#let her sit. let her breathe.

[fictionadventurer]

There's something about reading really great writing that's so relaxing. You can just sit back and let the words wash over you, knowing that you can trust the writer.

#random thought of the day #books #part of the reason i'm not getting writing done today was because i spent most of my free time reading from books i've let sit for too long #i haven't been able to sink into good fiction for a while #so elizabeth goudge felt like a spiritual experience #cleansing and uplifting #it always takes me a while to get into her books #there's a learning curve of a couple of chapters to adjust to the style #but once i break through it's bliss #it becomes easy as breathing #there's nothing quite like what she does #i love books that understand that goodness isn't boring or trite #you don't need to have 'darkness' and 'grit' to be complex #like one bit that took my breath away was the talk about sallie and david's marriage struggles #they're both good people who love each other #but they also have their differences because they're human and that causes struggles #not marriage-breaking struggles just nuanced life struggles #and i'm not sure i've seen something like that in a book before #it's a good marriage they married the right people but that doesn't mean life is perfect #goudge uderstands that marriage isn't happily ever after--heaven is #and a good marriage is two people partnering up to help each other reach that goal #it's so much more adult than any 'complex adult' work i've seen

[kiwizono]

Hot take: People wouldn’t hate Teruko as much if she was a man

#kae's yapping tag #let’s talk about it though #because the way fandom as a whole treats female characters is so??? #people will sit on their soap box and praise david like it’s their last day on earth #but then in the same breath will criticize teruko and call her a bitch #like… ​get real. #danganronpa despair time #despair time #drdt #teruko tawaki

[scatmaan]

shep goes through some things in the citadel dlc

#mass effect #me3 #samara #mshep #sam shepard #but samara then samara appears... like a beacon #her 'lets just sit here in silence' #is a breath of fresh air to him #lazily finishing these doodles #so i can post them

[vividfriend]

phantom heartbeat

imogen has never heard such a slow heartbeat before, not that she makes it a habit of going around listening to ‘em, mind you. it’s just different, she thinks, as she presses her ear more firmly to laudna’s chest.

though her memories are covered in a thick fog borne of time, she still remembers how easily her daddy had scooped her up into his arms so many years ago. she remembers how he held her to his chest as he stood on their sun bleached porch, looking out at the beginning of a new day. she remembers the curiosity she felt as she put an ear to his chest, how she gasped at how loud it was, how strong it felt.

(“daddy, why d’you tick so loudly?” she had asked, eyes sparkling with the kind of wonder only a six year old could have.

her daddy had smiled, something he did so often back then, as he pressed her tiny fingers to his chest. “gotta keep tickin’ to live, sweetheart. you tick, too.”

“i do?” she gasped as she brought her other hand to her own chest, surprised to find how steadily it thrummed against her palm.)

she can’t help but observe how there’s something so odd about hearing laudna’s heartbeat now against that memory. how it thrums so delicately against her ribs, a slow and gentle rhythm, just barely there and almost dull in how soft it beats. and it’s hard for imogen to correlate the word dull to the woman beneath her because laudna is anything but.

laudna is rich and vibrant, more than just a passing phantom, stronger than any puppet. laudna is a shimmering beacon brighter than any moon, imogen thinks, and is startled at how quickly her own heartbeat picks up as if to chase that thought.

underneath imogen’s ear, laudna’s lungs breathe, her blood rushes, her heart beats and beats and beats—

a reminder,

a reason,

a confession.

#this has been sitting in my drafts for a bit #thought I’d let it breathe #having feelings about Imogen laying on Laudna’s chest #listening to her heartbeat #imogen temult #laudna #relvin temult #critical role #imodna #my writing #also don’t mind me just playing around with formatting!

[modern-inheritance]

*passing out blankies to the Trauma Twins, Brom, Eragon, Saphira, Murtagh, Thorn, Nasuada, and heck even Angela*

I've not done anything to them today. Just figured they'd be a bit cold.

#im now imagining everyone sitting together like 'where'd these come from' 'do not care they are warm and fuzzy unlike my past' #'who invited the angst bois' 'eragon did.' #'brom's gonna tell spooky stories.' 'Arya stop using glen's arm as a tent pole' #saphira is quite happy to become the new tent pole #she's got the blankie over her snout. purposeful fire hazard. #angela has torn hers up and began knitting a whole new one from the shreds #glen's teaching Murtagh and Thorn breathing techniques. it's actually going well. #eragon purposefully misplaces his blankie and asks if Arya will share. because its her duty as a bodyguard to keep him safe and warm. #she rolls her eyes but still lets him in because he's a dork but he's her dork when saphira lets her borrow him. #i donno these nerds needed a break. #eragon #inheritance cycle #the cyclists #the world of eragon #the inheritance cycle #modern inheritance #ket's modern inheritance cycle

[jedi-bird]

I'm back home, showered and in bed with my heating pad. I did not murder anyone at the event, which is good. We were lied to however, about what was required for us to bring, which I'm not surprised about. I don't want to have to repeat it all tomorrow, even if it's on a smaller scale. I'm tired.

But at least the ham tasted good and the crumble, while much less sweet than last time, was good and I didn't have to stay until super late. Small victories.

#vent post #look i like my in-laws but this year I'm just not feeling social #i sick of being judged because i need to sit in specific chairs and can't help with a lot of the cleanup #i get told in the same breath that a lot of my problems are probably because of my cats but then get asked if i want a new one #because someone has a problem cat they don't want to deal with anymore but they won't let it get adopted out #and also get told I'm probably pretty happy that mine are all starting to die off because i clearly have too many #no one told us there was going to be a gift exchange so we didn't bring anything #which is fine because we were planning to leave early anyway #I'm tired of dealing with people right now #I'm feeling very overwhelmed and at a breaking point #and i want to tell my partner that i don't want to spend my birthday helping my mother in law take down her tree #i don't want to have to cater to her on a day i already associated with bad things #i just want to lay in bed if I'm not allowed to go anywhere fun

[captainofthetidesbreath]

We really are in the "some people in the fandom actively claim that a character said something they categorically did not / outright mischaracterize what a character said" portion of the post-Dramatic Event week, huh.

#lmfao at that post claiming that Chet was saying that Laudna didn't deserve to come back as much as Orym #His exact quote: 'Laudna's been dead before. Maybe something could happen. Orym is just living and breathing like everybody else.' / cont. #'If you want to make a decision‚ that might sway it. Or‚ flip the coin and let fate have it.' #If anything it sounded like Chet was saying 'Laudna MAY just sit back up on her own because she did that once before.' #Chet is also the THIRD person to remark she died before. #Critical Role things #CR #CR spoilers

[izuizzy]

How They Show Affection aka OC Dynamics / Kohaku Edition

#chasing nova 🌟 #artists on tumblr #my art #art #drawing #oc #original character #kohaku nanase #tora nanase #yuki shinomori #kiryu suzumura #haku and tora are literally best siblings i cannot express this enough #no matter what haku will always be there for tora and he'll protect her till his last breath. she's THAT important to him. #they basically grew up together since tora was adopted when they were both young kids #i like to imagine that haku doesn’t really give yuki a lot of like skinship but he just sits beside her or back to back (his fave) to just #let her know he’s there and that he isn’t going anywhere #and haku and kiryu are best rivals. the coolest brotp ever #even tho techincally haku doesn't see it as a rivalry and it's just a friendship to him #but kiryu decided haku was his rival and so it just goes on like that LOL

[quietwingsinthesky]

thinks about child-but-growing-fast amara and lucifer in the same room and gets ill.

#im gonna get called a homestuck again im SORRY its a good trope #she’s not his mom but she is. older than him and older than god and a being he helped imprison. #and the effects of that. here and now. are that she is so weak she has to relearn how to exist. #that she has to eat souls. tear them out one by one. you have to imagine that lucifer once saw her devour whole galaxies on a whim. #back when everything was moving in constant flux between destruction and creation. you have to imagine. #what is it to see her like this. is it pitiable. awful. comforting because she can’t hurt him right now and if he struck first maybe she #never could? #would he think about this moment this experience later when he’s made human. when he experiences a similar powerlessness. #anyway. lucifer gets out of the cage and trashes crowley’s place to kidnap his aunt-who-is-baby-right-now #u know me i love when characters go on the run together. what a weird little bond they’d form. #how do you overcome the anger at someone who helped cage you for eternity? does it help to know he didn’t escape your fate just because he #helped seal it when it was you? do you think they trade cage stories. #do you think lucifer tells her about how michael is still trapped in there and when he goes quiet. it’s not him who says he’s glad michael #knows what it’s like. it’s amara who says it. with an anger older than time. bitter enough to sting. #arms curled around herself because she’s hungry now. always hungry. tries not to think about what lucifer would taste like. (powerful) #sitting on a bench together watching people (souls. meals.) walk by. talking about prisons. talking about justice. maybe. or revenge. same #thing. and amara is leaning against him coiled tight through every muscle in her body and so so hungry. and when she says she’s glad michael #is suffering she isn’t really talking about him. but when she says it. lucifer lets out a breath. and says. me too. #and then he goes to find her something(one) to eat. #u see my vision. u do.

[todayisafridaynight]

‘The worst thing she can say is no’ and its the proposal scene from LAD8

#snap chats #HELPPPP THATS SO SAD #im an asshole for not posting the vid but if anyone asks ill share it #im just on mobile and im lazy LMAO BUT ANYWAY #NOOOOOO LIKE. I CANT TELL IF THIS IS BETTER OR WORSE #i thought saeko blew up or would have a volatile reaction #like i was holding my breathe waiting for her to hit him or yell because thats so typical innit #but no she just. Lets Go Home :) My Answer? Uhh Let’s Go :) #LIKE MISS MA’AM???? DAMNN poor ichi #twelve bucks saying they get married at the end #BUT GOD DAMN THATS LIKE.. SOMEHOW WORSE THAN JUST SAYING NO #ichi pouring his whole heart and soul out… ALSO THIS ISNT A DIG AT SAEKO AT ALL NO NEVER #JUST… MAN… i wanna know what shes thinking…. #shes shown shes not used to having friends so never mind the thought of marriage and a KID #i mean presumably they mustve been dating a while but either way…. wow….. #jan 26th get here soon. im having a horrible day just please distract me #i told yall going to my moms is always a nightmare i wanna leave but i cant go until monday #anyway bye……. im gonna just. sit here LMAO

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: December 15

"Bad Goodbye" by Clint Black

#song of the day #I really like the writing in the chorus of this song. 'good bye: easier said than done' and 'in my good-bye you're finding none' #Duncan's been on a Clint Black kick for a while now #he plays it while he's in the shower and it comes through into my room--sometimes his music choices are more objectionable #I really really do not like 'Roundabout' by Yes--but the Clint Black has been very nice. soothing #I can't breathe unless I'm sitting up but Jo doesn't understand why I won't lay flat and let her walk around on me and she's mad about it

[firefurious]

in relation to what we were just talking about , but . how does grace cope with all the bullshit that happens to her in the week the game takes place in ? can she sleep ? does she cry or have any sort of breakdown privately ? or does she sort of just . not let herself stop and think about the trial ( yet at the same time be motivated by it ) and all these petty and spiteful fucks getting in her way ?

for the most part, grace is just pushing through and not letting herself stop. i think she knows there's literally no time for it; she can't give herself the luxury to process everything that's happening to her because each moment wasted on that is a moment less to figure out what happened and prove her innocence.

which means she gets terribly stressed out whenever whoever is helping her tells her to just wait. not only it's time she feels she could be using to act, waiting is when everything threatens to catch up to her and she can't stop. she doesn't wanna risk not being able to pick herself up again.

she sleeps very little, and mostly only because the stress and exhaustion of everything happening in such a short time just knocks her out eventually (i know apollo wanted her to rest but consider: she can't relax). i feel for the most part grace is either acting or considering what to do next. i could say preparing but honestly people keep her in the dark about what she's supposed to do next so often that the most she can prepare is like. preparing herself to face anything jsdnfakjsnd

and so she does! going to a club and facing down a goddess in a song battle? sure. going to the reliquary to find the minotaur? okay. going to a party no one wants to tell her anything about and adapting as she learns? will do. there's no other choice. so she just faces whatever bullshit people throw at her the best she can (as she says in my favorite reply to athena after it's determined there will be a trial, and the one reply i'd keep as canon for my blog: okay, it's unfair but it is what it is. she'll do her best. it's all she can do).

i think the only breakdown she has is very visible and it happens when freddie dies. it's also the one moment i feel she'd falter because to her, her life isn't worth more than freddie's. there's this dialogue option where she says 'it should've been me' that i feel is very fitting with how she'd feel about it. and at least with apollo, his reply ends with something like 'freddie gave you a chance' — that honestly is something i feel would lead her to keep pushing through. freddie died to give her a chance. she won't squander that opportunity, no matter how much she wishes things had been different. it's the least she can do when it's what freddie would've wanted her to do.

other than that, no, she never stops to cry or despair or breakdown even in private. all her energy is dedicated to keep going, no matter what happens. people around her might forget her life is on the line, but she doesn't. they might act like there is time, but she can't, she knows there isn't. it's definitely not stopping to think about it while keeping it as a motivator; a very serious threat that keeps her going but that she won't examine too closely so she won't breakdown.

after the trial, it'd probably take days for the sense of impending danger and the adrenaline and anxiety of being Constantly dealing with something to finally fade. and when it did... well.. that's when i think she'd really start to process it. to cry and feel the weight of it full force and be happy she's alive and be angry she had to go through all that and be devastated about freddie's loss. even then, i'd consider everything that happened pretty traumatic, from calliope dying in her arms to being sentenced to death to having a week to prove her innocence and everything that happens there. it's not like she'd get over it fast. it wouldn't stop haunting her soon after it was done. she can't just forget about it.

she'd definitely be on guard and have trouble sleeping, and i think the restlessness also lingers. i think her keeping herself so busy after the trial is also a means to cope; still not letting herself stop for too long or think too hard about what happened. hoping given time it'll be distant enough she won't have trouble with it anymore.

#we were playing today and some of the dialogue really just. cemented to me she's just on #'have to keep going my life literally depends on it' mode #i don't think she'd stop and take a breath even once the whole week #and i think she only sleeps when she. can't stay awake anymore #also after freddie's death before you talk to apollo/persephone grace is sitting on the couch #just staring at the table where freddie's hat is #and the camera even does this thing to show her view and how unfocused it becomes and i just #think she'd have been like that for a while #that after freddie dies she seriously has a moment of 'what's even the point of this my best friend died bc of me' #and that it's the only moment she really falters and lets things catch up to her a little #but mostly it's just freddie's death that is so. overwhelming and fills her with so much grief and sorrow and guilt she's #close to giving up before being convinced this isn't what freddie wanted #i'm rambling #DSFIASDFJASIDJF #thanks for the ask mars #mwah #* grace: study.

[weardes]

#suburra #aureliano adami #spadino anacleti #my gifs #the way he immediately tries to stifle a sob when Spadino sits down beside him #holds his breath #and then exhales very slowly #with control #there’s so much pain and longing for comfort bottled up inside #pls let yourself go bby and cry into your boyfriend’s shoulder #you know you need it #also that’s probably a little weird but I just love how Aureliano SoUnDs in this episode? #all these scenes with Livia where he’s like a raw nerve #he breathes hard through his nose and huffs and cries and growls like a wounded animal #when he says ‘I’ve been many things to you but never a boss’ #so low and choked and resigned and just so so sad I can’t even *inhuman screeching* #when he sees the dead bodyguard and calls Livia’s name desperately #and his voice breaks because he’s so afraid he’s going to lose her again #when he cries over Livia’s body like a little boy #and then this scene on the beach #top quality sounds my man #i want to crawl into a hole and die

[woundedheartwithin]

Fuckin rat snake broke into the brooder coop and ate two of my peeps. It had the little maran wrapped up when I ran out there, but I heard her screaming from inside the house and was able to get to her in time. She’s okay, a little banged up and scared, but she’s bright and alert, no pain or heat anywhere in her body, no broken bones, just a pretty big wound where the snake had bitten her. So now she’s in the house, in a tub in the laundry room with the door shut so the cat can’t get her, and that’s where she’ll stay until she’s big enough to go in with the adults

Fuckin snakes, man. Listen, I love snakes, I do, but not when they eat my fucking birds. I don’t even know how it got in either???? Like the coop is all wood and hardware cloth with no gaps, where the fuck did you even get in ya sumbitch :(

#she speaks #she’s a very very lucky bird #I was sitting in the living room watching a movie with my family #and if I hadn’t been she woulda died too #the coops are right behind the house so I could hear her screaming #I literally kicked the side of the coop until he let her go #and like I thought she was fucking dead #she was all folded up and sprawled out #and I stepped on the snake to keep it from biting me and looked at her #and she was still breathing #so I grabbed her and handed her to my dad #then grabbed the snake and pulled it out of the coop #poor little bird sat there for a long time while my dad went and got the tub and fixed in for her #and she was just staring at me and breathing hard #then she had the nerve to run from me when I went to pick her up again lmfao #I’m just kidding she was terrified I totally don’t blame her #she’s gonna have to get real okay with me picking her up real quick tho #cuz I gotta treat her wound periodically #that’s one thing about keeping farm animal is you get really good at wound care #all the knowledge of a vet tech with none of the certifications or paycheck 😭😭😭 #anyway she’ll be alright #she’s safe in the house and the wound is nothing she won’t recover from #the biggest concern was broken bones but her legs wings and keel are all perfect #if her neck were broken she’d be dead so I’m not concerned about that lol #and she’s not sore and there’s no abnormal heat indicating injury #chickens are resilient little creatures with an astounding will to live

[badolmen]

“It’s all good!” It is not all good.

#ra speaks #personal #*steady breathing* I am not bothered at all I am not bothered at all #didn’t do my stats homework earlier (my fault for obeying the writing vibes and banging out a few thousand words) #but then like this lady I’m supposed to be helping overcome her driving anxiety (because I’m trying so goddamn hard to be a nice person) #was supposed to drive with me like an hour ago but she didn’t respond to my messages #so you know how autism brain works I Cannot Do Anything until I know what’s happening w this appmt #anyways she cancelled bc it’s too cold ma’am you car had heating. ma’am. #I mean I get it it’s like the coldest two days of winter rn but also #not using your car for two weeks is sketchy let alone letting it sit even longer in this weather #everything is fine I’m just struggling to be a functional human

[silverislander]

fully intended and foreseen consequence of coping better with my anxiety is that this blog will at some point inevitably become More Cringe and that point is SO close on the horizon. if you get mad at me for posting things i like on my blog that is for me you clearly have more issues than i do for worrying abt that possibility for hours on end

#its tumblr were all cringe here. fucking grow up or leave genuinely #also i literally tag everything im into + trigger tags too. block tags or just unfollow me theres no hard feelings i prommy #anyway. ive been falling back into creepypasta which ive mentioned before i was super into as a teen! fun stuff #i love that the fandom is still alive and doing fun new stuff :') theres such good art out there!! and character interpretations!!!! #and ive also gotten really into league lore over the past few months actually. the arcane fixation has morphed #basically it went 'this character looks cool whats their deal. whats this region like. oh another neat character lets look into that' #and then suddenly i know too much™️ bc hyperfixations for me are about gathering information and stories like a raccoon #i have FEELINGS about it. post probably incoming soon abt that #and BRIAR!! shes a little gremlin i kind of love her already #levi.txt #will i delete this in the morning? lets see #but for real tho. im doing really good lately. things arent perfect but i feel like a person for once #i can talk to strangers without acting like a trapped prey animal! it turns out im fucking funny actually! people like my jokes #im SLEEPING again. regularly. that was an issue for nearly a year and im doing ok again (not perfect but hey! ~8hrs!!) #i can just. sit around in public now and not feel like im on a hidden camera show where everyone is judging the way i breathe #slowly switching from self deprecation 'i want to die' jokes to 'im literally gods favourite prince and the hottest bitch alive' #i still get really nervous but it doesnt feel like a personal flaw and it doesnt feel insurmountable anymore #so yeah naturally thats going to come with (hopefully) a lot less shame around things that i like #just asking kindly that people are normal abt it. this is me thriving i guess