The LAYERS needed in a modern/human Dreamling au. Some level of Endless family dysfunction, obviously. Hob's family can be be dead or not, it's all good. Are they old enough to have individually gained the awareness they are off-puttingly intense and should hide it a bit at first, or still in that "no, why would I need to Elsa this" stage?
Option A is both of them trying to play it cool, like "don't scare him off" except they so badly want to go from zero to sixty.
(Death and Desire have ruthlessly drilled Dream with flashcards about how to react appropriately in situations.
Desire: it's your one-month anniversary, what do you do?
Dream: [hesitantly] NOT propose?
Desire and Death, conferring, because that's technically correct but the delivery was suspect.
Death, encouragingly: Good start. And?
Dream: a nice dinner and maybe a walk?
Desire: well done!
Death: and for a three-month anniversary?
Dream: give them a key to my flat.
Desire: [airhorn] NO. RED CARD.)
Option B makes them the classic anecdotal "my grandparents got engaged within seven days of meeting each other and still are happy together".
(Death, rubbing her temples: so you met this guy--
Dream: Hob
Death: -- Hob, and within 1 day you gave notice to the Registrar's Office and figured out the best day to get married. And Hob agreed to this?
Dream: NO.
Death: oh thank go-
Dream: Hob SUGGESTED this.
Death: . . .
Dream: are you going to be a witness or not?
Death, 29 days later in the Registrar's Office, to Hob's witness: Is he sane?
Johanna Constantine, drinking heavily from a large flask: unfortunately yes, by all legal definitions.
Death: fuck
Johanna: [passing the flask over] if your brother's even a tenth as intense as Hob, they'll be fine. Probably.
Death, brightening: Is Hob that bad?
Johanna: You know how sometimes you meet somebody and think "oof, they're a bit much, best give them a wide berth"?
Death: yeah.
Johanna: Hob's like a camouflaged hole in the ground of muchness. Except he's done the hole up all nice and he knows that sometimes you just want to be left alone in the hole to sulk and rattle the spikes for a bit, and occasionally get a F&M hamper tossed in.
Death: [hmmmmmmm'ing approvingly]
Johanna, morose: the bastard.
In the background, Hob and Dream are pressing their foreheads together and basking in each other's presence)
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AO3 is back up but I’m still writing Nimona headcanons
I feel like the main trio are all really bad at taking care of themselves
Nimona can go a long time without eating drinking or sleeping so it's really easy for her to fall into a pattern of not taking care of herself until she’s sluggish and snappy
At first it was really hard for the boys to distinguish her food withdrawals from her normal chaos
When they do figure it out they make sure she eats and drinks at least once a day even if it small
It took a minute for her to adapt to this because she views taking care of herself as a hobby
But after a while she realizes that they’re just looking out for her so she goes along with it
Every once and a while Bal gets hyper-fixated on certain projects which causes him to forget to eat and sleep
Nimona once asked Ambrosius why he doesn’t do anything to stop these habits to which he responded “Oh believe me Nim I’ve tried it’s better to just let him get it out of his system”
Nimona still didn’t understand this and tried to force Bal to get up and take care of himself
Which just ended with Nimona being on the other side of a verbal thrashing and then quickly shoved out of Bal’s workspace
Ambrosius didn’t even bat an eye
Just walked around Nimona into the room with some food and water and then quickly left him alone
After that Nimona started to leave Bal snacks and pillows in his workshop when he eventually crashed
(And occasionally carrying him to his room when Ambrosius was too tired to carry him)
Bal also forgets to charge his arm
So it’s not uncommon for his arm to die and stay locked in that position
One time Ambrosius walked into the kitchen to find Bal hunched in an awkward position over his coffee and he didn’t flinch
Just gave him a straw and a kiss on his head before he left for work
Another time Nimona walked into the living room to find them cuddled on the couch
And they start their normal rant of “Ew gross get a room”
To which Ambrosius replied “I would if I could Nim”
She was quietly informed that Bal fell asleep and his arm died shortly after and Ambrosius has been stuck like this for hours waiting for Bal to wake up
Nimona laughed so hard they almost woke Bal up
They started storing chargers all around the house after that
So I have a headcanon that I kind of hinted at in my other post
But I’m fully convinced that Ambrosius' shoulder is fucked after the movie (he also has scars because I said so)
Because no way in hell can this man take a blast like that to his shoulder and walk away perfectly fine
Nah that man will be doing PT exercises for the rest of his life
And this dork forgets to do his exercises until he’s literally on the floor writhing in pain
Bal has tried just about everything to get him to remember
He’ll leave notes around the house, he’ll remind him before he leaves for work, writing it into his workout routine
Nimona told him “Boss you’re being too soft” and quickly switched tactics
Now you might be wondering what method Nimona used and that's simple he started blackmailing Ambrosius
Nimona started to warn Ambrosius “If you don’t do your exercises I’ll tell boss what happened to the last slice of cake” or “I’ll release the video of you singing at the top of your lungs while cleaning the house”
And the stupid thing is it worked
Ambrosius always says shit like “I should have left you in that box on the side of the road” to which Nimona responds with “Nah you’d miss me too much”
He also had a bad habit of getting sucked into little projects like trying to rebuild the city and fixing all the brainwashing that's been going on since the institute was created
You know small tasks for one person
And this dork will stay locked in his office until Nimona and Bal drag his overdramatic ass out
He always makes a big deal about it too screaming shit like “Oh please help me the heroes of the realm are kidnapping me an innocent bystander while I was simply doing my job!”
I feel like Bal and Ambrosius have a lot of nicknames for Nimona “Nim” is the most common
“Hun” and “kid” are used a couple of times but not nearly as often as the weird ones
Like “tornado” “tsunami” “hurricane” and “forest fire”
And if we're getting really sappy “starlight”
Now if you're wondering where this one came from I’ll tell you
When Bal and Ambrosius were little beans Bal called Ambrosius “sunshine”
It was supposed to be ironic but after that he started calling Bal “moonbeam”
And Ambrosius jokes that Nimona completes their little astronomy shtick
She pretended to be grossed out and lets Bal hug her and Bal and Ambrosius pretended not to notice the tears on Bals shirt
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