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beauty-and-passion · 3 years

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What Eurovision 2021 taught us

1. That a nice, enjoyable show was possible (even if 4 presenters are still too much)

Of course nothing can beat Love Love Peace Peace (even if Ja Ja Ding Dong does its best), but this year's intermissions were very enjoyable.

We expected something flashy and over the top because hey, The Netherlands. Sex, drugs, gays and all that jazz.

But instead Covid surprised us. And then The Netherlands surprised us even more, by making a very enjoyable show, despite the restrictions. My personal favourites were:

The water intermission of the first semi-final. I loved the mixed feelings, how water is both scary and respected, for being such a powerful, unstoppable force.

The rooftop concerts during the final. Social distancing? Sure, no problem, let's make the past winners sing on top of some roofs all over Rotterdam. That was pure genius, I loved it so much.

On the other hand, the presenters were basically all useless. We could've had just two of them instead of four. But hey, at least they weren't as cringy as the three scary ukranians from 2017 or the useless four ladies from Portugal. The true highlights of the show were the intermissions, the guests and especially the songs themselves and this is perfectly good for me.

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2. That we can live in a world without boring ass ballads

I’ve never been so proud of the Eurovision public, especially during the second semifinal: that evening was PACKED with ballads. Boring ballad after boring ballad, with just a couple more funny songs in between.

The ballads were all left behind. Even the two Amen. And I love the irony we chose El Diablo and the finnish band for the final, but no Amen. No saints allowed, only the norwegian angel. As it always should be.

And so we had the best final I've seen since I started following Eurovision in 2014. Catchy songs, dance songs, upbeat songs. And power ballads. Yes, ballads can still have a place, but only if they're good.

Because yes, Switzerland and France were good. Very good. Just not as good as the ones the public wanted.

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3. That we want Eurovision, not Englishvision

Every year, the same message blasts from all Europeans: send a song in your native language. This show is supposed to make other people from Europe (and the rest of the world) to know more about your own country, to enjoy its rhythm and to listen to something we don't usually hear. So why waste this huge opportunity, to bring a generic song in English?

Because the English song wins. Because we all understand English, so English has more chances.

Flash news: GUESS WHO WON THIS YEAR. No, it’s not the generic English song.

The public has been crystal clear, the final poll is even clearer: the top five includes an italian song, an ukraine song, two french songs and only one english song. We want different styles and rhythms, we want to listen to Europe.

So I want to give my full thank you to:

Albania: amazing song, great voice, wonderful language. Do it again.

Serbia: these ladies are fantastic, their song is great and they sang it in their language so I love them

Switzerland: thank you for leaving English to the side to give us some good french

Spain: the song wasn't as good as Universo, but it was in sexy spanish, so thank you for using it almost every year

Danemark: the song was terrible, but it was in your language and this alone deserves everything

France: I know we all make fun of you for being France, but your language is perfect for songs, so thank you for always using it

Ukraine: take note, Ukraine, because Europe is madly in love with your language and your rhythm

Italy: our language is beautiful, so thank you for delivering every year

While my biggest biases go to:

Greece: a generic pop song with no balkan rhythm and no greek either? An absolute shame, greek should always be used for songs.

Russia: russian language is very melodious and yes, we got something this year, but what about bringing a full russian song? We want it!

Germany: I may sound crazy, but I honestly think german language is good for songs. It's not like the mediterranean languages, but it still works. So please, do not be scared and show what you can do with it!

Scandinavian countries: why do you never want to bring your own language? Do it, don't be scared! Yes, Sweden, I'm talking with you: you still never tried to bring something in swedish, so do it.

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4. That we don't want Americans to play with us

For reasons we still have to understand, Flo Rida was competing this year. And he was competing for San Marino, the smallest European country.

I'm pretty sure they took some time to explain to him what was going on, where he was, where San Marino is, wtf was happening, why there were sexy italians and ukranian witches and a norwegian angel and loads of beautiful women everywhere.

And I loved how we all send memes about this, about ahahah why is Flo Rida here, what if San Marino wins where would they host Eurovision, all while enjoying an actual catchy song.

And then, in the end, Flo Rida basically disappeared. Who remembers Flo Rida, when we got Ukraine, Italy, Finland, Iceland, and the UK? And Germany being wholesome? And the love story between Norway and Azerbaijan? We collectively forgot about him and I think it's very sexy from Europe to just say "nope" and push America away, even if for just one week.

And this isn't the first time: we basically showed Madonna in a corner in 2019, thanks to Mans, Eleni, Verka and Conchita. Once again, Europeans knows what they want: we don't want Americans. Australia can because they're like that little brother we took under our wing for no reason and now it's part of us. But not Americans.

The rest of the year is all yours, but one week is ours.

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5. That we can lose like bosses

This year, the voting results have been absolutely insane and FOUR COUNTRIES got zero points from the public, while the UK got both zero points from the public AND the jury.

Don't get me wrong, the song was bad. And yes, Brexit played a role in this. And yes, hating England is Europe’s favourite sport.

But can we please all take a moment and appreciate how James Newman reacted? The public gave him a round of applause and he celebrated this achievement like a boss.

And he had all the reasons! He achieved something incredible, he unlocked something that this new voting system was supposed to never lead to. But he did it. So hats off to you, my boy: My Last Breath was better.

Germany is also used to the bottom of the chart, but this year I really thought Jendrik could have a chance to achieve a higher position. The song was funny, carefree, lively, the hand costume was the kind of trash we need and the message was nice as well. But he still got 3 points.

Despite that, Jendrik celebrated like a maniac and seeing his this happy made me happy as well. I really wish him the best.

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6. That FUCK YOU JURY

Again, same message every year: the jury vote should be eliminated. It's a fucking farce and their votes have nothing to do with what the public want.

The jury focuses on the voices, except when they don't, and clearly giving points to your neighbours is because you like the song, not because they're your neighbours.

I usually make fun of Greece and Cyprus showing eternal love to each other, by giving 12 points to each other every year, but this time, it sounded even more stupid than usual. It really looked like a farce. Why should we see this farce? Why can't we just choose what the public wants? So at least we would blame ourselves for our shitty musical tastes.

Even if I'm pretty sure we all have great musical tastes. Let's not forget that in 2019 the public's winner was Norway, with a song that mixed english, a catchy rhythm and an amazing part in yoik language. Arcade is good as well, but we cannot deny the norwegian entry was a lot more interesting.

And this year, the public's taste was flawless:

Look at this beauty: italian glam rock, ukranian techno folk, french powerful ballad, finnish hard rock and whatever that thing was with Iceland.

There's variety, there's everything for everyone. And there are native languages. Italian, Ukranian, and French on top three, followed by English.

Moral of the story: the public is great and the jury should be abolished forever.

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7. That Ukranian technofolk is all we needed in our lives

I didn’t see enough love for Go_A, so as italian, I think it's my sworn duty to give my appreciation to them and their amazing entry, because this band is awesome and Shum is currently on top of the Spotify top 50 - as it should be, because everyone should listen to it and join this slavic rave party.

I already liked their entry for 2020, Solovey. But I also liked My Last Breath from the UK and Universo from Spain. And this year they brought two of the worst songs. So I was very wary of Go_A.

But Shum is an absolute blast. Katerina Pavlenko's voice is unique and the song is even more, because based on ukranian folklore and traditional dances to summon the spirit of spring. They managed to teach something to all Europe in a three minute song and I think that’s incredibly sexy of them.

And so, I searched for other songs and OMG, I don’t know how it’s possible, but they are all great. Rano-Ranenko, Zhalmenina, Tanula, they all are perfect and I’m in love with this band.

And if all of this is not enough, THEY DID A COVER OF DANCING LASHA TUMBAI. The most iconic Eurovision song, sang by our god Verka. And this is the coolest, most badass cover ever in the whole universe. Please listen to it HERE everyone needs to hear this.

So thank you, Ukraine, for giving us Go_A. We all had a small empty place in our hearts and this place has ben perfectly filled by them.

And yif you think you don’t need ukranian technofolk, is only because you still haven’t listened to it. Please listen and enjoy Shum. You’re welcome.

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8. That rock and roll never dies (and Italy’s well deserved victory)

The last time Italy won was in 19-fucking-90. 31 years ago. I was just born.

And now, they finally won again. And what a song! Despite being italian, I've never listened to Maneskin before, but oh damn, this song is good. Not all their songs are, but this one is. And also Morirò da re.

Their show was perfect as well. This post is really eye-opening about how well they put on their show. The use of the stage, the movements, everything has been part of a great performance, even their clothes. Damiano's voice never faltered, despite having an entire continent watching him. They handled the stage like bosses, despite being only in their twenties. And they gave us some good fucking rock.

And so the public said a loud "FUCK YOU" to the jury and chose its winners. The sassy, sexy italians.

And yes, I know that there has been a lot of petty polemics because those youngsters are having drugs!1!! as if they were a bunch of idiots who used drugs on international TV, with their manager sitting next to them.

Of course it was a pointless accusation and honestly I don't care if some people are sore losers. The drug results were negative anyway, what a shocker.

What we should truly think about is how strong the Maneskin's bladders are, because they spent the whole evening of the final drinking the entire alcohol supply of the Eurovision and, at the end, they were still happy and cool. Hats off to you, you sexy people.

This man is just iconic, why did I miss him before.

Also, have some more Maneskin. You know, as a treat.

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9. That solidarity and wholesomeness are the biggest winners

It's just beautiful to see these nice people, from all over Europe, bonding, having fun, taking photos together and being friends.

The true winner of this, is probably Norway: Tix wanted to have a good time and he had a good time. The video of him vibing with Ukraine and Germany while listening Hard Rock Hallelujah is the best (HERE). His love story with Efendi from Azerbaijan is even better (please, check the video on his youtube channel, it's hilarious). I don't like his song, but he's a great guy and deserves everything.

The italian and finnish rock relationship is also great. Maneskin and Dark Sides found each other, considering they were the only two rock bands in the competition, so mutual appreciation was inevitable.

But Damiano is also a man of culture and he appreciates Ukraine's entry. And Ukraine appreciates both Finland and Italy. Is this what world peace looks like? Because I love it.

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10. That Italians will be Europe's clowns again (and you're all allowed to make fun of us)

Beware, Europe: we Italians are messy and chaotic, our presenters don’t know a single word in English, we are homoerotic AND homophobic at the same time, our musical competitions are so fucking sloooow... let’s say next year’s Eurovision is going to be interesting.

And yes, you’re allowed to make fun of us. We don’t care, we won, so we deserve to be Europe’s clowns once again.

And I don’t know who the presenters will be (my bets are on everyone’s favourites: Fiorello, Amadeus and Malgioglio), I don’t know how we will ridicule ourselves once again, I don’t know where will we find the money to put on the show, I don’t know how ungodly long it will be... but I know that Mans Zelmerlow will be part of it. This man loves Eurovision just like all of us, so I can already see him packing his suitcase and planning his flight to Italy. Come to us, Mans, we will wait for you. We actually need an English presenter, so if you have nothing else to do...

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alsaurus-loves-dean · 3 years

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What Dean Has To Say a destiel fic by alsaurus | rating: T | word count: 3.8k When Cas comes back, he disappears.

He’s supposedly still in the bunker. According to Sam, he doesn’t seem to have left the building at all since he arrived.

Dean wouldn’t know, because Cas is avoiding him.

It’s the only explanation. Why else would it be impossible to find his best friend even though they’re under the same roof 24/7? Not that Dean has really gone looking for him, but still. They haven’t crossed paths once since Cas got back three days ago. This wouldn’t be so weird on its own (yes it would), except Sam sees Cas all the time. So what gives?

Dean knows what gives, but at the same time? He doesn’t really. Cas is obviously reluctant to talk to Dean after what he’d said to trigger his deal with the Empty. He’d said all that under the assumption that he’d never have to face a response. Dean understands. He would definitely feel the same if he were in that position. But Cas? Cas is the bravest, purest, and most sincere person that Dean has ever met. How could someone like that be afraid to talk to someone like Dean?

This isn’t how Dean had expected this to go.

He’d wanted Cas back more than anything he’s ever wanted in his life. He’d never felt joy the way he felt when he saw Cas out of the Empty, back in the bunker where he belonged. Dean knew he needed to be with Cas, that Cas was it for him.

But he’d also kind of assumed that Cas would take the lead, here. Cas, who was so straightforward and free of human insecurities, would be the one to bring it up - if only just to assure Dean that nothing had to change. Then Dean would have the perfect opening to tell him he felt the same. If words failed him in that moment, Dean was also prepared to let his body do some of the talking.

Dean had not imagined that Cas would just straight-up hide from him for days on end. It’s frustrating, but also a little endearing.

Okay, it’s a lot endearing. Very endearing. Some might even say it’s adorable. Not Dean, though. Sure, Cas is so flustered at the idea of talking to Dean about his feelings that he literally won’t show his stupid angel face - so what? What’s even cute about that?

Anyway.

Dean is starting to get antsy about the whole thing. He’s not exactly anxious, but he’s so amped up that his body interprets it as anxiety. He had to cut down on the caffeine because he’d started to feel like he was vibrating out of his skin. For someone Dean never sees, Cas sure does occupy a whole lot of space in Dean’s head most of the time. He finds it difficult to really focus on anything else, so he’s watched a LOT of movies the past few days - just zoning out with only half his attention on the screen.

“Why are you sitting here in the dark by yourself?” Sam asks from the doorway, making Dean jolt in surprise.

Dean hadn’t realized he’d turned the TV off after Dirty Dancing had ended. He really is just sitting in the Dean Cave, in the dark, by himself. Awesome.

“What‘s it to you? And who am I supposed to be sitting with, anyway? Not like Cas wants anything to do with me,” Dean grumbles. Laying it on just a little thick, since he knows better than Sam why Cas isn’t here.

“What is up with you two, anyway?” Sam asks, and it’s obvious that he’s been waiting for the opportunity to do so. He flips the light switch and comes to sit in the other chair. He’s perched on the edge of it, leaning towards Dean as if to signify how very important he finds this conversation. How he’s not going to let Dean out of it.

Fine.

“Cas is just being a baby. He thinks he can just confess his undying love for me and peace out, and then once I rescue his ass he can just avoid dealing with the whole thing,” Dean starts. Then he finds he doesn’t want to stop, despite Sam’s eyes going wide in shock. “Seriously, man, I don’t know how much longer I can take this. Like how long am I supposed to wait? We should have spent these whole three days in bed doing all kinds of freaky shit - but look at me, Sam! I’m sitting alone in the dark without even realizing it because the dude lives rent free in my freakin’ head!”

“Umm,” Sam says.

“I get that he’s nervous, but so am I! I mean, he’s the one whose cards are already on the table. I’m the one who has shit to say! I don’t even know if I’ll be able to say it, but I’ll never find out if I never even see the guy!”

“Okay, hold on. Just a minute. You’re saying that Cas told you...?”

“Yeah.”

“That he - “

“Yep.”

“And you want to say it back.”

“Sure. If you wanna call it that.”

“Come on, Dean.”

“I mean yeah, Sam, what do you want me to say? I have no idea how it’ll go down. I still haven’t seen him since we got him back.”

Sam starts to smile, and Dean doesn’t like the look of that.

“So what, he’s avoiding you because he’s scared of what you’ll say?” Sam asks.

Dean shrugs.

“I guess. Why else would he avoid me and not you?”

Sam’s smile grows as he sits back in the chair, settling in. He watches Dean for a few moments, eyes twinkling like he’s about to say something really stupid. Why did Dean think that opening up about this would be a good idea?

“That’s actually kind of cute,” Sam says.

Dean rolls his eyes so hard he has to throw his head against the back of the chair.

“Don’t you start with that!” Dean groans. “It’s not cute, it’s annoying. It’s cowardice, is what it is!”

“Have you tried to find him?” Sam asks. The smirk on his face tells Dean he knows the answer but is asking just to be a little bitch.

“Shut up. Why does it have to be me, huh? Why do I have to be the one to bring it up?”

“I didn’t say you had to bring anything up. I just mean have you tried to talk to him at ALL? You say you haven’t seen him, but have you looked for him?”

Dean has not. But -

“I already looked for him, in the Empty! And I pulled him out. It was a whole thing! I think the ball’s in his court now.”

“Dean, think about it. You have a lot more experience with this kind of thing than he does,” Sam reasons.

It’s true. But at the same time -

“I have never experienced anything like this. Ever. Especially not with a dude,” Dean says. He feels out of his element, too. That’s why Cas was supposed to take charge! (Dean knows that doesn’t make sense, and he doesn’t care).

The smile on Sam’s face turns gentler, any trace of teasing disappearing.

“I’m surprised you’re even telling me all this,” Sam says.

“Sam, come on,” Dean protests, because he really doesn’t want to get into it.

“No, really! In the past you’ve been… very adamant about being straight.” Too adamant, is what Sam means. He’s not wrong.

“What’s your point?” Dean asks.

“I’m just glad this is happening, I guess.”

Dean can’t help but melt a little at that sentiment. Inwardly. On the outside, he’s still trying to act put out, but the longer he sits there trying not to confide in Sam, the stronger the pull to do so becomes. Like being caught in a wave, Dean finally lets it pour through him.

“It’s Cas. You know? It’s Cas. I spent too long worrying about all that. I’ve lost him too many times, Sam. I can’t really care about all that stuff anymore. So I just want him to know, you know? I don’t want my crap to keep Cas from getting what he wants. He deserves to get everything he wants. He can have it. I want him to have it. And I want him to know that.” Dean stops. Takes a deep breath, because that was a lot. Then he wraps it up. “And that means you’re gonna have to know at some point anyway, so. There you go.”

Sam looks shocked again, but in a totally different way that Dean doesn’t recognize at all. Which makes sense, considering this is the first time Dean’s ever admitted to having gay feelings for an angel of the Lord. It’s an unusual situation.

“That’s amazing, Dean. Seriously. I’m really, really happy for you,” Sam finally says.

Dean can tell he means it. He’s actually not sure he’s ever seen Sam so sincerely pleased. But Dean frowns at that last sentence.

“I don’t know what you have to be happy about just yet. Dude won’t even talk to me.”

“You said yourself that you haven’t even tried!”

“Yeah but I can take a hint, man. He doesn’t want to see me. Otherwise he’d have seen me.”

And it boils down to that, Dean realizes. Because while he understands that Cas is reluctant because he’s afraid, Dean is also hurt. It’s irrational, but he wants Cas’ love for him to be stronger than that fear. He aches for Cas every moment of every day and every night. He’s barely functioning because he feels like his entire existence is on pause - he hadn’t expected to be in this prolonged state of limbo. He’d been ready for Cas. But it turns out he’d been ready for a different Cas, one he’d thought up in his head - because the real Cas, the Cas he loves, is too afraid to face him and Dean has no idea how long that’ll last. He has no idea when or even if Cas will come to him. Every moment that passes could be the moment before Cas finally talks to him. It’s agony. It’s wonderful.

But he meant it when he said that Cas deserves everything he wants. So why should Cas have to seek it out, when Dean could just give it to him?

“I need to find him, huh,” Dean says, and it’s not a question.

“Yeah, man. You should do that,” Sam agrees. There isn’t an ounce of admonishment in his voice. He’s just supporting Dean, and for once, Dean is grateful.

“Thanks, Sammy,” he says,

Time to find the angel.

concluded in chapter 2. read the rest on ao3.

#destiel #deancas #destiel fic #deancas fic #fanfic #destiel fanfic #deancas fanfic #my fic #dean winchester butterfly hunter #butterfly hunter

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simonsrosebud · 3 years

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the one where someone doesn’t know who kevin day is, pt. 2

part one three four five

dalton’s apartment becomes a common occurrence over the next month. kevin kisses dalton into the couch cushions, and then the bed. and this one time it’s almost the same, except dalton interrupts. “oh, hey, i’ll be at your game tomorrow- ah,” he breathes as kevin kisses down his neck.

kevin doesn’t like that. no- he likes that, that dalton is willing to see him do what he loves and all, but not that he told him right now. because now he has to stop what he’s doing and explain. explain that he’s pretty fucking famous in the exy world, that his mother is the creator of the sport, that he’s kevin day- what that entails.

but dalton takes it surprisingly easily. he thinks it’s because he’s not invested in the sport in the way almost everyone else kevin knows is and just doesn’t get it, or maybe because he actually likes kevin for kevin and just doesn’t care about his past and the weight of his name.

because after kevin’s done dalton kisses away his frown and climbs onto his lap. “don’t worry, hot shot, you’re still just a history nerd to me.”

kevin upgrades dalton and his friend to his family seats. his friend seems to know exactly who he is when he goes up to them before warm ups, and by the guys face kevin realizes that dalton definitely didn’t tell his friend who they’d come for.

kevin hugs dalton. “i’m not out yet,” he whispers. “otherwise i’d kiss you.”

dalton grins like a child. “later.” he shrugs.

andrew mocks him in the car to fox tower after their win. “invite your boyfriend?” and he freezes. “fuck you for thinking i’m an idiot.”

kevin thanks god that nicky rode with matt. aaron and neil both look at him, though. “you’re dating someone?” neil will never not be oblivious. aaron just sneers.

kevin stays quiet. he should’ve known better from andrew, after all. but he pulls out his phone. come pick me up?

be there in 30, we're walking home from the stadium LOL

it's enough time to go hang out with the rest of the team and the vixens in the lounge, dan would kill him if he didn't show at all. but he must lose track of time because eventually the door opens and instead of another fox it's dalton. it's not enough to pause conversations, even though kevin is sure they all at least notice.

when kevin follows him out dalton knocks shoulders with his and smiles. “are you drunk? i noticed they were drinking.”

“no. i’m um, i’m-i’m four months... sober.”

dalton is a pure angel because he smiles at kevin as he drives. “that’s good, kev, i’m proud of you for that.” and he doesn’t make him explain, or ask questions. he takes it at face and lets it go, and it makes kevin want to bask in the feeling he gets from it. it’s a different kind of trust than he’s used to.

he texts andrew that he’s not coming home for the night. as soon as they get inside dalton’s place he has his lips on kevin’s. “looked really hot tonight,” he mumbles and lets kevin walk him backwards towards his room. “wish you still had your uniform on. so strong,” and squeals when kevin picks him up.

“stop talking, d”

the next morning dalton drops him off at the stadium for training. he doesn’t see anyone else there, so he lets dalton grab his face and kiss him before climbing out with a smile.

it fades when he sees nicky and allison staring at him as they exit the stadium. he forgot it was therapy week for the team.

kevin freezes up. nicky’s grinning, and allison continues walking to her car. “wait!” nicky wiggles his eyebrows when kevin grabs his arm. “for once in your life, nicky, please don’t tell anyone.”

and it’s weird, because nicky kind of loses his smile. “are you gay? or bisexual?”

shrug. “second.”

“are you serious about not telling people? you’re obviously not out yet.” kevin nods, and nicky smiles. “i won’t tell. i can keep secrets, you know, when they matter.”

kevin looks to allison, who looks to nicky. “we’ve all noticed you hanging out with that guy lately. if a bet about you two boning comes up we’re splitting the pot.” nicky nods. “secrets safe with me, then.”

kevin doesn’t tell them that andrew and neil know. allison’s stubborn and he’s lucky he got her to keep her mouth shut on the first try.

he’s still moody during practice, though. on their way back, andrew drives right past fox tower and to dalton’s apartment. kevin doesn’t even realize until the car stops. “what are-“

“get out. you’re not allowed back until your mood is gone.” and kevin could just walk back. it’s only a fifteen minute walk, honestly, but he doesn’t really want to. he wants dalton to wrap his body around him so he can take a nap and he wants to just hug him. he’s realized over time that he’s been incredibly touch starved, and he’s become a fan of bear hugs.

he could feel himself distracted during practice, worrying himself over if he should tell the public that he’s bi to get ahead of it and worrying over what he and dalton are. if it’s going in a direction that would even give him reason to come out.

so when dalton lets him in with a smile at the unexpected visit, kevin kind of falls into his arms and hugs him. “can you hold me.” it’s a different type of vulnerability, but dalton takes it with grace.

and eventually, when dalton’s lying on him with a hand in his hair, he asks, “do you wanna be my boyfriend?”

kevin snaps his head to look at him. he runs his hand up dalton’s bare back. “i’ve never been in a real relationship before. my last one... she was toxic for me.” triggering would be more accurate.

“that’s okay,” he whispers, his hand slides down to kevin’s face and he drags his thumb down his lip. “just want you, kev.”

it’s the first time he thinks he’s ever heard something along those lines, and it hits so deep. he rolls over dalton and kisses him into the mattress.

the foxes have a field day with it.

kevin doesn’t tell them, but he realizes two weeks later that allison was right when she guessed about them starting bets, and it doesn’t help when kevin brings dalton back to the suite only to find the upperclassmen and cousins all spread out on the couches and floor- minus renee and aaron. he freezes and starts to walk backwards but andrew steps in front of him. “stay.”

“why.” but andrew doesn’t answer because he’s already said his piece, and kevin almost ignores him until neil pulls the vice captain card and forces him to stay.

kevin wants to hit him.

“it’s fine, kev,” dalton practically pulls him to the group. dan greets him first and introduces herself. “we’re playing never have i ever, drinking edition, if you wanna play, but you’ve got to drink for kevin, too”

and dalton’s wanted kevin’s friends to like him ever since he first saw them, so he doesn’t really want to say no.

“this is a bad idea. they don’t play nice,” kevin says to dalton. and he’s right. the foxes don’t really play the game right, and all they do is go for each other.

kevin starts.

never have i ever payed a guy to knock me out: neil takes a drink with murder in his eyes. andrew’s behind him and flicks the back of his head. he isn’t playing, but he’s not letting neil get wasted without being close by. and also, he kind of lives there.

never have i ever gone to a peaceful exy banquet: no one drinks, and for some reason it makes them all burst into laughter.

never have i ever done cracker dust: dan says that one with a drunk pointed look. the cousins, neil, and dalton for kevin all drink.

never have i ever had a panic attack over getting a phone: neil

never have i ever kissed the same gender: neil, nicky, allison, dalton takes two swigs.

never have i ever dated someone outside of exy: nicky and dalton for kevin.

never have i ever broken a bone: kevin, matt, aaron

broken a hand: kevin

witnessed kevin having a meltdown: everyone

lived with my dad for two years without telling him he was my dad: kevin shoots daggers at allison. dalton drinks for him.

had to get shitfaced to get a tattoo: kevin

sent neil to west virginia: kevin

seen kevin’s real smile: dalton, neil

dated kevin: dalton. it settles a few bets all at once.

given kevin a blowjob: dalton laughs before taking a drink, but that’s the last straw for kevin. he’s sober as all hell and not letting them take the piss out of him and dalton like this. “we’re leaving.” he pulls dalton up.

dalton has an arm around his shoulders and his head ducked by kevin’s. “s’fun, hm?”

kevin’s not having it. it was not fun and he had reasons he didn’t want dalton meeting the foxes yet and the whole thing was fucked over because neil pulled the VC card and dalton was too nice to decline it.

neil says, in french. “you knew he’d find out at some point”

kevin is furious. “none of you had the right pulling the shit you did tonight. i’ll fucking kill you.” and he grabs dalton by the waist to escort him out.

all posts/updates relating to this au can be found in the “OC: dalton miller” tag!

422 notes · View notes

sweeethinny · 4 years

Text

FIC COLLECTION

First of all, I'd like to say that here are all my fics - at least the ones that I tagged correctly and managed to find - and since there are many, I had to put them all bellow the cut, I hope it gets better this way :)

The fanfics with ** in front, are fanfics that I wrote recently

HP HEADCANON

HAPPY HOUR - HBP MISSING MOMENTS: One of Hinny's happy hours during HBP (T)

THE LAST MOMENT: What happened the day before Harry left - for the last time - with Dumbledore (M)

CHRISTMAS MAGIC: It's Hinny's first Christmas after the Battle, and they find a different way to celebrate (M) AO3

WHERE’S HARRY AND GINNY? : Harry and Ginny have spent some time away, so when they finally have time alone, they enjoy it until the last moment. (M) AO3

**LAST NAME: ‘I will be Mrs. Potter finally. You will no longer be the only Potter in the world. How do you feel about that? Ready to share your last name?’ (T) AO3

LAZY DAY: It's just a lazy day at the Potter house (G)

**PETITE: 'I read in a gossip newspaper that said that you are too big for me.’ (G)

THROUGH OTHER EYES: We see them... but through other eye (T)

COMFORT: Harry was never hugged or comforted after a nightmare, so when one of the children asks for it, he doesn't quite know what to do. (G)

GREEN EYES: Ginny always wondered what was behind those green eyes. (G)

SUCCUMBING: Harry can't get his beautiful and creative wife out of his mind. (M)

THE FIRST TIME OF THREE: How Harry found out he was going to be a dad. for the first time (G) THE SECOND TIME OF THREE: How Harry found out he would be a father a second time (G) THE THIRD TIME OF THREE: How Harry found out he would be a father a third time (G) AO3

TELLING THE NEWS: Harry knows that now more than anything, he cannot die, not when he will become a father, and for that, he needs to tell Ron the news (G)

GIN-GIN IS THE BEST: Gin-Gin is the best godmother Teddy could have (T)

THE FIRST POTTER: The first - of three - Potter babies to be born! (T)

**SKIN: Harry wanted to be able to show Ginny, through his eyes, how beautiful she is, and how all this insecurity with her body after giving birth to James is not necessary. Since he cannot do this, he tries in other ways. (T) AO3

**FEAR: 'Doesn’t it bother you?’ Ginny looked at him. 'Doesn’t it bother you to think that… that the world is so big and everything is so much bigger than James? That we are like two giants to him? Our garden must seem infinite through his eyes.’ (G)

JAMES AND HIS 15TH MONTH BIRTHDAY: Ginny is distraught when she realizes that her son will be 15 months old. The same age when Harry became an orphan (T)

THERE’S STILL A LOT OF SPACE: James Sirius is growing up, and Ginny wonders if there is still room for her, in his heart (G) (FLUFFFFF)

JAMES’S SICK: James is sick, and this is disturbing Harry's peace (G)

**GOLDEN DRESS: 'I feel like today is going to be different,’ Ginny promised, holding Harry’s hand and making him look at her. ‘And maybe we can do everything you wanted to do when you saw me in the gold dress for the first time?’ (T)

DEVIL IN DISGUISE: Ginny talks like an angel, walks like an angel, and acts like an angel. But Harry knows that she is the Devil in Disguise (T)

HARRY'S PROMOTION: “You know that if I’m getting this promotion, it’s thanks to you, don’t you?” (T)

**DISNEY: Draco and Astoria go to Disneyland, and Draco proves to be a man who doesn't like roller coasters (G) AO3

**THE COUPLE OF THE YEAR: The two were arm in arm, walking in silence like two kings, without even seeming to notice that everyone stopped to watch them pass (G)

HAPPY B-DAY GINNY POTTER: On Ginny's 39th birthday, she couldn't be happier to be alive. (G)

HARRY’S PENSIEVE: James S. travels through his father's saddest memories (T) (TRIGGERS FOR: DEPRESSION, DEATH, BLOOD, SELF-MUTILATION)

HARRY IT’S SUCH A GOOD FATHER: Harry can’t say no to his children, especially when they are bored (G)

MOM’S ADVICE: James has questions to ask, and who better than his mother to help him? (G) (cofcof my favorite by far cofcof)

BECAUSE IT’S THE GODFATHER’S JOB: Ron has a mission as a godfather, and he couldn't leave his godson helpless (T) PART II

I MUST NOT TELL LIES: Just a normal Potter day, when Lily Luna asked about Harry’s scar (G)

THE WORST / BEST BIRTHDAY: Some things have changed since he was 12 and lived with the Dursleys. Harry now has a family, and birthdays are not so lonely anymore (G) AO3

**INTIMATE PROBLEMS: ‘Harry.’ Teddy cried when Harry opened the door to their room, still wearing his pajamas and looking sleepy. If it weren’t for the look of panic, he would have thought the boy was sleeping on his feet. ‘My balls hurt.’ (T)

TEDDY IS DISCOVERED: Bill can be an understanding and calm guy ... but that doesn’t include when his daughter is with someone hiding in the room (ted x victorie) (T)

HARRY IS THE BEST FATHER: Moments in the life of James and Harry, where Harry proved to be the best father (T)

STILL INTO YOU: Some things just make sense, and even after all this time I'm into you... Baby not a day goes by that I'm not into you (M)

ADVICES: James Sirius makes an urgent call with his father; he needs loving advice. (G) AO3

**MISTLETOE: How could he find his best friend beautiful? How was he capable of that? (G) (James Sirius x OC)

**I’M SORRY: Mira was one of those fall that was worth it. (G) (James Sirius x OC)

**NO, I DON'T WANNA FALL IN LOVE: James Sirius faces his first broken heart (T) (James Sirius x OC)

**BAD NEWS: 'What happened?’ James asked.'The worst.’ Teddy said. ‘Vic is pregnant’ (T)

**KISSES: It felt so good to kiss him. Mira had already kissed other boys, and girls, but there was something about James that made him much better than everyone else (T) (James Sirius x OC)

JAMES IS DATING part 1 | 2: “James is dating.” Harry said, no longer holding on to the secret, remembering non-stop the scene of his son kissing the blonde warmly, in the back of their house. (T) AO3

I’M SORRY (Drastoria with a bit of Potters): Draco would do anything to see his son happy, even to apologize to ... someone. (G) (PART II)

GRADES: They are not at home when the bird arrives with James’ OWL grades.orJames Sirius is concerned about his future and the parents’ reaction to his idea (G) AO3

A PROTECTIVE FATHER: Harry is a concerned father, and when James decides to go to a party, he begins to doubt that that is the best option. (T)

ALBUS CAME OUT - PART I: Albus has something to say to James. Or, the one where Albus comes out gay to his brother and they have a conversation about it (T)

**BROTHERS: Albus and James' relationship over the years (T)

PLEEEASE?: Lily Luna just wants to be with his older brother and his 'cool' friends. Who could judge her? (G)

**INSECURITIES AND LONELINESS: Lily faces problems on her first year, problems that Ginny knows very well and knows that she will need to talk about - almost - everything about her own first year. Things are almost never easy in the beginning.(T) AO3

--------------------------------

HP AU

**JUST FRIENDS: 'Have you never been curious to know if you kiss well? Or if kissing a boy is different from kissing a girl?’ (T) (James x Sirius) AO3

EVEN AFTER THE END: They were alive. Right here, with Harry. Even after the end. (T)

IT’S CHRISTMAS!: It's Christmas and Harry can finally win the special gift that James kept so dearly (G)

**MUM: ‘Place your hand in mine,’ Lily said softly, ‘please hold my hand.’ (T) AO3

SIRIUS IS IN LOVE: "Do you always look at others like that?" (G)

NOBODY BUT YOU: For Sirius, at that moment, nothing the world exists but Hestia (M)

ALL ABOUT LOVE (SIRIUS X HESTIA): Sirius is this guy that everyone thinks kisses everyone, when in fact he is much more reserved and is afraid to connect with people. But then, when he starts going out with Hestia, he feels the happiest guy for the first time in ages (T)

DRUNK IN LOVE: ‘’I’m going to declare myself to her!’’ “You are drunk!” “Is there a better time than now?’’ (Jily + Sirius x Hestia) (T)

**ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS: 'I was the one who told him to be the secret keeper.’ Sirius sighed, his eyes watering, hugging her back and this time he hid his face in her chest. 'If they had died… Because of me.’ (Hestia x Sirius) (M)

BETTER THAN FIREWHISKY: What if Harry had realized that he loved Ginny in book five? (T)

FINALLY ALONE: ’You’re a big mama’s boy, aren’t you?“ She laughed. ‘’Lily taught you the rules well, thankfully you have me and I’m more than willing to distort you.’ (T)

TRICK OR TREAT, SWEETIE? : Halloween Special - Hinny faces a very unusual - and scary - situation on the night of the 31st (T)

WE WERE LISTENING TO THE WEEKND AND I HAD TO ASK YOU TO MARRY ME: There are things that need to be said at that moment (T)

**THE NUTCRACKER: All Harry wanted to do was take his daughter to watch The Nutcracker, but he didn't expect one of the dancers to mess with him so much. (T) AO3

**BOSS’S SON: Ginny is an auror in training, with few hours of fun in her schedule, but when one night she decides to go to a guy’s house and enjoy her youth, she is surprised by the discovery that she had sex with her boss’s son (T) AO3

**HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LILY!: Happy birthday to the woman who deserves all the happiness in the world. And for that, here’s an au where Jily lives, and Lily can celebrate her 61st birthday with her grandchildren and the whole family (G) (FLUUUUUF)

** HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PRONGS!: ‘Now who’s the old here?’ ‘It’s still you, Lils, you’re older than me… I’m like wine, every year better.’ Happy birthday my boy! (G)

REPUTATION: Harry and Ginny don't have the best reputations, which is exactly why the two get along so well. (M)

AO3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

YOU’RE THE RIGHT ONE: James discovers that some friendships can be something more. He just doesn't know how to handle it all. (next gen hp) (M) AO3 | 1 | 2 |

A LITTLE PARTY NEVER KILLED NOBODY: Harry would let her end her life without even complaining (T)

EASY: “Easy” by Camilla Cabelo (T) PART II (T)

THE ONE: Because when Harry realizes that Ginny is The One, he needs to do something about it. Even if it is risky, because his godfather always alerts him; “What is a life without a little risk?” (T) 1 | 2

THE DUKE: Some time ago a prophecy was made, one that said about two powerful and strong souls who would be able to defeat even the strongest of wizards, bringing peace that the Wizarding World has not seen for centuries. But for that to happen, they would have to be entwined through marriage. Everything was going well, the children were born healthy and were promised to each other, until one of them was kidnapped. (M) AO3 | FF.NET. | SIYE | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | **8

--------------------------------

JILYTOBER

JILYTOBER: Trapped in a broom closet (T)

JILYTOBER: Lily denying she fancies James (T)

JILYTOBER: Jily first kiss (T) (part two of the prompt where Lily denying she likes James)

JILYTOBER: At a Quidditch Match (G)

JILYTOBER: [text] [2AM] “I’m here. Come outside” (M for just a small detail that no longer has T)

--------------------------------

PROMPT

PROMPT JILY: With your fantastic ability to get into trouble, it doesn’t shock me to find you here (T)

PROMPT JILY: This is a shitty idea, do you want my help? (G)

PROMPT JILY: I want more than all of this, I want longer than forever with you. I just wanna love you. And take you on dates. And fuck you. And hug you (T)

PROMPT JILY: Simply Jily Muggle, and big declarations of love - and a runaway bride (G)

PROMPT JILY: Banana pancakes by jack johnson (G)

PROMPT JILY: Just… just talk to me. Please (T)

PROMPT ROMIONE: Sleep, I promise tomorrow will be better (G)

PROMPT SIRIUS x HESTIA: Hestia realizes there’s more to Sirius than just a bad boy image (T)

PROMPT SIRIUS X HESTIA: Sirius/ Hestia as a couple in hogwarts (T)

PROMPT SIRIUS x HESTIA: Sirius and Hestia during the years at Hogwarts (T)

**PROMPT SIRIUS X HESTA: Closing his eyes and hiding under the cover like a child, Sirius allowed himself to be miserable. It was horrible to like someone, he thought, he would rather die than have to feel it again. (T)

PROMPT HINNY: I actually wanted to get your number…(G)

PROMPT HINNY: Do you always stare at others like that? (T)

PROMPT HINNY: A new caffe has been opened near his house and Harry is besotted with the red headed barista (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Ginny thinks they’re doing a great job keeping their house plants alive but actually, Harry has secretly replaced them with identical-looking fake plants so Ginny can’t kill them (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Kissing in a vehicle for lust (T) (with mild mentions of sex)

PROMPT HINNY: This is definitely not my most attractive moment, but I promise I really am fit (M)

PROMPT HINNY: (plus Romione) Let me explain. I was bored and you left me alone. (G)

PROMPT HINNY: What Ginny would smell in her Amortentia. (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Ootp Sirius accidentally stumbles upon Harry and Ginny talking and accidentally thinking that it’s Lily and James (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Harry and Ginny come into the common room after quidditch practice and Ginny’s trying to make a bet with Harry that she can do a certain trick/trickshot in their next quidditch match (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Lily, James and Sirius react to hinny first kiss in the after life (G)

PROMPT HINNY/JILY: Hinny in an au where Jily and Sirius are alive (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Cho being jealous of Hinny in 6th year (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Ginny being jealous of Cho in 6th year (G)

PROMPT HINNY: How far did Harry and Ginny go in Half Blood prince? (M)

PROMPT HINNY: Harry and Ginny talk about their relationship after the Battle of Hogwarts (M)

PROMPT HINNY: Harry watching Ginny’s first league match (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Kissing in the rain after a declaration of love (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Jily were alive and James finding out that his daughter in law got a contract to be a professional quidditch player (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Please don’t die … If you die, I swear I will hunt you down in hell and bring you back (M) (For reasons of having description of blood and injuries)

PROMPT HINNY: Ginny was a woman who kept her cool, at least most of the time, but sometimes her Weasley blood boiled like a bubbling cauldron, and when that happened, she felt out of control and took the least rational attitude of all time. And that was how Petunia was attacked by a Bat-Bogey Hex as soon as she opened the door to the house. (G)

PROMPT HINNY: If you’ll excuse me, I’ll get my drink and leave you alone in your bad mood. I’m sure you’ll find someone better than me / you have 5 seconds to get off me (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Hinny kissing in a bar because they missing each other (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Harry winning Witch Weekly’s sexiest wizard alive (T)

PROMPT HINNY: The first time Harry is called dad (G) (fluffffffff)

PROMPT HINNY: Hinny taking 6 years old teddy to a Disneyland (G) (highly fluff)

PROMPT HINNY: Hinny and Teddy wearing matching costumes on Halloween (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Ginny's last days pregnant (G)

**PROMPT HINNY: Ron watches Harry and Ginny being new parents (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Harry and Ginny enroll their kids into a muggle Primary school the kids have a science fair, Harry helps them with it, Ginny and Arthur just being embarrassing muggle fanatics (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Have you ever died? I did a few times, it was actually quiet painful but you know what they say, no pain, no gain. (G)

**PROMPT HINNY: He and Harry had a fight last week... James said he didn’t like him anymore.’’ Ginny looked at her mother, looking a little sadder now. ‘’Harry cried.’ (G)

PROMPT HINNY: You’re safe now. I’m with you (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Hinny dropping off James Sirius for his first year at Hogwarts (G)

PROMPT HINNY: The boys and their dad vs Ginny and little Luna over having a sleepover with her guy friends (G)

PROMPT HINNY: Do you think the moon is jealous of how pretty you are? (T)

PROMPT HINNY: Dudley reviewing Harry - now, with his own family - for the first time in a few years (G) PART II

PROMPT HINNY: Blaise's son and Lily Luna start to date, and the Potter family doesn't handle the news very well (G)

PROMPT DRASTORIA: Death bed (coffee for your head) by Powfu for Drastoria (T)

#hinny #harry X ginny #my fic #hinnyheadcanon #jily #james x lily #draco x astoria #drastoria #jilytober #fluff #hp angst #smut #hp next gen #ROMIONE #james sirius x oc #sirius x hestia

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watermelonlipstick · 3 years

Text

Dreams, Chapter 8

If you haven’t read this series before, you might want to start on Chapter 1, or check out the Dreams Masterlist! Here’s the series description:

When Dean dies for good leaving Sam and his girlfriend (the reader) behind, they must figure out how to carry on without him. Alone, reeling, and unsure what to do next, trying to honor Dean’s memory and follow their hearts gets even more complicated when their nightmares become dreams that feel a little too real.

Title: Dreams, Chapter 8

Pairing: (past) Dean Winchester x Reader, (eventual) Sam Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 1416

Summary: A dream starts to change the reader’s perspective on her life with Sam.

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, s l o w b u r n

It took weeks but the physical touch you’d gotten so used to came back one handhold at a time until finally it seemed like maybe Sam had made peace with The Sledding Incident. You never forced it, didn’t say anything because you didn’t want to push him away. Waiting felt like starving with a ten course meal on a silver platter in front of you, but it paid off. Whether he realized he was rewarding you or not, the space to let Sam process was met with absentminded hands slipped around your waist at the grocery store, non-secrets hummed into the skin of your jaw and neck as you stood just barely too close, loose pieces of hair tucked behind your ear when you washed glasses at the bar. The positive reinforcement limited the clinging you’d been doing since you’d first driven away from the bunker, knowing that the less you clawed at Sam for scraps of attachment the less he felt like you were in too deep to receive it.

Repair by repair the cabin started to feel more like yours. The bathrooms got painted a faint baby blue that reminded you of long cloudless afternoons in Sioux Falls and Sam taught you some basic plumbing to fix the water pressure in the shower. It was only slightly less gross than you thought it would be, but Sam was so excited when you put the plumber’s joint caulk on perfectly that it made up for the limescale gunk under your nails. When you worked, Sam pretty much stopped playing podcasts and books, relying instead on an ever-changing kaleidoscope of music Dean would never have let anyone play in the Impala. Some of it you were pretty sure Sam didn’t even like, almost as if he was trying to learn a new culture by jumping in headfirst.

You kept writing in your journal like you were sending letters back home to Dean from summer camp, giving little updates on the cabin or Sam or ridiculous drama you heard at the bar. At night you and Sam would talk about what should get fixed next and sometimes if you were feeling tough you’d watch Sam look up at the ceiling, hair splayed out on the pillow around him like a halo while he told a story about him and Dean growing up or times you’d been away from them on the road. Every once in a while you’d heard Dean’s perspective of the same event and would give them like a little gift to Sam. His eyes would go soft, hanging on your every word and letting his mouth quirk up a hair at the corners. You’d laugh together, often sadly but surprisingly sometimes not, winding into the crook under his arm and playing the tapes of the memories in your head.

More and more frequently, you’d have good dreams—or rather, non-nightmares. Dean would get hurt and survive or you’d all be on a job together. Right before you woke up he’d be just about to say something important, warn you of something serious but couldn’t spit it out fast enough. It was frustrating, but so much nicer than waking up on soaked pillows that you just put it in a letter to Dean and tried to move on with your daytime projects and nighttime bar work. Some days it felt like you were going to be okay and then the next you’d be impaled on grief so hard you couldn’t even breathe around it. And yet, always Sam to tie yourself to and slide into the next day.

It’s cold but bright, the sunlight reflecting and magnifying itself on the snow blanketing the landscape. Salt crunches under the tires of the Impala, just barely louder than the engine and enough to be aware of through a ZZ Top tape. You’re almost on the edge of drifting asleep on the windowsill when Dean grabs your arm.

“Hey, come on, you can’t leave me.”

The urgency in his tone jolts you alert. “Why? What’s going on?”

“I don’t know how much time I have left. There’s a lot I need to tell you.”

“We haven’t even picked up Sam yet,” you answer, in the self-assuredness of dream logic. “How bad could it be?”

“It’s me, baby. It’s really me. Dead, everything, the works. I need you to focus, I don’t know how long I can stay.”

Some small sub-sub-conscious part of your mind jolts to attention. It feels honest, or at least the closest to honest as you had wanted to be in a while. You let yourself indulge it.

“You, like—really? It’s really…?”

“Yeah, it’s me. I—I don’t know how to—” and you stop him with a furtive kiss, all hunger and no grace, just wanting to feel what it was like to be against him again.

Dean swerves a little when his eyes open, momentarily dazed. “Christ, I forgot how good that was.”

“I don’t—how are you…?” you murmur, having a hard time not only with the information but also with the juxtaposition of your conscious and subconscious knowledge.

“No bullshit, I’m communicating beyond the grave. Don’t tell Miss Cleo,” he answers, the smirk twisting your stomach like a wrench.

“Are you okay? If this is what it’s like to be dead then Sam and I will be here the second I wake up, we’ll just come to you—"

“Babe, I wish you could but it doesn’t work like that. It’s not even really supposed to work like this but Cass is pulling some strings. I only have until your subconscious realizes what’s going on and kicks me out.”

“What? How?”

“The separation between living and dead is a little bit thinner when you’re asleep. It’s actually pretty cool but it’s going to take a while to explain.”

“Okay, right, got to be fast. Fuck, I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too, kid. More than I can explain. But listen, baby, I’m so proud of you for making it this far. It’s going to be okay, I promise. Sam will take care of you, and I know you’re taking care of him the best you can. I don’t know how long I have until you wake up. I’ll keep trying again to come to you, but until the next time I get to see you, my firecracker, you’re so tough. You can do a lot worse than Sam, and I would never, ever hold it against either of you. I’ve been trying to send that—been trying to ram my head through this fucking door about a hundred times by now actually—but if it hasn’t been coming through strongly enough, I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what the fuck I’d be doing if it had been one of you—probably would’ve drunk myself to death by now to be honest—so the fact that you’re so worried about whether necking is going to raise my soul from the depths is actually sorta sweet. Love is complicated and the lines get blurred; I get it, especially now with some damned perspective. As long as I’m still going to be your guy when you get here, that’s all that matters to me. You’re it for me, kid.” He traces a light finger down the side of your cheek and it sends an ache straight into your stomach, makes him look lost for a beat as he takes you in.

“Dean, I love you. I can't—I can’t even tell you how much I love you. I never got to say thank you for all the things you—”

“Hey,” he says, grabbing your chin and holding you still to flick his gaze between your eyes. “I know. There’s no time. You don’t have to say that to me, I know. I always knew. I’m going to try to get to Sam too, but he’s—the angels are shocked at the shit that’s happening in his brain. Makes sense, you know, after everything he’s gone through, but I guess it makes it harder to slip through the cracks. But here: if I can’t do this again; if this is the last time I talk to you until you get back to me, I love you, and I’m going to keep loving you no matter what. The two people I love most in the world being together could never be bad to me, and I will alway—”

And you woke up.

Continue to Dreams, Chapter 9

Thanks again for reading! If you liked it, check out my Masterlist or send me a request!

Tags: @sams-sass @vxnderlindes @deanwinchesterswitch @akshi8278 @itsjensenanddean @flannellover67 @weepingwillowphoenix @tj-drinks-tea @whatareyousearchingfordean @winchestergirl2 @winchest09 @samwisethegr8 @fawnxng @nurse-sarahrn @lovers-in-japan-reign-of-love @deanwanddamons @stressedoutkitten @winchestershiresauce @tatted-trina6 @percico-heronstairs @downanddirtydean @queenoftheunderdark @lyarr24 @waywardwifey @thinkinghardhardlythinking @wonder-cole @sergeantsea @peachyafshawn @tjfinnigan @that-one-gay-girl @calaofnoldor

And as always, if you want to be on my taglist, were on the taglist and changed your handle, or I lost track of it, please let me know!

100 notes · View notes

cloudsnbones · 3 years

Note

Here is a selection for your lovely self to choose from <3

50, 63 or 110 please 🥺 For Kerry...Susan...the wives - you know ofc.

My Hidden Angel

prompt 110: just pretend we’re okay, just for tonight

warnings: mild alcohol consumption, touches on topic of 'outing', some references to suicidal ideation

other tags: kerry x sandy (before), kerry x susan (implied), kerry & susan, hurt/comfort, hugs

Kerry’s eyes traced the mulberry patterns intertwine then separate then briefly meet together again followed by a small gap before they finally made themselves whole, ending in solid semi-circles at the opposite end of the duvet, striking loud against the cream which predominated the piece.

She was supposed to be happy, finally released loud and proud into society, herself - different, yet still beautiful. So what was wrong with her? Because she didn’t feel like that. She didn’t feel like that at all. The burning in her throat came in waves of strength whilst her heart felt like a large block of ice that had plummeted into her stomach. As for the rest of her body, it all just felt numb. Numb and useless. For the first time in a long time, she felt small, really small. Peering eyes had followed her throughout the ER as she tried to pretend that everything was ok, that she had wanted that to happen. That… what they thought didn’t matter to her. She was their boss after all. It shouldn’t.

But if she couldn’t even convince herself, how on earth could she convince anyone else?

After leaving work she had stormed over to the Fire Station where Sandy worked to give her a piece of her mind, chew her, and spit her out as Sandy had done to her. Returning the favour. But she had been left feeling even worse.

Even more hated and alone than she had before which was something considering… everything.

And she knew that if she passed away in her sleep, no one would care. No one would come to her funeral, no one would mourn. And as devastating as that is, she felt at peace. For once in her damn life, she wanted to be quiet. To hide. To return back into her bulletproof shell and never leave.

There was a light tap on the door.

Kerry ignored it. It could wait. Probably a door-to-door salesperson. Not worth her time.

A slightly louder knock followed, and then a loud buzz.

This now seemed more like a person, perhaps… Sandy?

Kerry’s heart fluttered in hope. And it was this alone which eventually forced her to get one and then two legs out of bed, wrapping her body tightly in her silk dressing gown before slowly making her way to the door, leaning on nearby furniture to do so.

When Kerry got to the door she took in a small breath, closing her eyes to rack up the courage to be able to speak coherently in front of her again. She didn’t want to relax her guard, or to let her anger completely ease off but what she really didn't want - was to be alone. And it was this sole urge for companionship that drove her resolve to forgive Sandy. She had found herself in the past year and despite her still wavering confidence in her sexuality she couldn't deny that she had never felt more complete, more understood, lighter, and happier since she had discovered she was a…

Lesbian.

In one quick movement, she turned her key in the lock and pushed down the door handle pulling it towards her, she opened her eyes expecting to see Sandy on the other side apologetic and soft but instead she saw someone whom she did not expect. Dr. Lewis.

“I-” Kerry started, her face dumbfounded.

Susan just smiled, 75% convincingly, holding up a bag to her face filled with a lovely aroma of spices.

Kerry looked at her suspiciously.

“I’ve brought you dinner,” Susan said, after a beat, trying to ignore the deep feelings of anger and frustration which she had always associated with Kerry.

“Oh thank you,” Kerry replied eventually, peering at the bag from where she was standing, frozen to the spot, “Why don’t you come in?” She added awkwardly her voice catching on the words and she squinted her nose and eyes slightly in embarrassment of herself, letting out a small sigh.

Susan just continued to smile and stepped into the door as Kerry shuffled out of the way before she closed the door.

“Please come on through.” Kerry said, “oh, and shoes off before you come in please.”

Susan had expected that to be the case, she smiled playfully to herself as she slid her shoes off.

Kerry stood, watching her uncomfortably, wondering what she would do and also questioning as to why this had happened in the first place. She bit her lip and curled her right ankle around to scratch at the back of her calf, which wasn’t the best idea as within seconds she began to lose her balance. Before she really had the opportunity to fall or to steady herself, Susan caught her outstretched arms ensuring she stayed strictly upright.

Kerry was shocked. Not only by the sudden contact but also of the position she was in with regards to Susan. She was staring directly at Susan’s chest. Well, where her chest was below her periwinkle jumper. Her eyes widened and she raised her head to look at Susan before shaking herself back into reality and straightening up allowing Susan to let go of her arms. Despite this, the place where she had touched her, burned.

When Kerry looked back at Susan she noticed her empty hands. But where was the food? Oh, Susan had just placed the bag on the floor. She needed to get a grip.

Kerry made to brush off her slacks only to find silky material there instead and that is when she realised that she was in fact not wearing her day clothes at all but her night-time things, and her cheeks began to glow red.

But Susan didn’t care, she just picked up her takeout bag and gestured towards the entrance to the living room, “This way?”

Kerry swallowed and then nodded, a bit too fiercely. Susan smiled and Kerry followed her into the living room.

“Do you have any films?” Susan asked as she sat herself down on the sofa.

“What do you mean?”

“Just… films.”

“Yeah, I mean, uh… kinda, maybe not the type you’re thinking of though...” Kerry’s voice tailed off.

“That’s alright, we can just watch whatever’s on.”

Kerry stood, passively watching Susan turn on the tv and set out the food she had brought with her onto the table before her. After a moment it registered that this may appear strange so in a hurried shuffle made her way to sit down next to Susan. She placed her hands politely on her knees and looked pointedly at the carpet in front of her. Susan glanced over.

“Are you alright?” She wondered aloud, a touch of a laugh in her voice.

Kerry furrowed her eyebrows, her mouth twitching in tandem, “Yeah, I-” she let herself process what she wanted to express before she turned abruptly round to Susan and queried, “Why are you here?”

The harshness of her voice and the absence of friendliness in Kerry’s general demeanour led Susan to feel as if she was being interrogated, as if she wasn’t welcome in Kerry’s home, and by breaching this unspoken contract of keeping distance between employer and employee she had perhaps angered the beast without intending to. It would not be the first time. But as she took her time to consider Kerry’s apparel, the soft plea in her eyes, and her stiff, clunky posture, the way she glanced at her leg every so often as if she was worried something would happen to it. But what could it possibly undergo? Except… judgement. Kerry’s defensiveness, her ferocity, so present in Susan’s life as a constant adherence and annoyance was down to experiences like she had had today. Susan could see that now. She knew that in the past she had only helped contribute but today maybe she could change that, but first, she needed Kerry to trust her.

Susan relaxed her shoulders and placed the empty take-out bag onto the floor underneath the sofa before she began.

“To cut a long story short; I’m bi.” She looked up to catch her eyes with Kerry’s as if to prove she was telling the truth before she continued, “And, when I was in high school, there was this most beautiful girl, she had dark hair and the pinkest lips and her voice always sounded like she was singing.” Susan closed her eyes, reminiscing.

“We were best friends, her and I, and we did everything together. I was intoxicated, but there was nothing I could have really done about it. I had a massive crush on her. I don’t know how they knew, perhaps I hadn’t hidden it as well as I’d thought but some of the boys in my year started teasing me about it, asking if I was a ‘lesbigay or whatever, and when I obviously didn’t respond and got embarrassed they um, they decided to announce it to the whole school.”

Kerry’s mouth opened, stunned into silence. This wasn’t what she had expected at all! Setting aside the fact that Susan was also gay, Kerry listened to her story with deep compassion, and horror. She tried to express her sympathies but only managed to stare at Susan wide-eyed and she hoped that the empathy she felt in her heart managed to express itself well enough on her face.

After looking at Kerry's face, Susan continued, “Yeah, it was pretty terrible, I lost a lot of friends that year. But um...” She paused for a second, considering her next words. “The thing that happened to you today reminded me of that and I couldn’t rest easy staying at home and thinking about it so I came over and did what I wish someone, a friend, or a parent even, had done when I was in that state. Because it is tough, and it is lonely. And no matter the shit that’s happened between us in the past, no one deserves that, no one. So as allies, I guess, let’s just pretend everything’s okay, just for tonight.” Susan smiled at Kerry then, and the redhead began to understand how much she had needed a friend, someone who would accept her, and understand why she had to hide. Someone to let her know she wasn’t alone.

“But anyway!” Susan clapped her hands together with a new-found cheerfulness instilled in her, disrupting the melancholy mood immediately. “Let’s eat!”

Throughout the evening they talked very little, making mild comments on the hallmark movies or about the food, and Kerry eventually found the strength to thank Susan for her kindness. Once the meal was over, Kerry produced a bottle of Pinot Grigio for the two to share and despite Susan’s inner voice telling her to ‘go home’ she accepted the offer. The alcohol loosened Kerry’s tongue and she was no longer sat like a meerkat on the lookout but instead as if she was spending an evening with a friend. Susan let Kerry cry and rested her head on her, oh the softness of the cashmere against Kerry’s cheek as she buried herself deep in Susan’s softness.

They stayed in that position for a while, even once Kerry’s crying had ceased, Susan would rub her hand up and down her bank comforting her and reminding her that someone was there. Someone who cared about her, who understood her.

The intimacy and the alcohol and the events of the day meant that once Kerry ultimately did lift her head up and came face to face with Susan, so close she could almost feel the light hairs on her face, she was overcome with this urge to kiss her. Not a rough kiss, nor a gentle kiss, more a kiss goodbye or hello, a kiss saying thank you. Her hand tenderly stroking Susan's jawline, suggesting the act was about more than just lust or circumstance.

At first, Susan lent into it, Kerry’s taste being much calmer than she had expected, but once she realised what was happening she pulled herself out of it, gently, so as not to potentially hurt Kerry.

Susan smiled a sweet smile, slightly flushed as if she was sixteen once more and encountering her crush in the cafeteria. “You’re a really good kisser,” she observed trying to relieve some of the deep mortification evident on Kerry’s face, “But not tonight.”

She helped Kerry to her bed before setting herself down on the couch and continued to grin, touching her fingertips lightly to her lips where Kerry had kissed her.

Not tonight, but next time...?

#susan lewis x kerry weaver #kerry weaver #er #nbc er #susan lewis #kerry x susan #kerry weaver x susan lewis #susan x kerry #kerry weaver x sandy lopez #kerry x sandy #hurt/comfort #wine #movies #every good thing #my writing

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divinegrey · 2 years

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Psych major here! (actually yes im queer and mentally ill don't expose me like that) i wanna say that vanisher as a character is so well written, the trauma, the figure of her former trainer as a shadow that she constantly fights with...In my opinion vanisher isn't a good person but is not a villian either - i think that you picture her character so well because it's not dull, she is just like us - complicated with lots of inner troubles. And yes she did some shitty things, but this girl tries her best.I wish i could give her a hug because she's been through a lot.

And for me there's a hard pill to swallow that you might not agree with it - jinx and vanisher relationship is not healthy, it's complicated and hard to work out because they are both struggling with their own traumas. It's a ride or die kind of relationship but both of them want some type of affection and i think that they don't even know what healthy relationship looks like (which is very sad)

And yes even if i think that they are an amazing duo, both vanisher and jinx need to fix their own mental state because they need to find themselves. -find inner peace and agree with the past and just move on, because they cannot change past, they can create the future based on their own rules - Vanisher without Yelora and Jinx (without Silco i think)

Thanks for this amazing story and i hope you are doing well! xx

anon, im so glad you proved my theory of psych majors being queer or mentally ill. this is going into my research (just kidding).

but also, you're right. i never intended to portray vanisher as a good person. she isn't. she's on the same level as jinx, silco, sevika, all those guys. she's not an angel of any sorts, believe me, she's done horrible things. it was the question of whether she did those things because she wanted to or because she had to. having yelora as a mentor figure really didn't help at all.

as for vanisher and jinx's relationship, there's an element of truth in that. neither of them have gotten over their trauma. jinx sure as hell isn't anywhere close to that, and vanisher's only just gotten started in trying to let go what yelora did to her. it's not healthy for either of them, but we certainly can't expect either of them to actually know what a healthy relationship looks like.

you're welcome and im even more glad you could psychoanalyze my gay little story <3 please keep the hot takes coming (in my inbox or in my dms!)

#grey answers the anons #no bc this is so well thought out

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livsoulsecrets · 3 years

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Kit Herondale Fic - Am I Enough?

Summary: Kit wonders if he has what it takes to be the big brother Mina deserves and goes to Alec for some advice, which proves to be really useful.

It was funny, Kit thought as he got up from Magnus’ fancy couch, leaving his parents happily chatting with Jace as he retold some of his favorite memories with Alec. Everyone saw Jace as this untouchable hero, an example of glory and fierceness, even Jace himself thought that, Kit was certain, but nobody was more worth of admiration to Jace than Alec, that much was clear in the way he looked at his parabatai for affirmation every time he spoke in public, the anchoring hand he would always lay on Alec’s shoulder before battle and the softness of the words whispered between them.

Alec was Jace’s hero in every sense of the world. Alec was everything Kit hoped he could be to Mina, little Mina that would hang on to his finger like her life depended on it, who would smile at him every time he picked her up, Mina, who he would die for and live for and do anything and everything for. His light and wild rose, she was so much more than he deserved, but Kit was determined to be exactly who she needed.

That determination is what kept Kit going as he walked into Magnus and Alec’s kitchen, finding the Consul of the Shadowhunters, the highest authority of their people, one of their most skilled and wisest members, with glitter all over his hair and a well-intended, but still tragically messy rainbow on his cheek, courtesy of his son, Rafael, who looked quite proud of himself.

— Yes, now you are ready for the party! — Rafe announces, putting the paint-brush down.

— Thank you for that, I am sure I look... — Alec stops, looking over to Kit, noticing his presence. — Interesting? — He completes, hesitant.

— That is one way to put it. — Kit answers, barely containing a laugh.

— He looks gay! — Rafael says, fiercely, crossing his arms.

— I look what now? — Alec asks, confused, but still entertained.

— You heard the kid. — Kit is laughing now, not being able to help it.

— Gay, dad. Papa told me gay means happy as well! He said you would be gay twice if I made you happy on your birthday! — Rafael explains, looking offended his point wasn’t understood. — I know how much you like my drawings, so I made you a gay one, like the flag we bought last week. — Kit feels like he is intruding a lovely family moment, but he is too touched by Rafe’s dedication to miss the scene. Alec smiles and bows down to kiss his son’s forehead.

— Gracias, hijo. — He says, messing his hair up in sequence. — I do love your drawings and I love you even more. — Rafe smiles back to his dad, pleased with himself. He gets off the table, where he was sitting to be able to paint his dad’s face, and runs to the living room.

— He is adorable, you know. — Kit says and Alec smirks.

— Yeah, he really is. I’m lucky. — Alec’s words are simple and direct, like many things about him are, but they stick with Kit. Before he met his family, he used to think love was a complicated, painful and disastrous thing, like what his dad seemed to feel for his mom and for Kit himself, like the lies and betrayal he saw in the Shadow Market, like the tricks he pulled as well. It was only after getting to know Tessa and Jem that Kit noticed love was quite simple, that good, real love was calm and peaceful and felt like home. The trust and the care he learned from them made Kit understand that loving somebody is not about the big gestures and dramatic moves, it is about knowing someone inside out and still staying, not because you desperately needed them, but because you desperately wanted them.

Alec’s love for his family was a lot like the one Jem and Tessa had, the love they shared with Mina and Kit. That is what prompted Kit to come after Alec today, seeking some guidance in how to present this very same type of love to his little sister.

— Alec, could I ask you something? I know it is your birthday and I don’t want to bother you, but I promise it will be fast-

— Kit, just ask it. You’re not bothering me. — Alec cuts his rambling off and Kit is grateful for that, not even understanding why he is so nervous. Ever since he moved in with Tessa and Jem, he had met Alec many times and grew quite close with his family as well, since Tessa was one of Magnus’ oldest friends. If there was one thing he knew, it was that Alec could never be anything other than kind towards him.

— Okay, sure. Good. — He answers, eyes casting down. — This is probably a weird question, but... How did you make sure you were the brother your siblings needed? Because, honestly, Jace and Izzy adore you and it seems so effortless to you that it blows my mind. I have known Mina her whole life, which is not much, you know? She is only one. But, for her, it is a lot of time! Still, I don’t know what I’m doing. I feel like- By the Angel, like she needs so much more than I can give her. That is insane, I get it, her favorite word at the moment is poop and she adores to scream it at the top of her lungs every time we’re out, of course she doesn’t have great expectations right now, but she will someday and I don’t think I will be able to be who she needs me to be. Will I even deserve all the trust she puts in me? All the love she gives me? Will I even-

— Kit, stop. — Alec firmly demands and Kit is so shocked by the action that he finally turns to look at him. It is quite astonishing to find a sly smile on Alec’s lips. — Just stop, okay? You’re overthinking away too much, trust me: I have been there. It was never effortless to me, quite the opposite. I spent most of my life doubting I could be the right person to keep my siblings safe. When Max-

He stops, swallows dryly, seeming to gather himself for what he is about to say before speaking again.

— When Max died, I was destroyed. I felt like I failed him. Somedays I still do, so does Izzy, so does Jace. Still, I know Max would never think that of us, he knows Sebastian is the only one to blame for what happened. — His expression softens for a moment and Kit hopes he didn’t bring out any hard memories on such a happy day. — What I’m trying to say is that you will never feel like you’re enough or like you know what you’re doing, it will always be hard and the idea of letting Mina down will always be scary. There is no running away from that.

— So, I will just feel this terrified forever? — He is well aware of how disturbed he sounds, but can’t help it when Alec just dropped this bomb on him.

— No, not if you learn one little thing, that took me many years to understand. — Alec’s voice is soft now; the tone Kit only ever saw him use around his family.

— And what is that?

— Mina already thinks you’re the everything she needs. She already thinks you deserve all the love and trust she gives to you. You know why? — Alec questioned and Kit just stared blankly at him, not knowing what to say. — Because, every single day, you get up and choose to try your best to make her happy and keep her safe. That is all she needs from you: to never stop trying. She doesn’t want you to drive yourself crazy or sacrifice anything for her. I once thought the same, I was sure I could never be myself or be happy, if I wanted my siblings to be proud of me. I thought that was the only way I could protect them. Angel, how I was wrong. All they ever wanted was for me to be exactly who I am. — He glares at Jace laughing loudly in the living room, Izzy rolling her eyes at him, but still smiling softly at her brother shortly after, and something shifts inside of Kit.

That is what he wants for his and Mina’s future. He wants her to laugh at him until they are both out of breath, he wants her look at him with the just right combination of exasperation and affection, to still grab his hand when she is scared and run to his arms when she is happy.

— So... You are saying that I should just be myself? — Kit queries and Alec nods, as if he just asked him if the sky was blue.

— Yes, as cheesy as it sounds, just keep doing what you’re doing and I’m sure you will be fine.

— But what if who I am is not enough, Alec? — His voice cracks and he hates how obvious his uncertainty is, but Alec doesn’t shudder.

— Kit, you are more than enough. The fact you even question it already shows you are, that is why you care so much. Still, I know, better than most, that I can’t be the one to tell you that. Any words will fall flat if you don’t believe in it. Look, I wouldn’t worry too much about Mina if I were you. She already adores you. Maybe just focus on believing in yourself, make sure you see why she does. Do that, kid, and I can assure you all these doubts will vanish. — He lays a hand in his shoulder and squeezes it, dropping it shortly after.

— That was really... Wise. — Kit blurted out, trying to absorb what he just heard.

— Don’t sound so surprised. — Alec jokes and Kit can’t help but fell an overwhelming sense of gratitude settling in his chest.

— Thank you for saying all of that. It really helped, like, you have no idea how much. — Kit thanked him; glad he had gone to Alec with his questions.

— You’re welcome. — He calmly responded, just as Izzy entered the kitchen with an empty glass.

— Alec, where do you keep the wine? Because I’m sure Magnus is hiding the good stuff from me! — She claims, coming to rest against the door way.

— If I told you where he keeps it, I will probably have divorce files on my desk by morning. — Alec playfully provokes his sister, that just waves his concern away with a hand.

— Fine, for the sake of your marriage, I will just have you ask him for me. — Then, upon realizing Alec’s lack of interest in the idea, she pouts, moving to hang on Alec’s shoulder. — Please? — He looks down at her and sighs.

— As you please. — She claps in excitement and kisses him in the cheek.

— I’ll be waiting! — Izzy announces, before leaving the kitchen.

— Are you good? — Alec asks Kit once his sister disappears into the living room.

— I will be. — Kit answers and he is only half faking the confidence in his voice, so he takes that as a win.

— Yeah, you will. — Alec confirms as he walks away, Kit on his tow. He drops himself back in the couch, deep in thought. He is startled when a tiny hand grabs his left leg. Once Kit looks down, he finds Mina holding on tight to him to push herself up. He smiles down at her as she stands, her grip on Kit so strong he wonders if that is some sort of Shadowhunter-Warlock baby superpower.

— Min-Min, you are getting though. — He proudly states. Mina giggles, as if she understands what he’s saying and puts both of her hands up, a common indication she wants to be picked up by him.

Kit gladly does so, placing his sister in his lap. She wiggles her little feet up as she rests her head against his chest, one of her hands coming to grip the collar of his shirt. She must probably be tired, her nap time coming up, but Kit tells himself he’ll soon put her down in Rafe’s bed like Magnus offered, even though he knows he most likely won’t. He holds her against his heart as she dozes off, feeling her hand relaxing the grip in order to rest against his heart, her five little perfect fingers going up and down with every heartbeat beneath them.

In that moment, he’s absolutely sure they’ll be just fine, not because he’s perfect or sure he will never make mistakes, but simply because he loves her away too much to be anything other than his very best self.

#Kit Herondale #Kit Rook #kit herondale fic #Alec Lightwood #Jace Herondale #izzy lightwood #max lightwood #mina carstairs #jem carstairs #tessa gray #rafael lightwood bane #the shadowhunters chronicles #my fics #the dark artifices #the mortal instruments #ghosts of the shadow market #fluff

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destielfanfic · 3 years

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My First Destiel Fic, vol.3

Thank you guys for sharing your memories! My First Destiel Fic is a nostalgic survey open to any destiel fan and has a simple goal - to celebrate fics that were our gateway into a wonderful world of destiel shipping. Thank you, fic writers, you are our heroes!

from @nextheirofslytherin

my first destiel fic was “In This Secluded Spot I Respond As I Wouldn't Dare Elsewhere” by RhymePhile. the girl i liked who got me into supernatural in middle school recommended it to me, so it always has a special place in my heart 😅 it was the first fic i read on ao3 too! i read it while i was watching s3 (cas hadn’t even shown up yet!) but the show was in its 9-10th season

All fic titles link directly to the fic, when it’s possible, we have added another link to our review or submitted rec post.

In This Secluded Spot I Respond As I Wouldn’t Dare Elsewhere by rhymephile [M, 34,000 word count, posted 2010] (our review)

It's 1995, and Castiel's high school years are destined to be difficult: home-schooled until eighth grade, he is awkward, shy, and socially inept. The weird kid with the funny name would rather isolate himself and draw in his sketchbook than deal with the constant bullying he faces every day. Things only get worse in his junior year when he excels in home economics class, leading the captain of the baseball team, Alastair, to start taunting him for being gay. Then new student Dean Winchester arrives at Flour Bluff High School, sharing many of Castiel's classes. Castiel has seen his type before -- handsome, athletic, arrogant, and sure to be the most popular kid in school. But Castiel eventually learns that he and Dean have more in common than he thought, and they form an unlikely friendship.

from @deansbff

i joined the fandom in the beginning of 2019 and molting expectations by tricia_16 was the first fic (over 11k words) that i read. it really made me fall in love with deancas because i realised i didn't need them to be in the canon!verse to be so wonderful, their relationship was amazing in whatever universe they were in and it was always intriguing to read about!!

Molting Expectations by tricia_16 [163,100 word count, posted 2019]

After having trouble coping with a traumatic incident on the job, Dean takes his little brother's advice and leaves everything behind to go stay at the old family cabin in Colorado. Nobody's been there for years so it needs some major work, but it's secluded, and that turns out to be exactly what Dean needs in order to start to feel at peace again. Now in the mountains with nothing but nature to amuse himself with, he takes up bird watching and plans a hike into the mountain range across from his cabin in search of a golden eagle. High up in the mountains, he discovers human footprints. Thinking someone is in danger, he follows them into a cave and quickly becomes familiar with a form of wildlife he never could have imagined: winged people who call themselves angels.

from @bornonathursdayinmarch

I actually started out in the fandom against Destiel. I mean, it was pretty clear that Dean Winchester was not into men. But then I read “Redemption Road” by accident around 2015. I didn’t know it was Destiel. But I got really into it and this fic totally changed my mind on Dean/Cas. I have since read hundreds of Destiel fics and I am more into the ship than ever. My absolute favorite fanfic is “Sweaters and Cigarettes” by lemonoclefox. I love how shy, caring Dean softens cynical Castiel and how in love they are despite being so different. It makes me smile when I’m down.

Redemption Road by spnredemption (the fic is a collaborative effort of a group of destiel writers and artists) [NC-17, 650,000 word count, 24 episodes, posted 2011-12)

With Castiel having set himself up as the new God, drunk on power and volatile as a nuclear reactor, Dean, Sam, and Bobby find themselves on the run from the jealous, capricious monster wearing the face of their friend. Desperate for protection and wary of his brother’s mental state since Castiel unlocked Sam’s memories of Hell, Dean knows Castiel must be defused before he can wreak further havoc in Heaven or on Earth. Although Bobby advocates for destroying Castiel by whatever means necessary, Dean is convinced the Cas he once knew still remains, buried somewhere beneath the mass of poisonous souls and calling out for help. Determined to save the angel who once rescued him from Hell and redefined his purpose in life, Dean himself must resist the allure of the false deity vying for his obedience, and come to terms with the knowledge, long-suppressed, that his feelings for Castiel run much deeper than brotherhood. It is this bond, and the dubious distinction of the Righteous Man, that will ultimately grant Dean access to where Castiel’s grace languishes in Purgatory. However, what Dean brings back with him is broken, angry, and only half-angel, certainly not the Castiel he remembers—and nor is it the only thing that returns to Earth with them…

Sweaters & Cigarettes by lemonoclefox [NC-17, 150,000 word count, posted 2014] NOTE - the fic was deleted from ao3 by the author, please see our review for more details

Dean Winchester is in high school, crushing hard on Castiel Novak, the unbelievably hot goth who Dean does his very best to convince himself he hates, despite the fact that he can’t really stop staring at him. Dean tries, but when the two of them finally cross paths, their first conversation takes a surprising turn. And suddenly, they both find themselves falling harder and faster than they ever could have expected.

from @iamasphodelknox

Hi! The fic that made Destiel my OTP was The Walk series by Persephoneshadow. It blew my mind and I hadn’t even started watching Supernatural yet. 🙈 I started watching the show last year, just as Season 15 was starting. I’m a newbie but this comfort ship felt like coming home. I also read a turn of the earth by microcomets just as I got to season 4 and it is one of the best things I’ve ever read, fic or no. :)

The Walk by Persephoneshadow [NC-17, 190,000 word count, posted 2017]

Castiel tells himself it was a one time thing, even if his night with a hooker named Dean changed his whole world, but he can’t keep away from the man fate keeps throwing in his path. Castiel is married and he knows his sexuality is an affront to God and everything he’s ever been told is right. Dean tells himself he doesn’t care about the weirdo with blue eyes, but every time they meet he gets a bit closer to something like hope. Dean’s nothing but a homeless waste of space with a brother in foster care a world away and a father in the wind. As the connection between these two lost men deepens, it threatens the carefully maintained lies their lives are built on in a story of faith, mistakes, and the journey of love.

a turn of the earth by mishcollin microcomets [NC-17, 95,300 word count, posted 2015] (our review)

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run. Frigging fantastic. (Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline pre series and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

If you enjoyed the fic, please drop by the archive (AO3) and let the author know with your comments and/or kudos! And if you found our recs useful, let us know by Liking and/or Reblogging our posts!

You can find all My First Destiel Fic posts under this tag!

#destiel #destielfanficnet #my first destiel fic #hey guys #these are all submissions we received #if you don't see yours here #please contact mod flyingcatstiel directly #nextheirofslytherin #deansbff #bornonathursdayinmarch #iamasphodelknox

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sinnabonka · 3 years

Note

i need to move on from SPN. how do i do that? (drugs not currently an option.) can someone please suggest something else (something better.. so nothing on the CW, thanks) that i might become obsessed with to take my mind off SPN? i no longer enjoy thinking about it. i want to reclaim my brain. preferably nothing with guns/violence or lots of white American men. (thanks, 2021.)

Hey, anon, I’m gonna promote my other CANON SHIP to you, okay?

The story has a happy ending, no bittersweet shit, the fandom is AWESOME. The author TALKS TO FANS and he also confirms it being WRITTEN and then ACTED like a LOVE STORY. One of two mains is AN ALLY (feral feral man named Michael and we love him for that). The fandom is very inclusive (everyone is welcomed, people are people, no matter what’s your gender, race, age etc, also has a great representation included).

It’s my haven of peace I come back to when I need a break from all the drama.

Also, bonus point, no white American (almost, okay?) men! Mains are Scottish and Welsh!

Some guns might be included, but they don’t hurt anyone.

Let me present you one (1) genderfluid snake boi and one (1) gay angel.

(This story also has a Crowley, I love Crowleys)

#I miss my life being simple and joyful with good omens eh #it’s short #only 6 episodes #and a book #but MY GOD ITS EVERYTING #good omens #the ineffable husbands #spn #destiel #sinnabonka answers

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noladyme · 3 years

Text

La Cuervo - Chapter 25

She is used to the biker-life, having grown into a woman in the familiar embrace of SAMCRO. A bad decision and a gun-shot later, she gets whisked off to Santo Padre, and put under the protection of another club. What is supposed to be a short stint in the Mayan headquarters just north of the border to Mexico, turns into something more; when la quervo begins to develop feelings for el angel - and he seems to return them in kind...

TW: violence, blood, drug use, alcohol, smut, fluff, angst

In the spirit of "The Crown Princess of Charming", this is a story about O.C. Nina and Angel Reyes. It is obviously non-canon, as characters who have passed on, on Mayans M.C., are present in it, and others have been excluded completely. Nina is written as a cis-female, but I have tried to keep her race and looks as ambiguous as possible. Should you find any of this story offensive, please let me know.

25.

After their middle of the night conversation and subsequent make-up sex, Nina and Angel got a few hours of sleep.

The sound of the birds in the tree outside, and a hard knocking on the front door, woke Nina up. Turning her head, she saw that Angel was still sound asleep, with Bug nuzzled up in the crook of his neck. Finding the sight too adorable to disturb, Nina quietly crawled out of bed, and put on her sleeping shorts, and one of Angel’s shirts. Putting a bit more weight on her pained leg than she’d been able to a few days earlier, she made her way to the front door, and looked out the peep hole; before opening.

“Good morning”, EZ said; holding up two paper cups of coffee. “He’s still sleeping”, Nina said, and moved so he could enter. “In the bed?”, EZ asked disbelievingly. “He told you…”, she muttered. “He’s my brother. He told me you guys weren’t doing so good… But, you’re better now?”. “We’re working on it”, Nina shrugged. “I’ll go get him, so you can give him that”. She nodded towards the coffee. “No, this is for you”. EZ held out a cup for her, and she took it confusedly.

She limped over to sit on the couch, and lit one of the cigarettes from Angel’s pack. Bug slipped out through the crack of the bedroom door, and when he saw EZ, he hissed. “What the hell is that?”, the prospect asked. “Bug… Her cat”, Angel grunted, as he came out after the cat; rubbing his eyes. He’d taken time to put on sweatpants and a beater. “Our cat”, Nina reiterated. “It looks… sick”, EZ said, giving Bug’s one and a half ear and skinny body a hesitant look. Angel walked over, and gave the cat a quick scratch behind the ears. “He’s a fighter”, he said, and went over to sit down next to Nina.

EZ sat down on the recliner, and looked down at his own coffee. “I would have gotten you one, but I didn’t know if you’d already left”, he muttered at Angel. “It’s good bro”, Angel said, and nabbed Nina’s cigarette. The prospect gave Nina a half smile. “It was kind of a peace-offering. You’ve been staying away from the clubhouse”. “I’m not mad at you”, Nina said. “I’m just… I don’t know if I’m ready to face Bishop and Taza”. “Taza hasn’t been around either”, Angel said. “You guys didn’t… He’s ok, right?”, Nina asked worriedly. She was angry, but she didn’t want Taza hurt. “We haven’t done anything to him… But we have a vote later today”, Angel said. “We need to decide whether he and Bish’ are keeping their posts”. “Why?”, Nina guffawed. “Because they went behind the club’s back; pulling that shit with you and Palo”, Angel said. “Bishop has stepped down temporarily, until we decide what to do. He’s been around, but Tranq’s taken the head of the table for now… He ain’t president material, though”. “And Taza?”, Nina said. “If we vote Bish’ back in, I’m guessing he’s gonna want him back as VP… If we let Taza come back at all”, Angel said.

EZ took a sip of his coffee, and leaned forwards; giving his brother a hesitant look. “Where do you stand on all that?”. Angel took a deep draw from the cigarette, and blew out the smoke while shaking his head. “I’m not sure, man…”, he admitted. “As prez’ and VP, I didn’t ever have a problem with them before. But they lied to the club… And this shit was personal to me. They put Nina in danger”. “You don’t have a problem with Taza being…”, EZ said, trailing off. “It’s called gay… homosexual… He likes men. You can say it”, Nina scolded him. “Yeah, I can say it…!”, EZ exclaimed. “It’s just one of those rules I’ve had trouble dealing with. I follow the club on a lot of things; but that…”. Nina gave him slight smile; happy that he felt like she did. “I don’t have a problem with that”, Angel shrugged. “No one should”.

Taking sip from the cup, Nina then traded Angel the coffee for the cigarette. She took a deep drag, before stubbing it out. “Well, it looks like you have stuff to do today”, she said. “I guess me and Bug will just hang out here”. The cat came over to brush against her good leg. He’d been good with leaving the pained one alone. “Hank wants you at the clubhouse…”, EZ muttered, giving her a hesitant look. “He sent me to get you… We didn’t know if you and Angel were talking”. Nina sighed. “I don’t know… EZ, all that shit that went down…”. “That’s why he wants you there”, EZ said. “He wants the club to hear your side, before they take the vote”.

Looking up to meet Angel’s eyes, Nina found nothing but warmth and support in them. “I’m not gonna make you do anything. It’s up to you, ma’”. She took the cup from him, and emptied it; before getting to her feet. “I’m gonna need more coffee…”, she grunted, and limped in to the bedroom to get dressed.

---

The scrapyard seemed like a completely different place to the last time Nina had been there. There was tension in the air, as EZ and Angel – with Nina behind him – rode up to the clubhouse. Chucky gave her slight wave from the front office, when they passed it.

Coco and Gilly came down from the porch to greet them as they arrived, and Nina gave both of them a warm hug. “Are you ok?”, she asked. “I know there was at least some fighting the other day…”. “We’re good, niña”, Coco said. “How’s the leg?”. “Much better”, Nina said. Letting Angel put his arm around her waist, they all walked up to the porch, and into the clubhouse together.

Inside, the rest of the charter – except for Taza – were spread throughout the room. Bishop sat alone by a table in the corner; and gave her short look. He almost looked embarrassed. Hank walked straight up to Nina, and put a hand on her shoulder. “Thanks for coming”, he said warmly. “We need your take on all this”. “I don’t know what you want me to say… I’m not happy about what happened”, Nina said. “We just need you to be honest”, Riz said, having come over to join them. “Shouldn’t come as a problem…”, Creeper muttered sarcastically, and stubbed out his cigarette. Nina frowned confusedly in his direction. “Where are we doing this?”, Angel asked. “Templo…”, Hank said. “And we should get to it. We got Reaper incoming soon”. Nina swallowed thickly. Being in the room with Bishop was hard enough, but having to face Filip was something she hadn’t been prepared for. “It’ll be ok, cuervo”, Angel said below his breath. The nickname struck her as odd at the moment, but Nina decided against challenging him on it; and simply let him lead her into templo. EZ stayed behind in the bar area, looking worried, and prepared for anything to happen.

Letting his hand brush against his usual chair, Hank went to sit at the head of the table. He looked very uncomfortable with his current station. “Please…”, he said, and gestured for Nina to take the seat at the other end of the table. The rest of the Mayans took to their own seats; with Bishop taking the one furthest from his regular seat. This meant he sat just around the corner of the table from Nina, making her unable to ignore him. Angel shot her a comforting smile, before looking to his temporary president.

Seemingly waiting for someone else to begin, Hank finally realized that was his job; and cleared his throat. “I guess… we should get started”, he said. “Nina; thanks for coming. I asked the prospect to bring you, because we have an important vote coming up; but we need to know what to base our decision on”. Riz let Hank out of his misery, by taking over. “We already heard from Bishop. He let us know that you weren’t aware of his and Taza’s decision to go behind our backs…” “Yeah, they behind our backs, but so did she…”, Creeper interrupted. He looked hard at Nina. “You might not have known the real plan, but you went against the club’s decision; and snuck off to do your own shit”. “Sure, but she’s not a member of the club”, Gilly said. “Pretty damn close”, Creeper said.

Angel looked at Creeper; the promise of a serious beating almost written in neon over his head. “What are you trying to say? You wanna punish her?”, he said. “I didn’t bring her here to get…”. “I’m just telling it like it is”, Creeper said. “Nina tricked me in to letting her sneak away”. Bishop chuckled slightly. “Maybe you shouldn’t be so easily tricked…”, he said. “Careful, Bishop”, Riz said. “You’re the one on trial here, and Creep isn’t wrong”. Nina threw up her hands, and sighed. “Why don’t you just get to it then. Punch me around, and degrade me to toilet-cleaner. I’ve been through much worse lately!”. “Everyone calm down!”, Hank said. “Nina, you did go against the club. You broke our trust…”. “At the time, you didn’t even know Bishop was in on it; so, on top of that, you went against the president’s direct orders”, Riz said. Creeper nodded in agreement.

“Ok”, Nina said. Every face at the table turned to her. “What? You wanted me to apologize? I was trying to save your asses”. “Technically, she did”, Coco said. He grabbed a cigarette from his back and lit it; before sliding both the pack and his lighter down the table to Nina. She took one of the smokes, and lit it; sending Coco a slight smile. “If we’d gone to war with VM… fuck”, Coco said, visibly shuddering. “We voted for war”, Creeper said. “You didn’t seem like that’s what you wanted at the time…”, Gilly said. “But that’s how this shit works!”, Creeper said. “This club is a democracy…”. “El Padrino was in on it”, Angel said. “At the end of the day…”. “He doesn’t call the shots here”, Riz said.

Nina took a deep drag of her cigarette. “Riz… I’m sorry you’re angry that I went against the club by going with Taza. I’m not gonna apologize for actually doing it, though. If the plan he told me about had worked out, it would have been the best move for your club. That’s a fact you can’t deny”. Unable to come up with a reply, Riz shrugged in something resembling agreement. “It didn’t work out, though”, Creeper said. “That’s not my fault”, Nina retorted. “And honestly, I think your butthurt mostly has to do with the fact that another woman managed to trick you”. “Nina…”, Angel said warily. Creeper’s expression grew saddened. “If you’re talking about Camille, you’re right. She got to me. But that was just a fling with a hangaround…”. His brows furrowed, and he shook his head defeatedly. “You’re family… You were supposed to have our back… My back. Not lie to me”. Nina swallowed thickly, feeling choked and ashamed. “You’re right… I’m sorry for lying. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t trust me anymore; but I understand it”. She sighed deeply. “I’ll take whatever punishment the club decides to give me”. “There won’t be no punishment”, Angel said. “If there is, I’m out of here”. “Angel!”, Nina exclaimed. “Nah, mami… They ain’t touching you”.

“We’re not going to punish Nina”, Hank declared. “She’s right. Taza’s fake plan would have been a good move; and she did what she did to help the club. She wasn’t a part of the official vote, and she’s not a patch. She doesn’t owe us to follow orders; and she didn’t owe us to try to help the way she did”. He looked deep into Nina’s eyes. “You risked your life for the MC… Thank you”. Angel relaxed in his seat. “I get what you’re saying, but…”, Creeper began. Hank slammed his fist into the table. He looked angrier than Nina had ever seen him; but then again, digging through her memories, she’d never seen him angry. “I’ll be happy to take it to a vote; but even with Angel stepping out for being biased, it still looks like punishment will be off the table”. Creeper raised his hands in defeat, and leaned back in his seat.

“If no one else has anything to say, then let’s get to why we’re here”, Hank said. “Nina, what’s your view on what happened the other day?”. Nina took another drag of her cigarette. “Taza called. He said he had a way of avoiding a full-blown war, and asked me to meet him; so we could go see Palo”. “Did you know he’d told Palo that he would hand you over?”, Riz asked. “Yes…”, Nina said, meeting Angel’s eyes for a short second. Anger ghosted his face, but he held his tongue. “He told me we’d be able to reason with Palo, and I thought so too. He seemed about to go for it as well, but… He said he wanted his pound of flesh; and that’s when they brought in Angel”. “Which wouldn’t have happened if…”, Bishop began. “Fuck you, Bish’!”, Angel said. “You ain’t president right now. I’d be happy to show you around the cage…”. “Angel!”, Hank said. “Nina, please…”. “Palo wanted me to shoot Angel, but Bishop and the rest of them arrived in time to…”. She couldn’t finish the sentence; feeling tears welling up. “Taza killed Palo, and that was it”, she finished, and wiped her eyes. “And how do you feel about being lied to about what the real plan was?”, Riz asked. “Come on, Riz…”, Coco said. “I’m not trying to stir shit up, man”, Riz said. “We asked her to come here, to tell us about her experience with all this”. “Yeah, but this ain’t Oprah”, Gilly said. “It’s fine… I’ll answer”, Nina said. “I feel like shit. My decision to go with Taza on this, was based on me not wanting anyone else to get hurt… But Sala was shot, and Palo’s neck was slit right in front of me”. She stubbed out her cigarette. “I might be safe from VM and Palo, but it came at the cost of even more lives… Daniella; Camille; Sala; Palo… Those were all because of me, and what I did to Gael in that alley two months ago…”.

Self-hatred washed over her, and she got her feet. “I don’t think you should punish Bishop, or kick Taza out of the MC… All of this is my fault. I’m sorry I came here and messed up your club”. Ignoring the pain in her leg, Nina stormed out of templo. EZ and Chucky – who’d come in to the clubhouse, while she was in templo – gave her confused looks, as she ran out of the clubhouse, and slammed the door shut behind her. She sat down on the stairs, and buried her face in her hands, letting her tears fall.

The door opened and closed behind her, and she looked up; confused to see Creeper sit down next to her. “This isn’t your fault, Nina”, he said. “I thought you were pissed at me…”. “I was… I am. But not because I think you’re to blame for all this. You worried me… us. Putting yourself in danger like that…”. He sighed deeply. “The thing about you going behind our backs… You’re a part of the family. I expected you to act like a patch; but that’s not fair. We won’t let you wear a cut, so I can’t assume that you’ll act like you are”. “I’m sorry for tricking you”, Nina croaked. “I should never have come here… You lost your president, your VP… You almost went in to full on war!”. Creeper put his arm around Nina’s shoulders. “We haven’t decided on Bishop and Taza yet”, he said. “And war with the Vatos has been under way for a long time. Even before you got here”.

Nina sighed, and looked intently at Creeper. “Don’t punish Bishop and Taza. Don’t take away their flashes”, she said. “They had to make a quick decision; and they wouldn’t have done it if they didn’t think they were doing what was best for the MC… Just because they’re leaders, doesn’t mean they’re infallible. Give them a chance”. Creeper narrowed his eyes at her. “I know Angel said you were smart; but that was almost sage wisdom”, he smirked. “Where do you get it from?”. Nina let out a soft laugh, and wiped her eyes. “I knew a guy who had to make a lot of hard decisions”, she said. “Some of them were really shitty, but they all came from a place of love for his club and his family”. Creeper pressed a kiss to her forehead; then got to his feet, and helped Nina up to stand. “I’ll tell them what you said”, he smiled. “But I won’t use words like infallible. I don’t think half of them know what that means”. There was the sound of glass shattering from inside the clubhouse. “You should get back inside. Gilly’s physically holding Angel down in there”.

He supported her weight back to the door, and opened it for her. Chucky was sweeping up a broken beer bottle, and Angel was struggling to get free from Gilly’s grasp on his arms. Nina walked over to him, and as Gilly let him free, Angel wrapped her into his arms. “Are you ok?”, he whispered into her ear. “Yeah… I’m ok”, Nina said. “He…?”. “We’re good. Really”. She got on her toes, and caught his lips in a warm kiss. “Go vote… Make good decisions”. Angel nodded, and stole another kiss from her, before following his brothers back in to templo.

Nina limped over to sit down by a table, and blew out a deep breath. After four days of hiding at the house, eating microwave dinners, and cursing her own inability to cook; she was overjoyed when EZ came over, and placed a Tupperware box in front of her. “Gaby?”, she asked with bated breath. “Uh huh”, EZ smiled. “I’m serious, Ezekiel. I will marry her myself, if you don’t!”. The prospect let out a warm laugh, and sat down next to her, producing two forks. Chucky came over with two cold cokes for them, before going over to count the chairs in the room, for some reason. “Chuck? What are you doing?”, EZ asked. “I need to make sure we have enough seats for the wedding”. Nina laughed, feeling herself brighten up slightly.

They were seated, eating straight out of the box, and trying to keep each other’s moods up, when the door opened, and Taza stepped inside; his cut hung over his arm. He nodded solemnly at them, and walked over to the ornate door of templo; seemingly taking a deep breath before stepping inside, and closing the door behind him again. “What do you think that means?”, Nina muttered. “I don’t know…”, EZ said. “Hopefully it’s good news”. He noticed Nina’s strained expression, and squeezed her shoulder. “Are you ok? I know you’re not happy about how things went down…”. Nina sighed. “You all keep telling me I’m family… But they forced me to be a part of something I was trying so hard to avoid. Is that how you treat kin?”. “If family doesn’t know what’s best for them, then maybe… yeah”, EZ said. “Palo wouldn’t have let you go. You’d be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. Hurt feelings; you can get over shit like that. But death is kind of final”. “Maybe… But I wish they’d told me the truth”.

They sat in silence for a long moment. “Is you dad mad at me, for stealing his truck?”, Nina asked quietly. “You parked it by his shop. He was ok”, EZ replied. “Yeah, but…”. “Nina, you make Angel happy; and pap’ sees grandkids in his future”, EZ chuckled. “You can do no wrong in his eyes”. “I’m not pregnant!”. “Not for lack of my brother trying, I’m guessing”, EZ smirked. “We’re not having this conversation!”, Nina said. Ezekiel shrugged in surrender. “Just… If you do make me a tío, don’t let Angel name the baby”. “Why?”. “He named your cat Bug!”, EZ laughed. Nina punched his shoulder. “That was me…”, she pouted.

The door to templo opened, and Hank stepped out, giving them a warm smile. Bishop came out behind him, and they gave each other a warm and very masculine hug. “Thanks for taking the gavel when needed”, Bishop said. “Thanks for taking it back”, Hank smiled. “That chair is uncomfortable”. Nina couldn’t help but smile, and Bishop met her eyes; giving her a half smile in return.

The rest of the Mayans emerged from the room, with Taza coming out lastly; wearing his cut. Nina let out an audible, relieved gasp. Getting to her feet, Angel went over to support her. He let her lean against him, as she walked up to Bishop and Taza. “It looks like we have you to thank for keeping these flashes”, Bishop said. “I think we’ve got more than that to thank you for”, Taza smiled softly. Nina shook her head. “Just… trust your family with the truth in the future. It might be painful, but it’s the better way out”, she said. “Alright”, Bishop said. “Still; thank you…”. Nina grinned at him. “You’re fishing for a hug again, aren’t you…?”. “Yes he is”, Taza said.

Nina put her arms around the president, and hugged him tightly. He gave as good as he got, and turned to whisper in her ear. “I’m sorry, mija…”. “I forgive you”, she replied. Taza was next, and Nina gave him a short kiss on the cheek. “I forgive you too, Scarecrow”. Taza pulled back, and looked down at her. “I’m not that sharp on my Judy Garland, but I’m pretty sure the line is I’ll miss you the most… Are you going somewhere?”. “Nah”, Nina said, and looked around at the faces of her family. “There’s no place like home”.

There was a rumbling of bikes outside, and EZ looked out of the window. “SOA”, he said. Nina took Angel’s hand, and let herself be tucked into his side. “Better break out the Jameson”, she said. “Can’t Chibs drink anything else?”, Angel asked. Nina sighed. “It’s for me…”.

---

Happy, Tig and Rat came through the door, and made a beeline for Nina. It was a clusterhug, that ended with her having to waving her hands in the air, to be allowed to breathe. Once released from their grasp, Nina looked behind them with a confused expression. “Chibs?”, she said quietly. “Outside…”, Tig said. “Did you vote yet?”, Nina asked hesitantly. “What vote?”, Happy asked. “You think we’d take the chance to let Tiggy be president?”. Rat visibly shuddered, and Tig smacked the back of his head; making the younger biker let out a yelp. “We get why he did it”, Tig said. “We didn’t like it, but… He’s not the first SAMCRO president to make decisions behind the club’s back, to protect a family-member”. “That’s what he was doing. You know that”, Happy said. Nina sighed, and began moving towards the door. Rat grabbed her arm to halt her. “Rat, I’m sorry for tricking you, but…”, she began. “No… I get it”, he said. “I just wanted to say; don’t be too hard on him. He loves you”. Nina nodded, and went outside.

Filip was leaning against his bike, when she came down from the porch. “Hi…”, she said quietly. “Hello… I didn’t want to come inside, if you didn’t want me there”, Filip said. “It’s not my house”. “Yes, it is”, he smiled softly. Limping halfway over to him, Filip hurried over to grab Nina’s arm. “Is that leg not doing better?”, he asked. “Yeah. I’m just cutting down on the painkillers”, she said. “Good… That’s smart. But you shouldn’t overexert yourself”.

He led her over to lean against his bike. “How angry are you?”, he asked. “Very… You knew how I felt about the bloodshed… Too many people had died already”, Nina said. “But I understand why you did it. You were trying to protect me”. “I really was, luv’”, Filip sighed. “But it’s like you didn’t respect me enough to make me part of the plan”. “I respected you too much, Nina!”. Filip grabbed her hand, and held it tightly. “You’re too good for decisions like the ones we had to make that day… And what you said about Jax…”. “I shouldn’t have brought him up”, Nina said. “No, you were within your rights to”, Filip said. “But… I think he would have made the same decision, little sister. Anything to keep you safe”.

Sighing deeply, Nina pulled at Filip’s hand, to make him wrap his arms around her. She threw her own arms around his neck. “I love you, big brother…”, she croaked. “But don’t ever lie to me again, or I’ll stab you in the balls with a rusty screwdriver”. “That’s oddly specific”, Filip muttered. “I wanna make sure it’s extra painful”. “Fair enough”.

He kissed her temple, and together they made their way back to the clubhouse.

---

“That’s a long ass ride to take, just to come see me”, Nina said, as she sat on Angel’s lap, surrounded by her SAMCRO brothers. Apparently, the Mayan felt that they’d spent too much time apart in the last four days, and after she came back inside with Filip, he hadn’t left her side. “We never left”, Happy said. “We’ve been staying at Vicky’s… It’s quite comfortable there”, Filip smirked. “Venus good with that?”, Nina asked Tig. “We’ve been doing facetime”, Tig winked at her. “I don’t need any of Vicky’s girls, when I got a woman at home waiting for me”. “You thinking about putting a ring on that?”, Angel asked. “She wants to fully transition first”, Tig shrugged. “I told her, I don’t care, but it’s important to her”.

EZ came over with a tray of shots. “What’s this?”, Rat asked. “Mezcal”, EZ said, and shot a smirk at Nina. “In that case, I’m out”, she said. “Just plain old tequila, then?”, Creeper asked, and set down a full shot glass in front of her. Nina rolled her eyes, and picked up the glass; cheering with the bikers. “It is time for us to go, though”, Filip declared, once he’d finished his drink. “We have a business to run”. “Wouldn’t want the line in front of the shop get too long”, Angel smirked. “People need their ice-cream”. “We do milkshakes too”, Rat smiled brightly. The rest of the Sons laughed at their endearingly naïve brother, and got to their feet.

Saying goodbye was less melancholic this time around. Nina managed to avoid completely soaking Angel’s shirt, as she hid her face against his chest, after waving goodbye to her Charming brothers; when they drove off the lot. Chucky, on the other hand, had to take a few minutes to himself in the garage. Coco went after him, and they emerged moments later, with Chucky wiping his eyes, as Coco muttered encouraging words in his ear.

After they all went back inside, Bishop cleared his throat. “Yo. Listen up”, he barked. “It’s time to get back to business around here. We’ve got a few runs to prepare for, and the yard looks like shit”. “It’s a scrapyard, jefe”, Coco said. “It’s supposed to look that way”. “Let’s take the day off”, Taza said. “We can get back to it tomorrow”. Bishop grunted in agreement, and the Mayans all looked like excited frat boys. Creeper and Gilly got to work, calling in some hangarounds for an impromptu party.

Nina – tears dry, and peaceful at heart – got on her toes, and kissed Angel’s cheek. “You can stay… I’m not really in the mood for partying”, she muttered. Angel snaked an arm around her waist, and brushed his lips against his ear. “Nah… I’ll go with you. The only party I wanna go to, is in your panties”, he hummed. “You’re so eloquent”, Nina chuckled. “So elegant…”, Angel nodded, and squeezed her butt; before quietly leading her out the clubhouse.

---

“Ow!”. “Sorry, mami… Maybe try turning the other way”. “My hair is stuck in the handlebars…”. “There… You’re free”. “Someone might see!”. “No, we’re good… Fuck! Don’t stop moving like that”. “Ok, yeah… Wow… Angel, please…”. “Fuck, yes! Put your foot on the fender… That’s right. Take it!”. “I’m so close… Angel!”. “You gonna come?”. “Uh huh… Holy, shit… Harder!”. “Me too… You feel so good…”. “Yes!”. “Oh fuck… I’m coming…! Ahh… Shit, I love you…”. “Te amo, papi… Wow. That was…”. “Uh huh…! I can’t believe we pulled it off…”. “Yeah… Now we just gotta figure out how to get your bike out of the front door again”.

---

To be continued…

tags: @cole-winchester @doloreschanal

#angel reyes #angel reyes fic #angel reyes x oc #angel reyes smut #mayans mc #mayans mc fic #ex reyes #coco cruz #sons of anarchy

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stanzoeywade · 4 years

Text

Dating Poppy Min-Sinclair

I lowkey headcanon Poppy to look like blonde Chungha, and omfg she looks so good in this gif.

Summary: An enemies to friends to lovers trope, sign me the fuck up. I hope you guys enjoy and if you want more please like or reblog. If you want to be added to the tag list please reply. :) I'm also working on the third part of my Poppy x MC series and I oop I'm gay.

Taglist: @somewillwin @origmansello @kamilahtrash @poppysminion @captain-hanadeleine

SFW

It was hate at first sight (sure, jan), but in all honesty your first impression of Poppy was that she was gorgeous. The scowl on her face did nothing to change your mind. The very first words she uttered to you was "Oh, sweetheart, you don't have to worry about who she is. It's me you have to worry about.

As soon as those words leave her mouth, the only part of the sentence your brain focuses on is the word 'sweetheart' and the way she said it, voice dripping with sarcasm. It did nothing to stop you from thinking how hot Poppy was.

You're suddenly pulled away by Zoey, who tells you about the whole ranking system and she takes you out to hang out at a speakeasy, with your new outfit.

In order to get your mind off of Poppy, you decide to flirt with the stranger at the bar (who ends up being Professor Kingsley), but even as you spent time and slept with them, all you could imagine was Poppy, and how she would feel under you.

You learn that Poppy was the resident HBIC of campus, and a sort of rivalry forms between the two of you.

Poppy won't admit it to anyone but she actually found you attractive when she first saw you, even though you were wearing non-designer clothes. Probably annoyed that she actually found you attractive, she acts extra mean, because she's confused and not good with feelings. (PB please let me romance Poppy)

Not anyone is safe from Poppy's wrath, and its extra hard for you because she becomes extra mean, her words are harsher and actually stings a little.

Poppy seems shocked that you actually got hurt, and opens her mouth about to apologise until she remember that she's the queen bee, she doesn't apologise.

You don't back down and insults are exchanged between the two of you, whenever you meet or bump into each other.

Poppy actually starts to look forward to your banter with each other, and she makes an effort to bump into you a bit more.

When you learn of Kick-off day, you and the quarterbacks team up to create a performance for half-time.

Poppy for sure gets annoyed because who do you think you are trying to compete with her, the queen of Belvoire.

After you show her up and kiss Zoey, she feels a pang of jealousy, which she mistakes and takes out as anger against you. She has a meltdown, breaks up with Carter and everyone stares and start to berate her.

Poppy walks out the field and you run after her, feeling shitty because even if she was mean, she didn't deserve to be shit on in public like that. You feel really bad and run after Poppy to make sure she's okay.

You catch up to Poppy find her all the way on the other side of the campus, she's by herself and you see her crying her eyes out. Her eyes are red, and once you see her your heart breaks a little because seeing her like that made you feel like the worst human being, especially since she was crying because of you. Even though, she's crying she looks as beautiful as ever and you can't help but stare.

You approach her and she notices and sneers at you. "Come to kick me when I'm down? Go ahead, newbie. Here's your chance."

And if you thought you couldn't feel worse, you felt you heart break even more as the words escapes her lips.

You put your hands up in surrender and let out a sigh. "Look, you don't have to believe me but I just really wanted to apologise. Even if you were being mean, you don't deserve that." She eyes you suspiciously and says "What's it to you if I'm upset, Farmsville? Just fuck off, I don't need your pity."

Not backing down, you stare at her in the eyes and say sincerely. "I never really wanted to be part of this stupid ranking thing you guys have, I don't even want to be the queen bee. Especially, if it means that you or anyone else gets hurt in the process."

Poppy looks at you stunned, like she can't decipher why you're being so nice to her, and you continue "Plus, I can't say I didn't enjoy our banter, that was fun." You wink at her cheekily and she can't help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation.

You smile at her softly, happy that you managed to make her feel a little but better and you realise that Poppy has such a soft laugh and you want to hear it again.

Poppy's eyes soften as she stops crying. She looks at you and says "Thanks Farmsville, I needed that." You don't know whether your eyes are playing trick on you but you can swear that you can see her blush.

Meanwhile, Poppy feels her cheeks burn and her heart beat a bit faster. 'Damn you for being sweet.'

Smiling sincerely, you ask "Truce?" and Poppy raises her eyebrow at you amused but agrees albeit nonchalantly.

This then starts your sort of friendship with Poppy, but instead of hurling insults at each other, the both of you engage in playful banter (no one knows that you guys are friends). She turns a bit softer, in a way where she always looks at you with an inquisitive gaze to check if you were okay with the banter.

Cue the late night messages, where the both of you stay up late to talk about random nonsense that happened that day, or when Poppy's annoyed she sends you rants where she complains about how stupid everyone is, and vice versa.

Both of you being confused af because is she flirting with me or is she being nice???? (basically is he gay or European but lesbian) The two of you have each other's back, if someone says shit about either of you the other one is quick to defend. Zoey notices your change in attitude towards Poppy and she asks why you're defending your "enemy". You shrug it off by saying "If they're gonna say shit, they should say it to her face, not talk behind her back." Zoey finds that a little bit suspicious, but she doesn't say anything.

This then leads to an actual good support system for both of you, and an actual friendship is formed.

This is when Poppy realises that she actually has feelings for you, and she's quick to yeet out of there, because ewww feelings. She starts to act distant and you're confused because you think you did something wrong.

It's not that Poppy wants to avoid you, she's just really confused about her feelings and she doesn't want to ruin the friendship you two have. Chloe notices that Poppy is acting weird and decides to confront her about it.

Whilst Chloe is usually oblivious, even she suspects that something is going on between the two of you, and she begins to ask Poppy questions. That's when she finds out that Poppy has feelings for you. After her small 'EUREKA!' moment Chloe decides to tease Poppy, and queen bee is not amused. "If you tell anyone that I have a crush on her, I will have you cremated and eaten by the dogs." yells Poppy as Chloe just laughs in amusement.

Chloe lowkey trying to be a wingman, but Poppy tells her off and you just think that Chloe's just being weird, and it just confuses you even more. Like what???

Mutual pining, because the both of you are too stubborn to confess how you feel. Poppy just doesn't even know what to do because feelings. And you don't know whether she likes you back and don't want to risk your newfound friendship with her.

Cue Poppy seeing you flirt with someone else, (Carter, Zoey or Veronica or whoever) and Poppy loses her shit because she's jealous.

Thinking with anger and not her head, Poppy decides to kiss you in front of the whole school. Long story short, everyone sees and it's all over social media, that's how they find out that the queen bee has staked her claim.

Poppy is touch starved and craves affection. This probably comes with the fact that her parents weren't really the affectionate type, which is why she acts the way she does. Her parents probably ingrained it into her head that she has to be #1 for everything and anything below that is the same as being nothing.

She would never admit it but Poppy adores cuddling and lazy days where the both of you just chill out and share soft and sweet kisses, in which neither of you stop until your lips are bruised.

She's also the little spoon (fite me), and you don't mind because she's so soft and you're weak for her.

Poppy is also the type to pamper you with expensive ass gifts, even when you tell her that she doesn't have to give you anything, but it makes her happy so you're happy.

Waking up next to her is probably the equivalent of seeing an angel. She looks so peaceful when she's asleep and you can't help but stare because you don't have the heart to wake her up.

Poppy can't cook for shit, because why would she need to know how to cook, she's rich??? Probably so bougie she's never had fast food in her life, so the first thing you do is take her ass to McDonald's.

Arguments usually occur when both of you are stressed and this leads to angry make out sessions where both of you are marked up with hickeys for everyone to see.

This girl needs some TLC, so please be gentle and patient because she's not used to affection.

NSFW HCs

People probably think that Poppy's a pillow princess and sometimes you joke and tease her about it, but in all honesty she can top. Her strap game is impeccable, 10000/10 would reccomend again.

When you go down on her she always tugs at your hair, and you can't help but groan as her nails brush against your scalp. Additionally when she's bottoming, she becomes a little bratty and you have no choice but to play rough and she doesn't mind.

When the two of you argue, this can lead to some intense angry sex, all bets are off when you're arguing, everything is messy, rough and passionate. The two of you don't remember the reason why you were arguing after.

The moans, groans and noises that comes out of Poppy's mouth is music to your ears. It's probably the sexiest thing you've ever heard, and you can't get enough.

When she rides the strap, it's the hottest thing you've ever seen. The way her sweat clings to her body making it glisten, and the way her body moves and convulses as she's riding makes you go insane. 10000/10 would do again.

The type to annoy you by sexting you in class, purposely riling you up, she especially enjoys annoying you when it's Professor Kingsley's class because she's petty like that. It gets to the point where you're so riled up that you just get up and leave class. She loves sending you photos with nothing on but her underwear, almost always pink or white. It's one of her favourite past times really. You can't even get angry because each photo is so good so you can't complain.

She's also the type of girl to get flustered when you sext her back, and it's honestly the cutest thing. It becomes a game of who can rile up the other person more.

These are just my headcanons and you don't have to agree with them hope you enjoyed reading. :)

#poppy min sinclair #poppy x mc #queen b poppy #queen b choices #queen b #queen b zoey #veronica lombardi #playchoices #choices stories you play #choices hcs #this is just my headcanons #makepoppyali2020 #poppydailychallenge #squint squint im working on another part of the fic but enjoy this first lmaoooooo #chloe st. james #chloe queen b

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444piscesprincess · 3 years

Text

childhood friends to lovers/growing up together sterek fic reclist

uhh this kinda got a lil angsty but i recommend you pick a growing up together fic and listen to this song i promise you will not regret it

https://open.spotify.com/track/5Dz8nrwQlPLE68WaTEIqY5?si=aogjMc1aToSALmAlfQOR7A

anyways as usual check tags please!!

(click on the title for the fic)

you know you're on my mind

bibliosexual

Summary:

If there’s one thing Derek’s learned in life, it’s that crushing on someone who lives on an entire other fucking continent is probably a bad idea.

(hs!au + texting!au + childhood friends to lovers the ULTIMATE fluff fic)

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) (series)

yodasyoyo

Summary:

Stiles is six years old when he first hears Derek's voice in his head.

Or what happens if you have a soulmate bond, in a universe where soulmate bonds don't exist?

Up Down Lock Unlock

isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)

Summary:

“Why are you going into grandma Ito’s apartment?” he asked.

Derek turned to him, key sliding into the lock. “What do you mean?” He tried to turn it, but the key wasn’t budging. Maybe the lock was sticking again, it’d been doing that the past few days.

Stiles was staring at him like Derek was stupid.

Derek did not appreciate sass from a ten year old.

“That’s grandma Ito’s place.”

“No,” Derek said calmly, pulling the key out and then shoving it back in, wiggling it a little when it continued to refuse to unlock the door. “This is my place.”

“I think you’re on the wrong floor then, because that apartment belongs to grandma Ito.”

(time travel counts as childhood friends right?)

the difference between going back and going home

thepsychicclam

Summary:

Stiles and Derek were inseparable growing up, but then college, jobs, and life happened. When Stiles comes back to Beacon Hills a decade later, he doesn't expect to reconnect with Derek, and he sure doesn't expect to fall in love with him.

It's Such a Gas When You Bring Up the Past

orphan_account

Summary:

Stiles finds a box of old photo albums that dredge up the sweet, the funny, the adorable, and the mildly heartwrenching parts of his and Derek's past.

(mainly a friends fic but its too cute to not include)

It's Always Been You

charlesdk

Summary:

Stiles' love life was practically non-existing, always had been. He was always terrible at picking up clues when people hit on him (it had happened, Erica had been witness to it and had been the one to let him know it was happening in the first place) because he never expected anyone to do so.

He wasn't the most desirable guy around, he knew that. He was loud, extremely nerdy, never knew when to stop talking, not exactly much of a looker if you asked him, the list was endless.

Point was, he never did know when someone was flirting with him. Which was probably how he ended up in the fight that would change his life for the better.

Lead You Home Again

GotTheSilver

Summary:

The first time Derek meets Stiles, the kid’s brown eyes are wide, and he’s staring up at him with a mischievous grin as he tugs at the arm of Derek’s first ever Batman figure like he’s trying to separate it from Batman’s body.

An alternate take on Teen Wolf, wherein Stiles and Derek are childhood friends, and things unfold from there.

Kingdom By The Sea

kilaem

Summary:

Lydia grabs his arm and pulls him down in the seat next to her. “When the hell did you find time to bag a guy like Hale?”

“We’re friends,” Stiles feels his face heat up, and then the team are running out and Derek sees him and smiles. His blush gets worse.

“Oh really?”

“Our moms were friends, okay? We’ve been in diapers together.”

“I thought you two hated each other.”

Those That Bump In The Night

bleep0bleep

Summary:

A boy’s head appears upside down, hanging off the bed. “Is anyone there?” he calls out curiously, looking right at Derek’s eyes. Caught, then. The protocol for being deliberately seen by a child is just to look as strange and fearsome as possible. No one would believe them, anyways. But Derek is tired, and he’s been running and scared, and now he just kind of flickers, curling out a tendril of dark smoke, hoping that he’s a little bit scary. No such luck. The boy’s eyes widen. “Oooh, are you the bogeyman?” “Bogeyperson,” Derek says, before he can help himself.

When Stiles was a boy, he had an imaginary friend named Derek. Ten years later, Derek comes back, and is very, very real.

Five Times Derek and Stiles Kissed For Practice (And One Time They Didn't)

mikkimouse

Summary:

In which Derek and Stiles grow up together and practice kissing, roughly in that order.

216 + 1: Words To Say Instead of I Love You

briggs

Summary:

Derek and Stiles have been best friends for fourteen years. They have their differences, sure, but it's never been a question for them. Their friendship has been the most solid thing in their lives -- until suddenly it isn't anymore.

Funny how just a few choice words can throw fourteen years of friendship off-balance.

a collection of "Bro, That's Gay" one-shots that actually ended up turning into a concrete storyline.

hope is the thing with feathers (part of a series)

ShanaStoryteller

Summary:

Stiles is ten when he saves the Hales from their burning home and Derek from a wolfsbane bullet, and this establishes a pattern that seem to continue indefinitely.

"Then he's facing a burning home, and he wraps the hood of his sweatshirt around his mouth before he pushes the door open and steps inside. There's Mr. Hale asleep - he hopes asleep - on the couch, next to - Stiles thinks that's his brother but there are so many Hales, who can keep track. He rushes over and starts shaking him, can see the rise and fall of the man's chest so he knows he's alive, but he's not waking up. He shoves away his hood so he can shout, "Mr. Hale! You have to get up, there's a fire! Mr. Hale, get up!" Nothing, he's not even twitching, both of them taking in deep even breaths like they're having the most peaceful of rests, and Stiles is going to cry. "Wake up, wake up, wake up!" There's a moment, where all Stiles can hear is the blood rushing in his ears and not the roar of the flames or the creak of wood, then with a violent, silent pop it's all back and both of the men are gasping awake, eyes open and jumping to their feet. "

(one of my favourite fics like EVER)

it came from the trees

whatshouldntbe

Summary:

“Don’t worry, Scott caught me up on everything,” Kira assures with a bubbly smile via video-chat. “You and Derek, huh? I probably should have seen that coming. I always thought it might be Cora, but Derek was the one that looked at you how I used to look at you.”

Stiles goes a little pink. “It’s still kinda new but, yeah. I really like him. He’s...” Beautiful. Patient. Smart. Painfully honest. Sweet.“...a total dork.”

Kira laughs and laughs. When she gets herself together, she replies, “Yeah, those little hearts and stars in your eyes definitely say different."

Stiles moves from the shiny, fast-paced lifestyle of Los Angeles to the foggy, sleepy town of Beacon Hills so his dad can become the new sheriff. Newly fifteen, he does his best to finish out his freshman year of high school (by staying under the radar) when he suddenly becomes the Beyoncé of the Supernatural community. And, without much prompting on his part, he ends up catching the eye of one of the most prominent Werewolf families in all of North America. It literally all starts with a stuffed animal(s).

(oh god this fic is the literal best even though its abandoned it ends at okay-ish place. this is one of the best hale family characterisations ive ever read. if you squint it can be a childhood friends to lovers fic but im including it anyway bc its amazing)

Promises aren't Meant to be Broken

paradis

Summary:

“Thanks for saving me,” Stiles blurts out, staring up at Laura, wide eyed.

Laura grins. “I like you,” she says, “we’ll be friends.”

(more laura and stiles besties centric but totally worth a read)

The Things We See

MelodramaticSalad

Summary:

Stiles grew up in the life of knowing that there was always more to life than what others saw with a first glance. Even as a child he saw things that no one else seemed to and always had a fascination with the unusual.

Some considered him an unusual child, but Claudia welcomed every single quirk her son displayed. His mother had a few special talents of her own and thrilled her to see it in her son as well. She'd raised Stiles to always keep his mind open and as grew and started to display his powers, she began to teach him how to use them. She even taught Stiles about werewolves at a young age, his infatuation with them growing once he had learned the truth about her closest friend.

Stiles spent nearly every possible moment that he could roaming the Hale house, following after the middle child most of the time. Derek was three years older than Stiles, but the bond they developed with each other was something their mothers considered out of a story book. Like Derek, Stiles was sensitive to his emotions, but unlike Derek, Stiles didn't need a scent to figure it out. He could feel it.

take me back

matildajones

Summary:

“I dare you to kiss me,” Stiles taunts, and he’s not expecting the way Derek says a naughty word under his breath and then leans forward.

Stiles yelps. He just dodges Derek’s mouth before he’s laughing wildly and running through the trees, calling out a series of ew ew ew as Derek chases him back home.

#sterek #sterek fic recs #childhood friends to lovers #au #growing up toget #reclist #teen wolf #stiles stilinski #derek hale #hale pack

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missorgana · 3 years

Text

looks a lot like christmas

pairing: alex/willie, background julie/luke

fandom: julie and the phantoms

rating: general

word count: 1634

warning: swearing, referenced homophobia, dysfunctional family

summary: It's the first Christmas in the afterlife, and Alex misses Willie. (first christmas together, canon compliant)

(my 12 days of fanfiction event is now upon us!!! thank you @sayankotor for the prompt, i hope you enjoy this ❤️ and don’t forget, you can still send me prompts if you haven’t already!)

read on ao3

Alex is anxious. Then again, when is he not?

He certainly didn’t expect this to continue after he, well, died, yet here he is.

After meeting Julie, getting to perform again, Caleb’s curse, him and his boys not disappearing forever, let’s just say there’s been a lot going on. Some peace and quiet serves him right, Alex thinks.

Oh, but meeting Willie, that was also something. Something completely different, so Alex doesn’t quite know where to place this feeling fluttering behind his chest.

In all honesty, he hasn’t seen Willie since they said their goodbyes. Of course not, the shorter boy thought he would fade away. Whether that be by the hands of Caleb or their own salvation.

Alex misses him. Of course he bloody does.

Luke and Reggie’s been comforting about it, even assured him he’d see Willie again, but Alex isn’t that sure.

He doesn’t know where he is, but he’s scared. What won’t Caleb do if he finds out the skater boy helped them out of his grasp?

And, of course, because Alex is just so obvious, according to Luke, he wishes he’d said something to Willie.

Something like a reply to the shorter boy’s line in the club.

“There’s a lot to like here.” What’s that supposed to mean? Alex knows what he wants it to mean, but he was so shell shocked, he didn’t even react. He let Willie walk away.

And, oh, “I’d do anything for you.”

Luke likes to remind Alex just how not straight that sentence was, but the irrational fear in him still can’t help those nagging doubts in his head.

But why think of those when it’s Christmas, right?

That’s how Reggie gets him out of his own head. He’s always looked forward to Christmas, sometimes with a frightening obsession, but it’s nice of him to use it as a distraction, as well.

They’re good friends. Too good. Julie too, who lets them help decorate, with Carlos as well, of course, letting him in on their little family secret with their dad blissfully unaware. Alex is sure he wouldn’t mind.

In fact, while their dad’s at work, Julie and the boys work on the Christmas tree as a team effort.

There’s barely any tree visible at this point, presents filled up on the floor, Julie taking a hold of the glass ornaments, so the ghosts don’t risk smashing anything, and themselves focusing on glitter, light chain and the like.

She teaches them to fold these paper decorations, too, and Luke laughs at Reggie’s overly eager running about.

Julie takes Luke’s hand for a moment.

It’s different now that they can actually touch, and Luke smiles shyly. Maybe that just makes Alex miss the skater boy more.

But, of course, before Christmas day, the boys want to pay a visit to their families. Reggie found both his parent’s new homes, a month after it all went down, and despite it all, it gives him some peace looking after them.

Same goes with Luke, who receives a kiss on his cheek before poofing out.

And, well, that leaves Alex. He does poof out, too, giving the brightly smiling girl a wave, despite her eyes definitely looking through his facade.

Alex knows where his family is, just as much as his boys. And that’s where he goes. He’s not quite sure how much peace, or warmth, or fulfillment that brings him, though.

He rather just deems it a necessary thing to get done.

…

As Alex poofs into the stark white house at the end of the road, lavender painted window sills at the courtesy of his mom, and space enough for a garden for the dog, just like the old days, he’s ready to be let down.

He’s already been that anyway, he’s used to it.

When Alex went here for the first time since they died, just a month ago, actually, he was shocked at just how little had changed.

Inside, too. Living room seemed untouched since he ran away to sleep in the garage with the boys. Only difference being the huge portrait of himself over the fireplace.

That surprised Alex, too.

His father didn’t look at him the same way since he came out, and even though his mother didn’t admit to not accepting him, the sad look she gave him hurt even more than the spiteful words said to his face, for some reason.

Alex thought he was lucky his brother wasn’t home to hear it, which is just as depressing as everything else.

They’ve stuck with the traditional Christmas family gathering, still. And just beneath his own face staring back at him, on the mantelpiece, was the angel that always had its home there for the holidays.

It’s almost like the family used his death to forget what made him run away. Or rather, made them push him out, because God knows he didn’t want to be, excuse his language, fucking homeless at the age of 17.

Is it too tragic that dysfunctional families are what tied him and the boys together, made them inseparable? Perhaps.

Alex’s mother still had that sad look in her eyes when she looked at his portrait. Well it’s fair enough, if she hadn’t acted like that when he was alive, too.

But after mulling the thoughts from his first visit over, he didn’t have the energy to be bitter anymore. He’s just disappointed in them.

And Luke and Reggie, and Julie were right every time they told him it’s his family’s loss, and immediately stopped him in his tracks when he tried to blame himself, or regret he ever told them.

Now he can sit beside that very fireplace, and observe his strained family eat of the Christmas dinner, a painful silence settled on the resident.

Way to have Christmas cheer, huh.

Except, a poof, a sound he’s oddly familiar with by now sounds from the entrance. Alex expects it to be one, or both of the boys, picking him up on the way back to Julie because he hasn’t watched the time.

It’s a boy he knows, but one he’s missed.

Willie.

He doesn’t even contain the surprise to his own head, but says it out loud, he realises, when the skater ghost is standing in the archway, looking at Alex like a lost treasure.

There’s this feeling in his stomach like the first time they met, which is insane because they’re dead , he’s not supposed to stomach aches, or any aches for that matter.

“Hey, hotdog.”

Alex probably looks like a computer in shut down mode. It’s okay though, he supposes, since his silence doesn’t scare the shorter boy from sitting down next to him.

Okay. Calm down. Butterflies in his stomach, ghost butterflies, what the fuck?

The boy, now next to him, who’s just too pretty for Alex to process, duh, he’s been since the first day, puts his gaze on the gathering in front of them.

He can hear the fire crackling behind him, and he feels warm. Because of blushing, more likely.

Can ghosts even blush? He doesn’t have blood anymore, for God’s sake.

Alex ends up interrupting Willie when he tries to say something, stupid, yet the skater boy urges him to continue first.

“How’d you know where to find me?” he finds himself asking. Not “Where have you been?”, like a rational person. But he never claimed to be rational, did he?

Willie smiles softly. Fuck.

“I have my ways.” is all Alex gets, and instead of elaborating, he takes this as his cue to talk, “They’re not big on the holidays?”

Alex turns back to the dinner table, and the thick, uncomfortable aura.

If they knew he was there, watching them, all hell would break loose. Or if he was still alive, probably more so. He hates that thought.

He gives Willie a shrug, “They used to. I guess a dead gay son kills the mood.”

Alex got that sarcastic, borderline depressing humor from time to time. It’s not something that came with death, but perhaps, a bit more recurring now.

Reggie, the ever optimist and dork he is, always made it a mission to scold him for those kinds of jokes, and that’s what friends are supposed to do, right?

Willie looks at him. Concerned, but understanding. Alex’s not sure how he knows, but trust him, he just does.

“At least you got a portrait.”

And that’s where Alex takes his chance, “Where have you been?”

The words seem harsh, but Willie smiles again, so maybe it’s his own overthinking taking a toll.

“Avoiding Caleb, mostly.”

“Did… I-did he do something? To you?”

And the boy, an angel , more like, knows those nervous eyes, it seems, and for some reason, thanks to whatever good forces out there, he takes his hand.

“You worry too much.” is all he says.

Well, he’s not wrong. Definitely not the first time he’s heard that statement.

Also, that’s not in any way an answer to his question, but Alex has developed a feeling of when he shouldn’t ask further.

Willie doesn’t seem as distraught as he expected. It’s weird, because just like before after all that mess, he reappears into his life- uh, well, afterlife, just as randomly as the many times before.

He’s soft. Alex doesn’t have other words to describe him, at all, like in the Hollywood Ghost Club.

And he even convinces himself to form words, an invite to Julie’s, not willing to risk the skater boy disappearing in front of him, too soon, too often, but Willie reads his mind all over again, “You wanna get out of here?”

Alex sighs in relief.

It’s warm now, the silence, because of the boy next to him. He’d rather prefer that warmth somewhere… warmer, in general. Not here.

“Please.”

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