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girl help they’re making me do my job while all i want to do is talk abt obi wan kenobi. something something cybercrime resilience monitoring HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT OBI WAN KENOBI. A PHENOMENAL PILOT WHO DOESN’T LIKE TO FLY. A DEVASTATING WARRIOR WHO’D RATHER NOT FIGHT. A NEGOTIATOR WITHOUT PEER WHO FRANKLY PREFERS TO SIT ALONE IN A QUIET CAVE AND MEDITATE. JEDI MASTER. GENERAL IN THE GRAND ARMY OF THE REPUBLIC. MEMBER OF THE JEDI COUNCIL. HE HAS BECOME THE HERO OF THE NEXT GENERATION OF PADAWANS; HE IS THE JEDI THEIR MASTERS HOLD UP AS A MODEL. HE IS THE BEING THE COUNCIL ASSIGNS TO THEIR MOST IMPORTANT MISSIONS. HE IS MODEST, CENTERED, AND ALWAYS KIND. HE IS THE ULTIMATE JEDI.
i’ve been toying with the idea of a time travelling buck fic recently, and this whole business with i love you to the core is playing with my feelings because then,
i can imagine an older buck, probably 35, definitely more settled and comfortable and secure and because he can’t really control where he goes (or maybe he does, doesn’t matter yet) he finds himself with an 8 year old evan. and he’s bruised up with scrapes on his knees and it’s the fifth time this month and it’s been a year since he found out he can somehow gain his parents’ attention this way, but lately it doesn’t feel as good. the pizzas they would buy him, the ice creams after, the smile his mom would give him. it’s not worth all the blood and scratches, at least not all the time. he’s just a kid and he’s needy, he’ll get what he can.
but buck travels to this specific time, to this specific version of himself and he hasn’t time travelled yet, no, so young evan doesn’t know it’s him, but he remembers. he remembers as 8 year old evan how 35 year old buck comes to him, and now he’s that buck. and he feels overwhelmed. he feels like he could drown, but he won’t because he can save himself.
so he lets himself sit beside evan on the curb next to their house. he lets the kid talk his ear off about a new bike, and when he asks about his bloody knee, evan looks down ashamed. but he knows, and he’s prepared so he brings out a gauze and a cream he found much much later on that works so amazing on him. and the kid looks up at him grateful and he can see the doubt, the insecurity, the questions of why he was even here and he can’t wait for him to know that someday, someone’s going to love him to the core. someone’s going to know him deep down on what makes him him and they’re going to love him. all of him, all of the parts he thinks are too much, all of the parts he thinks are defective—he’s still going to love you, evan. love us.