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#ligur in the middle of reading going 'oh THAT'S WHY WE WANT TO LICK THE WALLS IT'S FOR HYDRATION YOU GUYS'
gayforgoodomens
·
3 years
Text
you guys think people in hell just don't like crowley because he's a friggin snake and they're all his natural preys
#crowley entering a room in hell and hastur and ligur jump on the highest shelf they can find
#eric just freezes in the middle of the room like a rabbit in headlights
#it always takes them a few seconds to remember It's Just Crowley
#and the only risk they run is to be bored to death by an excel presentation
#beelzebub is the only one immune
#they already beat hastur and ligur half to death when they tried to tongue-attack them
#snakes probably don't even know flies exist
#the first few days in hell must have been so confusing.
#5800 years later they get their hands on an animal kingdom encyclopedia
#and read everything they have on pests (since every animal in hell is a pest by humans' standard)
#very embarassed by what they find
#because they had no clue why they did the things they did for the past millenia
#a bunch of demons dig a hole and don't come out for months bc they just found out their chin rubbing was them seducing their buddies
#ligur in the middle of reading going 'oh THAT'S WHY WE WANT TO LICK THE WALLS IT'S FOR HYDRATION YOU GUYS'
#'WE NEED TO DIG A SWAMP IN THERE'
#'YOU GUYS'
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