#like could molly see through illusions this whole time

[imlivinginyourtrashcan]

haha so prison of plastic, right?

I made an au for it. Its a swap au, but I swap both people and epithets! In this au, Molly has the Epithet Augment. She uses the Dream Bubbles/Illusions to make her own little worlds in an attempt to cope, when something doesn't go her way, she throws a fit about it, as any spoiled child would. Using her tears in order to get what she wants, it often works because her Mom doesn't want to hear her scream. Here's a small, improved excerpt from the au:

The archer positioned her bow, ready to fire the arrow into the large Hydra's echoing heart, her attack echoed throughout the land.

"PIERCIIIIIING URRRRSAAAA!"

...ly..

"NOOO!" The hydra's three heads wailed

"That is the attack of the ancient one!" Said one

"It will surely kill us!" Said another

...olly!...

The archer smirked like how they did in those cool cartoons. "THIS! IS FOR ALL THE VILLAGES YOU'VE FLOODED! AND FOR THE FAMILY YOU'VE TORN APART!!! THE ONE WATTERLOGGED BECAUSE OF YOU!!!

"Molly!"

An echo punched through the funtime fantasy world

"Ughh! Not now not now! I was just about to beat him!!"

She whined, impaitently tapping on the ground quickly with the tips of her toes.

The fantasy rippled, swirled and soon seperated, nothing but a fog now. Lorelai Blyndeff sticking her head through it all.

"Molly! You were on dish duty! You can't just bail like that!"

Molly turns her whole body to face her sister, who's head was poking through her Dream Bubble.

"LOOOOOORIIIIII!!! Go away! I was just about to slay the Honeyed Hydra!!!!"

She hissed, nearly screaming as she swatted her away like a disgusting bug on the windowsill. Causing her archery outfit, bow and magic attack to disappear into a fun dip like powder.

Molly Blyndeff, Lorelai's brat of a little sister. She's spent half their life after their Dad's death crying and whining to get whatever she wanted, and if she didn't get it, she'd make more of a fuss than she was brewing. Lorelai could see through her obvious manipulation of the people's heartstrings and has tried to call her out on in on SEVERAL occasions. But she can't win the fight against Molly's puppy eyes, she'd often grin at Lori before calling for their mother and claiming that she was being mean to her when she really was trying to shape her away from being a spoiled brat. Alas, their mother is too swayed by the puppy eyes and crying to take Lorelai's side.

"You've been playing for THREE HOURS, Molly. C'mon, Mom said its your turn!"

Molly grumbled, she can't use her tricks on Lorelai, since she can see right through her. Nor can she seek the help of her Mother, knowing that there's a chance he could take Lorelai's side. She crossed her long sleeves over each other,

"You're so mean to me, Lori! I can never have fun! All you do is ruin everything!"

Ah, the perfect tactic, guilt tripping. If she can't get any help, she'll pin the blame on the person 'ruining everything'.

"Nice try, Bear Cub, I'm not doing the dishes for you this time, I've got things to do too"

"UGHHHHHH!!!!" Molly grinned, falling to the floor dramatically the entire time she did.

Lorelai stared in disbelief at the little girl Molly was growing up to be, she stepped fully into the Dream Bubble, the scenery fogging away wherever she stepped. She lightly kicked Molly to get her to snap out of her rage fueled funk.

"Get up, no matter how much you pout, you still have dishes to do."

"NO!!!! No no no no no!"

Molly screamed back in rage, snapping her head up and kicking her legs. She stopped briefly only for the bear to be unleashed again,

"JUST GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT!!! YOURE RUINING MY LIFE!!!!"

Lori wasn't going to let some brat kid boss her around, she was going to say something, though she couldn't get it out before a screaming and crying Molly was pushing her out of her customized safe space. Then, out the door Lorelai was, hearing a click behind her. She knew what that meant, so she turned around and pounded on the door.

"HEY!!!"

BANG BANG BANG

"MOLLY!!!!"

...

Now for Lorelai! Now she has the Epithet "Dumb", like Molly in the actual show/book. You know what it is, now for another excerpt!

"Uhhhhhh... guys?" Lorelai called

"What? You find somethin?" Giovanni called back

"Yeeeeahhhh..."

Giovanni and Rick trotted over, with Giovanni shoving Rick out of the way in order to see what Lorelai had found.

Lori found a dead body.

Or, at least that's what it appeared to be, the most notable thing about the body, aside from it appearing dead was the jingling bells decorating her hair. Most of the jelly fish had wriggled their way into the bells on the bottom, the rest all laying beside her in the sand, ready to sting her at any second.

"Is she... truly dead?!?!?!" Rick shivered, not even able to comprehend the thought.

"Not sure" Lorelai replied back, looking at him, and then to the dead looking girl.

"AHHH!!!" He squeaked, unable to handle this situations severity. But to be fair, who would be? "No-one can know about this" Finishing his words with a disturbingly grim tone, he starts rushing toward the body in a cartoonish run. He bends over to pick it up before Giovanni stops him.

"Wait wait wait wait!"

"WHAT?!?"

Rick shouted back, still halfway bent down to drag the body back into the ocean.

"We should see if she has anything valuable! It's like a video game! Ya gotta loot every dead guy, gal, or nonbinary pal ya find!"

"HAH!" Rick barked, already sweating buckets, as he faces Giovanni "If you'd like to get arrested, perhaps!" He turns back to the body, going to grab for it "Your finger prints will get all over it that way!" in a twist of irony, he latches his arms onto the body.

Giovanni snrks, "Y'know you'll get your prints on it if you grab it too, yeah?'

Rick gasps, dropping the body's lifeless arm, looking at his hands as if he HIMSELF had committed the murder.

"You're right!"

Rick falls down onto the sand like an anime character, burrowing his fists harshly so that they make two fist sized craters in the sand. He begins to cry big dumb tears

"I'm going to the penthouse!" Rick wails, letting out a squeak at a pitch only dogs can hear. "Please, dear friends! Bail me out!"

"Psssh, Rick, you're such a weenie."

Giovanni grabs a stray stick from the beach and pokes the body with it as to not get his hand prints on the body like Rick did. She was surrounded by jelly fish as if it were rocks on around the pond.

"Huh! Well wouldja look at that!"

He chirped, eye brows a good distance away from his eyes.

"Looks like you win Lori!" He says, tossing the Apple Cider flavored lip balm over to Lorelai. Suddenly the body sprouted to laugh, coughing up a jelly fish that had crawled its way down her esophagous

"Haugh-ha-ga-ha- w- win!?"

Rick perked his head up and The trio instinctively screamed

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"

The body screamed right back

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"ZOMBIE!!!!" Rick shrieked, backing away in fear, picking up the stick that Giovanni had tossed away once he saw the body sprout back like a plant someone thought was going to die.

"Zombie?!" The body replied, twirling her head around rapidly, jelly fish being flung from her hair at intense speeds. The trio quickly ducked to avoid the potential of being stung. "Where?!?!"

She quickly got up and started throwing her hand swiftly as if she were throwing several baseballs, Lorelai took notice of what came out of the small girls hand as she jingled through each attack. "Hm!" she remarked, staring at her hand. "Well, that's quite troubling! Perhaps this is a surface interference, from the surface world! That would make the most sense!"

Giovanni got up from his crouching position, getting hit in the face with a jelly fish. Thankfully, it was long dead and didn't sting him. He slid it off his face.

"Hey, wait a sec, this chick ain't a zombie! Way too much skin! Look, I get zombies CAN have skin and all but that's only if they're fresh, and I'm guessing that she's been there for a while. So my conclusion is THIS!!!"

Giovanni did an over the top point to accentuate his reveal.

"SHE IS CLEARLY.... A GHOST! A... magic- GHOST! YEAH! Or- or the reincarnation of a Sheep Jellyfish hybrid! A SHELLYFISH!!! HAHA!!!! I know your secret now LADY!"

The lady put a hand to her mouth, chuckling inaudibly into her hand. "You're quite a funny one, Mister bright hair!" She twirls around towards them, putting her hands together with a bright smile. "I am no Shellyfish zombie-ghost! I..... am a magical girl!" She did a Sailor Moon esc pose, the trio stared at her in disbelief.

No-one thought she was serious.

The girl panicked "Uh- uh- uh- HERE! Let me show you!" She twisted her whole body back and flung forward an invisible force like a boomerang. When she saw that nothing had happened, she tried again. Lorelai did notice a small string of black energy coming out in a faded boomerang position, before poofing away pathetically. She didn't say anything, knowing the kid probably just wanted to impress a bunch of people older than she was.

The newly revived little girl was around 12 years old, which, when around a group of 17 year old's was practically the same as being a baby. The "magical girl" was pale, with eyes bluer than the ocean itself. Her blonde hair decorated in little bells, accompanied by a tattered pink dress with now dirtied white fluff in other areas. She nervously chuckled

"Ahahaha! C'moooon magiiiiiic! Work! Work o pretty please work! A bunch of adults are watching!"

She mumbled to herself in desperation, but alas, her magic did not cooperate. She wailed in shock,

"WAHHHH-HAH-HAAA?!? What?!? But- It usually WORKS!!!! What is going ON today?! Are my friends not friending?! I NEED ANSWERS!!!"

The little girl stomped over in the most non threatening way possible.

"Excuse me, kind older folk! Would any of you care to be my friends?" She batted her eyes innocently. Giovanni immediately shut her down

"Nuh uh kid, no way"

"Awwww... why not?!"

"Because you're like, a baby, and we're like, way older than you? And it'd be really weird for a bunch of 17 year old's to hang around a kid???"

"Haha! Wow! Owie! Ow! Owchie!" The girl forced out a chuckle, putting her hands on her hips to distract herself from the fact she felt like crying big stupid tears. "I- I'll have you know I am VERY mature for someone who is 12 years of age!"

Rick stepped out from his friends, "Hold on, you, you said you're magic, correct?"

"Yes! Indeed! I am a Magical Girl, after all!"

"Perfect! How fortunate! HAHAH!" Rick echoed a belly laugh, grinning somewhat creepily at her, making her kind of regret ever meeting him. Lorelai tapped Rick on the shoulder.

"Rick, you're doing the thing again."

"Haha! Oops! Sorry!"

Rick now smiled in a more normal looking way, "My name is Rick Shades, the XV of the Shades clan! I assume you've heard of us?"

"Nope!" Exclaimed the magical girl with innocent pride, Giovanni snickered again which made Lori elbow him. Rick felt like he could turn to stone at any moment, but continued with his tale.

"The people in my family are MOST powerful witches and wizards! Every five years, the oldest heir is destined to do BATTLE with the UNHOOOOOOLY PUPPETEER!!! And if we do not... we must prepare for the ENDDDD!!! The adventurer must pick up a faithful knight!"

Rick gestures to Lorelai, "A skilled alchemist" he gestured to Giovanni. "As well as a Tanky sort of fellow, to take the hits for us, as well as a skilled, wise mentor!" Rick put his hands on his shoulders, bending down to the girl's height.

"Would you perhaps be interested?"

The girl pondered the thought, humming. Lorelai had quickly picked up on the 'Rick is being a weirdo' signs, dragging him and Giovanni away. She never blamed Rick for his lack of social skills, ability to pick up on social cues or discomforts with large crowds. She knew he never got out much when he was young, but sometimes she has to put her foot down when he's doing something the public could perceive as weird, such as trying to build a friendship with a 12 year old when you're way older.

"Oh... oh no... sorry to put a stop to this but- we gotta go! Oh- oh nooooo...We- we got a class! And... we REALLY don't wanna miss it... oh nooooo"

"W- wait! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT!!!!!!!" The little girl shrieked, quickly running up to them, skidding with a halt. "Shouldn't you keep me in your fun fun friendship magic circle? Y- you know?? In case you need me to- to mentor you?????"

"Hmmmm..." Rick thought about it, squinting through his dorky looking shades. "Well, that make sense!"

"RICK!" Lorelai protested, but it was too late.

"Very well! My name is Phoenica Fleecity! Shall we be..." She extended her hand. "Friends?"

"Indeed we shall!" Rick held her palm with the awareness of a dog about to eat a brownie, Lorelai and Giovanni had both tried to stop him, and ultimately failed. The sky tore asunder, several amounts of black shadow sheep extended in tidal waves, circling the two with loud jingles.

JINGLE

JINGLE

BAAAA

The sheep fell onto each other, the two sets forming into arrows, one piercing Rick's chest, and the other piercing Phoenica's.

"The pact... has been sealed! Hehehee..." Phoenica chuckled into her hand, face contorting into mischief, the mischief erupting into madness and lightning crowded around the group. "Heheheeh....hahaha...AHAHAHHAH!!!" The last laugh came out in a squeak, then her hands came behind her back, pushing herself to and fro in a sway, stopping with her toes off the ground, tilting her head with a smile. "Pleasure to meet you!"

Baaa

The world was as it had been previously, not a person in sight on the beach. It was only those four,

"Wait.... did that actually just happen?" Lorelai thought aloud to herself.

"Now now now!" Phoenica removed her hand from Rick's grasp, raising it daintily like a private school girl. "Would anyone else like to shake the hand of friendship?" She asked, waving her hand robotically.

Giovanni and Lori quickly stepped back, trying to maintain a safe distance from Rick in case Phoenica had cursed him.

"R...rick?" Lori uttered in discomforted fear. "You uh... you okay there, buddy?"

"I... feel... AMAZING!!!" Rick jumped up, running around, kicking and squealing like a kid who had just gotten the latest gaming console, stopping dead in his tracks beside Phoeinca.

"After all, I had gained a new friend! Phoenica Fleecity!"

Phoenica nodded to confirm that they were indeed friends "Indeed! We are the friendy-ist of friends! Bound by the soul! Soul-MATES, if you will!"

"HA!" Rick barked, throwing his head back with his hands on his waist, tilting his head back down. "Friendshaped AND hilarious! Its a two in one deal!"

Giovanni scrunched his face. "Kid, work on your phrasing"

Phoenica tilted her head sideways like a puppy who you had just told was bad, but didn't understand why. "Huh?" she gasped. "Ohhhh! No! no no no no! Nothing at ALL Like what you're thinking! He's like, fourty anyways!" She waved off whatever thoughts we were thinking, Rick felt as though he actually got stabbed with the shadow arrows this time, falling to his knees again, pressing his hands into the sand.

She clasps her hands, gleefully turning to Rick "Well then, I suppose since we *are* friends, I can tell you my secret!" She turned back to face the others "My Epithet is... Soulmates! Meaning, I keep all my mates, or, friends, as is most commonly said riiiiiiiiiight here!"

She points to the right side of her chest, the wrong one. Giovanni raised an eyebrow.

"Your chest?"

"Oh no no no!" Phoenica shook her head "My heart!"

"Your hearts on the other side"

"Oh!" Phoenica looked down, realizing her mistake before quickly fixing it. "They're kept right here!"

"So, what? Is Rick like...in a friendship cage or something?"

"Nnnnnnope! Just means that I can do, what HE can do! Observe!"

She skipped eagerly over to Rick, bending towards him. "Mister Rick Shades, what can you do?"

Rick pondered over it before Lorelai dragged him back towards herself and Giovanni quickly before he could stupidly get himself caught in a situation nobody wanted to deal with.

"Rick, don't. Y'know all those Ztreet Zmartz for Kidz videos they showed us? I think NOW is as good a time as any to start puttin' em to use"

"What is a Ztreet Zmartz?" Rick batted his eyes

Lori groaned, oh right, Rick was homeschooled half his life. "Basically safety PSAS warning us about strangers."

"Ohhh!" Rick's eyes widened at the realization, falling closed in laughter as he shook his head, opening them back up. "But Phoenica is no stranger! She is my new friend!"

"YES INDEED I AM A FRIEND!!!!" Phoenica screamed. "YOU CAN TRUST ME!!!! I AM INCREDIBLY TRUSTWORTHY!!!!!!!"

"Don't worry! I believe you!" Rick shouted back, worming his way out of Lorelai's hands, Lori couldn't help but face palm at his stupidity as he paced around, trying to discover what he was best at.

"I'm quite good at school work! The best, even! Dispite being homeschooled for so long! I'm great at it!"

Phoenica laughed along with Rick's claims, she had no idea what schoolwork was, but she didn't want her newest buddy chum chum pal friend buddy chum chum chum pal to think she was uncool. Rick shimmied his bookbag off of himself, grabbing out last nights homework, holding it up dramatically like Macbeth would a skull. "BEHOLD!!!! THE DREADED ALGEBRA II!!!" he bellowed, passing it to Phoenica. He had also handed her a pencil, "Here! You try!"

Phoenica nodded, scribbling a few nonsense numbers as if she were on auto pilot, giggling the whole time like a gremlin being fed after midnight. She soon finished, passing it back to Rick with a smile. "Done!"

Rick took the paper, and Phoenica began her monolouge.

"Now you see! That challenge for Hi....skewl...ers.... would've proven too much! But, with the power of Soulmates, friendship, and MAGIC! I got it done in a matter of seconds!" She clapped "Thank you Rick for bestowing your mathly knowledge onto me!"

Rick gasped dramatically, gripping the paper. "You- you used my knowledge to do this! Thats- thats CHEATING!" he stood up, pointing a finger. "You're a cheater cheater pumpkin eater! I cannot be friends with a girl who PUMPKIN EATS!"

Phoenica gasped, a tear starting to fall. The sky tore open again as the arrows reversed out of their hearts, reverting back into sheep that scuttled back into the sky. "NOOOOOOO!!!!" Phoenica wailed, burying her shameful cheating cheating pumpkin eating face into her hands. "MY KNOWLEDGE!!!! WAHHHHHH!!!"

A kitchen timer went off in Giovanni's head, causing him to laugh "Wait? Your- Your weakness is people- NOT being friends with you?! Hah... huh ha... huh HAHAHAHAHAHA!! OH MY GOD THATS RICH!!! HAHAHAH!!! WHAT A DORK!!! HAH!"

Lorelai harshly jabbed his arm with her elbow, making him yell out an "OWWWW!!". Lorelai couldn't help but roll her eyes, Phoenica whimpered as she stared at her now wet hands.

"Is this why all my previous friends had stopped friending?! Is it because I am a... pumpkin eater?! Why didnt anyone TELL me! I would've stopped eating pumpkins right away!! Now everyone's ignoring me!!!" She sobbed heavily, falling to her knees.

Rick couldn't help but feel bad, coming to her side and wrapping an arm around her, he was crying to.

"Oh, Phoenica! I am SO terribly sorry! It just..." He sniffled "I HATE cheaters, you know? They grind my gears so hard that I can't think! But... if you vow to never use your knowledge for cheating... I would be honored to call you friend!"

Phoenica gasped, wrapping both arms around Rick and squeezing him as tight as she could. "Rick!!!!! My dearest surface friend! I pinky winky promise to never EVER cheat again! If I break this promise then..." she whiped her eyes, looking into his with complete sincerity. "You have all the right to break my pinky!"

Rick looked touched, starting to regain his smile "Phoenica..." he fully accepted her hug. "That is all my heart ever wanted to hear!"

The sky ripped apart like paper, the sheeps returning, forming one big arrow that pierced through them both. Phoenica shot up, deciding that her crying time was over!

"Nooooow! Have you two changed your minds???? Would you still like to be friends?!?!?!? Please??? Pretty please???"

"Uhhh.. yeah no I'm good." Giovanni steps back

Lorelai also steps back, "Me too, sorry kid."

Phoenica looked absolutely heartbroken, before shaking her head. "Uhh... well... what about the winny thingy?

"Winny thingy?" Giovanni asked

"Win! Winner! Wining! Something something something you win! That's what you guys were saying when I woke up! What is the game? What is there to win? CAN I even win? Oh, I bet I could win anything and everything ever! Please please please let me win something! Then we can all be friends and skip along with the sheep in the clouds!" Phoenica begged desperately, clasping her hands together.

Lorelai raised a brow. "You sound kinda desperate."

"I AM!!! Thank you for noticing!"

"That... isn't a complement..."

"Oh! Then UN-Thank you for noticing!"

Gears shifted in Giovanni's head as she tried to figure out what this silly little bell ridden girl was talking about, then it hit him, like a homerun at a big league baseball game.

"Ohhhh! You mean the prizes!" Giovanni snapped a finger, grinning excitedly "We were taking a buncha these jelly fish an' throwin' em back in the sea! Whoever finds the most, throws em back in the ocean without gettin' stung wins! Oh! An' if you find a cool thing WITHOUT a metal detector, you get extra points! Whoever's got the most points gets a little treat!"

Not even a moment after the words escaped Giovanni's lips, Phoenica was running around the beach. She tossed jellyfish after jellyfish back into the sea, occasionally getting stung. She would sometimes find a trinket only SHE thought was cool and stuff it into the pockets of her worn out dress. She soon came back to the trio, huffing wildly like a runner who had just crossed the finish line last in a marathon.

"I've tossed 164 jelly fish back, got stung 35 times and found 52 cool trinkets!"

Phoenica took what was in her pockets out of them, what she collected was mostly shells, seaweed, and coins. She put them back in her pockets with puppy eyes.

"Does that mean I get a treat now? I'm afraid I haven't eaten in days!"

"DAYS?!?!?!" The trio shouted with concern, all starting to scrounge through their stuff, except for Rick who was running around and screaming in a panic.

To no avail, all Giovanni had was an old empty thermos of Soup. It was stained from the time he tried to mix a bunch of Soups together with smoothie logic. Spoiler, it didn't taste good and he threw up afterwards.

Lorelai took out the lip balm she had recieved, Phoenica's eyes locked on it.

"Whats that? Is that the treat? Can I have it? Can I? Can I?"

"Uhhhh...." Lorelai looked down at the lip balm, extending it out. "This is a lip balm..."

"Haha! Wowie! Never mind then! Don't want to explode! Haha! Ha! Ha!" Phoenica was sweating again.

Lorelai shook her head, "No no no no" she unscrewed the cap to show her, speaking slowly like you would an alien in a movie. "Baaaaalm.... Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalm, with an LLLLLLL. Its like, lip stuff you put on your lips"

"Wow! Smells yummy! Thank you!" Phoenica knelt down, chomping down on the balm. Regret set in for her immediately as she coughed, it shot down her throat in seconds. "MMMM!!!! BADDDDD!!!!" she cried.

"NO NO NO NO NO DO NOT SWALLOW THAT!!!" Giovanni butted in, grabbing Phoenica by the shoulders, tears streamed down her face quickly. "Too late!!!! ITS ALREADY IN MY TUMMY!!!!"

"NOOOOOO!!!!" Rick dramatically fainted like a goat, clutching the sand like a blanket. "My friend is going to die..."

"IM GOING TO DIE?!?!" Phoenica gasped.

"No! No! Nobody is going to DIE!" Lorelai tried to reassure, but it was hard with a child and someone who was nearly an adult crying in unison. Giovanni started to panic and rummage through Rick's backpack for literally ANYTHING to drink. All he found was an old potion he had given him.

"Is... is that a drink?" Phoenica asked meekly "I haven't drunken anything in days! Well... besides Salt Water! Oh goodness! I believe it *is* the end!"

"DO NOT SAY SUCH DRIVEL, PHOENICA!" Rick shouted.

"Rick, others, we are friends...correct?" Phoenica strained sadly, like a sick kid on a TV show.

"Uhhh... pretty sure?" Lorelai hesitated

"Please.... do not let me die."

Phoenica ragdolled onto the sand, panic began setting in for the trio as they scrambled like headless chickens trying not to squawk in fear.

...

Hope you enjoy!!! :D

#epithet erased headcannons #epithet erased meme #epithet oc #epithet erased ramsey #epithet erased fanart #epithet erased au #prison of plastic spoilers #epithet erased prison of plastic #prison of plastic #rick shades #lorelai blyndeff #molly blyndeff #giovanni potage #prison of plastic au #swap au #epithet erased #epithet spoilers #anime campaign

[casukaga]

since molly already had the eye tats when the campaign started, do you think he could’ve just telepathically communicated with someone if he tried hard enough

#hkGDKFN #idk if matt fleshed out that much about the somnovum shit early campaign like eye powers — but i mean #🤔🤔? #like #it’s not like molly knew the eyes were more than just tats but like if out of the blue early campaign he was like #‘i’m gonna try to talk to yasha telepathically’— #or something #could’ve worked right 👁👄👁 #and whatever other powers the other tats gave him ig #like could molly see through illusions this whole time? wowza! #or maybe not? maybe the eyes just came into effect when lucien was lucien idk #critical role #casu’s ramblings #my shtuff

[angelsndragons]

fjord’s feelings for caduceus changed in episodes 98-99

by which i mean, fjord finally realized how special and important he is to caduceus, which in turn set the tone of their relationship for the rest of the campaign. buckle up, this is a long one.

not when fjord threw away his sword and went to caduceus instead of jester. or when caduceus presented him with the star razor. or after the citadel fight when caduceus gave him his holy symbol. i think things changed for fjord in episode 98-99, when caduceus saved his life and removed the orb.

this is going to require some context.

because here’s the thing: fjord’s always looking for the price, waiting for the catch or other shoe to drop. people caring for him because of him with no strings attached is unprecedented. vandren and the world taught fjord that love is conditional, that only if you hide what others would find ugly and make yourself useful to them will they deign to give you a scrap of affection. i don’t think vandren did this maliciously, mind you, it was just part of his worldview and fjord’s life up to and beyond that point supported it. we can see that right up to the end of the show, where fjord is terrified that vandren didn’t remember him or that he didn’t mean nearly as much to the man as vandren did to him.

so we have fjord, who learned to don masks and hide his truest self, including his best and worst aspects. while fjord made the nein into a coherent group, into a force, a crew, a family, even, he still waited for that other shoe to drop. waited for the day that they would reject him because he was no longer useful or because he pushed them too far. you can see this waiting all over the early campaign; he’s not looking for an excuse like caleb to cut and run but he anticipates nearly all the moments that almost fractured the nein, in spite of that low wisdom score. while jester carried the guilt of not being able to save molly, fjord carried the guilt of not protecting the group in that crucial moment. travis confirmed on talks that fjord’s biggest fear when he lost his powers the first time was that he would no longer be useful and be kicked out of the group. 

that’s why fjord damn near broke down at the end of 72. the nein, no questions asked, with their standard level of snark, accepted that he was going to be a liability and kept him around anyway. armed him anyway. declared that he was no liability and that they would help him along until he could help himself and them again. this unconditional acceptance caught fjord completely off guard. it always does, really. because caduceus had said for months, an out of game half a year, that he was looking to reforge the sword as a gift for fjord. he said this to fjord’s face. he did not change course when he learned that the sword was a legendary blade forged by acolytes of the wildmother and moonweaver. the blade was still meant for fjord, even if fjord was still chained to uk’otoa. fjord extends his love and protection to the nein but is still not convinced the reverse is true. he was starting to believe it but he wasn’t quite there yet.

caduceus has a high enough wisdom to understand that’s fjord’s hang up even if he doesn’t quite understand the reasoning behind it. that’s why he pulls fjord aside in ep 75 and tells him that he doesn’t have to choose the wildmother, that there are other gods and other ideas out there looking for a champion. fjord, who at this point considers wildmom his only option (travis says she’s the only one who’s shown the slightest interest in fjord and that’s why he’s gunning for her), is befuddled by caduceus and this whole talk, so much so the pair end up talking past each other for the next several episodes.

after fjord officially becomes a paladin, things between him and caduceus become fairly...unsettled compared to their previous interactions. they talk past each other more, they aren’t in sync enough to double team those social interactions they were just starting to get good at. things are just weird for a while. to me, that’s fjord waiting for the catch, waiting for caduceus to call in some favor or something like it. and he keeps getting confused when caduceus doesn’t. so he tries once or twice to follow in caduceus’ footsteps and do as he would instead. and it just makes things weirder. these two don’t have a moment together that doesn’t leave one of them confused or unsatisfied until ep 87, when caduceus gives fjord the holy symbol and inadvertently kicks off the next phase of their relationship. because here, caduceus tries to put them back on equal footing and fjord recognizes it. caduceus rejects framing their relationship as mentor/student and tells fjord he doesn’t need caduceus to give him answers. fjord is “well on his way.”

by defining what they aren’t, mentor/student, our two boys inadvertently ask the question, “so what are we?” honestly, it’s a question that the entire group grapples with in the 90s as they reintegrate yasha, as veth struggles with the question of changing back and whether she can stay with the nein, as beau tries to sacrifice herself for veth, as jester learns some uncomfortable truths about the traveler, as caduceus finds his family again. fjord and caduceus can easily define what they aren’t - not mentor/student, not brothers or cousins- but what they actually are stumps both of them.

their relationship doesn't look like any of their relationships with the others: beau is fjord's bro and first mate, caleb is fjord's complicated mirror and admiree, jester his crush and first person he learned to be vulnerable with, veth his antagonistic sibling. on caduceus' side, caleb is the one he looks to for a fellow project nerd and clear, unvarnished goals, beau and jester are the sisters caduceus misses, yasha the quiet beloved barbarian he understands better than the rest, and veth a mess he wants to help but can't. but fjord and caduceus' relationship is highly undefined at this point. notably undefined, beyond their newly shared connection to melora. at the dinner with essek, we get the stone bomb. and travis and fjord panic. like no, seriously, they spend the next four episodes low key panicking over this revelation. this ties back to fjord waiting for those other shoes to drop but it’s also more than that.

when it comes to destiny, fjord has always been the answer, the self made man, to both caduceus and caleb’s questions about destiny. he makes choices about who he is, who he wants to be, and takes actions towards those goals. he is one of those rare people who can wear many different masks, take on many different roles, while still maintaining his sense of self and becoming a fuller version of who he is. when I say fjord is the answer to destiny, what i mean is that he is what ioun said way back in c1 about Fate: mortals make choices and through those choices, destiny is fulfilled. he is the answer to caduceus' own growth from passive instrument waiting for someone to play him to active communicator in this conversation between gods and mortals. in this sense, fjord is what caduceus learns to be (this is exactly why caduceus rejects a mentor role; he has as much to learn from fjord as vice versa).

so for this coincidence to pop up, this idea that maybe fjord only had the illusion of choice to extend his service to the wildmother, that maybe somehow he was manipulated again, that there was some grand destiny pushing things and fjord had no say in it, yeah, i can see why fjord was low-key terrified. so is this what fjord and caduceus are: just some predestined grand fairy tale partnership neither of them have that much say in? episode 96 resoundingly rejects that label too. for one thing, none of the stones or clays treat fjord's last name as anything amazing or spectacular. for another, this string of episodes gives us caduceus at his most human. the terror of not knowing what happened to his family, the uncertainty of his homecoming, the relief of saving his family and home, the irritation at the way the chaos crew treats the temple, the playful attitude caduceus cultivates after, it's all on display. caduceus drops much of his placid exterior and willingly allows the nein to see sheer depth of emotion he has.

which leads me back to episode 98-99. uk’otoa’s agents come for fjord. and caduceus is pissed. travis and ashley both said on talks that they hadn’t really seen taliesin that pissed, that it was like someone had threatened an actual loved one of his. fjord dies. and comes back to an exhausted, still pissed off firbolg who is five seconds away from snapping archmage vess derogna’s head off for interrupting his prayer of healing. taliesin doesn’t even begin to relax until they start interrogating the dead fish people the next day. once caduceus confirms the ball is still in fjord, notably caduceus and caleb were the two who remembered, fjord starts asking for a way to remove it. he asks caduceus to start a commune with wildmom in tandem with jester’s commune with the traveler. caleb tells fjord that caduceus fought “very hard for you while you were down, i don’t know if he’s up to it.” having heard that, caduceus still tries, with his first divine intervention attempt of the campaign. and when jester figures out that greater restoration will work, caduceus pushes through his exhaustion, takes charge, and goes through a truly terrifying greater restoration with fjord to remove the ball. convulsing, seizing, shuddering, collapsing, etc.

in those moments, and in the quiet after when fjord confirms that he still has his powers, it finally hits him that yes, people can protect, fight, and love him for who he is alone. there is no chain or other shoe waiting to be dropped here. the wildmother is no uk’otoa, to punish or take power at a whim. caduceus will fight with everything he has and then some for fjord because he loves him (not for nothing does fjord only realizes the depths of jester’s feelings when she uses heal on him). who are caduceus and fjord to each other? they are people who will fight for one another and the others as far as they can. fjord says over and over again that he wants to protect the nein and look out for them because he cares for them. he demonstrates it over and over again as well. caduceus says basically the same thing; he wants everyone safe and happily on their way and will stay until they are. he demonstrates this all the time as well. this is, i think, the first time that he demonstrates his dedication so unequivocally, free of the artifice of duty, fully committed through love. fjord recognizes this in caduceus and caduceus does in fjord.

i say this is a turning point because, while they don’t really have another super in depth conversation alone together, these two start clocking each other and openly help and look out for each other. there’s an ease and intimacy to the relationship after this. fjord watching caduceus swim near vokodo’s lair, fjord being ready to hand over his armor to caduceus when it looks like his won’t be ready, fjord, caduceus, and beau plotting behind jester’s back to keep her safe from the traveler, the absolute offense fjord takes to eadwulf after he spoke to caduceus like that, fjord levels up in paladin after caduceus tells him he’s proud to know him, all the way to the end of the show when fjord shelters the clerics and tells them to finish lucien, we get little moments like these from both of them. hell, caduceus is the first person in the campaign to tell fjord directly that he loves him.

#cr #critical role #cr meta #fjorclay #wildbros #fjord #caduceus clay #prim did theirs so i'm doing mine #in b4 the wrap-up #just barely #and ran out of steam at the end #i'll expand on that later #gotta finish my vm v m9 meta #and the cockroach party analysis

[failedskillcheck]

Change with the Tides (Part 1/??)

A/N: Hiya! This is a little thing that I wanted to write, where the reader is a changeling wizard/rouge working for the Gentleman and joins the Mighty Nein! This takes place around 2x14-2x16. I’ll probably write it for the whole campaign.

You grew up in the various orphanages of Wildemont, starting in Port Damali, then Alfeild, Nogvurot, Trostenwald, Rexxentrum, and Deastock, eventually ending up in Zadash.

Due to your race, people found it hard to trust you. You didn’t really blame them, you had been picking pockets since you were seven. In Alfeild, you managed to steal a few spellbooks off of a traveller and began teaching yourself magic. Mostly Illusion spells, but you got your hand on some water-based magic as well.

When you grew out of the system, you were in Zadash, so you went about looking for the Gentleman. By the time you were 23, you had a secure career with him.

That is until a group barged into the underground bar, a strange collection of individuals calling themselves the Mighty Nein… but there were only seven.

From your seat at the bar, you couldn’t see them. You subtly put up your usual disguise, a human woman with brown hair and dark eyes, except you keep the hair a platinum blonde, the closest colour to your true form.

Cree noted one of the adventurers, a purple teifling she called Lucien. The man was a literal peacock. In fact, you’re pretty sure you saw a peacock tattoo creeping up his neck. You noted the others. An aloof half-orc, an energetic blue teifling, a massive woman who could probably crush you, a human woman in Cobalt Soul blue, and a human man in dirty brown clothing, sticking close to a small goblin. The goblin surprised you. You were all too aware of what people thought of monstrous races like hers.

The group went to the Gentlemans’ table, and you snickered, sipping on your drink. Then, Clive comes over and leans over the bar, “He needs you.” You sigh, down the rest of your drink, and walk over to the table, knowing that the drink will be paid off later.

“What’s up Boss?” You say as you reach the table, grabbing the chair closest to him. You’re his best employee. He knows that, everyone here knows that. There’s very little you can’t get away with.

“Ah, Y/N. Meet the Mighty Nein. You may recognize those two,” he gestures to the purple teifling and the monk, “as the two who murdered the High-Rictor. They’ve agreed to do me a favour, in exchange for me clearing their names.”

“So you’re the sorry sods he’s making go to that blasted facility,” you turned your head to the Gentleman, “Let me guess, I’m going with them?”

“You are the one who found it.”

“So when do we leave?” You asked, looking back at the group, who all seemed to be talking to one another. All of them except for the half-orc, who was instead watching you.

“Tomorrow, we need to prepare first.”

The Gentleman waved you off, and you went to your bed in the upper part of the Evening Nip, then preparing some things for your mission tomorrow. You went down to the bar, waiting for the Mighty Nein.

They finally arrived, and they were blindfolded and escorted to a dock, where you parted ways with you’re colleagues and rowed down the river with the Mighty Nein. You led them down the river, not talking and very aware that the half-orc and the monk were watching you. The Nein then decides to pull a race, and the goblin uses her ring of water walking. Until she hits a rock.

As she’s being pulled into the boat, you see a dark mantle drop, wrapping around her head, as well as the man and the half-orc. Luckily, you’re able to defeat them with almost no injuries.

“Those weren’t there before, I swear.” You say as the monk woman accuses you of trying to kill them. As she’s yelling at you, she stops and urges everyone to go faster due to rock monsters.

You drift downward before docking and sitting on the gravel beach as the large woman and blue teifling clear the rockslide.

“Mind telling us your name?” the half-orc asks, sitting beside you,

“Y/N,” you say, looking over, “And no, no last name. What about you?”

“I’m Fjord,” he says, then points to his party, “That there’s Beauregard and Jester. Then Mollymauk and Yasha. Those two are Caleb and Nott.” He pointed to where the goblin was braiding flowers into the man’s hair.

“Right. Apologies for the cave-in, when I first discovered this place, my group got attacked, one of them decide to destroy the wall.”

“Not a problem Y/N!” says Jester, clearing away the last rocks, “See, already cleared”

Mollymauk walks over and offers you his hand to helo you get up, as he does, he pulls you close to whisper in your ear, “Do you have any clue who I was?”

Was. Interesting choice of words, Mr. Mollymauk. “No, Cree seemed to though. So whatever little gang you two were in, I certainly wasn’t a member.”

“Something tells me there’s more to you than meets the eye Y/N, and I for one, am interested to find out what.”

Mollymauk back off at my shocked expression, walking away before saying over his shoulder, “And it’s just Molly, dear.”

We go down the stairs, through many trapped rooms (which Nott kept forgetting to check, leaving you to pick up her slack), Fjord almost falls down a pit, before finally reaching a large chamber.

The first thing you notice in the room is a teleportation circle, though it’s broken. You tell this to the Nein, which makes Caleb give you a quizzical look “And how do you know what a broken teleportation circle looks like?”

“I may be nothing more than a thief, but I am somewhat educated.”

You all begin searching around, and eventually, Caleb finds a journal written in Draconic. As you discuss it, the temperature drops and a skeletal form stretches from the group, ghastly skin stretched over its face.

“My secrets are yours.”

After that, you and the Nein launch into battle, and shockingly, you all fight very well together, working in sync.

You watched Jester sink to the ground, your own head pounding from the mental attacks. Molly charged at the undead Siff Dunder, and you shouted “Finish this Mollymauk!” as you ran towards Jester, giving her a healing potion you kept in your pocket.

The temperature drops again, cold energy emerging from a bookshelf. You can physically see Caleb remembering something, his eyes lighting. He mentions a physical form, like will o’ wisps and you swear under your breath as a series of attacks knocks Yasha unconscious. Jester is by her side instantly, healing her, before she and Beauregard pull down the bookshelf.

A large urn stands amongst pots and small cases, and Molly reaches through and destroys the urn. Siff, who was just attacking you and Fjord as you tried to distract it, disintegrates, and you both breathe a sigh of relief.

You all take a bit of time to collect yourself, and Fjord once again sits beside you, “Alright, I need to know. Why no last name?”

“Never got one.” You said, drinking from your waterskin and checking for any injuries.

“Orphan?”

“Yeah”

You notice a flash of something like sympathy on his face, and but in “I don’t need your pity. I’m perfectly fine without parents.”

“I was gonna say me too.”

You look at Fjord, “Right, sorry.”

Fjord looks like he’s about to ask another question, but you’re interrupted by Nott rubbing oil on herself and squeezing through the hole. Yasha just breaks the wall.

Why was that hot? You think to yourself

You see Nott bent over a case with her thieves tools out, trying to open a lock. Two minutes pass and you hear a gas leak and repeated coughing. “Poison,” she croaks, handing out the jewelry she found, even handing you a piece.

Beauregard searches through the urns, finding a spellbook, which she gives to Caleb. He traces some pattern in the air and finishes the spell, looking around the room. Your back is turned, but he gives you a look, nodding at Beau. You’re definitely hiding abilities other than the rouge ones you’ve displayed.

He points out a sword called the Magicians Judge, which Yasha takes. Molly, Jester, Fjord, and Beau leave to investigate further down the river, while you make camp with Caleb and Nott.

“You know magic,” Caleb says after a long stretch of silence. “How?”

A simple question, but you were reluctant to answer, Fjord already knows too much about you. “I stole some books off of a travelling wizard when I was 15. I was going to sell them, but they seemed interesting, so I taught myself.”

“How old are you?” Nott asked in between sips of her flask.

“23.” You answer, resting your head on your bag.

“What spells do you know?”

“Just a few illusions. Makes thievin’ easier.”

The interrogation seemed to stop then, and a few minutes later, the others return, and you all fall asleep.

You dream of being chased through Alfeild after stealing the books. You ran and ran, jumping on carriages until you deemed yourself far enough away. Late nights of learning magic, trying to get a hold on precious components with no money. Slowly learning.

When you woke up, you realized you shouldn’t have slept around strangers, your true form peeking through. You shift slowly back, keeping your cloak wrapped around you.

“Fjord, you have a little something right here.” Jester says, pointing out the dried blood on the corner of his mouth.”

“Oh, yeah, I grind my teeth,” Fjord explains blushing slightly as he wipes it. As he does you notice his tusks are shorter than other half-orcs you’ve seen.

Jester notices it too and starts questioning him about them. Fjord gets nervous and says “When I was younger, they used to make fun of my teeth, so I got rid of the target.”

“The kids at the orphanage?” You ground out, all too familiar with asshole kids

“Yeah, it just kinda became a habit.”

“Did you ever kill them?” Yasha asked, looking very serious,

Nott quickly became concerned “Yasha. Have you ever killed a kid?”

No answer.

Immediately, the Mighty Nein promised that if he grew them out they’d support him. You had a moment then. These people hadn’t known each other long, minus a couple of obvious pairings, but you could tell they were good people. Certainly better than the Gentleman’s goons.

You all make your way up to the Gentleman’s lair, keeping quiet. You’re lost in thought, right up until you take the blindfold off of the Nein. You pull Fjord aside before he gets to the Gentleman.

“I still have to talk to the Boss about it, but would it be alright if I maybe tagged along with you guys for a bit? You seem like good people, and I think I need a change of company.”

“I’d have to talk to the other, but I don’t have a problem with it. You’re a good fighter Y/N, we could definitely use you.”

You nod and wait for the Mighty Nein to finish the meeting with the Gentleman before you sit down with him.

“Hey, Boss?” You say, waiting for permission to speak, “I was thinking, I might try travelling around a bit. I’ve never been good at staying in one place, you know my past. And those Migh-”

The Gentleman held up a hand, and you felt the entire bar fall silent. He was going to say no, you knew it.

“Y/N, you’ve been my best employee for the last several years. Your talents are unmatchable, and I don’t think I’ll ever find a replacement. But I get it. A change of pace is always needed. Go pack up your things, and don’t worry about your bar tab, I’ll pay.” He slid a pouch of gold across the table, “Here’s a little something to start you off.”

Holy shit.

“Thank you, sir.”

The Gentleman nodded, and you ran to pack your things. Fjord said something about the Leaky Tap, so you headed over. Right away, Jester threw her arms around you.

“Welcome to the Mighty Nein!”

#mighty nein x reader #mighty nein #jester lavorre #fjord stone #beauregard lionett #caleb widogast #mollymauk tealeaf #nott the brave #Change With The Tides #fanfiction #Critical role #this wasn't supposed to be so long

[saphirered]

I thought this would be an interesting twist: After the failed ritual, what if Lucien's s/o ran into Molly? Thank you!

Okay so this one came out quicker than I expected 😅. Little 'twist' at the end because I could not help myself. I hope you enjoy it! 😘

You warned him. You warned him so many times but he wouldn’t bloody listen. Too caught up in his own game for power, never satisfied. But what were you supposed to do? Stop him? No, you’d never. You loved him more than that but you were not prepared to follow him to his own death. Lucien, you idiot how could you? You tried everything but he didn’t come back. The ritual failed. You didn’t want to uphold your part of the bargain. You knew this mage had ulterior motives and after being granted a peak of those pages she wouldn’t back down.

The woman wanted it all for herself and Lucien stood between her and that power the Eyes of Nine had to offer. Knowing the Tombtakers would follow Lucien to the extremes they would also accept the risks of this ritual and would be content but disappointed should it fail. With what you had seen you knew it shouldn’t fail. You had warned Lucien of your suspicions but his own arrogance made him blind to the consequences of this all. He wouldn’t listen and you were becoming an obstacle so when the ritual was to go down you weren’t there.

Lucien has slipped away from your warm embrace in the dead of night to perform the ritual and of course Vess messed with it, assuring he wouldn’t be able to return to his body therefor as per the agreement, she’d take the book as payment. It was too late when you found him, already dead. No amount of healing or revivification could bring him back to you. You had to accept that but you could enact revenge on the bitch that took him away from you. You’ll have her wishing she was the one in a shallow grave instead.

The Tombtakers diverged, finding their own paths. Cree tried to take you with her but you wouldn’t. You had your own task to complete. After that you could rest. Making the arrangements, finding allies where you could, earning and cashing in favours from anyone of power or resources you could left you with quite the arsenal at your disposal but you couldn’t just walk into the capital of the Dwendalian Empire and murder one of the archmages of the Cerberus Assembly. You had to be patient, lay low and let everyone think you moved on.

Still you visited the grave whenever you could. There was a comfort in the hope that maybe, wherever he was he could hear you. Lucien would probably scold you for going on a revenge path against one of the most powerful magic users on the continent all by your lonesome. He’s one to talk. Nevermind, you told him about your adventures, and hoping to acquire the resources to attempt to bring him back. You won’t give up hope.

Then you returned, returned to find the grave empty. You followed the tracks but they lead you nowhere. You had to find him. You had to find Lucien before anyone else did because what might they do? What state would he be in? Does this mean he’s already ascended? Would this mean he’d truly fully become the Nonagon for once and for all? But most of all, you just want him back in your arms knowing he’d be safe. You’d scour Exandria to find him.

There you are standing in a dark alleyway, hood blocking direct view of your face as you’re quite literally in the middle of a back alley deal. You’re no stranger to the shady business and shady people can most often be found in these places. You pay your contact in exchange for the information your requested, satisfied with the results. You hear commotion on the main street. Guards. Parting from your contact you wait for the guards to pass. That’s when you notice a lavender tiefling bolt past you. A very familiar lavender tiefling.

Confusion, relief, heartache, panic, happiness, disappointment, a wave of emotion hits you in a way you’re not even sure how you’re supposed to feel at this point. Many questions accompany those feelings. What are you supposed to do? Well, go after him of course! If Lucien’s back and he’s being chased by guards, that’s not a good thing for the current situation. Sticking to the shadows you trail along. Lucien may just have lost his touch but perhaps the city is an unfamiliar one to him and alone, he doesn’t know the way. The tattoos are new, so are the rather colourful clothes but you know he never does anything without reason.

You figure out where he’s going, the direction at least and from your own past encounters here you know the side alleys. You take a path that should have you end up ahead of him. You’ll have to take a few rooftops and private yards but it’s the quickest and you’ve done it plenty of times. Once you get in place you take off your cloak, get ready. You hear the guards shouting for reinforcements. The closer he gets from around the corner you can see the smug grin filled with mischief as he runs. You’ve missed that one.

The moment comes and you grab onto him as he passes pulling him into the alley with you, wrapping your cloak around him and pulling the hood up. Hands on both sides of his face you look at him closely. There’s confusion in his eyes as they focus on you. He’s already out of breath but you pull him into a deep kiss. Lucien hits the wall behind him and readjusts the hood of the cloak to keep his face covered. The response to the kiss only comes with the sound of the guards drawing near and is very confused. The guards pass by. They glance into the alley but awkwardly turn back to following the street upon seeing the two of you together.

As soon as they’re gone Mollymauk breaks away from you. He’s breathing heavily more from the run than the kiss you shared. He’s very confused. Indifferent to being kissed by a stranger, this… unexpected to say the least. He’s got no idea who you are but you saved his ass so you’re alright in his books at the moment. That doesn’t mean he’s not wary of you. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out you know him, or well whoever he used to be and with the conflicting emotions running through you he’ll have to think fast to spin his bullshit correctly.

“You have no idea how happy I am you’re alive. Does this mean it worked after all? Did you succeed?” You run your thumbs over Lucien’s cheekbones as he holds onto your wrists lightly. The pressure in your chest grows heavier as you await his answer.

“It did. I did. It didn’t go as planned but I’m here now.” Molly works his charm like his life depends on it because he entertains the thought it might. Your touch, there’s something eerily familiar about it, akin to being reminded of a distant long forgotten dream. Hazy but it feels real. He still has no idea who you are and there’s no bells ringing either. While he much rather run far away avoiding any and all connections to a past not his, he cannot help but commend whoever came before him. The one that got buried definitely had a good taste in lovers? Friends? Molly’s not going to assume even though you kissed him quite passionately.

Your chest clenches and it feels as if your breath won’t leave your body, your blood stopping in your veins, like you got hit by an extra dimensional force attempting to pull everything away from you. You listen to Lucien’s words. It looks like him but why do you feel like you hear someone else? It’s not an illusion or some trick you’re sure. If it were your enemies would have known to pick a better imposter and you’d have been dead already. Your own mind fights against this train of thought, justifying it. Lucien had been dead for weeks until you found the empty grave. Of course there were bound to be side effects or even consequences to the ritual. But then again, it had been two years since then. Two years to recover from whatever happened…

“You don’t know me, do you?” Speaking the words out loud breaks your heart. You don’t fight the pain they cause. There’s no tears. You’ve already grieved Lucien once. You’re not doing it again. This will be nothing more than a painful reminder, a cruel joke from the gods behind the divine gate. Why must the fates torture you so for nothing more than loving an ambitious man reaching for the stars and beyond?

“No. I’m sorry.” Molly can’t help but feel your pain. It’s clear you cared a great amount about his predecessor, the way you speak reveals intense heartbreak at the passing of that one. It also shows acceptance that whoever he used to be is gone and you’ve come to terms with that a while ago. That’s enough for him to recognise you won’t hurt him. Molly had never felt sorry for the death of who he used to be and he won’t start now but he does feel sorry for you. This whole situation is messed up.

You close your eyes and nod, dropping your hands and take a step back. No matter how much your heart may tell you to be close to this tiefling, your mind knows it’s not Lucien. You cannot in good conscious hang onto whatever remains. It’s not fair you him, to Lucien but most of all not fair to yourself. Do you wish it was Lucien standing here in front of you? Of course you do. You’d do anything to get him back but what would directing all your pain achieve directed at this new person in the same body? It would accomplish nothing but more pain. You can’t imagine this tiefling in front of you doesn’t have any friends, loved ones, people who care about him. You weren’t going to put you don’t know how many others through the same pain you’ve been put through.

“I am as much of a ghost of the past to you as you are to me.” You’ve come to the conclusion that based of his responses there may not be any recognition, there is an unknown familiarity to you on his end. Perhaps the final slivers of Lucien remaining but nothing more than a fleeting memory. A hand reaches out for yours. You allow him to take your hand and he rubs circles in the back of it with his thumb in an attempt to bring you some comfort. It’s a gesture out of kindness. Not out of selfish intent or with the expectancy to get something out of it, like Lucien would when faced with a stranger he clearly had the upper hand over.

“You seem to have cared for my predecessor, Lucien, quite a lot. I truly am sorry.” You offer him a saddened smile as a silent thank you. He knows Lucien’s name so he must have learned something of the past. You gather it hasn’t been much and most definitely is second hand knowledge by his lack of information on the ritual, who he used to be, everything really.

“You know his name?” The sentence is voiced somewhere in between a question and a statement.

“A blood cleric named Cree. She ran into us-me and mistook me for him. I played along but I don’t think she really bought it. She didn’t reveal much.” The name of the tabaxi alone is enough to make your blood boil. If Cree had known for however long, why hadn’t she gotten in contact with you? You know exactly why and are debating wether or not you could do with a new fur rug. You also acknowledge that Cree is a risk and this new-not Lucien will have to watch his back.

“Since you’re not Lucien nor do you seem to be using that name, what do I call you?”

“Mollymauk Tealeaf or simply Molly to my friends.” The tiefling-Mollymauk smiles at you, a genuine smile. You have to appreciate the small gestures of comfort and kindness.

“I would give you my own name but for both of our sakes I won’t. You may refer to me as an old friend. I know I have no right to but may I ask you a favour?”

Mollymauk nods. As always he leaves a place better than he found it, tries to bring joy and happiness wherever he can even if that means making a fool of himself. Very few times has he been faced with someone who needs his help as much as you do. While there’s definitely limits to what he can provide, you deserve some compassion. Especially after the shitty cards life had dealt to you. He’ll try to ease that if he can.

“May I- May I ask you to tell me about your life, Mollymauk?” Not the request he expected. Then again, to be fair he didn’t really know what to expect. A kiss maybe? Stick along for a while? Perhaps even a final goodbye so you could close this chapter once and for all? But of all the things you asked about him. Not Lucien. Him.

“It’s a long story…” Molly drifts off reminiscing the wild ride of the past two years, especially the events of the last few months upon joining the Mighty Nein and the adventures they had already gone on; were currently on but if you really wanted to hear all about that, he’d tell you.

“I have plenty of time. How about we walk and talk? Get you back to your traveling companions? Your friends? And if there’s still plenty more to tell, if you want to you can tell me over a few drinks. My treat.” You feel within yourself you’d better be able to let go knowing this Mollymauk is happy and lives content. Lucien might be gone but Mollymauk deserves a good life free of Lucien’s burdens. You’ll do what you can to assure that.

“Never tell a story for free. That sounds like a good deal.” Molly offers you his arm and when you hesitate, expects you not to take it but to his surprise you do. There’s something strangely comforting about the whole ordeal. You’re both strangers to each other but it still feels like you have known each other for years.

On your way to where Mollymauk is staying he feels no need to hold back or deceive and instead tells you what happened to him; how he woke up, dug himself out of a grave and was found by a kind man, joined the circus, became a fortune teller, made friends along the way, found a family, many tales of the mischief he was up to, leaving every place better than he found it. You had some good laughs and were able to ask some questions throughout. All in all you came to the conclusion Mollymauk’s life hasn’t been an easy one but it was a good one and he was happy.

Then he found this group of strangers in a tavern somewhere in Trostenwald. His old family was torn away in the wreckage of a devil toad but he found a new one in these strangers. The Mighty Nein. Their time together has been but a few months but they already feel like family and he’d do anything for them. They might be assholes but they’re good people.

You got to meet them. Molly- as he keeps insisting because you are his friend now, introduced you to this Mighty Nein as he thought it best you heard some of these stories from their mouths too for the sake of perspective. He introduced you to them as such; an old friend from the past. The details were left blurry but Molly’s confidence was enough to leave them at the very least accepting and not mistrusting you. They shared their stories with you. They needed him. They may have come far from the assholes they were, but they still had a ways to go. You knew you could not tear that away from him nor did you feel right to join them, even if temporarily.

It’s time for you to say goodbye. You bid your farewell to the Mighty Nein and while they would ask you to stay just a little longer, you know you cannot. You will not insert yourself into their lives based on the merits of your own lies and life. They are free so let them be free. Molly walks you out so you may have one final conversation before you leave his world behind you.

“You don’t have to go yet. They enjoy your company and honestly, they could learn a thing or two from you.” Molly offers as you stand outside of the tavern, the sky since having grown dark and the stars out. The air is cool, winter is drawing near, before you know it the frost will stick to the ground and you’ll be back in Shadycreek plotting the demise of a certain Cerberus Assembly member. You’ll have to leave this all behind.

“You know I can’t. For all of our sakes.” You offer Molly a smile. You’re happy with what you got to see, the stories you were told but this is where it ends and that’s okay. Molly knows it too. Sometimes it’s better to let go than to hang on. You have your own life just as he has his.

“So I guess this is goodbye then.” Molly takes hold of both of your hands and squeezes lightly before he pulls you in for a hug. You return the embrace. Pulling apart enough to look him in the eyes you stroke his cheek, tracing the tattoos fanning up his neck and jaw.

“I am still but a ghost of the past. A ghost I will remain. I wish you a good life, Mollymauk Tealeaf. May we one day meet again.” You kiss his cheek and despite the appearance of Lucien, it doesn’t feel the same. Despite how it may sound, you’re happy it doesn’t. You step out of Molly’s arms.

“May we meet again.” The words Molly speaks are like a breath upon the wind as you walk backwards, one final look at the lavender tiefling as you blend into the darkness, fading like a ghost.

There may be many more things Molly would like to ask you. He’d like to get to know you and the thought that maybe one day he might, sounds like a good day in his mind. You have your own business to take care of first but maybe one day you will meet again. For now a ghost of the past he doesn’t recall you will remain…

——————

But a few months later you find your way back on the road to Shadycreek Run. There you found a grave marker along the Glory Run Road… The marker held a colourful ostentatious red coat embellished to the nines. It appears to have been left to the weather for some time but you recognise it. Hit with a sense of dread you approach the grave already knowing who it belongs to. The least you can do is pay your final respects to the friend you never got to know more.

You dismount your horse guiding it the reins closer to the marker. That’s definitely Molly’s coat. There’s no denying that now. You walk further up the hill offering a silent prayer to the Moonweaver who Molly admitted to being a follower of.

Approaching the grave you see it dug up. You expect grave robbers, thieves of some kind as you brush your fingers over the fabric of the coat. You get a glance of the grave and see it empty instead. Not robbed; empty. No body, nothing but the marker and the coat. Down the other side of the hill you see a figure, a lavender tiefling, tapestry draped around him watching the skies. The back is turned to you so the tiefling doesn’t see you. A wave of both relieve and dread washes over you as you are met with your own ghost of the past.

#critical role x reader #critrole x reader #critical role #mighty nein x reader #mighty nein #mollymauk x reader #lucien x reader

[mollysfoundfamily]

What are the epithet erased folks like when they're drunked?

Oh ho ho ho this is going to be fun! ( alcohol and drunk Tigger warning though)

Molly: No. No. No. No. no alcohol for the baby. EVER! Percy doesn’t even anything that even looks like it get close to her and her young still forming brain!! the others have kind of an unspoken rule about it to. SHES. JUST. TOO. PURE.

she hasn’t told them that her dad used to let her drink pumpkin spice beer at thanksgiving yet.

Sylvie: Don’t tell percy but Sylvie drinks wine the most respectable and classy of all adult beverages when he’s at office parties. The others are reluctant to let a 15 year old do it but he insists he‘s more then responsible enough. It’s purely to study the complex flavors anyway (he’ll never admit it but they all taste like expired cough syrup to him) not to get totally inebriated for the sake of it.... that part happened on accident. It only takes about one glass to do it and He goes into beef beef sheep mode but as a drunken out loud ramble. He comes up with alot of “ground braking theories“ when he gets like this too. He was once convinced that motion wasn’t real it‘s just an illusion our brains cook up to help us cope with our frozen world!!! He’ll just keep rambling and hiccuping for hours every once and a while admitting something very very embarrassing like How he doesn’t know what half the big words he uses mean or that his coffee is actually just chocolate milk until he eventually passes out on top of a pile of very tipsy sheep sucking his thumb.... which is usually fallowed by a visit from a very very glitchy beefton Who has fish fins for some reason because drunk dreams apparently aren’t as stable as regular dreams.

Giovanni: Gio doesn’t even really like alcohol (mostly because of Debby) but sneaks into bars every now and then because underage drinking is a major crime!! He can’t stomach anything unless it’s drowned in sweet strawberry staved ice or a million different juices and of course a tiny umbrella and it only takes one of those to get him waisted... His whole face flushes totally red even his ears! He’s somehow even louder and more obnoxious then usual! Dancing on tables swinging form ceiling fans yelling at strangers who don’t tip or harass The bar tenders and getting into fist fights with them which he usually loses (making out with crusher that one time) his few inhibitions completely out the window along with the Bar‘s jukebox.... it’s the only time he’s ever committed any kind of real crimes. Then on the second on he just Starts maniacally laughing and crying at the same time. Its actually pretty scary to witness so thank goodness Bear trap ain’t around. Until It eventually just becomes crying about all the mean stuff he did and how great it is but how it’s awful too and how he doesn’t wanna be mean but you have to be mean to be a bad guy so does that mean he doesn’t wanna be a bad guy? and really feels like he should have taken that four year baseball scholarship to the city’s top medical College!!

Mera: She’s a little harder to get waisted mostly Because she has to be really careful not to brake the fancy glasses her drinks come in. When she does it only makes her get more grumpy and makes her start scream ranting about how terrible life is and how terrible people are and just how much everything and everyone sucks all the time... expect for Indus

her affection for him is turned up a hundred fold she’ll throw herself on top of him and nuzzle into him like a kitty squeezing his muscles! She’ll ramble on about how he’s the handsomest sweetest person in the history of ever and how she doesn’t deserve him and just wants to kiss his big dumb face and from there it trails off into.... pg 13 territory untill she passes out and a very red faced indus has to carry her home.

Indus: Indus is also pretty hard to get drunk since he’s so huge it’s only ever happened once. It was from one to many of those wooden pints of ale at this theme bar because of course it was. Everyone there thought he was an actor or something and kept asking for selfies because he kept singing broken warrior drinking ballets and challenging people to drinking contests which only made things worse. After winning about 5 he couldn’t say too words without braking into giggle fit or hiccuping his head off. It would have been kinda cute if he hadn’t also lost all motor control, completely forgot how strong he was and smashed almost everything and everyone he came in contact with. He hugged about 7 people into the hospital, smashed a hole on the bar. and then tried to fight a forklift. But he probably would have done that last one anyway.

Percy: (aka the one you’re all waiting for) Has only ever taken a drink once in her life. Ramsey thought Champagne would be a good way to celebrate after closing a big case together... he has never regretted anything so much. She took one sip and she was immediately completely intoxicated a Drunken delinquent unable to control her own actions or the already rapidly forming addition she was suffering from. But she would work as hard as she could to get sober and decided to check herself into the nearest rehab center. He tried to stop her but she was determined to go strait there but she wouldn’t allow herself to operate a motor vehicle under such conditions so she decided to walk there right through the middle of heavy traffic. Once again totally unable to control her rash decisions. He eventually got her to come back thankfully without getting hit. Only for her to run straight into a stop sign. She got back up again immediately and acted like nothing was wrong even though blood was pooring out of her swelled up nose! He tried to take her to the hospital but she insisted on staying to defend her honor again the offending sign as irrational displays of strength was a common drunken activity. But electrocuting it was probably not the best idea since it sort of acted as a lightning rod and fired the underground wires the ran underneath it blacking out the next 5 city blocks. The video of the whole thing when viral and Percy uses as an example of the dangers of alcohol For the kids.

Ramsey: The man can afford freaking gold laced Champagne but chooses box rosé in the basement watching Adam Sandler movies like the king he is.

But somehow with out fail he will always always always wake up the next morning in the master sweet of a yacht he just bought with a bunch of passed out strangers half of which are furries in a giant pile of money totally unable to move his face because of the back ally Botox he got done. wearing nothing but his boxers, gold chains with a little gold rats on them, and solid gold crocks still holding that box of rosé....

Zora: We’ve done drunk Zora art here before she’s pretty much exactly what you would expect downing whisky and beer left and right just to see how far she can go!! Her competitiveness goes through the roof and she’s challenging anyone to anything darts, arm wrestle, poole, russian roulette, jump rope, anything she was one of the said people Indus got into a drinking contest with and the only one he lost too! She really isn’t that much different then her usual self since she drinks pretty regularly and has the highest tolerance out of everyone.

extra because I had too!!

Howie: It seems like its impossible to get him drunk. His worker bees get him to try and loosen up a little because like it or not he needs it. But he’s already downed 10 giant beers and seems totally the same.... until he gets a call about a new job gets up and walks right through the wall of the bar leaving a Howie shaped hole behind him.

#epithet erased #Epithet Erased Headcannon #Headcannon #Found Fam #Alcohol Trigger warning #molly blyndeff #giovanni potage #sylvester ashling #mera salamin #indus tarbella #percival king #ramsey murdoch #zora salazar #howie honeyglow

[stxrrywildflower]

this town {g.w.}

pairing - george weasley x reader

summary - you introduce george to one of your favorite songs

warnings - none

this fic includes the use of modern technology

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

being a muggle-born, you usually spent summers back home with your family.

during that time, you were able to see your friends and extended family as well as do your usual ‘muggle activities’ as you usually called them.

your favorite part of all, however, was finally being able to catch up on all the music released throughout the year. you were almost cut off from the muggle world at hogwarts, and the time off allowed you to finally listen to what you were missing.

in the first few days off of school, you listened to as much music as possible. when you could, you wanted to show fred and george everything.

the three of you were going into your final year at hogwarts. naturally, you wanted to spend more time together; more specifically you and george for obvious reasons.

molly had extended the invite for you to spend the summer at the burrow. harry and hermione were joining the family as well, and she thought it would be sweet to invite you as well. you fit right in with the family, between getting along with everyone right down to making george ‘‘the happiest molly has ever seen him.”

after thoroughly explaining everything they needed to hear, your parents had finally agreed.

george greeted you in the field outside of his family home when you finally arrived, immediately enveloping you in a hug. “i’ve missed you so much sweetheart.”

“it’s been four days george,” you commented, though you weren’t exactly complaining.

“so? can’t i miss my girlfriend?”  he spoke, adding on a hurt tone.

you pulled back first, hand moving up to cup his cheek. “i’m sorry george, i missed you too,” you beamed. he leaned down to kiss you deeply, only stopping moments later from the sound of footsteps.

“hey hey hey,” fred interrupted. “you have all summer to do that.”

you shifted away from george with a light blush on your face, allowing the boys to pick up your bags so you could head inside. “where are your parents?” you asked.

“out getting hermione and harry,” george answered. “so we got the house to ourselves.”

fred gagged in the back. “get your mind out of the gutter fred,” you rolled your eyes. “i don’t think i can after george’s innuendo.”

george finally had enough of your arguing and spoke up again. “since we have no one to criticize us, why don’t we work on those fireworks?”

↓

george snuck into your room almost immediately after dinner that night. he stopped abruptly right before entering, mouth agap and nearly frozen in place.

“close your mouth georgie, you know what molly says about the flies,” you teased.

“what’s that?”

you met george’s eyes, a slight smile forming at how much his expression matched a little kid on christmas.

it was no secret the weasley boys loved any muggle items arthur usually collected. the twins usually tinkered with them for their latest pranks. you never had the heart to tell any of them the true meanings or how they really worked.

“this is a smartphone, my mom let me bring it before school starts up,” you explained, patting the spot beside you on your bed for him to sit. “it’s how we basically communicate in the muggle world. we use it to talk, play games, music,” you rambled off.

“music?” george spoke.

you nodded. “yeah there’s different programs we can use. do you want to here some?”

george settled further on the bed, leaning close to you as you opened up your music service.

“this one is called ‘this town.’ it’s my absolute favorite song,” you added. “really?”

“yeah, it’s always been a dream to dance to this.”

a lightbulb went off in george’s head, though he managed to keep his reaction minimal. you let the song play through your phone speakers, a gentle smile forming right away.

george had a lot of planning to do.

_____

you were back in your room a few nights later. george was tucked firmly in your side, letting his head rest in the crook of your neck so your hand could run through his newly short hair.

“i kinda miss your long hair,” you spoke.

george brought his head up to meet your gaze. “i thought you hated my long locks,” he retaliated.

“i could never.”

“come on,” george tugged, standing up abruptly to pull you from the bed. “let’s go outside.”

“outside? george it’s pouring rain.”

your boyfriend huffed before shifting his facial expression into one you knew would get you. “alright fine,” you soon agreed.

without another word, george grabbed your hand to lead you out of the room and through the hallways. you had to be more quiet as it was fairly late at night and people were already starting to turn in.

“and why are we going outside?”

“it’s a surprise,” george answered. you mentally rolled your eyes, you should have known.

it took you a few minutes to get down to the base floor and george didn’t let a single clue go the entire time.

he stopped by the back door, opening it up and guiding you out by placing his hand on the small of your back.

“you didn’t,” you immediately spoke.

george raised on eyebrow with a grin. “oh i did.”

towards the middle of the field, george had set up a gazebo tent with various string lights twirled around the legs and up into the top. “isn’t that a fire hazard with the rain?”

george stopped dead in his tracks. you looked towards him, awaiting an answer to calm your concerns.

“i’ve already planned for that, we’re fully safe under here,” with that, he placed a gentle kiss to your nose.

you made your way through the field, occasionally jumping in the puddles you passed by. you were incredibly thankful george hadn’t told you to wear shoes.

the two of you finally made it to the tent. the rain poured through the top giving the illusion that the lights were the only thing surrounding you.

“dad helped me set it up,” george explained. “he’s been tinkering with some muggle speakers and finally got them working.”

“speakers? for what?”

george let go of your hand to pull out his wand. with one quick swoosh and a mutter of a spell, music slowly poured out. within just a few seconds, you recognized it as the song you had shown him just a few days before.

“now, may i have this dance?” he extended one hand out.

you bit your lip to hold back a giggle. the whole concept itself wanted to make you cry; dancing in the rain with the person you loved was becoming a dream come true.

you swayed back and forth, focusing on your movements.

george kept one hand on your waist, the other out to the side to interlock with yours. you let your head fall against his chest, focusing on the vibrations of his chest. his lips occasionally fell to place a kiss to your head.

“are you humming?” you inquired.

george let out a light laugh. "i love this song.”

you pressed your head further into his chest to hide your smile.

the rain continued to pour down around the two of you. after awhile, you forgot about it. you were already soaking wet after all.

you recognized the ending of the song begining and frowned. just one nearly four minute song felt like it went by way too fast.

if you were being honest, you didn’t want it to end.

but alas, the chords of the song were soon replaced by the continuous fall of the rain.

neither of you moved from your hold, choosing to savor the time together.

“thank you for this,” you spoke quietly.

george ducked down to press his lips to your temple, cutting through the rain for the simple gesture. “always, love.”

#harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fanfic #george weasley #george weasley x reader #george weasley x y/n #george weasley fanfiction #george weasley fluff #the weasley twins #fred and george #gryffindor

[cadaceus]

C2E141

One last time, y’all. This campaign and these characters have meant so much to me, and this seven hour finale was definitely an emotional rollercoaster. (Yes, I shed actual tears at one point, which rarely happens to me with media. But this is a special occasion.) These liveblogs are nearly as long as the episode itself, so grab a snack! With that being said, here are my very last liveblogs for Campaign 2 of Critical Role. As always, major spoilers below, so beware. 

- Veth taking a level in Wizard, god I am really gonna cry ten minutes into this thing...  😭

- We got our first “stay with us” to Essek, I am emo...

- I was fully not expecting to say goodbye to Frumpkin, but now I’m on the verge of tears... farewell dear fey friend (Marisha saying “that wasn’t supposed to be what broke me” me too me too)

- “You’re a good person.” “I could be.” “You are.”

- “I think you’re a good person” I never thought that I’d hear Beau say that about Essek and this genuinely might be what breaks me... she thinks he’s a good person.... redemption is possible.... maybe love is real....

- If I end up crying over wizards, look away

- Jester lifting up Fjord’s arm to snuggle beneath it made me say “awww” out loud  🥺

- VETH GOING FOR A DIP IN THE POND, I AM GENUINELY SO PROUD OF HER

- “Aahhh!! It’s me! Your wife!” I am going to miss Jester’s sending so much

- Okay that accent bit was so funny, I am going to miss all of them so much

- REAL MOLLY IS BACK REAL MOLLY IS BACK REAL MOLLY IS BACK

- Oh but he doesn’t remember them... and Yasha is trying so hard to help him remember, it’s so so sweet 

- Something about the way he said “Tealeaf’s nice” made me tear up... I was neutral on Mollymauk early campaign because I went into things knowing that he passed away, but this whole conversation with the Mighty Nein is So Much. Also “Kingsley Tealeaf” 

- “Everyone should have a brother” as someone with three of them, I vouch for this  🥺

- a) I love Marion Lavorre (and Jester ofc!) so very much and b) I can’t believe that Jester’s parent trap actually worked??

- “I do not think Exandria is ready for how you’re going to change it” got to me... and it’s also so true. jester has already changed the world just by being kind.

- Good bye Marion... I love and will miss you so much! (And many thanks to Laura and Matt for creating an agoraphic single mother who raised a wonderful child <3)

- Beau and Jester teasing Marion for having a complicated relationship with Babenon reminds me of Caleb saying he has a complicated relationship with Essek...

- LEAVE CALEB ALON E FUOIKJLKGKNL 

- THIS IS ....... SO MUCH WORSE THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.

- Caleb’s biggest trauma(s) coming back to haunt him, I am genuinely going to cry I’m not ready for this I’m not okay

- Beau saying to Jester “Thanks, cutie” I love themmmmm

- INITIATIVE AAGJASKHDKJ AAAAAHHHH

- Essek’s Gravity Sinkhole did nothing? uhhhhh Mr Stark...

- EADWULF???? HELLO?????

- Essek using his entire turn to save Caleb last battle 🤝 Caleb using his entire turn to save Essek this battle

- ASTRID???? I TRUSTED YOU??? WE ALL TRUSTED YOU????

- Another Counterspell chain sdfdghjkdl wizards !!!

- “It’s just business” is literally the Neutral Evil line, it always gives me chills when any character says it

- This hurts more after Liam confirming on Twitter that Astrid/Caleb/Eadwulf were all three a romantic item... please stop hurting Caleb, you loved him  😭

- THE FJORD VS EADWULF SWORD FIGHT IS SO CINEMATIC I LOVE IT HERE ACTUALLY

- Essek taking every opportunity to pull Caleb to safety makes me so emotional...  😭

- “You’re not the first student I’ve had to put down” I am burning with my anger for you, old man 

- THE DISPEL WORKED LET’S GO CALEB.....

- Remember when Matt said that Essek doesn’t openly show concern/emotion? And now he’s saying “I’m scared” in front of his closest friends and his worst enemies.... growth my love.....

- BEAU AND VETH LETS GO CHAOS CREW LETS MF GO BABEYYYY!!!

- FJORD COUNTERSPELLING THE DIMENSION DOOR..... and Matt having him describe it.... is this taking the place of a “HDYWTDT” *eyes emoji*

- CALEB GOING DOWN NO, THANK GOD FOR THAT DEATH WARD

- Veth’s illusion of Caleb’s parents flanking Caleb in the flames.... that got me too, Liam

- “Stay down.” yeah, okay, that was sexy

- ASTRID BEING THE ONE TO ACTIVATE THE COLLAR IS LITERALLY POETIC JUSTICE... Trent being beaten by the student who stuck with him longest I love this so much, she deserved that moment honestly

- Break Time, AKA Emma Makes Her Weekly Mug Brownie Interlude

- Sometimes I feel like “death is too good for you” is a copout, but in this case it fits so well, I want this mf’s reputation destroyed and the entire operation exposed and overthrown let’s goooo

- “I loved you both so much”.... Astrid and Eadwulf walking away.... oh, Blumendrei... I know this is not the end of your story. What’s past is prologue, loves

- The Empire Siblings are gonna burn down the whole system because it’s the system that enables individual corruption... I am so fulfilled by this, god i love them

- “I love you too” OH MY GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH, FJORESTER ARE THE CUTEST FOR REAL

- Jester and Essek’s friendship still means so much to me btw just in case anyone wanted a check-in

- Veth giving the flask to Kingsley!! Good for her, good for her!

- OH Blumenduo are back already! I truly thought that was going to be their last appearance of the Campaign, why is this taking me more by surprise than Trent’s appearance

- “[Caleb] notes how similar Eadwulf and Fjord are” this is Widofjord adjacent... this episode we have gotten Widomauk-adjacent, Widojest-adjacent, and Widofjord-adjacent (and Blumentrio ofc), now come through Shadowgast and we can get a full Bingo on the “Bisexual Maelstrom” card

- Speaking of relationships, I am lowkey into the Fjord/Jester/Kingsley dynamic LOL no one look at me I’m in hiding

- I’M NOT READY TO SAY GOODBYE TO VETH AND CAD 😭 It makes sense and the fact that they have their families back is beautiful but also consider this: I’m sad and I will miss them 

- The goodbyes to Caduceus..... I am going to cry aren’t I?

- “If he’s anything like his mom, you won’t see him until it’s too late” Okay that made me giggle, I love Veth and I love Luc and I love their little family

- IS ESSEK LEAVING TOO? THAT’S GONNA BE WHAT BREAKS ME ISN’T IT

- If Essek leaves and we never see him again, getting a triple whammy of goodbyes I will be so incredibly sad, I cannot do this  😭

- If anyone is interested, no I am not doing well

- I was lowkey ready to get an Essek’s feelings for Caleb confirmation tonight, I guess it makes sense that we didn’t but I hope that this is not the last time we see Essek... I want to write another emo post about him and about how much he means to me but I will refrain

- CALEB BEING A TEACHER IS THE ENDGAME I WANT FOR HIM PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

- Wow, I really was not ready to see Caduceus and Essek go for some reason... I really wanted this Campaign to end on the image of the Mighty Nein together as all nine of them... I’m feeling so numb right now having to say goodbye  😭

- Oh, we’re in the epilogue now!

- When Fjord said “[the sea] is my favorite place to be” I genuinely felt that on a spiritual level... the ocean is home, it truly is and always will be for me as well

- “I CAST MODIFY MEMORY” FJORD LMAOOOOOOO

- Okay, that Widobrave ending is what made me shed tears for the first time this episode... not to be Personal but my biological brother graduates High School tomorrow, and for some reason this conversation just reminded me so much of me and him and now I’m emotional

- NOT THE SYPHILIS BANDITS DSYUHDFJKLSFJ;DS OKAY I NEEDED THAT LAUGH

- “I’d like to hear about your friend” Kingsley aww

- Beau giving Kingsley her first diary to help him realize who they all are is actually so perfectly fitting, I love that!

- “The other eight and I, yes” Caleb counting all nine of them again  😭

- CALEB BEING OFFERED AN ASSEMBLY SEAT WTF AAAHHH

- Oh shit, Astrid took the Assembly seat... I’m not sure how I feel about this, I feel so bad for her for having to stay in the system that abused her for so long and I would have loved to see her burn the whole thing down, but I hope that she at least has a sense of contentment with this title

- “I go where you go, baby” Beauyasha.... my darling loves....

- Beau’s dad??? But also Beau being the one with power over her father is so Good, I’m glad that she got justice on that front as well!

- This talk with Artagan... “I didn’t want you to be a god. I wanted you to be my friend.” and in the process my love you created divinity... maybe divinity is the friends we made along the way

- OH SHIT WE ARE GETTING ALL THE VANDRAN LORE TONIGHT I’M READY LET’S GO LET’S GO

- VANDRAN AND AVANTIKA WERE AN ITEM???

- Wait crack theory: Sabian was a half elf right? Could he be the son of Vandren and Avantika? Or is that too much of a stretch? 

- Vandran going with them!!! Also I feel like that moment between Fjord and Vandran was lowkey a tease to a post-campain Uk’otoa one shot and I am ready for it already 

- THIS BEAUYASHA MOMENT... “i’ve never known anyone as deeply as i know you” & “explore every bit of you in multiple ways ;)” & “your past doesn’t scare me, it only makes you beautiful” .... this is so much they are so much i love them so much

- “I will have you and then some” Beauyasha   😭

- I’m torn between “oh my god there’s still half an hour left?” and “how is there only half an hour left??”

- “You will let this Skyspear live at least?” oh my god so Yasha killed the last Skyspear then? Oof...

- YASHA GIVING ZUALA(’S GRAVE) THE BOOK OF FLOWERS, OH DEAR HEART

- And Beau’s talk to Zuala about being the luckiest woman alive and sacrifice.... 😭  

- PLANTING FLOWERS AT ZUALA’S GRAVE... “NO BETTER GRAVE MARKER” THIS IS MAKING ME SO EMOTIONAL, I KNOW I’VE SAID THIS A LOT THIS EPISODE BUT THIS TRULY IS SO BEAUTIFUL

- So... I may or may not be crying again

- Shadowgast with a steel chair??

- Caleb’s plan for saving his parents... it’s clear he has thought of this so much, oh my darling love  😭

- Caleb burning down his chance to change his past is so symbolic and something he really needed to do, it does make me emotional though

- The other book was him writing to his parents?? Oh bby boy  😭  

- While I would have loved for Caleb to open his own magic school (especially with Essek, or the Mighty Nein, or someone else as well), I am so pleased that he stays with Veth and that their friendship continues for the rest of their life because again: they mean so so much to me, and in a way they remind me of me and my biological brother (which I never realized before this episode) and yeah. They just make me Emo

- Also. Caleb being a professor was my Number One Endgame Hope for him and the fact that it came true is just so surreal in the best way possible. I’m so used to being robbed of happy endings. The fact that the Mighty Nein all got theirs makes me incredibly happy. A story does not have to be sad to be impactful. Happy stories and happy endings, especially during a time period of tumultuous real life circumstances, have just as much value and meaning and they always will. Caleb is teaching the next generation magic, and he is teaching them to be Good, and he is nurturing them, and that just means so much

- MATT CRYING IS GONNA GET TO ME

- “Let’s do it again” Please, let’s.

- Okay, everyone. I made it all seven hours in one piece with surprisingly minimal tears (though who knows, this might all sink in tomorrow.) I already wrote my thoughts earlier today about how much the Mighty Nein mean to me and how much this show and these characters have kept me holding on during quarantine and today... I’m still not ready to let them go, but I know that I can always revisit to say hello and to say thank you for changing me. Until then though... I love you all more than you could ever know. And for the last time of Campaign 2... is it Thursday yet?

Good night 💗

#cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #c2e141 #critical role #my liveblogs #cr2 #i genuinely can't believe this is the end y'all... what a journey. what a freaking journey 💗 #to anyone who has ever interacted with even one of my liveblogs: i love you and i think about you every damn day dfghjkflf #it makes me Emo knowing that i'm not just speaking to the void and that there are ppl out there listening etc #also this liveblog was TWO THOUSAND WORDS LONG i checked it in a google doc sgdhjkdl #so if you made it through all that you may be entitled to financial compensation #but in all seriousness: i love you mighty nein. and thank you for everything. #is it thursday yet? #queue #(i always queue these for the mornings dgfhjk!) #and yes i WILL be liveblogging campaign 3 #also mayhaps this hiatus will be time for me to catch up with vox machina?

[djs-sideblog-for-pog-trains]

ttte 2x3 beauty and the beast au

ok hi so this is me copy-pasting a somewhat coherent ramble i wrote at like 3am half a week ago out of a word document so bear with. It’s based on the 1991 animated disney film but I haven’t stuck to it point for point, necessarily.

warnings: discussion of lost parents, violence and stuff, someone dies and then gets better, anything from the original film applies. Villain Diesel 10, so if you like sympathetic D10 you wont find it here lmao im sorry

Also, i swear a bit in this im sorry.

@togetherness23 for your interest :)

ok let’s crack into it! putting under the cut for convenience. it’s about 4000 words lmao. It’s half-bulletpoints-half-dialogue.

Henry is the ‘spoiled’/worrisome prince (he’s not actually spoiled, not really, he’s just been through a lot and has some terrible coping habits no-one’s called him out on for most of his early life), living in a big castle. It’s mostly him and his servants after his parents died when he was young.

I think our relative stand-ins here are thus: Lumiere is James, Gordon is Cogsworth and Molly is Mrs Potts. Idk about chip. This isn’t a one-for-one. (Note: Mrs Potts type character could be Emily but I want it to be Molly so it’s Molly :3)

However he gets cursed by an old wizard who thinks he needs knocking down a peg or two, after Henry (who is young and doesn’t really behave good yet) does something akin his actions that led to Henry’s Tunnel incident. 

The wizard is Sir Topham Hatt. He curses Henry to be trapped in his castle (Henry’s Tunnel incident), he curses his servants n shit to be furniture, he curses Henry to be a beast, and he curses Henry to remain a beast until he finds someone who he can love, who will love him in return, and who will say ‘I love you’. That, says the dangerous old wizard, is the phrase that will break the curse.

“Is there a time limit?” Henry asks, his voice suddenly growling and guttural, fighting out words past horribly sharp teeth he doesn’t know how to talk around. It’s hard to stand normally. He hunches over, hunkers down, he’s so much bigger now and he has claws and honestly it feels so unnatural all of a sudden to stand on two legs but he’s cowering in front of this short man who has more power than he could ever fathom.

“No,” the wizard says, patting down his coats and robes offhandedly, adjusting his weird black hat. “The curse can be broken anytime before your death.”

Anytime before your death.

The Beast looks down at himself and can’t help the growl that bubbles over. It’s not a growl of anger, but of misery and defeat. This is a death sentence.

“Good luck,” the wizard says, almost humorously, like he’s pleased with himself. and maybe it’s the beast in him now but Henry really wants to rip the guy’s face off, “I hope you learn your lesson.”

And he disappears between one blink and the next.

Henry’s eyes turn to his servants, his faithful servants, and begins to see the true scope of the crossfire.

 ------

Edward Bell and his son Thomas have lived in this village for many years now, since Thomas was a baby, when Edward and his then-wife and their son had moved here from a big city, but for most of Thomas’ life, it’d just been the two of them.

Edward is a quietly hard worker. He doesn’t really stick his nose in where it doesn’t belong but the whole town really tries to do it to him. He’s a mechanic, of sorts, though a writer/poet at heart – not that he really has the time to indulge in it when he’s trying to support him and his sixteen year old son. Thomas adores him, is fiercely protective of him, and is not afraid to pick fights when people bad-mouth his father in the general vicinity of him.

The Gaston here is Diesel 10. I don’t think there’s going to be a romance thing here bc that feels weird to me. I think Diesel 10 just always wants something from Edward. He might be under the illusion that the Bells are wealthy, and is trying to use Edward’s kindness to wheedle as much as he can out of them.

Diesel 10’s lacky, the LeFou here, is Diesel. He might be 10’s younger brother, I think? Him and Thomas are about the same age, and fight often. They could be friends, if 10 didn’t hate them so much, causing Diesel to follow in his footsteps, and if Thomas weren’t so quick to anger.

 --------------------

Thomas is the one who gets lost in the woods, in the middle of a snow-storm, attacked by wolves, and stumbles across the old castle. It’s clearly abandoned (from the outside) and has been for a couple decades at least. But still, it’s got to be safer than being eaten by wolves, so Thomas hurries inside. He was supposed to be running an errand for his dad, but now…

He meets the enchanted furniture, who are so excited to see him and are in a rush to try and keep him here, being as inviting as possible, with James really fronting the effort (it’s their first chance! Maybe they’re only chance! And he’s young, but… will they get another chance?)

Henry discovers Thomas here, with his stuff, and gets very angry, but when he gets pulled aside with the vague suggestions/reminders about the curse, he gets even angrier. “that is a child.”

He puts Thomas in what kinda looks like a prison cell but it’s well insulated and sturdy, and not uncomfortable. Thomas takes this as being a prisoner, and he’s immediately begging and threatening to be let out.

Henry, who Thomas hasn’t really seen in full yet, just cast in dim half-shadows and the like, thumps on his door with a growl.

“You’re staying here,” he growls. “At least for now.”

And he storms off. (He is not going to turn that kid out in the middle of the night and snowstorm and wolves, he’s not a complete monster).

The real kicker, though, is that Edward has stayed up all night waiting for Thomas to come home, worrying as the hours tick past when he said he’d be back, and as soon as the sun is rising he sets out himself to go find him, setting out a ‘be back soon, out on an errand’ sign on his front door.

He finds his own way to the castle, is immediately let in by furniture who now realise this is a far better candidate and demands to know what has happened to his son. Henry -still being a dramatic bitch and not showing his true form- takes him down to where Thomas is, and hesitantly agrees to let Thomas go, if Edward stays.

Edward is stumped.

“Thomas is all I have,” he says. “I… I won’t be separated from him.”

“I’m not going, if you’re keeping him here!” Thomas hollers from behind his bars. “Let us both go!”

Henry growls once, raising to his full height, and both humans shy back in fear and horror as they begin to realise what they’re dealing with.

“You are not leaving,” Henry snarls, before he seems to catch himself, and he shoves past Edward and opens the door of Thomas’ cell.

In shock, they both watch this beast sweep his cloak behind him as he storms towards the stairs. Then he turns back.

“Well?” he demands, and Edward and Thomas all but stumble after him, Edward’s arm around Thomas’ shoulders, both of them afraid to disobey whatever force of nature they’ve now crossed.

Their surprise, however, when the beast takes them up some wide stairs, across a sweeping landing and down a lavish corridor, where he turns and throws open two sets of doors, either side of each other.

“Your rooms,” he says curtly. “The servants will show you to meals. The only place in the castle that is off-limits is the West Wing, but I’d recommend avoiding the kitchens as well. Gets dangerous in there.”

And then he sweeps off. They notice he seems to travel on all fours as much as he does two legs.

Edward lets Thomas pick a room, and they both collapse onto the same, enormous bed and curl up like they do on harsh winter nights when the pitiful log fire they manage to built isn’t enough.

 ---------------------------

Thomas is so fucking suspicious of this guy, this monster, who hasn’t really treated them awfully yet, but he is a prick.  Edward is too, but despite himself he can see a kindred spirit of sorts in those strangely human eyes of his. Henry never gives his name, just tells them to call him Beast. His servants only ever call him ‘master’ to his face  or ‘the master’ behind it.

James and Gordon and Molly are giving him advice, most  of it not very good, but they won’t lie, the possibility of change, finally, has them all a bit desperate (especially James). Henry’s trying not to get his hopes up, because Edward’s really a bit weird to him, but also he’s kinda cute and he’s getting a bit enamoured despite himself. But also his anxious side is pinning him down and he doesn’t want to act.

They’ve been there for maybe three or four, maybe more, weeks at this point. Thomas is extremely suspicious. So he comes up with a plan.

Thomas makes the request to get some of their stuff from their house and bring it to the castle, seeing as they’re stuck here now, to which Edward thinks of wistfully and Henry begrudgingly agrees, seeing as Edward’s the one bound here by their deal more so than Thomas.

Thomas takes this opportunity to ride back into town and tell everyone he can of the alleged danger they’re in (because he really thinks his dad’s in danger).

I think he overhears the servants talking at one point, mostly James Gordon and Molly, about how they might actually be able to break the curse, if the master can get this man to fall in love with him, and is terrified of his dad being manipulated/taken advantage of like that.

He can hardly get anyone to listen but to his surprise it’s Diesel 10 who listens, takes a very large interest in what he has to say, because if it’s true, rescuing Edward Bell could be very profitable for him, and also he’s a hunter. What a trophy a beast like this kid is describing is. But he asks Thomas to prove it and Thomas gives him some knick-knack he’s smuggled out of the place (just a small thing, like a really fancy teaspoon, but it’s enough to prove there’s a wholeass castle out there in the woods). 

Diesel is shaken by how desperate Thomas is for his family member’s safety. He begins to question whether 10 would worry about him and his safety that much, or if Thomas is weird like that, or… or if 10 isn’ actually that good of a brother. He resolves to put a pin in it and come back to that later.

Thomas convinces them to help him, but also says that if they act too soon they might actually put Edward in danger. That the Beast might expect him to return with reinforcements. So he asks them to wait Three More Weeks before advancing, he’ll try and slip out and meet up with them to help, and he gives them somewhat detailed directions to the castle before going home, packing some stuff he wants and some stuff Edward requested, and heading back to the castle, relieved to finally have a plan.

 ---------------------

However, as plans go, they go wrong. And Thomas begins to realise, the more and more time he spends here, that maybe… maybe The Beast is actually good after all.

He is getting kinder as time goes on, less gruff and scary, and when Thomas accidentally breaks his beloved flute (he has a flute lol ig it’s like his whistle) Henry shows him a huge music room they have, and gives him a spare instrument and tells him not to give up playing. Henry used to play music when he was young, before the transformation, and it’s something he cant do anymore and one of the things he misses dearly. He listens to Thomas practice and it brings him a lot of peace.

It brings Thomas a lot of guilt.

Henry shows Edward the library after Edward confesses at one point that he’d always wanted to be an writer himself, but especially after moving to a small town the literary resources were so limited. Edward is immediately enamoured with this, and they have some bonding moments over Shakespeare and stuff idk.

Thomas gets more and more stand-off-ish as the Deadline draws closer, and he can kinda see his dad is falling for the Beast, but he also sees the Beast is… also doing the same, and kinda… is good enough… maybe? And after the like,,, big Ball Night he confronts Edward and tells him what he knows about the curse (which isn’t the whole story – just the thing about love making him turn back to normal) and accuses Henry of manipulating him (bc Thomas is so stubborn he literally never thinks he’s wrong so to be wrong now would be the worst thing that’s ever happened to him), to which Edward gets very angry over.

They have a huge fight, probably in front of servants and stuff (ie James Gordon Molly) and maybe the Beast overhears some of it. Thomas sort-of confesses to what he’s organised – to which there’s a lot of mistrust suddenly thrown his way; he can feel the very air change – and he tells his dad to either come with him or hide if he knows what’s good for him. Edward tells him he knows exactly what’s good for him, thank you very much, and he’s not fucking moving. It’s their first proper Big Fight. Thomas runs away.

There’s a magic mirror thrown in here somewhere as well, which Henry prized above many things because he otherwise never would get to see the outside world again. 

After a few hours, when Thomas doesn’t come back, Edward quietly knocks on the West Wing doors, to which The Beast answers, trying to be angry that Edward’s here but the broken look on the man’s face makes that impossible to keep up. Edward asks to borrow the mirror to check if Thomas is hurt or not, and Henry, in a stunning moment of vulnerability and trust, lets Edward into the West Wing himself.

Like the 1991 movie, the place is a fucking dump from years’ worth of grief and anger and disgust and denial, and Edward looks and sees but doesn’t ask. Henry plucks his precious mirror off the table and hands it to Edward, who asks to see Thomas.

He sees Thomas being held up by the wrist, a look of distress written plain on his face as he shouts something (the mirror is silent) surrounded by an angry mob. And he is being held up by Diesel 10, who has madness in his eyes and is rousing up the village with his anger. (Diesel’s in the background, being a lot quieter, looking conflicted. But Edward’s attention’s not on that).

“Thomas!”

He turns to Henry, desperate. “I need to go to him,” he begs, and he is begging, and Henry has a moment of destiny here. Either he can say no, and Thomas gets hurt or even killed, Edward hates him for the rest of time, and he dies forever a Beast.

Or…

Or he can let Edward go, keep his memories sweet, let Edward save his family, and… he dies forever a beast.

He knows what he can stand more. For Edward.

“You can go,” he says, his own voice sounding so distant to himself.

Edward’s eyes immediately well up, and then there’s commotion.

“Master Henry, you can’t!” James shouts, his candlelight casting dramatic shadows as he gestures wildly. But a growl – the first growl in weeks from Henry – cuts him off.

But Edward doesn’t falter. “Thank you,” he says breathlessly, pressing his hand to Henry’s cheek in a moment of tenderness which Henry can only assume is driven by gratefulness. “Thank you so, so, much.”

He goes to hand the mirror back, but Henry hesitates, before reaching out and closing Edward’s hands back over it slowly.

“It’s yours,” he whispers, the low rumble of his voice hiding how much it’s shaking. “You might have more need of it than I.”

Edward smiles once – tense but so thankful – and throws his arms around Henry’s neck tightly.

And then Edward rushes out of the room, out of the castle, and away.

As Edward thunders away on horseback, he swears he hears a howl in the distance, something truly forlorn and lost.

“How could you do that!” James explodes, angry only in his grief. “You’ve doomed us all! How could you let him go?!”

But his anger fizzles out as he sees the hopelessly sad look in Henry’s eyes, so lost and tired.

“Because I love him,” the Beast whispers, before lowering his head in defeat. “I’m… I’m sorry. I’ve… You didn’t deserve this. Any of you. You’re always paying for my mistakes.”

“We better do something about that invasion,” Gordon prompts gently, and Henry lets them lead him out the room, seeing a castle in chaos as the furniture does what it can, before he goes back into his chambers, into the West Wing, and closes the door behind him.

 ---------------------------

Edward comes face to face with the crowd just outside of town, and tries to talk them down. He tries to use his mirror as proof but D10 only uses it to stir the mob into a frenzy.

Thomas and Edward get locked up in like, a cellar. They make up there, with Thomas trying to explain how he’s always just trying to protect his dad, and Edward explaining how he’s trying to protect his son, and that it’ll be alright, and it’s really cute.

There’s been someone left behind to guard them. It’s Diesel. Diesel really wanted to go with his brother, but 10 shut him down immediately saying something really cruel to him (something in line with what he’s been saying the whole time, but only now, especially so harshly compared to how Thomas and Edward would die for each other, that it really begins to wear down on Diesel).

Through the cellar door, Edward and Thomas beg to be let out, but Diesel remains fairly resolute. It’s only until Thomas goads him into snapping that Diesel finally fucking emotes.

He yells at Thomas for all the arguments and fights they’ve had, for how Thomas has convinced him he’s a horrible person, to which Thomas also fucking snaps and exclaims yeah, well maybe he’s wrong.

And that shuts up everyone immediately because if there’s one thing about Thomas... it’s that he always thinks he’s right, all the time.

“I’ve made so many mistakes,” Thomas hisses, forehead against the cellar doors. “I hurt people. I might get Henry killed because of it, and I hate that. I’m wrong, Diesel. I’m wrong about so many things. And you know what? I’m also willing to be wrong about you.”

There’s a moment of silence.

Then, Diesel opens the cellar.

“he’s going to kill me for this,” he mutters, but helps Thomas and Edward out of the makeshift prison, and gives them his horse. “but I don’t care anymore.”

Edward pauses after he climbs up after Thomas, and thanks Diesel severely. So does Thomas, and fuck, he’s crying, and Diesel looks away but nods, and then they’re off.

 -----------------------

Running through the carnage of the invasion Edward is booking it right up to the West Wing, where he can see the doors have been flung right open.

Diesel 10 has been trying to goad The Beast into fighting back, but the damn thing is just too sad, it seems, and it’s nearly impossible. It’s not until 10 starts taunting the Beast about what he’s done to Edward and Thomas that he finally gets a reaction.

And let’s just say Henry has a lot of rage bundled up in him after these, what, thirty, forty years stuck like this.

The fight is dramatic and a little bloody, and theyre out on the rooftops and Henry’s about to fucking kill him when he realises what he’s doing, especially when 10 starts begging for his life. He retreats a little, a little horrified over what he was about to do. 10 scrabbles back reaching for a fallen knife with wide, then calculating, eyes.

Then Edward appears over the balcony, shouting for him, and he calls “Henry!”

And all of a sudden nothing else matters.

Henry starts to clamber towards him, his eyes glittering with life, and then-

Fuck, 10 stabs him from behind, shouting that the fight’s not over, and he nearly kills Henry, Edward trying to help but also just trying not to fall to his death.

Henry ends up throwing 10 off the roof – not into the abyss – but to some area lower down where he definitely lands with a crunch but he’s still breathing.

But gods, the damage is done.

It’s raining. Henry collapses to his knees as Edward runs over, and helps him off the roof onto the wide balcony from the ballroom, eyes wide and hands shaking.

Thomas runs over, and with one look from Edward, promises to find a doctor or something, and goes running off.

Edward lays Henry out on his back, trying not to cry and failing miserably as Henry takes such painful and shallow breaths.

“Hi,” he wheezes none-the-less, making Edward laugh and brush some of his fur back out of his eyes.

“Hi yourself,” he whispers back.

“…You came back.”

“of course I did,” Edward replied. “How could I not?”

Henry shifts and Edward winces, doing his best to staunch bleeding.

“Thomas is going to find someone who can help,” he promises, “just stay with me, Henry. It is Henry, right? I heard James call you that.”

“Henry,” Henry echoes, almost in awe. “Yes, yes that’s my name.”

“It’s a lovely name,” Edward’s hand is getting slick with blood. “I look forward to using it in the future.”

‘Edward,” Henry shakes his head. “I’m so sorry. You didn’t need to see this.”

“You didn’t need to do this,” Edward pushes back. “Stop talking like that, you’ll be fine.”

“No,” Henry huffs out a weak sigh. “I won’t.”

They both know it.

“You have to hold on.”

“Edward, thank you.”

“What?”

“I… I get it now,” Henry waves a hand weakly and vaguely in the air. “I get what I was missing. I get it, why I was cursed like this.”

He slumps back against Edward, breathing so shallow.

“He did say it was til death,” he murmurs to himself.

“Henry,” Edward begs. “Henry, please, stay with me. Henry. Henry!”

His eyes are closing.

“No!” Edward pulls him in tight, clinging to him like he can cling to life through him, for him. “Henry, don’t… I love you, Henry, I love you. Don’t leave me!”

Henry falls still. He’s not breathing. Edward screams.

The servants, the furniture, look on in horror and sadness. They never thought it’d end like this – too short, too little, too late. What would become of them?

But as Henry’s body starts to fucking glow, it turns out they might not have to find out.

Edward can only sit back and watch, shellshocked, as literal magic takes place before his eyes. It seeps out of Henry, darkness spilling out to give way to glorious green light, his body morphing and shifting into something, after all these years, that is finally recognisable as human.

----------------

---- in that moment of white, where everything seems to have ended, Henry  opens his eyes and sees before him the same old wizard from all those years ago. But instead of angry, the wizard seems pleased. Proud, even.

“Congratulations,” the wizard says, before Henry can put any words together. “You have learnt your lesson, hm?”

All Henry can do is nod.

“He’s a nice man,” the wizard smiles. “You’ve done well. Enjoy the rest of your life, Prince Henry.”----

----------------

Henry’s body gently drapes itself across the ground, and Edward hesitantly draws near, not really recognising who is lying before him but still… he’s seen this man before in ruined paintings, and also it literally was his Beast just moments before…

And then the chest starts to rise and fall again. And Edward watches, heart in his mouth, as the man with the long, wild ginger hair the same colour of the fur he knew so well sits up, and opens his eyes.

The same, ice-blue, beautifully human eyes.

“Henry?” he asks softly.

“…Edward,” Henry whispers back. “I… You did it. You …broke my curse.”

“I love you,” Edward blurts, before covering his mouth as he blushes, but the rising colour in Henry’s cheeks is beautiful too, and he gets to his feet with surprising ease for someone who was dead like a minute ago, and slowly closes the distance between them until he’s crowding Edward’s space.

“I love you too,” he says back, tilting Edward’s face up towards his with the utmost care. “I love you.”

Edward responds by throwing his arms around Henry’s steady shoulders and kissing him for all he’s worth.

 -------------------

The furniture all change back, James and Gordon (who might have been flirting the whole time) finally break their decades of tension it’s GREAT

Diesel made it to the castle, saw the drama, and the magic spell that broke the curse, reverted the furniture and Henry back, dropped the barrier that prevented Henry specifically from leaving, and all that jazz, also healed Diesel 10, but he’s still out cold. He gets dragged away to prison in irons.

Diesel is loitering at the huge party that’s broken out, and Thomas finds him in a corner.

“hey,” he starts.

“Hey,” Diesel replies.

“I… thank you,” Thomas blurts, toeing the marble floor with his boot. “Thank you so much. You saved him. I-I owe you.”

Diesel rubs his arm and flushes a little. “Consider it… me beginning to pay back all the things I said,” he replies eventually, “about you and your dad.”

“I…” Thomas takes a breath, and nods. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” Diesel looks down, and he feels awful shy for reasons he cant describe. And for once it doesn’t really feel awkward. “A-and… thanks. For apologising.”

Thomas swallows hard. “Yeah,” he mumbles. “I… you’re welcome too, I guess. I… Diesel, can we start over?”

Diesel swallows as well, before daring to smile. “I think that’d be nice.”

“Well, then… hi,” Thomas chirps, sticking out his hand. “I’m Thomas, nice to meet you!”

Diesel laughs, and it’s the first time Thomas has heard him really laugh, and shakes his oustretched hand. “Diesel.”

 --------------

AND THEY BECOME FRIENDS AND EVERYONE LIVES HAPPILY EVER AFTER THE END fhdjgkhjfghldg

#ttte #ttte au #ttte henry #ttte edward #2x3 #ttte thomas #ttte diesel 10 #ttte diesel #dj's writing #beauty and the beast au #henryxedward #ttte james #ttte gordon #ttte molly #4x5 #gonna tag that bc it's mentioned #idk this is way bigger/more thought out than it needs to be but like #i love this

[violet-t-9]

Check in on my (not very realistic) wish list for episode 138

1. Nobody dies in the battle against Cree, even temporarily (looking at you, squishy wizards). Everybody survives and defeats her relatively easily.

Ayyye I mean Cree was one vs. 6 basically and of course it was easy enough, I expected this. Bye Cree, I won’t really miss you... WAIT she got controlled after death?? Well, the actual Cree fight was still easy so I’m counting this. The flesh monster version also took less than like, 20 seconds in-game time to beat lol.

2. Caleb or Beau’s eye power come into play whether for them or against them during the combat (telepathy also counts).

Heyyyy Caleb and Beau could pick up on the radio! That is helpful- oh he turned Cree into a flesh monster using the eyes... oh NO everyone has eyes now except Jester and Yasha. Group telepathy could be useful?? I guess??

3. Beau and Caleb discover the third function of their eyes if there is one (besides true sight and telepathy).

Nope I have no idea. I’m assuming that seeing through illusions and dark vision are separate at this point. That’s fine considering the huge twist that almost all of them have eyes now, like hello?? Caleb also wondered if he has a fourth power now, which we still don’t know about.

4. The party gets some much needed rest, even a short one, after defeating Cree (Bonus: heroes’ feast).

Hey the time shunt thing worked! PERFECTLY! With a 30 and a 24! I love two wizards, my absolute beloved. THANKS ESSEK (and Caleb, but Essek mostly).

5. This is a long shot but still hoping for any mention/sighting of Yussa.

Thanks Caleb for mentioning Yussa! Also Beau was able to try to connect to Yussa thanks to the eyes too! What a cool moment. Also thanks everybody for agreeing to help him lol. Caleb banished him! They saved him! Yayyyyy.

6. More nightmarish body horror and screaming from the cognouza citizens (look, listen, I loved last episode okay, Matt is awesome, horror is my jam).

Yes for the intestine corridor and flesh puddles, also for Cree transformation, also for the threshold crest vault mouth opening thing and for literally everything else in this episode need I explain? As a student of science I am very much enjoying the weird physiology connections with the Cognouza.

7. They meet another member of the Somnovem who offers more information.

Jester’s Calm emotion what a queen, they did meet a Somnovem. Wow I never thought I’d find eternal love so creepy but thanks Gaudius. Gaudius is apparently against Fastidan and Culpasi, nice. Good to know that the Somnovem Omega still does not get along lol. 

8. Beau and Yasha’s PDA or power couple moments (bonus: they talk about mind control, the eyes, or feelings).

OH WOW Yasha has IDEAS about Beau wearing a red cape does she now lol, not subtle at all as expected. Get a room you guys! Not much talking can be done at this point, but nice.

9. Fjord and Jester’s conversation or domesticity (bonus: they talk about hope for the future).

“All we care about is love and unity” LMAO JESTER taking your chance to smooch as much as possible. I’m counting this moment you cannot convince me otherwise.

10. Artagan/Sprinkle comes into play/is mentioned and interaction with Jester.

Yep, they both talked (well, hissed in one case) with Jester. Artagan thought about them going to the feywild too! Fun.

11. Obligatory wish for Essek’s fancy dunamancy or magical items (Bonus: we get to see more high-damage AOE offensive spells).

Magic missile again! At least that will never miss. Sad that he can’t do AOE ever with the party around lol. ALSO THE TIME SHUNT BY THE TWO WIZARDS! The 30 from Essek (dunamancy master indeed!) and the dirty 24 from Caleb, NICE.

12. Obligatory wish for Caleb’s polymorph spell on himself or a party member.

Jester’s polymorph spell was cool too! Jestape? Japester?? I like Japester. Polymorph! Jester’s interactions are also my beloved. It’s not Caleb’s spell, so I’m not counting this one.

13. The party tracks down Lucien and tries to reach him by mentioning Molly.

Well, they attempted to track down Lucien, but really it’s the other way around. 

14. Obligatory wish for Essek’s room in the tower (it will stay until it happens).

Nope, as expected.

15. Obligatory wish for Cad being a MVP in and out of combat also for him to use decompose more on the city, I’m curious to see what happens.

That path to the grave, what a MVP move Cad. TWO TIMES! TWO TIMES! For the HDYWTDT from Veth too! I knew it, Cad is a combat genius. Also nice blight on the fleshy ceiling. Also plane shift to the fire plane! Also that curse word speech what a king.

16. Veth one-on-one RP interaction with any other party member - we had some good tag teams recently, like Veth and Beau, Veth and Yasha, Veth and Essek... I want to see more!

We don’t really have time for RP because this episode was super action-packed but we did have a bunch of nice short moments!

17. Yasha or Fjord being absolutely freaked out/creeped out by the city.

Well to be fair EVERYBODY was super creeped out, so...

18.  The empire siblings don’t get another red eye (well, hopefully this will happen if they won’t get a full rest).

Well ironically, Beau and Caleb DID NOT get another red eye during the whole party members gaining red eyes scene- Nope, Caleb got one more. Honestly, pretty excited and anxious at the same time.

19. Somebody check in on Essek’s mental/physical state because for a newbie adventurer he is doing suspiciously well - I wonder if he is just desensitized at this point.

Poor Essek was very physically hurt and also shook shook by Cree being transformed... so not entirely desensitized. He even failed the wisdom saving throw OH NO HE IS GETTING EYES ISN’T HE CALLING IT RN READ IN BOOKS I know what book is kinda associated with a wisdom save. Update: I KNEW IT, and I don’t care that nobody will believe me that I called it. Still sad that nobody really got to role play much, but I’m enjoying the action.

20. Caleb uses more fire or his customized spells (last episode’s awesome Widogast’s web of fire got me missing all his unique spells).

Disintegrate followed by CAT’S IRE HYPE and the clutch immovable object used for the first time what’s sexier than wizards NOTHING.

21. Fjord being the leader of the group in any way or just does something very impressive (go Fjord Tough).

Nice hexblade curse and triple Eldritch Blasts Fjord! Warlock powers let’s go! Also, nice counterspell! That divine smite + crit star razor oof that’s such a beautiful 80 damage. VERY impressive indeed.

22. We get to see new spells/abilities/features gained by their level-up! That will probably not come into play until a long rest, but one can hope.

MIND BLANK AT 8TH LEVEL what a perfect spell for Caleb. They got a long rest thanks to the mini Beacon! I love it. Jester and Cad showed off some spells as well!

23. Lucien physically reacting to the party’s attempts to bring up Molly’s memories/moments and showing confusion/hesitation.

Well they didn’t get to try anything really, Lucien spent most of the time doing his cool, dramatic and drawn-out villain monologue thing, also his maniac laughter scared me way more than the scream from last episode.

24. Obligatory wish for everyone to remain relatively happy and alive by the end of the episode except Cree (I have a feeling that Lucien ain’t dying this episode), and the episode ends on a terrifying cliffhanger as always.

Rip Cree, and what do you know, cliffhanger! Gosh I love this show.

Bonus:

Nice dimension door Jester, she is SO on task and such a key player in these crucial moments!! What a queen, it’s thanks to her (and Caleb, but it’s her idea first!) that they got to the crest so quickly and got rid of it. I repeat, QUEEN.

Veth’s first shot AND the final shot were awesome in terms of damage, rogues am I right?

Wow what a confrontation. I thought Lucien was all for the Somnovem but apparently he is... just super chaotic?? And wants to rule them all?? What was that all about? Lucien just gets more and more complex and I’m conflicted because now they might need to fight him, the city, or both. This is getting super complicated and I can’t wait for the next episode.

Well guys, this session made me scream in joy and also feel what it’s like to be high on adrenaline. The episodes just keep getting better and better. I literally could not care less if this is the final arc - if it is, it’s a damn good one. I love the cast so much, I love critical role so much. I wish it could be Thursday every day of the week!

#cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #c2e138 #the mighty nein #manifest list #cr liveblog #critical role #campaign 2

[diamcndgirl]

have you ever thought to yourself, “hmm, i love one direction and i love waltrp... i wonder what would happen if we gave every taken character a one direction song that reminds me of them??” well, don’t worry because even if it never crossed your mind because it did for me. i’m back once again with another silly little #waltmeme for you with songs by one direction or their solo albums that remind me of your characters. the choices can have something to do with a certain lyric, the title, or just the all around vibe it gives me that makes me think of them. don’t worry everything is under ‘read more’ and in alphabetical order-- or whatever order the taken list is in. p.s. not everyone has a blurb. but i still had a reason for everyone. if you really wanna know why just dm me and i'll give an explanation. love u mean it.

ALEJANDRO DIAZ - STOLE MY HEART / ONE DIRECTION

“you stole my heart with just one look” alejandro, my love, my heart. it’s clear the reason i chose this song is because it talks about having something stolen. but, you and your band of misfit criminal friends can steal my heart any day.

AURORA CAPULET - LITTLE THINGS / ONE DIRECTION

“i can’t let these little things slip out of my mouth” aurora you may be thinking.. this song talks about all my imperfections why would you pick such a thing? oh no! it’s not because i think you’re imperfect at all. it’s because i’m totally in love with all the little things that make you who you are.. and not to mention i couldn’t not give you a ballad. 

ANNA ARNADALR - HEY ANGEL / ONE DIRECTION

“hey angel do you ever try to come to the other side?” this whole song has anna vibes. anna, you’re an angel.. did you know that? well, angel… when you aren’t busy trying to fix your sisterly connection come to the other side and hang out with me.

BECKHAM TEAGUE - NICE TO MEET YA / NIALL

“i want your number tattooed on my arm in ink i swear.” the song, the lyrics, the vibe all just fits beckham’s personality very well. 

BENNET DOE - SWEET CREATURE / HARRY

“sweet creature running through the garden oh where nothing bothered us.”  sweet, soft, and lovely bennet.. sweet creature is one of my favorite songs in the world and it reminds me so much of you. i couldn’t pick a character better than you to give it to. 

BARLEY LIGHTFOOT - CANYON MOON / HARRY

“i keep thinking back to a time under the canyon moon.” lyrically this song doesn’t fit you, barley. not truly. but, aesthetically it reminds me of you very much. you’re adventurous and a little out there just like this harry styles tune. the bridge especially gives me a vibe of riding around in guinevere out on an adventure.

CASSANDRA JAGER - ONLY THE BRAVE / LOUIS

“tall stories on the page, short glories on the fade.” cassandra reminds me of strength and being brave (wink wink). and this song just reminds me of you, cass. though short it gives me a feeling like i can kick some ass. 

DANI DENNISON - THROUGH THE DARK / ONE DIRECTION

“oh i will carry you over fire and water for your love and i will hold you closer hope your heart is strong enough.” i love dani.. like really really love your sweet soul. she’s the cutest truly. just the sound and lyrics remind me so much of her and her heart to help the ones she cares about. 

DAPHNE BLAKE - LITTLE BLACK DRESS / ONE DIRECTION

“i wanna see the way you move for me, baby” clearly this song isn’t anything to write home about lyrically. but, when i hear this song i get all excited and ready to go take on the world. something about it makes me feel like i’m the hottest girl in the room and it should go to the hottest girl in the room.. which is you, daphne.

ELIZABETH MCQUEEN - WOMAN / HARRY 

“i hope you can see, the shape that I’m in while he’s touching your skin.” hi elizabeth.. this song is just hot. you’re just hot.. i really am jealous of monty and would take his place at any given moment if you let me.

ELSA ARNADALR - DON’T LET IT BREAK YOUR HEART / LOUIS

“don’t you let it kill you even when it hurts like hell. oh, whatever tears you apart don’t let it break your heart.” elsa, you’re truly the strongest girl i know. this song just radiates that energy of getting over what you’ve been through and not letting it break you down. 

EMILY LORELEYN - BLUE / ZAYN

“in the clouds where the angels sing. in your eyes, where i wanna be and her smile is all i see….. i need someone to love me blue.” emily is a goddess okay.. like she’s so beautiful and kindhearted. this song is so beautiful and then also the ‘love me blue’. reminds me of her origin and how she waited for love until she passed and turned blue. 

EUGENE FITZHERBERT - ONE WAY OR ANOTHER (TEENAGE KICKS) / ONE DIRECTION

“and when the lights are all out.. i’ll follow your bus downtown.” oh horace.. this whole song just fits you so well.. the teenage kicks mashup with the joan jett classic. it just embodies you so well. i don’t think i could’ve picked a better song for you. 

FLORIAN CHARMONT - NIGHT CHANGES / ONE DIRECTION

FRANCIS KYDD - SOMETHING GREAT / ONE DIRECTION

“come on, jump out at me. come on, bring everything. is it too much to ask for something great? the script was written and i could not change a thing. i want to rip it all to shreds and start again.” there isn’t a real lyrical reason i picked this song for you, francis. just something about it made me think of you. just gave me a feeling that it was theatrical enough for you, dear.

FRAN BERNOULLI - NO CONTROL / ONE DIRECTION

“i just can’t get enough of you the pedal’s down, my eyes are closed. no control” did i pick this song because you’re a race car driver and it made me giggle… yes, and because i haven an uncontrollable crush on you, fran. 

FRED FREDRICKSON - SAVE YOU TONIGHT / ONE DIRECTION

“i, i wanna save you. wanna save your heart tonight. he’ll only break ya. leave you torn apart inside.” fredzilla, my absolute favorite hero. i dedicate this to you. simple but effective.

FREDDY JONES - END OF THE DAY / ONE DIRECTION

GEORGIE FOXWORTH - SOUR DIESEL / ZAYN

GRACELYNN MOON - HAPPILY / ONE DIRECTION

this is my favorite one direction song, gracie and i’m giving it to you. so take care of it and understand that it’s upbeat sound reminds me of you and your cute behind.

HADES VASILIKAS - STOCKHOLM SYNDROME / ONE DIRECTION

you steal people. but if you stole me.. i’d fall in love. that’s all really.

HAVEN LEMOS - STEAL MY GIRL / ONE DIRECTION

HERCULES ZERVOUS - STRONG / ONE DIRECTION 

get it because you’re strong? hehe.

HOWL PENDRAGON - ILLUSION / ONE DIRECTION

IAN LIGHTFOOT - MAGIC / ONE DIRECTION

JACK FROST - LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW / LIAM

i’m sorry but i’m not sorry i chose this song for you, jack. feel free to hate me forever. 

JIM HAWKINS - WE MADE IT / LOUIS

KIARA SANTUCCI - NOBODY COMPARES / ONE DIRECTION

LILO PELEKAI -  SHE’S NOT AFRAID / ONE DIRECTION

LOGAN TEAGUE - TEENAGE DIRTBAG / ONE DIRECTION

LUCA PAGURO - SUMMER LOVE / ONE DIRECTION

MAEL CALCIFER - FIREPROOF / ONE DIRECTION

“i’m feeling something deep inside. hotter than a jet stream burning up.” i’d only want to be fireproof for you, mael. there is just something about you that wins my heart. i’d walk through fire for you.

MAVIS VADUVA - 

MEG DIMITRIOU - SHE / HARRY 

MOLLIE SILVER - KISS YOU / ONE DIRECTION

MONTY MCQUEEN - ROCK ME / ONE DIRECTION

“hit the pedal heavy metal, show me you care.” not only do i want you to rock me, monty. the only reason i chose this song is because i have a nascar inspired shirt for this and it reminds me of you. 

NALA OMITA - NEW ANGEL / NIALL HORAN

NUKA LEU - PILLOWTALK / ZAYN

ORION BARTHOLOMEW - KIWI / HARRY 

orion, are we sure you’ve never had a woman accuse you of being her baby daddy? either way, this songs vibe just makes sense for you, dear.

PENELOPE HAINLINE - GIRL ALMIGHTY / ONE DIRECTION

“she floats through the room on a big balloon. some say she’s such a fake that her love is made up.” penny, you are aware you’re the literal coolest girl in the world this song just proves it more. 

PHILIP CHARMONT - WOLVES / ONE DIRECTION

REAGAN CYMBELINE - SUNFLOWER VOL 6 / HARRY

“sunflower my eyes want you more than a melody.” reagan, besides the fact you’re a literal walking and talking sunflower there is just a sweet feeling i get when i hear this song and its the same feeling i get when i think of you. 

RITA HOLDEN - ONLY ANGEL / HARRY 

SADIE TEAGUE - KILL MY MIND / LOUIS

SIMBA SANTUCCI - TIO / ZAYN

SHAGGY ROGERS  - WHAT A FEELING / ONE DIRECTION

SOPHIE HATTER - ADORE YOU / HARRY

THACKERY BINX - SMALL TALK / NIALL

VITANI LEU - MIDNIGHT MEMORIES / ONE DIRECTION

“tell me that i’m wrong but i do what i please.” vitani, if anyone in elias is gonna say fuck you i’m doing what i want.. it’s you. 

VELMA DINKLEY  - BACK FOR YOU / ONE DIRECTION

VIDIA BELLEFONTE - SHE / ZAYN

WALLY AXIOM - PERFECT / ONE DIRECTION

WILL TURNER - LIKE I WOULD / ZAYN

#waltmeme

[farfarawaygirl]

So Jesse mentioned in an interview that When you have something that could potentially be taken away, you always want it more.

And we know Greg is going to be in the next episode, do you think we’ll get jealous Matt like with Grainger and Sylvie at Molly’s, or are we going to get sad and longing Matt because he believes sylvie is moving on and he can’t do anything about it.

Oh! This is a good one, thanks nonny!

I wouldn’t be totally surprised if there is no sexy times between Sylvie and Greg, and there is just the illusion of a relationship. Like, maybe some drink sharing at Molly’s and extended eye contact, but nothing further. Because, Sylvie is more aware of her own feelings, so she may not follow through with Greg, but be able to recognize she isn’t ready to move on. Two episodes seems like too short a time for Sylvie to ‘move on’. She’s not one to jump into bed without thought, excepting Roman.

I think we are going to see apologetic Matt. I hope he steps up and takes ownership of his actions, and doesn’t allow the distance between them to grow again. I think Matt might move past the sad stage and actively try to repair their friendship. He fully acknowledged to Severide that other people are not filling the void that Sylvie’s absence creates. We have never seen Matt like this!

The game changer here is that Sylvie called time on the space. But - she did that not having the whole picture. Now she knows, and I’m more interested in how she will react than Matt.

I can see the heat between Sylvie and Greg being turned up, but I also kind of think that Matt might try and insert himself. Like, what if he joined their table at Molly’s? What if he steamrolls the date? I’d rather see this!

Of course, there is what I want, what I can predict, and what will happen... so, we have to wait!

#brettsey #matt casey #sylvie brett #chicago fire #sylvie brett x matt casey #it’s always been you #look at all the ways you could break my heart

[pixiegrl]

I’m Back in My Body

Luke has a conversation with KayKay that pushes him to re-consider his own gender identity.

Hello all. This was born out of @daydadahlias and I chatting about KayKay in their latest fic and Jess reminded me of part of this series, where I had KayKay come out as non-binary and in turn, it helped Luke come out as non-binary. KayKay uses she/they pronouns and Luke uses he/they pronouns. So thank Jess for pushing me to finish this part of the series. I’ve been thinking about Luke’s gender in this series for a while and Jess gave me the push i needed to explore it. 

Big thanks to @tigerteeff for many things: the original push to write this series, to keep going with this series, for the encouragement of having Luke and KayKay be non-binary. Heath has inspired many parts of this series and I love them for it. Also thanks to @lifewasradical, for the help on this doc and the constant love and support I really wouldn't be half the writer I am without you I love you thanks for putting up with me. And to Mandie, Molly, Brooke and Meg for reminding me to do what I love and listening to me while I ranted about writing. Love you guys.

on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29793279

As far as days go, it’s a pretty average Tuesday. Ashton’s out doing some music things with his friend Matt and Michael and Calum are doing their own weird MikeyandCal things that had sounded vaguely close to sexual. Luke had pouted about being left until Ashton had kissed him and told him it was healthy to spend time apart. Luke doubts it, but it also gives him some free time to go hang out with (harass) Sierra and KayKay at the store. 

Luke shows up close to noon, blowing through the door in a floral sundress and heeled gold boots. It had been one of those mornings, when Luke had looked at all of his pants and felt uncomfortable at the thought of anything masculine. The weather’s nice enough for sundresses now, a relief to Luke’s scratchy brain when he’d put it on. It’s a dress Sierra recommended once, all soft pinks and bright flowers and he wants Sierra to see it. 

Sierra’s standing at the counter, clicking around on her laptop. She grins when she spots Luke, waving him over.

“Luke! Just the person I was hoping to see. I’m putting the final touches on those photos you wanted for Ashton’s gift. Come look!” She waves him over. Luke grins, crossing the store to lean over the counter and look at her computer. 

Luke looks good in them, propped up and posed on the couch they’d used, in his bed (which had taken some convincing to get Ashton out of the house long enough without him suspecting what was going on). Luke looks soft and delicate, pink lips and soft curls and wrapped in lace and bows.

“They look so good, Si. How’d you manage to make me look so good?” 

“Thank KayKay. Without them taking the photos, they wouldn’t look so good. I can only do so much in editing. You’re easy to photograph and KayKay took such good photos of you.”

“I’m not a particularly good model. KayKay’s just really good.”

“Give yourself some credit Luke,” Sierra says, smacking Luke on the arm. He blushes. 

“Where is KayKay anyway?”

“In the back. Why don’t you go see them?” Sierra says, going back to the laptop. Luke nods, rounding the counter and going behind the curtain. KayKay’s sitting at the table in the back on a computer. KayKay glances up at Luke and that’s when he notices the name badge. It has KayKay’s name on it, but under that is listed they/them. Luke stops.

“Hey Luke,” they say smiling, holding their hand out to Luke. Luke sits down next to them, looking down at the name badge.

“Hey KayKay. Sierra was just showing me the photos. Are the pronouns new?” Luke blurts out, questions running through his mind. 

“No. Some days are just more they days and today is one of them, so I put my pronouns on my nametag. No confusion that way.”

“What do you mean they days?” 

“I’m non-binary Luke. Sometimes I have days where I feel comfortable being a woman and some days I don’t feel gender connected at all.”

“I...I didn’t know about that,” Luke says, quietly. The words stick with him, something about the feeling about them sitting heavy in his chest. He can’t place what it is about what KayKay’s said that’s sticking with him, but he’s just on the edge of it as he stares at their face.

“Did you really not know I was non-binary?” 

“I guess I just never paid attention to some of the cues or the pronouns you two used or whatever. I feel so stupid now.” 

“If you had misgendered me, I would have said something.” 

“What does it mean?” 

“What does what mean?” 

“Being non-binary. What does it mean for you?” 

KayKay shrugs, pushing a strand of hair behind their ear. Luke tracks the movement, trying to focus on it, to stop the panic in his own chest that he can’t place. 

“I just don’t always feel right in my own body. Sometimes I wake up and I feel okay. I feel like this is who I am. That I’m a woman and it’s okay. That that’s how I want to present myself and be seen by the world as on those days. Some days I wake up and I know it’s not one of those days. I know it’s not going to be a day where I feel right with myself. I feel a disconnect from the person I am. Sometimes feeling right with myself means I don’t feel like a woman. I just feel like me, no gender attached. It changes how I present myself, how I want the world to see me. Sometimes I don’t want to be seen at all. I just want to exist without anyone labeling me or who I am. Some days I don’t mind the labels. Some days I’m indifferent. Some days it feels like I can’t handle it if someone gives me a gendered label and I have to correct them. Everyone’s different but that’s how I feel,” they say, smiling over at Luke, soft and slow. Luke swallows, feels his chest tighten a little bit. 

“Oh,” Luke whispers, wrinkling up his nose. A lot of what they’re saying feels a little too close to home for Luke. The feeling of unrest in their body, of not feeling connected to the image they’re putting on. How the idea of how other people’s perception was wrong to how they were feeling. It all feels too close to how Luke feels. The sense of unease on some days when interviewers would call them all boys. The fact that the lingerie and dresses blur the lines of who Luke is. That no matter how nice it is, seeing the look of want and desire on Ashton’s face when he sees what Luke’s wearing, it was never about that. It was always about Luke’s ability to breathe, the warmth in his chest, the feeling of security he got whenever he put it all on. It was always about how he felt like it was coming home, getting to see himself in the mirrors, see the delicate lines and soft angles, crying the illusion of softness and femininity to his body, the tightness easing when he sees himself in the mirrors. Luke thinks he might be crying, feels the pressure at the back of his eyes.

“Luke, have you really never thought about this before?” KayKay asks, voice soft. Luke turns to face them, sees the look of concern on their face. Luke just shakes his head, pressing his face into his crossed arms. He’s trying so hard not to cry, doesn’t want KayKay to see him like this, even if they’re his friend. He hates when anyone who isn’t Ashton sees him at his lowest. 

“I guess I didn’t want to. I had one teenage panic about my sexuality. I already had the crisis about wearing lingerie and the dresses and everything else. I have had so many fucking crisises. I’m supposed to be happy now, why can’t I just be happy with who I am,” Luke mumbles. He sniffs, trying to stop the tears from flowing. KayKay sighs, scooting closer till they’re pressed against Luke’s side. They wrap their arms around him in a pseudo hug, resting their head on top of his. 

“Luke, honey, describe to me again how you feel when you wear everything?”

“Happy. I feel so happy. I put the first pair of panties on and it just felt right. I haven’t fit right in my own body since I had my growth spurt when I got all broad and tall. I used to hate looking at myself because I felt too big and masculine and I just miss feeling delicate and it did that. It made me feel delicate and lovely and I felt like I could breath. And I have some days where just wearing them underneath my shirts and trousers are enough, where I feel masculine and that’s okay. But I have some days, where I have to wear it all. I have to put on the dress and the heels and I go out in all of it, where I want to deck myself out, I want to be as feminine as possible. I had someone call me Miss in the store once,” Luke says. KayKay hums. 

“How did you feel?” 

“About?” 

“Her perception of you.” 

Luke pauses, considering it. He hasn’t thought about the incident in months. It was one of the few days where he’s gotten dressed up and gone out in public without any of the guys and without going to Sierra and KayKay’s store. He’d woken up feeling itchy in his own skin, kept pulling on layers, the bra and panties not doing anything on their own. He’d had to put on a whole thing, long flowing summer dress and wedges, makeup to match, until he’d felt comfortable enough to look in the mirror. He’d gone to Ulta and ended up poking around the makeup until a sales associate had come over, called him Miss, asked if he needed anything. She’d asked for his name and without thinking he’d said Liz. He doesn’t know what made him say it, knows that even if he had said Luke no one would have cared, but something in the moment made him want to be feminine. He’s never told anyone this before, took the memory home with him. He never even told Ashton about it, the way the feeling of it had settled in his chest, having someone look at him and see feminine.

“It felt okay. Having someone see me and see feminine it just felt so good. I have to be Stage Luke all the time, that it just felt nice to have someone see me and not wonder. But I don’t feel female enough either, ” Luke says. 

“Maybe that’s what it means for you. For me, being non-binary means I have some days where I feel like a woman, like that’s who I am and some days where I just feel like I’m not, where I don’t feel connected to my gender at all. For you, maybe it means some days you feel more masculine and comfortable being a man and sometimes you don’t feel that way at all. Maybe some days you feel more feminine.” 

“Is that allowed?” 

“Luke sweetie, it’s you. It’s all about how you perceive yourself, what you think of yourself as. There’s no right way or wrong way to be non-binary. That’s the beauty of it. It’s all up to you,” Kaykay says. Luke rolls the words around in his head, thinking about them. Thinks about what it means to have a word to describe how he’s feeling, the sense of who he is. Luke’s never felt all the way “female” exactly, but he does have days where that feels closer to who he is than “male” does. 

“Is it?”

“It is. It’s all a personal experience. That’s the wonderful thing about personal gender experiences. They’re unique to each person,” KayKay says, smiling at Luke, squeezing his arm. Luke smiles at them, pressing his face into their shoulder. 

“I think today is one of those days for me. I woke up and I thought about what I wanted to wear today and the idea of anything masculine made me feel uncomfortable. I didn’t feel comfortable until I went through my whole routine.”

“So maybe today is a they day,” KayKay says softly. Luke rolls the words around in his head.

“I think maybe it is. I think today I want to try it,” Luke says softly. KayKay nods. It’s different to think about, trying to wrap their head around it, but it feels good. Thinking about themselves like that, removing the idea of being one or the other and just existing. 

“I’m proud of you Lu. I’m here if you need anything,” KayKay says, kissing them on the temple. Luke smiles, turning to face KayKay.

“Thanks.”

“Anytime. Now, I heard there were photos to show you. Come on, let’s gush about how pretty you are,” KayKay says, pulling Luke to their feet. Luke grins. It feels right, something about it just feels right.

***

When Luke gets home, Ashton’s car is already in the driveway. Luke sits in the car for a bit, tapping their fingers against the steering wheel. They’ve been thinking about the conversation since talking to KayKay, how to talk to Ashton about it. Luke doesn’t know if it’s too soon or whatever to talk to Ashton about how they’re feeling, but Luke wants Ashton to know. They want Ashton to know they’re exploring themselves and what it means to Luke. Luke’s nervous about how Ashton’s going to respond to it, but it’s Ashton. Luke’s pretty sure there’s nothing they could really do to upset Ashton at this point, easy-going, loving Ashton.

Luke turns off the car engine, leaving the car and heading up the steps to their front door.

“Hey Ash,” Luke calls, coming through the front door. They hear the sounds of Petunia’s nails on the floor, rushing to the door to demand attention from Luke. Luke gladly gives it to her, dropping to their knees and cooing at her.

“In the kitchen darling,” Ashton calls. Luke scoops up Petunia, making their way through the house, finding Ashton at the kitchen table. He’s clicking around on his laptop, frowning.

“What’s up Ash?”

“Looking for tickets to Australia. Fucking complicated to find anything on short notice.”

“Not expensive?”

“We’re rockstars baby,” Ashton teases, looking up at Luke. He’s wearing his glasses, smiling enough that his dimples are showing. Luke giggles, setting Petunia down so that they can climb into Ash’s lap, press a kiss to his lips. Ashton returns the kiss happily, squeezing Luke’s hips, letting Luke sling their arms around Ashton’s shoulders.

“You look nice,” Ashton says.

“Thanks. Felt like a good day for it. Went to see Sierra and KayKay.”

“How was it?”

“I wanted to talk to you about something,” Luke says, figuring it’s better to get it over with. Ashton furrows his brow, letting Luke settle into his lap before turning away from his computer to face him.

“What’s wrong sweetheart?”

“KayKay was talking to me about how they’re non-binary and I think I might be too. They were describing it and I just...I felt so connected to that. I don’t always feel right in my body. Sometimes I feel like Luke, like I’m okay in my own body, and sometimes I just don’t. I don’t feel quite female, but sometimes I just feel more feminine and that’s how I want the world to see me. I’m not sure what it all means, but I want to explore it.” 

“Oh Luke sweetie, of course you can. Whatever you need darling, I’m right here for you. Is today one of those days?”

“Yeah. I think it is. It just feels like it,” Luke says. Ashton nods, face open and understanding. Luke doesn’t have the words to keep describing how they’re feeling over and over again today, but Ashton’s easy acceptance and love feels good. It reminds Luke that they don’t have to figure everything out today, that they have time. They have time and they have the words to describe how they’re feeling and they have Ashton. Everything else will fall into place after that.

***

Luke waits a couple weeks before sitting down with Michael and Calum to talk about it. Luke spends the time between their revelation and sitting down to talk to the guys. It gives Luke some time to explore what their gender means for them, wrap their head around the words. KayKay is sweet about it, giving Luke answers and resources where they fail to have the answer. Between KayKay’s support and Ashton’s easy acceptance, it’s helped Luke figure out what they want to do. Luke’s still not sure how to come out to their family or even to their fans, but Luke knows that the only way to do that is to talk to Michael and Calum. Luke hasn’t come out to anyone except for Ashton yet. It feels right though, taking the first leap and telling the guys. Luke’s hoping that telling their closest friends will ease some of the tension and uncertainty of having to tell everyone else.

Ashton and Luke set up lunch with Michael and Calum, invited them over. It felt better, doing it in their own home, in a place of comfort. Luke’s nervous though, has been since they got up that morning, got dressed. Luke’s put on another sundress for the day, opting to blur their gender lines again, on a day where it feels the most appropriate. 

Michael and Calum showed up about an hour again, bringing some fruit salad with them to lunch. Luke’s been trying to work up the courage throughout all of lunch, find a way to work it naturally into the conversation. There hasn’t been a time yet and the longer Luke waits, the more nervous they get. Ashton’s been wonderful, pressed close to Luke and squeezing their thigh to comfort them. It’s just about the end of lunch when Luke finally finds a natural place in the conversation to finally bring it up.

“I have something to tell you guys,” Luke says when the conversation dies down.

“You’re leaving Ashton for Troye Sivan,” Michael says, tone teasing.

“I’m not...what is that the first person you think of?” Luke asks. Michael shrugs.

“You’ve decided to leave the band to become a mime,” Calum chimes in, grinning.

“Okay, I’m never letting either of you guess ever again,” Luke says, swatting at Ashton as he continues to laugh with Michael and Calum.

“Alright, alright what did you want to tell us?” Michael asks, when he finally stops. Luke frowns, lump in their throat. Ashton reaches over, squeezing their hand. 

“I’m non-binary. Everyone’s gender expression for identifying is different, but for me it means that someday I feel masculine and comfortable being Luke and being male. Somedays, I feel more feminine. I don’t want to be a woman necessarily, but I want to be seen as more feminine. I want to be less gendered,” Luke says, swallowing, chest tight. Michael reaches across the table, holding his hand out palm up, signaling for Luke to take his hand. Luke reaches out, letting Michael grab their hand and squeeze.

“What can we do for you?” Calum asks.

“Some days I want to use he/him pronouns and some days I want to use they/them pronouns. I’ll start telling you guys in the morning how I feel, especially if we’re doing interviews or public appearances, so I don’t get misgendered or have anyone refer to me with gendered words. I don’t want to change my name, I like Luke. I just want to adjust how the world perceives me. And I don’t know how to come out online or what to say to our management,” Luke says. 

“Fuck management. You gotta do what’s important for you. Say whatever you want online, we’ll back you up,” Michael says, all determination and indignation. 

“But what about our fans? Or the online response? I still have to worry about that,” Luke points out.

“Fuck them if they don’t want to respect you. I don’t need those fans,” Calum says. Luke swallows trying to blink back their tears. Michael and Calum leave their seats, wrapping Luke up in a hug and pressing soft kisses to their head. Luke knows it’s not that simple, can’t just say fuck it to what management will think or how their fanbase will respond. Luke knows it can’t be simple, coming out, expressing their gender publicly. Maybe the first step is for Luke to change their pronouns on their twitter and instagram bios, letting the world find out as they check their page. Getting to see the fan reaction that way would be incredible, pouring out support for them and letting them know how valid they are without having to make a big declaration about it. Luke knows it’s going to be interviews and explanations, trying to talk to people about who they are, but it’s nice. The easy love and acceptance from their friends, knowing that no matter what, they have Ashton and Michael and Calum on their side. The world’s a little brighter for Luke, getting to be themselves, getting to be happy, getting to do it all with their friends. Right here, wrapped up in the guys and their hug, the world feels brighter and full of love and possibilities. 

#5 seconds of summer #lashton #luke hemmings #ashton irwin #kaykay blaisdell #non-binary character #nb kaykay #non binary luke #its just gender exploration and soft love #both platonic and romantic #luke deserves to be loved wholly and completely and have people accept them #my writing

[magickedhat]

@theaterism​ asked:   !! hello hello, what are some things wren remembers the most about being the illusionist’s apprentice?

”Some things? I could write a whole book, honestly, ‘bout all the stuff she tried to teach me. But that’d be wasted effort, apparently.

“Did you know, magic can’t actually be learned through books? It’s too vague for that, too weird for words. You gotta go out and actually live it. It’s like... y’know, reading a book in general. What you’ll read is only a piece of what’s really out there, narrowed down even further ‘cause you’re seeing it through another dude’s eyes. You haven’t seen any of it yourself, haven’t, like... felt it, y’feel? Magic is a lot about feeling, honestly, like feelin’ the air whip at you as you ride a broom or jump from really high up. A book could describe that to me, sure, but it wouldn’t be anywhere near the real thing.

“Estella thinks that’s why magic has lessened in power over the centuries. People out there looking for shortcuts and forgettin’ to really live. She told me this so, so many times, I think she just... believed I looked like someone who liked shortcuts. She’s not wrong, that much is true.

“She... did have a magic book. Not a book on magic. Just a magic book. The difference is, like... As she put it: a book cannot teach you proper magic, and if you discover one that does, it’s in your best interest to destroy it. And you can bet your ass we destroyed it.. Ah... the whole book was just ink, to be honest. I think. ‘Cause I did look at it, obviously, and she let me look at it ‘cause she knew I would’ve just stolen it otherwise. And, like... it literally was just pages and pages painted black. Wet ink. It left a stain on my finger for days to come. But, like... there wasn’t anything particularly unsettling about it.

“Anyway, we destroyed it either way, as soon as we got the chance. We made this weird-ass bathbomb-- y’know those DIY bathbomb things they sell out there? It was somethin’ like that, but with our own herbs and a bit of her own magic. Pretty sure there was molly in it? Like, that’s what my mom used in a lot of her recipes, so there might have been some in there. It’s like, the standard herb for healing and protection, I think. But yeah, like, we filled this whole bathtub with water, threw in the bathbomb and the book. Had to reassure Hugues that no, it would not ruin the bathtub...

“... guess what: it ruined the bathrub. Could not even dream of showering in there, with all the ink and green-ish bathbomb mambo-jumbo. We had to scrub the stuff away for the rest of the evening and Lou would not let it go for the next few months. At least the book was disintegrated, though. Along with my spine.

“Hm... Her illusions feel a bit like dreaming. It feels real in the moment, but looking back, you’re all like... ‘the fuck? was i just flying north with a team of geese, or did i have too many drinks at the bar?’ Things like that. When I was smaller, she’d get me these, uh... glitter jars? Those water glitter jars, she’d get me them to calm me down. Cool part is, she also used to charm them, so I could get the glitter to create shapes and have it move in certain ways, and it was, like, a cool visual stim. Sorta like a mobile game. Guess it was better than stealin’ her phone to play games half the time.

“She actually has a degree on psychology. It’s not uncommon to find performers here with higher education, not really --- hell, my own surgeon is a literal clown over at the circus. Anyways, Estella --- she mashes what she learned in school with her own magic. She can look into someone’s subconscious for a lil’ while. She does that to costumers and we’d tend to avoid creating illusions that would, like, tap into their fears. It sucks ass when she looks into my subconscious, though. ‘s like readin’ someone’s diary, for fuck’s sake...

“Uh... Did she try to teach me actual magic? Yes. Did it work? Debatable.

“Okay, okay, in my defense, I just never had the right mindset for the things she wanted me to do. Like... one time, she wanted me to turn the black stripes on ours tents into water---imaginary water, illusions an’ all that---and the gold stripes into climbing flowers. I just-- could not do it. Something ‘bout the illusion would go wrong and the entire thing would fall apart, and I’d have to start over again and get the meanest headache.

“She did say it was partly because of my dad. He taught me to rely most on expectations when messin’ around with illusions, what people assume will happen, and like, that solidified my magic really damn well, so I was always clinging to it. So... completely fantastical things that are conjured from, uh... from within, those are just not my thing. I can do little things, though, like those little fire butterflies. Worked my ass off to get ‘em to fly right. At least they come out lookin’ good.

“She was... kinda absent, I guess. Not as a teacher, she always had plenty to teach me. Neither as a babysitter--- oh, no, if I were getting into trouble in the circus, she would find out and she would lecture me about it. But just like... Imagine we’d be workin’ on some new theory. I’d be practisin’ on the stage creating all sorts of spectacles, and she’d just... fall asleep. Right there, on the seats. I’d wake her up, and she’d be like, ‘don’t worry about it, I’m watching, keep going’ --- yeah, sure, and I’m the queen of England on vacation. God... It was annoying as hell. 

“Generally, though... she wasn’t bad as a teacher. I don’t think she ever expected to be one. She mostly just did it ‘cause dad asked her to. She just... didn’t have anything that I really wanted to learn. And to be honest, most of my clearer moments with her are durin’ dinners and holidays, when Hugues would be cookin’ somethin’ good and Lou and I would steal food and Estella would pretend she didn’t see nothin’. I like her a lot better as a family friend than a teacher, is what I’m saying.

“I just wish she wasn’t as secretive as dad likes to be.”

#theaterism #ic. ◜♣ / ❛ 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐩! ❜◞ #asks. ◜♣ / ❛ 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐡𝐚𝐭. ❜◞ #aaa hello thank u so much for the question!! #i've wanted to talk abt estella for a while and this was such a good opportunity! #they didn't share much of what they learned but instead stuck to what they Remember most clearly #which obviously isnt the lessons cdhuiadv #i did Not have the power to add description too and yet somehow it still turned out so long oh no......... #but yes again thank u for sending this!! <3

[journal-of-an-outlaw]

Red Dead Secret Cupid

Happy Valentine’s day @boedkerillustrations ! I hope you enjoy your angsty piece about Arthur, it was fun to write!

Arthur leaned up against a brick wall, enjoying the shade on the hot summer day at the park in Saint Denis. Droves of people swirled around him, mingling and mixing together with the same ebb and flow of a river moving leisurely around a rock. To be honest Arthur enjoyed the indirect attention. It allowed him to watch the people fret over little details of their day that seemed oh so important in the moment but tomorrow would be forgotten. The colors of their dresses. Who was coming to dinner. Where they should vacation next. 

Blah, blah blah. 

Talk was a worthless currency to a walking dead man. It didn’t matter. But stealing these little moments away drowned out the other words that constantly rang in his ears. 

Get yourself somewhere warm and dry. Progressive disease. Coughing. Blood. I’m so sorry, son. 

He pulled out a cigarette and held the lit match a few inches away, frozen between two impossible choices. Arthur knew he had no time left, that much the good doctor made clear. Did he spend his days burning the candle at both ends because there was an end in sight? Or did he cautiously move forward, save any and all strength he had to help the gang and those living longer than him?

But he took too long to decide. The match burned out and he dropped it and the cigarette both to the ground and crushed them with his boots out of habit. It seemed all his choices were made for him lately. He had lost his control. But that didn’t matter anymore. He knew that now. 

“Need a light?”

The gentle voice startled Arthur. A woman about his age moved along the wall, resting in the same pose and staring out into the crowd. The clothes were new, but that face he would recognize anywhere. 

“Lydia Jacobs. I’ll be damned.”

“Good to see you too, Morgan. Been too long,” her smile stretched wide and Arthur couldn't help but give one back as her brown eyes crinkled at the sides just like they always had. 

The pair met years ago but their time together was brief. Alone and desperate, she cornered Dutch in a bar begging for a safe place to lay her head for awhile, not knowing what she was getting herself into. Dutch had a soft spot for women in need. He liked to play the savior. He brought Lydia back to the camp he and Arthur shared and watched the two connect instantly. Lydia was no gun slinger, in fact she had been left behind as bait for another group for being too posh, but over the weeks learned enough to defend herself if needed. 

An expensive perfume wafted Arthur’s way with hints of jasmine and vanilla. He breathed in the pleasant scent and tried to remember if it was what she used to wear all those years ago but he couldn't quite recall the specific notes.

“It’s been, what, nearly ten years since I saw you? What are you doing here?” 

“I’m actually hunting a bounty. I know, I know, strange to hear,” she laughed at his bewildered expression. “But it’s a good income and I get to leave the city behind.”

“Though you’d be married, living in the city by now.” 

“Nah, that wasn’t the life for me.” 

Arthur watched her curiously, her eyes darting away at her words to look at anything but him. His own slanted but he was distracted as she scratched the back of her neck, her gloves catching his attention. 

“You kept those old things?” 

He hesitantly reached out for the white leather, time and use wearing them down to look much less like the fine things he purchased when he thought himself in love. Lydia smiled and held her hands out to admire them. Arthur was twenty-seven when he found the gloves and knew right away the woman warming his bed back at camp had to have them. A rose pattern etched across the backs made them unique, he had never seen anything like it. She squealed at the gift. But that hadn’t kept her from leaving the next week when the time came. 

Watching her now Arthur was reminded that Lydia’s hands were no longer soft and delicate. That the skin was probably hardened from years of gun fights and horse reins. He never forgot what they got up to when the roughest thing she touched was his bed sheets in the throes of something a bit more reckless. Those memories made him blush and he coughed to hide his deepening cheeks. 

“‘Course I kept them. One of my most prized possessions,” her words broke Arthur or his reprieve and brought him back to the present.

As Arthur opened his mouth a cough burned his throat, his question dying on his tongue as he hacked in pain. He turned in embarrassment and shame, the disease inside of him bursting at the surface no matter how hard he fought to keep it contained and in control. Lydia’s brow pulled together in concern but he waved her off with a gruff. 

“‘M fine,” Arthur wheezed. 

“You don’t sound it.” Her response was flat and sarcastic. “We should move somewhere else, there are too many eyes here.”

Together they made their way away from the midday crowd gathered for picnics and social gossiping in the town park and towards the outskirts of Saint Denis, passing the tailors before crossing the street and continuing on. Lydia was headed towards the garden house when Arthur grabbed her arm to stop, needing to lean against a fence for support as he began coughing again. 

“Arthur, have you seen a doctor?”

The words were meant innocently enough but they sent panic burning below Arthur’s skin. He gripped absentmindedly at his ribs, half wishing he could either rip out the infested organs pumping life into his failing body or that anyone listening would answer his prayer. He didn’t want to die. The thought terrified him. But even he knew his bed was made and it was time to lie in it. 

“I fell,” he spoke softly, guilt and pride not allowing his voice to carry far beyond his companion. “Down some street by the docks and a fella carried me to the doctor. Felt like a horse stepped on my chest.” For a moment the sunlight reflected off Lydia’s sweet brown eyes and her dark skin and Arthur was lost in the beauty that wasn’t tainted by his bad decisions. “He said it’s, uh, tuberculosis.” Lydia tried to control the sharp inhale to hide her emotions. “All those bad deeds finally caught up to me.”

“Arthur,” sympathy laced her words. “You know that ain’t fair. You put a lot of good out into this world.”

“Did I?” The laugh barely passed his lips. “The view from here is…”

Dismal. Petrifying. Bleak. 

“We all have a limited time on this earth. I know things have always felt a bit out of your control but what you did mattered.” Arthur snorted half-heartedly. “I know I can’t change your mind in one conversation. I won’t try. But please, know that you saved me. I am living proof that you did something good.”

“Ms. Jacobs, no offense but you’re hunting bounties for a living. That ain’t what I’d call -”

“I am happy, and that is what matters most. I owe that to you. Spent my whole life doing what I love and I don’t regret it for a second. Which does bring me to why I’m here,” Lydia laughed as she pulled a folded up paper out of her pocket. “I’m hunting a bounty who’s, well, you.”

Arthur took the poster and examined the drawing. “Could have made it something more flattering. Doesn’t even look like me.”

“Especially not now.” Lydia meant the words as a joke, but silently cursed as she froze.

Arthur Morgan spent most of his life running. After thirty-five years he was finally slowing down. The bags beneath his eyes were dark and his cheeks hollowed. He didn’t just look tired, he looked…

“Well,” Arthur sounded dejected. “At least I know you’ll use the money well.”

“I’m not bringing you in, cowboy. I just came to warn you.” His eyebrows raised at her words. “Not only do we have a history, Arthur, but now it’s not...I won’t put a sick man in jail.”

At least she didn’t dance around the subject. Arthur didn’t want to hide behind the fact that TB was a disease nearly no one survived. He knew the odds. Not only did the thought of ceasing to exist send terror through him but he worried about those he was leaving behind. 

Would John and Abigail ever have a home? Would Jack grow up like his father? Would Molly ever leave Dutch’s side?

His mentor and brother had been...different of late. Aggressive. Rash. Frightened. Arthur would never admit to anyone the flashes he saw in Dutch’s eyes when a decision came down to the wire but his heart recognized what it was. At first he ignored it. They were simply the emotions brought about by the decay of time and a friendship that passed every test they had hurled at them, nothing more. But more and more Arthur’s conscience would not allow the debate to happen; his words lashing out before he could think through the consequences of berating Dutch alone or in front of others and often had to hear how much he betrayed him by speaking up. 

Subconsciously Arthur pushed a thumb across his palm to distract himself from the tightening of his throat and the tension behind his eyes. In truth he was terrified. There was no use fighting, but that didn’t take away his instinct to try. 

“Not sick, Lydia. Dying.”

“How do you feel?”

Gently she took one of his hands in her own as they stood against the fence on the outskirts of the city. Life buzzed all around them; kids playing games, animals eating grass, adults doing chores. The mundane tasks made Arthur want to shake these people awake. Didn’t they know there was only so much time on this earth? Why were they wasting it hanging up clothes? That didn’t matter, none of it did. They should be running away, taking those they loved with them, and ensuring they prospered in happiness and love. Not money or things. 

“Doesn’t matter how I feel. Just have to keep...keep…” His words cut off with another cough. Lydia’s heart broke for the man she once loved and fought back tears of her own, the shuddering gasps of Arthur’s laboured breathing shattering the illusion she had built up from her memories. This man had no fight left in him. Not for himself. “I got people to take care of.” 

Lydia nodded sympathetically, watching his resolve harden. Arthur pulled his shoulders back and pushed off the fence to stand tall once again. 

“You’ll do it Arthur, I’m sure of it. They’ll be okay,” something caught Arthur’s eye over Lydia’s shoulder as she spoke and he tried to hide the flash of recognition on his face. “Someone you know?”

“Yeah, a friend. Lydia, I should…”

“Of course.” She glanced back to see a dark skinned man with two horses approaching. He wore a blue shirt and an apprehensive look. “Just know if you need me for anything Arthur, I’m only a letter away. If there’s anything I can do, anyone I can look after, if you need a place to run away to, please just…”

Her words trailed off with the realization this would be the last time she would see him in this life. Arthur was always a figure in the back of her mind who came to fruition every now and then. A reminder that the cards she was dealt didn’t have to be her only ones. And now, to know he was dying in such an awful way, it took everything she had not to break down into tears. 

“Sorry I couldn't help with that bounty, real shame he was gone before you got there.”

“Arthur,” she whispered.

But he waved a hand at her tone. “I’m nothing anymore. We both know I wouldn’t survive the way the world is going, seems I finally learned that myself. Just...promise me something, will you?” His blue eyes shimmered with life and Lydia found herself nodding right away, desperate to give this man’s last wish life. “Don’t, don’t waste what you have. People will try and tell you what they want from you, but it don’t matter. All of this is only worth it because you get to enjoy it for so long, so go out and do what matters and don’t listen to what other people want. In the end you’re the only one who shows up so just...do what matters to you. Whether it’s hunting bounties or taking care of someone or...I don’t know, picking berries or something. Leave your mark.”

Lydia couldn’t tell if it was the words of a wisened dying man or something she had been needing to hear but she felt changed. Her eyes followed as they rode away and off into the swamps, a silent goodbye with the tip of his hat the last sight of her friend. 

How could one interaction affect her so deeply? Did approaching death give him an insight to not only what brings true happiness but what was wasted time? Did he know she would be there that day?

One day, Lydia knew she would ask him. But for now she would take what he said to heart and try to live alongside the memory of someone history would forget.

#rdr secret cupid 2021 #rdr2 #arthur morgan #my writing #I keep reading this as stupid cupid #like that mandy moore song

[fan-clan-fun]

Clans of the Wood Ranks

On second thought, I just want the rank system looked over. Also because I’m frustrated at having to write the same thing over and over again (this is attempt four).

Yay! Good news is I figured out a workaround to finally access submissions and comment on them appropriately! Im so excited to read all about this!

Just know a lot of realistic cat behavior is taken into account, such as toms killing foreign kits and cats relying on their ears and nose for perception over their eyes.

When a cat of the Woodland Clans is born, they’re called kits or kittens. For the first month of life, they have minimal interaction outside of the nursery. The second and third months of life are generally spent playing and learning about clan culture through stories. Kittens four months old begin assisting other ranks that largely stay within camp. Upon five or six months old (depends on the maturity and size of the kittens), they can begin to help ranks that may be considered more dangerous. Cats are considered kittens until they are fully accepted within a rank, which usually happens between a year and a year and six months.

Interesting, I see you have done away with the apprentice rank. I feel like there are pros and cons with this. For one there isnt any illusions that kits are minors in every sense of the word, and it would be entirely inappropriate for them to hold certain responsibilities or expectations with relationships. But I can also see older kits being extra hurried to become warriors or the equivalent since being so much older than the younger kits but still being considered kits would be frustrating. I can certainly remember as a teenager  being annoyed when I was considered a child (even if I was still a minor and therefore technically a child).

A handful of cats take up the role of healers. They are to look after the health of cats within the clan and maintain a good supply of medicine in storage. While every cat in the clan gets basic medical training, these cats specialize in it and memorize remedies to every known injury and illness. Mollies also tend to double as midwives.

I like how this is worded, because it is important for the entire clan to have at least basic first aid, but also of course to have cats to specialize in it. I had always seen medicine cats to share like the medical side of birth, while older more experienced queens provided the emotional support, but I suppose these healers could do both. 

A handful of cats stay within camp as guardians. They are to protect camp, fight off predators and aggressors, and escort weaker members to other camps. Every cat does receive battle training, these cats also study strategy and the weak points of predators like wolverines, birds of prey, foxes, dogs, and coyotes. Tom guardians sleep with the rest of the clan and molly guardians sleep in the nursery.

I find it interesting you split up warriors into two groups. I have an image of some gorgeous big buff cats. And also female guardians protecting the nursery! Super cute.

Two or three cats within each clan are messengers. They stay within camp and are sent to camps of other clans when urgent matters need to be relayed. Only swift cats become messengers and must be disciplined in the art of remembering messages.

As nice as this is, I feel like the messengers wouldnt be able to be only messengers, as there isnt a constant need for messages to be carried (unless there is, Im just going off what I have been given). Maybe they are just some of the fastest hunters?

Seers are the one or two cats who are highly attuned to the earth, listening to her whispers and echoes. They can assist with daily life and have mates and bear kits, but must remain open to the earth’s voice. Many cats are born with an innate attunement to the voice and it’s partially hereditary. Commonly, a current seer’s kit, grandkit, or nibling will have this affinity.

I do like me some spiritual cats, I would love to hear more what they see about the earth!

Hunters is everyone else in the clan. They hunt for most of the food and patrol the borders, bringing friendly tidings from other clans. They take up the bulk of the population and have a wide array of personalities and skills.

Ah I see, so the Hunters are basically the warriors of the clan, with the guardians being like the equivalent of -claw cats being extra skilled in fighting

When a cat decides to bear kits, she can decide to move to the nursery at any time and become a mother. Because of the often stressful situations cats can get into, it’s imperative a pregnant mother remain calm lest complications will arise endangering her and her kits. Once they’re born, she will be with them at almost all times during their first month of life. After that, she can leave them for longer periods of time until they’re fully weaned. Once weaned, she can decide to stay with them until they’re all around six months old (when they’re kicked out of the nursery), or can return to her duties, checking up on them periodically.

Elders are the clan’s history and are just as protected as its future. They’re cats normally over a hundred months (eight or nine years) old, spending their days sleeping, bestowing wisdoms to all who ask of them, and gossiping on inter-clan politics and relationships.

The matriarch is the overseer of mothers and kittens. She will usually try to get restless pregnant mothers to calm down for a safer labor and look after the young kittens of nursing mothers when she needs me time. If any orphaned kittens are taken in, she will be their mother. In a way, all kittens born under her care are her kittens, and many young cats call her “Mother” alongside their own mother. She doesn’t even have to be fertile or have her own kits to be the matriarch; if she has a strong maternal instinct and knows a lot on mothers and kits and has the skill to back it up, she can be the matriarch.

I have had a similar role in one of my clans before, and I do really like it. Its something of the idea of a permanent queen, but only one and with a serious amount of authority in the clan.

The keeper is the diplomatic leader, not only in charge of maintaining friendly relations with other clans, but also other feline societies outside of the clans. Their job also includes relaying their diplomatic information to the leader and let members of the clan know when they should probably stop fraternizing with that sexy otherclan cat because tensions are high, so it’d be better if one of them moves to the other’s clan instead. A keeper is likely to have formerly been a hunter.

This is quite clever and makes me wonder about the existence of informants and primitive spy networks. 

The captain is the military leader, in charge of organizing a quick response when the lives of their cats are endangered. They are almost always a former guardian and normally a brilliant strategist. They are also in charge of overseeing the kittens’ battle training.

I appreciate that you have sort of deputies for the two major  ranks in the clan, which is nice because Im getting the vibe that these are fairly large clans, so the extra organization is helpful.

Lastly is the leader, the head of the clan. They are to make decisions for their clan as a whole based on the information gathered from their council of elders, senior clan members, seers, matriarch, keeper, and captain. Should the keeper or captain die, retire, or be exiled, the leader is to choose their replacement, knowing which cats are skilled for the role and who the clan would find a good decision. A leader is the final authority on all decisions, but the seers can authorize their overthrow if the clan is overall displeased with their rule and the seers receive an omen confirming this. A new leader is chosen upon their death, retirement, or exile through a vote of all adult cats between the matriarch, captain, and keeper. Everyone votes for who they are okay with being leader, not for who they prefer, so you can vote for everyone if you like everyone. The one with the highest votes wins. Ties should be non-violently resolved between the tied parties.

I like this because  it doesnt necessarily require votes for every decision, but there is a vote for a leader, which would then lead based on those votes and the advice of their council and others who are most familiar with different aspects of the clan. That said I can just imagine the shenanigans involved when it comes to an election, like do they campaign? What does a campaign look like? Are there any restrictions as to who can be voted for or is it just anyone? Has there been a time where a young and maybe inexperienced  leader was voted for? Its an intriguing possibility.

So yeah, I’d like to know what you think of this unusual setup for my clans. Thanks for taking the time to look it over!

This was lovely to look over! Sorry it took so long! Thanks for sending it in.

#warrior cats #clan culture #warriorsworldbuilding #submission