#let's see how lucky I am

[raplinenthusiasts]

BTS x Major Arcana

for @dearedwardteach 🖤 {cr. namuspromised / psd / cards}

#HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST PERSON ON THIS ENTIRE SITE <3 #i'm late and i'm so so sorry #i had entirely different thing planned but it was awful and then i found this template and it made me think of you immediately! #i hope you like it #bts #btsgif #dailybts #dailybangtan #userbangtan #btsedit #*mine #ot7 #sabri i have no words to describe how lucky i am to get to know you #you wished on my birthday to go to concert together and now look at us! we have two booked! #i cannot wait march to see you <3 #i hope you will have great year full of happiness and kind people and so much love! #ily fr <3 #disclaimer: i know nothing about tarot cards or anything like that #i went with general descriptions #so please let me know what you think about my choices! it's actually very interesting! #if there are any typos or anything please don't tell me or i'll cry

[silenthillbunni]

🐰🌧️

#so on my way home.. #i walked by a school and besides the fact that i felt so depressed bc just looking at these kids and adults i have NO hope for the future #i saw two boys on a bench as i walked by... and i just thought they were talking. and too late i realized that no one of the boys were #bullying the other boy. the bully walked away and the other boy just sat there looking so lifeless and dejected #a teacher came and sat down w that boy and i just kept walking. even if i wanted to say smth it's like what would i even do abt that situati #that made me so sad both bc that boy.. he looked so dejected and used to it. that anxiety going to school knowing you're bullied is awful #and like i imagined talking to him and saying heyyy if you're lucky you'll grow up to be 25yrs old #live like a parasite off your mom and be on wellfare and never have had a job :) #you'll have no education or highschool diploma :) you will still struggle to finish hs even at an easier level :) #you will also not have had friends in 10yrs and you'll be terrified of ppl and getting close to anyone and even going outside!! #you'll have no interests and hobbies and skills! you'll simply be a waste of space loser being a burden on everyone around u! #whoop whoop stay alive buddy it will only get worse ❤️ #god i just wanna cry. how did i let my life turn out this way??? i used to be full of dreams and life and passion and HOPE #i used to believe in things and in people. i had so many dreams and i wanted to try and do so many things #now all i can think is 'i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die'. im miserable wherever i go lmao #there's this bridge over the highway i have to cross when i walk to school and every time i look down at the trafic and when a truck drives #by i feel my entire body vibrate. i just wanna jump and get mauled by it. #or i dont *want* to but i feel so deeply and desperately that it's the only way for me #only way to make it stop hurting. and i am weak. i dont know how to just 'stop' or take control of my life. thats why i wanna die #bc i know that i wont be able to. that my life will never amount to anything #for fuck's sake my dream now is just to have my own 1bedroom apartment and have a shitty job - like in a grocery store or whatever!!!!! #not even that can i make happen! bc im so worthless i cant do anything. im also stupid so i wouldnt be able to do my job right #i dont know... i dont know... these feelings and thoughts are too much i just wanna relax #but i cant bc my ribs hurt and idk if it's heartburn or an ulcer 💀 why am i even alive???? what am i doing all this for? 😭 #my thoughts ran away but i meant like seeing that reminded me of how much of a failure i became #bc of my circumstances and all the shitty ppl around me thru out my life

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

Poor Yuuta 😆

What's he gonna do when someone tells him Todo punched His Boy™️ through a wall

And really, what's with every person ripping of their shirt or being shirtless while fighting Megumi. Sukuna is the worst offender of course, and their's also Todo, even Mahoraga didn't have a shirt. We're obviously excluding Toji.

Also, being offended at a low bounty is so Sukuna 🤣 That entire post was hilarious, especially the tags.

The other second years decide that they need to shield Yuuta from the knowledge that this ever happened because if he did he’d kill todo and then feel bad about killing him and it’s just be enormously inconvenient to maki specifically who would have to hear about it.

They also decide that this is immediately a mission doomed for failure because Inumaki’s a spineless simp who will absolutely spill the beans to his boy (his boy being Yuuta).

So they tell Todo that if he values his life (doubtful—maki has sincere doubts as to its value and feels even todo must know that) he’ll find a border and get over it because Yuuta will break his fucking spine if he finds out someone beat the shit out of Megumi specifically as a way to goad Yuuta himself. Fuck around, find out. Yuuta’s not letting anyone use megumi against him and he’s willing to make an example to ensure future safety.

Sukuna feels the Zenin were on point with the brat’s valuation (if not too generous) but he’s in here too and he’s a fucking gold standard of targets. What the fuck why is the bounty so low. He’s the king of curses and he’s getting the valuation of an idiot high schooler with a crush. There’s no respect nowadays.

Yuuji has to hear a lot about how the price on his head is not good enough for Sukuna.

#sukuna at three am the night before a mission: i am nightmare incarnate they could BANKRUPT themselves to kill me and it would not be enough #what the fuck is wrong with sorcerers these days. brat you want to fix the in-law problem and you let me out on the Zenin compound. ten #minutes. they’ll see who’s worth a mere /800000 yen/. fucking unprofessional is what it is. #yuuji is somewhat tempted he cannot lie #the Zenin stress his boyfriend out a lot okay #he sees how much they can get to him. and also like. he doesn’t know the details. but he can read between the lines enough to know they’ve #hurt him. how bad WOULD it be to let Sukuna raze a few buildings to the ground #yuuji has a very pretty boyfriend who will let him /hold his hand/ and /kiss him/ and legitimately life could not be better were it not for #the active attempts on his life. those. those are a downer. #very pretty boyfriend. who’s smarter than him. can summon dogs at will. literally the gold standard cannot imagine how lucky he is but there #HAS to be a fly in the ointment and it HAS to be his lunatic family #the thing is yuuji overwhelmingly feels murder is wrong EXCEPT when you trigger him in which case he’ll kill you with his bare hands #re: mahito #and like. he’s getting there with the Zenin. he’s getting there. #the issue is that makis a fucking vault and Yuuta this impossibly beautiful and perfect son of a bitch in Africa who they’ve never met so #they can’t interrogate him. and inumaki is. challenging. to interrogate #pandas the fucking weak link tho and nobara and yuuji have figured out that the Zenin did something seriously fucked not too long ago #they don’t want to invade Megumi’s privacy but he’s Their Boy and they’ll cut bitches over him #yuuji shares a wall with megumi and sometimes it’s really obviously he had a bad nightmare he won’t talk about #but he will tell him when it wasn’t about sukuna ripping out Yuuji’s heart so he won’t feel guilty #and eventually yuuji just sort of pieced it together that it was about the Zenin #not to be dramatic but Yuuji and nobara will kill people for megumi #why does OKKOTSU YUUTA get to know about their boy but not YUUJI who’s LITERALLY DATING HIM #panda: well Yuuta was right in the middle of everything what with how he— *horrified silence* I’ve said too much #todos no help because he also thinks Yuuta is an impossibly beautiful and perfect bastard and it does not help yuujis morale #he’s on yuujis side of course #but if there is anyone who COULD come even close to his brother who is the sparkling pinnacle of existence it would be Okkotsu Yuuta #no one can tell if todos in love with Yuuta #like obviously his heart and soul belong to takada but it gets hella gay sometimes when he talks about Yuuta #he doesn’t know what this assless boy has done to bewitch such beautiful men and it torments him

[sleepless-in-starbucks]

hey gamers . lucky jumbo 7 might. have a bit of angst in it

#the cryptid speaks #lucky jumbo <3 #OOPS #i can not overemphasis how much this wasnt supposed to happen #ikik crackfic crackseries keeps accidentally getting serious jokes but Not Like This #meri if/when u see this. forgive me :'''') #(crying) all i want to do is put my silly guys in situations..... but i keep putting them into Situations........ /d + j #also sorry not sorry for all the lj posts recently . i am letting the brainrot win <33

[britcision]

Listen. Could Dead and Loving It be a fraction of the length and maybe finished by now if I only focused on Danny and Jason?

Possibly

Would it be a better story?

Probably, from several perspectives

But it absolutely would not be the same story, and nor would it be the story I want to tell

Because I am hopelessly addicted to ensemble casts, and I don’t want the boys to exist in a vacuum. I want Jason to run off with his siblings and with Danny’s friends, and I want Danny to fuck with the bats

I want them to touch all the parts of each others lives that existed before they met, and will still continue to exist after even if things change forever between them

I want all the background characters to interact with each other, have their own inner worlds and their own motivations, and yeah, this absolutely means this is not an efficient telling of a slow burn romance

Because the story isn’t the slow burn romance

The story is these two people, and the world they live in, the story is the way Duke and Cass both see Jason differently than Dick and Tim ever could and that matters, and that none of them are wrong

The story is Danny finally telling people who will listen about the Anti-Ecto Acts, and all the fucked up things the GIW do, and being able to ask for help and have that be okay

The story is messy and complicated and will have so many rises and falls, so many pivotal moments that are drama and combat and so many that are just two people talking to each other and finally seeing eye to eye

The story is the way that Jason’s relationships with his family can finally mend, now that he has someone who can get him the help he’s needed

The story is the way that Danny can come to terms with the responsibilities of being a king, the constant question of agency and power and what he’s worth if he’s only Danny and not the Ghost King

The story is Clockwork fucking with the pair of them because he specifically thinks it’s funny (he’s right)

And yeah, there’s a slow burn romance in there. There’s also a coming of age tale, and a story about healing and reconciling and moving forward knowing you cannot change the past, but you can do better

Unless fucking Clockwork decides you can change the past because yeah then it’s fine to just go do that I guess

I was kinda considering breaking the story out into multiple chunks because holy fuck is 100k an intimidating chunk of words, but I’m not gonna

It’s all one story, and you will be my hapless victims as we get to fucking 300k or wherever this beast ends because we are not here for efficient story telling and motion of the plot

We’re here for the connections, the characters, the meaningless bullshit that would absolutely be cut in anything anyone ever wanted to sell, cuz I am not selling this

Imma write every fucking scene I wish I got from books, TV, movies, podcasts, actual plays, every fucking time I scream at the characters to just fucking talk to each other because messy is good too

Messy is okay

Stories don’t need to be marketable to be worth telling, and this one’s gonna be too long and intimidating for some people and that’s okay

But I fuckin’ rolled in from Critical Role which averages around 500 hours of content per campaign and a cast of 7 plus Matt’s NPCs

And I STILL want more goddamn character moments from all of them so I haven’t found a size yet that I can’t manage

I love reading focused stories that I can get through fast, and fuck, look at the rest of my AO3; I will fucking never diss a one shot, or a short story, or a piece that really focuses in on one or two characters

Delicious, I love them, my bread and butter

It’s just not what this mess is gonna be, and that’s okay too

Gods be fucking willing we will not have another six chapters that take place over the course of three hours, but we’ll just have to see how that shakes out cuz I’m being possessed by a seemingly infinite number of plot bunnies and my own tendency for “hey it’d be funny if”

And oh boy has it been funny every time

#danny fenton dead and loving it #i swear i can do short stories #i’m just not #also yeah 300k if we’re lucky based on my outlines so far #some of this will go faster but we’ll see #totally was gonna let tim just google amity park with tucker’s advice in mind but then #then my brain went ‘hey how funny would it be if danny just forgot they can’t contact amity’ #‘and tim couldn’t find a way around needing the amity park ip’ #so now we get a bunch more frustrated bat sibs #and i regret nothing #fucking adding like 5k to the story but it’s 5k of CRIME #and my sweet beloved darling harley #i did actually read all her comics up to 2018 #only dc character i go for but i am considering some red hood #mostly to see how upset comic store owners get when i ask for my 6’ of babygirl #no business for them if they got that toxic masculinity i only shop where cat maid hood rules #which fucking cannot be found online i’m heartbroken

[facetsofthecloset]

Tbh my life would be pretty perfect right now if my current part time janitoring job paid. Like. A livable wage. Genuinely love doing it, the hours are perfect, I like my coworkers (and don’t have to interact with them much which might contribute to that lol), it leaves me so much time and energy afterward to enjoy my day and live my life—

Except I’m still scraping the bottom of my savings to pay the Existing Fees. Not quite as fast, which is nice, definitely, but like. What if I wasn’t in the red and had this job I think is important and enjoy but also doesn’t consume 110% of my whole life. What then, huh? I might have a good time? I might actually have a chance of kicking my constant SI at some point? Can’t have that can we? Misery is the currency that runs the world isn’t it? Can’t have people having a good time. We might be better off as a society then and that’s not allowed obviously

#still a bit jet lagged so it’s 2 pm and I’m delirious but like #come on #come the fuck ON I could actually be HAPPY it’s like RIGHT there I can fucking see it #it’s just an entire decimal point away #and that might as well be the other side of the universe #ramblings #tbh this is the most optimistic and well-adjusted I’ve managed to be about my life in. well pretty much ever #I am happier than I was and you have no idea how amazing it is to wake up at 5 am and be like ‘alright! let’s get ready and go to work :)’ #and have that be genuine!! not a forced smile hanging onto my last thinning thread! I’m #I walk to work and every day I think ‘it’s a beautiful morning’ #and I come home and think ‘I’m tired but satisfied. let’s take a break and get some chores done’ #and I’ve NEVER been that. idk. FUNCTIONAL in my life before #but this is unsustainable #bc I need to get a different job that pays enough at some point #or replace the time I have to maintain my home with another job #which I know would overtax me and make me miserable unless it was a /perfect/ fit as work for me #it’s not fair #it’s so STUPID #it’s just. INEFFICIENT #and I’m still fairly privileged and lucky #like. fuck. everything is just so fucked

[jinstronaut]

Ok love what you’re doing to gif jin daily however could we change up the clips you’re posting? I feel like I’ve been watching him apply cream for a week straight 😂💗

hi!!!! so let me just be really frank you with -- i'm doing this for free! and i have two (2!!) days off a week, and i have to make certain content last longer so i HAVE clips to post. for free!!!!! to me, as jin is my ult bias, i don't even care if i watch him put face cream on four days in a row -- i'm just happy to see his face and i love and miss him so so much!!!!!!!

so i'm sorry if sometimes things feel repetitive, however!!! as of right now, i've made over 700 gifs!! and we're only in the 200s out of 543 days!!!! so think about how many MORE gifs i get to make during this process!!!!!!!!!!

so you'll forgive me if i stretch things out sometimes so i don't 1) go insane hunting out a million things to clip, 2) use up my 48 hours of free time making gifs non stop like a machine, and 3) get creative block and stop the series altogether when i really, really don't want to do that!!

i'm a very very nice person and i'm very very kind and i never really say anything, but this message (as kindly intended as it could have been) really just... does not read the way you think it does, nonnie! so please remember that people like me -- content creators -- spend all of our time doing the things we do for FREE! i have to find the content, clip the content, color the content, and upload the content all by myself! and i never, ever complain, so please just think about these things before you complain about 3 gifsets (out of over 200!!!) being from the same sequence :) thank you so much!

#today is not the day and i am not the one !!!! #normally i would just delete something like this but let me tell you #i just got promoted at work my schedule is crazy i am lucky to have a day off to contribute to this series which is something i do for FUN #and because i love jin and i miss jin and i want army to have something to focus on during the long periods where we are missing the boys ! #so i dont see how complaining about free content makes sense :) thank you so much god bless #anon #answered #long post // #maybe ill delete this later idk this just rubbed me the wrong way like #everyone can gif the same photoshoot or music video or whatever but i make 4 sets out of a very long sequence and its an issue??? #anyways if you want specific content make it yourself uwu

[definitelynotshouting]

heya i just wanted to tell you how genuinely important your arospec scarian thing is to me

the line "He's not sure what he wants, what's expected of him here" has just helped me solve a tiny crisis i've been having for the past month+ and on one hand i can't believe a fic about blockmen kissing is helping me figure this out but on the other hand im thinking of course it was your writing that helped me realize what is happening in my little feelings hole

anyway, just wanted to say thank you for how real and beautiful your writing is

sincerely, an aro/ace person who's feeling a little more okay about their crisis because you're an awesome human

HEY ANON,,,,, THIS IS SO SWEET WTF..... holy shit im literally speechless. I dont even remotely know what to say to such a genuine and heartfelt message, except that i am so, so happy ive managed to help you like this with my writing

Writing the arospec stuff was really interesting for me, personally, because thats an aspect of myself ive never really... set out much space to think about??? Ive known for a while that im probably demiromantic, considering how close i have to be with people before i can even begin to catch feelings, but ive never truly and consciously explored that within my writing before until now. And the fact that finally doing so has helped someone with a personal crisis really makes me so teary-eyed like hello...... oh my gods.

Thank you for taking the time to tell me this, and im so glad ive managed to help out despite being a virtual stranger. That novelty is never gonna wear off for me. I hope you're having a good day, anon❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ take care of yourself!! :]

#shouting speaks #asks #compliments #LITERALLY ABT TO CRY /POS THIS IS SO SWEET AND KIND AND IM JUST AUAUGHHH #i am very much a Helper™ in that i try very hard to support everyone in my life in any way i can #so like. man. knowing im Helping strangers somehow with my writing thats like. everything to me #cannot stress enough just HOW much it means to me #also like... man its weird isnt it #bc i DO feel romantic attraction but its just SO different from how everyone else says they experience it #for me its this conscious and informed choice #i love all the people in my life dearly and very fiercely but when i go into a romantic relationship #its always with an element of ''well im curious lets see what happens'' and choosing to try it out with someone i like #i find a certain comfort in the closeness and intimacy but i find EQUAL comfort in the closeness and intimacy of my platonic relationships #its real telling i think that i have a partner of going on.... 4 years now???? and two platonic relationships in the same household #that have been going on for even longer #smth smth the comfort of finding people you want to spend the rest of your life with regardless of romantic or platonic feelings #smth smth found family. im incredibly lucky to have made this one #anyway. wjfnejfnjd explodes #txt

[yume-fanfare]

also i didnt get any aira 5*s But i did get others + finally the tori 4* so i think i was lucky overall 💪

#2 copies of cards i already had then shu fs And kanata hot girl summer i love kanata hot girl summer #v happy #did 50 pulls here and there i think #but i did want an aira card 😔 maybe ill get his feather touch one when possible #let's see how lucky i am tomorrow #mar's midnight rambles

[tytrack]

feeling lonely but i made myself a very delicious iced salted caramel blueberry coffee so it’s not all so bad

#i just.....wish i could be in the company of people who love me i'm feeling very 😕 #i know i have people who love me and i feel so lucky but no one around me it seems #anyways i spent the day alone again today and the people who were lovely to me were random strangers #the cashier the security guard the food truck guy...my fav barista who knows my name and is always so happy to see me...i love her too #when she said that it's been awhile since she last saw me i almost teared up bc she remembered that! she remembers me #you know when you gain permanence in a stranger's mind it feels so profound it reaffirms your existence from the periphery #anyways i feel very fragile (i am very fragile) #and i'm feeling very stressed and lost bc of school too this next month is going to be probably my toughest month to date #let's see how we fare

[milf-harrington]

i will never be mad at or blame my sister for the situation she has been forced into, but i will forever be frustrated with our family for the responsibility thats been shoved onto me

"he'll have a village" my ass, he's got two mentally ill siblings and a FIFO worker who are all in their 20's

#its such bullshit and its so fucking hard listening to everyone go one about how much they love him #and how lucky he is to have a big family #where the fuck are they then!!!! why is it my job!!! #and i am NOT complaining about helping my sister or looking after my nephew #if youve been here long enough you 1. have probably heard this rant before and 2. know how much i love them #but fuck #my sister's looking at getting a fulltime job which sucks for both of us #im going to have to handle more responsibility and she's barely going to see her fucking son #like fuck you (our family) #ive been helping my sister since i fucking graduated so ive never been able to get a job #i dont even know if im going to be able to leave for my birthday like i planned because im just going to be stressed and guilty #about leaving my sister to handle everything alone for a week #(<- she would yell at me for that thought but i cant help it) #and my fucking cousin has the fucking guts to tell me it 'breaks her heart' that my nephew is shy around her #that he doesnt recognise or know her; but she's following her happiness in the city #which yeah!! good for her!! but dont fucking complain to me about not knowing my nephew #when you wont even bother to call him on his birthday #dont praise me for how much i help my sister like it was ever an option for me #'your sister is so lucky to have tou' yeah cause she doesnt have anyone fucking else #shes not even comfortable letting our mum have him without me there bc mum just fucking sucks #i dont care if im not being fair i just had to hold back from fucking bawling when i got hit with how unfair it is #4 years ago i thought id be in university studying art and saving up to go to italy #and now im 20 and im practically about to become a fulltime parent #and if IM tired i cant even imagine what my sisters going through #yknow shes always wanted to be a stay-at-home mum? #she only got the first 6 months #im just filled with dread and frustration and a bitter sort of sadness #but at least my nephew is a really cool dude to hang out with #and hey i might get better at cooking ajdjs #vent

[freebooter4ever]

This is 1000% random but came to mind regarding the duck movie. I sometimies watch movies without sound if I think they might ~suck~ like that... so just a tip if you want to see it but not sort of experience it :D hahahha

heh, well. ive already seen it fully so the damage has been done. i bought it even, thinking i would want to rewatch it, but i really REALLY dont think i will. ever. i have watched a LOT of bad movies for my stupid infatuations over the years so honestly im used to it.

#Im not gonna pretend like it doesnt hurt a little seeing the kind of movie joe is ok with attaching his name to #I was vaguely aware he was conservative but i will admit i didnt really have it shoved in my face until this #It reminds me of one of my closest friends here who just...we meshed in a that natural immediate connection way #And one day we were sitting in the getty villa just chatting and i was talking about the amazing documentary the Janes on h * b *o #And he just casually threw out there that he was pro life and anti abortion and he kind of wished he could force a woman #To carry his child against her wishes #He insinuated that when he was younger he got someone pregnant on accident and she refused to have the baby and got an abortion #And he felt it was a violation of his rights not to be able to force her to have a baby #And let me tell you i was like a slap in the face #Like that is...it is so discounting a womans right to her own body #It was chilling to hear a guy who i vibed with so well talk about a woman as if she's just a body and nothing else #I personally have been lucky or ugly enough that its never been an issue i have no idea how i feel about it #I mean my grandma WAS catholic and that seeps down no matter how lapsed i am #So i dont think i would have an abortion? But like i said i really genuinely like kids and in an ideal world would want that #But god im in my thirties now and still not financially stable enough to support a child i have no idea what i would have done #Had i gotten pregnant on accident #I spent most of my twenties recovering from an abusive relationship and not letting men touch me so it was never a question #Im just saying its a womans body its her life pregnancy is simple for some but for others its a life altering experience #It should be her right to choose :( and i wish men respected women enough considered them human enough to recognize that #If the shoe were on the other foot what man would let a woman decide that he must be pregant for 9 months #ALSO for fucks sake women shouldnt have to be practically celibate like i was just to prevent any accident from happening #Also also it is so fucked up that the same people who are pro life are also the bob types - skeptical of adoption #Like this is how you get unwanted kids in the world and take it from me that kids childhood is really really weird #Like knowing from a young age that you are what ruined your mothers life????? Fucking weird man i dont think i will ever process it #Especially being a woman now and recognizing that yeah i kinda did ruin my mothers life but it was neither of our fault #It was the pressure of society and people Trying To Do What They Are Supposed To #Meanwhile my dad was the I Could Never Love Other Peoples Kids and I Hate All Children That Arent My Own type #So yeah i guess i have a lot of negative feelings about this movie after all #Anyway it might have completely killed the joe infatuation LOL probably for the best #Dont even get me started on the blink or you miss it homophobia with bonus weird almost racism in the therapy scenes

[todayisafridaynight]

YEAH NO TONBI GOT HANDS.......... my timing on suggesting it may be Questionable but I AM very glad it holds up as a movie :] hopefully the interview and We Make Antiques are fun diversions! But also take it easy <3 can confirm Nakai is Pretty Moe in both though <3 And I WILL harass you about Masato's VA next week...

TBF YOU SUGGESTED IT A WEEK OR SO AGO twas on me for taking a while to get to it... nevertheless i did really enjoy it thank you..... AND YAYA IM SO STOKED TO WATCH THE FULL INTERVIEW AND WMA2 THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆!!!!!

esp cant wait to hear about masato's VA in the future.. 👁️👁️

#snap chats #LISTEN i think we all just have to accept at this point any time there's a story about a doting father or fts a doting father #i will cry like its unavoidable. so whether my life's falling apart that week or everything's fine #There Will Be No Difference In How Much I Cry ☠️☠️ im just built terribly what can i say it makes for GREAT inspo tho #tonbi WAS real cute tho and i did enjoy it a lot Because yasu did remind me of my dad a lot #very lucky to say my dad's never slapped me or thrown water in my face tho so LMAO BUT FOR THE MOST PART Yeah... #in a way it weirdly felt like watching an AU of my life. if i may sound insane. listen i already said the kid's name had me twisted LISTEN #fr tho cause ive always wondered what my life wouldve been like if i was able to be raised by my dad instead #im gonna make myself start crying if i get too deep into it LMAO NEEDLESS TO SAY i really enjoyed the movie :) #EVIL that they really did let us see akira get married and now yasu gotta give a speech and If He IS Anything Like My Dad #i know damn well he was winging it and didn't prep a script and I Will Start Crying if i think back to my sis's wedding #STILL MAD THAT THE ONE TIME I HAD TO PISS WAS RIGHT BEFORE HIS SPEECH BUT WHATEVER MOVING ON #said i wasnt gonna talk bout the movie/my dad anymore lest i make myself UPSET yet here i am... always saying more when i shouldnt ☠️ #but yeah... i have ONE (1) more comm this week Lest Someone Wants To Snipe A Spot IDK #SO im gon do that :] #and im kinda tired rn... but the uncertainty of how much time i have nowadays urges me to work on it a bit #i dont THINK it should take super long but it IS a full-rendered piece so.... it will take time needless to say #n e way not to sound insane but nakai is An Endearing Chap. is the most sane way i can put it #i mentioned it durin a stream but somethin bout him just naturally exudes cute... idk... im delirious probably ANYWAY BYE FR NOW #CANNOT WAIT for next week to be harassed 🥰🥰

[madigoround]

I’m screaming I bought the ticket for the Raleigh show I’ll be going to see my favorite band for the first time in two days 😱😍

#if anyone is reading this and hasn’t read the others that means the current plan is to leave work on Friday and quickly drive from Rva to #Raleigh North Carolina on Friday night have the time of my absolute life and probably cry because I already cried after buying the ticket #because it’s just so real now and I never thought I’d get to see them #and I listened to their music as a coping mechanism when I was fighting to survive and now I get to joyfully listen to it and enjoy my #freedom and then drive back to Virginia after the concert because I have plans Saturday and then in literally one month I have the Florida #show that I bought a ticket for almost three years ago and didn’t realize was finally happening until Sunday night so I’m driving 16 hours #to see the sunrise concert and then driving back and sometime in those days I have to meet up with the movers to move my furniture and stuff #to storage so it’s going to be a wild month but oh my god how lucky am I #truly the teenage version of me is crying in the club #do you think if I tag my chemical romance someone going to either of the shows I’m going to would want to meet up since I won’t have a #friend at either let’s see #my chemical romance

[kanizsacollage]

.

#it’s all math. #every thing- trying so hard to balance back to zero #sometimes I feel like I can see how it all works #how it all fits #but then I avoid it all #I don’t want to lose my stability #I made a promise in Edinburgh that I would not be the first to dip. ever. always trying to hold on for one last taste #now I don’t know what that looks like #it doesn’t have to be like *that* #but it has to be something #I learned in my feelings homework that one of my values/priorities is ‘obtain recognition and status’ #which can fall under ‘become powerful and able to influence other’ #that brings me so much shame: the arrogance; the audacity; the dark bad thing that hurts people #and so- I cut myself off #I deny all the people who love me- it’s overwhelming #cause it overwhelms but how lucky am I that people need me with them #I need to be a root- that which supports so much and is the core of it all- but doesn’t have to be above grown #‘you can grow up there- I’ll help from down here #but you can’t let yourself get too buried- too cut off from the light #Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way-ass ramblings #gotta act opposite to shame somewhere- why no tumblr dot com