#like i get it from a business standpoint but holy shit

[hexabeast]

Hey Tumblr, from a UI Designer:

This update sucks nuts and not because it's new or different, but because it's too busy. It's too noisy and cluttered and HOLY SHIT WHAT DO I FOCUS ON

THIS? Hot garbage. It's NOISE. There's too much happening. What the fuck am i supposed to focus on here? Not only that, but the information doesn't even fit on the page entirely. You talked about wanting to get more 'new' or 'unknown' posts in front of people and yet the radar is hidden and the 'check out these' section just reads as more noise, Don't even get me started on how the Tumblr Live feed just looks like if I click on it i will get nothing but viruses.

So. Let's do some tweaking.

Still cluttered, but less terrifying! This is 15 minutes shuffling things around. Give me a full day and I could do more but this is just to get the idea across,

You got too many visual elements going on rn and it's Too Much. And a lot of it users just CAN'T get rid of. So. Let them. A collapseable sidebar of Discover will let them choose whether they want to engage with it or not, while still keeping the site balanced visually.

Condensing the Stupid live feed into a section along with your following tags and the for you tab keeps it all together, again so people who want to engage in that media CAN,

Like i really cannot stress how terrible this update is from a clutter standpoint. Please. Less is more. I get you wanna be twitter, you want to be friendly to the folks who use twitter, but do you even know what parts of twitter they engaged with??

I'm begging y'all to do better. Please.

#ui design #tumblr update #clutter is bad #you can make it work #but god #anyway i was a ui designer for 3 years #i am by no means an EXPERT #but kneejerk reaction this is what i did in 15 minutes #and i'd love if someone with MORE experience made it even better #anyway that's all #my hand is still injured #and this took like 30 minutes to type

[brianvan]

The year-end personal recap concept is OPPRESSIVE to me. I think it's healthy to occasionally check-in with yourself every once in a while but... why do I have to participate in a public ceremony? Why NOW, the one week of the year I'm the most sleepy and listless from all the parties and the holiday food and the laying-around? When nothing is going on NOW to brag about, and it's the longest distance in time from lots of things I do productively? And why do most people have lots of big changes to brag about and I'm usually fishing for stuff to brag about out of my totally-fine life because none of it is status-seeking or photogenic? Just for theoretical purposes, does the angst get any easier if you have a year that makes for an easy and beautiful year end post? Probably not.

Anyway.

2022 didn't feel special while I was living it - it felt like a year where nothing major happened, where there was just a lot of work/planning to do and it was not worth bragging about.

But, uh, holy shit:

Celebrated 10 years of marriage!

I basically started a new career (but, caveat, the position started in November 2021 - yet by New Year's, after something like 5 total weeks of real work, I had no real idea if it would take root. But root it did)

Relating to the second-longest thing going in my life (other than the marriage), my service on the Community Board, a pretty seismic change - I resigned my position as Treasurer (a real piece-of-cake assignment that lets me nose in on the whole board's business) so that I could take the role of Transportation Committee chair, which is a huge upgrade in visibility, control and direct involvement in the issues I've been taking up for years.

Moved into a much nicer apartment, one that isn't a nexus of maintenance crises. More room! All new furniture! A much nicer shower/bathtub!

We have a financial advisor now!

Not only did I have a good biking year...

...and a pretty damn good camping year...

But I bike-camped across THE WHOLE STATE OF IOWA, 462 miles in seven days. First time traveling with the bike!

I went to 10-12 concerts, which is about 9-10 more than I go to in any given year, and they all were at least pretty good!

I went to something like 12 baseball games because I dove in with a CitiField ticket package, and I think it worked out pretty good! (Plus a Yankees game and a Rangers game)

A scenic trip to the Finger Lakes!

Got to do Delaware River rafting again!

I finally read THE POWER BROKER!

I managed to get a short trip to San Francisco, my second time!

Legal weed!

New Peloton bike at home! I'm actually using it!

... and couple other things I'm not going to divulge or air out here!

Anyway, I was very surprised to take a glance at some records and see all of these very big (often long-delayed) things happened all in a short time. Yes, there were *absolutely bad* things that happened too, but the trend seems to be "change and growth" in big ways at once, rather than just ordinary things passing in time and space.

But, the year felt like A LOT. Another theme through most of the year was "don't overcommit yourself!" and that's easier-said-than-done sometimes (especially in a year where seasonal/annual things that were paused for 1-2 years came roaring back all at once). And also "stop wasting time on various maladaptive habits!" (which is less "using social media" and more "reflexively checking social media as much as one blinks") So, from an attention/stimulation standpoint I've really been flying by the seat of my pants and I'm certainly not going to try to ever plan to one-up a year like this one. I am hoping for a relatively calm 2023, already committing to several attention cutbacks.

Every once in a while I get posed the question "where do you see yourself in 5 years" and at one point I thought I could get insight on that by looking at the past 10 years. And from that I saw that the answer was "there is absolutely no telling where you will be in 5 years or what you want to see happen, all you know is that you'll have significantly pulled yourself forward and you won't be where you are now." Because in any 5 year timeframe, that has been the story of the last 20+ years. Recently, I've learned and experienced so much, and have grown so much. And there is so much more opportunity for learning and growth. Life is an experience of taking those opportunities continually. And it's great.

Ironically, the idea of personal growth/progress is a concern where I'm deeply anxious, and fearful of failure. I am going to spend some time unpacking that in 2023. (That's been part of the growth, BTW: insight into bad thinking!) What ties all of this together is that it's a fairly good idea to gut-check that anxiety by looking at an actual recap of events and achievements. Enough happened this year that I should forgive myself if I want to chill out for the next 2 years! If I just did many of the events from this past year all over again in this coming year (like a routine), it'll be fantastic! If there's anything I'm unhappy with now, or anything I'm worried where I don't control whether it goes good or bad... there's literally nothing to worry about because even among setbacks I come out very strongly ahead overall, even in a bad year! (Other than "you shouldn't worry" as a separate but still meaningful lesson)

It is very difficult to remember all of this so I figure it's good for me to jot this down in private. As it turns out, I've got many years of recaps in Tumblr already that are public, so here's another one for the pile. I'm keeping the streak going. Now I don't need to worry about being the guy without a rosy year-end recap.

[simptasia]

the economy over here has been fucked lately, everything is way more expensive. like, fuck, i wanna take better care of my body, i wanna eat a bagillion cucumbers like i used to but they ain’t making it easy

#3 dollars and 50 cents per cucumber?? get fucked. 14 dollars per kilo for capsicums? thats fucking evil bro i hate you #also mum and i are so fucking lucky we got our house before corona happened because houses are like at least 100 thou more expensive now #like i get it from a business standpoint but holy shit #also because all the food is more expensive less people are buying it #so a ton of fruit and veggies are just. going straight up squishy in the stores #at this point the only thing you can rely on is apples and carrots. carrots are crazy cheap so theres that #but i can only eat two of those a day bruh cuz too many carrots overloads ur liver and makes ya skin turn yellow #sigh im just venting #also the junk food is cheaper than healthy food. but the prices on that stuff is still going up #my dollar noodles are 2 dollars now. straight up 50% mark up. it's still a good deal tho #and like sometimes the shops go months without putting the doritos on special #im not saying i NEED doritos but im just pointing out the sad state of affairs thats going on in the supermarkets #s'all steadily rising in price. and yeah that happens over time anyways but its getting quicker now cuz of the virus #fuck's sake bruh i want cucumbers on a regular basis again. at this point i'd take 'em for 2 dollars each. which is sad

[jiminrings]

what if....just WHaT iF senior y/n started to prepare lunch boxes again?? and shy stem koo is all giddy and happy to see them placed on his desk (gahhh idk if that’s a good idea or if it makes sense at all) as always, thank u so much for writing for us!!

omg ok... can we see when y/n starts to leave “his” lunchboxes again??? 😄

cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D

stem koo loses in a competition but he wins at the end of the day (kind of)

the universe is out to get jungkook

there's a hit list and he is the only person that comprises the entirety of it

the world is his oyster and it offers him nothing but Ls

he has a guardian angel but the only thing it guarantees is his downfall!!!!

“in 5th place, we have jeon jungkook!”

holy fUCK does he hate any ordinal rank that isn’t the first when it’s next to his name

god his face is being shown in the digital monitor and his eyes are quivering behind his glasses

maybe it’s just him but perhaps everyone in the auditorium could see how fRUSTRATED he is

his pupils keep dancing and he has a curt smile on and it���s physically a pain for him to go up the stage and claim his flimsy little piece of paper

jungkook clearly did not expect to go up on stage this early in time and certainly did not expect to be in fifth place ://

second is beyond embarrassing, third’s actually not that bad, fourth is an odd rank and always unnoticed, but fifth however is just plain-out gAG

the rank makes him shudder as if getting a consolation 2nd rank isn’t bad enough and they STILL decided to have the awards go up to fifth place

“in 4th place, park jimin– come right up!”

://

... naur

hold on a second

there is nO fucking way

don’t get him wrong!!! jimin is one of his closest friends but holy fuck this has gOT to be a punch in gut for jungkook

if he has to be very critical in an academic standpoint,,,

as in annoyingly critical

jimin’s more of a so-so alright :// he just randomly decided to shift to stem because he was getting bored of business!!! IT WAS NEVER HIS FIRST OPTION

he isn’t in much stem clubs like jungkook, doesn’t study as much as he does, always rests and goes out on weekends and takes breaks in between studying, not spending every moment trying to improve himself unlike him.....

u-uh which is normal

bUT JUNGKOOK FEELS LIKE JIMIN ISN’T ON HIS LEVEL

AND NEITHER SHOULD HE BE HIGHER

god does that sound problematic

the fact that jimin is surprised too helps ease the guilt that kook experiences tho

“really? shit, i just guessed half of the answers to the questionnaire LMAOOOOOOO”

...

.....

that’s it.

the world is out to get jungkook

he doesn’t necessarily take his anger out on people because he represses it all but he’s noticeably dull the whole day

and the day after that of course because he pours effort into everything!! and that includes sulking

“you’re worrying about that brat again,” yoongi says through his chewing, savoring every bit of the fish and chips you’ve made him, “the same brat who looked like he was gonna deck me, his senior, on the spot for eating from his lunchbox — which i’m also doing now!!”

he still isn’t over it alright

tbh yoongi kinda admires the kid because he’s smart and all that

and you also like him and he can kinda see why

BUT NOOOOO HE JUST HAD TO DO THAT ://

“i don’t care for him,” you scoff through the same chips you made yourself, wiping the residual oil on yoongi’s denim pants, “i’m just curious.”

“you don’t know?”

sheesh when did yoongi DO all the knowing

“he lost in this stem competition; something like that. anyways, it was our school’s turn to host it and he was one of our two representatives and yeah.... he’s fifth place.”

“he is????”

yoongi nods at your barely-concealed shock, “jimin ranked fourth.”

didn’t you just do a drinking tequila until you have a completely normal resting face competition last nIGHT?!???

:O

you feel sorry for jungkook :((

so much sorry and awed at the same time that you’d sell a lung to see him break into a smile from a corny ifunny.co science joke atleast once

“i have two rest periods in a row, right?” you ask yoongs while you try to gather your things to put them back in your backpack as calmly as possible, eyes not breaking character

“why do you assume that i’d know your schedule?” he grimaces at the concept of being thoughtful to his closest friend, “you have three rest periods in a row.”

“good. i’m just gonna get something back from the dorm.”

that something just had to be a fresh batch of newly-made fish and chips, tucked neatly into his electric lunchbox

jungkook’s about to call it a day because the three-hour lecture he used to find engaging is strenous, about to exit the room with his shoulders sagged when-

isn’t that his lunchbox?

it’s laid on the mini desk next to the exit, the all-too-familiar sticky note with the doodle and his name being stuck on — something he’s dearly missed

you did a good job, jungkook :)

jungkook feels dizzy to hold the lunchbox back in his hands, opening up to see if it tRULY is the deal and it’s with giddiness that he finds that his meal’s still warm

yeah

it’s okay

it’s more than okay

jungkook won this time :)

#SEND REQUESTS PLS the next part is where shit goes down and the other request i have is something v cute :D #PLS I NEED THE IN-BETWEENS!!!! GO CRAZY BESTIES #stem koo #jungkook imagine #jungkook imagines #jungkook oneshot #jungkook oneshots #jungkook drabbles #jungkook x reader

[veliseraptor]

Okay I'm new to this fandom and I'm a bit confused. Did Xue Yang and Meng Yao know each other? Did Meng Yao free him?👀Do xue yang know he has a parentage that dabbled in demonic cultivation?

congratulations, anon! you have hit the nail on the head of one of my perennial aggravations about cql-canon specific details, which is to say ‘what the hell is the deal supposed to be with meng yao and xue yang in qinghe?’

there is no real indication that they might have known each other except some meaningful side-eyes going on that don’t make a lot of sense in context other than, maybe, pre-flagging the idea that meng yao is ~problematic~ and ~untrustworthy~ I guess? (which, ask me how I feel about the idea that everything jin guangyao does forever is bad and sinister, regardless of timeline, effect, or motivation). but there’s no real, substantive indication (up until the empathy flashback in ep 41, I’ll get there) that they are familiar with each other, or that they actually do any collaborating at that point.

you could definitely headcanon them as knowing each other previously based on the fact that they both grew up in less than ideal circumstances, shall we say, but I don’t think there’s any evidence for it in-text other than aforementioned meaningful side-eyes. in fact, canonically we know where they both grew up locationwise and it wasn’t in the same place. but like, seriously.

(and holy shit this got long, I’ll spare you all with a read more. also: I have broken my usual ‘referring to jin guangyao as jin guangyao always’ rule for the sake of this post given that it is specifically about the era where he is going by meng yao, but it did feel really weird.)

speaking specifically with what we see in text (in episode 10), we see meng yao argue against executing xue yang, but only after wei wuxian has done so first. the next explicit link between them is when meng yao leaves the fight between wen zhuliu and nie mingjue saying that he’s going to go check on xue yang; following that, we’re told that xue yang has escaped and meng yao claims he saw the captain free him.

which is, considering the fact that he’s killing the captain at the time, a highly suspect statement to make.

there’s no reason for meng yao to be working with xue yang at this point! there’s just not! it doesn’t make sense for him even from a purely self-interested standpoint and, again, at this point in canon there’s no actual reason to believe that they have any prior familiarity.

(’but lise what about the flashback-’ yes I’ll get there.)

if you want my personal reading, which I think is compatible with the text as we see it, it goes like this:

1. xue yang quickly notices meng yao as a potentially interesting person. I don’t think it’s about seeing him as an ally or knowing him from anything beforehand - I think it’s about seeing him as interesting and kind of funny.

2. meng yao registers that there’s a distinct possibility of nie mingjue dying and/or the wen sect attacking the nie in force and decides to short-circuit that by just freeing xue yang himself, because he knows nie mingjue won’t do it but if xue yang’s gone then that (at least temporarily) solves their wen problem.

my evidence for this is based around the timing of when meng yao leaves to “check on” xue yang (mid-fight, specifically after wen zhuliu, inarguably a greater threat, takes over from wen chao), the fact that he looks definitely concerned when he does so, and the fact that, given where he is at this point, letting xue yang out otherwise makes no sense.

this does not strike me as the face of a person who is a-plottin some sinister business, and this isn’t a face he’s making at anyone, either; this is pure ‘ah fuck this ain’t good’ expression.

(yes, yes, I know, episode 41 flashback, I told you that we’d get there.)

3. meng yao frees xue yang, probably hoping he can make it as bloodless as possible; xue yang, in xue yang fashion, makes it as bloody as possible; meng yao sees his chance to do something about the guy he has always hated and who has repeatedly undermined him, and who probably also caught him in the middle of an incriminating action that nie mingjue would absolutely not accept as justifiable.

4. xue yang bounces, leaving jin guangyao caught holding the sword and surrounded by several dead bodies.

and then they don’t see each other again until xue yang ends up at jinlintai at some unspecified point down the timeline.

regarding the episode 41 flashback (see? I promised!), the view we get of meng yao talking with an unspecified person heavily implied to be xue yang doesn’t make sense in some very critical ways that also align with the selective editing that nie mingjue’s memories seem to have done on incidents we previously saw from a (presumably) omniscient perspective. many people other than me (see here, here, and here for some examples) have written eloquently about the disparities between the scenes as we see them in earlier episodes compared to what we see in the flashback, and how that suggests at least some unreliability of nie mingjue’s memories despite their presentation, since they are visually coeval with the rest of canon, as equally reliable. 

(what would be different if the empathy flashbacks were in some way visually demarcated, I wonder? it’s a thought. I like that they’re not because unreliability of narrative/narrator is such a theme, but.)

ANYWAY, regarding the section where we see that conversation between the captain and meng yao, now with bonus mysterious feet (implied to be xue yang) - a few things stand out to me.

one: nie mingjue has no way of having seen this - no personal access to what he’s supposedly seeing in his own memory. this suggests the possibility, at least, that this is a fabricated assumption of a memory. (”I believe this happened, and this is how I would reconstruct it happening.”)

two: possibly more significantly: the scene as played here doesn’t fit with canon as we see it in episode 10 itself. the scene with the captain and meng yao, as we see it earlier, includes here several additional lines of dialogue. considering the other discrepancies within the empathy flashback with previously seen canon, episode ten’s version, by virtue of not taking place within a (flashback of a) flashback and within the pov of an extremely biased character, could be read as more reliable.

see also: the flashback with the captain seeing meng yao talking to someone (implied to be xue yang) is placed directly after nie mingjue accuses meng yao of plotting with xue yang - an accusation he doesn’t make in the scene as it originally plays in episode 10. this is another place where there are several lines of dialogue that weren’t present in the earlier version of the scene, inserted apparently seamlessly into the record.

taken together, with the above where it does not make sense to me that meng yao was ~plotting~ with xue yang prior to freeing him as a way of getting the wens off nie mingjue’s back, I’m inclined to think that moment in the episode 41 flashback is a nie mingjue-generated presumption of what must have happened, rather than a factual account of what did.

meng yao’s choices in episode 10 make much more sense - as someone who, if nothing else, is definitely interested in preserving his position as part of the nie sect, but who also values nie mingjue’s life at that point enough to take a sword to the chest for him - if you don’t take that at face value.

regarding the second part of your question about the xue yang/xue chonghai connection - cql seems to indicate that he has some awareness maybe, based on his conversation with wei wuxian in episode 37? at least, he has access to Lore involving the yin iron that others were unaware of

and had one piece in his possession apparently pre-canon.

but honestly that’s a bit of cql canon that I pretty much ignore completely and sometimes forget about, though there are certainly interesting things that can be done with it.

#anonymous #conversating #lise does meta #the sad queer cultivators show #xue yang #jin guangyao #sorry this took so long anon but perhaps seeing the above you can understand why

[willowwhispersspeakeasy]

Honestly i learn something new everyday with this fandom holy shit🙃

Your takes are so big brained i just eudbfwbs but yes the idea of having the purple blood and the horizontal pupils is so perfect to me cuz if you're gonna make a hybrid type character why the hell won't you take advantage of it and make them more unique?? From a marketing standpoint i get it but it is a wasted opportunity in my eyes

Also omg i haven't written on this blog for years but I'm glad you like the stuff 👉👈 nowadays i write on @jd-loves-fiction and maybe am thinking of writing for TWST when i finish requests who knows :)

omg you have the robins d a m n that takes me back

personally I adore inhuman characters (like the merfolk, beastmen, I haven't written much here involving the fae but I do have many ideas) I just think they are so much fun. human characters are great but taking an animal influenced character just leave so much more room to experiment.

I do think Azul wants to be seen as human by other humans, as they are more likely to trust him. its really just good business in his mind. but its so much, creepier, to imagine him "breaking character" and showing that he is in fact, a creature of the deep sea.

#omen speaks

[khtrinityftw]

Holy shit, Doug! ANOTHER perfect review! From such a newbie to KH and serious gaming in general, that is legitimately impressive!

1.) It’s improved from the first KH in almost every way - I think objectively the story/writing and general atmosphere is downgraded, although that’s not to say either are bad here; far from it! (There were also a few gameplay downgrades in the original version, but Doug - like most people these days - played Final Mix so it’s not an issue.)

2.) A reasonable view on the prologue - yes, the pacing is too slow for its own good and it does a tad too well at intentionally confounding players, but yes, if you allow yourself to become engaged with the story that it’s telling it’s very effective and emotional, to the point where getting the game going and leaving Twilight Town and Hayner/Pence/Olette behind will be as much a sad event as it is an exciting one. Also, simulation Roxas > real Roxas.

3.) No disagreements on the combat. It’s fucking spectacular.

4.) The writing in the finale in the World That Never Was in general is on a whole other level. While the beginning of the game kept a little too much mysterious while the middle was awkward in its sudden exposition dumps, the end nails it with how it brings clarity to everything. Giving so much of the exposition to Ansem the Wise, voiced by Christopher Lee, was in particular a brilliant move, since it’s Christopher fucking Lee and he sells it like nobody’s business.

5.) I’ve brought this up before, but the shoehorned-in feel of Maleficent and Pete in the finale is because originally they weren’t supposed to be there. In the early draft of the plot, Maleficent wasn’t supposed to be resurrected and Pete would have made his last exit in the Hollow Bastion war sequence once his Heartless army was decimated. Once the decision was made to include Maleficent, there weren’t that many places in the plot she could be fit in without disrupting it too much. For what they had to work with, I feel they did a solid job; better than what the series beyond does anyway.

6.) “I get people who say there’s way too much going on, it doesn’t make sense, they retconned some stuff, some characters are a little bland...but if you’re someone like me, these are tropes you kinda look forward to; we know they’re a little silly but that’s part of the fun”. And once again I say.... YES! SO MUCH YES!!! KH2 is like an early 2000s anime and that’s part of why, while a downgrade from its predecessor from a writing standpoint, it’s so muck fucking fun. Even the stupid stuff tends to be enjoyable and yes, sometimes intentional (for his faults, Kazushige Nojima has a great sense of humor).

7.) The only time revisiting a world completely failed for me was Agrabah. I feel it’s the weakest mandatory world in the game and a step down from its KH design, and the area they added in the revisit was just...not fun. Otherwise, KH2′s two visits per world format was a really solid one that I wish the series beyond had stuck with.

8.) I would not say the likes of Sora, Kairi and Riku were given more personality here since a lot of their personalities were made more basic, the roles they play are still effective by the end, and the other characters whom Nojima either wrote without anyone else having written for them before or whom he’d supervised in Chain of Memories were great. Special attention needs to be given to Xemnas (or rather, Xehanort) and Ansem the Wise. They were never written better than they were here; Nojima had a clear passion for them.

9.) The Roxas battle is famous because the vanilla edition didn’t have it, to the game’s detriment since the whole sequence felt unnecessary without it. I will say that Doug made it harder than it needed to be since he didn’t grasp how to do special attacks like Sonic Rave while in Limit Form, but it is still appropriately difficult; as though Roxas is testing Sora to see it he has what it takes to get farther than he did and lay siege upon Xemnas’ castle. Add to this a kick-ass battle music and it’s little wonder it’s become so legendary.

10.) Wow, that X-Men comics comparison is the perfect one to make. The X-Men comics in the 80s and 90s famously became too convoluted and ultimately suffered from the Chris Carter Effect (or in this case, Chris Claremont Effect), which is perfectly reasonable. However, before that point was reached, they were still beloved and successful despite these faults because Claremont still had his priorities straight: he ensured that readers enjoyed the stories and characters, and that emotional engagement and exciting spectacle was appropriately balanced. KH2 is the KH series at that exact kind of high point: the flaws are there, but they haven’t overtaken everything and they’re even something of a charm point since they’re paired together with a story and characters that you care about. Had the series beyond been able to maintain this exact level of quality, we’d all be the better for it. But even so, KH2 remains a triumph of action-RPG video games I love to return to again and again. As far as I’m concerned, nothing that comes after it really matters, for KH2 is already the ideal finale for Kingdom Hearts and always will be.

#Kingdom Hearts II

[concussed-to-pieces]

Whether It Works Out Or Not Part Three

Fandom: Red Dead Redemption 2

Pairing: Arthur Morgan/Named OFC

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN: Welcome kids, welcome to the conclusion! I hope you've liked this little foray into the Wild West. Enjoy!

[Spoiler warning for the first three chapters of the game!]

Tag List: @huliabitch​ @cookiethewriter​ @pedrosbigdorkenergy​ @thirstworldproblemss​ @anonymouscosmos​ @culturalrebel​ @karmezii​ @teaofpeach​ @crookedmoonsaultpunk​ @wrestlingfae​ @zombiexbody​ @nelba​ @gabrielle1776​ @toxiicpop​ @mstgsmy​ @misty-possum​

Part One: Strangers

Part Two: Friends

[!TRIGGER WARNING!: This installment contains unprotected sex, historical inaccuracies and allusions to previous abuse. Stay safe!]

If he had so glibly dubbed Linton perishing of pneumonia as bad business, he dreaded to come up with a term for whatever Irene had gone through. Christ, spousal discipline. A victim of the so-called 'gentlemen' that brought their wives to heel with the rod, coverture at its goddamn finest. It had always made Arthur's chest tight, made him see red, had him raring to give them a taste of their own medicine despite Dutch's constant preaching about an eye for an eye only makes the world blind.

Womenfolk, for all Arthur's troubles with one in particular, deserved to be seen and heard as much as anyone else. Shit, from a biblical standpoint they were supposed to be cherished, protected, defended if they needed it. Arthur was not a pious man by any stretch; the blood on his hands had him thoroughly convinced of his prime spot in Hell come Judgement Day. But if he needed to resort to thumping the good book to get his point across, he damn well would. Fine gentlemen may not fear overmuch the wrath of one Arthur Morgan, yet they certainly feared for the salvation of their wretched, mealy little souls.

Irene's brown eyes were dark and surprisingly dry as she watched him watch her, the tales she told painting the late Mr. Carson as no man, but a fiend in man's clothing. 

Arthur felt a lump form in his throat when she spoke of selling off her damn hair just so she could get free of that bastard. It was clear that after what she had suffered, nearly dying on the side of a mountain was a veritable paradise. She'd had to learn everything the hard way, taking all that she had read about and painstakingly putting it into practice. That she was still alive was a goddamn miracle. A miracle that Arthur didn't feel like testing the charity of. Providence had kept her safe thus far, but just how damn long did she expect that to hold? 

What if someone else had found her in that trap? What if he hadn't been hunting that bear? Hell, what if one of those boys from Lemoyne had come across her bathing today? Arthur gritted his teeth. Granted, she wasn't defenseless, not by a long shot, but lone wolves didn't tend to last out in the wilds. It had been sheer coincidence that nothing far worse had happened.

"Come back to camp with me." He interrupted her to offer, his voice rough. "I...me an' the gang, we can keep you safe there. You ain't gotta' live like this anymore, that feller's dead. He can't come to drag you back to that...misery."

She shook her head, her smile sad. "I've been on my own for too long, Arthur. I'm used to it."

"Please." He begged. "I don't...if...look, I...I don't want you to…" he trailed off, frustrated by his inability to articulate the confusing emotions roiling in his chest. "Hell, I dunno'." He muttered, shoving the toe of his boot into the dirt. "Scared for you, I guess."

"I've made it this far, haven't I?"

"What if it wasn't me?" He retorted. "What if every time, it was-"

"It was you, though." Irene interjected softly. "I won't deny that our paths crossing again and again seems like fate, or divine intervention."

Arthur huffed out a breath. "I s'pose, but-"

"You needed someone to listen, and I needed someone to show me kindness."

"Well sure, but-"

"If you had bedded me in Valentine, would that have satisfied your curiosity?" Irene inquired primly. "Nipped your fascination in the bud?"

"Shit, no." Arthur finally managed to get a word in edgewise, shaking his head. "I...you seemed real sweet. Pretty. Sad, in a secret way. I wanted...but then you said all those things and I...I ain't never met a woman that seemed to see me like how you did, Miss Irene. Most folks just see what they can get outta' me."

"I always saw you, Arthur. From the first time we met on the side of that mountain." Irene told him, her voice gone soft once more. "I saw your smile, and your beautiful eyes, and the way you were willing to help. It made me want to help you too."

"M-My--? Shucks, ma'am, I ain't...I mean my eyes is...uh." Arthur yanked at the collar of his shirt. Despite it being unbuttoned, he suddenly felt as though it was too tight. "Well, you're one to talk about beautiful eyes!" He blustered, feeling his gut twist when she looked surprised of all things. "What, ain't anyone ever said somethin' nice to you before? You got nice eyes! And a good heart! Smart words, too, you're intelligent! Shit--I mean, shoot, sorry, ain't tryin' to swear in front of you." He rushed to apologize, worrying at the brim of his hat. "I'm just off-balance is all, ma'am, forgive me."

She waved off his apology, laughing. "Don't be so uptight, Arthur! It's still me."

"But it ain't, that's the thing. I…" he paused yet again, fumbling in his satchel for his journal. "I-I haven't stopped thinkin' of you, Miss Irene. What I'd say if I ever ran into you again." Opening the book to the first sketch of her, he turned it around so she could see. "I never came up with anythin', though. Aside from 'thank you'."

Instead of staying where she was, she approached and sat down alongside him. Those fingers, just as reverential as the first time 'Frank' had seen his sketches, ran down the lines of her face on the page.

They weren't perfect. His memory of her had been blurry with drink and many of his sketches had been scribbled out or erased into gray smudges in frustration. "They're beautiful." She whispered.

"No, you're beautiful." Arthur murmured before he could think better of it. "Nothin' that I could make would ever do you justice, Miss Irene."

She was flushed already from the fire, her hair slowly drying into a wild mess of sun-streaked curls that he longed to run his fingers through. "I wouldn't say that." She tried to deflect his words, smiling shyly down at her hands.

She had been married. Her acting like what he was doing was something new had Arthur damn near distressed. He cupped her chin with his hand, keeping his touch as light as he could bear while he tipped her face up to look at him. "I would."

"You would?" Her tongue darted out to soothe her dry lips, stirring a half-forgotten memory in his mind of her making some sound into his mouth as he kissed her. 

"I sure would." He drawled, tilting his head and lowering his mouth to hers. The little whimper that came out of her settled in his abdomen. Was this a bad idea? Probably. "Take the shirt off."

"You told me to put it on!" 

"And now, I'm askin' you to take it off." Arthur growled, pressing his mouth against the shell of her ear and breathing, "please."

Irene shivered all over, clinging to his hands like she was trying to keep her composure. Lord knew Arthur's own composure had never been particularly ironclad. She finally released him, her fingers trembling when she reached for the hem of the shirt.

"Easy girl, only if you want to." Arthur pressed a kiss to her cheek, "only if you're willin'. I ain't so brash to believe that you bein' alright with this one time before means that you'd be okay with it now."

"You…" Irene hesitated. "I've never been allowed to say no, Arthur."

Oh, Jesus, that hurt. "Well now you can. Any time. Right now, in the middle, whenever." He forced the words out past his muted, secondhand horror. "I'll stop. I'm not...this ain't about somebody gettin' hurt, okay? This is...I'm tryin' to make you feel good. That's all I want."

Irene squinted up at him, her disbelief evident. "So...it can be good? That's not just something they put in the books so women don't decide to never get bedded?"

Oh Jesus. "Oh, Jesus." Arthur scrubbed helplessly over his stubble with one hand, trying to formulate a response that wouldn't come off as terrifying or lecherous. "So, you...b-but you was married." He floundered. 

"Yes?" 

"He ain't...I mean you never-?"

"I have never been kissed like you kissed me before, if that answers your question."

"Well, yes and no. I-I reckon yes." Arthur stammered. "Alright, let me...I'll pitch my tent and we'll have a lie down and I'll...I-I guess I'll do my damnedest."

Jesus, he needed a minute. Just a momentary reprieve while he fumbled to unlash the canvas from Chase's back. Christ, his mind was going like Hell's wheels. She had never known pleasure from lying with a man. Never. To the point where she thought it was fabricated. One more nail in that devil's coffin, he supposed. Lord, Arthur prayed he was up for this. 

She wanted to help him set up the tent and Arthur had to laugh, his nerves easing a bit at the petulant way she demanded to hold the guylines taut for him. "It's ungentlemanly for me to expect you to help out with stuff like this," he tried to explain.

"If you start pulling some nonsense about how I'm a delicate flower, you will regret it." Irene informed him firmly. "I haven't gotten this far to be treated like glass, Mister Arthur."

"Well, you certainly wasn't protestin' that treatment in Valentine." He chuckled, watching her face go bright red.

"I-I was caught off-guard, that's all! Fell back into old habits!" 

"Oh shoah." He shrugged, still grinning. Thunder rumbled in the distance and he quickly opened up the tent flap with a broad, sweeping bow. "After you, ma'am."

She smiled at him and Arthur was hard-pressed to think of a prettier sight than that, the woman sidling past him to enter the tent after she had gathered up her still-damp things. 

Arthur Morgan did not consider himself a good man. He did not consider himself a particularly smart man either. But every once in a while even his life could pan out with gratifying and interesting results. Such as an attractive woman who had been masquerading as an attractive man ending up in his tent, waiting on him to show her the...primitive ecstasies of the flesh. 

He took his time before joining her however, choosing instead to smoke a cigarette and scan the perimeter of the grove, an idle hand on his revolver. 

He definitely wasn't stalling. Definitely wasn't trying to compose himself before he got out of pocket with her. But Jesus, what he would love to do if she was willing! 

The sunlight began to wane as the clouds rolled in and Arthur stubbed out his cigarette, carefully saving the remainder for later. No telling when he'd get his hands on a fresh pack, and the last chew he'd indulged in had been so strong it nearly burned a hole in his lower lip. Better to stick to the sticks.

He entered the tent to find Irene sitting cross-legged on her bedroll, still in his shirt (and Lord, that was a whole other article that he needed to address about himself), and she looked up at him expectantly as he ducked his head so he didn't bump the side of the tent. "Was just makin' sure everythin' is safe, Miss Irene." He explained, tying the tent flaps together. Arthur then began the process of unbuckling his holster belt, carefully hanging it from the support by the door. He had only stayed alive this long because Hosea had taught him to always have a revolver within reach. "You nervous?" He asked conversationally while he dropped his hat by the door.

"Perhaps a bit." Irene replied, her truthful words giving him pause. "I am optimistic, however."

"I ain't gonna' hurt you, but you need to be honest with me, okay? Won't hurt my feelin's none if you tell me you don't like somethin'." Arthur assured her, "I can adapt."

"Thank you, Arthur."

Oh Jesus, there it was again. Like a hot brick in his stomach, an intoxicating combination of wariness and arousal. He knelt beside her, tangling his fingers greedily through her short, thick curls. He could feel her trembling slightly, which was...sobering. "Ain't gonna' hurt you." He soothed, making a shushing noise. "Ain't gonna' hurt you. You're okay."

Wide brown eyes stared up at him and Irene nodded slowly.

"You trust me, Miss Irene?" Arthur asked quietly. 

Another nod.

"Good." Arthur cupped her face and crushed their mouths together without further ceremony. She gasped into his mouth, her hands finding purchase on his chest where she proceeded to cling to him. He only vaguely remembered how she had reacted to his kiss before, her body threatening to collapse against his own in that cramped little garret that the Saints Hotel considered a rentable room. 

"Arthur," she breathed shakily, kissing him at an almost fevered speed. "Is this really how it's supposed to be?" 

"Is it good?"

"Oh yes, so good, I-"

"That's the important part sorted, then. Rest'll take care of itself." Arthur nibbled on her lower lip, his teeth gentle in case she needed to pull away. If anything though, she pressed closer. He was pleasantly surprised when she timidly slipped him her tongue, illustrating his enthusiastic approval by welcoming it with his own. "Can I touch you?" He gasped against her lips, his forehead resting on her own. They were fully in each other's space now, but he knew that could change in an instant. 

"Please, please." Irene begged, clutching his hands.

"Can I take off the shirt? Can I see you?" was his next question, loaded as it was. 

"I…" Irene paused. "I don't know if...you'd want to, honestly."

"Oh believe me, I want." Arthur insisted. "If you want, I want." 

"Just like that?"

"Don't need to be any more complicated than that, ma'am." Arthur kept his hands still. "Just a little heavy pettin' even, if that's all you're lookin' for. But I can make you feel real good."

"Heavy petting?" Her brow furrowed. "I'm...unfamiliar, Mister Arthur."

"Yeah, y'know, heavy pettin'. You kinda' just...I mean you uh. Touch. A lot. Usually." He struggled to explain, again finding himself walking the line of trying not to scare her while still giving her the information she sought. "Demonstration? I ain't so good at this." He finally suggested ruefully.

Irene nodded and Arthur drew his index fingers over her collarbone, framing it briefly before he slipped further down. Slowly, so as not to frighten her, he cupped her breasts through the undershirt, letting their weight rest in his palms.

He had to clear his throat before he spoke next. "Okay?" Irene nodded, her expression almost laughably serious. "I'm gonna' move my thumbs now. Just gentle, no pinchin'." Arthur informed her. "You let me know if that's okay."

"Mmhm." She inhaled sharply the second he grazed over her nipples, a little hiccup leaving her. Arthur had never encountered that particular reaction and he lingered in the same spot, swiping his thumbs back and forth across the soft mounds of her breasts. He felt her body begin to react, her nipples waking underneath his touch. 

"Okay?" He rasped, his throat dry all of a sudden. Irene looked...drowsy, almost, the woman biting her lower lip and just watching his hands move. 

"Feels good." She whispered. "I...I think I like it?"

"You ain't sure yet? Want me to stop?"

Arthur barely got the question out before she said, "no!", flushing immediately afterwards. "I-I mean no, please...please keep going?" She requested, not meeting his eyes. 

He chuckled, "okay then. Just relax. I've got you, Miss Irene." Her hands fumbled for purchase on his suspenders and Arthur was delighted when she shoved them off over his shoulders, the woman whimpering as he removed his hands from her briefly to slip out of the loops. "Shh, I'm right here." Arthur murmured, returning to his previous ministrations.

"I don't know what to do." Irene breathed, resting her forehead on his shoulder. "What do I do, Arthur? Can't j-just--" her voice hitched, fingers digging into his upper arms as he continued to gently stroke her. "Sit here, not doing anything."

"Lemme' take care of you for a l'il bit, okay?" The older man offered softly. At his insistence, she laid back, propping herself up on her elbows and then gifting him a tender little cry when he dipped his head to mouth and tease at one of her nipples through the shirt's thin fabric. 

Rain began to patter on the tent's canvas roofing, dulling the sounds of the surrounding woodlands. It was like a curtain being drawn, shielding Arthur from the outside and narrowing his world down to nothing but the woman currently arching her entire body up in search of his mouth. Irene reached for him blindly, her hands so delicate in his own when he laced their fingers together and pressed his lips back to her breast through the shirt's material.

She writhed beneath him, little noises of desperation issuing from her without much preamble. It was as if she was starved for touch. In a way, Arthur supposed dimly, they both were. Her guarding her secret, trying her hardest to be cautious and he keeping his own secrets, trying to work around the blatant duality of his existence. 

We're thieves in a world that don't want us no more. 

But here, here, in this sheltered glade, the two of them might find a moment of reprieve. A haven.

Irene grasped at the hem of the shirt, going to tug it over her head and immediately getting stuck because she hadn't unbuttoned it first. The woman thrashed, nearly elbowing Arthur in the face, and he couldn't help the way his laughter exploded out of him. "Whoa there! Easy, hold on." He said, lending her a hand to unbutton the shirt from the inside so she could get it over her head safely.

She was breathless from giggling by the time they managed to free her from the shirt's clutches, and Arthur had to kiss her again. Tentatively her hands traveled up the back of his neck and found their way to his shaggy hair. She tugged, making him rumble into her mouth. "You wanted to see me?" Irene asked shyly, and Arthur realized she was trying to display some sort of willingness. 

"If it's alright, ma'am, I would." He murmured, keeping his eyes on hers. She nodded and Arthur gave her a gentle peck on the lips before drawing back, settling onto his knees so he could really take in the sight. 

Outside he had done his best not to ogle. Which had been incredibly difficult. But Arthur Morgan wasn't some skin-hungry yearling, and he could usually determine when to avert his eyes. 

In the twilight of the tent she was a damn vision. He reached out and cupped the back of her calf, palming the curve of the muscle that lurked beneath the skin when he moved her leg to open her up just a bit. She was strong, forged of stubborn steel. His eyes traveled up, lingering on the thatch of dark curls at the apex of her thighs. Further up to her breasts, pebbled with gooseflesh and no doubt still feeling the echoes of his mouth. Her collarbone had been so delicate under his hands, like some fanciful artisan’s filigree. That throat, Lord, to tarry there and cover her skin with reminders of him would be heaven-! His eyes shifted to her freckled shoulders, the area littered with old scars. Arthur had the sneaking suspicion that her back would have borne the brunt of what she had gone through.

He wished he could stop time itself and sketch her just like this.

"You're beautiful." He mumbled, only half-aware that he was even speaking. Irene squirmed, covering her face, but Arthur gently caught one of her hands and tugged it away. "Irene, you're beautiful." He repeated, a little louder.

"You...you don't mean that, Arthur." She replied weakly. 

"Oh yes I do, ma'am." He insisted, her pulse thundering against his lips when he kissed the inside of her wrist. "Can I…may I?" 

Irene nodded rapidly, her head falling back when Arthur spread her legs. He abruptly felt like a starving man at a banquet table. Her cunt was flushed pink, honest, glistening with the slick of her arousal. Her thighs trembled against his forearms. 

Jesus. 

Arthur rubbed a palm across his face, trying to judge whether his stubble might be a bit too aggressive for the obviously sensitive area. "Hey, I…I'm gonna' try somethin', okay? You let me know if…" he trailed off when he looked up and saw her with her arm over her eyes, hiding from him again. Her cheeks were ruddy, whether from embarrassment or excitement he was uncertain. "Irene? Look at me." He implored, reaching out to tip her chin down. "You're okay, it's okay."

She hesitantly put her arm down, biting her lip. "Nervous," was all she said.

"You want me to stop?" Arthur asked, hating the way she still looked surprised. "I will stop."

"No, I just...I'm not used to it being so…" Irene paused, clearly searching for the correct word. "Gentle."

Arthur groaned, "you're killin' me woman. Tell me if you ain't likin' what I'm doin'." He sank down between her legs, urging her up a little on the bedroll so he could lay on his belly. Jesus, he was lost. She was shaking under his touch, quivering just from his kisses on her inner thighs. Arthur continued to make soft noises in his throat, trying to keep her calm as he worked his way higher. 

"A-Arthur?" Her voice broke, questioning. "Arthur, that's my-"

"Sure is." Arthur replied, already drunk on the clean, delicious scent of her. "I'm gonna' just...have a little taste."

He was slow, careful, like he was out stalking prey in the grasslands. Soft kisses that made their way relentlessly inward to his prize until finally, he parted her lower lips with his thumbs and lapped at the nectar that seeped forth. Irene flinched, obviously startled by his mouth on her, and her hands flew to his hair. Arthur waited for a beat, and then cautiously continued tonguing at her. "This--this cannot be proper, Mister Mor-gan--" Irene tried to reason, her voice gone reedy. "What if-"

"You just washed yourself, ma'am." Arthur drawled from between her thighs, rubbing his stubbled cheek against the inside of her leg teasingly. "Ain't nothin' else that concerns me if you're likin' it."

"I...oh, Lord, I can't think." Was her shaky response. "Wh-What are you doing to me, Arthur?"

"Showin' you how the worst outlaw this side of Saint Denis pleases a woman." He growled, the words hanging heated and sharp as a knife in the air between them before he resumed the sweet toil of eating her out. 

She whined high, her fingers kneading at his scalp making his eyes roll shut in satisfaction. "Ar-thur, I--oh, Jesus, Arthur!" Irene sobbed when he lashed her clit with his tongue, rolling over it again and again.

"That good, hmm?" Arthur asked rhetorically, smiling against her when all he got was a moan in reply. She was so damn hot on his tongue, her core soaked with desire just from his heavy petting. That she had never experienced pleasure with a man was asinine, and Arthur privately vowed to give her everything that he could. Fastening his lips down over her clit, he swept his tongue back and forth in a tick-tocking motion that made her nails dig into his scalp. 

That's not just something they put in the books so women don't decide to never get bedded?

"Gotta' admit," Arthur said, pulling away for a moment. "I'm a little curious about those books you been readin' if women are gettin' bedded in 'em." He continued with a teasing grin, full-blown laughing when Irene covered her face and shook her head, groaning. "What, no recommendations for me, Miss Irene? I enjoy a good piece of literature as much as the next feller!"

"You are cruelty incarnate, Arthur Morgan." She huffed. 

Arthur relented, delving back into her with his fingers and tongue as an apology. He assumed from the half-stifled whimpers of don't stop that he was forgiven his transgressions. "You taste so damn good." He muttered, rumbling in approval when her hips rocked upwards and filled his greedy mouth with her cunt. "So damn good, wanna' get every last drop of this treat."

"A-Arthur--" she panted, "I feel...oh God, I…"

Her cunt pulsed under his touch and Arthur stroked his thumb gently over her slit as she came apart for him, every contraction making her slick folds twitch. "There we go," he soothed while she bucked and trembled. "There we go. Nice and easy, Miss Irene." He felt an odd sense of triumph, like when he managed to pick a troublesome stone out of the divot of Chase's frog. Androcles didn't have quite the same ring as Arthur, however. 

Irene's chest was rising and falling rapidly, the woman still gasping for air. Arthur was unprepared for when she seized the front of his shirt and pressed her mouth to his own, whimpering even as she licked at his tongue. Arthur exhaled hard, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her back. Probably more roughly than he should have. 

"You okay?" He panted, his nose brushing her own when he reluctantly pulled back an inch or so. 

"Yes, God yes." She sighed, embracing him and giving him a dazed, oddly grateful smile. "Are you...I-I mean, would you like to…"  Irene tried to ask, that sweet blush making its way down to her shoulders. 

Arthur cupped her breast again, rolling over the tight little peak with his thumb. "'Would I like to'...what?" He questioned playfully. "Use those pretty words of yours, Irene."

"I'm scared." She told him honestly, her breath hitching at his touches. "I...it's unbecoming to be so wanton-"

"Honest, Irene. The word you're lookin' for is honest. Ain't nothin' wrong with knowin' what you want." Arthur hurried to interject. "The only sin is helpin' yourself to what ain't freely given."

"Arthur…" she trailed off, staring at him like she had never seen him before. 

He cleared his throat after a minute. "Yeah?"

"I...thank you, Arthur. I wouldn't have--thank you for saying that." Irene laughed, "suppose now you're the one saying what I need to hear."

"I s'pose so." Arthur agreed, grimacing when a flash of lightning lit up the tent. Thunder rolled after a time, the storm still a ways away. His hands moved to the buttons on his shirt, easing them open one by one. Irene had herself propped up on her elbows again, and Arthur wouldn't say her expression didn't do wonders for his ego. "You'll catch flies if you don't close your mouth, Miss Irene."

She snapped her mouth shut, turning her head away with a nervous giggle. "Sorry! I-I apologize, I know staring is rude." 

"Flattery will get you everywhere, Irene." Arthur said softly, his hands falling into his lap after he shrugged free of his shirt. He saw her eyes dart over towards him, the woman clearly trying to be more surreptitious about her peeping. "Ma'am, you are buckass on my bedroll. You're more than welcome to look." He drawled, his words laced with a confidence he didn't exactly feel. He knew what he looked like. 

Irene covered her eyes, and then peeked through her fingers at him. "Are...are you certain?" Instead of replying verbally, Arthur just began unbuttoning his placket. "Arthur, I...oh." She mumbled as he shoved his pants off of his hips and down his legs, freeing up his cock. "Oh, Lord." Her hand actually moved like she wanted to touch him, but she flinched back. 

Arthur groaned low in his throat, pleasantly warmed by her reaction. It had been far too long since he had indulged himself, and even longer since he'd had such lovely company while doing so. "You can touch me, y'know." He offered, and her hand crept forward again. 

"It...I won't hurt you?" Irene asked worriedly, her fingers hovering in midair just above his turgid cock. The damn thing was already slick with pre-spend, droplets continuing to leak forth as though his whole body was just waiting for her to be brave.

"Touch gentle-like." Arthur instructed, gritting his teeth when she circled the head of his dick with the pad of her index finger. "Jesus Mary n' Joseph-" he cursed under his breath, the sensation of her fondling him like the lightning outside had leaped into his blood. Then, "your husband didn't let you touch him?"

"I was told to be still and quiet for him." Irene replied absently, her attention blatantly elsewhere as she drew her finger up and down the side of his cock. "He didn't last long. I assume he feared if I touched him, his fuse might shorten even further." 

Arthur tried to stifle his snort of laughter to no avail, waving off the inquisitive look she gave him. "Sorry, sorry. I'm just...I ain't really surprised, is all." He quipped, feeling more than a bit smug. He choked on his next breath when she wrapped her fingers around his cock, the woman seeming to gauge the weight of him in her palm. 

"It's not nearly so terrifying when I can see it." Irene remarked bluntly, trailing her thumb over the sensitive head. 

Arthur grunted, catching her wrist. "Easy now, Irene. I'll freely admit eatin' you out mighta' shortened my own fuse, don't take it personal." He pressed another kiss to the inside of her wrist, nipping at the tender skin there and hearing her gasp softly. "I'd like to bed you very, very much, Miss Irene." He breathed. "Show you how it ought to be."

"I…" Irene hesitated, the pattering of the rain and the encroaching thunder the only sound in the tent for a moment. "It won't hurt?"

"I hope not. But if it does, you tell me an' I'll stop." Arthur murmured, framing her face with his large hands so she couldn't hide from him. "I swear it, Irene. I ain't gonna' hurt you if I can help it." He promised fervently. "Not that kinda' man, okay?"

"I know you're not." Strong words. Brave, considering her history, her lack of knowledge about his past and her current vulnerable state. "Oh, but…" she paused, then carried on stiffly, "Arthur, if I get pregnant-"

"T-There's...ways to prevent that." He should have...it wasn't impossible to get ahold of condoms, in spite of the advertising restrictions. He felt like an idiot. "I don't have...I mean, I'll be careful." Lord, since when did he talk about this so openly? Lightning flashed like punctuation on his sentence. Irene looked pensive, her eyes wide in the dim light, but Arthur would have sworn he saw relief there. 

"I know there are more ways than one. My father was a doctor," was her even reply. "Please do what you can. I'm sorry I'm not more prepared."

"Irene…" Arthur was at a loss, cradling her head to his chest. "You trust me?" He asked for the second time that day, his voice a hard rasp.

"Yes."

No hesitation. Arthur closed his eyes, warring with himself. Nothing that he knew about was foolproof. But nothing that her father could have known about was foolproof either, aside from abstaining altogether. Things could fail. 

They would be careful, he assured himself. "Okay." He croaked out, trying for a smile. "Lay down with me."

Irene obliged without question, seeming a bit confused when he had her straddle his hips. Arthur pulled her to his chest for a slow, sloppy kiss, feeling his cock slide against her wet little cunt when he rolled his hips upwards. Irene gasped out his name, her hands clutching helplessly at the bedroll beneath them. "A-Arthur!"

"Yes, Irene?" The man drawled against the shell of her ear, smirking into her skin as she whined.

"Th-This is--"

"Different, I know. Maybe considered unseemly. But I want you as close as I can get you, Irene. And…" Arthur paused, burying his face in the curve of her throat. "Want you to be able to get away from me if you need to, okay?" He explained softly. "Ain't gonna' hurt my feelin's, I promise."

Her exhale was a sharp little thing, as though she had just been pricked by a thorn. "You won't make me stay?"

"Not if you don't want to, no." Arthur answered firmly, taking no offense to her query. "You say stop, I stop." As much as he hated to admit it, this wasn't exactly his first rodeo with someone like Irene. People like him tended to be...heavy-handed, so a little caution and consideration went miles.

She kissed him hard then, making Arthur groan into her mouth when she wrapped her fingers around his cock and stroked him between their bodies. He knew he must have throbbed in her grip, because she tightened her hold momentarily in response. "I'm...going to put this inside me now." Irene announced, a little awkwardly. 

Arthur chuckled, the noise quickly dissolving into a gasp as she shifted her weight and the head of his cock pushed past her slick folds, Christ she was hot-

The man tangled his fists into the bedroll so he didn't grab onto her and rut upwards like he instinctively wanted to do, his breath coming in harsh, raspy pants as she slowly worked herself down on his cock. "Mary mother of-" Her little sighs and moans had Arthur gritting his teeth to the point that his jaw ached. "You alright?" He managed to ask, daring to raise his hands to rest on her thighs. 

"Yes." Irene breathed, the smile on her face a moment later looking like sheer bliss. Arthur was a goner. 

"You sure?" He had to verify, his hands traveling upwards to cup her face. "Feels good for me no matter what, you know that. Need it to be good for you, too." 

Her eyes opened and she looked down at him, stealing the breath out of his chest as she threaded her fingers into his hair. "It's already good. Now make it better." 

…

"So what will you do now?" Arthur asked sleepily, nuzzling his nose into her tousled curls. The rain pattering on the canvas of the tent was lulling him into a doze. The air had cooled considerably in the wake of the storm. thank the Lord for small favors. 

Irene's sigh gusted across his collarbone. "Not certain. I never dreamed to think about what would happen if I was truly free. Ever since I found out about him being dead, I've...I'm not sure how to explain it. There is relief, of course, but also a type of dread. I have grown used to this nomadic lifestyle. I have grown used to not being tied down by civilization."

"You sure 'bout that?" Arthur chuckled, "you still talk like you're sittin' in a parlor enjoyin' tea with the high society."

"Oh, you and I both know that you catch more flies with honey, Mister Arthur." He felt her smile against his chest, "I...there was a sort of interlude to this life that I found enjoyable when I believed I was still hiding. A simplicity. I knew I could not settle anywhere with other folk, not for very long anyway, as it would make it more and more difficult to hide who I was. So I did not want to settle anywhere." She hummed, stretching languidly against his side. 

Arthur rumbled, his hands wandering over her deliciously-naked body. "You still feel that way, Irene?" 

"I don't want to go back." She murmured. "There's nothing there for me anymore. Yet I don't think I truly belong anywhere just yet." 

"How about with me?" Arthur offered quietly, tilting her chin up so he could cover her throat with kisses. He rolled onto his side and pulled her back to his chest, continuing to nudge his nose against the side of her jaw until she giggled that he was tickling her. "You could come join the gang." Bold words, he realized a little too late. "I'm sure the other gals would love you, and Dutch-"

Irene shook her head and Arthur fell silent, burying his face in her curls to inhale her scent with a sort of forlorn resignation. "It's very kind of you to offer, Mister Arthur, but I'm afraid foisting myself upon an already established group would be a recipe for disaster. In a way, I am still uncertain of my identity. Despite my age, I have never really...been myself. I have always been something else, had some role strapped to my back. Now that I've truly shed it, I'll need time to settle into being who I ought to be." She threw him a smile over her shoulder. "Whether Frank, Irene, or some amalgamation of the two, I am uncertain. But I do know this: I am glad to have met you, Arthur Morgan. For you helped me banish the burden of fear that bowed my shoulders so readily. I thank you from the bottom of my heart." 

Arthur was silent for a time, mulling everything over. "Suppose I'd better make the most of this then, huh?" He asked finally, gesturing upwards at the roof of the tent. "Don't sound like that rain is plannin' on stoppin' anytime soon." His cock twitched against her rear, and he grunted when she shifted her weight. 

"Like this?" Irene asked curiously, raising her leg and hooking it over the back of his thigh so his freshly-awakened cock could rub across her folds.

Arthur huffed out a breath, seizing her hip with one hand to keep her still. "You're playin' a dangerous game, woman." His voice grated a bit.

"You don't scare me, Arthur Morgan." She replied playfully.

Because you don't know who I am. If you did...maybe I would. 

Arthur closed his eyes to ward off that dark thought, and in his moment of distraction her hand wrapped around his cock and she canted her hips back, guiding him inside her once again. 

It was like finally coming home, a soothing balm for the spirit that had been forced to wander for so long. Arthur sheathed himself as deep as he dared, her breathy cries of his name more than enough praise to keep him warm in the no-doubt solitary months to come.

"Irene, Irene, you're beautiful." He clumsily complimented her, his lips pressed to her ear so she could hear whatever fool thing came out of his mouth. "God dammit, you are so beautiful. Perfect." His hands found her breasts, cupping and caressing them until she was writhing, bucking back against him in a manner that was downright wanton.

He loved it. The feeling of her around him, beside him, underneath his hands…

Arthur Morgan did not consider himself a good man. He did not consider himself a particularly smart man either. But right now, right now, he considered himself to be a remarkably lucky man.

"I'm close-" he choked, growling when Irene clenched down on him and keened to announce her own climax. Arthur nearly spent himself inside her, only just managing to pull out and spill his seed on her thigh instead. He snarled as he came, the sensation of his hand downright disappointing after being so deep in her. "Christ alive, Irene." He panted startled when she gently palmed his still hard cock and carefully urged it back inside her. "Easy, woman--"

"I just like the feeling, that's all." Irene assured him, shivering and arching her back against his chest as she moved into a downright luxurious stretch. 

Arthur groaned, wrapping his arms around her to keep them pressed together. His hands rested at the apex of her thighs, and he stroked absently over the skin he found there. "I'd love to have stayed inside you, but I know neither of us are keen on bringin' a new young'un into the world." He tried to smile, tried to make it a joke.

"Maybe someday." 

Irene's nonchalant, sleepy words hit Arthur like a punch to the gut. What was this woman doing to him? Arthur loathed himself for the way his heart hitched, ached at the idea of having a child. For the longest time in his younger years he had deluded himself into thinking that he might have something like that with Mary, dreaming about domesticity of all things. Going out and teaching little Jack how to fish had been torture, because all he could think about was John leaving the boy behind and Jesus Christ, how could a person ever do something like that?

"I think I'm gettin' a little too old." He admitted quietly. "Think the ship's sailed on that one. Plus, I mean, with the stuff I'm involved in…" he trailed off, tightening his hold ever so slightly. Irene yawned, snuggling down into his arms. He kissed her cheek. "Ah, don't mind me, Irene. I'll wake you up if anythin' happens."

She drifted off so quickly, leaving Arthur alone with his thoughts. He eventually pulled away from her, a hand on her back to keep her still, and he felt a ridge beneath his fingertips. Squinting in the dim light of the tent, he realized it was a scar. And it wasn't alone, her back was fairly riddled with them. 

His stomach dropped in dismay. Arthur was not free of his own scars, of course. The ones on his chin were freely visible, and the rest of his body bore a fair amount of mileage to that end. He hadn't had an easy time of it. No one in the Van Der Linde gang had. 

He untied the tent flap and propped it open after shuffling back into his pants, lighting the remains of his cigarette. The older man stared out at the rain for a good long while, his mind thousands of miles away as the cigarette slowly burned to ash between his lips. Tomorrow morning, perhaps the morning after that if he was fortunate enough to steal a bit more time, they would part ways once more, cast themselves adrift to the tides of fate. 

He might never see her again. 

After the weeks he had spent, wondering whether the phantom woman in the Valentine hotel had been nothing but a figment of his imagination...and now, knowing that she was real, flesh and blood...

Arthur lit another cigarette and reached for his satchel, tugging free his journal and then settling in to sketch her sleeping form. Here and now, in this secret clearing, he would eke out some semblance of peace. The graphite stub swept across the page, capturing forever the curve of her cheek, the glorious mess of that chestnut-brown hair, the wrinkles of the blanket that he had draped over her in case the breeze grew too ambitious. 

Turns out the man I THOUGHT was Frank was actually -IRENE-. The world does so love to afflict me with its twists and turns...

Bonus: A Brief Diversion

#arthur morgan #arthur morgan x original female character #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 fanfic #rdr2 arthur #rdr2 fandom #rdr2 spoilers #rdr2 community #hurt/comfort #and now the good stuff #welcome to my indulgence #I am a simple man #high honor arthur

[sixsclassic]

Pact: Chapter 1

One mistake, leads to a whole new life. But it also leads to five other people deciding to take on the same fate of becoming mothers.

“Kat, come on, it does not take that long to take a test.” Anna huffs as she heavily knocks on the bathroom door, “Come on, we’re all waiting to see.” Katherine was perched on the counter of the bathroom, eyeing the pregnancy test beside her, that she had face down. She dreaded the fact that she told her best friend, Anna, that she was late on her period. In turn, causing Anna to panic and tell the rest of their friend group, including two of Kat’s older cousins, Anne and Jane. Those two wanted to murder Katherine boyfriend, Liam, on the spot, but luckily Catalina keeps them on a short leash. 

The teen was always careful about her body, especially when she and Liam started to become intimate about a year ago. Though she hid it from everyone since it embarrassed her in a way, even with how vocal Anne was about her ‘experiences’ since Kat was welcomed into the friend group a few years ago. “Yeah Kat, I promise to not murder that dumbass.” Anne promises from the other side of the door as she heard someone smack Anne, causing her to yelp out in pain. “I promise to not murder Liam.” Anne repeats, this time calling Liam by his name, though Anne claims she calls him dumbass in a loving fashion. 

Katherine’s heart was pounding in her chest as she thought about the outcomes depending on whether or not the test was positive. She was sure her dad would kill her, her mother had passed away when she was in kindergarten on a business trip and it had just been him and Katherine since then. Her dad never remarried or dated, he focused his life on his job and his daughter, that was all he needed in the world after losing his wife. And Katherine would sure he’d either kill her or she’d give him a heart attack and that would kill him. 

Her father also liked her boyfriend, so maybe he wouldn’t be super mad since Liam is good to her and that they’ve been together since the sixth grade, though he’s probably hoping that his fifteen year old daughter won’t become pregnant. And she was worried how it would affect her and Liam’s relationship. If she was pregnant, would he stay? Or would he run off from her as soon as she got the words out. Or if she wasn’t pregnant, she was thinking of the best way to approach her father about going on birth control, a conversation that she was too scared to have with him before. 

“Kat, you have five seconds to open the door before Anna knocks it down.” Cathy warns as the fifteen year old sighed, getting herself down from the counter and going to unlock the door. Once she swung the door open, Anne as well as Anna came tumbling in while the other three teen girls rolled their eyes at them. 

“What does it say?” Jane was the first to ask as Katherine shrugged her shoulders. 

“I haven’t looked at it yet.” Katherine replied as she glanced over at the test that was still face down as the other girls glanced over at it. “Are you ever going to look at it?” Catalina questions as Cathy elbows her and attempts to shush the eldest of the group. 

To be fair Catalina had ever right to be worried as Kat was the youngest of the friend group. It was like a big sister situation with all of them since they were all seventeen or eighteen while she was fifteen. They joked when they met her, that they adopted Kat since Anne dragged her to their table each lunch and insisted that they would all love her and she wasn’t wrong at all. “I’m too scared to look at it.” Kat whispers as the girls looked at each other, still not sure what to do since they only found out what was going on about an hour ago. 

Kat had been out school for a few days since she was sick and they went to check on her and she attempted to them that she was late for her period and they all wanted to murder Liam, then Cathy was the voice of reason as they all checked on her and Jane was the one to go out to purchase the pregnancy test which led them to where they currently are. “Can one of us look at it?” Anna asks as Kat glanced up at her, thinking for a moment as she nods her head slightly before sitting down on the toilet since the lid was down. 

The five girls all glanced around at each other as they were trying to silently decide who was going to look at the test as Anne finally stepped forward and took the test into her hands. The eighteen year old flipped the test over and furrowed her eyebrows as she looked at it. “Wow it has two lines, usually Jane’s only has one.” she remarks as Jane smacked her shoulder, as she looked over Anne’s shoulder to see the results of the test. 

Katherine knew it wasn’t good when Jane’s first reaction was to gasp. “Holy shit, he’s a dead man.” Jane states as she stepped forward and took the test from Anne’s hands and gently placed it into Kat’s. “Look, I know it’s scary Kat, but you gotta look at it.” Jane says as she knelt in front of Katherine. 

The fifteen year old took a deep breath, as she glanced down at the results. Two pink lines. “That means I’m pregnant, doesn’t it?” Kat asks, through teary eyes as Jane nodded her head slightly. 

“It’s gonna be okay, we’re all here for you.” Jane promises. 

“Well Anne and I might end up in jail.” Anna speaks up as Jane glares over at her. 

“No one is ending up in jail if we have something to take care of.” Jane says through gritted teeth as the A girls both stood there quietly. Finally Catalina stepped forward and leaned down beside Kat, “Look lovey, we’re not mad at you and I promise that we will not go after Liam, but do you think you have an idea of what you wanna do? So we can help you with it? Do you need to go to a doctor’s to make sure you and the fetus are okay? Or do you want us to take you to Planned Parenthood? Because I will do whatever you need, whenever you’re ready.” Catalina promises and Kat’s couldn’t take her eyes off the test. 

She also couldn’t believe what Catalina was saying to her either. Catalina was heavily religious, though she never pushed it onto the other girls, but Kat always thought that she was against abortions, but maybe she was wrong on Catalina’s standpoint and she felt bad for assuming. “Is it okay if I’m not sure now?” Kat asks as she glances up at the older girl. 

“Take your time figuring it out Kat, we are here for you.” Catalina says, gently patting Kat’s shoulder, “We got you.” 

“I think you should talk with Liam before you make a big decision, but it’s your body and it’s your choice. And he goes against that, then we will go after him. He can’t dictate what you decide.” Cathy adds as Anna nods her head in agreement. Kat looked over one of her cousins for some guidance. 

“Annie, what should I do?” Kat asks as Anne meets her eyes. 

“Personally Kat, if you want to keep it, I think you should, if you don’t, like Catalina said, I will be right there holding your hand through the whole thing. And I will murder Liam if he forces you into one decision or another. You’re like my baby sister and I will protect you through anything.” Anne answers. 

“If I keep it, I’m gonna seem like the school slut.” Kat states as she receives a chorus of no’s. She had her group, but it was a small group and they attended a rather large school if she did keep the baby, then word would get out as she got further into the pregnancy. 

“Well if you keep it, I’ll get pregnant too, so if they wanna talk about you, then they have to talk about me too.” Anne replies as Catalina looked at her with the dumb look she gave Anne, every time she said something stupid. 

“That’s the dumbest thing you’ve all week.” Catalina says. 

“No I’m dead serious, if she keeps it. I’ll start a damn pregnancy pact, the rest of you are welcome to join me.” Anne says bluntly as she crosses her arms. 

“Why?” the rest of the girls question. 

“Like I said, they can’t be mean to Kat if it’s more than one of us.” Anne replies as Kat was so confused and shocked to say anything in reply. 

“Well then I’m into too.” Jane says, nodding her head as Kat looked at her with a shocked face. Now Catalina was looking at Jane with her dumb look too. Sometimes she couldn’t handle the cousins, because they say this stuff.

#six the musical fanfic #six the musical fanfiction #six fanfiction #six fanfic

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

Multiples of 6 for the OC asks!

AYYYYYYYYYY THANK YOU

i think for this one i’ll answer each question with three ocs for comparison >:V

(under the cut because, predictably, It Got Long)

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6. Do they smoke or do they hate smoking. 

(origfic, unnamed superhero verse)

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Neil: won’t touch cigarettes, but has been known to smoke a bowl every now and then when his anxiety gets the best of him. he doesn’t like doing it--he’s internalized some pretty negative shit about how it means he’s a trashy, weak-willed loser who can’t handle reality--but since meeting nads and then beth, he’s eased up a lot on the guilt and is able to relax more.

Nads: smokes cigarettes, but only if they’re stolen. she’s got an active lifestyle to say the least and she doesn’t want to risk fucking up her lungs, so that’s her compromise. my god does she love her weed though

Beth: smokes cigarettes to take the edge off her anxiety when she has to go outside during the day. she knows they’re worse for her than weed, but she’s wary enough of her liminal space powers without imagining what they might do if she got stoned.

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12. What’s an outfit they’d despise wearing Vs one they’d love wearing? Draw it! 

(Tales of Arcadia; i’m godawful at drawing clothes so i’ll just describe them as best i can ashdflkshdfkl)

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Liyen: loves comfortable, understated, professional-looking masc clothes, usually in muted shades of gray, blue, or black. give them a fuzzy turtleneck sweater and black pants and they’re happy. meanwhile they’d be SUPER uncomfortable in loud, clashing colors or anything too femme. 

Schommag: Does Not Like Clothes That Will Get in Her Way, also not a big fan of dressing femme with very few exceptions (the right Little Black Dress, for example). give her what she needs to get around the woods and stay out of her way. that said she does love showing off her muscles, so she wears a lot of tank tops and sports bras (and sometimes no top at all, if she can get away with it). 

Oryalv: VERY femme, particularly business casual. this man loves his pantsuits. meanwhile his nightmare is middle-aged high school coach aesthetic. put him in a t-shirt and khakis and he’ll start pouring smoke like a teakettle

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18. Have they ever committed a crime? How? Why? If not, then what’s their opinion on crime?

(origfic, unnamed VALENTINE DON’T DO THAT verse)

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Valentine: has been made complicit in a lot of their family’s cutthroat-noble shadiness growing up, is otherwise a law-abiding sort up until they jump off the slippery slope and get the war crime ball rolling in earnest. Whoops

Edmund: has gotten into plenty of cutthroat-noble shadiness of his own volition, thank you very much. unlike valentine he’s a whole lot more inclined to go UHHH and pull up when it comes to war crimes

Marcel: LOVES war crimes. LOVES them. would marry them if he could. lucky for him he’s captain of the guard and has plenty of opportunities. will otherwise use the law as a bludgeon but i don’t think he’s too bothered about it for its own sake

-

24. Mcdonalds, subway, or KFC?

(Final Fantasy Tactics A2)

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Nebilim: subway, grease is sensory hell and makes him sick and it’s the easiest place to avoid it. the number of variables per sandwich make him anxious, but if he has to pick one then fuck it, it’s worth not putting grease in his body.  

Moovry: loves grease with all his somehow-still-functioning heart, would bring his own beer keg to KFC and refuse to leave til he’s finished his fourth bucket of chicken

York: MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS. gets the happy meal and then uses the toy to test their black magic minispells. we hardly knew ye, beyblade 

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30. Have they ever dreamed about another oc?

(Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance, taxidermy/doll horror cw)

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Faerna: has dreams about missing his mother sometimes. he hasn’t seen her in a long time, and for all he knows she thinks he’s dead, but he can’t bring himself to go back and look for her when he doesn’t know if she’ll approve of the life he’s chosen for himself. for all he talks himself up, not everyone’s happy to have a thief and a conman for a son.

SkekNev: has recurring dreams about the victims of their taxidermy coming back to life. less of a HOLY SHIT THE DOLLS ARE ALIVE nightmare for them, more of an anger/anxiety nightmare because stop that, stop having autonomy, i made you like this for a reason.

Aivne: dreams a lot about her little siblings. outright nightmares, semi-lucid rehearsals of danger scenarios, memories from before they lost their parents.

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36. If they’re nonhuman, what’s their opinion on humans?

(origfic, faeverse)

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Aislinng: vampire/incubus, more specifically A Dracula Lookin Motherfucker. depending on how much of a bastard he is in a given au, humans are usually somewhere between ‘fun to dazzle with my Supernatural Charms’ and ‘boring. where are the interesting people to torment’

Meadowsweet: rabbit faun. depending on which of the two wildly different versions of him we’re talking about, he either treats humans with the same goodwill as anyone else who might need his healing, or looks down on them and considers them fair game for whatever evil bastard he’s pining after this week.

Agaric: aislinng’s son with a forest spirit, so fuck if i know what to call him at this point. humans tend to find his brand of quiet, aloof awkwardness either offputting or endearing; either one is mortifying, and he’d mostly rather just keep to himself. 

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42. What’s their standpoint when it comes to washing hands?

(origfic, bumfuck nowhere cult)

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Cristina: obsessed with cleanliness, washes her hands constantly, crissy please you live in the desert

Skinner: if my hands are clean i can’t wipe them on cristina’s robes now can i

Rosemary: who needs to wash hands when you’ve got tentacles ;)

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48. If they were defeated fairly in battle, would they accept and move on or throw a fit?

(origfic, slasher movie slaughterhouse dimension)

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Maggie: will stay down and let you think she’s beaten, until you take your eyes off her for a second too long. then she’ll go for your hamstring

Dee: will accept it and move on, but will also try to make you feel like winning wasn’t really important anyway. maggie loves her dearly but she is kind of infuriating to everyone else

Esau: is delighted when somebody beats him, because if they’ve gotten that far they’ve committed at least one horrific atrocity and will have to live with that forever (if not embrace it). the real treasure was the corruption and PTSD we found along the way. no wonder maggie kind of hate-connects with him, he reminds her of dee lmao

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54. Have they ever lost anyone?

(misc origfic)

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Gray: lost the person who summoned them, gave them form, and taught them how to speak. once she died, all they knew was that she’d stopped coming, and that their only friend--their only contact with the world outside the cave--was gone. they’re there alone for a long time before a hitchhiker stumbles across them, and now they’re clingy as fuck and terrified of being abandoned again.

Ashdown: lost her wife the spring before her story begins, which left her so depressed she didn’t bother flying south for the winter with everyone else. she does eventually find love again, after coming to terms with the fact that what she’s lost isn’t the only thing she can ever have.

Jake: lost his older brother as a kid, which might or might not be why some fuck haunting their own fursuit recruits him to help with their unfinished business.

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[DYING WHEEZE]

thank you again for the questions!!! i have. so many ocs. SO many ocs, and it’s always fun to get a chance to trot a bunch of them out, especially with a good range of questions like these :D

#the golden ghost #tales of arcadia #dark crystal age of resistance #asks #tag memes #ocs #my ocs #toa tag #origfic tag #my origfic #final fantasy tag #smoking cw #weed cw #dolls cw #origfic group tag #because there's too many to tag all of them on this post asdhfslkdfhsdf

[sebastianshaw]

How involved was Sebastian during Storm's pregnancy? Was he attentive? Was he active in helping pick a name, and suggesting parenting arrangements?

He was worried but tried to maintain a balanced approach and be only as involved as Storm wanted, there but not too close unless desired, but still definitely concerned even when he kept his distance. The way he saw it, she was the one who was pregnant, and it just wasn’t something he could understand no matter how much technical knowledge he read up on (which he did, Shaw doesn’t like being ignorant on anything relevant to him) Women have been having babies for eons without his help, after all, he figured, and Storm is an intelligent, capable woman with a strong regard for life, he was confident she wasn’t going to do anything stupid to endanger a child she planned to have. I think he wanted to be closer, even hovering, maybe even controlling at times (because ofc that’s how he copes with anxiety bc he’s an asshole), but held himself back. Because he knew that if he leaned on her too hard, became too demanding, tried to take the lead himself, she was liable to cut him out of things entirely and he didn’t want that.  That said, he also knew she was heroically inclined and so while he wasn’t worried about her, say, drinking during pregnancy, he probably did have concerns that her higher morality and care for others would lead her to throw caution to the winds and risk it for the greater good, to save the multitude of lives of people already born. And while he knew he couldn’t command or control her, he did certainly ARGUE with her if that ever came up, and being SHAW of course he argued from a standpoint of “rational selfishness” that she should value the life of her OWN child over that of TOTAL STRANGERS. Which is...it’s not a bad argument, he just doubtlessly made it in the most repulsively Shaw way. I like to think she said something like “You are only so concerned because you know THIS will never happen again!” to which he bluntly replied “Yes.” Also while he had no doubt that Xavier had access to top medical care, he still requested---just requested, just asked, he knew not to push his luck---that she see the doctors on his payroll too. “Just for my peace of mind.” I can’t say if she did or not. Maybe if she had time/figured it was better than him breaking into the mansion to get access to her medical files. Mostly, he let her be and trusted her choices around pre-natal care and the like and didn’t interfere with whatever she was doing, but he checked in via calls on a careful schedule following the fetal development. And ACTED very all-business about it, as if he was just following the development of some invested stock, to mask his actual concerns. Yes, god forbid a father actually be concerned about how a pregnancy is coming along, holy shit Shaw this is why your son is like this. I think the name was probably ALL STORM. Shaw figured she was the one carrying this thing for nine months, adjusting her entire lifestyle around it, and pushing it out like the world’s worst kidney stone (something he has personal experience with) she has EARNED name it. If she ASKED that he make suggestions...I feel like in the first place Shaw is probably Not Great at picking something as personal as names, and also they were doubtlessly all Western. Like as cosmopolitan and cultured as he is, I just don’t see him knowing names from the cultures that Storm grew up in. That said, Storm’s gracious enough that, since he’s been behaving himself so well through all this, she might have at least asked him which ones of HER selections he liked best, and I can certainly see him liking “Isis”. (And lbr, would you let someone with a son named “Shinobi” have any say in picking out the name of your daughter? No. You get to choose which you like from this list of what SHE likes, Sebastian, and MAYBE your input will be considered in to her final decision. MAYBE.) I think he probably consulted with a lot of lawyers who specialize in family law about parenting arrangement options and presented her with an array of different contracts and she just looked at him and said, “I’m not signing anything, why don’t we just [thing]?” and he was like “Okay, that’s the document pile third from the right---” She still did not sign shit.

#isis

[takerfoxx]

Magia Record, Season 1, Episode Five, First Impressions!

So. I’ve talked at length about coming into this show already with a weird bias for...reasons. I’ve discussed the various problems it has with its pacing and the lack of depth of its characters in comparison to the original show. I’ve pointed out the many, many issues that would naturally arise from adapting a mobile RPG into a short anime season. And I’ve said that while the final product is probably as good as it could be, it’s still really nothing to write home about, especially considering the franchise’s legacy. It’s like the name says: this is a side story, a fun world-building distraction.

And then we get to this episode, and...

Seriously though, what a great episode! I honestly can’t think of anything negative to say about, so I’ll just keep listing positives.

First, there’s the direction, which has been the one thing that’s been consistently great throughout the show, but it was especially on point here. The visuals during the Seance Shrine fight were incredibly creepy in that wonderfully surreal way that I always loved from PMMM, and the shrine itself was an outstanding setting. Iroha’s witch transformation was downright horrifying in all the best ways, and when her witch went HAM (more on that later), I had my heart in my throat. Like, holy shit! What the fuck is happening?

The conversations with fake Ui and fake Mifuyu were superb as well. Another thing I’d like to praise here is how the writers have really nailed conveying a lot of information while only doing a little. Without beating us over the head with it, we learned so much about our two main leads. First, the fake UI could only repeat the phrase we saw her saying in Iroha’s dream, about how magical girls can be saved if they come to Kamihami City. BECAUSE THAT’S ALL IROHA REMEMBERS HER EVER DOING! That one dream is literally all Iroha has of Ui, so that was all the Seance Shrine was able to take from her memories! The shrine constructs its bait literally through its prey’s memories.

The conversation with the fake Mifuyu also told us a lot about her and Yachiyo’s relationship, as did that very brief flashback. “Don’t you want to become an adult?” That one line broke my heart immediately, and it also told us that Mifuyu and Yachiyo knew what witches really are, and Mifuyu was seeking a way to save them from their fate when she disappeared. The fake Mifuyu’s monologue was much more detailed than that of the fake Ui, because here the Seance Shrine had a feast of memories to work with. And all the little details just served to further demonstrate how much Mifuyu meant to Yachiyo, especially that bit about the coffee cups. I guess she, Yachiyo, and Tsuruno were a team until Mifuyu’s disappearance caused a falling out? Regardless, even though we already know that the Mifuyu is probably a fake, she creates enough doubt in both us and Yachiyo that her “death” hits hard, and it’s clear that it completely tears Yachiyo up inside.

And of course that’s when the Seance Shrine witch (or whatever the rumors are) shows up, and...um...THAT whole thing happened.

It was pretty funny, looking back on my response to what happened to Iroha. Like, at first I was like, “Holy shit, that was crazy! Her witch just tore that thing up? But how did she come back? Doesn’t that contradict a lot of what we already know? I don’t really care for weird new concepts, so I don’t know how I feel about this.” It wasn’t until the after credits scene when the same thing happened to Kaede and it finally dawned on me, and I felt a little stupid for not realizing it earlier. 

THEY’RE DOPPELS! THOSE ARE THE DOPPEL SUMMONS FROM THE GAME!

You know, I never really was sure how I felt about the Doppels. They made sense from a gameplay standpoint, but I always felt that they caused a lot of problems in the overall lore, and wasn’t sure how the show would adapt them, or if it even should. But the way they did it, by making them seem like these horrifying, terrible things that leave the user scared and confused out of their minds was perhaps the best way to do it, and okay, now I’m on board the Doppel train. That was awesome.

But we can’t talk about awesome without going over what happened next, because just as we’re still reeling from having an awful lot thrown at us, the show gives us a gift, two magical words.

TRIO FINALE!

Mami makes her full appearance, and though her scene is short, it’s fucking great. We get to see her in her badass, take no shit veteran persona from the OG show’s second episode, and it drives home quite a lot. First, that Mami is an awesome character and I love getting to see her again. Second, that she really has no idea about what witches are. I mean, we already knew that, but her confusion over Iroha really laid it bare. Third, her words to Tsuruno also told us that Yachiyo has even more going on than we already suspected. She’s hiding something, and whether it’s the whole witch business or something else remains to be seen. It’s the Homura mystery all over again, but just different enough to be it’s own thing.

And then Iroha wakes up at Yachiyo’s place, and we get a nice tension releaser. It’s honestly a very sweet scene, though the show doesn’t stop with its little bits of visual information. Honestly, I love how good they’ve gotten at using the visuals to clue the viewer into what’s going on. We see that yes, Yachiyo does still have the coffee cups, and it’s actually Mifuyu’s room she brought Iroha to, a major indicator at how their relationship is going to change, and given what franchise this is, that can either be a good thing or a bad thing. Yachiyo is still too much of a mystery to really tell, but this episode really gave us a lot to chew on.

And speaking of visual storytelling and direction, can I take the moment to praise the pacing? It’s been rocky in the past, but in this case, I felt that every scene was exactly as long as it needed to be, happened exactly when it should, and conveyed exactly what it needed to. So much happened, but the writing was so tight that it kept me hooked from beginning to end.

And lol Iroha. “I have to go to school! Oh...it’s Saturday.” Been there.

...

Goddamn, what a great episode! I mean, sure, it could all go to shit in the future, but this is the first time I couldn’t wait for the next episode to come out. Ten outta ten, well done. 

#puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #magia record #iroha tamaki #yachiyo nanami #tsuruno yui #mami tomoe #mifuyu azusa

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #271

“some of those who work forces are the same that burn crosses.”

Do you cook on the stove at all, or just microwave? I just use the microwave. I'm scared of the stove lmao. Do you ever debate religion with your friends? Bruuuh no. I am so disinterested in debating about something that to me ultimately doesn't matter yet humanity has made so serious. Whatever happens after we die, happens, there's that. Just be a decent human being and go out knowing you did your best to make the world better than when you entered it. Do you keep your shampoo in the shower or someplace else? In the shower. Something your mother said or did that shocked you: Like... recently? Or in my entire life? I dunno about recently, but I guess the most shocking to me was when she vehemently called my sister something I won't repeat. Did your mom go to college? She was before the cancer. Ready to graduate, too, but that didn't go as planned thanks to, y'know, cancer. Which food do you think you have the most cans of in your cupboard? Good question, no clue. I don't really pay attention to the canned foods. Maybe fruits? Do you save fortunes from fortune cookies? No. Are you offended when Christmas is spelled Xmas? Nah. Where do you put your keys when you come home? In my purse. Describe your favorite mug or glass to drink from? I don't have one. That I use, anyway. Sara gave me a Markiplier quote one that's a Holy Item on my shelf and instead of holding a beverage holds All My Love. Your bad habit that you love the most: UGH I hate how much I love soda. Invent a pop tart flavor: STORY TIME!!!! As a kid, there was this contest to design a type and you won like... a fucking huge supply of the newest flavor, which was at the time that wild berry whatever thing. My sister and I made one that I think I recall being pink with heart sprinkles and strawberry flavored, and we won. Guess who fucking hates the wild berry flavor now lmao. Okay but anyway if I was to invent one now... is there a BLUE raspberry flavor? Cuz a bitch loves blue raspberry flavored everything. Do you name your pets after tv/movie/book characters: Sometimes. I don't currently have a pet that is, though. Are you proud of yourself for what you've accomplished? The few things I actually have, sure? I'm more ashamed of what I haven't. Do you own any sexy lingerie? Nooooo no one would want to see me in that, least of all myself lmao. Have you ever caught a bouquet of flowers at a wedding before? No. Has a horse ever neighed at you before? Uhhh I don't think so? Do you prefer ice cream or sorbet? Ice cream. Have you gotten your pets spayed? My cat is. That's like... the only pet we ever have fixed, sadly. My parents/Mom (depending on time period) could just never afford it. The only real reason we managed to get Roman neutered was because our sister directed us to a cheap on-the-go business where it was like... only $45, and Roman was marking the house badly so it was pretty urgent. Would you ever take in a stray animal? HA, that is the STORY of my family with cats. At this current time, most likely not. We don't need another pet right now, nevermind one of a mysterious background with my mom being sick. When is payday? N/A Have you ever walked on a runway before? No. How long is your workday? N/A Is there a walkway or a pathway to your front door? No. What is your favorite color? What is your least favorite color? Pink is superior to all colors. I'm really not a puke-green fan, but I mean... is anyone? What color dominates your wardrobe? Everything is B L A C K. What color are your eyes? Grayish blue. Are you colorblind, or do you know anyone who is? I'm not, but Jason's brother is colorblind to I think red and blue? Do you prefer color photos or black-and white? It greatly depends on the composition and subject matter of the photograph. I find great beauty in both. If I had to pick though, color usually appeals to me more. Are you one of those people who can taste, feel, or smell colors? No. Have you ever seen a double rainbow before? Yes. Do you enjoy coloring? It tends to be my least-favorite part of the art process because that's where I always fuck shit up. Do you know anyone who is racist? Oh my, PLENTY. Welcome to the South. Are your nails painted any color(s) right now? They never are. Can you lift more than 100lbs? I probably CAN, but it would be very hard. What's your opinion on incest? It's fucking repulsive. Morally and negative from a scientific standpoint, anyway. Do you have a favorite color for cats? Orange. What video games did you play when you were younger? I was a massive gamer as a kid, teenager too, so I could put a hell of a lot here. But, I'll just imagine you're referring to when I was quite young. The Spyro games (save for Skylanders) were my LIFE, I loved Nintendogs, the Crash Bandicoot trilogy, lots of games that were based on movies (like Madagascar and Finding Nemo are two I really enjoyed), uhhh... OH! And absolutely weird, but I loved hunting games. Like, I had a whooole lot, despite hating real life hunting even as a child. I think it was because I got to see wild animals, plus it could be calming to wander and scary, too, when things like wolves found you. Oh, and then there were fishing games, too. LOOK I just love(d) games. Would you ever get a tramp stamp? I hate that nickname. Having a tattoo literally anywhere does not equate you to a stereotype. Yes, because I want to be heavily tattooed anyway. Did you cry when Michael Jackson died? No. Not that I didn't care at all, I just wasn't a giant fan. What's the ugliest species of animal? Lmao how mean. The blobfish immediately comes to mind, though. Looks like a ball of mucus shaped into an old man's face. Are you embarrassed about any songs on your iPod? I used to be, now it's just like whatever. I like what I like. What do you use to listen to music on the computer? YouTube. Do people know a lot about you? Places on the Internet sure do lmao. I try to be much more private now online to a degree, depending on where. Irl, no. I'm too easily embarrassed/afraid of being judged for what makes me, me. Who was the last person you slept beside? Sara. Do you like Metallica? They're one of my all-time favorites and I trust NOBODY who claims to hate them. What's your favorite kind of soup? I'm not a fan of soup. What’s your best friend's favorite band? Her all-time favorite is Pink Floyd. Who was the last person you took a picture with? Ummm idr. Do you play Guitar Hero? Not really anymore, but I fuckin slayed that shit back in the day. Whose house did you last visit? My older sister's. Who was the last person to come to your house? My younger sister. What time do you usually eat dinner? Anywhere between 5:30 to like... 7:00 or so. Have you ever searched your own house on Google Earth? Not this current one, no. Does it bother you when people have a loose grip on hugs? No? Some people don't like hugs. Are you looking forward to next year? I don't know. Is covid gonna be history by then? It depends on a lot of things. What have you done so far this summer? *blink blink blink* What's your favorite punk band? Honestly, I don't even really separate bands by genres now because I don't know. There's so so many, plenty overlap, etc. etc, and people - especially those who enjoy rock/metal stuff, I've found - get all snobbish and "WELL ACTUALLY" when you "misgenre" or whatever. Which is better: cold or hot weather? COLD. FUCK hot weather. Anything above ~75*F is disgusting. Is photography something you enjoy? I'm an aspiring photographer so like- What’s the best flavor snow cone? I haven't had a legit snow cone in years... but we have a place called Pelican's Snowballs, which is really just like... snow cones in a cup? They are A M A Z I N G and strawberry is to die for. When driving, are you a speed demon or do you drive like your grandmother? I don't drive because I'm terrified to. Have you ever met someone who just had you at hello? No. Bet you were expecting "Jason," but no, I was weirded out that a stranger just comes up to me in the hall on the way to class and starts talking to me. Have you ever written poetry? Yeah. Do you have any addictions? Technology, ugh. And soda, rip. When was the last time you just laid and looked at the stars? Laid, many years ago one summer when Jason and I were just lying on the trampoline while my dad was grilling. What song reminds you of an ex? A lot. What color eyeliner do you prefer? Black. What was the last thing that you made with your own two hands? Like, made from scratch? Hell if I know. What’s the deepest water you will wade into? Like, shoulder-deep in the ocean. How many blades does your razor have? Three, I think? Highest grade of education you’ve completed? Just one semester of college. Lowest grade you’ve received on a test? Yikes, Fs in college math. He taught in such an abstract way that I failed like... every test, or nearly did. I was too afraid to ask questions continuously. Do you enjoy sitting in the sun or the shade more? There is NO situation where I would rather be in the sun. Do you enjoy going to arcades? Hell yeah. What parades do you like to go to? None. When’s the last time you went on a tirade? I ranted to Mom about the fucking ridiculous anti-maskers that are a big reason this motherfucking pandemic is worsening in America. With my mom being immunocompromised, it is something I take VERY goddamn seriously. It's not a difference in opinion - it's a difference in morality. Do you like to play charades? I loved to as a kid. Now it'd feel weird. Would you ever lead a crusade? I wouldn't want to lead anything. Have your parents ever forbade you from doing something? Aha, so as a kid, I had a game demo disc that showed the preview to Parasite Eve, and my sisters and I would secretly watch it despite it scaring us to where Mom did forbid us to click on it. And all these years later, I've played it and love it... ha ha. Otherwise, my parents have always been pretty open to letting us do stuff, save for things the usual parent doesn't like, like swearing. When’s the last time someone said something degrading to you? A few days back when I got into an argument on Facebook about some asshole teasing their newly-hatched cobra to where it kept striking at the tongs, hood flared and all. Apparently I had no idea what I was talking about, pointing out the snake was clearly stressed out. What’s the last homemade dish you’ve made? I legit haven't cooked a thing since Sara was here and I made her eggs for breakfast. Which was like, a year ago. Do you like lemonade? What flavor(s)? Broooo YES. Pink lemonade is better, but I enjoy just the classic kind, too. Has anyone ever serenaded you before? Fuck this question. Would you like to visit the Everglades? Lemme see them motherfuckin GATORS. Have you ever attended a masquerade ball before? No. Would be dope, though. Have you lost anyone to AIDS? No, thank god. Have you ever been paid for sex? Hell no. Have you ever had a maid in your home before? HUNNY we are too poor for that shit. Do you know how to do different types of braids in hair? No. When’s the last time you wore a Band-aid? Where and why? I have no clue. When was the last time you were afraid? Of what? A family friend was over here a couple days ago and she had this weirdest muscle cramp in her leg that brought her to the floor gasping for like over a minute. I was super scared, and Mom was too, as we had no idea what to do. I almost had to call 911. Crazy woman hasn't gone to the doctor about it, to my knowledge. Would you ever consider growing your hair out to your waist, or longer? NOOOO NO NO. I am probably having short hair for the rest of my life. Is there anywhere in your house that you're scared to be alone in? No. What is your favorite shoe brand? I don't have one. What weird things did you do as a small child? I was just a weird kid in general. I did a lotta stuff that would make people raise a brow. Who puts the most pressure on you in your life? My goddamn self. Do you laugh off embarrassing moments? Hell no, I turn red as a cherry and probably cry once I'm in private. Do you have a favourite actor/actress? If so, who? No. Do you like little kids, or do they annoy you? I feel uncomfortable around them. They're too brutally honest, I feel like every move I make is wrong, and I just generally feel incapable of handling them properly. Do you want a small or a large family when you get older? Well, I don't want any kids, so... Are you a good dancer? If not, do you enjoy dancing anyways? No and no. I'd be embarrassed. Have you ever lied to avoid getting into trouble? Yeah. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital for a long period of time? I'd say two weeks is pretty long, and I was supposed to stay an entire month. I only got out of that by going to court. Do you take a lot of pictures of yourself, or are you camera shy? I HATE being in front of the camera. What are your choice of toppings on a hamburger? And do you prefer gas or charcoal grilling? I just like ketchup, mustard, and pickles, really. A bit of diced onion is fine, too. I prefer gas; I hate the charcoal-y taste. You are chosen to have lunch with the president. the condition is you only get to ask one question. What do you ask? Fuck that, I'd decline going to begin with. What is your concession stand must-have at the movies? Popcorn, of course. Which do you dislike most: pop-up ads or spam email? Pop-up ads. How long was it from ‘the first date’ until the proposal of marriage? How long until the wedding? N/A What topic can put you to sleep quicker than any other? Probably like, wrestling. Golf. Sports in general. How many times did it take you to pass your drivers test? I haven't tried it yet. If you had to have the same topping on your vanilla ice cream for the rest of your life, what topping would you choose? I always just use chocolate syrup. Would you rather be trapped in an elevator, or stuck in traffic? CHRIST, TRAFFIC. Elevators kinda scare me and I'm very scared of being stuck in one. What are you sitting on right now? My bed. Are you listening to anything? Halocene's cover of "Killing In The Name." Have you parents ever hated one of your boyfriends/girlfriends? No. Who was the last person to give you money? I have no idea. Have you ever dreamed of someone you barely know? Actually yeah. Weird as hell. When was the most recent time, if ever, that you felt “impostor syndrome,” or that you felt unqualified to be somewhere? Hm. I suppose when I went to the doctor by myself for my foot. I'd never done an appointment without Mom at all, and I was veeery clueless to a lot of steps, questions, etc. What are some ways that pop culture has helped you learn historic or scientific facts? Some TV shows, I guess. Or games, even. Have you ever had a job in which you felt that you had nothing to do? What was the protocol in that situation (e.g., surfing the web, taking on the job of co-workers, or pretending to work)? If you have not, do you think it would be lucky or unlucky to have such a job? No. I was expected to always be doing something. I'd consider that to be pretty unlucky, as it sounds boring and pointless. Have you ever intimidated or made another person feel legitimately threatened? If not, do you think that you could ever be seen as scary? I don't know. Mom has admitted me yelling has scared her before, though. I can yell pretty fucking loudly. But she herself never felt threatened. And do I think I could be seen as scary? Yes. Especially given my chronic fucking nightmares that almost always involve confrontation. In what ways do you or would you need to be validated by a partner? (For example, liking your posts/talking about you on social media, or perhaps by doting on you with gifts.) I am VERY much a "words of affirmation" person. I NEED reassurance that I'm adequate and sincerely loved. When you are having a hard time emotionally, what are some of the telltale ways that you act out or that your personality reflects your struggles? I become very snappy and more reclusive than usual. I cry really easily. Do you tend to succeed by weaning yourself off of something or by quitting cold turkey? It depends on what it is, but I've generally needed to wean myself off of things when necessary. Is there a specific type of pet breed/size/etc. that you don’t want? Why not? I am very turned off by animal breeds/types that are subject to serious health issues, such as pugs, dachsunds, Persians, spider ball pythons... Just don't fucking breed them. Ironically, some of these are the cutest, but I care far more about the health of the animal. Have you ever lived in a notoriously dangerous area? If not, would it bother you to do so? Yes and yes. Has a friend’s significant other ever interfered with or damaged your friendship? What about a significant other of yours damaging a friendship? I don't believe so, no. What, if anything, is something that you put pressure on yourself about? What do you imagine would happen if you did not live up to this expectation? Getting a job, for Heaven's sake, and actually managing to keep it. I've proven inept in this area so far, so, I've already failed that. :^) If you have been in a serious relationship, have you and your partner ever discussed lifetime plans that clashed? Did you reconcile them or did you break up? If you have not been in a relationship, what are some issues that would be deal-breakers? Jason and I kinda casually talked about kids early in our relationship, at which time I didn't see myself wanting them at all and he did at some point. It didn't really bother either of us, though; it was something we'd figure out if we actually got anywhere. Then he became the only person I could ever imagine myself having kids with. Life's funny.

#survey #quiz #questions

[lovemesomerafael]

It’s Complicated                       Chapter 6:  A Little Too Easy

Source: @kendaspntwd

Chapters 1-5        Story on AO3

Amanda Rollins noticed Rafe Rojas the second he walked into the squad room.  Only a man who lived in jeans could make them fit like that.  And the squint lines around his dark eyes did something to her down low.  He was the lean, cowboy type – well, he was a literal cowboy – she absolutely could not resist.  His hat was well-worn and didn’t disguise the shagginess of his thick, dark hair.  She didn’t mean to come on to him.  She liked Frankie, and Frankie was in deep shit. But her older brother was basically sex in cowboy boots.  So Amanda got real Southern, real fast, the minute she stepped up to Rafe to introduce herself.  Sure, Porter was standing next to him and could have made the introductions.  But Amanda’s ovaries were in charge.  Or some part of her female anatomy, anyway.  

“We’re on our way out to Riker’s,” Porter explained.  “We just stopped by to give you guys a chance to ask any questions you may have thought of.”

“Nikki OK with that?”

“Nikki might not be aware of it,” Porter muttered.  “And your lives might be easier if you didn’t mention this visit to Stone, either. Unless something good comes out of it.  But I trust you guys.  I know you’re on Frankie’s side.  ”  

Dodds introduced himself to Rafe, who was a few inches shorter and a few shades darker.  Rafe’s voice was deep and Amanda thought she detected just the slightest twang, like a delicate spice that gave a tasty dish just the right, subtle kick.  

For several minutes, the group discussed anything in Frankie’s past that might be either helpful or hurtful, but there was nothing.  She was who she was.  She had no skeletons, no previous arrests (knife-related or otherwise), and no history of any kind of violence, unless having a hair-trigger temper and a sharp tongue counted. Rafe couldn’t help the case, except to reassure them that there were no surprises in his sister’s past waiting to trip her up.  

Porter and Rafe left shortly thereafter.  Amanda could feel her thighs quiver when Rafe touched his hat to her and said, “Miss,” as he left.  Amanda was positive he gave her a subtle wink along with his nod.  She stood just a little too long watching the hallway after they’d turned the corner toward the elevators.  

 *********************

Porter ran interference with the guard at Riker’s who tried to keep Rafe from hugging his little sister. He felt responsible for his friend being in prison for a crime she didn’t commit, and he wasn’t about to deny her the small comfort of a hug from her brother.  

“You all right, Snot-rocket?”  Rafe asked, sitting down next to Frankie.  

“Y-yeah,” Frankie stuttered, trying desperately not to cry.  

Rafe pulled her head to his shoulder, and Porter signaled to the guard to let them be.  

“Everybody sends their love. They’re pissed at you for tellin’ ‘em not to come, but they get it.”

“I can’t-“

“They know.  They treatin’ you OK in here?”

“Yeah.  It’s fine.  My lawyer knows some of the guards, and she has some clients in here, so…”

“Can’t say I’m too impressed with a lawyer whose clients are in prison.”

Frankie gave the tiniest laugh, then sniffled.  “She’s good. She’ll get me out of here.”

“Yeah, she will.  And if she don’t, me n’ the guys’ll stage a jailbreak.  Always wanted to do that.”  

“Don’t even joke about that in here,” Frankie told him.

“Ain’t jokin’.  So listen, Porter only got us five minutes, so I don’t wanna waste it.  Just… you need anything?  You need me to do anything?”

“No, there’s nothing. Dean gave you the keys to my apartment?”

“Yeah.  I’ll take care of it for you until you get home.  You just hang in, all right?  Porter’s gonna find that kid.  I met your team at SVU, and they seem like they got their shit together.  We got you, OK?”

“OK.”

“By the way, I’m gonna marry that Amanda.”

“She’s way too good for a snot-rocket like you.  But you go ahead and try.”    

 ********************

Things started to get strange about eight O’Clock the next morning.  Peter Stone got a call in his office.  Based on an anonymous tip, Detectives Carisi and Tutuola had picked up Juwon Jefferson and had him in custody.  And he was talking.  

He was a different kid than Stone had seen on the tapes of his first interrogation.  For one thing, he was a mass of bruises and cuts.  For another, he was giving them real information. The attitude was still on full display, and he was definitely not happy to be there.  But at least they had him, and for whatever reason, he was ready to tell them everything he knew about Alan Canady.  In part, Stone believed his story that Canady had been a truly evil son of a bitch, and now that he was dead, Juwon could safely say so.  But there was no way that was the whole story.  

“Yeah, man, I tol’ the Doc to go see the motherfucker, gave her the message he was gonna barbecue her boyfriend if she didn’t show up.  Ain’t nothin’ illegal ‘bout that.  I just delivered a message.”

“Did he pay you?”  Stone asked.

“Yeah, man, you think I play messenger boy for my health?”  

“Why did he want to see Dr. Rojas?”

“He said he was gonna fuck her up.  Said he was gonna do hisself, make it look like she done it.  Guess that’s pretty much what he done, ain’t it?  That’s bad-ass, man.  Stabbin’ yo’self.  That’s cold.”

Stone rolled his eyes. This was all way too convenient. Out of the blue, they get an anonymous tip and this kid who hadn’t cooperated at all is suddenly telling them the exact same wildly implausible story the suspect told?  And he just happened to be covered with injuries?  No.  Somebody got to this kid, and he was either getting something huge out of this, or they had something big over him.  Either way, Stone wasn’t about to let Rojas walk on the word of this little tweaker alone.

“Why should I believe you?” Stone asked, looking hard at the kid.

“I don’t give a shit if you believe me.  It’s that rich bitch doctor sittin’ in Rikers, not me.”

The kid had talked quite a bit about Alan Canady’s rapes of the three women.  That, at least, they could prove.  The kid’s evidence gave them probable cause to test Canady’s DNA against the rape kits, which was being done right that moment.  Stone thought blackly that it wasn’t like it was hard to collect Canady’s DNA - it was pooled all over the floor in that cheap motel room. But that still didn’t prove who had killed Canady, and it didn’t answer why this kid was suddenly in custody and talking.  Stone was suspicious of anything this neat and easy.

 ****************

Later that day, Stone stopped by Barba’s office.  Barba was sitting at his desk, tapping a pen and staring off into space.  

“Thinking deep legal thoughts?”  Stone grinned.

“Shallow ones, anyway. What can I do for you?”

“I wanna talk about this Rojas case.”

Barba frowned.  “You can’t talk to me about that case.”

“Not about the case itself, just…  Hypothetically, what would you say if you had a case with a very hard to find, reluctant, unreliable witness, who suddenly gets found by an ‘anonymous source’ and starts singing like a canary?”  Stone made himself comfortable in one of the chairs in front of Barba’s desk.

“I’d smell a rat. Especially if this suddenly cooperative witness is a junkie.”

“He is. Hypothetically.”

“Hypothetically. Look, I’m in an impossible spot here. You know that.  I know Francisca Rojas didn’t kill Alan Canady.”

“You don’t know that, and neither does anyone else except Canady.  And he’s not talking.”

“I have instincts, same as you.  And I know this woman.”

“You’ve known this woman for a whole month.  And you’re fucking her.  Tends to mess with the instincts, Barba.”

Rafael shot Stone an irritated look and gave a snort of annoyance.  “What, exactly, do you want from me here?  There’s no way she did it.  I know that.  But if you’re asking me whether you can believe this tweaker’s sudden conversion to the light, I’d say no.  So you get all the information you can out of him, and you check it all out, and you prove she didn’t do it with that evidence.”

“What the hell’s happened to everyone around here?  Since when are we in the business of proving someone didn’t do a crime?”  Stone snapped.

“Since always.  We prove the truth, not just what we want to be true.  That’s why I’m saying don’t buy the tweaker’s story.  I’d like Franci-  Dr. Rojas out of Riker’s today.  But you have a job to do, and that means you need to be right.”

“Thanks for nothing,” Stone smirked, getting up.  

“That’s what I’m here for. Get her out.  Soon.  But do it the right way.”

Rafael was troubled.  The tweaker was back and now he was talking? What had she done?  Or what had been done on her behalf?  

 **********

The DNA matched.  Alan Canady was the Pattern 20 rapist. Unfortunately, that didn’t prove who had killed him.  Nothing did. The autopsy was consistent with either Canady stabbing himself or someone else stabbing him; it was inconclusive either way.  And both his fingerprints and Frankie Rojas’s were on the knife.  True, Canady had no defensive wounds, but she could simply have gotten a lucky shot before he realized what was happening.  Because Barba’s building had no security cameras, there was no way to prove that Canady or Jefferson had somehow gotten in and stolen the knife.  From an evidence standpoint, that meant it was equally likely that either Frankie had killed Canady, or he had done it himself.  

In the end, the Manhattan DA’s office had no choice but to drop the charges against Frankie Rojas.  With the tweaker kid’s testimony, there was simply too much reasonable doubt for Nikki Staines to work with.  Nikki had actually been in the office the day the decision was made, raising holy hell and making Peter Stone’s life miserable.  Stone wasn’t happy about any of it – he felt like they had been played by someone who had gotten to the tweaker kid, but he couldn’t prove it, and he had other cases he could prove.  So they dropped the charges and Nikki blew up the phones at Riker’s as she drove out to collect her client, making sure they would have her processed out and ready when Nikki arrived.  

She called Dean Porter from her car.  “You heard?”

“Yeah.  Can I go pick her up?”

“I’m on my way now. But listen.  I’m never gonna look a gift horse in the mouth, but Stone thinks he got played, and I can’t blame him.  Is there anything I should know about that Jefferson kid?  It does seem like he had a pretty sudden, and violent, change of heart.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you don’t. I just want to know I’m not gonna get any surprises, and my client isn’t either.”

“You won’t.  I swear to you, Nikki, it’s all above board.  The kid was telling the truth.”

“Yeah, but why was he telling the truth?”

“You know what?  Take the win.  It’s all good.”

“It better be.  You got a lot to lose these days.”

“Yeah, life is good. And I wouldn’t jeopardize that. We didn’t do anything to the tweaker kid that’s gonna hurt us.  Or you. Or Frankie.”

“You didn’t, huh? Then who’s ‘we’?”

“Did I say ‘we’?  I meant ‘I’.  Hey, Nikki, my other line is ringing.  I gotta answer that.  Nice working with you.”

***************

Frankie was pretty sure she was being set up.  She didn’t really like it, given what she’d just been through, but it was hard to find a basis to complain.  Her brother and Amanda had become very… close, and were both claiming that, since he was planning to fly back to Austin in the morning, it was their last opportunity to spend time together.  So, as badly as they felt about it – yeah, sure, she thought – they wondered whether Frankie would mind spending one more night at Barba’s.  Besides which, all her things were at Barba’s.  And they claimed already to have set it up with him.  

Frankie dimly felt that it was bizarre for people who loved her to be worrying about romance, their own or hers, after she had just been in prison for murder.  But she was exhausted.  She’d barely eaten or slept in the five days since her arrest, and she’d been in an emotional spin-cycle the entire time.  The truth was, she wanted two things.  She wanted to take a shower for about a week, followed by a soak in a bathtub for a month.  And she wanted Barba.  

She hadn’t spoken to him since her arrest.  He’d retained Nikki for her, and she’d had messages from him through Porter, but that had been all he could do.  Now that she was about to see him again, she was in a turmoil of different emotions.  She felt physically hideous and soiled, and she felt emotionally battered and horribly ashamed.  She thought she was far too needy to be going to stay with a man she knew as little as she knew Barba.  But, apparently, she was the only one who felt that way, because he was waiting for her when Nikki pulled up at the curb in front of his building.

He looked absolutely delectable to her.  Gorgeous and kind and caring and opening his arms to her before she was all the way out of the car, even though all she had to wear home was the terrible sweats they’d given her at the M.E.’s office when they’d taken her bloody clothes.  Nikki smiled broadly at Rafael as he moved to push the car door closed, cradling Frankie in his arms.  

“Thank you,” he mouthed.

“My pleasure,” she replied, waving.  She liked the idea of Barba owing her one.

Rafael gently guided Frankie through the door to the lobby, and held her while they waited for the elevator.  

“Thank you for letting me stay with you,” she mumbled into his shirt.  She hadn’t looked at him, really, as she’d climbed out of Nikki’s car, just put her arms around him and buried her face in his chest.  

“I would have come to your place, if you hadn’t come here.  Even with your brother there.  I want to help.  I’ve felt so fucking useless these past days…”

She squeezed him, hard. “You called Nikki.  You shouldn’t even have done that.  That was everything.”

“I know you didn’t kill him, Francisca.”

“No, you don’t.  No one does, except me and him.  But I didn’t.  I swear it.”

“Still arguing with me…” he said with a grin, as he led her into the elevator, still with her arms clasped to him and her face buried. He wasn’t sure what to make of that. It was wonderful to have her in his arms again, to be able to comfort her as he’d been aching to for days.  But the way she was clinging to him spoke of a depth of fear and anguish that he’d only guessed at.  He was intensely grateful she had come to him so that he could help her through it.  He was honored that his fresa, usually so dauntless and fiery, and now so crushed and wounded, would allow herself to be this vulnerable with him.  He vaguely realized that he would do anything for this woman in his arms, but he paid little attention to the thought, as he thought about what he could do to help her begin to recover from her ordeal.

She released him from her arms when he closed the door behind them, but stayed right next to him.

“I’m guessing you’d like the longest, hottest shower in the history of the world,” he suggested.  

“I’d give my left arm for that,” she sighed softly.

“No charge for guests. You go get in the shower, and I’ll bring you a drink.”

“Do you happen to have any scotch?”

Rafael couldn’t help but laugh at that.  Everyone knew about Rafael Barba and scotch.  He was a little amused by this evidence that they really hadn’t known each other that long.  “I have scotch.”

When he had poured a scotch for each of them, he hesitated outside the door to his bathroom for a moment. He could hear the water running, and see billows of steam floating lazily into the bedroom.  But he was suddenly unsure what she was expecting. Did she want privacy?  Should he wait for her to come out?  Well, he’d told her he was going to bring her a drink.  Besides, he realized, the steam was escaping into the bedroom because she had left the door ajar.  He knocked tentatively and pushed the door open a little.

“Francisca?  I brought your drink.”  

She didn’t respond. He noticed the sweatshirt and pants she’d been wearing wadded up on the floor.

“What do you want me to do with these sweats?”

It took her a second to answer.  “Bonfire,” she finally said in a choked voice.  

He was sure he heard a sob. He didn’t hesitate, but stepped into the room, set his drink on the counter, and pulled the shower curtain back just enough to see her.  Her hands were splayed on the tile wall and she was leaning on both arms, head hanging, crying hard and trying to be silent about it.

“Oh, mi fresa,” he said, pulling the curtain back and stepping, fully clothed, into the shower to take her into his arms.  She instantly let out a groan of agony, turning into him and clinging to him as she sobbed into his shoulder.  He held her drink just outside the spray of the shower.  

For long minutes, he just held her and let her cry, while the hot water cascaded down and soothed her. He didn’t realize he had begun to hum softly to her until she turned her face into his neck, muttering, “That’s nice.”

When she seemed to be done crying, he moved them a bit to the side and held the glass to her.  “Here, drink this,” he said softly, not letting go of her.  She downed its contents in one gulp and handed it back to him.  He smiled.  

When he felt her arms loosen around him, he reached behind her and set the glass down on the shower’s built-in tile shelf.  He took a bottle of shampoo and poured a little into his hand.  Moving her just a bit backward out of the spray, he began to shampoo her hair.  She closed her eyes and tilted her head back, the slightest smile touching her lips. When he was done, he moved her under the spray to rinse her hair and began to soap her body.  He tried not to make it sexual, given the situation and the fact that he was still wearing all of his now-soaked clothes.  But it wasn’t easy.  He wasn’t sure, but it seemed like she moved into his hands from time to time. He conditioned her hair when he’d finished washing her, and moved her once again under the spray to rinse out the conditioner.  

“MMmmmmmm,” she said. “This feels so nice.”

“That’s the point,” he said, leaning down without thinking and kissing her.  

He was just preparing to be concerned about pushing her when she reached to put a hand behind his head and wind her fingers in his wet hair, pulling his mouth harder on hers.  After thoroughly kissing him, she looked into his eyes for the first time since she’d arrived.  

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.  And I mean that in a number of different ways. I like having you here, and I’m here for you.”

“I know,” she said.  “Can we take a bath?”

“Of course we can.”

“And… will you please take your clothes off?  I don’t care what you do when you’re alone, but I refuse to take a bath with a clothed man.”

Rafael put his forehead to Frankie’s.  “No, I won’t take them off.  But you’re welcome to, if you want.”

“Oh, you’re a pain in the ass, Barba.”  She kissed him again and began undressing him.  

When she had his clothes off, he quickly washed his hair and turned the dial that turned off the shower and began to fill the tub.  Pulling back the curtain, he picked up the pile of wet clothes and wrung them out as best he could, then tossed them across the bathroom into the sink to be dealt with later.  

“You get comfortable.” He said.  “I’ll be right back.”

Rafael quickly padded out to his kitchen and retrieved the bottle of scotch, bringing it to the bathroom and setting it down next to the tub where Frankie was pouring some shampoo under the water to make bubbles.  He took his glass from the counter, lifted hers from the shelf in the shower, and put them on the edge of the bathtub, then stepped into the water. She moved to let him get seated behind her, then scooted between his legs and relaxed against his chest. 

He poured some scotch into her glass and handed it to her, then picked up his own.  He wrapped one arm around her and she held his arm with hers. They sat in the rapidly-filling tub and sipped in silence.  

When the tub was full, Frankie used her foot to turn off the water and turned herself so that she was lying on her side, her cheek on his chest, and could put both arms around him.

“I love you,” she murmured, eyes closed and smiling.  

Rafael kissed the top of her head, wondering whether she could possibly have meant what she’d just said. She lay quietly, seemingly perfectly satisfied with no response other than a kiss.  She’d had two drinks – he had only poured a couple of fingers each time, but he had no idea when the last time she’d slept or eaten was, and for all he knew, she was asleep right this second.  Maybe she didn’t even know she’d said it.  He decided that’s what it was.  His chest felt warm anyway, and it wasn’t just because of the scotch.  

He thought he dozed a little, lying there holding her in the hot, bubbly water.  He was gently nudged back into consciousness when she shifted between his legs and mumbled, “It’s getting cold.”

“You want to put in some more hot water?”

“Mmmmmm, I want to be in bed.  I don’t want to get out of this tub and move to the bed.  I just want to be in bed without that part.”

“I’d like to do that for you, mi fresa, but I don’t think I possess that particular skill.”

She inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled.  “OK, we’ll do it the hard way.”

They helped each other to stand and climb out of the tub, and Rafael wrapped Frankie in a deliciously large, fluffy towel.  She was too sleepy to comment, but she made a mental note to compliment him on his taste in towels – and scotch – in the morning.  Neither bothered much with their hair – Rafael just toweled his off and Frankie twisted hers into a quick bun on top of her head.  They quickly brushed their teeth, leaning on one another, and were cuddled together in bed very soon thereafter, arms around one another and her head cradled on his shoulder.  

In the soft light coming through the window, Frankie looked up at Rafael.  She lifted her lips to kiss his jaw and he turned his head to take her lips between his.  He was a bit surprised when she subtly shifted her body and opened her mouth to his, sliding her hand down his side to his hip and thigh, angling her caress until she was softly cupping him in her hand.  

“Barba?”

“Hmmmm?”

“Will you please make love to me?”

“Anything for you.”

He followed her lead, going slowly and touching her softly, never taking his mouth from hers, even when whispering endearments and praise.  Her soft moan as she came with him inside her was pure enchantment, and he was almost positive it contained a whispered, “I love you.”

#law & order svu #law & order: special victims unit #rafael barba #raul esparza #peter stone #Law & Order Nikki Staines #law & order SVU Agent Dean Porter

[crazytvaddict]

Teen mom 2 reunion part 1!

Well Holy Shit was that a reunion! I expected there to be a little more drama I'm not gonna lie. Don't get me wrong there was so much drama already, but like for real I don't know after the week prior having so much shit go down. I guess part of me was expecting a little more. We relived that drama of Bri’s crazy fight oh did we and Kail’s part in it too yes. 

Before we get into it I just want to say I liked how this year for the reunion they added Nessa who usually hosts after shows and unseen moment stuff. I love how she hosted and asked questions with Dr.Drew. I think it added another perspective that isn't actually a therapist standpoint. 

anyways let’s get onto my thoughts on this special. 

Briana 

First off Dr.Drew starts with talking to Bri and Brittany. They discussed the fight that just happened and the encounters that happened that day at the reunion between Bri and Kail. This part was a little pathetic. Bri told the side of her story that really made her look good. She acted like the victim, but then claimed that Kail was acting like the victim. Bri claimed that Kail just went there to fight her. No No no. Bri if your gonna til maybe tell what actually happened because we all saw it on tv and we all know what happened. We all know that Kail wanted to talk to Bri about why she felt comfortable talking about her kids and her ex. Kail maybe wanted to fight Bri after the fact, but thats bound to happen. 

On a side night I just want to say I like how we saw more of what happened in the part where the fight went down. We say more of what happened. like we saw Jo talking. We also saw Chelsea say that she's leaving. I don't blame her after her reservations of being afraid that a fight would go down. 

anyways back to Bri. She also discussed her kids and her relationship with Javi. She talked Devon and her concerns with him. Brittany made some great points to her sister. She also discussed how Louis went back to Ny and he's not involved in his daughters life at all. I feel bad for Bri in this sense because nobody wants to see their daughters live life with no dad. it’s sad. 

Devon also talked to Drew and Nessa. He mainly talked a bunch of bullshit. I don't really think theres much to discuss. 

Kail 

The remainder of the show was mostly talking to Kail. Drew and Nessa sat down with Kail. Once again they talked the fight that happened earlier that day. Kail talked her problems with Bri. She dressed how she thinks Bri and Javi dated for screen time which part of me agrees with. I feel like Bri was just dying to get into the spotlight without being in it for so long. I think she just was craving the attention or something. I think Bri and Javi were something that you saw, but it literally came out of nowhere. I think Kail is right they should of all sat down before they got involved. Just because there are kids involved. 

Kail also discussed her kids, love, and she talked smack, but that wouldn't be Kail if that didn't happen. 

Regarding the fight. I think it is big that Kail is like that fight shouldn't have happened. I think it’s big that when people suggested on twitter that she just pretend she's cool and then do a sneak attack and Kail said “Noooo, I’m passed that. We all, including myself took it too far.” She said how she was still heated in the moment but that is totally understandable. She said how she could be on stage with all her cast mates with no issues. 

I think going forward everyone should just make an effort to get through these reunions with no drama if minimal drama. There will still be drama, but maybe lets keep it to a minimum. 

lastly we end of with Barb. 

She talked about how Jace is doing her relationship now with Jenelle. She tries to be nice to Jenelle. It’s hard because Barb is her mom. What matter what shit they go through she is her mother. Barb isn't keep Jace away from Jenelle just to be mean or cruel she is genuinely worried for his wellbeing. She has to create as his legal guarding. one thing between barb and Jenelle that stood out to me this season is when Barb wanted to have lunch with Jenelle, but Jenelle declined saying she's busy all week and cant go. We all know that was just an excuse bc David doesn't want Jenelle to be near Barb. He wants to control her. I’m starting to believe that there could be some abuse in that relationship. I'm starting to think that clearly things are going wrong. it’s scary to be honest even just as a viewer. 

It makes you think what could happen next. 

That was it for reunion part 1... part 2 will air next Monday! In that episode we will hear from Chelsea,Leah, Kail & Javi, and Jenelle. oh the drama that is to come...

#teenmom2 #teenmom #chelsea #barb #jenelle #chelseahouskadebor #leah #kailyn lowry #kail #briana

[survivormagictreehouse]

Episode #3: “Like holy shit. I DID THAT!” -Birch

-Holy shit I did a thing!!! So this challenge was a little game of attack and defend. We found that an Uppercase i looks the same as a lowercase L (I vs l) sooo, I had to go cause my mom wanted the wifi off, so I sent 2 messages (which got me out) but I replaced an i with an L and why both defended themselves which got 2 people out (Timmy Z and Ali) left only Cindi, who promptly quit I think it was said that should couldn’t do the comp leading into tomorrow. So then my tribe won immunity. But like holy shit. I DID THAT!! I’m convinced my iconic shit only comes out when Lukas and Olivia host me. ILY both of them!!! I also got sent to the tree house. So now I have to chose what looks like a swap, music videos, and honestly idk what the last one is. It has to do with Alexander Graham Bell, or maybe a game of telephone? 

-Soooooo, I have to exile someone. I kinda feel like going from a weird standpoint I want to exile myself cause then I am safe, and I don’t have to worry about a challenge, but on the other hand I could keep myself in just incase there is the possibility of a swap, so I can help my tribe and exile someone else who I want to keep safe. But also trust can only go so far, and I have trust issues. If I exile myself I could fuck myself over. I’m also indecisive so this is fun. I need to look at the cast and think who is best to exile. Maybe someone I want to work with in the future. Keep them safe, and pray to the gods that I stay safe. 

-so... czern went without a hitch. he voted vi super randomly, so i kind of assume he was told he was going. but i truly do not care, he went home so im vibing. and then we had... that challenge. and immediately it was kind of clear we were losing JKLFDSA, it was kind of a disaster. we had an immmediate, early numbers disadvantage and that gave the Jack tribe wiggle room to try every trick in the book to psych us out. I was the first person to survive being jumped by them from my tribe (ilivedbitch.jpg), but also we tried SO much. Someone needs to call Nev, because the Annie tribe TRULY said time to catfish. We did the lowercase L thing, we tried EVERYTHING but it was a struggle. Credit to Birch for getting Me/Timmy out simultaneously, that was super impressive. But we are back at tribal AGAIN. and its starting to get dicey because... there isn't anyone i actually want to vote out on this tribe. Like I assume Dan is going to go this time, because he was gone FIRST in the challenge and is very quiet...? But then we are probably gonna swap at 16, which is scary because a) i don't want us to lose again and go into a swap with a MEGA numbers disadvantage b) who else am i gonna vote? timmy? it gets DICEY. so hopefully dan goes and we do an exile swap... because otherwise it gets tetchy. im getting sus with austin too, king is doing a lot and im gonna keep tabs on it. im also super afraid of the other tribe, that conglomerate of keegan/zach/birch is super scary to me. im gonna get bodied by a network of pre-existing connections and i am not looking forward to it

-https://youtu.be/Yzwlq1M7RzI

-https://youtu.be/taNWED3L7pM

We lost again. Dan really fucked up and he’s gotta go now since he’s messed up two out of two rounds we lost. Can’t really save him now

minding my business waking up to an alliance with some freaking cuties. me, zach, gavin and keegan??? i could get on board with that. lets not swap or do anything stupid to mess this up thank YOU.

hi nothing has happened and i would love to tell you more :/

Hello hello! After a busy few days I'm finally home and I've been having more chances to really get to know my tribemates better. Cindi is an absolute queen and we've talked about cooking and our siblings and I think we really vibe. Timmy and I talked a little strategy and he seems to really like me. Both of them aren't in my alliance soooo things might have to change sooner rather than later if we have to go to a third tribal. I've been talking a lot with Ali, Collin, and Austin too! Austin actually started asking me stuff about furries tonight, which I'm happy to talk about, but it is a little weird to be a representative of all furries LOL. I think as of now the best choice for me is to vote for Dan, I haven't really connected with him at all. I've been hearing his name from some others too. So for now my strategy is to play the social game and keep positive. I AM a former winner after all, even if I don't feel my win was too impressive, people will use that against me if I try to push an agenda this early on.

I think we are all voting for Dan but I haven’t been around much today and also... my DMs are a little dry! I’m trying to catch up with everyone right now though. I really like Cindi and wish I was in an alliance with her D: Also I cannot keep my eyes open at the moment. I’ve had a crazy few days and I’m just ready to sleep! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAO2hLWr9oI&feature=youtu.be

I don’t remember what the last confessional I made was. But we won the challenge thanks to some brilliant strategizing. And then CINDI just yeeted herself from the game. I now have an alliance with RACHAEL, ZACH and GAVIN. Which, in addition to my alliance of JESS and BIRCH, means I’m solid with 5 of the 8 other members in my tribe. Gotta love that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSZ1JG5VHgc&feature=youtu.be

Do I have any idea what is actually happening in this game. Absolutely not!! I need to pick up the pace and message more people and I know that is on me. I want to be here and play hard and will work better on doing so.

So this round, I made an official chat with Collin and Cindi. Good news is, that will help with idol hunt guessing and such. We already ruled out that dolphins is a no go, and a few other dead end paths. I also have the light advantage which I am super excited about but nervous on when to use. With the vote this round, i find out there is a 6 person alliance chat of everyone except for myself, cindi, and Dan. Unfortunately this round there is nothing we can do to turn that tide, but next round when it is 8 of us, we only need 1 person to flip over to cindi and I plus Collin (assuming we are both still here) to make that vote go through. I know Dan is voting for me this round and I will be voting for him. He is HORRIBLE in challenges. He has done the worst in all three of the challenges so far, and honestly its his time to go. He should have gone last round to be honest but for some reason the tribe wanted Czear or whatever. Hoping for the best tonight I guess.

https://youtu.be/xxvHRGygG0g

OKAY I THINK I AM NOT AS FUCKED AS PREVIOUSLY EXPECTED. Like, I'm not GOOOOOOD, but I do have people. Like, Austin does have my back and we're gonna do another easy vote but he is agreeing that after this easy vote if we don't swap we need to shake things up which I am 100% in agreement with. Like, I can not stay at the bottom. I am not a bottom. I don't do underdog stories. I am not an underdog. Well, I am right now but I DO NOT ENJOY IT. I like Timmy but he is paranoid and as someone who gets to paranoid I do not need it. Like, he is going before me if power structure does not shake up, so he has his place, but PLEASE STOP REMINDING ME THAT I AM FUCKED I KNOW JESUS I DON'T DO WELL WHEN I'M PARANOID SO I GOTTA STAY CALM.

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Click HERE to watch the Round 3 Cast Assessment!