#let me meet my person

[inkskinned]

it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.

#writeblr #warm up #i can't write rn but i have SO much words in here bc im reading the chorus of dragons books #(just started book 4) #and this woman's writing is just LIVING in my brain. let me out!!! #(i read roughly like 2-4 books a week usually bc i go on long walks with my dog but when a book is REALLY good like. it eats my life. ) #anyway ...... so like here's a story that idk i've tried to explain to other people as being wild #but maybe im the only one who thinks it is wild??? #so i play pokemon go (i just started in jan) bc i love pokemon and as i have mentioned i walk goblin for like an hour in the morning #and i don't like a lot of fitness trackers due to the fact it makes me .sad. but i also wanted the little digital rewards. enter pokemon go #anyway so they make you make friends to complete quests. so i used a reddit thread. i do not usually use reddit. i don't have an acct #i lurked. i just googled like ''pokemon go reddit '' and randomly added a bunch of numbers #i was on that page for all of 15 minutes. there are THOUSANDS of responses on that page. #here's what's wild: in that group of people. even though i am not on reddit and it was one random event once #it turns out one of those people lives in the town i live in. or at least very close. i only know this because #when we send each other gifts. it's from the same freaking area. #i can't ask them to meet up bc pokemon go doesn't have a messaging app lol but like . what are the fucking chances that #a random person posts in a random reddit thread and HAPPENS to get added by someone ELSE from their SAME TOWN #who by pure fucking CHANCE is ALSO playing pokemon go and looking for friends #i googled it there's only 42000 people in my broad region. the .......... smallness ! of the world!!!

[lavenoon]

Sometimes you try to prank-scare the new hire and eat dirt instead, but you made them laugh so all is well <3

#post let luce #dcamv #fnaf moon #my art #look I dont have a brace but my knee hurts like a bitch on any given day #so I simply Do Not Run. #fuck that noise #if Moon came swinging at me I'd *maybe* curl up on the floor in a pathetic pile #but most likely I'd just freeze #how are you gonna handle that ya menace; huh? #jester who likes to chase people meets person who Will Not Run and only be scared #he doesn't want them scared #and he also doesnt wanna collide and injure someone he's trying to befriend (in his own way) as a first meeting lmao #but yes okay enough rambles have fun enjoy <3

[p4nishers]

thinking abt how azi was truly crowley's sunlight through the millenniums. like, here's this demon who didn't mean to fall, who just asked questions and deep down he was still so good. and he is alone, he's the literally the emboidement of the first sin, and NOT by his own choosing. he's so alone and afraid and just wants a real conversation w someone, even if its an angel who'll most likely hate him. and here's the guardian of eden, who gave away his sword, that GOD gave to him, without asking a single question, to help the humans under his charge and he's kind to crowley and crowley is utterly fascinated. zira is basically the first protector, not only to adam and eve BUT CROWLEY TOO. he protects crowley from the first rain bc he's so fundamentally good and kind and crowley can't help seeking him out over the years. when they meet in rome, c is obviously far more withdrawn and angry bc of the things he's seen and was forced to do and there's az again, so happy to see him and even inviting him to dinner. everytime they met, even when crowley was saving azira, he also saved crowley by the simple act of being his friend.

#sunlight by hozier is literally this but with fancy words #no like UGH i don't know how to articulate this properly cause it's so much more than azi being kind to crowley. its being the only person #to see him. to truly know him and see thru the walls he built up and yes crowley may have been the one to seek him out and save him but #aziraphale LET him do it and never treated him with anything other than an equal and azi gave him a chance when nobody else did and UGHH #it most have meant so much to crowley after hell's cruelty #like i really do believe the simple fact that azi was unbashedly himself around him meant far more to crowley than empty kindness #EACH DAY YOU'D RISE W ME KNOW THAT I'D GLADLY BE THE ICARUS TO UR CERTAINTY OH MY SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT #STRAP A WING TO ME DEAD TRAP CLAD HAPPILY WITH WAX MELTED I'D MEET THE SEA UNDER SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT SUNLIGHT #ineffable husbands #good omens #good omens s2 #azicrow #good omens season 2 #aziraphale #crowley #hozier

[larapaulussen]

#gif #why do I have to spend every christmas and every birthday alone #for what am I being punished #I am a good person #and I don’t think this suffering has any sense #it’s just that in life the happy people have good things coming their way #and the sad people always just get more trauma #I know I could have a relationship if I didn’t have such a traumatic childhood #my trauma lets me reject the good guys and waste my time with the aholes #but i don’t know what to do about it #every nice guy I met absolutely wasn’t attractive to me #and we also didn’t have anything in common #so I’m not even regretting rejecting them cause it wouldn’t have worked out #and they deserve someone who actually fancies them #i just wonder why I never met a nice guy that I have common interests with #or who matched my preferences lookwise #it really feels like I’m simply not allowed to ever meet the right person #and gotten to the point where I swipe for hours have a lot of matches and then ghost everyone #as I just know it either will be someone nice but not attractive to me or an ahole #I just don’t have any energy left anymore #I just want to experience love so bad but can’t do these dates anymore #I’m so so tired

[longclawshilt]

As far as character progression goes, I'd argue that the most important aspect of the RLJ reveal isn't just Jon learning that he isn't Ned's son. The most important part is him learning that he isn't Ned Stark's bastard son. He's spent all his life chasing after Ned's shadow, trying to prove to himself and to the world that he is worthy of being Ned Stark's son, "let them say that Eddard Stark had fathered four sons not three", “he was not a Stark but he could die like one” and all that. He's internalized the shame of being the one stain on honorable Ned Starks' reputation

“But it’s a lie,” Jon insisted. How could they think his father was a traitor, had they all gone mad? Lord Eddard Stark would never dishonor himself … would he? He fathered a bastard, a small voice whispered inside him. Where was the honor in that? And your mother, what of her? He will not even speak her name.

So it's important for him to finally stop chasing after that elusive shadow. It's important for him to understand that Ned's dishonor was a deliberate choice that he made by himself, and it's thus no fault of his own. Once Jon internalizes that, then he can finally move on and ask himself, who am I? What do I want for myself? What can I be in this world, just as I am? So far, he's been unable to do that successfully because he still has an incomplete (and false) understanding of who he is.

#jon snow #asoiaf #valyrianscrolls #jon specifically being ned’s bastard cannot be overstated #it heavily colors his outlooks on his own life and how he navigates through the world #like let’s talk about his sex hangups for example #being ned's bastard is so so important to his character arc #ffs whenever he meets someone new it’s always you must be ned stark’s bastard #it’s how he and everyone else understand his role in life so for him to progress as a character we need to ask #what happens when jon is no longer ned stark’s bastard? #what happens when the one thing that drove him to the wall - to seek glory and kickstarted his heroic journey #is proven to be false? #what then? #what does he do then? where does he go then? who does he become then? #I think he will at first be resistant - and it’s been my personal theory that his learning of robb’s will #will coincide with that and that will be the greatest temptation for him #just like with stannis’ offer and how he agonized over it he will try to cling to some form of #-I can still be ned’s son can’t I? look robb legitimized me as such- #yes I think he’ll already be aware of his parentage by the time he learns of the will #but ultimately he will choose to forge his own path in the end just like he chose to remain with the nw #which then doesn’t look good for the kitn prospects I’m ngl 😬 #because just like accepting Stannis’ offer meant desecrating his father’s gods #accepting the will while knowing that he has no right over his now cousins would straight up be usurpation regardless of age or skill #and I can see grrm throwing in that moral dilemma for Jon because his arc is full of them #but just as he rejected stannis and ended up as lc then his final rejection will lead to something else that is greater - king of winter �� #Just my opinion tho 🙂 #tagging #eddard stark #r plus l equals j #As well

[elvisqueso]

Love me, love my raccoon [Part 3/3]:

—Meeko's new favorite human <3

#john smith is the 'your pet likes me more :)' kind of boyfriend #pocahontas (1995) #pocahontasedit #john smith #meeko #pocahontas #disneyedit #love me love my racoon* #love me love my raccoon* #i'm exaggerating only a lil bit #but john and meeko's immediate attachment to each other is something that can be So Personal #i've mentioned this before but meeko is the literal first character john actually initiates a genuine interaction with #his first real conversation in the film is with this lil racoon who he gives treats to #and that's also the thing about him that endears him to pocahontas before they properly meet #like here's this strange dude being nice to her pet racoon for no reason other than he just is Like That #they're relationship is so important to me like i am so obsessed with the way meeko represents how john engages with nature #very indulgent and curious and genuine (even when meeko does something he doesn't like) #the way he lets meeko just hitch a ride and how meeko perks up whenever his new favorite human is around is justtt #i didnt gif it bc i couldnt get it to flow the way i wanted but also how meeko backs him up during the confrontation at the settlement! #ahhhh the way meeko REMEMBERS THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE COMPASS HE TOOK and is an essential part in saving john's life!!!! #i am so obsessed with this like u gotta understand #they are Besties! #queso*gifs #queso*edit #i'm not as satisfied with this gifset as i am with the other two #but it just will have to do

[naturecalls111]

on liking girls

#comic #vent art #other fandoms #the fandom is my personal life LMAO #I had posted this on twitter and deleted it because it was vent art from back in like. Ohhh I forget. Must have been january #Like I had just had my birthday and I don't know what it was but something made me realise like #oh. I haven't come out to my parents #like it's Been a minute I probably should right #and my parents are like. the best in the world I say that with my whole chest #my sexuality is not something they would ever care about let alone judge me for #like they have so many gay friends OBJECTIVELY I KNOW THIS IS A NON ISSUE LOL #but I don't know. something about it DOES feel dangerous and I can barely come to terms with it #I hate the idea of making it a "thing'. does that make sense #i don't want it to be a “thing” #I don't want them to tell me they'll love me no matter what and that this doesn't change anything #I don't want to have to subject them to feel like I'm “opening up” and then Have to respond like that #I wish it felt like as natural of an integration as someone is being straight you know #i wish it was: i come home with the prettiest girl in the world (she is the prettiest because she is my girlfriend) and they're just like #“hi! so nice to meet you! lets sit for tea!” #and thats it no questions asked. my mom or dad wouldn't ask “why didnt you tell us?” does that make sense #This is why none of my highschool friends know either #i'll tell them if they ask but I don't want to make a performance of Telling Them #I don't. Owe them that #I don't owe anyone a heads up. I don't want to. I don't want to make it A Thing #It's a Me thing. I don't get why it has to be turned into a You thing. #also hi if you havent seen my face i look like That LOL

[sapphicseasapphire]

Hello everyone! This is a bit of a different post, but I’m going to try something… and hope it doesn’t blow up in my face.

For one more hour, (it is currently 11 pm at the time I’m writing this), it is my birthday. As a gift to you, I’m going to open myself up to Cryptid au art requests! If you have any prompts you want to see drawn out, shoot me an ask and if I like it, I’ll draw it!

I’ve had a bit of a rough day, to say the least, so I will probably go right to bed after posting this haha. I’d love some good fluff to draw tomorrow while I procrastinate in class. Please, when/if you send requests, be mindful. Depending on how many requests I get, I might not get around to drawing them all. And I won’t draw them if they’re inappropriate. I will be accepting requests until tomorrow night!

Anyway! Please give me silly little prompts to draw my Little Guys. Lil sketches to heal the soul. And have a great night/day!

#I’m trying something new please go easy on me #very long day #let me draw my Cryptids in peace #valentines day is so hard for the aro/ace person who’s birthday is also on valentines day #give me art requests #let me fall to escapism #my little guys give me life #links meet au

[hersurvival]

"You hold such high opinions of me, that I do not deserve.. I only hope you're not afraid of monsters."

You're scared you might not live up to my expectations, you worry that I've placed you on the highest pedestal, that I've created an image, an idealized version of you in my mind.

But I have never expect you to be anything more than exactly who you are in each and every precise second of time.

And I want you all the same, what you call beautiful and what you say is ugly.

I want you when you're lying awake alone at night, crying to the stars, when you are hopeless, crumpled on the bathroom floor.

I want your damage, your undoing, your violence.

No less than I want your good.

Your dancing and laughing in the kitchen as you wash the dishes, the carefree way you giggle as you whisper to me little secrets.

Your confidence, your gentle touch, your kindness.

I have seen your duality, I assure you, you're no worse a person than me.

The way I would be compelled to kiss you - how I have spent every waking, dreaming breath wondering how your lips would feel against mine.

And you'd let it happen, at least for a moment, just to know what it was like.

#romance #love #love poem #lovesick #little girl crush #writing #poets on tumblr #poem #poetry #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #spilled poem #spilled writing #original writing #personal poem #give me your all #your fire and your ice #your love and your hatred #let me be your grey #we will meet somewhere in the middle #my dearly beloved #flame

[ash-and-starlight]

.

#alright re: last reblog #first of all zuko is a massive bitch and i love him so much #second u know he was just like there is One person in the world that katara wants to murder more than me so let’s do that #so she can let it out And spare my ass <3 #tHIRD ppl it’s not really surprising that zuzu is pro murder like #boy was supposed to inherit an imperialist empire and keep up an imperialist war #idk if ozai was the only one able to get the throne without going to battle once but iroh and lu ten were generals. led armies. #zuko was Fully prepared to take on that role too (see: the fateful war meeting) #he’s been raised with the yeah murder is a thing that you’ll have to do mindset #like he’s not a killer but he Would do it if the circumstances called for it #(sokka parallel btw) #does it make sense? #also like #he fully says that if he wasn’t such a firm believer in destiny he Could and Would have killed ozai on the day of the black sun #he says it to his face #this would be a fun au actually lmao like. the gaang bursting into the room and there’s just zuko there #next to ozai’s lightning fried corpse #like hello 🧍🏻‍♂️👋🏼 zuko here 😬🔥 #and has to convince everyone he’s good and friendly now this is not an evil plan 🫶🏼 #last thing but this reminds me #WHERE is that post that was like #sokka finds out zuko could have ended the war the day of the black sun but didn’t and just throttles him #<333 #if you read all this ty i’m sorry i’m kissing u #send post

[little-pondhead]

As a bonding trip, Jazz and her new little sister Ellie go to Hawaii for vacation. There, they meet another pair of sisters, Nani and Lilo, as well as their perfectly normal dog, Stitch.

And luckily for the Pelekai sisters, the Fentons have a lot of experience messing with multiple forms of government. :)

#pondhead blurbs #danny phantom #lilo and stitch #danny phantom crossover #nani: this is our…dog #jazz: yeah that checks out #lilo: I gotta give this fish a peanut butter sandwich every Thursday #Ellie: cool does he like chips? #stitch: *randomly grows and crawls on the ceiling* #both Fentons: aha yeah that’s just how dogs are. you should meet Cujo #Captain Gantu: *pulls out a massive gun* surrender or face the consequences #jazz: *pulls out a BIGGER gun* try me motherfucker #jazz: I already have to deal with one government trying to take away my dog I’m not letting it happen to my new friends #nani: I am the only sane person here #the two exchange numbers so they can bitch to each other about raising their younger siblings

[friend-crow]

This library printing thing is breaking my mind.

They list no restrictions on the types of content you can print. Just a long list of allowed file types.

It's free. Up to 100 pages per day. Per day.

You don't even need a library card.

#they also don't do late fees and have been letting me plod my way through this novel since last November #they also ALSO have free meeting rooms which is where I first met the in-person animist/folk magic group #which is how I met the person who let me hold the book #bow down before the Multnomah county library

[welcometoteyvat]

the only thing i took away from hsr 2.1 is that march is gay

#who is this bartender and can she become playable she deserves a full on the mouth kiss #hsr spoilers #hsr #also aven meeting his younger self is cute tho i still havent gotten to the part where they explain who tf is speaking thru his future self #but i actually hate how the game pushes you to keep pulling for newer units oh my god like i dont wanna do dot damage stop making your boss #bosses able to be oneshotted by black swan acheron kafka and nobody else #pov person who hasnt progressed through aven boss fight because it's taking way too damn long. prolly a skill issue but just let me play #my fav characters i dont need this fucking powercreep stuff T_T #ramblings! #also aven is growing on me but also idc his design is too dripless and so is boothill's im like -_- #the only pretty people are robin and siobhan the bartender and im so sick of physical.............. #also i tghink this is just a side effect of being way more invested in genshin bc i cannot fully pay attention to the lore tm #they be revealing things left and right and i just dont care so it flies over my head #at least they properly gave everything needed to understand avens backstory before we have to fight him

[oatbugs]

pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me! #LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️ #but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

[bubblesxo]

the first time de-aged!bruce mentions harvey the batfam give him blank stares. he, as one does, immediately assumes the worst and asks alfred if he's dead. alfred is like ?? no he got married, retired, and moved far, far away from gotham lol. bruce is immediately flabbergasted as to why he has never introduced his children to his Uncle Harvey, promises to introduce them, and promptly tells them many unhinged stories.

the batfam don't quite know if they /want/ to meet him

#the batfam being lowkey scared of bruce's past is just so funny to me #harvey canonically calls himself Uncle Harvey therefore so will bruce (jokingly) #in person he calls him Detective Bullock #when jim finds out abt Uncle Harvey he immediately tells him and harvey makes fun of him but lets him do it anyway #(the kid grew on him okay?) #i love harvey he's a great character #as a parallel to jim at the beginning of the show to his partner?? #great #amazing #fantabulous #anyways time for tags #g!bruce meets batfam #my au #my fic #gotham tv #gotham #gotham tv show #gotham tv series #gotham!bruce #batman #bruce wayne #gotham!batman #gotham!bruce wayne #tv: gotham #gotham 2014 #harvey bullock #jim gordon #alfred pennyworth #batfamily #batfam

[chubs-deuce]

I've had ENOUGH of this dude

#aka I thought back to Zelda's pre-calamity home life situation and it keeps striking one hell of a chord with me #probably bc I only got diagnosed with ADHD at 17 #and have until that point suffered pretty similar accusations of not trying hard enough or not caring enough to meet certain expectations #despite already trying my damn hardest not yet knowing it's nothing I have any immediate control over #and in my mind Link's strong sense of justice paired with being Zelda's personal knight and generally being very perceptive #lets him see the full extend of unfair bullshit repeatedly unfolding before him and occasionally ponders the pros and cons of treason #botw #loz botw #digital fanart #my art #art #fanart #breath of the wild #shitpost #sort of