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#like even if they dont work out im fine with it
howelljenkins · 2 months ago
i have a lot to say about the culture surrounding coming out and how much i hate it but it basically all boils down to how coming out is framed as necessary and something you just do as soon as it’s “safe” when you’re really not obligated to come out at all. like you literally don’t have to. even if it is relatively safe you do not have to put yourself through a potentially traumatic experience because you think it’s part of the lgbt experience or a rite of passage or whatever. you don’t have to. that is an option.
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adamparrishes · 3 years ago
very Important pynch things to take away from the opal story:
ronan starts a fire in an outbuilding by accident so these two dumbass Gays are like YES, GOOD LETS THROW STUFF AT IT! pyromaniacs the both of them. but i can get behind it if it makes them WILD and JOYFUL. 
their frequent and very Long drives together! we all know they are parking up somewhere quiet and talking for hours and, lets be real, making out. also these drives are absolutely definitely no question about it what they do for dates pls like we all know they just like being alone peacefully together and this delivers. nice nice nice. 
they?? nap?? together??? they bundle themselves into sheets piled like thunderheads (?? what the fuck boys tidy up your sheets) and they NAP. adam is 5000% the big spoon to ronan’s soft as fuck (dont kid yourself lynch) small spoon. 
speaking of soft boy ronan lynch, i am? so proud of him??? dressed head-to-toe in leather, covered in a tattoo, swear boy ronan lynch has progressed! so! much! remember in trc when he was sad and he would hole himself away in his room on his own and drink ugh my poor Soft Gay, that was never gonna help. BUT NOW when he’s having a bad day he’s like you know what. i want to hold my bf’s hand and push my face into his neck and just stand here a while and that’s exactly what he does he doesn’t push it away, in fact he ASKS for it. catch me crying about it every 5 minutes until the day i die, thanks! 
and adam who is definitely more verbose and needs to talk things out when he’s bothered has clearly come to understand that this isn’t what ronan needs, that it doesn’t work for him. he’s come to understand what he DOES need, that he relies on touch, so he doesnt try to talk, he doesnt try to make ronan express what he’s feeling, which in that moment would only make things worse, he just quietly takes ronan’s hand, and puts his head of top of ronan’s when the latter pushes his face into his neck like a kitten. again, imma cry every 5 minutes until the day i die. 
this goes both ways though, it’s also really clear that ronan has taken the time to figure out what adam needs when he’s upset; that he needs to talk it out, and he needs to do some version of Dramatic Pacing, he needs to move and he needs action or some kind of gesture. ronan delivers this by talking it out. he reminds adam, who is very prone to being defeatist when something goes wrong, that things might look different but they’ll still be good, that he hasn’t failed, that its going to be fine. and he takes his shoes and socks off and walks with adam barefoot in the mud in the biggest and most Dramatic (you’re not the only Dramatic Gay adam, dont worry) display of ‘yo i’ve got your back’ ive ever seen. this is especially important as adam had just said he wouldn’t expect ronan to care, and ronan is like I CARE IM HERE WITH YOU WHATEVER YOURE DOING IM HERE. wow im?? i dont even know honestly its all Too Much. 
more hand holding!! watch me put this point 76 times because!!! they! hold! hands! this is very important to me ive been arguing they do for 945 years and now its canon thank you for your time! 
also canon confirmed is that ronan lynch talking about cabeswater is a turn on for adam parrish, my beautiful messy bisexual son, like we already knew he was on the sapiosexual side but reading that when ronan talked like ‘this’ adam stopped the Talking and started the Kissing was something i never knew i needed. 
adam coming and going p much whenever he pleases and doing so mostly with ronan’s car is?? very important to me. this boy wouldn’t take anything from anyone in trc, he hated staying somewhere that wasn’t his own, but now he’s rolling up to stay at a house that isn’t his, in a car that isn’t his, and frequently too. im so proud of him. 
when adam knows his time is winding down he stays at the barns even more and even gets pissed when he’s called into work oh how far we’ve come. 
ronan who loves his car more than is probably healthy offering it to adam so he can go to school i cry. 
when adam has walked a hundred million miles from work to the barns ronan gets him a glass of water because he’s such a kind and considerate boyfriend. what a good boy i love him. 
they have both grown and developed individually and together so fucking much but they are still the same sarky teenage boys who fell in love and this was so obvious in a lot of their exchanges (particularly when talking about cabeswater) and it made me feel all Fuzzy and Warm and 182/10 happier.
adam telling ronan it wasn’t okay with him that he doesn’t care about what happens to himself crushed my heart but its very important for ronan to hear verbally and clearly that there are people who love him and that he should care about himself because he’s worth it. 
yo friends they HOLD HANDS. 
they have two hands each and they hold them!!!!! 
fuck me up. 
ANYWAYS these two boys just spending the summer TOGETHER!!! being SILLY BOYS IN LOVE. making a pool which they splash around in and kiss in don’t think i didn’t notice that ohohoho and having bbqs and making up games. just carefree and happy and wanting to spend every minute together having fun shit shit shit. 
and they just are so? careful with each other! so gentle! they take care of each other and support each other and communicate and play and arghhhh. 
i am never going to be Okay. 
(p.s. they!!! hold!!! hands!!!)
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rifa · 2 years ago
A Few Things About Pillowfort
Alright so I’ve seen a LOT of opinions and incorrect information all over the place regarding the platform and Im sick of it. What a time to spread misinformation tumblr, never change.
I’m an extreme newbie on pillowfort but I wanted to clear up misconceptions and dumb talking points:
It Doesn’t ‘Cost Money’ in the way you keep suggesting
Pillowfort was a kickstarted platform and it is still in BETA (keep this in mind it’ll come up a lot) - It costs $5 to get a ‘key’ and enter. There are no subscription fees, no secret additional costs, its literally just $5. The cost is there to help support the building of the website, since the website is NOT owned by a giant company (like the one screwing us rn) so the money goes directly into supporting the platform.
I understand there is a barrier for people who are extremely poor or unable to easily make online purchases. They have stated on their twitter that they are looking into ways to make it more accessible right now with Tumblr shutting down the way it is. Also there have been people floating around willing to buy keys for friends, followers, mutuals, etc.
It’s not “Broken” or “Down” and it being offline for MAINTENANCE is a Good Thing
Pillowfort has been offline for a little bit because they are working on fixing security issues, yanno, making sure the website is safe and functioning for its users. Its unfortunate with the timing, considering how many of us are ready to pack up and leave now. They have said they are pushing to have it open Dec 4 or 5.
I’ve seen people say that their servers crashed, or that they dont trust a website that isn’t online 24/7 and thats all hogwash and you know it. Pillowfort is in BETA and they are still building functions and ironing out kinks, thats a GOOD thing. I would rather ride a rollercoaster that shuts down for maintenance for an hour every day rather than ride one that hasn’t been repaired until the tracks literally snap. Pillowfort is new and under construction, you gotta learn to be patient and understanding.
There are PLENTY of people using it and more coming!
I keep seeing people say “but its empty! no one is there!” like yeah Becky, its NEW. But there ARE a lot of people online using it, there are easy to find communities already up and running and with tumblr doing what its doing there are going to be WAY more people showing up. Joining any new social media is going to give you that awkward time where you have only 5 people you follow cause youre not sure how to use it yet, let yourself have those growing pains.
Its Not ‘Ugly’ or ‘Bad’ its UNDER CONSTRUCTION
Gods help me. They are still building the website and have a huge list of things they are looking to implement soon once the foundation is secured. There is transparent blogs from the developers where you can suggest what you would like to see if its not there already. Its NEW its UNDER CONSTRUCTION.
You “Don’t Trust” them? Okay have fun on twitter?
I dont even know what to say to people huffing and saying they dont trust any alternative. Like, do you trust tumblr? Do you? 
The fact is, if you PERSONALLY aren’t interested in another blogging platform that takes the good shit from tumblr and LJ and other sites and makes it new and their own then thats fine. But you dont need to spread misinformation to people to discourage them from trying it for themsleves. 
If you just dont want to use it until its ‘busy’ or whatever, then just shut up, take down everyone’s usernames, go to twitter or facebook or club penguin or whatever, and wait. But please stop spreading misinformation.
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Pillowfort has accounts on Tumblr and Twitter and have been VERY vocal. Go and read and look into things yourself.
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bokutospup · 3 years ago
Now or Never
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Summary: Reader is a communications expert and Poe Damerons girlfriend. She experiences the events of the last Jedi alongside the love of her life and what follows those events are some major revelations. Got all you need in a fic— fluff, angst, smut. All of it. also, reader has implied force-sensitivity.
disclaimer: nothing from the star wars universe, I own. be haters, you wont.
Warnings: ITS LONG AS FUCK, poe being a drama queen, your mom joke discourse, swearing, injury, smut (eventually guys I promise), angst, fluff all that good stuff, The Last Jedi spoilers, age gap, violence, near death experiences.
Words: 14,033 im sorry i dont know what happened. 
You had never been more anxious than in this very moment. Poe ‘Trigger-Happy-Fly-Boy-Love-Of-Your-Life’ Dameron had just made a joke about General Hux’s mother. You knew Poe was brash and he was impulsive, it was one of the reasons why you had fallen for him in the first place. Like everyone knew though, there was a time and place for jokes regarding ones mother and that time and place was not before a bombing mission against the Republic.
Your entire body shook with fear for your boyfriends life as you sent transmutations to the bombing squad— where and when to drop the bombs and how many to drop. It was an easy transmission, one you had done countless times before in practice, but the pressure of saving what was left of the Rebellion on top of the fact that your boyfriend was an absolute idiot was a lot to deal with.
The General seemed to sense your anxiety and a soft, wrinkled hand pressed against your shoulder in a comforting way. She had an effect on anyone who worked for her that changed the energy of a mission, and you had never had a Genera quite like her until you were transferred to D’Qar.
“BB-8, punch it!” You heard him say through your earpiece. There were times where you were grateful for his voice ringing through your headpiece, but this was not one of them.
“He will be fine, Y/N. He always is— no matter how abrasive he can be.” You snorted at the Generals reassurance and pressed the send button on the screen in front of you.
“Respectfully, Ma’am— abrasive isn’t the word I would use to describe him.” You replied, leaning back and watching the loading bar creep its way to one hundred percent. She patted your shoulder twice before letting out a long breath and beginning to walk away.
“It’s not the word I wanted to use, but this is a professional environment.” She said, turning her attention to the communications from the fighter squad. You watched Poe’s fighter speed up the nose of the dreadnought and fire at the first two cannons effortlessly while you gnawed at your dry bottom lip hard enough to draw blood.
Poe had been your first friend after you had transferred. You had first met him when you were assigned to be his guide on raid missions— he had been charming and funny and calm in times of turmoil, and since you were still nervous to ‘stick it to the man’ (his words, not yours) it eased your quick breaths into a more steady pace. He had run into you one day at the bar— he had tried to hit on you, and after ignoring him for a solid thirty seconds (he was annoying, it had been a bad day, and you weren’t at the bar for a good time) you had told him to fuck off. He blinked in surprise at your words, and a wide smile spread across his face.
“Hey, its you! Strategy Girl! The one who drinks too much coffee!” He crowed, hand coming down to slap against your back. You blinked once, finally turning to look at him and sucked in a breath— Poe Dameron was a smoke show in real life, the holograms didn’t even begin to do him justice.
“Trigger happy Fly Boy!” You shouted over the noise of the bar, spinning in your chair to fully face him. “You’re really good at recognizing voices. I wouldn’t have even notice yours because of all of the music and noise around!”
“Well, when you associate someone’s voice with survival it’s not one you’re likely to forget.” He winked.
That had been two years ago, and since that night the rest had been history. Leia had noticed how close you two were getting to each other and to keep a morally upright workplace, had assigned you to take care of tactical bombing missions rather than raid ones. She had no intention of breaking you two up (you were the smartest and quickest communications officer she had ever had and Poe was a miracle behind the wheel), so she had been over the moons when you two had become almost attached at the hip.
“Alright, taking the cannons out now. Tali, start your approach.” He ordered, noticing that the documents and coordinates had been uploaded to the system. You had noticed that he had taken out three more large cannons after that command and also the fact that there were bee-like ships spilling from the side of the dreadnought.
“TIE fighters being released.” You heard the Lord Commander say from beside Leia. He hadn’t been as accepting of your relationship with Poe in the beginning. He believed that your relationship was cause for disruption and devolution of professional environments… or something like that. He also had minimal patience for Poe’s commentary, as it often did drown out other communications because frankly, Poe Dameron talked a lot.
You were torn from your time of staring at your boss when your headpiece was filled with static. It was loud, and you pulled it away from your ears briefly until the noise passed. When you let them go back to your ears, your stomach dropped.
“—weapon systems are down and we gotta take down that last cannon or our bomb ships are toast!” Poe cried through the speakers to his drone. You began searching for your boyfriend's ship and wants to cry at the sight of his weapon transmission board. The entire thing had been fried, and all the sensors that could have given you the ability to help him fix it had been absolutely destroyed. You slammed your hands against your desk (too much of the displeasure of the person across from you), and let out a deep growl. You hated not being able to do anything, especially when you knew exactly how to fix the issue at hand.
Then the bright red light of the dreadnoughts guns filled the command room— they had finally opened fire on the base. There was a moment of silence, people praying quietly that the last evacuation ship had made it in time.
“We’re clear, General!” Eliza, one of your good friends said through the speakers. The smile in her voice was evident and you wanted to cry. She had been your roommate for nine months now, and you never thought you would have been so close to anyone in your life. Poe, Eliza and yourself had become a force to be reckoned with over the recent weeks, climbing social and work ladders until you were all taking the most risks and reaping the most rewards.
You cried out in joy and looked back at the General who had a small, but satisfied smile on her face. “Okay, Poe. You can come home now, let’s get out of this place.”
“No! General! We can do this!” He yelled, accelerating his ship waters towards the final cannon. You knew he wouldn’t settle for anything less than a full success war story, but you had hoped that for once he would think of someone other than himself for just one second. “We have the chance to take out a dreadnought! These things are free-killers, we can’t let them get away!”
“Dammit Poe!” You swore under your breath. You watched as the censors came and went on Poes weapon board, and you assumed BB-8 had taken to trying to fix the ship. You turned your comm on and channeled yourself to talk to the drone himself.
“Hey buddy, you’re going to need something bigger to hold the broken plugs in place so I can get Poe back online.” You were met with a steady string of beeps that roughly translated to ‘what do you think I’m trying to do, here?’ Give or take a few choice swear words. You knew, that despite the Generals demands, that Poe would persist— hence, your instruction to the droid.
When BB-8 had figured something out, you typed the codes into the system and gave the droid the go-ahead to fire when it and Poe deemed fit.
“Go, BB! Bring my boy home.” You said into your earpiece, turning your mic off and praying things went your way.
“Bring in the bombers!”
The mission had technically been a success. The team had managed to take out the mother ship, and your boyfriend and best friend had returned alive. The resistance had made some sort of history, and when you were little, you had wanted to be apart of history— just not at the expense of 100 lives your boyfriend was responsible for. You sat at your desk, watching the stars and the clusters of glowing gas pass by the front window through hyper speed. The celebration had been brief, and half-hearted because how the hell could someone be happy that the mission had cost so many their lives.
“Y/N!” You heard your name being called from the far side of the front deck, and you spun in your seat to see your best friends run through the door. You ran to Eliza first, as you had been more concerned for her, for a much larger span of time. She had been assigned to be the last evacuation ship to leave, and you knew the entire process would be cutting it close to the First Orders destruction of D’Qar.
“Eliza, thank the Force that you’re safe.” You whispered into the crook of her neck, clutching the back of her neck and holding her close to you. You pulled away and cradled her soft cheeks in your hands, kissing her head briefly before glancing at your boyfriend.
Poe looked like he had been dragged through fire, and he looked like he hadn’t seen a bed in years. The bags and soot on his face darkened his skin more than you had ever seen it, and your heart broke for him. He knew that many people had died as a result of his actions, and you also knew he wouldn’t admit that until the very day he died. You hugged Eliza once more and moved to Poe, who looked down at you with sad eyes.
“Hey, FlyBoy.” You murmured, brushing his cheek with the back of your hand. He leaned into your touch and his hands went to wrap themselves around your waist, pulling you tightly against him. Your arms wrapped around his neck, and you tilted your head to the side so he could hide his face in your neck. You felt him let out a shuddering breath, and he sniffed once before he let your down and smiled back at you.
“Hello, My Love.” He whispered. You knew he was afraid, and you saw the adrenaline fade from his system as his normally proud posture became one of exhaustion. The ship exited hyperspace, then— and his body lurched into your own. You caught him and pulled him to your desk to urge him to sit down for a while until the General arrived to debrief the crew. You leaned against your desk, looking at Poe and running your hands through his thick curls. He hummed in response, and rested his forehead on your upper stomach, taking thirty seconds to close his eyes and regain whatever energy he could summon. Your fingers tangled in his hair, and you simply held him to you, willing whatever energy you didn’t need into his body so he could continue to function.
“General on the bridge!” Someone shouted, and you and Poe both shot up to attention. When she had told the crew to ease off, she stormed across the bridge until her billowing cloak stopped in front of you and Poe. She seemed to barely acknowledge you existed, as her tiny frame came chest to chest with Poe’s much larger body.
Then, Leia raised her soft, wrinkled hand and slapped Poe hard across the face.
“You’re demoted.” She said curtly. She spun on her heel and stormed over to the main center, not waiting to see either of your reactions. If she had looked at Poe, she would have seen shock and offense, mostly— if she looked at you, however, she would have seen someone who was trying their hardest to not burst into inappropriate laughter. That was one slap that was well deserved.
“Wait! General, we took down a dreadnought.” He said, trying to not lose his mind and trying to defend his commander status.
“At what cost?” She bit back, turning around to face her favorite pilot. It was no secret that Leia had loved Poe like a son— but even mothers had to scold their children to the fullest extent.
“You start an attack, and you follow it through.”
“Poe, get your head out of your cockpit,” she growled. “There are somethings you cannot solve by jumping in an X-Wing and blowing something up!” She pressed a hand to her forehead, and let her fingers pinch the bridge of her nose as if she was trying to repress a migraine. “The sooner you learn that the sooner we can start actually saving lives.” She turned to walk away from you and Poe, but he lunged forward and grabbed her arm, spinning her to look back at him.
“There were heroes on that mission.”
“Dead heroes and no leaders.” She bit back, her voice saturated with disappointment. Poe stared at the place where the General had previously been for thirty seconds before his blinked. His heavy lids looked to you as if they had the weight of the world on them, and all you wanted to do was to hold him close to you and tell him everything was going to be okay (whether it actually was or was not going to be).
Despite your main desire to comfort Poe, you knew that Leia was right. It was a miracle that anyone at all had come home, and Pe had lacked the necessary leadership quality everyone had expected of him today.
“She’s being dramatic.” He grumbled, leaning against your descend toeing the ground with his steel-toed boot. You wrapped your arms around your own waist and pursed your lips together while staring at him with a raised brow. “What?” He asked once he looked at you. He had hoped to see some form of sympathy on your face, not one of contempt.
“She’s very much right, Poe.” You said, backing up in the direction Leia had gone. 
“What side are you even on, anymore?” He called after your retreating figure.
“Can we jump to light speed?” Poe cried, watching the hologram in front of him. Snoke and his First Order had appeared not ten minutes after you had, and you were aghast at how in the hell he had managed to find you. You ran to the center console and brought up the ship's resources— if you sent the command to the engine room, it would be the last command you would ever make for light speed.
“We have enough fuel resources for only one jump.” You replied, nervously looking towards Leia, Finn (who by some miracle had woken up and wandered the ship naked), and C-3PO.
“Do what you need to do,” Poe replied, not taking his eyes away from the monster of a ship that was looming over you like some sort of hanging sword.
Before you even had the change to type in your security code to send the command, Leia’s hand shot out and stopped you.
“Wait! They’ve tracked us through light speed.” She gasped, looking over at you and Poe. The silence that followed this statement made the entire commanding bridge go silent. The only sounds were the sirens and alarms indicating that they were under attack, the breathing of Poe beside you, and the hammering of your heart in your chest. This could not be happening right now.
“That’s impossible,” Finn said. He had joined Leia as soon as the sirens went off, and he had some sort of powerful energy surrounding him that mimicked that of Leia.
The General nodded in response, “it is. And they’ve done it”
“So if we jump to lightspeed, they’ll just track us and we’ll be out of fuel,” Finn replied, confirming everyone's worst fears. You took a moment to look up at your boyfriend who looked back at you. Your eyes began to well up with tears of fear, and he simply responded by holding your hand. He intertwined his fingers with yours and squeezed them, his reassuring smile tight and pinched. When the smallest tear leaked out of the corner of your eye, something lit a fire in Poe’s eyes and he let go of your hand to run up to Leia.
“Not yet they don’t.” He said, not even looking back at you. “Permission to jump on an X-Wing and blow something up?”
“Permission granted.” She said, looking worriedly at you when he sprinted out of the room. You knew that the resistance would come with sacrifices, and you knew that falling in love with someone in the resistance meant even more sacrifices— but you had been through a lot of stuff with Poe these past few years, and you felt you deserved at least a goodbye wave.
You chased Poe out of the room, breathing hard to try to keep up with him. You never knew how he could manage to suddenly have all of this energy— he had been borderline exhausted just five minutes ago.
“Poe!” You shouted, dodging soldiers and jumping over boxes that had been abandoned in the hallway. “Poe Dameron!”
If he had heard you, he didn’t give it any sense of recognition and only pushed himself to run faster. Once you had finally caught up to him, you continued running parallel to him— not knowing where he was going but knowing that you would follow him to the ends of the galaxy if it meant keeping him safe.
“Poe, what the fuck are you doing?” You yelled, matching his strides and tasting the familiar taste of copper on your tongue. You weren’t the athletic type by any means, but when you needed to, you knew your body could do what needed to be done.
“Don’t wait for me! Go ahead and get the ship started!” He screamed to BB.
“Poe Dameron, stop for one fucking second and tell me what the fuck is going on!” You shouted, grasping onto the sleeve of his suit and pulling hard. He looked at you, and a look of concern flooded his face as if he had only realized that you were there with him.
“What are you doing here, Baby Girl? You need to get somewhere safe now.” He said, slowing to a jog and grabbing your hand to run alongside him.
“I’m wondering what the hell you’re doing, Dameron? You can’t just run off on me without explaining or even looking back and waving!” You sneered at him.
He turned around and you ran into his hard chest. “Well, I’m sorry if we are in a timed situation and there was no time to elaborate. General Organa knows what’s going on—you could have asked her.”
“I shouldn’t have to go to the General of the Resistance to know what my boyfriend is thinking! I’m sure you could have explained what you were doing in three words, and I would have known what you were talking about!” You said, shoving his chest. He grabbed your wrists so you wouldn’t be able to hit him again, or even pull away if you wanted to.
“Well, I’m trying to save this entire ship from certain death, and I’m not going to wait around for the leaders to tell me what to do when I already know what and how to do it.”
“God, Dameron. Your ego is so fucking large you can’t even see how stupid you sound! You’re so abrasive and you rush into things, and you don’t think them through. You’re a trigger happy FlyBoy who doesn’t know when to think about someone besides himself!”
“Fucking excuse me? I’m doing this to save everyone on this ship!” He growled, pushing you back into the wall.
“No, Poe. You just want to die a hero so your name will never be forgotten. You are so determined to not be forgotten that you forget about everyone else!” You snarl, stepping toe-to-toe with the man you loved, no matter how stupid he could be sometimes.
“And what’s that supposed to mean?” He replied.
“It means that you don’t truly care about anyone else other than you and your name. You didn’t even have the ‘time’ to kiss me goodbye. Do you not realize we could die any second?” You cried. You knew you had stepped over the line, but there was no stopping either of you once you began running your mouths at each other.
“I have people to save.” He said, voice cold and making tears well in your eyes. With that, he turned and ran.
You followed him into the ship hangar, knowing he had no intention of stopping to explain anything more to you. You stopped at the entrance panel, and the tightness he left in your chest wouldn’t seem to just go away. You noticed some movement beyond the forcefield that separated space from the hangar and your heart dropped to your feet. Kylo was here, and he was here for destruction. His tell-tale ship sped towards you, and once he fired two glowing blue torpedoes, you let out a scream that resounded from somewhere deep within you.
“POE WATCH OUT!” You screamed and were immediately met with a flash of red and a huge wave of heat that made you soar through the air towards where you had come from. Your ears rang, and your vision was fuzzy and lacked any real color. There was someone calling your name from somewhere around you, and it took a few short seconds to understand what was going on. You blinked your eyes slowly, and while your vision was unfocused, you could see a dull orange of a pilot suit.
He was okay.
“Poe?” You mumbled, waiting for your vision to stop making you see fuzzy doubles of everything. You felt someone lift you into their lap, and the warmth of your boyfriend made your beating heart slow in peace. His familiar smell of gasoline and soap registered in your senses and you hummed pleasantly.
“Hey, Baby Girl. You hit your head pretty hard, but we gotta get on the move again, are you okay to get up again?” You tried to sit up, but the wave of nausea that flooded your system made you groan and lean back into his embrace. You settled for simply looking up at him. He had a deep gash on his face, and the blood was mingling with the sweat, tears (why was he crying?) and ash on his face. You reached a hand up and wiped his wet eyes.
“Why’re you cryin’?” You asked, voice wobbly and soft. He laughed and wiped his eyes again with the back of his knuckles.
“You’re hurt, and we were fighting and I am so sorry, Baby.” He whimpered, leaning into your hand that was resting on his jawline.
You hummed, and let a smile creep across your face. “Good. You were bein’ an idiot.” You laughed weakly.
“Yeah. Yeah, I was.”
Finn had found the both of you— Poe was leaning against the wall, and you in his lap, resting your head on his shoulder. BB-8 had long since disappeared to go find help. The droid had returned with Finn and a squad of medics in record time, and soon enough your were swept off in two separate directions. Poe had run off to be a hero (‘i won’t so anything too stupid’) and you had been gurnied off to the trauma bay. You had been diagnosed with a minor concussion and a few bruised ribs— a set of injuries you were grateful to have. At least you were still alive.
Apparently, in the time it had taken for the medics to give you a full work-up, it was time to retreat to the escape pods as the large vessel had depleted all of its resources and had no further means to support itself.
One of the medical interns was instructed to wheel you to the medical ship, as you were a new patient with a head trauma and the lead medic wasn’t too inclined on losing another resistance fighter today. However, when you turned the corner, you were run straight into General Organa— clad in white medical garb and looking like she had somewhere to be.
“Maam!” You shot up from your chair and swayed a bit. Organa held your forearms in support and as much as she ushered you to sit back down, you were not having it. “No, I don’t need to sit down, I’m fine. Minor injuries. Why are you dressed like this, did you get caught up in the hangar explosion too?”
“No, unfortunately. I was just sucked out into space because my asshole of a son decided it was my time.” She grumbled. You took her offered arm and looped yours through her own. She walked with a purpose, but at a speed which you were comfortable.
“My Stars! I’m so sorry, General.” You said. You noticed soon enough that Leia was not alone. Soldiers surrounded her, one with a metal cutter of some sort and another with an arsenal of shock guns. “What are you doing, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“You don’t have to be so formal with me, you know.” She smiled up at you. For such a tiny lady she had such a presence to her.
“Sorry, Ma’am.”
“Anyways, your boyfriend and Eliza have been nothing but trouble for this evacuation, and he needs to be take in.”
“Wait, what? Are you going o kill him?”
“Put him in prison?”
“No, Y/N. We’re going to stun him and take him on the main shuttle. He has it in his head that Haldo is the bad guy here.”
“Like, THE Haldo? Like, War Hero Haldo?” You gasped. You had met her on the odd occasion, and over time you had met her, she had blown you away with her kindness and intelligence and bravery. “Did he know who she was?”
Leia laughed and clutched your arm. “Yes, but when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object—“
“Nothing gets done.” You finished. You had noticed that the squadron of soldiers had begun working on the bridge door, and you swallowed around the nervous lump in your throat. Poe was not one to back down from something he believed in, and you were worried about how this was about to play out. You knew that Eliza would surrender once she saw you arm in arm with the General, but with Poe, you weren’t so sure. When he got in the certain mood, his vision would narrow so that he only saw the final objective rather than the consequences of his actions.
The door had fallen then in a heap of dust and ash, and it took a few long seconds for the dust to clear. When it did, however, you were met with C-3PO (who looked as if he was on his way out—running no doubt), Eliza holding a gun in shaking hands by one of the transmission docks (she had never been very good with a gun), and Poe, standing tall behind the Command Chair. He looked puzzled when he saw both of you on the other side.
“Leia. Y/N.” He cried in relief. That relief, however, was swiftly replaced by total confusion and betrayal. He had never thought that his two favorite ladies would be ready to take him down for fighting for something he believed in, and yet as soon as that thought went through his head, he was thrown back seven feet and stunned by the gun in Leia’s hand.
The med team that had followed you (including your intern) rushed up to you and some went further into the bridge to retrieve Poe’s body. You collapsed into your wheelchair (granted, it wasn’t much of a wheelchair— there were no wheels), and smiled weakly at Eliza who had since run up to you and embraced you to the best of both of your ability. She was the one who had pushed you back to the main docks, and she was also the one who had been chatting away and filling you in on what had happened in the past four hours. Poe had sent Finn and some engineer out to a gambling planet to find some codebreaker with a red flower brooch on his lapel (“wait, that's an important detail? Why couldn’t you have just found him based on what species he was?” “because we got that information from Maz. She was in some sort of union dispute.” “of course she was.”). Then, they had found him, escaped, and were later re-captured. In the time it had taken Finn and his pal to do so, Eliza and Poe had organized some sort of tragic mutiny against Haldo (“you know she’s a really cool person, right?” “yeah I figured. When someone has that colour of hair, you have to assume that they’re pretty cool.”) and that mutiny had ended them up right where they didn’t want to be— on the loading dock, waiting for the right time to deploy the escape pods.
You were pushed quickly onto the pod, and Eliza had managed to snag you a spot by the window with the view of Snoke's ship. Granted, it was a very large, and very neat looking ship. It seemed to hold this sense of darkness around it, and it played tricks on the eyes of those who watched it— the light would warp and disappear around it as if it was some sort of sentient black hole.
You were brought out of you hypnotized state when Leia joined you, a seat seemingly being conjured out of thin air (it was an over-eager intern rather than magic) and she made no move to make any form of communication. She simply held your hand in her own and pretended as if there weren’t tears streaming down her aged face.
Poe woke up about one hour into the journey towards the resistance base, and to say he was distraught would have been an understatement. He cried out when he woke up and sprinted over to the window facing the Hub.  His palm slammed hard against the glass and his shoulders seemed to shake with shame and anger. He had failed, and the rest of the resistance would die out here. Haldo had been a coward, and he was going to die. He was going to die. He was going to die.
And so were you.
Poe wasn’t even entirely sure you were on any of the ships. He wasn’t sure if you were in a coma, or walking, or talking. He had seen you take that fall, and he knew that the sound your head made against the wall wasn’t one that was good. You were going to die, and he was going to die and the universe had lost all light.
Until he heard his name being called from the other side of the ship.
When he turned around and saw you sitting hand-in-hand with the General, his heart rate slowed to a pace that wasn’t going to send him into cardiac arrest.
“Come over here.” The General ordered softly. He hesitated only briefly, taking a look at you and weighing all of his options. He could run and take over the ship. He could take a gun and shoot himself. He could find a different seat.
However, the look on your face made all of his options seem like ones a child had made up. The look on the face he had fallen in love with was one of sorrow. Pure, unadulterated sorrow. The resistance had lost a lot of good men today, and he could see the guilt that came with surviving an event many were killed in was setting into the muscles of your shoulders. His eyes traced your battered figure, and then he only saw that there weren’t any other injuries besides the new behind the gauze on your waist and head, he decided that he could join his two ladies.
He looked out of the window, and there was some sort of white planet they were headed to.
“What is that?” He gasped.
“The mineral planet, Crait.” You replied, reaching for his hand. He took your hand in his own and fell to his knees beside your wheelchair, kissing your knuckles and rubbing his rough thumbs over the back of your hand. He reached up and planted a hard kiss on your mouth— it was full of ‘im sorry’s’ and ‘i love you’s’ and ‘i will never leave you behind again’s’. You pulled away soon, blushing hard and avoiding the amused gaze of the General. Instead of meeting her gaze (poe had, and his olive skin was flooded with red), you continued to inform him about what the planet was.
“It’s an uncharted hideout from the days of the rebellion.” His gaze shifted from you to Leia slowly.
“That’s a rebel base?”
“It’s abandoned, but heavily armoured— with enough power to send a distress signal to our allies in the outer rim.” You replied, hand once again coming up to trace his face gently. You frowned when you thumb brushed against the collection of stitches on his cheek.
“Haldo knew the First Order was tracking our big ship. They’re not worried about the escape pods. To them, the Big Ship is what is left of the entire resistance.” Poe nodded in understanding and leaned into your legs.
“So we could slip past them unnoticed and hide until the First Order passes. Okay, yeah. That could work.” He looked up at the General who looked back at him with a perfectly arched brow. 
Leia nodded down at him. “She was more interested in protecting the light than she was seeming like a hero.” She scolded softly. She grabbed his wrist and slipped off the tracker he had taken from Finn that leads to Rey and tied it around her neck. You knee nudged his shoulder and he looked up at you to see you smirking back down at him.
“I told you so, Flyboy.”
He rolled his eyes and looked out of the window across from where they sat. The First Orders ships persisted their fire on the Big Ship, and he was suddenly filled with regret. He had called Haldo a coward. He had called her a traitor. He called her two of the worst names he could think of when she was neither. She had sacrificed herself to contribute to the bigger picture. She knew that she was a part of something much bigger than herself, and she knew that to finally finish the puzzle that was the war they were living in she would have to die.
When Poe was close to collapsing into your embrace, a flash of orange flooded the pod. The party of three turned to see another pod exploding into minuscule pieces, with another large laser on its way to destroy another.
“Oh, my Gods.” You cried, hands slapping across your mouth to stifle the sob that bubbled through your chest and up your throat. Leia shot up from her chair and began firing order of ‘full speed ahead’ and other short commands. You cried out when another pod was obliterated and Poe tuned your chair to face him fully. He pulled you close to him, and for once, you both cried into each other. Life was never easy for either of you, you knew that. You were both born into rebellion families, and you knew life wasn’t going to be a free ride, but even this was too much for either of you.
“This can’t be happening. How did this happen.” You clutched at Poe’s pilot jacket to pull him impossibly closer to you.
“I don’t know Baby Girl. I love you so much.” He sobbed, raising his head to kiss you hard on the mouth. You returned the kiss briefly before pulling away.
“Don’t you dare say that, Poe Dameron. Don’t you dare.”
“I love you, Y/N, and I’m so happy we got to spend the rest of our lives together.” He whispered into your mouth, kissing you hard once more before standing up fully, wiping his eyes and joining Leia in commands. You were left alone once more, the short reprieve from grief and fear now over.
It was now or never.
You rushed yourself to one of the communication systems. You shoved a private out of the way and pulled rank to be granted access to all comms. You opened all lines to all other ships so everyone could collaborate on an ideal plan— you had no intention of speaking to any of them. All of your family was on this ship currently, and as long as this ship stayed in the air, The Spark was alive.
No, you were sending out as many distress signals as you could. You sent them to any moving ship, radio, or government base in a 60 light year radius not caring that some of them had been sent to the First Order hunting you down— they knew where you were, there was no need to hide from them anymore.
While many transmissions failed, a handful was picked up by some bases in the furthest reaches of your communication radius. It wasn’t an ideal situation, but it was a situation regardless.
You did what you could do in the time you had, and you pushed yourself away from the comm system. You ran into the cockpit, and joined Eliza— there were control coordinates that needed to be inputted, and you knew Eliza wouldn’t be able to do them herself. However, the sight that greeted you was something you never expected to see The Big Ship was turning around— her hyperspace engines glowing a brighter and brighter blue with each second.
“She’s running away,” Eliza said, looking up at Poe who was watching Haldo maneuver the ship.
“No, she isn’t.” You said in unison with him. You knew what she was doing. This was it. Haldo was going to kill herself for the bigger picture.
She blasted the Big Ship into light speed, tearing Snoke's ship in half as if it were a hot knife cutting through butter. You had never seen anything like it— you never thought it was possible until now. As Haldo tore through the ship, the darkness that surrounded it let go. There was so much light around where the ship had been that it made your eyes water. The stars and nebulas that had been distorted and erased by the ship were suddenly in hyper-sharp detail were oversaturated almost immediately. The ship had been quite literally torn in half, and when all was said and done, you wished you had something to capture the picture in front of you with.
Haldo had made history. She had made light in the darkest of times, and she had also made herself a hero.
You had landed without much more issues— the main ship had been destroyed, along with their cannons and other means of offense. The next hour or so was simply you trying to teach the remaining 200 people how to reboot an entire system despite the fact you also, knew nothing. Poe, now more relaxed underneath the protection of an entire mountain was throwing smiles at anyone and everyone. He had even tapped you on the ass while you were bent over trying to figure out how to re-wire the huge communication antennae.
“Good God, Poe can you not do that here?” You laughed, spinning up to face him. He smiled down at you and placed his hands on your hips, his thumbs pressing hard onto your hip bones. You sighed happily and wrapped your arms around his neck, leaning up to kiss him lightly on the lips.
“But we may die any second. If we do kick the bucket, I want you to die knowing how much I love your butt, and I want to die knowing that I touched that butt I love so much less than an hour ago, you know?” He crooned, kissing your neck. You pressed the side of your cheek to your shoulder to deny him any access to the soft skin of your throat. He whined like a child, and you simply laughed in response, shoving him away and watching his hips sway on his way.
“Get to work, you Scoundrel!” You yelled at him. He simply turned around and saluted you in response.
All joy disappeared from your face, however, when you heard Leia yell out for the gates to be closed. You all burst into action, and soon the heavy metal doors were being lowered.
“We need that door down now, Y/N!” Poe yelled, throwing a gun in your direction. You caught it with ease and shot a quick glare in his direction.
“I’m working on it, Dameron!”
When the gate hadn’t been shut in time, a ship slid under the remaining space, and you took cover behind a large crate filled with who-knows-what. You peeked over the top of it, and at Poe’s command, the resistance open fired at the flyer. Sparks were flying everywhere, and when Poe had called for a cease-fire, two pairs of hands were held up in surrender. The engineer and Finn had returned in one piece— so much for a successful mission, you thought, lowering your weapon and turning back to the antennae that just refused to work.
“Rose! Finn! You’re not dead! Where’s my droid!” Poe crowed happily. There was a responding call of whirs and beeps and you turned just in time to see BB-8 roll happily to Poe’s feet. “Hey, Buddy! God, I’m so glad you’re safe. How are you? You good?Oh, I’m fine— Y/N’s fine too— Yeah absolutely. Come here buddy— Gods I was so worried.” He chattered with the droid happily. It was rare for Poe to drop his Flyboy exterior in front of such a large crowd and you couldn’t help the tiny laugh that bubbled from the center of your chest. When BB heard your laugh, he whirred excitedly, and you bent over to greet him.
“Hey, baby.” You said, giving him a once-over. You straightened his antennae (unlike the one that wouldn’t just cooperate behind you), and you listened to him beep and buzz like an excited child who just had ‘like, totally the best day ever’.
Once BB had rolled away to tell someone else about his day, you had finally figured out how to fix the communications antennae (thanks to the help of rose, who taught you how to Hotwire it in less than thirty seconds). The shield had been turned on, and there was no way that the First Order should have been able to break in. You had been granted permission to use the GEneral’s personal code to send out any more transmissions and you and your crew were delighted to find that much more had been notified, and there was help on the way.
You had begun to think life had it out for you when a huge boom echoed across the planted, and dirt and other rocks fell from above you.
“Let’s get eyes on what the hell is going on!” Poe yelled. Finn sprinted to the viewfinder, and the news he delivered was something nobody wanted to hear.
“A battering ram cannon.”
“A what now?” Poe replied, placing his hands on his hips. You stopped what you were currently doing when Finn (who you had come to quite like through the stories you heard about him) announced that the First Order had pulled out all of the stops.
“Once it’s fully charged, it’s going to crack that door open like an egg.” Finn gulped. You watched from across the room as the expressions of the remaining resistance fighters crumpled into those of despair.
“There has to be a back way out of here, right?” Rose whispered, her chin wobbling.
“BB-8 has analyzed the life schematics and this is the only way in or out,” C-3PO replied. “We’re doomed.” He continued.
“Thanks for that optimism, 3PO.” You heard another voice say. You would have laughed at the remark any other day, but when your eyes met Poe’s and all that you could see was hopelessness, you thought that there was no way you could ever laugh again. The silence that followed seemed louder than any noise you had heard, and you just wanted someone to scream or shout or make any noise to drown out the suffocating silence.
“Come on.” Finn piped up, minimal hope in his own voice. “We have allies. People believe in Leia. They’ll get our messages and they’ll come but we have to buy time. We gotta take out that cannon.”
And suddenly, The Spark was re-lit.
Soldiers found themselves in the trenches that had been discovered only as the plan was hatching. That’s where you found yourself— sure, you were a communications officer, but with only 200 people left of the entire resistance, any form of defense was needed. You had also done all you could have done by sending out over thirty successful SOS signals.
You had both elbows resting on the salty surface of Crait, a large automatic weapon in your hands and rebels pressed up against your shoulder to shoulder. An older man, around the age of sixty, climbed a ladder a little ways from you to see how close the ramming cannon was— you couldn’t see it with the naked eye as of yet but the rumbling of the First Order was shaking the very ground you hunched on.
The elder mans footsteps tracked a blood red, and the stark contrast of the red clay underneath the sand was one you would have probably appreciated more if the weight of your gun wasn’t such a pressing feeling on your shoulder and hands. The man lifted one of the old walkies to his lips and ordered for the ground forces to begin their attack. Just as the last words left the men cracked lips, the roaring of classic ground racers deafened you for a brief second. They had been old, but well preserved and with minimal instances of explosions or malfunction they had been running and armed. The machines in practice though, weren’t as graceful as you would have liked, as one of the pod racers seemed almost out of control.
“He needs to put down the assistant skate or else he’s gonna crash.” The blue-skinned man beside you grumbled, watching it through his scope. As if he was heard, the Skate lowered from the belly of the ship and tore through the ground, leaving beautiful plumes of red clay and dust into the air.
“Holy shit.” You whispered, adjusting yourself to get a clearer shot of the back of the pod racers. Over the red clouds the machines kicked up, you saw how extensive the First Order army was. A familiar feeling of ice slipping down the dip of your spine made you shiver, but you persisted nevertheless.
“We’re going to be waiting a while, I think.” The man next to you said. His yellow eyes seemed to glow even in the high noon and you smiled softly at him.
“Hopefully we won't even have to pull a trigger.” You replied. He scoffed and his lids fluttered in doubt.
“You’re an optimistic one, Kid. It’s good to know there's still some of you kicking around.”
“I was supposed to die today. Me and my boyfriend were fighting in the docking hangar when Ren blew it up. I technically should be in bed right now, but here I am— bruised ribs and all.” You smiled. He mimicked your facial expression to reveal teeth that were rounded at the ends.
“Is that who you’re fighting for, then?”
“Yeah. I guess so— I’d really like a future with him, so I guess I’m fighting for that. Do you have anyone?”
The man sucked in a sharp breath and held it in his lungs for a few seconds before blowing it out through the gills on his neck. “My planet was destroyed by the Star Destroyer when I was away for business. I had a wife, I had a daughter and another one on the way and I never got to say goodbye.” He whispered, breaking eye contact with you and peering through the scope on his rifle. “I’m fighting so people don’t have to feel the same way I do.”
“You’re a brave man.” You remarked, rubbing his shoulder softly. His body swayed with the pressure of your touch and he smiled.
“You’re a brave woman. May the force be with you.”
The familiar sound of TIE fighters made your eardrums quake and you grit your teeth. The fight had started, and oh god you did not want to die. You really didn’t want to die because when you closed your eyes you saw Poe with a child in his arms who had his hair. You saw him living as a civilian and playing with the girl back on his home moon, and you saw yourself watching them in the yard. You saw that the kitchen window you were looking through had soft white curtains, and the heat from the jungle filtered through the screens, making the curtains dance. You saw yourself letting a dog of some sort out into the yard through the large patio doors, and you saw yourself living with Poe without a threat of war. You saw yourself with a gold band on your finger, and you saw yourself under the sheets with the love of your life. And oh Gods, you really didn’t want to die.
“Aim!” One of the arms commanders screamed. The TIE fighters were close now, and so you did the one thing you could do at that moment.
You grit your teeth and fired.
The blast of your gun broke one of the windshields, and you wanted to jump up in joy at the thought of taking down something that may have taken your vision away from you. However, the damage hadn’t been enough, and the fighter opened fire on the trench you were in, shooting the blue man beside you and burning your right arm because of the proximity. You cried out in shock and ducked behind the trench wall to find some sort of way to just breathe.
When you opened your eyes, you were met with the picture of an incinerated body, jacket blown open from the hot air and head lulled to the side. You hadn’t even asked his name. You had no idea who he was and now he was dead and nobody was going to remember him.
You wiped your eyes from the tears that threatened to fall, and popped yourself on the edge of the trench, aiming to kill, aiming to protect.
Aiming to fight for family, and for those who would not be remembered.
“Scatter, we need to stay active long enough to take out that cannon!” Poe screamed into his comm. He took a sharp right and began advancing towards the freight in a curvy, zig-zagged pattern. “Rose! On your right!”
“I can’t lose them!” She sobbed. She pressed her foot harder on the gas pedal and the panel underneath dropped to the ground— thankfully not taking the pedal with it, but scaring her beyond belief. The shadows of three tie fighters lined up above her almost perfectly wasn’t going to be the last thing she saw if Poe had anything to do with it. He accelerated to drive beside her, and opened the window, inviting her to jump into his pod so he could take her to safety. Before she got the chance to even look at him, a precisely fired shot took out all the fighters at once, the debris falling to the ground with crashes.
The Millennium Falcon had arrived and began taking out fighter and machine and Poe wanted to scream with joy. He swore to The Force that if anything should accompany the Falcon, it should be a theme song of blaring trumpets and crowds cheering— because God dammit all, that's what he was hearing at that moment.
The Falcon took out another fighter behind Poe and Rose and they diverged violently to avoid the round body that slammed into the ground where they had just been. As the Falcon had been so successful in depleting what the First Order initially provided, an order had been given to release all fighters— and the black spots that had been hovering over the battle (poe stupidly assumed that for some reason they were birds) dropped to the ground level and it became clear to him that they were not the birds he had hoped they were. Thankfully when Poe looked up, he had noticed that the Falcon had taken all the priority and began leading them all away from the pods.
“She drew ‘em off! All of ‘em!” Poe cried happily.
“Oh, they hate that ship!” Finn laughed in response. “It’s actually kind of a joke in the First Order!” It was only a few seconds of peace that followed the Falcon, but peace nonetheless.
“There it is,” Rose’s voice sounded through the intercom. And oh, God. It was there.
The cannon was about half the size of the door that separated the Order from the Resistance, but even from one mile away, Poe could see the heat waves radiating from it. Flanking it, were about two dozen AT-ST and AT-AT’s walking beside it. They were firing at the squadron already, and for the first time in his life, Poe felt as if he was in over his head.
“That is a big gun,” Rose said, her voice saturated with fear.
“It’s okay,” Poe reassured himself and his crew.
“It’s heavily armored, so our only shot is right down the throat,” Finn informed. He flicked up his missile launcher and sped forward and center, racing to the belly of the beast. “The cannon is opening, this is our chance.”
When the ground pegs embedded themselves into the ground below them to keep the cannon in place, the fire from the Dog Walkers (poe liked to call them that— the thought AT-AT sounded dumb when he said it outloud) opened all of their fire on the speeders. Dodging the missiles was hard enough before, but with double the effort from the First Order, the speeders were being shot down like fish in a barrel.
Poe's stomach dropped to the ground when he saw his fellow pilots being blasted with atomic particles. “They’re picking us all off, we’re not going to make it.” And Gods did he ever want to make it because you were back somewhere in the base waiting for him to come home and hug him. You were waiting back at the base with thousands of kisses he wanted from you and you were waiting for him back at the base with your soft skin and your obnoxious laugh and your sparkling eyes.
Gods, he wanted to make it.
‘Alright,” Finn announced. “Making my final approach, guns are hot.”
Poe shook his head. “No. The cannon is charged, this is just a suicide run now!” He shouted. He couldn’t take another close loss today. “Finn pull away!”
“No, I’m almost there!”
“Don't make me use your full name, Finn!” Poe screamed at his friend. “Pull away, that’s an order!”
Poe and the rest of the squadron pulled up, carving loops in the air with the smoke of their engines. He knew Finn would be stubborn, but Poe knew now that it was better to know when to quit rather than die trying to win something you could never have in the first place.
A shot of white light hit the door, first. The heat from it immediately blew your hair back over your shoulders and your eyes squinted up at it. You had rooted through the Blue Mans jacket, and miraculously, an ID card had remained intact.
His name has been Irue Tineo. He had been a Gizka, an amphibian species from the inner-middle rim. You had recognized his last name— his father had been a communications commander under the rule of the Old Republic and had died soon after the Great War began. You had studied him and had actually written on his contribution to the war for your final thesis paper in school. You had gotten an 87%. You tucked the card into your jacket pocket and had zipped it shut— you would make sure that Irue would be remembered.
The metal of the door was beginning to turn red as a result of the heat. The metal that was not fast enough at heating up, flaked off and scraped down the front of the gate and crashed tot he ground, barricading any form of getting out if the door was blown open.
“Everyone, get into the tunnels!” You screamed, dashing back to the entry of the trenches and hoping beyond all hope that you were protected in the tunnels. You pressed yourself against the very back of the walls and forced your burning eyes closed.
“Y/N?” You heard someone call out your name. You opened your eyes, and through all of the crowd, you saw your man flying towards you. There was the usual soot on his face, and there was an almost panicked look.
“Poe! I’m right here!” You shouted, pushing towards him through the stampeding rebels. His eyes met yours through the darkened tunnels and soon you had gotten close enough to him to throw yourself into his arms. Your own arms wrapped themselves tightly around his neck, and you buried your face into his shoulder the familiar smell comforting you just a little bit. He hid his own face in your hair, and he recognized the smell of burning hair and flesh. He pulled away and guided you to the side of the tunnel so you wouldn’t both die being trampled.
“What the fuck happened, Y/N.” He cried, hand raising to almost touch your shoulder but deciding against it in the long run.
“TIE Fighter took out the guy next to me, and the heat from the blast did some damage. I’m fine though.” You cried, pulling him to you. “I was just so scared I’d lose you today. We both should have died and we didn’t.”
In response to this, he just lowered his head and kissed you hard. His lips were burnt and chapped and rough, and his aggression made the cut on your lip open up, but you couldn’t have cared less at that moment. You held his face in your hands, and the cold of your rings was welcomed against the flush of his own hot cheeks. He bent over and held your waist tightly in his arms. His tongue ghosted over your bottom lip, but before you could deepen your kiss, a large crash resounded somewhere within the base. He pulled away from you, and while the brown of his eyes was nearly blown black with lust and adrenaline, he knew that there were more things to be done.
“Gods, I hate not being able to touch you.” He whined quietly, making sure no-one rushing around you heard. You let out a laugh through your nose, and you wiped some of your blood from his lip.
“I know, Baby. We’ll get there one day.” You smiled up at him. Silently, you thanked whatever higher powers where out there at this moment— they had protected your Flyboy, and they had protected you just long enough to give you both this moment.
He took your hand, and took off at a run— a pace you could keep up with considering all of your injuries— and once you had finally made it to the entry hangar, the wind had been knocked out of your lungs.
The door had a molten hole in it— magma type liquid was dripping from the places that weren’t on fire, and while you knew it wouldn’t catch any more of the base on fire, the sight of something that was supposed to protect you burning sent a chill down your spine.
“Babe, look,” Poe whispered. You followed in the direction of his gaze and your brows almost immediately furrowed in confusion. There, walking towards the gaping hole that exposed you to the First Order, was a man. His page black cloak billowed in the wind that had been created by the fire, and his long grey hair mimicked the cloaks movements. The wrinkles on his skin looked as if they had been carved by the wind and sea, and you could even see the very pale grey colors of his eyes. The man's gaze was focused on the canon in front of the base, and it didn’t waver from it for the duration of his stroll. And yeah, the old man was strolling— literally, his pace was so slow you thought it would take him a millennia to even reach the door for God's sake. You were surprised, however, when his speed picked up, almost as if he wasn’t even touching the ground; he couldn’t have been because the pace his legs were moving and the length of his stride shouldn’t have been able to make him move at the speed of a slow jog.
When he came to a stop just after the trenches, there was a short pause. The ice dogs the had joined you all in watching made small, crystalline noises of intrigue and you wish you could have joined them. Then, every head of every machine out there turned to face the man, their guns blazed a hot-red and they opened fire on him.
In the time it had taken for you to get from the ground up to the control room and to the front of the crowd, they were still firing on him. Your hand came to rest on the small of Eliza’s back (she had given you the most relieved look that you were alive) and Poe had come up behind Leia to watch the onslaught over the shorter lady’s head.
There was no way that a man would have survived that. They had opened fire from every gun in their arsenal on this one man and shot him down for what seemed like hours. In actuality, when the few seconds of onslaught had passed, what remained was a huge cloud of black smoke. You clutched at Poe’s sleeve in fear of what you were about to see and what was soon revealed to you was nothing like you had expected.
The man had survived. The man was standing there, without a speck of dirt on him and he had survived. You watched in utter amazement at the man as he took a few steps forward and raised a hand to brush the invisible dust off his shoulder.
“Who is that?” You whispered in amazement.
“Luke Skywalker.” Leia smiled. Your knees wobbled a fraction of an amount at the news and suddenly, you weren’t so surprised he had survived.
I mean, come on. The man is a trademark legend.
“Medpack!” Finn screamed, tears evident on his face. He was dragging rose on his coat behind him, and when the medics relieved him of her body his hands came up to hold his head in anxiety. “She’s pretty badly hurt, I don’t know what happened I mean she saved me but—“ Poe’s hand came up to comfort his friend, and once Finn had calmed down enough to the point where he wasn’t screaming, Poe passed him.
He raised the high-tech binoculars to his eyes and gasped. “It’s Kylo Ren.” He announced. Sure enough, from your place behind Eliza, you could see the dark figure storming out towards Luke so fast you would have thought the very ground underneath him was burning.
“He’s facing him alone.”
“We need to help him.” You said, marching forward. Poe caught you by the waist and glared you down.
“No, wait Y/N.” With one arm wrapped around your torso, he raised the binoculars to his eyes once more and continued watching the scene in front of him. “Oh my Gods, Kylo just took off his cloak— who does he think he is a Sith Lord?” He mumbled to himself. Suddenly, Poe dropped the binoculars to the ground.
“He’s doing this for a reason. He’s stalling so we can escape.”
“But it’s one man against an army.” Finn piped up. “We have to fight.”
Poe turned around a fire in his eyes and walked up to Finn, forcing the younger man to back down.
“No. We are the spark that will light the fire that will burn the First Order to the ground. Skywalker is doing this so we can survive.” Poe turned t the rest of the crowd and began looking at all of the walls with his eyes squinted.
“There’s gotta be another way out of this place. How did he get in here?” Poe asked, projecting his voice so the entire mountain could listen.
“Sir,” C-3PO began. “It’s entirely possible an unmapped opening exists. But this vicinity is such a maze of endless tunnels that the odds of finding it are—“
“Shhh.” “400,100,98—“
“Shut up!” Poe shouted at the droid.
“To one…” He finished.
“Listen,” Poe whispered, pointing in the air. The silence was all but encompassing and the only other sounds that could be heard was the whirring of 3PO and each others breathing.
“My audio detection is picking up nothing—“
“Exactly.” Poe cut off. He walked deeper into the cavern and listened hard once more. “Where did the crystal critters go?”
Almost immediately, one of them appeared near the very back of the cavern. It barked twice before shaking its sharp tail and hopping back and out of sight. At both Leia and Poe’s command, the rest of the Resistance sprinted to where the creature had disappeared. If you could help it, you would surely never run a day in your life. The thing led you through many twists and turns, and after running for what felt like 100 miles, you were faced with one huge wall of boulders.
You then watched as the creature changed shape, and slipped through the smaller crack in the very center.
Poe felt as if he wanted to cry. “NO!” He sobbed. He sprinted up the boulders and pulled and hit them with the meat of his palms and once he knew they wouldn’t budge he rested his forehead against them and let out one long, shuddering breath. You didn’t bother to wipe the tear from your chin as you walked up to your boyfriend and placed a hand on his back. He sniffed and wiped his nose of the snot and dripping tears and he let out a tiny whimper.
“I was going to propose to you today.” He whispered almost so quietly you almost couldn’t hear him. “Everything was going our way lately, and I had finally felt it was a good time to ask. I went back to my dad's house and got my mothers ring from him and everything.” He turned and pressed his back to the wall. His eyes hopelessly scanned the people that had followed him and when they finally met your eyes, his chin wobbled.
“I was going to ask you to marry me today, and now we’re not gonna live.”
The hopelessness in Poe’s voice made your throat clench and you reached forward to hold his much larger hand in your own. You smiled sadly up at him and leaned into his touch that was meant for wiping away your tears.
“I had a vision today, actually. I saw you playing in our backyard on Yavin-4 with a little girl who had your hair. We also had a dog.” Poe let a watery laugh tear from his throat at your words.
“What kind of dog was it?”
“I can’t remember. It was a big one.”
“Big dogs are the best.”
“Yeah,” you smiled. “They are.”
His eyes turned sad again. “I love you, so much Baby Girl. I wanted so much more for us.”
You let out a wet sob. “I know. I love you.”
The kiss you shared then was sad, and it was one that just meant ‘Goodbye’.
When the rocks shifted and rolled Poe and you had fallen flat on the ground. The Resistance was a mass of yelling and gasps and praying, and when you finally managed to stand up, the rocks that had previously barricaded you in the Base had been moved and were now floating in the air away from the entrance. There was a new girl in the picture now, and you assumed she must have been frozen in the familiar Jakuu garb and short hair pushed behind her ears. She didn’t look a day over nineteen, and you felt an almost immediate bond with her— sure, she appeared to be about the same age as you, and she had just saved your life and the lives of everyone you held dear, but there was something much greater than that.
When Finn pushed past you and into her arms, the big question was answered about who she was.
It was Rey.
You and Poe watched hand-in-hand at the two reuniting and there was something deep within you that made you want to hug her as well. She seemed to notice the feeling as well, and when she looked at you, it felt as if a part of your life that had previously been missing was filled.
Amidst the chaos that ensued, you continued to keep an eye on four people. Eliza— who was always right behind you, making sure the brain injury and other war wounds you had would not hurt you. Leia— who had immediately glided over to Rey, and while not talking, spoke about everything that had happened. And finally Poe— who, once on the ship hugged everyone he saw, thanking each and every one of them not only for their service today but also for surviving.
Two large, raggy arms wrapped around your waist, then and you laughed loud when you realized that Chewbacca had found you alive. He let out some pleased grumbled and roars and mews and you commented back to him about how he hadn’t been looking too good. He simply shoved your shoulder and growled something that roughly translated to; “I’ve been on an island for three days, not eating anything but these little birds and sitting in the rain. Give me a break.”
When Leia had spotted Chewbacca, you stepped away from the huge animal and looked around the ship with a smile. You had only heard stories about the Falcon from Leia, so to be finally on the ship itself felt like a teenage dream come true.
When your eyes had drifted over to Rey and BB-8, you wiped your sweaty palms on her pants and walked slowly over to them— willing yourself to not turn and high-tail it out of there.
“His antennae never stays straight, hey? He’s too much of a little ball of energy.” You laughed, watching as the other girl patted his dome-like head. Rey looked up at you and a smile brighter than any star lit up her face when she realized it was you.
“Yeah, the first time I met him, he was lost in the Northern desserts of Jakuu.” She said, standing up and pointing vaguely in the direction the drone rolled to.
“Gosh, well Poe and I are very happy he’s still around. He’s like the Resistance child if I’m going to be quite honest. I’m Y/N.” You stuttered, holding out your hand for her to shake. She looked at it oddly like she wasn’t too sure about what to do with your hand. She reached her own forward and instead of shaking your hand, she held it in her own.
“I feel like I knew that for some reason. I feel as if we’ve met before.” She said, looking at you with an astonished gaze.
“We feel the same way, then. When you lifted those rocks and when I saw you, I felt as if Had known you my entire life.”
“Yeah.” She agreed, still holding your hand. You felt Poe wrap his arm around your shoulders and you and Rey broke apart, still looking at each other, but not as intently as you were only seconds before.
“Hi.” He smiled. “I’m Poe.”
“Rey,” She replied with a shy smile, she shook his hand and looked up at him through her lashes like a puppy who hadn’t yet had experience with larger dogs.
“I know.” He smiled.
It was a few days of traveling the Galaxy to find somewhere that would house a handful of rebel scum until they found a planet that would take them in. Naboo was a planet that had successfully resisted the plight of the First Order, and the lush climate had been such a better situation than the cold, and dry air of Crait. You and Poe walked off of the Falcon, and it was so much nicer to breathe in air that didn’t smell like feet and recycled oxygen— so when you took a deep breath and smiled, Poe felt as if he had never loved someone more at this moment.
You felt a soft tug on your hand, and you opened your eyes to look up at the love of your life. The sun made his skin almost glow, and the brown of his eyes was saturated with warm flecks of gold.
“I love you, Y/N.”
“Then show me, Commander.” You smirked. His warms eyes became steely at your sentence and his strong jaw clenched. He opened the door to the room you had been given and you moved in from the balcony to the huge room you had been given— you weren’t sure if the room had been granted to Poe because of his rank within the resistance, or it was the overabundance of empty rooms as a result of less than expected people.
You didn’t want to give it a second thought, and you were immediately pushed against the closed door by Poe. His touch against your skin was feverish, and his rough hands traced their way up your body, slipping past your open jacket and under your tank top you wore underneath. You had changed clothes since the battle, and the wounds on your body had been properly dressed— the burn on your entire arm and shoulder was properly wrapped and you had survived the day relatively unscathed besides that.
Your hands grabbed Poe by his shirt which you made quick work of and leaving it on the floor somewhere between the door and the king-sized bed. You pushed your own jacket off of your shoulders and when Poe’s knees had hit the edge of the bed, you climbed into his lap and shucked your loose tank top to reveal your bare chest. Poe looked up at you once and his attention eventually drifted to your tits. His mouth latched onto one while his forefinger and his thumb tweaked the other nipple, both of them rolling between his fingers. He hummed in response to your throaty moan and the vibrations sent a jolt of fire through your core. You threw your head back in pleasure, and you felt the pressure of the open-mouthed kisses he left on your neck, sucking deep bruises onto the sensitive skin there. You shifted your hips against him, and already the friction being created was something that you wanted to have for the rest of your life.
Poe moaned against your neck, and when you rolled your body into his he flipped you over and slammed you hard into the mattress below you. You laughed at your idiot boyfriend as he started swaying his hips and crossing his arms to take off the plain white shirt he had been given, and he swung it around his head before launching it away from him. He planted one of his knees between your legs and kissed up your body tenderly, making sure to plant one on every scar, blemish and freckle your body had to offer, no matter how many you had.
Your hand carded through his thick hair, and while it was full of dirt and oil, and sweat the curls that slipped through your fingers were one of the softest things you had ever touched— you didn’t know how soft hair could be until you met Poe.
When you tugged lightly in response to a tiny nip at a bullet wound on your ribs, he growled into your stomach and drove his thigh into your core, making you buck into it in pleasure. You pulled him closer to you, and thrust your hips against his thigh and occasionally feeling the bump of his knee on your clit.
“I’m gonna need you to take off your pants.” You murmured against his lips. He smiled into the kiss and pulled away quickly to undo his belt and unzip the khaki material, pushing it down to his ankles and kicking them off. His hard member was unrestricted by underwear— Poe never liked to wear underwear in the first place— and it slapped against his stomach, stringing a drop of pre-cum from his navel to the head of his swollen cock. You reached forward and wrapped one hand around it, pulling him closer to you. He stepped between your clothed legs and his hands found something to hold onto in your hair. You licked the tip of his dick with your rough tongue and he let out a short shout of pleasure.
You wrapped your mouth around the tip of his dick and slowly made your way down his length. Your tongue poked out a little against the underside of his shaft to make room for more of him. Once your nose brushed the pubic hair on the space of skin above his dick, you pulled your head back and hollowed out your cheeks, letting your fingers come up to lightly massage his hanging balls.
“Oh, fuck Baby Girl.” He whispered, pulling your hair into a ponytail at the base your neck and continuing to guide you up and down his member slowly, meeting the thrusts his hips made. When his balls twitched in your hands, you pulled yourself off of him and gasped for air you had been lacking.
His mouth met yours in a heated but slow dance, and the taste of his cum on your breath made his movements of undoing your pants that much quicker. Once he got your pants lose enough, he ripped them off your legs, throwing them behind him and climbing up your body so you were laying down. You hitched a leg around his hip and he grabbed one of the fluffy pillows from the head of the bed to place underneath your butt so you would both be comfortable and your pleasure would be maximized.
“You good?” He panted overtop of you, guiding his cock you tease you by rubbing the tip up and downtime length of your lips.
“Of course, baby.” You whispered. You dug your heel into one of the dimples on his back, and he thrust into you swiftly bottoming out in one thrust. The heat from his member warmed you from your very core, and the pleasure made you rake your nails across his waist.
“Fuck, Princess. You’re always so fucking tight for me.” He whimpered into the crook of your neck. You purposely clenched yourself around him and he almost sobbed in pleasure. “Fuck. You’re gonna make me cum like a teenager.”
“Oh, because you’re so much older than me.” You laughed, wiggling your hips and urging him to move. He pulled out slowly so that you felt every curve of his cock in your body and slammed back into you. He continued doing this until you let out a guttural moan after you had thrown your head against the blanket underneath you.
“Ten years is a lot for some people.” He mumbled, sweat budding on his brow at the effort it took for him to hold himself back from literally tearing you in half.
“We all know time isn’t real. One year on Yavin could be 1000 years somewhere else.” You replied, clutching at the muscles on his back as he thrust into you again.
“So, you’re saying we’re two old people just fucking?” He laughed, kissing you softly.
“I mean, I’m not going anywhere, so we might as well be.” You replied, rolling him over and sitting on him quickly. He moaned loudly and grabbed your hips so he could help you grind down on him. He made you feel so full at this moment that you wanted to cry. You rolled your hips into his in a way that brushed your clit against his pubic bone and within seconds, the coil in your belly was the tightest it had been in days.
He knew where you were in your pleasure, as he felt you fluttering aggressively around him and he bounced you harder on him, making your thighs slap against him in the most delicious way.
“Fuck, Poe. I’m gonna cum.” You gasped, placing your hands on his pecs and digging your nails into the muscle there.
“Hold on, I’m almost there Baby.” He grunted, thrusting harder into you. You had no idea how you were supposed to last because the speed and the hard thrusts he was doing was surely going to make you lose your mind.
“Okay, baby.” He gasped. You watched as the veins in his neck protruded and you leaned down to trace them with your tongue. “Cum for me.”
White-hot pleasure shattered you, and you collapsed onto him, shaking and sweating. He rutted a few more times into your core before cumming with a yell. You felt the cum in your stomach, and you stayed there— cock still inside you— for three minutes, just trying to catch your breath. Eventually, your hips began to cramp and you slid off of him with a ‘pop’ and rolled onto your back. He propped himself on his elbow and hovered over you, kissing your softly a few times before brushing the hair from your face and kissing you again.
“I’m happy you’re alive.” He mumbled.
“The feeling is mutual, Commander.” You panted and kissed his arm. “I love you, so much.”
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hvnlydmn · 2 months ago
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characters — timeskip!miya atsumu, suna rintarō, kuroo tetsurō, iwaizumi hajime, oikawa tōru
a/n — OKAY LOOK I KNOW YOU WANTED LIKE ROLES SWITCHED BUT IM GONNA DO THAT ONE TOO I SWEAR, i just got rly inspired by this but ill do the reader not reacting version too i swear <3
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☾ ATSUMU had been showering as he approached you in the living room ready to cuddle up with you finally. “angel? god av missed ya so much.” his arms outstretching before he leans down onto the couch, the cushion dipping under his weight “sorry ‘tsumu, i can’t cuddle for long i’m going out with my guy friend.” he literally freezes before his arms slap at his sides, a whiney huff coming from him as he remains in front of you “but baby! that ain’t fair, ya know the nights ‘re ma time with ya!” he’s such a whiney baby, with his lips all jutted out and still wet, messy hair “tsumu i can’t.” “who’s yer guy friend anyway, hmph he better not be tryin’ ta steal ma kisses, a aint sharin’ they’re mine!” he’s all grumpy, groaning and flopping onto the couch beside you. he basically squishes you when you said you were joking.
☾ SUNA was vibing in the kitchen as he grabbed some snacks, ready to watch the new episode of a tv show you both started together, a weekly tradition. “rin, i’m going out with one of my guy friends.” he spins so quick to frown at you, oversized hoodie and a chuupet hanging from his mouth “it’s tv night.” “i know but i said i’d go.” “then tell him you’ll go another night.” he’s all huffy and shoves his hands in his pockets, frowning a little at the floor “fine, but i’m not waiting for you. i’m texting you spoilers.” “omg rin, dont!” “too bad, pretty baby. we could be watching it together but..” just shrugs his shoulders before brushing past you gently, even makes the couch look extra comfy with loads of blankets, teases you for being clingy when you join him tho.
☾ KUROO had just came home from work when you approached him at the door, a sly grin on your face “coming to greet me at the door kitten? you must’ve missed me.” “actually i’m going out with one of my guy friends tetsu.” he literally just blinks at you like “sorry i couldn’t hear you, my heart shattered.” grabbing his chest and hunching over, trying to lean on you even though he’s about to knock you over “no, no it’s fine kitten. you enjoy your night with your guy friend, i’ll b-be fine.” he’s literally such a drama queen you end up telling him it was a prank early because he’s that annoying. “i knew you’d rather hang out with me.” literally just wraps an arm around you and guides you into the house like it never happened he’s a menace.
☾ IWAIZUMI was really looking forward to watching a movie with you after work, but his little smile immediately became a frown when you told him you couldn’t. “sorry haji, i’m going out with a guy friend.” “huh? w-what guy friend? who is he?” he’s crossing his arms over his chest and frowning down at you pls hes so grumpy but cute. “you don’t know him, hajime.” “that’s the problem, i don’t know who this guy is. how do i know i can trust him with you, doll.” literally immediately softens because he just wants to know people are taking care of you “it’ll be fine.” “well i’m dropping you off and i can pick you up, i need a good look at this guy.” he gets a little blushy when you say it was a prank but he still lets you sit on his lap for movies, glad you’re in his arms.
☾ OIKAWA was waiting for you to cuddle when you walked right past him instead “excuse me y/n-chan! you can’t ignore your boyfriend that’s rude!” “sorry, tooru i’m going out with my guy friend!” literally gasps before running over and wrapping his arms around your waist “mi amor, leaving me for some brute? what’s his name?” you just giggle and tell him it doesn’t matter only for him to basically push his phone into your face a few seconds later “omg it’s him isn’t it? ew he’s ugly y/n-chan, i’m so much prettier you should cancel!” he’s literally roasting random men on your instagram trying to convince you that he’s truly the best company, not that you needed convincing but he’s still a loser.
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dumbassdolan · 2 years ago
Thanks for the Ride [G.D.]
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A.N.: Um, Hi? I’m kinda rly new to this fandom and being in a fandom so this is my first smut and fan fiction in general. Im rly kinda just coming out of nowhere and dropping this fic that no one asked me to write lfmao it be like that🤪i dont even know why i did this im in ethan’s lane but grays rly been tempting me lately idk😩 I’m sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, I kinda got too antsy to post it and didn’t want someone to write it first lol so I didn’t rly edit it too well. Also I did not come up with this idea I saw an anon give this idea to @rockstardolan and she said someone should write it and i rly wanted it to exist so all credit to them both and sorry if i didnt do it justice? I hope y’all enjoy anyways!!
Warnings: (some pretty explicit) Smut, Colorful Language (sorry idk why i have such a potty mouth but i also felt like it worked w the prompt?)
“E, no. I know Ubers aren’t running in this weather, but I would rather walk in this fucking blizzard than have Grayson pick me up right now. Are you serious? For fucks sake, fine. But when we get to your house, be ready because I’m gonna beat the shit out of you.”
You hang up the phone and huff out some air, being the drama queen you are. Sure it’s extra but if there’s one thing you are: it’s definitely extra. In your defense, today just is not your day. It’s the first day of your winter break and you were planning on spending it with your best friend, Ethan. What you didn’t plan on was the from train you were supposed to be taking, from Hoboken to Gladstone, to be conveniently out of service due to the sudden cold front sweeping New Jersey. Another thing you didn’t plan on was having to now sit in an hour car ride with Grayson fucking Dolan because Ethan was stuck in traffic after picking up his sister from the airport.
In simple terms, Grayson and you never got along. You tried to be civil with him, but something about that glint in his eyes and that cocky smirk and even that way he carries himself with such pride, just makes you fume. Not only does his mere presence personally offend you, but he is scarily good at pushing your buttons. Grayson just knows how to make you tick. It’s so easy for him. He can just smirk his stupid smirk, his dimple on display, and drip pure suave; but if anyone were to ask you, you’d say it’s more egoism than suave. Grayson is just a grade-A douche in your opinion, that’s all there is to it. A muscly, sexy, tall hunk of pure douche.
Being Ethan’s best friend was especially hard, them being twins and everything, so you tried to just coexist with him but seldom did it ever work. Usually, you’re a very patient person but with him, you just couldn’t do it. You’re very headstrong: once you have your mind made up, not much can change it. Nothing could make you change your mind about this: you could not stand Grayson Dolan.
When Grayson shows up to get you, you nearly didn’t recognize him in a normal car. Obviously he’s driving his parents’ car since his douche-y Porsche is back in Los Angeles. If anyone else was driving a baby blue Porsche you might’ve said it was hot. But when it’s Grayson’s, it’s a douche car.
He pulls up to the train station where you’re sitting on the bench, clinging to yourself for warmth, and rolls down the car window.
“Hey princess, you want a ride?”
“You know I would really rather just fucking freeze to death out here but Ethan would get mad so yeah, unlock the damn door,” you snap back. You watch the trunk open automatically, secretly thanking Grayson for hitting the button so you didn’t have to ask him, and quickly rushing to throw your suitcase in it. The quicker you get in the car, the quicker you can get out and away from Grayson.
“Ah there’s the fire I’ve missed. Still got that dirty little mouth, huh, cupcake?” He smirks that fucking smirk as he watches you get into passenger seat. Already pissed, you glare at him like you’ve never glared before.
“Can you just drive? And don’t call me that.”
He’s got one hand on the steering wheel, the other resting on his lap, and he adjusts his body to be slightly angled towards you. As you continue glaring, he just stares right back at you with that same fucking smirk. A roll of your eyes and then you’re looking him up and down, drinking in his appearance as subtly as possible, before continuing to glare at him with challenge in your eyes. Despite your aversion to him, you can’t deny that Grayson is an attractive guy. A white long sleeve shirt clings beautifully to his arms, biceps chiseled from stone. Simple black sweatpants on his legs, almost on the verge of being too small because with his recent workout regiment he only seems to get bulkier, his thighs being thick, muscled proof. Maybe it would be different between you two if he wasn’t the way he was. As attractive as he was, he still pisses you off. Such a waste of sex-on-legs, you think to yourself.
“Are you ever gonna, hmm, I don’t know, fucking drive?” Two minutes into your interaction and you already wanna punch him in his pretty-boy mouth.
He looks at you expectantly, as if he was waiting for something from you. “Safety first, babygirl, it’s rough out there and I gotta get you home in one piece.” You decide not to retaliate on his yet another pet name for you because your reactions would simply egg him on more. You didn’t want to get yourself all worked up right now because, if by the time you guys got to the house you were in a full-fledged fight, Ethan would be mad at the both of you and no one likes Ethan when he’s angry. Wordlessly, you click your seatbelt into place, cross your arms over your chest, and stare right back at him. It’s only a quick moment before he lets out a chuckle, sucks his teeth and shakes his head at you, finally starting to drive. “You’re kinda sexy when you get angry.”
“Oh fuck off.” He straight up laughs at that one, shaking his head as if he predicted he would elicit that response out of you and you just proved him right. To be honest, he probably did. Grayson always knows how to drive you literally insane.
“God, you’re no fun. I don’t know how Ethan puts up with your ass.” He peers over at you through his peripheral vision, waiting for the angry comeback from you.
“At least he chooses to hang out with me, you he got stuck with.” He scoffs and stays silent, the drive finding a quiet equilibrium after that. Grayson knows not to push you past a certain point, especially when you two are alone. When you two are alone, there is always that imaginary line that neither of you seem to dare to cross. Enforcing that unspoken rule, you make sure to stay staring out the window, ignoring his existence and preventing him from looking at you and making any sort of comment that could make your blood boil.
Time passes until Grayson gets bored with the quiet and turns up the radio. You don’t outwardly react, so he turns it up. You still keep your composure, so he cranks up the volume and starts singing along with the music, glancing over at you to see if he’s gotten your attention. The music you were fine with, but the obnoxious singing is a whole other level of annoying. You slowly turn your head to look at him, whilst attempting to remain calm and collected. “Grayson, can you please at least turn it down or shut the hell up?”
“Y/N, can you please get the stick out of your ass and stop being such a buzzkill all the time?” You audibly scoff at that one. God, he’s such a dick. Everything was fine for nearly half the car ride but he couldn’t just leave it be. He never can.
“Oh my god, I was literally being nice, why are you an asshole now for no type of reason?”
“You call that nice? I get out of my comfy, warm house and into a fucking blizzard to drive an hour to pick you up out of the kindness of my heart, and within the first few minutes all I got was a “Fuck off,”, not even a thank you. Y/N, you literally don’t know how to be nice.”
“Oh I don’t know how to be nice?” The absolute nerve this kid has is ridiculous. He’s always the one who starts it but you’re the one who doesn’t know how to be nice.
“Yeah that’s what I said.”
“You’re insane. You’re always the one who starts shit. I try to put up with you for Ethan. I try to tolerate you but you’re just the worst fucking person ever!” You’re almost at a volume of screaming, he’s really got you going now.
“Oh my god you’re such a fuckin-“ Grayson cuts himself off when the engine sputters, catching him off guard. “No, no, no, no fucking way. You’ve got to be kidding me. Fuck!” Grayson veers the car just in time to get it safely off the road as it shuts down. He slaps his hands against the steering wheel, the sound echoing through the stillness of the car. A growl sounding near animalistic emits from him in the driver’s seat, Grayson’s evident irritation scaring you a little.
“What just happened?” Your voice is tentative, not wanting to push and make him any more agitated.
“I think it’s pretty damn obvious, Y/N, the car broke down. Guess you’re stuck tolerating me for longer than you expected.” Somehow, despite his clear disdain, he retains his cool voice with you. Though you’re grateful he never gets too aggressive with you, the gallant aura he carries around you is infuriating. It’s even more infuriating that you find it so downright alluring. If this man wasn’t Ethan’s brother, you would have definitely either fucked him, punched him, or both by now.
“Lucky me.” You reach into your bag to pull out your phone to call Ethan, but he doesn’t pick up. He’s probably still driving, you think, and you shoot him a few texts crying for help.
You look up from your phone out the windshield and see the terrible weather condition you boh are situated in. Not only has the snow picked up, but there is no one else on the road for miles. Everything is just white, blanketed in layers of snow. You listen in on the conversation Grayson is currently having on the phone, with what you presume to be a tow truck service. “What do you mean it’s too bad outside? This is when people need your service the most! I don’t care if you’re following protocol, I’m with a girl and I can’t let her freeze out he- oh okay you know what? You bet your ass I’m gonna give you the worst Yelp review you’ve ever received.” You giggle at Grayson’s threat of a bad Yelp review, the most passive aggressive form of attack. Upon hearing you laugh he looks up at you from his phone after ending the call and cracks a smile. It was faint, but oh was it there. To be honest, it was kind of cute. A smile is different than the usual smirk he wears, but it was refreshing. It almost made you want to see that smile more often. Just almost.
“I don’t think one bad Yelp review is really gonna hurt their business,” you quip, trying to initiate anything to fill the silence.
“I’ll make a hundred different reviews if I have to.” You burst into a small laughing fit at his petty ideas and after a moment, your body is racked with a shiver, the freezing temperature outside finally catching up to you, the car having no heat to blast on you anymore. “You cold?”
“No, I’m just shivering for fun.” The quick moment of niceness between the two of you gone, you roll your eyes at his ridiculous question. Subconsciously, you run your hands up and down your arms in attempt to warm up a little.
“You can come sit on my lap, cupcake, I’ll warm you up.” He winks at you, his statement probably being a joke, but it would be totally be alright by you if it wasn’t. You had too much pride to admit it, but the thought of sitting yourself up on his lap and straddling him, isn’t the worst thing you could do right now. The problem is, if you were to actually crawl over and sit in his lap right now, he would win. You can’t be the one to want him. You can’t be the one to initiate whatever he was insinuating. No way in hell will you be the one to cave. No way in hell will you let Grayson Bailey Dolan win this game.
“I told you not to call me that.” That was all you could reply with, the thought of sex was clouding your mind, distracting from its usual quick-witted obscenities. You’ve thought of sex with Grayson before, it’s hard not to when he looks like he does, but you would never act on it because of how much you truly abhor him. But in the moment, the thought of hopping into the backseat, letting him fuck you to keep warm, seems pretty appealing.
“Ah, but you didn’t say no. Do you want that, kitten? You want me to warm you up?” Grayson’s words affect you and you don’t think you could keep your composure with him this close, leaning over the center console so close you feel the warmth of his breath in contrast to the cold air.
With him leaning over to you like he was, the nerves finally started to kick in. He’s never made you feel the way he is right now. You’ve never been this close to him: eyes locked, breaths mixing, dead silence except for the heaving of your chests, no Ethan to act as a buffer. You were suddenly, utterly, entranced in him and despite all the reasons that you should say no, despite all the reasons that your mind was telling you to resist, one voice in your head was prevalent and that was the only one you listened to. In a quiet, nearly inaudible whisper, you caved. “Yes.”
As if a switch flipped in him, Grayson went from his usual, straight-up cocky, to unsure. Never has Grayson ever had a reason to be unsure of himself, but here he was, jaw agape, eyes wide, unsure of his next move. “I-I really didn’t expect you to say yes, to be honest.”
“C’mon Muscles, don’t tell me you’re all talk.” You tease him, wondering whether or not the two of you were really down to go through with this. He sucked his teeth at the nickname, regaining his confidence, eyebrows quirking at the provocation.
“Trust me, cupcake. I’m a lot more than just talk.”
“Mmm, you say that but you’ve yet to prove it.”
“Get your pretty little ass in the back and prove it.” The look he gives you is downright filthy, staring down at you with hungry eyes. Excitement churns in your stomach and you prop yourself up and swiftly climb onto the back seat. You take your shoes off first and before you can even start on your sweatpants, he’s hopped back there as well, seated right beside you. Warm hands grab your face, pulling your gaze up to him. A split second of eye contact is too long a wait, Grayson tugging you by the back of your neck, connecting your lips instantly. You gasp into his mouth, not expecting him to be this rough straight from the get-go, and he takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss and immediately swipe his tongue against yours. You kiss back just as feverishly, relishing in his taste. He tastes of sweetness, an icing of sorts: he was probably baking back home before he had to come get you. As you kiss, tongues dancing with each other, you feel his hands rubbing on your back, near massaging before you feel your bra hooks come undone. He’s really not playing around, you think, Grayson breaking from your mouth to reach down and tug your sweatshirt off your body. You help him remove it, making sure you get your bra with it in the process. Grayson’s quick to pull you back into him, kissing up and down your neck. When he finds that spot near your ear that invokes a whimper from you, he latches his lips to it, surely sucking a bruise for you to wear as a medal. The sensation of him licking and marking you feels too good to pass up, so you let him leave his purple bruise and you just make a mental note to cover it up later.
Grayson travels down from your neck to your chest, trailing kisses across your breasts and circling his tongue around the nipple. As you moan in response, he adds to your stimulation squeezing your other breast and rolling the sensitive nub between his thumb and forefinger. You lean into his touch, eager to hurry him up and fast-forward the foreplay. “Can you skip the niceties and just take your pants off?”
Grayson lets out a chuckle, not even surprised that even in a time like this, you’re still giving him attitude. He sits back from you and lifts his shirt off and over his head. “Anything for you, babygirl.” You scoff at that, him being the king of unsolicited pet names for you, but seeing him untie the string of his joggers has you bouncing in excitement, annoyance thrown to the wind. You pull off your own pants, just in time to look back at him and see his cock spring up due to the loss of restriction, slapping against his navel. Grayson moves to sit in the middle of the backseat, spread out with his rock hard dick on display. “Come sit on my lap, pretty girl.”
You quickly adjust yourself to him, hovering over his lap. You sit on him rock yourself back and forth, his length rubbing between your folds, wetness coating him with every movement. He lets out a grunt and grips your thighs to halt your movements. Clearly not in the mood for teasing, Grayson takes control of you. “How about you stop being a brat and ride my dick like a good girl, huh?”
Taken aback, your mouth falls open but you nod frantically in submission. “Yes, sir.” You take him in your hand and guide him to your entrance. It burns initially as you lower yourself, his cock sinking into you, filling you up entirely. It’s been a while since you’ve had sex, and Grayson’s size is pretty intimidating without any prep.
“You’re so tight, cupcake, Jesus,” He practically moans into your neck, holding you close to his body. You whimper in response, that being the only noise you can muster up at the moment. Tears prick at your eyes, but you’ll be damned if you let Grayson see that he’s so big he made you cry; he doesn’t need that ego boost. Getting accustomed to his size, you start to roll your body slowly. His hands immediately reach around to grip your ass cheeks, pulling you against him and assisting your motion. The rolls get more frantic as you get more comfortable, switching to steady bounces, up and down on Grayson’s cock. You clench around him, the feeling of him in your guts too much to handle this fast. The sound of your skin slapping together echoes through the car, his breath hot as he kisses up your neck up to your ear. The connection between the two of you is magnetic, bodies working as one. Grayson humps up into you with harsh movements as you twist your hips in time with him. He stops for a second to relax more into the seat, sinking down to an almost horizontal position. In this position he has free reign, holding your waist steady as he thrusts up into you faster than before.
“Fuck Gray!” He’s deep inside you now, hitting that perfect spot to make your eyes roll to the back of your head as you scream out in pure ecstasy. He fucks you hard, pressing your g-spot as he goes, pushing you to your climax. “Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum, Gray, oh my god- fuck me,” you sputter out words that you can’t even hear to decipher, all senses tuned out, except for the one focused how good he’s making you feel in this moment. He pulls out of you at this point and flips you around, folding you in half, practically molding you into the shape of the seat. He bends your legs up to ceiling and pushes into you once more. Grayson’s destroying you. Your body is on fire and you’re not sure whether it’s because of all the stimulation or because he’s bending you into such a position that you normally can’t achieve without proper stretching. Either way, you’re not complaining because the way he’s leaning over you, cock slamming into you, balls slapping against your ass, you’ve never felt anything more euphoric. Even with it now being so hot in the car that the windows are foggy and Grayson dripping sweat on top of you, you’re moaning out in mere pleasure.
“Cum for me kitten, come on.” He props himself up with one bulging arm on the seat, his other hand presenting itself in front of your mouth. “Spit.” You spit onto his fingers just as he says, and moves his hand down to rub your clit as fast as he can while still keeping up his movements. His touch is overstimulating, your mouth falling open to scream but no sound even willing to come out. You open your eyes, not even realizing they’ve been shut for so long. One look up at him and you’re finished.
His eyebrows scrunched in concentration, lip rolled between his teeth, it’s all too much and you’re cumming harder than you ever have before. You pull him close, nails scratching down his back grasping to hold on for dear life. He takes you through your climax and doesn’t slow down when you’ve come back from your high. He keeps thrusting into you with determination, pounding your pussy like his life depends on it, leaving you overwhelmed by his touch. “Ah-fuck, Gray, oh my God, I-I can’t take it,” You’re practically begging for mercy and this point but he doesn’t stop in the slightest. If anything, he’s going harder, as if proving how hard he can fuck you.
“God, this pussy, fuck!” He pulls out of you just in time, cumming on your stomach, cum pooling in your navel. He drags two fingers down your abdomen, collecting his cum from where he just let go. His eyes travel from where he came, up to your face, and shoves his two fingers in your mouth. You’re sucking his finger clean when he rips his fingers out of your mouth and instead pulls you into a searing kiss, not having the patience to let you finish the job. He’s kissing you with a purpose: he’s telling you just how much he enjoyed fucking your brains out, how good it felt, and how much he wants to do it again. You felt it in that kiss. Whatever it is, you felt it. The heat, the fire, the frustration. All in that open-mouthed, dirty ass kiss. Your tongues clash together, the taste of his cum still lingering. As much as you hate to admit it, Grayson Dolan was one hell of a fuck.
“I was right.” He says after breaking the kiss, a trail of saliva from your mouth to his.
He wipes the spit that fell to his chin and smirks that signature smirk. He puts a finger under your chin, lifting your head up to meet his eyes. “About how you really just wanted to fuck me this whole time.”
“Shut up, you’re such a fucking prick.” You groan, leaning to the floor of the car and picking up a crumpled up napkin to wipe your stomach clean.
“Hey, hey, easy tiger, it was just a joke.” He leans down and gives you a light kiss to the nose. “I’m honored a girl like you would wanna fuck me.”
You snort at his cover, clearly just trying to charm his way to some extra brownie points. “As you should be.”
Grayson giggles as the two of you pull apart to sit up and start putting your clothes back on. You reach for your phone on the center console and see 6 missed calls and 10 texts from Ethan. You shoot him a text in apology, and send your location, per his request, for him to come help your long forgotten broken-down car situation. “E’s on his way. Play it smart and maybe you can get a round two when we finally get out of this damn storm.”
“Looking forward to it, cupcake.”
“Call me cupcake one more fucking time and you can consider the offer null and void.”
“You didn’t seem to mind it when you were riding my dick.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
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aplpaca · 2 years ago
Character Interpretation: Caleb Is Autistic And Heres Why
body language: 
has more muted/stoic facial expressions, even when highly emotional
happy hand flapping when proud of nott (this while his face is still less "expressive") 
hand wiggling/fidgeting when nervous (eg: when someone else is holding his books)
frumpkin is a very soft stim toy
avoids eye contact
verbal language:
monotone voice
very articulate when explaining concepts and ideas, but much less so when talking about non-informational topics
tends to go nonverbal when stressed even in general circumstances, not just when triggered 
emotional processing (which is obv hella impacted by past abuse):
has difficulty explaining his emotions to others, usually avoids doing so wherever possible
has difficulty processing his own emotions (eg: insisting that he wanted to save fjord, yasha, and jester “because their deaths would be a waste” rather than recognizing that he actually is fond of them) 
often talks out loud to himself to help work through conflicted feelings
his go-to response to uncomfortable situations, esp emotional ones, is “i walk away”
seemingly overattatched to familiar situations, difficulty with change:
Frumpkin Has To Be A Cat and he gets visibly distressed any time someone even suggests that frumpkin be something other than a cat, even when it would be advantageous 
keeps the same clothes despite them literally falling apart, even when wearing them is actively inhibiting his ability to get into fancier establishments that they need to get into for mission purposes 
practically had to be forced to get a new cloak even when he wouldn't have to throw out any of the stuff he already had
complete bafflement at beau's suggestion that he and nott could change some of the details of their schemes
social interactions:
can be super charismatic and convincing in more scripted and structured situations where there is a set goal for the interaction (like running a scam or getting information), but is awkward as hell in more casual/free-form or personal situations
hangs back for much longer than others before really engaging with any newcomers. 
“my social anxiety is getting the best of me so i am going to leave now”
bases his guesses of how to help/comfort others on what works for him (eg: his mentality of “frumpkin comforts me, therefore i will give frumpkin to person in need of comfort. problem solved.”), gets confused when this tactic isn't effective
gets thrown off and doesn't know how to react when others don't share the same fascinations as him
"This means we are friends."
hella good memory, his start as a prodigy also wouldn't be out of place
books and magic and stuff could easily be special interests
completely tunes out all other stimuli when reading/casting/etc
his connection to frumpkin as a support animal in general is very non-neurotypical
one track mind, hyperfixates on certain minor tasks (eg: need ink and paper need ink and paper. do you have ink and paper? does the gentleman have ink and paper? im going to ask everyone around me about ink and paper. several times. i can technically wait but i need ink and paper immediately right now actually)
nott’s comment to beau that was like “no hes not talking to you right now. but sometimes when he stares off blankly and says things he actually is talking to you”
hella eccentric but often doesn't register just how eccentric he's being (describes other people in the group as "weirdos" but also Bread Is Warm On Hands No I Dont Want Actual Mitts I Cant Eat Those Why Would You Even Ask That)
so yeah, caleb reads as autistic, this concludes my tedtalk
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petty-revenge-stories · 3 years ago
Chew me out because YOU'RE late? I hope you're patient!
A little bit of context: I work at a certain hardware store as the vault/computer room employee. I come in early at around 5h15AM each weekend to prepare the register money, count the bills and do some tech support.
I usually stay in the computer room, locked behind two heavy, locked doors, containing the safe and a computer where i do my stuff. I send the money with a tube system that connects to the registers so I dont have to walk all the way over there each time someone needs something.
Now, there's this new manager. Well, not really a manager but a "head cashier", which is like a super-cashier i guess. She is always very stressful and thinks very highly of herself. She is very condescending and loves to remind me that she is "the head cashier for a reason" even though I have the same job title as her, except I work in the computer room, and due to conflicts of interests, I cannot be head cashier and vault employee, which is fine.
Also, this girl is all over the place. I have a very strict schedule to send the tubes and the "head cashier till", which is a padlocked drawer containing money if the cashiers need some extra 20s or rolls of change. Usually, I sent that around 8 o'clock in several tubes, but she's late and calls my phone in a PANIC shrieking about the till and "it should be HERE ALREADY?!? You should do your job!! Im freaking out over here! Send it now!" and she hangs up on me without even a good morning. Thing is, it would be very irresponsible to send that amount of money in an unsupervised location without anyone checking it is safely put in the drawer, so I don't send it until someone calls me.
I decide to plot a petty revenge that had me cackling all morning. You see, the till contains a lot of money, so I must send it in several tubes. To place that money in the drawer, you need a special key. If you dont have the key, the tubes are just gonna pile up while you wait in front of the machine because you can't just leave that cash there even though the store is not open at that point, the store opens at 8 on weekends. It usually takes around 10 minutes to receive/send all the tubes and it's a good thing to send the key first so the head cashier on the other end can begin unloading the tubes in the drawer and process augmentations if they need to.
So I sent the key last.
I know its SUPER petty, but just the thought of this huge control freak opening tube after tube and not finding the key while she has to rush because she's one hour late is hilarious to me. As soon as I began sending the tubes my phone started ringing, it was her. I kept sending my tubes in feigned ignorance, keeping the key until the very last tube, while the phone ringed with the head cashier probably freaking out at the other end.
Made my day a tiny bit better.  (source) (story by areesaw)
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beesmygod · 2 years ago
netflix’s new horror movie “bird box” sucks ass and not in a funny, enjoyable way: a review
first im going to preface this review with this: im sick. i caught a cold on the way home from reno and spent the day recovering watching this garbage instead of doing anything that required a working brain. i knew i wasn’t going to get anything mind-blowing but “bird box” teeters heavily on “insultingly bad” instead of just “bad” and it kept me mad about having wasted two hours of my life for a solid 24 hours straight.
so if this review doesn’t make sense, its partly because im sick, and partly bc this movie doesn’t make sense. this review is also impossible to structure because i dont even know where to begin. maybe here: the directing is derivative, boring and bad. its like watching paint dry. the whole movie looks like your grandma’s house smells.
to re-iterate: this movie is 2 hours long. i’ll save you 2 hours by telling you that you never see the monster, ever. sandra bullock admitted to laughing out loud repeatedly on set at the monster when it was revealed to her which lead to it being cut from the movie. if we had seen the monster, maybe the movie would have been bumped up from a d- to a c+ just because the mental image of a long green baby with john malkovich’s voice is pretty funny.
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the bird box, probably
for a movie about a monster, this movie has a serious monster problem. in that the monster is not a problem. the monster (which is never given a name in the movie) can’t seem to actually do anything to you if you don’t look at it. its only power seems to be making you kill yourself when you see it (unless you’re crazy which, thats a whole other kettle of fish. give me a minute). so if you don’t look at it you’re fine? there’s several points in the movie where the monster is physically close to them but doesn’t actually do anything except beg them to take off their blindfolds and look at them. its almost pathetic. as far as i can tell, the monster’s only powers are to make leaves fly upward for no reason (i.e. to indicate its in the area without the camera having to focus on anything specific) and yell at you. but, like, as long as you don’t take off your blindfold (and somehow, people do in this movie) then you’re probably fine.
now, if you’re “crazy” (I KNOW YOU’RE ALREADY ASKING QUESTIONS HOLD ON) then looking at the monster turns you into a stereotypical evangelist for an eldritch horror. you run around saying “crazy” things that read like enemy npc chatter in ps2 era survival horror game. for example:
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then, you spend all your time trying to get people to look at it by holding their eyes open. “bird box” does not bother to explain what “crazy” means in this context. according the the story, roving gangs of tokyo-drifting escaped asylum patients rule the post-apocalyptic landscape of the pacific northwest. its impossible to tackle how many layers of like morally wrong it is to yet again shove the mentally ill into the role of antagonists  (im getting exhausted just thinking about piling up all the reasons this is so fucking bad) to the point of making them a fucking enemy class. its almost more succinct just to point out that “bird box” thinks mental illness is an on/off switch you toggle rather than a spectrum. i know this movie is a relic of the past (dec 2018) but i feel like this is such a basic fact about the world as we know it today that the decision to ignore it makes me wonder if the writer was operating under the assumption that horror monster “rules” need to be clearly defined as though they were conceived for use in a videogame.
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if_crazy=“yes”,  then bird=box 
speaking of the titular “bird box”: the movie is called that because they literally keep birds. in a box. the birds tell you when the monster is coming, so you can put on your blindfold. but heres the thing: the monster makes GGGGRRRRRROOORRORORO sounds nonstop when its running around in the area. you know when it’s coming. you can hear it coming from a mile away. so there’s really no point in having, a bird box. at one point the monster is so loud they can’t hear the birds over its roaring. whats the point of the birds? as it turns out, the birdbox, is useless. much lIKE THIS MOVI
this movie is a never ending cascade of cliches and stolen plot points, characters, ideas. it steals from “the happening” (blatantly, its the same movie right down to the ugly color scheme of every frame), “dawn of the dead”, “pontypool”, “the mist” and pretty much every post-apocalyptic monster movie ever. bd wong is confirmed as a gay man literally 2 minutes before he dies on screen. the black comedic lead dies next. a pregnant woman is introduced and you’ll NEVER guess what happens to her. you could set your watch to this movie. its pathetic. 
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welp, he’s dead
i’m going to link this guy’s deconstruction of the weird incestual overtones that are also impossible to miss and interpret without wanting to die. 
im getting exhausted again. this movie is not fun bad. this post is to serve as a warning to the curious. in fact, im going to spoil the end for you, so you truly understand why i’m so fucking mad. i want you, right now, to imagine based on what i’ve told you what the most hackney, cliche, stupid, moronic ending twist could be to this movie about a monster you can’t look at. fully form it in you head. dare to imagine the dumbest thing you can.
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sugardaddykenma · a year ago
Could I request hcs on how a friends with benefits relationship would go with Sakusa, Atsumu and Oikawa?
 no thots head empty just the concept of fooling around w any of the men of hq
aged up, ended up being v nsfw, idk im just vibing through this fandom with the will of god and a redbull, also this kinda got long?? oops
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••• friends with benefits relationship •••
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✧ Miya Atsumu ✧
stupid little shit
it definitely started with a drunk hookup, and the next day the both of you were like fuck fuck fuck fuck
so you both agree it was definitely worth it, but you didnt see eachother romantically working at all
i believe your exact words were “i would rather eat several live lobsters that have been doused in laundry detergent than date you, but i will not disagree on the fact that your dick is um vaguely bomb”
he laughed, you feigned puking
it works because you both have such busy lives that the very concept of investing emotionally into a real relationship is terrifying
that and you both need fucking therapy bro
yall definitely have mutual friends, and whenever youre all hanging out he’ll send you the raunchiest texts
“im gonna pretend to leave, then you go to the bathroom, and i fuck you into oblivion” “atsumu we’re at a brunch”
“thinking about your pretty mouth around my cock 💕” “atsumu its their 22nd birthday for fucks sake we havent even been here 30 mins” “ok, did you want a dick pic tho”
it worked well for perhaps three months? and then there was a shift in the energy big time.
mans was less into Fun Hook-up and instead was looking at you with heart eyes in missionary
hes the kind of dude who keeps saying “don’t go falling in love with me” when it is very clear that he is catching feelings
you call him out on it and the more fun hook-ups resume - we love to see some fun public sex hoooooooooooooooooooo boy
the reality is sex (and praise) is the way to his heart, fuckwad
you notice hes been texting you constantly, but youre fine with it
but he GETS hella grumpy when you talk about a hookup and adds it to your list of rules “dont talk about ugly hookups” “atsumu they were hot tf”
then one night he invites you over for drinks and food, and he ends up just talking about how he doesnt want you seeing anyone else and that hes falling for you
and youre like,,,, hmm yikes. how do you even gO ON A DATE WITH SOMEONE YOUVE FUCKED SO MANY TIMES
really? tell me how you can do the whole jittery first date when he’s literally had his face between your legs.
 you cant
bUT OF COURSE YOU DO IT ANYWAYS, he ends up planning a picnic and talking about how hes serious about you
and you go “okay but none of that boring sex please,,,,,,” and it truly was a match made in heaven.
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✧ Oikawa Tooru✧
are you kidding me, i wanna punch this man 4 out of 7 days of the week
youre in his phone as “fucko bucko❤️” and yes its as gross as it seems, hes in your phone as “dnruh” (do not respond unless horny)
oikawa doesnt do fwb because he likes having control and ownership but yall are friends and hopelessly attracted to eachother
it just happened kinda naturally early on in your friendship, where you were discussing alien conspiracy theories - newsflash it is impossible to break into area 51 shittykawa - and then you’re on top of him
you definitely dont want to date him because he has too many fangirls and way too many commitment issues
yall put the FRIENDS in friends with benefits
like yes, you have sex in the bathroom of the stadium hes playing in before a game
but yall also just spend all your time together doing stupid shit, like long bike rides and DESTROYING children in dance dance revolution at the arcade no mercy a kid ran home and cried
definitely needs you to attend home games so he can flex, but made you promise to close your eyes when he serves
sometimes he’ll just send you nudes throughout the day and youre like “??? oikawa its 11am” and hes like “yes and?”
those nudes are really well done, truly the man understands the beauty of self timer, colourful lighting, and hot expressions.
absolutely the type of man to have a spotify playlist for when you come over, just because he weirdly wants you to like the music he picks for you
one time just drunkenly says “don’t you think you’ll ever want something more?” and youre brain just sounds like gunshots
like sure youve thought about it, but you didnt think HE DID
when you ask him about it the next day hes like - who me? no. wrong bitch. that is not me.
it gets a little bit charged in front of your mutual friends
like he’ll pull you into his lap at parties and whisper in your ear jokes
or he will force you to be his partner for pong even though hes terrible but for some reason you cant say no to his puppy pout face
and everyones like “yep just friends suuuuuuuuuure fuckers gl hf”
youre both seeing other people, but you start seeing this one guy a little more intensely and stupidkawa is just like“how much longer are we gonna go without telling anyone?”
youre like THE FUCK bro what do you MEAN
after this your relationship is a little weird
minus the one time you drunkenly called him to pick you up and he fucked you in his car
but it taKES MONTHS before hes mans up and is like “hello this arrangement is not working please let me Try to Date you”
the rest is history*
*alien conspiracy theories for the rest of your life
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✧ Kiyoomi Sakusa✧
ill start off by saying: i want sakusa kiyoomi to rock me like a fucking hurricane, just destroy me emotionally and physically bro
i think that if you end up in a fwb relationship, its because you know him from a class or you play for the unis womens team
like youre in eachothers circles, and you hook up one night and neither of you really saw it coming
tbh he doesnt really sleep around too much, but the man is very very adamant on talking about your sexual history and last STI test we stan a communicative king in sex truly,,,, always
it was supposed to be a one time thing, but then one day he just texts you like “hey. come over” and youre like “is this?? a booty call??” and hE DEADPAN RESPONDS “yes. if you’re down.”
it becomes a regular weekly thing where you guys hook up, sometimes more, because this man Has Needs and so do you
holy rest in pieces because this man with PLAY with your head
you’ll be having the best sex of your life, eating takeout with the man, and then he’ll be like “okay bye”. LIKE BRO??????
and he’ll text you at random times like “wanna drop off a pair of your panties at my apartment when you’re on your way to class?”, or “got you a new necklace” with a photo of his hands - or act all dry for awhile
but then he’ll start asking things like “are you keeping me a secret?” and “how many other people are you sleeping with?”
at first you were like, maybe he just wants to gauge where youre at and his sexual health, but then you’re like hmmmm.
it starts a few months into the relationship, where you mention that you went on a date with someone and he just gets extra quiet and gets moody when yall are watching the notebook
fun fact: sakusa loves watching sad romances, he says its “emotionally healthy to have a time to cry” which is ridiculous and he refuses to watch horror movies with you 
then you notice he begins to keep a mask for you at his place, and when you call him out about it, he just shrugs and says “bought it and thought of you”
one night just rolls over and says “relationships aren’t my thing, but you are” and you’re like ????????????????? but he’s already snoring
then one day he kisses you before he leaves your apartment and mAN JUST WALKS OUT BEFORE YOU CAN SAY ANYTHING
this fucker is tryna pavlov you into loving him so he doesnt have to confess
and its working.
eventually you start expecting all the little intimate moments he produces, like smiling at you before serving at a game (And asking you to come to his home games as goodluck)
one day after work you go to his out of habit and when you realize you YELL at him about your feelings and that “if hes going to act like your boyfriend he better man up and fucking be yours” and hes like “ya i thought we were dating”
absolutely give this man the electric chair, even if hes cute about it
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Alright clowns, here are my thoughts on 15x20. This is all just hopeful speculation but even my straight male friends think Cas will be back based on my points here.They never considered Destiel before episode 18 and now they see it. 
Reasons I think Cas will be back: 
- The title card for the season is the empty goo, not anything to do with chuck??? thats just weird. Could episode 20 focus on the empty? What else could it focus on now? WHY IS THE TITLE CARD EMPTY GOO? 
- The whole “chuck ending” vs “free will ending” theory is BRILLIANT and I LOVE IT. If you are unaware of this theory, basically people think 19 was chucks shitty cliche ending and we will get the real ending in 20. It makes so much sense because...
- no ones relationships got resolved in the 19th episode. Where is Eileen? why doesnt Sam seem to care??? why didnt Jack bring his DAD back when he became god? He loves Cas, he wouldnt just leave him in the empty to relive his worst memories over and over. Why didnt dean ASK Jack when he asked Chuck earlier in the episode? Its all just really weird. Plus at the end of the montage they shut the impala trunk which has ALWAYS indicated “we have work to do” like “this isnt over yet”. Its never symbolized the end. That would make no sense to use if it was the real ending. 
- Jensen did not say Cas was dead in his panel, in fact he didnt talk about it at all. True the questions were filtered but WHY unless Cas was a character he couldnt talk about???? I think if Cas was really gone Jensen would say so outright and talk about how much he loved working with Misha. Weird. Plus when asked Misha was like “Im not telling you if Cas is in the finale” WHY if Misha already said Cas is gone would he not say “no Im not in the finale that was it for Cas”? Other actors have said they are done outright, why not Misha? 
-Jensen said he KNOWS how much Destiel means to people and he and Misha traded fan react videos to 18 and Jensen left it open to interpretation in 18. He said Dean was procesing what was happening just like we thought, he didnt say Dean doesnt reciprocate. BUT Even if Misha isnt back in the last episode I dont think Jensen would ever agree to have Dean say he doesnt love him back romantically. He knows it would hurt us. 
-Jensen had to talk to Kripke about the ending. Kripke wrote Dean as this straight playboy initially so this would line up perfectly. And Kripke told him he was too close to it and to step back and look at it from a fan perspective. Interesting love Cas. Fans love Dean and Cas together. So obviously fans dont want Cas to stay in the empty right? Even if they dont explicitly make this full canon, they could imply it and maybe thats what Jensen needed to wrap his head around for a minute? He said he gets the ending now. But he said Kripke had to break it down for him before he got it. Maybe Kripke was like the shows evolved since 2005 and thats not a bad thing and its fine if thats the direction its gone?? It’s just INTERESTING that he had to talk to the shows creator about the end. 
- The confession scene was the FIRST SCENE they wrote for Season 15. Weird. Odd if it wasnt going to be a huge focal point of the season. Why write that first? I went to film school (not that I work in the industry now but I still studied this shit) and thats WEIRD to do for a first scene if its not super important to the season arc. 
- You cant discount all the build up throughout the show. Even if it wasnt their original intention, the comparisons of Dean and Cas to Cain and his love interest were a HUGE turning point. Exact parallel of “she asked me to stop” flash foward to Cas literally asking Dean to stop. Obvious much? They know all this from fans now and are like wow we really laid some groundwork here didnt we? Why do you think they gave us that confession? If they didnt realize all the groundwork laid they wouldnt have done it because it would have felt out of nowhere. Clearly they didnt think it felt out of nowhere. Clearly Dean’s happiness depends on Castiel being there. As a friend, as a lover, WHATEVER it might be, Dean needs Cas to be happy. Period. 
- Andrew Dabb created the Empty. Andrew Dabb loves Cas as a character. Andrew Dabb is writing the last episode. How INTERESTING.
I could just be clowning but all of this is just so weird that I think we are onto something here people. Jensen said 20 is going to be BIG. HOW COULD IT BE BIG UNLESS THEY ARE HIDING HUGE PLOT POINTS FROM US? 
PS why hasnt Dean had a serious female love interest since season 5/6?
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angrylizardjacket · 2 years ago
lead up {Ben Hardy}
Anon asked: Could you write a Ben Hardy imagine about anything cause I’m dying for a bit of Ben 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
A/N: 1367 words. An idea I had at work. Was it requested? Not technically. Was it fun? Yes. Is it fluffy? God I hope so.
You’re still in your sweatpants, curled up in bed and reading something on your phone, when Ben comes into the hotel bedroom, informing you the hair and makeup would arrive within the hour. When you tell him that they shouldn’t bother, without looking up from where you’re engrossed in your phone, he frowned at you.
“You went and saw Venom like eight times, and yet you won’t come see this?” He asked, and you sighed, resting your phone in your lap.
“I don’t know anyone in Venom.” You said, curling up tighter. “And it’s different…” Voice getting smaller, you look up at him, a soft expression on your face, a nervousness you’d been trying not to feel for weeks. “It’s a premiere, Ben, there’s so many people.” You mused, and Ben sat on the edge of the bed, careful to avoid where your dress was carefully laid out.
“It’s alright, it’s just like any other movie-” He began but you sat up straight, frowning, anxiety twisting your stomach into knots.
“I’m just… I’m me, and you’re one of the stars of the movie, and there’s a red carpet and, if I’m being honest, the idea of watching you on the big screen is nerve wracking.” You admitted, to which he made a confused face.
“I know you saw Apocalypse-”
“That was before we met, Ben. It doesn’t count. Back then I could just watch your beautiful face and not know what it was like to-” your voice catches in your throat as your anxiety rises, and you feel yourself flush before the words come out. Ben, however, just raises his eyebrows at you, intrigued.
“Know what?” He asked, voice low and amused as he moved to sit up beside you on the bed. You shuffled over, making room, waiting for him to get settled before leaning against him.
“Nothing dirty, just…” Reaching over you take his hand where he’s got it rested on your thigh. Just being close to him was calming you down somewhat, and you took in a deep breath, before you turned and pressed your face to his shoulder. “It’s sappy, okay?” You huffed, and you can hear him laugh softly, can feel it gently shaking his shoulders.
“It’ll be fine, okay? I’ll be right beside you.” He promised, before scooting from the bed. He doesn’t let go of your hand, even as he stands up, and you watch him, quiet and contemplative. He gives you a gentle tug, hand still out where it holds yours, as if offering. “Shower? We’ve still got half an hour until they arrive.” He’s grinning at you, and your anxiety eases as you get up.
“She sits so well.” The makeup artists that had been hired for you for the even grinned from you to Ben, as you sat patiently getting your makeup done, wearing only a robe after your shower. Ben was already half dressed sitting a few feet away from you as someone fussed over his hair. “‘s like she’s been doing this for years.” The makeup artist turns back to you, powdering just beneath your eyes.
“She puts up with me, she can put up with anything.” You can hear the grin in Ben’s words, even though you can’t turn to see it, and you feel yourself flush.
“You make it sound like dating you is a chore.” You tried not to change your expression too much as work began on your eyes. You hear both the makeup artist and Ben laugh. “It’s not.” You clarify, which only causes Ben to laugh harder.
“I know you wouldn’t stay if it were.” There’s such genuine affection in his words that it makes your heart grow warm, and you reach out blindly.
“Ben. Ben.” You mutter, hand wiggling in the empty air by his chair. The hair stylist laughs softly, though it’s not unkind, not that you care either way.
“What?” You hear Ben ask, and you let yourself smile, a little abashed.
“That was sweet, give me your hand.” You can feel yourself flush as you say it out loud, but your hand remains hovering in the air, wiggling your fingers for a moment before letting them still, hand open in a simple offer.
“What?” He laughs a little.
“Ben, gimme your hand, my eyes are closed.” You explained, and there was silence. After a beat, you feel the makeup artist move back from working on your face, and when you open your eyes, she’s got a hand on either of the seat’s armrests and pulls the chair close to Ben’s. When she looks back at you, you flush with slight embarrassment, but then you feel Ben’s fingers linking with your own. He’s giving you a fondly amused smile when you look over at him, and you give his hand a gentle squeeze before you both drop contact and let the team finish their work.
“Hey, can you zip me up?” When Ben emerges from the bathroom to help you, he’s in his full suit, and your mouth goes dry for a moment. Moving on instinct, you suck in your stomach as much as you can while he zips up the back of your dress, and when you turn to face him, he catches you by the elbows, leaning back to look over your red carpet look.
“You look...” it actually takes him a moment to drag his gaze from your body to your eyes, and there’s something almost hungry in the look he gives you, “spectacular.”
“You don’t look so bad yourself.” You find your voice with a grin, stepping forward and back into his space, wrapping your arms around him. The stylists had left almost a full half an hour ago, and there wasn’t much time before you had to head down to the car.
“I don’t wanna smudge your lipstick.” His eyes sparkle, looking very much like he’d love to smudge your lipstick, but he’s gentle when he moves in, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. His hands move to cup your face, drawing back from you, your cheeks just a little flushed, the stain of your lipstick on his lips.
“You look good like that.” You muse, bringing your thumb up to wipe the colour from his lips, and he grins. “But what would the fans think.” Though your joking tone was light, the mood dampened with the real anxiety that bubbled up in you.
“They’re going to love you.” He assured, hands gentle as he pulled you in to kiss you on the cheek. “And everyone who doesn’t can shove it.” That gets you to grin, and you want to kiss him in return, but you remember how much time and effort went in to your look, and you refrain. 
An assistant comes to call on you both, and Ben takes your hand, leading you through the hall of the hotel, keeping you close. In the elevator, he grins at you.
“One more, for luck?” He asks, and you flush, he’s leaning over, as if expecting you to kiss his cheek, but you shift to kiss him on the lips, smiling wide as the two of you break apart.
“A lipstick print on your cheek?” You asked, and Ben shrugged, still grinning to himself, leaving the faint colour on his lips.
“Would be a very Roger thing to do, wouldn’t it?” He mused, and you snorted out a laugh, pulling the tube of lipstick from your purse and reapplying it.
“If you start throwing TVs out windows, we’re going to have a problem.” You told him, just as the doors opened to the below ground parking, where the others were waiting in the limo. 
“You two match.” Joe smirked between the two of you as you climbed into the back seat, the door shutting behind you. He’s not talking about your outfits. You flush, pleased and unashamed, and once you’re buckled in, Ben slings an arm around you, grinning at his costar, the smile conveying so much without a single word passing from his lips.
Gwilym sighs, Joe actually laughs, Rami’s not really paying attention, and you? You just try to keep smiling as you all head to the premiere. Ben holds you a little tighter, and it gets much easier to smile.
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jewpacabruhs · 3 years ago
so something's been bothering me for a while & i want to address it, and that's how kyle broflovski's jewishness is treated in this fandom.
im aware that this fandom, like most, is largely populated by non-jews. that's just part of being a minority. and im plenty used to judaism being disrespected. but the thing is, within this fandom, yall dont mean to. it's not genuine hatred or even disdain, it's just ignorance. and ignorance is easily remedied, so i’m gonna attempt to do that rn. if u wanna hear what i have to say, and honestly u should bc learning new perspectives is super important, pls read on. and i hope i don’t sound condescending, cuz im not trying to be; i’m just a lil fed up, and understandably.
i think the ignorance of sp fans, primarily kyman shippers (and i am one) is best illustrated by how people throw around kyle's religion & ethnicity like it's a personality trait. the same way yall lovingly call cartman ur "evil lil fatass" and kenny is affectionately referred to as a "saintly lil immortal", and shit like that? kyle's called a "fiesty lil jew", and other variations of that. and it's from a good place, it’s meant fondly, but it's involuntarily dehumanizing and alienating. a personal story: i spent most of ninth grade w a group of guy "friends" who repeatedly made fun of my jewishness, not maliciously, but enough that it eventually started to hurt. i had one guy who, every time he saw me, went "how's my favorite jew bitch?!" and it was funny at the time, but looking back, it fucking sucks to be reduced down to your religion. 
and i hope that one day kyle might even confront cartman about passively referring to him as "jew" so often, because, while it's not as terrible as some of cartmans other anti-jewish behavior, it's still bad. and you guys replicating that, & enabling it, regardless of whether u don’t mean anything by it, is fucking hurtful. im well-aware that anti-semitism, no matter how nonchalant, is still rampant, & im uber-aware how rampant it is amongst kyman fans, and it'd be wishful thinking to hope that i can change everyone's mind on this, but i wanna try none the less.
i think it's important to look into how to correctly portray jewish characters - whether u ask someone (like me! im happy to help!) or u look for resources online. jewish identity is so complex, & especially in teenagers (which is the age most sp writers set their fics at), when jewish kids are realizing what their judaism means, to them & to the world. take the time to put some work into that part of kyle, or at the very least try not to be offensive about it. u can make kyle nonreligious, that's fine, but don't be anti-jewish in the process. and ik it's hard to write about things u dont understand, but fandom is primarily composed of straight girls writing about gay ships, & they manage, so i think yall goyim can manage to write about a jewish character in a semi-decent way.
and for artists? im awfully tired of seeing kyle with stars of david on him in fanart. especially huge ones on his sweater & shit like that. not only does it strip him of personality by exclusively focusing on his religion, it's also obscenely inaccurate. as jews, we can't be visibly jewish out in public. it's unsafe. hasidic jews can, within their communities, but even then, nothing could stop a violent anti-semite from attacking them. as for reform and conservative jews, who live life amongst goyim, and especially for young ones in high school, the best we can do is wear a small magen david necklace, preferably under our shirt; keeping our identities close to our hearts, but ourselves safe. i think yall doubt how violent antisemitism can get. we can genuinely be murdered just for being jewish. unlike black folks, who can't hide their skin color & can't avoid the treatment they receive due to said skin color, jews can hide our jewishness, & we're fucking grateful for it. cuz it's a scary world. we're proud of being jews, but we don't flaunt it, for our own protection. being jewish is being discrete in a world that's not safe for us. so when artists plaster a big old magen david on kyle, as if he'd ever wear that and allow people to make assumptions & potentially end up in harms way? i cringe p bad.
and i know i sound like a whiny jew & yall think it's not that deep but it's important for people to know. kyle's jewishness isn't just a personality trait, and it's definitely not an accessory; it's a piece of his identity, even if he's too young to realize it in canon. he may be a fictional character, but judaism isn't fictional, & it's important it's treated respectfully. so please; make an effort.
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worstloki · 10 months ago
Thor: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Bruce: I’ve been hulked out for the past few hours.
Valkyrie: I got drunk about halfway through.
Loki: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
#stolen from @hogwartshousefriends#all these fics and headcanons about the revengers managing life on the statesman are funny to read because they would NOT be functional#as if bruce aint a human who hulks out and knows nothing about alien society and how to organise huge groups of people who he could hurt#as if valkyrie wouldn't have been dealing with an alcohol shortage or being drunk 24/7because remember she stuck around for revenge or death#as if thor isn't having to step up as king when he is NOT prepared to do that and likely has zero proper formal decision-making skills#seriously loki is the only one there who would be able to set things up functionally in a decent way after crisis management#crisis management which was literally what loki spent a thousand years following thor around and doing too#loki actually does have the most experience ruling at that point and the actual way ragnarok should have ended was them BOTH on the throne#im so mad the trilogy ended the way it started#dont get me wrong it was a great full-circle thing and would've worked IF Thor had actually finished his arc and Loki's hadn't reversed#Loki's arc leaving him subservient to Thor again because he *wanted* to be? okay fine I'll let it pass because he is pretty selfless and all#but the fact that THOR actively got WORSE than he was in Thor 1?? He's back to jumping into things without thinking them through??#that he's actually CONSCIOUS of how he's being bad and he's STILL DOING IT??#Thor: The Dark World took Thor a step back in order to let him learn and grow but thats not what happened and its so ?!?!#Thor got butchered before the villain of the film was even introduced#😔😔😔
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hvllevator · 2 years ago
BTS reaction (hyung line): comforting them
request: One where the boys struggle with their looks and reader helps them love themselves?
a/n: took me way too long to write this so im separating these into hyung and maknae lines. i dont have the heart to write someone insult the boys so i just made this into comforting them ones rather than about their looks but i will make that for maknae line ok im saying too much. enjoy!
masterlist | maknae line
(gifs arent mine)
Jin has been under a lot of pressure recently and you understood where this was coming from, with the comeback taking place and all. Jin felt mad at himself for not getting himself together, this lead to what he thinks are poor performances and how he easily snaps on the other members. He apologized to them almost as soon as he got mad but the members couldn't see him like this. Namjoon called you, telling you about Jin's current state and you told him you'll be right over.
Arriving with bags of food for the boys, you entered their dance studio and they immediately crowded over you at the site of food. All of them except for one. You excused yourself and head over to the corner where Jin was sitting at.
"Hey." You greeted him, taking in his current state. Sweat trickling down his face, face slightly red.
"What are you doing here?" Jin let out, immediately realizing what he just said, "I'm sorry, hey baby how are you?"
"I'm fine Jin, the question is, are you?" You frowned, sitting down beside him and grabbing his hand into yours.
"I don’t know, Y/N." He sighed. "I'm so bad with dealing stress, I just don't know how to act. With the members especially, I feel like I'm just adding onto their headache."
"Don't say that." His head slowly falling onto your shoulder. "You know the boys love and understand you all the time. You're all going through the same things but just coping with it differently. Just because you got stressed doesn't mean everything is not going the way its supposed to be. You're doing great and you always have. I am so proud of everything you have accomplished. I love you, you will get through this."
As you finished your small speech, you felt tears falling down on your shirt as it started to soak. "Thank you, Y/N. I love you so much."
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Namjoon wasn’t been feeling the best lately, with comeback season starting. He felt exhausted and he felt stress all the time. With not having the peace of mind he wanted, this lead to poor performances, even though the boys assured him countless of times that he was doing greatly. He somehow didn’t think of their words wholeheartedly. Namjoon came home that night, just wanting everything to be over, you were lying on our shared bed, with book in hand. Namjoon came trudging through the door with a heavy heart. You caught sight of his state and you pushed your book aside, opening your arms to him, this to which he climbed quickly.
“What’s wrong, Joonie?” You whispered, rubbing his back gently.
“I feel so stressed, Y/N, I feel like everything I’m contributing is wrong. I keep getting the steps wrong and my throat has been hurting so much recently. I feel like I’m letting everyone down just because I let my stress get to me. I just want everything to be over.” Namjoon poured out, letting a few tears shed out of his eyes.
“Oh, Joon.” You started, cradling his face in your hands. “You’re not letting anybody down, it’s quite opposite actually. Army’s are super proud of you and they always will be. Don’t even get me started with your members, they look up to you, not just as a leader, but as a brother to them.” You kissed his forehead, “I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if you took the time off, you’re doing absolutely great but you should never overwork yourself, Namjoon. Army’s love it when you’re on stage but they will love it more if you had proper rest.”
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Yoongi couldn't take it anymore. With the world tour, who wouldn’t be pressured and tired. You were not able to come along with him on tour for you were also busy with your own business in life. Yoongi was constantly messaging you and calling you, telling you he needed you there with him, that everything was too much to handle. You felt sad, Yoongi was usually a tough man to crack but when he reaches his breaking point, everything just shatters.
Your phone was ringing, you checked the time and the number 2:21 flashed before your eyes. You looked at the ID caller and saw it was Yoongi and immediately answered it. "Hey baby, what's wrong?" You croaked out, it was apparent at your voice that you just woke up.
"Shit, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called-"
"No, no it's fine. What happened?" You assured
"I need you." Was all he said that was enough to make your heart hurt. "I can't stand it anymore, Y/N. I need you here with me, I feel like everything is out of control and I-I can't handle it alone." His voice cracked.
"Oh Yoongi," You sat up on your bed. "you're never alone. You have great people around you that are willing to be there for you."
"They're not you." Yoongi let out. "I love them to death but it's not the same with you. You're my actual home."
"I'm not gone. I'm just miles away but I will always be here for you, no matter what happens." You started, "I may not be there physically but you know I'm one call away. Everything will be over soon and you're doing great, Yoongi, I hope you know that."
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Hoseok wasn't being himself lately. His usual bubbly and bright self was missing. He felt like his dances wasn't enough. His voice was getting raspy and this messed with him so much. Hoseok arrived at your shared home, not even sparing you a glance which was very unusual, he bolted straight into your bedroom. This worried you so you decided to go after him and see what was wrong.
You gently knocked on the door, waiting for a response. Hearing a small, "Come in." You pushed open the door and saw Hoseok laying on the bed, under the covers.
"What's wrong, love?" You asked, careful not to sound to clingy.
"I'm so tired, Y/N." Was all he said that almost made you cry.
"Tired of what exactly, baby?" Slipping onto the bed next to him. You felt him move closer to you, gently  grabbing onto your waist.
"Everything is so much, and I can't take it anymore." He cried out.
"Hoseok, you're doing great. You have been coping so well and I'm so proud of what you have done." Pressing a soft kiss on top of his head. "Your fans love you and they will support you throughout everything, as will I. I love you."
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warmau · 2 years ago
hi hi!! i was just wondering if u could write me a quick next door neighbor!changkyun??? bc i would melt and wilt away anyway mom i lovE your writing so so much youre one of my favorite blogs and i constantly revisit and reread all of your works, especially the monsta x ones anyway sorry for this,,, (feel free to not do it if u dont want to/cant!) i hope you have a great day
in which you’re convinced your apartment is haunted and changkyun thinks that’s kind of funny hfdkgkd
it all starts with a sound
sometimes it comes from the bathroom, sometimes it comes from the kitchen
you’ll be laying in bed, the lights all out, quietly trying to lull yourself into sleep
when you’ll hear it 
and your eyes shoot open, body frozen under the sheets
there’s no heavy breathing or footsteps
but there is a sound - like something is making its way, fast and clicking through your apartment
you don’t have a pet - so you rule that out
and it’s not a thud or a muffled voice - so it can’t be your neighbors
you realize, one night, when the sound comes echoing through the walls at three in the morning
oh my god my apartment is haunted
you first try and turn the lights on, hoping the ghost wont like it and will stay away
but the noise dont stop
you ask a friend of yours, jooheon, to come over and help you scare it away
but just at the mere mention of something scary - he opts out and makes up an excuse about having to go to the doctors
you’re stuck sitting up, wrapped in your blankets, staring at the dark walls of your room
waiting for this ghost to come out at again
to brush a cold hand over your shoulder, to knock your lamp over or break some of your dishes
it scares you more than you’d like to admit 
but you just don’t know what to do 
until you end up asking for the help of your neighbor - the one and only ghost skeptic - changkyun
he sees you in the elevator on the weekend, bags under your eyes from staying up all night in fear and anticipation
and asks, like a friendly neighbor would, if you’re ok
when you sniffle - explaining that you havent been able to sleep well in weeks because your apartment is literally being run over by ghosts
he lets out a hearty laugh
that makes you both embarrassed and a little annoyed
“hey, im suffering here. i just wish i could get them to go away!”
“well you cant get something to go away if it doesnt exist”
he counters and you cross your arms
the two of you get out on your floor and you motion toward your door
“it does exist, and it’s in my house! you can check for yourself!”
changkyun runs a hand through his hair, seemingly thinking it over
before nodding 
“fine. im sure i can help you find your real problem - whatever causing the noise is not a ghost”
so that’s how you two end up
changkyun making his way through your apartment as you trail behind him
it’s when you two are in the living room that the you both hear the sound
and you instinctively move closer to changkyun out of fear
he notices, but doesnt say anything 
instead he makes a knowing sound and you ask him to explain what that could be 
if not a scary, mean ghost
“have you checked the vents?”
he suddenly asks and you knit your brows
“what are you talking about”
changkyun looks at you with a fact that reads ‘did you not know you have vents in your apartment?’
you stare back, fully aware of how one) he must think you’re a big dummy right now
and two) wow you had never realized he was so,,,,,,,handsome
“vents. well all have them in this building. let’s find yours.”
you proceed following him around
this time a bit closer, even holding the edge of his sleeve when you hear the noise again
changkyun just lets you, peeking over your sofa and behind bookshelves
till finally he finds the vent he’s looking for in the kitchen
leaning down, it takes him one yank to get the bars off of it and then peek his head inside
“ahah - look here. it’s your ghost”
he says and you don’t get it, but join him to see whats inside
to your shock
it’s a nest,,,,,made of newspaper and other old papers
and inside
is a mouse
“it must be living in the vents, moving around and making a noise that echoes in your apartment.”
changkyun explains
getting back up and giving you a triumphant, almost lopsided grin
“told you it wasnt a ghost.”
you cross your hands and puff out our cheeks, trying to think of a way to save face
but changkyun - although you think he’s going to mock you for it - doesnt
instead he offers to help get rid of the mouse 
saying he’ll just release it outside
you watch him as he gets a small jar
the two of you traveling downstairs and into the street outside where changkyun sets the jar down on some grass
the mouse scuttles away
and changkyun turns to go back when you stop him shyly
“i should thank you somehow,,,,do you want me to get you dinner or something?”
changkyun brightens up at the idea of free food
but he also brightens up at the idea of a cute date with you - the neighbor he’s definitely noticed all this time
he agrees
and you end up eating take out back at your place
because quote on quote “changkyun said he’d keep you company and scare away any other ghosts”
really all just another way of him trying to spend more time with you
and it’s fun 
you guys eat and talk and changkyun convinces you to try and watch some scary movies  - even though you kind of dislike them
“well if you ever need another ghost hunting buddy or,,,,,,,,,a horror movie buddy im right across the hall”
he says
and you blush a bit as you pick at your food
“what if i wanted,,,,,,something more like a date buddy?”
you offer and changkyun nearly snaps his neck with how fast he’s nodding
“i can,,,,,,,totally do that too” 
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moonlight-aus · a year ago
back to you
— “calm down! you’re scaring me!” & “you’re trembling.” & “how long has it been since you last slept?” PAIRING: jeong yunho X fem!reader GENRE: angst, fluff TYPE: mention of verbal fight (between couple), sleep deprivation WORD COUNT: 1088 NOTE: im too soft for yunho to write him arguing with someone so dont kill me its angsty enough to see lil yunho puppy sad
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you never had big fights with yunho.
but, maybe this time, the both of you took it too far. he was worn out from his work and you were tired of seeing him in that state. you just worried for him.
when he slammed the door and left you alone, you stood a few moments, hoping he’d come back. you then moved to the sofa, waiting for him to come back home.
but he didn’t come.
you had your phone next to you at all times, volume up in case he called or text. every notification was a false hope. you couldn’t sleep, thinking of his whereabouts and his well-being. did yunho think of you as well?
you knew that he was probably at a friends house or maybe he even went back to his family, and you shouldn’t be worried- yunho is a grown man, he can take care of himself. you knew that too. 
yunho was just as devastated as you were. he sat on his friend’s couch, spilling his heart out to his best friend. when he arrived to mingi’s house, he was shaking and his eyes were red and filled with tears.
“calm down! you’re scaring me!” mingi said when he barged into his house, pacing back and forth, running his hands through his hair.
mingi eventually got yunho to sit down and talk to him. he didn’t know how to help his friend, but he advised yunho to back to you and talk it out.
“i can’t...” yunho sniffled, “she probably hates me now. i just walked out on her, left her alone and i should’ve tried to stay and listen to her...”
"it was a dick move, i agree,” mingi tried to reason with him, finally getting a chuckle from his friend, “but you were overwhelmed, it’s fine. just go back to her. she could never hate you.”
yunho tried to argue, he really felt like shit about what he had done but mingi didn’t give him time.
“please, she’s head over heels with you! she’s such a kind soul, she’s probably blaming herself, not you.” mingi rolled his eyes, “go home and tell her how you feel, she’ll understand.”
and mingi was right, you were blaming yourself. you bit the skin around your nails, thinking that maybe you should’ve been softer with him, maybe you shouldn’t have raised your voice, maybe you shouldn’t have even brought the topic up. but all those maybes are nothings now, you should’ve thought about it before.
yunho looked at his phone, hoping to see any notification from you. instead, he realised he already spent a whole day away from you. he told mingi he was going back home and left his friend’s house, catching a taxi back to your place.
your head snapped towards the door when you heard it unlock and relief washed over you as you saw yunho. after closing the door, he ran to you and held you in his arms. you didn’t realise it at first but you started crying and shaking.
“you’re trembling.” yunho whispered into your hair, “i’m so sorry, (y/n). i’m so so sorry.”
he pulled away, holding your face up, so he could take a better look at you. the dark circles around your eyes indicated you haven’t been sleeping well, or at all, and you looked pale.
“did you eat?” he asked.
you shook your head and his heart broke a little.
“i’m going to cook something for us, then.” he replied, moving a strand of your hair behind your ear. “i’m so sorry for leaving you.”
you tried to speak but nothing came out. yunho was trying not to cry so he looked up and rubbed his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater. he sat you down on the couch again and left to the kitchen. the fact that he disappeared, even if it was in your home, made you want to cry again so you got up and walked to the kitchen.
“i shouldn’t have talked about it. i’m sorry, yunho.” your voice was breaking at every other word. “i was- i’m sorry, i don’t want to bring it up.”
“it’s okay, baby.” he turned around, his eyebrows furrowed. “i was an idiot, i shouldn’t have left you... i was just so exhausted, i didn’t know how to react.”
you wrapped your arms around him, leaning your forehead on his back.
“please, don’t leave me.” you sobbed.
yunho’s body stiffened upon hearing your words, his heart clenched, almost making it hard to breathe.
“i would never do that.”
he turned off the stove, pouring the ramen into two separate bowls. you started eating slowly but hunger consumed you. yunho reached for one of your hands, rubbing his thumb on the back of your hand.
“how long has it been since you last slept?” he asked.
“i can’t sleep when you’re not around...” you felt dumb and dependant of him, “and when you come home late, i can’t sleep either, i’m so worried about you that i stay awake the whole night looking after you.”
yunho felt a bit guilty. he loved his job and he was sure he wasn’t going to quit it now, but he knew he could change some habits. his way of working wasn’t giving him any profit, either. his colleagues had warned him about his tactics, he ignored them but yunho was burnout. 
“i’m going to change,” he said, twirling his chopsticks in the ramen, “it isn’t good for us.”
when you finished eating, yunho took you to the bathroom. he turned the shower on, letting himself go in first before helping you in. the two of you took a hot shower, yunho massaged your head as you were hugging him. you looked up when you finished rinsing your hair and yunho rubbed your cheek before leaning in to give you a sweet kiss.
“i missed you, i’m so sorry.” he whispered, his eyes closed as he let the tip of his nose touch yours.
“it’s okay, yunho.” your fingers danced on his broad back, “i’m sorry too.”
after the shower and putting your pajamas on, the two of you slid into the bed. yunho opened his arms and you let your head fall on his chest as he put his arms over your body. he ran his hand up and down your arm, soothing you. you felt your eyelids getting heavy, something that you’ve been fighting for a while.
“you can sleep now,” yunho mumbled, “i got you.”
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fullsundh · 3 years ago
Boyfriend! Mark (Part 1)
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Part 2 Can Be Found Here
How You Met:
Okay so you two met each other through donghyuck
You n Hyuck were randomly seated next to each other in a class that you both hated
So that obviously lead to you both talking to each other rather than listening to the teacher
After mONTHs of you and hyuck missing out on work due to chatting the entire damn lesson
Y’all realised that you were both completely clueless on most of the topics and exam season was coming up
Y I K E S !
So hyuck decided that it’d be a good idea to invite you over to the dorm so that you could study everything you had missed
And that’s when you met Mark!!
As soon as Mark opened the door to see someone as cute as you stood there
His ass fROZE
I stg he would’ve been stood there staring at you with wide eyes for an hour if hyuck hadn’t have shoved him out of the way to greet you.
Mark would be really sweet yet shy towards you :’))
He’d introduce himself to you with a hUge blush across his cheeks awh
And for the entire night he’d keep coming up with excuses to interrupt you and hyuck just so he talk to you
“Hyuck do you want me to get you and Y/N a drink?”
“Y/N said she’s fine and I’m okay too but thanks for offering mark”
*literally five minutes later*
“You guys want a drink yet or???”
So basically to sum up the entire night that mark met you,,
It was just him constantly asking if you and hyuck needed anything jUST so that he could look at you for longer
And every time he looked at you his cheeks would go a dark pink uwuwuwu
Mark Having A Crush:
Lets all agree that Mark having a crush would be a MESS!
Mark turns shy pretty much every time he’s near you
Every time he spoke to you he’d just crumble completely
He’d be blushing constantly
He’d stumble over his words 90% of the time
He’d also accidentally speak his mind a lOt which lead to an extremely embarrassed mark
“You look beautiful today Y/N”
Wait fuck did I really just say that out loud oh no oh no oh no
Begs Donghyuck to invite you over to the dorms because he’s too shy to do it himself!!!
And every time he hears you ringing the doorbell to be let in he SPRINTS to the door just so he can be the first one to greet you
Chenle already on his way to let you in???
Tough luck bitch Mark would just knock his ass out of the way bc seeing you first is that important to him (he turning nasty for love smh)
Mark overthinks about so many things too
He could unintentionally hug you for a bit too long when he greets you and then suddenly be thinking:
Because you’re Mark’s crush he could literally talk about you for hours on end because that’s how whipped for you he is.
Jisung could just mention your name in a conversation and mark would be like “wOW!! Y/N!! DONt EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THEM!!!!” n then go on a massive rant of how beautiful you looked yesterday or how cute your laugh sounds
he really is the ultimate soft boi
bc he’s so whipped for u he thinks about you pretty much every night before he goes to bed:’)
He would be ready to go to sleep but then suddenly he’ll find himself hugging his pillow and staring up at his ceiling while thinking about you...
Prolly starts giggling to himself too bc he’s imagining some really soft and cute shit that you two would do together when if you started dating.
Overall he’s just a big phat soft n mushy mess for you
I feel like mark would take a while to confess because he’d be too scared of rejection:((
And so that’s why the dreamies do it for him!!
Well I say do it for him
What I mean is,,,
They expose his ass lmao
After months of hearing mark rant about his feelings non-stop they would get pretty fed up with it
And after countless attempts of trying to convince him that you liked him back,
They would just give up and choose to take actions into their own hands
Donghyuck invited you over while Mark was out practicing with some of the other dreamies
Right before the dreamies were about to arrive back to the dorms,,
Jisung texted hyuck to let him know that they were almost home.
And that’s when hyuck tells you that he wants to prank and scare the boys
So you agree to hide behind the sofa with hyuck and wait for mark and the others to arrive...
When Mark finally arrives back at the dorm Jisung gets him to sit on the sofa that you and hyuck are hiding behind (IDK IF ANY OF THIS SHIT IS MAKIN SENSE)
As planned, Jisung says “so have you spoken to y/n recently?”
“They’re so beautiful my heart can’t take it anymore I just wanna confess how I feel and take them out on dates. I wanna love them with all my heart, look after them and let them know just how much they really mean to me...”
And you heard the WHOLE thing.
You just awkwardly come out of hiding with hyuck stood next to you trying to keep his laughter in what an ass
And then shock turned into panic
Because like I said, he was scared of getting rejected:((
He starts apologising over and over in such a rushed voice because he’s scared that he’s made you uncomfortable and he doesn’t want to loose you as his friend poor bby
So to shut him up you just wrap your arms around him n give him a big hug:)))
Mark turns back into a shy bby but hugs you back n rests his chin on your head because he’s finally able to be as affectionate as he’s always wanted to be towards you
wow I love the superior couple
You tell him how you feel the same way and awh he gives you the biggest and brightest smile ever it’s SOCUTE
He’s the type of person that would pick you up and spin you around out of pure joy :)
It’s the start of a very adorable relationship
Here’s part two
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