#like adora dies at the heart but come back as a ghost and only Catra can see her

[waybrights]

ive been trying to nap for the last 20 minutes but the only thing in my brain is a ghost adora au,,,

#like adora dies at the heart but come back as a ghost and only Catra can see her??? #that's the good stuff #and its lighthearted but also angsty... #yeah<3 #my aus #marie.txt #adora spop

[nonbinarychaoticstupid]

do 41 for catradora

ghost/living person au

behold! another thing i banged out and didn’t edit! kjjdnjjhdn this was fun! i decided to call it hello, my old heart after this song because i am cruel

(also... i think after i write the sequel bc i can’t just leave it like that i might expand this at some point or maybe write multiple versions? i like this a lot jejtnjrtnrnnm)

Adora doesn’t remember most of her childhood. Or much after that, really.

Everything up to the age of 18 is a... haze. Memories of life, of friends, of her identity, are either buried so deep she has to struggle to find them, or gone entirely. Faces, names, places, all gone somewhere she can’t follow.

It’s a given at this point, another piece of the debris of a life her carers left her with. She can’t fix it, and she can function without knowing her neighbour’s favourite colour, so why does it matter? It doesn’t hinder her too much, nor does it really make an impact on her functionality. It does annoy her, though, for reasons she can’t really explain.

There are things left behind in the fog of memory she... needs. Things that might explain this hole in heart, this deadening sense of loss that seems to follow her everywhere now. Things that might make everything make sense again.

Specifically, there’s... a memory of the traces of a memory. Someone Adora hurt, or someone who hurt Adora, or maybe both. And the girl who walked by her side for the first 18 years of her life, the girl who vanished at the drop of a hat, the girl she didn’t allow herself to grieve for. 

She knows how important the girl was to her. And missing her, dreaming about her without knowing why, hurts more than the loss. There’s something... something between them she has to fix. And it might hold the key to everything.

If she could remember, if she could find those shattered memories and piece them back together, she might remember why they took her past from her, and why Catra vanished. Why Catra died.

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She doesn’t know exactly why she came here, to the shell of the abandoned home on the hillside. Maybe because it holds her last memory of a memory of Catra, alive and standing in front of her, laughing as she turns to push the door open. Maybe because it’s where she feels her memories... return, in whatever capacity they are able to,

It’s darker than she remembers it. The hole in the roof has since been covered with tarpaulin and framed with a web of crumbling scaffolding, leaving dark, angular shadows climbing the walls and forming ominous shapes on the floor. Adora couldn’t begin to try and decipher the patterns there if she tried.

If she focuses, she can trace the paths they left in the dust together as kids, winding around battered marble columns and up the staircases and back down again, like trails in the snow. 

Like... 

Adora pushes back the tears. Why am I crying? What is it about this place that-

Oh.

A memory. Of... her.

“You’re trying to remember me, aren’t you? Stars, I’m so sorry, Adora.”  

If she focuses, she can remember the first day they came here together, a pair of awkward 14 year olds with too much energy and too little time, and hid in the shadow of the stairs on the left, waiting for the night to pass. The details are blurred together, half-buried under a white haze, but if Adora tries, maybe she can -

She can’t. 

“You can. If you want, you can. What they did to you - it isn’t permanent. You can break out of it if you try. It’ll hurt, but you can. I did.”

She shakes the - the memory (a memory, nothing else - something she’ll have to sit and examine later) off. 

Adora picks her way across the floor, careful not to disturb the spiderweb of shadows. It feels... familiar, instinctual. Something more than muscle memory. Almost... almost like she’s being guided by the past she can’t reach.

There are memories here. Adora can feel them in the back of her mind, pushing her gently forwards, urging her on. 

She makes her way into the centre of the main hall of the building - it was a mansion once, she realises - and tries to picture it as it was before - well-lit, grand, beautiful. She tries to see it how Catra would have (because she knows how much she loved this place, even if she doesn’t remember it), filled with stars and candles. 

Adora switches off the torch and stretches out her hands, as though feeling her way forward, except there’s nothing to touch but air. And it feels... heavy. Like she’s being watched.

Except there’s no-one here. She’s alone. 

I’m alone. I’m alone... right?

“No.”

A growing feeling of terror rises, unbidden, in her chest, and she whirls around, brandishing the torch in front of her like some sort of sword, doing her best to  clamp down on the cry building in her throat.

Nobody. Nobody’s there. 

“I am. I’m right here. Adora, I’m right here -”

Adora lets her shoulders drop. She feels... defeated, for some reason. Empty. 

But the feeling doesn’t go away. And she can’t leave until something happens. She can’t leave until - until she gets her answers.

“What answers do you want, princess?” 

Okay, the voice was definitely real that time.

Adora spins around again, nearly dropping the torch, and - there she is. Or rather, a memory of her - a girl no older than seven, with a tangle of dark hair and vivid heterochromatic eyes, her outline flickering and fading and - 

She reaches out to touch her - and is met with empty air. The girl meets her eyes, and something in them looks so desperate that it makes her breath catch in her lungs, and then she just - vanishes. Melts into nothing. 

She almost cries out. Almost fucking sobs. Because she was right there, all the answers could have been within her reach, and she just watched the girl she almost remembers melt into dust- 

“Not her,” the voice tells her gently. “She’s not real. She used to be, but she isn’t now.” 

Adora shakes her head and doesn’t answer. 

“There are more of them here. Memories. Kinda.” 

“What happened to her?” Adora whispers. They’re the first words she’s spoken in a while, and her voice sounds disjointed and out of place, echoing over and over down the hallways.

Something settles on her shoulder (at least, she thinks it does). “She’s... a fragment. That’s the only way I can think of describing it.” A laugh, one she... recognises. “I think they’re all part of the memories they took from you. They’re shadows. I’m the only real one. Well, real-ish.”

“What do you mean?” 

“Turn around.” 

Her limbs don’t want to co-operate. Because I’m afraid of what I might see.

It takes a monumental effort to get to herself to rise, turn inch by inch, raise her eyes past the cracked floorboards. It takes even more to comprehend what she’s seeing.

“Hey, Adora.”

Catra. It’s - Catra.

Catra - but not. Not quite the girl she watched disappear from her memories three years ago. Her eyes are slightly hollower, her hair is shorter, and she’s... dead.

Very obviously dead, too. It’s not like Adora could miss a stab wound in the front of her shirt.

But... but she’s there, she’s standing right in front of her, wearing an infuriatingly familiar half-smile, and she wants to cry - 

“Ca... Catra?”

Her smile widens. “That’s me.”

“You’re here,” she whispers, and it comes out as more of a sob. She’s here she’s here she’s here she’s here - 

“You’re here,” Catra - Catra -  echoes, beaming. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.” 

And Adora can’t do anything except let out a small sobbing noise in response. 

“Do you... remember?” she asks softly, hesitantly, hands toying with the fraying hem of her shirt. 

Adora shakes her head. “Not... much. I remember knowing you.”

Catra nods carefully. Her form has this odd translucent quality to it; she wonders if touching it would cause her to flicker like a hologram and vanish, only to re-materialise again in another place. “That’s something,” she offers. “Better than I’d hoped for, to be honest.” 

Her eyes fix on the torch in Adora’s hand, then flick back up. “I’d put that away if I were you. Light kind of... uh, dispels ghosts. That’s what I am. A ghost.” A smile. “I think.”

Adora stuffs it into her pocket without registering the movement. “H-how -”

“How do ghosts work?” Catra guesses. “Not sure. How am I a ghost? Again, not sure.” She shrugs, as though brushing it off. “It’s been... a long time.”

“I missed you,” she says, in a much smaller voice than she expected. “I missed you so much. I missed - I missed knowing you. I-” 

Catra smiles, and the movement causes her face to flicker at the edges, like static. “I missed you too. A lot.”

Adora bites back a sob. “Wha- What happened to you? How did you- ?” She shakes her head, shrugs. “Long story.”

There’s a long moment of silence. Adora catches herself staring at the outline of her form, the trails of half-shadows it leaves on the floorboards. In the half-light, she could almost be real. Alive.

She’s dead. She’s dead. It would hurt less if it wasn’t so clearly her fault.

“And - what about you?” Catra asks, breaking into her thoughts (which is a relief). There’s genuine concern in her eyes, she realises. 

She really cares about me. I must’ve cared about her, too - I do care about her. I just - why?

“I... also a long story. I think you know most of it already.” She huffs a laugh, blinking back tears. “More than me, at least.”

Catra nods again, slowly. Her eyes flick up and down, taking everything in like she’s seeing it for the first time. And some sort of realisation crosses them, then fades away as quickly as it came. 

“Do you want to... come back?” she asks. 

“Come back?”

“Come back. To the house. I could... I could show you what happened. If you want. It’s getting late, and Glimmer’ll be worried about you.”

Despite herself, Adora almost laughs. “You’re worried about me getting in trouble with my roommate for coming home late?”

Catra grins. “I’ve interacted with Sparkles before. She’ll be pissed, trust me.”

Adora smiles too, and for a moment, it could almost be - before again. Before her memories cut off and leave her with a white wall of nothing. Before Catra died.

“I don’t know if I can,” she says softly. “I might be... I might be dreaming, or you’ll be gone when I come back, or -”

“Trust me, I’m not going anywhere,” Catra cuts in. “I kind of can’t.”

She sits down on the floor and crosses her legs, a clear request for Adora to join her. “It’d be easier if I show you now, but I don’t want to make you pass out and have to figure out how to cart your ass back home.”

“Show me what?” Adora breathes. This is it. This is it. I might be able to... to fix things. Finally.

“What happened to me. And what happened to you. It’s a long story, like I said.” She smiles at her, a little sadly, and presses her palms flat against the floorboards as she sits down. Adora wonders vacantly if she can feel it, if her hands are passing through the wood right now, if she’s solid or just a... a ghost.

If she’s really gone.

Thinking about it fills her with an even deeper sense of loss, somehow. She can’t shake the feeling that it’s her fault, even if she knows that’s not true. And it hurts.

For a moment, they sit facing each other under the shattered skylight, and it could almost be - a memory she can’t quite reach. It could almost be just them again, like she knows they were.

“Are you sure you’ll be able handle this now?”

She nods. Once.

Catra gives her a small, sad smile. Her eyes are transparent, filled with guilt and an emotion she can’t quite place.

The room starts to fill with a soft blue light. It creeps up through the floorboards, making the shadows stand upright and wheel towards the fractured ceiling, making Catra seem to glow from within. Adora has to force herself not to stare (then wonders why).

Smoke tendrils begin curling up through the floor beneath them, wrapping around their legs. She swallows her panic in time to see Catra lift her hands from the wood, leaving scorch marks in their wake, and glance encouragingly up at her. It’s... comforting. Familiar.

“Try to relax, okay?”

Adora nods again. “Okay,” she whispers. It’s all she can manage.

The smoke curls up around her torso and expands, filling the entire room with a blue haze. She narrows her eyes against the strengthening glow, closes them entirely - and opens them again when the door swings open and nearly flies off its hinges.

Before she can move, before she can do anything but cry out, Catra’s hands - Catra’s solid, real hands - clamp as gently as possible down on her shoulders. “It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s not real,” she whispers. “They can’t hurt us again.”

“Again?”

She turns to meet Catra’s eyes, and for the first time since they saw each other, she looks... serious.

“Again.”

And two kids come running through the door.

Adora almost gasps again, because... because it’s her. Her and Catra, covered in mud and soaking wet and shivering, hair in disarray, eyes filled with sheer terror.

As soon as Catra skids in, past Adora slams the door shut, hinges screaming in protest. She watches it happen as though underwater. It feels... it feels familiar. That fear in their eyes - it’s real, and she remembers it. Except she doesn’t.

“Are you okay?”

Past Catra nods, clutching her wrist to her chest. “I’m fine. Are they gone?”

“I don’t think so.” Past Adora jogs over to her and helps her to her feet, smiling faintly. Despite everything, despite the wound at her temple and the blood caked on the hem of her shirt, despite the rain and the terror in her eyes, she’s smiling.

And Adora... remembers.

She remembers everything at once, a hail of flashing images and thoughts and words and feelings. She remembers emotions she didn’t even know she had experienced - burning, horrific grief, loss, missing her so badly she wants to scream at the sky and quite literally burst into flame, choking on sobs in bed - sheer, unending terror, pushed deep down into the centre of her chest, the need to protect, protect her, keep her safe, because she can’t be scared if Catra is - 

Someone is calling her name.

Someone is... Catra is calling for her, holding her against her chest as she trembles, whispering her name over and over again in her ear. 

“Adora, Adora - “

And Past Catra... Past Catra is bent over on the wood, coughing and crying her name, letting out choking sobs, a hand pressed over the wound in the centre of her chest. The door has been blown open again, letting in the wind and the rain, and Past Adora is gone.

“I’m-” She sits up, which is much more of a struggle than it should be. “I’m here. What happened?”

Catra gives her a concerned look. “You- passed out, I think. I mean, I know I said you would, but I didn’t expect.... this.” 

Her voice has begun to distort again, fading into a soft, static hum. The vision, or whatever it was, has begun to flicker and die into nothing, the threads fraying and unravelling until all that’s left is the girl bleeding out in the middle of the room.

Adora detaches herself from Catra’s fading grip as carefully as possible. Because, fuck, the things she remembers-

“You didn’t see half of that, did you?”

She shakes her head. “I didn’t.”

Catra’s face falls slightly. Adora can’t even imagine what the experience was like for her, having to relive her death again for the sake of her memory. 

“But I did...” She clears her throat, rests a hand inches away from Catra’s. “I did remember. Everything.”

Her eyes light up from within, something that has nothing to do with the faded blue glow sinking back through the floorboards. “You did?”

Adora nods. The movement makes her head spin. She remembers... everything. Especially falling in love with the girl sitting opposite her, watching her with wide eyes. Especially the - the magic they tried to wield on her to make her forget, to make her immune to loving. And the way she tried to escape, to take Catra with her to keep her out of their reach, and it backfired in the worst way possible. She remembers her memories being stolen from her one by one, sucking the grief out of her until there was nothing left. 

Most importantly, she remembers waking up in her bed and feeling for the space where Catra should have been the day after they told her she was dead.

“I did,” she whispers. 

Silence stretches out between them, and Adora wonders if they could possibly be thinking about the same thing. 

Without saying anything, without thinking twice, she blurts, “I love you.” 

Catra’s eyes widen.

“We never said that. When you were alive. I always regretted that. I wanted to tell you, and I never got to, and I’m sorry for that. But, stars, Catra, I love you. I love you.”

She’s staring at her like she’s never seen her before, like she did the night - the night they kissed for the first time, the night she can remember with almost perfect clarity now, the night that was hidden from her for so long - 

“Adora -”

“I know it’s been - wow, it’s been years - and I know so much has changed, but I just - I have to tell you that. I have to -”

And Catra laughs. Softly. Her hand comes down and through Adora’s, leaving a wave of - of warmth in its wake, and settles against her palm, and it feels so close to getting to hold her again she swears she could cry again.

“I love you too, idiot.”

#sep texxt #ask #blondhairedgoblin #writing #writing ask #she ra #spop #adora #catra #catradora #tw death #tw death mention #tw gore #tw blood #ask to tag #SHES OUT :D #sep's writing

[parts-of-spop]

Where Catra lets Adora fall in the First Ones Temple... and she doesn’t come out...

A fic segment (possibly tbc) where when Catra let Adora fall in the Temple, Adora just... doesn’t come out (for a while)... Featuring: Angst, more angst and even more angst.

Content Warnings: Suicide attempt and ideation. Like a lot because Catra is in a very dark place so please be careful reading this if this is something that may trigger/upset you. DO NOT READ OTHERWISE PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES.

Bye, Adora… I really am going to miss you…

I’m going to miss you.

I miss you.

She jerks awake with a frantic gasp, bathed in sweat then scrubs her eyes viciously of the images burned into the back of her eyelids.

Catra, no!

She tugs on her ears, scrunching them so tight it’s uncomfortable as that desperate cry rings through her head.

She did it… She actually did it.

“I killed Adora…” She whispers and there’s no one around to see her break.

So, she does. She chokes on sobs and curls up tight and small in her bed.

She never thought the fall would actually kill her. She’d been so sure that the temple wouldn’t let her die inside it. It was just-… She was trying to prove something but now she can’t even remember what it was.

I killed Adora.

I murdered my best friend.

And she curls in even tighter, fingers fisted in her hair tight enough to cut into her own palms as she thinks of Sparkles’ stupid enraged face the next time they had clashed.

“What? No She-ra today? Did she get a cold?” She purrs cockily, smirking just to mock her.

And Glimmer gives her a glare so dark she nearly falters.

“Adora’s gone… Happy, Force Captain?”

Gone?

“What? Did she get bored of you or something?”

She’d been so clueless at the time because she has never even comprehended a world where Adora didn’t exist. A world like that didn’t seem possible.

It was always going to be Adora… right to the end of the world.

Then Catra’s world ends.

“No, she’s dead! She went to her temple and never came out!”

It’d stunned Catra enough to throw off the entire fight and they’d had to retreat. Muscle memory kept her moving, giving orders… but she felt numb and lifeless.

She’d felt like a ghost.

Adora is gone. Adora is gone. Adora is gone.

Then she’d got to her quarters, sat on her bed and cracked.

“I... killed Adora…”

She never came out of the temple so that must mean she-… She died.

Catra had made her fall and she’d killed her.

Was it quick? Did it hurt? Did she lie alone and scared for hours or days?

Please at least let it have been quick…

She gasps and heaves through her tears and feels an overwhelming urge to claw into her own chest and tear out the agonising pain resting there.

You always had my heart, Adora… And now it’s as dead as you are… And nothing matters.

A memory comes unbidden and she wants nothing more than to rip it from herself too.

“You look out for me and I look out for you. Nothing really bad can happen as long as we have each other,” Her best friend says, smile warm and eyes bright even in the gloom.

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

She sobs harder, shaking from the force of it.

She was meant to look out for her.

She broke their promise too.

“What’ve I done?” She wheezes brokenly.

I killed her… I killed the best thing in the world…

I don’t want to be in it anymore.

I don’t want to live if Adora isn’t.

- - - - - - - - - - -

She’s halfway to stepping off the edge of their spot when someone snags the collar of her top and roughly yanks her backwards.

Fuck.

“Catra, what the hell-?!”

Lonnie of all people.

Lonnie, who has her hands fisted in the fabric of her top and is staring into her eyes, her shocked confusion twisting into shocked horror.

“Catra, what… What’s going on? What were you doing?” She presses though it’s clear she knows.

What does it matter? Nothing matters. Her entire reason for living has gone and it’s her fault and she’s never going to get that back.

“S’my fault…” She mumbles.

“What is?” Lonnie presses fiercely, still holding onto her like she’s worried she’ll throw herself off the edge again.

It’s smart because she would, audience or not. 

She’s always been selfish.

Catra blinks back at the girl she grew up with and realises she’s crying again.

“… Adora… I killed her, Lon’…” She chokes out and Lonnie blinks in confusion.

“What?” She whispers and Catra hopes this’ll be enough to convince her to let her go. Let her jump and fall like Adora did. Poetic justice…

“In the Temple I went to… She was hanging off a ledge… She begged me to help her…”

That hurts too. That Adora still had faith in her and she’d killed her with it.

“But I let her fall…” Catra rasps, hanging almost limp and if not for Lonnie’s grip, she’d probably be on her knees right now. Or scrambling off that ledge to her death. One or the other, she isn’t sure.

Lonnie is staring at her in disbelief.

“You… let her fall?” She breathes like she can’t understand.

“… I didn’t think it’d kill her. I didn’t realise how far she’d fall… but she never came out…” Catra explains and her next breath hitches, another crack through her chest and she huffs a broken laugh. “I did it, Lon’! I killed She-ra!” She declares before another sob rips the slightly manic smile off her face, “And I’ve never hated anything more…”

Lonnie’s eyes flicker over her face then dart to the ledge.

It was our spot. It seemed right to join you from here. We always shared this space.

“Let go of me…” Catra rasps and Lonnie glares at her.

“… No.”

No? She can’t say no, that’s not part of the plan.

“I can’t live like this. You have to let go of me,” Catra argues, growing frantic and she finds the strength to struggle but Lonnie, pitifully easily, wrangles her arms around her, pinning them to her sides and lifting her off her feet. She’s weak. She hasn’t eaten or slept in days.

“I’m not letting you throw yourself off that edge,” Lonnie growls, voice firm and determined and then she’s carrying Catra away from her chance of freedom, ignoring her thrashing and hoarse yelling.

“Lonnie! Fucking let me go!”

She is ignored.

“LONNIE!”

 - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - 

Catra isn’t sure how much time passes, only that some things change.

Entrapta starts working with Hordak on a portal device of some sort. She doesn’t care what it does.

By then, she’s already handed her Force Captain badge off to Lonnie.

She doesn’t care about the war. She doesn’t care about status. She doesn’t care about much of anything at all really.

She’s numb and empty.

She misses Adora more with every breath.

She eats mechanically, on rota with the rest of the squad because, and if this isn’t the most annoying thing in the world, she’s on suicide watch.

She’s never left alone, not long enough to escape and it’s like there’s always someone covering every available exit.

And since she gave up her post, she doesn’t even have her own room.

She goes back to the once shared bunk and slides under the blanket.

She wishes she hadn’t torn up their old blue one.

It might just have smelled like her a little.

Instead, she rolls onto her left side and reaches up a hand to trace over the drawing still nestled there. Her fingers rest on Adora’s doodled face, the pads in her fingertips catching lightly on the claw marks she made in the metal.

Her eyes burn and her tears fall silently but she’s sure the squad hears her faint sniffle.

It’s confirmed a moment later.

“It’s gonna be okay, Catra…” Kyle, of all people, has the guts to say.

She doesn’t reply. Both because she doesn’t know how and because if she tried she’d choke on the words.

No… Nothing is ever going to be okay again.

And they can’t watch her forever.

Days pass in a blur.

Get up, breakfast, training, lunch, more training, shower, bed.

Rinse repeat.

Over and over.

It turns into weeks because apparently her squad are more diligent than she’d realised.

She still cries herself to sleep at night but no one says anything.

They go out on skirmishes occasionally but Catra keeps away from princesses and focusses on Rebel reinforcements. Her heart isn’t in this but when has it ever been?

Her heart is dead and broken and still somehow manages to keep bleeding.

The Horde makes no progress but they don’t regress either. It’s a stalemate.

It doesn’t matter. Hordak is too busy having a blast with his lab partner.

Entrapta grieves for Adora too though.

Catra still doesn’t know how to admit it was her fault.

Then the months trickle by and the pain almost begins to feel like an old friend.

Nearly nine months go by and something changes.

This latest mission is to acquire some sort of tech to let them into the First Ones Temple- Catra flinches- and acquire the Sword of Protection- she flinches again- for Hordak’s portal.

Catra doesn’t like this mission at all.

#angst #cw suicide #no one dies but still #catradora #spop au #adora is alive btw #I made my fave suffer cuz I'm a depressed bitch #hoorah

[flowersandskeletons526]

“Broken Noses and Bad Ideas” - Glitradora Modern Au, Part 2

Part two is up! This chapter is pretty Adora-centric. Enjoy!

Part 1

----

Adora set the barbell on the rack and mopped the sweat off her face. Wiping down the bench, she put her towel around her neck and headed for the showers. After she toweled off and got dressed, she grabbed her backpack and left the gym. Classes were done for the day and practice wasn’t set to start for another two weeks. She had nothing but time. 

A strong hand grabbed her shoulder. “Heading out, Blondie?” 

Adora smiled at the muscle bound woman standing beside her. “Oh, hey Huntara. Yeah, I just finished my sets.” 

“Ready for tryouts soon?”

“You know it.” 

“That’s my star!” Huntara clapped Adora on the back. “Get where you’re going.” 

“See you tomorrow, Coach.” 

Adora popped by her dorm room to drop off her backpack. Half the room was covered wall to wall in plants, ivies creeping up the wall and across the top of the windows. Perfuma stood by her desk, gingerly tending to a stout cactus, her brows drawn together as she squinted at the plant. 

“Hey Perfuma,” Adora said. “How’s the cactus going?” 

Perfuma grinned as a tense laugh escaped her. “I always say to find peace through patience,” she said. “And this… does require patience.” 

“How hard can a cactus be? You water it like once a week, right? I would think your orchids would be a lot harder.” 

“They are temperamental, but we’re working on it.” 

“Good luck. I’m heading out, I’ll be back later.” 

“Tell Glimmer I say hi.”

“How do you know I’m going to see Glimmer?” 

“Where do you go besides Glimmer’s place?” 

Adora’s face grew hot. “I go places.”

Perfuma giggled. “Okay, Adora. Make sure you have your key because I’m going to Mermista’s tonight.” 

“Got it. Bye!” 

Adora strolled through the city, smiling as the sun beamed on her face. Spring was just beginning to set in, the snow finally gone and trees beginning to bud with green. She hated the snow. It was like a weight lifted off her shoulders just to see some sunlight and greenery again. The winters were so much colder in this city, but she could stand it when it meant having people like Bow and Glimmer with her. 

She had her own key to the shop after working there for the past few years. Stepping inside, the first thing she did was smile and nod at Angella’s portrait. The woman intimidated her in the beginning, when Glimmer dragged her by the hand to the front counter and introduced them, but it didn’t last long. Just in her time through high school, Angella had shown her more kindness than anyone had her entire life. The sting of her loss was still as sharp as anything, but Adora put on a brave face for Glimmer. Anything for Glimmer. 

Adora put herself to work cleaning every shelf and item in the shop. You never quite got rid of the dust in an old building like Brightmoon Magics, especially when Glimmer couldn’t clean the shop everyday by herself. Ever since Angella, Adora came in on most of her days off just to do whatever hadn’t been done when the shop was open. It became a habit when Glimmer first dropped out of college to focus on the business. 

Adora had a picture of them together in her wallet, grinning on a beach during the summer after graduation. Glimmer had her arms around Adora’s waist and was cuddled up to her side. She was carefree and passionate back then, with a fiery drive to fix the world and rebel against anything holding her back, even her mother. Adora still saw sparks of it in her eyes, but it was dampened and quiet and only ever directed towards fights. 

It was hard not to worry about her now.

It was impossible not to when she came home with her face smeared with blood. Adora frowned as she watched Glimmer clean her face off, doing her best to not fuss and failing. 

“God, Adora, calm down. You know I never lose a fight. Besides, they barely hit me.”

“Glimmer.” 

“What?”

“I know you’re lying.” 

Glimmer looked exhausted when she turned back to Adora. It made her heart ache. She held Glimmer on the couch and tried her best to provide her some comfort, trying to bring back that little spark of life no matter how useless it seemed. God, she worried about her. 

She held Glimmer tight before she left for the night. “Text us if you need us, okay?” she said. 

“Okay,” Glimmer mumbled. 

Although Adora hoped Glimmer would reach out, she didn’t think she knew how. 

Adora and Bow headed back towards the campus together, hands in their pockets and huddled against the chilly breeze. Bow sighed and glanced up at the starry sky. 

“I’m worried about her,” he said.

“I am, too,” Adora replied. “I don’t know how to help her. It’s been a year since Angella died and she seems worse than ever.”

“What can we do? We tried getting her to talk to someone and she quit after one session.” 

“Have you been going in more to help with the shop?”

“When I can. It’s hard to get down there for extra shifts with school and practice.” 

“I know. I don’t know what I’m going to do once the season starts.” 

“Do you think we should try getting her to a counselor again?”

“We’re talking about Glimmer, right? If she doesn’t want to do something then there’s no way we can convince her.” 

“Yeah, you’re right,” Bow sighed. “Maybe we could get her to take a few days off work. Even with us, she practically runs the store by herself.” 

“Maybe we can take her to Mystacor Beach once the weather warms up,” Adora suggested.

“Do you really think that going to see Castaspella will lower Glimmer’s stress?” 

“Okay, never mind.” 

Raucous laughter bounced off the buildings around them. Adora barely paid attention as a small group of people stumbled out into the street, led by a calm, lithe figure that only had the slightest smirk. They stepped into the glow of the streetlamp. Adora caught the leader’s eyes, mismatched and intensely focused. Both of them froze in their tracks. 

Adora growled. “Catra.”

The woman’s eyes narrowed as she sneered. “Hey, Adora.” 

“Why are you here?” 

“Am I not allowed to be?” 

“Adora?” Bow asked. “Who is that?”

“Bow, go home. I’ll catch up,” Adora said as her fists clenched. 

“What?”

“Just go.”

Glancing between the two women, Bow pursed his lips and turned to walk back the way he came, disappearing onto a little side street. Catra crossed her arms and tilted her head. Her gang formed a little circle around her. Three familiar faces stood out to Adora, but she ground her teeth and turned her eyes back to Catra.

Catra caught the reaction and raised an eyebrow. “You remember Lonnie, Kyle, and Rogelio, right?” she asked. 

A stocky girl with a ponytail of dreadlocks waved her hand, unsmiling. “I’m shocked,” she said. “For a while, we thought you were dead.” 

Catra leaned against a tall, broad shouldered woman with red scars on her arms. “Oh, and the big gal here is Scorpia,” she said. The woman scowled. “I don’t think you two ever met.” 

“Why are you here?” Adora demanded. 

“And we’re back to that.” Catra nudged Scorpia’s side. “Why don’t you guys go back to the house?” 

“Catra,” Scorpia began. 

“It’s fine,” Catra pressed. “Go. I’ll see you later.” 

Scowling at Adora, Scorpia turned and shepherded the bitter, glaring trio down the street. Adora waited until they were gone to step forward. “What are you guys doing here?” she asked. “I thought you said you would never leave the Fright Zone.” 

“You’re still calling Scorpion Crater ‘the Fright Zone?’” 

“You never called it anything else.”

“When I was ten. And yeah, we left. The home shut down after you disappeared.” 

“Good.” 

“Why does that matter to you?” Catra snapped. “You left and ended up in the big city. Doesn’t look like you did so bad for yourself, either.” She nodded to Adora’s jacket and smirked. “Despondos University, huh?”

“You don’t get to talk about my life!”

“Why not? I was only there for the better half of it.”

“You should have come with me if you were invested, then.” 

“Hey, you were the one that wanted to go make something of yourself.” 

“And you were the one that wanted to get involved in the mob.” “First, it was never the mob and you don’t know what you’re talking about. Second, you’re not any better, so stop acting like you are!” 

Adora opened her mouth to protest, but the words died on her tongue. She bit the inside of her cheek and took a breath. “I’m not going to fight with you in the middle of the street,” she said through gritted teeth. “Why are you in Etheria, anyway?” 

“We’re performing here for a while before our tour gets started up.” Catra narrowed her eyes. “Remember when all you wanted was to be a rock star? We were going to have everyone’s eyes on us! That’s what you said would happen!” 

“Yeah, and then I grew up.” 

“I had to grow up a lot faster than you in that place and you fucking know it.” 

“Whatever.” Adora turned to leave. 

Catra grabbed her arm, long black nails digging into her skin through her jacket. “You’re really going to leave me with that?” 

Adora stopped. She had spent years trying to remove that part of her life from her mind, forgetting all the turmoil and trauma and criminal dealings from her childhood. She wanted to erase that ghost town and the people that raised her and all the terrible things she witnessed, even if that meant leaving behind her best friends, too. She built a life for herself. She made something of herself when she shouldn’t have been worth anything. There were things - there were people - that you had to give up for that. 

She lifted her head but didn’t pull away. “Don’t acknowledge me if we see each other again. It’s better for both of us.” 

Catra laughed ruefully, cold and hollow. Her hand trailed down Adora’s arm and over her fingers as she let go. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” 

Adora barely restrained herself from running away down the street. When she reached the corner, Bow popped out from a hiding spot in the doorway of a store. Adora jumped and stifled a scream. 

“Who was that?” he whispered. 

“Someone I knew a long time ago,” Adora answered. 

“From where you came from?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Whoa.” Bow thought for a moment and grabbed Adora’s hand. “Do you… want to talk about it?”

“No. I don’t even want to think about it.” 

“Okay. Come on, let’s get back.” 

“Adora, are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just… wasn’t expecting to see her again.”

Bow squeezed her hand, offering his best comforting smile as he tugged her along. They returned to their dorms in silence and hugged goodbye before they went to their separate complexes. 

Perfuma was still awake when Adora walked in, flipping through a botany textbook as she examined her plants. She looked up as Adora flopped onto her bed. The girl’s typically carefree face was drawn tight with concern. 

“You saw Glimmer, right?” she asked. “Did she tell you what happened?”

“About the fight? Yeah, she told me.”

“Okay. Mermista called to check on her, just in case.” 

“She’s okay. She says it wasn’t really a fight, and I could only see a bloody nose, so…” Adora shrugged. “She’s fine.”

“That’s good,” Perfuma sighed. Adora turned away. “You can turn the light off if you want. I’ll turn on my desk lamp.” 

“It’s fine.” 

“Alright.” 

Adora got changed while Perfuma had her back turned and climbed into bed. Her thoughts raced a thousand miles a minute, violently swinging from concern for Glimmer to old pain and rage welling up after seeing Catra. It made her hands tremble as she tossed and turned throughout the night. When the tossing grew tiresome, she stared at the wall in the dark, listening to Perfuma snore across the room, and fell into a restless sleep. 

She woke up to a text from Glimmer that read, Mermista wants to know if you want to go out Friday.

Can’t, she wrote back. Study group. 

Glimmer sent her three sparkly hearts. Adora smiled to herself and replied with three blue hearts of her own. It was enough to calm her mind, at least for a while. 

The week dragged by until it felt like a month. Adora distracted herself with class and training and getting ready for tryouts. It was the only thing that managed to get her mind off of Catra. It had been years since she so much as thought about her old life, outside of all the nightmares that used to plague her sleep. 

She could barely keep her eyes open during her study group, nestled in the silence and dim light of the university library. Once it was finally over, she shouldered her heavy bag and headed out. Her schedule for the day was so packed that she hardly had time to train. She trekked through campus to the dorm buildings with her back hunched over, no matter how much she knew her back would hurt in the morning. 

Halfway home, her phone buzzed in her pocket. A picture of Bow’s smiling face illuminated the screen. “Hey, Bow,” she said, leaning against a streetlamp.

“Glimmer’s missing!” Bow screamed. 

“Bow, what?” she asked, startled.

“I-I don’t know what happened!” His voice was high pitched and cracked every other word as he stammered. “She stayed long enough to watch the band perform and then said she had a headache and wanted to leave but she told me to stay. She said she would call me as soon as she got home. It’s only a short walk and I-I thought she’d be fine!” 

Adora’s heart stopped. “Bow, wait, slow down.”

“She didn’t call, Adora! I waited and waited and then it was thirty minutes after she left and she still didn’t call. I tried texting her and calling her but she didn’t answer, so I left and stopped by the store to check on her and she’s not here! I can’t get ahold of her and I have no idea where she is! Adora, we have to start looking for her!”

“Okay, stay at the store! I’m coming right now!” 

Adora’s blood froze in her veins as she took off running. She knew she had to calm down before Bow saw and freaked out even worse, but she couldn’t stop her hands from shaking. 

Please be okay, she prayed as she sprinted across town. Glimmer, please be okay!

#glitradora #glimmadora #catradora #adora #catra #glimmer #bow #perfuma #huntara #She Ra #she ra reboot #spop #modern au #angst

[sparrowkingsley]

More badass women I forever Stan.

11. Spider-Gwen/Ghost-Spider

How to make my favorite superhero even more cool and steal my heart for real? Easy. Give me an alternate universe and give the cape over to a strong, female lead and I'm sold. Gwen Stacey, thank you for being truly awesome!

12. Sara Lance

So Sara Lance is definitely one of my favorite bisexual characters. She snarky, she got the puns, she god damn assassin, she the captain, she a god damn legend. I mean for real the moment she was introduced as Canary I was like... omg, *swoon* ! Her character development is just awesome.

Oh and Avalance is one of top ships for life.

13. Shuri

I was actually beyond sad she doesn't have more screen time in the movies because Shuri is the best. Witty and an actual to goddess genius who doesn't take shit from anyone. She even becomes the Black Panther in the comics for awhile and to see that in a onscreen adaptation would be truly mind blowing! I found out she has been introduced in Marvel Rising a show I really, really need to catch up like ASAP, I've just been distracted by other shows and stuff recently so... it is on my list! Oh and she is offically a Disney Princess! I don't make the rules, it is just a damn fact!

14. Adora/She-Ra

Speaking of my "distractions", obviously I've been living and breathing She-Ra and the Princesses of Power and I'm still pretty high on it and probably will always be. The She-Ra crew took us to new heights with LGBTQIA representation in animation by giving us a Canon lesbian main character and so many other things that just make me so damn happy. Adora has that dumb jock energy and that's something I absolutely ADORE! (Sorry, not sorry)

Cough, oh BTW Catra is my favorite (I'm definitely biased when it comes to her i admit it!) so I'm happy with them being together, like SOOOO much but my ship for Glimadora never really died and my main ship is still Glitradora

... sorry Bow you're still my best boy, I promise!

15. Harley Quinn

Speaking of characters bringing us some beautiful representation lately, ladies, gentlemen and my non binary beauties I give you the one and only Harley Quinn! With the latest adapation giving us all we wanted with her relationship with Ivy her being canonical Bisexual is only one reason why I truly love this character. Harley broke out from her unhealthy relationship and has become one of the greats if not the greatest anti heros of all time. Fight me on it. Won't matter. Because I love her and I will never stop.

16. Posion Ivy

You know you gotta love a woman that stands up for her beliefs... even if that belief is that plants are better than people annnnnnddddd she's not wrong. Personally I have a black thumb but I have thing for plant Goddesses like her.

17. Catwoman

Oh speaking of my favorite DC women, Catwoman was my first crush. Yes, the Michelle Pfeiffer version in Batman Returns. No, my little baby queer heart didn't understand why at the time. Basically this theif took my heart before anyone else. Definitely the reason I have an affinity toward cat like or cat girls in general soooooo there is that. I love her because no one can tell her what to do. Not even Batman. She is just like, shiny thing i want, i take and hmm maybe I care enough not to kill you if you get in my way but who knows?

18. Abby

So I obviously played the game at this point.

Oh do I stan Abby? Um yes obviously. How couod you not? Am I conflicted about it? Nope. Ellie will always be my girl in this series but at the end of the day Abby's character growth and development sort of stole the show. Like Joel changed when he met Ellie, Abby changed when she met Lev. Cricumstances made her the bad guy. Did she do fucked up shit? Of course. Does she deserve redemption? Yes. I know a lot of people still hate her but I don't get it. I think the perspective shift was one of the most brilliant story telling in a game I have ever witnessed. I'm still emotional about the whole experience.

If you are an asshole that sent the voice actor Laura Bailey death threats unfollow me because fuck you. Seriously. Fuck. You.

19. Azula

Speaking of characters that have done evil things. Let's turn our attention to one of my all time favorite villains. Azula came in and we asked Fire Lord who? Fourteen years, a Clever prodigy that literally has killer instinct and it is not afraid to use her deadly force.You fear her every time she catches up with Team Avatar and then... they go and make you feel bad for her at the end. At least I did.

She loses everything. Her allies. Her throne. Her mind. Humanly flawed and not at all one deminsional.

20. Seven of Nine

Y'all have no idea how truly fucking happy I am that Star Trek brought her back. Seven is my favorite character in the whole series. I was obsessed with the Borg as a kid and when they introduced her character I just instantly fangirled so hard over her. I'm still fangirling over her. Bringing her back literally made me cry. She literally has transformed so much through the years and I can not wait to see where her character goes from here.

To top it off, my heart literally tried to kill me when she had that hand hold scene with Raffi, I was like... omg... omg! Yes, please!!!!! That's all I wanted as a little queer watching this series i just didn't know it at the time.

My mother is literally pissed about this btw. In the novels Seven and Chakotay actually date for awhile and I was okay with it but she loved it. Then that scene in Picard happened. My mom and I have very few things we bond over and Star Trek is one of those. But basically she refuses to believe that hand hold is anything but platonic and I'm just waiting at this point like... come on Star Trek. Give me this one to me please.

Anyways...

Thank you for coming to my blog to witness my undying love for so many women characters. Probs more to come since I'm a hopeless, queer fangirl lifer!

#badass women characters #I forever stan