience’s heart strings and show how in love the two characters were. perhaps, even though you lay asleep in his arms, he wants you to finally know.
“honestly, being inside with you all the time is kind of the best. i know the whole virus situation is less than ideal but being able to spend so much time with you... that’s all i could ask for.” he pauses. “isn’t it so crazy how before this we were all weird and awkward around each other? well, i guess we still kind of are. that’s mostly my fault so... sorry. i just don’t know how to act around you sometimes. we’re barely getting close and i’m already this attached to you. as jisung would so kindly say, ‘i’m simping’.” he chuckles to himself. “all jokes aside, i really do like you. ever since you moved in here all cute and nervous, you’ve taken your own little place in my heart, as cheesy as it sounds. and these past few weeks, you just keep on taking up more and more room in there. not that i have a problem with it. i just...” he stops as if he doesn’t know how else to express his feelings. “really, really like you.”
“thanks.”
you feel him jolt then abruptly stop stroking your hair. there’s silence until he asks, “you don’t happen to be a sleep talker, do you?”
you shake your head.
“and did you hear like, a lot of what i said?”
“only the important stuff. like how awkward you are and how much you like me.”
“o-oh.”
“but don’t worry. it’s mutual.”
you feel his relieved breath hit the skin of your neck. “that’s the best thing i’ve heard all day.”
you tilt your head back and stare at him, confused. “what, did you seriously think i wasn’t into you?”
he shrugs. “i was too busy simping, i guess.”
you can’t contain your laughter at the use of the slang. “park jisung would not be proud.”   
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leejenos · 10 months ago
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notnctu · a year ago
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through the lens ❀ l.jn
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❀ lee jeno x fem!reader ❀ genre - slow burn, smut/mature content, fluff (romance?), slight angst ❀ details - photographer!jeno, model!reader, college!au, shy!jeno but he aint shy in bed, strangers to fuckers!au ❀ word count - 8k (this is the longest thing ive ever written) ❀ warnings - nude modeling, swearing, oral (f/receiving), some sweet love makin’ ❀ brief synopsis - jeno asks you to model for his internship project, but little did you know, it was going to be a nude photo shoot.  
❝ jeno was too shy to hold eye contact, but he stared at you endlessly through the lens. ❞
❀ a/n - hihihi this is author doie❀ ! im bad at writing smut so pls dont hate me ah ha lol i tried my best i also dont model/do professional photography so really apologize if i butcher any terms lmaoo the only thing i am is that im in college and im shy
Jeno had applied to almost a hundred internships and almost close to none returned with an offer, even after a whole month of waiting. He absolutely needed to start building his portfolio before the beginning of his senior year of college. The embarrassment of possibly graduating without any experience loomed over the desperate boy. 
Photography had been more than a hobby to him, to the point where he wanted to take it seriously. His parents weren’t the most supportive of an Arts major, but that couldn’t stop him. Jeno saw the best through a camera lens. He had a special eye for beautiful moments and the impressing urge to capture it forever. 
It was too late to change his major, if he wanted to graduate with all of his friends. If he wanted to be successful, he had to act on it now. 
The swoosh! of a new email startled the sleeping boy. He stared at the brightly lit screen, reading the words over and over again to make sure it was real. Jeno was so enthralled with excitement that he scrambled out of bed to wake up his roommate, Jaemin.
He shook him so violently that the sheets fell from Jaemin’s warm body. “Dude! I got an internship!” He spoke with incredible glee, a wide smile couldn’t leave his face.
Jaemin groaned and had to hold Jeno by the shoulders to halt the boy from causing the room to spin. “Why--What is going on?” He dazely rubbed his tired eyes to blink at his giddy roommate.
The screen blinded Jaemin as it was shoved too closely to adjust. “Whoa--,” he pushed it away and shut his eyes, “--repeat what you just said one more time.” Jaemin held a finger up and Jeno grabbed it, jumping onto his best friend’s bed.
“I got an internship. Someone got back to me.” Jaemin returned the same excitement the moment he processed his words. He shot up in bed and hugged his friend tightly. 
“Wo-w, dude! Congratulations!” The two boys hurried on their feet to cheer together. There was no concern for the rest of their housemates, only celebration that roared throughout the entire night.
+
Truthfully, Jeno had no recollection of applying to this studio. It could have been a random link on a job scouting website, but he couldn’t be more grateful. An internship was long overdue and Jeno had been itching to get some recognition for his craft. 
“Hello, I’m Lee Jeno.” He bowed slightly at the receptionist, who had a stern stare that made him feel vulnerable. The first thing he noted about the office: white and minimalistic. 
Jeno’s specialty was landscape photography. His aesthetics consisted of black and white filters, city lights, dark mood lighting, and background commotion. He enjoyed capturing chaos the most, a scene where more than one thing was happening. The only reason being that there was more to look at. 
“Nice to meet you. The name is Lee Taemin, but you can call me what you please.” A young, lean man strolled his way towards Jeno with a wide grin and his hand for him to shake. Taemin was slightly shorter than him, but his stylish, expensive boots made up for his height. He had to be only a maximum of five years older than Jeno as Taemin appeared relatively youthful. 
Taemin’s firm grip pulled Jeno along inside the studio. A small gasp escaped from Jeno which earned robust laughter from the older man. “I hope you can break out of your shell soon. There is no room for timidness around here, Mister Lee.”
“Please, you can call me Jeno.” He smiled, quite awkwardly at the beautiful man. 
The tall glass windows, the concrete, gray floor, the white doors that lined the hallway, had to be all too predictable. Jeno envisioned this is what high class must look like. It was the pristine, bright feeling and the smell of vanilla that lingered distastefully. There was chatter behind the closed doors --- mainly directing, and high praises. 
The only off-put was that photographers worked behind closed doors. From the few studios he has visited previously, photographers often worked in open spaces due to lighting fractures or the ability to roam more freely. 
“I’m actually very ecstatic you signed up for the internship, since you do seem a bit on the younger side.” Taemin gestured toward the sofa in the middle of his massive office. Jeno sat across from him. Water was already placed on the glass coffee table that separated the two. A laptop was opened to face Taemin.
Jeno slyly rubbed the condensation from his palms on his jeans. Taemin’s stare bore deep into the shy boy, who had to break eye contact from time to time. “I know.” Jeno chuckled nervously, “thank you for getting back to me. I was really hoping to gain work experience through mentorship.” 
Taemin nodded at everything Jeno was saying. His face being completely expressionless. Jeno sipped his water to regain moisture in his dry throat. Taemin was more intimidating than he was anticipating. “Sounds great. Happy to have you here. It might be a small business, but the experience is worth investing in. Every photographer who has come in and out of my building has found their forte. Let’s say, it’s eye opening.” 
“That’s exactly what I was looking for actually.” As scared as he was of this mysterious man, he really enjoyed the comfort the environment radiated. 
Taemin leaned forward and squinted at the screen. “I noticed in the portfolio you sent that you don’t have any portraits or any people, in general, in your photos. Do you have any works with people? Since this is a studio of fine art nude photography.”
Nude. Jeno practically choked on the last remaining spit he gathered. Taemin acknowledged the boy’s shocked reaction and tilted his head curiously, “you did know that I specialize in contemporary fine art nude photography, right?” Unfortunately, Jeno did not. 
Jeno cleared his throat, “yes, of course. I wanted to challenge myself.” He had to lie, there was no other way to cover up his disbelief. This internship was the only hope left for him to gain something. Though, even the thought of shooting a naked body made him anxious.
He hated how timid he was. His friends and family say otherwise, mainly for the reason that Jeno automatically lit up behind a camera. In all honesty, he hid behind it. It was the only safe place that Jeno knew what he was doing. However when it came to real life situations without it, he lacked the confidence to be himself.
As ironic as it was, he hated being seen. He liked to be the background character in his own life, because the main character took too much of a toll. It could also be his deafening insecurities and lack of self esteem, but Jeno didn’t mind not being the center of attention.
“You like a challenge?” It was more of a statement rather than a question. Jeno caught a glimpse of the twinkle in Taemin’s dark eyes. “Then for your first task, I want you to show me that you can take on this role.”
Jeno scrambled for his phone to jot down notes. “Send me an emotional portfolio, model of your choice. They could be a friend of yours that you feel comfortable seeing naked. It must include a variation of headshots, full body, and body details. It must also be raw and unedited photos. I want to see if you have the eye for the art to capture these types of images.”
“When would you like it by?” He stammered, completely winded at the sudden project that unloaded on top of him. 
“Next Friday, and you’ll present it to me here in person. Feel free to use this studio if you don’t have a place of your own with equipment. All you need to do is book a room with the front desk. Any other questions?” The sound of the laptop shutting caused Jeno to look up at the brilliance in front of him. He needed Taemin to help him succeed. 
“Why do you take nude photography?” 
Taemin was unable to stop the laughter that erupted into the room. “I don’t run a pimp business or sell soft core porn, if that’s why you’re staring at me so funnily. What I make is an art masterpiece, it has nothing to do with physical features or desires. It’s the pure emotion that clothing distracts from. Clothing conforms the model into an aesthetic, and while that works for editorials, it won’t be a consistent thing here.” 
Jeno nodded understandingly. Overwhelmed and lost at words. He was unsure what he had gotten himself into. Where was he going to find a model on such short notice on such lewd conditions? He was really going to need to step out of his comfortable zone, in his photography and social skills. 
Taemin stood up and extended his hand once more. “I take pride in my art, so I hope you, too, start finding that in your own.” 
+
Jaemin held his stomach from the endless laughter, tears welling up in his eyes. “Nud-Nude photography? And you didn’t know?”
“Jaemin, keep it down.” Jeno whispered and cautiously peered around at the few people flooding into the small lecture hall. “I don’t want everyone in our club to misunderstand and think I’m some creep.”
His best friend straightened up in his seat and placed his hand on Jeno's slumped shoulder, “first of all, you’re a complete idiot for not researching. Secondly, it’s an art form. If you really got yourself a shady, rated R internship, I would’ve told you to drop it instantly.” 
His spirits were slightly lifted, but he was still struggling with who he should ask to model for him. As much as he’s already seen of Jaemin, being his roommate, he honestly would rather leave the rest to imagination. Jeno wasn’t purposefully searching the room for a candidate, but he could not stop his eyes from drifting.
He spotted the most attractive side profile that sat two rows below him. He shook his head to make sure he was seeing her correctly. Peering around, he looked for another possible face to shoot. But oh god, how she caught his eye every time she even slightly moved.
You smiled happily with your friends by your side as your club’s executive board members introduced this year’s goals and events to attend. It had to be the smallest amount of alcohol still running in your system that caused you to giggle every time guys tried to turn around and hit on you.
“Why don’t you focus on our club members instead?” You smirked at the smug older boy, who had poorly attempted to grab your attention. “I think this information is important to you. These events could help you develop your social skills to be much better.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, but your girl friends scoffed by your side.
He got up in disbelief and quickly walked out of the room. There was a brief pause at the sudden movement, but the announcement carried on per usual.
Jeno impatiently waited for the club meeting to finally be over, so he could talk to you. The longer it dragged, the more his confidence was subsiding. “I’m heading to study, wanna come with?” Jaemin poked at Jeno’s knee.
“Yeah, but you can go ahead first. I need to talk to someone.” His voice was shaky and his throat went so dry. Jeno’s shifty eyes scanned the room, hoping no one saw how nervous he was acting.
Jaemin’s eyebrows lifted suspiciously, “who? I didn’t even know you talked to anyone who came today. Donghyuck and Renjun aren’t here---”
“--her, Jaemin... her. I’m going to ask her to model for me.” Jeno motioned his head. His heart beating faster at seeing a small grin appear on your face from a comment someone made.
Jaemin hummed, “good luck with that, bud. I’ve got two shoulders for you to cry on after.” The extra hint of sarcasm only made Jeno sweat nervously. He was seriously doubting his decision, but it wouldn’t be a challenge if he didn’t do it. He knew he’d regret it more if he didn’t just ask you. 
Once the meeting was dismissed, you wanted to get out of the room before the heavy rush into the hallways. Unfortunately, a few frat guys pulled you into their conversation and chatted up a storm. Your friends played into their foolery, but you stopped paying attention when they asked for your numbers.
There was a faint tap on your shoulder and you turned to see who the culprit was. You didn’t seem to know him, because you would’ve remembered such a demeanor. His eyes were glued to the floor behind you and his shaky hands ran through his brown locks. His shyness was quite endearing, yet alarming since you weren’t sure why exactly he had approached you.
“Yes?” You asked curiously.
The moment Jeno heard your delicate cadence, he melted like a popsicle left out in the sun. He peered up, but quickly reverted his eyes to the white tiles when he noticed how beautifully you stared at him.
He counted his breathing to calm his rapid heart beat. He cleared his throat to introduce himself, “I’m Jeno. I’m a third year Arts major, um-- I was just--- I know we don’t know each other. I wanted to ask, uh-” Jeno was horrified at how he stammered over his own words. His cheeks burned with a red glow, and if he couldn’t look you in the eye before, he definitely couldn’t now.
“Hey, see you later.” One of the bulky frat guys called and you waved back weakly. 
A guy who had been chasing you endlessly scoffed at the pitiful sight and smirked at you, “see you at my house tonight? Been missing you in my bed lately.”
“Thought you would’ve guessed the reason why I stopped coming around.” Jeno heard the sting in your remarks and the disbelief in the male. 
You honestly could have left, Jeno knew that. But you stayed and waited patiently for him to finish. Jeno could tell how strong you were just by your intimidating aura that practically suffocated him by standing in close proximity to you.
You sighed and reached to grab your jacket on the folded seat, “look, Jeno. It’s nice to meet you and all, but I gotta get going.” 
Shockingly, the shy boy reached out to stop you by your fingertips. His touch lingered before he dropped your hand quickly. “I’m sorry. Are you free this Monday?”
“Uh, that depends. If you’re asking me on a date, then I’m busy.” Rolling your eyes, you weren’t sure why you still stayed to listen to what this random stranger had to say. If it were anyone else, you would’ve walked away the moment he asked if you were free. However, you acknowledged his timidness and the courage he must have mustered up to approach you.
Jeno shook his head violently, completely in shambles from that type of misunderstanding. “Not a date. I need someone to model for my portfolio photos that my internship assigned. It’s actually very important to me because it’s the first internship that responded back to me when I had applied to so many a whole month ago. Basically, I really need this and you because I think you’d be perfect to take pictures of. Oh-- wow! That sounded very bad --- uh --- what I meant is that your facial proportions are perfect and---”
“I’m free Monday.” You cut off his endless ramble and gestured toward his phone. He handed it to you without any hesitation and you typed in your number. “Text me the time, place and what I should wear.” 
“Oh actually, it’s a nude photoshoot.” Your eyes doubled in size, completely offended by that statement.
Jeno felt the sudden shift in the air and brought his hands up to block himself, “to be more clear, it’s a contemporary fine art nude photography studio. The pictures are pieces of art and to be seen as that only. I have no intentions or ulterior motive to sleep with you, see you naked or sell, leak your nudes for the profit of your body. But, I understand if you no longer want to do it because it sounds super strange now that I am explaining it.” 
Your shoulders relaxed and the fist that formed unraveled. You exhaled deeply, “I’ll do it. We can talk more about it on Monday and I get to leave on my own accord if I don’t feel comfortable. We work on my conditions.” Picking up Jeno’s chin, he was absolutely petrified at the forced eye contact and your incredible, powerful gaze. He was mesmerized by the fire in your eyes, and if he stared any longer, he could’ve lost himself in them. 
“Of course.” With that, you dropped his face and left without another look back. Jeno looked down at his phone and the new contact name, (Y/N). It had slipped his mind to even ask what your name was and he slapped his face in utter stupidity. “Do better, Lee Jeno.” It was a remainder to himself to, hopefully, be better the next time you two speak.
+
Monday, 3:03 PM. 
Jeno paced back and forth in the brightly, lit white room. He was trying to find any blinds or curtains to cover the tall windows of the high rise building. It should not be too much of a problem, the extra lighting was a positive. Jeno was only worried for your comfort of the openness. 
There was a soft knock before Jeno practically tripped to open the door. His breath hitched at the sight of your bare face. This time, you were the vulnerable one. Jeno only saw purity, yet impressed at how your tired eyes still managed to bid him a soft smile. He admired your uneven complexion, and the sparse moles that dotted your skin. 
“Okay, so you want to see me naked now or later?” Filled with jokes, your voice was light and airy this afternoon. There was a bit of a contrast from the first time you two met. Softer, enchanting, almost ghostly. 
Everything in the room was white. The mattress on the floor had a white comforter and white sheets. The backdrop. The walls. The hardwood floor. The only color was the blue sky that the tall windows let in.
“Here’s a robe. You can change in the bathroom.” Jeno scratched the back of his neck and his eyes wandered everywhere, but your’s. 
“Would you be okay with me just taking off my clothes in here?” You saw the light tint of pink cover his face, and spread to his ears. You examined more of the shy boy’s embarrassed face, finally getting a really good look at him. Jeno was very attractive, and you could only imagine how beautiful he must look if he fully faced you.
Jeno fiddled with his camera strap, “only if you are okay with that.” Clearing his throat, he stood next to the window to give you some privacy. “I’ll go over what I plan on doing. I’m going to take photos of your face details, parts of your body, full body, and portraits. You can lay down on the bed and I’ll direct you in poses. Have you modeled before?”
He was scanning the bustling city below his feet. Cars zoomed quickly and crowds of tiny people flooded the streets. He brought his camera up to his face, not being able to resist the urge to capture such a thrilling sight. 
“If Instagram counts, then yeah. Professional model gig would be a no. Nude photography is a definite no, unless we are talking about being filmed during sex.” Jeno chuckled, while also holding the camera steady and stealing a few moments to keep for himself.
For a strange reason, being naked for a non-sensual reason felt even more vulnerable. Laying on the soft fabric, you felt oddly exposed and slightly more reserved. You’ve had countless strangers see you naked. Men were sexually desiring to see a sexy picture. You were always lusted after, but this feeling of nakedness was special.
“Are you ready?” Jeno gulped, finally setting the camera down. 
You hummed cheerfully. Your heart was leaping out of your chest as the boy shifted slowly to face you. As he turned, you noticed he had his eyes sealed shut, which caused a small laugh to erupt. “Jeno, you have my permission to open your eyes and to look at me.”
Holy shit, he was trembling with an inexplicable fear. The camera was slipping from his sweaty hands. His mouth was as dry as the desert. Jeno’s pounding heart was loud in his ears. 
Jeno has seen his past girlfriends laying naked in bed, but this situation was too different. When he saw you laying there in absolutely nothing, he was overwhelmed, yet astounded at how graceful you appeared.
There was no exchange of words and no exchange of eye contact. He towered over your lying figure and shakily brought the camera to his eyes. He selfishly wanted to capture your elegance. Through the lens, he saw all of you: the curve in your eyelid, your curled eyelashes, the small mole next to your soft lips, the sharp color of your eyes, the way your hair frames your face.
This was the most beautiful sight he’s ever seen. You were comparable to the arts found in popular museums. Your body lines were enticing and an impressive shape. Your breasts pooled on your chest, the round nude nipple in the centers. Your details had to be sculpted by gods, who took their sweet time making you. You were a true masterpiece. 
Confused, Jeno felt a huge mixture of emotions. Was he aroused? Was he infatuated? Did he just fall in love with a complete stranger? He recognized the same thrilled feelings he felt taking landscape photos. With each click, he grew more excited with how beautiful the photos were turning out.
“Sit up and rest your chin on your left hand. Lean your weight on your right leg.” Jeno’s direction was clear and firm. There was no evidence of a smaller tone he usually spoke in. Sitting up, you placed your elbow on your upper thigh to steady your chin. Jeno had already gotten down to floor level to you. 
Without the camera that separated you two, it had to be the first time he faced you completely in such close proximity. There was so much to admire about Jeno. He remained concentrated on his craft, but it was actually very sexy to see his dedication. It was almost like he was a whole new person, like all the shyness drifted away. 
Jeno couldn’t take his eyes off of you. It wasn’t simply your beauty that amazed him. Your confidence made everything easy. There was something about your blank stares, when he asked for an emotion, you portrayed it perfectly.
“Can we talk while you shoot?” Your sudden voice startled the photographer. He lowered his camera and his gaze automatically wandered off behind you, which didn’t go unnoticed. He nodded after a short pause and the shutter noises continued.
“Why did you choose me as your model?” 
Jeno peeled away from the device, “because you’re you.” He didn’t even know what that statement meant. It wasn’t like he knew you before the first time he asked you to model for him.
The corners of your lips dipped down, drawing an evident frown. Click. Jeno loved that image especially. It was a simple way to get real, authentic facial expressions. He marveled at the photo, but registered the reason behind it. “I wanted to ask you the second I saw you. I just knew that I wanted you.” 
“But you don’t know me.” 
Jeno looked through the lens once again, welcoming a full view of your stunning attributes. He spoke in a low voice, “then, let me know you.” Click. 
It would be the biggest lie to say that you weren’t aroused by Jeno at the moment. He was cool, without trying to be. He really did shine when he had a camera to work with, like a star to a dark night. While he had a distinct demeanor off the bat, you enjoyed unraveling the rest of him. He was, also, the first man you met that didn’t seem sexually driven by a naked woman in his presence. 
You had to resist every urge to push the camera away and share the few seconds of his entire gaze before it wandered away. You wanted to rock his world, he was so innocent and beautiful. You wished to wreak havoc on him, have him show you how much he wanted you. 
+
You anticipated an awkward photoshoot, but Jeno made you feel safe and comfortable. He made sure to adjust the temperature when goosebumps rose on your arms and when your nipples became painfully hard. He never touched you or came too much into your personal space. He always asked for your permission. 
Nude modeling was a new experience for you, but you were surprised at how much you liked it. or how much you liked Jeno taking your photos. He sat next to you on the bed when you put on your articles of clothing and panned through several shots to satisfy your curiosity.
Leaning close, your head ducked to see the photos. A gasp escaped your lips when you saw just the first few. “Is that really me?” The pictures made you feel an abundance of emotions, you felt what they reflected. Sadness, melancholy, happiness, confidence. You didn’t know images had that much power to make you feel that, especially photos of you.
Jeno nodded, smiling so wide that his eyes turned to moon crescents. He was so in love with the results. He found respect for Taemin’s craft and he was right, he might’ve found a new forte to experiment with. “I can send you the photos digitally too, if you want them.”
“Maybe I’ll print them out, frame them, and gift it to every horrid man who has tried to flirt their way to my body since they want to see it so fucking bad.” 
Jeno peered over and saw the tiny glimpse of pain in your orbs, “why would you give horrible people what they want?”
“So they can finally shut up and leave me alone. Plus, this is art and if I tell them it’s actually me, maybe it’ll change their minds to start treating me like it.” 
He held his palm up and almost immediately, your fingers filled the spaces between his. “I’m going to need you to start treating yourself as fine art.”
“Keep taking more photos of me and I just might start thinking I’m Mona Lisa.” Your laughters blended nicely into each other. There was mutual mental acknowledgement of the happiness you were both feeling.
Jeno never let go of your hand, and there was a short moment of comforting silence where you two sat in each other’s existence. You were the one to break it, “are you doing anything after this?” 
He shook his head. “Well then, you’re mine for the rest of the night. We’re going to pretend we’ve been close friends since first year and eat take-out on my bed because that’s what I need at the moment.” 
+
“I know you respect my body and see this as an art form, but I’m genuinely surprised that you didn’t feel aroused at the slightest.”
Jeno didn’t even realize how much time had already passed being you. You two ate and chatted as if you’ve known each other forever, as if the friendship wasn’t established several hours ago. It felt safe and right, like you two belonged in each other’s existence and nowhere else mattered.
He felt warm inside from your hearty laughter and courage, like he was watching a painting come to life or a photo in movement. You were smitten over how endearing and complex he was. He was more than what meets the eye and that alone drew you towards him.
“Okay, I’ll admit,” Jeno paused to watch your reaction, “in the most respectable way, I was somewhat turned on. But! Before you trail blaze me for being just like every disgusting male in your life, I genuinely didn’t have any sexual thoughts during the photoshoot. That was all professional and it will continue to be like that.” 
Getting up from your bed, your mind was working at lightspeed to process his confession. Jeno was fast to pick up someone’s personality, what stood out and what was kept hidden. He knew quicker than anyone else that you were not someone to offend because you were a strong, straight forward woman.
His personality breakdown went like this: you knew what you like, you knew you were going to get what you want, you enjoyed flirty banter (with people of your choice), you weren’t afraid to be blunt, or kick someone’s ass. You carried yourself with confidence that graced your every step, which makes anyone attracted to you instantly. Bold, confident, sexy had to be what came to mind whenever he thought about you. 
Nonetheless, he really liked you as a person. He could pat himself on the back all day long for just approaching you, but he knew the real reason as to how this all happened. It was you saying yes to a stranger’s odd photoshoot. You made him the luckiest man in the world. 
“Continue? Are you looking for excuses to keep seeing me?” You smirked and Jeno’s voice grew small. 
“I--- uh, well,” there goes the nervous stammering, “I know the conditions were a one time thing, so I understand if you don’t want to do it again.” As the night had progressed, Jeno gradually began to hold eye contact and actually looked at you directly without the help of seeing you through a lens. This was the first time he broke it. 
“Hey now, I’m messing with you, Jeno.” He had been sitting on your floor, at the end of your bed. You crawled on your elbows to reach him, and to hold his chin to face you again. Deja vu. “I’d love to get naked for you again, and again, and.. as many times as you want me to.” 
He stared at you with his mouth hung open in disbelief. His eyes scanned your beautiful face to see your lips pull back into a mischievous smile. Gulping, he swallowed every ounce of courage he had left. “You don’t have to say it like that.” He tried to remove your grip, but it latched onto his hand. 
“You’re finally looking me in the eye, sweet thing. I don’t think you realize how much I had been wanting that from you.” You caressed his cheek, rubbing small circles on his texture. 
“What else do you want from me?” His implication sounded suggestive, even if his curiosity was innocent. 
Your hot breath brushed against Jeno’s lips. “I can show you.”
Jeno, the one and only college guy who has seen your naked body in a non-sexual context. Jeno, the shy, sweet boy who appreciated and recognized you as a form of art. Jeno, the talented and skillful photographer, who consistently made sure you felt comfortable. Jeno, the only person in the world who you’d model nude for. Jeno, the dazzling character behind the camera who you wanted more than anyone else you’ve ever met. Lee Jeno.
He seemed like he was inching closer, already tilting his head to fit your’s. You smiled to yourself, seeing that your words were received well. Diving in, your lips swam together fervently. 
The poor boy found himself lost in your enchanting, alluring gaze. He let the trance consume him, selfishly kissing the art he admired so dearly. A small part of him felt the guilt and confusion that began to rise. He wasn’t sure why he suddenly wished to feel your lips on his neck, or run his hands across your hot skin. He swore these thoughts were not present earlier. 
A small pop! and Jeno held your shoulder to pull away. “I’m sorry, did I do something?” You asked, honestly concerned that you were taking more than you deserved. The least you desired was to hurt Jeno, who had been nothing but nice and sweet.
“(Y/N),” you could listen to your name roll off his tongue all day, “I feel somewhat guilty. I don’t want things to be misunderstood.”
“Which would be?”
“I don’t want you to think I coerced you into being my model just because I had intentions to sleep with you.” Jeno was already gathering his things, but you hopped off your bed and placed a hand on his chest. “Because that’s what it’s starting to look like at the moment.”
“Was that something you did though? Did you have those intentions?” Your stare bore right through him. The warmth of your hand relaxed his racing heart.
“Never, (Y/N), I would never do that to someone.” Your hand traveled down to grab his belongings and tossed it back onto the ground. 
He silently watched as you took off your pants, and stood in front of him in your underwear. “Then, we’re fine. I know your intentions have always been pure. But truthfully, Jeno, seeing you focused while you worked sparked something in me. You don’t understand how aroused I got and how badly I wanted you to fuck me on that bed.” His hand trailed up your exposed thighs, finally touching your softness. “You’re the one guy I wanted first, and it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that.” 
“I-- I don’t know what to say.” His cheeks revealed how embarrassed he was, but his dark, lustful eyes were telling a different story.
A smirk fell upon your face, “then don’t say anything.” 
Jeno devoured you, inhaling the light hint of vanilla that still lingered. He hoisted you onto your mattress and kissed you like his life depended on it. His antsy hands roamed your free range, exploring, holding, gripping the parts he marveled over. Small moans from the back of your throat encouraged him to continue.
No one has ever kissed you with the amount of passion Jeno did. It was gentle, with enough vigor to cause your panties to dampen. It wasn’t sloppy, where previous guys had a problem of missing your mouth entirely and slobbered your chin. 
His lips worshiped you, highlighting your good sides. Flashes of the photoshoot popped into Jeno’s head as he left purple marks on the places he loved capturing the most. He pushed up your shirt, exposing your chest to him again. His tongue circled around your hard nipple as he made sure to give the same amount of attention to each one. 
Jeno knew he was too shy to hold your intense stare, but getting to know you during and after the photoshoot, he could see the softness in your gaze. He was, now, able to see all of you. The sight of you through the camera was addicting enough, so finally taking you all in was more than satisfying. 
Your hands ran through his hair as he kissed down your torso. His thumbs hooked the waistband of your underwear, and peeled it off your body. You gasped as the cold air from your apartment grazed against your exposed figure.
Jeno paused to admire your glistening pussy, “would it be okay if you let me make love to you?”
Your heart burned, not out of embarrassment, but at how he still managed to ask you for your permission in the sweetest way. You rested your weight on your elbows, “no one has done that before, would it actually make me want to fall in love with you?”
“It wouldn’t be too bad. I have a lot of love to give and you look like a person who deserves all of it anyways.” Jeno’s finger ran over your wet slit and rubbed your clit slowly.
Your moans filled the room as the electric jolted throughout your veins. The wetness grew, seeping out of you like a waterfall. Jeno dropped down to his knees, and lifted your legs on his broad shoulders.
“Are you usually this wet, baby?”
Chuckling, you smiled at his bold choice in using pet names, “Just for you.”
He hummed, chiming at how he liked your answer. Spreading you open, his tongue met with your swollen bud that begged for his licks.
His tongue darted side to side, up and down and in result, your back arched in pleasure and a darkness clouded your mind. His name and mindless profanities streamlined their way out of you as Jeno ate you out in such a precisely delicious way.
Grabbing a fist full of hair, you pulled him closer, even if there was no more space to fill. Looking down, you two exchanged glances before he thrusted a finger into you. Your hips bucked harder as he eased in another one.
Jeno curled his fingers in search of your sweet spot and found it when a deep moan escaped your throat. His fingertips rubbed and pressed into your plush flesh, causing you to practically scream and squirm in his mouth. 
He suckled your clit and fingered you simultaneously and quickly. The pleasure was overflowing and you released his hair to grip your sheets below you. Your legs shook and trembled as he had no caution to stop.
“Please, I’m going to--” you could barely talk due to your face contouring to the splurge of pleasure every single time Jeno rubbed your spot. “--to explode.” 
He had to take back what he thought earlier in the day. This was the most beautiful sight he’s ever laid eyes on. The whole scene played like from one of his favorite films. It felt like he was giving his photos life. Your body twisted and turned, accentuating the curves of your lines. 
Jeno had become painfully hard against the fabric of his jeans, but seeing you fall apart because of his minimal movements exhilarated him. “P-Please, don’t stop.” A breathy moan followed suit and your thighs tried to press themselves together. Jeno didn’t allow it, his free hand hooked underneath your left thigh to pull one side away from his cheeks.
Your high gradually grew so tall that it all eventually came cascading down. Your legs shook violently and sat up from the euphoria that took over you. Jeno prolonged your buzz and you screamed loudly, having to bite down on your fingers to stop yourself from angering your neighbors.
Jeno drank you up, letting your wetness cover his chin and drip down his knuckles. He pulled away, at last, and you took deep breaths to control your heavy breathing. It was like Jeno knocked the wind completely out of you. 
He stood up and you saw the outline of his hard bulge straining itself through his jeans. The next scene was quite animalistic. You, still embodying your high, sat on your knees and unzipped his pants with your needy hands.
“Now, it’s your turn to get nude for me.” You whispered, tauntingly. Jeno groaned when you reached down and gently pulled him out. He stepped out of his clothing, all of it. His shirt was lost in the corner and his bottoms were scattered over your floor. Mirroring his actions, you took off your last piece of cloth.
Jeno was built. Though his biceps did not go unnoticed during the photoshoot, you were surprised at the lines of muscle that sketched his body. It made your mouth water, seeing his extremely hard dick stand against his toned abs. His red tip fell just below his navel. Jeno only kept getting better as the night continued on.
Pulling him closer, his hand found their way to the back of your head as you aligned your mouth to the wetness that spilled from his tip. “I want to make you feel good.” Jeno’s hoarse voice made your knees weak.
Peering up, you batted your eyelashes at him fondly. “Just a little taste?” You begged, having to hold his shaft with both of your hands because of his thickness. Your tongue was already stuck out, your hot breath causing the tiniest bit of sensation for him.
He nodded and his eyes were trained on you. He didn’t want to miss any second of your kitty licks. You flattened your tongue against his warmth, dragging it up to the top. The saltiness hit your palette as you swirled around his redness. “Oh--” Jeno threw his head back and bit his lip, “--lay on the bed now.” 
You smiled sweetly and gave his member a quick kiss before reaching for a condom in your drawer. Jeno climbed onto your bed and situated the rubber comfortably. You laid on your back and he was fast to pull your legs around his waist. 
He lined himself at your entrance and eased his tip in slowly. Squirming, you craved him to fill you up to the brim. He leaned down to kiss you, letting your tongue lap with his. It’s your hands with the mind of their own when they flew automatically to hold his face whenever you wanted to deepen the kiss. Then, Jeno stretched himself all the way in and he caught your gasp with his lips. He groaned, feeling the mess he created merely minutes ago. 
His hips moved so easily with your wetness, but he went slow. Dragging out each pull and then, pushing himself back in roughly. “Jeno!” Your body jolted up the bed each time. His body fell over yours to hold you intimately, letting you bury your face into his neck. Your lips latched themselves onto his sensitive skin, painting a purple sunset. 
Jeno’s arms snaked underneath your thighs as he pressed them to your chest, folding you almost into a ball. Your mouth hung open as he fucked you harder, rougher, deeper yet keeping the tempo rhythmically slow. At this point, you could feel his hits in your gut. Your weak hands gripped loosely around his strong wrists that held your legs down. “You’re pussy is so tight and holy shit---, you keep getting more beautiful.”
A familiar burning sensation set in your chest as you saw how concentrated his face had become. You were so fucked out that you could barely speak, “you—” his hips mercilessly slammed into you powerfully, enacting a low moan every time he reached your sweet spot. “—keep surprising me.” His actions came to a halt and he stared deeply into your soul. 
You whined, wiggling your hips for any friction. He held them down into the mattress, knowing his grip was strong enough to leave a mark. “I told you, I was going to make love to you tonight.”
“I’ve already fallen for you.” You said breathlessly, tracing the side of his face and pecking his lips softly. 
“You don’t understand what you’re doing to me by saying those things.” He whispered and pushed his entire shaft to fill you to your brim. 
You yelped his name and gripped his shoulders, but he wasn’t done yet. “Show me how badly you wanted me the first time you saw me.” Jeno blinked at you in slight shock. 
As he continued to hold the deep gaze, he kept pushing his dick further and further into you. He was balls deep, almost impossible to keep going. He fucked you without the need to pull out, just burying his cock deeper into your wet pussy. You exclaimed, moaned, cussed at every push. Holding the stare was more than enough to lose yourself all over him again. 
Jeno was drunk with the image of your fucked out expression and every time the mixture of pleasure and pressure caused your eyebrows to crease and mouth to open release sensual sound. He had been trying his best not to come undone, to fixate another climax for you.
The feeling of you wrapping tighter and tighter around him drove him insane. “Give it to me, please.” Your muffled plead called for his release, but he could feel that you were close to your second.
Jeno sat up on his knees and pulled you into his arms where your thighs fell over his. You groaned at the empty feeling, though it was quickly replaced with a gratifying moan when he inserted himself again. Your arms dangled around his neck, foreheads touching intimately. 
The fucking eye contact again, how could you get enough of it? You giggled, amused at how different Jeno was when he eventually opened up. He wrapped his strong arms around your back and thrusted his hips up into you. The way this man made you squirm, scream, and shake were nothing you’ve experienced before. 
He smirked, placing a gentle kiss on your cheek when he went rampage on your pussy. “Not laughing now, are you?”
You whined in pleasure, brushing your fallen strands of hair out of his face. “Shut up before I make you.” 
“Then I’d rather keep going.” Kissing up his jawline, you lead your way to his pout. His kisses intoxicated you with his passion and madness, like the most intense part of a symphony, or when the bass drops after a long build up in a song. 
Jeno sped up, ramming up into your slick pussy over and over again. He even brought your hips down to match him, guiding you down as he went up. The headboard was knocked against the wall, your windows steamed up, cries of pleasure from the both of you created the ambiance, the smell of sex filled your lungs. Jeno reached between your bodies to furiously rub your clit to where it felt almost raw. It all sent you into the clouds, the familiar queasiness settled in your lower half.
Your eyes rolled back and your back arched, having to pull away from the desirous kiss with Jeno. “I’m cumming!” You announced before the tension unraveled, causing you to see absolute white. The second wave was much more uncontrollable, Jeno felt you squeezing radically around his dick as he tried to fuck you faster to prolong the feeling.
Your legs shook around his and your upper body went limp with pleasure. You reached the peak of the mountain and it came crumbling down underneath your toes. It was catastrophically enthralling, to the point where you physically felt something leave your body.
“Oh shit..” Jeno stopped his motions at the sight of you squirting over his lap. He pampered your torso with fluttering kisses, hoping to calm your spastic body. “...baby, are you okay?” He asked with a bit of concern of how lack of life you seemed. 
This man just gave you the best climax in your whole life and he asked if you were okay? Regaining your senses, you sighed a small yes to reassure him that he didn’t actually murder you. Hopping off, you pulled the condom that restricted him.
He hissed when you cupped his balls in your palm. “Cum, my sweet thing.” You purred and Jeno’s hand pumped his member aggressively. You leaned in to help, sucking the tip and flicking your tongue over his slit. 
His other hand gripped your neck, causing you to drip on your sheets. Jeno was panting and with every tug, it became louder. He seemed so desperate to release that it made you smile to be the reason behind it. “Can you lay down,” A grunt followed his question, “please.” He huffed.
“Because you asked nicely.” Smirking, your back hit the sheets and you opened your legs to give Jeno a view. He situated himself above your stomach, as he fucked his tight grip.
“I’m cumming---” He couldn’t look any more amazing. With a final moan, the white streaks streamed out in short sequences. It landed across your abdomen, over your nipple, and pooled around your belly button. 
Bringing himself back to reality, Jeno stepped back to marvel you, his masterpiece. The white streaks coated your purple skin and your chest rose fast to catch your reality. Gazing upon your naked body, he was utterly infatuated with all of you. He was so in love with the sight of you that not a single photo could capture the beauty that you were. 
Jeno pondered the thought of how merely a day changed a small part of him. You were life changing, addicting, an incomparable character that he felt like he’s known forever, and now, couldn’t live without. It was the taste of your juices on his lips, your sweet melodic music that was your voice, your daring smile that enticed him to never peel away from you. It was simply you. 
He leaned down to rub his knuckles against your cheek, planting a lovingly peck on your forehead. “I’ll go start the water for you.” 
+
Jeno anticipated the reaction of his mentor. He found himself at the same scene he was when he was first given the task. Taemin sat across from him, hunched forward to analyze his new set of photos on his laptop. Raw, unedited photos of you, your body, your details. 
The hum of the air conditioning droned on, driving him mad. Jeno needed one reaction, but Taemin had been silent and expressionless for the past ten minutes. Whenever he did move, it was to click through to the next picture. 
Suddenly, he shut it closed and stood right up. Jeno, panicked, did the same. Taemin stuck his hand out and Jeno hesitantly grabbed it, incredibly unsettled and unable to read the older man.
Taemin received it firmly, giving Jeno a good handshake. “Welcome abroad, Lee Jeno. I expect even more great things from you.” 
Jeno registered his delightful mood switch and he was fast to follow up, “my photos, --- you --- like them?” 
Taemin nodded generously, patting Jeno on his shoulder. Taemin reached up to tap his own eyelids. “What you can see, is very special, kid. You’re an artist and I’m here to recognize that for you. It seems to me, you can do more than take pictures of sidewalks.” 
Jeno smiled happily, his eyes disappearing from joy. He couldn’t wait to tell you about it. 
The rest of the week, leading up to Jeno’s appointment, had felt nothing short of blissful moments together. You and Jeno spent almost every waking minute together without the cost of your friends’ time. He walked you to your classes, some even being across the campus from his own. You accompanied him for meals, even sitting in his lectures to just be with him.
There were no words that established what you two had become to each other. Jeno wasn’t looking for that anyways, in fact, he somewhat liked the ambiguity. If only he could tell you how making love to you made him begin to actually fall for you.
You were never one to hold a serious relationship, but you found a small want for that festering in Jeno. It was hard to admit to yourself, but Jeno saw you for all that you were. He truly saw you, whether it had been through a lens or through his own eyes. He captured your rawness and you were able to find vulnerability around him. 
He ran to you, where you sat in the lobby waiting for him to finish his meeting. Peering up from your phone, you noticed the beaming smile on the boy’s face. You couldn’t hold back your own grin, seeing him apparent with so much joy. “I’m guessing good things?”
“I got it, (Y/N)!” He jumped into your arms and you laughed at the sudden affection. “He loved my photos.” 
“I didn’t doubt it for one second. You’re an artist, Jeno. You create masterpieces that make even someone like me, feel like art.” 
Jeno hugged you closer to his chest, giving you a tiny squeeze. Pulling away to face you, his eyes examined your outstanding grace. You knew what he was already going to say, but simply wanted to hear him say it. “That’s because you are art.”
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luvdsc · 5 months ago
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pussy blocked.
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Y/N’s unofficial guide on how to be a heartbreaker:
1. have fun. 2. never stay the night. 3. always be the first one to leave. 4. never hook up with the same person twice. 5. don’t fall in love with boys like lee jeno.
pairing :: lee jeno x reader genre :: angst, comedy, fluff ⋮ fuckboy/girl + college au word count :: 31,360 words warnings :: y/n has a breakdown at one point, dick jokes, sexual innuendos, implied sex but it’s like a romcom movie where we skip to the morning after because i don’t write about places where the sun doesn’t shine, and of course it’s not a luvdsc fic without a whole bunch of mutual pining playlist :: break my heart (hey violet) ⋆ lowkey (niki) ⋆ pancakes (lany) ⋆ i left a party for you (pilar victoria) ⋆ blurry (jp saxe) ⋆ slow (shy martin) ⋆ we’re fucked, it’s fine (jeremy zucker) ⋆ happiness (taylor swift) ⋆ this is how you fall in love (jeremy zucker & chelsea cutler) + extended playlist here. author’s note :: this is me putting my biggest fears on blast :’) ty to ti @m88n, steph @aqiaquas, tk god @eggyukhei, and lana @choerrypuffs for being my biggest cheerleaders !!! and especially to @wincore​ thank you for listening to all my incoherent ramblings and ideas and accepting it all within an hour of us starting to talk LOL ily moon ♡
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i. the devil wears leather jackets.
“Thoughts on leather jackets?”
Yeeun hoists herself onto the scratched counter of the tiny bathroom, cheap neon strips of flashing lights pasted around the edges of the ceiling and the booming bass of the music barely muffled by the closed door. She swings her legs, the heels of her boots banging lightly against the cabinet beneath her.
“They’re cute. Why? Don’t you already have like, three of them?” Your fingers curl around the lip gloss your best friend offers to you. You thank her before you lean forward, uncapping the makeup and spreading an even, glossy coat over your lips.
“Not on me!” She taps her manicured fingers against her thigh rhythmically. “Actually, maybe on me. There’s a really good sale going on at Madewell right now. Maybe I’ll get one.”
“Another night of drunk retail therapy?” You pucker your lips, angling your face slightly to check that you had applied enough of the shimmery gloss. You quickly adjust the satin white crop top you have on that makes your boobs look phenomenal. Perfect. It’s the first party of your final year at university, and you would very much like to start it off with a bang and leave with a cute guy tonight.
“Sober me will thank me tomorrow.” She waves her hand dismissively before taking back the gloss from you and shoving it unceremoniously into her bra (because one hand holding a purse means one less hand holding a drink) before pushing herself off from her counter perch. “Anyway, you’re missing the point! What do you think of boys in leather jackets?”
You narrow your eyes at her, scrutinizing her fidgeting figure through the mirror. “Alright, spill it. Who’s this about?”
“I overheard Mark telling Yukhei that Jeno was asking about you.”
You temporarily pause in place, horror flashbacks already playing like a montage at the mention of him, before facing your friend, who’s already looking at you expectantly. “Did he say why?”
“Who knows? He started throwing up on Yukhei’s shoes, so I had to move away from the target zone.”
You wince at that. Poor Mark was always a lightweight and yet, he always accepts whatever drink Donghyuck hands him. And the latter always mixes concoctions with cheap vodka making up at least 40% of the contents.
“Isn’t this exciting though? The Lee Jeno is interested in you,” she squeals, grabbing onto your arm excitedly.
“I’ve been there. Freshman year, two minutes and beard burn. Literally, the worst experience of my life. Zero out of ten, no stars on Yelp, would swipe left on Tinder, maybe even report him to save other people from the horror.”
“Okay, some points were made, but he must’ve gotten better, right? It’s been like three years. Unless he paid all those girls to talk about his dick game.” She taps her finger against her chin, pondering thoughtfully. “You know, I feel like that’s what Jaemin does. Like he seriously can’t be that great, but I hear a different girl gush about him in every class.”
“No, I can confirm. Jaemin’s a sweetheart. He gave me a water bottle and Advil on the way out. He even made me breakfast before I left. Honestly, I would hook up with him again just for those blueberry pancakes.” You turn and twist the doorknob open. “Anyway, it’s a big house. I doubt I’ll run into hi—”
Speak of the devil and he shall appear in all his leather clad, silver necklace and rings, low dipping shirt, and black ripped skinny jeans glory.
Lee Jeno: the walking cliché of every teenage girl’s wildest dreams and every mother’s nightmare. He’s living, breathing proof that bad boys who wear the typical leather jacket and drive a sleek car with one hand on the steering wheel, but also have a hidden soft side (because you caught him smuggling a stray cat into his dorm once during sophomore year) actually exist. It’s Lee Jeno with a different girl wrapped around his finger every night or morning or even sometimes mid-afternoon; Lee Jeno with his pretty eye smile that can make anyone swoon; Lee Jeno with his classic fuckboy tendencies that you cannot understand for the life of you why so many girls, and even some boys, fall for so willingly.
Or for you, Lee Jeno: the boy who was your first and absolute worst hookup way back in freshman year. It’s more like a burning, fiery meteor crash landing than a pleasant stroll down memory lane when you think of him. He’s the reason you desperately wished you listened to Jennie when she told you to find an older, more experienced boy to have your first college hookup with, and not a fellow lowly freshman. In your defense, upperclassmen were big and scary, and Jeno—the cute boy from one of your classes who was showing you pictures of his three cats back home and profusely sweating away in his leather jacket because he wanted to look cool at his first frat party—seemed relatively harmless that night.
You were sorely mistaken. Literally. That memory still gives you PTSD. You had the stache rash, beard burn, whatever you want to call it, to prove it. To put it lightly, it felt like razor burns in the most unpleasant intimate places because a certain someone didn’t think having stubble (which he was weirdly proud of) would make a difference. It sure as hell made all the difference because those two minutes were the most miserable two minutes of your entire twenty-two years of life. Not even the seven Jell-o shots you had before that could help.
Even worse, he didn’t even make you see stars, not even a single damn measly one, but for once, you were thanking the gods for the short timing that night. He certainly made quite the impression in only 240 seconds. And to top it off, he didn’t even call you after that night.
So yeah, you aren’t really a fan of the guy. No matter how stupidly attractive he still is. Especially when he dons his stupid leather jacket. The one he let you borrow that same night after he spilled jungle juice on you. And the very same one he’s wearing right now.
“Y/N.” Jeno cocks his head to the side, the corners of his lips quirking up into an all too familiar smirk. “I was just looking for you.”
“I didn’t know we were playing hide and seek, but congrats, you found me.” You start to brush past him, motioning for Yeeun to help you make a quick getaway.
“Wait, can we talk?” His hand reaches out to circle your wrist, and you stop.
“About what?” You say flatly, shaking his arm away, and from the corner of your eye, you can see Yeeun quietly creeping away. She gives you a thumbs up and a wink as you desperately try to signal for her to come back, but to no avail.
“How’s Hyunjin?” he asks abruptly, and you raise an eyebrow at him before shrugging. “Who knows? We broke up two months ago.”
“Oh, really? My condolences.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “At least try to sound a little more sincere than that. Why are you asking anyway? What do you want, Jeno?”
“Let’s fuck.”
If you were taking a sip of one of Donghyuck’s cursed drinks right now, you would have accidentally spat it out right in his face. And then tossed the rest of it onto him on purpose.
“Wow, is this how you get all the girls into your bed? Real charming,” you say, sarcasm dripping off of every word. It’s a wonder how your panties didn’t just magically drop with such a romantic offer.
“You asked what I wanted,” He replies, trailing behind you closely as you weave through the dancing bodies and make your way to the kitchen. Lord knows you’re gonna need a drink if he insists on continuing this conversation. “So that’s one of my points. The other point might need a few minutes, depending on your answer.”
“Your dick is rated e for everyone, and I wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole.”
“That’s okay, you can use your mouth instead. I’m not picky.”
“Oh my god.” You nearly choke at that, and Jeno has a massive grin on his face, looking like the cat that ate the canary. You immediately proceed to give him a different type of bird, and he laughs.
“You're hot, I’m hot, we’re both single, and I know you aren’t batshit crazy, so why not?”
“How do you know I’m not crazy?”
“You never mass publicized our uh, you know…”
“The razor burn fiasco?” You stop at the drinks counter, crossing your arms over your chest, and he grimaces, throwing his hands up in defense.
“Okay, was it really that bad? I didn’t think it was.”
“Take a cheese grater and drag your dick across it, and then you can get back to me on that question. And you only lasted two minutes. You should probably report that to the Guinness world record people.”
“That was freshman year, and I’ve gotten tons of practice now.” He flippantly dismisses your previous statement and gives you a cocky smile, rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek.
“With who? Your hand?” You scoff, grabbing an empty red cup that looks relatively clean before pouring a little vodka and some orange juice into it. You take a sip of it cautiously, wrinkling your nose at the aftertaste. Yeah, that cup wasn’t clean at all, and you’re hit with the gross taste of cheap beer.
Jeno notices and grabs the cup from you, rummaging through the fridge to pull out a couple Jell-O shots and handing them to you. He downs your discarded drink as you eye the jiggly alcohol skeptically.
“You like those, right? I remember you had a bunch of them back then.” He shrugs, and you feel oddly touched that he would actually remember your drink preference. Of course, it’s not like the options were that vast at a college party. It’s either beer, vodka, a mix of it all, or Jell-o. But still.
Oh god, you can’t believe this is what your inner monologue is saying. Are you really swooning over a guy who knows what drink you like? The bar for men has really been set too low. The bar may not be your son, but you desperately need to raise it. Plus, you definitely weren’t going to tell him the only reason you kept taking those shots on that fateful night was because you were nervous and he was cute.
“Yeah, I like them, thanks,” you mutter before swirling your finger around the edges of the disposable container and tossing the contents into your mouth. You throw the empty plastic into the nearest trash bag tied to one of the cupboard handles.
“So I heard you were looking for me,” you start as you prepare another Jell-O shot. “And I highly doubt it’s just because you want to fuck. So why?”
“Just thought it’d be fun. For old times’ sake, right?”
“Bullshit. Everyone knows you and Jaemin have that messed up body count competition going on. You do know that you have to sleep with someone new to increase that, right?” You maneuver yourself around to the other side of the counter to take a handful of chips.
“Yes, I am well aware, thank you.” His eyes follow you as he leans against the counter, fishing out from the large plastic bowl one of the individually wrapped chocolate candies Jaemin impulsively bought at the Target sale.
“What’s the real reason, Jeno?” You stare at him, cocking your head to the side. “You can’t possibly tell me it’s because I gave you the best blow job you ever had because eighteen year old me definitely wasn’t that good at it yet.”
He laughs at that, teeth flashing as his lips pull into a genuine smile for once, and you have to hide your own. God, this is why girls get hung over cute boys, isn’t it? Light travels faster than the speed of sound, and you’re getting sucked into how pretty his smile is until he opens his mouth and ruins it all.
“Fine. Real reason, honest to god. You’re the only one who got a shit experience. My track record is perfect, except for you, and it bothers me.”
“So you’re saying your ego is so massive that you can’t jack off properly unless you know you rocked every girl’s world?” You wrinkle your nose, an expression of disbelief written all over your face.
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“Oh my god, you’re such an asshole.”
“Hey, I’m an honest asshole. I’m not stringing along anyone or pretending to be interested just to get into someone’s pants. They all know it’s just a one night deal, and they’re fine with it. Or more than fine actually.” He winks at you, and you fake gag.
“You’re telling me that all those girls were satisfied?”
“Hey, babe,” he calls out to a pretty girl dancing near the doorway to the living room. She turns to face the two of you, and eyes slightly widening, you recognize her as Sei from your Sustainable Operation Management class. You always thought she was a little more on the uptight side, but apparently not. “How was your experience with me? Scale of one to ten.”
“Oh, ten,” she says immediately before turning to you. “Jeno does this amazing move with his tongue where he—”
“Okay, thank you, I will never be drunk enough to hear about your sexcapades in detail.” You take a vodka shot, hoping its effects will hit you fast soon.
“Thanks, babe.” He winks at her, and she nods, blowing him a kiss before tipsily swaying out the door again. He faces you again with a cocky expression. “Wanna hear a review from someone else with personal experience?”
“No. And ‘babe’? Really?”
“You don’t have to remember their name if you call them all the same thing,” he says nonchalantly, pouring himself another cup of beer, and you frown at him, a nasty look of disgust emerging on your face.
“If that’s supposed to make me want to sleep with you, you’re way off, babe.”
“That doesn’t work because I know you know my name, Y/N.”
Scoffing, you start your walk towards the living room in search of Yeeun. She has the car keys, and you’re ready to go back to your shared apartment and crash. Plus, the carton of Ben and Jerry’s in your freezer back home is really calling your name right about now.
Jeno follows behind you closely, and when you suddenly pause and turn to face him, you catch him off guard. He bumps into you, and the contents of his solo cup sloshes onto the front of your shirt.
“Shit, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that,” he panics, putting the cup down somewhere before frantically looking around for napkins or towels, literally anything to wipe it off, but comes up empty handed.
Fan-freaking-tastic. This feels exactly like how your first night with him started, but this time, you’re going to have to take your shirt off for the wrong reason.
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ii. hey send pussy pics (read at 2:32 a.m.)
The two of you end up back in square one, standing in the same cramped bathroom once more as Jeno insists on wetting some paper towels for you and helping you clean up the alcohol soaked shirt that was unpleasantly sticking against your skin.
“Didn't you pour your drink on me last time, too?” You peel off your shirt, balling it up and running it under the faucet. “You know, if you wanted me to take off my clothes, you didn’t have to go this far.”
His eyes grow wide as he splutters, “I didn’t do it on purpose! I’m sorry! I swear, it was an accident—!”
“Relax, I’m just joking.” You grin at him, feeling a little endeared at his response (Perhaps, it reminds you of freshman Jeno. You miss that cat loving dude. Too bad he’s after a different kind of cat now). He lets out an audible sigh of relief, and you laugh. “Can you hold this? I wanna wipe off the rest that’s on my skin. It’s kinda feeling gross and sticky.”
“Why does this vaguely sound like a conversation we had before?” He hands you the paper towels and grabs your shirt, beginning to scrub out the stain. You can’t stop the laughter from bubbling up in your throat again as you try to clean yourself up as best as possible.
“So do you still pick up girls by showing them pictures of Bongsik, Seol, and Nal?”
Jeno pauses, shifting to look over at you, and says softly, “You remember their names?”
“You can’t expect me to not know their names after looking at pics of them for over an hour,” you answer, huffing slightly when you see that the beer stained one of the front pockets of your jeans. You’re going to have to see if you can borrow Tzuyu’s Tide pen tomorrow and scrub it out. There’s no way you’re going to walk to the laundromat tomorrow morning and spend $2.25 in quarters just to wash a single pair of pants. Even if it’s your favorite pair that makes your butt look like a million bucks.
“How are they doing anyway? Does Bongsik still bully Nal?”
“Yes,” he snorts, holding up your soaked shirt after wringing it out. You reach for the hair dryer in the bottom cabinet and plug it in before directing the hot air towards the wet fabric. “She acts like she hates him, but my mom sent me pictures of them napping together in front of the window.”
“I remember you promised me you’d send me pics of them, but you never did,” you mention, pouting slightly. “I was really looking forward to those.”
“I mean, I was going to, but…” He trails off, shaking his head slightly. “Sorry, I guess I must’ve forgotten.”
“Yeah, like you forgot to call me the next day,” you mutter offhandedly. If Jeno had heard your remark over the loud whirring of the hair dryer, he certainly didn’t say anything about it. The two of you stand there quietly, conversation coming to an awkward standstill at that.
“I think this is the best it’s gonna get,” he says awkwardly ten minutes later after the dryer gives out a few last dying splutters. Your shirt still looks somewhat damp, but you suppose he’s right, judging by the way the blow dryer seems to be taking its last dying breath.
“Yeah, I guess so,” you sigh, staring at your shirt. Wearing a white top doesn’t seem like such a good idea anymore, seeing how your bright red bra would be completely visible underneath the fabric, almost glowing like how anything white stands out under a black light. “I think I’m just gonna head ho—”
The banging on the door cuts you off, and you and Jeno nearly jump at the sudden noise. You reach over and open the door, and Mark nearly topples over on you.
“Sorry, I just needed to take a pis—Y/N?” His eyes grow round when he sees his friend behind you. “Holy shit, were you two—?”
“No!” you shout, shaking your head vehemently until Mark’s eyes darts towards your shirt in Jeno’s hand and then to your shirtless torso. You immediately cross your arms over your chest, and Jeno takes a step forward to cover your figure.
Mark’s cheeks grow red at an alarmingly fast pace, and he stumbles back, averting his eyes to the ceiling. “Fuck, I’m so sorry! I didn’t see anything!”
“No, wait—”
The sound of Mark blindly grabbing for the door and slamming it shut interrupts you, and you’re left standing there, cheeks growing warmer by the second and mouth opening and closing like a fish.
“Oh my god, now he thinks we’re hooking up, and he’s gonna tell everyone,” you wail, wringing your hands. Jeno awkwardly hands you your shirt, and you put it on dejectedly.
“I don’t think he’ll tell anyone,” Jeno halfheartedly attempts to reassure you, but your glare shuts him down quickly. Even he knows that’s a lie.
“Mark is a blabbermouth, and he’s drunk. That’s the worst Mark combination you can possibly have.”
“We can just do it, so it’s true.”
“Can you think with your head up there, instead of the one down there for once?” You snap before rubbing your temples. “Plus, I have standards and a reputation to uphold, you know. The Iota Theta girls would kill me.”
“Hey, I’m a real catch.”
“Yeah, I’m not trying to catch the clap here.”
“For your information, I’m clean,” Jeno scowls at you, shoving his hands into his pockets, “We all know what safe sex is. This isn’t high school.”
“Thank god, having more of you running around sounds like my worst nightmare.”
Jeno starts to protest, but your phone goes off with a loud ping! in your back pocket, and you pull it out. You must have forgotten to change it to silent mode earlier. A text from Yeeun only dampens your mood even more than your shirt does because apparently, she’s gone back to some guy named Yugyeom’s place. Now, you’re all for your best friend getting some, but she seems to have forgotten that her bra holds the keys to the car amongst other things, leaving you stranded out here in the Nu Chi Theta house (Also, Yugyeom is certainly in for a surprise when the bra comes off).
“Yeeun took off with some dude, and she has the car keys,” you sigh, pulling up the car service app. “I’m gonna get an Uber and call it a night.”
Jeno grabs your hand before you can tap to accept a ride. “Wait, are you gonna Uber alone?”
“No, Casper the friendly ghost is gonna do a rideshare with me, too.” You shrug off his hand, and he groans in frustration, carding his fingers through his hair.
“No, I’m being serious. You can’t get in an Uber alone in a wet shirt at 2 in the morning. The driver could be a creep, and that just isn’t safe at all.”
He’s right, you realize, suddenly hyperaware of how exposed you are in your state of dress and how stupid you would’ve been to do that. All those years of watching Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, and you had learned absolutely nothing. Olivia Benson would be shaking her head at you right now. You can already hear the funky mystery music theme song playing.
“Okay, then what do you want me to do? Walk home? My other friends are all probably wasted by now.”
“I’ll drive you back.”
“What? No, I can’t let you do that.” You shake your head stubbornly. “I’ll just go and see if I can find Chaeyoung or Yeji and we can walk back together.”
“Pretty sure I saw them both go upstairs with some of my frat bros like thirty minutes ago.” You stay silent at that, and he sighs, exasperated. “Can you just accept my help? Either you can get in my car and I’ll drive you back or you can walk and I’ll look like a creep slowly driving next to you the entire time, but I’m not letting you go back alone because I don’t want to see your face on the 9 o’clock news. I bet you’re gonna come back from the grave and cockblock me for the rest of my life.”
“First off, don’t be so full of yourself. I wouldn’t spend my time watching you bore another girl to death. I’m not into that. Secondly, If I show up on the news, make sure they pick a good picture of me. Preferably one of the cute pics on my insta from Capri,” you inform him, and he makes a noise of disbelief before a hint of a smile breaks through.
“You're unbelievable, you know that? C’mon, I’m driving you back. ” He shakes his head, pulling his car keys from his pocket. You start to open your mouth, and he beats you to it. “And yes, I only had that one drink you made earlier, so it’s safe.”
You close your mouth, slumping your shoulders as you follow behind him. He glances over his shoulder, throwing out casually, “Anyway, I think they should use the picture of you in that French art museum.”
“You mean the Louvre? Wait, have you been stalking me on insta?”
“I mean we follow each other, but sure.” He pushes his way through the crowded living room, and you stick closely behind him, trying to not get jostled too much by the drunken horde of other college students attempting to forget about their C’s on midterms and get laid tonight instead.
“That pic is from two years ago, and you only started following me a couple months ago!”
“Wow, now look at who’s keeping track.”
You let out a huff at that, but have no other response, pursing your lips slightly. When you finally reach the front door and step outside, the breeze that blows by sends shivers up your spine, the freezing weather being exponentially worse with the state of your shirt amping up the coldness. You wrap your arms around yourself, goosebumps forming on your skin as you try to create warmth from friction, rubbing your hands on your arms to no avail.
Suddenly, the welcomed feeling of warmth spreads across you like wildfire, and your eyes widen when you realize that Jeno had wordlessly draped his jacket over your figure before continuing the trek to his car. Hurrying after him, you shove your hands through the sleeves, your fingertips barely peeking out from the ends of it. The jacket envelops you warmly, and you tug the front of it closed to keep your body heat in. Faint traces of Jeno’s cologne clings to it, and you find yourself not minding it at all, pleasantly surprised by the woodsy, but slight citrusy, musky scent.
“Thanks,” you mumble when Jeno pulls open the passenger door for you, and you get in, making yourself comfortable, silently impressed by the neat and clean interior. There’s a cute polaroid of his three cats tucked in the driver’s sun visor. He shuts the door and makes his way to the driver’s side, sliding into the seat and starting the car up. You enter your address into Google maps, waiting for it to finish calculating the route.
The drive is quiet, save for the mellow music Jeno plays on his phone through the aux cord. The lack of conversation is such a stark contrast to before, but you don’t know exactly what to say. You glance over at him, studying his features clad in the passing streetlights.
Jeno is, without a doubt, handsome with his bright eyes framed by the longest lashes that you really wished you had yourself (it’s so unfair how boys always seem to have the prettiest eyelashes), pretty smile that causes those very same eyes to form moon crescents, and obviously, killer body. But most of all, the confidence he practically exudes is a stark contrast to when you had met him all those years ago.
“Enjoying the view?” he says casually, and you roll your eyes, turning your gaze to the road in front of you as he laughs.
“I’m just trying to figure out how you managed to get all those girls in bed.” You fiddle with the zipper of his jacket absentmindedly, and he glanced over at you.
“I asked them nicely.”
You snort. “Oh, really? And it worked?”
“I think my record speaks for itself.”
You sneer at that, but say no more. He taps his fingers against his thigh, while his other hand firmly holds onto the steering wheel. You briefly wonder why that move is found to be universally attractive, especially if the guy puts his hand on your thigh. Maybe all girls’ brains were hardwired to think that way.
Your phone announces that you have arrived at your destination, and you unbuckle your seatbelt, getting out of the car and turning to say thanks, before hesitating to close the car door when you realize Jeno’s leather jacket is still draped around your figure. Your hand hovers over the door handle before you pull back and start to take off the outerwear.
“Keep it,” Jeno says, noticing your dilemma. “Wouldn’t want you catching hypothermia. You can just give it back to me some other time.”
“The apartment building’s door is right there. I’m not gonna catch a cold after being out here for ten seconds,” you reason, starting to slide off one sleeve.
“Yeah, but this gives me an excuse to see you again.”
You freeze, face warming up at the unexpected answer. Your mind nearly short circuits, and you are at a loss of words for the first time tonight, mouth popping open in surprise. Jeno looks rather satisfied at your reaction, and he reaches over to shut the passenger door and then rolls down the window with a grin.
“So I’ll see you tomorrow with my jacket, yeah? I’ll text you my address.”
“W-wait, do you even have my number?” you manage to stammer out at last, and his smile widens even more.
“You gave it to me already, didn’t you?” Your eyes widen slightly, and he laughs, “You should go inside now. It’s cold.”
Speechless, all you can do is numbly wave at him before running towards the apartment complex’s entrance. When you make it inside the building, you turn to see Jeno still waiting out there. He waves at you before driving away. Cheeks growing warm, you turn away and make your way to your apartment.
Later, before you finally go to bed, you notice the barrage of notifications you received, specifically three texts from an unknown number.
[ 4:23 a.m. ] xxx-423-2508: 727 Maisie Street, Apartment #22
[ 4:24 a.m. ] xxx-423-2508: {image.jpeg}
[ 4:24 a.m. ] xxx-423-2508: bongsik, seol, and nal say good night :)
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iii. return of the pancakes™
After your 8 a.m. Linux Analysis and Design class, you drop by Jeno’s apartment, the borrowed leather jacket folded over your arm. You vaguely remember coming here during your sophomore year spring semester at the end of the whole Greek row carnival fundraiser week, but for a different boy entirely.
You knock on the door, shifting from one foot to the other as you wait for someone to answer. It finally opens, and Jaemin is looking at you with a wide grin on his face (honestly, it’s a little unsettling how perfect his smile is).
“Hello, Y/N, fancy seeing you here,” he greets you, leaning the door frame, spatula in hand and a flowery “Kiss The Cook” apron tied around his waist (it was a joke gift from Jisung, who doesn’t find it so funny anymore after Jaemin keeps demanding kisses every time he wears it within his vicinity).
“Uh, hi, Jaemin, I just wanted to return Jeno’s jacket.” You lift up your hand to show off the outerwear as if to emphasize your point. “I’ll just… leave this here with you, and can you give it back to him?”
“Woah, woah, what’s the rush? You should come in and give it to him yourself.” Jaemin wriggles his eyebrows at you, and you’re a little taken aback. How does this dude have this much energy to flirt or do whatever the hell he’s doing at 9:45 in the morning? You’re not even fully awake until after lunch and your daily gym session with Soyeon later.
“Uh, you know what, it might be easier if I just drop it off and leave.” You try to hand it off and back away all at the same time.
“I’m making pancakes,” Jaemin says suddenly before gesturing towards the kitchen. “Do you want some?”
“Ah, no, I really should… God damn it, yeah, I really do want some,” you answer, defeated, as you trudge into their apartment, following Jaemin inside. You raise an eyebrow when you see Jaemin essentially twirl his way back into the kitchen area.
“Great! So do you want chocolate chips, blueberries, or plain?” He asks, turning up his kilowatt smile to an even brighter notch. He putters around the stove, flipping the current pancake smoothly and onto the plate. If you weren’t so sleep deprived, that move might have made you a little turned on. Guys who cook are honestly so attractive. No, wait, correction: guys who cook well are hot (Sorry, Mark).
“Chocolate chip, please.” You sit at their tiny kitchen table, crossing your legs and resting your chin on the palm of your hand. “So where's the girl?”
Jaemin chuckles, eyes sparkling, as he pours some batter into the pan and tosses on some chocolate chips. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Please, we all know you make pancakes in the morning after a one night stand. I even have firsthand experience.”
“I make them whenever a girl’s here in the morning. And there’s one here right now.” He winks at you, placing a perfect chocolate chip pancake in front of you. “Maple syrup is on the counter, and butter and whipped cream are in the fridge.”
You grab all the toppings from their respective places and bring them back to the table. “Did Jeno tell you I was stopping by?”
“Of course he did,” Jaemin snorts, rotating the pan to evenly spread out the batter. “Jeno tells me everything.”
You spread the butter evenly across the pancake before drizzling on some syrup. Cutting up a piece, you spear it with your fork and almost moan out loud when you take the first bite. “So is this about—holy crap, this is so good—the body count thing? I tried to explain to him that he can’t count it twice if he fucks the same person again.”
“What? No, this isn’t about—Okay, let’s just say this. Jeno is an emotionally constipated asshole, but he’s still a good asshole.” Jaemin slides the spatula under the pancake, flipping it over neatly before shaking the pan lightly.
“A good asshole, wha—Wait, what does this have to do with anything?” You furrow your eyebrows, confused, as you take another bite of the pancake. “What are you even talking about?”
“He’s…” He sighs, leaning the spatula against an empty plate before he runs his hand through his hair frustratedly. “At this point, he only knows how to speak fratboy, so it’s confusing and he’s a little dumb sometimes, but he actually l—”
“Who the hell are you talking t—Oh. Y/N. Hi.” Jeno emerges from his room, eyes widening when he realizes you’re sitting at the kitchen table, happily eating the second pancake Jaemin just made for you.
“Hey.” You wave at him before motioning towards the jacket you draped over the couch. “I brought your jacket back. And then Jaemin lured me in with his pancakes—-and before you say it, I’m not talking about his ass.”
Jeno snorts loudly as Jaemin lets out a noise of offense, previous conversation now forgotten. “You come into my home where I’m making you free pancakes, and you have the audacity to insult my ass. My ass is beautiful and shapely and perfect.”
“Yeah, okay, Jaemin. If I ever need a flat surface to write on, I’ll be sure to call you.” You munch on the rest of your pancake, ignoring the sounds of indignation coming from the aforementioned boy. “Anyway, nice boxers, Jeno.”
The feline patterned boxers with the words “PUSSY MAGNET” painted right across the crotch area has you struggling to keep a straight face, and Jeno suddenly feels very exposed, even though everyone in the room has already seen him naked before. He throws his hands up to cover his bare chest and then his lower region, struggling and wishing that he slept with a shirt and sweatpants on for once.
Cheeks quickly turning a brilliant shade of red, Jeno silently curses Renjun for buying these boxers for him during last year’s Secret Santa exchange as a joke. It’s not his fault he was down to his last pair of clean underwear, and this was all that’s left. At least he didn’t decide to sleep in his birthday suit as usual. Actually, now that he thinks about it, that might’ve been the better option.
“I’m gonna… go put on some clothes,” he mutters, quickly retreating back into his room, and you stifle a laugh before focusing your attention back to the chocolate-y goodness in front of you. Na Jaemin truly is a god in the kitchen (and the bedroom, but you would never admit that out loud to his smug, handsome face).
Jaemin’s eyes dart between you and his best friend, the gears quickly turning in his head. It suddenly makes sense why Jeno asked him to make pancakes this morning.
“Y/N,” Jaemin calls out, and you look up at him, tilting your head to the side slightly. He hesitates for a moment. “Just… don’t be too mean to him please.”
Your eyebrows bunch together in confusion. “What are you talking about?”
“Nevermind, it’s nothing.” He shakes his head, pouring out some more batter and sprinkling on the chocolate chips. “Another pancake?”
“Yes!”
He slides another one onto your plate, and your eyes shine at the sight of it. You excitedly add a pat of butter before pouring the syrup and piling on a ton of whipped cream. Wriggling in your seat excitedly, you slice off a bite sized piece. You smile happily at him, and he falters slightly.
“Thank you, Jaemin.”
Seeing the way your eyes light up, Jaemin understands why Jeno likes you so much and is willing to set himself up for heartbreak for a second time with you.
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iv. studying is an abbreviation for ‘student dying’.
“So how’s it going with Jeno?”
You freeze in your seat, stopping midway in calculating the present and future values of stocks. You should’ve known that when Yeeun calls for an emergency study session and books a private room in the library, it would turn into an interrogation time. She even buttered you up beforehand by buying you a passion fruit iced tea lemonade with sweetener and a freshly baked bear claw from the cafe on the first floor. Your best friend in question looks expectantly at you for your answer, while Giselle looks equally as shocked as you.
“You’re dating Jeno?” Your other friend asks incredulously, “Why didn’t you tell me?! Juyeon asked me if you were single, and I said yes.”
“We’re not dating! Yeeun is making a big deal out of nothing,” you protest, resuming your studies as you jot down the final answer in your notebook.
“She’s up at 3 a.m. texting him,” Yeeun spills, looking directly at Giselle and ignoring the indignant look you throw her way. “And she hasn’t booty called Moonbin in the past three weeks.”
“No.” Giselle’s eyes grow round, and she immediately turns to you, abandoning her assignment entirely at this point. “Didn’t you say Moonbin was the best? He’s a dancer, he’s literally so flexible, and I bet he can literally hold you up the entire time, like have you seen his arms? Like oh my god, he’s so hot.”
Yeeun is nodding furiously in agreement, and you fidget in your seat, biting your bottom lip. “I just haven’t had time, and Jeno just texts me cat pictures. It’s no big deal. I’ve been so busy with all the senior projects in all my classes. I have one due soon, and we have to dissect Boeing’s management plans and write up some proposals, but Minho still hasn’t done his part, and the rest of the group are freaking out about it.”
“That’s why you need a little destressing session,” Giselle chimes in before leaning forward and saying in a quieter, teasing voice, “I heard Minho’s a really fun one, too. Maybe you can ask him to come over and work on the project.”
“God, no, I wish, but Hyunjin’s in the same frat and super close with him,” you groan, thinking back to your ex. “Not that I care too much about it, but it just gets way too messy if you sleep with your ex’s friends, y’know? But I can hook up either one of you with him if you want.”
“I can’t. I’m kinda seeing someone,” Yeeun confesses, and you and Giselle immediately whip your heads towards your friend, eyes nearly popping out of their sockets.
“What? Who? Spill,” you demand, and Giselle nods vigorously in agreement. Yeeun turns pinker, a shy smile appearing on her face as she fiddles with her pen. “Yugyeom and I have been texting more, and we’re planning on getting dinner together later.”
“No way, the dude from the Theta party? You’re still talking to him?”
“I know, I know.” She waves her hand at you. “I thought the same, too, but we actually ended up talking afterwards, and it was nice, so we exchanged numbers, and well, we’re going on an actual dinner date.”
“God, does this mean I’m the only one who’s single now?” Giselle whines, frowning as she turns her attention back to her homework and writes down the next problem a little too hard with her pencil.
“Hey, I’m not dating anyone either,” you say, but the two girls give you a deadpanned look. “I’m not! Jeno and I are just friends. And you already know Hyunjin and I broke up before summer break.”
You also slept with him again a week before the school year started, but that doesn’t count. Hey, you managed to score his old flatscreen for the apartment, and he even helped you carry it up and install it, so Yeeun definitely can’t judge you too hard for it because she’s the one who binges the most dramas out of the two of you (She still occasionally likes to remind you of how you basically fucked him for a tv though). Granted, he might have given it to you under the impression that you would continue to go out with him, but it’s not your fault his mind jumped to those conclusions.
“Right. Friends who slept together before and still have the hots for each other. And go over to each other’s apartment at seven in the morning. You never willingly wake up early for anything.” Yeeun raises an eyebrow at you.
“Okay, first off, I only go over early when Jeno texts me that Jaemin has a girl over because that means he makes pancakes the next morning. Those pancakes are amazing. And secondly, Jaemin has girls over almost every night.” You inform her, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Okay, I can also vouch for the pancakes being good, but they aren’t worth losing an extra hour of sleep everyday. Maybe once a week at most,” Giselle counters, and you scowl at her. She’s really throwing you under the bus here. You’ll remember this the next time she needs your help getting out of a Yeeun-terrogation.
“Weren’t you going out with Chan though?” Yeeun directs her question to Giselle, who scrunches her nose in distaste.
“Don’t remind me, that was a complete disaster.” She rolls her eyes, flicking through her notebook. “He had a complete meltdown in Whole Foods after he told me he loved me two months into our relationship and I wouldn’t say it back. A literal grown man throwing a tantrum in the produce section— it was so embarrassing.”
“Oh my god, he did that? What did you do?” You and Yeeun are absolutely horrified, and you barely manage to get the question out.
“I left as fast as possible. Thank god I was the one who drove us there,” she sighs, shaking her head before slumping back in her seat. “You know what’s worse? I should’ve seen the red flag when he wanted me to call him ‘Dino’ in bed. Like not to judge, but I’m not about to fuck a dude who’s into prehistoric animal play or whatever.”
“God, that’s so terrible, I’m so sorry,” you say at last when you finally get over the shock of this entire train wreck, and Yeeun nods sympathetically. “I can hook you up with some good guys or girls if you want.”
“Mm, I’m not up for anything serious, but just a fun dude for a few times would be nice,” she hums, finishing up another calculus problem and jotting down the next equation. “I’m torn between doing a tinder marathon or calling up Changbin.”
“Wasn’t he the dude who brought you flowers after you hooked up with him in the dorm bathroom?”
“And the common area couch,” she admits guiltily, and your head shoots up so fast at the confession.
“That was you?”
During your freshman year, the RA called an emergency floor meeting because security cameras caught a couple going at it in the common room, specifically on the couch. Luckily for the couple, the university is too cheap to install good cameras, so their faces weren’t caught. Unluckily for the rest of the floor, you all had to shell out forty bucks to pay for a new couch and sterilization of everything else in the room.
“Guilty as charged. He left his Gucci slides in my dorm, and I still have them. Best hookup ever. I didn’t even have to do the walk of shame.” Your friend turns to you, tapping her nails against the table absentmindedly. “Are you going to the Beta Tau Sig party tonight? I think I’ll try to find someone there instead.”
“Actually, Jeno invited me to a beach bonfire, and I said I’d go.”
“So you both have dates tonight,” Giselle sighs, tapping her fingers against the table surface absentmindedly. “I guess I’ll have to drag Karina out with me this time.”
“It’s not a date,” you protest, and Yeeun gives you a look, observing you for a second before a sly smile forms on her face. “So you wouldn’t mind Giselle giving your number to Juyeon?”
“Sure, go for it,” you shrug, picking up your pencil to continue with your assignment. Your phone buzzes. You can see it’s a text from Jeno, and you want to open it, but you don’t. “You know I don’t do relationships, but I’m down for a few drinks or whatever.”
“Really? You sure?” Yeeun prods, and you give her an exasperated look. “Yes! It’s fine.”
“Okay, sent.” Giselle pipes up, waving her phone around for emphasis. Yeeun looks at you, an indescribable look on her face. “Great.”
“Great,” you echo her sentiment before the sudden realization of what you just did finally hits you like a bag of bricks. Great. For some reason, you briefly ponder over what Jeno would think, but then you shake that away and try to refocus on calculating stock dividends and EPS.
Earnings per share.
When you finally open up his text message and see it’s a picture of him and Yangyang’s cats, you wonder how many cat pictures it took for Jeno to earn a share of your affections. You lost count sometime after you created a specific album for them on your phone.
Or maybe you just didn’t want to acknowledge how fast he was growing on you, like the exponential curve on an economic business cycle. Except that once it hits its peak, it will inevitably lead to a recession, or worse, a depression.
Hurriedly, you push that thought away into the farthest crevice of your mind, sending back a slew of heart and cat emojis back before turning your phone face down and returning to your assignment.
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v. liar, liar, pants on [bon]fire.
Jeno didn’t tell you that it was a small and private gathering, so when you get out of his car, you were shocked to see that the only other girls there are Mark and Donghyuck’s girlfriends and Renjun’s friend (Although, anyone with eyes can tell that he has an obvious crush on her). The nervous feeling in the pit of your stomach continues to grow throughout the night as you sit on the large towel he brought, mere inches separating the two of you.
His oversized hoodie is draped over your figure, the sleeves almost reaching your fingertips and hem reaching midthigh. You hadn’t thought it’d be this cool out, especially with the bonfire and it still being early September, so you didn’t bring a jacket, but luckily for you, Jeno had worn the hooded sweater underneath his jean jacket. This feels like something a boyfriend would do, you silently muse before shoving that thought away. You’re clearly overthinking it.
Jaemin continues to wriggle his eyebrows at you from the other side of the bonfire whenever he catches your eye, whereas Renjun had given you a surprised look when you arrived and spares you the occasional glance here and there. You haven’t really spoken to him ever since your freshman art class, but have seen him around here and there.
You suspect the sudden cold shoulder back then has something to do with the fact that you hooked up with Jeno, but you were never really sure why. Maybe the dude just had a stick up his ass regarding one night stands, which would be kind of semi-hypocritical by association since his best friends are notorious for them.
“I think we left the s’mores stuff in the car,” Jaemin speaks up, rummaging through the bags of food and alcohol you all had piled up haphazardly in one area. “Can somebody help me get them?”
“I’ll do it,” you hastily volunteer, unable to cope with sitting here next to the cause of your worries and runaway thoughts. You quickly get up, failing to notice the way Jeno’s shoulders droop slightly when you move away.
“Hey, how’ve you been? I haven’t been able to talk to you tonight yet,” Jaemin greets you when you reach him. You quickly brush off any sand clinging to your legs and pull down the hem of your borrowed hoodie.
“Good! I’ve been good, just a little stressed with upcoming midterms,” you sigh, shoving your hands into the front pockets of the sweater as you and Jaemin walk side by side. “What about you?”
“O. Chem is kicking my ass,” he groans, kicking up some of the sand. “I’m honestly reconsidering my whole future career because of this stupid class. Maybe I’ll drop out and become the next Zuckerberg.”
“What, are you going to invent the newest Tinder? Match people based on their kinks?” you tease, and he snorts, lightly elbowing you. “That would make my life so much easier. We should include a filter for pancake haters, too. This morning, the girl called my pancakes dry.”
You gasp, looking positively scandalized. “She did not. That’s basically blasphemy. Literally sacrilegious.”
“Exactly!” Jaemin waves his hands around in emphasis. “Like bitch, please, I separate and beat my egg whites by itself and add extra butter to make my pancakes extra fluffy. I almost made Jeno use his muscles and throw her out.”
You let out a guffaw, peals of laughter escaping from your mouth, and Jaemin grins at you, stopping by the car and unlocking the trunk. “Well, I’m glad to know you agree with me. At least someone appreciates my cooking.”
“Dude, no joke, I would sleep with you again for the pancakes,” you say casually, grabbing one of the bags filled with the s’mores ingredients, and Jaemin almost chokes on his own spit before laughing loudly.
“Oh my god, you’re selling yourself for pancakes now?”
“I take cash, Venmo, PayPal, or pancakes.” You wink at him, and he laughs even harder, slinging one of the remaining two bags over his shoulder and wrapping the handles of the other one around his fingers.
“Don’t worry, you can have the pancakes for free,” he chuckles, the two of you now walking back to the bonfire.
You gasp for a second time in faux offense. “Are you saying you don’t want any of this again?” You exaggeratedly gesture to yourself.
“And are you saying you want some of this again?” Jaemin points to himself with a good natured smirk. The two of you are nearing your group of friends now, their conversations and the crackling flames growing louder. “Didn’t you call my butt pancake flat?”
“I love pancakes though,” you quip, giving him a second wink, and he splutters for a few seconds as you laugh, finally separating from him and walking back to your original spot around the bonfire. Jeno reaches out to take the bag from you, and you hand it over before sitting down next to him as he pulls out the ingredients.
“Here you go.”
Jeno hands you a couple sticks and the opened bag of marshmallows. You take it from him with a quiet “thanks”, spearing the fluffy, sugary concoctions onto two sticks before handing one to Jeno and passing the remaining items to Lana on your left. She and you had bonded earlier over your mutual dislike of your shared elective class aptly titled Shakespearean Comedies. It should've been named Shakespearean Tragedies with the way your grade on the last midterm looks. Absolutely tragic. You’re hoping the professor takes pity on the class and assigns a generous curve.
“Hyuck, there’s no way you’re gonna eat ten s’mores,” Lana chides, holding the marshmallow bag out of her boyfriend’s reach. “Why do you wanna roast that many at the same time anyway?”
“So Renjun doesn’t have any to roast.” Donghyuck beams at her, snatching the bag from her grasp. The mentioned boy frowns at him, pulling out a second unopened bag. “Jokes on you, asshole, there’s a second bag. I hope your teeth rots from all that sugar.”
“Thank you, Renjun, that’s very kind of you.” Donghyuck gives him a sickly sweet smile as he shoves the remaining marshmallows onto the twig. “At least I won’t die alone.”
“You probably shouldn’t say that when he has a pointy metal stick in his hand,” Lana remarks, shaking her head when she finally notices her boyfriend has emptied the entire bag.
Curling his fingers into fists, Renjun turns to Lana with a deadpan expression. “Please. I will give you fifty dollars if you break up with him. I’ll even throw in a free pack of bubble test sheets.”
“You know, someday I might just do it for free,” she says offhandedly, and Donghyuck almost drops his marshmallow loaded stick when he hears that. Immediately, he grabs her hand, interlacing their fingers tightly and letting out a fake laugh. “Ha ha ha, that’s so funny. What a great joke, ha ha, please laugh, too, so I know you’re kidding.”
Lana lets go of his hand to pat his cheek consolingly, but says nothing else as she focuses on roasting her marshmallow. Donghyuck continues to blubber out other pleas, and Renjun sits back, completely satisfied with the scene unfolding in front of him. His friend merely laughs, shaking her head, and you bet she’s probably used to seeing antics like this on a daily basis. Jaemin mimes cracking a whip as Jisung and Chenle laugh until one of their marshmallows drips into the fire and falls off. Judging by the loud cries, it’s probably Chenle’s that was unknowingly sacrificed to the flames. You smile as you watch the younger boys’ antics, laughing along with the rest of the group.
Meanwhile, Mark and his girlfriend remain blissfully unbothered, cuddling under a blanket and toasting their own marshmallows on a shared stick. You wonder if your future holds something like that. It must be nice to have someone by your side, someone to share with, someone to do dumb couple things with, someone to love.
You spare a quick glance at Jeno, who seems to be incredibly focused on roasting his marshmallow. He continues to stare at the toasting sweet with a serious look of concentration on his face, tongue poking out slightly and eyebrows furrowed. Cute. Your lips upturn slightly as you take another peek at the boy next to you.
Unexpectedly, the vibrations from your phone in your back pocket breaks your train of thought, and you pull it out, tapping on the screen to see the newest notification.
[ 9:09 p.m. ] xxx-115-0612: hey this is juyeon! giselle gave me your number, and i was wondering if you wanted to go out for drinks sometime?
“Your marshmallow is on fire,” Jeno remarks casually, and your head shoots up, eyes widening when they settle on the ball of fire at the end of your stick.
“Shoot!”
Dropping your phone, you quickly bring it closer to you and attempt to blow it out. There goes your dessert, literally going up in flames right in front of your eyes. When it finally extinguishes, you’re left with a sad, charred gooey mess. Wonderful. It’s the perfect representation of your life.
“Must’ve been something important since it made you commit s’more murder,” Jeno comments, and you sigh, shaking your head as you pick up your phone and shove it back into your pocket.
“No, it’s nothing. Giselle gave my number to Juyeon, and he just texted me.”
“Oh. I didn’t know you were into dudes like that,” he mutters, and you throw him a curious look before prodding.
“Like what?”
“Y’know… just… pretty boys, I guess,” he flounders, flustered and trying to think of any explanation. You snicker at that, giving him an amused glance. “One: have you seen Hyunjin? Two: are you saying you aren’t a pretty boy?”
“Oh, am I your type?” Jeno puffs up his chest and bats his eyelashes at you, and you chuckle, giving him a half smile. “I slept with you once, didn’t I? Himbos are my type, I guess.”
“Hey, I take offense to that. I agree with the hot part, but I have a sexy brain, too. I’m the whole package. I’ll have you know I accepted a job offer from Microsoft already,” he scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Yeah? Did they take a look at your dick and realize you were the perfect fit?”
Donghyuck chokes on his s’more before letting out a loud cackle after Lana pats his back, sending you an amused grin. Renjun and Jaemin are howling with laughter, and the latter sends you another wink. The rest of the group only laughs even harder when Jeno is unable to offer you a coherent response, besides giving you the stink eye. You shrug, giving him an innocent smile instead before finally taking a good look at the damage done to your marshmallow.
Jeno notices you gazing forlornly at your destroyed snack and wordlessly switches it with his, handing you his stick with a perfectly roasted marshmallow at the end of it. Seeing you look like a kicked puppy makes him want to punch whoever decided to commit violence against the hypothetical dog. Even if it means giving up the marshmallow that he just roasted to absolute perfection. He didn’t go through twelve years of Boy Scouts for nothing. Making campfires and the best s’mores were two of his best earned badges.
“Wait, you don’t have to eat that,” you protest, unsuccessfully trying to take yours back, but he shakes his head, holding it out of your reach as he quickly assembles his s’more. “Nah, I like them like this anyway. Just eat that one.”
“I—” You helplessly watch as he takes a bite of the burnt atrocity. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I like it. You should eat that one when it’s still warm.” Jeno motions towards the stick still in your grasp, eyes gleaming. “Or do you want me to make you the s’more too? I can even feed it to you.”
Your cheeks heat up as you hastily make your own dessert, mumbling, “No, I got it, thanks.”
When you finish, you break it in half, handing one side to Jeno and taking the rest of the charred dessert left amidst his objections. “You’re a terrible liar. Nobody likes eating burnt stuff. And don’t lie, I saw you spit it out behind you when I was making mine.”
For good measure, you taste the remainder of the burnt mess, spitting it out immediately and tossing the rest into the bonfire. You turn towards him, scolding, “Yeah, this is horrible. Why’d you even give me yours, dumbass? You shouldn’t have eaten that.”
“You just looked really sad,” he mumbles, refusing to make eye contact as his cheeks turn rosy. He busies himself by taking a bite of the s'mores half you gave him, and your face grows warm at his confession. Your stomach does a weird flip flop, and you chalk it up to those questionable hot dogs Mark had brought earlier. You know you should never trust his cooking, but the hot dogs are pre-made and all you had to do was roast them over the fire.
“Oh.” You don’t know what else to say, awkwardly thanking him, and stammer out, “W-well, I can make another one and we can split that to make it even.”
Jeno gives you a mischievous smile. “But what if you burn it again?”
“It was a one time thing! I was just distracted,” you defend yourself weakly, and he laughs, eyes curving into pretty moon crescents once more, and you silently chide yourself when you catch yourself fawning over them. Like Megara says, “My head is screaming ‘Get a grip, girl.’” But she was basically in love with a Greek God, so she deserves to get a pass for eventually ending up with him (Although, you suppose you could make the argument that Jeno has the body of a Greek God, or maybe he’s like a modern day Adonis, but you digress).
“I’ll do it,” he decides, grabbing another marshmallow, and you make a face at him. “Are you saying I suck at making s’mores?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
You frown at him, crossing your arms over your chest with a pout. “You know, just a thought, but if you’re trying to hook up with someone, you shouldn’t insult their s’mores making skills.”
“But wouldn’t you hook up with someone who’s good at cooking, so you don’t have to cook?”
“Oh my god, are you setting me up with Jaemin now?” You let out a fake gasp, and the boy in question gives you a mock salute from his seat. Jeno glares at you, extremely offended, as he pulls the marshmallow off of the heat. “You know, I don’t think I’m gonna share this with someone who doesn’t appreciate my cooking.”
“You can have one of mine instead, Y/N. I have eight extra,” Donghyuck offers, and you hold back a laugh when you see the immediate sulky expression painted all over Jeno’s face.
“No, take this one.” Jeno shoves the newly made gooey sweet in your hand and snatches the one from Donghyuck. You can’t help but smile at his childish antics, pretending to examine the one he had handed to you.
“What’s the difference between them?”
“Hyuck’s was made with spite.” He winks at you exaggeratedly, and you playfully roll your eyes before taking a bite of it. “Mine was made with love.”
You almost choke, nearly hacking up a lung, as Chenle and Jisung make fake gagging noises at that. Lana helpfully pats your back a few times during your coughing fit, and you weakly thank her.
“You’re gonna kill somebody with that ingredient,” you tell him when you finally stop wheezing, and Jeno chuckles, eyes sparkling. He nudges you gently, a cheesy grin on his face.
“But that ingredient is just for you, and you’re still breathing.”
At that, your chest seizes up, and your heart constricts as your breath hitches in your throat. You give him a tight smile, laughing a little nervously in agreement. With the rate you’re going now, you’re not so sure how long the second half of that statement will remain true.
Later that night, after Jeno drove you home (and wouldn’t let you return his hoodie yet again, citing it as another excuse to see you much to your secret delight), you stare at the text from Juyeon for a long time. You lightly gnaw on your bottom lip, rereading it over and over again. Finally, you swipe your finger over it and delete the text.
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vi. two samoyeds walk into a (boba) bar.
It’s a Thursday afternoon in early October when you decide to take Jeno to your favorite place off campus: a small boba tea bar found nestled in between a laundromat and bookstore down the small alley that broke off from the main street. You had stumbled upon it after a mishap with cheap boxed wine and your favorite white pair of jeans and you had to find a 24 hour laundry place since the on campus one was closed for the night.
This is your special secret place—as childish as that may sound, as if it’s your treehouse hideout back when you were seven—but it’s the place you go to when you need some time alone, the spot not even Yeeun knows about. And yet, something in you decided that you wanted to share it to Jeno.
“Okay, you can’t tell anyone about this place. You have to swear on secrecy.” You stick out your pinky finger towards Jeno, stopping in front of the alley. He gives you an amused look, but acquiesces to your request.
“Pinky promise, cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle through my eye. Scout’s honor.” He loops his pinky finger around yours and softly squeezes it before letting go. “Satisfied?”
“Very.” Then, you break out into a huge grin, almost wriggling in excitement because for the first time in your four years at university, you were going to show someone else your favorite place to visit. You grab his hand and pull him down towards the shop, like a child eager to show her teacher her latest drawing. “Okay, Cloudy with a Chance of Boba is down here. You’re gonna love it. They even have a dog!”
Chuckling, he lets you drag him towards the quaint boba bar. It is a cozy hang out place with soft glowing light bulbs, hammocks and chair swings, small nooks and crannies filled with plush pillows for you to sit in with wicker trays to place your drinks and snacks on, instead of the usual tables. There is even a loft area converted into a small library-esque space with several canary yellow overstuffed armchairs and vintage furniture. Cute modern paintings of dogs and cats of various sizes are scattered here and there along with pretty minimalist drawings directly on the walls. And the best part? It’s a dog friendly area, and the owner brings her Samoyed almost daily.
You like to try a different drink every time you come here, and today, you settle on the cloud matcha tea with boba for yourself and honey waffle fries to share. Once Jeno orders and the two of you receive your food and drinks, you make a beeline towards your self-designated spot: the comfortable nook in the wall all the way in the back.
You carefully place the waffle fries on the wicker tray in the center before handing your drink to Jeno. He wordlessly accepts it, and you carefully make your way in, settling against the plethora of comfortable pillows and seat cushions. Jeno gives you both his and your drinks before he also crawls into the comfy space. The two of you lean against the back, legs comfortably stretched out in front of you and fairy lights illuminating from above.
“So this is your secret hiding spot?” Jeno says, raising an eyebrow at you. An endeared expression flits across his face when he notices you happily snuggling into your corner of the nook and sipping your drink.
“Yes.” You reach for one of the waffle fries, munching on it and making a satisfied noise, before taking another one.
“Nobody else knows about it?” he inquires curiously, eyes roaming around the place.
“Well, Jaemin knows actually.” You shrug, pulling your legs up and crossing them leisurely. “Funny story, the first time I ran into him here freshman year, I got the shock of my life. Apparently, I’m not the only one who likes to visit Snowball every week. Sometimes, Jaemin shows up when I’m already here or vice versa. Snowball’s been two timing us, can you believe it?”
Jeno laughs, and you smile at him, eyes crinkling in the corners. “Do you like it here?”
He smiles softly, watching you with a tender look on his face. “I like it.”
Your grin transforms into a bigger one as you fill with pride, pleased with your decision to reveal this top secret location. “Good.”
You take a sip of your drink, content with today’s choice, before you notice Jeno looking at you with a smirk on his face. You grab another fry before casually saying, “I know what you’re about to say, and you better not say it unless you don’t want me to share my fries with you anymore.”
“I wasn’t about to say anything,” he protests, and you give him a deadpan expression. “Oh, really? You weren’t about to make a joke about how there are balls in my mouth?”
“First off, you said it, not me. And second off, no.” He pauses, leaning over to grab another fry. “But now that you mentioned it, I could think of something better than those balls in your mouth.”
You narrow your eyes at him before wordlessly pulling the tray of fries to you and away from his line of reach. You then proceed to eat four or five of them in rapid succession amidst his objections.
“Hey, hey, I was about to say fries! The ‘something better’ are those fries!” he exclaims as you give him a dubious look, shoving another fry in your mouth. Finally, he relents, distress evident in his tone, “Okay, so maybe I was about to say my balls, but please don’t eat them all, I’m sorry!”
You give him another hard stare before finally sliding the tray back to its original position, and he sighs in relief. The two of you continue to enjoy your snacks, enjoying every sip and bite until the basket is nearly empty of fries. And when Snowball the Samoyed finally makes its presence known, Jeno’s eyes positively light up. He hurriedly scrambles out from the nook and out onto the floor, immediately crouching down to pet the fluffy dog. You quickly follow suit, absolutely delighted when Snowball recognizes you and tries to lick your face happily. You play with the dog for a few more minutes before moving back, letting Jeno enjoy its full attention.
Propping your elbow on your knee, you lean your head on your hand, gazing at Jeno and lost in thought. There’s one question that’s been stuck in the back of your mind all these years, and the one person who can answer them is now sitting in front of you.
The boy in question glances over at you, mouth twisting into a familiar smirk. “Is there something on my face or am I just that good looking?”
You scoff, turning away to cover your smile. “Neither. I’m just thinking.”
“About?” He prompts, continuing to pet Snowball even as the dog starts to shove its head into its food bowl, happily eating its dinner.
“Why didn’t you call me?” You finally ask, fiddling with the straw of your half finished drink absentmindedly. “I gave you my phone number, and I really thought you were gonna call me after that night.”
Jeno remains silent for longer than usual as the question is now in the air, and you almost regret it. You had barely talked to him all those years, yet after just a few months, the two of you strangely feel so comfortable around each other, like you don't have to filter your words or can show him the worst of you. Perhaps, this is what happens when you share a traumatic experience with someone. You bond in a weird, convoluted way. Or maybe you just really don’t give a shit what Jeno thinks of you, and vice versa. But perhaps you shouldn’t have brought up something from the past, and you start to tell him to forget it when he finally responds.
“I did call you. I called you right after my classes were over,” he says at last, refusing to meet your gaze. “You picked up, or at least, I thought you did, but I guess you didn’t realize it? Anyway, you were mid rant with someone, listing a bunch of stuff that went wrong the other night. ‘Worst experience of your life, even worse than your first time with your ex when the condom got stuck’ if I remember correctly?”
You wince, remembering that that was one of the less vivid descriptions about your experience you had given to Yeeun that day. “Did you hear all of it?”
“I hung up after that. I mean I didn’t really want to stick around to get my heart crushed even more by the girl I liked, you know?” he says casually, and your heart twists in your chest at that. You didn’t know he had liked you. Suddenly, the lump in your throat doubles in size.
“You liked me?” You whisper out, horrified at this revelation.
“Yeah. You probably didn’t recognize me, but we were in the same lecture for that one mandatory freshman elective. You were always super vocal and challenged the professor’s stances, which I thought was really cool.” He stops petting Snowball, giving you a half smile as he jokes, “So I was about to piss my pants when you sat down next to me at that party and started talking to me. I had no idea what to do, so I started showing you pics of my cats, and when you were actually interested in them, that just sealed the deal. Until you know, the next day.”
“Oh my god. Oh my freaking god,” you repeat, mind racing at ten thousand miles per second. “Is that why I had to return your jacket by giving it to Renjun to give to you? He gave me the stink eye in our drawing class for the rest of the semester! I didn’t know this at all, oh my god, I’m so sorry.”
Jeno looks concerned and tries to reassure you, “Hey, it’s no big deal. It was like three years ago. I’m a big boy. I got over it.”
“No, but you don’t understand. I liked you, too,” you say weakly, mind still reeling and thoughts all over the place. It’s almost as if your brain refuses to compute this new piece of information and make it make sense.
Eyes widening, he makes a noise of confusion, cocking his head to the side. If you weren’t so caught off guard by the sudden unexpected news, you would’ve made some comment about him looking like the overgrown puppy still burying its head in its food bowl. “But you said it was the worst—”
“I know what I said, but do you really think I’d let you continue if I didn’t like you?” You interrupt him before he can give you a second cringeworthy walk down memory lane of that conversation. “Plus, if you had stayed on the line for like twenty seconds longer, you would’ve heard me admitting my dumb crush on you.”
His mouth silently forms an O-shape at this new revelation, and the two of you sit there in silence, mulling over the sudden turn of events. Snowball wanders off to see if he can steal food from some other unsuspecting customers.
“So does this mean I could’ve met Snowball three years ago instead of just now?” He says at last, giving you a small smile and breaking the tension.
You chuckle quietly, “I guess so.”
“And we could’ve been boning for all these years.”
“Okay, calm down, I don’t like you that much.” You choke on a laugh, and his eyes glimmer as the grin on his face widens when he catches onto your little slip.
“So you admit to liking me now,” he says, the corners of his lips quirked up, and he raises an eyebrow at you.
“What?”
“You said ‘I don’t like you that much’, which means you do like me to some extent,” he informs you smugly, and your face heats up.
“Didn’t. I said I didn’t like you that much. As in past tense,” you attempt to correct him and cover your tracks, but he merely hums in response, not wiping the smirk off his face. If anything, it just grows bigger, much to your frustration.
“So wanna make up for lost time in my room later on?”
Jeno wriggles his eyebrows at you, and you toss a throw pillow at him in retaliation. He ducks in time and laughs loudly, eyes crinkling in the corners and forming moon crescents. You sink back into the remaining pillows, crossing your arms over your chest with a slight huff.
“In your dreams and in my nightmares only.”
“You dream about me? That’s so cute.” He gives you another one of his signature eye smiles, and your stomach flip flops. You force yourself to push away the uneasy feeling building up in the back of your mind.
“It was a nightmare.”
“Still a dream.” He reaches out to pat the fluffball that came trotting back towards you, an expression of pure delight appearing on his face. That feeling of nerves comes up again, but you paint on what you hope to be a convincing smile.
“Shut up, Jeno.”
Jeno smirks at you, coming over to you and sitting close enough that your thigh and arm are pressed against his. His face is mere inches from yours now, and his eyes twinkle mischievously. He reaches out to brush the stray strand of hair from your face, and your breath hitches in your throat as he leans in even closer.
“Make me.”
Immediately, you shove a waffle fry in his mouth, rapidly turning away before he notices how warm your face has gotten, and he laughs loudly, swallowing the fry before moving back to his original spot and focusing his attention back on Snowball with more eager pets. Pressing your hand to your chest, you feel your heart rate slowly go back to normal. That was close.
Too close.
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vii. cat-astrophe in the making.
[ 10:34 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: are you busy
[ 10:34 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: i’m catsitting
[ 10:35 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: {image.jpeg}
[ 10:35 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: can you bring me food
[ 10:35 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: poppy fell asleep on me and I can’t move
[ 10:35 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: help me
[ 10:36 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: i’m gonna starve out here and die and it’s gonna be all your fault
[ 10:36 p.m.] catboy 🐈: when the police find my body they’re gonna find a note that says “Y/N did it” in my notes app
Balancing a cardboard box containing one large combo pizza in one hand, you ring the doorbell of Apartment #21 on 727 Maisie Street, one door to the left of Jeno and Jaemin’s shared place. Tapping your foot on top of the cute doormat in the shape of a paw print and the words “PURR-FECT HOME” etched upon it, you wouldn’t be surprised if Jeno tried to buy one for his apartment (It would be rather fitting with that pair of boxers he owns). Jaemin probably wouldn’t let him though because it would clash with the interior design that he painstakingly put together using IKEA furniture and some pieces he forced the other Nu Chi Theta boys to help him carry home after some stranger left them out by the curb.
The door swings open, and Jeno’s face brightens up when his eyes zero in on the carb loaded, cheesy goodness you brought with you. “Thank god, food is finally here. What took you so long?”
“Yeah, it’s great to see you, too,” you reply sarcastically, brushing past him and leaning down to unzip the cute black ankle boots you recently bought online during the Steve Madden 30% off sale. Thank god you managed to snag the last pair in your size.
“Where’s the ‘Thank you, Y/N, for leaving Kunhang’s party to bring me food? I’m eternally grateful and in your debt forever’ followed up with ‘You’re welcome, Jeno, it’s no problem at all. It’s not like I waited forty minutes for them to make your personal pizza specifically with those stupid red onions you like.’”
“You know, people are gonna think you’re even crazier than you already are if they hear you talking to yourself like that,” he says casually, taking the pizza from your hands, and you glare at his back, kicking off your shoes by the doorway and trailing behind him as he places it on the kitchen table.
“Fuck you.”
“Fuck me yourself,” he retorts. You let out a poorly concealed scoff, and he just gives you a teasing grin. An adorable, slightly overweight Siamese cat jumps onto the table, sniffing the box. You almost forgive Jeno for cutting your night out short when the pretty feline comes over to you and nudges your hand for a pet.
“Hey, did you get—”
“Ranch to dip the crusts in? Yeah, I did,” you answer, taking a seat, and he rips a few paper towels off from the roll near the sink before coming back and handing you one of them.
“You read my mind.”
“It was a quick read.”
He playfully glares at you, and your lips curl into an innocent smirk. You bat your eyelashes at him until he rolls his eyes, moving to sit across from you. You open up the box of heaven, taking a deep inhale of the greasy deliciousness. Pan pizza will always remain superior, no matter what Johnny says about Chicago deep dish pizza.
Pulling out a slice, you immediately take a bite of it, almost moaning from how good it is. Kunhang had bribed you to come to his party (in celebration of Chinese Singles Day on November 11th, but you’re one hundred percent sure he just used that as an excuse to dip into the frat’s event budget) with the offer of free pizza. As a broke college student, the words “free” and “pizza” combined together are basically the holy grail, so you obviously agreed to attend. However, when you showed up, the only thing you saw was an expired DiGiorno's pizza left thawing on the counter. You were definitely not impressed.
“I thought you said Poppy was stuck in your lap,” you say, chewing slowly as Jeno basically scarfs down an entire slice in seconds before reaching for a second one. You’re kind of impressed, but mostly disgusted when you’re reminded how college boys are basically garbage disposals when it comes to food.
“She was,” he answers, swallowing another mouthful of cheese and tomato sauce, before continuing, “But she ran off when she heard the doorbell.”
“Why didn’t you just move her then?” you remark, and he dramatically gasps, making it seem like you had just suggested for him to run the cat over with his Lexus instead.
“I can’t do that!” Jeno exclaims, scandalized, before lowering his voice to a hushed tone. “She chose me.”
“Yeah, well, she chose me now,” you say smugly, nodding down towards the ball of fur curled up in your lap, eyes sleepily blinking up at you. “She looks like a cute little shrimp. Have you fed her yet?”
“Yeah, Mrs. Jung told me to feed her at 7 p.m. so she already ate earlier.”
“How long are you catsitting for?” You gently scratch under Poppy’s chin and she lets out a pleased purring noise, her body vibrating slightly along with it.
“Just until Sunday evening. I have to come in the morning and the evening to water the plants and feed her. Apparently, Poppy eats too much and forgets to breathe, so I have to spoon out her food a little at a time or else, she’ll just shove her face in it all and throw up.”
Poppy nudges her cute little face into the crook of your arm, and you coo over her, softly rubbing the top of her head. “She’s an angel.”
“She destroyed five rolls of toilet paper today.”
“Still an angel.”
“... You’re right.”
“Of course, I am.” You grin satisfactorily, and Jeno only shakes his head, smiling to himself. The two of you finish off the rest of the pics until an empty cardboard box covered in grease stains is all that’s left. He picks up the box and used makeshift napkins, tossing them into the kitchen trash can and making a mental note to take out the garbage on Sunday after he feeds Poppy in the evening.
“So what are your plans for Christmas?”
You and Jeno are sprawled out on the throw rug in the living room. He’s laying flat on his back with Poppy perched on his stomach, happily stroking her back as she purrs loudly. You lean back on your outstretched palms, oddly endeared by the sight in front of you. But it’s cuffing season, so you blame it on that and the cold weather for the sudden urge to cuddle the hell out of the boy and cat in front of you.
“Mm, I’m gonna see if I can power through all fifteen seasons of Criminal Minds before the break is over.”
Poppy pads over to you and settles in your lap, curling up into a small ball again, tail flicking back and forth. Jeno frowns, sitting upright as he looks at you. “You’re not going home?”
“My sister and I pooled our money together to pay for a cruise for my parents since it’s their thirtieth anniversary,” you explain, carefully petting Poppy. “And my sister is staying with her boyfriend, so I have the whole break to myself.”
Jeno stays quiet for a moment, lost in thought, and you focus all your attention on the fluffy cat, reaching out for the jingling ball toy nearby. You shake it, catching Poppy’s attention immediately as she tries to swat it out of your hand. You wave it back and forth, watching as her eyes trail the bright, two toned ball, her ears twitching.
“I’m going home for the holiday break. You should come with me,” he says at last, and you drop the ball in shock. Poppy lunges over and pounces on it, the loud jingling noise immediately bursting forth.
Your first instinct is to say no, but you pause. Yeeun is flying out to the Swiss Alps for her annual family ski trip, and you really don’t want to stay in your apartment alone because that means you’re going to have to kill any spiders you see by yourself.
“Are you… are you sure? I don’t want to intrude.”
“Yeah, it’s no big deal. Jaemin comes over to celebrate with us, too, on Christmas Eve.” Jeno shrugs, leaning over to grab the ball and shake it around. Poppy jumps up and tries to grab it. “My sister is studying abroad, so it’s just me and my mom this time. I’m sure my mom would like the extra company.”
He wants you to meet his mom, you think silently to yourself. Your stomach flips at the thought of that, and you are definitely going to say n—
“You can see Bongsik, Seol, and Nal, too,” he continues, and the rejection dies on the tip of your tongue. You can’t believe you’re really reconsidering your answer because of cats.
“Okay, what day are you driving home? And what does your mom like? Don’t give me that look, Jeno, I can’t just come empty handed. I’m not a freeloader, like Donghyuck, you know.”
You’re doing this for the cats. You repeatedly remind yourself that this is for the felines, and not because you like to see that stupid grin that Jeno is currently sporting on his face. This is solely for the sake of seeing cute furry creatures. That is all this is for.
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viii. merry christmas, ya filthy animals.
When you had arrived with Jeno on her doorstep at the start of winter break, Jeno’s mother immediately pulled you in for a hug and welcomed you happily. She had been incredibly kind and made you feel invited and at home right away, instructing Jeno to put your small suitcase in his sister’s room where you will be staying before whisking you off to show all of Jeno’s baby photos with glee as he loudly complained behind you both. Your entire stay so far has been simply wonderful.
“Y/N, would you mind helping me with this?”
His mother requests in a soft voice, and you agree immediately, going over to her side and picking up the vegetables and going over to the sink, washing them carefully in the colander. She smiles at you before focusing on basting the small roast beef for your Christmas Eve dinner. “Thank you, sweetie. I would ask Jeno, but he’s not too good with knives.”
“Hey!” Jeno protests loudly, entering the kitchen, but he quiets down when his mother glances over at him with a raised eyebrow. “Okay, fine, I accidentally cut myself twice last time, but that was it!”
“He’s a walking hazard in the kitchen.” Jeno’s mother shakes her head. “It’s a good thing he lives with Jaemin now, or else his entire diet would consist of ramen and protein shakes.”
“Mom!” Jeno whines, and she chuckles, “Why don’t you go set the table out for us, honey? Is Jaemin eating with us this time?”
“No, he’s going to come over later after he has dinner with his family.” Jeno pulls out the plates and utensils from the cabinet and drawers, stacking them up before he carries them out to the dining room. You smile absentmindedly, watching his figure disappear before realizing your hands are growing slightly numb under the running cold water and quickly turn off the faucet and shake the colander.
“You make him really happy.”
Startled, you look over to see Jeno’s mother smiling at you fondly, hip leaning against the counter. Her eyes are kind, and they match Jeno’s. Turning back to focus on preparing the main dish, she continues, “He’s never brought a girl home before. But I can see why my son likes you so much.”
“O-oh, we aren’t dating,” you stammer out, cheeks warming up at the implication. The bell pepper in your grasp slips from your hand, and you hastily catch it in time, stopping it from rolling off the cutting board. “We’re just friends.”
“Of course, my mistake,” his mother acknowledges before giving you a genuine smile, an indescribable look in her eyes: a mixture of knowing with a hint of melancholy—one that only a mother would understand. “The way he looks at you though… and you at him.”
She flashes another soft smile at you, a tinge of nostalgia sweeping her features. “Nevermind that, excuse me, I’m just rambling. Should we finish making dinner? I think everything smells delicious so far! And I’m so excited to try your homemade macarons!”
You hesitantly return her smile with one of your own, forcing down the swirling abyss of inexplicable emotions that had erupted from her words and tries to rear its ugly head at you. When Jeno pokes his head back into the kitchen, his mother puts him on mashed potato duty, and he groans but acquiesces. As his mother chatters on, the two of you work side by side, his arm brushing against yours every once in a while. You desperately quell the colony of butterflies that flutter in your stomach.
The dinner preparation continues smoothly, and dinner is served. It’s a light hearted affair, and Jeno’s mother proceeds to tell many fun anecdotes about his childhood, making him protest in embarrassment and you laugh over all the mishaps he and Jaemin had gotten into when they were younger. You make sure to file away the story consisting of school music recitals, too much apple juice, and a very unfortunate accident for future blackmail. When it is time for dessert, his mother gushes over the matcha macarons you made for her as a present along with the pretty bouquet of gardenias and camellias that she carefully arranged in a vase now displayed on the end of the dining table.
After dinner, she bids the two of you good bye when she has to go off to her late night shift at the hospital, hugging you warmly and telling Jeno she’ll be back tomorrow by noon. When she leaves, the two of you plop down on the couch in the living room, sprawled out comfortably on opposite ends and careful not to disturb the three snoozing cats lying on the top of the furniture.
“Wanna pick out a movie? Jaemin should be coming over in fifteen minutes,” Jeno says, picking up the remote and flicking on the television. “Oh, there’s the usual Harry Potter marathon on.”
“I’m good with that.” You shrug before sitting upright as a sudden thought comes to mind. “Wait, be right back.”
You dash upstairs to the room you’re staying in, leaving a bewildered Jeno behind. Rummaging through your suitcase, you pull out a neatly wrapped box and three smaller ones. Clutching them to your chest, you hurry back down before nervously thrusting them at him, and he barely catches them before they almost fall to the floor.
“I got you a present.” You anxiously twist your hands together behind your back as you try to keep your voice calm. “My family and I like to open our presents during Christmas Eve since none of us are early risers, and well, I thought you could maybe open it now?”
Jeno stares at the boxes for a moment before looking at you, the largest smile spreading across his face and relief washes over you like a tidal wave. “You got me a present.”
“I got one for Bongshik, Seol, and Nal, too.”
“You got presents for my cats, too?” He positively beams at you before standing up and quickly making his way to the stairs. “Wait, hold on, I got you something, too.”
You sit down on the couch, and he returns with a gift bag, sitting down next to you and sheepishly handing it over. “Sorry, I’m not good at wrapping presents, and Jaemin wasn’t around to help me.”
You pull out the tissue paper, a familiar object falling out, and when you recognize the tell tale fluorescent orange color, you laugh freely, grinning up at him. “Thank you, Jeno, I needed a Tide pen.”
“Just in case I accidentally spill any more drinks on you.” He puts his hands up innocently before motioning towards the bag with a softer smile. “But that’s just the gag gift.”
You dig deeper into the bag and pull out a small box. Untying the pretty white ribbon on top, you take off the top, and your eyes widen as you breathe out, “Oh my god.”
Your fingers wrap around a thin, delicate gold chain with tiny dotted spherical beads spaced out and your first name’s initial in dainty cursive and matching gold threaded on it. You carefully lift it out, and it sparkles as it catches the Christmas tree lights from different angles.
“Do you… like it?” Jeno chews his bottom lip nervously, “Jaemin helped me pick it out because I wasn’t too sure, but it’s too late now to—”
“I love it,” you interrupt, smiling at him.
“Oh, thank god,” he sighs, relief written all over his face as he watches you wrap the bracelet around your wrist. “Wait, let me help you with it.”
He reaches out and carefully grasps onto the loop and clasp on either side of the chain, the tip of his tongue sticking out slightly as he concentrates on securing the bracelet. You gaze at him, the corner of your lip quirking up into an endeared smile.
“Got it,” he announces proudly, grinning at you, and your smile widens. “Thank you, Jeno.”
His smile grows as well before he glances down at the wrapped packages in his lap. Picking up the largest one with his name written across the tag on the front, he shakes it slightly before raising an eyebrow at you. “So what are you giving me?”
“My virginity.”
Jeno nearly chokes, and you wink and give him finger guns. He narrows his eyes at you, poorly disguising his chuckle as a scoff. “Nice try. But I already know about your first time—that lost condom horror story from high school.”
“Ah, right.” You lean back against the cushions comfortably before gesturing towards the boxes. “Why don’t you open them and see what it is then?”
He eyes you suspiciously before unwrapping the present, pulling off the top of the box, and his eyes grow round before immediately darting over towards you. “Is this….?”
“I thought it’d match your boxers.” You shrug, and the tips of his ears grow red. He pulls out a large maroon sweater with Bongshik’s, Seol, and Nal’s faces knitted on the front along with his name at the bottom and “PROUD CAT DAD” across the top.
“Oh my god.” He immediately pulls it over his head and tugs over it over his body before turning to you with an ear splitting grin. “I fucking love it, holy shit, Y/N, thank you.”
“Wait til you open the other presents.” You motion towards the three smaller boxes, and his eyes widen once more as he gasps, “You didn’t…”
You grin. “I did.”
Jeno immediately tears open the smaller boxes, pulling out similar miniature versions of his own sweater: one with each cat’s face and name knitted on them. He looks positively delighted, bouncing in his seat as he beams at you. “Wait, help me put these on them, so I can take a picture of them with me.”
You grab Seol’s sweater from his hand and reach out to pick up the sleepy cat from the top of the couch. Carefully, you tug the sweater onto his fluffy body. Much to your relief, the cat didn’t squirm, allowing you to quickly put it on. Jeno nimbly puts the sweater on Nal before carrying Bongshik to his lap and slowly pulling on the last sweater over her head.
“Perfect!” he says happily before extending his phone towards you. “Can you take a picture of us?”
“Yeah, of course.” You take his phone, about to swipe up to open the camera option when you notice his lockscreen. Faltering slightly, you realize with a jolt that it’s a picture of you and him from the bonfire. You push down the uneasy feeling to the pit of your stomach and plaster on a smile as you say, “Okay, ready? I’m gonna count to three.”
Jeno scoops up all his beloved cats in his arms and squishes his face against them. He grins happily, eyes curving into the prettiest moon crescents, and you hate how quickly the butterflies rise in your stomach at that sight. You snap away, taking pictures from various angles before you decide to stop before you use up his entire phone storage. As you try to hand him back his phone, he nimbly wraps his fingers around your wrist and tugs you down next to him.
“You gotta take a picture with us, too,” he insists, eyes sparkling. “This was your gift, you have to be in at least one picture.”
Bongshik comes over and plops down in your lap, staring up at you with her wide, pretty eyes, and you suddenly don’t have the heart to refuse. “Okay, just a few.”
Jeno beams, holding his phone up to snap a selfie of you, him, and his cats. Pressed against his side, you hold up Bongshik and smile, the fluttery feeling in your chest growing exponentially when you see how happy you look next to him. You’re in the middle of telling him to airdrop you the photos when the ringing doorbell cuts you off mid-sentence.
“Oh, that’s Jaemin, right? I’ll get it,” you say, standing up, and Jeno looks like he’s about to protest when you give him a glare. “Seol and Nal are sleeping on you, and don’t you dare wake them up.”
Defeated, he sits there, fiddling with his phone and petting his cats as you saunter over to the front door. When you pull it open, Jaemin looks up from his phone, the slight crease in between his eyebrows disappearing as he roughly shoves the device into his jacket pocket.
“Y/N,” he greets you with a smile before extending the plate in his hands towards you. “My mom wanted to give you guys some freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.”
“Oh my god, please tell your mom I love her.” You snatch up the desserts quickly, mouth already watering at the sight of them. “Come on in, Jaemin, we’re watching the Harry Potter marathon. We can quote the script like we always do and drive Jeno crazy.”
“Oh, ah, I can’t… I, uh, gotta get back home.” He shifts from one foot to the other, giving you a tight smile. You suppose you don’t do a very good job at hiding your disappointment because he quickly backtracks, “I mean I would if I could, but um, my mom needs me back there.”
“Hey, no worries, it’s okay. Maybe next time.” You give him a reassuring smile, and he relaxes. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out something, fiddling with it. “I, uh, got you something for Christmas, too. Just something small.”
You quickly set aside the cookies, and he hands you a little capsule—one of those plastic circular containers you can get from a toy machine. You pop it open, a smile immediately stretching across your face. With a laugh, you hold up a cute little charm of Winnie the Pooh wearing a pancakes costume, admiring Jaemin’s gift for you.
“It’s so cute, oh my god, I love it!”
“You better. It took me seven tries to finally get the pancake one,” Jaemin says, smiling to himself when he sees you immediately attach it to your phone.
“What’s gonna happen to the other six keychains you got?” you chuckle, still admiring the new accessory on your phone. You look up and catch him smiling at you, and he turns away, cheeks flushed.
“I’m gonna give them to the kids at the hospital. I think they’ll all like it,” he answers, and you nod in agreement before your face falls at a sudden realization.
“I’m so sorry, but I don’t have a present for you.” You frown, the corners of your lips downturned, before brightening up when an unexpected thought occurs. “Okay, I know it’s not much, but… I promise I’ll make you the best waffles you’ve ever had whenever you want it.”
“You know how to make waffles?”
“Of course I do! I make the best waffles. This is a one in a lifetime chance to eat the greatest waffles of all time made by yours truly. They could even make Gordon Ramsay cry,” you exclaim, waving your hands around for emphasis before quickly tacking on as an afterthought, “But cry in a good way, not like Mark’s eggs.”
He chuckles, slipping his hands into his pockets. “Alright, I’m holding you to that. I’m gonna cash in that offer one day.”
“Good.” Your eyes twinkle. “Merry Christmas, Jaemin.”
Jaemin bids you goodbye soon after, and you wave him off until he drives off in his car. Carrying the plate of cookies with you, you make your way back to the family room, placing the dish on top of the coffee table. Jeno’s eyes light up, and he all but launches himself at the sweets (thank god the cats have moved off his lap and elsewhere by now).
“Where’s Jaemin?” he casually asks, munching on a cookie, and you frown, plopping down next to him on the couch and tucking your legs under you. “He said he had to go back home for his mom or something.”
“Ah, got it,” he nods, taking a quick peek at his phone, and you sulk, lips jutting out into a pout. “Who’s gonna recite Harry Potter lines with me now?
“Oh thank god, I don’t have to hear another ‘My father will hear about this’ from him,” he sighs in relief, and you chuckle at that before putting on your worst British accent.
“Jaemin will hear about this.”
He struggles to keep a straight face for a good ten seconds before he gives in, a loud guffaw escaping from his mouth, and you grin, rather pleased with yourself.
“‘Yer a wizard, Harry,’” you imitate Hagrid next, much to his delight, and you go through nearly every character until Jeno is in stitches and near tears. You save one of your favorites for last and increase your voice to a higher octave. “Not my daughter, you bitch!”
Jeno lets out another laugh, unable to contain himself as you say haughtily, “Now, if you two don't mind, I'm going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed. Or worse, expelled.”
“Oh my god,” Jeno gasps, laughing breathlessly, eyes disappearing under the shadows of his pretty long lashes. “Holy shit, wait, my sides hurt, shut up.”
Giggling, you teasingly grin, leaning in as you slightly tilt your head to the side, eyes gleaming. “Make me.”
As the laughter subsides, the room grows quiet, and you suddenly realize just how close the two of you are, breath hitching in your throat. Jeno seems to be aware of the short proximity as well as he swallows hard, subtly shifting in his seat. His eyes map out every detail of your face, ending at your lips before flitting back up to meet yours. Your heart feels like it’s about to fall out of your chest, pounding so loudly that you wonder if he can hear it.
“Scared, Y/N?” he whispers, sending the slightest shivers down your spine as you hold your breath. His hand finds yours, and your eyes drop down to see his fingers intertwined with yours.
You let out a quiet laugh, the words finally registering in your mind. You gaze back at him as the corners of your lips quirk up into a smirk. “You wish.”
Before you know it, he lets go of your hand and tugs you even closer, pulling you onto his lap and closing the distance. He captures your lips against his, and your breath hitches in your throat for a second time tonight as you straddle him, the palms of your hands pressed against his chest. He tastes sweet, like chocolate, and you cave into his embrace as his hand reaches up to delicately cradle your cheek. The next kiss is messier, more desperate, and he holds you like he’s scared of losing you, like if he doesn’t feel every inch of your body pressed against his, then this would all be a dream—that you aren’t really here, that this isn’t real.
Your heart ricochets in your chest, sparks flying until a whole damn wildfire is ablaze, and your grip on his shirt tightens, like you’re afraid of letting go and losing yourself. You feel drunk off of his kisses as he trails them down the slope of your neck before leaning up to press another one against your mouth for good measure.
“You wanna see something cool?” he says a little breathlessly when he pulls away, his cheeks and lips both a pretty shade of carmine now. You nod, not trusting your voice in this very moment.
He reaches behind you, carefully slipping his hand under your shirt. Pausing, he waits for your reaction, and when you nod, he continues. After a few seconds, he deftly unhooks the back of your bra before pulling his hand back, a proud expression on his face, and you start to laugh, shoulders shaking and mouth pulled into the prettiest smile that has him stopping to admire the pretty sight in front of him.
“Wow, you broke your record of five minutes,” you finally say, still giggling slightly, and he winks at you. “I had practice.”
“Yeah?” you hum as his hands trail to the undersides of your thighs, and he easily lifts you up as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Are you planning on breaking any other records tonight?”
Eyes glimmering, Jeno grins, leaning in to place another kiss on the corner of your mouth, and your heart races, cheeks growing warmer than ever.
“I’m going for the gold, sweetheart.”
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ix. to be (a coward) or not to be.
You find yourself lying in the cramped twin size bed next to Jeno. Your eyes wander around, taking in your surroundings and memorizing the way the moonlight casts shadows on the bits and pieces that give you a glimpse into the childhood of the sleeping boy next to you. There are posters of old bands and science fair ribbons pinned to the navy painted walls along with shelves filled with dusty sports trophies and action figures. You can see some old pictures of Jeno and Jaemin in high school along with younger versions of a few other boys you recognize from your university lined up on his desk neatly, no doubt framed and arranged by his mother. And then you notice how your clothes are haphazardly strewn throughout the room, intruding upon a space that isn’t yours. You feel so out of place.
Jeno stirs next to you when you shift slightly in your position and wraps his arm around your waist, tugging you closer to him and nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. You gaze at the boy next to you, his delicate features highlighted by the soft glow of the moonlight from the curve of his lips to the pretty mole under his right eye to his long lashes casting shadows on his cheeks. He looks so innocent in that moment, and the guilt pools even deeper in your stomach for what you are about to do.
But you feel like you’re suffocating, almost drowning. A foreign emotion has already crept its way into your heart, and it’s squeezing your lungs until you can’t breathe anymore. There’s a reason why you choose a different pretty boy to spend the midnight hours with every time, a different warm body in your bed each night, a boy you know you won’t ever love for every single one of your short lived relationships.
Falling in love is terrifying. Falling feels a lot like flying until you crash into the pavement, heart smashed into smithereens. Promises are made, only to be broken. Commitment is your worst enemy, and letting someone see you in your most vulnerable moments frightens you more than anything in the world. The thought of letting someone have the power to affect you this much is just unfathomable, and you just can’t give up any part of yourself, can’t show the best and worst parts of you, can’t let yourself be vulnerable. You can’t give your all to someone only for them to confirm your worst fear.
But when you glance over at Jeno and feel the way he holds you so close—almost as if you mean something to him—there’s a tiny voice in the back of your mind telling you to stay. Enveloped in his arms and pressed against his side, you feel safe and protected, like this is where you should be. You wouldn’t mind coming home to this every night. Home. You feel at home when you’re with him, and that thought alone shakes you to the core.
You can’t do it.
You’re too scared to fall in love, too scared to take the chance, too scared to leave your heart in the hands of someone else. So you quietly slide out of his bed, not missing the way his eyebrows furrow as his arm reaches out to hold onto someone who’s already gone. You carefully pick up your scattered clothes and put them back on. You silently pack up your suitcase and find your phone, scheduling an Uber to take you back to your apartment. You pull up his messages and type out another one of your recycled excuses. You hit send, hearing a faint ping! from his phone, before finally exiting his bedroom, missing the way his eyes slowly open and watch you walk away.
It’s a routine you’ve gotten down by now: something as easy as waking up, washing your face, brushing your teeth, and changing out of your pajamas every day before your 8 AM class. You leave before the first rays of the sun peek out, the only trace of you lingering is the disappearing warmth in the sheets. Leaving is the only thing you’re good at. It’s as easy as breathing for you: one step forward, inhale, another step forward, exhale. You keep putting one foot in front of the other until you’re gone.
Bad habits are hard to break, or perhaps you’re too much of a coward to even try.
This is for the best, you say to yourself, repeating those words like a broken mantra in your mind until hopefully, you believe them yourself. You never stay. You never get attached. That’s how it always is. That’s how it has always been. That’s how it will always be. It’s always easier to be the bad guy. This is what you’re good at doing.
But it seems as though you forgot to pack away your heart when you left because there’s an empty ache in your chest during the entire car ride back.
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x. the fujiwhara effect.
When two hurricanes meet, it is called the Fujiwhara Effect. Two whirlwinds spin in the same direction, dancing in circles around a common center. They will eventually spiral into the center point and merge, unless one is more powerful than the other, in which the smaller one orbits around the larger.
Perhaps it was the calm before the storm. You have an awful penchant for screwing things up right when everything is going perfect, so maybe there’s always going to be a storm because you are the storm. It’s simply in your inherent nature to come rushing in and destroying everything good in your path once something becomes too real, too tangible, too permanent. You like to come and go, never staying in one place for too long, tearing through and leaving a war zone—and well, it’s not your fault if a trail of broken hearts is left behind. The warning signs were all there, but they still came to you.
But Jeno is no different. He goes around breaking hearts for fun, discarding them faster than a child plowing through a pile of shiny new toys on Christmas Day. Except he’s a stronger hurricane. And when the two of you eventually crash into each other, your whole world is ripped down the seams until you are spilling everywhere and spiraling out of control, until you’re stuck spinning in circles at his mercy, until you’re getting dizzier and dizzier with each passing second.
It’s all fun and games until it’s not anymore because you’ve made a habit of loving him, made a home in a person, and you recognize the way he looked at you that night. It was the way Yeonjun had looked at you, the way Minhyuk looked at you, the way Hyunjin looks at you, the way Yugyeom looks at Yeeun, the way all those girls look at Jaemin, the way you caught yourself looking at Jeno.
You want to throw up.
This isn’t how it’s supposed to be. You weren’t supposed to catch feelings. You weren’t supposed to go this far. You weren’t supposed to fall in love with him, but you did, and now you can’t bear to deal with the consequences. Your fight or flight instincts kick in, and you do what you always do best.
You run away. Straight back into Hyunjin’s arms.
The scene is eerily familiar as you find yourself back in that same bathroom of the NCT frat house from all those months ago, but with a different boy in tow. Hyunjin pulls you in close, sloppily pressing kisses over every inch of your exposed skin, but it seems so wrong. He kisses you like it’s a means to an end, a desperate race to the finish line to get your clothes off and take what he wants. His hands are on your arms when they should be on your waist or cradling your cheek, he doesn’t smell like citrus and pine, but above all, you feel absolutely nothing.
And that’s exactly how it’s supposed to be.
“Here or bedroom?” he mutters, fingers digging into your hips now, and you barely register the fact that he had asked you something at first.
“Here.” If you close your eyes, you can pretend it’s him instead. But that’s not what you need, so your eyes snap open to stare at the boy in front of you, reminding yourself that it’s not him, that it can’t be him. But want is a slippery slope, and your eyes flutter shut.
It is a mistake.
You see him. You struggle in this battle, the weight on your shoulders now pressing down on your chest, rib cage bending to the point of breaking, a billion thoughts clouding up your mind, your breath escaping between your teeth in uneven increments, and you find yourself careening out of control so rapidly that you grab onto anything, anyone, chest heaving up and down as your eyes snap open.
Hyunjin fumbles with your shirt, roughly grabbing the hem, and you’re clutching onto his belt, until the door bangs open and your heart leaps to your throat at the sight of him.
Lee Jeno: the walking cliché of your wildest dreams and your nightmares simultaneously. He’s living, breathing proof that bad boys who wear the typical leather jacket and drive a sleek car with one hand on the steering wheel, but also have a hidden soft side (because you saw him snuggling with his cats back home every night) actually exist. It’s Lee Jeno who used to have a different girl wrapped around his finger every night or morning or even sometimes mid-afternoon; Lee Jeno with his pretty eye smile that can make you swoon; Lee Jeno with his annoyingly endearing tendencies that you finally understand why so many girls, and even some boys, fall for so willingly.
Or for you, Lee Jeno: the boy who was your first genuine crush. He’s the reason you desperately wished you listened to Jennie when she told you to find an older, more experienced boy to have your first college hookup with, and not a fellow lowly freshman because you never knew a tiny, dumb crush could end up like this three years later. You never would’ve ended up learning that he has three cats that he loves more than anything in the world, that his favorite color is blue because that was Jaemin’s favorite color when they met in kindergarten, that he likes having exactly ten tiny marshmallows in his hot chocolate, that he secretly enjoys those cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies his older sister forced him to watch with her when they were little, that all these little insignificant things have become significant to you because it’s Jeno. It’s no longer a silly crush; it has grown into something so much bigger that has him rooted in your heart, leaving a relentless ache in his wake as the thoughts of him engulf you whole, and it has you feeling absolutely terrified.
“Shit, sorry, I didn’t kno—”
He stops when he realizes it’s you: the one who didn’t return his phone calls when he woke up to an empty bed or answered his texts, the one who got away, the one who somehow made her way into his heart and left a you-shaped hole in it. The hurt flashes in his eyes for a millisecond before it’s replaced by anger at the sight of the other boy, but you still catch it nonetheless, guilt curling up in the pit of your stomach.
“What the fuck?”
“Uh, we’re kinda busy here, dude, so unless you wanna stay and watch—” Hyunjin motions towards the door, but that seems to only make Jeno even more furious.
“Get the fuck out.” His voice is dangerously low, directed towards Hyunjin, but he’s staring at you. Hyunjin slinks out the door, muttering curses under his breath, but you’re frozen under his gaze, remaining perched on the bathroom countertop. The door swings shut, and he stands there, the both of you remaining silent as the muffled music continues to seep through the walls.
“Why?” he whispers, hoarse voice breaking at the end as his true emotions slip through the cracks of his dissipating anger. “Why are you doing this?”
You didn’t think you could find your voice, but at last you do. “What do you mean ‘why’? Isn’t this what we always do? Find someone, fuck, repeat.”
“But you and I—” He stops there abruptly, carding his hand through his hair in frustration. “We just— you and I…”
“You and I what? We slept together. That’s it. You got what you wanted, so that’s the end of it. Aren’t you happy?” You raise an eyebrow at him, pushing down the churning feeling in your stomach. “You can go back to your little body count competition now. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
He keeps his voice level, not falling for your jabs, and it angers you. You want him to be mad at you, want him to finally snap because then you would have a reason to leave, a reason to justify what you’re doing, a reason to not feel so goddamn guilty.
You don’t understand why you feel like this, the guilt eating away inside of you until you’re left with a hollow shell of yourself. It’s not like he and you were exclusive or even worse, dating. You and Jeno don’t date. Dating is not a word in either one of your dictionaries. Hooking up? Yes. One night stands? Of course. Next morning’s walk of shame? Unfortunately, guilty as charged. But dating? That word is foreign on your tongue and his.
He and you are the same. You’re the type of people who just take and take and take, but give nothing back. The type to never commit. The type that girls and boys think “I can change them, I can fix them. Just wait and see.” but it only ends with another broken heart in your collection and an unspoken “I told you so” from their friends. The type who uses empty promises, pretty gift wrapped words, and alluring smiles to get what they want and occupy their next conquest’s every waking thought before, during, and after their encounter. The type to play with a heart until they’re bored and set off to find an even shinier, brand new one. The type to leave and never stay.
The two of you are well versed with how this is supposed to end. But why does it feel like your heart is being crushed at an excruciatingly slow rate with every breath you take?
“Then what was it about?” You challenge, curling your fingers into fists. “What is this about? Do you need an actual review to scrub your now spotless record? Because here’s one: you’ve improved. It was great. Thank you for a fantastic night, now please let me enjoy tonight and go find Hyunjin again or whoever.”
The mention of his name sparks an immediate reaction as his jaw tightens and his entire figure stiffens. “This isn’t about that.”
“What is this about then, Jeno? Did you really think that this—” You gesture between you and him. “—was something?”
He stares at you with his mouth agape. “We spent hours, weeks, months together. I told you things I never even told Jaemin. I invited you to my house for Christmas. I let you meet my mom. I let you meet my cats.”
Your fingernails press so hard into the palms of your hands that you think you almost break skin. You school your expression into one of boredom. “So?”
“So doesn’t that mean something?” He finally explodes, hitting his hand against the wall in frustration as a distraught expression appears on his features. “Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
“Should it?”
He unfurls his fist, answering quietly, “It does to me.”
“But not to me.” The lie falls so easily from your lips, but Jeno can detect a falsity from the truth so easily when it comes to you. He knows you better than anyone else because you two are alike, cut from the same cloth, and that is what scares you the most.
“You’re lying,” he says softly, watching your still figure as you sharply inhale at that. “You wouldn’t share hidden places and secrets and spend time with someone if it all meant nothing to you. You wouldn’t buy custom Etsy Christmas sweaters for their cats or count out the number of marshmallows to add into their cup of hot chocolate or memorize their pizza order or go to three different grocery stores for a specific type of candy for someone if they meant nothing to you. If you didn’t love them.”
“We aren’t… we’re not made for that.” You shake your head. “You and I… we aren’t— aren’t built to care and love, to be cared for and to be loved. It’s been like that for years now.”
“You’re wrong,” Jeno whispers, and he’s looking at you with that exact same tender gaze that’s gotten you into this mess. “You’re wrong because I care about you.”
He swallows hard.
“Because—”
“Don’t.” Your voice breaks as you shake your head desperately. “Please don’t say it.”
“—I love you.”
The hurricanes collide. You’re falling apart.
“Stop. You— no, you don’t. You can’t. You’re fucking lying. Take it back.” You’re reeling, struggling to take back control but it’s too late to put the brakes on now and you’re seconds away from driving over the edge of the cliff.
“I’ve never lied to you, Y/N.” He looks at you with tired eyes, and you feel yourself slowly crumbling. “I’ve screwed up, I’ve done some shitty things, but I have never lied to you. So the least you can do is be honest with me. Do you really feel nothing?”
“I don’t… I’m not… That’s not… That is completely missing the point.” You flounder to find a footing, to find someplace you can hide and feel less exposed and vulnerable. You wrap your arms around yourself, hugging your body tightly and unable to say anything more.
“I love you,” he repeats in a gentler tone, and you can feel his gaze searing into the side of your face. You turn away, unable to look him in the eye and holding back the tears.
“I never asked you to.”
“But I still do.”
Jeno waits a few more moments, but you stay quiet with your eyes turned toward the floor and lips curled inwards and pressed tightly together. He laughs humorlessly, shoulders slumped in defeat as he turns towards the door, his voice echoing in the empty space.
“So I guess this is how it feels.”
You don’t dare to look his way. “This is how what feels?”
He pauses halfway out the door, facing you one last time, and you force yourself to face him at last. The corners of his lips quirk up into a wistful half smile, one that doesn’t quite meet his eyes at all, and it causes your heart to wrench painfully in your chest.
“To have someone break your heart.”
When he disappears, leaving you sitting in the cramped bathroom all alone, you finally let the dam break and the tears spill out. They fall until your pretty white shirt is completely soaked, but this time, no one is here to lend you their jacket and protect you from the cold because you’re the one with ice in your chest in the first place.
It’s supposed to hurt less when you build up the walls and let no one in, but nobody told you how lonely you’d feel. Nobody told you that you’d have to hold up the weight of the entire world on your shoulders alone. Nobody told you how much it fucking hurts to finally let someone inside your garden, only for the flowers you painstakingly planted to get trampled and the fence you put up to be broken when they left.
It always ends up like this: the heartbreaker and the heartbroken. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. So when two heartbreakers meet, it is inevitable that two hearts break. You just never knew it would hurt this fucking much when you have to break two hearts instead of one.
When a smaller hurricane meets with a larger tsunami, it continues to spin around and around the bigger force, faster and faster until it’s careening out of control, until it finally dissipates, until nothing is left, except for the mess it made.
So this is how it feels.
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xi. counterpoises.
When two people are too much alike, the scales tip to one side, growing heavier and heavier, until it topples over and the secrets and insecurities spill out like water, soaking and drowning everything in its path. The glass is either half full or half empty until too much is suddenly poured into it, overflowing onto the sides, and you can’t clean it up. You’re struggling to tread water, lost amidst the waves and sea, separated from the one person you care for most because you let him sink in order to swim.
You stand in front of the familiar shop alone, staring up at the blinking neon sign. It feels as if this is the only place left that remains untouched and pristine in the destroyed aftermath. Your friends mean well, but their questions and constant hovering make you feel like you’re trapped and suffocating once more. You give them half lies wrapped in thin veracity, not wanting to create an even bigger ocean. Because once you tell them the truth, once you tell someone about that night, it means that this was different, that this was real. It means confronting that what you and Jeno had—it meant something to you.
You escape to the one place where no one can find you. You take a deep breath before reaching out and pulling open the door, the cute little jingle immediately playing to announce your entrance. The owner smiles at you, recognizing you after nearly four years, and you greet her back, stepping up to the register to buy your usual.
When your order is ready, you carry the drink and basket of fries to the area you had dubbed your little alcove. Crawling into the familiar space, you place your snacks on the wicker tray and sit back, curling your legs underneath you and closing your eyes. The once cozy space now feels too big for you. You hate that you feel like you’re waiting for someone, anticipating the late arrival of someone who will sit next to you and fill the space that you come to realize is perfect for two.
But of course, he doesn’t show. Not when you pushed him away like that.
A heavy weight shifts the pillows next to you, and your eyes snap open, heart leaping in your chest as you immediately look to your right. Your eyes soften when you see Snowball sitting there. He looks at you, large eyes sparkling and tongue lolling out. Your face softens as he nudged his nose against your hand comfortingly, as if he senses your sadness. You throw your arms around him, burying your face in his fur and hugging him tightly, and he nuzzles his snout against your cheek.
“Thank you, Snowball,” you sigh, loosening your arms around him, and he tilts his head, touching his nose against your cheek, before laying down and resting his head in your lap. You smile down at him, placing your hand on his head and patting him tenderly.
“There you are.”
Startled, you look up and see Jaemin. You give him a tight smile. “Jaemin, I’m not in the mood to—”
“Did you know I’ve been shaking this bag of treats in the front for the past five minutes like a complete idiot, and Snowball still didn’t come?” Jaemin interrupts, wildly waving a plastic bag around in the air, filled with homemade canine snacks. “I even researched top quality dog biscuits recipes and checked with the owner to make sure he can eat this. I spent hours baking these, and he rejected me!”
You let out a snort, a small smile appearing on your face. Jaemin huffs in exasperation, pouting. “Here, you might as well take them and give them to him since he clearly doesn’t love me anymore.”
He thrusts the packet of treats at you and turns to walk away. You hesitate before calling out, “Wait.” He faces you with a raised eyebrow, and you swallow hard, tentatively holding up the dog biscuits. “Shouldn’t you at least wait and see if he likes them? You made them for him.”
Jaemin pauses, gauging your reaction silently before deciding, “Okay, I’ll stay. I wanna see if he’ll eat one. Two max because cookies can’t be that good for him.”
You open the bag and pluck out two of the treats, handing one to Jaemin and keeping one for yourself. Jaemin carefully crawls into the space to sit across from you. The white fluffy dog raises its head from your lap to look at him, tail thumping wildly and hitting his leg.
“Hey, buddy, I brought you some snacks I made.” Jaemin reaches out and strokes Snowball, grinning wildly when the dog sniffs and nudges his hand. He extends his other hand, the biscuit resting in his open palm. Immediately, Snowball snatches it, chewing it quickly with another wag of his tail.
You watch him, the ghost of a smile flitting across your face when you notice the pure, unadulterated joy coming from your friend as he exclaims that Snowball likes his treats. You hand over the second treat to him, and he happily feeds it to the overgrown puppy.
You stay quiet for a moment, contemplating before finally asking, “How was volunteering today?”
Jaemin’s face lights up. “It was really good. Andy drew me another drawing.”
“Oh? what’d he draw this time? Another dinosaur?”
“No, an astronaut.” He smiles, eyes twinkling. “He said once he gets better, he’ll take me on a trip to the moon because there are bunnies on the moon and I look like one.”
You chuckle, eyes flickering over his features. He does look like a rabbit in some ways, you note. You hesitate. “Is he getting better?”
“He’s in remission. But the doctors want him to stay just in case still..” Jaemin traces the edge of the throw blanket with his finger, staying quiet for a moment before his shoulders slump. “You know, sometimes, I hate volunteering. It just fucking sucks to see all these kids with so much potential spend their entire lives stuck in a white cell. It just, I don’t know, it just really sucks that I want to help so badly, but I can’t do anything about it. I get these second thoughts about becoming a pediatrician because what’s the point if I can’t help people?”
“That’s not true.” You shake your head, reaching over to place your hand over his. “You’re working your butt off shadowing doctors and studying to help people. You spend extra hours on top of that just visiting all the kids. You help Andy. You helped Chloe, Alex, Sam, literally all of the kids that you spent time with. They absolutely adore you, and you make them happy. And don’t deny it because I’ve seen all the crayon drawings they made for you taped up on your walls. You’re a kind person, and you make people feel loved and cared for, Jaemin.”
A hint of a smile sweeps across his face as he lets your words settle in his heart. He carefully turns his hand over to wrap his fingers around yours, squeezing your hand gently before letting go. A silent thank you.
Jaemin continues to ramble on about his classes after that, and you listen, adding in a few words here and there. You haven’t felt at peace like this in so long. It reminds you of when things weren’t as complicated. It feels like the calm before a storm.
You’re standing in the eye of the hurricane.
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xii. he loves me, she loves me not.
Yeeun and Giselle refuse to let you wallow around in your misery and continue to eat your weight in xxtra flamin’ hot Cheetos as you go in a downward spiral of watching every single episode of every trashy TLC reality show possible for a third week. They love you to death, but there’s only so much they can take of “Say Yes to the Dress” and “Extreme Cheapskates” before they want to smash the television. Your friends force you into a casual, but still cute, little red mini dress and your black boots so you can stomp on the shackles of patriarchy and dumb boys. You reckon it’s time to swap out those artificially bright red cheesy puffs and drink your weight in alcohol tonight instead.
“Okay, we can’t be late, especially since I’m dating the host.” Yeeun ushers you and Giselle towards her car, and you situate yourself into the passenger seat, while your other friend sprawls out in the back.
“I still can’t believe you’re actually dating someone,” you comment, leaning your arm against the door and resting your head in your hand. “Guess we gotta pour one out for all the boys whose hearts you broke with that couple post.”
“You know, I think I saw Chris cry a little in the back of the lab today,” Giselle chimes in, tapping her finger against her chin, and Yeeun laughs, starting up the car and pulling out onto the street, “Oh my god, you guys, that was a one time mistake.”
“A mistake lasting three months. I still can’t believe you called him the wrong name before,” you giggle, and she splutters, hitting the brake pedal a little too hard at the next red light.
“Okay, he didn’t hear me though. My face was in the pillow.”
“Mm, no, he definitely heard you,” Giselle cuts in, “I did a little experiment and pretended to forget his name. I called him Kevin, and he reacted so fast, I thought he was gonna get whiplash.”
“Well, shit.” is all Yeeun can say as you and Giselle start to laugh hysterically. It feels nice to laugh like this again, like you were your old self before feelings got involved and all you cared about was if the cute boy in your Managerial Accounting class was single and ready to mingle (spoiler alert: he was). It feels like everything might be okay again.
“What about you, babe?” Giselle starts, and the casual little pet name strikes a chord in you. “Is tonight only a drunk night or a fuck night?”
“Screw it, let’s go with fuck,” you firmly decide, finally making up your mind and vowing to commit to it, and the girls cheer. “I deserve to get good dick tonight.”
“Hell yeah you do!” Yeeun exclaims, and Giselle nods vigorously in agreement with a fist pump and supportive battlecry. “Jennie would be proud. Fuck boys. Both literally and figuratively. Fuck Jeno for breaking your heart.”
You nod your head wordlessly, choosing to stay silent and not tell her that it was the other way around. Hearing his name leaves a bittersweet taste in your mouth, and you quietly listen as your friends continue to curse out every aspect of the male specimen.
When you arrive at Greek Row, Yeeun is lucky enough to find a nearby parking spot, and the three of you hurriedly make your way to the Gamma Omega Tau house. The signature red cups are already strewn across the front lawn, and you’re pretty sure you see Yangyang vomiting in the bushes as some poor girl pats his back. A beer pong table had been set up out front as well, and when you enter the house, you can still hear Yukhei whooping loudly over Cardi B. advertising her WAP, no doubt winning another game with Jackson.
Yugyeom appears, and you wave Yeeun off when she gives you a worried glance, even giving her a thumbs up before she’s whisked away by her boyfriend. Giselle sighs enviously, looking at them before they disappear in the dancing crowd. “God, sometimes I want a boyfriend so bad, but then, I’m like, ‘Do I actually want one or am I just bored’, you know?”
“Yeah, I get that. It usually goes away the next day once you hook up with someone,” you say, and she hums in agreement. Her eyes scan the room until they land on one boy in particular. “Oh god, Dejun is here.”
You furrow your eyebrows. “What’s wrong with him?”
“He and Karina have some beef going on, and I don’t want to listen to another whole spiel about it.” Her eyes grow bigger when she sees him coming this way. “Okay, yeah, I gotta dip. I’ll be in the pool room. Don’t tell Dejun.”
With that, she nimbly slips her way through the tightly packed bodies and makes her escape. A few seconds later, Dejun shows up by your side. “Hey, wasn’t Giselle just here?”
“Uh, yeah, she needed a drink though.” You clear your throat, hoping he won’t see through your lie. He huffs in exasperation, shoving his hands in his pockets.
“I wanted to talk to her about something. Can you believe that Karina had the audacity to—”
“Y/N!”
You make sure to thank the heavens for sending you a savior in the form of— you squint your eyes to make out who called out your name from across the room before they widen in surprise—Na Jaemin.
He makes his way over to you, throwing an arm over your shoulder, before he addresses the other boy. “Hey, you don’t mind if I steal her for a bit, right? Thanks, man.”
Jaemin tugs you away before he can protest, and you find yourself in the kitchen, which is surprisingly devoid of anyone. He pours a mix of sodas and cheap whiskey into a cup, offering it to you. You accept it, taking a huge sip of it before wrinkling your nose. The mixers do a poor job of covering up the whiskey, and Jaemin laughs at your reaction, emptying the rest of the alcohol straight into his mouth.
“So what’s up?” You raise the plastic cup in a mock toast towards him before taking another sip. Yep, just as awful as the first taste, but the burning sensation down your throat becomes a little more bearable.
“I just… wanted to check up on you. How are you doing?” he says, tossing the empty bottle into the nearby recycling can. Hey, saving the environment is important, and it’s always good to remember the three R’s: reuse, reduce, and recycle. But make sure not to apply that to all rubbers, of course.
“I’ve… been better, I guess. It’s just one of those days.” You shrug and dump half of the contents of your drink into your mouth.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Jaemin watches you, tilting his head to the side as he finally breaks the silence, and you shake your head, finishing off the rest of your drink. “I came here to not talk about it.”
“Okay.” He pauses before reaching out to lightly touch your elbow. “Do you want to dance with me?”
You don’t say a word, but you reach up and lace your fingers with his, pulling him out to where the bass is pounding the loudest. Now face to face, you pull him even closer, and he places his hands on your hips. It feels foreign, but you shove that feeling away, just like you always do.
“You don’t seem happy,” he notes, leaning forward to speak closer to your ear in order to be heard. His breath tickles the shell of your ear, and you shiver slightly. You can smell faint traces of his cologne, freshly baked cookies, and whiskey.
You redirect the conversation, slipping your arms around his neck. “How’s everything?”
The underlying question is clear to Jaemin. How’s Jeno? He quickly maneuvers you around to avoid Yukhei who has suddenly barraged through the packed living room, like a crazed linebacker. The two of you are pressed up against each other now, and Jaemin looks down at you through his pretty eyelashes, studying your features with a softened gaze.
“He’s… been better. But he’ll live. He’s in the engineering lab right now, working late on his senior project. He’s almost done with his prototype, and—”
You kiss him.
It’s instinctive and impulsive, but something inside you snaps, and you can’t bear to hear him talk about Jeno anymore, so you do the first thing that comes to mind. Jaemin is caught off guard and freezes up for a few moments before he hesitantly kisses you back. His hands squeeze your waist gently before one goes up to cup your face in the exact way you like. But it feels all wrong. You card your fingers through his hair, slot your body against his, and press your lips against his harder and harder, desperate to feel something else, anything else.
But you don’t.
“Y/N.”
Breathing out your name, Jaemin pulls away from you, pupils blown wide, as he stares down at you, his parted lips red and swollen. He’s a pretty sight to see. A pretty mess, just like you. It’s like one of those Monet paintings that look stunning until you come closer and ruin the masterpiece. You lean forward and attempt to close the distance again because maybe the second time will be a charm, or maybe the third or fourth, but he leans back, shaking his head as his grip on your waist loosens.
“Y/N, Y/N, stop. You're crying.”
His fingers tenderly brush away the tears that have unknowingly fallen and stained your cheeks. You feel the teardrops sliding down now, wetting your skin, and Jaemin silently thinks your eyes still look beautiful, all starry and shining. He pulls you close and lets you cry into his shoulder, and you clutch onto the fabric of his shirt like a lifeline. He tucks you inside his oversized jean jacket, letting you hide from the world and remove the carefully crafted, brave persona you’ve been putting on for the past few days, months, years. You’ve nearly forgotten what the world outside of the fences you’ve built is like.
Pushing his way through the crowd, Jaemin brings you out to the back, hugging your figure to him as the two of you stand on the back porch, the loud music now muffled as are the boisterous shouts and conversations from your peers inside. You press your face into the crook of his neck and let him hold you, enveloping you in a comforting embrace as the tears stream down your face. He holds you for as long as you want—as long as you need.
You want to stay like this forever. But you can’t.
Inhaling sharply, you harshly wipe away the tears with the palms of your hands, no doubt smearing your makeup away, but you can’t care less. Jaemin has already seen you at your lowest before.
“Jaemin, I fucked up.” Your voice cracks. “I’m fucked up.”
“Hey.” He grabs your shoulders gently. “Don’t talk about yourself like that. You’re not fucked up.”
You attempt to give him a watery smile, but end up hiccuping. “But it’s true. I can’t—I don’t know how to stay. I don’t know how to let anyone in. I don’t know how to trust anyone. I don’t know how to be someone capable of being loved. I don’t, I don’t know how to love. I don’t know if I can. But I want to, I want to so badly, but I just—I just can’t. Something is wrong with me.”
“Nothing is wrong with you,” Jaemin says firmly, staring directly into your eyes, and for a moment, you almost believe him. His voice grows quieter. “You’re not fucked up. You are capable of love. You are capable of loving. You wouldn’t be feeling this way if you weren’t. You wouldn’t be out here if you didn’t love him.”
Your eyes waver, and Jaemin gingerly reaches out to cup your face, keeping his steady gaze on you. He feels like an anchor amidst the hurricane, and you hold on tightly, terrified of spiraling away even farther. He holds you together as you fall apart, keeping you from self destruction: the green light on the other side.
“Y/N, you are worthy of being loved. Your family loves you. Your friends love you. Yeeun loves you. Giselle loves you.” Jaemin pauses, hesitating for a few seconds.
“Jeno loves you.” I think I love you.
At the mention of his name, you hate how your eyes start to fill with tears again, and you harshly blink them away. “He shouldn’t. I don’t deserve it.”
“Everyone deserves to be loved.”
You shake your head vehemently in silent protest, curling your hands until your fingernails create small crescent shapes in your palms, until you finally feel something through this numbness even if it’s a little pain. Jaemin reaches out and carefully unfurls your fists, squeezing your hands gently.
“Y/N, you deserve love. You might feel like you’re someone who isn’t worthy of love, but doesn’t that just mean you should try to become someone who you believe is worthy of love?” He smiles softly at you.
“Don’t you want to try?”
Jaemin catches a stray tear that manages to slip through your eyelashes, thumbing it away gingerly. It sparkles under the moonlight, like a diamond in the inky night sky that will always be out of his reach no matter how hard he tries. So this is how it feels to want something—someone—you can’t have, he muses, a foreign feeling settling in his bones, in between the cracks of his rib cage until it curls around his heart like poison ivy. The stars twinkle mirthlessly. They are his silent witness when he finally understands. This is what heartbreak feels like.
You take a breath, inhaling slowly, then exhaling. Jaemin stares at you so earnestly, holds you so delicately, and says those words so fiercely that maybe, just maybe, you start to believe him.
You’re terrified, absolutely petrified. You don’t know if you can ever become that someone. You’re still scared that it’ll hurt, that you’ll lose everything, that you’ll lose yourself if you let yourself love someone, that your worst fear will be confirmed. But you realize that you want to. You want to try. You want to try for yourself.
But you also want to try for Jaemin.
Because he believes in you even when you don't believe in yourself. Because you trust him right now more than you have ever trusted in yourself. Because it’s not as scary when he’s holding your hand. Because he gives you the courage to not be so afraid. And one day, you hope that you’ll be able to prove to him that it wasn’t all for nothing.
“Jaemin...”
You call his name so sweetly, and he’s reminded of a distant memory from sophomore year when you sat across from him at the kitchen table, eyes sparkling and a stack of pancakes nearly toppling over in front of you. That was the first time he made pancakes for someone, other than himself or his friends.
That was the first time he tried.
“Jaemin,” you repeat his name, and he hums in acknowledgment. He waits for you patiently. You draw in a shaky breath. It’s now or never. You have to do this when you have the courage: the courage to stay, the courage to trust, the courage to love, the courage to take the first step.
“I want to try.”
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xiii. plastic hearts can break, too.
[ 4:23 p.m. ] you: can we talk pls?
[ 4:47 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: I’m free after my aerodynamics class
[ 4:48 p.m. ] you: cavanaugh hall in 15?
[ 4:59 p.m. ] catboy 🐈: ok
You wait anxiously, sitting on one of the benches in a more secluded area, and cross your legs, your knee bouncing up and down slightly in trepidation. The vines overhead and trees have already lost all their leaves long ago, leaving empty twigs waving aimlessly in the wind. The chilly air bites your nose, tracing its icy wisps against your cheeks, and you shiver slightly.
Jeno’s figure approaches the area, and you wave awkwardly, catching his attention. He walks over to you, one hand clutching onto the strap of his backpack tightly. Stiffly, he drops his bag on the ground, taking a seat beside you before staring down at his clasped hands.
“Um, hi,” you start, nervousness blooming in your stomach. “How have you been?”
“Fine,” he says shortly, crossing his arms across his chest. He still doesn’t relax, sitting on the edge of the bench with his back straightened. “What did you want to talk about?”
“I kissed Jaemin.”
Your confession hangs in the air, suspended like tiny pieces of glitter in a snowglobe. The boy next to you stiffens up, squeezing his hands into fists, and your mouth goes dry. You lick your lips before continuing, “I’m sorry, it was an impulsive thing, a stupid thing to do, an—”
“I know.”
You stare at him, mouth open. “You… know?”
Jeno slumps in his seat, unfurling his fingers as he turns and finally looks at you for the first time since that night, tired eyes gazing back at you. “I know. Jaemin told me.”
“He told you?” you repeat, still trying to process everything all at once, and he nods. He sits in stony silence until his face crumples, and his voice grows smaller, but you still hear it, your heart cracking a little more.
“Why?”
You hesitate, wavering between every single answer in the book to absolutely nothing at all. Why did you do it? You never thought about it. Sometimes, you just simply do things without determining the consequences. But the underlying reason is there when you dig deep down into the farthest crevice of your soul.
“Because I was scared,” you answer honestly, and this time, he knows you’re telling the truth. Jeno knows you better than anyone else after all. “Because I don’t know what to do when someone loves me. I don’t know what to do when I love someone. When I love you.”
Jeno’s eyes widen at that, and you give him a small smile, pulling at your sleeves to cover your hands. “I’m scared because that means I’m letting you in. I’m scared because I want you to stay. I’m scared because that means you can choose to leave whenever you want to, and I can’t do anything about it.
“So I always choose to leave first. To run away before the other person does. But because of that, I don’t know how to—how to love someone. I didn’t know what it felt like. But then you came along.”
Jeno doesn’t say anything, but you know he’s listening carefully. You pull your legs up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them as you look straight ahead, gazing at the one lone flower that has still managed to survive and bloom on the magnolia tree.
“You were—you were unexpected. You were relentless. You never gave up. You were fearless. You surprised me with your funny texts, your corny pick up lines, your cat pictures, your earnesty, your honesty… You really made it so easy to fall in love with you, Jeno.”
You chuckle quietly, “I didn’t even know I was falling in love with you until it was too late. I didn’t know what to do. I felt like I was suffocating, and I couldn’t stay. I didn’t know how to stay without falling apart. So I ran. I did a bunch of stupid things to pretend that my feelings didn’t exist. If I don’t acknowledge it, then maybe it isn’t there. Maybe it’ll go away.
“But it didn’t. It just grew bigger and forced me to acknowledge it. When I kissed Hyunjin, I wished it was you. God, I wished it was you so badly. Did you know that? But I’m a coward, and I couldn’t face my feelings because I wanted to protect myself.
“Isn’t it so fucked up that we go around breaking other people’s hearts when we’re so afraid of our own being broken?” You laugh humorlessly. “I’m a selfish coward. I didn’t want my heart broken.”
“So you broke mine instead,” Jeno says bitterly, shoving his hands into his pockets, and you nod, the lump in your throat growing bigger.
“Yes, I did. I thought that meant, in some messed up way, that mine was safe. That I wouldn’t be able to get hurt if I pushed you away. That my feelings would go away, and everything would go back to the way it was. So I kissed Jaemin to prove to myself that everything was the same again. But of course, it wasn’t. It never was to begin with. And I ended up breaking not just your heart, but mine, too.”
“I didn’t know what it was like to be in love.” You draw in a quivering breath. “But I also didn’t know what it was like to be heartbroken. All I knew was that it hurt so fucking bad.”
“And all I could think of was you,” you say softly, and his breath hitches in his throat. “I hoped to god that it didn’t hurt this much for you. That’s when I realized I love you.”
“That's what love is, right? Thinking of the other person and putting them before you, being selfless and unafraid, letting someone else hold your heart and trusting them to not break it.” Your eyes water, but you attempt to harshly blink the tears away. You swallow hard. “Jeno, I’m sorry for being selfish. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry I’m not ready to love you.”
Your eyes fill with unshed tears before you squeeze them shut, inhaling shakily. “But I’m trying. I’m trying so hard to be someone deserving of love, someone I’m proud of—someone I love. I don’t know how long it’ll take… but I’m trying.”
You clasp your hands together, twisting and turning the rings on your fingers, as you bow your head slightly, eyes trained on the golden loops—on the gold chain around your wrist, the tiny initial dangling and catching the faint sunlight. You take a deep breath, exhaling slowly. You don’t expect a response from him, but he carefully reaches out and places his hand over yours, curling his fingers around yours.
“I know,” he answers softly at last. Jeno speaks quietly, barely above a whisper, just for you to hear before the wind scatters his words.
“I believe in you.”
When Jeno leaves, you choose to sit there for a little longer. You are alone, but you no longer feel lonely.
The right person at the wrong time, when someone is ready and someone is not, when you both fall in love a little too hard, a little too fast, and a little too soon, it is still love, is it not? For him, it is love. For you, it is love. Yet sometimes, love on its own isn’t always enough for someone to stay. It slips through your fingers like sand in an hourglass. You can try to pick it up over and over again, but it becomes a relentless cycle of the grains of glass escaping between your desperate grasps, akin to two hands of a clock chasing each other round and round.
In another lifetime, in another universe, where another you and another him exists, perhaps they are in love. In someplace where there was never any fear, never any hurt, never any doubt, never any hesitation, there may be a you and a him who fall in love and stay in love. You hope that’s true. You hope that there’s a happily ever after for you and him somewhere out there—that there’s a time where both of you are ready. It might not be now, it might not be here, but you hope there was, there is, there will be.
In this moment, there is love. There is love, but it is breaking both of your hearts. There is love, but it is time to let go.
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xiv. where flowers bloom, so does hope.
Time is the universe’s greatest healer.
Time allows for you to discover things about yourself that you found difficult to acknowledge in the past, allows for you to examine the mistakes you made, allows for you to grow and flourish as you learn to love these imperfections. You learn to shed the facade you've been cowering behind and become comfortable in your own skin. You create your own fire, instead of relying on another person’s warmth every night. Trials and tribulations dot your personal journey, but you are not alone in carrying the weight any longer as you allow your friends into the garden you painstakingly nurture. They plant seeds that take the place of what was lost and rebuild the broken fence with the addition of a gate, and you join them, sowing some of your own and tending to these flowers until they bloom into something ethereal and beautiful.
Time teaches you how to care for and love yourself, rather than simply exist in this body of yours. Time extends a hand to you, pulling you forward, when you feel yourself slipping back into the steep ways of the past. Time pieces together the broken fragments and glues them back together, making them stronger, making them wiser, making them braver, making them whole, making hearts that are ready to love once more.
Fiddling with the familiar breakfast charm dangling from your phone, you sit on the bench beneath the blooming wisteria vines, gazing at the magnolia tree with all its pretty flowers nearby. The petals all sway in the light breeze, and you admire the pinpricks of sunlight filtering through in between the shade.
“Hey, sorry, I’m late, Professor Chung returned our midterms today, and I stayed back to ask a few questions,” Jaemin says breathlessly, appearing by your side. You smile at him, standing up from your seat and slinging your bag over your shoulder.
“No worries, I was enjoying the view here anyway.” Shoving your phone in your pocket, you take notice of his reddened cheeks, and the corners of your lips quirk into another smile: a teasing one this time. “Did you run here?”
“Well, yeah, I didn’t want to make you wait,” he sheepishly admits, flushing slightly. “Do you wanna drop off your bag at your place before we go?”
“Nah, it’s alright, that’s out of the way, and I’m fine with carrying it.” The two of you start the walk towards your beloved drink shop. Jaemin hesitates before tentatively saying, “My place is on the way. We can drop off our stuff there, but…”
You catch the lingering tone and insinuation as he trails off, and your heart softens when you realize his consideration. Jaemin gnaws on the inside of his cheek, mistaking your silence as his blunder, but then you smile at him, nodding in agreement.
“That’d be great! Is Jeno there? I wanna ask him how his second date went. He seemed really nervous about it, but I really think they’re good together.”
“Wait,” Jaemin chokes, eyes widening as your words finally register in his brain, and he halts. “You know Jeno’s going out with Sei?”
“Of course I know. He’s been texting me for help this entire time.” You pause and turn back when you realize Jaemin is no longer walking side by side with you. “What’s wrong?”
“I just— you and Jeno, I thought—” he splutters, all thoughts flying out of his mind in a whirlwind, before he places his hands on your shoulders, peering into your eyes intently. “Wait, are you okay? How are you feeling? If you want to go print out pictures of Jeno and rip them up, that’s completely valid, and I support you, even if he’s my best friend.”
You laugh at that last sentence before you gently place your hands on top of his, squeezing them lightly. “I’m fine, Jaemin, really. It’s been over three months. Sometimes, things just don’t work out, but we’re both in a better place right now. Even if it means our feelings aren’t the same anymore.”
“But he still sends me cat pics, so that’s all that really matters anyway.” You add on as an afterthought with a small chuckle. Jaemin still searches your eyes for any underlying meaning, but this time, he finds none. Your eyes shine bright, and you give him a reassuring look. He lets go of you with a relieved sigh, resuming the walk with you by his side.
“So does this mean you might want to venture into the scary dating world, too? Find someone to grow old with and have a white picket fence house and three dogs with?” he says jokingly, hoping you don’t pick up the way his heart starts beating faster once the question slips from his mouth.
“Yeah, I do.”
Your honest response catches him off guard, and Jaemin almost stops in his tracks for a second time today, but he catches himself as his breath hitches in his throat.
“Oh? You found someone? Do I know them?” He clears his throat, and you hide a smile.
“You do know them very well actually.”
His heart stutters in his chest, but he steadies his voice. “Ah, is it Renjun? I know you said you had classes with him. Art, right? Or maybe Yukhei? You called him cute before. Or that dude in your finance class, Sungchan? What about—”
“Jaemin,” you cut him off gently before he shakes his head, babbling on, “No, let me guess! Is it that grad student, Eunwoo? Or your TA, Jungko—”
“Jaemin,” you interrupt him again, much more firmly this time, but he still pays no attention, rambling on until you grab his hand. Almost immediately, he shuts up, freezing up on the spot as his eyes zero in on your fingers wrapped around his.
“You’re holding my hand.” His voice is barely above a whisper as he stares at your interlocked hands in awe. His head whips up to look at you, eyes filled with childlike wonder. “Why are you holding my hand?”
“Because…” You hesitate, your heart seizing up in your chest. Standing here on the line between love and friendship, you tremble. Fright and courage both run in your veins, and your first instinct may be to run, but your second instinct is to stay. Your final instinct is to take the leap. You’re not quite ready to take the big jump this time. For now, it’s a small one, but you take it.
“Because I like you.”
His heart stutters in his chest, and Jaemin’s eyes grow wide, jaw becoming slack. “You like me? As in like-like me?”
“I like-like you. A lot.” You give him a timid smile. “I think I've always liked you, maybe since freshman year, but it took me this long to figure it out. But Jaemin, I really, really like you.”
He’s speechless, and you bite your bottom lip as you wait for him to respond. The bundle of nerves grows in your stomach until you can’t keep quiet anymore, piping up nervously, “So, um, will you go on a date with me?”
“Yes,” he breathes out. His eyes search yours, and it seems like he found his answer. Heart pounding in his chest, Jaemin laughs a little breathlessly in disbelief, replaying your confession in his head over and over again. You like him. You like him back. He wants to shout it from the rooftops and wear his heart on his sleeve, shirt, pants, heck, even his socks, just simply everywhere.
“So… does this mean I can take you on dates and hold your hand again and kiss you whenever I want, and you’ll call me yours?”
He fails to suppress the smile growing on his face, and your own face grows warm at his bold question, but you confirm it with a shy nod. He pulls you into his chest, unable to hold back any longer, wrapping his arms around you tightly because he finally can. You slip your arms around his neck, embracing him as you bury your face in the crook of his neck, lips quirking up into a smile of relief and happiness.
So this is how it feels to want someone and to be wanted, he muses, a foreign but welcomed feeling settling in his bones, in between the cracks of his rib cage until it blossoms around his heart like a garden in spring. This is how it feels to be yours.
And this is how it feels to be his. This is how it feels to accept love. You decide that it’s a rather pleasant feeling, one that’s not at all scary—never when it comes to Jaemin.
“Say it again please. Say you like me,” he murmurs, just to make sure he isn’t dreaming. You tilt your head up slightly to meet his gaze, reaching up and interlocking your fingers behind his neck as you proudly proclaim:
“Na Jaemin, I like you so fucking much, pancake ass and all.”
Laughing gleefully, Jaemin beams at you, eyes crinkling in the corners and positively sparkling. “You know what? Just this once, I’ll let that booty comment slide.”
“Because you know it’s true.”
“It’s not!”
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xv. breakfast at tiffany’s jaemin’s.
“This is my secret pancake recipe, and only you and I know it, so you have to guard it with your life.”
You’re standing in front of the stove, one of Jaemin’s old T-shirts draped over your figure, the long hem barely letting the borrowed pair of boxers you’re wearing peek out from underneath it. Holding the spatula in one hand and grasping the frying pan’s handle in the other, you wait patiently for the pancake to cook as Jaemin hovers around you, gripping onto the empty batter bowl.
“I solemnly swear on your pancake booty that I won’t tell a soul about your recipe. Not even Giselle, who’s been trying to bribe me with green tea Kit Kat’s and boba for the past few months.”
Letting go of the pan’s handle, you playfully swat his behind for good measure as he turns to put the bowl in the sink. Whipping back to face you, he scowls, stomping his feet childishly as he whines, “My butt is not flat! It’s small, but it’s there!”
“You’re right, I’m sorry, your butt gives Kim Kardashian a run for her money,” you concede, and he laughs loudly, satisfied with your response. Jaemin wraps his arms around you, his hand enveloping yours as he helps you expertly flick the pan to flip the pancake. Your little gasp of excitement when it lands perfectly has him breaking out into a grin, and he nuzzles his nose against your hair before resting his chin on your shoulder.
“Tomorrow morning, I’m cashing in on that waffles offer you gave me. And I expect the full culinary experience. I’m talking about having your hand on my hand and helping me whisk the batter and crack eggs, and you have to kiss me all the time because my apron says so.”
You burst out laughing, and he sulks for a moment until you finally agree. This is the happiest you have ever felt. You turn your face slightly to look at him, eyes gleaming like all the stars from that fated night, and Jaemin smiles back at you, leaning over to press his lips against yours tenderly. Your heart beats faster than ever and louder than ever, but you aren’t as scared as you were six months ago.
Falling in love isn’t as terrifying as you thought anymore. Not when you’re not alone. Not when someone is there to catch you. Not when it’s with Jaemin. After all this time, he’s still the one who believes in you, the one who patiently waited, the one who selflessly stayed, the one who fiercely loves. With him, you never had to pretend. He’s seen you at your lowest and your highest, your best and your worst, the good and the bad. You’ve bared every single ugly, vulnerable side of yours to him.
And yet, he chose to stay. He stayed from the beginning, and he’ll stay until the end. He chose to love you. He chose you. There are over seven billion people on earth, and you know that they don’t all have to want you, to love you, but you managed to find someone who does. You found someone who wants you, someone who loves you: someone you love in return.
Love is not a feeling; love is a choice. Feelings are fleeting and ever-changing, but you will always choose Jaemin. Because that’s love. It is choosing to push through the adversaries and hardships together, rather than taking the easier route and walking away. It is choosing each other yesterday, today, tomorrow, and for all the days of your lives. It is choosing to stay. It is choosing to try.
And everyday, you want to try for him and for you. Because that’s what you do when you love someone—whether it be yourself or someone else. You try everyday to become a better person: to become someone who loves and is loved. It’s a long journey ahead, but he believes in you. You believe in you. And one day, you’ll be ready to say those three little words to him.
But for now, for you and for him, this is enough.
The green light at the end of the road, the anchor in the middle of a hurricane, the glimmer of hope that bursts into bright flames, you are no longer afraid. He makes you feel safe, invincible, and even if nothing else is certain and the world is ending, you know you’ll be okay with him by your side. Because you’ve found your way home.
Home. They say that is where the heart is, and you’ve given yours entirely to Jaemin. You feel at home when you’re with him, and that thought alone makes flowers bloom in your chest.
So this is how it feels.
So this is love.
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Y/N’s unofficial guide on how to be the best girlfriend:
1. have fun. 2. never forget to cuddle when you stay the night. 3. kisses in exchange for pancakes is always a good deal. 4. hook up with your boyfriend once (and many more times afterwards, but who’s counting?). 5. fall in love with a boy named Na Jaemin.
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author’s note :: this is the true ending i had in mind, but for an alternate ending: pussy (un)blocked, please go back to where flowers bloom ♡
3K notes · View notes
notnctu · a year ago
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switchin’ lanes - l.jn | ridin’ club
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━ welcome to the ridin’ club smut series 
genre ➠ slow burn, smut, pwp???, fluff (if u squint) wordcount ➠ 8.3k details ➠  fem!reader, streetracer!jeno, badboy!jeno, college!au,  ━ where you and jeno are in a relationship, but not with each other. warnings ➠ explicit language, cheating, flirty banter, alcohol consumption, drugs, yall at a party, physical fighting (not with you), mentions of cuts/bruises, hickeys, drunk public dry humping, thigh riding, fingering, oral (f/receiving) synopsis ➠ If your boyfriend didn’t decide to join such a stupid unofficial club, then maybe you wouldn’t be in such a sticky situation where Lee Jeno is literally knuckles deep in your sticky situation as he drives you home. Or maybe if your boyfriend actually touched you, then you wouldn’t be seeking it from someone else, who can’t keep his hands off of you. taglist ➠ @rabbit-doyochi ; @darkneogotmyback ; @im-lame-irl ; @p-mini ; @niniluvsmarkhyuck ; @saniahmichael ; @jaehy9ngs ; @danyxthirstae01 ; @jaehyunoos ; @pikijaemin ; @suhweo​ ; @dearlyminhyung​
a/n ➠ hi yall its author doie❀!! i hope you enjoy the series pls leave me feedback lmaoo ill literally take anything. we also hit a milestone for followers and honestly its so crazy to know how quickly this tiny sideblog has grown! we’re so thankful that yall follow us, thank u for lovin us and we will try our best to put out more content!! also through the lens hit 1k notes how is that even possible like wow im speechless thank u for everyone who left such kind comments i treasure every form of feedback :) 
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The heavy double doors of the classroom stare tauntingly at you. The evening setting in, painting the sky with strokes of orange and pink. You managed to remain complaint free the entire day, until your forgetful boyfriend canceled on you because of a club meeting. A meeting for an unofficial club on campus because it is illegal to street race. A club consists of delinquents that are obsessed with cars and steal your boyfriend away from you. 
This is the fifth time this week that your boyfriend stood you up or coincidentally forgot your dates. You can’t remember the last time he physically stood in front of you and not through a phone screen. However, it is not completely the stupid club’s fault that your boyfriend has neglected you. 
He truly is the worst boyfriend ever. He blames everything on his bad memory and does not prioritize you in his life. He loves one thing --- his car. You could be lying in a hospital bed, and he wouldn’t care to check up on you. 
So why did you stay with him? Because you’re scared of being alone? Possibly, but it is a can of worms that you did not want to open just yet. Sex is definitely not the reason you stay with him. He hasn’t touched you sexually since the first and now, last time you two slept together. 
You try your best, to only be waved off with a yawn. He doesn’t compliment you. He doesn’t look at you lovingly. He doesn’t even kiss you for longer than two seconds. You are a toppling tower, ready to crumble at any given moment.
The anger in your body fuels you as you pull the door open to reveal several men in leather jackets chatting away with each other. One by one, they all begin to lay their eyes on who abruptly interrupted their joyous conversations. Your eyes scan the room full of intimidating men, whose auras cause a shiver to run down your spine.
Your boyfriend is nowhere in sight, given that there are plenty enough guys who have the ability to cover him. You walk into the open space and the entire mood of the room shifts. 
Heavy cologne and a deafening silence fill the air. One particular male, who has been eyeing you the entire time, gets up and walks towards you. 
“Are you lost, baby?” Scoffs and chuckles sparsely cover the corners of the room. The unknown male has a jarring cut on his eyebrow, matching a small bruise on his upper cheekbone. 
“I’m looking for my boyfriend…” Your weak voice trails off from the sudden attractive male intimidation. The tall man peers around the room, crossing his arms.
“If you are this beautiful woman’s boyfriend, please fucking come out now. It’s very rude to keep your girl waiting for you!” Initially, his low throaty shout startles you. A heavy heat falls on your cheeks when you register his choice of adjectives.
The whole room falls silent once more, before your pitiful boyfriend steps out from between two bulkier men. “Hey babe, what are you doing here?” His eyes nervously bounce around the room, a shaky laughter erupting from his gut. 
“Sorry, Jeno. I didn’t mean to cause such a scene. I didn’t even see her come in.”
Like a trigger, you remember your intentions for storming in uninvited. Jeno gauges your flaming reaction to your boyfriend’s apologetic words. He nods, not out of acceptance of the apology, but out of disbelief.
He pulls your boyfriend by the collar of his white shirt and your eye widens at the condescending tone that causes your boyfriend to cower, “I’m not the one to apologize to.” With a careless toss, your boyfriend ends up shaking in front of you.
“Jeno is not the only one you should be scared of.” You whisper angrily to him as the rest of the room continues on with their previous chatter. 
Your boyfriend rolls his eyes, “listen, Jeno’s been arrested before. You don’t want to get on that man’s bad side.” 
Your eyes wander behind your boyfriend’s hunching shoulders, catching Jeno steal peeks at you too. There is no interest in the other rambling male that stands in front of him. He just wants to check you out a bit more. 
He is the hottest person you’ve ever gotten the attention of. You feel flustered, and a bit flattered at his lingering gaze. His brown hair is slicked back messily, giving you more to admire. Jeno is an absolute cliche from a bad boy fanfiction. He is unreal, and the odd chance that he can’t keep his eyes off of you, is also unreal. 
But with a light nudge from a blue haired fellow, Jeno’s eyes peel away from your’s. They exchange a few words, which then propels Jeno to hurriedly put on his slightly tattered leather jacket.
You lick your lips to the sight of his body lines as he stands up to follow his friend, but not without another look back at you. Noticing your stare still on him, he bids you a tiny wave goodbye with a smirk to die for. And like that, he’s gone. 
“Are you listening to me?” Your boyfriend’s voice finally reaches your reality. Your focus shifts to the obviously irritated expression on his face. 
“I guess, I’m not. Don’t fucking stand me up again or I will key your car.” You aren’t actually those kinds of girls, but your boyfriend didn’t take a threat seriously unless it involves his highly treasured car. 
And like Jeno, you also make your exit out of the steamy room. The chilly night brush against your unknowingly hot cheeks. Then, you take yourself to the only unhealthy coping mechanism you can think of: a place of free alcohol and no boyfriend.
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It takes you a few months to completely stop caring about your dying relationship. You figure how easy it is for your boyfriend to do it, so you make the same decision.
He spends his nights with his friends he made from his club, and has totally become a self proclaimed car enthusiast. You lose yourself in copious amounts of cheap alcohol at your local parties and it’s almost like you stop sulking over a man who kisses his car goodnight.
While being alone did not bother you as much as you had been dreading, the sexual frustration is a completely different issue. You are absolutely drooling whenever your eyes find Jeno in the crowds of sweaty bodies.
If there is one good thing that came out of your boyfriend’s membership in that club, it had to be Lee Jeno and a few other notable people who attended the same parties as you.
He became a very close acquaintance, and you had learned some very important names associated with the Ridin’ Club. Na Jaemin, Lee Haechan, and Huang Renjun. But the three could not compare to the kindhearted Jeno that makes butterflies stir in your lower abdomen. 
Over the months, you also had learned rather quickly that your sexually clouded mind had tricked you previously into thinking that Jeno’s stares were full of lust for you. His girlfriend makes it clear that it isn’t the case.
Although you have caught the couple making out several times when trying to use the bathroom, your feverish, impure attraction toward Jeno never calmed down.
“You’re looking very tempting tonight, baby.” Jeno’s beaming eye smile greets you, even after completely undressing you with his gaze. His arms are wide open to embrace your warm body. 
The parties are always too hot to wear a fully clothed outfit. You often settle for a cute tank top and a short skirt to prevent your legs from collecting extra moisture. Jeno, without a fail, shows up in black jeans that clad his lower half, tucked with a simple white shirt. His tattoos and toned arms being on full display for you to admire. 
“Better make sure your actual baby doesn’t hear that.” The loud beats of the music make Jeno’s chuckle almost inaudible, but his expression remains cheerful, as per usual. “Did you get into another fight?” 
The fresh wound cut through his smooth complexion, which will eventually join the rest of his collection of fading scars. He mindlessly grazes over the new bandaging and dramatically winces. Clearly concerned, you grab his hand away from the injury. “Don’t touch it, stupid.”
His smile curves into a sly smirk, as he intertwines your fingers and kisses the back of your hand. “It doesn’t hurt at all.” His chest heaves into a fit of giggles, “just wanted to see you care for me.” 
Groaning, you shake his massive hand off of your’s. “Very funny. I should start charging you for my attention.” 
“Name your price, I got all the money in the world for you.” He winks, while lightly pinching your cheek. You are lying to yourself if you thought you could ever stay away from him. Jeno stirs up a part of you that craves the cheesy nicknames, flirty comments and the undivided attention. 
He motions you to follow him into the mess of people. Almost as if he’s a god, the crowd parts for you two to walk through without unnecessary extra bodies. The fear that settles in many individuals’ chest is understandable.
Like your first impression, Jeno is a complete walking fanfiction trope. He negotiates better with his fists, usually with good reason. The guns of the Ridin’ Club, though, his friends are very much to be feared as well. They will not hesitate to run someone over, if given the heated situation to do so. And most definitely, you can count them to be backing up their fighter, Jeno. 
You had not been mindful before of the chatter that regarded the secret Ridin’ Club. They are notorious for fast paced very illegal races in the middle of nowhere destinations and tempers that aren’t meant to be provoked. Besides their intimidating aura, it melts away after getting to know them.
Lee Haechan, the most annoying brat, but has the strongest, the most loyal bond to his boys. He’s also notably funny, often making you laugh with an exchange of banter.
Huang Renjun, the whiniest and initially quiet boy, but grows to be one of the loudest and will chew you out if anyone dares try engaging in verbal combat. 
Na Jaemin, the flirty playboy who always has a swarm of girls, but the gentlest man with a soft spot for cute things. 
And finally, Lee Jeno, the owner of your nights. He is the friendliest of them all, despite him being the toughest one. While his stare can kill, melting away his layers reveal the warmest heart. Not that Jeno is the only one to show initial interest in you, but he is the most considerate to the people he holds close to him.
He has taken care of you for many drunk nights and watched protectively over your intoxicated figure in the crowds. He makes you feel safe and seen, which are some of the many reasons you are entirely attracted to him.
“(Y/N)!” Jaemin’s scream pierce your ears the moment the blueberry catches your eye. He excitedly nudges the other two boys, who are busy pouring drinks into red cups.
“You’re going to make me spill it, idiot!” Renjun grumbles, but looks up to see your dazzling smile and tremendous excitement. His own smile grows, “so the life of the party finally decided to say hi.”
“Hi, my fanclub. I appreciate the long awaited greeting.” Your over the top, sarcasm causes all of them to chime loudly. Haechan hands you a cup and wraps his arm around your shoulders. 
Jeno joins you at your side and the five of you clink your drinks to the ceiling. A fit of yells over the music and a competition of who can finish first. As per usual, you set your cup down after draining the entirety. The others are still chugging the burning liquid down their throats. 
Haechan coughs after dropping his cup onto the counter. His face is twisted with the most disgusted contour, “I don’t know how you do it, (Y/N).”
“I already drank more than you guys, so it just tastes like water now.” You scream over the loud music. Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun toss their empty cups into the sink. 
At this rate, you are completely blindsided by the effects of the alcohol as your legs give out to gravity. Jeno catches you quickly, holding your elbows and your head is placed on his shoulder. Jaemin chuckles lovingly, before helping Jeno balance you against the island. Your head feels heavy on your shoulders, as the room spins in front of you. 
“You good?” Haechan pats your head gently, whispering close to you.
“I---” You try catching your breath after being winded. “--It’s hitting me now.”
Jeno wraps his arm around your lower waist to draw you close to him, “want to go sit down?” He mumbles into your hair. You nod, Jeno and Renjun supporting your limp body to walk over to the couch.
The dark living room is lit up only by colorful led lights, but it is not enough to make out much of anything. Everyone is in their own world, dancing and socializing within their own selves. The two men set you down on the cushion, but your impulse catches onto Jeno’s wrist before he leaves. Renjun is already lost in the crowd.
“Can I sit on your lap?” You pout cutely, all the shame in your body has been displaced with courage. Jeno’s eyes soften at your sudden request, and kisses the top of your forehead.
“The throne is all yours.” He says as he sits at your side and pulls you on top of his thick thighs. His arm is loosely dangling around your waist, resting on top of your thighs. 
The intimate position causes your mind to wander into dark thoughts. His strong, sturdy legs feel delicious against your clothed core. While you’ve been in this position once before, you could never forget how protected, yet very horny it makes you feel. 
“What’s on your mind, (y/n)?” Jeno’s deep voice brushes against your bare shoulder and you feel his chest press against your back. “You’ve been pretty silent tonight.”
You turn slightly to face him, “if I told you, I’m scared it would ruin things between us.”
“There’s nothing in the world that can hold me back from you.” He is always so quick to spill such alluring words. His soft lips graze lightly on your skin as his sparkling eyes look up at your expression.
All it takes is one more tiny kiss on your arm to get you grabbing his face, drawing him into a steamy, long awaited kiss. Surprisingly, he kisses you back, open mouth and tongue lapping with your’s. His hands reposition your legs to where you straddle him. Your faces dive deeper into each other’s as the kiss continues to intensify.
Jeno’s lips still have a hint of alcohol, but he mostly tastes like mint gum. And they are comparable to a cloud, the softest lips you have ever made out with. It is like kissing pure heaven, completely different from your boyfriend’s two second pecks. Jeno devours you in a needy way, like he’s been waiting to explore the wonders of your lips. 
However, you pull away when you feel the vibration of his phone against your inner thigh, almost like a wake up call. As if all the liquid courage disappeared, you blink back in shock at Jeno’s plump wet lips. The thought of his girlfriend crosses your mind, and maybe slight guilt for your own boyfriend fills your system.
You quickly start getting up from his hot body, “fuck, I’m so sorry..” But his hands pull you back onto him, your legs finding their way open above his thighs again. 
“Don’t be, I’ve always wondered what your lips would taste like.” A smirk, then a hearty chuckle relaxes your contracting nerves at the potential of a ruined friendship. 
“But, your girlfriend..” Your tiny voice trails off and Jeno picks up your chin. His fingers rubbing along your jawline.
His eyes do another lap around your features. He admires your averting shy eyes, your beautiful lips, and how they all come together to make a stunning you. 
There is no doubt in Jeno’s mind that he is very attracted to you. He knew it the moment you barged into the club meeting. You are his type of woman, a good mixture of confident and timidness. You like to have some fun, and aren't afraid to be bold. Not to mention, that you are incredibly hot and every time you flirt back just makes him melt inside.
“She won’t care. She hooks up with people all the time.” It puzzles you, all this time you had been holding yourself back from Jeno because he has a girlfriend. All to find out that the relationship isn’t as serious as you thought it to be.
“I know, it doesn’t make sense. But we aren’t two people to be tied down, but at the same time, we like each other enough to want to stay together.”
Your confused expression causes Jeno to laugh and ask, “what’s the dilemma with your boyfriend?”
Rolling your eyes at the mention of your boyfriend, you sigh, “it’s like we’re still together, but we aren’t at the same time. We’ve abandoned the relationship unknowingly.”
Jeno runs a warm hand up and down your thigh, while he listens intently to you. He nods, grabbing your waist to pull you over his groin. “I’m sorry to hear that.” 
“No, he’s a shitty person and an even shittier boyfriend. We literally haven’t fucked for the past year. I’m practically a virgin again.” His hand automatically gives your thigh a light squeeze.
Jeno’s eyes light up as you quickly cover your mouth out of embarrassment. A devilish smirk raises his cheekbone, and lust clouds his mind. Gauging his reaction, your cheeks turn hot.
“We’ll have to change that, don’t we? My baby must be all kinds of frustrated. Tell me, do you like when I touch you then?” Jeno drops in tempo, usually when he wants to be more intimidating with a deeper voice. 
You clear your throat intending to speak, but you can only nod your head in response. “C’mon, (Y/N). Use your words, like a big girl.” Even with the loud music and continuous chatter, you can hear Jeno‘s taunting whisper. 
His words tickle your collarbone as he runs his lips against your neck. Your heart is pumping rapidly at the turn of events, as if the possibility of having something beyond a kiss from Jeno is more than possible at this rate. 
Jeno enjoys your small whimpers as he marks your neck with purple love bites. Right in the center of the crowded room, Lee Jeno is just casually giving you hickeys.
“Yes, I love that you can’t keep your hands off of me.” 
Almost immediately, you can feel his lips curve into a smile on your skin. Pop! Jeno marvels the darkness against your skin in the mood lighting. A small part of him hopes you do end up seeing your boyfriend sometime soon, so he can see who you really belong to.
“How about we try touching like this?” Jeno pushes you down hard against his pelvis, the veins on his hands becoming evident from the grip and the tiny drawings permanently staining his fingers.
You gasp the moment you feel Jeno’s hip begin to move underneath you to the beat of the song. He rolls your hips rhythmically to match his speed. His clothed hard on can be felt through the only barrier you have on --- your panties.
The thin fabric is soon drenched in your juices after the continuous friction up and down his length. You throw your head back to every bump against your clit, the electrifying feeling enact more of your wetness to puddle. 
You can’t believe you were grinding against Jeno in the middle of a full party, as if his friends aren’t a few feet away. It is a good thing that your skirt pools around both of your waists to conceal the dirty deed underneath.
Jeno’s lip escapes under his top row of teeth as he rubs his clothed length against your barely covered pussy. He can feel his jeans dampening from your wetness and his eyes roll to the back of his head from how the feeling of wanting you consumes his body. He really becomes uncontrollable when it comes to you. 
This is the most sexual activity you have had with another person for over a year. Jeno just looks absolutely heavenly intoxicated with lust, and your mouth waters at how big his cock must be. You can feel his length the harder Jeno rolls against you, and it is definitely bigger than your boyfriend’s. 
You are trying so hard to stay quiet and unnoticeable, but the pleasure seeps out every crevice. Jeno is trained on you as your hand reaches up to cover your mouth, the muffled whimpers escaping your lips uncontrollably.
“I’m so close.” You admit, your body jolting every time his jean button grazes against your sensitive bud.
Jeno moves you over his thigh, forgetting his incredibly hard dick straining in his jeans. As long as you are satisfied, he can care less about his own pleasure. A low scream erupts from your throat when he flexes against you. 
His thigh is much more stable, with more control for consistency. You quickly notice the dark, wet spot on his jeans and you blush even harder. Your underwear clings onto you from the excessive moisture, but Jeno continues to help you finish.
The strands of hair cover your face, but Jeno needs to see your fucked out expression. He is taken aback when you start riding his thigh faster, grinding harder without the aid of his hands.
His mouth hangs slightly open in awe at your neediness, he truly did not know the extent of your sexual frustrations. Oh, but how he is incredibly turned on by you getting off on him. 
“I want you to cum for me, you deserve it.” Jeno brings you in for another passionate kiss. The mixture of his tongue sucking harshly on yours, and the friction on your clit are more than enough to reach your climax. 
Your legs clenched tightly around Jeno’s thigh. The small knot in your stomach that built, drops like the beat playing in the background. The feeling of white is familiar, but it is more intense than when you would touch yourself. You are finally receiving the pleasure from someone else’s touch, someone who wants you to unravel for him.
Jeno pulls away from your lips, kissing down your neck and collarbones as your chest heaves for air. His palm soothes your shaking legs as your climax subsides. You fall into his arms, and he laughs. The reality that you two just did that publicly registers in both of your minds.
Digging your shy face further into Jeno’s shoulder, he whispers lovingly, “let me drive you home.” 
“Are you still drunk?” The muffled question tickles Jeno’s neck.
“I think you beautifully cumming on my thigh sobered me up.” He jokes and you quickly cover his mouth. Your heart practically stops and you hope no one else heard him.
It is silly that you are now self conscious, as if the whole room didn’t just watch you and Jeno grind on the couch. But, the feeling of embarrassment and regret lingers in your stomach. You mentally thank the dark room for concealing both of your identities.
“I’m sorry for your jeans.” A pout begs for forgiveness as you stare at Jeno’s beaming smile. He takes your hand off of his mouth, not forgetting to give your fingertips a lingering kiss.
“I’m sorry for your boyfriend. He doesn’t know what he’s missing.” Jeno parts your hair from your neck, admiring the marks he left on you. A small sense of pride builds inside of him, accompanied by a tiny bundle of possessiveness.
“Let me say goodbye to the boys and I’ll take you home.” 
Nodding, Jeno carefully lifts you off of him and onto the cushion. He leans over to kiss your cheek. As he gets up, you see the darker shades on his jeans from your doing. However, Jeno is completely unbothered and continues to find his friends.
Now that you are alone, you feel a bit nervous that someone would come up to you and talk about what they saw. Checking your phone, your screen blinds you with absolutely no notifications from your boyfriend. Going on social media is worse, as you scroll to see that your boyfriend posted a photo.
It is a photo of his hot, red polished car. He obnoxiously posed squatting next to the front wheel, his lips puckered up and kissing the rims. With a caption that makes every regret in your body disappear, “with my one and only.” 
The phone is tossed somewhere else, wishing to delete the image from your memory. Your eyes wander around the room, when they spot a suspicious man sneakily dropping a small pill in an unattended drink. He, then, looks up and catches your stare. Caught red handed. 
But the male smugly smirks, “you’re going to pretend you didn’t see that, like how half of this room pretended to not see you grinding on Jeno.” 
“You’re complete scum, I can’t believe you just roofied someone’s drink.” You yell in utter disbelief at the unwavering man. His disgusting smirk changes into a menacing smile.
He approaches you, his height allowing him to tower above. You gulp, scared at how he can easily overpower you at any second.
“And what are you going to do about it? What? Jeno didn’t loosen you up enough?” His revolting hot breath beating down your nose, invading every corner of your personal space. 
Before you can find any insult to speak back, his figure goes flying sideways and out of your face. It’d be a lie to not admit your heart skipping a beat at the sight of Jeno’s clenched fists and locked jaw. His sharp gaze watches as the stranger gets up from the ground, inflammation already growing on his left cheek.
“Dude, what the fuck!” He shouts angrily, holding his cheekbone as he winces at the pain. Immediately, the conversations are replaced with gasps, and small whispers at the sight. People gather around the living room to see the commotion. Even you are unsure how to react to the sudden fight.
The other man lunges at Jeno with full force, but Jeno stops him by grabbing the man’s collar, “this,” Jeno punches his lip, busting it open, “is for dropping a roofie in someone’s drink.”
The stranger groans at the impact, but still gets up with a fist straight for Jeno’s gut. Watching Jeno take a blow is much more difficult than you had been expecting.
He crouches over from the punch, but quickly regains his composure to put the man in a headlock. A few more gasps erupt and wonder if you should stop him before he does something unnecessarily stupid. 
“This,” the man squirms to try to get out of Jeno’s iron grip, “is for disrespecting my babygirl.” And with a shift snap, the male falls limp and unconscious.
A surprised intake of air and Jeno peers up at your scared expression. He calmly walks over to you, ignoring the swarm of people that had gathered around the scene. He can only see one thing — you. Jeno’s wandering eyes try to read your expression, but all he sees is a terrified girl.
“I’m sorry you had to see that, are you okay, (Y/N)?” 
Blinking blankly for a few moments, you are mortified at the laying body, “what did you do to him?” 
Jeno looks back at the stranger casually, “I put him to sleep for a bit. He’ll wake up in about 20 minutes.”
A rush of reassurance washes over you knowing that he is alive and Jeno didn’t just kill someone in front of you. You exhale all the anxiousness and nerves, 
“thank you for stepping in.”
“I don’t fight without a good reason. You are more than a perfect reason to fight for.” He pinches your cheek cutely, and his tough exterior fades away yet again. 
His famous eye smile that warms your insides is back as if the scary, intimidating expression didn’t exist a few seconds ago. Jeno’s good sides only appear with you. Nevertheless, you are happy to know how special you are to see them. 
“Violence is never the answer.” He nods, only taking it for a grain of salt. “Are you okay? It looked like stringbean knocked some wind out of your gut.”
The teddy bear thrusts himself forward into a fit of laughter, his head resting on your lap. His melody lights every dark corner inside of you. “He did get a good punch in there, didn’t he?”
His rumbling laughter stops, and he peers up at you. “I can’t believe you were still worried about a complete asshole.” 
Scoffing, you break the shared gaze. “I’m a compassionate human being.” Jeno stands up, extending his hand for you to take.
“I know, you’re the best kind of person.” He genuinely means it with the way his tone remains quite stern, eye contact unwavering. He is revealing more of his intimate parts, and in return, you wish for him to see your’s. 
Silence drowns out all the commotion between you two. Jeno grows shy at the way the galaxies reflect in your stare. “I--” Never once, did you think you would witness Lee Jeno stammer over his words. “I-I, let’s-- I want to take you for a drive.” 
To Jeno, a drive to him is equivalent to your hand in marriage. Even his own girlfriend has never been on a drive with him. It is a big part of his personality, given that he is a crucial member of the Ridin’ Club. However, out of all of them, he is the last one to flaunt his hobby. It is special, almost sacred to his entire being. 
“Me?” It is the dumbest question to ask, but you really want to clarify his intentions. Before this night, you two were barely considered friends. You two never saw each other outside of the late night parties.
But now, Lee Jeno wants to take you on a drive. It makes you wonder if the desire of companionship is mutual, that he too pines to further your relationship.
“I’m not looking at anyone else,” Jeno still waiting for your hand and holding an intense eye contact. His heart lays exposed for you, just right on his sleeve. An innocence paints his usual intimidating aura, “let me show my special girl, what is special to me.” 
He must possess some magic because he knows every way to make you swoon. And like that, your palm meets his and he locks his fingers between yours. 
The moment you enter Jeno’s striking, eye catching car, you automatically relax into the leather seats. His pristine car matches his personality --- simple, but captivating. Your boyfriend’s car is the exact opposite, which is why you never enjoy sitting in it.
Jeno has pieces of himself that scatter his car, like an adorable small plushie that watches out the back window. A beaded lanyard dangles from his rear view mirror. It even matches his scent of a deep ocean breeze.
Unlike your boyfriend’s obnoxious details, Jeno did not have a light up stereo that flashed annoyingly to every beat drop in a song. Instead, a sweet lilac color illuminates at your feet, along with his. 
“You like what you see?” Jeno catches you astonish at the tiny aspects of the interior. 
“Of course, it’s yours. It’s exactly like how I would imagine it to be.” Jeno is proud, hearing you praise his car. Even he can admit, it is a bit weird to be so connected to an inanimate object.
Nevertheless, his car, racing, driving became a huge part of his life. And unlike his friends, he feels rather shy and slightly embarrassed for being such a geek. 
But hearing you actually appreciating the small details of his car when you probably hate every aspect of racing due to your boyfriend’s doing, it makes him feel very happy.
Maybe happy is an understatement, more like overjoy at how you freely can recognize the things that make him content. You respect him, and are mindful that as mundane as a car is, you know that it is something important to him.
Silence becomes the majority of the ride out of the quiet, suburban neighborhood. While Jeno’s eyes remain focused on the road ahead, you are concentrated on him.
He drives with one hand on the wheel as he rests his elbow on the middle console. His eyebrow creases here and there. It is the most normal, mundane activity anyone can do --- drive. That is all he is doing, yet the effect it suddenly has on you can not go unnoticed. 
Abruptly, with the rev of the engine and a press on the gas, the car practically flies on the empty freeway. It catches you off guard, causing you to hold onto the grab handle. Jeno peeks over at your shocked figure, and smiles to himself.
“Relax, (Y/N).” He calls your name, reaching over to rub your thigh as a way to calm your anxiousness. Automatically, your hand grips onto his for support and the other one drops from the handle. 
Exhaling, your eyes are trained ahead. The car is moving so fast that you can’t even make out anything around you. Everything becomes nothing, but colorful streaks against a dark background. The gravity against your chest feels crushing.
“How-- How fast are you going?” 
Jeno glances at the speedometer and intertwines your fingers into his own. “I don’t think I should tell you that, you might actually have a heart attack.” 
The window rolls down and you are hit with rumbling wind, “I know you’re scared right now, so stick your head out the window and take a deep breath.”
You look at him in pure fear, “what?! I can’t even move, let alone stick my head out the window!”
Jeno shakes his head, “trust me. Please, trust me.” He needs you to experience the same thrill he does. His own adrenaline is through the roof, out the entire atmosphere of the vehicle. The amount of joy he is experiencing became tenfold now that you are sitting beside him. 
You trust him and very meticulously, go against the wind. Your hair crazily dances along with the rush and your eyes water from being dried out. Adjusting to the pressure, you also stick your hand out the window. It whips backward, but you feel the wind slip between your fingers.
The rise in heartbeat and excitement pump through your veins. The beauty in the white streaks that create a runway, it is nothing but you and the open space. There is no other way to explore it, except at a high pace. You understand why Jeno loved it so much. 
Jeno bounces between the road and half of your figure out his window. Your eyes are closed initially, before you barely squint open. Tears fly by with strands of your hair, but you start to move your hand to physically feel the thrill pass between your fingers.
Then he sees it in the side mirror: the sweet curve in your lips he loves the most and the wideness of life in your eyes. It only makes him press the gas harder.
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“That was incredible! You should take me riding with you more.” You marvel at him as he starts the route to your place. It is complete playfulness that hints in your tone because you are aware of how sacred these are to him. Nevertheless, a part of you still hopes he agrees to do so.
Jeno nods, “only because I like you,” He pauses, gauging your reaction with his side eye gaze, “a lot.”
Your heart sinks to an unsettling place in your stomach. Jeno could not possibly be serious, however, his tone no longer matches the playfulness of your own. It almost seems like he is telling the truth. But you didn’t want to believe that. 
Your eyes make a full circle before settling at the disappearing sidewalks, “stay in your lane, Jeno.” It is to keep the mood still light, you and Jeno aren’t ones to be serious. 
His hand has been on your thigh for the whole night, whether it be out of habit or comfort. His touch is always welcoming and warm, but suddenly, you feel the small squeeze on your flesh. Turning your attention on his face, you can see how a smirk has grown. 
“But yours seems much more fun.” Immediately, your stomach leaps with somersaults. Your throat gets dry and tight, not anticipating that response. 
“Beside, you can’t act like we both haven’t swerved. It was barely moments ago that you were cum---”
“---No need to further explain.” 
“And I’d proudly do it again.” His voice drops several decibels and his hand slowly snakes it’s way up your thigh. All the while, his eyes still on the road ahead.
You gulp as every heartbeat constricts your throat. Lifting the ends of your skirt higher to expose more, you secretly want Jeno to cause your legs to shake again. “D-Do what again?”
Jeno perks up to the sweetness of curiosity in your tone. He pulls up to a red stoplight, being able to finally look over to your innocent face and needy hands gripping the cute, thin fabric. He stares deeply into your eyes, “make my baby cum.” 
Similarly to the stoplight, you give Jeno the green light to pull your panties to the side. You spread your legs wide as his finger massages your pussy lips. He gets dangerously close to your erect clit, barely skimming over it. 
A needy, yet delicate moan escapes your lips and Jeno’s jaw tightens. He’s more upset that he’s missing the view of your legs spread, open mouth in ecstasy, half lid eyes all in the passenger seat of his car. He hopes for another red light, just so he can peek over at your delicious figure.
“Jeno, please touch me.” Your voice is airy and desperate. He hummed in response, completely withdrawing his hand from your core. However, you catch his wrist and bring it to rest on your inner thigh. “Please.” 
The distinct beg in your tone drives him crazy. As he dips his finger into your sudden wetness, a shiver runs up your spine. Right when he applies minimal pressure on your bundle of nerves, you jolt and close your thighs around his hand.
One touch already feels too good to be true, that finally someone, Lee fucking Jeno, is actually touching your nakedness. Peering down, Jeno’s arm is flexing in between your legs. His veins popping ever so slightly and his tattoos paint his smooth skin. 
“Open your legs, babe.” His low devilish chuckle rumbles in your lower abdomen. “Let me give you the lovin’ you’ve been deprived of.” 
You shudder at his cadence and slowly pry open your legs. Jeno stops at a red light and gets to see your reaction as he rubs you in a fast rhythmic pace. A soft cry yelps from your throat and you have to grip the handle to keep yourself from spazzing out any further. 
Almost like a trance, he doesn’t notice that the light turns green. He’s locked into the sight of your contorting body. Your hips have a mind of its own, yet again, as Jeno feels you rolling deeper into his touch.
“Poor baby, you’re so touch starved that you can’t control yourself.” 
“It feels better when you do it.” You whine, your lip being bruised from your biting. But your eyes notice the green illumination and you blink over at Jeno.
He is practically drooling at the sight of you, his eyes are trained at your needy hips and dripping wet core that soaks his fingers. You stop every urge to steal more kisses from him.
Jeno briefly recovers from the trance and steps on the gas. He takes this opportunity to ease a finger into the core, causing you to exclaim and squeeze around his digit. “Oh fuck, you’re so tight.” 
“More, Jeno.” The way his name rolls off of your tongue makes his heart flutter and his dick to raise in his jeans. Without much hesitation, he slowly slips in another finger and you moan at the stretch. Pumping and curling, he ensures that you are enjoying every action.
His fingers curl against your plushy flesh and your legs spread wider for him to go deeper. You’re a moaning mess when he curls up to your sweet spot, rubbing his fingertips quickly. The familiar queasy feeling builds in your lower regions, and Jeno becomes merciless with his fingers.
He guides them in and out of you, feeling your tightness release and invite him back in. The sloppy wet noises fill the car and drown out the engine. Your half lidded eyes bounce at Jeno’s unbothered figure and the entire scene seems absolutely unbelievable to you.
One hand on the wheel. The other knuckles deep in your pussy. Eyes focus on the road ahead. A comfortable man spread. His hair is messy from the long night.
It is all too unbelievable, that Jeno’s already giving you a second climax of the night when you could barely get one in a year before. And he loves touching you as much as he loves driving. 
However, the guilty raises as fast as the ball of tension in your gut. You two pull up in front of your apartment building, while Jeno’s tugging his fingers against your flesh aggressively. In a split second, you hold onto his wrist to stop him. 
He shifts into park when the car settles into a spot and peers over to you. A curious expression daunts onto him, rather concern that he might have been too much. “I’m starting to feel guilty.” 
Jeno nods, and retrieves his fingers out of your dripping core. The feeling of emptiness causes all the built up pressure to dissipate.
“I understand,” he begins, but pauses at the sight of your sticky juices glistening on his fingers. Your eyes widen as he licks them clean, a soft moan escaping from the back of his throat. 
The small action spikes your heart rate and you rub your legs together. With a pop! Jeno hums delightfully, “baby, you taste so good. I’m a little sad I won’t be tasting more, especially directly from the source.” His lustful eyes glance down at your thighs and back to your profile. 
“I’ll walk you up to your apartment.” He says way too casually, unbuckling his seat belt. A mixture of emotions are running through your head. There is guilt, but lust is too powerful to ignore, especially when it’s Lee Jeno. The damage is already done, right? It’s not like it wasn’t moments ago that you humped him in the middle of a party. 
“Wait,” your hands find themselves gripping onto his leather jacket tightly. Jeno gently reaches over to release your strong grip and replaces the leather with his hand. 
“Yes, babygirl?” Jeno’s round, friendly eyes meet yours. The lust clouded darkness is no longer there. His hand feels hot and somewhat rough. 
“I’m going to break up with my boyfriend, so promise me, you’re not going to dip out of my life afterwards… I don’t need you to be anything more than a friend. I just can’t lose you too.”
He turns around in his seat to face you comfortably. “I don’t think you’ve noticed, but I can’t stay away from you, let alone have the ability to leave you.” He reassures you with a soothing and calm tone. His thumb draws circles around your knuckles. “I’m always going to be your friend, whether or not I know how you taste.” 
“Do you still want to try it … you know, from the source?” You shyly ask, an innocence embodying your gaze and voice cadence.
Jeno raises an eyebrow, a smirk on his lips. “I’d love to, only if you let me.” 
Instantly, you shift to get on your lower back. Jeno watches as you excitedly position yourself open for him and actually finds your eagerness quite adorable. Your left leg bends behind the driver’s seat and your right rests on the dashboard. 
He hooks his arms underneath your thighs to pull you forward towards him and your whole body slides against the leather. With a slow lift, your skirt reveals your drenched panties. Rolling them off and tossing them to the back seat, he lays eyes on your still dripping pussy. Jeno takes a second to admire your flower, this being his first time he’s seen such a private part of you.
“You’re beautiful, you know that right?” He chuckles deeply, before his tongue licks a long strip up to your clit. You exclaim out of the tingling pleasure that seized your insides.
He flattens his tongue against your bundle of nerves, flicking and circling. His finger enters your pussy again, curling up to rub at the same pace he is licking. The pure sight of Jeno’s head in between your legs is enough for butterflies to explode. 
His sole motive is to make you feel good. There is nothing else in the world that he wants at this moment beside pleasure to overtake your body. Jeno eats you out like he hasn’t had a meal in months. His mouth wraps around your clit. The mixture of his flicks and sucks cause electric bolts to run down your legs. 
You get more wet as Jeno pumps his finger in and out of your hole. Your juices are practically dripping onto the interior of the car, but Jeno doesn’t care.
He fucking loves it. He loves the taste of you lingering on his tongue. Your breathless moans. Your waterfall dripping on uncontrollably. The view of you unwinding because of him. Nothing can be more perfect. 
Running your hands through his messy locks, you press him closer into you. A devilish smile draws on his face as he flicks his tongue side to side. “Oh, fuck! I’m.. so c--close.” 
Your back arches upward into Jeno’s mouth, feeling his muscle lick harder and faster on your throbbing clit. He adds a second finger, and the simultaneous stimulation practically throws you into another dimension. The pleasure overtakes your entire lower half, your legs trembling from pure ecstasy as you approach your orgasm.
“Don’t stop, I’m going to---” Then, Jeno pulls away and shoves his tongue into your warmth. A gasp hits the air as he also continues to rub circles on your sensitive nerves. His tongue fucked your pussy incredibly skillfully and deliciously. With this switch, your legs violently shake and try clamping together.
However, his strength holds you wide and open for display. A low grunt follows suit as his dark eyes zone in on your contoured facial expressions. Then, the white light blind you once again and the ball of tension unravels itself on Jeno’s tongue. Squirming and screaming, your hips buck forward on their own. 
It is close to being too catastrophic, this being the most intense orgasm you’ve had after a whole year. Nevertheless, the satisfaction is right on the tips of your toes and you greedily indulge in the euphoric moment. Jeno feels your walls squeeze around his muscle as he laps every last bit of you up.
He is absolutely addicted to your juices, making sure he catches every drop. Finally pulling away, he wipes the extra drip on the back of his hand. Jeno blinks at your raising chest and limp legs. Chuckling, his warm hand massages feeling back into your body.
“Do you want me to carry you back up?” His hoarse, raspy voice wakes you from your post orgasm daydream. You flutter your lashes at him fondly and happily nod at his offer. 
Getting out of the car, Jeno walks over to the passenger side and your arms rest nicely around his neck. His palms support your butt, but also smoothing your skirt over to cover your decency. A poke against your outer thigh makes you realize that Jeno is strained against his jeans.
“I can take care of you too.” You pout cutely at Jeno, but he shakes his head.
“It’s not about me tonight. It’s about you.” Leaving a soft kiss on your cheek, his eyes turn into moon crescents from his lovable smile. The kind, friendliness makes an appearance again.
Or so you think! In a sheer second, Jeno’s deep voice rumbles your stomach and his hooded eyes pierce your soul, “next time though, I’m fucking you real good, babe.” 
You hum in response. Saliva collects in your mouth, already looking forward to more of Jeno. But a chilly draft brushes up your exposed area as Jeno carries you up the flight of stairs.
“Wait, Jeno… I don’t have my underwear on.” The ‘Level 3’ sign is in view as Jeno turns to walk. 
He only laughs and shrugs nonchalantly, “it’s better that way anyways.” Without another word, he continues upward to your floor and you playfully punch his solid chest. In all honesty, that’s not going to be the only time you leave behind your panties in his beloved car. 
Your hatred for the notorious Ridin’ Club subside after such a wild night. If anything, you owe it all to your shitty ex-boyfriend for joining such a ridiculous club. Without him and the club’s existence, who knows if Lee Jeno would’ve still swerve into your lane. 
3K notes · View notes
0097linersb · 6 months ago
Text
I see red
ONE SHOT
Pairings: Jeno x Reader
Genre: Smut (basically pwp)
Word count: 5.1k
Warnings: Jealousy, dom!Jeno, he spits in your mouth at some point, slapping, choking, overstimulaton, edging, the whole deal really, name calling, oral, fingering - This is just pure filth I’m sorry. 
A/N: I also had this saved in my drafts and I’m horny for dom!Jeno Iol I struggle with profreading my own stuff so I’ll try my best to do it tomorrow
You didn’t know what finally set Jeno off.  
Sure, you haven’t been on your best behavior lately but it’s not like it was your fault; Ever since he decided to go on little gym dates with Yubin and just casually mentioned it to you one day, like he was talking about how sunny it was outside and not about how he was hanging out (almost daily) with a super hot girl, alone and in minimal clothing too. You couldn’t even trick yourself with “she’s not his type” because that woman was everyone’s type, damn, she was even your type.
It’s not like you didn’t trust him or felt insecure about yourself - it made no sense, really. It’s like people say: Jealousy is a little green monster that ate your insides and got you to unreason things. You just couldn’t help feeling slightly annoyed, you mean, try knowing your boyfriend is hanging out for hours with a blonde goddess with a six pack AND be happy about it.
So, since he decided to be a pain in the ass, you decided to become what you were born to be: His worst fucking nightmare.
But in all fairness, you didn’t know exactly what tipped him over the edge. It could have been you casually hanging with his roommates in the shortest skirt you could have possibly found, it could be the way you kissed Jaemin (just a small peck) so the boy would stop playing around and annoying the others with his over-the-top signs of affection, it could even be the way you asked Haechan to massage your shoulders because you were in pain but too annoyed to ask your boyfriend for it. He sure must not have liked the way you were dancing with Mark at the party last Friday or how he got home on Monday to you wearing one of Renjun’s shirts - but he was Jeno, of course he said nothing about it. Plus, he knew you better than that.
It didn’t help when Haechan and Jaemin asked what was going on between you two and you shared your boyfriend’s gym adventures, of course you could trust those guys to join in on making their friend’s life living hell. It was just open game then, Jaemin playfully flirting with you and complimenting you whenever he could and Haechan teasing your boyfriend about it.You were always careful to not cross any lines, though. Only doing things that you knew weren’t actually going to upset Jeno and would be perceived by him as one of your little games, which is what they were. You also kept it subtle and spaced out, which is why you were expecting to be playing for a long time, or at least for longer than you did.
Your plans were ruined on Wednesday afternoon, when the black-haired boy came out of the shower to a Na Jaemin pulling you to sit on his lap, his arms going around you to show you how to play the video game. Your boyfriend quietly sat down next to you two, saying nothing and staring deeply at the Tv screen but, the look on his face and his clenched jaw were sending a shiver down your spine.
Damn you for refusing to have sex since you found out about Jeno’s gym buddy, this pent-up frustration was not helping you at all.
Thanks to the distraction that was your boyfriend, you couldn’t focus on the race going on and lost at the easiest level, resorting to whining to Jaemin, who simply patted your thigh in a comforting manner and let out a soft, “It’s ok, baby.”
Your pouting soon morphed into a face of shock and your little fit was interrupted as your boyfriend hastily stood up, groaning a “That’s it. Room, now!”
You looked up at him confusedly but not done with being annoying yet, you decided to try one last jab, sending him a challenging look, “I don’t really feel like it.”
Jeno simply raised an eyebrow at you, his whole aura shifting, making you coward immediately under his cold gaze, “Care to repeat that?”
“I said- Nothing.”
“That’s what I thought. Now, move.”
You repeat what your boyfriend said in a mocking tone but obey, leaving an amused looking Jaemin behind as you wondered where the fuck did all your confidence go to. You really couldn’t keep the character up when Jeno lowered his voice - you liked playing with fire but you weren’t crazy enough to jump in it.
As you entered your boyfriend’s room, your heart was beating like crazy. You felt like a kid again: When you knew you did something wrong and your mother was about to punish you for it. The anxiety did not sit well with you, maybe you should start being nicer to the man.
“Jeno, I-” You tried reasoning as soon as he entered the room, closing the door behind him.
“I don’t give a fuck, sit down.”
Damn.
You were happy to comply, legs getting wobbly as his strict tone had a weird effect on you. You sat on the edge of the bed and Jeno was quick to stand up in between your legs, you tried to look anywhere but at him, but that was proven impossible as his hand softly but confidently grabbed your chin and tipped your head up so you were forced to stare at him like a deer stuck in head lights. You could hear your own pulse throbbing inside your ears. 
Well, no use acting all innocent now, you really did bring this upon yourself.
“Had fun?” He asked, his voice could cut you right open. You didn’t know what to answer, nervous of any extra consequences that may come if you did, but your silence was clearly not accepted as his grip on your jaw tightened, “Speak.”
“Yeah.”
He hummed, eyes slowly skimming over your face as his thumb softly brushed your cheek, “So pretty. Too bad you don’t know how to behave, huh? I think it’s about time for me to put you back in your place, don’t you agree?”
You close your eyes and enjoy the smooth circles he was tracing with his thumb, not sure where he was going with this - your heart was trying to leave this room, though, by the way it kept pounding against your ribcage- but knowing you wouldn’t get a lot of soft moments from this point forward.
“Did you think I would find it cute?” He sternly asked, his tone contrasting with the light touches on your face. He knew your answer to that and you knew he was just playing your cards, and well, it was working.
“No.”
“So you acted like a brat on purpose?” He tried giving you a chance, knowing you really had no way out of your own mess.
“At your service, sir,” You joked as you rolled your eyes, trying to lighten the mood, maybe make the man laugh a bit so he would forgive you.
“Watch it,” He spat out and you kind of regretted saying it when his hand flew to the back of your head, pulling on your hair harshly so you were forced to look up.
Ok, Jeno was mad mad.
His cold expression didn’t faze at the way you groaned in pain, neither did his grip on your hair as he bent down so his face would be right in front of yours as he warned, “You brought this upon yourself. Clothes off.”
You had it in you to fight a bit, but honestly, you were already aching between your legs and curious to know how all of this would unroll. You quickly undressed, leaving your panties on since he didn’t say anything about it, your eyes not leaving the floor as you did it. You then stared at your boyfriend, who was now sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for the next instructions. Jeno simply looked at the place between his spread legs, signing where he wanted you. As you sat down, you noticed the man had placed the full body mirror he owned right in front of you while you were undressing.
Oh, boy.
You two locked eyes through the mirror and he calmly asked, “What’s the safe word?”
And that’s when your brain stopped working, knowing you had really fucked up. Jeno has always been a little bit more on the rough side in bed, even kind of dominant, but never like this. You two had never used a safe word before. He noticed your struggle and suggested in a soft but strict tone, “Is Apple ok?”
“Yeah,” You muttered and he nodded in acknowledgement before harshly forcing your thighs open with his hands, making you gasp. His chest was pressed against your back, but you couldn’t feel his heart hammering crazy like yours was.
Jeno slowly moved his hands higher up your thighs, getting goosebumps to erupt all over your body. He ever so lightly traced one single finger against your clothed slit as he said, eyes still locked with yours in the mirror, “I want you to watch yourself being a slut, maybe then you’ll be embarrassed and learn how to behave.”
You whined, not sure if it was at the tip of his finger barely grazing over your clit or at his words. Honestly, who the fuck was this man?
You could see the wet patch of fabric between your legs in the mirror and Jeno caught you staring at it as his middle finger rubbed slow circles on you, only smirking at you in response, clearly satisfied with the effect he had over you.
It was embarrassing how quickly you were squirming under your boyfriend’s touches; your bottom lip was almost bleeding from how strongly you were biting it to keep your whines inside your mouth as you tried to move away from his finger because it was soon becoming too much. He was having none of it and his other hand firmly found its place  on your jaw once again as he grunted right into your ear, “Be a good girl for once and take it. We have barely started.”
You did whine at that, his stare not fading for one second as he tightened his grip on your face and pulled your head back to the front every time you tried to look away from the mirror.
“Look at you. I haven’t even touched you properly yet and you’re already a mess, what happened to all that attitude, huh?”
He was right, he had only touched you through your panties and you were already so close. Guess you really were all bark and no bite – But to be honest: You were dripping, your underwear was soaked and his finger drawing shapes against your clit just felt so good you didn’t care about your little personality problem at all.
Your thighs were quivering from the stimulation and when he sped up his movements they tried to fly shut, but his voice stopped you midway, “Don’t you dare.”
You grabbed the fabric from his pants harshly, “Jeno, I’m-”
“Only talk when spoken to.”
This new side of Jeno, his heavenly (or devilish) finger teasing you plus his hard dick throbbing against your lower back, got you spasming in record time. Your nails carving shapes on the skin of his thighs as your whole body shook when you orgasmed. Jeno continued tracing your clit through your high, until you were jumping from sensitivity and whining at him to stop. He lightly pushed you so you would stand up and you struggled to comply with your shaky legs, but tried your best.
You stood in front of your boyfriend, expecting him to then order you to suck his dick or something and this would be all over with, but were surprised when he pulled your panties down your legs with delicate fingers. Goosebumps filled your skin again at the mere touch of his knuckles against your lower abdomen. It was weird how he touched you so softly while his eyes burned holes into you, you had never seen Jeno so worked up before, you felt like he could explode at the wrong move of a finger from you.
He slowly kneeled in front of you, eyes locked in yours. His hands were on the back of your thighs and you felt cold and warm at the same time, nipples hard with the shivers that ran up your spine. Jeno didn’t comment on your shaking frame, giving your clit a soft kiss as he stared up at you.
“Jeno, I-“ You began, trying to inform your boyfriend you were too sensitive from just cumming.
“I’ll make you cum once for every time you flirted with someone this week, and now once more for disobeying me,” He simply informed before going back to work, tongue doing wonders against your swollen clit.
You cried out at his words.
The man pulled your legs slightly apart so he could go all in, his wet lips and warm tongue playing with you until the sensitivity turned into pleasure and you were entering a place of euphoria, trying to not moan too loudly since his roommates were right outside. He noticed you were trying to contain your noises and tskd, eating you out more fervidly. When it became too much again, your hands grabbed his hair for support, which only resulted in you receiving a firm look, “No touching. If you want to act like a whore, I’ll treat you like one.”
Ouch.
You tried balancing on your feet, but your body was quivering at Jeno’s ministration and he wouldn’t let you go. Not managing it anymore, you let your body fall to the front, supporting your hands on the bed, thanking the heavens your boyfriend didn’t complain about it. You wanted to tell him you needed his fingers inside of you but didn’t want to disobey his order once again, only letting moan after moan leave your lips. Jeno simply looked animalistic kneeled in between your legs and you forced yourself to close your eyes, throwing your head back in pleasure.
You were not recognizing yourself but that thought was far from your worries as you released once again against his tongue, hand gripping  the sheets so tightly you were afraid of breaking your fingers. Jeno stood up, holding your waist so you would do the same as you breathed hard, “This one was for rubbing yourself all over Mark at Ten’s.”
You could see the way Jeno’s cock was throbbing against his pants, but he seemed to pay it no mind as he pushed you down into the bed on your back. He hovered over you, slightly brushing his lips against yours before telling you, “I’m giving you 10 seconds to recover.”
One, he counted out loud before kissing your cheek. Two, he mouthed just below your jaw. Three, he whispered and sucked on the side of your neck, making you twitch in bliss. Four, he licked your collarbone. Five, he kissed between your breasts, your back automatically arching. Six, he brushed his fingers against your hardened nipple, loving the sound of your mewls. Seven, he left an open-mouthed kiss on your stomach. Eight, he did the same to your navel, feeling your abdomen tense under his fingers.
Honestly, this was not helping you calm down at all. Shivering this much couldn’t be healthy.
On the count of nine, his nails scratched the inside of your thigh and on the count of ten, he plunged two fingers inside of you with no warning. You chocked around nothing, biting the back of your hand so you wouldn’t legit scream. You had never been so wet in your life and the way his fingers were slowly rubbing so good against your walls, had you out of your mind.
“Put your hand away, I want to hear you,” He ordered, eyes locked on the way his fingers disappeared inside of you. How did he even know you were biting on your hand?
He continued pumping and curling his fingers, speeding up when he felt your walls tightening. You started feeling your third orgasm approach you even faster than the first one, tensing your legs so you wouldn’t close them because of the sensitivity.
Jeno smirked at you, “Look who’s being a good girl for once.”
You didn’t even care anymore, everything felt so good you couldn’t even remember your name and you were sure you sounded like a porn star, having no control over your voice. You were so close, knuckles white again at the force you were holding onto your pillow. So, so close.
And then it all stopped.
You whined loudly and Jeno simply ordered, “Use my fingers.”
When you gave him a confused look, hoping you hadn’t understood what he said right, he nodded at you, “You heard me.”
You groaned and dropped back down, Jeno easing three fingers into you and waiting still, patiently. This was humiliating but when he gave you a pointed look, you simply forgot about your pride and pushed yourself against his fingers until you were ready to explode again, and as promised, Jeno didn’t do a thing, letting you make yourself cum only using his fingers. It didn’t take long, considering how fucked out you were already (and you weren’t even actually fucked yet). A few more bounces and you were done for, wanting to cry at how good it felt.
“This one was for getting my friends hard, prancing around in those mini clothes of yours.”
You couldn’t help shutting your legs now, body spasming every 2 seconds. Jeno said nothing about it this time as he stood on his knees, undoing his belt with one hand, groaning he couldn’t take it anymore. He dropped his pants and boxers, letting his cock out and your heart pumped faster at how hard and swollen it was.
Your boyfriend roughly opened your legs, positioning himself on top of you and entering you in one harsh thrust, not even waiting for you to adjust (not that you needed it much, considering he was just 3 fingers knuckles deep into you). Real tears started to run down your face at the oversensitivity, your mind couldn’t form a single comprehensible thought, “Jeno, I can’t-“
“I’m not stopping unless I hear the safe word, you can take it,” He snapped, voice as harsh as his thrusts inside of you. He had never fucked you this hard, the whole bed shaking and complaining. There was no way people wouldn’t know what was going on by now.
You trashed under him, it felt like too much but at the same time you didn’t want it to stop. Jeno’s hand was quick to wrap around your throat, squeezing on the sides to hold you down so you would stop moving.
“My pretty princess crying over getting fucked after acting like a slut for days. That doesn’t seem right, now, does it?” He groaned, not faltering his speed or strength one bit. “Tell me, if I didn’t give you the attention you wanted, would you have let one of them fuck you?”
You whined, nails digging harshly on his back (which he thankfully allowed). You thought about answering but you couldn’t really mutter any words with the way Jeno was drilling into you and he knew it.
“I asked you a question,” He hissed, tightening his grip around your neck, cutting the blood circulation from reaching your head.
The lightheadedness didn’t help your case and after another few seconds without an answer, you felt a sting from the slap Jeno gave right across your face. He had never done that before and as a strong independent woman, you didn’t expect to like it as much as you did it.
“Don’t make me repeat myself.”
“N-no.”
“No what?” He demanded. The neighbors must really hate you from the way the bed frame kept hitting the wall, but nothing else really matter besides how you were being so pleasantly destroyed.
“Only you can fuck me.”
“That’s right, you’re mine. Open up.”
You were not sure what he meant, embarrassed of doing what you thought he was implying and being wrong, but when he stared you down so intensely that you got actually scared, you slowly opened your mouth. He gave you a wicked smile before slowing down his thrusts a bit, his hold on your neck still strong and when he slowly lowered himself and spit right into your mouth, your body betrayed you and you came all over the place without a warning, not even giving you the chance to brace yourself.
“Good girl,” He caressed the place he had slapped you with his thumb, stopping his movements to let you calm down for a bit. You were not even sure your brain would ever go back to working normally. He silently and slowly sucked marks on your body until your breathing somewhat resembled something normal again.
“Come look at yourself,” He called, tone a bit gentler. Maybe your tears softened him up a bit.
You tried to obey, carefully dragging yourself to the edge of the bed so you could stand up in front of the mirror where he wanted you. As soon as you tried standing up, your legs gave out, but Jeno was right behind you to catch you, holding you up by your waist and pointing to the mirror, “Look.”
And you did. You had purple bruises on the left side of your neck, on your breasts and on the inside of your thighs. Your hair was clearly all tangled up, there was dark mascara running down your face and smudged around your eyes. You looked absolutely wrecked already.
“So fucking pretty,” He whispered, littering your shoulder with soft kisses. “All of you. Every single part, and they are all mine.”
You shakily nodded. At this point, if Jeno wanted you to walk around wearing his hand as a necklace you wouldn’t even complain.
“It’s all of my friends’ wet dreams to fuck you, I don’t want to ever hear you moaning Haechan’s name or see you kissing Jaemin again, understood?” Your boyfriend told you, placing two of his fingers on your lip for you to suck. You wrapped your mouth around him, sucking on it gently and drawing your tongue along the length of his fingers, feeling his still hard cock against your lower back. He had no reason behind that action, he just wanted to show he could do whatever he wanted with you, whenever he wanted, and you would enjoy it.
“It was a joke,” You breathed out once he retrieved his hand, referring to the kiss your boyfriend was talking about.
“I know baby girl, but let’s not give them any hope. I want them to know who you belong to,” He quietly told you, his breath hitting your ear. “Get on all fours.”
You body stiffened, “Jeno, I really can’t-“
“Did I ask?” He cocked his eyebrow at you and you took a deep breath before shakingly obeying.
As you crawled in bed, your boyfriend finally took his clothes off before positioning himself behind you. At least this time he pitied you enough to at least start fucking you slowly.
A hiccup escaped your throat, almost sure you couldn’t handle it anymore and Jeno caressed your lower back to comfort you as he grinded his cock inside you, “Only one more, princess.”
You were in heaven and hell at the same time, your pussy was so sensitive that every thrust felt like you were right on edge, you had never experienced anything like that before. Your arms gave out quicker than your attitude dropped, left side of your face pressing against the sheet and staining it with your mascara and tears. You were honestly not even sure you were moaning anymore, not being able to hear yourself, but with the way Jeno sped up his movements you figured you were.
“Hands,” Jeno asked and you complied, like being used by him was your sole purpose in life.
He grabbed both of your wrists and held it together on your back, the bruising tight grip and the low groans leaving the man’s mouth brought you closer to reality.  If you were in a normal state of mind, you would wonder how your boyfriend could last so long, he had been hard and throbbing since he locked the door earlier - But since your mind was floating somewhere far away, your only reaction was to sob in pleasure and overstimulation.
“Do you remember the safeword, baby?”
You shut your eyes tightly and nodded your head desperately.
“Tell me,” Jeno asked.
“A-apple.”
“Good girl. We’re almost done,” He told you and you could feel how his thrust were getting shallower and messier. You were so close too.
After another few minutes, Jeno let out a loud moan and shot inside of you (something else you two rarely do, both of you enjoyed it but the pregnancy scares were always too much), you could feel his cum hitting your walls and you loved it. He continued to fuck into you for a whole minute, riding out his high as the hottest sounds left his lips. You clenched around his sensitive member, signaling you were close and he hissed, suddenly pulling out.
You whined like you had never whined before and he simply shushed you, slowly gathering his cum dripping from your hole with his fingers and pushing all of it back inside. You cried out, using your now free hands to hold onto the sheets as he pumped his finger into you – You honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the sheets were ripped by the end of the day. He was teasing you, knowing you wouldn’t be able to reach your high with the speed he was using. You tried pushing back into his fingers but he was quick to hold your hip still, “I don’t think so. Sit down against the wall.”
You wanted to scream.
“Jeno, please,” You sobbed.
“What? You’ve been teasing me with Jaemin for almost 2 whole weeks and I can’t even tease you for a few minutes? Don’t you think that’s a little bit unfair?” He asked, stopping his fingers only when he felt your walls spasming around him. “Now do as I say.”
You accepted your fate, trembling as you followed his instructions, surprised when he got out of the bed and sat down on his desk chair, calmly looking at you.
“Touch yourself,” He instructed. “But don’t cum, or else we will go for another round.”
“You said we were almost over,” You wail.
“And we are baby, just do this one more thing for me.”
You opened up your legs, letting your fingers rub against your clit. You were so wet and Jeno’s cum just made you more lubricated. Since you were already so worked up, you had to trace less than 5 circles against yourself before becoming a noisy mess, ready to let it all go.
“Stop,” Your boyfriend’s strict voice cut you off.
You opened your eyes, which you hadn’t even noticed you had closed, and stared at Jeno in shock, halting your motions.
“Now do it again while looking at me.”
You held the sob that wanted to escape down your throat, shakingly nodding and obeying, just doing anything he wanted so you could cum already. You touched yourself while you looked into Jeno’s stern eyes, your cheeks burning at the fact he had never seen you so vulnerable before.
“I can’t hold it any-“ You stuttered, your eyes stinging again.
“Stop.”
The sob that you had been trying to hold back escaped, ripping through your whole body, you had no pride anymore, or shame, as you let your tears spill freely as you begged, “Please, Jeno. Please. I ca-can’t-“
Jeno silently got up and crawled into bed, positioning his head in between your legs.
“It’s ok, princess. You can cum now,” He told you gently before lowering his head and sucking on your clit. He only had to do that three times and you were seeing colors you never had before. The wave of pleasure hit you so strongly that you tough you passed out for a second or two, seeming lost when you managed to open your eyes again.
“Hey baby, it’s ok,” Jeno comforted you softly, quickly getting up on his knees to hug you with one hand while drying the tears that wouldn’t stop soaking your flushed face. “I got you, it’s all over now.”
He was fast to embrace you tightly, bouncing you gently like people do to calm babies down as he muttered praising words after praising words against your ears. It all filled your heart with warmth and pride.
“Want to take a bath?” He asked you in his baby voice and you managed  to form a small smile, remembering that was the same man who was slapping you across the face and spitting in your mouth a few minutes ago.
You nodded and the boy ran into the bathroom so quickly you didn’t even process his absence.
“I’m only preparing the bath, baby. I’m here,” He assured you when he wasn’t back after a minute or so. You were thankful he understood how vulnerable you felt in this moment and how it was something new to you.
He eventually came back and cuddled you until he felt like the tub was full enough. Jeno carried you easily to the bathroom and tested the water temperature before placing you down with care.
“I used your favorite bath bomb,” He smiled and you returned the gesture, appreciating the warm water around your muscles and the gold glittery appearance of it. “I’m just going to go grab our towels, ok? I’ll be right back.”
You waited for a while, playing with the water and taking deep breaths to inhale the vanilla scent coming from it. The water looked so creamy and you slowly rubbed your face with it, trying to clean all the make up and dried tears. You were content, you just had the best sex of your life and Jeno was proud of you.
You were almost falling asleep when you heard your boyfriend’s voice, “Honey, are you covered?”
You looked down confusedly at the opaque water, the man had just almost chocked you to death, why was he worrying about your modesty now out of all times?
“Yeah, why?”
“Jaemin and Haechan are being a pain in the ass, they want to make sure I didn’t kill you.”
At that you laughed and just let yourself slid down the bathtub, letting the water drown you in shame.
    ____________________________________
“Babe?” You called, watching the way Jeno played with your fingers. When the boy hummed at you, you continued, “What finally set you off?”
“What do you mean?”
“Like, I’ve been trying to get on your nerves for days-“
“Oh,” He laughed and then sighed in embarrassment at his confession, “Jaemin called you baby, only I get to call you that.”
You turned around from where he was holding you on the tub, trying to see if he was serious, only to find your boyfriend pouting.
“I can’t believe you, Jeno Lee.”
3K notes · View notes
neopuppy · 2 months ago
Text
Hot Sauce (M). Part 4.
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Preview: “Why don’t you just fuck all his friends? If he really was that heart broken over you moving away back then, he’ll go mental.” your friend suggests. You stare into the screen, swiveling back and forth in your computer chair.
“Have you seen his friends? That would be too easy..” you smirk to yourself toying with the idea.
Pairing: NCT Dream 00’ line x female reader
Word Count: 6.7k
Genre: PWP, M/F, Step brother Jeno AU, parents are miraculously never home, enemies to fucking.
Warnings: Jeno’s very mean- very, name calling, bullying, explicit language, degradation, smut
Smut Warning: whew ok- overstimulation, fingering, oral, gaping, teasing, crying, hair pulling, anal, squirting, possessive behavior, a little dubious, exhibitionism, voyeurism, this is F-I-L-T-H.
Hot Sauce: Intro—>
Hot Sauce: Part 1–>
Hot Sauce: Part 2–>
Hot Sauce: Part 3–>
“You think I’m so fucking stupid.” Jeno digs his hands into your hair, pulling you up by your scalp. You scream out, slapping at his forearms, his hold loosens sitting you up. Jeno squats down, grabbing your chin between his fingers. “I know you went through my phone.”
You lean forward weakly, still not recovered from Jaemin. Jeno’s words passing through your ears like static noise.
“What happened to- ‘I’ll stop Jeno!’ Huh? Why are you so determined to piss me off?” Jeno drops his hand, gripping his thighs. “You’re so fucking frustrating.” He tsks, shaking his head.
“Clean yourself up, you look like a whore.” He stands up straight, giving you a look of disgust. Jeno turns, heading out the door. You burst into tears, stumbling to stand up. Your core throbbing in the aftermath of taking all of Jaemin’s size.
“Jeno!” You run to catch up to him, arm banging into the wall. “Jeno, I-.. I can, I can explain!”
Jeno stops in the hallway, rolling his shoulders back. You wrap your arms around yourself feeling exposed, admiring the way his back muscles move under his shirt.
“It’s just.. I really like..” you begin to stutter, body temperature rising with each word. Jeno turns slowly, looking down at you in question, egging you to continue. “I like you.” You look down at your feet, murmuring under your breath. Jeno moves in closer, ducking his head down face level with you.
“What was that now?” Jeno asks.
“Don’t make me say it again, please.” You cover your face, embarrassment coursing through you. Jeno grabs your wrist, turning you until your back is against the wall.
“You’re fucking with me again aren’t you?” Jeno scoffs, pulling your hands free from your face. “There’s no way you mean that. I treat you like shit, all I do is berate you, call you derogatory names-..”
“I like it!” You shut your eyes, beating your head back against the wall. Jeno’s hold on your wrists tightens, leaning in closer, pressing you flat.
“What the hell do you mean?”
“God Jeno! I just..” you mewl, trying to cower into yourself. Jeno’s clothed body pressed against your very bare one making you uncomfortably hot. “No one.. no one treats me like you do. I like it, ugh” you drop your head back, internally cringing. “I like you, I like how mean you are to me.”
Jeno cups your face, the most gentle he has ever been. His face swoops forward, nose pressing against yours.
“You’re lying, aren’t you?” Jeno frowns, questioning with a serious tone.
“No!” You wrap your hands around Jeno’s thick neck. “It’s...you...” you whimper, legs losing balance weakly, held up be Jeno’s weight. His eyes squint, eyeing your tormented expression. A sound escapes from the back of your throat, a whiny little squeak. Jeno lifts a finger to your lips, shushing you.
“You like being degraded?” Jeno asks, pulling your bottom lip open. He leans in, flicking out his tongue, lapping at your top lip. You softly nod, letting your body completely give up. Jeno smooths his other hand down your neck, your chest, leading across your twitching stomach. “Or is is that, you like it specifically when I do it?” He smiles, eyes bunching up, hand reaching between your legs. You squirm trying to move your hips back, still sensitive. Jeno’s fingers swipe up and down, gathering your wetness.
“Oh no no..” he tsks, smiling wider with teeth.
“Please.. hurts” you hiss out, Jeno’s fingers circling your swollen entrance.
“No it doesn’t baby, cause you’re a dumb slut. All dumb slut’s know how to do is get fucked.” Jeno leans down, whispering against your lips. Shoving three fingers in you as far as they’ll go.
He presses his lips down softly, sweetly kissing you. Your mind short circuiting trying to decipher whether you’re enjoying this. Jeno’s lips trail down, kissing over your chin to your neck. Pausing only to suck on the tender skin, teeth biting down as he does.
Your neck hangs back, held up by only the wall. Thighs squeezing around Jeno’s hand. Jeno forces his thigh between your legs, shoving you open. Fingers pressing in, searching for that spot deep inside. Mouth continuing to make way around your collar and shoulders, leaving behind glistening teeth indentations. Your face drops forward letting out a long cry, legs squeezing around Jeno’s thigh.
“Tell me it hurts but your pussy’s sucking me in..” Jeno mumbles moving around, shoving his other leg between you. He emphasizes his words with harsh thrusts inside, walls squeezing around his fingers without resistance.
“Ah!..” you hiss, hot tears flowing out of your eyes. You grip Jeno’s wrist with both hands. He tsks, biting at your jaw roughly.
“You’re gonna take it, like the fucking whore you are.” Your grip around Jeno does nothing, he wiggles in harder. Fingers moving with speed inside of you. You gasp in air, neck losing all strength to hold your head up. Jeno’s fingers curl upward, pressing in hard with a mean shake. You let go of him, hands falling to your sides, body leaned against the wall weakly. Your lower half trembling, half from Jeno’s movements alone. You jolt forward, fingers hitting something inside that makes you wail out.
“That’s it.” Jeno lifts his other hand to your neck, shoving your head back into the wall. Fingers wrapping nearly all the way around making you feel even more helpless.
“Jen..Jeno” you whisper out, coughing, face feeling full of blood as Jeno chokes harder suppressing your air intake. His hand moving so fast, lewd sounds of wetness echoing off his palm through the hall. You grip at his hand around your neck, eyes squeezing shut releasing a scream loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear. Your core convulsing around his fingers like crazy. Wetness seeping out squirting aggressively all over Jeno’s legs. He shows no sign of slowing down, eyes burning into your center watching you explode.
Jeno presses lips against yours with a growl, thrusting in so hard. The veins and muscles lining up his forearm bulging out over worked. You clench down with a few more thrust, arching up into him squirting out more than you ever have before. Actually never have before, not even aware you could. Jeno bites at your lips, finally slowing his fingers. They slide out, hand coated in your wetness, arm and legs too.
“Look at the mess you’ve made” Jeno shakes his hold around your neck. “Soiled my clothes.” You whimper, scratching down his arm unable to respond. He releases you, your body weakly slumping forward onto him. He grips a chunk of your hair pulling to make you look at him.
“Dirty slut doesn’t even know how to say sorry. I have to teach you everything don’t I?” Jeno’s arm wraps around your waist, dragging you toward to couch with ease. He shoves you down across the top, frame digging into your back awkwardly.
“Please..” you whimper so wantonly, curling your legs up to hide your sensitive area. Jeno pulls off his drenched shirt, showing off the powerful body he taunts you with daily.
“Please?” He smirks, releasing a sarcastic laugh, a mocking sound. “You’re never gonna stop begging are you?” Jeno pulls down his boxers and sweats, stepping out of them. Cock looking hard and angry, like it’s ready to rip you open. You squirm, core burning just at the sight. Jeno grabs your hips, turning you over so you’re bent over the couch. You grip at the cushion beneath you shaking your head.
“I can’t! I can’t!” You try to turn, Jeno pushing you down until your face is shoved into the seat.
“You think I want this pussy? Loose hole that everyones been in?” Jeno strokes his fingers between your ass. You clench up, legs lifting to get away. “But this..” Jeno smiles to himself, circling your rim with his fingers, prodding the tip of one in. You flinch at the new sensation, gripping the couch.
“This belongs to me.” Jeno squats down, holding your ass apart. Tongue swiping up and down your crack. His tongue laps over your hole, spitting in between licks. Jeno reaches for his cock, squeezing at the base feeling himself too excited. He groans into your ass, tongue poking around trying to enter. Dropping down a glob of spit growing impatient.
“Only thing fat on you is this ass..” Jeno says to himself, slapping over the meat of your behind. He shifts to stand up again, spitting into his hand, stroking over his cock lazily. Not much concerned with how stretched out you are or aren’t. Jeno holds around your waist, sliding his cock head around your hole. You pathetically lift your head looking over your shoulder. Feeling like too much and not enough at the same time. Jeno’s eyes land on yours, pushing his cock in past the tight ring of muscles.
“Keep your eyes on me.” He grits out, before you can squeeze them shut. Jeno slowly inches forward, the new foreign feeling traveling up your spine. “This is what you wanted isn’t it?” You keep Jeno’s gaze, brain too fogged up to register his question right away. Your mouth falling open, drooling into the couch with each inch pressing forward.
Jeno bends over on top of you, putting his body weight over yours completely. He reaches under your cheek gripping around your jaw.
“I said this” he thrust in, cock sliding past half way. You cry out a scream, so stretched and full. In disbelief he’s not even all the way in. “..is what you want” he plunges in, length fully inside you. Your ass clenching down impossibly hard.
“Isn’t it.” Jeno groans out, emphasizing by pressing his hips in. You nod rapidly, shutting your eyes to control the tears falling out.
“Say it.” He thrusts in again, struggling to glide between your tight ass. “You’re a dumb slut.” You cry harder, your hole finally relaxing enough for Jeno to thrusts in easily. You sigh, a mixture of tears, drool, probably snot leaving your face uncomfortably messy.
“I’m.. I’m..a.. dumb slut” you whisper out, mewling. Jeno pulls back, shoving in roughly. He squeezes down on your waist for leverage, working up a speed fast enough. Your ass slapping back into his hip bones hard, loud sounds of skin clapping erupting all around you.
“You’re my dumb slut.” Jeno pounds into you faster and faster. He turns your jaw, neck straining in his hold. “Gonna fuck you all over this house until you learn.” He groans, dick pulsating so deep in your ass. You try to nod, too fucked out and weak.
“Everywhere you look will remind you who these sloppy fuck holes belong to.” Jeno pants, hips losing their rhythm, trying to prolong his climax. “Mine” he delivers a deep thrust, gritting his teeth. “Always been mine.”
Jeno grinds into your ass, letting out deep raspy screams against your ear. Hot cum pours out deep into your ass, Jeno circling his hips down until the very last spurt. He let’s out a long sigh, catching his breath. You tremble beneath him, too spent and overwhelmed with pleasure. Thinking you weakly came at some point, trying to clear your mind. Thoughts riddled in Jeno, his scent, his body, his cock.
Jeno pushes his forehead against the side of yours, cock jostling inside you. You bite back a hiss, pain in your ass shooting up with movement.
“You’re mine.” His tongue laps at your cheek. “Don’t forget who you belong to now.”
—————————————————————————
“Are you sick? Why’d you miss class today?” Your friend questions through the video call. You cross your legs, leaning back into your computer chair.
“No..” you chew over your nail contemplating telling her all about yesterday with Jeno. Abused lower half only a constant reminder of everything.
“Ok? What’s going on? Are you ok??” She asks with concern.
“No no.. I’m fine. I’m more than fine. I’m...I’m great!” You smile dumbly, sinking into your seat.
“You’re being weird. Blink twice if Jeno’s holding you hostage.” You smile wider to yourself, bedroom door opening. Jeno standing there fresh out of the shower. You stare at him, eyes widening admiring his physique. Jeno steps further into your room.
“Hang up.” He stops at your side, eyes boring into yours.
“Oh my God, is that him?!” You hear your friend’s bewilderment. Jeno lifts your chin, thumb stroking over the skin.
“I said hang up.” You swallow with a nod, reaching your hand out blindly grabbing your mouse.
“I have to go.” You mutter, ending the video call. Your friends voice protesting to not hang up before the beeping indicating a call ending sounds out. Jeno releases your chin, spinning your chair so that your body faces him.
He stands up straight, tugging the knot of his towel open. Letting the cotton fall off his hips to the floor. Jeno’s hard cock blocking your vision. He steps forward between your legs, grabbing your shoulders. You stare at Jeno with wide eyes admiring his rippling muscles. Leaning forward, kissing at the tip of his cock. Jeno’s hold on you tightens, shoving you back into your chair. He kneels down quickly, shoving your legs apart.
“Don’t bother wearing these anymore” he tugs your underwear off, throwing them behind his back. You sink into the seat, nodding letting Jeno push up your knees. He tips his face forward, nosing up and down your slit. Eyes connected to yours, watching every little reaction you express.
Jeno pushes your thighs open further, hands holding the pits of your knees. He takes deep breathes, inhaling your scent making you squirm. Jeno groans, rubbing his face between your folds. Nose and chin coating in your wetness. He sighs, sloppily lapping at your dripping hole. You shake all over from your center, digging hands into his thick head of hair, gently tugging.
Jeno runs his tongue all over, licking between your folds, around the smooth sides. Lips wrapping around your clit, sucking with strength.
“Oh my God.. “ you stifle out, dropping your head forward watching Jeno roll at your clit. You tug on his hair more, earning a raspy sound from the back of Jeno’s throat, vibrating into your heat. You whine, body tensing up, lower half jerking forward. Jeno pushes at your legs, getting you bent up like a pretzel.
“Too much..” you pull at his hair again, squeezing it between your fingers. Hips bucking forward again, trying to shut your thighs around Jeno’s head. He ignores you, sucking and licking at your clit showing no mercy. The stimulation becoming too much, your stomach reaching into your back, thrusting into Jeno’s mouth.
“Fuck! Fuck I’m-.. I’m!” You scream out incoherently, cunt clenching at nothing in desperation. Tingles traveling from Jeno’s tongue through out your body. You fall back gasping for air, eyes rolling around watching the ceiling spin. Jeno kisses up and down your over heated center, lips shiny with wetness.
“So wet for me” Jeno growls, pulling away. Your hands falling to your sides limply. You look down, gasping, Jeno’s chin dripping with sheen. He licks over his lips, wiggling a brow. Jeno stands up, sight of his hard cock making your cunt grip down again.
“Come here baby” Jeno pulls your arms, squatting lower close to you. You look at him with confusion, eyes fully open in surprise.
“B..baby?” You question, wrapping arms around him. Jeno pulls your legs around his waist, hoisting you up with a growing smile. He nudges your nose, eyes hidden behind his smile.
“Baby.” He repeats, setting you down on your bed. You lay down, pulling your robe open displaying your bare body for him. He climbs on top of you, shoving the rest of the robe off. Cock resting against your stomach
“My baby..” Jeno lowly whispers, eyes trailing over you, sliding a hand down your stomach. Jeno shoves your legs open, pushing you apart with his knees. Large hand cupping around you soaked heated mound. Jeno grabs your leg with his other hand, pushing it forward against your chest.
“So flexible..” Jeno smirks, pushing your knee harder until it’s against your shoulder. Fingers sliding between your folds, rubbing the mixture of your cum and his spit together. He aligns his hips over you, cock shoving between your swollen lips. You stare down where Jeno teases your entrance, stretching you other leg out further.
“Beg for it, baby” Jeno smirks down at you, pulling his hips away. You nearly scream, arms lifting off the bed ready to pull him back in.
“Jeno stop, please” you whimper pathetically with grabby hands. Jeno turning you into the shameless desperate slut he reminds you that you are everyday. Jeno grabs the base of his length, swiping his cockhead up and down between you.
“I said beg.” He slaps your thigh harshly, pushing against your leg with fingers digging into the flesh.
“Please” you suck in air, embarrassment so far beyond your thoughts at this point. “Please just....Jeno, I want your cock. I love it, I wan-..ah fuck!” You shout out, Jeno fucking all the way into you, balls slapping your sensitive ass. “Ah Jeno, oh fuck you’re so s-so big.”
“Slut’s like you love being filled up hmm” Jeno questions, more so states, sliding out half way. He thrusts back in admiring how you wrap around his size. Dick coated in glossy like sheen with every thrust. You nod along agreeing to whatever he’s saying, the familiar overwhelming sensation returning to the bottom of your stomach with every plunge of Jeno’s cock. The way he fucks, the way he talks to you, incomparable.
“My baby’s gonna cum already. Begs for cock and can’t even handle it.” He bottoms out, burying balls deep into you. Jeno thumbs at your clit, circling his hips. Your head shakes in protests, moaning brokenly grabbing at your bed. You clench around his cock, arching up wailing out a scream. Walls pulsating around Jeno, vision blurring as the rush of satisfaction over comes you. Jeno pushes your clit in harshly, grinding his teeth together. Rasping out groans, soaking in how tight you grip around him.
“God damn” Jeno sighs, wrapping fingers around the base of his length. “Turn over baby, gonna cum in your ass.” You softly jerk up when Jeno slides out, weakly turning only half listening to his words. Your eyes fly open at the feeling of his cock pushing into your abused hole. Jeno shoves his cockhead past your swollen rim, stroking at his shaft. He screams out, biting into his lip hard enough to draw blood.
“Ugh..” you lay flat against the bed, hot white ropes of cum aggressively shoot into your ass. Jeno rolls his forehead between your shoulder blades, breathing and sighing heavily.
“Don’t..don’t move ok?” he quickly stands, stumbling out the door. You look over your shoulder in despair.
“Wha..” Jeno runs back in, black oddly shaped object in hand.
“I said don’t move.” He straddles the backs of your thighs. Picking up the lube thats begun dripping out with the toy. Jeno pushes his cum back in your asshole. “Yea, that’s a good girl.”
“Jeno...what..” you look at him over your shoulder confused. Shrieking when he shoves the plug into you. Jeno breaks into a grin, pleased with how your ass looks around the black plug.
“If you touch this” Jeno pokes at the plug, kissing one of your ass cheeks. “I’ll make you regret it.”
——————————————————————————-
“Jeno..” you whine out opening the door to his room. Jeno’s eyes stay on his computer, teeth digging into his lip focused on whatever game he’s playing.
“Jenoooooooo!” You raise your voice, stomping your foot down. Jeno double takes, finally looking at you. He pauses his game, pulling headphones off his ear.
“What is it baby?” His forehead creases looking you over.
“I need you, I can’t take this anymore.” You step closer, standing in front of him.
“Baby?” You hear Renjun’s muffled question out of Jeno’s headphones.
“Jeno what the fuck! I’m dying out here you dick!” Haechan yells out loudly, voice much clearer. Jeno rolls his eyes, hitting mute on their voices, turning off his camera before you step into view.
“You need me? What do you need hmm?” He turns in his chair fully facing you, grabbing onto your hips. You whimper, squirming in his grip. The uncomfortable sensation you’ve been carrying the past few hours growing stronger. “What’s so important that you had to interrupt me when I told you not to?” Jeno’s lips curl up, wiggling a brow.
“I’m sorry.. I can’t..” you wiggle around more. Jeno huffs out, pulling you down into his lap.
“You can, and you will. I’m not done playing yet.” Jeno hisses out, biting down on your earlobe. You shove your ass up against his sweats, whining with large watery eyes.
“But Jeno..”
“What? What was that?” Jeno grips your jaw roughly, glaring into your eyes. “What did I tell you about talking back?” Jeno grunts, pulling his headphones back on. You purse your lips together, shifting around on him searching for some type of friction.
“Just for that..” Jeno squeezes your hip, reaching into his sweats. He pulls out his cock, half way hard already. You lick your lips, eyes lighting up in excitement. Jeno pulls you skirt up, grinning widely. “No panties? You’re learning fast huh?” Jeno lifts your hips up, cock prodding at your entrance. You moan, finally, dropping your head back against his shoulder. Jeno slides into your wet entrance, lifting his hips up while pulling you down.
“Don’t move.” Jeno grits out, fully seethed inside of you. You lift your head up opening your eyes wide.
“But..” Jeno grips your jaw yet again, shoving your cheeks in.
“Shut up and be good for me.” He releases you, eyes focusing back on his computer screen. He unmutes his team, loud screams of anger and annoyance blasting out of his headphones.
“What the fuck Jeno! We just lost because of you shit head.” Haechan yells out. You bite down on your lips harshly, Jeno’s dick twitching between your lips. Dropping your head back again, sucking in a deep breath.
“I just got into, a tight situation. I’m back.” Jeno voices out, returning to selecting his weapons on the screen.
“Jeno, your cameras off still.” Jaemin states, your ear close enough to hear all of their conversation.
“Yea dude quit dicking around” Renjun replies, your eyes drift to the corner of the screen. The 3 of them shown, Jeno’s window all black. Nervously you clench down around his size. Jeno groaning lowly, tapping on his keyboard to make his player move along.
“Jeno, what’s going on? You drop cola on your keyboard again?” Jaemin questions. You shift around, swiveling you hips. Jeno grunts, wrapping his arm around your waist.
“Stop moving” he grits out. You whimper quietly, turning your face into his neck. Jeno sighs, thrusting up softly.
“Dude what’s going on? Pay attention!” Renjun shouts. “God man, turn your fucking camera on.” Jeno glares at the screen, clenching his jaw.
“Fine.” His webcam lights up green. You gasp, hiding your face further into his neck.
“Holy shit..” Jaemin’s voice mutters out, the boys faces on the screen all slack jawed in amazement.
“Isn’t that.. your step sister..” Haechan asks, much calmer forgetting the game.
“Don’t be shy, it’s nothing they haven’t seen before.” Jeno holds your jaw, turning your face toward the camera. The men on the screen all inhale, making you tremble anxiously. Jeno leans forward, angling his webcam lower. He pushes his chair back a bit, grabbing the hem of your skirt.
“Jeno..” you weakly mewl, squeezing your legs shut. Jeno’s hard length pulsating between your walls.
“The guys wanna play..” Jeno lifts up your skirt, displaying you to 3 sets of wide eyes.
“Oh fuck..” Jaemin rubs over his forehead, rubbing a palm over his lap. Jeno thrusts up, a yelp escaping you as he shoves in deep.
“God Jeno, what the fuck..” Renjun gulps, running his hands through his hair.
“This isn’t even the best part.” Jeno grunts, grinding up into you. He bites at your jaw, hissing against your skin. “Get up, slut.” You squeeze your eyes with a cry, nodding. Slowly sliding off of Jeno, savoring every inch. He growls lowly, gripping your hips, turning you quickly. You stumble forward, falling over Jeno, his strong arms keeping you held up. Jeno keeps you bent over his shoulder, hot hands sliding up the back of your thighs. He grabs the bottom of your skirt, flipping it up revealing your hole stretched out around a black plug.
“Holy fuck dude.” Haechan huffs out, pulling out his dick.
You squeeze your eyes, letting tears fall down your cheeks. Heated up in embarrassment, wetness soaking between your thighs, so turned on. Jeno squeezes your ass harshly, spreading you open, parting you as far as you’ll go.
“Your pretty little ass.” He toys with you, squeezing and pulling you apart. Plug glistening in your wetness on camera, earning groans from the audience.
“Fuck she told me she wasn’t into that” Jaemin whines out, massaging over his balls.
“She takes whatever I give her, isn’t that right?” Jeno punctuates with a hard slap to your ass, handprint indicating just how hard. Your breath hitches, nodding your head rapidly in response.
“Jeno..” you whine out again, much louder. Haechan runs a hand over his face, dropping his head back.
“Fuck that whores ass Jeno. It’s what she wants” He moans out with a grin. Eyes focused on Jeno giving you short thrusts with the plug. Jeno growls, gliding the plug out with a loud wet pop.
“Please” you wail out, cum dripping down your inner thighs falling out of your hole in copious amounts.
“Oh my god..” Renjun pants, stroking at his cock faster. Jeno pulls you apart, displaying your gaped hole.
“You need me deep in your ass again? That’s what you came here for right baby?” Jeno taunts. You nod looking over your shoulder, face wrecked soaked with tears.
“Please, please fuck my ass.” You beg out.
Jeno grins grabbing your waist, pulling you down into his lap. Cum smearing over his sweats, cock jabbing into your stomach. He pecks over your wet cheeks, finishing with a deep kiss on your lips. Hands squeezing and pulling at the meaty flesh of your ass. He slides down to your thighs, lifting you up easily, prodding his cock at your gaping rim. Jeno slowly enters, your hole stretched open already from the plug. His groans mixing in with the ones coming from his computer behind you.
Jeno leans back into his chair, lazily thrusting up into your ass with a wicked smirk. You moan, reaching behind spreading yourself open.
“Oh fuck..” Renjun pants out, stroking his dick faster, squeezing over the head. Leaning forward over his desk, concentrating on Jeno’s screen.
“Doing so good baby” Jeno cups your face, smoothing thumbs under your eyes wiping the tears away. You lean in pouting your lips out begging for attention. Jeno licks across your mouth, teasing you with soft wet pecks.
“Gross, come on dude! Fuck her ass” Haechan grunts loudly, annoyed by how turned on he is. Annoyed he isn’t the one sunken deep in your ass. Jeno ignores him, peppering your mouth and chin with kisses. He squeezes your backside, lifting you up until he fully slides out. You squint tilting your head in confusion.
“Bend over for me baby” Jeno smiles, eyes disappearing behind thick dark lashes. You nod, turning around gripping the ledge of his desk. You give the three boys on the screen a once over. Their mouths hung open, arms flexed pulling at their dicks. You arch your back in, shoving your ass up for Jeno. He stands, pulling the small camera off the computer. Setting it low enough for everything to be on display.
Jeno sinks back into your fucked out hole with a growl, shoving your skirt up. He doesn’t wait, thrusting into you with speed, balls slapping against your cunt. Gripping your hair, pulling your face up to make you watch the screen. Tears rush out of your eyes, whimpering out sobs of pleasure feeling heated all over.
“Fuck yea” Haechan circles around his cock, precum spilling out.
Jeno leans down, licking and biting at your cheek. Thrusting into you at an animalistic pace. Your body shoving into his desk harshly, edges digging into your hips.
“Je-..Jeno!” You cry clenching your eyes. “So good.. you feel so good!” Jeno growls in response, stilling inside of you with a rough grind.
“Shit!! I’m cumming!” Renjun falls back against his seat, eyes fluttering shut ejaculating out on his shirt. Jaemin groans, the loud sound of skin slapping together coming from his screen. He smacks his huge cock against his stomach, mouth pursed together tightly. Haechan lifts his hips up and down, imagining your ass wrapped around his size, breathy whined out moans falling from his lips.
“Tell them what a slut you are baby” Jeno rasps, biting your earlobe. “Ugh, tell them how you love getting your hole fucked full of cum!”
“Fuck fuck!” Haechan screams out brokenly, cum shooting out hitting his chin. You clench around Jeno whimpering, watching Haechan fall back down like he could pass out any second. Jeno pulls out to the tip, shoving your face directly into the camera.
“Tell them!” He repeats with anger, thrusting back in, pounding at your broken hole.
“I’m..I’m a slut! I’m y-your slut Jeno! Please! f-fill me.. with y-your cum!” You scream out, vocals cracking between sounds of anguish, sounds of over heightened pleasure.
Jaemin’s eyes roll back grunting out a moan, squeezing at his cock head. Cum pooling around his abs, landing in his bellybutton.
Jeno thrusts in one more time, releasing his seed deep into your hole. He breathes harshly against your cheek, eyelashes fanning over your forehead. You cry harder, rocking back into Jeno’s burly body weighing you down.
“J-Jeno..” you weakly squeeze around him. Jeno sighs, nodding against your face.
“I know baby” he pecks you ear, lethargically lifting up. Jeno wraps his arms around your waist pulling you up with him. Webcam pointed between your legs. The boys on the screen all slowly recovering, cleaning up the messes they’ve made. Jeno circles around your clit, pinching and rolling.
“Who fucks you the best?” Jeno asks, punctuating with a slam forward into your ass.
“Y-you. You Jeno!” He slides fingers in you, jerking them around with expertise. You grind against him, so close to the edge. Your stomach sucks in, feet lifting off the ground with a shout. Climax hitting you with intensity, squirting across the desk in front of you, some landing on the camera.
“Fuck me man. I want a step sister.” You faintly hear, dropping your head back on Jeno’s shoulder, eyes falling shut.
——————————————————————-
“What do you feel like watching?” Jeno asks, clicking the remote searching through movies on the tv. You lay into his side, sniffing at his t-shirt.
“Just put on whatever” you mumble drowsily, Jeno’s arm wrapping around your shoulder. You smile relaxing into him, Jeno throwing a blanket over your lower halfs.
“Not going to be paying attention are you?” Jeno asks, choosing some action film. He taps your nose, nudging your chin with his shoulder. “Don’t fall asleep.”
“Ugh, but it’s been a long day..” you hum lazily, eyes drooping.
“You’re just gonna leave me like this?” Jeno nods to his lap, blanket risen up. He slides his hand beneath, sounds of a zipper opening following.
“I’m...I’m s-sore..” you mumble quietly, squeezing your legs together nervously. Jeno smirks, tapping you chin.
“What good are you to me if I can’t use every one of your holes?” He pulls your bottom lip open with a thumb, tugging it down. “This pretty mouth has to know how to do something besides whine like a brat all the time.” You huff out, moving your mouth away from his fingers.
Jeno grabs the back of your neck with the arm around you. Hips lifting up, blanket pooling to his thighs revealing his hardened length. He pushes you down, heavy hand squeezing your nape. You part your lips over the head of his cock, lazily lapping at his slit. Jeno grunts shaking his head, hand gripping into your hair.
“You can do better than that.” He shoves you with force, mouth parting open around his size. You gag in surprise, moving down the length quickly with Jeno’s help. “That’s a good girl.” He sighs, relaxing his neck against the couch.
“Just stay like that..” You faintly hear his voice, gagging out loudly, dick completely filling your mouth. “Don’t move” Jeno massages the back of your head, other arm lifting behind his own stretching his back.
Your eyes water, coughing out spit every minute. Throat contracting around his size with every breath. Jeno releasing occasional sighs, squirming in place when you swallow around him. Minutes go by, your eyes burning with tears, tongue growing tired.
The sound of the front door opening and closing making you jolt bent over with your mouth full of Jeno’s cock. He doesn’t release you, eyes shifting toward the door.
“Fuck.” He mutters under his breath, you slap at his thigh with urgency. Jeno lifts his hips, eyes focused on the hallway. He circles into you with a groan, finally pulling you off. You gasp, drool falling out of your mouth heavily. Eyes shiny with tears, lips swollen and abused.
“Kidssss! We’re home!” Your mother’s voice burst out, stepping into the living room with her arms out stretched. You quickly inhale, wiping at your chin with the back of your hand. Jeno pulls the blanket back over his lap, nodding in your Mom’s direction.
“Oh hey, welcome back.” He calmly says, as if nothing had been happening. Jeno’s dad follows behind carrying bags of luggage in hand. He huffs out a heavy breath dropping them, eyes landing on you and Jeno.
“What are you two doing?” He questions suspiciously, looking around as if he will find something incriminating. You continue to duck your face, worried your wrecked appearance would lead to further questioning.
“Watching a movie dad” Jeno shrugs, pointing to the tv. His dad lifts a brow, acknowledging how close together you and Jeno are sat.
“Don’t you two hate each other?” His father questions, glaring at Jeno.
“Sweetie leave them alone, it’s cute! They’re finally bonding!” Your mom cheers, grabbing her husbands arm. “I’m so exhausted, come on I need a shower.” Jeno’s dad groans, holding back a yawn. Eyeing back and forth between the two of you.
“Fine fine..” he squints again, hesitating before heading up stairs. “Whatever you two are trying to hide, I’m going to figure it out.” He waggles a finger at you and Jeno. Jeno lifting a brow with a shrug.
“Night dad.” He turns his attention back to the movie, completely nonchalant. Your mom dragging her husband away. You wait for the sound of their bedroom door shutting, slapping at Jeno’s chest.
“God, you fucking jerk!” You hiss out, earning a cocky smirk in return. Jeno shifts, pulling the blanket off.
“We’re not done here yet. Suck my dick.”
—————————————————————————-
“Jeno?” You whisper stepping into his room, clothes strewn around the floor. You turn your head, realizing the shower you share is in use. “Oh..” you step into his room, picking up the dirty clothes he must have stripped out of, tossing them into his hamper.
You look around, skimming your fingers across his walls as you slowly take steps further in. Deciding to hang out and wait for him to finish washing up, you sit down on his bed. Sniffing at the air, it smells like Jeno, cologne mixing in with his freshly sweat soaked skin having just gotten back from practice. With a sigh, you lay back, rubbing your face over his pillows. You stretch out your arms getting comfortable, hand finding it’s way under one of Jeno’s pillows.
You sit up, lifting the pillow, hand holding onto a thick piece of paper. Turning it over, your mouth falls open. It’s a photo of you from middle school, your last year before transferring to be exact.
“What are you doing?” Jeno steps inside, shutting the door behind him. Eyes darting to the photo he’d cut out of a yearbook in your hands. You lift it up, holding back a smile.
“What am I doing? What are you doing with this?” You let out a laugh, Jeno squaring his jaw. He sits down next to you, holding onto the top of the towel hanging dangerously low around his hips.
“It’s nothing.” Jeno snatches the photo out of your hands. You gasp, smacking at his wet arm.
“You seriously haven’t changed at all.” You frown dramatically, hiding the smile trying to creep onto your face. “I can’t believe little Jeno Lee wanted to be my boyfriend so bad.”
“I already told you, I didn’t have a crush on you.” He sighs, finger grazing over the photo he’d been holding onto ever since the year you switched school’s.
“We really need to work on those communication skills.” You lean over placing your chin on Jeno’s shoulder. Hand lifting to push the wet dripping hair back off his face. “At least now you can just fuck me until I stop asking questions.”
“Is that all I have to do?” Jeno moves quickly, shoving you down on his bed. He places the photo on his nightstand, dropping the towel off his hips in the process. He moves over you, knees pressing into the bed at both of your sides. You swallow, eyeing over his smooth body. A few droplets of water cascading down still.
“My mom’s in the kitchen making dinner..” you mutter, stomach coiling in heat. Jeno strokes up and down his cock, leaning forward with his other hand by your head.
“Then I guess you’ll just have to be quiet.” He smirks, unbuttoning your jeans.
“Jeno.. your dad already thinks it’s weird how close we are now..” you whine, lifting your hips up for him to shimmy your jeans down.
“Doesn’t matter” he shrugs, pulling your legs free. Jeno moves between you, sliding his cock head around your slit. You groan, gripping at the pillow behind your head.
“I told you to be quiet.” Jeno slaps his hand over your mouth, thrusting forward. Seething deep inside you with one quick go.
—————————————————————————-
“Look at you two, arriving to eat dinner together. On time too!” Your mom beams brightly, setting down the silverware. You slow down your steps not having realized you both ran straight down here together after fucking. You nod to her taking a seat, smoothing the fly aways on your head down.
“Yes” Jeno’s dad flips through a magazine, eyeing over the two of you as Jeno takes the seat next to you. “You two finally got over being brats huh?” Jeno doesn’t respond, grabbing his glass of water to avoid the question.
“I think it was just-..” you flinch, Jeno’s hand sliding in between your thighs under the table. “Uh..” you swallow, licking over your dry lips. “A matter of spending time.. alone... together..” you stutter out, Jeno squeezing around your mound through your jeans. You quickly grab your own water, chugging down half of it.
“That’s so great, I love seeing you two finally acting like brother and sister.” Your mom responds, holding a forkful of salad mid-air. You choke on your water, coughing harshly. Jeno continues to chew on his food calmly, hand sliding into your pants, fingers circling your clit.
“Ah, I’m not sure if that’s really what we are..” Jeno finally speaks up, squeezing your clit between two fingers. Rolling around back and forth. You nod, leaning in, pretending to be interested in your food. “I think what we have is even more special than that.” Jeno grins, eyes shifting to you, fingers sliding further in teasing at your entrance. “Like, you scratch my back..” His fingers slide in, palm forced against your clit. “I’ll scratch yours..”
“So long as it’s keeping you two out of my hair.” Jeno’s dad chirps out between bites.
“Angel, you haven’t touched your food. Something wrong? You look kind of sweaty.” Your mom asks you, eyebrows furrowing together. Your purse your lips lifting your head. Jeno wiggling his fingers inside of you.
“It’s delicious if you ask me.” Jeno says taking another bite, throwing you a wink. Fingering you deep, pressing down at that spot inside of you that makes you crazy.
“Could use some hot sauce.”
Hot Sauce: Deeply Dip That—>
a/n: *passes out*
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neopuppy · a month ago
Text
Hot Sauce: Deeply Dip That (M)
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Preview: “Deposit for the beach villas non-refundable. Fuck, I’m an idiot. I was starting to trust her..” Jeno’s head drops, ripping at chunks of hair frustrated.
“That’s no problem dude. We’ll help you pay the rest. An entire month at the beach? You’ll be so deep in ass, won’t even remember what she looks like anymore.” Jeno’s three best friends nod, patting his back with reassurance.
Pairing: NCT Dream 00’ line x female reader
Word Count: 19k+
Genre: PWP, Step brother Jeno AU, still enemies-still fucking, smut, M/F, Five-way, *squints, rubs eyes* is that angst? ew. This is FICTION.
Warning: Jeno’s still really mean, explicit language, possessive behavior, alcohol mentioned
Smut Warning: humiliation, degradation, overstimulation, a lot of dick, squirting, oral, spanking, sensory deprivation, choking, crying, hair pulling, slapping, spitting, rimming, anal, double-penetration, cum shots galore. This series had no purpose other than to serve filth. 1000000% consented.
You know what’s about to go down.
a/n: as a thank you to all 2000+ of you following this blog💙 don’t let your tongue burn on this hot sauce.
Intro—>
Part 1–>
Part 2–>
Part 3–>
Part 4–>
“Jeno! Stop it! Our parents are right inside!” You slap away roaming hands. Relaxing back into the lounge chair. Jeno’s irritated groan responding, hands itching, smacked away from your thighs. Flopping back in the chair next to you with a defeated sigh. Why did your parents have to come back home. Why did you have to strut around with your ass hanging out of a thong bikini. Jeno couldn’t stand having you so close and scantily bared much longer.
“My dicks all hard now!” His hissed tone hushes out. Doors leading from the kitchen to backyard slightly left ajar. “I want to touch you! I’m tired of this. First your mom busts into the bathroom this morning when I’m trying to get off. Blue balled me so bad I’m still in pain. My dad lecturing me last night for two hours about how I need to be responsible with my money. I can’t even sneak into your room with them around.”
“You think they’re on to us?” You sit up, nudging your sunglasses down. Shamelessly checking out his bare skin coated in a sheen of sweat. It was becoming overbearing, seemed unfair to not be hanging off Jeno’s cock at least more than once per day. At this point even just once was becoming too troublesome for both of you to pull off.
“I don’t fucking care even if they are. If they know, then we should just fuck anyway.” Jeno’s too spoiled, has never had problems getting what he wants- when he wants. This bratty nature he reveals once in awhile doing nothing for the agitation between your thighs.
“You’re right. They probably don’t know.” Eyes rolling, settling back with a sigh. Trying to enjoy the first days of summer upon you. Absorbing the heat coming down. Jeno sits up looking around, watching your parents cook dinner together in the kitchen. Stopping after every added seasoning and condiment to embrace. Face turning disgusted the longer he watches. He glances around, eyes landing on the small pool house where extra towels for guests are kept. Like a light bulb going off in his mind, he perks up standing from his seat.
“I need uh.. a towel. Maybe you should grab one too.. in a bit.” Jeno’s eyes scan your body. Brows lifting with suggestion.
“Why are you being weird.” You state, not question. Removing your sunglasses, sitting up fully. “If you wanna fuck in the pool house, just say that.”
“..and if you know what the fuck I mean, don’t be such a bitch.” Jeno’s low voice rasps. Having figured you out by now, the way you love to get him annoyed. To quote your words ‘It’s like my soul leaves my body when you fuck me full of hate’. Your hand lifts, waving Jeno away.
“Yea yea, go hide with the laundry. I’ll be there in a minute.” You watch Jeno try to subtly make his way to the shed. Pondering to yourself once again- what the hell are you doing? What started off as entertainment now turning into a huge problem. It was becoming a lot to handle. The constant hot and cold. Muddled insecure thoughts keeping you up at night. Jeno giving you enough- but not enough. As much as you tried to convince yourself he could dick you down like nobody else, it didn’t soothe your stacking questions. Why the fuck hadn’t he asked you to be with him yet, officially. Was this seriously going to be some friends.. step siblings with benefits crap forever?
There you go again, off on a mental tangent. Not even realizing you’ve sat there chewing on your thumb nail growing more irritable by the second. Didn’t he like you? How could this seriously be just sex after everything..
But the fucking.. God just thinking about Jeno’s dick had you tingling all over. Right right— Jeno’s dick. Standing up with a look inside the house, your parents backs facing you where they stand side by side at the stove cooking. You sneak your way toward the pool house. Opening the door to the sight of Jeno leaned back against the dryer. Stroking his hardening length to full mass. Sighing to yourself with relaxation taking over. Focusing in on the shine of precum gathered on tight abs.
“Fuck, what took you so long?” Jeno wraps around the base of his size with a groan. Stepping into the small space intended for one person only, letting the door shut behind you. Pressing against his body, feet touching trying to squeeze in.
“Jeno.. do you..” You start curiously. Hand hovering at the tip of his cock, eyes lingering over the expanse of chest before you. “..like me?”
Jeno’s eyes beg for mercy, watching your thumb softly graze his slit. Lips pulling in holding back another groan as his cock throbs. “Hate when you tease. You know I can’t stand that shit.”
Jeno turns you quickly, shoving your back forward until you’re bent over the dryer. Ass up and perky, hands slapping down on your exposed cheeks. “Already walk around tempting me to slip in whenever.”
“I think you like it..” your neck cranes, half lidded gaze on Jeno. Hard length beating on your ass, bouncing back with every drop. “..because you like me.”
“Fuck you’re so annoying.” Jeno mutters. Pulling the thin fabric between your cheeks aside. Cock pressing into your entrance, circling around. Only slightly aroused after watching him jerk off for barely a minute. Sighing, laying against the dryer, lips tightened when be pushes in. Jeno groaning behind you with growing frustration. Interrupted every time he’s tried to cum in the last 24 hours. Thrusting impatiently, cock sliding in deep.
“Like fucking you.” Jeno leans over, mumbling into your shoulder. Hips slamming against your ass, legs stiff in place. The little shed compressing you together tightly.
“I know.” Face out of sight, you roll your eyes. Biting down on your lip gripping around Jeno’s cock. He growls against your back, pounding in faster. Eager to chase release, balls tightening up feeling overly full. Completely concentrated on his own pleasure for once. The horny monster he’s been carrying around for over a day taking over. Hand barreling down on your ass, skin slapping together with every deep thrust delivered.
Jeno’s heavy breaths and grunts of exertion interrupted by the sound of heels hitting pavement. Your mothers voice calling your name out, vocals nearing as she walks around the pool.
Eyes widening with panic throwing Jeno a look over your shoulder. Droplets of sweat pooling down to his chin, landing hotly against your back. Low whimpers passing through gritted teeth, glaring toward the door. Head shaking, as his eyes squeeze shut pained. Slowly pulling out of you with a suppressed whimper. He sighs, standing up right. Your mothers voice seconds away from catching you bent over, winking hole desperately seeking your step brother.
Jeno curses to himself tucking away his cock, thinking fast. Grabbing a towel from the pile. Finger hushing you on his lips, exiting the pool house. Panting catching your breath, eyes shutting letting the anxiety and fear wash over you. It was getting old.
“Oh Jeno! What were you doing in there?” Your mothers voice questions. Jeno tugging the towel around his neck.
“Uh.. looking for a clean towel..” he scratches at his head. You stay ducked down inside the pool house watching between the wooden shutters. Wiping off any sweat, drying the tender area between your thighs. Your mom looks less than convinced, glaring at Jeno with interest. Her mouth parting open ready to further question him, head shaking as she moves on.
“Have you seen your sister?” She takes another look around the backyard. “I swore she came out here with you? You two are always together as of late.”
Jeno’s face ducks in, trying to hide his cringing. Hates how often your parents refer to you as actual siblings. He looks around, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly. “She.. you know what..”
Jeno wraps an arm around your moms shoulder, turning her to face toward the neighbors house. Ears listening for any movement behind him. Your moms expression turning confused as Jeno points to the house next door. “I think what they’ve done with their roofing is really great..”
“What are you going on about Jeno? Their roof looks exactly like ours.” Your mom shifts, beginning to turn back toward your house. You quietly make your way out, tip toeing along the hot concrete. Slowly ducked as you walk up behind them.
“What about the roof?” Standing up straight to join in on their conversation. Jeno’s tense frame relaxes, bodies fully turning to face you.
“There you are!” Your mother chides. Disgusts coating her features taking in your appearance. She tugs the towel off of Jeno’s body, wrapping it around you. “Sweetie what have I told you about walking around like this! What will the neighbors think?” She leans in closer, hissing into your ear. “Jeno is a young man! He could get ideas.”
Oh. If only she knew. You gently pry her hands away, holding the towel around yourself. “Yes mother.”
“I was looking for your darling! I have great news.” She pets your head, gaze turning adoring. “Your dad had a meeting today with an old friend. His son Mark just moved back from studying abroad. He’s going to be a doctor you know.”
Jeno’s eyes widen upon hearing Mark’s name. Shoulders stiffening up again, eyes darting between the two of you. Your brows raising with question as to what this has to do with you.
“This Friday Mark will be picking you up for lunch. A date! Isn’t that great!” She continues, face lit up like the sun. “My little girls gonna marry a doctor!”
“Mark Lee??” Jeno spits out abruptly. Familiar annoyance evident in his tone, to you.
“Oh yes, your father mentioned you two used to be the best of friends before he moved away! Ah you’re probably so excited to reunite!” Her arms wrap around Jeno’s waist with a tight hug. “Don’t you worry Jeno, I’m going to find you a pretty girl. Just give me some time!”
You and Jeno share a nervous stare. Hint of worry settling between his brows. Thoughts spinning with ‘what if’ and unknown possibilities.
————————————————————————
“Sweetie you look so pretty! Mark may just fall in love at first sight!” Your mother chirps loudly. Jeno conveniently seated at the couch, reading through some magazine. Or at least doing an awful job at pretending to be. Stare stuck on you being spun around. Jaw grinding roughly gazing at your outfit- when have you ever dressed like that for him?! He mutters under his breath, fingers yanking apart thin magazine pages in anger. Ripping past a few, sure enough receiving a tongue lashing from his father later for ruining with his Sports Illustrated.
“Thanks mom..” you nervously ring your hands. Nervous from Jeno’s intense eyes burning into your skin. Nervous about this blind date with some stranger.
“Now honey, shoulders back! Chest out! Stand up straight! You need to impress Mark! Your fathers depending on this deal with Marks dad to reach his monthly quota. Said he’ll surprise me with a trip to Aruba if he can land this contract! So you better do whatever it takes to make this Mark boy happy.” She implores, fussing with your hair. Adjusting your dress to expose more chest. God, what were you? An escort? With a fast glance Jeno’s way— realizing that’s your step brother you fuck on the regular now, worried about pissing him off with another guy? You may as well be.. what type of cheesy porn plot were you living..
The bell rings throughout the house interrupting your thoughts. Jeno shoots up from the couch, flexing arms shown off in a muscle tank. Shoulders rolling back, jogging forward before your mom has a chance to even speak up. He shouts out, heading for the door— “I’ll get it!”
“That must be him!” Your moms eyes scurry around, hands gripping your shoulders. She leads you down the hall. Watching Jeno pull open the door. Revealing a boy just a bit shorter than him wearing thick framed black glasses. Cheeks rising with an excited smile when he see’s Jeno.
“Oh man! Jeno?! It’s been so long!!” Mark and Jeno slap hands in some type of bro-like high five. Shoulders knocking together with one of those typical man hugs. Mark continues, high pitched voice happily calling out— “Birthday boyy!!”
Jeno laughs, malice deep in that chuckle, known to your ears only. Stare turning to your direction, cheeks sucking in looking you over again. Subconsciously crushing Marks hand in his hold until he let’s out a quiet abrupt squeak. Jeno crushes hard enough until he hears bone cracking, releasing Mark with an apology for not knowing his own strength.
“Hah….yea guess you were always freakishly strong..” Mark rubs at his knuckles. Following Jeno’s gaze. Jaw falling open in a cartoon like way. “Oh wow! No way this is my gorgeous date..”
Your mom shoves you forward, fingers digging into your spine. Smiling awkwardly as you approach Mark. Jeno’s neck cracking all too loud at your sides. The intimidation rolling off of him like powerful waves. Mark admiring you with bright excited eyes. Too distracted with Jeno’s presence yourself to give him your full attention.
“What a handsome young man!” Your mother chimes in. Stepping in front of Jeno, wrapping her boney fingers around Mark’s elbow. “Now you take care of my angel. I’m entrusting her to you!”
“Oh yes Ma’m, of course. You can count on me.” Mark nods. Smiles beaming between the two of them. Trying your hardest to avoid looking Jeno’s way. Vision blurring over from pretending to watch the two of them. Ready to get this stupid date over with.
Mark extends a hand to you. Not the same one he was still secretly nursing at his side. “Shall we?”
With another forced smile, you nod taking a hold of him. Heading out to his car, opening the door for you like a true gentleman. One last glance to the front door as Mark starts up the engine. Your mom smiling ear to ear on the porch.
Jeno behind her like a dark cloud. Eyes full of silent threats.
——————————————————————————
The date with Mark hadn’t been as terrible as you anticipated. Allowing him to take reign of the conversation majority of the time. Pretending to stay interested in what he had to say. Taking extra long chews of your meal throwing in “hmmm” and “ahh” enough to humor him.
“When can I take you out again?” Mark walks you to the entrance of your house. Eyes near bulging out of your skull hearing the question— again?!?
“Oh uh, you have my number right? My schedules all over.” You respond with another forced smile. Hands flailing around to emphasize just how all over it was. During summer? Anything to make it believable.
Unaware of the eyes inside watching from behind a window.
“I’m too eager right? I just..” Mark scratches at his nape, cheeks rising in a smile. “I felt something between us..”
Huh?? Blinking repeatedly, twisting your keys around in hand. Stepping toward the door remembering your mothers words- “Don’t mess this up.”
“It’s ok Mark, I had fun..” you bite down on your lip nervously thinking over how to end this smoothly. Hand behind your back squeezing at the door handle as Mark inches in closer. His hands landing around your head against the frame.
“I have my own place, maybe next time you can come over to mine after?” His brows raise suggestively. Mouth dangerously hovering all too close to yours as shoes bump into each other. Mark leaning in even closer, diminishing the space between your bodies. You blink rapidly, quickly trying to come up with something.
Mark’s hand sliding down, stroking over your hair. Leaned in, breathing over your mouth whispering— “You’re so pretty.. love your lips.”
Mark dips in, thin lips pressing against yours with a moan. You press into the door, knob digging into your lower back. Mouth stiffly gliding against his. Stickiness on your glossy lips making it even more uncomfortable. Mark continues letting out little moans, lower half connecting to yours. Only a centimeter of a gap stopping you from fully touching groins. It wasn’t the worst kiss, no not at all. If anything you were the one making it bad. Guilt running rampant through your mind— not that it should be. Your damn feelings refusing to let that be the case.
“Hope we can see each other again sooner than later..” Mark pulls off only slightly. Huffing out breaths of air between whispered words. His lips now gleaming with evidence of what just took place. You can’t help but notice Jeno’s car parked in the drive way behind Mark’s head. Like some type of unfortunate warning.
“Yea….uh… text me… or yea.” With a stuttered out nod, you jab your keys into the door. Tempted to kick the stupid thing open. Throwing Mark a wave goodbye before running inside. Falling back against it once inside the house. Hand grabbing at your chest with widening eyes. Heart beating furiously— not because of Mark. Not really, more so the fear of getting caught by-
The brooding large figure stepping toward you. Chin tilted in, eyes maddening scowling down at you. Jeno walking forward, hidden by the unlit hallway. Low light coming in from outside crossing his strong infuriated features. Your messy lips parting open, sloppy words attempting to explain.
“Don’t.” One word, one impending word. That raspy word tumbling from his lips meeting your ears. Curling into yourself, limbs beginning to tremble. Jeno placing a hand above your head. Pretty muscles appearing terrifying, in a way you can’t stop yourself from obsessing over. His finger lifting your chin up, to look at him. “You thought I wasn’t gonna find out, didn’t you?”
“No.. It’s not..” you can’t control the whimper breaking your words. Jeno’s looming frame and dark eyes stirring heat inside of you uncontrollably. Why did he have to be so fucking hot when he got like this. It seemed unfair, almost.
“You think I’m stupid. That I don’t know how easy you’ll go spread your legs for anyone. Probably couldn’t wait to try and hop on Mark’s dick once you found out he’s my friend.” Jeno’s intimidation never failing to make you feel like a speck of nothing. Sinister stare blaring into you, hands wrapping around your neck.
Dizzying thoughts broken by the sound of clinking pots and pans traveling down the hall from the kitchen. Jeno’s dads boisterous laughter following, saying something to your mother. Your throat squeezes in fear, gripping around his wrists. Head shaking ‘no’ in plea.
“You can’t.. they’re home..” begging, knowing that look on Jeno’s face can only mean one thing. Imminent smirk slowly appearing on his lips. Yanking you away from the front door, releasing you with a shove into the hallway wall.
“You better be fucking quiet then.” Jeno presses up against you, hissing mean words into your ear. Forcing your front against the wall, memories racing from the last time you’d been here. The first time, how unforgiving and punishing he was. Your forehead rubbing against the scratchy plaster, core igniting with fire. Hard cock grinding into your ass wickedly.
“Jeno, we can’t!” Your hushed whining does nothing to satiate him. Hips jerking up into you aggressively already. Jeno like a caged wolf trying to escape by any means necessary.
“We can. I can. You want to play games right? You’re fucking bored? Don’t even cum when I fuck you anymore?” Jeno’s hips continuously piston upward, fat bulge shoving the material of your dress up.
“J-Jeno..” pitiful cries break between your muted whimpers. “Please… they’ll hear us..”
“I don’t care. Stupid fucking whore.” Jeno licks up your cheek, leaving a trail of saliva. “You better make sure they don’t. Want me to fuck you baby?”
Your eyes glaze over, panting against the wall. Jeno’s hands shoving your dress up to your waist. He nips along your jaw, nose digging into your cheek. “Want me buried deep in that cunt don’t you? Answer me.”
Your core throbs at his words, desperation and need for Jeno turning you into a useless mess. Eyes shutting nodding slowly, with a soft cry whining out— “ple..please fuck me.”
“That’s what I thought baby.” All you can hear over your parents voices just down the hallway was Jeno’s belt unbuckling. Zipper slowly pulling down, heartbeat racing in your ears from nerves and excitement. If they heard you two…the outcome could not end well. He didn’t seem to give a fuck, heavy cock slapping on your cheeks repeatedly. Deep throaty groans mixing in with his thick meat landing on your ass. Knee’s buckling in against the wall, teeth digging into your lip hard enough to draw blood.
Jeno shoves a thigh between yours, pushing you apart. Your lower back instinctively arching out. Muffling words against your ear about what a good little slut you are, always ready to spread open for him.
“You’re so fucking wet. What kind of slut get’s off like this? Letting your step brother fuck you where anyone can see?” Fingers swipe up and down your slit. Wetness drenching Jeno’s fingers, embarrassing loud squelches passing with every rough circle at your entrance. His fingers drag, flicking your clit meanly. Rubbing only for a short moment, smacking taps against the hardening bud.
“Jen…Jeno…pl-please..” you croak out, burning up in embarrassment. Burning up in arousal, thick fingers languidly dragging in the mess between your legs. Jeno’s cock glides between your thighs, folds spreading over his size. Cock head teasing your clit with delicious friction.
Jeno presses lips against your ear again, tongue swirling inside. Hot mouth engulfing you, massaging around. Lapping wet sounds echoing in your drifted mind. Pulling off with a wet smack against your lobe. “Needy slut.”
At last thrusting in, cock splitting you apart in one go. Hips stilling against your ass, steadying himself as your tight heat hungrily sucks him in. Jeno’s forehead rolls around your upper back, feeling delirious savoring your clenching pussy. Hardness pulsating inside of you dying to be unleashed.
“Needed my cock so badly didn’t you baby?” Jeno’s hot words pant inside your ear. Tone laced with possessive intent. His fingers find your mouth, pulling your lower lip free from your teeth. Sliding over your tongue hanging out like you have no control. Exactly how he likes you, fucked to the point of brain emptiness. No thoughts to obscure your stimulation. The only thing on your mind him, the only thing filling you up Jeno’s cock.
“Fuck..” Jeno heatedly gasps against your ear. Sliding out with a strained expression, biting down a throaty growl. Pulling out to the tip momentarily, sheathing deep inside with a roll forward. A shocked loud squeak bursting from your mouth. Eyes widening as Jeno picks up a pace, relentlessly fucking up into you.
“Did you hear that hun?” Your moms vocals reach your ears. Questioning her husband from the kitchen. Tense worry shooting up your spine, hand slapping at Jeno’s hip. Scratching sharp nails across the dip of muscle commanding to stop before you get caught. Jeno’s hand slaps over your mouth, throwing himself into you mercilessly. Quietly screaming into his palm, cock spearing you over and over.
“Always so good for me aren’t you? Pussy always so good for me.” Jeno mutters against your forehead. Cock ramming into you so hard, balls smacking loudly against your ass with every thrust.
Jeno’s pace never falters, as if he was built to ruin you. Continuing to slam into you with ferocity. Hips pounding against you hard enough to bruise. You were only good for him because he was always so good for you.
Silent hisses squeeze through his teeth from the stinging pain your delivering to his lower half. Nails leaving marks behind, light pink and red lines of blood surfacing over skin. Only turning him on further. His teeth sink into the juncture of your neck viciously, muttering against your skin.
“Be. Fucking. Quiet.” The hand covering your mouth jerks with every intense deep thrust. Cock gliding in too deliciously, reaching the depths of your insides. Jeno such a fast learner, figuring out exactly how to make you go mental. How you loved to put up a fight until he fucked you stupid. Feeling limp in his hold, like the little dumb cocksleeve he always managed to turn you into.
Your mother complains about hearing another loud sound. Head shaking under Jeno’s hold, eyes rolling back too far into your skull to give enough of a shit. Jeno growls snapping forward brutally, every slide of his cock stretching you open too damn good. Muffled screams get lost in his palm. Toes scuffing the floor as orgasm rushes through you all too intensely. Jeno squeezing in his lips, face shoving into your neck.
Faintly your moms voice says “I’m gonna go check.”
Jeno bottoms out with each thrusts in. Features squeezing, fucking through your spasming tight heat. Your body shuddering between his and the wall, the only things keeping you held up. Jeno bites down on the back of your neck with a deep groan. Balls squeezing up, mouth shaking as teeth sink into your skin deeply. Cum exploding past your walls— stored up for too long as far as Jeno’s concerned. Teeth sunken into your neck jerking with every spurt of cum released. Your watery eyes squeezing trying to suppress any sounds behind his hand.
Foot steps make their way in closer. Jeno pulling out swiftly, licking at your damaged skin. Moving your hair back to cover any marks left. Panties around your knees lifted back up, squishing uncomfortably against your wrecked swollen core. Cum spilling into the cotton you’d end up throwing away.
“Good girl.” Jeno pecks your chin, moving you both away from the wall. With fast movements, he opens the front door. Your mother rounding the corner just as Jeno finishes tucking himself back in, zipping up discretely.
“Oh sweetie! You’re back already?” She smiles. Eyes scanning you suspiciously. Taking in your less than neat appearance. “Did you let that Mark boy kiss you already?! On the first date!”
Your head shakes, face ducking into your chest. Jeno locking the front door shut, sneering at your side. Technically you had kissed Mark.. technically.
“I want to hear all about it!” She grips your arm, pulling you into an embrace. “Time for dinner anyway kids! Let’s eat and tell me all about how lovely Mark was.”
You scream to yourself, struggling to walk straight by her side. Jeno’s menacing figure at your back, mocking you. Sticky cum reminding you for the next hour what a whore you are.
——————————————————————————-
“A second date?! You agreed to a second date?! What’s wrong with you?” Jeno’s mad. Face heated, veins along his neck pulsating. Fists rolled up into tight balls at his sides, squeezing down to hold in anger.
“Jeno I couldn’t say no! My mom isn’t exactly aware me and you are a thing you know. She said she’s gonna stop paying for my monthly subscriptions if I’m not nice to this Mark guy!” Both of you scream back and forth at each other with your parents out of the house momentarily. What should have been the perfect opportunity to get dicked down turning into a fight. Your mom mentioning on her way out that you’d need a new outfit to impress Mark on your next date. Rage filling up Jeno’s head the minute he heard the words ‘second date’ enthusiastically dripping from your mothers lips.
“Monthly subscriptions?? A fucking monthly subscription is more important than..” Jeno’s head drops back letting out a deep breath. Fingers stretching, cracking knuckles. Rolling his neck back and forth. “You have to come up with something. You need to cancel. I don’t want you anywhere near him again.”
“I can’t do that. You know I can’t do that. Why are you making this into such a big? Quit acting like you’re my boyfriend, we’re just fucking right?” Responding snarky, arms crossing over your chest leaning against your bedroom wall. Jeno’s eyes connect with you, clouded in hostility.
“Again with this boyfriend shit? What do you want from me?” He steps into your space, neck leaning forward. Eyebrow muscles straining with tension. “If this is just to piss me off cause you’re fucking bored with me then say that. Quit wasting my time.”
“Excuse me?” You exasperate, standing up straight. Shoving weakly at Jeno’s sturdy chest. “Wasting your time? Wasting YOUR time? You’ve had me chasing you around for how long now? and still won’t even admit that you like me.”
Jeno scoffs, folding his flexed biceps across his chest now. Turning away, pacing in front of your bed. “You’re never gonna let this shit go are you?” He stops, glaring at the ceiling mumbling to himself. “This was a mistake. Fucked all my friends and I still wanted you.”
“You need to let it go. You deserved that after everything I’ve put up with from you.. you know what just! Just leave me alone! I don’t want to be around you right now.” Groaning to yourself frustrated. Bored with him?! Wasting his time? How fucking dare he—
Jeno scoops you up, hands wrapping around your thighs. Moving swiftly over to your bed, seating with you in his lap. Apologetic eyes searching for yours, typical.. and you caved every freaking time.
“I didn’t handle this correctly..” Jeno’s fingers sweep along your jaw. Pushing hair away from your face. Face pressing in, whispering words over your lips. Voice low and sweet, using that cute side he rarely shows to get his way. “Almost forgot who I was dealing with here..”
He’s fast with manhandling you, always so fast. Aiding the helpless dizzy state of mind only Jeno knows how to get you to. Who were you to deny that this is how you liked it best. Subconsciously begging to be tormented when you agreed to that second date with Mark. You couldn’t say no anyway, but the idea of Jeno taking out his anger on you again making it all the more enticing.
Bending you over, catching a glint of that jealousy in his eye. A reminder that he’d do anything to have you. He didn’t have to try with you, as if you wore underwear around his presence anymore. Just so they could be ruined like the other night again? Jeno willing to remind you who exactly you belong to at any given moment. Waiting for the day he breaks and fucks you without a care in the world for who could end up finding you.
“You think you can just go around kissing whoever the fuck you want?” Jeno has you bent over on his knees. Slapping a heavy hand down on your bared ass roughly. Stinging pain surging up your back with each land. Delivering another smack with hissed angry words. “Why are you such a whore? Don’t I fuck you enough?”
“Jeno!” Your teeth grind together, suppressing another whimpered shout. Jeno’s rough slaps burning into your skin. Pathetic begging does nothing to stop him. Mind repeating the visual of you letting that guy press up against you in a heated kiss. “J-Jeno…you’re being too mean!”
“Am I?” He squeezes at your scolding ass. Fingers digging in harsh enough for scattered bruising to appear by morning. Jeno pulls your cheeks open, spit slowly dripping from his lips. Watching the drool slide down your ass, between your folds. “Nasty whore.. letting anyone and anything get a taste.”
His fingers rub spit between your folds. Circling your winking entrance. Scoffing out a tsk— “I’m too mean, but you’re so wet just like a dumb slut. My dumb slut. Only mine.”
“No Jeno! I’m not yours!” His hand comes to a halt, fingers slipping away. Tongue jabbing inside the side of his cheek.
“What did you just fucking say?” Delivering another thwack across your ass. Jeno growls, pushing you off on to the bed. Screaming out when you land, skin on your backside hot to the touch.
“All that attitude..” Jeno stands, palm digging into your lower back. Belly sinking lower against the mattress. Mounting the backs of your thighs, other hand working his belt buckle open. Your ears attentive to every sound, leather belt strap passing through loops of his jeans. Folding up the belt with one hand easily. The visual alone enough to send a rush of wetness seeping out of you. Jeno’s deep rasp breaking your thoughts with question— “..just begging to be punished.”
You hear the loud crack before the pain settles in. Belt landing down on your cheeks harshly. Ass shaking, soreness moving up your spine. Head jolting up with shock, stinging surge around your lower half. Jeno whipping you repeatedly with his belt. Hand on your lower back moving off, gripping your hair in a viscous tug up. “Whose are you then? Who else fucking does this to you?”
You cry out in response. Thighs squeezing tightly, core begging for any attention. Feet beating on the edge of your bed. Jeno dropping the belt, hand landing on your ass with a tight grip. Fingers digging into meaty flesh, parting you open. Shoving your head forward, suffocating you against the sheets. Coughing cries spewing out between gasped breaths. Jeno releasing you, finger finding your rim. Circling around the tight twitching hole.
“This is mine.” Spit falls from Jeno’s lips slowly. Finger teasing your backside, smearing shining drool around. “Pretty little hole, waiting to be filled with me. Begs for me only.”
Jeno lifts his hand, fingers dragging around his tongue. Coating the appendages in spit nastily. Other hand pulling out his cock, stroking himself to full hardness. Leaking precum already, eyes focused on your spasming hole. Your pretty sobs and whimpers making it all the more satisfying.
“..but you don’t fucking deserve it.” His cock slaps down heavily between your ass. Back arching forward with another shout out. Jeno alternating pressing wet fingers at your puckered rim with smacks of his cock.
“Jeno..” your neck lifts, sobbing wet eyes meeting his over your shoulder. Evil glare sending another shot of hot nerves throughout you. His eyes stay on you, hands slapping your ass. Gripping your cheeks sharply, spreading you open. Both holes glistening in wetness, crying to be touched. Jeno doesn’t look down, hard cock sweeping up and down. Delicious friction making your eyes flutter, tempting to roll up.
“Messy baby. My pretty messy baby.” Jeno licks over his lips. Lustful gaze stirring up heat deep in you. Hard length grinding over your quivering holes. Fingers painfully dug into your ass. Jeno’s hips speeding up, humping your backside with force. Your bed shakes, headboard hitting the wall. Loud enough for anyone listening to figure out what’s happening in your room. Grateful you were home alone.
Jeno leans forward, hands wrapping around your neck from behind. Wildly fucking you down into the bed. Ass bouncing back against his sharp hip bones. Squeals and moans of pleasure constricting in your throat. Jeno’s fingers pressed down hard on your windpipe. Throbbing fat cock hammering thrusts up and down your slicked up holes repeatedly. His tight abs twitching, nearing release with each firm slam down.
Jeno caves, moans passing from his tightened lips. Blending together with the sound of your bed squeaking. Skin slapping against skin loudly as his speed increases faster. Chasing release, using your body. It’s too much even for you, sweet teasing friction pushing you to the edge. Jeno using you like his little fuck toy whose sole purpose is to get him off feeling too good.
“J-Jeno..” your tongue falls out, gasping for air. Jeno’s deathly squeeze cutting off more of your oxygen. Mind clouding over, lower half convulsing. Cumming around nothing, hole desperately pulsing. Wishing for him to fuck you into overstimulation. Hungry to get stretched around his size again, dreaming of aching with soreness.
Jeno groans out noisily, going crazy watching your eyes rolled back- tongue lawled out. Hips stuttering, lifting up with a shout. Neck dropping, cum shooting out vigorously. Flat stomach sinking in, back arching. Cum landing in copious amounts over your spine and ass. Dripping to your craving hole. He screams out curses, hands releasing you. Wiping at his sweaty face. Falling forward breathing heavily, cum smearing between your bodies.
Jeno pants against your forehead, pecking softly at your damp sweating skin. With a tired sigh, he laps at your cheek. Like a puppy leaving you covered in sorrowful kisses. His tone the opposite, quietly hissing into your ear. “Cancel the date.”
——————————————————————————-
“Three thousand for one month, fucking hell...I’m gonna have to kiss dads ass hard.” Jeno curses under his breath scrolling through an app. Jaemin hovered over his shoulder with curiosity.
“That one looks nice! Hey if you let me crash I’ll split the rent with you?” His eyes wiggle around with excitement. Gripping Jeno’s bicep with a shake.
“Dude no. I’m trying to rent this place so I can fuck without interruptions. So tired of pulling out before I can nut.” Jeno pushes him away. Finger continuously sliding across his phone screen in search.
“Parents home too much huh?” Haechan lays back on the bleachers between Jaemins legs. Glasses shifting on the bridge of his nose as his neck drops. “That’s what happens when you’re fucking your step sister you dirty pervert.”
“You know Jeno, three thousand split four ways isn’t half bad. We all hit it anyway..” Renjun joins in, elbowing Jeno’s knee from where he’s seated next to Haechan.
“You fucking assholes seriously need to stop talking about her like that. She only fucked you shrivel dicks to piss me off.” Jeno shuts his phone off growing too irritated with his friends constant taunts about you.
“Hey man, ignore them” Jaemin pats his shoulder, other arm wrapping around Haechans neck with a squeezing choke. “Want me to kill them for you?”
“Dick!” Haechan croaks out, hands pulling at Jaemins forearm currently holding him in a chokehold.
“Don’t act so innocent Jaem, you fucked her even after Jeno asked you not to.” Renjun pipes in, turning around nodding Jeno’s way.
“It’s not like she’s his girlfriend!” Haechans vocals boom out, wiggling free of Jaemins grip. He rubs at his reddened neck, elbowing the stomach behind his head. “Fucking meathead.”
“She’s... we’re taking things slow” Jeno grits, neck veins pulsing with anger. A round of scoffs even from Jaemins lips responding.
“Slow?! You two fucked on webcam in front of us! How is that slow?” Renjuns mouth drops laughing out in disbelief.
“I guess if you compare that to I don’t know? A pizza delivery guy with his cock inside the box on porn hub sure” Haechan and Renjun share a high five joining together in laughter. Jaemins own face ducked into his shoulder with tight lips.
“That was just for you assholes to know she fucked you to get to me. She’s obsessed with me. I’m the one waking up with that slut sucking my dick everyday.” Jeno smacks both of them in the nape. Hisses and pained neck rubs following.
“Obsessed but isn’t even your girlfriend.... right right. Dude I knew she was using me, I’m not an idiot. I was kinda into it! Think she’s the type to slap me around you know.” Haechan leans over, chin perched on Jeno’s knee. “Come on dude, it’s not like we’ve never shared. We all know jealousy gets your dick all hard.”
“That’s kinda gay bro” Renjun places his chin along Jeno’s other knee, smile stretched out across his face. “But the part about getting slapped around.. I wouldn’t mind feeling used again honestly.”
“Only one that’s gonna be slapping anything is me.” Jaemin adds, chin returning to Jeno’s shoulder. “You too of course man.”
“I’m never gonna let you idiots touch her again.” Jeno stands abruptly, jerking them all away in surprise. Shoulders tight and flexed turning to stomp away.
Jeno questioning to himself if you even deserve any of this anymore. Groaning as he settles in his car, head resting against the steering wheel. Of course you deserve this, he’d give you anything you want- that he could realistically come through with. That was the problem, you were too hard headed to see where he was coming from.
A month alone, just the two of you.. would be magical. Uninterrupted without having to worry about parents, friends. Just the two of you finally able to be yourselves, enjoy each other to the fullest. You both deserved this.
Jeno unlocks his phone scrolling back to the beach villa. Highly aware he still wasn’t fully capable to afford this on his own, but choosing to worry about that later. Even if it meant putting it on credit in the mean time, it’d be worth it. He finalizes the online contract agreeing to all the house owners rules. Hitting the last options before reading that he’s booked the villa.
Excitement passes through him like the engine coming to life in his car. Tapping at the steering wheel overly excited, picturing your face once he surprised you with the news.
——————————————————————————-
“Why are you all dressed up?” Jeno enters your room. Happy smile faltering from his face a little. Eyes taking in the tightly form fitting all too short dress barely covering your body. Phone in hand ready to surprise you with perfect summer plans. “We’re not…we don’t have plans right?”
You let out a sigh, opening up a tube of lip gloss. Eyes shifting back and forth in the mirror. Looking at Jeno’s confused expression, looking at your own worried one.
“No…we….we don’t..” turning to face him, you step in close. Hands wrapping around Jeno’s waist. Bouncing on your feet with fear, hesitation. “Jeno.. promise me you won’t get mad..”
Jeno’s brows lift in question. Stressed forehead muscles showing more concern than he voicing out. “Why would I be mad?”
“..I have another date..with Mark..” you start, Jeno immediately shoving you off of his body. Taking steps back, face coated in disgusts.
“You’re joking. You have to be fucking joking.” His worry instantly turning to anger. Fists rolling tight at his sides. “I told you to cancel.”
“and I told you I can’t do that!” You hiss out, parents just downstairs.
Jeno’s phone burns in his pocket, anger racing throughout his system. Remembering the fine print in the contract- no refunds. His hands lift up, growling pissed off. Smacking the sides of his head.
“I’m so fucking stupid for trusting you.” His eyes squeeze shut, fuming all over.
“Jeno it’s not a big deal! I don’t even like him!” You huff, trying to pull his hands away. Worried he’ll hurt himself. Jeno rips away from you shaking his head.
“What about my friends? Did you even like them?!” The question leaves you silent. Lips parting ready to argue and defend yourself. Jeno’s hurtful glare sending pinches throughout your chest. Ugly sickness coiling in your gut. The fun of it all diminishing quickly.
“I like you.” Your face drops, guilt drenching over you. Awkwardly rubbing your arm, a different type of humiliation sinking into you.
Jeno scoffs, opening your door to leave. “No. You really don’t.”
——————————————————————————
“The deposit for the beach villas non-refundable. Fuck, I’m an idiot. I was starting to trust her..” Jeno’s head drops, ripping at chunks of hair frustrated.
“That’s no problem dude. We’ll help you pay the rest. An entire month at the beach? You’ll be so deep in ass, won’t even remember what she looks like anymore.” Jeno’s three best friends nod, patting his back with reassurance.
“What’d she do anyway?” Haechan returns his focus to the tv screen. Fingers jabbing at the controller in his hands, thumbs shifting left and right. Jeno groans, head falling back on the couch. Haechan sitting on the floor between his legs. All of them gathered in Jaemin’s basement playing, Renjun and Haechan currently attempting to kill each other in Mortal Kombat. 
Jeno drove over here after abandoning you, probably on your date anyway. Yelling at himself while angry sad music blasted from his car speakers on the way over. Repeating over how could he be so stupid, how could he think anything good could come out of this thing you two had going. His own fault for thinking his childhood.. crush, obsession, whatever it was, meant anything.
“You guys remember Mark right?” Jeno sighs, can’t get the image of you and Mark kissing out of his head. Fists ripping a hole into the punching bag at the gym last night just thinking about it.
“Oh dude yea, he’s back huh? I ran into him the other day, he was rushing though. Picking up flowers for a date or some shit.” Haechan responds, head nudging Jeno’s knees. Screaming at Renjun for cheating as the tv speakers yell out a menacing “FINISH HIM!”
“You’re fucking dead!” Renjun laughs out. Blocking the pillow Haechan starts hitting him with. “Sore loser.”
“What about Mark?” Jaemin asks, leaning into Jeno’s side on the couch.
“Yea well…..she was his date. She’s actually on a date with him right now.”
Three wide eyes look at Jeno, jaws flying open with a simultaneous round of “WHAT?!”.
Jeno runs a hand through his hair. Headache starting after hours of overthinking. Hates how he can’t stop thinking about you. Hates thinking about any of this shit at all. “Her mom set them up. Marks dads some CEO, I don’t know some bullshit deal my dads trying to lock at work. Something stupid. Dating’s bad enough as it is, but she kissed him.” 
“Aw man.. I guess you should have assumed..” Jaemin rubs his neck, contemplating the situation. Always Jeno’s more logical-reasonable comrade. “She.. wasn’t ever really innocent.”
“You can take the hoe off the streets, but can’t take the street out of the hoe.” Haechan shrugs.
“Can’t make a hoe a housewife I believe is the saying.” Renjun adds in, chin nodding.
“We know you liked her bu-..” Jaemin begins, Jeno glaring at him before interrupting.
“I don’t fucking like her! We just fuck cause.. convenience.”
The three friends share a knowing look, mouths opening and shutting. Haechan letting out a low whistle, turning to face Jeno.
“You’re right dude. Pussy is pussy though. We’re gonna be at the beach next week, she won’t even exists to you anymore. Bikinis? Tan lines? Wet titties? You’re gonna be neck deep in pussy. All of us will be!” Haechan cheers, high fiving Jaemin.
“It’ll be our fun party boys summer finally. Our coming of age moment or some shit.” Renjun nods, adding to Haechan’s speech.
“Think I came of age Freshman year when I was getting my first hand job in the janitor’s closet.” Jaemin throws in.
“I was there. Unfortunately. In her other hand.” Renjun grimaces. “Wonder whatever happened to that girl…made us both cum..”
Jeno groans, growing irritated with their banter. “Whatever, you guys have money right?” 
His friends all answer yes in response, whipping out their phones to send payment directly to Jeno’s bank account.
“Fun party boy summer! Fuck yea!” 
————————————————————————
It was in fact- not the fun party boy summer. It was the fun party boys and sulky moody emo Jeno. Scaring off more girls with his miserable state of mind than anything. Sleeping in hours upon days. Snapping at his friends efforts to cheer him up. Refusing to hook up with any of the girls they picked up after beach activities. More depressing than anything, like a black cloud raining on the fun party boy parade.
“We should have a party.” Jaemin floats around the backyard pool. Haechan and Renjun sitting to the side with their feet dipped in.
“We’ve been having parties.” Renjun groans, nursing a hangover with an ice pack on his forehead.
“No I mean like…” Jaemin sighs. “I hate seeing Jeno like this. He’s gonna regret it, you know he is.. we should get his fucking step sister out here. He can say he doesn’t like her but.. what the fuck dude!” His head shakes, droplets pouring off wet hair. Stating the obvious, the unspoken. Whether they discuss it or not, all aware of what’s really happening here.
“He’s totally gonna regret it. What are we supposed to do though? I don’t talk to her..” Renjun interjects. Sitting up on his elbows, sunglasses sliding down the bridge of his nose.
“Wait a minute..” Haechan sits up next to him, toes wiggling around in the water. Unlocking his phone. “I still have her added! I’ll tell her to come over.. wait no. What if she won’t cause of Jeno?”
“That’s a good point..” Wheels in Jaemin’s head spin, trying to concoct a plan. Wet fingers snapping, hand splashing into the water. “Mark! Invite Mark! Tell him to bring a date!”
“Is that.. really a good idea?” Renjun’s brow lifts. Imagining the terrible scenarios that could ensue if both you and Mark show up together.
“What else are we gonna do? Look once they show up, we’ll separate them. Distract Mark and Jeno can go get his dick wet. Get him to stop acting like a fucking brat. It’s too much dude! He blew up on my hook up last night for using the bathroom! She left before I even got it in!” Jaemin growls in frustration. He loves Jeno he does, but the lack of maturity was becoming exhausting. Ruining his summer fun, all of theirs.
“Might as well right?” Haechan pulls up Mark’s account while Jaemin’s talking, sending him a direct message. “Mark said he’d love to come over by the way.”
“I really don’t think this is a good idea..” Renjun voices. Lips pouting together in concern.
“What could go wrong?”
——————————————————————————
“Why do we ever fucking listen to you Haechan!” Jaemin hisses, finger jabbing at the other man. Not one to typically lose his cool, currently beyond stressed out after Jeno blew up at them. “What could go wrong? What could go wrong! What could go fucking wrong! Ugh!”
Haechan scoffs, drying off his hair with a towel. Unsuccessful in dodging Jeno’s brutal toss into the pool. Landing like a huge canon ball, splashing water on half of the party attendees. No complaints since it was starting to look like a girls gone wild compilation. “Dude! It’s not my fault Jeno’s such an asshole.”
“I literally said this wouldn’t be a good idea. You guys never listen to me! We have to stop giving in to Haechan.” Renjun implores, adding another finger poking into Haechan’s damp stomach. Yea, that wasn’t going to happen.
Haechan rolls his eyes, averting his attention to where you’re bent over. Ass grinding up against Mark behind you, looking like he’s having the time of his life. Not that you’re aware or probably care at all. Your gaze stuck on Jeno across the deck. Pacing back and forth by the pool. Shushing every girl approaching him, even throwing out “fuck off” with the all too persistent ones.
“She’s such a whore” Haechan laughs, impressed really. “We have to get Mark out of here or something man. Jeno looks like he’s about to pop a vessel. He’s exhausting, deciding to have feelings all of a sudden!”
“Definitely- if we keep letting this happen. I’m his emergency contact in case we need to call 911.. but if he kills Mark before his neck bursts- I can’t help him.” Jaemin shrugs. Attempting to make light of the situation, eyes shifting around nervously none the less. Completely understands why Jeno would be pissed, maybe not this angry- since he “doesn’t like you” and all.
“They’re both crazy, it’s.. romantic in some low budget coming of age teen film type of way. Ours was shooting our loads together in a smelly janitors closet. Jeno’s.. is fucking his step sister.” Renjun grimaces, head tilting side to side. Watching you and Mark bump uglies awkwardly around groups of girls in bikinis. Awkward because no one else is dancing.. just you two. “Maybe that’s all of our coming of age story… we all.. fucked her. God, how are we still alive?”
“Dude you’re so weird.” Haechan’s face turns serious, slowly blinking at Renjun. Eyes shutting letting out a tired huff. He grips Jaemin’s shoulders, pulling them back in a stretch. “Listen, you’re his best butt buddy..”
“Fuck you.” Jaemin shoves him off. Haechan’s smile reappearing.
“Buy me dinner first. I’m not as easy as Jeno’s step sister.” Corners of his mouth lift pleased, lowly muttering to Jaemin. “Go distract Mark somehow. We’ll work on her once you separate them.”
“Why do I have to go with you?” Renjun questions Haechan, losing trust in him by the minute.
“It’s funnier this way.” Haechan drags Renjun away, fingers snapping Jaemin’s direction. “Get to work!”
Jaemin groans, cursing Haechan in his mind. Imagining hands around his neck choking him until he passes out. Enjoying the idea too much with a smile on his face, feet leading him to Jeno.
“What the fuck are you smiling about?” Jeno snarls. Shoulders all rounded and flexing, appearing more intimidating than usual. Eyes squinted in a furious glare, only sparing Jaemin a glance for a second before returning to you. “Can’t fucking believe you idiots invited her. Of course she came with Mark, anything to piss me off.”
“Technically..” Jaemin ponders before finishing his sentence. “Haechan invited Mark… and well.. we didn’t uh, anticipate a guest..”
Jeno’s hand shoots up, halting in Jaemin’s face. “Enough. Go tell her she needs to leave. Mark too, I can’t pretend right now.”
Jaemin’s mouth falls open with displeasure. Half a mind to tell Jeno off.. but knows better than to poke at a lion hunting it’s prey. Thinking fast yet again, his fingers snap with an idea.
“I’m gonna fix this Jeno.” He searches for a cooler, scooping up a can of beer. Crisp bubbling sound ticking with a pull on the tab. Stumbling his way over to you and Mark.
Marks eyes trained on your ass, yours practically reflecting Jeno’s image. Jaemin anxiously taking a sip hoping this works.
“Ah, Mark Leeeeeeeee” he falls forward, arm hanging off of Mark’s neck. He drawls out with a big dumb smile- “I’m sooo fucking drunk Mark Leeeeee.”
“Woah there buddy” Marks eyes widen, arms wrapping around Jaemin’s waist. Helping him stand up straight. “Maybe it’s time to lay off the drinks.”
“Ahhh, I really need to. Jeno’s all mad cause we ran out of his favorite white claw flavors.” He tosses a nod at Jeno’s seething form. Mark awe struck his friend could get so angry over something so minuscule. “I need to drive to the store and get him some moreee.”
“Dude no way! You can’t drive like this!” Mark looks at you, arms crossed over your chest staring Jeno down. “I’ll go.. I haven’t drank since I drove. You wanna come with?” He asks you. Jaemin stealing glances your way praying you say no.
“Uhm. No thanks.” Score, of course your bratty ass played right into the palm of his hand. Lower lip sucking in to hide the triumphant smile wanting to show itself.
“Alright, I’ll be right back!” Mark leans forward for a kiss. Quickly turning, lips landing against your ear squishily.
“Sure whatever” wiping at your ear as discretely. Jaemin catching it out of the corner of his eye, thanking Mark as he mumbles about how cute you are playing hard to get. He slumps over, watching him exit out through the backyard entrance, spinning toward you in one quick motion.
“You.” Jaemin’s fingers snap, gripping your elbow. He drags you along, crossing the deck. “Tired of you and Jeno’s bullshit.”
“What the fuck, let me go!” You screech out, scratching nails down Jaemin’s arm. His lips pouting out with a sarcastic hiss.
“Don’t think I’ve forgotten you like to mark up and claw.” He finishes with a wink, your mouth parting open. Stopping abruptly in front of Jeno.
“Jaemin. What. The. Fuck.” Jeno grits, refusing to look at you now. As if his eyes haven’t been on you since arriving over an hour ago.
“Marks gone dude!” Jaemin shoves you into Jeno. Hands lifting up landing against his chest. Palms covering Jeno’s pecs. One of your brows lifting suggestively.
He growls, gripping you wrists- removing your touch. Skin burning hot where you’d just been. “Don’t fucking touch me. Those hands belong to Mark now.”
Stumbling back, landing against Jaemin’s chest. He steadies you with hands on your waist. Tingles bursting inside, maybe from Jeno.. definitely from Jeno..
“Jeno.” Your eyes roll back far enough to remind Jeno of the last time he saw you like that. Hand twitching at his side with temptation to bend you over and slap your ass violently for all to see.
“Why are you even here? When are you going to stop?” Jeno’s gaze hides something pained. Like a wounded puppy in fear, putting up a front to protect itself. Doing something to your heart, choosing to shove whatever that is aside and continue ignoring it.
“When am I going to stop?! When are you going to stop! You know I had no choice. Mark’s not my boyfriend…” hesitating for a moment. Prideful conscience getting the best of you. “..and neither are you.”
Jeno’s lip curls up, baring teeth. Chest protruding forward in a symbol of dominance. Silently telling you whose really in control here. Head tilted down, eyes louder than words, tearing you apart.
“You know how many girls here would beg for me to even look at them? What haven’t I fucking given you? What the fuck else do you want from me?” Jeno scolds. Hand instinctively gripping your chin. Thumb swiping across soft skin momentarily. Triggering memories Jeno would rather forget. Jaemin’s brows furrow standing at your sides, wondering if it’s time to make his exit.
“I want you. I want all of you.” Your eyes fall shut, embarrassed to admit it out loud. The last three weeks without Jeno around driving you to a breaking point. Finding yourself crying into his pillow one too many nights. Why did you have to accept a reality you knew could be avoidable if you both just tried.
“That’s too bad.” Jeno shoves your face away roughly. Jaw clenching and twitching where his cheeks sink in. “I don’t want a lying whore.”
He turns away, back muscles taunting you. Fervor taking over, Jaemin’s mouth dropping. You barreling forward, throwing your body weight into Jeno. Catapulting him flying into the pool.
“Fuck you Jeno!”
——————————————————————————-
“They’re both really immature.” Renjun tsks. Watching Jeno towel off. An audience full of scantily clad women surrounding him. Not really giving them the attention they deserve, but clearly enjoying the praise. Knowing it’s driving you crazy, probably stirring ideas in your head of what he’s been up to the last few weeks. If only any of them were true.
“Why’s he always gotta be such a dick? What does he want? He won’t fuck any of the girls we bring back. Now he’s pissed we got his sister here..” Haechan scoffs. Hands busy behind the little bar set up by the pool mixing a drink. Renjun sighs, leaning in on his elbow.
“Step sister, when you just say sister it’s kind of weird. After what we all had to watch..” he rubs his sweaty nape with a smirk. Other hand snapping at Haechan for a beer.
“Don’t act like you didn’t like it. You came faster than all of us.” Haechan lets out an appeased laugh. Pouring golden bubbly liquid into a red cup. Under his breath, he whispers quietly “wonder why.”
“Fuck you dude, talk about Jeno being a dick.” Renjun snatches the cup out of Haechan’s hands, sniffing the contents cautiously. All too familiar with his stupid pranks by now.
“Renjun.. hear me out.. if he’s not gonna fuck her..” Haechan’s brows lift suggestively. Eyes darting back and forth between where you stand. Tension evident in your body language as irritation overcomes you the longer Jeno ignores your presence. “Been awhile since me and you shared right?..”
“Haechan, he almost killed us once already. You really want to risk that chance again for some pussy?” Renjun leans back, contemplation passing his eyes none the less.
“You know it wasn’t just some pussy. Love me a good freaky bitch.” Haechan’s grin grows. Sipping alcohol through a straw, having started early today. Slight buzz reaching his head already. Maybe with a clearer state of mind he wouldn’t dare test Jeno again- yea right.
“We’ve been 6 feet deep in ass since we got here. You just love to piss him off dude.” Renjun stands up from the bar stool, hands smoothing down his t-shirt. “I’m not completely opposed to the idea though..”
“You act like Jeno doesn’t deserve it. Look at him seething away over there like some big baby. He needs to learn his lesson already, just cause he’s hot and has chiseled abs doesn’t mean he should always get what he wants.” Haechan says shooting a lazy glare Jeno’s way.
“You have to stop watching those enemies to lovers movies. You’re one more hour of Jeno walking around shirtless away from proclaiming your undying love.” Renjun responds with a disgusted tone. Tossing back the rest of his drink. Combination of summer heat and alcohol causing sweat to pool in the crevices of his body.
“Whatever..” Haechan laughs to himself, finishing the rest of his drink off. With a spin, he grabs two cans of beer making his way out from behind the bar. “You in or what?”
Renjun sports a hesitant smile, eyes bouncing between you and Jeno. He should know better by now than to let Haechan talk him into these messes. Against his moral judgment, he nods, smile spreading wider into his cheeks. “If we get caught, I’m blaming it all on you.”
“We’re not gonna get caught. Jeno’s too busy pretending she doesn’t exists.” With a roll of his shoulders, and an elbow nudged into Renjun’s side they make their way over to you. “Act cool. Don’t make it obvious.”
Renjun scoffs, stepping ahead of Haechan. If anyone knew how to be inconspicuous out of the four of them, it’s him.
“Why are you standing here all alone? Are we not friends now?” He steps into your space under the roofs ledge where you’re trying to catch shade. Pulling a can of beer from Haechan’s clutches, earning a scoff. “We got that sugar free kind, girly spritzer stuff? You thirsty?”
“First off- ew, we are not friends. Second off- why would you idiots invite me to this party?” You spit out, snatching the can from his hands. Haechan’s expression turning amused over Renjun’s shoulder muttering- “Should have let me handle this one.”
“God she’s just like Jeno..” Renjun tucks his chin into his shoulder whispering to Haechan. Face turning back to you quickly with a kind smile. “Let’s be friend then? You’re here right? We all know each other well.”
“You know fucking doesn’t equate to friendship right?” Your tone laced in annoyance. Hand swatting at mosquitos circling around you. Haechan’s eyes light up, the bulb in his mind sparking to life.
“Bug spray!” He shouts out, a little too enthusiastically. “We have bug spray inside.. come on let’s get you some before you turn into a mosquito feast.”
Renjun looks at him with confusion. Haechan motioning for you both to step inside the house. Majority of the party goers outside by the pool- a pool party after all. He throws Renjun a look indicating ‘I got this’, glancing over his shoulder to make sure Jeno doesn’t spot the three of you. You make your way inside, Haechan placing a hand on your lower back.
“Still can’t believe Jeno ruined your summer plans over something so petty..” Haechan mumbles, throwing another knowing look at Renjun behind your back. You take in the gorgeous beach house, anger building up inside of you the more you think about it. Unable to stop yourself from picturing all the surfaces Jeno could have been fucking you into mindlessness on.
“He’s so immature.” You sigh, slumping against Haechan’s hand. Renjun nods in return, wrapping himself around your arm.
“You have no idea. He’s just lucky we all agreed to help him pay this off.” Renjun bites back his smile. Leading you down the hall toward their bedrooms.
“I know you guys are like besties, but Jeno’s just..” your hands shoot up, groaning in frustration. “Why would he even bother to rent this place out for us. It’s like like I wanted to go out with that Mark guy!”
“Oh I know..” Haechan pauses, turning you to face him. “He told us all about it.” He tsks, head shaking.
“He can be such an asshole right?” Renjun strokes your arm up and down, free hand brushing hair off your shoulder. You slump into his pets, soft warm hands sweeping up and down your bare skin.
“You need to get back at him, give him a taste of his own medicine.” Haechan’s tone deepens. Hands finding their way to your hips. “Let us help you.”
“Help me?” Your eyes widen, Haechan’s lust filled gaze pulling you in. This can’t happen again, or can it..
“Jeno abandoned you for weeks to come fuck around out here with us. He doesn’t deserve anything from you.” Renjun leans into your ear with a hushed tone. Fingers finding the tie on your bikini bottom, toying with the strings.
“I think it’s only the right thing to do..” Haechan slides a hand down your fluttering bare stomach. Fingers reaching for strings on the other side of you. His mouth falls open comically, pulling the tied knot free.
“Wait..” you look around the hallway with slight panic. Thighs squeezing together, clenching the fabric of your bottoms between you. “Here? Isn’t this..”
“What? You’re shy all of a sudden?” Renjun bites your earlobe, tugging free the other knot. Bikini bottoms betraying you as they fall to your feet. Eyes drifting down, toes kicking the cloth aside. Stomach heating up, fiery heat coiling around inside of you.
“I’m not.. I just.. what if he..” Swallowing, head tilting as Renjun’s tongue slides down your neck. Soft lips leaving hot pecks on your burning skin.
“What if he what?” Haechan clasps your chin, eyes blazing with intent. “Jeno deserves this..” fingers drag down your neck, between your chest. Lips pulling back, sucking air through teeth. “You deserve this.”
A whimper passes between your lips, legs trembling holding you up. Haechan’s head tilted down, hand slowly stroking between your abdomen. Eyes look up, half lidded and menacing. Fingers sliding in-between your squeezed thighs, tapping at your clit.
“Don’t you?” The questions dangerous, almost threatening. Biting down on your lip as Renjun’s teeth dig into your neck, humming in agreement. His fingers running along the dip in your back. Giving in you nod rapidly, cocky smirk on Haechan’s lips spreading.
“That’s right. Nasty little whores like you love getting fucked where anyone can watch.” Haechan’s grin grows. Fingers gliding between your folds. “As expected, dripping wet.”
“Let me” Renjun steps in front of you, lips pouted with a sheen of spit. Lust hazy filled eyes racking across your body. He swiftly falls to his knees, arms wrapping around your thighs.
“I got you” Haechan steps behind you, arms wrapping around your waist. “He loves to eat.”
Renjun’s face dips down, nose shoving between your shaking thighs. One of Haechan’s hands squeezes your hip, landing a smack loud enough to echo against the walls.
“Stop acting shy, that pussy’s hotter than my ps4” lips drag across your nape. Teeth skimming down skin, tongue lapping at your shoulder. Hips jolting forward Renjun’s nose pressing against the hood of your clit.
Sandwiched between their bodies has your temperature rising quickly. Haechan pressing flat against your backside. Licking the top of your back, tongue languidly dragging up and down your spine. Renjun pulls your thigh forward onto his shoulder, you tense up reluctant to relax your body weight against him.
Haechan slaps your hip again, firm hand landing on your ass after. “Stop acting innocent, where’s that whore that begged for cock in front of all of us huh?” He hisses against your ear, hips thrusting forward against your lower half with emphasis.
Pathetic whimpers fall from your lips, body slumping as you release control giving in. Renjun’s eyes shine bright below you, cheeks bunched up with eagerness. His jaw stretching open, mouth enveloping you mound. Hot tongue forcing between your wet folds. Loud sounds of wetness burning at the tips of your ears.
“That’s more like it, dirty slut” Haechan lets out a laugh, teeth digging into the crevice of your neck. “You gonna let me fuck this ass?” Fingers reach between you, tips circling your clenching up hole. Gasping in surprise, instinctively rolling forward against Renjun’s mouth.
“Fuck..” your eyes squeeze shut, biting down a moan. Tongue finding it’s way to your entrance, moans shivering up your core.
“Ride his tongue baby, he loves that shit” Haechan slaps your ass again. Finger prodding at your backside. Mouth marking up your neck with endless licks, sucking and biting over every expanse of flesh. Haechan thrusts forward, Renjun’s tongue gliding inside with a firm wiggle. He doesn’t stop thrusting, finger running up and down between your cheeks. Face growing hotter as you speed up, neck dropping back against Haechan’s shoulder.
“Feel good? Come on, tell him how it feels.” He hisses meanly into the back of your ear, teeth nibbling.
“Yes! Oh fuck, yes yes” eyes dropping open, the ceiling spinning above succumbing to the pleasure. Renjun knows what he’s doing, hands squeezing around your thighs. Tongue relentlessly working away inside of you. The combination from Haechan’s torment and Renjun’s stimulation too much. Haechans fingers not giving your ass a break, hole fluttering against him with each pass.
“Dirty slut..” he mutters, reaching around you. Hand sliding down your stomach. Your eyes follow the motions, head dropping forward. Eyes locked on Renjun’s squinted crazed look. Practically fucking down on his mouth. His head moving up and down with each thrust of his tongue inside.
“I’m..o-oh..oh fuck…stop stop!” You squeal out. Still too aware of your surroundings trying to control your vocals. Haechan smirks behind you, hand swiping down. Thumb pressing at your clit.
“Gonna cum?” He presses down on your clit. Roughly circling it, working you from both ends. Your head shakes, waist curling forward in his hold.
“No! I’m… I’m gonna..oh f-fuckk” your face contorting tightly. You grind down on Renjun’s tongue, legs shaking around him. Body jumping forward, squirting out past his tongue. He groans beneath you, eyes falling shut in ecstasy. Continuing to work away, licking all over your drenched folds. Heavy sounds of slurping mixing in with your panted drawn out moans.
Foot steps sound around as they reach closer, stepping into the hallway. Bottoms of feet pattering down on the wooden floor approaching. Moans and a tongue swirling in your ear much louder. Distracting you from hearing any warning. A displeased huff of shock paired with a deep voice breaking your thoughts— “Are you two fucking serious right now?”
Haechan let’s out a cocky laugh, shoving wet fingers inside your mouth. Tongue eagerly licking at the taste of yourself. “Yea we’re fucking serious man. Dude you’re supposed to be distracting Jeno. Go away.”
“Fuck you Haechan.” Jaemin walks further in. Renjun standing up straight, using the back of his hand to clean his mouth. Chin dripping with your squirt, shirt looking like he got caught in a water gun battle.
“Already told you, dinner first.. but since you’re here..” Haechan shoots Jaemin a wink. Tongue lapping over your heated face with his shit eating smirk.
“When you said work on her, I didn’t know you meant fuck her!” Jaemin snaps. Your thighs clenching shut around Haechan’s returning hand. Jaemin too close now, overwhelming emotions running rampant surrounded by all three of them. Eyes unable to not linger over his broad defined chest. Trimmed waist taunting you, abs leading down to his swim trunks. Hiding something you’ll never be able to forget.
“Oh.. I think she likes you Jaemin..” he taunts, thumbing your sensitive clit. Wetly whispering  against your ear - “Little whore loves getting stretched out by a fat cock huh? Bet you love aching in pain the next day. Limping around, getting turned on every time you try to sit, hissing in pain.”
Fuck, he read you like a book. Pitiful moans slipping from your lips. Renjun licking at your other ear, fingers maneuvering around Haechan’s hand. Playing along your slit, coating in slick pouring from your entrance. Successions of whined moans drawing out as they both stimulate you. Haechan’s movements hard, abusing your clit. Renjun soft, treating your hole with the utmost tenderness. Asking for permission to be let in with his ministrations. Allowing your body to open up for his fingers before gliding in. Whatever you’d been upset about long drifted out of your mind by now.
“Is that what you like?” Renjun encourages you to speak up, nose nudging your chin. Fingers making way inside you. Scissoring apart open easily, wet walls expanding around him. Needy whimpers betraying your cool and careless facade. Succumbing completely to their touches and words. Jeno’s right— you really are a whore.
Jaemin adjusts his growing size, swim trunk fabric turning uncomfortable the longer he stands there watching. Why was he standing there just watching after all? It’s not like Jeno hadn’t been a dick the last few weeks. Even ruining his chance at getting ass last night. Blaming that for why he was chubbing up so fast. Watching you transform into some horny slut, thirsting to be impaled on cock. Curiously wondering if it even mattered to you whose cock it was. Didn’t seem to make a difference with the way you raced through each of them like nothing.
Haechan stares him down, watching Jaemin consider his options. What if Jeno finds out? But what if he doesn’t find out? How did they end up in this situation again? Only all at once- wait three dicks..three holes.. Haechan’s eyes roll, as if he can hear Jaemin’s thoughts. Calculations exciting him when the idea sparks that one of those holes is in your ass. Always the silent worrying type, trying to resolve a logical conclusion. Logic- don’t fuck her, go tell Jeno and let him deal with this. High chance of blood shed and ambulances in that scenario though. Less logical- oh my god I’m gonna fuck her in the ass.
His fingers lift, snapping noisily by your head. Waving in the direction down the hall. “My room, none of this hallway easy to get caught shit. Thought you two had more brain power than this. Well.. Renjun at least.”
“Hey, who do you think master minded all of this?” Haechan scoffs. Hand slapping down on your exposed ass. “You heard him, bedroom.”
You turn, hazily stepping forward. A large hand landing on your shoulder, sending waves of shock down your back. Jaemin brushes up against you, domineeringly whispering in your ear- “did I tell you to walk?”
With a rough shove down, your knees hit the floor. Looking over your shoulder, sat on all fours. The three of them standing above you shooting tingles up your core. Hooded eyes gazing at you with excitement, intrigue, disdain. All things that made you quiver, knee’s buckling against the floor. Jaemin crouches down, dark subtle smirk taking over his features.
“Crawl, like a good little bitch.”
Tears rush to the backs of your eyes, heated humiliation burning you up. Languidly dragging your palms and knees ahead. Satisfied sighs and grunts behind you, watching your ass spread open. Jaemin’s hands rubbing together imagining how soon he’ll be deep in you. Ready to give you something to whine and cry about. The room at the end of the hall seeming further and further away. Knees aching against hard wood. Sucking it up, because you are a good little bitch. With a tear dripping off your chin passing the threshold, you finally make it to his room.
A simple boy room, lingering scent of fresh laundry flooding your sense as you crawl inside. One too many speakers set up on the nightstand. A mint hoodie strewn over a chair in the corner. Curtains mostly shut, letting in only a few streaks of light across the bed. A bed for sure big enough for all four of you, and some.
You tumble forward, squealing out when Jaemin’s hand comes down hurdling across your ass. Skin aflame, prickling heat burning across your backside. Haechan was bad enough already, cunt convulsing between your legs remembering how much worse Jaemin was going to be.
“Ah, you’re no better than Jeno. Always too mean.” Renjun sinks down by your feet. Hand caressing your heated cheeks with a tender massage, pulling you spread apart. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a girl get this wet before. Fuck.”
“Never did like sharing with Jeno. Always had to turn everything into a competition.” Jaemin drawls out, tugging open his drawstrings. Haechan settles on the floor, tracing over your spine.
“Don’t pull that monster out yet. Let us have fun first. You’re gonna tire her out.” Haechan tells Jaemin, tapping his hands away from removing his bottoms.
Jaemin scoffs, shutting the door to his room. Conveniently enough, no locks on the doors in this house. He strides over to the bed, sitting on the ledge. “Only if you get that ass stretched and ready for me.”
Renjun makes a face at Haechan, hands holding you open. Eyes on your rim, something he too often thinks about while getting off. Shaking his head, he lets you go, dragging light scratches over the backs of your thighs. He leans into Haechan, whispering— “I can’t do it. Probably tastes like Jeno.”
You scoff below them, catching his words. Haechan shushing you with a squeeze to your ass.
“Don’t worry pretty. I love eating ass.” Haechan grips your inner thigh. Sweltering hand burning your skin. Arousal has him tenting hard, damp board shorts stretched over his cock. He manhandles you onto your back, fingers tracing up your stomach. Slowly blinking down at you, running his hand back and forth. Small touches spinning wheels in your gut, abdomen twitching under every touch. Haechan’s dick jumping between his legs. Loves feeling you loosen under his attention.
Renjun sits to your other side, hands squeezing the sensitive fat on your inner thighs. Sharing a look with Haechan, both of them grabbing onto your knees- holding you open.
“Fuck” Renjun pants against your calve held on his shoulder. Gaze burning down between you. Haechan’s lips covered in drool watching your hole. Both of them wide eyed and attractive above you. Faces nearly angelic if not for whatever depraved thing they were preparing to do to you. The contrast between them has you instinctively clenching. Wetness seeping down your ass with a lewd sound. Both of them groaning, Renjun’s teeth sinking into your leg muffling his. Your arms lift, blocking your vision as more tears make way to your eyes. Jaemin’s loud sound of disapproval following, moving off the bed to his knees. Sat behind your head, pulling away your limbs apart. Wet eyes uncovered, pleading looking at him upside down. His smile isn’t nice, eyes sharing true intention. Shifting your head off the floor to his lap.
“Don’t cover your eyes. Good puppies pay attention.” He spits out. Vindictive malice in that tone, coated in fake sugary sweet. All of it was too much. Each of them with a hold on your body. Jaemin’s fingers loosening the knot behind your neck. Breasts falling out freely as your bathing suit top is tossed aside.
“Fuck, you’re right. She’s so fucking wet.” Haechan salivates, fingers dragging down your thigh. Fingertips brushing the skin of your mound. Jaemin’s hands covering your breasts, squeezing them together. Low throaty groan rumbling behind you.
“Look how pretty you are spread open like that puppy. Such an obedient bitch.” He mumbles, hard length digging into the back of your head. Faded memories of thick girth making your hips spasm. Haechan taking this as an invite, fingers sliding down your slit inside your entrance. Another spasm lifting your ass off the ground. Renjun’s teeth digging deeper into your calve.
“Don’t move.” He mutters against your leg. “or we’ll fuck your little hole until you beg for us to stop.”
“Already did that” Jaemins lifts a hand, smacking your cheek. “Remember puppy? Fucked you into submission like a good cock sleeve.”
Before you can even react, Haechan dips forward. Deeply inhaling your tantalizing scent.  He’s so shameless, eyes rolling up in ecstasy. Your breath hitching, chest rising and falling with need. As if you hadn’t just cum all over Renjun’s tongue. Haechan’s messy- wrinkled clothes, unkempt hair, rolled out of bed chić. No different in his sex life, fingers sloppily thrusting inside you. Walls hungrily sucking him in, urge to reach your pinnacle returning. It’s a wonder Jeno never complains about how insatiable you are. Begging to get fucked at any opportunity.
His eyes turn up to you, half lidded. Lips pouting out, uttering words before wrapping around your clit.— “Such a pretty pussy. Everything about you pretty.”
Your neck releases, eyes squeezing shut in a scream. Fingers speeding up, wetness spattering out around his hand. Tongue rolling around your little erected bud, breathlessly panting. Haechan appearing deranged sucking on your clit. Visible tongue wiggling rapidly, darting back and forth like a pro. Busting out tricks, waving it around. Lips kissing your swelling clit with a grin. An absolute menace. 
Renjuns nails sink into your thigh, hips jerking up against you. Rubbing his tented shorts against your leg held up. The stretch becoming uncomfortable, too lost in the overwhelming pleasure to realize how sore you already feel. Only able to reason feeling like a fuck toy. Willing to be used and degraded any way they wish for. All you can do is mewl, weak attempts to ride Haechan’s fingers failing. Renjun shoving you down with a hand on your stomach. Snapping at you to stop moving. 
“Can’t fucking take this..” Jaemin blurts behind you to himself. Thick heavy cock landing near your cheek. Eyes widening, glancing up. Jaemin winking, hand cupping your jaw. Other hand slapping his massive length against your cheek. “Make that mouth useful for something other than crying.”
Fingers sink into your cheek, turning you to the side. Jaemin’s fat cockhead hitting your tongue, precum oozing out. Renjun’s mouth finding your nipples, pressing your thigh up against your chest. He sucks aggressively, buds swelling up under the roof of his mouth. Haechan shoving your thigh further open, adjusting himself right between your widened thighs. Slurping sounds from his mouth, from your mouth attempting to get an inch past Jaemin’s cock head. Lips cracking in a familiar way, your mind yelling at you to do better. You did it before, you could do it again.
“Come all over my face.” Haechan commands, slapping the back of your thigh. Tongue squeezing inside of you past his fingers. Renjun locking eyes with you, dragging two fingers between his lips. Shining with spit as sun light hits them, pressing on your hardened nipple. Muffled screams trying to escape your lips straining around Jaemin’s size. Haechan’s tongue incessantly prodding at your filled hole. Fingers spreading further open until you give, letting him slip inside. 
“Shit man” Jaemin grunts, hands dragging through his hair. Slowly over his face to his chest. Pulling out his cock with loud wet slaps on your cheek. His member so heavy, your face tightening up with every drop. Slapping his cock down harder from your reaction, teeth gritting concealing a smile. “What a good little slut you are.”
Your head spins, Jaemin turning blurry. A few tears slipping from the corners of your eyes. Only the first of many to come. Your hips bucking upward, hole tightening up around Haechan’s fingers and tongue. Hands wrapping around Jaemin’s biceps above you. Muscles meaty and flexed under your grip. All of it driving your sense crazy. Face turning to the side, mouth parting open over Jaemin’s cock releasing a broken shouted sob.
“Haechan! OH FUCK! HAECHAN OH FUCK!” Your cries get louder as you cum again, screams warning out. Haechan not budging, tongue catching all of your wetness. Gazing up annoyed you didn’t squirt for him. Dragging his forehead, nose, lips and chin up and down your slit. Licking over every inch of your mound. Ass landing back down on the floor tired. Cumming twice in a row using up too much of your strength. Chest heaving letting out trembled whimpers against Jaemin’s cock. Tongue and lips dragging over the size lazily. Words between Jaemin and Renjun incoherent, still reeling from your orgasm. Hissing when Haechan places a kiss on your swollen clit.
“Let me fuck her first. I’m about to busts a middle school in my fucking shorts here dude.” Renjun pleads. Haechan sitting up in attention, hair sticking up all kinds of directions. Shining slick enhancing his soft features, making him even more beautiful if possible.
“When aren’t you.” Haechan grumbles, taking in your wrecked appearance. Dick twitching in his shorts satisfied he did that to you. Sucking your juices off his finger with a wink when your eyes meet. “but fine, if you must.”
“Get back on your knees” Renjuns fingers snap. Walking on his own knees over between your legs. You make no sign of movement, stomach slowly lifting with every drawn out breath. Haechan’s smirk intensifies, nodding to Jaemin.
“Let’s help our cute puppy. She doesn’t know how to properly stand on all fours yet.” Haechan pulls you up with Jaemin’s assistance. Manhandling you onto your front, ass on display for them once again. Renjun sighs, chewing his plump bottom lip.
“Fuck it” hands grip your hips, lifting your lower half up. Well taken care of hands, free of any callous, squeeze your ass. You whine out, Jaemin and Haechan sitting on their knees before you. Haechan joining Jaemin with his hard dick out, hand painfully gripped around the base. Jaemin stroking his length up and down lethargically. Faces showing you how eager they both are to get inside of you. You fall to your elbows in surprise, yelping out landing hard. Renjun’s tongue jabbing at your rim, pulling back with a noisy spit. 
Renjun grunts around your clenching asshole, tongue excitedly prodding forward. Groaning vibrations up your spine after every sad mewl you cry out. Haechan lifts your tear stained face, making you watch him and Jaemin. Both of them not really jerking off, just buying their time. 
“Come on man, you said fuck her. Not eat her ass like it’s your last meal on death row.” Jaemin rolls his eyes. Wasn’t he the one that told them to get your ass ready? Quickly forgetting, wanting to hear you scream when he fucks your dirty hole.
“Shutup. Been thinking about this for so long..” Renjun sighs, kissing your tight wrinkled hole. “Pretty ass like this deserves to be worshipped.”
Letting out louder whines, struggling to keep your eyes open. Haechan thumbs tears away from your cheek, continuously spilling out. Trying his best to not think about how much you’re enjoying getting your ass ate out in front of them. 
“Such a slut” he whispers to himself. Muscles in his arm straining, fisting the base of his cock. Your mouths hung open pliant, gasping in desperation. Renjun lapping at your hole letting out drawled out moans. Hands kneading your ass till you relax, tongue circling your rim. Moving in when you finally unclench. Lips latching around your rim, tongue wiggling it’s way in. Fucking spit right into your hole. Thumbs parting you open further, dribbling spit between your cheeks.
“Tastes so good. Tastes too good.” Renjun murmurs, hand landing on your ass with a slap. Tugging his cock, swiping up and down your slit gathering wetness over the tip. Cock teasing at your entrance, Haechan lifting your chin up further.
“Beg for it.” He instructs, hand sliding down to your neck. Back arching forward tense, Renjun inching closer.
“Fuck me. Please just fuck me already.” Renjun grinds in all the way following your words. Cock filling you up so nicely. Jaemin biting his lip watching your eyes roll back. Renjun wastes no time, pulling your hips back. Thrusting smoothly in with low grunts.
“Keep her mouth open.” Jaemin tells Haechan, moving in. Cock prodding at your lips. “Come on, widen that mouth. You can do it, I know you can.”
Your lips messily roll over the tip of his length, body jerking up with every slide of Renjun’s cock. Haechan’s fingers dig into your cheeks, assisting your mouth in opening up for Jaemin’s size. Moaning around his length as your lips manage to part enough to swallow half of him. Both penetrating you from opposite ends in different ways. Renjun focused, working hard to make sure you both get off. Jaemin careless, happiness expanding watching you struggle to handle his thick cock. Lips blistering dryly sucking down more inches.
Renjun’s hands dig into your waist, rubbing your lower back. Thumbs digging in where you’d normally ache. Moans trapped behind your tongue lapping at the girth choking you. Haechan letting go of your chin, hand stroking loose hair out of your face. Other still controlling his cock from bursting. The visuals turning him on a little too much. Muttering something under his breath that sounds like ‘hate you and your monster dick’ to distract himself. The tenderness Haechan and Renjun give you so opposite of what you’re accustomed to. Stirring up heat in your lower belly. Renjun’s lips dragging over your spine, tongue hanging out. Leaving trails of spit marked on your skin. Grinding deeply between your walls.
Haechan takes note of your reddening eyes, pulling you free from the ‘choking device’ between Jaemin’s legs. Quivering with copious amounts of drool spilling from your lips. Breathing in and out harshly, sending Haechan thankful eyes. Not even a second before Renjun takes advantage, quickening thrusts. Pushing your upper back down, shoulders pressing to the floor. Fucking into you manically, pretty moans spewing from his lips. Some of the prettiest moans you’ve been lucky enough to listen to, right into your ear. Whiny breaths, skin smacking together, your cries echoing into the floor.
“I’m cumming!” you scream so loud. Jaemin and Haechan sharing a concerned look, hoping no one could hear you outside with music blasting. Renjun’s deeper scream follows yours. Rumbling behind his throat, less anguished than yours. Licking across the sweat pooling on his top lip. Falling back on his knees, wet length slipping out. Cum already spilling from the tip, most of it landing on the backs of your thighs and ass. His eyes widening, shocked with how much cum won’t stop shooting out. Stomach sucking in with a tired howl.
“Fuck me man.” He bends forward, burning forehead resting on the cool floor. “Holy shit.”
“What’d I tell you..” Haechan’s tired of waiting. Only let Renjun fuck you first since he helped lure you in here- sort of. It was his plan after all. Easily tossing you on the bed, hand slapping your stinging marked up ass. Subtly missing where Renjun’s cum drips.
“My turn.” He closes in on you. Jaemin’s arm blocking his movement.
“Our turn.” With a shove to Haechan’s chest, Jaemin crawls onto the bed. Hands finding your ruined ass yet again, parting you open. Wet rim beaming at him so invitingly. Haechan stares too, huffing out a sigh. Maybe another day.
“Come here pretty. I’m gonna make you feel so good.” Haechan cups under your arms, biceps protruding when lifting you. Moving you to the head board with some of your help. Crawling over to him on your knees. Cunt squelching between your bodies. It’s not as if you went for him first out of Jeno’s group of friends for no reason. Mostly because he was easy, and easy on the eyes. Body responding for you as Haechan digs fingers into your hips. Dragging your parting lips up and down his raging hard cock. Fearful he’ll be busting a nut before even getting inside of you.
Jaemin straddles behind your back, chin resting on your shoulder. Hand squeezing your jaw to make you look at him. Fingers skimming up and down your wet crack.  “Guess you do back door now puppy.”
You stiffen up, staring into Jaemin’s evil eyes. Hole kissing his fingertips with every pass. Grin on his face growing larger. Haechan’s hips lifting up, humping against your soaked core. Stomach and pelvic bone gleaming with your wetness.
“Gonna squirt for me?” His brow raises in question. Folds parting around his length, cock head dragging across your entrance. Pussy pulsing with need. Mind losing track of how many times you’ve cum by now, ready for more. Jaemin let’s go of your jaw, sucking on three fingers. Getting them nice and wet. Spitting into his other hand, palming his cock with tired breaths. Tired of not being deep in your ass already.
“Pussy already feels so fucking good.” Haechan’s brows wiggles, length circling your entrance. Hole parting open around his head, lifting you off trying to tease. Dying to fuck you and have you shaking in crazed heat above him. With one last prod, his hips twist up. Cock squeezing between your walls. Simultaneously releasing gasps of relief, your hips swiveling around. Gripping around his delicious length. Core contracting around the ridges of cock grinding deep inside you.
Jaemin’s fingers make their way inside your ass with no warning. Back arching forward, pussy grinding down harder on Haechan. Hurried thrusting wet fingers forcing you to ride him. Hips pulling away shoving you down on Haechan’s size faster. His strangled moans growing louder with every push and pull. Jaemin spitting at his dick one more time.
“Slutty puppies don’t need this much prep” his voice draws fear down your spine. Wet tip of his cock poking at your asshole. He bites your earlobe, sharp tone hissing— “Don’t forget I need to cum too.”
Jaemin holds your ass open, cock spearing in pushing past the tight ring. Teeth gritting, screaming curses from the instant tightness. Abs clenching, arms wrapping around your neck in a choking hold. Hips slamming up again, cock burying all the way in your ass. “FUCK! Fuck! So fucking tight.”
He inhales deeply, struggling breaths panting into your hair. Moans strained, cock twitching between you. Your body losing life, only held up by Jaemin’s arms. Haechan crying out, hips lifting off the bed. Building a rhythm, fucking up into you harder with each thrust.
You think you let out a scream, throat burning in the aftermath to remind you. Tongue hanging out gasping for air loudly. Jaemin pulling out to the tip before pounding into you. The stretch from both ends too much. Cocks gliding against each other between your lower half. Both moving at a different pace. Haechan moving faster from Jaemin’s rigorous fucking.
“Fuck! I’m not gonna last!” Haechan screams, such a noisy boy. Hand slipping from your hip, thumb circling your clit rapidly. He growls through gritted teeth, thrusting turning jerky. “Come on, come on!”
Weakly shouting, tears and spit drenching your face. Brutal pace they’ve both fallen into filling the room with the sounds of too much skin stickily smacking. Haechan presses your clit the right way. Jaemin stilling in your ass groaning as you clench up. Hips pulling away from both of their lengths. Haechan popping out lewdly as squirt flies out of your core. Landing across his stomach, chest, shooting high enough for his tongue to catch. Head lifting with his mouth open, slurping up everything you give him. Jaemin returning to fucking your ass not even a second after the last spurt of liquid spills. Folds forming around Haechan’s sensitive cock again, earning another shout from him. Head shaking as cum releases over his stomach. Knocking the wind out of him successfully. Eyes rolling back until all that’s left are whites staring back at you. Heavy gasping breath’s from all your chests so loud.
Too loud to even hear the door opening. Jaemin’s hips pounding against you too loud to even hear the all too familiar pissed off growl.
“Gonna cum in your ass.” Jaemin’s not quiet. Loud enough for anyone in the room to hear.
“Don’t dare fucking cum in her ass.” Jeno’s voice barrels throughout the room. As if every other sound turns muted suddenly. Jaemin’s hips halting to a stop, grunting into your hair. Jeno staring you both down. Boiling up enough you swear smokes clouding out of his ears.
“That’s not up to you.” Jaemin hisses, thrusting in as deep as he can go. “Want me to cum in your ass puppy?”
Without hesitation, your head shakes. Watering eyes stuck on Jeno. “No!”
Jaemin curses, questioning why he even asked. Pounding you down with force against Haechan’s lifeless body. Renjun trying to play dead on the floor like he didn’t just fuck you before them.
“Stupid puppy. Bad puppy.” Jaemin rumbles against your back. Ass brutally stretching around his length with every rapid thrust. Using all of his thigh muscle to fuck into you, headboard rattling against the wall. Your eyes on Jeno, moving only a centimeter inside the room. Lips pulled back revealing teeth. Hand reaching out for him over the sheets- like once before. Groveling like a broken useless toy, begging to be fixed.
“Pull out.” Jeno grits. Jaemin’s neck snapping, caught up in how good you feel suctioned around him.
“Fuck off.” His thrusts don’t falter, not even a bit. Cock mercilessly pounding away at your ass. Full balls slapping against you loudly.
“Not even fucking her properly. None of you know how to fuck her. Only me..” Jeno stands by the bed. Crouching down eye level to you. Your cheek pressed up on Haechan’s panting chest. “Isn’t that right baby?”
Your head nods rapidly, Jaemin’s hand pressing you further against Haechan. Eyes rolling annoyed.
“God shutup” his face squeezes, mouth pursing tightly. Taking out his frustration on your ass. Sick of how Jeno has to interrupt when he’s fucking you. Couldn’t have been when Renjun was slamming into your pussy, could it.
Jeno’s eyes trail down your arm, to where your fingers lay out stretched. Reaching for him, mentally telling you off. Hates how Haechan was right, jealousy doing things to get his dick hard like nothing else. Loves knowing you’ll degrade yourself this much just so he’ll fuck your brain empty. Might as well act like your boyfriend. Nothing about what you two had going on was normal anyway.
Jaemin pulls out, hand jerking violently at his length. Smacking your bruising cheeks in anger, silently wishing he could slap Jeno in the face too. Chest heaving in a deep growl, trembling out you shooting out hot cum on your lower back. Smearing his cock between your ass, letting white strings spill on your asshole.
“Fuck. Fuck.” He falls over to the side, landing all to close to Haechan’s cum soaked chest. Turning with a disgusted sneer, as if all of you weren’t covered in each other’s bodily fluids.
Jeno’s hand finds your scalp, hair wrapped in his clutches. Yanking you off the exhausted man under you. Yelping out, dragging off to the corner of the bed. Jeno looking at you like you’re the filthiest girl he’s ever seen, maybe you are.
“Did my baby get fucked good?” Your head shakes in his hold. Even if it’s a lie, you know better than to answer him any other way. He roughly throws you back on the sheets, shorts dropping to his feet in seconds. Mounting you with speed, legs tossed over his shoulders bending you in half.
“That’s cause no one fucks you like me.” That’s all it takes before Jeno sinks inside of your abused hole with one swift motion. He just knows how to use you. Face contorting over you. You completely unaware he hasn’t fucked anyone since the last time he had you weeks ago. Savoring your tight cunt wrapping around him so deliciously. Like a welcome home after a long trip.
“Jeno.. please.. please f-fuck me..” you’re too sore after Renjun and Haechan having their way with you. Never willing to deny Jeno any of your holes. You belong to him, anything he wants is his. Jeno’s dark eyelashes flutter over his cheeks, head nodding.
“A minute..” hips swivel forward, cock circling your insides. Jeno always fucks deep, stomach protruding out with his size. He takes deep breaths, already looking like he just fucked you for hours. Sack tightening up between his legs screaming to let him cum.
“Feels so good Jeno. Love your cock so much. Love it more than anything.” You let out a helpless moan, arms wrapping around Jeno’s neck. Pulling him in closer. Knees around your head, grateful for flexibility. Jeno’s sweat covered forehead rubbing against yours.
“God baby..” Jeno growls, hips lifting back. Cock gliding out of you to the tip so slowly. Plunging back in fiercely, hips snapping into action. Fucking you into the mattress with all of his weight. He growls against your cheek, nose scrunching up— “no.. you, fuck, you feel so fucking good.”
Jeno slams forward repeatedly. The room feels like it’s rocking all around you. Breathless cries reaching the back of your throat. Only managing airy breaths, inhaling whenever you can. Vocals torn up from screaming for what felt like forever. Jeno shifts up, cock hitting that spot deep inside you. The way he always did.
“Jeno!” Your raspy cry forces his eyes open. Lips panting on yours, tongue licking where your cupids bow dips.
“Cum for me baby. My baby.” Fuck that’s all it takes. Jeno’s cock reaching deep inside of you so good at this different angle. Searing heat painting your insides. Body cramping up, cunt gripping around Jeno tightly. A little pain mixing in with over stimulated pleasure, but that’s how you liked it anyway. Jeno thrusts through your climax, groaning in your parted lips. Hips stuttering forward, seed spilling inside of you. Heavy breaths entering your dry mouth as Jeno twitches, emptying his balls.
Sitting up, letting your sore legs land at his sides. Jeno glides out with a hiss, cock lewdly popping wet out of your irritated convulsing hole. His cum spilling from your walls down to your ass, mixing with yours. Cock head dragging up and down rubbing the mess around.
“Mine. All of you. Only mine. Always mine.”
——————————————————————————
When you come to, it’s only because of weight sinking the mattress around your frame.
“Jeno?” Your bleary eyes squint. Back of your hand rubbing them open, trying to focus.
“Shh..” strong arms scoop you up from the bed. Three masculine figures left behind, foot steps leading you out of the room. Too drowsy to keep your eyes open. Broad shoulders loom above you, soft cushion meeting your back as he sets you down. What feels like hours later, truly only less than a minute. Your tongue sticks to the roof of your mouth, lapping dryly. A large hand stroking your hair back. What feels like a warm damp towel gently cleaning your body. Dry sticky cum diminishing with each pass of warmth. Hissing when he reaches between your thighs, hearing a faint apology after.
Warmth engulfs your body, wrapped in a soft heavenly comforter. The larger sturdy figure joining you. Fingers massaging your scalp, worried the hair pulling that took place may have been too much. Also maybe everything else that took place.
“You okay baby?” Jeno’s voice meets your ears. Eyes fluttering open, grimacing shut resisting the urge to pass out again.
“Jeno?” A cough follows your curiosity. Throat scratchy and parched from all your screams of pleasure. Lips peck around your cheeks and forehead, silently “mhm”ing against your skin. You finally manage to keep your eyes open. Admiring Jeno’s defined features, tempted to lean up and bite his nose.
“Am I.. still.. your baby?” Your words crack. Dry tongue and mouth making it impossible to speak up. Jeno lifts a water bottle to your lips. Smile slowly spreading over his face. Eyes bunching up lovingly, like a dream.
With a kiss on the tip of your nose, Jeno wraps around you. Fingers tickling up and down your spine. “Always my baby. Only my baby.”
———————————————————————-
Mark calls out “hello?” Returning from a long trip to three different stores in search of Jeno’s favorite alcoholic beverage. Alleged favorite, not actually his favorite at all. Setting down a box of sparkling water alcohol in the kitchen. He pauses for a moment, before heading outside to the backyard. “I gotta pee.”
With a quick stride around he ends up in the main hallway. Doors lined up on both sides leading to different rooms. The first one he opens someone’s bedroom- neat and organized. The next one a lot messier- bed unmade and clothes tossed all over the floor.
“Where the hell’s the bathr—…oh.. what the fuck!” Marks face displays shock. Three of his friends naked bodies wrapped around each other on the bed before him.
Renjun sits up, eyes half shut looking around the room. Still unsure when he ended up on the bed himself. Eyes searching for Mark’s voice. Landing where he stands near the door. Digging the heel of his palm into his eyes with a yawn.
Mark steps forward, staring at Haechan and Jaemin’s sleeping figures. Light snores sounding out, the two guys exhausted. Haechan’s nose digging into the back of Jaemin’s neck, drool spilling down his chin landing on his back. Sure enough fighting when they come to- “Why were you cuddling on me like that!”— “Don’t act like that wasn’t the best nap of your life.”
“Deng, had no idea you guys were into this!” Mark smiles at Renjun, still groaning half awake. “Remind’s me of college, invite me next time!”
———————————————————————-
🐶: “Goodmorning my anal princess<3”
🐶: “angel**”
😇: “Jeno what the fuck. I’m trying to sleep.”
🐶: “Nooo, come to the kitchen baby. Dad got called in to work for a meeting. We’re home alone🤤”
😇: “I’m sleepy.”
🐶: “I’m making you breakfast🥺”
😇: “Be down in a minute.”
You giggle washing dishes after eating Jeno’s pancakes. With some help from an instant mix powder and water, he didn’t do half bad. A little oddly shaped and crispy but it was the thought that counts. Also helped how he cut small pieces and fed you. Pecking your lips with syrupy kisses after each bite. It was disgusting, in the most non-disgusting way possible. 
Felt too good to be true having Jeno all over you since returning home. Even risking injury scaling the roof to crawl into your window whenever your parents stayed up too late. Jeno figuring out different ways to spend extra time with you. Even if it meant running through sprinklers at 6am with his dick flapping around when your mom tried busting into your room. Becoming more cunning to her ways, specific days she’d choose to drag you to the AM aerobics class with her. 
The chair you’d started placing under the handle sparing a few extra minutes for Jeno to make his escape, bare assed and all. He went as far as hanging out with Mark, alone. Explaining the situation to him. Maybe throwing in a lie here or there. Something about how you’d been dating before your parents met. Thankfully he was pretty understanding, explaining he was more interested in getting laid than a serious commitment. Further peeving your ass for having to pretend to care about his rants on Bruno Mars being the greatest musical artists of these times. Either way, Jeno was proving himself worthy of being your boyfriend, in secret of course. Still risking his chances at holding your hand in public.
“Jeno! How am I going to get anything done with you all over me!” With another exasperated laugh, you shove your ass back. Jeno’s crotch pressing between your cheeks. Stealing nips and kisses along your jaw. 
“You’re not. Stop doing the dishes, I’ll wash them later. You have more important tasks to worry about.” He grinds forward. Hardened bulge letting you know exactly what he means. “We’re home alone, no excuse to not bend you over this counter and fuck you till you’re screaming loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear.” 
Jeno squeezes your ass over your pajama bottoms. Husky voice whispering into your ear— “and I’m still hungry.”
That familiar shuddering vibration rolls down your spine. Jeno loosening the draw string holding up your bottoms, letting them fall to your feet. Finger tips delicately skimming between your cheeks. “Perfect baby, always ready for me.” 
Jeno dips down to his knees, just like a good boy whose earned his treats. Looking over your shoulder down to where Jeno’s thighs flex, boxers sliding up exposing more smooth skin. It was just so unfair how attractive he looked. Whether he was hate fucking you into delirium, or on his knees staring up at you with shining sweet puppy eyes. He was made to drive you crazy either way. Eliciting heat between your thighs like no one else could. 
Lips part on your ass, tracing soft pecks and wet kisses over the skin. Finally healed up after his friends destroyed your ass. Jeno having to wait two weeks before you’d even let him steal a squeeze. Always complaining about that Jaemin and how you’d never go near his huge cock again. Jeno interjecting that you’d never go near anyone else’s dick other than his again. Especially not his friends.
Jeno pulls you open, gently kissing your rim. That also on a time out for the time being. Loving sweet anal princess text messages or not. His tongue can’t resist a taste, sweeping up and down, nose spending extra time sucking in deep breaths. 
“You’re so gross.” You whine, bending forward onto the kitchen counter. Ass perking out nicely for easier access. 
“Only gross for you.” Jeno places another wet loud peck on your rim. Shoving your thighs further apart. Holding yourself up on your tippy toes and his nose drags down your slit. Arousal evident on his face, wetness gleaming off his chin under the fluorescent kitchen lights. Lips crashing on your core, slurping up any wetness thats dripped out. Tongue swiping up and down between your folds, only barely nudging your clit. Eating you out from behind with no concern for his throbbing length. Moaning his tongues way inside your hole. Wet walls wrapping around him so good.
Jeno’s hot hands squeeze your thighs. Fingers tickling the backs of your knees. Face burying deeper, nose ending up back against your ass. Tongue working inside you with stiff wiggles. Pulling away with a loud suck on your mound. Dipping lower, nosing your fluttering entrance. Lips sucking your sensitive clit, rolling it around the tip of his tongue. Toes cramping up as your legs shake. More wetness making way out of you, sliding down Jeno’s cheek. He loves it, wants to be drenched in you all day.
Jeno stands back up, teeth nipping your bare shoulder. Pajama tank straps sliding half way down your arm. His face glowing coated in you. Jeno more than happy to walk around like that. Leaning in, wet nose digging into your cheek with pouted lips. Becoming needier for your kisses with each day. Most nights didn’t even end up in fucking. Jeno falling asleep with his ear pressed against your chest, opting to not risk making too much noise. Your parents comments about how close you’d two become growing more repetitive.
“Love fucking you..” Jeno mumbles on your lips. Sharing messy kisses with each other. Cock sliding between your thighs, folds parting open on his size. Gliding back and forth letting your wet slick coat him. 
“Love when you fuck me.” Jeno’s smile appears with your comment. Eyes disappearing cutely, bringing out that cute beauty mark you had to kiss every morning.
His forehead rolls against yours. Body leaned over on you. Hips lifting, cock making way inside you with an easy slide. Biting his bottom lip focused on your face. Your lips parting open, still surprised whenever Jeno fucks you. He never fails, always feels good. Get’s you going. Soft, messy, hard, hot, he deserved claim.
Jeno grinds into you slowly, letting you really feel the shape of his cock. Ridges gliding against your walls, fat veins pulsating in you. Hands squeezing your waist, fingers prodding your ribcage. Trying to hold back, trying to savor it. Taking his time since he can. You know better though, hand stroking his hair. Stopping at his nape.
“Please baby. Need it. Need to get fucked hard.” 
Jeno lets out a rasped growl, pulling out to the tip. Slamming forward without resistance. Bodies blending into each other as his pace speeds up. His strong hold keeping you in place. Cock drilling into you carelessly. All you had to do was beg, just once. His tongue lapping all over you. Face covered in saliva, fasts thrusts even making some in your eye. Moaning when Jeno finds the angle, thrusting eagerly deep into you. Focusing on hitting the same spot over and over the tighter you clench up. Moans mixing in with each others panted breaths. Jeno’s deep chest growls growing louder the more you squeeze around his length.
“Jeno! Jeno!!” You shout, panicking eyes watching the garage door. Sound of the metal loudly closing, light foot steps following. “Someones home! Pull out! Oh my God pull out!” 
“I’m so fuc-fucking close…” Jeno groans, hips endlessly pistoning you into the counter. Screaming out in a throaty raspy tone, uttering garbled words— “I’m cumm— oh fuck baby, I love-!..”
The garage door rickshas open, bouncing off the wall. Briefcase landing on the floor with a loud bang. Jeno deeply growling above the noise, hips stuttering in climax. Hot cum bursting out through your insides. Cock deliciously jerking with every spurt of release. Neck rolling back, releasing broken whimpers slapping your ass.
His dad stands at the door, jaw hung to the floor- “WHAT THE FUCK!”
a/n: THE END🌶(this crazy shit is not proofread- later lol)
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taglist: (idk who wanted to be tagged anymore srry)
@seuomo​ @unknown5tar​ @sunoosi​  @ahsshilee-me​ @jaeminne​ @rapha7 @tulipatethic
2K notes · View notes
angelicmark · a year ago
Text
eventual (m)
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pairing: best friend!jeno x reader
genre: fluff, smut, angst? (not much, i wanted to give you guys a break lmao)
warnings: unprotected sex, fingering, dirty talk, riding, pretty tame but lots of romance
wc: 7.7k
summary: falling in love with your best friend, lee jeno.
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you can feel your head growing heavy, and you gulp down as much water as you can. spring started to blossom only just a few weeks ago, and you were already feeling the heat starting to take a toll on you. you huff out a breath of air, feeling bitter towards the weather that seemed to hate you. this catches the attention of the boy next to you.
“you okay?” he asks, but it was so brief you barely even heard it.
you shrug, “i mean, i guess. the heat is fucking with me.”
he laughs, the sound echoing into the spring air, “you’re so over dramatic, it’s not even that hot outside yet.”
you pout at him, “you’re so mean to me, jeno.”
he raises an eyebrow at you, challenging your statement. you grin from ear to ear, knowing damn well he treats you better than anyone you’ve ever met before. jeno was the ideal best friend. anyone would be lucky to have him, and you were lucky you got your paws on him before anyone else. you smile to yourself with victory, and he looks at you with confusion, as if asking why the hell you look like your ego is about to burst.
you point at him, “you’re mine, lee jeno.” you grin with the most confident smile you can muster. and he rolls his eyes.
“whatever,” but he’s smiling. and you can see the soft blush that graces his cheeks. you poke his cheek and he immediately swats you away with a look of disgust.
“you love me,” you lean your body against his, your arms linking with his own arm. you start to rub your face against his shoulder like some crazy affectionate cat and he snorts, trying to shove you away with a small squeak when you bite him; soft but causing alarm.
“what the hell?!” he looks at you with wide eyes and you laugh at the surprise.
“love me, jeno.”
and he does. you don’t know, but he does. and the way your eyes sparkle in the bright light of the sun, makes his heart start to pick up pace again. and he feels his body start to sweat as he blushes again. but he stops struggling against your hold on him, and let’s you lean into him like you need him. and he wants to desperately believe you did need him. so he succumbed himself into your hold, and even brought you closer to him by wrapping the arm you were squeezing around your body. and you both fall into a sweet silence, and he falls deeper into the scent you carry. and it’s perfect like that. just the two of you. no interruptions.
that was the first time jeno realized he was falling in love with you.
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you yawn, stretching your limbs as you check the time. it was noon, you managed to sleep in a little later than usual. you look around your room, wondering where jeno could have gone. you pout, feeling an emptiness as you reach the kitchen. but the hole is quickly filled with love when you catch him cursing as he eagerly tries to cook ‘breakfast’. his hair was messy, signalling that he probably just woke up, too. and it was such an unreal sight to see him this way. jeno always managed to put some kind of effort into his appearance everywhere he went, even when he was with you. so being able to see him with messy hair, a crumbled t-shirt, and grey sweatpants.. well, it was a blessing to say the least.
you gnaw at your bottom lip, smiling to yourself, “we both know you can’t cook, idiot.” your arms quickly wrap around him, scaring him half to death as he jumps up with a yelp, almost dropping the egg he held. you tighten your hold on him when he tries to struggle away, resting your head against his back.
he sighs, giving up and placing the egg back in the carton, “i wanted to surprise you.” you can hear the pout, and your heart stings at the gesture. he drops his hands to place them on your arms, rubbing soothing circles with his thumbs.
you hum, smiling wider and closing your eyes, the scent of him invading your senses, “you did already.”
“yeah?” he questions, “how’s that?”
you pinch his side and he squeaks, “by not being next to me when i woke up.” you fake pout as you step away from him. he quickly turns around and grabs at your hands, pulling you back into his embrace. your face starts to feel hot at the unexpected movement. you were almost awkwardly pressed into him, but you made it more comfortable in the end, easing into his hold.
“sorry,” he hums back, resting his head on top of yours, “i won’t do it again.”
and your heart thrums against your chest. and you’re almost certain he can feel it, hear it even. but neither of you say anything more, the silence consuming the room and one another tugging softly on the other’s body. it was drowning. you were drowning in a world that revolved around jeno. and, right in that second, you didn’t care. you didn’t seem to mind that your head was flooded with the way his cat eyes looked at you with a certain sparkle. or how his voice made the ends of your hair stand up. he was everything and more of what you wanted. how could you resist the urge to think about him when he was this close?
you rub his back, your nails lightly digging into his skin and making him hum with satisfaction. you knew what he liked for the most part, and you knew he had a thing for when you ran your nails across him. you licked your lips, stuffing your face closer into his hold and he accepts it with a smile. you felt like you were holding the world in your hands and, in a way, you were. jeno was your world. he squeezed his way into your world and made it whole again, just the same way you did with him. you and jeno weren’t always like this. the way the two of you slowly became friends was so stereotypical, the two of you meeting as kids and clicking instantly. you grew up together. created an irresistible bond. and there were times where the two of you fought, arguing and sometimes bringing one another to tears. but, in the end, you always made sure to go back to one another. and it was nice never having to worry about losing each other, because he loved you and you certainly loved him. it was an unspoken truth.
“hey,” jeno starts, his voice soft.
you nod your head, “hm?”
“the stove is burning.”
“why the fuck are you so calm?!” you shove him away, smoke starting to consume the kitchen. and he laughs, watching as the two of you struggle to clear the air before the smoke alarm goes off.
that was the second time jeno realized he was falling in love with you.
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you felt almost frozen in your spot. you could feel your body slowly growing heavier and heavier. you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, chewing on your bottom lip. jeno’s eyes glaze over you with suspicion, raising an eyebrow at your odd behavior. you were normally the excited, overly hyper one. jeno was the cool-headed one who would just laugh at your excitement. but as your face became drained of emotion, it felt like he was being poured in ice cold water.
“i feel..” you avoid eye contact with him for as long as you could. it was impossible having to look at him so much, your heart would end up cursing you for staring so long. “..i feel insane.”
jeno snorts at that, “why?”
“you make my heart race.” and it shouldn’t have sent him into a frenzy the way it did, but...it did. and his palms were starting to sweat under the sun that was trying to cover just how cold the weather had gotten over time. fall was running in faster than you imagined, and as you clutched your warm drink close to yourself with nimble fingers, he couldn’t stop the smile that stretched past his lips. were you really that nervous?
“don’t be stupid,” his voice was amused and you looked at him with slightly annoyed eyes, “we both know the story of best friends falling in love with each other. how could we be any different?”
you smiled at that, a chuckle bubbling in your throat, “i guess you’re right.”
jeno looks at you with a small smile, his heart starting to pick up in speed. he understood what you meant, truly. because you made his heart race all the same as he made yours race. you looked truly so beautiful under the threatening sun, the cold even preventing you from sweating so it made you look even more like an angel. he laughs a bit at the thought of you shortly complaining about the heat previously before fall came around. you made the world easier, the sun shine brighter. you were his sunshine, and he hoped he was yours as well. you guided him out of the dark when no one else would, when no one else could. you slapped him right back into reality, even with your bubbly personality. and it was a true blessing.
you were a dream.
“i’m always right,” jeno sticks his chin up, and you lightly knock him against his side and he laughs at that, giving you a fake surprised look.
you playfully roll your eyes, staring at him a little longer than usual, “you’re an idiot.”
he gasps, “and you’re mean!” he pouts, looking away from you and towards the pond in front of you.
you continue looking at him, a smile gracing your features. why was he even more beautiful right now? you felt like you were coming right out of some romance novel written just for the two of you. it made your heart skip a beat. you could be with him forever, and you wouldn’t mind. he has made you realize that love is such a pure thing to have.
you brush a strand of his hair out of his face, and he jumps a bit, looking at you with confused eyes. you giggle, “i want to see your face.”
he relaxes into your touch, letting you do as pleased as he stares into your soul, “okay..” he let’s out a breath of air, and you see the way his lips twitch into a small smile. and the world stands still between the two of you. his eyes on you, and yours on his. the magnetic pull was turning serious the longer the two of you stared. and you couldn’t deny the way you felt for him anymore. neither could he.
the minute your lips meet his, the whole entire universe fades away. nothing else mattered than this very moment. the both of you waited months, maybe even years, for this very moment. and it was nothing less than heaven to have him so close, kissing him with all you have left. you sigh into his grip as he raises a hand to stroke your cheek with his thumb. and you smile at the tender gesture, and he seems to smile right back. his lips fit perfectly against your own. how could that be? you were blessed enough to get to kiss him like this. to get to hold him so close. nothing about this very moment felt wrong, or rushed, or too much. it was perfect.
you could feel yourself falling a little deeper when he lightly licks at your bottom lip, asking for access, to which you grant him. you adjust yourself closer, still tightly clutching onto the drink you held. the crispy air was cold on your skin, but he warmed you up. you wrap your arms around his neck, and he leans down to you, kissing you slowly but with fervor. you were drowning in him, everything that he was. everything that he is. the hand that wasn’t holding onto your cup traveled up into his hair, softly tugging and he let’s out a soft noise of approval.
jeno was a dream.
and you were his angel.
that was the third time jeno realized he was falling in love with you.
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“i despise exams,” you huff, and jeno laughs at your despair. you glare at him, shooting him a lot that made him lose his grin a bit. he did feel bad for you, truly. but your pouty voice and lips were just too much for him. you were too cute.
“i’m sorry, baby,” he kisses your cheek, making you hum a bit. “take a break.”
you pout again, sighing as your shoulders drop, “i can’t. i have a lot to cover.”
jeno rolls his eyes a bit, turning your chair around, “for me?” his eyes were glossy, shining under the dim lamp. your heart clenched in your chest the longer you stared at him. he smiles a bit when he notices you cracking.
“...jeno-”
he leans down to kiss you, quietting you to ease your nerves. and it works. you let him kiss you deeper into his embrace, accepting him wholly. and he’s grateful that you’re not fighting him. his hands are quick to grasp you in his hold, easing you out of the chair as you let out a soft gasp against his lips when you part away from him in surprise. he chuckles a bit, dragging you away from the horrible pile of books and papers, settling you very softly onto the bed. and you smile at just how tender jeno truly is. he hovers over you, and he’s about to kiss you, but stops right before and smiles at you.
“i love you.”
and it’s the first time hearing it. you can feel your heart beating in your chest wildly. but you have no uncertainty left in your body. the pleasure of having him so close, the feeling you get every time you see him, the way his lips feel on yours. you were not unsure about your feelings. not when it came to jeno. never when it came to him.
“i love you, too.”
and he kisses you like you’re his air. like you’re all he can breathe for the rest of his life, all he wants to breathe. and your head spins, your hands clutching onto his shoulders as he kisses you to the point where you can feel his love dripping out of him. and it’s like you’re living in the clouds, being able to kiss him felt like pure heaven. he let’s out a soft groan when you start to tug on his hair, fingers desperately wanting to clutch onto something. he wasn’t opposed to it though, not in the slightest. especially not when his own hand travels beneath the shirt you wore that just so happened to be his. you let out a sigh against his lips, and he swallows it up. his fingertips were so cold against your warm skin, making your shiver. he notices, pulling apart to chuckle breathlessly. you heave out a breath of your own, looking up at him under the dim lights of the room. and he swears he’s about to lose it.
“jeno,” you say his name with such delicacy, and it drives him insane. you notice him visibly starting to relax under the touch of your fingers coaxing him to fall deeper into you. “do you want to touch me?”
it was such a sudden question, making him look at you with wide eyes and a falter in his breathing. he laughs a bit as you pout at him, “i’m sorry,” he licks his lips which makes you look at him with longing, “what?”
“touch me,” you move the hand that’s on your side down to the waistband of your pants and underwear, biting your bottom lip. and you look so inviting like that, like his own personal angel. “please?”
his fingers twitch in your grasp at the soft plea, making him let out a frustrated noise. you savor the noise, watching as he leans down to press kisses down your jaw and neck, leaving a few marks to let everyone else know just who you belong to. the pretty sounds that leave your mouth make his cock stir to life. he wants to treat you well, make you feel his love. and he does, you do feel it.
as he hears the pretty noises you start to let out, he can’t help himself from rocking his hips into you, his hand still resting at the hem of your pants. but you want more. you need more of him. you whine, wiggling your hips up and brushing against him through his sweatpants. he sighs, resting his forehead against your shoulder as he rolls into you again to gain more friction. the action makes you tangle your hands in his hair tighter.
“jeno, please,” you beg, and you’ve never begged for anything like this before. you hear his deep chuckle, breathless.
“sorry, baby.” he leans back, fingers finally starting to pull down your leggings. you eagerly smile, happy to finally get him to do something. he’s quick to have your underwear and shirt joining along too, admiring how pretty you look laid out for him. you feel so vulnerable under his stare, while he sits fully clothed. but you can feel his admiration, making you filled with love. his love. “you’re so fucking ... beautiful.”
you laugh at his choice of words, your own hands making work of his shirt, lifting it over his head, “i can’t be the only one naked right now.” you end up stripping him of his shirt and sweatpants, admiring the bulge in his underwear. he looked so ethereal like this in front of you. he smiles at you, before leaning down and kissing you again, his fingers making contact with your wetness between your legs. he hums against you, his eyebrows furrowing.
“you’re so wet,” he comments, licking your bottom lip before softly biting down and capturing it between his teeth. the little noise you make goes straight south for him, his eyes darkening the longer he touches you. he presses tight circles against your clit all of a sudden, making your body jolt against him. he smiles to himself, the reaction he gets out of you making his ego float.
your core clenches around nothing, gasping against his lips as they hover against your own. you can feel and see the soft smile he has. your legs want to close in on him, but he leans back and pushes one of your legs to the bed, his fingers working faster against your clit which has your eyes rolling back in your head. he presses harder, getting a sweet reaction out of you.
“you’re so sensitive, baby.” he hums, watching as you start to thrash below him. he enjoys you like this. he inserts two of his fingers slowly, making you start to lose your mind. “and so tight.” he hisses, dragging his fingers along your inner walls. his eyes travel down from your face to your pussy, watching as his fingers disappear and reappear with each gentle thrust. he groans, starting to quicken his pace just to watch how wet you get for him. the sounds of your core clenching and sucking his fingers right back in make him feel dizzy, consumed by you.
“such a pretty cunt,” he says more-so to himself, but you hear it and it makes you buck your hips up. he catches this, licking his lips as the hand that’s holding onto your thigh tightens. you can feel his fingertips digging into the soft skin of your thigh, but you could really care less as jeno curls his fingers upwards to reach your sweet spot. he was so skilled with his fingers, more skilled than you thought.
“jeno,” you moan out his name, and he swears he’s heard an angel at this point.
“say it again,” he curls his fingers over and over again, hitting that sweet spongey spot inside of you with every quick thrust of his fingers, “say my name again.”
“god, jeno, you’re so good,” you whine, one of your hands reaching out to the hand on your thigh, feeling as he tightens his grasp there once again. your other hand is desperately clutching onto the sheets below you, back arching and your stomach tightening towards your release. “i.. i’m gonna c-cum.” you sigh, your voice threatening to give out.
and you’re so close to releasing all over his fingers, before he pulls them out with a satisfied look. when you go to whine at him, he pushes his fingers past your lips just so you can taste yourself. you suck and lick his fingers clean, his hooded eyes looking at you with hunger. he tilts his head a bit as he leans down again towards you, kissing you and shoving his tongue in your mouth so he can taste you too. the animalistic groan he let’s out goes straight to your core, your impending orgasm waiting to be finished.
“jeno, please please, let me cum,” you huff against his lips, looking at him with begging eyes. he swears he has never seen a sight so beautiful before.
“i want you to cum on my dick,” he states, making work to shove his underwear off his hips, “do you want that, pretty angel?”
you nod your head quickly, “yes, please. i want your cock inside me so bad, please give it to me.”
“don’t even have to tell you to beg,” he chuckles, and once his cock is out, you can’t help yourself from admiring it. you just knew you were dripping at this point, you can feel it running down your thighs. you sigh out, pulling him closer to you by his shoulders.
“fill me up, jeno.” you whisper in his ear, licking along the shell of it. he shudders against you, falling right into you and wanting nothing more than to please you. when you start to feel him lining up against you, he kisses you. and it’s so sweet. jeno was a romantic at heart, wanting nothing else than to make you happy. you could feel his love, just as he hoped you would. you could only hope he felt your love just as much. “i’m on the pill.” you weren’t a virgin, and neither was he. but you knew you needed to remind him anyway, despite being friends all these years and him knowing everything about you.
he kisses your cheek, “i know.” you would have laughed at the blatant answer, if it weren’t for him pressing the head of his cock into you and making you gasp. he slowly eases into you, “you’re so fucking tight, y/n.” he groans, his head falling into your shoulder again and letting out pants. your pussy clenches around him as he bottoms out, practically knocking the wind out of him. “stop that,” he rests his hands on either side of your head, leaning up again to look at you. “i’ll cum early.”
you laugh, “please move, jeno.” the second he starts to pull back and thrust right back in, one of your hands makes way to his hair and tugs. your other hand rakes down his back, nails digging. and he enjoys it so much, definitely adding pleasure to the way your cunt was swallowing him whole.
“fuck,” he shudders as he rhythmically moves inside you, “such a good girl.” he kisses you briefly before leaning back up and quickening the pace of his hips. the tip of his dick presses so good against your sweet spot, your previous orgasm creeping up on you slowly. you were almost embarrassed for how fast he had you tightening around him. he furrows his eyebrows, suddenly concentrated on you and the sweet noises and faces you make. “my pretty baby.”
you press your nails harder into his back, afraid you’ll leave marks but not stopping, “jeno, oh my god. you’re so-” you whine, unable to finish your sentence as he thrusts particularly harder just that once. “so good, so big.”
he chuckles, biting his lower lip. he was so unreal, so captivating and fucking you so good that you swore you had never felt so good in your entire life. he was putting his all into you. you were so unbearably wet, making the glide of his cock so much easier and feel so much better. you were starting to lose your mind, sweat covering both of your bodies by now.
“i want you to cum all over me,” he moves one of his hands to your clit, making tight circles once again that has your pussy gripping his dick, “want to feel you cum all over my cock and make a mess.”
your eyes roll into the back of your head, thighs starting to shake as you wrap them around his waist, bringing him closer, “jeno, oh fuck. please, i’m gonna cum, i wanna cum for you.”
he groans, the hand that isn’t incessantly rubbing your clit tightening into the sheets beside your head, he can feel his stomach threatening to snap but he wants you to cum for him first, wants to feel you fall apart.
“fucking cum, baby. let me feel you cum.”
his voice sets you off, a loud call of his name falling from your lips as you tighten around him over and over again, milking him for all he’s worth. jeno let’s out the prettiest noises as he releases into you finally, his hips riding out both of your highs as he stutters against you. it feels so good like that, to have him so close and to feel him fill you up so well.
nothing could beat this, absolutely nothing.
jeno was in love with you.
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“here,” jeno hands you your favorite drink, smiling subtly. and you thank him with a kiss on the cheek, a small gesture that always made jeno’s cheeks turn a bit pink. you loved the effect you had on him, even when he pouted as you giggled at his expense. “anything else?” he has hopeful eyes as you smile at him softly.
“i’m fine.” your response was short, and it seemed to have slightly caused a strain in his heart. “hm?” you asked subtly, not to cause too much attention to the problem. because, in all honesty, you weren’t sure what the problem was.
jeno’s mouth tilts up, “nothing.” he was just as short. and maybe that was where everything went wrong. you said nothing as you curtly nodded your head, looking back at your pile of papers that were messily scrambled all over your desk. you were a hard worker, and he admired you for it. but some days he wished he could have you to himself for once. he knew that wasn’t the case, though. he would never get you the way he wanted for very long.
his voice cuts the tense silence, “y/n.” and it sounds throughout the room, creating a bigger tension.
you look at him as he leans against your desk, his hip digging into the wood, “yeah?”
“i miss you.” it’s a quiet declaration, swimming through your head.
“i’m right here-”
he’s quick to object, furrowing his eyebrows, “but you’re not.” and that’s when the world beneath you starts to shatter.
you hated that he was right. you wanted to tell him that he’s wrong, prove him he’s not right about this one. but you just sat there, staring at him with slightly wide eyes. he wanted you to prove him wrong, too, but he knew you wouldn’t. and as the air turned thick and his chest became tighter, you became weaker. were you dragging him down?
“jeno, we’ve been best friends for how long?”
the question swims in his head, and he realizes what you’re saying. “since kids.”
you sigh, looking down at the pile of papers you have, “you know how goal oriented i am.” you look back at him and see he’s furrowing his eyebrows to hold back the small tears threatening to fall. “i can’t promise to always be the person you want, or the person you need. we both know how my past relationships went. i was the heartbreaker in the end.” you were so articulate with your response, and it made the hole in his chest bigger.
the room fell silent after this. both of you knew you were right this whole time. there were unsaid words hanging by a thread, but neither of you chose to speak. all you could hear was the disappointed sigh jeno let out. you stare at him, and you realize how painful this must really be for him. he fell in love with his best friend, just to have you push him away. you swallow harshly, looking away from him to gather your thoughts.
“i’m sorry.” you don’t apologize often, and it surprises him as you uncomfortably shift in your seat. “i love you, jeno. i do, i swear i do.”
jeno licks his lips and gulps, “i love you, too.”
you take one last look at your pile of papers, before getting up from your seat that was really starting to hurt your back. you spent way too many hours sitting there and pressing pencils and pens into papers. you make your way towards jeno, and when you reach him you see a new type of glimmer in his eyes. your hands reach out to him, cupping his face to show him that you were there. and you kiss him to prove that you’re not leaving. and it feels like life couldn’t get better than this, as cheesy as that sounds. because you had him, and he finally felt like he had you.
jeno was so, so in love with you. and he knew you were in love with him.
he was convinced that was all he needed.
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“i’m done!” you scream, rushing in your boyfriend’s room. you could feel the excitement bubbling in your chest as you catch sight of jeno with wet hair and glasses. he wasn’t wearing a shirt, just sweatpants. and that made him more beautiful in your eyes. you eyed him, smiling as he looks at you curiously.
“done with what?” he greets you with a soft kiss, but you’re eager for more as you grab his face and press your lips on his with fervour. he grunts into the kiss, hands quickly catching your hips and pulling you towards him. you sigh, a small noise escaping your throat. this was so familiar to you, and you loved it. you loved jeno.
“exams,” you pull back, catching your breath. he chuckles, staring at you with a shine in his eyes. “i finished exams finally. i’m all yours now.” jeno raises an eyebrow at this, looking at you with a playful glint. you roll your eyes, “you’re such a perve.”
“but you’re smiling,” he kisses you again, shutting you up for a minute. and while you would normally start to bicker back, you couldn’t bring yourself to this time as you trailed your fingers across the bare skin of his chest. his skin was so smooth, so soft under the touch.
and you really wouldn’t replace this moment for anything else. because, currently, you were on top of him, riding his cock like your life depended on it. you were unsure how things escalated so quickly, but sooner or later the both of you stripped of clothing and you were on his dick. and it felt so good to have him like this.
“baby,” his voice was raspy, lower than usual. your fingernails were digging into the soft skin on his chest, creating marks that were going to remind him for quite a few days just how good you make him feel. “you feel so, so good.”
jeno praising you send a jolt through your body, your walls unintentionally clenching around him, making him throw his head back. “jeno,” you whine, rocking your hips back and forth before bouncing on top of him again. and your thighs were definitely burning, but you could care less at this point. the expressions jeno was giving you were enough for you to keep going just for him. “fuck.” he was filling you up so well, his cock starting to twitch inside of you.
“yeah, baby? does it feel good?” he asks, his hands clutching onto your thighs like his life depended on it. but it felt so good, for some reason. the sting his fingers would give when he dug them in your skin was something you actually really enjoyed. “you just love using my cock, don’t you?”
your mouth hangs open, still not used to his filthy mouth. you were losing your mind, he was really starting to fuck you stupid. you moan, the noise going straight to jeno’s dick as he pushes his hips up to meet your own. you so desperately wanted to last longer, to make him cum first. but as he reaches over to press a thumb to your clit while you ride him faster, harder, you feel yourself losing grip on your sanity. jeno never failed to amaze you.
“jeno, fuck,” your nails dig harshly into his chest as he presses his hips into yours again, his thumb and cock bringing you closer and closer to the edge. “i’m so close.” you gasp out.
he hums back, a smirk playing on his face, “you can cum, baby. cum all over me like you always do.”
and you can’t find it in yourself to deny him, not when he feels this good and especially not when you’re so close. your core clenches around him so tight, almost making it impossible for him to move his cock in and out of you. the scream you let out of his name sends him right over the edge with you, your own name falling from his lips in groans. his and your nails are digging into one another’s skin, but neither of you are complaining. you can feel his cum start to drip down both of your thighs, making you whine as you look into his eyes. he was so fucked out, his hair messy from the bed and his eyes glazed over watching your every move. you could stay like this forever.
“jeno,” your voice sounded so tiny, and you sigh as you make a move to get off him. but not without him bringing your face to his for a small kiss.
“let me clean you up-”
“let’s take a bath,” you suggest, and he just nods his head while grabbing your hand and placing a soft kiss on the back of it. jeno was a romantic by heart, always giving you what you didn’t know you wanted and needed in your life. and as you two set the water to a temperature the both of you like, sinking into the water and cleaning one another; life felt so perfect right then and there. there was no replacing the feeling of jeno placing wet kisses on your shoulder, holding you close to him with your back against his chest.
“i love you.” and it’s so soft, a whisper in your ear that sends a shiver down your spine. but you’re never complaining.
“i love you more,” you whisper back, leaning into him even more. jeno helps clean you, sitting in the bath and creating a somewhat romantic atmosphere. it was so cheesy, but it was jeno. you were creating moments with jeno, and jeno alone. your eyes travel to one of his hands making move to intertwine with one of your own. you sigh, squeezing his hand.
jeno smiles, placing a kiss behind your ear, “i could stay like this forever.”
“the water will get cold,” you say back, a giggle bubbling in your chest as he scoffs. but he’s already smiling. “and we will be so pruny.”
at this, jeno lightly pinches your side with the hand that wasn’t holding yours. you let out a soft squeak, feeling and hearing the rumble of a laugh in his chest. “i’m trying to be cute here!”
you smile, tilting your head to lock eyes with him, “you don’t have to try.”
jeno scrunches his nose up at this, “okay, i see why you ruined it.” you roll your eyes, but there’s a smile on your face. jeno smiles back before leaning to give you a soft kiss.
maybe you do want to stay like this forever.
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“am i good enough for you?”
you come to a halt in your steps when you hear those words. the laundry in your hands slip a bit, making you come back to reality as you feel a shirt start to fall out of the basket. you catch it before it reaches the ground, but the question is still floating in the air. and there’s no describing the pain you feel as you heave a sigh out of your chest, placing the basket on the nearest surface. what made him ask such a question? but you don’t ask that. you can’t have him thinking he isn’t enough by asking another question. instead, you make way towards him and grab his face. the look in your eyes makes him falter a bit, regretting even asking the question. jeno wasn’t known for being too emotional, always keeping his distance at times. both of you were extremely respective of what the other would share emotionally. you understood one another’s feelings anyway, spoken or not.
“lee jeno, you are more than good enough for me.”
it makes his heart beat a little too quickly. your eyes were so determined, making him gulp. “i’m sorry, i’m not sure why i-”
“whoever made you think you’re not good enough,” you pause, eyes narrowing, “does not deserve you.”
and it sends him spiraling, the room falling silent at your words. you always manage to take his breath away, in every sense of the word. maybe this was when he truly realized he couldn’t live without you. maybe this was why he fell so deeply in love with you. maybe he didn’t need anyone else, but you. and as you hold his face in your hands, he can’t help from admiring you up close. you had such beautiful features, making him start to lose focus in everything that wasn’t revolved around you. was this toxic for him? was it unhealthy to be so in love with someone? he didn’t think so. not when it came to you, never when it came to you.
“i’m in love with you.”
your eyes turn wide. was this a different way of saying ‘i love you’? you didn’t think so. you saw this as a deeper meaning of it, something neither of you have discussed. in the midst of falling in love with jeno, you never thought he would outright say he was in love with you. jeno wasn’t too keen on heavy feelings, always resulting in the two of you bickering, but not really bickering. you were both playful, never too serious. it was one of the reasons the two of you got along so well. but staring into jeno’s eyes in this very moment in time, you realize that isn’t the case this time. he was serious, too serious.
but maybe you were, too.
“i’m in love with you, too.”
he kisses you like you’re his air. like you’re all he needs to breathe for the rest of his life. and maybe he’s convinced that you are his air, that you are all he needs to breathe for the rest of his life. jeno was not going to deny the feelings he had for you, even if it killed him. even if you didn’t really feel the same for him. he would always choose you. time and time again, he would choose you. and the way your lips meld with his own like you depend on one another, it was all he needed.
you are all he needs.
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“happy twelve months.”
you lean your head into your hand, staring at him with a raised eyebrow, “jeno, just say one year.” you’re smiling, there’s no denying that fact. you could feel excitement bubbling up in your chest the longer you sit there, face scrunching up further.
jeno rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. he’s definitely smiling. “at least act excited.”
you quickly get up from your seat, “happy one year, jeno.” the sweet kiss you press to his lips serve justice in ways words couldn’t. the two of you always struggled verbally, never having enough words to justify your feelings. but in this moment while kissing him so softly and sweetly, you realize that you don’t need words all the time. it was the little things that brought you closer. it was times like these in one another’s embrace, lips locked, hearts connected. these moments counted the most.
“i love you,” he whispers against your lips. and you know it means so much more than those three words. you know he’s laying his heart on the line for you, declaring his love in the only ways he knows how. and you don’t ask for more than this. you could never ask for more than this.
“i love you, too.” and he accepts your declaration of love back, his body practically molding with your own as he holds you closer and kisses you rougher. his tongue comes in contact with your own, a sigh falling from the back of your throat. and he couldn’t imagine this with anyone else, but you. it would always be you. he knows this.
the rising sun shines on your skin, making you look ethereal in his eyes as he pulls apart from you. you look like an angel to him. he smiles at you, his hands on your waist and his heart beating fast. he takes a mental picture in his head, making sure to keep this memory forever. you seem to break him out of his trance as you start to chuckle, and he can’t stop himself from smiling back. you had a glow to you that was shining right back onto him. whatever you felt, he felt it, too. was this apart of being in love? he wasn’t complaining if it was.
“earth to jeno,” you sing, hand coming up to run your fingers through his hair. he leans into your touch, humming.
“just admiring you,” he responds, seeing the way your face flickers with embarrassment. he chuckles back when you shoot a glare at him. jeno wasn’t known for being extremely straight-forward, but he did always manage to say what was on his mind. you adored him regardless.
“shut up,” but you just can’t seem to help yourself.
jeno laughs, throwing his head back with a wide smile on his face, “you’re cute when embarrassed.” he kisses your cheek, “my flustered baby.”
your eyes widen, “where the hell is this coming from? are you learning from jaemin, or something?!”
he smiles, his eyes scrunching up, “not the point.”
you roll your eyes, about to shoot back another remark, but he seems to know this because next thing you know his lips are back on yours. and you were definitely not going to pass up a kiss from your boyfriend. especially when he tastes like fresh mint and a hint of your cherry chapstick that he borrowed. you sigh, the feeling of home spreading throughout your body. jeno was your own form of home. and that was more than enough for you.
spending a year with jeno; definitely well spent.
“anniversary sex?” he asks, voice low and turning dark.
you giggle, lips trailing down his jaw and neck before biting playfully, “absolutely.”
and you can feel his love pouring out of him as he fucks you into the bed, your legs spread just for him. his cock stretching you like always. his eyes were intense that night, eyeing you and demanding you keep your focus on him the whole entire time. his movements were languid, dragging out the pleasure for as long as he could. he locks one of his hands with yours, the other digging into your thigh. and he admires you like this, falling apart just for him.
“you take my cock so well,” he breathes, dick twitching inside of you when you clench at the praise. “fuck, angel. so tight.”
you whine, “jeno, please, faster.”
he so desperately wanted to drag this out for as long as he could, but he could barely handle it anymore. there was sweat forming on his forehead, his lungs gasping for air as you start to sporadically tighten around his cock. and he can’t seem to deny you both the pleasure any longer, finally picking up speed and the sounds of skin on skin echoing into the room alongside your pretty moans of his name. he lives for this, lives to please you.
“jesus,” he grunts, “your sweet pussy is so good, and all for me to take.”
you nod your head, the hand that wasn’t holding his scratching down his back, “yes, yes. all yours, jeno.” and he approves of this, a groan falling past his lips. you can’t hold yourself for much longer. “i’ll cum, i’m gonna cum, jeno.”
jeno smiles at this, leaning down to lick at your bottom lip before biting softly, “look at me,” your eyes lock, “cum, baby. cum on my cock.”
you fall apart for him, his own cum filling you up and bringing you back to earth as you struggle to leave your eyes open to stare at him. but he has such a pretty expression as he cums, his eyebrows furrowed and his mouth slightly agape. he was breathtaking, absolutely beautiful in your eyes. you feel his hand tighten around your own as he cums, leaning his head down to the crook of your neck after. you can feel his heavy breathing and the soft kisses he’s placing there. you smile, reaching your other hand up to stroke his hair. he practically purrs for you, his body further leaning into you.
“happy one year, y/n.”
you laugh, exhaustion hitting, “happy one year, jeno.”
jeno loves you, and you love him.
and you know that’s enough.
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a/n: i hope it was everything you could want :(
taglist: just the girl i’m in love with @junguws​ i wrote this mainly for her haha
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leejenos · 10 months ago
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jeno with a samoyed (aka his twin) 🐕
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amorajae · 4 months ago
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Love Me (Not) | L.JN
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PAIRING | Lee Jeno x Reader 
SUMMARY | You’re assigned as a tutor to the one person that made your high school life miserable, but when Jeno comes up with a proposal to get back in your good books after three years of not seeing him, you wonder whether he’s really changed or if it’s just another game to him. 
GENRE | smut, college/university!AU, hockey!AU, hockey player!Jeno, enemies to lovers.
WARNINGS | sexual content, making out, fingering, orgasm denial, thigh riding, praise kink, oral sex, lots of sexual bantering, swearing. 
WORD COUNT | 13.3k 
A/N | Soooo my brain went wild after reading “Of Captains and College Boys” by @neocitybynight (here’s the link to the series masterlist, check it out) and I just had to write this. As a Canadian, I don’t play hockey, but I grew up with a lot of classmates talking about the sport, so I hope that my descriptions are somewhat accurate.
TAGLIST | @johnyusangel @hellabts @sprngfeverr @ajhdr @aa-ronpa @atletino @pietromaximoffprotectionsquad @tyongff-ff @nct-esn @jwisungcutie @heirans @bockhyun @crescentjen @nohyuckist @lenaluvs @unexpect3d @harrythefarmer @pewpewpwe00 @studeyley @starrywheein @stayzenniesstuff @pretty-junjun @dreamyyang​​
Part 1 / Part 2 / Masterlist
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“…and as society progresses, we need to be able to understand the constructs that block us from changing the past mentalities that already exist. Any questions?”
Monday afternoon. You had been stuck in lecture halls all day, this being the third class that you’d had to sit through. It wasn’t really a bother to you, since you had always been academically inclined, but you were running on less hours of sleep than you normally would and that coffee you consumed earlier didn’t seem to be helping much. Around you, it seemed like many of your colleagues also felt the same, some dozing off in the back while others rubbed their eyes. You couldn’t blame them honestly – contemporary problems in modern society was a topic that could put even you to sleep, but you weren’t paying thousands of dollars for a degree in sleep. This was your elective class and it was supposed to give you a break from your classes in the interaction design program, but you were starting to think that for some, it was a bit too much of a break.
The young woman at the front of the room searched the rows for any raised hands, finding none as she nodded to herself and walked back to the desk. “If no one has anything to ask, we’ll call it a day. Remember to read chapter four of the textbook and get those reflections in by next week!”
Relieved to be dismissed, the hall filled with the chatter of students as they packed up their bags and headed out. You walked down the steps to the front, the young woman’s face brightening as you approached her.
“Hey,” you greeted. “Jaehyun said that you needed to talk to me?”
She nodded, straightening up. “Yes, I do need to talk to you. How are you doing in your classes?”
You raised an eyebrow. “Mira, you know exactly how I’m doing.”
“Just asking,” she said, raising her hands in mock surrender. “Who knows whether you’ve finally lost your mind and spiraled into the depths of insanity with the amount of work you do?”
Okay, she had you there. It wasn’t your fault that you were a workaholic – you just liked being busy and if that meant working on projects in your spare time, you considered it productive. You weren’t a fan of the university party scene, with all the drinking and alcohol-fueled troubles that people got into. In fact, you rarely went out with friends because you preferred staying inside and you were going to keep it that way until you finished your degree.
“Anyways, I didn’t call you over to judge your work habits,” she continued. “I came to ask you for a favour.”
“Mira-“
“Please, just hear me out.”
You sighed and motioned for her to continue. She reached into her stack of folders and pulled out an assignment that clearly was marked all over in red pen, handing it to you. You remembered this – it was one of the first reflections you had been assigned to write. Frowning, you looked through, searching for a name but unable to find one due to the markings all over the papers.
“Mira, why are you showing me this?” you asked, handing it back to her.
“I need you to tutor him,” she explained. “This is the only class he’s failing because he just doesn’t want to put in the work. His writing is always half-assed and it’s not even on the topics that we covered for that week. According to the registrar, he’s doing somewhat well in all of his other classes except for this one.”
She reached over to clasp your hands with hers. “Sanchez is putting a lot of trust in me to lead the lectures instead of her, which isn’t something that you see a TA doing, but if he keeps getting low marks, it’s either going to make me seem like a hard marker or it’s going to make me seem like I can’t do my job.”
Oh, Mira, you thought. You had always liked the woman, having graduated from the same high school as her and happening to attend the same university as well. She was older than you by four years and had already finished her degree, but had been brought back by the institution to work as an official teacher’s assistant to Loreia Sanchez. It wasn’t common at all for a TA to be leading lectures as opposed to labs, but she was good at what she did and you really would feel terrible if one student’s mark risked her position. She truly was a kind person, but it was the expression on her face that make you give in.
“Fine, I’ll do it,” you sighed.
Mira excitedly clapped her hands. “Wonderful! This’ll be a great opportunity for you to get out and talk to people more. I swear, the only friends you have are the walls of your apartment and that one figurine of John Wick.”
“I actually have two, thank you very much,” you corrected.
“That’s not helping your case, you know. You need human interaction outside of classes, which means actually going out and starting conversations with others.”
You gave her an amused look. “Big talk coming from someone who nearly flunked their first two years from partying so much.”
There was a sheepish grin on her face. “I was in a relationship at the time. It was a mistake, I’ll tell you that, but lots of good lessons learned.”
She began packing her bag as you waited for her, leaning against the desk. Now that you thought about it, you would have to rearrange your schedule a little bit in order to find time to tutor whoever this person was. Speaking of, you actually didn’t know who it was. Probably should’ve asked.
“I didn’t see a name on that paper,” you said as the TA zipped her bag and looked up at you. “Who’s the person I’m working with?”
“Oh, that’s probably my fault. I went a little overboard with making my comments. It’s Lee Jeno. Same year as you.”
It was who now?
“Lee Jeno? As in high school Lee Jeno?” you questioned.
“Yup, same guy. Funny how he ended up at the same university as you. Didn’t you used to say that you hated him or something like that?”
Did you hate Jeno? No. Did you despise him with your entire being? Absolutely.
To put it simply, Jeno was the one kid that you grew up with throughout elementary school and the second he entered high school, he became one of those cocky, loud, groupie fuckboys that would ask to go to the bathroom so that he could go into other classes and flirt with the younger years. The memory of seeing the freshman girls swoon over his boyish charms and smile made you want to vomit in your mouth. It was obvious how fake the whole act was when in reality, he was just as bad as the others. You had been fairly quiet in high school, choosing to keep to yourself and move around with only a select group of friends, but that hadn’t stopped Jeno from making you his target. You really didn’t know what you had done to annoy him, but you suspected that your overall presence in general was something that pissed him off. It turned out that in your final year, he had suddenly decided to move to another city and you never heard of him again. In fact, you hadn’t even known that he was in your university, let alone this class.
“He doesn’t show up for lectures,” Mira commented, as if sensing your confusion. “Apparently it conflicts with his schedules for varsity hockey and he has to do it online, but he does pop in to submit his assignments. I just can’t figure out why he’s doing so poorly in this class when he’s passing all of his others.”
“What program is he even in?” you asked as the pair of you walked out of the lecture hall. The hallways were somewhat empty, the majority of the students having finished their classes already and headed home for the day.
“Business,” she answered. “It’s an easy choice for a lot of athletes, since they can spend more time at practices than actually studying. Can’t say that it reflects well on their marks, but I’m not one to judge.”
The TA led you over to one of the on-campus coffee shops, ordering for you as well as you handed your student pass for her to pay with. She shook her head, scanning hers instead and turning to you with a grin.
“Faculty get free everything, remember?”
Handing you the cup of coffee, you thanked her and took a sip, the feeling of hot caffeine in your system warming you from the inside. You enjoyed spending time with her – she was probably one of the few people on campus that you genuinely felt comfortable being around.
“So,” you said after taking another sip. “How often am I required to tutor this guy?”
“Once a week,” she replied. “Even if it’s just looking over his reflections and giving him pointers on how to improve them, it’ll be better than nothing. I feel like he’s smart enough to understand the material, but he’s just too lazy to do the work and chooses to submit something half-assed to say that he at least did it.”
She reached for her phone, typing something quickly and sending it to you, your own phone vibrating in your jacket pocket as you took it out.
“This is his number. I managed to get it from the student records and I’ve already let him know that he’s going to be getting a tutor. He doesn’t know it’s you, but maybe he won’t be as bad as he was before.”
You snorted. “I doubt it, but thanks. I’ll send him a message later once I get back home.”
Mira gave you a grateful look. “You have no idea how much you’re helping me out with this. I know you’ll get through to him, just give it some time.”
Giving you a warm hug, she raised a hand in good-bye as the two of you parted ways, heading towards her car as you walked towards the bus stop. It was late autumn, the leaves of the trees already shades of red and yellow as a cool breeze ruffled your hair, just before the halfway point of the semester. You didn’t have any midterm exams, but you knew of people that did and you were thankful that you had chosen a relatively safe program. Instead of exams, you got projects that took you hours, but it was better than having to sit and memorize material that you would never actually use.
The bus ride home was quick, dropping you off a block away from your apartment. It was a small place, nothing too exciting and fairly decent for the price you were paying for monthly rent. Your aunt and uncle had been kind enough to help you cover the cost of housing, while you agreed to take on paying for the tuition. They were kind souls, the two of them. Much nicer people than your parents had ever been. Pushing the button for the elevator, you waited for it to arrive, sighing when you noticed that it was nowhere close to the ground floor. The stairs it was.
Pulling out your keys, you opened the door to your cozy home, throwing the jangling metal onto the counter as you shrugged your bag off. Heading towards the couch, you slumped down onto it and closed your eyes, the quiet of the space bringing your mind some relief. You really needed to stop forcing yourself to work on projects so late. Not only was it messing up your sleep schedule, but the amount of screen time was killing your eyes as well. Maybe Mira was right – maybe it was time that you stop holing yourself up indoors and actually went out for once, live a little bit.
Nah, that’s not happening.
In your pocket, you felt the weight of your phone. The screen was still on Jeno’s contact number when you unlocked it, your lip curling in slight disdain at the sight of his name. God, you really didn’t want to do this. Why had you even agreed? You needed to stop trying to make everyone happy and just say no for once. With a sigh, you pressed the message icon beside his contact.
You (6:23 PM): Hey, it’s the chick you bullied throughout high school, remember me?
No, he wouldn’t have cared enough to remember. Erasing the message, you tried again.
You (6:23 PM): Hi, I’m your tutor for the contemporary problems class, Mira gave me your number.
You contemplated adding a smiley face on the end for good measure, but you opted out of it. Pressing send, you placed your phone face down against the coffee table and closed your eyes.
Ding.
Snapping your eyes open, you grabbed the phone and unlocked it. He had replied.
L.J (6:25 PM): yo whats up
God, even his texting screamed ‘massive fuckboy with attention issues’.
You (6:26 PM): Mira told me that you’re failing her class, so I’ll be helping you with your work until the end of the semester or until you’re fine on your own.
You (6:26 PM): Is there any time we can meet this week?
The little circles indicated that he was typing, but it wasn’t until much later that you got a response from him. You had been in the middle of making dinner when your phone had chimed.
L.J (8:04 PM): i can do thurs 5-7
You (8:05 PM): That’s fine, we’ll meet in the commons. See you then.
After a minute, you sent another message.
You (8:06 PM): Mira’s TA job could be on the line if you don’t pass this class, so at least try to be on time, thanks.
There. That was better.
You spent the rest of the week busying yourself with your work and trying to put the meeting with Jeno out of your mind. You weren’t sure whether it was nerves or just annoyance at having to see the person that had made you feel miserable during high school, but when you walked into the commons, there was only steely determination to not let him get on your nerves. Who knows, maybe he had changed since then and was a different person.
The second he walked in, you felt your mood sour. He looked around until he noticed you, your hand raised in a half wave to let him know you were the person he was looking for. Walking over, you noticed the way his chain glittered in the light, his black hair hidden under a cap. When he sat down, he shot you a flirty wink.
“Mira didn’t tell me I’d get a hot tutor.”
Nope, he hadn’t changed. Jeno was still the same arrogant prick as he was before.
“You must’ve found the wrong person then,” you said, no hint of amusement in your voice.
His eyes went wide for a slight second, then the cool expression was back on his face as he leaned back in the chair. “Damn, all business. Alright, alright. I see how it is.”
You reached into your bag to pull out the folder of his assignments that Mira had given you yesterday. Pushing it towards him, you crossed your arms as he opened it and looked through.
“Why are you handing me my work?” he asked.
“You’re failing,” you stated. “This is the one class that you’re not passing and if you keep it up, it’ll threaten your spot on the hockey team.”
He snorted. “There’s no way that Coach Suh will pull me. I’m just too good of a player for him to let go of.”
You shook your head. “Coaches care just as much about your education as they do your talent. If you want to keep playing, you need to be at least passing all of your classes by the time the semester ends.”
Jeno narrowed his eyes at the papers, pushing them aside as he turned his attention to you and leaned in with a smirk. “And what about you? Little Miss Perfect, I’m assuming? Got all your assignments in on time and getting straight As?”
“Why does it matter what my grades are?” you shot back.
“I’m just saying, you’re probably the type to spend hours on something that doesn’t matter in the end because no one gives a shit about your grades when they hand you that diploma. It’s just getting you off their hands as fast as possible.”
There was a wicked glint in his eyes as he grinned. “I bet you’re still a fucking virgin, too. Never been to a party or gotten high either.”
You maintained eye contact with him as he leaned back into his chair again and crossed his arms, mirroring your position. He was playing with you, trying to see if you would be as easy to bend and break as the other girls he probably messed around with. There was something about his attitude that just really set you off, a little voice in your head telling you to swing a fist at his face, get revenge for everything that he put you through. Instead, you settled for clearing your throat nonchalantly.
“Listen here, hotshot,” you said. “I’m not in the mood for your little tricks and games. I don’t give a damn whether you’re the ace or a fucking water boy on the hockey team. My job is to make sure you don’t fail that elective class and if you make this hard for me, both Mira and the coaches are going to know.”
It was your turn to lean in. “And don’t go talking about me like you know my life story. You’re just as big of a dick now as you were in high school and I truly hope that whoever you sleep with next gives you a fucking STD.”
Jeno stared at you as you stood up, snatching the folder away from his side of the table as you reached for your bag and jacket. Before you left, however, you turned back to give him a saccharine smile that didn’t meet your eyes.
“You’ve got a week to get that reflection done, since Mira’s being nice enough to push back the due dates for us. If you’re not here next week with the paper in hand, you’ll find yourself watching your next match from the bench.”
With that, you left him in the commons.
The next Thursday, you sat yourself at the same table at precisely five o’clock, your right leg tapping against the ground as you waited for Jeno to show. There had been no messages from him saying that he would be late or needed to reschedule, so you were expecting him to be here. A couple of minutes later, he sauntered into the commons, paper in hand as he approached the table and tossed it without a care in your direction.
“Can I leave now?” he asked.
“Nice try, Lee. Sit your ass down.”
As he exaggeratedly let out a groan, you paid him no attention as you began reading his reflection. This week’s topic was manipulation within social media platforms and while you had finished yours already, you weren’t so sure about Jeno’s.
Frowning, you reached the end and turned the paper towards him, opening your mouth to speak as you noticed that his had his phone out. Pursing your lips, you felt like a mother tugging the device out of his hands, holding it above your head as he reached for it.
“Come on, don’t be a bitch,” he grumbled.
“You can have it back at the end. Now, tell me why you included this when it doesn’t pertain to the topic.”
Begrudgingly, he looked at where you were pointing, taking a moment to read the sentence. When he was finished, he looked back up at you. “I don’t know, it makes the word count bigger so I added it in.”
“It has nothing to do with the topic of the reflection.”
“So? Not like anyone’s going to notice.”
You glared at him. “Jeno, are you a fucking idiot? Of course, someone’s going to notice. What, you think professors just look at your name on the page and decide that they’re going to give you a passing grade? Don’t be ridiculous.”
He slipped off his cap and ran a hand through his hair, smoothing it down before putting it back on. “What do I do about it then?”
“First off, get rid of that entire section that doesn’t make sense,” you said. “I don’t care that it cuts down your word count. Second, you probably have tons of social media accounts, so isn’t there something you’ve noticed about the apps you use that you could interpret as manipulation?”
There was a moment of silence as he thought about it. Jeno thinking? It can’t be, you thought to yourself. For a second, his eyes widened slightly as something seemed to come to mind, but once he saw you watching, his expression turned back into his usual cocky smirk.
“You’re not good at hiding things,” you remarked, raising an eyebrow. “Now, whatever came to mind, write it down and send me a draft of it later. If I give it the all-clear, you can hand it in and there’s your mark for the week. I have a project that needs finishing, so I’m heading off.”
His hand shot out to grasp your wrist as you moved, pulling you back down into the chair. “Not so fast. We’re not done here.”
You eyed him suspiciously. “I’m not sucking your dick as payment for anything.”
“What? No, the fuck?”
Checking the time on your phone, you made up your mind. “You have five minutes and then I leave.”
“Let’s make a deal,” he said, eyes twinkling. “I’ll keep coming to these weekly meetings without trying to skip. In return, you give me until the end of the semester to get back in your good books and make you like me.”
You were at a loss for words as you sat there, staring at Jeno’s stupid face as he waited eagerly for your response. Did he really think that this was going to make up for all the years of bullying and teasing? He had no idea how much it crushed your self-esteem and confidence, no idea about the number of times you had cried at home, locked away in your room because his words kept ringing in your ears. He had no fucking idea and he had the audacity to come back into your life with such a request.
“No. Now fuck off.”
Pulling your wrist away, you grabbed your jacket and your bag, walking away from him without another word. He was quick to stand up, running after you until he managed to get in front of you and block your path.
“Please, just listen to me, okay?”
You were quiet as he continued. “I know I was dick, I admit it. You probably think I still am and that’s fine, but just give me a chance to make it right. Just one.”
Sensing the stares of the people around you as they regarded Jeno, his hands out to the sides like an idiot, you sighed in defeat. “Fine, one chance. If you fuck this up, I never want to see you again.”
He closed his eyes in relief. “Thank god. You won’t regret this, trust me.”
You won’t regret this, trust me.
His words echoed in your ears as you pressed the button for the elevator, listening as the sound of metal groaning and cables moving against each other filled the hallway. From a couple of doors down, Mrs. Portman waved to you, a smile forming on your face as you waved back. A sweet woman, she was. You remembered how she had knocked on your door when you had first moved in, a tin can of freshly-baked cookies and a warm pie in hand as she welcomed you to the building. She was in her late sixties, going into her seventies, but her heart remained golden and her mind young. You wished your life was as simple as hers. There was a never a moment when she wasn’t smiling, lighting up the dull corridors of the building with the way that her eyes turned into crescents when she laughed.
Trust me.
Could you trust him? Hell, this was Lee Jeno you were talking about. Fuckboy extraordinaire. You had been unlucky enough to have to hear him recounting countless drunk nights to his friends, always with some new chick that called everyone ‘girly’ and had those annoying acrylic nails that drove you mad with the need to rip them off. It was always Jeno this, Jeno that. You couldn’t get away from him, no matter how you had tried then.
Three years had passed since you had last seen him. Could you really expect him to change your mind?
Entering your apartment, you placed your bag on the chair by the door and threw yourself onto the couch, face smushed against the pillows. Letting out a loud groan, you let yourself relax for a second before standing up to go take a shower, feeling the need to forget the events of today. By the time you were out, two new messages had appeared on your phone.
L.J (7:28 PM): sent u the new draft, can u check it over
L.J (7:28 PM): i have practice at 8 so i’ll look at any comments u made after
You (7:42 PM): Sure, will look at it now.
Your fingers hovered over the screen, as you debated sending another message.
Ah, fuck it.
You (7:43 PM): Have fun at practice, don’t get hurt.
Setting it down, you went to dry your hair, missing the reply as the sound of the hair dryer muted every other noise.
L.J (7:45 PM): thx, don’t be up too late :)
Could you trust Jeno? You weren’t sure, but you had already agreed to give him a chance and you would keep your word until he gave you a reason not to. You could only hope that this wasn’t going to be a mistake.
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"Come to my match this weekend."
You looked up from your laptop, entirely forgetting what you were about to write as you stared. Jeno? In a library of all places? It couldn't be.
"Are you lost?"
"What?"
"I said, are you lost?"
"What do you mean by lost?"
Lifting a hand, you motioned vaguely to the space around you. "This is a library, where people come to do actual work and study. You neither do work nor study, so that's why I'm asking if you're lost."
Rolling his eyes, the jock reached over to the neighbouring table and grabbed a chair, pulling it over to yours as he sat down across from you. His hair was once again hidden underneath that same black cap he always wore, but you noticed that it seemed lighter than usual. In fact, it looked blue.
"New hair?
He grinned, slipping the cap off and running a hand across the top to smooth it down. "Jaemin asked me to do it with him because he lost a bet to one of the seniors. Of course, I'm a wonderful friend and wouldn't ever let my bros down, so we went yesterday to get it done. You like it?"
Sighing, you turned back towards your laptop. "You look like a blue highlighter."
"A sexy blue highlighter, you mean."
"In your dreams, Lee."
Jeno leaned forward across the table, pressing the power button on your laptop as you tried in vain to smack his hand away. Shooting him a glare, you moved to press it again but he had already closed the lid, forcing your attention upon him.
"Come watch me play this weekend."
"No."
"Oh, come on! You have nothing better to do than lock yourself up in your room and be an antisocial bitch. Live a little for once."
Grabbing his wrist, you shoved his arm away from your laptop and flipped it back open. At least you were smart enough to remember that the save button existed, or that visual mockup for your interface class would've been lost and you would've had to start all over again. Jeno watched as you pointedly ignored him, eyes focused on your work as you avoided making eye contact with him. The longer you didn't give him what he wanted, the quicker he would go away.
Or so you thought.
You were surprised to see that even an hour later, he was still sitting across from you, scrolling through his phone silently as you worked. It was getting late and your bus would be here soon, so when you stood up to pack your bag, he was startled.
"Leaving already?"
"It's almost eight, Lee. Unlike you, I have actual adulting responsibilities that I need to take care of back at my place."
"We're literally the same age," he said. "Barely adults as it is."
"Explains a lot about you, doesn't it?"
"Pot, meet kettle."
God, he was annoying.
Turning your back on him, you began walking towards the doors, Jeno following suite. It was Friday evening and the hallways were empty. Usually, it was a bustle of students trying to finish last minute assignments and get them printed, but it was the day before the weekend and it felt like the only two souls occupying the entire campus were you and the blue-haired jock.
"Could you slow down a bit?" you heard him grumble from behind you.
"What, stamina a little low these days?"
He scoffed. "Considering how long I last in bed, that's the furthest thing from it."
"A minute isn't that long," you replied. "Surprised that girls still want to sleep with you even with a dick as small as yours."
Arriving at the elevator, you pressed the button to call it down, the doors opening almost immediately. Stepping in, you were tempted to close the doors on Jeno, but he seemed to be expecting it and slapped a hand over the panel, blocking you off. The proximity of his body to yours was close and when you thought about it, this was probably the closest you had ever been to him physically. He stood there as the doors closed, hand moving to the red button and forcing the elevator to a halt, standing up to full height as he loomed over you.
"Congrats, champ. You know how to stop an elevator. Want a medal for that?" you muttered.
"You're being a bitch again."
"And you're being a dick. Well done for pointing out the obvious."
You noticed the way that his jaw tensed, eyes hardening as he took a step forward and you took one back, pinned against the elevator wall as if in some cliché romance flick. There was nowhere to look but him, the drawstrings of his hoodie brushing against your jacket as he leaned in. He had a mole under his eye. Had he always had a mole there?
"You know," he said. "You're not doing a very good job of letting me back into your life."
"I never said I was planning on doing so," you said. “Besides, I’m waiting for you to prove to me that you deserve it.”
"You know you don't actually hate me."
"On the contrary," you snapped at him. "You're just like the rest, Lee. Thinking that your looks and dick game can get you anything. News flash, that's not how it works and the day you realize it will be a day too late."
He was silent for a second before stepping back with a sigh, retreating to the other side as you stood unmoving. Once you were satisfied with the distance, you turned back to the elevator panel and pushed the same button he had pressed earlier, the red light blinking off as the metal cage moved once more. It shook slightly as it resumed, making you lose your balance for a second and forcing you grabbed onto the railing to stabilize yourself. You missed the way that Jeno reached out towards you, hands outstretched as if to stop you from falling.
Neither of you said a word for the rest of the ride.
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The supermarket was quiet as you went in, the idle music in the background filling the space as you looked around. Sure, eleven on a Tuesday night wasn't the best time to be grocery shopping but you had fallen asleep at your desk and realized that it was past dinner time as the dark of the sky had stared back at you through your window. There were just too many projects that you needed to get done and it didn't help that you had turned to excessive snacking to fuel your energy levels.
Humming along with the music, you weaved through the produce aisles, mindlessly picking fruit as you let your body move on autopilot for a while. You were surprised at how empty the building was, with only one cashier still working. Maybe they closed at twelve.
Reaching the snacks, you carefully browsed through the options, trying to make a conscious effort to not grab the first thing that your eyes landed on. Popcorn? You could skip. Fuzzy peaches? You didn't need them this week. Cadbury mini eggs? Now that was something you couldn't live without. You cheered internally as you noticed the final pack tucked in the back, a sole bag waiting to be claimed. Come to mama, you thought, eagerly reaching for it.
And then it was no longer there.
You turned to glare at the person who had swiped your precious chocolate away from you, only to find yourself face to face with one Lee Jeno, dressed in a pair of athletic sweatpants and a dark blue hoodie. He smirked, lifting his hand in a little wave as he sauntered away with a laugh.
That fucker.
Immediately, you grabbed the back of his hoodie, pulling him back towards you as you wrapped an arm around his side to grasp at the chocolate. He let out a grunt as you elbowed him, forcing him to fumble with the bag as you snatched it away from him.
"That's my chocolate," you hissed at him.
"Jesus, what are you? Gollum?"
"Am I what, excuse me?"
"Gollum," he repeated. "You know, the creepy ex-hobbit that hides in a cave and talks to himself?"
You stared.
"Lord of the Rings?" he tried again.
"Haven't seen it."
"God, you're so uncultured."
It was strange to see Jeno without his usual black cap, his blue hair slightly ruffled from your attempts to get the chocolate back. You hadn't noticed it earlier, but he was wearing glasses, the light glinting across the rims, his eyes blinking at you from behind thick lenses.
"Fucking four eyes," you teased.
"Shut up. I wear contacts."
"Do your buddies know that you wear glasses?"
He leaned forward until he was level with you. "Making fun of my looks isn't nice, you know."
You smiled sweetly at him before turning on your heel and calling over your shoulder. "Now you know how I felt all those years ago."
You ran into him again when you went back to the dairy section, reaching for a tub of yogurt as he did the same. Hand landing on top of his, you pulled back suddenly, giving him the chance to swipe it away from the shelf.
"Fuck off and find your own yogurt," he smirked.
"I had my eyes on it first," you shot back.
Placing it into his basket, he grinned at you, eyes mischievous. "Should've been faster then."
As he walked away, you rolled your eyes. "Prick," you muttered, grabbing a tub of yogurt and placing it in your basket.
When you were finished, you made your way towards the cashier, noticing that Jeno was also approaching from the other side. Speeding up, you pushed yourself in front of him, successfully forcing him to wait behind you as the cashier raised an eyebrow. There was a huff from the jock, causing you to smile as you began unloading your items onto the conveyor belt.
"Did you find everything alright?" the cashier asked. You nodded, giving her a smile as you subtly slipped a hand behind your back and flipped him off. He poked his tongue into his cheek, placing a hand in his pocket as he paced around, waiting for his turn.
Find your own goddamn yogurt, my ass.
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Benchwarmer (8:46 PM): come over
Your eyes flickered up to the notification as it appeared on your screen, thumb swiping it away when you saw who it was from. Jeno's contact name had been upgraded to something that wasn't his initials and if you were being honest, it suited him. Apparently, he had been benched during one of his last matches for showing up to practice an hour late. You knew exactly what he had been doing during that hour - the hickeys on his neck explained enough. The sight of walking in on him and some brunette having a go at it in the library had almost triggered your gag reflex then and there, the image burned into the backs of your eyes for the rest of that day.
Jeno, however, was persistent and as your screen was bombarded with constant notification pop-ups, you were starting to get annoyed. It wasn't until an incoming call with his name on it made you finally pay attention to him.
"The fuck do you want?" you snapped at him.
"I'm bored, so come over," was his reply, the sound of shuffling heard from his end.
"Wrong person, Lee. I'm not your booty call."
"But you're probably sitting at home doing nothing, so why not just come over? The rest of the guys are out for the night."
"And do what? Listen to you talk about how big the tits are of some girl you’re fucking?”
"I'll have you know that tits are fucking amazing and-"
"I really don't need to know, thanks."
"What, jealous?"
You snorted. "As if. The last thing I care about is your sex life."
"You should care about yours though," he said. "It's practically nonexistent."
"Oh, sorry. I forgot that it's not considered normal for people to care about something other than who they're going to stick their dick in next."
There was a pause for a second, followed by a loud thump and the sound of a muffled groan of pain.
"I'm fine, thanks for asking," came Jeno's voice, sounding distant from the phone.
"You're welcome," you shrugged, reaching for the bag of chocolate that lay opened on the coffee table. You were surprised that you hadn't annihilated the whole thing yet. Maybe you did have more self-control than you thought.
"So," he said suddenly.
"So?" you questioned.
Your phone vibrated with another notification - a request to video call. Sighing, you declined the request, only for it to pop up again.
"Why do you keep declining?"
"Because I don't want to see your ugly face."
"Wow, what an insult. I'd pretend to be hurt, but I'm not a toddler."
"Debatable."
He was stubborn, you'd give him that. When the notification popped up again, you scowled and begrudgingly accepted it, his face appearing on the screen. His hair was now dark red, the colour contrasting nicely with his skin, collarbones peeking out as you noticed that he wasn't wearing a shirt, a silver chain visible.
"You coming over or what?" he drawled.
"Put on a shirt and no, I'm not. Stop asking and leave me alone to eat my chocolate in peace."
"You mean the chocolate that you stole from me."
"It was mine from the start," you argued. "You were just being a dick by taking the bag because it was the last one."
"And I got my payback with the yogurt that day. We're even."
Jeno shot you a lazy grin as you plopped another chocolate into your mouth, bringing a hand up to flip him off. It was quiet for a moment as he looked away from the screen, shoulders and back visible as his head moved out of the frame. When he appeared, he had slipped on his glasses again.
"Four eyes."
"Fuck off. I can't see."
He ran a hand through his hair, fixing his bangs as you ate another chocolate.
"What's with the new hair again?"
He sighed. "Jaemin lost another bet. He's got pink hair now, but it actually suits him. The red isn't so bad either, I like it."
"It looks good," you quietly mumbled.
"What?"
"Nothing. I said you look like a fucking acorn."
"Bitch."
"Dick."
"Are we naming things we don't get?"
You promptly hung up on him.
Not a second later, there was a new text from him.
Benchwarmer (9:03 PM): i'll keep the red for u, i think u like it more than the blue ;)
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The rustle of a paper appearing in front of your laptop screen made you look up. It was last week’s assignment, but instead of being covered in red pen marks, there was a note scribbled onto it.
Nice work on this, it’ll bump your grade up to a passing one :)
“Not bad, eh?”
The now-red-haired jock grinned at you as you took the paper from his hands and skimmed through it. He had messaged you the previous week that he was going to try submitting it without any critique from you, to which you had argued and stated that it was better if you looked it over at least. As usual, Jeno had been stubborn and denied, but it seemed like he had been in luck this time. It seemed like your tutoring was helping him somewhat, if that passing grade was enough proof.
Sitting in the chair across from you, he gave you a grin as he crossed his arms. “Told you that I could do it. You just had to trust me.”
“I mean, based on what I’m reading, it’s not that bad actually,” you commented. “It seems like you actually put in some effort into writing this.”
He gasped mockingly. “Me? Not putting effort into things? That hurts.”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. I’m pretty sure that you were literally failing before Mira handed your sorry ass over to me to save you from the depths of academic probation.”
“Yeah, yeah, take all the credit.”
Passing the paper back to him, you turned your attention back to the screen. This week’s struggle? Figuring out user interactions for a stupid paper on resources that you had to write for your information architecture class. It was definitely the most boring thing you had forced yourself to do, putting it at the bottom of your list of things to do in order to get it off your mind. Usually, the words flowed easily when writing essays, but this time, nothing seemed to want to get written as you searched through the textbook for something, anything, that might trigger an idea.
“You should take a break, you know,” Jeno said, watching the way that you mindlessly flipped through the pages. “All that studying isn’t good for you.”
You snorted. “What, and you know better? I’m pretty sure you don’t study, period.”
“Not true,” he said. “I looked over some notes for my econ class the other day.”
“Because you had a test that you had entirely forgotten about.”
“I didn’t forget, okay? I had a tournament that weekend and when you’re out travelling with the team, you’d be an idiot to try to get any work done. Have you tried being roommates with Donghyuck? He doesn’t fucking shut up.”
“Speaking of hockey,” you said, closing the textbook out of boredom and leaning back into your seat. “Rumour has it that there’s an all-star game this weekend.”
Jeno’s eyes brightened at the mention of the match. “Yeah, we’ve got some graduates that formed a team and are planning to come back to verse us. It’s practically the biggest match of the season, if you exclude the league championships and nationals. Coach says that I’ll be playing, but he also plans to let some of the rookies get time on the ice, so it’ll probably be me playing for half and then sitting for half.”
You hummed in response. You knew nothing about hockey other than the idea was to shoot a puck into the enemy’s net and it was played on ice. In fact, you didn’t know much about sports in general, your childhood spent filling up sketchbooks in your spare time. You were pretty sure that you had never gone skating before and most likely never would unless there was a reason for it.
“You should come watch the game,” Jeno said.
“I don’t do sports,” you replied.
“Doesn’t matter. Give yourself some time away from your work. It won’t grow a pair of legs and run off into a fire if you don’t look at it every five seconds.”
“Jeno, I literally know nothing about hockey,” you sighed. “The last thing I want to do is sit there and watch you idiots slam each other into the sideboards until one of you breaks your neck or throws a hissy fit on the ice.”
“I’ll buy you chocolate if you do.”
“Tempting offer, but no. I already have enough in my stash at home and I’m not letting you anywhere near it.”
“Food hoarder.”
“Shut up, acorn.”
“Acorn?” he said, letting out a chuckle. “That’s a new one.”
You shrugged. “What can I say, I’m just too good at making up nicknames.”
Jeno lifted a hand to smooth down his hair. “Speaking of nicknames, when are you going to stop calling me by my last name? You sound like a drill sergeant.”
“When you stop being a dick,” you replied, giving him a sarcastic smile.
“Hate to break it to you, but I was never a dick to start with. I do, however, have a di-“
“I really don’t need to know, thanks.”
At this rate, your essay was never going to get finished, so you closed your laptop with a sigh and packed it away in your bag, textbook following suite. Standing up, you turned to wait for Jeno, who had noticed you leaving and was already at your side. Okay, maybe spending time around him wasn’t all that bad. You would be lying if you said that you had forgiven him for everything, but it was nice to be talking to someone that wasn’t Mira or your family. The thing about Jeno was that you knew him even before high school, seeing him grow up throughout elementary school and being in the same homeroom classes together. In light of his change to a fuckboy attitude, you had forgotten what he used to be like – a smiling, good-natured kid with a love for his cats. Looking at him now, you could still see the remnants of that easy-going boy, the one who would invite you over to play with him and the other children when you had first moved, knowing no one.
Maybe you secretly had feelings for him after all this time. Wait, hold up. Feelings for Lee Jeno? Nope, not going down that route, brain. Nice try. Your attitude towards him had changed slightly, now that you thought about it. Had he become something like a friend? Or were you just so out of touch with the people around you that he had become your primary source of social interaction?
“You good over there?”
His voice brought you out of your thoughts, already having walked towards the doors that led out of the library. He was wearing his glasses more often, you noticed, and instead of ditching you after the elevator ride down to the main floor of the common building, he now walked with you all the way to the bus stop. You pretended not to see the way that he would check the time on his phone, breaking out into a jog after he bid you goodbye and thought you weren’t watching, knowing that the athletics building was all the way on the other side of the campus.
“I-yeah, I’m fine,” you said, catching up to him.
“You sure?” he questioned.
“Sorry, was just thinking.”
“About what?”
About you.
“About that hockey match,” you answered. “Maybe I’ll find time to watch a bit of it or something.”
Jeno’s eyes lit up as he looked at you, a hopeful expression on his face. “Yeah? You think you’ll come to it?”
“It’s not really my scene, but if I keep denying every time, you’re never going to stop pestering me about it, so I might as well just go once.”
“You’ll love it,” he said, grinning widely. “As long as you keep watching number 23, you’ll be fine.”
“Isn’t that your number?”
“Exactly.”
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The arena was fairly full when you walked in, the sound of cheering filling the air. Jeno had been sending you reminders every hour that the match was at seven, to which you had responded with either ‘I know, you’ve told me this already’ or straight up with a middle finger emoji. When he had shown up for the tutoring session earlier in the week, you had curiously watched as he had pulled out a jersey from his bag. Motioning for you to stand up, you had obeyed, raising an eyebrow as he had placed the jersey flush against your chest, his eyes narrowed as he had looked you up and down.
“It’s a little big, but it should fit,” he had said, pushing the fabric into your hands.
“What’s this for?” you had questioned.
He had given you an incredulous look. “For the match, of course. If you’re going to watch, then you better do it in style.”
“This jersey has your name on it.”
“Correct.”
“You want me to wear your jersey? Isn’t that reserved for like, I don’t know, the girlfriends of the team or whatever?”
“Are you saying that you’re my girlfriend?”
Gaping at him, you had felt your face go warm at his question. “W-what? No, that’s not what I said. Besides, I’ll look like a midget in this thing. Why is so fucking big?”
“That’s what sh-“
“No,” you had interrupted, pointing a finger at the smirk forming on his face. “Don’t even start with that.”
He had grinned. “Just wear the damn jersey, alright? It’s not that big of a deal and if you really hate it, cover it up with a jacket or something.”
After a moment, you had agreed. “Fine, but I’m washing it before I put it on because you fucking stink.”
And now here you were, wearing Jeno’s freshly washed jersey, looking for an empty seat in the stands. Seeing one towards the back, you wove through the gathered crowds of people until you reached the stairs, walking up to the back row and sitting down. From across the arena, you could see the team huddled together, gear on and laces tightened as they were engaged in what seemed like a last minute pep talk before the start of the match. On the other side were the seniors, having come back for this match specifically. There was shouting and hollering as the school’s mascot began waving around excitedly, getting the crowds energized as the players began making their way onto the ice.
Your eyes were on Jeno’s figure as he gracefully skated over to the where the rest of the players had lined up. Just before getting into position, you saw him lift his head and look around the crowd, eyes searching until they found you. Raising your hand, you formed it into a fist and placed it right above your heart, directly onto your chest. Seeing the action, he reciprocated it and pointed at you, a smile forming on your face without realizing.
“See, if you make a fist and place it above your heart, it means good luck. My dad and I used to do it right before matches, kind of like a handshake across the ice.”
“Like this?”
“Yeah, exactly. If you do that on game day, I’ll know it’s you.”
There was a hushed silence that fell over the arena, the tension between the two teams heavy as the referee skated forward with the puck in hand. His lips were moving, but you were too far away to hear what he had to say as he bent down, placing it on the ice and raising the whistle to his mouth.
The roar of the crowd was instantaneous as chaos broke out on the ice. The sound of skates and hockey sticks scraping filled the air as the two teams launched into a heated match, shouts from the players muffled over the sound of the people watching. The speed at which they moved fascinated you, the control they had on such finicky and thin blades, the movement of their bodies as they sped after the puck, an endless game of cat and mouse. Jeno’s figure was graceful across the ice, the number 23 and the name ‘LEE’ clearly visible from your seat. Shit, he was actually pretty good. No wonder he was the ace of the team. Within a couple of minutes, you saw him break away from the rest of the players, puck dancing around his stick as he lined up for a shot, the sound of the buzzer echoing loudly in the arena as it sailed past the goalie and into the net, the crowd cheering as the scoreboard changed in favour of the home team.
The match continued with the same intensity throughout the first half, the clock slowly counting down to the final minutes before both teams would switch players and let their second lineups take their place. It was tied 3-3, however you could tell that the all-stars were most likely going to get in one last goal before the halfway point. Even though you weren’t a fan of hockey, you couldn’t deny that the energy of the crowd and the excitement had you invested in the match, cheering the team on as your eyes stayed glued to Jeno. The way he moved was effortless, from every step he took to the way that he held his stick, a confidence in him that you knew came from his love of the sport.
Until that confidence backfired.
It was like time slowed down, your eyes moving from his speeding form to look at the player coming towards him from the left. You watched as he pulled his stick back, lining up for a shot, and suddenly, he was slammed into the boards, bodychecked from the side as his body went crashing against the glass, falling limp against the ice. Immediately, the crowd went silent, quiet murmurings filling the arena as everyone stood up to see what had happened. You were frozen to your seat, hand covering your mouth as you waited for him to move.
The last thing I want to do is sit there and watch you idiots slam each other into the sideboards until one of you breaks your neck or throws a hissy fit on the ice.
Your own words to him rang in your ears as you watched, coaches and medics alike making their way onto the ice to his unmoving figure, the referee motioning for the players to give him space. Come on, you thought. Move, get up.
But he lay still.
Laying out a stretcher, you watched as his body was shifted onto it, carried away as one of the coaches motioned for another player to take his spot. Once the ice had been cleared, the referee blew the whistle and the match continued. The sound of the crowd picked up once more, but you heard nothing as the blood pumped in your ears, the sight of Jeno being slammed into the boards replaying in your mind. Standing up, you made your way down to the ground floor and pushed past the doors, searching for the men’s locker room. You knew that you wouldn’t be allowed in, so you leaned against the wall just beside the door and listened.
“… concussed for sure. Just by that alone, he’s out for a least a couple of weeks.”
“His breathing is fine, but he’ll be in a lot of pain when he wakes up. What about his arm?”
“Dislocated, most likely up in the shoulder. I can set it straight, but it’ll hurt like a bitch. It’s better if I do it now rather than later.”
There was some shuffling, then the sound of someone counting down. A pained yell was heard, making you wince at the sound, followed by footsteps as whoever was in the room moved around. The door suddenly opened and you jumped back, coming face to face with Johnny Suh, who you recognized to be the head coach.
“Can I help you?” he asked, eyes suspicious.
“I’m, uh, a friend of Jeno’s,” you said quickly. “Is he going to be alright?”
The man nodded in understanding. “I see. He’s currently in and out of consciousness, so we’re giving him some time to come to. Got a dislocated shoulder that we just set, not sure if you heard all of that, but he’ll be benched for a while until he fully recovers.”
He sighed before continuing. “It’s probably my fault. I didn’t know that Nakamoto had gotten so aggressive with his checking style. Must’ve been something they worked on when he went pro. If I had known, I would’ve warned them to keep an eye out for him.”
You stood there awkwardly as the coach pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly distraught by his star player’s injury. There wasn’t much you could do other than place a hand gently against his arm, giving him a sympathetic look.
“Are you close to Jeno?” he suddenly asked.
“It’s somewhat complicated,” you answered. “But I did grow up with him, if that helps.”
“Would you be willing to check up on him after he gets the all-clear to go home? I’m sure that his teammates will be concerned, but I’ll feel better knowing that someone he trusts is there with him.”
You nodded, not wanting to deny the coach after seeing how upset he was.
“Thank you,” he said. “I’ll get Jeno to send you a message once he’s home safely. Oh, and one more thing. Don’t let him get too into his head about this whole thing. He’s a competitive player, but hates making mistakes and can’t get his mind back on track when he overthinks.”
“Sure thing, Coach.”
The man nodded once more to you and walked away, presumably to get back to the match, leaving you standing alone in the hallway.
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Ding.
You reached for your phone, opening the notification that had appeared.
Benchwarmer (9:29 PM): i feel like shit
You (10:29 PM): No kidding, you got obliterated out there.
Benchwarmer (9:29 PM): thx that helps so much :(
Benchwarmer (9:30 PM): coach said something bout u taking care of me??
You (9:30 PM): He said to check up on you, make sure that you were okay and not dying.
You (9:31 PM): Are you dying?
Benchwarmer (9:32 PM): yes
You (9:32 PM): Good, then suffer.
Benchwarmer (9:32 PM): rude
Benchwarmer (9:33 PM): no rly, can u come over and help for a bit
Benchwarmer (9:33 PM): i feel like I might vomit from the lights
You (9:34 PM): I’ll be over in less than 20, hang in there.
Tucking your phone in your pocket, you went into the bathroom to grab a bottle of painkillers, as well as a first aid kit in case he didn’t have one. Placing both in your bag, you reached for your jacket and keys, slipping your shoes on as you made your way out of your apartment.
You were lucky that Jeno didn’t live too far from you. The bus ride to the campus took about half an hour and he had his own car, so it took him even less time to get there. He had surprised you one day by getting on the bus with you, making you raise an eyebrow at his presence. Apparently, his car had been in the auto shop and he had taken the bus in the morning, so you didn’t question it and made room for him to sit beside you. If you walked quickly, which you did anyways, it would only take you about fifteen minutes to get his place. Walking alone at night was never a good idea, but you knew that the route you took was illuminated and all would be alright.
The jock lived in one of the townhouses that made up a fairly decent neighbourhood. He had told you that he shared the place with two other guys who were also on the hockey team, but there was plenty of room for all three. Walking up the steps, you knocked on the door, hearing the muffled sound of footsteps as it swung open, revealing who you assumed to be Jaemin in a white tee and sweatpants, his pink hair a reminder of his unlucky losing streak.
“Oh, hey! Wasn’t expecting any visitors tonight,” he said, opening the door wider for you to come in.
“Yeah, I wasn’t planning on hauling my ass over here either, but Coach Suh asked me to check up on his star players and I’m apparently needed,” you explained. “Sorry to barge in so late, I know it’s not an ideal time.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Jaemin said with a smile. “I just got home anyways, so I didn’t even know that Jeno was injured until I walked into his room.”
You frowned. “Aren’t you on the team though?”
“I didn’t play tonight. I’m on a bit of a break right now due to an old waist injury flaring up again, so I was allowed to skip,” he said, taking your jacket from your hands and hanging it up. “I might not be on the ice, but I’m definitely getting more work done.”
“Are you studying business like Jeno?”
“Photography and media, actually. I’m one of the few that didn’t pick an easy major.”
Nodding, you let him lead you to Jeno’s room. For three guys, specifically hockey players, the main space was fairly organized. The only clutter visible was a can or two of alcohol on the coffee table – as to be expected. When you arrived at the door, he knocked and a quiet “come in” was heard.
“Good luck with him,” Jaemin whispered, patting you on the shoulder and walking away, leaving you at the mercy of his housemate.
“About time you showed up,” Jeno grumbled. “Also, can you shut off the lights? It’s killing my head.”
Flipping the switch, the room was doused in darkness as he turned on his side lamp, softly illuminating the guitar in the corner beside his bed. His right arm was bandaged up and wrapping in a sling, a bruise on his cheekbone visible as he attempted a weak smile, forcing himself into a sitting position, leaning against the headboard with his phone in his lap.
“Damn, you look like shit,” you commented, earning yourself a glare from him.
“Thanks, Sherlock. I fucking know.”
You walked over to his bed, sitting down as you propped yourself up with an arm. “How do you feel?”
“Like someone took a frying pan and slammed it onto my head,” he said, closing his eyes. “Coach said that I’m out for at least a month and a half, so no hockey for me until then.”
“Have you taken any painkillers for your head?” you asked. “I brought some just in case if you happened to run out.”
“Took some right after I messaged you. They should’ve kicked in by now, but I don’t feel anything yet.”
He was quiet as you leaned forward to brush the hair out of his face, turning his head gently to examine the blossoming bruise on his cheek. Your hands were cold compared to his warm skin and he leaned into your touch silently, eyes still closed. You let him rest there until he spoke up again.
“I like you.”
Your brain seemed to take an awfully long time to process what he had just said as you sat there, unmoving and watching him. He seemed to sense it, opening his eyes to look at you, his gaze fixed upon yours intently.
“I said, I like you,” he repeated, his good arm reaching forward to grasp onto your wrist and pull your hand against his chest, feeling his beating heart, hand warm against yours. You were at a loss for words, gaping at him until it finally kicked in that he was waiting for you to say something.
“Why?”
He stared at you. “You gave me a chance after everything I did to you in high school. You could’ve easily said no to Mira and gone on with your life, but you didn’t. You agreed when Coach asked you to check up on me. You even walked all the way over here in the dark, just to see me.”
Letting go of your hand, Jeno cupped your cheek, pulling you closer to him. His eyes briefly dipped down, then back up at you.
“Don’t you like me, too?” he murmured quietly.
Don’t you like me, too?
Your only response was to press your lips carefully against his, pulling back after a moment as you gauged his reaction. Running his thumb gently across your cheek, he pulled you back in, lips molding with yours as you let yourself be consumed by the force that was Lee Jeno. The way that his mouth fit against yours sent a small shiver down your spine, not going unnoticed by him as he deepened the kiss, making you gasp as he took the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. Hand moving away from your face, he trailed it down your side until it rested on your lower back, tugging your body forward.
“So you do know how to kiss,” he said against your lips, letting you maneuver your body until you were straddling his thigh.
“Were you curious?” you asked teasingly.
“Maybe, maybe not.”
You pinched his side at the response, making him squirm away as he reached for your wrist, holding your arm in place as he kissed you once more. There was no need for explanations at this moment, no need to decide whether this meant something more. It was just you and him, years of built-up tension being released in something as simple as human touch. His lips moved to kiss your jaw, then down to your neck as you titled your head to the side, closing your eyes at the feeling of his mouth against your skin.
“We don’t have to do anything right now,” you said quietly. Jeno paid you no attention as he focused on sucking a bruise into your skin, tongue lapping gently at the spot as you sighed in contentment.
“But I want to,” he said, pulling away to look at you, eyes filled with something you recognized to be lust.
“You’re injured,” you reminded him.
“I still have a good hand.”
He moved the one that wasn’t in a sling down to the back of your ass, kneading against the fabric of your pants and simultaneously pushing you down against his thigh as you let out a hum of satisfaction, his eyes greedily taking in your reactions as you moved your hips gently under his guidance. The friction was there, but not quite enough as you felt his fingers tug against the waistband, a silent plea. Managing to slip them off, you felt exposed under his stare as his hand wandered over your skin, gently rubbing circles into it as your brain worked to calm you down.
“Nervous?” he asked. “You’re tense.”
“I’ve haven’t done this in a while,” you confessed, already preparing for his judging commentary at your lack of a sex life.
Jeno shrugged. “That’s fine.”
You narrowed your eyes. “You’re not going to make fun of me for that?”
“Not everyone has a fuck buddy they can call on in the middle of the night. Besides,” he smirked, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “I feel special being your first in a while.”
“Of course, you do,” you said, rolling your eyes. His hand tightened against your thigh – a warning.
“Don’t get an attitude with me,” he threatened. “I’d fuck you right through this bed if I wasn’t injured.”
“You’d last a minute tops.”
“You talk a lot of shit for someone who hasn’t gotten dick in a while.”
Feeling his fingers slip under the waistband of your panties, you let out a quiet moan as he ran a finger against your slit, smirk widening as he felt just how wet you were becoming at the thought of him. Pushing a finger into your cunt, you closed your eyes at the feeling of bliss, at the way that he curled the digit in just the right spot, stroking against your inner walls teasingly.
“Can you do two?” he asked, but before you could answer, he was already working a second finger in, your hand slapping across your mouth quickly as you let out a moan. Fuck, it really had been a while since you had done anything and he could clearly tell, your walls tight around his fingers. He continued to move them in and out, placing his thumb against your clit and rubbing gently as you felt the pressure build in the pit of your stomach.
“Feel good?”
“F-fuck, yes,” you gasped out, a spike of pleasure shooting through your body as he suddenly pressed hard against your clit, curling his fingers at the same time. Jeno’s eyes were dark, hungrily watching the way that you reacted to his actions, feeling the way that your walls were beginning to spasm around his fingers. The orgasm was just out of reach, just a little more… and suddenly, there was nothing.
You whined as he slipped his fingers out, pushing them past your lips to quiet your noises, forcing you to taste yourself as he watched.
“Good girl,” he murmured, voice low as you swirled your tongue around his fingers, the praise making a small hint of pride blossom in your chest. He shifted the thigh that you were straddling, pressing against your still-sensitive core after being denied an orgasm.
“Ride it,” he instructed, removing his fingers from your mouth and placing his hand against your lower back, pushing your hips down to grind against the hardened muscle. You moaned at the feeling, the friction delicious as you moved your core against his thigh. His hand was strong against your back, helping you move as he tensed his leg in time with the rolling of your hips.
“Jeno-“
“That’s right, baby,” he cooed. “Get yourself off.”
No sooner did you feel the tell-tale build-up of your orgasm once more, the tightening of your walls indicating that you would soon reach that peak you were denied earlier. Chasing that feeling, you moved against his thigh, head bent down as you closed your eyes, your hands tightening into fists against his chest. Jeno moved his hand away from your back to grab your chin, crashing his lips against yours to swallow your cries as you came on his thigh, gasping into his mouth as the pleasure coursed through your body, making your head slightly fuzzy as you rode it out. As you came down from your high, your hand shifted to accidentally brush against his bulge, eliciting a small groan from Jeno.
“Don’t worry about me,” he said, as if hearing your unasked question. “I’ll be fine.”
“I insist.“
"No, really. I'm fine."
"Jeno."
His breath stuttered slightly as you placed a hand on his bulge again, your tone of voice warning him that this wasn't something to argue about. Unlacing the strings on his shorts, you pulled them down, his cock already straining against his boxers as he bit his lip, eyes trained on the way that your hand dipped under and wrapped around the base of his length, freeing it. The tip was tinted red, the vein on the underside pulsing as you felt him twitch. Placing a thumb against the tip, you spread the precum along the length of his cock, stroking him slowly as he closed his eyes.
"You're a fucking tease," he growled.
"Hey," you complained. "I can't even remember the last time I touched a dick, so don't blame me for taking my time."
"Well, if you take too damn long, I might just strangle you with it, so hurry the fuck up."
Huffing at his impatience, you placed a hand towards the base and wrapped your lips around the tip, tongue swirling around the head as Jeno's hand immediately flew to your hair, fingers stroking the strands back until he had a decent ponytail to grip onto. You loosened your jaw as much as you could in hopes of taking him further down your throat, but your gag reflex threatened to kick in as you felt the tears start to brim in your eyes. Instead, you settled for pumping him and sucking, looking up occasionally to see his hooded gaze staring you down, entranced by the way your mouth worked on him.
Sliding a hand down to gently cup his balls, you felt his body spasm, a sudden moan coming out of his mouth as you hummed against his length, the vibrations forcing him to pull against your hair. You could feel him starting to tense up, his cock pulsing against your tongue as you continued your ministrations.
"Oh, fuck, fuck," he swore. "Get off."
Humming in disagreement, you moved up to his tip, tongue flitting into the slit. Jeno swore once more, then pushed your head down as he came in your mouth. You forced yourself to swallow as much as you could, letting him thrust into your mouth as he came down from his high, the taste of his cum slightly bitter but manageable. Wiping away the remnants that still lingered on your lips, you let him bring you in for a kiss, an urgency to the action.
“It’s getting late. You should stay the night,” Jeno said in between kisses. “I don’t want you walking back home by yourself.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude when you’re injured,” you asked.
“Just stay, please?”
Jeno shifted his body to the side to make room as you slid off his thigh, wincing slightly at the pain. You reached for the blanket at the base of the bed, spreading it out and throwing it over both of your bodies as you rested your head against his chest, his good arm wrapping around your waist. His body was warm, gently rising and falling as his breathing slowed down. Never did you think that you would find yourself in the same bed as him, your hatred for him dwindling down as you spent more time around him.
“Hey, Jeno?”
“Yeah?’ he murmured sleepily.
“I think I like you, too.”
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“Someone’s up early.”
You jumped at the sound of Jaemin’s voice, looking over to where he had peeked his head out of the kitchen. It was still fairly early in the morning and you had woken up before Jeno, quietly slipping out of his bed as you had gotten dressed and left him sleeping in his room. It wasn’t that you were running away – you just had things to do and it was better if you let him rest.
“I didn’t want to intrude, but he asked me to stay the night,” you explained.
“Oh, I heard, don’t worry.”
Your face was warm at his words. “Thin walls?”
“Just a little. I had headphones on for most of the time, so don’t be embarrassed. It happens,” he said, chuckling at your expression. “You sure you don’t want to stay for breakfast?”
You shook your head. “Thanks, but I need to get back. If Jeno happens to wake up, tell him that he needs to take it easy. He’ll most likely be benched for a while, so the less he strains his body, the better.”
“Will do,” he answered. “Safe walk home.”
“Thanks.”
When you got back to your apartment, you made a beeline for the bathroom, stripping off your clothes and hopping into the shower. The water was warm against your back as your mind thought back to the events of the previous night.
I like you.
God, did you really just confess your feelings to Jeno? You were never meant to let him become a part of your life like this. He was supposed to be one of those people that came and went, not lingering long enough to make an impression on you. Yet, here you were, allowing him to awaken emotions in you that you had pushed away to the back of your mind, too focused on your academics to care about a relationship. What were you two anyways? A thing? Friends with benefits, minus the benefits part? You didn’t know.
Spending the rest of the day tending to your own tasks, you put the jock out of your mind as you flitted around your apartment. It wasn’t until the afternoon that you finally checked your phone, seeing multiple missed messages from Jeno and two from an unknown number.
Benchwarmer (10:04 AM): u weren’t here when i woke up :(
Benchwarmer (10:09 AM): jaemin told me that u went home, hope the walk back was ok
Benchwarmer (11:39 AM): ugh my shoulder hurts so bad fuck
Benchwarmer (1:20 PM): u ok??
Benchwarmer (1:21 PM): ur not answering my texts
Benchwarmer (1:56 PM): ur probably busy so i'll stop bothering u, good luck with ur work :)
You (5:48 PM): Hey, sorry. I’ve been busy all day, haven’t been checking my phone.
You (5:48 PM): How are you feeling now?
As you waited for his reply, you checked the messages from the unknown number.
Unknown Contact (5:30 PM): You know that Jeno’s lying to you, right?
Unknown Contact (5:30 PM): None of what he’s saying is true
Frowning, you sent a message back.
You (5:49 PM): Sorry, but I don’t have this number saved. Who is this?
The response came after a few minutes.
Unknown Contact (5:54 PM): It was a dare from the seniors on the hockey team
Unknown Contact (5:54 PM): If he could get you to fall for him and get you in his bed, he would win
Unknown Contact (5:55 PM): Did you really think he cared about you? You know what he’s really like
Your heart dropped at the final message. It was suspicious, getting all of this information from a stranger, but if they knew about what was going on with the hockey team, it was most likely someone who was on it. You couldn’t shake the feeling of worry, the thought that maybe whoever was telling you all of this was telling the truth.
Ding.
Benchwarmer (5:57 PM): still feeling like shit
Benchwarmer (5:58 PM): i miss u tho
No, this had to be some sort of joke. You knew that Jeno could be an asshole, but he had shown you a side of him that you had never allowed yourself to see. He couldn’t be lying, not after he had made that promise.
Right?
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© AMORAJAE 2021. All Rights Reserved.
2K notes · View notes
neopuppy · 2 months ago
Text
All Night Long (M)
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Preview: “He’s actually about to start opening packages! You should see how many omega’s actually do send him their filthy slicked up underwear.” You adjust the screen so Jaemin can have a better view.
“You can’t be serious right now..” Jaemin looks around with shifty eyes. “Have..you done..that?”
“No! Gross! I would never! Look- I might be lame, and desperate, and..weird sometimes but I’m not that weird. Besides, it’s too embarrassing..what if he got a whiff of my scent and looked disgusted.” You finish with a frown. Jaemin sighs shaking his head.
“Embarrassing? And this..” he reaches forward, picking up a vile hanging from your lamp. “This Jeno’s Juice isn’t?!? YOU HAVE IT HANGING WHERE EVERYONE CAN SEE!”
“Hey!!” You yank the vile from his hands, clutching it to your chest. “I paid good money for this!”
“Oh believe me! I’ll never forget the day you dropped $100 on gamer boy bath water.”
Pairing: Alpha JenoxFemale Omega Reader
Word Count: 5k(this..was supposed to be a drabble)
Genre: one shot, AU, smut, a/b/o, kinda crack, gamer/camboy Jeno, roommate Jaemin(JUST friends)
Warnings: explicit language, smut, PWP(plot if you squint), alcohol/drug mentioned once.
Smut Warning: knot kink, breeding kink, praise kink, too much slick, that good a/b/o stuff.
a/n: Thank You for 1000+ followers! Enjoy
“This guys so shameless, streaming shirtless playing Minecraft?” Jaemin shoves his glasses up grimacing at your computer screen seated next to you.
“You’re just jealous no one pays to watch you do mundane things without a shirt on.” You adjust your elbow against your desk, smiling watching the man on screen lift a brow at you. At least that’s what you tell yourself.
“You don’t even play Minecraft, do you really care what he’s doing?” Jaemin rolls his eyes, in disbelief by the amount of viewers joining the stream.
“Hey if you’re gonna be judging, just get out! You’re ruining my most relaxing time of the day!” You shove at him, keeping your eyes trained on the screen lighting up your dark room.
“If I was an alpha, you’d be paying to watch me..” Jaemin scoffs. “Alphas have it so easy, they just exists and you omegas throw your panties at them begging to be used.”
“He’s actually about to start opening packages! You should see how many omega’s actually do send him their filthy slicked up underwear.” you adjust the screen so Jaemin can have a better view.
“You can’t be serious right now..” Jaemin looks around with shifty eyes. “Have..you done..that?”
“No! Gross! I would never! Look- I might be lame, and desperate, and..weird sometimes but I’m not that weird. Besides, it’s too embarrassing..what if he got a whiff of my scent and looked disgusted.” You finish with a frown. Jaemin sighs shaking his head.
“Embarrassing? And this..” he reaches forward, picking up a vile hanging from your lamp. “This Jeno’s Juice isn’t?!? YOU HAVE IT HANGING WHERE EVERYONE CAN SEE!”
“Hey!!” You yank the vile from his hands, clutching it to your chest. “I paid good money for this!”
“Oh believe me! I’ll never forget the day you dropped $100 on gamer boy bath water.” Jaemin frowns throughly disgusted. “You lived off nothing but ramen that month. If only FAFSA knew you were spending your checks to fund some alpha profiting off your sexual deprivation.”
“You’re such a jealous nerd, ugh. Betas!” you laugh, returning the vile to hang. “Sometimes he plays Animal Crossing you know? It’s really cute, he knows all of K.K. Sliders best hits. Also! Dont forget..” you open up you desk drawer open, pulling out a small glittery decorated binder. “First 100 orders also came with limited edition photo cards!” You turn to the page displaying photos of the alpha waist up in a bathtub. “He’s unbelievable!”
“We need to get out more.” Jaemin furrows his brows with concern watching you beam passing through the stacked pages of photos. “Both of us, we’re in our prime! Not getting laid!”
“I don’t wanna get laid, I mean we used to do it and..”
“Hey hey, no need to remind me that I don’t sexually arouse you. It’s not my fault you’re obsessed with alpha knots. You don’t necessarily do it for me either, but I am a man with needs after all.” He shrugs, continuing to watch the alpha laugh on the screen. He’s reading the absurd comments coming in the streams chat room. “Surprised you’re not typing out poems of adoration and love right now.”
“Pft, you know I’m subscribed to his only fans. I send him messages everyday.” You pull open your phone, scrolling through the read love sonnets you leave the alpha daily.
“You’re kinda pitiful” Jaemin sighs again. “But love you bestie. I should go study for my test tomorrow now. As interesting as this was and all.” He gets up, waving goodbye. “Try not to get slick all over the floors again. See you in the morning.”
You return your focus back to the alpha’s stream. Leaning back into your chair with a content smile. He was perfect, funny, handsome, witty, and so so sexy. Who needed the real thing, when Jeno was right out of your dreams.
“Are my cute omegas having fun tonight? Alphas and betas too of course, I see you” Jeno smiles brightly, the sounds of coins chiming in growing louder.
“Ah yea, I have a lot of packages to go through. I’ll just open a few tonight. I’m sorry I won’t be streaming tomorrow night. It’s going to be a long day moving into my new place.” Jeno explains while cutting open a package. His nose immediately scrunches up, forcing a smile on his lips. Jeno pulls out a red lacy bra from the envelope.
“Ooh.. not quite my size is it?” He laughs holding it against his chest. “Yes, I probably could open up my own lingerie store at this point.” Jeno reads through the chat, pushing the bra off camera.
“How often do I pop a knot? You cuties never get tired of asking that do you?” He reads with a brow wiggle, biting on his lip. “Like I told you all last week, I’m single at the moment. The only knots I’m popping are into the palm of my hand.”
Jenoknotmyazz- There’s NO WAY he’s single, but whatever! Feed my fantasy alpha🤤
Alphadiqq666- He better lie to me, 80% of my pay checks go straight into his bank account!!
JenosNippleLickr- PULL OUT YOUR COCK ALPHA!!
You sigh rolling your eyes scanning the chat. Jeno most likely wasn’t going to read half of these anyway.
‘You look really sexy with your hair pushed back like that alpha. Don’t overwork yourself tomorrow moving! Get a lot of rest tonight!💓’ you type out hitting send.
“Oh..” Jeno’s eyes light up, crinkling around the corners. “You like my hair like this kn0tluvr?” He smiles wider reading out your user name, flicking at the strands of hair styled in front of his forehead. Your cheeks heat up immediately, butterflies exploding in your stomach.
JenosNippleLickr- Ugh what a simp! Show us cock!!!
Eatmyaxx69- seriously what the hell?? does he ever get full nude?!? this is boring!!
‘It looks really good on you alpha! But you really pull off anything😚’ you finish typing out, hands trembling. Only just realizing how embarrassing your username sounds. Jeno continues reading through the chat, smile widening.
“Alright my babies..” The alpha leans back stretching out his arms. Biceps flexing, coins in the chat room going crazy. “It’s time I sign off and catch some Z’s” he bites down on his lip rubbing over his abs. “Of course I haven’t forgotten about your goodnight kiss. You think I’d leave you all hanging like that?” Jeno smirks leaning in, pursing his lips out with a smacking sound.
“Get some rest, remember to dream of me.” He winks, waving off as the stream ends. You let out a sad sigh, feeling the familiar emptiness return.
“I’ll go leave him a message..” you nod, opening up the alphas website, sending him many thanks and praises before going to bed.
————————————————————
“Listen, hear me out. I thought about it, I really think it would be a good idea.” Jaemin sips at his black coffee across from you.
“How is that possibly a good idea?!? That’s mortifying!” You look at him like he’s crazy, which he obviously is.
“How?? You literally pay this alpha every month! What’s the harm in sending him..” he looks around shrugging. “A shirt? I don’t know, something that’s coated in your scent. Doesn’t have to be underwear!”
“Jaemin I can’t do that. I see the way he reacts when he’s opening packages! I can tell he doesn’t like it..” you shake your head, motioning absolutely not with your hands.
“I’m saying this as your friend, you need to get laid. At least go out with me Friday, there are so many alphas out there! Instead you choose to waste your time with this....basically artificial intelligence one that you can’t even touch.” Jaemin frowns with concern. This isn’t the first time he’s lectured you about this, wouldn’t be the last surely either.
“Don’t call him that, it’s not his fault I have ptsd after that last alpha I was with. If anything, he’s helping me learn to trust them again.”
“You have to do this for me. I hate seeing you waste your days away masturbating to some alpha playing video games” he finishes with a sigh.
“Hey! What I do in the privacy of my bedroom is none of your business.” You cross your arms over your chest annoyed. Who is he- or anyone, to tell you what you can and can’t get off to.
“Send him something.” Jaemin gives you a stern look, tugging at your pajama shirt.
“If I do, will you leave me alone about this? You know being single isn’t the worst thing. It’s not like I see you holed up with anyone.” You smack his hand away.
“What kind of roommate would I be rubbing my relationships in your face? I’ll have you know, I’m very popular among the omegas at my job.” Jaemin scoffs rubbing over his hand, as if your slap hurt.
“Sure sure. Look I’ll send him something, and endure the humiliation if it means you’ll get it through your head that I just.. find him comforting and peaceful to watch after a long day.” You sigh leaning against the kitchen island. “He’s so funny, and cute.. he just seem’s so nice too. He never let’s the perverts that are only interested in his body bother him. He’s so respectful toward all the omegas sending him things even if he doesn’t like it..”
“Go on, you’re missing the major factor here.”
“..fine! He’s really attractive! God he’s so sexy I want to burst into tears just looking at him!” You turn fisting Jaemin’s t-shirt. “And I just know! I JUST KNOWWW IT’S BIG!” you whimper dropping your head against his shoulder. “I just know he could break me with his knot, he could end my life with his knot and bring me back. He could fix me!!”
“You’re so weird” Jaemin pats your back. “Nothing’s gonna fix that.”
——————————————————————————-
You chewed over your fingernails nervously, angry at yourself for letting Jaemin convince you to send the alpha you adored watching a piece of your clothing. It was all you could think about after sending out the small package to his PO Box. What if your scent repulsed him? What if he had no reaction at all? Would no reaction be better than some type of reaction? At least if he hated it you could convince yourself you really had no chance.
Who knew how fast it would get to him, you had sent him things before. No need to mention to Jaemin the amount of game stop gift cards and designer clothes you’d picked off Jeno’s wishlist. His mailing address was in the same city as you which always made you nervous. He had moved yesterday missing his normal streaming schedule though. What are the chances you’d ever run into him at the grocery store anyway? The city was big enough to never cross paths.
The black screen lights up as Jeno signs on waving at the camera. He’s in a white muscle tank today, pushing his hair back off his face with a smile.
“Hey cuties, I know you missed me yesterday. Thanks for being patient and waiting for me.” Jeno looks over the chat, quietly laughing. “Why’s my shirt still on? Good question..let’s fix that” he leans back, slowly revealing his defined slim waist and abs. Jeno slides his hand over his stomach, drawing lines across the crevices. The chat exploding with donations and horny omegas.
“Should I start playing? Or would you like me to open some packages first?” Jeno smirks pulling a pile of envelopes and parcels closer on his desk. “I had soooo many waiting at the post office. I really feel so loved right now.” Jeno places a hand over his heart sighing dramatically.
“This one’s decorated so cute...oh! kn0tluvr?? You never send me mail like this!” Jeno beams with excitement wiggling around the shiny black package wrapped in a glittery bow. You nearly jump out of your seat hearing your username out loud yet again. It would be too late to change it at this point.. You lean over your desk inching in closer to the screen.
“Ah it’s almost too pretty to open” Jeno delicately cuts across the top, his smile immediately faltering. Your heart nearly sinks analyzing every movement on his face. “It’s...a shirt?” He gently pulls out your worn out pajama shirt coated in your scent, chest rising and falling taking in deep breaths. He swallows down audibly with a nod. “Thank..y-you..it’s..nice.”
Puppyking00- who the hell sends a nasty old shirt?
Knotmyazzjeno- no seriously, what a loser. Hope he opens mine next, I wore this thong for a week before mailing it!
Your eyes water up watching Jeno hesitate before moving your package off screen to the side. He continues on ripping through another envelope, quickly returning to a normal state of half annoyed pretending to be unbothered.
“He hates me..” you throw yourself back into your seat. “Why did I listen to you Jaemin!” You wipe at your eyes shaking your head. “No, no. I won’t cry over this.” Looking back at Jeno continue on with his widened eyes holding up another set of underwear. With a whiny sigh you minimize the screen, unable to keep watching him.
“It doesn’t mean anything.. he doesn’t know me. He’ll never know me..”
—————————————————————————-
“No offense but...you don’t look so great?” Jaemin lifts a brow eyeballing your distraught appearance. You cried throughout the entirety of the night on and off. Trying to convince yourself you had no real reason to be disappointed.
“Thanks..” you murmur pouring yourself a glass of water.
“Something happen?” Jaemin asks you now feeling concerned.
“Nothing” you lowly reply, hiding your mouth in your cup.
“Shit well...I gotta head out to work. Early shift today.. hey uh, check the mail yea? I’m expecting some stuff.” Jaemin pats your arm on his way out. He throws you a wave goodbye at the door.
“K..” you mumble out to yourself as the door clicks shut. You really needed to get things done today and quit wallowing in your misery. May as well get the mail out of the way. You pull on one of Jaemin’s hoodies and your slippers heading out to the elevator. The mailboxes all located at the main entrance of the building, omega, betas and alphas alike. Despite living on a floor for only omegas and betas, you still passed the the alphas quite often whenever returning home.
“Junk mail...trash..” you murmur to yourself, tossing anything unimportant into a near by garbage. The front entrance door opening and shutting, with other’s always passing through.
“Hi..excuse me?” A deep voice questions near by. You lift your head looking to the side, dropping the pile of mail in your hands. The alphas eyes widen looking at the dropped envelopes.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to frighten you!” He replies holding his hands up. Your mouth falls open, hands shaking in front of you. “Uh.. you.. live here right?” He nervously lifts his arm, scratching at the back of his neck. It’s him, it has to be him.. shirtless and all. Even better, soaked in sweat, beautiful scent circling around you so intensely. “I just..” he nods toward the elevators. “The elevator to my floor is down. I checked the main office but no one’s there yet.. uh I just moved in yesterday. I’m not quite sure where the emergency stair case would be?”
You continue staring at him, slowly blinking as your ears fill up with cotton. There was just no way.. it was really him?!? The alpha you’d been obsessing over for the last two years? Here in the flesh, standing right before your eyes. It was like the picture of perfection, with the sun beating down right behind his large broad frame. You could hear angels singing, every move he made in slow motion.
“Are you..are you ok?” Jeno asks drawing his eyebrows up. You stumble back finally snapping yourself out of this, trance.
“I..uh..” you look down at the mail you dropped, squatting down to pick up everything. Jeno’s eyes widen following you, helping you with the ones that scattered further.
“Sorry again, I really didn’t mean to startle you like that.”
“No no!” You look up, staring into his eyes with shock. “Uh it’s uh.. “ you shake your head standing up, Jeno following holding out the envelopes he grabbed. “You’re..” you motion up and down his body.
“Oh! I just got back from my morning run. I always work out like this.” He says with a shy smile, rubbing over his stomach. Oh God, just like he does on live stream!
“You uhm.. stairs?.. stairs?” Your heart feels like it’s pounding out of your chest. No doubt Jeno could hear it too.
“Yea!” Jeno nods quickly breaking into a smile. The smile! You swallow clutching the mail to your chest, eyes bulging giving yourself a once over.
“Oh my God..” you whisper out loud, cringing. Of course you had to look like this right now of all times. Of course.
“If you’re busy I can just wait for someone to show up..” Jeno chews over his bottom lip. You shake your head eagerly.
“No no! I’ll help you!!” You nod, with too much excitement. “I know where the stairs are!”
“Oh great!” You nod again, walking ahead throwing Jeno a glance to follow you.
“My names Jeno by the way..” he walks steadily by your side keeping up a pace.
“I kn...uh, I uh..” you grimace stopping yourself before you end up giving yourself away.
“You must live on the beta floor?” Jeno questions, trying to keep the conversation flowing as you walk around the building. You lift a brow in confusion nodding your head.
“Well yea, my roommates a beta.. wait how did you know that?..” you pause near the stairs. Jeno looks you up and down.
“Oh? Your scent..” Jeno sniffs at the air. “You’re a beta right?”
“Me?! Beta?!” You look down at yourself, of course.. Jaemin’s hoodie. “Ohhh” you laugh out hysterically slapping your thigh. “No no! I’m an omega.. this is my roommates sweater, I just threw it on.”
“Ah, your partner is a beta?” Jeno crosses his arms over his chest, nice thick defined arms.
“Ew no, he’s my friend” you wave your hand off thinking about Jaemin. “I mean he’s.. I mean, I’m single!” You shout out, quickly covering up your mouth.
“That’s...good?” Jeno grins, glancing at the stairs. “I have to get going. Thank you for directing me. Again really sorry for surprising you like that. See you around?”
“Oh of course, anytime!” You wish the ground beneath you would just open up and eat you alive now more than ever. Jeno waves goodbye, jogging up the stairs. You wait until his gorgeous sculpted back is out of sight, beating your head against the wall.
“Stupid! Idiot! Oh my God! What am I going to do?!?” You look around crazed, pulling at Jaemin’s hood. “Stupid Jaemin!”
—————————————————————————
“This is all your fault. I need to move! I can’t live here anymore, he already saw me looking like a complete slop! Ugh” you shout out, throwing clothes out of your closet at Jaemin. He dodges all of your shoes, throwing everything else into a pile.
“Quit being so dramatic, this is a good thing isn’t it? Means you’ll run into him easily. You get to know him like two normal people. You’re not that bad you know, he could fall for you for all we know!” Jaemin picks up a black dress smoothing it out.
“He doesn’t like me!” You whine stomping your foot. “I could tell, my scent disgusted him. That’s all it takes! You know how many alphas I’ve fucked even though they didn’t like my scent? None! Because of something called Biology!”
“Hmm, that’s tough.” Jaemin stands up, nearing you. “You should wear this tonight. Will definitely get you laid.” He smirks holding the black strappy dress against your body. You snatch it away with a low growl.
“I am not going out tonight!”
“What?! Yes you are! A deal is a deal! Besides, what better way to get over this alpha, than getting under another one?! Come onnnnn, I already got us on the guest list for that club that just opened a couple months ago.” Jaemin drones, grabbing your arms.
“I hate you so much.” You look in the mirror holding the dress against yourself, slumping forward.
“Hey, you’re gonna love me after you get some alpha dick tonight!” Jaemin wiggles his eyebrows. “Get ready! I’ll get the uber to come in a couple hours.”
“I’m getting ripped tonight! R-I-P THAT PUSSY AYYEEEE!” Jaemin’s deep voice echoes through the hallway. You fall back against your bed ready to scream.
You better get some alpha dick tonight.
———————————————————————
“Can’t believe I let you talk me into this.” You groan, stirring your straw around in your drink. Jaemin leans in closer, eyes clouding with reds and pinks.
“Can’t really hear you! It’s too loud! I wanna dance!” Jaemin tugs on your arm pulling you away from the bar. He smoked the entire way to the club, high enough to touch clouds by now. You trudge along slowly, shoving into the center of the floor behind him.
“I’m just not in the mood..” you mumble staring at your feet.
“That’s not good, what do we need to do to change that?” A raspy deep voice whispers against your ear. You look up, Jaemin nowhere in sight anymore. The familiar scent of alpha running around you. Lifting your head with a look over your shoulder, you gasp dropping your mouth open- Jeno. He smiles lifting his brows, forehead creasing. “Guess we’re seeing each other sooner than expected?”
“I..” you squeak, jumping in surprise. Jeno pressing against your backside. Something very large nestling between your mounds.
“I think I’ll be able to help your mood..” Jeno leans his face in, moving your hair away to one side. Nose swiping across your collarbone, up your neck to your ear. “kn0tluvr.”
“Wha..you knew?!” You panic, reaching behind grabbing at Jeno’s shirt. “I’m sorr-..” Jeno places a finger against your lips.
“Shh shh shhh. Nothing to worry about baby.” Jeno grinds forward against the thin fabric of your dress, his size only becoming more prevalent with each move of his hips. “You just need a knot to fill you up don’t you?” Jeno bends his knees, hard cock shoving between your legs.
“Oh.. alpha.. please. Yes, I need it.” This had to be a dream. There was no way this was actually happening. Jeno’s hands slide beneath the side of your dress cupping your breasts.
“You wanna come home with me? Want to get stretched by my knot all night long?” He thrusts up between your legs. Fingers tweaking and pinching over your hardened nipples.
“Please alpha. Take me.” You mewl dropping back against his sturdy frame. Jeno engulfing your breasts in his strong hands, squeezing them roughly.
“Lets go.” Jeno wraps his arms around your waist, shoving through the crowd. Keeping you warm and protected, hard cock pressed up against you. The short drive home feeling like torture. Driver yelling at you to control yourselves or he’ll charge extra for slick stains and pheromone blockers. Jeno runs around, pulling you out of the car running into the building.
“Fuck, the stairs” he looks around in frustration, slamming his fist against the elevator door. You whimper, squeezing your thighs together, slick traveling down to your knees. Jeno grunts, hoisting you up, pulling your legs around his waist. “Hold on to me.”
He carries you up the stairs so easily, displaying a true powerful alpha. Your hands travel over his shoulders, squeezing around his rippling biceps. Slick steadily pouring out of your core, crying in anticipation. Jeno fumbles around with a key behind you, kicking at his door. He charges in once it finally gives, pressing you into the wall, grinding forward.
“I’m gonna fucking cum already.” Jeno groans, pounding you against the wall faster. Slick soaking his pants, your underwear completely destroyed. You cry out, dropping your head back. If it felt this big with clothes on, you couldn’t even fathom just how big he’d be without.
“Jeno, fuck me please. I need your knot” you drop your head forward, feeling like a rag doll with how fast you were bouncing. Jeno’s thighs flexed hard, thrusting up into your brutally.
“Oh fuckkk” he let’s out a low deep drawn out whine, shoving at you one more time. Grimacing at the uncomfortable stickiness caught between his legs. He moves swiftly, gathering you up stumbling toward his bedroom. Dropping you down onto a king sized bed, you look around in awe. His chair, desk, the set up with his games. This was really happening.
“Won’t have to jerk off into this tonight after all.” Jeno holds up your shirt with a smile. Your mouth falls open yet again, in total astonishment. Jeno pulls off his shirt, unbuttoning his pants watching you. You feel heated, worked up already just staring at the alpha revealing himself. His body even more perfect than you could have ever imagined.
“Alpha.. “ Jeno pulls down his pants, hard cock springing free. Your chest rising and falling with speed, gazing in awe. He’s wasn’t big, no not at all, he was monstrous. An alpha crafted by an artists hands with time and care. Your eyes watered up just imagining Jeno splitting you open. He moves onto the bed, straddling your thighs. Hard cock swinging with each move of his hips. Jeno lifts your hand placing it around his size. You let out a cry from the back of your throat, tears slipping out. Your hand not able to squeeze anything more than the tip.
“Alpha, knot me. P-please kn-..knot me.” You stutter out. So overcome with too many thoughts, too much pleasure. The man you’d been fantasizing about for the last two years hovering above you. Bare, ready to destroy your insides. His hands slide up your thighs, pushing your dress up. Jeno takes in a deep inhale, slick coating your thighs an embarrassing amount.
“You smell so fucking good. Feel like my head’s about to explode.” Jeno leans down, shoving his face between your legs. Biting at the cotton of your soaked underwear, sucking the wetness out of the fabric. You pull your dress off the rest of the way tossing it aside, hips stuttering against his mouth. When Jeno lifts his face to look at you, his chin and lips are dripping in your wetness.
“So wet for me omega” Jeno gathers the fabric of your panties, pulling them up until your folds squeeze out around it. You hiss with an arch, the fabric rubbing against your clit with each pull. More slick rushes out, streaming down past your ass onto Jeno’s bed. He licks over his lips, glaring down at you with ferocity behind his eyes. Hand slapping down against your soaking center harshly. The smack delivering droplets of slick into the air.
“Such a good girl.” Jeno slaps your pussy again, hand landing harshly covered in slick. You grit your teeth together whimpering, shoving your hips up begging for more.
“Jeno..fuck me please.” You shed many tears, admiring the way your slick gleams across his lower stomach. Jeno moves fast, pulling your ruined underwear aside. He settles between your legs, pulling your thighs around his hips with a firm grip on you. Cock sliding between your folds, covering in your wetness. He licks at your hot tears, leaving small pecks in their place.
“Gonna be the best omega for me aren’t you? Take all my knot. Suck out all my cum.” You nod rapidly in response. Too strung out, high on pleasure and heat to get words out. Jeno lines up to your cunt prodding at your entrance. He felt so large, larger than any you’d ever taken. Jeno pushes in slowly, walls fluttering around his cock head trying to accommodate around his size. Your eyes roll back far into your head, lower half on fire.
“Feel so good. Tight little pussy squeezing around me so good omega.” Jeno stares down between you watching every inch of himself disappear. He mumbles swears to himself, drool dripping out of his mouth watching the bulge form in your stomach.
“That has to hurt baby.” He grits out, fully seething inside of you. You pant loudly, entire body rising and falling. White spots clouding your vision. Your hands tremble, reaching for Jeno’s shoulders.
“Fill me up, fuck me..full..of your knot.” You manage to stutter out between deep breaths. Jeno’s face drops into your neck, nose inhaling over your scent gland. He grinds into you a few times, letting you get used to the size stretching you wide open. Jeno squeezes at your thighs pulling his hips back. Falling into a rough pace, fucking you into the bed. One of your hands slips down his chest, reaching between your bodies. Fingers sliding down your walls, squeezing at his girth with every thrust.
“Al-alpha please..” you whimper, rubbing at your clit only once. Clenching down around his size, Jeno’s hips stuttering, thrusting past your orgasm. Slick squirting out enough to jump into the air past Jeno’s head. Your stomach hollows in, emptying out. Jeno’s hips unrelenting chasing his own climax. “J-jeno...alpha!” You shout out, head falling back. Jeno pounds into you mercilessly, bed shaking so hard beneath your bodies.
Loud groans and gasps escape Jeno’s lips into your skin. His thrusts never faltering, deeply reaching inside you. He sits up on his knees shoving your thighs forward, throwing his body weight into every thrusts.
“That’s a good omega. Takes everything, deserves to be filled.” Jeno thrust in deep with a groan, stilling as his knot finally expands. Your cunt clinging around him, looking swollen and abused. He groans out whines, cum spurting inside you. Both of your eyes gazing in awe watching the way your stomach bloats.
“That’s it baby. Take all my fucking cum.” Jeno’s eyes squeeze shut, nose scrunching up with the last spurt releasing. You push your hips forward, biting down on your lip. He looks down at you with crazed wide opened eyes.
“Fuck me with your knot. Don’t stop.” You sigh, grinding against the size locked inside of you. Jeno falls forward, smoothing hair out of your face with a jolt of his hips.
“Holy shit.”
————————————————————————-
You weakly limp into your apartment, moving like a snail toward the kitchen. Jaemin opens an eye, groaning from the couch with a bag of frozen veggies melting on his head.
“Are you just getting in? I thought you were asleep?” He questions. You pour yourself a cup of coffee from the pot he’d made already. Before you answer, there’s a knock at the door. You groan, waving for Jaemin to get up and answer it. He grunts lifting himself up, dragging toward to the knocking.
“I’m coming! Geesh..” Jaemin pulls the door open, mouth hanging instantly. Jeno lights up, looking around him.
“Hey! You forgot your phone!” He waves it around in the air. Jaemin gawking back and forth between the two of you. You slowly limp over, Jeno showing concern.
“Why didn’t you let me carry you up here? I knew you were sore” he frowns, moving next to Jaemin. You let out a soft smile, Jaemin the embodiment of ‘what the fuck’.
“It’s ok.” You look to Jaemin, tapping his chin to shut his mouth. “By the way, don’t hate you anymore.”
Alpha Camboys Are Ruining My Life—>
Tag: @seuomo
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