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kimvvantae · 4 years

Text

puzzle; 6 (m)

➜ you and jungkook are best friends of a lifetime, even though your personalities are like unmatching pieces of a puzzle. the line between friendship and something more has never been crossed between you two - but that changes after a break up and a drunken night, when you not-so-accidentally cross this line to something much more. what happens when after this accident your non-matching puzzle pieces seem to match in a way you’ve never imagined?

pairing: jungkook x (f) reader

genre: smut, angst, comedy; friends with benefits au; college au

warnings: lots of swearing, unprotected sex (use condoms y’all kids)

rating: 18+

word count: 13k wooohoooooo

A/N: i listened to the same 4 songs over and over again while writing and i think it kind of sets the mood for this chapter so hm if you guys like listening to music while reading here goes a small playlist:

Jungkook - If you (read the lyrics pls)

Whitesnake - Is This Love

BTS - Jamais Vu

Sam Smith - Lay Me Down

enjoy!

➜ Chapters: check up masterlist in bio!

« playlist »

“You’re acting weird.”

You finally look up when you hear this, just to see Hoseok frowning at you.

“I’m not.” You’re quick to say, shrugging.

“You’re really acting weird. Is everything okay?” Hoseok insists, crossing his arms.

Hoseok is not what bothers you the most, though, but another pair of eyes watching you like a hawk.

Jimin knows why you’re acting weird. Since that day at Joy’s house, he has been staring at you like this constantly - half judging, half worried.

It’s very annoying, to be honest.

“I’m just… a little bit stressed.” You admit, shrugging again. Fortunately, Hoseok isn’t as observant as Jimin, so he seems convinced.

“So, what did you guys want?” You ask, changing the topic. They came after you in the cafeteria while you have lunch after all.

“Ah! I almost forgot,” Hoseok starts. “You quit your job at the coffee shop, right?”

“Yes. It was way too stressful and my boss was a bitch.” You huff.

“So you’ll be free this weekend?” He asks. You nod, but if he’s about to invite you to a party or something, you’re ready to say no. “The thing is, you know that me and Jimin have this job as waiters, right? There’s a wedding this weekend and they’re needing staff. So, if you’re interested, you can come with us on Saturday night. The payment is decent and it’s just easy stuff to do.”

Your mood lightens up at this. “Yeah, sure! I’ll go. I really need money right now.”

Hoseok smiles and claps his hands together. “Alright! I’ll send you all the information later. They’ll give you a uniform, so don’t worry about clothes. I have to go now. Bye!”

He leaves.

Jimin stays.

You just keep eating quietly, Jimin’s heavy gaze on you, until you finally get annoyed.

“Jimin, what do you want?” You cross your arms and glare back.

Jimin slowly quirks one eyebrow. “Won’t you ask me if Jungkook’s going?”

“Why would I ask if he’s going or not?”

“Because you guys aren’t talking anymore.”

“Thank you so much for reminding me of this, Jimin."

He realised that he went a little too far just by seeing your clenched jaw and the anger in your eyes. Jimin sighs and shrugs. "Anyways, yes, Jungkook is going. But not to work as a waiter, he’ll take pictures instead.”

“So what?"

Jimin swipes his hand over his face and shakes his head as if he can’t believe what he’s seeing. "I think you’re so stupid. Both of you. My fucking God.”

“You know what, Jimin? That’s none of your business.” You finally get up and take the tray rather roughly, walking away without looking back.

Maybe you were a little too rude with Jimin, but he’s being unbearable these days.

It’s been one month since that day at Joy’s house - one month since you and Jungkook have been avoiding each other like the plague.

And maybe you were a little too rude with him because deep down, you know he’s right.

As usual.

tae: wyd?? 👀👀

you: working

tae: ??? didn’t u quit ur job

you: yea

you: it’s one night thing

you: i need the 💸💸

tae: oh

tae: ok

tae: i’ll ask later then

you: wAIT

you: ask what??????

tae: later

tae: u should work first~

you: but im curious

you: i can’t work if im curious >:(

tae: 🙊

you: tae????

you: taeeeeeeee

you: TAEHYUNG

He doesn’t reply anymore.

You groan, shoving your phone on your back pocket again, and leave the restroom. The guests hadn’t arrived yet since the wedding ceremony is still ongoing, but the kitchen is already a mess: people yelling orders, the delicious scent of good food in the air, cooks cooking (duh) and waiters getting ready. The boss has already given you the last instructions, but it’s not as if working in an event like this is a difficult task: serve the guests, smile, be polite, walk around the hall, try not to break the crystal glasses that cost more than what you can pay.

The hotel is pretty fancy, actually. You were expecting a smaller wedding. Not that this is a problem, of course. The only problem here are the heels that all women are forced to use; it’s not too high, but walking around endlessly the whole night in these will be painful for sure. The rest of the uniform is that standard - black pants, white button shirt, black vest and bow tie, hair tied in a perfect high bun, simple makeup.

You walk to the hall to make the last adjustments in the decoration. Pretty much everything is in place, so there isn’t much to do. The tables are organized, the floor is pristinely clean, the white flower bouquets are in place. A DJ will be in charge of music tonight.

You stand at the back of the hall, almost hidden, just to check your phone once more; no new texts. Now, you can’t stop thinking about what Taehyung wants to ask. He knows you’d get all curious. You and Taehyung have grown closer these days: late phone calls, endless texts, random memes at random times. You hadn’t gone on a proper date yet, though - and you don’t think you want to.

Taehyung is a nice guy and a good friend, but you don’t want to take things to the next level - even though this seems to be Taehyung’s intention since the beginning. He has been insisting in you for quite a long time now meanwhile all you do is keep a certain distance. You didn’t really give him any real hopes yet and you’re afraid that Taehyung might be reading your actions in the wrong way. Truth be told, it’ll be so shitty of you to keep his hopes high when you won’t go anywhere with this.

Your feelings are all messed up.

Because you shouldn’t even be feeling anything in the first place.

Ironically, you’ve never been friends with benefits with anyone before. You did have some fuck buddies in the past, though - but you were never friends with any of them. You never got involved with any of your actual friends. Sure, there was that night when drunk-you and drunk-Jimin made out at a party (you don’t talk about it), but at that time, you had just joined college and neither you nor Jungkook were close to Jimin yet, so it doesn’t really count. Also, you and Jimin never had sex - you just kissed, nothing more.

But of course dumb you had to be friends with benefits with your best fucking friend. Of course you had to destroy your friendship like that. Everyone knows that sex is a friendship destroyer. Everyone!

One month without Jungkook felt like being in the desert without rain. You have good friends, but none of them are that special person that’s somehow able to read you mind and understand you even if you don’t say anything. None of them know the type of meme you’d laugh at, none of them sent you random snaps at random times of the day. Worst of all - you didn’t watch Endgame together, when you’ve been watching every Marvel film together ever since you both started obsessing over heroes years ago. Every. Single. Marvel. Film.

You didn’t get to see Jungkook crying during the last scenes of Endgame. Jimin didn’t say if he cried or not, but you know he cried.

That’s devastating.

Truth be told, you don’t even miss sex. Sure, you and Jungkook are the perfect match in bed, and you caught yourself masturbating at night wishing it were Jungkook’s fingers inside of you instead (touching yourself has never been so depressing), but what you actually miss to the point it hurts your chest are the small, familiar things. The comfortable silence. The funny banter. Going to Burger King together late at night after a party or when none of you want to cook. Showing each other funny videos or discussing about the latest chapter of the manga you’re both reading. Jungkook ignoring your texts for hours because he’s too focused on playing Overwatch. You even miss the way he never lets you eat the last slice of pizza, goddammit.

You simply miss him.

What leads you to another thought - something that has been growing stronger in your mind.

After days of self denial, you finally admitted that you were jealous of Jungkook and Joy.

There’s no other explanation for the way you acted that day at her house. You were mad that she was touching him and getting too close. That’s weird. You’ve never really been the jealous type. You never minded when people tried to flirt with Jungkook.

You’re not jealous of friends.

Even so, you had a jealousy attack and didn’t rest until Jungkook’s attention was yours again.

Being totally honest with yourself, you’ve been jealous of Joy ever since you found out she was interested in him.

…what the fuck?

Something inside of you have changed, and only now you’re brave enough to admit. Somewhere along the road, you stopped seeing Jungkook as just a friend. He’s currently in that blurry and confusing level - not only a friend, but at the same time, not more than a friend. You don’t know what the fuck he is anymore.

More importantly… do you want to be more than friends?

If you and Jungkook make up, will you be able to go back to what it was - just friends?

Or are you just being possessive? Did you start seeing him in a different way just because you realized you’re about to lose him?

You don’t know the answer to none of those questions. What you know at the moment is that being away from him fucking hurts. You have the same friends, go to the same places, study at the same university, but barely see each other anymore. What’s that thing people say? You just start valuing things after you lose them.

Jimin asked you not to play with Jungkook’s feelings. What he doesn’t know, though, is that you’re so confused about yours that you don’t have time to play with his feelings.

When you realize the guests are about to come, you force your brain to focus on your current task. You stand back with the rest of the waiters as, slowly, the elegant guests get into the hall, sitting at their respective tables, and soon the place is filled with conversation, laughter and music.

After everyone took their places, the main couple finally come.

The lights change. The DJ plays a special song. Guests stand up and applaud when they enter the hall, smiling, and walk to the center to have their first dance as a married couple.

You could have noticed how the bride’s dress was beautiful. You could have noticed how her front teeth was dirty with lipstick and how the groom tried to discreetly tell her about this. You could have even noticed how one of the kids was starting to have a tantrum and his mother half-screamed, half-whispered, if you don’t be quiet you’ll be grounded for one month!

But you don’t notice any of that, because the photographer enters the hall right after the couple does.

Your heart flutters in a funny way.

Jungkook is wearing a suit (you don’t even remember the last time you saw him in a suit); black and simple, but it fits him so well. He isn’t much different from all the other man, except for his long hair - his black hair is so long he can probably tie it now - and his ear piercings. He holds his camera to eye level, capturing every moment he can from the couple’s first dance, a backpack with other tools hanging from his shoulder.

Everyone else is focusing on the couple - but you can’t look at anything else but him.

He looks so handsome and focused and hot and-

Hey, you’re here to work!, you remind yourself angrily, shaking your head and walking back to the kitchen.

Drink after drink, tray after tray - you and the other waiters and waitresses walk around the hall to serve the guests. It’s not a difficult work, but still tiring nevertheless. It’s also hard to balance yourself and the trays with these high heels. Soon, you’re immersed in the work and momentarily forget about everything else, although (unconsciously) you try to avoid being seen by a specific someone.

Time passes by and the party goes on. Parents make heartfelt speeches, everyone cries. The DJ plays popular songs and soon the dancefloor is full. Alcohol already starts to get into their heads. Men are either speaking and laughing too loud or crying, hugging the groom. Women already forgot their high heels and their elegance, twerking shamelessly and screaming. Kids do the usual - run, yell, fall and cry - and they almost throw you on the ground twice. Someone spills champagne on the floor; you rush to clean it before someone ends up slipping. There’s the eventual noise of glass breaking. A certain dude has asked for your help far too much and you start to avoid him, noticing that he’s staring at your ass. Another guest pukes and is taken to the infirmary. As usual, you hear old women complaining about the food, how the decoration is ugly, how one waiter was rude, how the DJ doesn’t play the songs they want-

“The photographer is so hot! What’s his name?!” You hear someone giggling.

You gulp.

Jungkook is just doing his job, but that boy can’t go unnoticed, not even when he tries. You don’t know if he saw you yet, and honestly, you hope he didn’t.

Just do your job. Just do your job.

The night goes on. Your left foot hurts and you need to pee, but gladly most of the guests have already left - the groom and bride left first and the party went on without them -, the hall is almost empty, which means it’s almost ending. Now, you busy yourself with cleaning the hall.

“Man, I’m dead,” Hoseok groans, stretching his back. You nod, putting some empty glasses on a tray to take them back to the kitchen.

“Now imagine bearing it all in heels,” you say, not being able to keep your nice posture anymore. Not that there are many guests anyway - most are too drunk or sleeping on the tables. The DJ is still diligently playing, though.

“The night was productive after all,” Jimin chirps happily, approaching you two with a smug grin on his lips. You see he’s holding a small paper between his fingers… someone’s phone number.

“Son of a bitch,” you say under your breath. Jimin just shrugs and smirks. Much obviously, you apologized for your rudeness before you came. The fact that he forgave you so easily made everything worse, honestly. Jimin is a nice guy with his friends (way too nice for his own good sometimes) and it just shows how he doesn’t deserve to be treated in a rude way.

“I’m just taking the chances life gives me!” He chirps again, making you roll your eyes.

“Anyways, what’s wrong with Jungkook?” Hoseok wonders, crossing his arms and frowning. “He didn’t come over the entire night. Is he avoiding us?”

You gulp.

Instantly, your eyes travel to where he stands in the nearly-empty dance floor. He smiles politely to some women that stand around him. Everyone’s obviously too drunk and they’re probably talking nonsense.

He’s avoiding me, you realize sadly.

“He’s working, Hoseok. His job won’t end if the guests keep asking for pictures.” Jimin is quick to say, what indeed makes sense, but Jimin also knows very well why he has been keeping his distance. Hoseok is the only one that doesn’t notice the strange tension in the air.

When you notice you’ve been staring for an embarrassing long time, you immediately shift your gaze to the dirty plates in front of you, organizing them in a pile to take them to the kitchen. You came here to work. That’s it. Focus-

An excited scream tears the air.

“I loooove this song!” One of the girls on the dance floor scream, the one that has been clinging on Jungkook ever since the crowd started to dissipate. Much obviously tipsy, her eyes were glued on him the entire night (not that you’ve been noticing the people checking him out. Of course not). “Jungkookie, dance with me!”

You almost gasp.

Jungkookie?!

That’s when you finally notice the face Jungkook is making - and you try your best not to laugh.

He has that look that means oh my fucking God someone please take me out of this situation.

The two boys by your side don’t try to hide the laughter as well as you, watching the desperate Jungkook try to turn her offer down - an awkward smile, eyes shifting from her, a muttered apology (I still have some work to do…) but the thirsty girl is surprisingly insistent (you can stop for a little bit, come on!).

“I feel sorry for him,” Hoseok almost chokes as he tries to stop his giggles. You kind of feel sorry, too. He can’t be rude to a customer, otherwise he’d be punched by her relatives - not that Jungkook would be rude anyway. He steps back, scratches the back of his neck. The girl is almost climbing him. He looks around desperately, trying to find a way to escape-

“Why don’t you help him, Y/N?” Jimin says sweetly.

You side eye the sugar-coated snake you call friend. “Jimin.” Is all you say in a warning manner.

Someone that doesn’t understand the situation wouldn’t think anything weird, because you’re actually used to save Jungkook from crazy girls. The thing is, sometimes he’s too nice to turn girls down - and yes, girls do chase him. When he’s not interested in them, you’d usually understand the situation and run on his rescue, most times pretending to be his girlfriend so the girls would stop bothering him. It’s something funny and you’d always laugh your asses off right after.

Not now.

You definitely don’t want to laugh now.

Jimin is being far from innocent. He just wants to push you two into each other. He may have good intentions, but he’s not considering the fact that you don’t feel ready to face Jungkook - not when your feelings are so messed up. This ain’t happening.

“Yeah, Y/N. Jungkook looks pretty desperate,” Hoseok remarks, again, oblivious to the tension lingering in the air.

“Jungkook can handle himself very well. He doesn’t need my help.” Even though Jimin feels your menacing glare and sees your jaw clench, this boy is very brave and insists:

“Come on, Y/N! It won’t hurt.” He says innocently.

Yes, it will hurt. It already hurts, dumbass.

“Did you guys forget that we’re here to work? I don’t want to be reprimanded.”

“The hall is near empty. There’s literally nothing to do anymore.” Hoseok doesn’t understand why you’re glaring at him now.

You’re trying to control your nerves, but it’s getting hard not to feel your stomach jump in a weird way and your fingertips tremble. Just the idea of approaching him makes you weak, and not in a good way. Why these people can’t just leave you alone?!

“Do you think that avoiding him forever will work?” Jimin hisses on your ear, low enough so only you can listen, finally showing how pissed he really is.

What he says gets you.

Avoiding each other isn’t working, you know this very well. You remember the way you used to deal with things in the past - talking. Sure, you won’t be able to really talk right now, but at least you’ll have a chance to approach him.

You don’t want to. You really don’t. But at the same time, you want to. You miss Jungkook.

Besides, he can’t run away from you in this situation.

You take a deep breath and gulp, trying to ease the tension. Come on. I know Jungkook. He’s the same bastard I’ve known my whole life. Stop being a pussy. I’m not a pussy!

“Just to make clear,” you whisper back to Jimin. “I fucking hate you.”

“You love me.” You wish you could rip that triumphant smirk off his face.

You walk over to the dance floor.

The few couples dance slowly and intimately. Because of course it had to be a slow dance. Of course it had to be a romantic song. Haha. Of course. The Universe must be playing some trick on you.

Jungkook managed to run away from the girl, trying to hide in the corner of the hall, and she’s searching for him like a hawk. You wonder if she’s this drunk or if she’s just stupid. A guy literally running away from you isn’t already a message enough?

You walk quickly to where he stands, and the moment Jungkook turns around and lays his eyes on you, shock covers his features.

“Y/N-?”

“Quick, dance with me,” you say hurriedly, placing his hands on your waist. “She’s coming.”

Instead of questioning, Jungkook immediately starts to play along as you place your own hands on his shoulders. You discreetly watch when the girl finally finds you.

She stops on her tracks.

“She saw us?” He asks without looking back.

“Yes.”

“And?”

You see fire in her eyes.

“If she had a gun, she’d probably shoot me.” The girl looks outraged that you stole her chance to grind on him. “Oh, she’s turning away.”

Jungkook sighs in relief. “Thanks God. She’s been bothering me all night!” You can’t help but giggle.

For a millisecond, it feels like nothing has changed.

But then you look at each other for the first time.

It might be dramatic, but you almost feel that the temperature drops around you.

Oh shit.

You avoid each other’s gazes at the same time. It feels so tremendously awkward to be in front of him again - especially when you’re slow dancing in the dim light of the hall, almost hidden. It feels uncomfortably intimate. Especially because you’re both keeping a distance that normal couples wouldn’t. You probably look like a weird couple at a prom party that were forced to dance together.

It feels foreign.

The way you touch each other doesn’t feel right. You have touched each other in the most intimate and obscene ways, yet the simple touch of his hands on your waist doesn’t feel right. Despite this, you feel your blood boiling with a strange type of excitement; you missed him so damn much. Even in this uncomfortable situation, you can’t help but feel a little bit happy. You didn’t know you’ve been craving for his touch so much up until now.

What’s weird is that you don’t even feel like this in a sexual way. You’re not aroused. Considering how your relationship became strictly sexual these past months, your lack of arousal to be around him is weird.

The butterflies in your stomach and the way your hands are shaking a little bit is also weird.

For some moments, you just sway from side to side in an overwhelming silence. You have no choice but to listen intently to the song being played. As if you already don’t feel fucked up enough, you’re forced to listen to a love song - an 80s love song on top of that. Of course it has to be Is This Love by Whitesnake. Of course. Haha.

“Uhm… thanks.” Jungkook finally breaks the silence. His voice lacks confidence. He probably never talked to you like this.

“Just helping out a friend,” you say and instant regret smashes you. You don’t know if he’s still your friend.

Jungkook looks scarily annoyed for a second. “A friend. Sure.”

Is it inappropriate to notice how he looks handsome when he clenches his jaw?

Honestly, has Jungkook always been this handsome?

Sure, he has always been like this. Maybe not seeing him in a long time made you feel this way. His hair has grown a lot. He looks extra fine in this suit. Every man looks better in a suit, but Jungkook looks like a deity.

The butterflies in your stomach are going crazy.

You did miss him a lot.

The silence makes you pay attention to the song again.

Wasted days and sleepless nights

But I can’t wait to see you again…

Hah, I know how it feels, you think - what makes you widen your eyes, shocked with your own thoughts. No. You won’t suddenly relate to a cliche 80s love song.

Right?

“H-How’s school going?” You stutter. Are you trying to do small talk? For real?

“It’s doing fine,” he simply says. Oh fuck. Not good. He sounds so uninterested in your weak attempt at engaging a conversation it hurts. You came here to try and talk about what really matters, but you don’t feel ready to do it yet. Can’t he understand it?!

It looks like your presence bothers him, honestly.

That’s new.

Wow. Your heart suddenly feels clenched.

Awkward.

Why am I feeling this way?

A heavy silence weighs on you again. This isn’t going as planned - not that you planned anything in the first place. You’re going through a lot of weird sensations now.

Why is that?

You look at Jungkook timidly (timid and Jungkook are two words that used to not make any sense together in the past), but he doesn’t look back. You avoid his gaze again.

Being hit by a truck would hurt less.

What’s happening?

Why are you so damn confused?

When the song hits its chorus, you start to think the Universe is definitely playing with you. The deep voice of the singer floats in the air:

Is this love

That I’m feeling?

Is this the love

That I’ve been searching for?

Fuck you, Whitesnake.

For real.

Fuck. You.

“Did Taehyung ask you?”

This brings you back to reality in an instant.

“What?” You look at him, confused. Why is he talking about Taehyung of all people out of nowhere?

You’ve always been very good at reading Jungkook, but right now, he’s unreadable.

“So he didn’t.” He says blatantly, devoid of any emotion. “I thought he would have already.”

“What are you talking about?”

“He talked to me about a double date.” Jungkook replies, looking back at you for the first time - again, a blank face. “You and him, me and Joy.”

Your blood honestly feels like frost.

It’s like you lost the ability to move or talk for a moment. You blink and gulp, trying to keep composed.

“What? Why?”

“Because he said it’d be fun. And less awkward, since I’m not very close to Joy yet and you’re not very close to him.”

Again, you don’t say anything for long seconds.

“But we’d just be cockblocking each other during the whole date,” you say.

“I know. I think the idea of a double date sounds weird, too. It’s not as if we don’t know them.”

You remember what Taehyung texted you earlier today; he said he’d ask something later. Is he going to ask you out?

He thinks that, since you and Jungkook are best friends, you could ease the tension and even help each other out.

This is so fucked up.

The immediate answer that comes to your mind is no. You don’t want to go on a date with Taehyung when you’re not interested in him. It’d be cruel; you don’t want to keep his hopes high.

But as you’re about to say it, you stop.

What if Jungkook wants to go?

All this time, you’ve only been considering your feelings. Your confusion, your wishes - it’s always about you. You don’t know if you want to be just Jungkook’s friend, but you don’t know if he wants to be more than a friend - or if he wants to be your friend at all. The fuck buddies thing started because you asked. Not even once did you think about him.

Is this what Jimin meant when he asked you to not play with Jungkook’s feelings?

How selfish you’ve been acting all this time?

What if he’s been developing feelings for Joy and now decided to try something? He’s probably feeling hurt because you’ve not been acting like a good friend. You’re always putting yourself first.

That’s why you hear yourself asking:

“Do you want to go?”

It’s scary how every tiny little piece of you wishes he’ll say no.

But Jungkook tilts his head and says:

“Yes. I know it sounds weird, but we can part ways as soon as we get there.”

And this is the moment you feel as cold as you’ve never felt in your life.

It’s as if your ears got obstructed for a moment, because you can’t hear anything but your heartbeat. You can’t even see properly for a second. Yet, you ignore all that, gulp and nod.

It’s time to be a good friend for once.

It’s time to put Jungkook’s wishes first - even though it crushes your heart.

“Okay.” You say quietly.

You’re coming to the conclusion that you’re a walking disaster.

You’ve never been so nervous before a date in your life - but this is not the usual type of nervousness, when people are excited to meet their crush and impress them etc etc. You’re nervous because you don’t want to go. You thought of coming up with a thousand excuses (from the classical “I’m sick :(” to “Seulgi’s sick I gotta take care of her :(” to “my cat’s sick :(” but then you remembered you don’t have a cat to “I’m being chased by the police and I gotta leave the country :(”), but in the end, you couldn’t bring yourself to lie.

Not when Taehyung sounded so painfully happy when you said you’d go.

That’s why you should have said no: Taehyung doesn’t deserve this. He’s a good person and he will certainly get hurt when you tell him you’re not interested. Who cares about Jungkook? That fucker can go on a date by himself, he’s not a kid anymore.

But…

There’s something very tiny and mean inside of you called jealousy that didn’t let you simply text an honest apology to Taehyung.

And now it’s too late, because he’s standing at your door.

Handsome as always, Taehyung wears casual clothes: it’s almost as if he didn’t put much thought on it, but he still looks drop dead gorgeous on his black baggy pants, white shirt and black beret (no other man in this planet can manage to not look stupid in a beret other than Taehyung). As usual, your brain malfunctions as it tries to process his beauty.

He has a small, beautiful smile on his lips.

Shit.

“You look beautiful,” he says, and he sounds like he means it. You did put some effort on your clothes, makeup and hair after all. Being complimented by him feels nice.

Shit.

“Thanks. You too, but that’s just your usual self,” you say thoughtlessly and instant regret slaps your face again. Yes, bitch. Flirt with him. Make things more difficult.

Taehyung looks shy for a moment. The sight is endearing.

S. H. I. T.

“You’re just being nice to me.” He tilts his head. “So, let’s go?"

It’s too late to go back now, so you have no choice but to take his arm and show your most plastic smile. "Yeah.”

You’re definitely a walking disaster.

You two arrive in the park first and, instead of just showing your tickets and getting in, you’re forced to wait for the bastard and his hot date.

An amusement park of all places.

Not that you hate amusement parks, it’s pretty much the opposite. It’s just that everything feels so wrong. Especially how Taehyung is making a lot of effort to keep the conversation alive while you wait. It’s not hard to talk to him, though, because he’s an interesting person, but seeing his efforts hurts.

What hurts more is the sight of Jungkook and Joy arriving with locked arms.

You hope Taehyung didn’t notice you holding your breath.

Joy looks hot as always, but you don’t even look at her (yes, it’s not nice to be mad at someone that didn’t do anything wrong), eyes glued on Jungkook instead. Just like Taehyung, it seems that he didn’t put much thought on his clothes, only their styles are completely different: Jungkook wears an oversized grey t-shirt, black pants and sneakers. It might seem simple, but he can manage to look good in anything. Joy surely didn’t mind his choice of clothes.

You lock gazes for one second and proceed to avoid it.

The four of you greet. It’s hard to act natural, but you try to; you don’t want the two others to notice the weird tension between you and the black-haired bastard. Joy looks happy, too.

…

Shit.

Soon, you get into the amusement park. As expected, it’s crowded with kids, families and couples. The weather feels nice this afternoon.

“It’s been a long time since I don’t come to an amusement park,” you confess.

“Really? Then this was a good choice. I was worried if it’d be too cheesy…” he also confesses sheepishly.

“It’s not!” You reassure him. Joy agrees with you. Jungkook keeps silent. “I just have some traumatizing memories about amusement parks.”

Taehyung quirks one eyebrow. “What?”

You sigh.

You and Jungkook end up saying in unison:

“5th grade.”

You look at each other and avoid your gazes again.

“What? What happened on 5th grade?” Joy asks excitedly.

“Our school came to an amusement park that year,” Jungkook explains.

“Why was it traumatizing?” Taehyung still seems confused.

“Because… well…” you hesitate to say.

“Because she was so short back then that they didn’t let her go on the rollercoasters. And she cried the whole trip,” Jungkook suddenly says.

You glare at him.

He has a playful smirk on his lips.

“Oh, so what about you?” You can’t help but smile, too.

“What happened to him?” Joy asks.

“He laughed at me because I couldn’t ride, but he puked his lunch after he went on the coaster and spent half of the trip in the infirmary,” you reveal.

“You’re still bitter that you stayed with me in the infirmary?” He inquires.

“Of course I am! Also, you puked on my shoes!”

“I already apologized. Besides, I paid you banana milk for two entire weeks. Isn’t it enough?”

“It isn’t!”

“Are you saying that banana milk isn’t enough?!” He gasps. “You psycho.”

You both giggle.

Again, for one moment, it feels that everything is back to normal. You feel comfortable having these old memories, as if you never stopped being best friends, as if you have the intimacy to play like this again.

But it’s only for one moment.

You avoid gazes. It feels so out of place.

At least the sadness in Jungkook’s eyes shows that he feels the same about this all.

Before the tension between you two can become too strong, you change the topic and engage both Taehyung and Joy in the conversation - during that moment, you two forgot about them. As wrong as it is, Taehyung is your date for the night. He’s the one you should pay attention to.

So you try to completely ignore Jungkook’s existence for a while.

You only look at Taehyung and don’t even touch your phone. You answer his questions and ask things about him. It doesn’t feel like a punishment, though, because he is an interesting person and you genuinely enjoy his company.

But you can’t help but look at Jungkook from time to time.

You can’t help but notice his smiley-eyes as he looks at her. You can’t help but see their closure.

You can’t help but feel your heart clenching.

And then, you see yourself locking your arm with Taehyung’s.

“What’s that?” You say excitedly. “I wanna see it!”

You drag Taehyung away from the other couple until they disappear in the crowd. Only then you remember how to breathe again.

Considering all the odds, this going better than you expected.

You tried your best to completely erase Jungkook’s and Joy’s existence from your mind, and at some point it finally worked. Taehyung is a funny guy to be around. There’s something very particular and endearing about his personality that captivates you; he’s obviously trying to impress you, but he’s still being very honest. He has some type of innocence that makes you realize that this guy is seriously one of a kind. You can’t think of a single sign that he might be a bad person.

You’re genuinely enjoy this.

But not in the way Taehyung expects you to be enjoying it.

As wrong as it is, you unconsciously end up comparing him to Jungkook.

If Jungkook was your date, the first thing you’d both want to do is try all the rollercoasters and the wildest rides in this park. But Taehyung is scared of heights. You didn’t want to make the boy vomit his own stomach, so you ended up avoiding it - even though you really wanted to go on that orange coaster that looks high as fuck.

Taehyung didn’t really get your jokes. The fact that he still laughed politely is cute, but still - Jungkook and you have the same sense of humor. You two like the same stupid type of meme. It felt strange when you had to explain more than once a certain joke so Taehyung could understand.

Taehyung didn’t know your favorite ice cream flavor or your favorite soda. He doesn’t know the kind of movie you like, nor your favorite series, nor your favorite singers. You know you’re being stupid - the whole point of going on a date is to get to know each other, but every now and then you end up remembering how Jungkook knows every dumb detail about you…

What makes you realize that, as much as Taehyung is an amazing guy, you are too different from each other.

What also makes you realize that, maybe… you don’t really want to get to know anyone else.

And suddenly, an image starts to build in your mind - an image you try very hard to erase, but it’s already too strong to be forgotten.

Instead of Taehyung, you arm is locked with Jungkook’s. You’re both laughing and having fun, just like things used to be. Only now you’re not just friends.

It’s the first time in all these years that you see yourself dating Jungkook clearly. Painfully clearly.

The cotton candy you’re eating suddenly tastes like iron on your tongue. You feel your throat tightening. All of this became painful. The fact that you’re trying so hard to forget Jungkook for a few minutes, yet he’s everything you can think of. The fact that he’s in the same park as you having a date with another girl - said girl that is a friend, by the way, someone you encouraged to be with Jungkook, and now you’re hating her existence even though she did nothing wrong, all because of jealousy. There’s also the fact that Jungkook is much obviously avoiding you.

And the most painful fact of all-

“Are you okay, YN?” Taehyung asks, the smile vanishing from his lips the moment he sees your expression.

The fact that this incredible person likes you much more than you expected. It’s obvious now that you look at his eyes. He really likes you - a funny, smart and special guy, someone that didn’t check his phone not even once ever since this date started, someone that has been trying his hardest to make sure you’re having fun, a guy that is usually very confident, but at the moment looks very uneasy around you.

He’s the perfect guy. He wasn’t disrespectful, wasn’t trying to get into your pants, treated you very well. You went on dates that were far worse than this. There was nothing wrong with him. You’re also sure he’d be a loving and caring boyfriend.

But all you can think of is Jungkook.

And even though you knew this date wouldn’t work, you still accepted to come anyway. You kept Taehyung’s hopes high. Just because you were jealous.

You’re definitely the worst person on this planet.

But this has to end before Taehyung gets more hurt.

“I’m not feeling very well,” you hear yourself saying. Worry covers Taehyung’s features. “What’s the problem? Was it something you ate? Do you want to go to the infirmary?”

Damn. It hurts to see him like this.

“No. Can you… can you just take me home, please?” You ask sheepishly.

If Taehyung feels disappointed, he doesn’t let you see; he just nods instead. “Okay. Let’s go.”

And this is how you managed to destroy a perfectly fine night.

You still try not to think of Jungkook and Joy on your way back home; you don’t want to know if they’re still in the park or if they went somewhere else. The idea of what they must be doing makes your stomach twirl in a bad way. It feels like a weight installed itself on your shoulders. Everything seems too oppressive and suffocating. You can’t wait to be alone and peaceful to process all of these feelings. Fortunately, Seulgi isn’t home - she went to sleep at a friend’s house to finish a project.

For the first time, being with Taehyung feels awkward as you walk to the front door of your apartment. You can see he isn’t exactly glad. It makes everything worse.

You stop in front of the door and you turn around to face him. Everything you have to say must be said now.

“I’m so sorry, Taehyung.” You say in an embarrassed tone, scratching the back of your neck. “I ruined everything.”

“What? No!” He’s quick to reassure. God, his eyes are beautiful… “It’s not your fault. People feel ill, that’s normal.”

You gulp. Oh Gosh. He believed what you said. This is getting worse and worse… “I had a lot of fun today. Really.” You sigh and tilt your head tiredly. “Honestly, it was the most fun I had in a long time…”

“I had a lot of fun, too.” His smile is able to melt any frozen heart. “I noticed that you had a lot in mind, so I’m glad I was able to distract you at least a little.”

It gets you off guard.

He’s way more observant than you expected.

“You noticed…?” You gulp, even more embarrassed. He nods. “I’m so sorry…”

“It’s fine. Everyone has a bad day every now and then. I just have to admit that I’m kind of worried about you.”

You stare at each other in silence for a while.

“Are you?” Why suddenly all you can do is make stupid questions?

Taehyung tilts his head. “Yes. You’re always such a bright person. Seeing you being quiet these days makes me sad.” First of all: did people start to realize that there’s something wrong with you? Are you acting this weird?

Second of all: that was adorable. He’s so honest about his feelings.

“To be honest, Taehyung… I’m not really a bright person,” you end up confessing in a quiet, weak voice. You don’t know why you’re saying this. You were supposed to push him away, not pull him closer. “I think I’m just used to pretend I am.”

“You don’t have to,” your eyes widen when you feel his fingertips brushing on your cheek as he gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. “You don’t have to pretend you’re fine when you’re not. To suppress this type of feeling… it hurts. Believe me, I know.” For a moment, you feel your breath hitch. The skin where his fingers touched feels warm. He’s mesmerizing. His voice sounds like a sweet melody on your ears: deep, silky. “So, if you ever feel like opening up… I’m here, okay?” He widens his eyes for a second. “I-I mean- you can open up to Seulgi or Jungkook or Jimin, sure… anyone.”

This moment of shyness coming from him makes you giggle. “I don’t feel like opening up to anyone right now,” especially not to you, you think. “but thank you, Tae. It… it makes me really happy. I’m glad I went on this date with you.”

You shouldn’t have said that.

You shouldn’t have called him Tae.

Even though you’re saying the truth and there’s no second intentions hidden, Taehyung hears something else.

His hand is still resting on your cheek.

And he says nothing.

He just… stares right into your eyes.

You can’t move.

You clearly see when his face starts coming closer and closer to yours, slowly but surely. You see his heavy-lidded eyes, his clouded gaze, his parted lips. You feel the thick tension in the air around you - the electricity.

That’s when you should have pushed him away.

But you can’t.

Instead, you unconsciously close your eyes. You feel his lips ghosting over yours for a second - until his lips finally touch yours.

The kiss is suave - gentle and delicate. He doesn’t move his lips at first, merely pressing his against yours. Your body warms up in a way you haven’t felt in a long time; not because of arousal. It’s the pure excitement of being kissed.

Maybe that’s why you let him kiss you. You had forgotten how it feels like to be touched without any sexual intention. Kisses are too intimate, so you and Jungkook didn’t really kiss that often - and when you did kiss, it was always heated and obscene, tongues entangling wildly until both of you could barely breathe. It’s been a long time since someone kissed and held you like this: with gentleness and care. Taehyung isn’t treating you like a sex toy.

You melt.

Your lips part as he deepens the kiss; he is undemanding, careful and delicate. His lips taste like lip balm. No one is fighting for control, no one is desperate. It’s slow and synchronized. It’s sweet and innocent. Most importantly - it’s way different than you ever expected it to be. You never thought he’d kiss like this.

When Taehyung pulls away, the purest smile adorns his features.

“I’m sorry.” He says quietly, but he doesn’t sound sorry at all. “I should have asked permission.”

“It’s okay.” And it really is. You shouldn’t, but you liked it.

“I'll… I’ll get going.” He says, the smile never disappearing. His eyes are also smiling. He stands there awkwardly in an adorable manner. “Can I text you later?”

“Sure.” You nod. “Good night. And thank you again.”

Taehyung grins. “Good night.”

Before leaving, he presses his lips on yours quickly one last time.

You watch until he disappears inside the elevator, entering the apartment and standing there alone in the dark for a few seconds.

Then you unceremoniously slam your forehead against the wooden door.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” You hiss between gritted teeth. “What have you done?!”

You were supposed to push him away. You should have told him the truth - that you don’t have feelings for him, that you’re confused and almost certainly in love with another guy. Instead, you just stood there and let him kiss you. You not only kept his hopes high, you increased them.

How will you get yourself out of this situation now?!

You throw yourself on the couch, grab a cushion and scream into it. I’m the worst of the worst. I’m a walking catastrophe.

For a long time, you just lay there and torture yourself with bad thoughts. Taehyung is the nicest guy you’ve met in a really long time. If you gave him the opportunity months ago, you’re sure you’d be dating right now - and the idea isn’t even unpleasant. He’s hot and smart and funny and sweet. It’s even hard to believe that someone like him is interested in you.

But…

No. Don’t think about him.

You want to punch yourself and scream and eat tons of ice cream and cry - all at once. You’re the queen of taking bad decisions. You’re the heart crusher and friendship destroyer-

There’s someone knocking on the front door.

You sit up in a jump and frown. Is it Seulgi? Did she forget her keys?

You walk slowly around the living room, defeated as if you’ve just came home from war, your hair a mess and shoulders shrinking. You turn the doorknob and open it-

And gasp.

Because standing at your front door is the person you least expected to see.

Jungkook is casually leaning on the door frame as if his presence didn’t make you burst a lung. He looks down, eyes avoiding yours; although the hallway is considerably dark, you can see his expression well. You know him too well. You see sadness and guilt and fear in his eyes.

Your heart beats so fast that you’re afraid it’ll stop suddenly. Nervousness crawls over your skin and makes your stomach feel cold.

“J-Jungkook? What are you doing here?” You’re brave enough to stutter. You completely forgot that Jungkook used to come over so often that you gave him full permission to enter and leave the building whenever he wanted.

He doesn’t say anything.

Instead, he lifts his left hand and shows you what he’s carrying: a plastic bag full with a pack of…

Banana milk.

“I think we really need to talk.” He says quietly, his eyes meeting yours for the first time.

You inhale sharply.

He’s right. You need to talk.

The cold night breeze makes you tighten your coat around your body. Yours and Jungkook’s hairs sway softly with the wind. You can hear the sounds of the city from up here, in the empty terrace - cars, sirens, voices. A glowing map of endless streets and buildings extends itself in front of your eyes.

You’re both leaning on the railing side by side. You’re hyper aware of the distance between you - both physical and… spiritual. You’ve been standing here in silence for quite some time now, quietly drinking the banana milk he brought, and none of you were able to engage a conversation. The tension is heavy. It overwhelms your whole being. Nervousness makes your nerves tense. You can’t even look at him.

Dozens of questions float around your mind; what is he doing here? Why did he decide to come in the first place? What happened to his date? It’s still very early, he could have stayed with her much longer…

You also can’t help but feel helplessly excited that he is here. With you. Not with Joy. He took the initiative to meet you.

You can’t lose this opportunity.

“It’s kinda cold.” Is the first thing you say. It doesn’t even sound like you.

“Yeah.” He agrees, and he also doesn’t sound like him.

The awkwardness is almost solid right now. Things used to be so different… you can’t remember one moment in the past when such an uncomfortable feeling lingered between you.

“Hm…” you cough. “What, hm… what about you and Joy?”

Why the fuck are you asking this?, you yell at yourself.

Jungkook looks down and shakes his head. “Let’s not talk about Joy or Taehyung right now, okay?”

You shrug. “I’m just trying to start a conversation.”

“That’s not how you do it.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know how to do it anymore.”

Jungkook goes silent with this, the quick aggressiveness disappearing as soon as it came. He gulps and looks down at the banana milk between his fingers again.

More silence.

“Can I… can I ask you something?” Jungkook says after a long while. His voice is quiet, hesitant, almost being carried away with the wind.

“What?” You feel your body heating up in anticipation.

He finally looks up to you, and in the moment your eyes meet, you have this weird feeling that everything except him looks blurred.

“Why did you start dating Mike?” He asks. “I warned you about him. I mean, you used to listen to me in the past.”

Oh.

Certainly not the type of question you were expecting.

What a mood killer, Jungkook.

You avoid his gaze again, trying to hide your disappointment. “Why are you asking me this now?”

“I just really want to know.” He takes one more sip of the banana milk.

A sigh escapes through your lips and you stare at the shiny city ahead. You didn’t think you’d have to bring up memories of Mike. It’s been a long time, but it still hurts to remember him.

“I… I just…” you start, trying to organize your thoughts. “You know that Mike had like a… bad relationship with his parents, right?” Jungkook nods. “Mike opened up about this to me. I saw how much it hurt him. He was lonely, broken. And I…” this is being way harder than you expected. You shrug, shake your head. “I don’t know. I was just being my stupid self. I thought I could… I wanted to fix him. I realized that I have this heroine complex, you know?” You side eye him sheepishly. “But there are a lot of things I can’t fix… I’m better at breaking things, not fixing them.”

“Don’t say that. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to help people.” The confidence in which Jungkook says this makes, yet again, an odd sensation set in your stomach.

It is probably the first time Jungkook managed to make you blush in your entire life.

A little more silence.

“Did you actually like him?” You can barely hear his voice.

You have no idea why he’s making this questions. Why is he bringing up Mike after so long?

“Well… yes.” You can’t lie right now. “I did.” You make sure to reinforce the did. It’s in the past.

Jungkook nods and says nothing. He takes another banana milk from the plastic bag and opens it.

You inhale, building up your courage to ask something you’ve been wanting to know for a long time. He touched this subject anyway.

“You asked me something, now it’s my turn to ask you something.” Jungkook nods. You have the feeling that he already knows what’s coming. “Why did you break up with Yeri?”

“She broke up with me.”

Oh.

“Why?” You repeat. You can see that Jungkook gets clearly uncomfortable, but you’re not letting him go without an answer - and he already knows how stubborn you can be, too. He shifts, tilts his head, exhales heavily.

“It just didn’t work out.”

“But you liked her. And she liked you, too.” It was pretty obvious to anyone that saw them together.

Jungkook takes a long while to speak again. “I did like her. A lot.” The way his voice sounds fragile surprises you. Seeing him like this is very rare. Jungkook isn’t one to get all emotional too often. It seems that confessing this to you is important to him, somehow.

It also scares you a tiny bit. What if Jungkook still likes her, just like you suspected in the past?

“I didn’t want things to end the way they did.” He continues. His eyes are far away, watching old memories. His shoulders seem tense. He fiddles with the small banana milk bottle between his fingers. “But… some things aren’t meant to be, it doesn’t matter how much you want them to.”

This answer sounds… way too vague. Not what you want to hear. You know there’s more behind their break up, but just by looking at Jungkook you see that he isn’t telling you anything else. Well, this is the most he ever said about his past relationship in almost one year. It’s better than nothing.

And back to silence.

You want to push this awkwardness away. But how? You don’t feel as close to Jungkook as you always were. It’s not as if you could simply say anything in this moment… especially because, somehow, you feel that Jungkook expects you to do something, even though he came all the way to your apartment just to talk.

Say something, goddamnit!

“I’m sorry.” you blurt out.

Jungkook looks at you, but you’re not strong enough to look back at him. You hold the tiny bottle so tightly that it might get smashed at any moment; that’s just how nervous you are.

“Sorry for what?” he asks quietly. You hear the expectation in his voice… almost as if he’s holding his breath.

You can’t help but gulp. I’m not good with this type of thing.

“For everything.” you hate the way your voice sounds so damn fragile. Being sincere like this is somehow… painful. But that’s what Jungkook expects of you: sincerity. So you keep talking, although you don’t know the right words to express yourself. “I… I don’t know why things got like this between us…” you almost gasp. “I mean, I know why. We know why. And I feel very responsible.”

“You have this habit of taking the blame to yourself, isn’t it?” He murmurs. Jungkook shakes his head softly and passes his hand on his hair.

“But I was the one to propose it in the first place.”

“And I agreed.”

“Okay, but…” you have to stop for a moment to recover your breath. “I don’t know, I just feel sorry. I didn’t think of anyone except me all along. I’ve been an awful person to you… and awful friend. Also…” you need to stop again. Why is it so hard to speak? It feels as if there’s something obstructing your throat; the words hardly come out. “What I did that day at Joy’s house… it was wrong. I’m sorry that I made you upset that day.”

Jungkook sighs heavily. You’re still scared to look at him.

“I’m sorry about that day, too. I was rude to you.” Is he apologizing for calling you a slut while you had sex in the bathroom? Well, you definitely didn’t care about that. “I feel sorry too, Y/N. The way we drifted apart from each other…” he gesticulates with his finger between you and him. “The fault is on us both. I already told you, you shouldn’t take all the responsibility to yourself. We were both stupid.”

“Very stupid.” you both chuckle. You feel your heart lightening up for a moment; that strong tension still hovers around you, but now it feels like a different type of tension. Seeing that tiny smile in Jungkook’s lips makes your heart race.

You finally look at each other.

The shadows of the night paint Jungkook’s face. His hair sways with the wind softly. His dark eyes shine as much as diamonds. You never really understood the expression “to get lost in someone’s eyes…”

Well… now you do.

The small moment you two share feels fragile… featherlight. You’re scared that if you say or do something wrong, it’ll break and disappear. You’re scared to break him. To break yourself. This makes you remember that, ever since you were kids, Jungkook has always been the most fragile of you two. He has always been the most sensitive, the one to get hurt easily. Jimin was right all along. How could you do this to him? Why did you let this happen between you two?

“I missed you.” your voice is barely a whisper. Admitting this makes you feel exposed and relieved at the same time. Your throat feels even tighter.

“I missed you, too.” he confesses.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too.”

You smile at each other.

That’s the moment you almost confess something more… your confused feelings for him. You feel the urge to say that you don’t see him as just a friend anymore; that you don’t want to be just a friend anymore.

But something holds you back.

This is maybe the moment when you’re finally being able to reconcile. You don’t know if Jungkook feels the same about you; you don’t want to push him away by throwing your feelings over him. This might destroy you friendship forever.

Then, you decide to keep it all to yourself. At least for now.

“So,” Jungkook says, sighing. “What about that group project?”

You quirk one eyebrow up. “I’m pretty sure you know about the group project.”

Jungkook giggles. “Jimin has been annoying you, too?” you nod. He shakes his head. “He’s a little shit, isn’t he?”

“Yes. He had good intentions, at least.” You shrug.

“He could be a little more subtle, though.” You can’t help but agree. “Congratulations for getting the highest grade.”

“Thank you. Jimin also told me that you’ve been talking to some important people…”

Jungkook smiles beautifully with this. “Yes. It’s a director. He said that he likes my work and that I have talent. I think he’ll invite me to work with him as a trainee for a while.” Your eyes widen in a surprised expression.

“Really?! That’s great, Kook!” It feels so nice to call him Kook again after so long. Slowly, you feel that unbearable tension vanishing and all that’s left is you and him. Two people that know each other better than you know yourselves for most of your lives. In a matter of seconds, the distance that put you apart for months seems to disappear.

Suddenly, you feel a cold drizzle start falling over your heads. Jungkook frowns. “I think we should get down there.”

“Yes.” Before you can think better, you blurt out: “You can sleep here if you want.” Perhaps you shouldn’t have said that, because Jungkook’s frown deepens as he stares at you with suspicion. A shiver of fear runs down your spine. “Hey, that’s not what I mean.” You’re quick to say, waving your hands. “Before this sex thing started there was just us, remember? I… I miss us.”

Jungkook thinks for some moments, his eyes never leaving yours.

Then, a tiny smile makes its way to his lips - and you’re happy to see that the smile reaches his eyes, too. “Okay.”

“Wait- so Irene and Jennie made up?” Jungkook asks from the kitchen, surprised.

“That’s what it looks like. I mean, they did post some photos together on Instagram.” you say while adjusting the pillows and blankets on the mattress you placed in the living room. Yours’ and Seulgi’s friends come to sleep over a lot, so you’re used to do it - you even bought some spare sheets and blankets for this occasion.

“But you can’t be sure that they are together just because of some photos.”

“Yeah, but you know Seulgi. She jumped to conclusions. Being honest, they don’t look like a couple in these photos… but I don’t think there’s anything I can say that will change her mind at this point. I tried everything.”

“I don’t really think that they’ll make up this time.” Jungkook admits. You walk over to the kitchen and lean on the counter, opposite to him.

“I feel bad for her. Seulgi still loves Irene and she can’t get over it. I think it’s the first time she spends the night out in a long while… and it isn’t even to have fun. I’m worried.”

He pouts and shrugs, eyes focused in building up his sandwich. “Maybe we should just let her figure things out by herself.”

“But she’s doing nothing.”

Jungkook stops adding ketchup just to stare at you and quirk his eyebrows. “Y/N. I think I already said that you should stop trying to be a cupid, like… a million times.”

“I didn’t say I’d do something!” You do your best to sound offended.

“I know you, woman. I’ve seen this face many times. You look like an evil gremlin.”

“I don’t!” you cross your arms. You forgot how annoying it is that Jungkook knows you so well, because you did think of doing something to help her. You’re so tired of seeing you friend being sad all the time. All she does these days is watch Netflix and complain. She already started to look like a zombie at this point. No one can blame you for being concerned. “Besides, gremlins are cute.”

“You’re the only person on this planet that thinks this.” He shakes his head slightly, his hair waving in the process.

“Why did you let your hair grow so much?” You ask, resting your chin over your palm.

“Because I look good with long hair.” Jungkook shrugs, a smug smirk on his face.

“You cocky little shit.”

“Am I wrong for telling the truth?” He looks up at you again, playful. You can’t even tell he’s wrong: that long hair really matches his looks and personality.

“Hey, are you still helping Namjoon and Yoongi?” you ask when Jungkook starts to make a fourth sandwich. Yes, you guys do eat a lot.

“Yeah. I haven’t been to the studio in a few days, but they still call me whenever they need me.” Jungkook presses his lips together and shifts a little: nervousness. “I… I kind of helped them write a song.”

“Really? But you said you were just ‘lending’ them your voice to record demos.”

“Yeah, but I felt kind of inspired. It was just for fun, though.” He shifts his eyes to you then back to the sandwich very rapidly. “Maybe I’ll let you listen to it any other day.”

“Aw, come on! I’ve been wanting to listen to your songs for so long!” you whine.

“I said maybe. When the right time comes.”

You don’t really get what he means with it.

For a while, you just sit there and watch Jungkook. He looks so carefree and relaxed; he moves around the kitchen as if it’s his own house. He knows where everything is in the cabinets. In a way, this really is his second house considering how often he comes… even when he used to come just to fuck during these past months. It feels so nice to see him not being all tensed up and uncomfortable around you anymore. He even starts to sing quietly, his voice as sweet and smooth as cotton candy filling up the entire house. You’re one of the few people that Jungkook feels confident enough to sing around. It’s almost a privilege.

You have been staring at him unceremoniously for so long that Jungkook frowns and looks back at you, frowning. “What?”

“Nothing.” You shake your head. “It’s just that… Namjoon is right. You could’ve been famous with this voice.” Jungkook smiles shyly. “And this face.” He turns around to open the fridge. “And this ass.”

He frowns. “Seriously?”

“What? I’m being honest. And don’t act like you don’t stare at my ass all the time.”

Jungkook chuckles and shakes his head in that way that means I can’t stand you.

“Done.” He claps his hands together. Four giant sandwiches, coke, popcorn and m&ms (let’s say that you and Seulgi don’t have exactly the healthier type of food at home).

“Okay. I’ll take these, get changed first if you want,” you say while taking the plates to the living room. Of course there would be some of his clothes at your place.

When Jungkook sees the clothes you chose, he stares at you with an outraged expression. “My grey hoodie!”

“…yes.”

“You said you didn’t know where it was!”

You stop and click your tongue. “…funny how I found it at the bottom of my drawer tonight, huh?”

He knows you’re lying. But you won’t tell him that slept wearing his hoodie some nights because it smelled like him. He doesn’t need to know this.

“Hoodie thief.” He says and taps your head jokingly, making his way to the bathroom. You’re wearing sleeping clothes as well - and you made sure to choose your ugliest and largest ones. You don’t want Jungkook to think you asked him to sleep here just to end up having sex.

He comes back and throws himself on the mattress by your side. You’re very aware of the immense space between you; another person could fit in here. “What are we going to watch?”

“I think I’ve watched the entire Netflix catalogue at this point because of Seulgi.” you admit, shoving popcorn inside your mouth. Jungkook takes your phone and scrolls down the Netflix page.

“There’s always something more to watch.”

You end up arguing about what movie to watch. Actually, you spend more time arguing and scrolling down through the Netflix endless catalogue than watching something.

You don’t touch each other not even once. The physical distance almost feels like a living being.

You end up giving up on Netflix and watching Avengers Endgame for the hundredth time anyway.

And yes - Jungkook cries at the ending of the film.

You wake up with the sunlight touching your face.

It’s awful. You close your eyes tightly and yawn, a little bit confused at first. What am I doing in the living room? You search for your phone to check the hour: it’s seven in the morning. Shit. Whenever you can sleep until late hours, you end up waking up early…

You turn your head to the side and freeze.

It’s Jungkook.

Now you remember everything. The TV is still on, which means both of you fell asleep while watching it. The empty plates and glasses are placed over the coffee table.

You never slept together before.

There was only one time when it happened - the first and only, when you two got wasted and the whole story started. Other than that, you never slept together. First, because you had more interesting things to do other than sleep. Second, because sleeping together feels way too intimate. It didn’t matter how tired you were after fucking, when you finished cleaning up, you’d both put your clothes back on and walk back to your respective homes. You vehemently avoided doing anything that might feel too intimate - kissing, sleeping together… after a while, you even avoided looking at each other right in the eye while having sex.

You’re not touching; there is still a great space between your bodies. Yet… just the thought that you slept with Jungkook makes your heart race.

You don’t move a single centimeter. You just lay there and… look at him.

His long hair is a mess. His face is adorably puffy, lips slightly parted. He looks peaceful. The way his chest moves up and down as he breathes is hypnotizing.

He’s seriously so beautiful.

But now, you don’t think of it in a sexual way. Back then, you’d always admire how hot Jungkook is, his godlike physique, how lucky you were to be having sex with a guy like him… not now. You just feel mesmerized by his features. The long eyelashes touching his cheeks. The tiny moles on his face and neck. Some old acne scars.

It’s odd, but right now, you realize just how much you’ve been missing him. It doesn’t make sense - Jungkook is right here, barely an arm apart from you. You made up last night and it seems that everything is back to normal. Still, you desperately miss him.

Your chest fills up with something strange and unknown. It’s sweet and painful. It makes your heart feel tight, your nerves feel like burning and your eyes well up with tears.

This is the face of the person that has been with you during most of your life.

He’s a part of you.

The most important part of you.

In this moment, your feelings for him are so great that it seems that they can’t even fit inside of you anymore.

You watch him sleep for a long time, too scared to move and wake him up. But eventually, he sighs heavily and moves his head, indicating he’s about to wake up.

His eyes finally open and he yawns.

“Good morning.” He says when his eyes focus on you, smiling softly. Jungkook’s voice sounds deep and raspy. He stretches his arms over his head. “I mean… if it’s still morning.”

“It is,” you say softly.

He stares at the ceiling with heavy-lidded eyes. “I dreamed that babies came from eggs. Like ostrich eggs.” He chuckles. “And women gave birth to the eggs like chickens.”

You don’t say anything and just keep watching him instead.

Jungkook finally turns his head at you and frowns, still smiling softly. “What?”

“Nothing.” You say so quietly that he can barely hear.

He gazes back at you.

Slowly, the smile on his lips disappears.

You feel the tension building up around you - but this time it feels different. It’s not a bad tension like what you experienced last night at the terrace, nor is it dense like when you two were aroused and desperate to find a place and please yourselves. This time, it feels delicate but heavy nevertheless. It makes your blood boil and your heart race.

Jungkook’s eyes are serious, heavy and intense over you. All the playfulness is gone. None of you say a word. You don’t even know if you have the power to move considering how heavy the tension is.

He extends his arm and his fingertips touch your cheek. Your skin feels burning hot. Delicately, he puts a strand of hair behind your ear. It’s strange how he’s doing the exact same thing Taehyung did, but with Jungkook, this simple touch made you feel like exploding right there.

Jungkook is the one to come closer. Closer and closer and closer. Your breathing is heavy. He caresses your cheek his his thumb. Soon, his face is right in front of yours - noses touching, eyes locked and burning with something you can’t quite name.

You stare at each other like this for a moment until his gaze finally drops to your mouth.

You both lean in for the kiss at the same time.

You have already tasted these lips multiple times before - but now, it’s different. The kiss is slow; you move your lips unhurriedly and sweetly. Yet, this kiss feels much more intense than any other you have shared before. None of those times when you kissed him desperately with luxury being the only thing on your mind comes even close to the intensity of this kiss.

It almost feels that this is the actual first time you kiss Jungkook.

Your breathing gets even heavier as the kiss deepens. His hand rests on your waist, while yours hold his neck. The sloppy sounds of your lips and tongues moving together are the only audible thing in the apartment. Your whole being screams in excitement and anticipation when Jungkook moves his body to hover over yours, not even once breaking the kiss. Your right hand grabs his smooth hair while the other travels up and down his back; your body is getting burning hot. Jungkook moans very softly. You start to feel the familiar wetness on your panties.

Jungkook leans away for a moment; his lips are red and swollen, his hair is even messier now, his dark eyes are clouded with want and something you can’t name - something so strong that he’s able to make you shiver with that look alone. He leans down again and starts to kiss and suck your neck very slowly, making soft moans escape through your lips. His hand sneaks under your baggy shirt and he squeezes your breast. Soon, his lips are on yours again and the kiss becomes much deeper. You can already feel sweat forming on your forehead. Jungkook starts to grind on you; you can clearly feel his clothed erection rub against your own core, what makes more and more strangled moans come from both of you.

This is the hottest make out session of your life. The entire atmosphere is not what you’re used to; it’s not playful, none of you say a word. No teasing, no dirty talk. All you do is try to touch each other the best you can, never once breaking the kiss. It’s as if, with this kiss, you’re having a conversation… you’re telling each other everything you’re not brave enough to say out loud.

Soon, the desperation becomes too big. There’s no time to play, you just want to have him inside of you and feel his warm skin against yours. Unceremoniously, you start to undress yourselves, kissing every spot you can find in the process - neck, chest, stomach. Your clothes are thrown around the living room. You lay on your back again and Jungkook hovers above you once more, your legs entangling around his hips as he positions his hard member on your entrance.

You always avoided this position because it is too intimate; you’re forced to look at each other like this. This time, though, it doesn’t matter. You want to look at him - and the sight of his face contorting in pure pleasure, lips parted and eyes closed tightly as he eases himself inside of you, is almost as good as the feeling of being stretched after a long time.

Jungkook doesn’t move at first. He knows he’ll hurt you if he goes too hard right from the beginning. Instead, he waits until you call his name quietly in a strangled moan - the sign he needs to start thrusting. He rests his head on your shoulder and grabs the pillow under your head tightly as he picks up his pace, slow and steady, soft groans coming from the back of his throat that make you feel goosebumps. You hold his back with both hands. You can’t shut the moans anymore.

Sweat makes your skin slippery as he thrusts faster. Jungkook licks and bites your ear, moaning right into it, and it feels that this alone could make you cum. He then leans away for a moment, creating some space between your bodies to have a better angle to keep smashing himself into you - faster and faster, stronger and stronger. The usual sound of skin hitting skin, heavy breathing and moans is all you can hear.

You said that you didn’t ask him to sleep here just to have sex - and you weren’t lying.

But this doesn’t feel like just sex.

This isn’t fucking.

The pleasure is getting unsustainable and you both feel it. You close your legs around him even tighter and pull his face with both hands, sealing your lips in another intense, desperate kiss. It’s sloppy and unsynchronized. It’s raw and rough and so full of emotions you can’t comprehend that you feel your eyes tearing up again.

What you’re experiencing right now isn’t just two people finding pleasure in each other. It isn’t simply carnal instinct.

It is the deepest and most sincere way to connect with another being - without any words, through touches only.

You never felt anything like this in your life - not with Mike or any of your past boyfriends and hook ups. This is beyond lust. This is beyond sex.

Jungkook breaks the kiss apart for a second to look at you. Your gazes lock. God, he’s beautiful. Not only his appearance, but everything about him is beautiful.

And it is right now - stating deep into his eyes - that you come to a conclusion.

Jungkook has always been a part of you. But, in this exact moment, it feels like more.

It feels that you two became one.

He leans down and kisses you again. Your lips are tightly sealed when you both come at the same time.

Your trembling fingers still hold the strands of his damp hair tightly. You caress his face softly, putting some hair away from his eyes. Jungkook kisses you again. And again, and again, and again, and again.

You’re glad when he rests his head on your shoulder again, because like this, he can’t see the tears trickling down your temples.

It’s still hard to understand what just happened. Honestly, you think you’ll never fully understand.

But one thing you do understand, one thing that became as clear as the morning sky, is that your feelings for Jungkook are deeper and stronger than you ever imagined. He’s so much more than a friend.

Yet, you don’t know if he sees you the same way.

You don’t know if he felt the same things you did or if this was just one more time having sex with you. You don’t know if he still has feelings for Yeri or if he’s developing any for Joy.

You know nothing - and this fact makes your heart hurt as if it is being stabbed…

Because Jungkook, the best and most important part of you, might never be truly yours.

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wackapedia · 4 years

Text

Man’s Best Friend

word count: 2k

Taehyung x reader where you move in with him and Yeontan hates you :(

Your relationship with Kim Taehyung is what others would consider as a whirlwind romance. In a span of two months, he had asked you to move in with him. Not that it took a lot of convincing, you’ve been giving subtle hints, paired with strong suggestions and mild intimidations for him to ask you to move in with him in his personal apartment. Taehyung couldn’t stop talking about you to his friends, it was almost sickening. His bandmates had also raised their concern about Taehyung’s relationship. “Don’t you think you guys are going too fast?” Namjoon asks after hearing about the news. “I don’t see why I should take it slow, I mean I am really sure of her, hyung.” Taehyung answers calmly. The group were eating their lunch together at one of BigHit’s conference rooms. “But are you really sure?” Jin pushes. “Ah, what’s so special about her?” Jimin adds. This somehow offends Taehyung as he slams his chopsticks. Hoseok bounces in his seat. “Why is it so hard for you to be happy for me? Is it so unbelievable for someone to love me for who I am?” Taehyung loudly announces, startling the rest of the group. “Taehyung, you know that’s not what we meant. Come sit.” Yoongi coaxes but Taehyung is already on the door.

Taehyung tries to control his riled-up breathing inside the elevator and pulls out his phone to text you. Taetae: Where are you? Your reply came almost instantly. “My place, packing up :)” “I’ll pick you up. Be there soon.” He replies as he arrives at the basement parking.

Taehyung arrives at your place and quietly helps you load up your things in his car’s spacious compartment. The drive to his place was quiet, giving you the impression that it was a bad day at work. “Are you okay? What happened?” you gently ask. Taehyung forces a tight lipped smile and reaches his hand to yours. You let him take it, accepting it as an answer. He would occasionally kiss the back of your hand whenever traffic allows, prompting his mood to lighten up. By the time you arrive, he’s back to his normal cheerful self.

“I can’t wait for you to meet Yeontan” He excitedly states, dragging your luggage behind him. “w-who?” “Yeontan, my dog. Didn’t I tell you about him?” You both stop at the hallway of the apartment building. “No! Why didn’t you tell me you have a dog?” You ask agitatedly. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t know this would be a problem...” Taehyung frowns. You take a while to collect your thoughts “It’s fine.” You exhale, tightly closing your eyes. “It’s not a problem, it’s just that I’ve never lived with a dog before.” Taehyung’s eyes fill with glee “Oh, he’ll love you.” He pulls you toward his apartment. “There’s always a first time for everything, Jagiya!”

Taehyung unlocks the door, letting you in before pulling your luggage in. The place was large, every surface filled with little knick-knacks. Soon, the silence was filled with pattering against the floor, gradually getting louder. The small black Pomeranian comes into view, rushing toward his owner. “Yeontan!” Taehyung crouches down to pick his dog up, carrying him like a baby. “Tannie, this is y/n! She’s gonna live with us!” He faces you, holding the dog’s paw, making the dog wave at you. “Annyeonghaseo!” Taehyung uses a tiny voice to greet you. The dog however, stares at you with his large dark eyes. He fusses in Taehyung’s arms, prompting his owner that he wants to be let down. Yeontan continues to quietly stare at you.

The rest of the night was spent unpacking your clothes, eating takeout, and cuddling in bed. You were both too exhausted to do anything else which was why at 11 pm, you were both knocked out, snoring in bed.

You were awakened by the shrill barking of Taehyung’s dog in the middle of the night. You didn’t want to wake him up so you went to check on the dog yourself. You opened the door to reveal Yeontan barking in front of you. You quickly stepped out and quietly shut the door so that his owner won’t be disturbed.

“H-hey, what’s wrong?” You try to gently ask the dog. He continues to bark and growl at you while keeping a distance between you. “Are you hungry? I’m sure you had dinner when we were eating…” You stepped aside him to get him some snacks when Yeontan, angrier than ever, growls at you. You couldn’t help but scream when the dog tries to bite at your foot. Taehyung immediately gets up and rushes to open the door to find you cornered by the dog against the wall. “Yah! Yeontan!” The dog’s owner jogs toward the scene at the end of the hallway, gently pushing his dog away from you. “Are you okay? What happened?” He kneels to check on your foot which was fortunately unharmed. “He was barking outside the bedroom door and I thought I should just feed him but he tried to bite me…” You explain. Yeontan was standing behind Taehyung and continues to bark at you. “Aish, stop it!” Taehyung uses his foot to slide the small dog away, and ushers you back to the bedroom. “I’m sorry for waking you.” You apologize as he tucks you back to bed. “I’m sorry my dog attacked you. I’ve never seen him like this…” Taehyung kisses your forehead and pulls himself closer to you. “Let’s go back to sleep.”

Outside, Yeontan sadly stares at the bedroom door.

The next two days consisted of you and Yeontan being civil and ignoring each other while co-existing in Taehyung’s apartment. He would still bark at you but at least he doesn’t attack you anymore. Meanwhile in the BigHit office, the rest of the group apologizes to Taehyung for Jimin’s comment. “Taehyung, as a sign of good faith, we’re inviting her for dinner tonight at the dorm!” Jin cheerfully offers. Taehyung fails to keep a strict face upon hearing this news. “Really, Hyung?” He asks, looking at his hyungs for approval. “Of course! We want to meet who’s keeping our Taehyungie happy!” Hoseok adds. Taehyung breaks into a full grin, giving his members a group hug. Jin and Namjoon share a “see? I told you” look.

Taehyung immediately shares this news with you, giving you a call as soon as he steps out of the room. This immediately sent you into a frenzy, thinking about what you should wear, and what food should you bring. “Hey Jagi, don’t stress, alright? I’m sure they’ll love you.” “That’s what you said when I met your dog…” You pout. “G-good point.” His smile drops for a while. “I’ll pick you up at five?” Taehyung offers. “I’m not sure if I’ll be ready by then…” You answer, already making a checklist for the evening. “I said don’t stress. I mean it, okay? Love you…” The call ends. You immediately bolt to the kitchen to prepare.

Rain pours harder than ever that afternoon. You have just finished preparing the food you will be taking to the dorm to impress Taehyung’s friends. You were finishing your hair, tying it neatly with a red ribbon that matches your dress. You suddenly remembered something. Wine! You quickly text Taehyung to drop by and pick up wine for the boys.

Taetae: But I’m on the way there y/n: Pleaseee I need you to get some. It’s my reputation on the line here! y/n: Thanks baby, drive safe. I’ll meet you at the dorm

Your last message remained unread for the next couple of minutes. You decide to just take a cab and wait for your boyfriend at the dorm. You wouldn’t want to give a tardy impression on the boys.

Taehyung arrives at his apartment before realizing you’ve already left. He checks his phone and reads your last text from 15 minutes ago before proceeding to smack himself in the forehead. He turns back to the door when he feels a cold wind caressing his arm, causing him to shiver. He looks back to find the sliding door of the balcony was left open. The moist air flows through the opening the size of an open palm. Taehyung shuts the balcony door, carefully dodging the wet patch on the floor. Just as the thunder claps outside, he remembers Yeontan. No wonder apartment was suspiciously quiet, he tells himself. “Tannie!” He calls out, Taehyung’s voice echoing through the apartment. “Tannie, Here boy!” He tries to shake the dog’s food plate but there was not a single bark. Taehyung looks around the apartment, under the bed, inside closets to find it void of his dog. He was starting to get desperate when his phone started ringing. “Taehyung-ssi, where are you? I found your girlfriend waiting for you outside the dorm and it’s raining real hard! What kind of a boyfriend are you?!” Seokjin nags the maknae’s ear off. “Sorry, sorry I’m on my way. Yeontan is missing.” He quickly puts on his shoes and leaves his apartment.

You were surprised to find that the boys were very friendly with you. As soon as you entered the warm dorm after almost freezing outside while waiting for your boyfriend, all the boys gathered to help you with the food you were bringing while giving you a towel to wipe the rain from you. “Whoa that smells good!” Jungkook comments when he gets a whiff of the food you were bringing. “You should’ve just knocked when you arrived, we would’ve let you in.” Namjoon lets you sit on the couch after the rest of them introduce themselves to you. Seokjin excuses himself to call Taehyung, possibly scolding him for being late. When he returns, he announces that dinner is ready. “As punishment for Taehyung, we’ll start dinner without him!”

Everyone complements the food you prepared. There was supposedly enough for everyone but you were surprised by their appetite. “I can’t believe lamb chops could be this good!” Hoseok was clearly having a good time eating the food you made for them. Jungkook couldn’t even be bothered to look up from his plate as he enjoyed the food so much. Rain continued to pour harder outside. You were starting to worry for Taehyung when a loud bang startles you from your seat. The front door slams shut and Taehyung enters, drenched by the rain. “Taehyungie, where have you been? Why are you drenched?” Yoongi asks. Taehyung’s face remain unreadable. “Tae, come eat. We saved you some of the food I made…” You beckon him from your seat at the dining table. “Where’s Yeontan?” He asks, his voice dangerously low. “Taehyung, I can’t believe you’ve been keeping her from us! Her cooking is magnificent!” Jin laughs. “I asked you a question. Where is Yeontan?” Taehung repeats. The mood shifts, causing the members to side-eye each other, wondering why he was behaving this way. “I..I don’t know. He wasn’t there when I left, I’m sure he’s just somewhere.” You answer, suddenly feeling small as your boyfriend stares you down. “The balcony door was open when I came home.” “He could’ve ran away-“ “We live in the 38th floor, y/n! He didn’t just run away!” He yells, making you jolt in your seat. “Tae, you’re upsetting her…” Jimin scolds him. “Oh, now you’re defending her? Weren’t you badmouthing her just two days ago? She brings you food and suddenly you’re all fond of her?” Taehyung snaps, fierce eyes roaming through everyone seated at the dinner table. “Tae, come on its just a dog-“ Namjoon speaks when he gets cut off by Taehyung slamming his fist against the table. “He’s not just my dog, he’s my best friend! He’s my only friend!” Taehyung breaks down crying, doubling everyone’s worry. You stare at Taehyung, blank faced. His tears run down his cheeks, further soaking his rain-drenched shirt. His eyes shift towards you, as if knowing what you’ve done. He eyes the lamb chops with familiarity.

#kim taehyung x reader #taehyung x reader #bts x reader

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apsaraqueen · 4 years

Note

For the ask: Love & Sleep. I started listing questions and then realised there were only 5 I missed out, so... ALL OF THE QUESTIONS PLEASE. I WANT TO KNOW ALL YOUR BRAIN THOUGHTS ABOUT LS.

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

There’s a lot of ways to interpret this question! In terms of substance, I wanted to write the kind of classic “the Shitennou come back” fic for Jadeite and Rei (my OTP, of course) that I’ve always wanted to read - something long and layered that deals with what happens after the initial shock, distrust, etc. of the return and delves into what the process of forgiveness and rediscovery might really look like. And to be clear, I’ve definitely read a lot of wonderful takes on this concept, it’s not new and so many other authors have done it better, but I haven’t found any that focused on my favorite couple (if there’s one I’ve missed, PLEASE SEND IT TO ME). And then stylistically, I just kind of wanted to write something...indulgent. For myself, really. Slow-paced, dreamy, gentle. I hope it hits the mark.

2: What scene did you first put down?

Boringly enough - the first scene! Where Jadeite, now called Junin, comes back, taking place on the grounds of the shrine. I had the image in my head for a long time before I started the fic.

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

I...have no idea. It honestly changes all the time. I’ll just pick a random one I like. It’s of Rei watching Junin (the reincarnated Jadeite) sleep. Not creepy at all, right? I like the level of comfort between the two it implies, and it’s just a tender, quiet moment with her thinking of him, and of what draws her to him.

Junin slept on his back, one arm tucked under his nape, the other tossed across his front; the length of his legs extended several centimeters past the rumpled sheets’ edge. A book propped on his chest bore an English title that made little sense to her. She knelt by his head, suddenly concerned he might be feverish, or taken ill. He wasn’t sweating, nor ashen. The priestess touched his forehead and found the temperature not dissimilar to her own.

Under her palm his eyebrows bristled, permanently arched where hers ran like the ties of train tracks. She felt fine sun-lines there that she couldn’t see. Against her fingers his hair was dense, grown now slightly off the scalp, lightened more from working outdoors. She took back her hand, put it in her lap. From time to time it still startled her, to be able to look at him like this, unrationed. Even here at rest, she thought there was control in his features, a kind of ruthless calm she’d never been able to help responding to.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

This is really hard because I wouldn’t call this a dialogue-driven fic. Why, you ask? Because I can’t write dialogue to save my life. A lot of this fic - maybe even the majority - exists between the spaces of what’s said, so the dialogue is pretty.........formless. If I had to pick, I’d probably go with this.

“I killed you,” she said, and couldn’t help but add, “twice.”

“You were right,” he told her.

“And I didn't want to,” she went on dully. “When you came I – thought you were a ghost.”

“You wish I were?”

“I wish I didn’t remember. What we did.”

“Them,” said Junin. “Not us.”

She said, low: “I wish we’d done – anything else.”

I liked writing this because while I definitely think there’s a part of Rei struggling to forgive Junin for what his past self did, I also think there’s maybe even a larger part that wishes none of it happened at all, that their history could be erased and they could start fresh, that recognizes culpability is often complex and not as one-sided as you maybe want it to be (this of course depends on how you headcanon the Silver Millennium going down - I like to imagine it wasn’t necessarily all Shitennou=bad, Senshi=good).

5: What part was hardest to write?

Urg. Writing the first Silver Millennium flashback was pretty hard. It took me forever to figure out the right tone that didn’t sound horribly stilted and Lord of the Rings-esque. Also hard trying to convey the differences between Mars/Jadeite and Rei/Junin along with the similarities. Rei, for example, is a lot more wounded and careful with her emotions, for obvious reasons, than Mars ever was. And while Junin is still capable of being somewhat morally ambiguous, he’s also genuinely a nicer guy than the more politically-minded Jadeite could be. I wanted to get that across without getting mired in irrelevant details about the past……….which I maybe need to save for another longwinded fic altogether. *bangs head on wall*

After the first flashback things fell into line, more or less, but I must have rewritten that first one, like, ten times.

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

It’s longer than 12,000 words! AND took me more than double that to get to any smut! In seriousness, I think this is the first multichaptered fic I’ve written since, like.............high school.

7: Where did the title come from?

From the poem of the same name by A.C. Swinburne. It’s quite sexy, and the woman described in it sounds very much like Rei to my mind.

8: Did any real people or events inspire any part of it?

Normally, with most of my fics, I’d say yes...but in this case, not really. Other than the food. I most definitely drew on real-life inspiration - delicious things I’ve eaten, particularly while in Tokyo - for the food. You’ll never find me writing a fic without some gratuitous food pr0n in there for good measure. The wagashi shop the girls meet at is based on one I visited while there, actually.

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

Not really. You could say this is in some ways an alternate version of another fic I wrote a while back, Tragedia? When I wrote that one I had in the back of my mind that someday I should write the same concept with a very different ending...and here we are.

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

Because I love them! And I feel like I rarely see them happy in fic (to be clear, I do love my RxJ angst, so that’s not a bad thing!). I wanted to write a story for them that felt realistic and for lack of a better word, adult - that progressed in a natural way. I wanted to challenge myself to do it in a way that was slow-burning and relatively low-drama but not boring. And I wanted to see if I could sustain the tension and intimacy that makes their relationship so interesting to write, without resorting to my usual go-tos of smut (at least not immediately!) and angst.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

I’m happy with the atmosphere it conveys - sometimes moody, mostly serene. I worked really hard on that aspect and I feel like it maybe, kind of, sort of paid off!

12: What do you like least about this fic?

I wish it was wittier, more humorous in some places - I feel like it would add a sense of balance. That’s my biggest failing as a writer, I think; I really have no clue how to do comedy. I am not funny in the slightest.

13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

I had just seen Call Me By Your Name when I started writing it, so a lot of the soundtrack for that. Mystery of Love in particular. Also a lot of Rhye.

14: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

Learn? No, I don’t think so. Just trying to put more of my OTP out in the world in hopes of inspiring more of it!

15: What did you learn from writing this fic?

So much. Like I’ve noted above, this is the longest thing I’ve written in a long time and honestly I’m kind of amazed I’ve been able to stay motivated! Writing something longer requires, obviously, patience - you can’t just fire all your guns at once, you think of things you want to write RIGHT AWAY but then have to save them for later, you have to actually, ugh, have a structure………….this is all patently clear to a competent writer, but these are things I was pretty sure I’d forgotten how to do, so it’s been nice stretching myself this way.

Thank you for the ask, @coppercrane2 - this was so fun!

#fic asks #jadeite x rei #rei x jadeite #mars x jadeite #jadeite x mars #hino rei #jadeite #senshi x shitennou #shitennou x senshi #sailor moon fanfiction

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lgcmanager · 3 years

Photo

MUSICAL ACTING MISSION 003

SCHEDULE TYPE: TRIMESTER (CAREER) SCHEDULE RESTRICTIONS: Cannot be paired with another trimester schedule, unless stated otherwise

on JANUARY 11, HEO AECHA has summoned all the trainees confirmed to be in the musical acting path, old and new. it’s early in the morning, yet the woman seems fully present and watches on the trainee in the room. “good morning everyone!” she says, fondly. “for those of you who only had the chance to meet me briefly, let me introduce myself. i am the head manager of LGC AGENCY, i oversee the careers of not only the company’s entertainers but also our other talents. which implies that i’m a busy woman and we won’t meet all too often, unfortunately. on a day to day basis, you will be taken in charge by your own manager; miss JEON DAHEE. this arrangement might come to change in the future.” she stares at them with a smile. “i have a lot of subjects to touch up, so let’s get to it!”

DORMS

“we’ve already sorted out all the living arrangements so for those of you who have chosen to stay in the dorms, you may move in starting from today. if you’ve chosen not to stay in the dorms, then you may also leave starting from today. however, those of you who have chosen to leave, please note that there isn’t to be any funny business from you all. if we hear of anything, you will immediately be sent back to the dorms. do i make myself clear?” she smiles at them but it’s clear that she is serious about her warning.

SNS

“the same rules will apply to you regarding your PUBLIC INDIVIDUAL INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT as it is with our other actors. you will be permitted to have an account once you meet the following conditions: first you must have completed a full trimester in this path and then have at least 6 posts on the legacy entertainment account. this will assure us that you know sns etiquette and that we can trust you with the content you will publish.”

DEBUT CONTRACT

“for those of new who are new, there are new legal grounds that we must go over now that you’ve moved over to lgc agency. here is your contract that you will need to sign and return as soon as possible. i’ll let you read over them on your own.”

( this is just an ic note, there is no need to submit this ooc )

MUSICAL AUDITION

“now that we’re done with the formalities, we can get to the fun part, can we? first of all, i must i am very satisfied to see you growing in number. it started out with only one of you, but i feel as though you will all learn a lot on this path. musical acting is a very difficult field that doesn’t bring forth a lot of fame in return. but the skills you will acquire during this journey will be something for others to watch out for. idols in particular could learn a lot from you in terms of live performance. of course, we will work to provide you with opportunities to get yourself known to the public. there’s actually one i am proud to present to you today, with the help of someone you all know very well.” she turns to the door, where KIM HYUNCHEOL, head manager of legacy entertainment, soon appears. they both exchange a polite smile as he walks up to stand next to her.

“hello everyone. i know you must be curious to hear about this announcement, so let’s not waste any time, shall we? i am proud to announce that we have partnered with CJ MEDIA and KBS2 to put together a special musical adaption of something you have certainly all watched or heard about before.” hyuncheol pauses and analyzes the trainees’ curious looks. “our regular trainees will also join you in this adventure. i hope you can guide them through this process, especially those of you with more experience.”

[ OOC NOTE: in order not to spoil the contents of the casting call 007 that will be posted shortly after this, we will not reveal what the musical is. ic, hyuncheol would of course announce it to them. make sure to check it out since the audition procedure will be explained then. ]

after greeting them, hyuncheol leaves them in aecha’s good hands. she takes a moment to look at each one. “i know what you must be thinking: you were specifically chosen for this path and yet, trainees will be able to participate. or maybe you’re looking forward to it. no matter your thoughts, i do agree with the head manager when he says he hopes you can act as guides and role models for them to follow. in fact, i’m counting on you. most of them will most likely be part of the ensemble cast, divided by skills. unlike you, they’re not expected to be proficient in all of the performance skills. so make sure to prepare yourselves a lot and meet our high standards.”

VERSATILITY WORKSHOPS

“we’re introducing special workshops from now until the end of march.”, she continues. “they will help hone your skills and learn more about the immense work that goes on behind the scenes. the musical theater community is very small and most performers and crew members know of each other. a reputation can so easily be made or shattered. as such, we want you to know exactly what these people do. the stylists, the costume designers, the props designers, the stage directors. they are essential to the musical production. without them, you don’t get to stand on stage. learn from them, respect them and you will become a beloved member of this wonderful community.”

she smiles. “trainees will also be taking these workshops. we expect you, of course, to attend them at least once. the rest is up to you but remember that musical acting requires you to be strong in acting, dancing, singing and many other things. you can’t afford to put all of your eggs in one basket like idols or actors could. that’s what makes you so special as well.”

“on February 1st, some of the workshops will feature very special guests, you will know more about it then.” she remains mysterious.

discover the special guests HERE (the post will be edited later tonight after the musical has been revealed). ooc, the trainees will not know who they are until the mentioned date.

“on top of it, since you are musical actors yourselves, we want to give you the opportunity to host your own workshop. you will be able to do this once during the course of the next three months. it’s up to you to choose which one you would feel most appropriate to teach. if you know nothing about hair & makeup, for example, i would advise you not to choose that... i hope i’m making myself clear?” to lighten the mood, aecha chuckles. “other trainees will be able to attend. feel free to decide of the contents, as long as they are appropriate and helpful in the context of a musical, of course.”

REQUIREMENTS

make sure to use the hashtag lgc:musicalmission for everything related to this event. you have until APRIL 3, 11:59 EST to complete the following requirements:

MUSICAL AUDITION: PLEASE CHECK CASTING CALL 007 FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THIS. on top of the requirements shown in the post, you will get +5 POINTS TO DISTRIBUTE ANYWHERE as bonus. it means you do not need to write two auditions! just link to your audition in the points form below to claim your bonus points.

VERSATILITY WORKSHOP (PARTICIPANT): write a 300+ words solo or a 4 replies (minimum 8 lines) thread with a trainee of any gender OR a fellow musical actor about attending one of the workshops mentioned above. the workshops taking place with special guests on february 1st will be filmed, so if you choose to write about it, make sure your muses are on their best behavior to avoid consequences or gaining a negative reputation.

VERSATILITY WORKSHOP (HOST): write a 300+ words solo or a 4 replies (minimum 8 lines) thread with a trainee of any gender OR a fellow musical actor about hosting the workshop of your choice. since they host on their own, your partner will have to be the one attending your muse’s workshop. for the muse who isn’t hosting, this thread can still count towards their requirement as a particpant whether it’s with a trainee or another musical actor.

the writing requirements for the musical itself will be revealed at a later date, but similar to how dramas work, it will be a different points form.

to validate your skill points and collect your notoriety points, please submit the following form ONCE on the points blog before APRIL 3, 11:59 EST.

TITLE: MUSE NAME ∙ MUSICAL MISSION 006

- MUSICAL AUDITION: +5 ( skill points distribution ) bonus [ LINK ] - VERSATILITY WORKSHOP (PARTICIPANT): +5 ( skill points distribution ), +2 notoriety [ LINK ] - VERSATILITY WORKSHOP (HOST): +5 ( skill points distribution ), +3 notoriety [ LINK ]

#lgc:musicalmission #lgc:event #lgc:q12021

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softboywriting · 5 years

Text

Both | Shawn Mendes

Summary: You and Shawn are unapologetically goofballs and you’re absolutely perfect for each other. New merchandise arrives and the two of you just have to test it out in your own special way. [fluff] [non au]

Word Count: 1k

|Masterlist In Bio|

The day the new merchandise arrives for the upcoming tour you are on set for Shawn's newest music video. The two of you have been going back and forth for months, debating whether or not to have you in the video with him. Eventually both of you decided you were confident enough in yourselves and your relationship that you were ready to do something like this.

Tension has been high on the set all day. You've been shooting for hours, going from location to location and you're finally settled down at the studio you started at. Everyone has been kind of trying to lighten the mood but it hasn't necessarily worked. Shawn is trying to get the director to listen to his ideas and he does, but he doesn't quite grasp what Shawn wants. Everyone is frustrated because the video isn't going as smoothly as planned and parts of it aren't flowing.

You head to the changing trailer and find Alissa, Andrew's assistant, has left some of the new merchandise in a bag for you with a note that has your name on it. She knew you loved to check out everything before it got finalized by the team and Shawn.

You smile to yourself. This would be a perfect way to lighten up the mood. You put on a shirt that has Shawn's name in his handwriting signed across a guitar on the front and a pair of sweatpants that have roses down the side and head for the set.

Shawn is filming a solo scene, laying on a couch in a fake living room set up. You sneak around behind the director and the sound and camera crew and stand just where Shawn can see you. It's then you start posing, dramatic arm over the face, a little exaggerated model strut, stop, pivot, and strut away. He starts laughing, waving off the cameras and calling a cut.

"Can we take a break?" He asks, getting up and going over to the director, Martin. "I just need to clear my head."

"Sure. Let's take a break and get some fresh air. Relieve some tension and regroup."

"Thanks." Shawn says and he walks over to you, a huge grin spreading across his face. It's nice. He's been in such a funk all day long he's barely looked like he's enjoyed your first video together. "Hey you," he smirks, hands going to your waist.

"Hey. Look what I found."

He looks you over. "Mmmhmm. Alissa must have brought it for you huh?"

"You knew it was coming?"

"Yeah. It arrived at Andrew's place last night and she said she was gonna bring it today."

You step back and take his hands, swinging them back and forth. "I think we need to test it."

"Oh absolutely." He grins, lifting you up with ease and carrying you to where you direct him over to the bag of stuff you brought with you from the trailer.

The first thing you do is try a few of the shirts. There's a pink one that is particularly ugly in your opinion. Now, you love pink, but this shirt was borderline salmon colored and the line art of Shawn's most recent floral tattoo is lost in it. You didn’t sit through a long as hell session with him for that tattoo not to be done justice on his merch. Next up is the hoodies. They're super soft and high quality, both with vivid coloring and embroidery. Shawn shucks his jeans and pulls on a pair of sweatpants to go with it.

"These are nice." He squats down a few times. "Real nice."

You pull on a pair and cross the empty area behind the living room set and squat down like a sumo wrestler. "So stretchy."

Shawn looks over and squats down, mimicking your pose. The two of you look like a couple of weirdos, wide squatting in the middle of an empty warehouse studio.

"We must give them the ultimate test!" Shawn laughs and starts doing an awkward crab walk forward with his legs spread wide.

You almost make it to him but you're both in tears from laughing so hard that you have to stop. You both collapse on the cold cement floor and Shawn pulls his hoodie drawstrings tight, creating a tiny hole for just his mouth.

"Kiss me." He says with his lips puckered and sticking out.

You pull your drawstrings and do the same thing with just your mouth exposed. "My love, I cannot see you!"

"Oh!" He laughs. "We must kiss our way to each other. There is no other way."

The next two minutes consists of the two of you scrambling around the floor trying to find one another blindly. When you finally do, you manage to miss his face like three times, kissing his eye and nose before your lips meet and you're cracking up laughing again.

"What are you guys doing?" Brain asks when he finds you guys behind the set being goofballs.

Shawn pulls the hoodie over his head and leans back on his elbows. "Trying out new merch."

"Quality control obviously Brian."

"Right. Well, I'm going to get lunch while you guys do...whatever this is."

"Okay bye." You laugh and wave him off. You look over to Shawn and he's got the collar of the salmon pink shirt in his mouth and one hand tucked up under the bottom hem, showing off his abs. "What the hell..."

"Am I sexy?" He asks with a choked off laugh.

"Dead sexy. The salmon really brings out your eyes." You let out a terrible little flirtatious growl like noise and he falls back laughing. You get up and peel off your hoodie, getting too hot from goofing around. "We should go get lunch while we can."

Shawn gets up and nods. "Yeah, and take the merch back to the trailer for Alissa."

You walk around in front of Shawn and he grabs your shoulder gently, turning you around to face him.

"Hold on."

"What's up?"

He smiles softly, eyes on yours. "You should keep this one." He gestures to the shirt you're wearing, one you put on out of the bag after the salmon one when you were trying on everything earlier. "My name looks good on you."

You pull the shoulder forward to glance back and see it's the one that says Mendes on the back across the shoulders like a jersey almost. "Are you just talking about the shirt or like y'know..."

He smirks and leans his head against yours. "Both."

End

-----

Thank you so much for reading ! Please Reblog if you enjoyed it :)) - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

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itsclydebitches · 4 years

Text

RWBY Recap: “As Above, So Below”

Welcome back, everyone. So. Last Saturday I was actually feeling pretty good about RWBY. Not as a whole, but for that particular episode because, as I explained to a lovely anon, not much happened. Sure, there were some semi-important bits in the form of meeting Willow and Weiss discovering the recording, but compared to everything else we’ve gotten this volume it was all around a tame fifteen minutes. Which meant there wasn’t much space for RWBY to mess things up. There simply weren’t any stakes last episode. You don’t like how the group gets past Whitley or the exact words Ironwood says to Jacques? It’s ultimately whatever in the grand scheme of things. Last episode was mostly details.

“As Above, So Below” is not that kind of episode. So much happens and I’m once again left metaphorically banging my head against the wall, not regarding the writing choices themselves per se, but rather at how they’re used and portrayed. There is so much that I want to enjoy about this episode but Rooster Teeth continually ignores aspects of a situation in order to highlight one very narrow, very biased viewpoint. The scenes throughout demand that we conveniently forget or outright ignore certain things in order to immerse ourselves in whatever emotion the writing has decided we should be feeling right now ... and I simply can’t do that. RWBY is a show based on the claim that it’s a bright sunny day, so pay no mind to the rain clouds hovering above your head. It’s the animated equivalent of a Jedi mind trick. These are not the interpretations you’re looking for.

Secrets are finally revealed, folks, and oh boy. It’s a hot mess.

But let’s start at the beginning.

Undermining my assumption last recap that Watts had dismantled something that was regulating just a portion of Mantle’s temperature---something specific to maintaining rain over snow---we learn that all heating has been lost across the city. Which, if you know anything about temperature and the fragile human body, is really fucking bad. Here RWBY actually did a good job of introducing Weiss’ comment early in the volume about how people can freeze to death within an hour or so. We were still left with a few detail-oriented questions like how useful aura is in combating that, why Ruby was still so cold with her, why no one was showing symptoms back during the walk to the farm... but at least the setup is clear here. Civilians don’t have aura so that’s that. They’re dead if they don’t find some way to keep warm (riot fires help...) or aren’t evacuated somewhere else. It’s a big deal, though how exactly this fits into the rest of Watts’ plan and the other bits of chaos he’s accomplished is still unclear. More on that in a bit.

We see Pietro and Maria, but they don’t actually do anything this episode. They just stand around looking scared as people get violent and the city is covered in ominous red lights. At least the show remembers that they exist, but we don’t get to see the brilliant scientist specializing in creating weaponry and the former Grimm Reaper doing something to help. So... B grade on that one?

There’s no time skip this episode so with Mantle unraveling we segue right back to the dinner at the Schnee’s. Ironwood is still getting called out for having too much power. He pushes back that there are checks and balances in place to keep everyone, including him, from abusing that power. This is countered with a broad and not very persuasive claim that they simply haven’t worked. Ironwood comes back with a line about intentions and the nameless (?) council guy goes, “What people intend and what people do are not always the same thing!” Well no shit. If that were the case everyone’s lives would be staggeringly easier. You intend to find the madman who dismantled your army at Beacon? Boom, done. Intend to find the murderer responsible for attacking Robyn’s supporters? Congratulations, you did it. RWBY now has a habit of throwing out lines to remind us that the evil men in power---notably Ozpin and Ironwood---might intend to do good, but look! They haven’t managed it! Which... yes? Sometimes intentions fail, but that leaves the unanswered question of what these characters (and the writing) want them to do instead. No one has the luxury of changing their situation and everyone continues to ignore the fact that there are only bad options all around. I’d rather have someone with good intentions at the helm than, you know, Jacques. It also speaks volumes that as much as the council and RWBYJNR has been criticizing Ironwood lately, everyone still expects him to make the hard call himself. They don’t want that responsibility; they want a scapegoat if and when things go wrong. Just like the group was happy to scream at Ozpin and then get pissed that he left, leaving them to make the hard decisions themselves for once, everyone is screaming at Ironwood and then two minutes later turn about with, “So what should we do, General? What’s your plan? How are you going to fix this?” Though I don’t think any of it is intentional, RWBY has a lot to say about how only good and lucky leaders get to come out of their role unscathed. No matter what you do someone hates you for it and even choosing to abstain isn’t an option, as we saw clearly with Ozpin.

At this point the meeting is briefly interrupted by a waiter who tells Jacques about the heating issue. He responds with a, “My authorization?” before trying to cover things up, awkwardly agreeing with the conversation he just missed. Robyn announces that she’s not done with Ironwood yet though and accuses him of more failures, ending with, “yet you won’t let your own council help you?” which... honestly? Just hammers home how not useful this “Ironwood should trust everyone!” mindset is. Because is Robyn really that dense? The council is Jacques and two of his lackeys. You know, the guy who is about to be arrested for treason and as an accomplice to murder. Even though that hasn’t been revealed yet, Robyn is very well aware of what a corrupt, dangerous individual he is. Remember that she herself is not the council. She was given a “seat at the table” because Jacques wanted to use her against Ironwood. Robyn is sitting here symbolically pointing to Jacques and the two members he has wrapped around his finger going, “Why aren’t you trusting them?” like that’s in any way a sound suggestion. Sometimes the answer to, “Why are you doing Bad Things like keeping secrets?” is “Because people can be unimaginably stupid.” This is an example of that. Robyn wants to know everything and right now she’s willing to risk that information falling into an enemy’s hands to get it.

(Also, that picture in the background? Says a lot that Jacques has a picture of him, his obedient son, and his terrified wife in the room where he conducts business. No Weiss or Winter in sight.)

Ironwood, of course, tells a straight out lie with an excellent poker face. “I’m not hiding anything.” Which inspires Robyn to use her semblance. Oh no! An insanely convenient ability that would undo every conflict we’ve set up for this season! However will we avoid this? Timing, obviously. Weiss, also conveniently, barges in right when Robyn has put Ironwood on the spot. I said it as soon as Robyn’s semblance was introduced: if you give someone that level of power---something that can too easily solve all the problems you’ve set up---then you have to keep coming up with semi-contrived ways of keeping them from using it.

Also, does she need skin-on-skin contact for her semblance to work? I wonder if that’s why she’s got that one random finger missing on her glove.

Wiess plays the recording of Watts and Jacques, giving us the rest of their conversation. We don’t learn anything new. Watts promised Jacques a seat on the council and he in turn (supposedly) would get the satisfaction of ruining Ironwood’s life. Jacques handed over his login information, including what he gained post-election, and now Watts has access to everything he built and then some. To say that’s bad is an understatement. You might be distracted from your worry though by hearing that cake line again as well as the men’s villainous laughs. RWBY really went full cartoon for that conversation.

A detail I really love though? Ironwood’s rhythmic footsteps as he walks around the table. Super ominous and intimidating. Meanwhile, a hilarious detail is how awkward Jacques gets when he’s finally lost that precious control. This isn’t a confident man capable of denying the accusations against him in anything like a persuasive manner. He doesn’t have Ironwood’s poker face. Jacques is a coward who looks like a schoolboy seated in the principal’s office once caught.

He attempts to escape only to find Weiss’ knight blocking the exit, the one we now know was the possessed armor that belonged to her grandfather. In a thoroughly satisfying moment she declares that Jacques is under arrest... and then turns around to ask Ironwood if she can actually do that. I’m on the fence about this. Normally I don’t mind a bit of humor lightening the mood, but in this case we have three things that I don’t think are improving the situation. The first is the sheer emotional impact that should be accompanying this arrest. This is Weiss’ abuser. The man we’ve known about (incidentally anyway) since Volume 1 and who has driven nearly the entirety of her character development from working to escape him pre-RWBY to coming back as a huntress. Provided that Jacques doesn’t pull a Torchwick and escape himself somehow, this is the culmination of nearly seven volumes worth of heartbreaking struggle. There are some things that I think should be allowed to shoulder their weight without undercutting it with a joke and this is 100% one of them. Just like finding out that a friend you thought had been permanently torn to pieces in front of you should generate heartfelt shock and joy, reaching the moment where you finally arrest one of the show’s biggest personal villains should be treated seriously. Let Weiss have this and put the joke later if you still want it. Weiss could be staring hollow-eyed at her father being put in handcuffs and Ruby could try to cheer her up. “So...” she says. “Can we arrest people?” Weiss blinks, coming out of her stupor, and gives a tentative smile. “Don’t know, actually. But it’s working in this case.” There. Serious moment leading to a bit of comedy-bonding. Humor is a wonderful tool, but it also lessens the other emotions of a scene if not used properly.

Potential issues #2 and #3 are smaller. On a personal note, hearing Weiss’ question simply reminded me, again, that RWBY has failed to establish hard rules for its world, including what a huntsmen’s job entails. A few weeks ago fans were arguing over whether Blake and Yang should feel anything in regards to killing Adam because, according to some, it’s already a part of a huntsmen’s responsibilities to arrest and if necessary kill people. Why would they flinch at something they knew they were signing up for? Others (myself included) pointed out that although we see the students sparing with one another at school, no one says anything about them taking out human and faunus criminals. RWBYJNR’s adventures---from Ruby stopping the robbery in her trailer to tracking down the White Fang---are presented as outliers. This is not the sort of stuff huntsmen are meant to get up to. They fight grimm first and foremost. Everything else is a case-by-case surprise. Note, for example, that Ironwood expects his army to keep the peace and presumably the police when things aren’t quite so dangerous. He’s not sending huntsmen out to track down everyday criminals because that’s not their job. Killing grimm is. Weiss’ comment reinforces that. Can I arrest someone? Is that within my power as a huntress? And Ironwood... doesn’t answer. Because it’s meant to be a joke, not a legitimate bit of world building.

And then the third... is just how Rooster Teeth is using humor throughout the entirety of this episode. AKA not well, which makes me less inclined to give this particular moment the benefit of the doubt. We’ll get to that in just a second though. For now I’ve written way to much on a two second scene.

While Jacques’ plans unravel the rioting in Mantle is getting worse and worse. “Atlas killed the heat on purpose! They’ll do anything to control us!” which is very much a conclusion born of panic. It feels like every other episode Mantle is on the verge of collapse and, by extension, all of these moments feel anti-climactic. We’ve watched Mantle rioting over the embargo, and then Penny, and then the election, and now the heat... none of it feels like it has weight anymore. Rioting is just the way we’re ending most episodes now. It also (again) raises that question of what exactly Watts is trying to accomplish, and not in a “Still to be revealed!” kind of way. We do still have an element of that, but at this point there’s also just a, “Literally what was the point?” aspect too. Why is Mantle rioting most episodes? Shouldn’t that be something to build to? More importantly---as I’ve said before---WHY did they frame Penny? We see in the next scene that Jacques’ guilt likewise reveals Penny’s innocence... even though everyone important knew that two seconds after she was accused. There were no consequences attached to blaming her and, as just established, we clearly didn’t need the loss of a city defender to bring that city to the brink. Mantle has been going over the edge for a variety of reasons and the people were at that point before the group even arrived. When Penny was first framed that seemed like a brilliant setup. Now we see definitively that it led nowhere. Why did Watts bother and why did the writers? It’s another case of RWBY chucking in things they think are “cool” without bothering to follow up on them.

So yeah. The Penny situation is done. We didn’t even get any development out of her from it. That really is disappointing.

With everything Jacques did on the table the situation looks bleaker by the minute. What can Watts do with this control? “With enough time… whatever he wants.” The group finds out that the first thing he did with this power is shut off the heat and Weiss has the most dramatic reaction, which makes sense given that she’s the one who best understands the risks here. And then... then.

Oh dear god.

Ironwood realizes that Watts may eventually have access to the Amity info, if he stumbles across it or actively goes looking for things to uncover. This revelation on its own is good. That’s something Ironwood needs to try and prevent, so it would have been an excellent moment of storytelling to show us Ironwood’s moment of revelation, perhaps with a bit of dramatic music to hammer things home. Except that instead of keeping this issue between the people who know about it---Ironwood and Ruby could have exchanged knowing glances like Blake and Yang did when they first started keeping their secrets---Rooster Teeth has Ironwood talk about loud to himself about the major secret he’s keeping. He literally calls it a secret! “No. The secret is safe for now. But if he learns about Amity…” Hello?? I understand that this episode is all about things coming to light, but that moment was an absolute insult to Ironwood’s character. We just saw this man claim with a perfectly straight face that he had nothing to hide. Five minutes later he’s apparently lost so much intelligence he stands in front of four people he’s keeping secrets from, including Jacques Schnee, and starts soliloquizing about said secrets. That is the most stupid and contrived way to get caught in a lie. Oh no! I totally forgot a bunch of people were standing beside me! Now everyone has heard that I’m keeping a secret since I felt the need to state that out loud...

And in case anyone thought this is a case where I’m reading too much into things, Robyn literally laughs and goes, “Yep! Still here, everyone!” Reminding them that someone who is not supposed to know about this stuff is standing... right there... listening in... The writing draws attention to it.

This trumps all other former stupidity. Like the group loudly announcing their attempts to avoid getting arrested in the city covered with surveillance. This is so stupid I want to turn it into a meme. Cleanse this scene somehow.

Anyway. More rioting. More anger. Shock, surprise, that draws a ton of grimm. Take note of the fact that Ironwood’s army is almost useless against this barrage. The missiles from the airships don’t seem to take the horde out. Nor do the guns. Two other soldiers are forced to cower when some pterodactyl-type grimm flies overhead.

I say this not to bash the army itself (they’re doing their best while up against horrible odds), but rather to re-emphasize how not good telling the whole world about Salem is. Everyone seems to forget that, first and foremost, this is the concern that Ozpin dealt with. Even if he was 100% wrong on every other count---no one would lose hope, no one would ever betray him---it is impossible to hear about Salem and not experience negative emotions and those negative emotions draw grimm that kill everyone. Ironwood’s primary justification was that he’ll use his army to protect the people when that happens and (ignoring that his army can’t possibly be everywhere at once) we see here that it’s all but useless. His soldiers may have been able to handle the grunt grimm seen at the breach and the Battle of Beacon, but they’re helpless in the face of anything stronger, the exact sort of stuff that world-wide panic over an immortal woman would draw. Clover makes it clear when he arrives that only huntsmen stand a real chance and huntsmen are few and far between nowadays. They lost an entire school. Lionheart made sure nearly all the huntsmen in Mistral were killed. They’ve reached a point where teens are given licenses at least two years early, without full training, because they need the help that badly. Ironwood cannot protect the people if their fear grows stronger. That’s not his fault, but it also means he can’t afford to deliberately stoke that fear. Telling the world about Salem, whether she’s immortal or not, is a 100% death wish for lots and lots and lots of people.

That’s why I can’t get behind an idealistic view of, “But they deserve to know.” Maybe they do, but if given the choice I’d rather keep people in the dark and let them live their lives than tell them for the sake of the moral high-ground and risk the very likely possibility that they’ll die a horrible, bloody death.

Then, finally... we come back to the group’s secrets.

As established, Robyn is calling Ironwood out on his own secret keeping because he just admitted aloud to having a secret. 100% dodged her suspicion by Weiss’ timely arrival and Jacques getting outed as a traitor, then went ahead and shot himself in the foot. Sorry. I just really can’t stress that enough. Anyway, she’s homing in like a bloodhound, backing him into another corner, and this is the animation they decide to give us.

This is why I haven’t liked the group since mid-Volume 5. Because they’ve become reckless, hypocritical, often incredibly cruel people. Animation is a drawing. Someone had to decide and design this moment. Nothing is left to chance. So Rooster Teeth made a conscious decision to have Ruby almost-smiling in this moment. Looking pleased and happy at the very least. She’s still keeping her own secrets and is taking pleasure in the fact that Ironwood’s are coming to light. This is the exactly the same behavior we saw with Ozpin and (to a lesser extent) Cordovin. The satisfaction this group derives from either seeing or handing out what they perceive as another’s just desserts while they themselves are committing the same or worse sins. Ruby should not look happy here in the same way that she should not have pushed for Ironwood to sacrifice Mantle in the name of finishing a doomed project. And as we’ll see in a moment, she shouldn’t be giggling with Oscar over the shared damage they’ve caused.

At this point everyone is ganging up on Ironwood. Yes, including Oscar. As a preface to all this, I love my farm boy. Just not how Rooster Teeth has been writing my farm boy. Because this is what I meant at the very start of this recap. Oscar and Ruby’s speeches here are only inspiring if you choose to ignore the fact that, in this moment, they’re still keeping their own secrets. I honestly thought Oscar was going to come clean when he approached Ironwood leaning against the wall. Instead he offers his advice which is, straight up, to just stop keeping secrets. Says the kid who is still keeping secrets. Oscar even goes so far as to say that “You already knew that wasn’t the right course” which is the biggest load of BS I’ve heard on this show so far. No! No one agreed that was the wrong path. You all explicitly decided that keeping secrets was the right thing to do. They’re telling him he was wrong to choose the thing they benefited from and continue to use to their advantage in this scene.“Tell the truth,” Oscar insists, still not telling the truth. “You’re not alone,” Ruby adds when she hasn’t trusted Ironwood once this season. This moment is manipulation because Oscar and Ruby both are trying to convince Ironwood to do something using false personas. Ironwood believes that he should listen to them precisely because he thinks they’ve achieved the very thing they’re demanding of him: sharing all their secrets. He thinks they’re models to look up to. When in fact Ironwood is the only one who has ever managed this demand by sharing his plan with them, completely of his own volition.

The fact that they decide to tell him a few minutes later doesn’t matter. They already got what they wanted and the damage is done. I mean that literally. By manipulating Ironwood into spilling the beans, they’ve created a situation where Ironwood revealed the Salem secret to the council and Robyn but not her immortality. Ironwood himself only learns of that afterward, back in the dining room, and you can see the utter devastation on his face.

Is it still a good idea to tell two highly suspect council members and a woman who has been his semi-enemy about Salem given that she can’t be killed? Who knows. We don’t get to tackle that question because Ironwood wasn’t given a choice. It’s too late. He was pressured and manipulated into a making a huge decision without all the necessary information (which, for the record, is still not the same thing as the group deciding to help people and do the job they signed up for without knowing about Salem). Even if nothing horrible results from these three people now knowing about Salem, Oscar and Ruby have created more problems. We hear the council woman ask fearfully whether Ironwood can defeat Salem. The only thing holding them together is the hope that they can still win with their army... but they can’t. What’s Ironwood going to do with that expectation now? Will he tell them about her immortality too? Risk what they might do in response? Don’t you think this is something he should have known about weeks ago, Ruby? “You should know before you make any… sacrifices” Oscar tells Ironwood, completely ignoring the fact that he already made sacrifices. Mantle was a sacrifice. Those resources were a sacrifice. Telling the council was a sacrifice. Ironwood’s ongoing hope that he could finally end this, stretched out far longer than it had to be, was a sacrifice.

What kills me is the casual nature of it all. There was no catalyst here. Nothing new happened to convince the group that they can suddenly trust Ironwood. If they’re willing to trust him now that means they trusted him before and just didn’t tell him because... they didn’t. The defense of “He’s unstable, who knows what he might do to them and Mantle once he finds out the truth!” was a smokescreen the whole time. Because nothing changed. Ironwood said and did nothing in the last fifteen minutes to suddenly cause the revelation of, “Oh my god. We can trust him. Now we finally know we’re safe to reveal this secret.” They could have done it on day two and avoided so much strife. Like, you know, the situation in Mantle that Nora felt the need to scream at Ironwood about. Maybe if you’d told him his plan was doomed he might not have taken so many resources from the people, given that he’d have known there was no longer a justification for that. You had the power to fix the problems you blamed him for from the get-go.

Combine this with Oscar and Ruby’s horrible conversation. Sure, the rosegarden shippers are thrilled, but beyond the fact that I’m personally not shipping Ruby with a boy housing her 1,000 year old headmaster, that (once again) was not the correct emotion to apply to this moment. They both come across as horrendously callous by laughing and giggling through the decision to finally tell Ironwood. It’s not like these secrets have driven this entire volume and are about to absolutely devastate him or anything. Why would you have a serious conversation about this? Why express even an ounce of sympathy and regret for what you’ve done? Nah, better to jump around and give each other thumbs up. Act so proud that you’ve randomly decided to come clean, like you deserve praise for this. Kids, am I right, Marrow?

Seriously. This is how these two treat the situation vs. what the situation actually is.

Which in a horrible way is fitting because there are zero consequences for all this. (Cue my shock...) Ironwood isn’t mad about any of this. He jokes with Oscar! “No more surprises, alright?” Given that RWBY releases weekly and thus there’s plenty of time between episodes, I feel like people forget the expectations they developed months back. The more optimistic side of the fandom (god bless you all, you’ve got more hope than me) keeps insisting that eventually the group’s new behavior will lead to repercussions, but time and time again Rooster Teeth tells us they won’t. Not for putting Argus in danger. Not for stealing an airship. Not for keeping the secrets Ozpin was crucified over a whole volume for. And that’s still going. Alongside Qrow’s talk with Ruby, Ironwood is given the space to blame Ozpin again---“Why? Why would Oz keep this from us?”---and has no desire to blame the group for doing the exact same thing. Oscar is allowed to go, “Sorry! We just didn’t trust you” but the same justification out of Ozpin’s mouth doesn’t fly, despite the fact that he had a hundred more reasons not to trust a bunch of teens. The level of hypocrisy in this episode is just staggering. We all watched Ruby tell Ozpin’s lies and went, “Oh yeah. This is going to come back to bite them” and it didn’t.

There is nothing the group can do to get in trouble, or even a reprimand for. Anything and everything is twisted to praise them:

Destroyed precious military equipment (which this episode’s attack shows that the world desperately needs) and nearly get people killed by attacking an ally? You get a free ride to Atlas.

Broke Atlas’ laws by stealing their property and then avoiding the police? You get hugs from your sister and early huntsmen licenses.

You tell the exact same lies you demonized your headmaster for? You’re so much better than he is and I’m so proud of you.

Keep secrets from Ironwood, making a horrible situation even worse? Haha no more surprises in the future please!

And yes, this also includes: Going behind everyone’s back to spill information to Robyn? No one will even find out you did that. I’ve seen a post going around with people expressing how pleased they are that Robyn didn’t rat Blake and Yang out. That’s the level of bias the fandom and the writers are working under. The group gets away with everything because they’re the protagonists. Everyone adores them unconditionally. At this point I think they could join with Salem and people would insist that it’s the smartest and most badass move they could possibly make. Fans and the writing would praise them for that too.

Ugh. Sorry for the level of salt in this recap. For the record I am glad that others are able to enjoy all of these moments. I just can’t. Oh boy I can’t.

Alright. Close to wrapping up now. A series of smaller things: Oscar has another moment where he draws on Ozpin’s memories of Atlas being built. “You say that like you were there---” Ironwood says. We’ve spent a lot of time theorizing about the merge but in light of this episode... are we really expecting an explanation? RWBY hasn’t adequately explained dust vs. magic, or Qrow’s semblance, or why we should be rooting for heroes who do everything their perceived opponents do. Why would we expect them to explain something as complicated as this merge either? I think we should just expect a continually wishy-washy situation that changes based on the whims of the plot.

Ren and Nora have a moment on the airship that sparks another charged look between Blake and Yang. Are we ever going to tackle the huge concerns Ren had a few episodes back before they were silenced with a kiss? Does he or anyone else know that Oscar spilled the beans? For that matter, did Oscar admit that there’s still a question left in the relic? Does Ironwood actually want to lock it up now like they should have from the start? Did he explain precisely why Ozpin ran off? These answers remain lost to the void.

Jaune looks like he’s going to be sick after the airship is attacked. Nice throwback to episode one.

Whitley is devastated by his father’s arrest, truly alone now. He slinks off with Willow watching him go. Hopefully with Jacques out of the way she and Weiss (and possibly Winter) can start helping him. Show him how to connect with others in ways besides cruelty.

The group then jumps out of the destroyed ship... but not before Elm and Harriet tease each other a bit. In a kind way. One might almost say... a friendly way...

Yeah these people aren’t friends. No way. What an absurd assumption. Will the show ever come back to that assertion, or will it remain another illogical way of insisting that the group is intrinsically better than everyone else they come into contact with? I’m betting on the latter.

Finally, we catch glimpses of a disguised Neo infiltrating the Schnee manor. After everyone leaves she returns to Cinder who says, “Oh, you’re back early. Tell me you’ve found what we’ve been looking for” and Neo gives an affirmative gesture. To which I respond with no emotion whatsoever because this episode has scorched me from the inside out.

1/10 with the 1 given because yay arresting Jacques. Everything else I’d happily put through a paper shredded. I’m gonna go cleanse my mind with more Witcher 3 now.

Until next week! Everyone start praying...

#rwby #rwby volume 7 #rwby volume 7 spoilers #rwby recaps #mymetas

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rafael-silva · 4 years

Text

My thoughts on how we can get McDanno by the end of s10

With ten seasons of Steve and Danny bickering and arguing like a married couple, and with all the comments and jokes about it from other characters throughout the years, at some point, it stopped being a running joke and became actual text.

And with the recent news that season ten is the final Hawaii Five-0 season, I think we might actually be getting McDanno in the series finale. However, maybe a little different than how we imagined it.

Steve’s radiation poisoning prognosis hasn’t been mentioned in ages, and those side effects the doctor said were going to happen down the line? I think they’re happening to Steve now.

He isn’t sleeping and he clearly doesn’t wanna talk about it when Danny brings it up in 10.19. I thought then, yeah, Steve doesn’t open up easily and he knows Danny is always there and he always goes to Danny when he’s ready. But still, there was this thing I couldn’t shake off about that scene. The episode continues, Steve and Danny bickering in a way that is so them throughout. It was actually quite nostalgic.

Fast forward to the final scene in the episode. Steve and Danny are riding downhill on the horses, Steve stops to admire the sunset and his next words quite literally send chills down my spine.

You know, I’ve always taken sunsets for granted. Probably because I figured I’d see a million more. Just cause you see something every day doesn’t make it any less special, huh. In fact, I think those are the things that you’re going to miss the most. In the end, you know.

I’m tearing up again. And I think deep down, Danny knows where Steve is going with that. Because his reaction to Steve’s words, the way he looked at Steve. And then he tries to lighten the mood by sparking another bickering session. And then Steve says, admit it, Danny, you’re gonna miss this when it’s done.

All of Steve’s words could be a nod for the fans since the show is ending, that we’re going to miss it when it’s finished. But I think there’s more to it. In other words, Steve is telling Danny, you’re going to miss me when I’m gone.

I don’t know why this was the first thing my mind jumped to but I have a gut feeling that Steve is sick. But he can’t bring himself to tell Danny. And I think Danny can’t bear to hear those words and that’s why he changes the subject. But deep down, I think Danny knows. I was half expecting Steve to turn around and be like, “Danno…it’s happening.”

Now, more under the cut about my theory of how we’re getting McDanno.

It’s sad, but hear me out. If Steve really is sick, he wouldn’t be able to continue leading Five-0, so the topic of retirement would come up. It’s been coming up quite a bit recently, but from Danny’s side. And we all know where one man goes, the other follows. Either both Steve and Danny retire together, or they don’t retire at all.

What if they do. They decide to retire. Steve lets Adam back into Five-0 and they throw a party for Steve and Danny. It’s also been said that the mystery of the Champ box will be solved by the end of the season, so maybe Steve also takes that as a sign to retire, of him finishing what was started. The show started with the Champ box, maybe it will end with it, too.

Next step: Junior moves in with Tani. And that leads to Danny officially moving in with Steve. If Steve is sick, Danny won’t let him out of his sight and he won’t let Steve live alone. Danny will always stick by Steve’s side.

Remember Danny’s hallucinations in 8.10? Tani and Junior being married and Tani leading the task force (which I can totally see and am on board with) and then old Steve and Danny sitting on Steve’s (it honestly felt more like their) beach side-by-side? What if this is what sets all that in motion.

Also, this may explain my confusion with 10.14 and the writers killing off Leslie, the woman of Danny’s dreams and what purpose that served. Maybe this is the purpose.

Steve and Danny sitting together by the beach could very well be the final scene in the series.

In a recent interview with Katrina Law, she teases a little about the finale and what she’s excited for fans to see and says, “I’m actually really excited for an entire sect of fans. It’s been breaking my heart listening to them all season online, asking for what they want and feeling like they’re never going to get it. They’re going to get it and I’m SO excited for them.”

Now, I can’t think of anything but McDanno when I read her answer. So yeah, in my perspective, the pieces of the puzzle are falling into place leading to McDanno, just not in the way we had imagined.

I’m also praying that Steve is okay.

If this is the case, and Steve is sick, I will choose to believe that he beat it and he grew old with Danny just like in Danny’s hallucinations.

And at the end, it’s Steve and Danny together. Always Steve and Danny.

Or maybe the show ends on a much happier note than what I predicted and we get McDanno in a happier way, too and everyone is healthy. Who knows. I’m just throwing my thoughts together on here.

#hawaii five 0 #mcdanno #steve mcgarrett #danny williams #hf0 #who knows

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thanksjro · 4 years

Text

Everyday Is Like Sunday: Everyone Hates Huffer

This is technically a Christmas story, modeled after A Christmas Carol, but I’m covering it now because time is an illusion, god has abandoned his creations to chaos, and I’m on the downswing of a depressive episode so nothing actually matters!

I’m kidding. It’s mainly because some of this stuff is very difficult to find, and trying to save this thing for a later date isn’t going to work with how the lineup’s currently looking. In that I don’t have anything prior to Roberts’ stint with IDW available to me at the moment that hasn’t already been gone over.

This isn’t even the only Christmassy story Roberts did back in the TMUK days- there’s a comic out there that he worked on with Jack Lawrence that’s meant to be another sort of holiday special starring Optimus Prime. He just really likes Christmas, I guess.

Anyway, let’s get into Everyday is Like Sunday!

Oof, that font. My inner graphic design nerd is screaming.

It’s the return of Matt Dallas! Dallas was the artist Roberts worked with for Liars, A-to-D, the prequel comic to Eugenesis. Having looked into the guy a bit since I covered that, I found that he was everywhere during the TMUK days, and even headed the Transtrip publications. His credits are impressive, to say the least.

Our story begins with Kup fighting Unicron.

Would you look at all that detail! Check out that six pack, dude’s ripped. It’s a good thing this is the only time we’ll see the Chaos Bringer, because that must have taken ages.

Yep, this Unicron is an illusion, and not even one that’s diegetic to the characters. Well, except Kup. Huffer, the resident stick-in-the-mud, glass-half-empty, complete-and-total grump, has taken it upon himself to mess around with Kup while he’s passed out in his easy chair after a few too many, because what the hell else his there to do on this starship? That cord in Huffer’s hand is plugged into the side of Sup’s head, so he’s just pouring this dream narrative straight into his brain. Hot Rod is, understandably, a little weirded out by this, and invites Huffer to instead enjoy the day, because it’s Christmas!

He does have a bit of a point- Christmas isn’t exactly a thing on Cybertron, and just because they have it on Earth, doesn’t mean it’s necessarily stuck with everyone as much as it has with you, Hot Rod. I doubt Huffer would care, even if it was a Cybertronian holiday.

If that last little line reads a bit oddly, that would be because it’s actually a song lyric that’s wormed its way into the dialogue. This comic is named after a song by Morrissey called- what else?- Everyday is Like Sunday. It’s a pretty good listen, I recommend you take a listen. It really matches the tone for Huffer’s whole situation.

The situation that is his personality.

Huffer’s in a mood. He’s always in a mood, but he’s particularly incensed now, because they’ve been scooting around in space for almost a year and haven’t actually done anything. Arcee listed off all the things they’ve accomplished, because she wants him to either lighten up or shut up, but he brushes all that off, because he can’t stand to be wrong, either. And then Bluestreak has to go and open his mouth, having the audacity to suggest that Huffer might actually have an emotion other than general displeasure and perhaps even- gasp!- MISS Earth.

This sets Huffer off, and he goes on a brief tirade on how he doesn’t give two hoots about the Earth. The only reason the tirade is brief is because Ebony decides that enough is enough and outright attacks him.

You probably don’t know Ebony, and that’s okay. From what I can gather, she’s someone’s OC. Not sure who, but she’s got to belong to someone. She looks like she turns either into a wolf or some sort of big cat, and she’s had enough of Huffer’s bad attitude. She says what everyone’s been thinking, and offers to kill him in a sort of roundabout way if life is really that fucking terrible.

Huffer decides he’s had enough, and asks where the escape pod is. This ship doesn’t have an escape pod, but Hot Rod offers to drop him off at the first planet they pass. Bumblebee suggests they just go ahead and let him off here. Everyone’s about had it with Huffer, and trust me when I say the feeling seems to be mutual. There’s literally an entire page devoted to him just insulting everyone and listing off all the reasons he can’t stand them.

Bluestreak looks genuinely offended, like he can’t believe Huffer would even go there.

Huffer fights dirty, too. He goes after things people have zero control over, like their age and how they’re built. Just flat-out rude. He attacks folks who aren’t even present, calling Prowl uptight and Nightbeat a lackey.

We cut over to the two of them having a discussion about the order of the shuttle they’re on, and how things are going to have to change, then it’s back to Huffer acting like a jackass.

You’re just saying that to be hurtful and ridiculous.

Huffer storms off into the darkened hallway, wishing a sarcastic Merry Christmas to everyone. The door shuts behind him, and then everything promptly explodes.

There’s a lot going on here, but let’s try to break this down a bit. We’ve got some full-stasis off in the corner, with Eric Cartman and He-Man’s Oracle featured as pieces, the vacuum from Teletubbies, what might be a porno mag in the lower right corner, and a TI-83 calculator. Damn, guess Huffer got what he wanted.

No, what’s really happened is that the shuttle’s been hit by an asteroid. Considering I haven’t seen anyone actually manning this rig, I suppose it was only a matter of time before they floated into something big enough to hurt. Prowl intercoms for everyone to head for the bridge and pull up the defense shielding.

Off in the hall, Huffer’s face down on the ground. He tries to get up, but the shuttle keeps hitting things, even with Bluestreak at the wheel now.

That’s what I want to know! Look at our detective, asking all the right questions! However, we don’t have time to answer that, because, unfortunately, Nightbeat isn’t our main character this go around.

Huffer is.

Our little bastard man is looking a bit crispy, but seems otherwise okay. He certainly isn’t feeling bad enough to not make a stink when someone has the utter gall to try and help him to his feet. His tune changes though, when he sees just who this kind samaritan is.

Fusion’s a dude who’s only claim to fame is biting it. I suppose that it’s fitting he be our Ghost of Christmas Time-Is-A-Perception-Based-Concept.

Fun little detail about Dallas’ work- he makes everyone outrageously shiny. These sons of guns have been at war for millions of years, and should probably be scuffed all to hell, but Dallas is just like “haha, nope! Break out the polish!” and everyone is glossy enough to apply lipstick with. It doesn’t even stop at characters; in Liars, A-to-D, Mirage fires a missile that you can see Sixshot’s reflection in as it flies towards him.

Fusion, when asked if he’s a hallucination, simply says that he’s as solid as Huffer, and when their hands touch, THIS happens:

Which I suppose means they’re embarking on a journey of the spiritual variety. That, or Huffer’s FINALLY proposing.

The pair materialize on Cybertron, 50,000 vorns in the past, which is well over 4 million years. A vorn is equal to 83 years, which is oddly specific if you ask me, but now you know! Huffer, of course, wants to know how all this nonsense is possible, and just what the hell Fusion’s deal is.

Huffer’s not one for mystical bullshit.

Being a bit short on time, Fusion has Huffer look through a window at a meeting with all the bigwigs. They’re discussing Huffer’s Ark designs, and just who exactly is going to man this thing once it’s ready. Emirate Xaaron suggests that Huffer come along, and strikes just the cutest little pose while he does.

Seriously, look at this, he’s precious, even with his funky grate mouth.

Nobody can mistake Huffer as being inexperienced or stupid, but the problem is nobody friggin’ likes him. Huffer, of course, takes issue with that, grumbling to himself and completely missing Fusion’s departure. When he finally takes notice, his new guide is already in place: Grimlock. The star wipe makes a return, and they’re off to the next scene.

Meanwhile, back on the shuttle, Bluestreak’s having some trouble with maneuvering around all these asteroids. Hopefully they’ll be okay until Huffer’s done with his Christmas special shenanigans.

Huffer and Grimlock arrive at Earthbase in the present day, in the middle of a rip-roaring good party.

Dammit, who let Cosmos into the booze? You know he can’t hold his liquor.

Everyone hates Huffer so fucking much, and I honestly can’t fault them for that. He’s kind of a festering wound of a person.

Grimlock disappears while Huffer’s busy watching everyone’s testament to their dislike for him. Huffer star-wipes out onto the next scene, interrupting him before he can say the fuck-word.

Back with Bluestreak, he’s nearly gotten them out of the asteroid field.

Huffer appears on what might be a moon, and meets his final guide.

Fuck, he’s become aware of the narrative! Shut the comic down, quick, before another Swearth happens!

Our ghost reveals himself to be Huffer, roughly 200 years in the future, and he’s looking ROUGH.

Oh no, he’s dehydrated.

Because he never learned to act like a decent person, the shuttle crew is going to dump him on a uninhabited moon in a couple weeks time, and then that’ll be it.

And then we get into the character study portion of the comic.

Huffer only bitches as much as he does because he’s self-conscious and doesn’t want to let people in, for fear that they’ll see what a useless hunk of junk he is.

Of course, current Huffer still can’t get over himself- even when it’s just he, himself, and him- and has to continue poking holes in this revelation, claiming it to be no more than a dream that’s presenting him with a fundamental personal truth in an easy-to-swallow pill.

These couple of panels are very dialogue-heavy, taking up a majority of the space available, but in the end, Huffer’s last little biting remark is that none of this is real and none of it matters, so just get it over with and send me back. Which Ghost-Huffer does.

Back at the shuttle, they’ve cleared the asteroid field, and it looks like it’ll be smooth sailing from here on. Huffer wakes up, in just a foul a mood as ever, as he stews over all the horrible things he heard about himself during his dreams. It looks like he’s about to return to status-quo, perhaps dooming himself to the fate of Ghost-Huffer, when he overhears Prowl chewing out the rest of the crew. Because no one had bothered to watch the radar, thus nearly killing everyone, he’s going to start tightening his belt and imposing some rules and regulations, as opposed to letting people do whatever they please. He names Nightbeat as his second-in-command, which everyone seems okay with (except Kup, for whatever reason).

Just something about this interaction Roberts really enjoys, I guess.

As part of this little crackdown, Prowl’s ordering a round-the-clock manning of the shuttle- half-day shifts. There’s quite a bit of groaning about this, but honestly? I’m not exactly sure how they’ve gotten away with not doing this for as long as they have.

Huffer, in a show of what I assume is the closest thing to kindness he’s performed in years, offers to take the first shift. Nobody fights him on that, and he takes a seat. In the background, Kup asks to have a word with Prowl.

Huffer decides that he ought to lighten up, just a touch, and maybe at least consider not being such a massive jerk.

That decision lasts roughly twenty seconds, and then he gets bored.

Personal growth is for suckers! IDW Whirl WISHES he was this disconnected from his own conscience.

As he runs off to go be a jackass elsewhere, the shuttle drifts back towards the asteroid field, surely dooming everyone aboard. The end!

This was a fun, somewhat bitter little story that tried its hand at picking apart a narrative that’s been run into the ground. Sorry, Roberts, but nobody’s gonna do it better than A Muppet’s Christmas Carol.

Up next, we’ll be looking at something a little different. Something not written by Roberts, but based on his work.

We’re going to read Eugenesis fanfiction.

#transformers #jro #everyday is like sunday #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #comic script writing

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yunoyeol · 5 years

Text

His ripped love

Genre : romance; smut later; streetracer!au; angst

Warnings : explicit use of drugs; swearing; illegalities; explicit smut

Pairing : you x kim hanbin

Chapters : 1 / 2

Chp. 2.

Hanbin.

BI.

Hanbin.

You enjoyed how the syllables sounded, how they left a spicy effect on the tip of your tongue and how nicely the letters rolled out of your mouth. Even when your eyes were glued to the book's written pages, your mind was absentmindedly somewhere else. You couldn't focus, the only image you managed to produce being of that Saturday night. Laughing, you leaned back against your chair and cursed at your own foolishness, finding yourself talking alone on your room, specially when it was possible that the man in question probably didn't even remember a glimpse of you.

But, boy, did you remembered him.

Actually, that's all you've been thinking about for the past two weeks.

You did your exam, and you thought it went good, but you recollected how surprised your were when in the middle of the test, your brain traveled to that scene once again. Your hands dug into your scalp, pushing the long hair strands back in frustration.

" - Enough. " You got up, practically shoving your feet into the slippers that rested nicely on the floor. Grabbing your phone from the desk, your fingers searched Lisa's contact rapidly. You knew that Jennie was unable, locked deeply in her room, probably with Bobby deeply inside her. Not that you mind, it was true that Jennie has been happier lately, and if she's okay with their arrangement, you were in no position to go against her felicity. You wondered how would that feel like.

Your steps guided you to the kitchen as you waited for Lisa's voice on the other line, which was heard soon after a few seconds.

" - Hello my favourite girl, at least you didn't ditch me for some dick like the other three have! " - Her voice was distinctly loud, and you could hear the was in a crowded place. " - I swear, some day they will decide to do a threesome, a sixsome actually, all they want is t- "

" - Hello Lisa, yes,- " You cut her off before she started rambling, chuckling at how whiney Lisa could be. " - i know. Where are you? "

" - Im at Midnight! That bar downtown where I'm usually at. " Her characteristic chuckle could be recognized even from afar. " - Come join me! "

" - I hope you're not alone, Lalisa. " Your voice sounded like a worried mother, scolding her irresponsible child.

Again, the laugh was made percieved. Lisa was probably around her fifth drink of the night, you judged as you grabbed your leather coat and your everyday sneakers. Now you had to go.

" I'm not, but come! I miss you. " Lisa mumbled the end of her sentence, making you roll your eyes and smile in tenderness.

" - I'm coming, give me 10 minutes. "

With that, you slid your finger on the screen and shut the call off, checking if your keys were on the jacket's pocket and your wallet still in your bag. With everything on order, you left the shared apartment, hitting the door with a loud bang to warn Jennie that she was alone now, and could moan as loud as her lungs desired.

×××

Downtown, 01:23 AM.

Finding a parking spot was difficult, and now you knew why. The bar was packed, smoke filling the atmosphere and the music quite obnoxiously loud. As soon as Lisa found you, she raised from her seat and waved, extending her fingers as high as they could. She was on a table with a familiar looking trio, the same blonde one that took the bag that time, a quieter guy that scrowled his phone down and him.

Him.

Hanbin was here.

The same man that didn't leave your brains and wrecked your rational mind everytime you tried to get some rest and peace.

Your throat went dry, and you suddenly thought that staying home and hear your roommate's pleasured screams wasn't actually a bad idea.

With a gulp, your feet lead you to the table they were in, an awkward smile resting on your nude lips.

" Hi. " Your voice came quiet, probably more quiet than it should, and you found yourself nervous at your own actions. Lisa laughed and swung her dainty arm over your shoulders.

" Guys, this is Y/N. This one is Yunhyeong, this punk here is Chanwoo, and that one over there is Hanbin. " Now you could associate the face with a name, Yunhyeong was the bag carrier, Chanwoo was unknown for you, and surely you already knew Hanbin's name.

" I know this lamb. " Hanbin pointed his indicator finger at you even if it lazily balanced a cigarette with his middle one. There was a glint of mischief on his smirk, and in the way his lids seemed to be fighting against it's own weight when they danced from your uneasy expression to the colour of your jeans.

" Lamb? Wait, wh- " You scoffed, a sudden chuckle following the question. But for your luck, Yunhyeong cut you mid sentence, saving your unnecessary embarrassment.

" She was with them two weeks ago, on our race, right? " He scrunched his eyes as if he was trying to figure it out himself.

" That's right! " Lisa answered and took her seat back, pulling you next to her. Sitting, your hands fell on your lap and glued to each other.

Hanbin nodded, taking a sip of his drink and setting the cup down again, a soft giggle vigorously leaking from his throat. It sounded like venom, but you'd likely get drunk on it. Chanwoo noticed how you stared, his eyebrow arching up and his irises moving to his friend.

" You guys know each other? " Chanwoo asked, locking his phone and leaving it on the wooden surface of the table.

" No. "

" Yes. "

Both of you answered in chorus, his affirmative answer making you slightly confused.

" I presented myself the other day, didn't I Y/N? "

And you could feel your feet shaking, effect of his perfect smirk that turned into a wide smile. The sound of your name leaving his mouth blanked your thoughts, and you swore his voice was your favourite melody from now on. Chanwoo seemed observant, glancing quietly between the two of you.

" Well, I'll go meet Daisy, so I'll be taking my leave. " Yunhyeong got up, drank the last sip of his beer and grabbed his wallet, waving at the rest of you.

You noticed by the corner of your eye how a familiar looking girl aproached the table once Yunhyeong's seat was empty, nicely next to Hanbin. You thought in getting up and moving there, but that kind of courage was stored in your deepest fantasies only. Instead of you, a girl with a heartwarming smile took his place.

" Hello, how are we today, huh? " Her voice was sweet, happy and she seemed to be in a great mood.

" Dahyun! Long time no see! " Lisa got up from her seat only to embrace the newcomer. You had a feeling you've seen her before. By the way she instantly circled your friend with her arms, you knew they were close somehow.

" Dahyun, from my history of arts classes. " Lisa looked at you as if she heard your thoughts, and now you knew why she was familiar.

Hanbin took a sip from his cup, his tingue grazing over his lower lip agonizingly slow. He seemed to be quieter now, deep in thoughts, only to interrupt himself and get up, grabbing his pack of cigarettes.

" I'm going outside for a smoke, I need fresh air. " Even you not knowing anything about this man, you knew that it was a awful excuse to take a step away from the table.

With that, you got up too. Stumbling on your words after grabbing to much attention, your shaking irises moved to Lisa that stared at you with a unknown expression.

" I remembered I have to finish my essay. I'll be leaving, it's late.

What an awful lie, Y/N. The only thing you wanted was a small conversation with Hanbin to leave you daydream for the mext two months.

Lisa watched you for a couple of seconds, before nodding with a small grin. She wasn't dumb, she knew how to read people.

Hanbin walked out of the scene, leaving the bar and leaning against the brick wall. You just followed his lazy steps outside, zipping your jacket up once the chilly night touches your neck and made you shiver.

The temperature, you supposed.

" You'll be leaving now? " Hanbin lightened a cigarette up, hanging it on his chapped lips.

Ah, stupid Y/N. How ridiculous was it, always finding beauty in places that you shouldn't be looking for. You dove into the idea of how excruciating painful it could be : hungrily searching for something that would spark you out of your mundane life, even if that interest was found in the shape of hostile man, that managed to catch all of your senses just by standing there, lightning a cigarette up.

" Yes. It’s late. How about you, are you always smoking? ‘‘ Your voice slightly trembled, but you blamed the weather, not the puddle of fire that agonized your stomach in ways you still had to decipher.

Hanbin just took a deep drag out of the death stick he now held between his fingers, inhaling the smoke with dull grace and exhaling a cloud of carbon dioxide mixed with nicotine. With his irises finding yours, his voice came out deep but clear enough to be heard even with the distance, the muffled music and the chuckle that leaked out of his throat between his words.

‘‘ Want to go for a ride? ‘‘

Without much thought, your head instantly nodded in a affirmative motion.

#kim hanbin #bi #hanbin #kim hanbin fanfic #hanbin fanfic #ikon fanfic #bi fanfic #street racer au #hanbin street racer au #au #street racer fanfic #bifanfic #hanbinfanfic #ikonfanfic #ikon fic #hanbin fic #ikon

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themattress · 4 years

Text

Rewatch: My Bride is a Mermaid Ep 12 - 13

Well, it finally happened. I finally liked the first episode much better than the second one.

Episode 12: Servant of Love

After a two-part debut as the antagonist and three episodes as a side character, Lunar Edomae becomes the primary focus of the story here, and it is glorious to behold. The amount of entertaining facial expressions that are put on this girl in this single episode is incredible, and Cherami Leigh is on point with her manic, hyperactive voice-acting.

We dive deeper into Lunar’s troubled psyche than we ever have before, as she reveals how she’s flunking in school because her busy idol schedule doesn’t leave her enough time to study. We also see her growing affection for Nagasumi that she vehemently denies since he’s a human that she’s supposed to look down upon, her anger and jealousy toward Sun for having so much that she continues to lack no matter how much of a celebrity she’s become, and her inner self-esteem problems that she masks with that haughty royal ego of her’s.

It all comes to a head when Nagasumi is caught by Papa Edomae drying off Lunar’s legs, which he mistakes for something else entirely and is ready to kill Nagasumi until Lunar intervenes and claims that she loves him, which Papa Edomae declares means that the two must be married at once. Nagasumi is horrified, Sun is devastated, Gozaburo is ecstatic, and Lunar is conflicted as she maintains the lie in order to score a “victory” over Sun at last.

This all seems rather serious, but the mood is lightened by a hilarious cameo by Kai and Chimp that just rubs salt in poor Nagasumi’s wounds. He just can’t ever catch a break! :P

Episode 13: Love Story

Did not care for this one. Why? Because the manga actually did it better.

We still get some great moments: Lunar and Maki’s hypocritical “No, you!” argument, Lunar pouring her heart and soul out to Nagasumi in desperation, the reconciliation between Lunar and her father, one of Sun’s most badass moments ever as she crashes the wedding and cuts down gangsters left and right to reach the alter, and the impending yakuza war being transformed into an impromptu dance party thanks to a duet between Sun and Lunar.

But aside from that, there are too many glaring problems here for me. Because it’s episode 13 and thus had the potential to be the last episode to be aired on network television if the show didn’t do well enough, it’s got this “fauxnale” vibe where things are really intense and melodramatic, and the show has not earned that at this point like it will when the actual series finale comes around. And as such, there is too much fixation on Sun and Nagasumi as the main characters, but in the manga the primary focus remained on Lunar. The anime started adapting this story correctly in the previous episode, so shifting gears like this is jarring.

And then there’s the worst part: the nature of the specific things that were cut and altered in regards to Lunar. Is polyphobia a thing? Because this anime is being incredibly polyphobic.

- In the manga, when Lunar is torn between gloating to Sun about having Nagasumi for herself and feeling guilty about it because she knows it’s based on a lie, she still manages to hold Sun and stroke the back of her head comfortingly. In the anime, she just stands there.

- In the manga, Lunar’s anger at Sun crashing the wedding is very clearly shown to mainly stem from concern for Sun’s life, whereas in the anime these lines are absent and she is just angry because Sun’s actions risk causing a new war between the Seto and Edomae Gangs.

- In the manga, there is immediate pay-off for Papa Edomae telling Lunar that she must be honest with herself, as when she thinks back on this she realizes that her honest feelings are love for Nagasumi and Sun equally, and that she just wants to be together forever with them. This whole epiphany is cut from the anime, so it makes it seem like she only loves Nagasumi.

- In the manga, Sun apologize to Lunar for “all the times she mistreated her”. Of course, in reality Sun didn’t ever mistreat Lunar and Lunar recognizes that now, so seeing Sun give such a sincere apology purely out of consideration for her feelings touches Lunar greatly. (It also seems to exasperate her, as she seems ready to say “Sun, you are such an idiot!” :P)

- And in the manga, the ending of the story is when Papa Edomae asks Lunar if she wants to re-start the wedding, she refuses because - as she had just come to recognize - she only wants to continue the life she already shares with Nagasumi and Sun where the three of them live together. Nagasumi and Sun can be married to each other and Lunar will be perfectly content as the third wheel in a polyamorous threesome. And to show this, she lays herself down between the sleeping Sun and the unconscious Nagsumi, smiling while looking at Sun and saying she’s accepted Nagasumi as “a part of us” (”us” = her and Sun; the implication being that she and Sun were a romantic pair first and that she’s more than happy for the two of them to share feelings for Nagasumi just as they share feelings for each other.)

^ Yes, it does look wonderful. But the anime cuts it out completely, and changes it so that when Papa Edomae asks his question of Lunar, she looks at the sleeping Sun and Nagasumi and then declines, with her subsequent line now being “Besides, eventually he’ll be mine”. So now it’s an “I Want My Beloved To Be Happy” moment, with Lunar also holding onto the hope that Nagasumi will choose her over Sun of his own accord in the end. How heteronormative. Not only do we not get Lunar cuddling up to Sun and Nagasumi, she’s missing from the last scene of the episode, which is a tacked-on scene with special fauxnale credits rolling over it. And I must repeat: in the manga this whole story arc was Lunar’s, she was its protagonist.

Even the Next Episode preview with Nagasumi’s rapid-fire narration pissed me off this time around, as he starts it with a joke of “well, that closes the book on My Bride is a Mermaid” and then ends it with meowing. No real reason other than a cat being involved in the next episode’s story; he just meows. Yeah, now I’m wishing Papa Edomae landed that punch.

#My Bride is a Mermaid #Opinion #Analysis

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elliedoes · 6 years

Text

Everlong - Chapter Three

Dean x Reader x Sam

The world has gone to shit. You’ve got the undead trying to eat your flesh, a whining teenager to look after, and a few secrets that you need to keep. The Winchesters are the last thing you need, but the only thing you want.

Story warnings: Mild descriptions of violence, adult language, drug and alcohol use, polyamorous relationship (no wincest), smut, angst, fluff.

Note: I meant to get this chapter out yesterday, but things came up. It is shorter than the last two, but it's pretty much filler.

I would like to thank everyone, again, who's taking their time to read this. And extra special thanks to those leaving kudos and comments. I would really appreciate any and all feedback, it's a fuel that keeps the fire burning.Thank you. <3

Series Masterlist - Masterlist

“It’s still alive,” Dean moved closer to the undead hanging from a crooked cross. “Well, undead alive.” As he neared, the zombie writhed in place, bony fingers wiggling and jaw snapping. The thing was starved, its bones visible underneath its rotting flesh.

Sam narrowed his eyes at the nails holding the zed into place, “This was a message.” The pair circled the rooted cross and were able to lay it flat.

You hadn’t moved since you spotted it, you couldn’t. Every muscle in your body froze as you watched the brothers examine the body and the cross, your quiet warning did nothing to alert them that something was wrong. You tried to speak, but even your vocal cords seized.

“Y/N,” Dean called out to you, “can you look for a crowbar or something?” They were nose deep in their investigating that it took them nearly a full minute to realize that you hadn’t moved. “Y/N,” Dean repeated, finally looking up to see you still in shock. “Hey, are you okay?”

They abandoned the body for the moment, rushing to your side. Sam was the first to reach you, taking your shoulders and trying to get your dazed expression to focus on him. “Hey,” he said gently, dipping down to get eye to eye. Your attention turned fully on him and he offered you a half smile, “There you are.”

“No,” you shook your head as you found your voice and stepped out of his reach, “we need to go.”

“Woah,” Dean stomped over to you and stopped your attempt to get away, “what’s going on? You know who did this?”

You looked briefly at the cross on the ground, a visible shiver ran through you, “Not exactly. I’ll explain when we get out of here.” Dean stopped you once more when you turned to head back into the house, his hand wrapped around your arm, but you jerked it free. “I’ll tell you,” you repeated through clenched teeth, “but we need to get going.”

The brothers shared a worried look between themselves but followed you into the house. You were a whirlwind, forcing Trevor to get dressed and packed, terse in your words and trying to not to look panicked for the boy. You gave him ten minutes to dress and be at the front door before you disappeared into the master bedroom to gather your stuff.

“Y/N,” Dean tried again, not reaching out to stop you, but his voice was wary, “sweetheart, you need to stop and take a breath. Tell us what this is all about.”

You did as he instructed, stopping in the threshold of the bathroom. “Matt and I were with a group when this first started,” you told them, looking pointedly over you shoulder to their packs, silently telling them to get their stuff together. “He and I shared a difference in a opinion and we parted.”

“So, you’ve got this Matt guy and these assholes after you,” Dean tried to suss out and moved with you into the bathroom, packing everything unceremoniously.

“Not exactly,” you scrubbed your hands over your face. “The group we split off from was found just like that thing out there a few miles out of Atlanta. They were lined up along the highway, just hanging there.” Your mind flashed through the scene, you and Matt passing by, trying to shield Trevor’s eyes from the gore. The thought that it could’ve been you up there ghosted through your mind. “We saw more when we got closer to the city, but…” You swallowed thickly and tried not to throw up last night’s dinner.

“But,” Sam gently encouraged from the doorway.

“But they were alive,” you finished, looking up at Sam, the threat of tears stinging in your eyes.

Sam’s face soured and he looked between you and Dean then in the vague direction of where the cross laid outside. “So, you’re saying…”

“I don’t want to think about it,” you snapped and a full body shiver ran through you. “Can we just get out of here?”

“Yeah,” Dean said softly, tossing toiletry packs to Sam and moved over to you. He reached out cautiously and then pulled you into a tight hug when you didn’t fight him. “It’s gonna be alright,” he whispered in your ear. You relaxed in his hold, but only for a moment.

“Y/N,” Trevor called out.

Dean pressed a kiss to your forehead before he pulled away, joining Sam in the bedroom to gather their packs. You took a few moments for yourself before following them, grabbing your bag from Sam as you passed through the room and to the front door. “You keep close to Sam and Dean, alright? Whatever happens, you stay with one of them,” you told Trevor. He stared up you, confused, but he nodded.

When the brothers joined you, Dean took point, Sam at the rear. The boys were on alert, their shoulders tense and heads on a shivle. The zombie on the cross was left behind, but not forgotten. “What about breakfast,” Trevor asked as you traveled out of the neighborhood and towards the highway.

“There’s jerky in my pack.” You stepped in front so he could look through it, “We’re on a tight schedule, don’t want to get caught in the rain.” You were lying. Trevor knew you were lying. He searched through your pack anyway, pulling out a package and shared it with the rest of you when he had his fill.

Dean took you all to the main road, forgoing the plan to scavenge through the gas stations on the way. The open view was ideal for avoiding an ambush, but it left you all vulnerable to what might be lurking in the trees, but it was a risk that you all were willing to take.

The Georgia humidity ate through you like you were marshmallow fluff. The thin shirt you had on was clinging to your skin, your jeans rubbing uncomfortably against your legs. The boys weren’t fairing much better, Sam’s hair was soaked and clinging to his sweat slicked face and Dean’s skin was flushed red. But poor Trevor was on the brink of whining, his face twisted uncomfortably as he tried to keep his discomfort quiet.

“Your bunker doesn’t have a pool, does it,” you asked, breaking the silence.

“Not that we found yet,” Dean said over his shoulder.

“Is it that big of a place,” you snorted. “A pool’s kind of hard to miss.”

“Yeah, actually, it is,” Sam replied. “But we really haven’t had the time to go through every door. It took us months to realize we had a garage.” You’re not sure whether you should be impressed or worried about the brothers’ lack of observational skills.

“Trevor can have his own room, though,” Dean added. “And if the power’s still going, we might even have air conditioning.”

You groaned longingly at the idea, “Yes. I’d sell my soul of some AC again.”

“It’s dangerous to say stuff like that,” Sam poked your shoulder. “People have actually sold their soul of less. Demons might take you seriously.” You somehow knew he wasn’t kidding, so you made a mental note to never joke about your soul.

Your question seemed to lighten the mood and Trevor fell back to Sam, starting his questioning once more. Thankfully it was nothing supernatural related, more on history and nothing you wanted to listen to, at least right now, so you found yourself next to Dean, wary of the treeline.

“How you holdin’ up,” he asked, voice low.

“I feel like we’re being followed,” you answered honestly. “I’ve got that prickly feeling on the back of my neck, like all the hair’s standing up.” He nodded knowingly, taking a moment to survey their surroundings. “And if they found us in the middle of fucking nowhere, it means we’ve got a tail.”

From the look on Dean’s face, he knew it, too. “So, what in the hell do they want?”

“Who knows,” you frowned, “but I really don’t want to find out.” Dean hummed in agreement and the pair of you fall silent, getting lost in the conversation going on behind you. While Sam’s tone was as light as it ever was, the set of his shoulders made it seem like he was worried, but all of that had been lost on Trevor.

When the sun was at its highest, Dean decided that it was time for a small break and lunch. He lead out off the road and into the woods, the three of you making a perimeter around Trevor. Several yards in you came across a clearing, Dean taking it upon himself to secure the surroundings while you set up and cooked the meal, and thanks to Sam, Trevor was still oblivious to all of your worries.

The last thing you wanted in the heat was soup, but it was the first thing you pulled out and you weren’t in the mood to be picky. No one else seemed to mind it, either, or if they did, they were wise enough to keep their mouth shut because the set of your face looked like you were close to ripping someone apart.

Your rest was short lived, though, just long enough to eat and rest your feet before Dean was collecting everyone to keep going.

The heat of the day was harsh on everyone, Trevor’s enthusiasm waned as he trekked on. Your tightly formed group had spread, the body heat radiating off of others was too much. Every move you made was uncomfortable, the fabric of your clothes rubbed you the wrong way, the flies buzzing around you made you want to punch an infant. You hated your life and you half prayed for a walker to jump out and rip into you so it could all end.

“Jasper, 15 miles,” Trevor read aloud. “There is a god.”

“We’ve got another few hours to walk, kid,” Dean grunted, shifting his pack, “don’t get too excited. And God’s a dick, FYI.” Normally, you would’ve laughed and made some sarcastic comment, but you didn’t want to move any part of your body that you didn’t have to.

Every step you made sent another annoyed shiver down your spine, every puff Sam made had your skin crawling, and every snap of a twig in the woods to your far sides made your jaw tick. “Okay,” you stopped in your tracks, rolling your shoulders and twisting your neck so it popped. “I need to punch something or I’m going to scream.”

“Y/N,” Sam tried to soothe, “we’ve got a couple more hours, you’ll be able sit down and relax then.”

“I’ll punch you,” you turned to him with a frown your face.

“If it’ll make you feel better,” he shrugged, shifting his weight so he could take any hit you sent his way.

You rolled your eyes and shrugged off your pack, wiggling your limbs and letting out a loud, frustrated groan. “I’m hot and gross and just want all of this to be over,” you whined like spoiled child with the three of them watching you impatiently.

“Are you done,” Dean sighed.

“Yes,” you nodded and gathered your things, scowl set on your face. The brothers continued on, but Trevor stayed behind to make sure you were all settled. “Sorry,” you apologized with a heavy exhale.

Trevor shook his head, “Sometimes we all gotta cry like a baby, it’s fine.” He obviously meant it all in jest, but you narrowed your eyes and swatted at his arm with a growl. The two of you were so caught up in your banter that you didn’t notice Dean and Sam stop. You ran into the back of Dean and you opened your mouth to object to his halt, but then you saw why.

The largest blockade you’ve ever seen in person ran from one edge of the forest’s edge to the other, the entire road cut off by a makeshift wall of plywood and mismatched metal sheets. In the center was a gate that was guarded by two watchtowers, an armed man in each. “Stop right there,” one shouted down to you.

“Yeah,” Dean shouted back, “already are. Look, we don’t wanna cause any trouble, just need to pass through to get to our car.”

The men trained their guns on the four you, “Can’t nobody enter without a toll.”

“And what is it, exactly,” Sam asked, stepping in front of Trevor.

“Whatcha got,” the one in the blue baseball cap laughed.

“Just food, clothes,” Sam replied. “You can have whatever you want, we just need to get through.”

The men laughed harder, the assault rifles shaking in grip, “You’ve got something better than that.” You wouldn’t even need to waste a guess to know what they were talking about.

Dean’s face hardened and he closed ranks with his brother, the pair shielding you and Trevor. “Like I said, buddy, we don’t want any trouble. We’ll give you our food, a couple tanks a gas and be on our way.”

One of the men laughed harder and climbed down the ladder from his tower. He sauntered over to the four of you, rifle slung behind his back and walked straight into Dean’s face, sizing him up. Even though Dean had a few good inches in height, the stranger was broader and slung his weight around. “If you wanna get through, how ‘bout you turn your head away for a few minutes and let us have what we want,” he grinned, looking right passed Dean and straight to you.

“Yeah, not gonna happen,” Sam squared up to his full height, looming over the guy with a murderous look on his face.

“Look, friend,” the guy laughed, “it ain’t nothin’, alright? Just a little fun and you’ll be on your way. Looks like she can take it, can’t you, sweetheart?”

Dean huffed and stepped into the man’s space, the safety clicking off of the other watchman’s gun, but shoots were yet to be fired. “Don’t you dare talk to her again,” he growl, voice venomous, “or you and me are going to have a real problem. How about you go back to whatever backwater pit you came from and let us go about our business?”

“‘Friad I can’t do that,” the guy smiled, “a toll’s a toll.”

What happened next was in the blink of an eye. Sam’s hand went to his waistband, the shot ringing in the air less than a second later and the bullets pierced through Blue Cap’s chest. Trevor crying out from the echo, hiding into your chest.

Dean had gotten the perv on the ground and was beating the poor guy’s face in.

You had yourself wrapped around Trevor, shielding him from sight and covered his ears with your hands. You could hear the sound of skin on skin and painful groans. It was Sam that eventually got it to stop, pulling his brother off of the guy. “It’s over, Dean,” he grunted, wrestling with the older man until he relented and got up.

“Don’t look, alright,” you quietly told Trevor and the teen nodded, turning around and sorting through his pack for a book. He was a teenager in a world gone crazy, he could handle it, but that didn’t mean you wanted him to. Killing a zombie was one thing, but another human being? He didn’t need that blood on his hands.

The guard was groaning on the ground, holding his surely broken nose, blood splattered everywhere. You thought for a second to help him, at least to reset his nose, but his words still rang in your ears and you thought the better of it and went to Dean.

“Let me look at it,” you insisted as he flexed his hand. He was still pumping with adrenaline, pacing when you got to him. It took him a few seconds to register what you were saying before he stopped in front of you, holding out his hand. You lightly brushed over his fingers and knuckles, feeling for anything out of place. “You’ll be fine,” you determined and kissed the blood knuckle. “Can’t say the same for him.”

Dean nodded stiffly and moved over to the guard to relieve him of his gun and anything else on him while you checked on Sam. “Are you alright,” you frowned as you caught him staring off into the woods.

He blinked and looked down at you, a tight smile on his face. “I’ll be fine,” he answered, but his voice was strained.

“You just shot someone, Sam,” you said quietly, eyes darting quickly over to Trevor and luckily the boy was caught up in his book.

“I’ll be okay, just…” You cut him off, reaching up to take his face in your hands to force him to look at you. Quiet stares were exchanged until he nodded, nuzzling slightly in your touch. “We need to keep going, there might be more of these guys around.”

Dean seemed to think the same and called Trevor over to help him open the gate while Sam climbed up to take whatever the other gatekeeper had on him. You should have felt guilty for looting a dead man, but it was what the world had come to.

With two new assault rifles and a spare bit of ammo, you continued on your way along the highway as the day wore on, the sun slowly setting. According to Dean, you wouldn’t make it to the car until after sundown and there was vote to whether you all should keep pushing or make camp when dusk started to hit.

Trevor didn’t like the idea of roaming around in the dark trying to find a car, but you all were far from any exits and there were no homes in sight of you. It was either camp in the dark or head for the car and at least have something cover you in the night. He eventually conceded and you all continued your way to the town of Jasper when twilight was just beginning.

“She was here,” Dean gasped, looking up and down the crossroads with not a car in sight, especially his. “There were tons of them, all lined up, out of gas, doors opened. They were here.” He looked to Sam who seemed to be just as in shock as he was. “Son of bitch!”

Defeated, Trevor dropped down in the middle of the road and crossed his legs. Like everyone, he was hot and tired and he just wanted to go to sleep. “So now what,” he grumbled.

“We’re going to find her,” Dean declared. “We’re going to find her and I’m going to kill whoever took her. It’ll be a slow, painful death.”

“Calm down,” Sam sighed, scratching at his jaw, “there were tons of cars here, it couldn’t have been just one person. But uh… where are all the zombies? We haven’t seen one for miles.” You lifted a brow in thought as you realized that he was right.

But you soon got your answers when a Humvee pulled up, lights shining across the four of you, catching you all like deer. “This is Sergeant Carlos Castillo,” came the voice over the speaker, “put your hands up where I can see them.” Trevor immediately popped up from his spot on the ground, arms held up high, with you and the brothers following suit. “We are with the United States Special Forces from Camp Merrill. We can provide you food and shelter, but we will need to check for any injuries and all weapons will be surrendered.”

Dean looked to Sam and they both looked to you. You shook your head. “Sorry,” the eldest called out, “we’re good on our own, just looking for our car.”

“This isn’t an option,” Sergeant Castillo replied. “Our orders are to find survivors and bring them back to camp.” You could hear a conversation being exchanged in the background and the sergeant continued. “Miss, will you please step forward?” You didn’t. “Ma’am, I’m going to ask you one more time, politely. Please step forward and identify yourself.” You could hear the echoing of the safety clicking off a gun.

With a heavy sigh, you stepped forward with your hands in the air. “Y/F/N Y/L/N, Sergeant First Class,” you shouted out.

There was rustling over the speaker and you heard familiar voice ring out, “Y/N/N?”

You dropped your arms and squinted into the light, “Becks?”

“Shoot her,” she said and your world went white.

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