#like i say that about a lot of shit but truly i fucking hate this fanbase

[toxifoxx]

truly at the end of the day its all about receiving validation

#<- was having a lot of fun drawing fat william till he stopped to think about what other people might think #<- very important that people like him just as much as i do #<- incredibly important (i love him so much and his character is so much more nuanced than the fandom ever gives him credit for #and he already gets shat on way too often by people who don't understand what they're talking about) #truly the amount of hate based around him being a murderer is insane. Brother he's not a real life murderer. he's not going to #come out of the screen and hurt you #I NEED PEOPLE TO AT LEAST LIKE HIM A LITTLE BIT *bursts into tears* #and i need validation #and getting people to simp for him and think oh hes hot 😳 is one of the easier and more entertaining ways to get nice comments #what i lack in skill and talent i can make up for in character design and suggestive subtext right? #ugh #i dunno it feels like the only way to get people to say sometjing nice about my art sometimes #don't get me wrong i adore drawing him slutty but. ougggghhhhhh #hope it doesnt sound like im implying he's less attractive if hes fat personally i think hes hot as fuck #its mostly about stupid ass conventionally attractive shit #and also that people get bullied for portraying him fat... That too #anyways #im normal again now #toxi.txt

[steelycunt]

ridi im sorry i need to rant and i think youll get it 😭 like not to be a bitch but this fandom kinda going off the rails and annoying the shit out of me https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRbYASpf/ everybody in the comments unironically loving it,,, i mean wtvr ship who you want but its kinda getting delusional like ppl are just operating on thin air and pretty fancasts atp and i do Not understand or emotionally connect with any of it. at least w wolfstar theres so much material and foundation to explore but what is all the rest of this?? just hot celebrity fancasts and crack. to be fair part of me respects taking a terfs canon material and making everybody gay but the way it seems to be so oversaturating fics and the fandom that characters dont even feel like their original selves .. atp its all just surface level OCs

hello! yes! i'll be honest talking about things like this always make me a little nervous, and i feel obligated to preface anything i say with a disclaimer that none of it really matters, nothing i say matters, and you should do what you like, because--who cares. i am not an authority on--anything, frankly. my opinion holds no more weight than the next guy's, and all i'm doing here is giving it, so. essentially what im saying is--people are perfectly entitled to disagree with me, but people are not entitled to be mean to me about it xx

having said that. it is my personal opinion that s x barty is one of the worst fucking things i have ever heard lol. who even is barty who is that guy. why would s be interested in him at all. i do not understand it it does not make sense to me. from where are we sourcing the character traits and personality that we are giving barty that would ever endear sirius to him, because it objectively cannot be canon.

overall i do not get the new interest in barty + evan + pandora (+ regulus, but we won't go there)...at all, other than guessing that people were bored with the marauders and wanted a new version of them (and new celebrities to fancast) while simultaneously changing next to nothing about them other than superimposing them onto the first slytherin side characters they could rustle up. i expect ive become a bit of a broken record in regards to my dislike of the popular meow-meow-ification + complete absolution of regulus as a character in order to make him a loveable oc (just as i think erasing all the negative traits that r/s have in order to make them more likeable is just as boring), and all of that applies to those other guys as well (with the slight difference that they are, somehow, even less interesting and significant than regulus in canon), so i won't get into that too much. but i think what you say about having no emotional connection to any of it is exactly right lol--it is a sort of shift? i guess? in the fandom that is simply of no interest to me. they are characters that i just have no emotional investment in and admittedly struggle a little to understand why other people do. i am emotionally invested in, like, five characters overall (and even out of those--there's only two i'm really here for innit xx) and i personally cannot extend that investment to a creepy little side character who is mentioned maybe twice in the entire series.

and that is okay! i do not need to understand it. i don't want to say it annoys me because honestly--i don't go there, its nothing to do with me. if i dont like it i just wont interact with it, and the fact that it doesn't interest me has no bearing on what other people are into or want to do, and i couldn't give less of a shit what people do with the canon material, which is largely garbage anyway. take the bits you want from it, play around with those and ignore the rest. in that respect we are all doing exactly the same thing. but yeah i think s x barty is genuinely awful lol. hate it. very terrible. he's already got a loser werewolf boyfriend and he loves him so so much. leave him alone.

#i know most people are reasonable and thus it is perhaps overly cautious of me to insist on shrouding my unpopular #opinions in like. layer upon layer of placatory disclaimers but. well im a rather anxious guy i can't help it xx but im going to use these #tags to have a bit more of a consequence-less hater hour so. if you like regulus or barty or any of that lot i suggest you look away now #because i am about to express opinions about them that you probably wouldnt agree with + wouldnt enjoy reading!! #like full warning what im about to do is NOT any sort of analysis or defence of my opinion i will just be hating on them. is that clear. #okay. having said that. hater hour. barty and evan and honestly regulus were all cunts? like they were terrible people why do we care #about them now. regulus interests me solely as a piece of context for sirius' character. i could not give less of a shit about him as a #person in his own right. which leads me to my next hater moment: why oh why oh WHY on earth would canon james potter be interested #in canon regulus black. it makes sense in like a muggle au where they are virtually completely different characters but canon? #why would he be attracted to him. there is nothing. there is no chemistry i am ASLEEP and so is james. he would not give that #guy a second look. like it just baffles me it truly does. i feel like you have to bend over backwards to create a situation in which #james potter would ever show an interest in regulus. and i know jegulus is a fucking force to be reckoned with nowadays but god i just #do not like that ship. also i think the fact that barty and pandora and evan are essentially just oc characters who have been coloured #in by general fanon consensus shows in that what they have become is just. not interesting or complex or well fleshed out lol. like #idk i feel like they are just. very shallow. deliberately. so they are easy to like and easy to ship because that is what theyre there for. #god it feels so good to say all this. i will never be a hater again (<- lying) but i needed to be able to just. say this just once xx #also if you needed any more indication what barty and evan and regulus are here to do you just have to look at their #super-hot super-conventionally attractive celebrity model fancasts. like it all adds up its like but what if these death eaters were #not actually evil :-( what if they were really sweet and also? so so hot. like they were all so hot and actually really good #and none of them meant to be evil they didnt want to be :-( they were just hot good guys all in love with each other and the evil stuff #they did wasnt their fault :-( like that has to be. the most boring thing you couldve possibly done with these blank slates. surely. #anyway. im done now but i enjoyed hater hour immensely this was so fucking good for my soul xx thanks and goodnight xx #anon #telegram #scream hang on sorry. just looked at the comments of that tiktok where people are saying they were prison besties. girl. girl. #girl they were in prison for very different reasons baby. baby you know that right. baby look at me. look at me

[sharlmbracta]

so maybe the point of living is of the one reason to live instead of the other reasons not to

#this is not a suicide post #just thinking stuffs #but like i don't really wanna glorify “living” as in “living is so great life is all beautiful :)” as well #especially when reality is like Right There. war still happening. genocide still happening. all sorts of fucked up oppression misinfo #chronic suffering generational poverty still happening. not even getting started on hate crimes shootings and the government #actively giving Not A Care as people literally die out all around. yet the same faces say “don't kill urself <3” or maybe not. #but the media does and they probably do be like that to save face #them + a lot of people act like they know shit outside their living environment when they Do Not Actually Know Shit #probably myself included #and think that they're Always Somehow Right #+ the inherently wealthier you are the inherently ignorant you are about needs that People Do Actually Fucking Need #and having really no idea how much resources are actually given to the people #because they don't know what it truly means to live just to survive #just because they were luckier to be born in a wealthier/supportive/resourceful environment #which is not a fucking choice you can make but i don't think they ever 'really' understood that #still the media screaming of supporting equity and diverseness even now #so in that sense i guess #the world is built on lies :) #eh #cw rant #cw depression #or something #not really #ok kinda

[0tul1ss]

.

#mannn i literally assumed he ghosted-- why on earth would he text me after so long???? #i was fully like 'ok the last msg i sent literally makes me cringe a bit to read but its been months so ig im never opening the convo again #it was simpler before when there felt like there was nothing else to do and easier to move on. i even had a little crush on someone else ! #now i have a whole wheel of decisions to choose from #and idek what i truly want from this guy anymore bc even just platonically he kinda fucked it up like. idk #or rather i want a lot of different things and idk what to choose #i want my friend back. i want to never see him again. i want him to know every truth of what ive felt and i want him to know none of it #i want him to miss me or maybe wonder about me sometimes down the line. i want him to not spare me another thought for the rest of his life #i want to reply only 'go fuck yourself' and i want to write him a letter and i want to ghost him better than he ghosted me #i want to tell him i love him and i want to tell him i hate him and i want to say nothing at all #i want the closure i was denied. i want to protect the closure i now have #<-going insane #anyway its soooo stupid like i already grieved for this shit bro. i accepted the end of this years long close friendship #anyway idk why im doing so much processing of this in a vent post nor do i know why i always feel compelled to post these when i do #good thing i keep a small presence on here lol. but yea uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh send post #ok wait i saved this as a draft and went to go look for what i had been tagging vent posts with #[couldnt find one i had been using consistently even tho the whole point is so ppl can blacklist it if they want whoops!!] #and i saw another vent from another time he just kinda disappeared on me #and while this time was a lot worse for a lot of reasons i think its important to say this-- #that the last thing that i want is to go back to square one of this stupid awful cycle #vent

[gen-is-gone]

Legit getting so *fucking* annoyed by this fic and its literally insulting level of mischaracterization of so fucking much bc the writer has time to write 150k+ words of fanfic in a month but apparently no time to so much as glance at a wiki for basic plot and character details, let alone read the damn comics, but now I'm 150k+ words committed and I am still genuinely interested to see how it ends but oh my fucking god would you just stick to hob gadling's jaunt thru the centuries and stop writing the Endless if you're gonna fuck up basic shit this badly and also mischaracterize actually important characters so badly that it is, again, literally fucking insulting to the original story??

#still vaguing #bc however irritated I am I am not so gouache and rude as to say this to them #and y'know clearly it's a labor of profound love and fandom is for everybody etc #but it's just also absolutely hitting critical mass among show only fans #and it's convincing ppl to watch the show who are then basically only watching for this one minor character #and fine whatever ppl can like whatever the fuck they like but #seriously it's so fucking insulting to only give a fuck about a character who is barely in it #fuck the monkey's paw of me wanting other ppl to appreciate hob gadling #has been slash fandom not only totally mowing over both his and dream's actually personalities for the sake of shipping tropes #but also mowing over the fucking plot of sandman in its entirety for the sake of shipping #ugh I *like* hob I like him a lot #but this really genuinely fucking sucks #and again it would be fine if this person wasn't rapidly achieving bnf status of the #'arbiter of fanon agreed-upon meta and characterization' level #while being flat fucking wrong about so much shit with truly embarrassing amounts of confidence #fuuuck I hate being mean I hate feeling like a grouch about how other ppl do fandom #I assure anyone listening that normally i am the monarch of live and let live don't give a shit #but sandman is where I hit my limit after 15+ years in fandom I guess #megan whines into the empty abyss of cyberspace

[strwbrymlkshake]

im the sleepiest guy in the world rn gn yangang I will talk to you tomorrow <3

#mine #i rarely ever do nightly or morningly posts bc i feel like theyre redundant for me but this is an excuse to talk in tags lol #WELL um i have a lot to do tomorrow and thats gonna be annoying bc as you can see it is the time it is rn. #ive been up doing my thing. feeling a lil funky and invested in my superiority complex yet again #would u guys still like me if i devoted time everyday to scaring people i hate :( well you guys probably just like to watch me be insane so #i totally wanna post all the gory details about my evil excursions but im so paranoid. hot boy shit #well the most i can say is ive been getting a kick out of horrendous deeds lately. which is weird bc mentally ive been BETTER #like im morally responsible and everything but i still harass people i despise for personsl fulfillment. whats up with that. #i never forget what they did to me ^_^ and the good part is im playing nice with them so they think its over. and im not a suspect #but theres just such a surplus of people who want to harass them that im ruled out entirely its so fucking funny #also thank you people who want them dead too and sometimes harass them instead of me i love uu<3 my besties fr #🪳 #i commit truly horrible acts to satiate the bottomless pit inside of me <3 but only to people who deserve it #im coherent im not doing this out of raw emotion. im devoted to it. im determined to step on her and watch her die #to any frightened readers . #im normal about like everyone else i promise its just a handful of people i would slaughter on sight #well anyways i think my malice is satisfied for tonight gn<3<3<3 #also im dreaming of the day where i find a nice malicious husbsnd and we can terrorize people together. romance at its finest #i take pride in the fact i actually do the shit everyone thinks of doing. i want to know what would happen. like a scientist #im craving this awesome breakfast place by my house anon im taking u there sometime to treat you. wait this isnt the ask post. hell

[gayfishermanfive]

part of me wishes i could just mass delete all my dbh posts, and another part of me is reminding me i still have cursed connor stuck to my wall

#jump speaks #i just want to be done with that fandom yknow? #don't wanna think about it #i unfollowed most dbh blogs i used to follow #so now my dash is purely tua and occasionally toh #i just want to forget about the dbh fandom existence #like man.. i hate that fandom #i truly feel sorry for markus and kara fans #the crackship between a racist piece of shit and a connor recolor have more content than them like #fucking ouch #says a lot tho 😌

[vvanessaives]

i've been loving playing the prologue with fenix bc every time there's an interaction with jackie all i can think about is "you two would hate each other so much"

#rena.txt #actually confirmed by yours truly that they hate each other bc fenix hated hearing about him from vesper every single time and if they #happened to be in the same room fenix wouldn't pass the chance to start a fight. he's just like that he's an asshole we can't stop him <3 #actually double confirmed by yours truly bc i have a fic where after the heist and shit and stuff fenix shows up to ves after hearing about #well everything. that she's dying and so on. he showed up to?? show support?? in his way or more like he just wanted to hear everything #from ves bc he was too shocked and couldn't read his own emotions about it. but i'm digressing. he showed up said a really mean thing about #jackie's death and went anyways... see ya. AKCJSKCDNLD #and he was just plain lucky vesper was beaten up or she would've beaten him herself. they had a fight ofc <3 he came back 3 days after and #had another fight but in the end they kinda fixed it more like ves was too tired of him she went u know what i shouldn't expect anything #else from u fuck off and go away. and he sure went and then after other 4 days of pain they fixed it completely i say fixed bc the only way #to deal with fenix is accepting that he will never change. it's a take it or leave it so it's not exactly fixed more like i'm ignoring it #anyways having fun :)) don't ask me about the way i've restarted the game without finishing it. i'll get to it when i'm normal again :)) #ACTUALLY let me specify that fenix usually loves to piss off a lot of ppl but with jackie is like pure hostility this man really hates him #and i have the reasons but this post already got too long

[yther]

I would like to retire from having a body... maybe just a sabbatical. But for now I am an amorphous (non)figure.

I want to sleep. I want to want to eat regularly. I want to have energy to clean and organize my life....or hope for a life in a future.

I don't want to fight to survive. (But if that's not my choice, so be it.) No one would be doing any better than I am in this sadistic and totally contrived Saw-"situation", y'all can fuck off about it with the judgement. Sincerely (to weirdo stalkers)!

You don't give me peace, which is fine since I can make my own. :' D (I can make peace with LOTS of things, mmmm forgiveness extends from self to others, it's amazing u should learn about it. )

so I'm gonna eat some of my birthday cake nom nom nom

#woe for thee #that'll be all for me - however #sit in it and rot #I am a beautiful person fight me abt it #I believe in love greater than “love” - again Fight Me about it! #my health is shit Let me laugh at you about it you ridiculous fools #regardless of the obstacles I work hard every fucking day and I'm not a waste of space or oxygen #I am a good fucking person #who swears a lot and isn't perfect but LOLOLOL #real humans have never treated me like this and your wrath is weakness #I would know - since going full tilt is lack of restraint #even measured vitriol is a fucking disease - eat your heart and choke on the bile you pump instead of blood #if you hate me for who I truly am sorry not sorry but you're a piece of dog shit! I wouldn't let u kiss my asshole so can't say eat my ass

[musical-chick-13]

.

#personal rant in tags #(because I NEED to get shit off my chest and I might as well put it here) #I HATE. /HATE/. how much stock we (as a society) put into how people look #I hate that there's bias in EVERYTHING toward people who naturally seem closer to some arbitrary standard of attractiveness #I hate how people are judged by their bodies and literally not anything else #I hate that I'm expected to completely overhaul my appearance and keep doing that day after day after day to be seen as worthy of #respect and support. I hate how many times I've been interested in someone only for people around me to say 'oh but they're not #hot why do you like them?' I hate how the only time someone has ever outright expressed interest in me is when I looked like someone else #I hate how I'm not the only person who has experienced this that I know SO many instances of this #AM I NOT WORTHY OF RESPECT JUST BY VIRTUE OF BEING A HUMAN? ARE WE NOT ALL DESERVING OF LOVE AND SUPPORT BECAUSE WE ARE ALIVE??? #GENUINELY I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. YOUR OUTWARD APPEARANCE HAS /NOTHING/ TO DO WITH WHO YOU ARE AS A PERSON #IT DOESN'T INDICATE ANYTHING ABOUT HOW KIND OR UNDERSTANDING YOU ARE. WHAT YOUR INTERESTS ARE. WHAT YOU VALUE. HOW YOU SPEND YOUR TIME. #like...obviously I'm not perfect and I've still gotta de-internalize some stuff too! #but sometimes it feels like everyone is just so SHALLOW and JESUS fucking CHRIST am I /TIRED/ #I have never been '''pretty''' I will never BE '''pretty''' WHY DOES THAT BOTHER PEOPLE SO MUCH???!! #like genuinely just. it's one of the (many) things that has driven a wedge between me and my mom. it's made dating almost impossible. #it made a career in stage acting so much harder than it already was. truly it has put me at some sort of disconnect with a lot of humanity #AND I'M SORRY BUT THAT IS SO FUCKING /STUPID/ IT SHOULDN'T BE LIKE THIS WHY AM I BEING JUDGED ON THESE GROUNDS #*sigh* this was another reason why letting go of Her™ was so hard tbh. she didn't care what anyone looked like not even me #she made me feel beautiful because she genuinely liked who I was as a person. the one time I had this and look where we ended up lmao #...god this not-relationship really fucked me up didn't it sometimes I forget how much everything hurt me and how far back I set myself #because of it #ANYWAY we're probably not gonna sleep tonight :) #In the Vents

[snekdood]

i kinda feel like so long as someone like me isn’t accepted as a part of the queer community that none of us will ever be able to work together for our rights

#so long as im not 'good enough'. in whatever way that means to you. im p sure none of us will be accepted lol #idk what it is about me. im too mentally ill? too taboo? too outspoken about my beliefs?? #i dont feel like i operate really a whole lot different than other people on here i just have different interests and shit idk #but like. bc im such a low hanging fruit. bc im so easy to demonize. bc i look like a disney villain lol . as long as im not accepted #in all my sexy devilish ways #idk if any of us will. #idc if you think i give queer people a bad look bc of how much i embrace the things conservatives hate about us #bc like this is just me dude. im just being myself up here. sure i do a lil jokey trickstery stuff here n there but yknow #idk what ppl want from me. truly #like seriously if anyone can let me know what i did that was so wrong. id love to know #bc rn my suspicion is its just the terfs who are malding. but could be my abuser too. idk #they have way less people on their side though than like terfs do on the whole so thats why im leaning more toward it being the terfs #considering they have a whole. terf army apparently lol. #im not saying its just me but when yall decide certain people arent good enough or dont fit your hashtag aesthetic enough to be #part of the community then we're always going to lose. you cant just decide for queer people whether or not they have a place in thel #community. bc if you can just pick and choose who you want to be in it then its not even a community anymore or a movement or anything #its literally just a fucking clique and theres no way clique behavior is ever gonna inspire anyone to want to support us #and thats #aside from setting up a hierarchy of whats desireable in a person and what makes them Good Enough to be in the community #bc that shit is also going to make people decide to sort us by a similar standard. so long as all of us aren't accepted none of us will be

[chrollohearttags]

FIRE HYDRANT • portgas d. ace

ace loves his little squirter, perhaps a bit too much.

content + themes: firefighter!ace, firefighter!reader, choking, hate fucking, heavy squirting, he’s such a mean dom in this, mentions of oral sex, daddy is used, finger sucking, slapping, pet names are used (my love, babygirl, sweetheart), calls reader slut, missionary/mating press

📝: just a lil something to help me get my steam back. If it’s bad, you never saw it.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰───────✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰────

“Okay, okayyyy…take some outtt..fuck!”

“Don’t be stupid, now move your hand before I do it for you.”

he was relentless and had been for the past couple hours or so..it seemed like he had no intention of doing so anytime soon either. Perhaps this time around..your big ass mouth had bit off far more than you could ever chew. Hence why at the moment..he was fish hooking his fingers in the sides of your jaws. Prompting you to suck on them as a means to shut you up. Feeding you a light tap to the cheek to ensure so as well.

“Rookie..how many times do I have to say it, huh? You don’t run a damn thing. It’s been what..four? Five? Hell, I’ve lost count how many times you’ve come on this dick. It’s like you can’t get enough of me, my love. I already knew that much though.”

the words tearing through you like a serrated dagger, slowly but surely cutting you up. A reminder of your weak resolve. You hated it, you hated it so fucking much that the one man you despised got you wetter than any boyfriend or partner you’d ever encountered. That this bastard knew your body far better than you did sometimes. He could do things that you’d never even imagined..taking you to heights unknown and yet, all you could do was stare at him in disgust as his cock plunged within your center repeatedly. Slamming balls deep as they smacked against your puckering asshole; drenched in your sticky mixture from drumming it out of you. It was just as he said, you had come for him for about the seventh time now. Running on fumes and pure spite to keep going. Maybe you wanted to prove him wrong that you could take whatever he threw your way, including the dick.

“Haaaah!—shit! Not right there..I’m gonna—“

“I know, babygirl. I know you are so why fight it? Squirt on daddy’s dick. Feels much better than arguing with me, doesn’t it?”

or..you loved the way he fucked you and your pride wouldn’t allow you to admit it! It would explain the large puddle formed underneath the towels on his couch and the splashes surrounding his foot; the other planted next to you so that he could truly get in it the way he wanted. And here you were..in the last position you wanted to be! Folded like a goddamn pretzel with your toes wiggling behind your head and this asshole hovering over you with that same stupid grin on his face, those deep set eyes and his necklace dangling in front of your nose. He was enjoying this. Enjoying turning his stubborn little rookie into his personal fire hydrant. The tight, juicy grip of that cunt embracing him like a warm hug..tinting his tan hued shaft with a sheet of white essence before exploding into the sweet, delicious rain as he made you squirt yet again. He’d never had pussy like it and it was for that reason alone, he put up with your bad attitude or rather, calmed it down.

“Nnggghhh!..I can’t..” your words were barely even making it above a decibel. A lot more quiet than the shouting you did at him when you first arrived. Pissed off about your inspection results earlier in the day. Granted, that was before he hissed at you to sit down, shut the fuck up and be a good slut for him..before he snatched your sundress down to reveal those plump tits and sucked on those gorgeous brown nipples that go so erect for him as he fingered you. And well before pinned your legs back and damn near sucked the flavor from your pussy! Using those nimble fingers to get you to climax..it was then that he discovered your little secret:

“Ahhh..so you’re a squirter, rookie? Well that’s good to know.”

and hadn’t stopped exploring it since. So for the duration of your stay, he’d been stretching that pussy out and using you to his heart's desire. Pulling on your hair, smacking on that fat ass as he gave you vicious backshots. Even tossing the pillow out of your way so you had zero comfort. His punishment for waking him up. Using your mouth as his personal cock sleeve, making you eat him up until you made a mess, calling him daddy after rewarding you with a warm nut to the back of your throat and after that, the fun really began. He’d kept you like this..drawing out orgasm after orgasm; streams of clear juices reaching as far up to his chest. Pulling out, tapping that mushroom tip against your slit to coax out another right after. He was having too much fun!

“You talk a lot of shit for someone who can’t even keep her eyes open. Too bad for you..”

suddenly, you’d feel the hard clutch of his digits around your throat which prompted you to gasp for air whilst clawing at his forearm. Zeroing in on your face, he’d hiss through gritted teeth and smile before slamming your head back down: “we’re not done, so wake that ass up. ‘M gonna beat that little pussy of yours so sore, you’ll be lucky if you can crawl out of here when I’m done. Gonna fuck you until you’re empty, baby..”

and something told you, that wouldn’t be anytime soon!

#portgas d ace #portgas ace x reader #portgas d ace x black reader #ace x black reader #portgas ace x you #portgas ace smut #portgas ace x y/n #ace one piece #one piece ace #one piece smut #one piece au #one piece modern au #one piece #one piece drabble #one piece imagine #ace imagine #one piece x black!reader #one piece x reader #firefighter au #one piece series #op smut #op ace #op x reader #op x y/n #black reader #cw smut #cw suggestive #cw choking #wrote this at 10am because I had nothing else to do #black fem reader

[laundrybiscuits]

(ETA: now edited and up on AO3)

Look. Eddie knows he can be a little uptight about these things, but. There are rules. If you become a vampire, you don’t need to go full gothic Count Von Dickhead or whatever, but you absolutely cannot just wander around in a puffy vest and light-wash jeans. 

“Why not?” says Steve. He’s leaning back in an armchair, sipping on a bloodbag like it’s a goddamn juicebox. “What, are the vampire police going to arrest me?” 

He pauses. “Wait. There aren’t vampire police, are there?”

“No,” says Eddie. “Probably not. I don’t know. But there are standards which you are refusing to uphold, Steven.”

“Thought you were all about hating conformity, Edward,” Steve says. He’s got an obnoxiously cocky little smirk, the smug undead fucker. 

Eddie grimaces. “Don’t call me that, asswipe. Don’t you feel, like—the call of the night? The siren song of life coursing through fragile human veins? A hunger for destruction that those paltry plastic bags of blood can never truly slake?”

“The bloodbags aren’t so bad,” says Steve, around the straw. “Better than protein shakes.”

“I actually hate you,” Eddie tells him. “Vampirism is wasted on you.”

Steve noisily slurps the last of the blood out of the bottom of the bag. “Come on, you can’t really picture me in some Dracula getup, can you?”

The problem, of course, is that Eddie really, really can. When Robin had read him in on the whole situation, obviously he’d been horrified and concerned—but also, a whole wing of his brain had immediately been cordoned off to work overtime imagining Steve in elaborate Dark Prince regalia, maybe leaning elegantly out of a castle window on the moors, gazing into the foggy dusk. Velvet might’ve been involved.

“...guess not,” says Eddie. It doesn’t sound incredibly convincing to his own ears, but Steve just shrugs and gets up to throw the bloodbag away. 

“There you go, man,” he says, clapping Eddie on the shoulder as he passes. “It’s the 80s. Vampires can be whatever we wanna be.”

———

It gets way too easy to forget about Steve’s condition, until Eddie ends up having to haul him out of a bar in Indy before they get banned for life.  

“Simmer down, buddy,” Eddie says, pulling him into the shadow of the van. “Let’s get those fangs packed away before any of the nice villagers wander by with torches and pitchforks.”

“I’m good,” pants Steve. “It’s all good. Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.”

Eddie lifts an unimpressed eyebrow. “Sure, that’s why your eyes are glowing red and you’re, like, fully vamped out. Which, by the way, looks extremely dumb with the whole clean-cut vibe you decided to rock tonight.”

“Fuck you, I look great,” says Steve, pushing a hand through his hair. He’s not wrong, it’s just not relevant to how he also looks extremely dumb like this, wearing a pristine henley with fangs hanging out in the parking lot for anyone to see.

“So what the hell happened in there, man? I was finally starting to get somewhere with Todd, and…” Eddie trails off in dawning realization.

“Holy shit, am I—I’m like your territory, aren’t I? Your stupid vampire brain got all screwy and decided to loop me in with Robin and the kids as part of your freaky human coven.”

“Uh,” says Steve. He looks unhappy in a shifty kind of way. “Something like that, maybe.”

“Wait, so, are Nancy and Jonathan—are you okay with them because they’re both already in the vamp pack? Is Vickie gonna have to be inaugurated before she and Robin can bone down?” Eddie perks up. “Shit, is there a ceremony? We could totally do a ceremony.” He bets he can get the kids to liberate some velour curtains from the drama club. With a few candles, they could get some serious atmosphere going.

“No, shut up, nobody’s doing a damn ceremony,” Steve groans. “Vickie’s fine.” 

“Okay,” says Eddie. “So…you gonna tell me what all that was about, then? Do I have to start running guys past you first so your vamp instincts don’t wig out? Or…hm, maybe Argyle’d be down to mess around sometime.”

Steve lets out an actual snarl with weird animal echoes, then claps a hand over his mouth.

“Sorry,” he says, muffled. The shadows around them seem darker somehow. 

“So I’m just not allowed to get laid ever again,” says Eddie slowly. “For vampire reasons.”

“Do whatever you want, man.” Steve’s still got his hand pressed tight over his mouth. 

“And it’s…just me?” Eddie peers at the tightness around Steve’s eyes; the way he’s scowling stubbornly at his feet. “Huh. Kind of…possessive, Harrington.”

“It’s—weird,” says Steve miserably, dropping his hand at last. “I know it’s fucking weird.”

“Maybe.” Eddie shrugs, biting down on the grin he can feel tugging at his mouth. “Lucky for you, I’m into that shit.”

“What?” Steve frowns. “You’re…”

“Always wanted a vampire boyfriend,” says Eddie. “Like, are you kidding? I would’ve sold my fucking soul at 15 for something like that.”

“I’m starting to feel a little objectified here,” says Steve, but he’s smiling, and he reaches out to snag Eddie’s belt loop and tug him stumbling closer. “Just in it for the fangs, huh?”

“Well, you’re kind of a shitty vampire, actually.” Eddie drapes his arms over Steve’s shoulders. “So I guess I must just be in it for you.”

Steve hesitates, searching Eddie’s face. Stray red lights are still sparking like embers in Steve’s irises. “Okay, but—you’re in it? Right?”

“Couldn’t get rid of me if you tried, Bunnicula. I’ll send the vampire police after you, just watch me,” says Eddie, and kisses him.

#steddie #vampire steve harrington #I don't know what happened; I just sat down and wrote this even though I have a million other things to do #I was briefly possessed by the spirit of 'what if steve harrington were the least genre-appropriate vampire of all time' #and also my perpetual need to write people with terrible communication skills #I may edit this a bit more when it's not 3am but ftr I am not planning on any continuations

[starlost97]

— distractions.

summary: You always hated when Max got into fights, and because of that, he stopped. However, when you came into question, he just couldn't help it.

keywords: fluff, Max Verstappen (almost) fights, Max Verstappen is protective, walk him like a dog vibes, 2018!Max Verstappen, gn!reader.

characters: Max Verstappen.

warnings: almost a fight, lots of swearing, shoving.

a/n: I remember having so much fun writing this one! the prompt was "them hearing someone talking shit about you while you're not near". I didn't write what they said (just wrote that they said something)! also this one's a part of the shortfics series (that I desperately need a name to) as well!

word count: 491.

requested?: yes! by a friend.

Max was known for his temper. At 21 years old he still got into fights, and for some time there was nothing that could stop him.

Then he met you, an incredibly sweet person that — for some reason — fell in love with him almost as hard as he fell in love with you. So now he had a reason to think before doing.

Still, when he heard someone muttering all the things that they would do to you, every piece of self-control that he had broke to pieces.

"What did you just say?” He asked, his voice a bit louder than usual. “Are you fucking deaf? What the fuck did you just say?”

“You are hearing things, Verstappen.” The man said, now a bit more courageous as he stepped closer with his hands in his pockets.

“Why don't you act like the man you pretend to be and own what you just fucking said?” Max said, shoving him hard against the wall.

“What's your fucking problem?” The guy asked, now getting angry.

“My problem?! You are asking me what my problem is.” Max asked, more to himself as he tried to process what he just heard. “I’ll show you exactly what my fucking problem is.” He said, violently grabbing the guy's collar and shoving him against the wall one more time. Max was angry enough to break the man's nose right there, but then, he heard a familiar voice.

“Max!”

In seconds, the guy was on the floor. Max didn't even hesitate to let him go and turn his attention to you, who had your arms crossed and looked at him with a look of disapproval.

“You know I don't like when you get into fights.” You said, making Max smile.

“I'm so sorry, babe. When he started talking shit about you… God, it was stronger than me.” He said, caressing your cheek with his thumb and kissing your forehead. He let his eyes linger around your features for a bit. “How can you be so pretty? I can't comprehend it.”

Someone might say that he was trying to change the subject so he doesn't get in trouble, but truly, everything about you was a distraction factor. Your rosy lips and how kisseable they are, the way your hair looks and feels so soft against his fingers, and your eyes…

God, your eyes.

Max was going crazy, really. One of his favorite things about you — even before you started dating — would be your eyes. And now when they look at him carrying such love…

Max likes to talk about how not even the greatest of the poets could express the feeling that those pretty eyes conveyed him.

“What were we talking about?” He asks, genuinely, as he comes back to reality, making you chuckle.

“Nothing important.” Max smiles at your answer, getting distracted once again by your pretty lips, which he gently kissed, now distracting you too.

#max verstappen #f1 #formula one #formula 1 #formula one x reader #f1 x reader #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you

[beescake]

i am in love with your sollux i think

sollux love party :]

if you’re interested heres some of my personal fondness thoughts on him.. big warning for the mega long read ahead aye

as we alr know sollux's rejection of participation somewhat mirrors dave's rejection of heroism, but even without getting cooked to completion i still find sollux's character v compelling beyond the fourth wall

as someone who doesnt get a pinch of that Protagonist Sparkle to begin with, he can openly say he wants to leave anytime…. and unlike dave, he actually Can leave the scene anytime. but he can never be truly Free from the story via permanent character death like the other trolls.

his irrelevancy is indeed relevant - he’s there so u can point him out.

while his image is intended to be a relic of past internet subculture, his role is not only about hehehaha being a Chad or a 2000s cyberforum 2²chan haxxor ragequit gamebro.

his continued existence also happens to add a Bit to the overarching themes of homestuck! a Bit that gives him longer-lasting thematic relevance compared to the trolls who could’ve had more character potential but didnt get to survive beyond the main story.

the Bit in question:

his defiance contributes to the illusion of agency (treating characters = people with autonomy). he’s “aware” of it, and that recognition is worth noting enough to forcibly keep him alive as both reward and punishment.

considering how his personality & classpect is designed its definitely a very haha thing for hussie to do LOL. he’s made to be op asf so he's resigned to doing dirty work, gradually deteriorating along the way but never truly dying. as fans have mentioned before, him openly rejecting involvement after a while of grim tolerance is like if the sim u were controlling suddenly stopped, looked up and gave u the finger while u were step six into the walkthrough for Every Possible Sim Death Animation.

but since he’s just a sim… the more he hates it, the more you keep him around. if ur sim started complaining abt your whimsical household storyline you’d definitely keep that little fuck.

but yeah i like that sollux is just idling. the significance of his presence being that one dude who's always reliably Somewhere, root core Unchanged, no individual ambitions (possibly due to fear of consequence?), and design-wise: a staple representative product of his time.

compared to dirk's character, who has aged phenomenally well into the present (themes of control + AR + artificial intelligence, clearer exploration around navigating relationships/sexuality, infinite possibilities of self-splinterhood and trait inheritance), sollux's potential is really... contained. bitter. defeatist. limiting and frustrating in the way old tech is.

the world continues moving on to shinier, brighter, more advanced automated things - minimalist and metaverse or whatever but sollux is still here 🧍‍♂️ going woohoo redblue 3d. (tho personally i imagine his vibe similar to what the kids call cassette futurism on pinterest mixed w more grimy grunge insectoid influences eheh)

conceptually-speaking,

at the foundation of it all, the rapid pace of modern development was built off the understanding of ppl like sollux in the past, who were There actively at work while the dough was still beginning to rise

thats one of the cool things abt the idea of trolls preceding humans! the idea that trolls like sollux excelled back when lots of basic shit still needed to be discovered, building structures like networks and codes from scratch, and humans will eventually inherit and reinvent that knowledge in ways that become so optimized it makes the old manual effort seem archaic, slow, and labour-intensive.

but despite information/resources/shortcuts being more accessible now, much of the new highly-anticipated stuff released on trend still end up unfinished, inefficient, or expiring quickly due to cutting corners under severe capitalistic pressures

meanwhile, some of the old stuff frm past generations of thorough, exploratory and perfectionistic development still remains working, complete, and ever so sturdy.

those things continue to exist, just outside our periphery with either:

zero purpose left for modern needs (outdated/obsolete)

or

far too important to replace or destroy, bcs of its surprisingly essential and circumstantial usefulness in one niche specific area.

which are honestly? both points that sum up sollux pree well.

dramatic ending sorry. anw are u still on the fence or are u Sick abt him like me </3

#ask #anon #sollux captor #homestuck #hs2 spoilers #2023 #vioart #hs2 sollux explaining girls and bitches to john: 🗣️🗣️🗣️ #mr foods‚ setting up the visuals: LMAO ok pause. cool story bro theyre all gone its just u n ur sandwich bro. #now that i think abt it sol's kind of a toaster? awkwardly takes up countertop space #lacks the versatility and sociability of an air fryer/pressure cooker. unwashed and littered w crumbs! #but sometimes the clear‚ frank simplicity of the toaster is a temporary lifesaver for ppl who struggle w low appetite / decision fatigue #or ppl who just have a habit of eating toast for breakfast LOL #and eh ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯ even if u dont feel like toasting today thats ok he's still gonna be sitting there 👍👍 #a funnyman..... i curse him in my pan but root for him in my biscuit 🫶

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Fuckboy Eddie falls in love, fwb, little bit of smut. Cocky Eddie, 18+ Mdni.

🎀💌

Fuckboy Eddie has met his match when it comes to you, he assumes because at first you're sweet and a little on the shy side that he will be the one calling the shots.

He's wrong of course.

On the night that the two of you meet it's at one of Steve's parties. He's recently started throwing them again for the gang, it's fun and he's met a ton of hot chicks because of it.

You're a friend of Steve and Robins who work with him at Family Video, At the party you stick close to the two of them, nervous about meeting new people.

Occasionally Eddie manages to catch your eye, he winks at you from where he's sitting, flirts heavily when Robin and Steve introduce you to the rest of the gang.

Seduce and fuck, that's his motto, he's not interested in seeing a woman more than once, and he much prefers the briefest flings if he does. That way no one expects anything more from him.

He doesn't see how tonight will go any different but boy he's in for a surprise. The first surprise is when he asks you out, you look him dead in the eye and smirk.

"Sorry pretty boy, I'm not interested" Eddie's brain goes brrr for a few seconds, he can't remember the last time his flirting attempts failed so spectacularly.

"I uh..." he stumbles over his words, tongue tied and growing frustrated with himself. You take pity on him.

"Look I haven't had sex in like the longest time, I'm horny as shit and even though I say I'm not looking for anything more than some hot sex, we all know someone always catches feelings for their fuck buddy and I'd like to avoid that"

He gapes stunned then recovers. "What a coincidence, I'm just looking for just some hot sex too" you eye him up and down, there's a small smile on your face.

"Oh honey, you wouldn't be able to handle me, I'd rock your world" your hand brushes over his shoulder as you sashay pass him, he gently tugs you back and your eyes meet his, full of lust.

"Try me sweetheart"

...

Exactly twenty minutes later the two of you are in Eddie's room, the door locked and the two of you sweaty, naked and fucking each other until you're both spent and sated.

Eddie is lying beside you, his head empty of all thoughts except the fact that you did rock his world, repeatedly. The sex was mindblowing.

You lay with him for a minute before getting up and pulling on your clothes, "Where are you going?" He asked confused as you fix your hair and make up.

"Early start handsome, gotta run. That was fantastic" you blow him a kiss and then you're out the door, leaving Eddie speechless.

Well that was a first.

...

The same situation carried on for weeks, the two of you would have sex and it would be incredible but then either one of you would leave.

Except Eddie noticed that his bed was a lot colder without you in it, missed your laugh or you sarcasm when you weren't around. So he started going to Family Video more to spend time with you, flirt and see your pretty smile.

Whenever that smile was directed at him, it was like his whole heart went pitter patter very fast, he felt like he was a teenager again with his very first crush.

Butterflies, racing heart, sweaty palms, it was humiliating. He hated when some douchebag noticed you, so Eddie left little lovebites on your skin and pleased you for hours if some idiot tried to flirt with you. He liked reminding you that he could pleasure you better than some limp dick asshole.

He loved when you cried out his name, chanted it in sweet, reverent tones.

That's when Eddie came to the conclusion one day when you were laying fast asleep beside him after a long work day and a very hot shower session with him. His conclusion being that finally after all of these years he had met his match.

"Someone always catches feelings for their fuck buddy" that's exactly what you said all those weeks ago.

He just never expected that he would be the one who caught feelings.

The fuckboy was well and truly fucked... and completely in love with you.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson #eddie munson smut