KAZ BREKKER ONE SHOT
Warnings: blood, talks of miscarriage.
Pairing: Kaz Brekker & (OC) Emily
Kaz Brekker opened the door, not expecting to see the young girl on her knees, crying into the bedsheets. He paused, not knowing what to say, awkwardly staring around the room for something else to look at.
Finally, he cleared his throat. The young girl spun around, parts of her hair falling out of her bun, sticking to her face from the tears. Her cheeks were as red as bricks and her eyes bloodshot.
“Pardon me, Miss Emily, but I need to have a word with you.” He would never admit it, but he felt sorry for the poor girl. She’d only been in his possession for a week, and he wished things could have started off on a better level.
Emily rose to her feet, wobbling as she went along, having to grab onto the nightstand to keep her balance. “I’m sorry, Mr. Brekker. I don’t know what came over me...”
“Are you alright?” He asked, sure he knew the answer. He stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. “I know you feel like a prisoner here, it isn’t every day you’re kidnapped.” To Kaz, this was teasing. He tried a little smile along with the (what he thought were) comforting words.
Emily took a seat on the edge of the bed, using a small napkin to clean her face up a bit. “I’m afraid to say that is not the reason for my outburst.” She stammered.
Kaz sat down in a chair close to her bed, not watching her tidy up. He cursed himself for not giving her the time to do so alone. “Did someone say something to you? I’ll have them tortured.” He clenched his fist tighter around his crows head cane.
“No... I mean, nothing mean.” Emily sniffed and pulled her hair down, letting it fall around her shoulders. Kaz thought she had the most beautiful head of hair, even wanted to compliment it. “I got some news today.”
“Oh?” Kaz set his jaw. He’d had Emily checked out when he first brought her to the Slat. He had paid off her debts to another Barrel gang and rehomed her in the Slat until they could find a better home for her, although Kaz didn’t want to let her go. He’d watched her around town, watching how the other gang treated her poorly. Finally, he made enough kruge to pay off the debts she had and... he hadn’t known exactly what to do after that.
Emily looked up at him, her round doe-like eyes carrying heavy bags from lack of sleep. “They told me I’m pregnant.”
Kaz blinked, unsure what to say to that. Here he was, fawning over this girl as she’s crying her eyes out and carrying a child. “Oh...” He looked down at the ground. Kaz had an answer for everything, except for this. “Can I get you anything?”
“A Grisha to rid me of this creature.” Emily’s voice cracked as she spoke.
Kaz felt like his heart was being squished. He knew the kind of pain that would bring to her, what sort of mental state that could put her through. Not that he knew first hand, but he’d heard the stories. A Grisha getting rid of the thing growing inside of you... That was a lot on a person. “Do you want to think this over?” He questioned.
“Look at me.”
Against his better judgement, Kaz met her gaze. She was in enough pain already, what was one more thing. He knew that baby wasn’t wanted, never was. Now he understood why she flinched any time a hand reached for her.
“I can’t have this baby. Every time I have to look at it, I’ll remember how it happened. I could die in child birth, the child could die, there’s so many things that could go wrong. I’d rather suffer through that tomorrow and heal myself slowly than have this baby and carry the memories with me.” She stated, more tears rolling down her cheeks. “Kaz, please.”
Not once has she called Kaz by his first name until tonight. He liked the sound of it rolling off her tongue, despite the situation. He hoped she’d say it again. “I’ll see if Nina can do it.” He nodded.
Emily sighed in relief. “Thank you,” she reached for his knee, only she must’ve remembered what happened last time she touched him and pulled her hand away.
“I’ll get you Nina.” He stated, rising to his feet and exiting the room quietly.
It took some convincing for Nina to help Emily, but in the end, she accepted Emily’s pleas and she began to work on removing the child for the young girl. It was going to be an all night process, so Kaz made sure they were both as comfortable as possible, asking what they might need and getting them triple anything they requested.
He made sure that anyone else stayed clear of Emily’s room, told them all to spend the night out at the clubs or in their own rooms. Kaz never experienced this for himself, he just knew the stories weren’t pretty.
And he was right. He wished he, too, would have left the Slat that night. Screams echoed off the walls, down the halls, and rang through his head the entire night. Even in his attic room, he heard the faint cries coming from one floor down. It was the worst thing he ever witnessed.
Before they got started, Kaz asked if either one of them needed someone to stay in there with them. They both shook their heads, tears running down their faces. “This is something she has to do alone.” Nina had told him. “But she will need someone there when it’s over.”
Those words stuck with him.
Kaz woke up to Nina saying his name. He opened his eyes to peer up, a woman staring back at him. He jumped with a start, realizing he must have fallen asleep at his desk.
“She needs you.” Nina mumbled. Her hair was a mess, soaking wet from the sweat. Her dress stained with blood and... Kaz wasn’t going to ask what else. She looked exhausted.
The boy jumped to his feet, grabbed his cane, and headed for the stairs. “There’s breakfast in the kitchen for you, Nina. Go rest now.” He called over his shoulder.
“Thank you, Kaz.” She said, though her voice was barely there.
Kaz hurried down the stairs, forgetting to brace himself for what he might see in the room or the pain shooting up his leg, he just knew he had to make sure she was okay.
Knocking softly on the door before entering, he gently opened the door. “Emily?” He whispered.
Inside he found that Nina must’ve already cleaned up quite a bit. He saw bloodied towels thrown in a hamper near the door, sheets, clothing. The odor in the room was that of roses and coffee, covering the already faint smell from last night. Kaz was thankful that Nina thought of that.
Curled up underneath clean sheets, he saw Emily’s outline. She was breathing heavily, hair sticking out of the top in a messy, half fallen bun.
“My dear.” Kaz kept his voice down as he stood awkwardly at the edge of the bed. “Can I get you anything?”
“Can you sit down, please?” Her voice was hoarse from all the screaming, but he managed to understand her request.
He licked his lips, gazing down at the small girl. She was only half his size, and he loved to tease her about it when she first started settling in. “As you wish.” He braced himself, pushing out those intrusive thoughts. He sat on the bed, careful to put his cane against the wall so it didn’t hit her.
She rolled over, facing him now, and looked up at him. Her face was swollen, her hair falling out of the lazy bun, her cheeks stained from the tears, and he still thought that this woman was beautiful.
“Don’t look at me,” she pleaded, hiding her face in the pillow. “I’m hideous.”
“You are... breathtaking.” Kaz breathed, unaware that this was not the time for compliments.
Giggling, Emily moved closer, causing Kaz’s heart to stop completely. Her head was on his thigh before he could jump away. Panic coursed through him, his fingers going numb, his vision blurring as he tried to think of a way out of this. “You are a strange one, Brekker.”
Her voice slowly pulled him out of his panic. He peered down at her and watched her eyes flutter closed. “You’ll be taken care of here.” He stated, his gloved hand hovering over her shoulder, wanting to touch her, to comfort her.
“Don’t leave me...” she croaked.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He mumbled, letting his fingers brush against her shoulder. It hadn’t made him want to vomit, though he still couldn’t exactly feel the tips of his fingers yet. “Rest, my darling.”
Emily reached up with a shaky hand and grabbed his belt, keeping her hand there as she slowly started to drift off to sleep.
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