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shiftingdiariesofophelia · 10 months

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little update for you guys:

so i’ve had literally no time for shifting recently 💀 I haven’t even attempted in a month or so.

and i know everyone’s like “make time!” or “shifting is easy just do ___!” girl i’m telling you i’m up at 6 in the morning and my day isn’t over until 11, then i need to go to sleep and do it all again the next day. having responsibilities sucks ass.

BUT- in the meantime, I’ve been exploring potential DRs and making pinterest boards and cute little spotify playlists and basically it’s the main way i’m attached to shifting right now. My living situation has changed (positive) but that’s a whole other mess and basically Ophelia has NO time ❌

So updates might be slow until i move into my dorm in August, but anyway here’s a new list of some of my drs in case anyone is looking for a new place to shift:

So, I have my Hogwarts DR right? But honestly, it’s not really my main focus at the moment. i’m really just trying to get to my waiting room before i decide where the hell i’m going. this dr is cute and adorable and feels very homey to me. i’ve actually considered permashifting there tbh. it’s the world i’ve scripted the most for and what ignited my shifting journey.

Then, I have a Fame dr. kind of obligatory at first but the more i was getting into it, the more shit i’ve added and i actually love it now. it’s a mid-2010s and onward fame dr, so it’s like 2015 where i’m shifting. i’ve scripted to start out on broadway (OBC for katherine pulitzer in newsies), eventually working my way to the acting industry and then the music industry. i’ve got at least three albums planned and I even have an idea for a directorial debut limited series. I’ve also scripted myself into movies and shows that don’t exist in my cr so i’m excited to see how that goes!

I have some ideas for a marvel/Avengers dr. I’m a Greek demi-goddess with questionable parentage, but I insert myself into Tony’s life right around the first Iron Man. With weird time mechanics and whatever I just want to be besties with peter parker and train with strange and bucky tbh. extended found family is what i live for

I’m working on an Avatar: The Last Airbender dr lmao. i wanna be a fire bender so bad it’s unreal. I’m also adding separate countries under the same nation. like yes, there’s the earth kingdom and fire kingdom, but they have separate designations sort of like the southern and northern water tribes.

I’m thinking of a pjo/camp-half-blood dr because that would be cool as hell. going on quests with the gang and having powers?? i’d probably script some stuff in or out but the idea is really cool to me and i was always a percy jackson kid

lost in space dr !!! if you don’t know what i’m talking about there’s an original series from years ago or there’s a netflix reboot but basically this is a found family dr that takes place in space/alien planets and there’s a robot. maureen and john robinson are so mother and father coded it’s unreal.

hawkins, indiana dr but not “really” a stranger things dr because i don’t want to traumatize these kids or be traumatized myself lmao i’m basically just living in hawkins but all the friend groups are the same. also i’m dustin’s older sister because he’s adorable.

youtuber dr where i’m in weird/conspiracy core youtube and make those sorts of videos. i wanna make content with some of my more niche weird faves like wendigoon, nexpo, etc. this is really niche for a dr but i think it’s gonna be fun as hell.

bridgerton dr, y’all fr need to get in on this. new pretty dresses every day, men competing for my hand in marriage, elitist politics, orchestral music, flowers everywhere- it’s just going to be a good time i know it.

The 100 but specifically seasons 1-2 (MAYBE 3). Less death and more fun but with some scripting i think the idea of a society run by delinquent teenagers from space who are also fighting barbaric remnants of a destroyed civilization sounds cool as HELL bro. But i finished the show and the plot after the time jump isn’t what I want so i’m gonna script the hell out of the actual plot to make it fit what i want.

Trap House dr ! (another youtuber dr, shockingly) with the trap house circa the late 2010s. ghost hunting with sam and colby, talking shit with jake and corey, doing stupid shit and partying and just having a good time bro. i’m also scripting out Elton 🙈

narnia dr but specifically from LWW through the golden era of narnia. ruling over a mythological land with the pevensies, exploring the lands as far as they go, learning the lore with the other places in the world narnia exists in (where the telmarines come from and the other nations), i just think it’d be cool as hell.

and i want to figure out how to make like a zombie (potentially TWD or TLOU) dr without it being traumatizing 😭😭 stay tuned for how that works out lmaooo

#shifting #reality shifting #shifting advice #shifting update #quantum jumping #shifttok #shiftblr #ophie speaks

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madamemachikonew · 9 months

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54. What’s your favorite part about the fanfiction writing process?

I find it easy to immerse myself in your work, and wanted to know if you had a technique for consistency haha ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

Aww, firstly thank you for the compliment! I'm so glad to hear you enjoy reading my work! And thank you also for the question.

Hmm, so I guess I should start with a broad overview of my process. My fics usually start with some kind of favourite scene that will then lead the concept and plot. Or there are certain dialogues that I want to happen and it's non-negotiable that they are cut. It's completely ass over backwards, I know. I will then often work backwards to plot the route of how we get there, sometimes by several chapters. Some of my fics are more episodic, so this doesn't really count because each chapter is almost like a stand alone one-shot but with continuity (e.g. my Enjou and Baizhu longfics). For the episodic fics, I usually keep a list of ideas or scenes for chapters that I want to include but the order is somewhat flexible because there's no real overarching plot as such.

But the Pants fic requires a lot more advanced planning (though I still keep a list of ideas for scenes). So with that one I plot a broad framework using the key scenes or dialogues as the markers and then flesh them out, not necessarily in the chapter order. For example, I have a chapter already written that is plot vital but won't occur maybe for another three or four chapters from now. It can't happen any earlier, but I needed to get it out of my system. And now I have a firm anchor to work towards. It also means I can make sure the intervening chapters are consistent and have subtle foreshadowing, etc. because I know for sure what is going to happen. I like to think that some of these details and foreshadowing also give the fic extra mileage on a reread, because now the reader can spot them (eg Pants's meeting with Signora and Zhongli with the gnosis hits different once you know his life story, which comes in a later chapter). So then I'll go back and forth fleshing out the interceding chapters little by little. I rarely sit down and write a whole chapter in one go or consecutively. The ending arc of my still ongoing Enjou fic was fully drafted around the chapter 10 mark - it's at chapter 39 now and over 100k, but I already know how it will end. But like any chapters I write in advance, I come back constantly and refine them before I hit post.

As for my favourite part of all of this...I guess the descriptions (as if that wasn't clear enough lol)! Once upon a time I wanted to be a cinematographer and/or director (Narrator: she did not become either of these things, though she did do a lot of arty amateur photography over the years) and I think my writing is probably a subconscious reflection of this in terms of its 'staging' and 'close up shots' if that makes sense? This will sound pretentious af, but since I'm not very good at drawing, I want to convey a vivid picture in the reader's imagination that correlates as far as possible with how I've visually imagined the scene in my mind and the arty background shots that aren't necessarily of the characters' faces. Imagine stuff like a close up of Pants's hands as he throws some ice cubes into a tumbler or a lower profile shot showing how the trinket on his glasses dangles and sparkles off the stage lights in an otherwise dark theatre. That kind of thing. The only way I can do that is through the descriptions as I can't storyboard it like I would a film or animation. I think these subtle descriptive elements bring it more to life. I enjoy imagining the scene from a purely visual basis as much as the content, as I think it's important when you're storytelling.

Another favourite thing of mine is showing contrasting inner thoughts of characters in the same situation, for example the scene where Pants is 'grieving' for Signora. If I was working to a more orthodox 'xReader' format, I could only show you what Reader actually sees or hears from her own perspective (as I did when she sees Signora getting into the rickshaw with Pants). But I also like to show the actual fic readers (as opposed to the character) the full story.

My other favourite thing is integrating lore nerdery. So I love researching tiny details from NPC dialogue or quest lore or whatever and making them part of the plot, to give the whole fic more depth from a world-building perspective and show how they weave into the main characters' lives. Since I normally write for NPCs (Baizhu pre-playable era, Enjou, Pants...) I have to extrapolate a lot from the tiny crumbs we get. A lot of lore goes unintentionally ignored as well because we don't understand the significance of it in the early game, for example, Landa's quest is now more significant than it was when it was released. It's so interesting going back and seeing how it all comes together.

#ask #ask game #milk-supply!#writing process

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boundinparchment · 9 months

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for the writer ask 3, 14, 18, 26, 43, 55, & 68!

3) Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic

Usually I work off of an outline; if I don't have one for the whole fic, I'll work on that first, even if it's just rough for that chapter. What I need to happen in the chapter and what kind of scenes would accomplish that. I find that outlining and constantly thinking about the rest of the fic and having plot points as goals, etc., is what helps me finish fics, even if it takes years.

14) How do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

Sometimes personal experience is thrown in, yes. But only in crumbs. Exact situations, no. The emotional parts? A little bit. All writers do. What I don't know first-hand and feels weak gets researched so it at least feels authentic. Angst is usually where I feel my characters' emotions far more than joyous scenes. The latter tend to make me feel proud and like the characters have overcome a lot. (Not that they don't deserve to be happy regardless but characters serve a plot and the story as a whole is better when things are earned).

18) Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

Already answered! <3

26) Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Hmm, that's a good one! Deus in Absentia definitely qualifies, Under Observation does as well, and I would argue DALDOM can be a wild ride if you don't read the tags, I guess lol.

43) Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

I love hurting my characters, who are we kidding. They all get to suffer before they can be happy. The only way out is through, you know?

55) Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

Excluding canon characters (because that's literally just Dottore and Zhongli and it's clear who I've chosen to let occupy my brain for now.)

It's a tie between Musician Reader, Accountant Reader, and Karina.

Used to be Karina only. But as I got more familiar with a reader character who has a more defined personality and acts as a pair of shoes for a reader to walk in, I've grown to really love Musician Reader over the course of the story. She's still a little too passive at times, in my opinion, but she is the softest character I have (in comparison to Karina who is detached and traumatized af and Accountant Reader who has no room for her own wellbeing).

68) What, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

Literally anything other than writing and touching the source material (if I'm feeling burnt out, as I often am) but it's so easy to forget to do these things because I don't feel up to them. I talk to others and bounce ideas around IRL and online. I read books of different genres but ones I still enjoy, I'll play different games, do housework, spend time away from social and fic and go outside. Sometimes, I go for a drive if it's nice out. TLDR: I get out of my head because inspiration exists outside of myself lol

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lumilasi · 1 year

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💘

💘Is there any posted fic you want to rework/re-edit/re-write?

I've already done this kinda thing actually; I re-wrote Reanimate in large parts back in 2020, and just recently began to re-write and post an old bleach fic.

There are small parts in probably majority of my fics I'd probably want to rework a bit, but it tends to be quite a hassle to do so, hence I don't often do it. (Reanimate was pretty much an exception where I went through the effort because of a lot of reasons; wanting to flesh out my characters properly, not liking that L.o.v portayal, thinking at the time I'd never write the sequel, etc)

To give examples;

In AFS, the entire training camp arc felt unnecessary in hindsight. Removing it changes a lot of things however, so it feels like too big of a rewrite to do at this time.

Soul duality needs to be more coherent. It was essentially a hot mess of ideas where I kept changing my mind about the plot direction mid-story multiple times. It would need a complete rewrite in other words, not really interested in doing it rn

The neighbors ending needed to be foreshadowed more than it was. I kinda came up with it at the last minute. Now this is a relatively easy change in comparsion, but rn I'm not interested in doing it either lol

#ask game #Answered ask

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gunsatthaphan · 2 years

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BL ~ Drama Asks

Got tagged by the loveliest @wanderlust-in-my-soul thank you so much 🥰 I think I did a few of these already but these questions are different lol so here we go.

1. If you had to watch one drama forever what would it be?

Forever? Like in a continuous loop? Probably Love Stage lol. it’s so funny and so cute and just very easy to watch. It’s one of my favorites 🥺💜 Also maybe TOL.

2. If you could change the ending of a drama which one would it be?

I mean obviously MODC deserves a kick in the butt for that ending so I would change that, and also maybe Nitiman. I just thought it was so underwhelming.

3. Name your favorite drama and tell who your favorite character was.

I can’t pick one all-time favorite but a character that still stands out to me is Yok from Not Me. I just loved everything about him, he was so well-shaped and realistic and lovable and First’s acting was so natural. Best Boi. A+

4. Name a drama you dropped within the first few episodes ~ we all have at least one!

I hate dropping stuff with all my heart lol but sometimes it’s just inevitable lmao. Top Secret Together was one that I watched the first episode and was immediately like Nope. Others were Waterboyy, Gameboys, Physical Therapy and So Much in Love.

5. Name a popular drama you've never watched and why?

KP because the concept never appealed to me, also I wasn’t intrigued by any of the trailers. Another one is Triage which I only didn’t watch because it came at the wrong time lol. I’m tired of the doctor theme and also I was still attached to TaeSingto at the time lol. But it’s on my watchlist so I’ll probably pick it up when I’m in the mood.

And then there’s Secret Crush on You, of which I actually saw the first episode but the cringe was just too much to handle lmao. However I am a huge fan of BillySeng’s chemistry, also since seeing them in bangkok, I just think they’re fantastic. So I think in a different environment and with a different script, I would’ve eaten that shit up lol. Super excited to see them in War of Y!

6. Name a drama you regret watching.

That’s My Candy. Holy shit. I have no idea how I managed to pulled through that one but it was definitely the strangest piece of media I have ever consumed lmaoo. On the other hand it was so bad and weird that it was entertaining. Similar to Unforgotten Night. But still, the regrets are deep kdfjgkfd. Same with Gen Y which was so horrendously bad that I felt the deepest relief when it was over lmao.

7. Name a drama you thought you’d never watch but did and did you end up liking it?

I can’t really think of one specific drama right now but generally, I tend to discard the japanese stuff lol. 99% of the bls I watch are Thai and the styles are just so different that I’m always like nah, even when someone recommends them to me. But the reason I end up forcing myself to watch them is because 90% of the time I end up liking them lol. It takes a few minutes to get into it but once I’m in, I love it lol. One example is My Beautiful Man.

It’s similar with Korean bls. One example would be Ocean Likes Me, which, just based on the plot, I probably would not have watched if it weren’t for Holland lol. And I ended up loving it so much that it made my top 5 of korean bls lol.

8. Name a pairing you want to see?

I know we’re getting this in Moonlight Chicken but First and Mix is a very interesting combination that I’m very excited to see - even though it’s probably gonna be toxic af lmao rip.

9. Name a pairing you didn’t think had chemistry?

I’m generally not a fan of side couples. 99% of the time their story is rushed and underdeveloped due to compromised screen time etc. - danyok and ramking are the only exceptions. They’re just always a letdown for me. One that I’m not feeling whatsoever chemistry-wise is Tim and Mai from My Secret Love. I’m fast forwarding through all of their scenes because I don’t feel a spark at all. Also the side couples in Even Sun are not really clicking in my opinion. Out of the main pairings, I absolutely hated DunBas as ThanuWayu in Gen Y. They were so boring and stale that it hurt lol. Truly terrible.

10. Name a pairing you have seen in another drama that you like?

Like a pairing that has appeared in multiple dramas? I guess EarthMix and OffGun then lol. I liked EM in ATOTS but I preferred them in Cupids Last Wish. They upped their acting game so much. OffGun are killing it in everything except for Puppy Honey because that show was a hate crime jdhgjdf. But it was their first gig so I forgive them lol. Also I’m still highkey a simp for OabGun, who were fantastic in The Blue Hour and also in Club Sapan Fine. I would love to see them in something new!!

thank you for tagging me, this was fun!! 💜 I’m tagging some of my usual suspects lol ofc you don’t have to 🙈

@leonpob @khunvegas @my-wandering-rabbit @emisfritish @clairificusrex @demonicmusuko @pharawee @nonbinarybella @eaasysarcasm @mrsandypants and as always, everyone else who feels like it!! 😊

xxx

#tag game #bl dramas #cupids last wish #earthmix #moonlight chicken #offgun #thai bl #love stage

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catgirl-catboy · 1 year

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Since you are autistic too: I have this issue that I go way to deep into works, specifically my favorite characters. Seeing them criticized hurts, or sometimes even seeing plot developments that hurt them hurts so much that I can't rewatch the series and can't participate in the fandom anymore. (I don't harass people because of it, I just sit there and try to not show anything). It was worse in the past, and I already did a lot to distance myself from them, but its still too much to participate.

Any idea how to get lesser attached to them? I do some exercises in differentiation and boundaries I found at the internet, but its still not quite enough.

(Anon on because the antis stalking me surely would use this information against me)

I'm not a therapist, so please take this with a grain of salt. If it doesn't vibe, chuck the advice out.

That seems like a manifestation of RSD to me, but it could also be hyperempathy. Do these characters remind you of yourself, by chance? (You don't have to tell me, just food for thought.)

Also, good on you for distancing yourself from the fandom. From what you've told me, that seems like a good move for your mental health.

If its hyperempathy, I try thinking about it like a story within a story, if that makes any sort of sense? Like, the characters exist, but this isn't how it actually went down. My headcanon is the only canon that matters to me. Maybe the blorbos are just play-acting, that hurt character gets revived offscreen, etc. (Not to overshare, but this helps me a lot with when things don't align with my kin memories.)

If its RSD, thats a bit harder for me to give advice on. I'd practice trying to stay in the moment, or maybe take a break from reading a post. Positive affirmations always help! RSD is a legit bitch, so this is absolutely not easy. Practice makes perfect sounds fake AF, but it does ring true. (Unfortunately.)

Either way, I advise:

Finding a friend that gets it that you can bitch too

taking a two week break from the fandom if it gets too draining

getting into another fandom! I just watched Yuri on Ice for the first time- it was pretty good if you need recs.

#ask tag #if you have any advice feel free to share #its a thing I struggle with as well! :)

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messedupessy · 4 years

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SAY HI TO MELLO YA ALL (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ❤

Ok so, this needs some explanation... so over on twitter there is a bit of an Underlöst craze going on atm, but now with doing them with different au’s and stuff, and I got very inspired and couldn’t help myself from trying to make my own take on a SwapLust au because I got absolutely no self control xD but then things like got weird as the au I came up with is nothing like Underlöst, or even my own take on it either, it morphed into its completely own thing, so may I present to ya all... EeaseSwap! :D

Will explain a bit more about it under a cut later and also go into a bit more details about this boy, just want to say some other things first!

For example how happy I am with his design, I am srsly so happy with how he looks, his outfit is so good I am so proud of it like seriously look at this boi! He is so flipping cute and he turned out so good, used the original sketch I made of him in my sketchbook as the base for this whole ref, and I actually messed up a bit as when I did the refs of my Underlöst bros I put the head onto the body proper before beginning to draw all properly, but I messed that up but solved it in the end xD So proud of this boy though he turned out so good bless

And now, onto the actual AU! Warning for VERY suggestive and some dark stuff ye, and also feel free to send asks and ask me stuff about this boi and the au because I am very willing to share! UwU ❤

So, firstly I got to admit that this is more like an uh, for example, coffee shop au than like an au au if you catch my drift. EaseSwap do not have much in common when it comes to either Underlöst or like Undertale overall in fact, only the characters but swapped, which usually isn’t the way I usually go with my au’s, as usually they have way more elements from the original game than this, but this time around I ended up doing it much more differently and I am sticking with it!

This au, or more like story, happens in a world/universe where there has never been a monster human war, the monsters have never gotten defeated and locked up behind a barrier under a mountain, instead, humans and monsters lives peacefully with one another on the surface.

This a pretty like modern world like real life modern kind of deal, and in turn so will there be many things and subjects based on real life be appearing in this, especially sex, mental health and so on.

But in this story we will be following Mello, who lives in a small basement apartment where he runs a clinic of sorts, as he works as a so called sex worker therapist/massager person, I know that’s not a real thing but this be fiction and I do what I wanna.

Anyway, Mello works as a sex therapist, where he uses his skills of being amazing at massages, being extremely good at reading people and psychology etc, to help his clients/patients to properly relax, get all that tense shit out of their bodies and make them feel way better both body and mind, which at times involves sex since having sex etc usually results in ppl be relaxed af afterward.

He does not have sex with all of his patients, it’s something he after properly talking with them and so on decides if it is something they need or not, sometimes it is sometimes it isn’t. It all vary to person to person and also what his clients/patients is okay with and so on.

Anyhow, this au follows Mello as he lives his life, helps his patients/clients etc, while things from his very rowdy past gets revealed and some trouble and drama and so on be happening.

I am not sure exactly just yet how this will be properly told, might become like a reader insert fic of some kind or maybe end up shipping Mello with someone, as that’s the kind of story this is and how it will work the best I believe, but now onto Mello himself, here’s some facts:

He is very similar to how my Stretch is, but yet not, but they got the whole wanting to help people, being hella chill, kind and very jokey in common, just that Mello knows when he is taking on too much of other people’s problems and is able to say no properly and so on.

Might not appear like it but he is very professional when it comes to his job, can appear as a bit of a slob at times but he is taking his job of helping his patients/clients very seriously.

He can see kinda okay without his glasses, but he is supposed to always wear them, but yet he constantly lose them even though he got those straps to help him keep an eye on them.

Is very cute, very friendly and befriends people, get them to open up with ease, he is just a very trustable guy. Is a tad bit messy, a bit all over the place and a tad bit chaotic, does some weird shit which I haven’t decided on fully yet, likes to read and play video games allot.

Feel guilty for things he have done in the past, but is doing his best to focus on the here and now and the future, but one thing he just can’t stop being guilty about is an incident involving his brother, which he desperately wish he could have changed, since then his brother might still have been around.

And that is all ya get for now, feel free to send me asks about Mello and this au yes :>c

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yanderecrazysie · 2 years

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Have you ever thought about making the reader a bit smarter? Maybe even make her as cunning enough to avoid her yandere admirer and it's just one big mind game, no winners and losers yet. If not I don't blame you, I ain't got the brains to make a plot like that too.

I always feel like it'd be easy to ignore warning signs because, unless you're famous, why would someone be after little old me? Surely no one would be so in love with me that they'd go to any length to have me! That'd be totally crazy and unlikely!

But if you are famous, in a relationship with the yandere, the yandere's obvious af, or you're naturally suspicious/paranoid, it would make sense to want to avoid the yandere ofc!

If it were me, I'd do my best to act like nothing's out of the ordinary, but make secret plans to leave. Or, have a recorder on me at all times, ready to catch them in the act.

There are also some good tips about being kidnapped I learned: If you're being dragged away, try to leave something behind to show the path. Slip off a piece of jewelry while you're being taken away, then a shoe, then the other, then a sock, etc.

I've always wanted to read a story where the reader isn't completely oblivious and I once had plans to make a non-fanfiction story where the reader is an ex-delinquent and is naturally good at picking up on red flags and super badass, so the yanderes have a very, very difficult time trying to obtain her LOL

I'll try to make a story where the reader is more cunning, because this is giving me some ideas eeee like I can picture a yandere Tanaka/Nishinoya/Hinata/Goshiki/Bokuto from Haikyuu or Izuku/Kaminari/Awase/Manual from BNHA/MHA and some others being really, really obvious about their crush and putting the reader on edge.

Maybe the reader catches them staring all the time or slipping gifts in their locker or sees them following her home. She just knows that something's wrong and she has no intention whatsoever of sticking around to figure out what. She's ready to catch them red-handed while making sure they can't go to desperate measures to take her down with them.

Even if she puts them behind bars though, they aren't going to just let go. The minute they are released/escape, the reader will be on edge again. A restraining order isn't exactly a fool-proof protection after all.

#yandere #yandere thoughts #yandere haikyuu #yandere my hero academia

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justmemethings · 2 years

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Salty AF Mun’s PSAs

A collection of pet peeves & behaviours we hate to see in the RPC

#1: Don’t neglect your other writing partners just because you have a favourite mutual

Let’s take a moment to be honest with ourselves. We all have (or have had at some point) a favourite mutual. It’s normal, because sometimes you just meet a person you click insanely well with and all you want to do is basking into the fun and the excitement that kind of connection brings to you.

All this is good and right...up until it sours the RPing experience for the people around you.

Everyone has the right to tailor their RP experience to their needs and preferences. This is a hobby, not a job, and you don’t owe anyone anything but the basic level of human decency and respect. So, having a favourite mutual is valid and a wonderful experience when the feeling is mutual, but this doesn’t give you the right to treat your other writing partners as mere distractions for when that particular person isn’t around.

What you’re more than entitled to do:

Enjoy your relationship with your favourite mutual in all the possible shapes and form

Prioritise your threads with them, because you obviously have more muse for your interactions

Offer them your most wanted plotlines before anyone else. You have the best chemistry, so it’s a natural choice

Make things for them (edits, moodboards, etc) whenever you feel like and tag them in all the sort of posts that reminds you of your interactions with them

What isn’t fair for you to do:

Put obviously less thought and effort in all the answers that are not for your favourite mutual. Your other partners are still dedicating their time and energies to your threads, they deserve to the same.

Related to the above. Even if you are more than allowed to prioritize the threads you have with your mutuals, don’t relegate answering to your other threads only to when your favourite isn’t available or when you are bored. Your other partners are still making efforts and putting their excitement in the threads you have with them, so it is just fair to keep offering them more or less regular replies, according to your IRL engagements.

Openly gush on dash about how amazing they are compared to everyone else. That’s just plainly rude.

Post wishlist ideas in the hope that your favourite mutual will notice them and dismiss or straight out ignore anyone else who might show interest in said plots. Again, rude.

Neglect to send memes or show any kind of interest in general to your other partners, while you constantly do it for your favourite. Favouring someone is understandable, ignoring everyone else for them is hurtful and unfair.

Probably more could be added to this list, but the bottom line to remember is: whatever you do, never forget to respect others’ efforts and feelings. How? It’s easy. Try to think about how you would feel in their shoes.

#psa #rp psa #rp suggestions #rp rules #rp etiquette #salty af mun series #owl's psa

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jiyeonws · 2 years

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( HELLO again! It’s ya girl, Ash, and I’m here to introduce my second muse — AHN JIYEON, Ladybug’s Main Vocal & Face. I’ve linked some helpful pages for those who want to get to know her a little bit, and below the cut are some key points about her life and such if you can’t be bothered to read all the big stuff (though the information below is not brief by any means asdfghjkl). I will also have some quick plot ideas below. Go ahead and smack that HEART button if you want me to send you a message, or alternatively send me one if you’d like to plot! I will probably respond more quickly to messages on Taejoon’s blog, but send to whichever you prefer! )

BIO. / PROFILE. / CAREER. / PLOTS.

BACKGROUND.

— Jiyeon was born on August 1, 1992. She is currently old af 29 years old. — Her parents split when she was a toddler, but she had/has regular contact with her father. She was raised by her mother. — When she was five, she was scouted by an acting/modeling agent while out shopping with her mother. — After signing, she started with modeling gigs that turned into acting gigs. — Throughout her childhood, she was cast in multiple dramas, and later, movies. — She decided when she was a little older that she wanted to get better at singing (she already had natural talent) and she wanted to become an idol. — She was approached by an agent from Yuseong after someone at one of her shoots heard her singing in her dressing room. Homie went behind her back and basically did all the work to get her an audition. — She aced her audition in January 2009 and became a trainee with Yuseong. The start of her training was ✨rough✨ because sis couldn’t dance, but she’s a quick learner and was able to manage. — She debuted with Ladybug in September 2012 (age 20). — She participated in lots of variety shows after debut and worked her ass off to live up to the name of face of the group. One of her favorite shows to take part in was We Got Married. — When Ladybug was put on hiatus, Jiyeon was pissed, but continued her grind and picked up more acting/modeling opportunities to keep her and Ladybug’s names relevant (she even participated in her first musical, Mamma Mia!). — She’s relieved now that Ladybug is finally getting some attention from Yuseong but she fears that their time together is limited at this point.

PERSONALITY/FACTS.

— She is a Leo. Personality type ENFJ-T. — She speaks Korean and English fluently! Her mother was born and raised in California and raised Jiyeon to be bilingual. She is a beginner in Japanese. — She is very outgoing. It’s easy for her to make friends with people quickly, and she has a knack for making people feel welcomed and special. — She gets really uncomfortable during awkward silences. — She has a lot of friends and acquaintances. She just loves to surround herself with people. — She’s very critical of herself and picks apart literally everything she does. — She’s a big workaholic and it’s kind of known that she prefers it that way a lot of the time. As of late, though, she’s been needing a little more time to recharge. Probably because she’s getting old — She’s gained a lot of skills over the years, and she’s the type to become an expert at almost everything she puts her mind to. She takes a lot of pride in it as well.

PLOTS / CONNECTIONS.

— Best friends/close friends — Younger idols/trainees who look up to her — People who live in the same apartment building/nearby/neighbors, etc. — An ex-lover (any gender, ‘96+) — A present lover (any gender, ‘96+) — A crush/celebrity crush — A past acquaintance or friend she hasn’t seen in a long time — Someone who builds a very deep connection with her, whether it’s platonic or romantic — People who are fans of Ladybug. Bonus points if Jiyeon is their bias bc she would probably cry — A younger idol who has named her as their ideal type?? — Someone that is shipped with Jiyeon by fans?? That could be fun — Fellow Yuseong idols/trainees/staff to feature in vlive shenanigans

#「 안지연. 」 → out of character.#ws:intro

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djmarinizelablog · 3 years

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hi! read your last ask and you said that you took up creative writing classes so you might have a wider knowledge about this but i was wondering when u mentioned different writing styles (like minimalistic, hightened imagery, linear vilennete and all of that) could you maybe explain the difference and what they really mean and maybe examples in our own levihan nation and writers? this might be asking for too much but i was pretty lost and i'd like to know more about all that. however you are def free to ignore this too!

Did you just ask me to write a comprehensive poetics essay, Anon? (I love writing about writing lmao)

Super long post ahead, and I’ll be citing certain fanfics that I’ve read so far and those that I think somehow exemplifies all the different writing styles I mentioned in the previous post.

First off, the ones I listed beforehand (minimalistic prose, heightened imagery, poetic language, linear narrative, non-linear vignettes) aren’t the only types of writing styles. There are more if you consider the variations of tone (humor/comedy, sentimental, macabre, noir etc), narration/perspective (first person, second person, third person omniscient/limited), and language (dialogue-heavy or action/scene-driven). And the nice thing is that you can actually use of one or two of them in your work---or all of them, if you’re feeling bold.

As Hange always loves to do: “Let’s experiment!”

--------

I’ll start with minimalistic prose. It is what it is: short, clear, and concise. Think less is more. You have an economy with words where you disregard most adverbs and focus more on the context to make way for meaning, thus allowing the readers to create their own interpretations of your writing. I think the method here is to write your intended draft first, and then cut the unnecessary words to flesh out the scene even more.

Notice how @stereobone wrote this paragraph of Black Dog (an Eruri fic):

Isabel's voice wakes him, brother, brother, has him sitting upright in bed and grabbing for the knife under his mattress. He braces himself for the attack before he realizes there isn't one. There is nothing in the darkness but him and his heavy, panicked breathing. Levi's heart feels like it's trying to beat its way out of his chest. He drops the knife on the mattress and shuts his eyes and tries not to think about Farlan's bloody resigned face before he was eaten. He tries not to think about how he left them. How it's his fault.

It’s very simplistic in language; the paragraph lets you focus on Levi’s innermost thoughts while he deals with an external action (ie, having nightmares). The author hasn’t unraveled the rest of the plot yet, but you already know where the tension is coming from.

Next is heightened imagery. If you’re familiar with the different figures of speech (metaphor, simile, personification, hyperbole, etc), then this is where they all come into play. I think the challenge here is being able to balance it well with the text itself and make sure that the imagery actually clarifies the context of the paragraph instead of convoluting the intended meaning.

Here’s an excerpt from A Dangerous Game by just_quintessentially_me:

Hanji watched Levi, standing there, head bent and bloodied handkerchief pressed against his arm, and was reminded, irrationally, of a night years ago. When her parents had taken her to the circus. [. . . .] Holding her parent’s hands, she’d gaped, head craned back as she watched the spectacle, a cacophonous mixture of sound and color. At the center of it all, she’d spied a boy. Among the twisting colors and tricks, he alone, was still. [. . . .] The boy was high above, balancing on a platform atop a long pole. In front of him, stretched an audaciously thin rope. Below, no net waited to catch him.

[. . . .]

When Levi looked up, his expression was set - like the boy before the tightrope. And she knew, with sinking certainty, he was going to take the step. Into thin air.

Gray eyes met her gaze and held it.

“Yeah. I’ll go.”

At the door, Kenny smiled.

See how the powerful imagery of the boy on the tightrope was able to fuel the tension in that moment among Levi, Hange, and Kenny?

I think poetic language is akin to heightened imagery, except that the former is more focused on the actual language. It’s very lyrical, wherein you can actually hear the lulling song of the sentences in a rhythm. One of my favorite works that does this is Deep sea baby by @smallblip. Here she makes use of various setting and scenery to create this entire atmosphere of Levi and Hange’s relationship:

Hanji knows whatever life they've led, this is her favourite.

The one in which her and Levi see the sea for the first time together.

The one in which she’s the Commander, and him, her Captain. And between them, a river of words left unsaid threatening to break the banks.

One day they must cross the ocean, but today they visit the shores again, without the kids this time. And Levi learns why when he watches her peel at her clothes. Her harness comes off first, then her blouse, then everything else, like a little dance for an audience of one. Levi tries not to stare, but he’s already seen her by candlelight in the dead of the night. And yet she never fails to take his breath away.

She makes her way to where the white foams dredge the past up the shores of the present.

"Come on Levi! The water is warm!" she says, and he hears it like a call to come home- where the heavens collide with the sea.

He takes off his clothes and folds them in a neat pile beside Hanji's mess. He swims out to join her.

It’s hauntingly poetic, the way the author is able to connect the metaphor in “a river of words” to the actual body of water right in front of Levi and Hange. Good poetic language is able to tighten up the texts together while keeping the sentence structure flowing with apt figures of speech.

When it comes to narratives, it only comes down to linear or non-linear. See how @lostcauses-noregrets does her opening statement in Trains (also an Eruri fic):

Levi hates trains. To be fair, Levi hates all forms of public transport, but he reserves a particular loathing for trains. They’re dirty, noisy, smelly and worse, filled with people. People who, heaven forbid, might attempt to speak to Levi, engage him in conversation. Levi’s worst nightmare is being stuck on a train with some friendly fuck who wants to pass the time making small talk. Admittedly it’s not a problem he has to deal with too often, his general fuck off demeanour deters all but the most aggressively friendly and hopelessly inebriated. But that doesn’t stop Levi from hating trains.

It’s a short fic and it’s very dependent on the linearity of events happening. But with that banger of a first sentence, the beginning already gives you enough of an idea of Levi’s pet peeve in the story, which in this case, is trains.

Here’s another hot and steamy fic called keep him waiting by keobuns that shows a linear narrative:

He’s sitting with them in the back of the lab, nursing a cup of tea — it’s still pretty full, and even cold now, for he was far too distracted listening to Hanji talk to properly drink — when he sees it. Hanji’s too preoccupied with overexplaining the same Titan experiment they’ve gone over a hundred times to notice his stare. They just continue on and on and on, gesturing with their hands, pointing with their fingers, flexing their wrists…

Ah. Levi has to bring his teacup to his lips to hide the way his lips tremble. Hanji has incredibly nice hands.

The entire story just revolves around Levi simping for Hange’s hands and how it all goes down from there. But you as a reader are kept wanting more with every paragraph and every sentence that the author constructs (and trust me, it’s not just the sexual tension between Levi and Hange that keeps us going).

Now, as much as I love the straightforwardness of linear prose, non-linear writing brings a different round of ideas onto the table. It can create recollections from flashbacks, heighten the perspective or interior turmoil of a character due to trauma or grief, or even just re-invent what-if scenes that the characters have imagined themselves.

Gnossiene by @thatalmondgirl is one of my all-time favorite Rivetra fics. In this excerpt, you will see how she switches between the past and the present, and how it affects Petra’s POV as a conflicted character:

Contrary to popular belief (fuck Auruo) Petra actually didn’t cry easily.

Alright, she could admit that at some times, she was...emotional. It was far from a weakness, but even she could admit that they sometimes got in the way and walled off all rational thought. Anger, frustration, sadness, hell, even happiness. The only one she could easily compartmentalise away was fear, which probably stemmed from her military career. Even so. It was never easy to separate all the others from her actions, think from a clean slate like the Commander could do, like the captain. [. . . ] Petra groaned, splayed out across her bed. She drew her arm across her eyes, willing the tears to go away. She’d already blown through her tissue box.

“Petra, a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.” Mama sat on the end of her bed, with Petra on the floor between her legs. Even though Petra argued firmly that she was old enough to brush her own hair, Mama had insisted. Unfortunately, Petra wasn’t old enough - and probably never would be - to disagree with her mother.

“I know, Mama.” Petra grumbled.

“I don’t think you do. Else you wouldn’t be crying, would you?”

[. . . .]

“But a man shouldn’t complete you when you complete yourself. Maybe he’s an extension to your house. So you’ll be sad if the extension is compromised or burns down. But you still have the main house. And if it’s strong, the main house can still be standing even after the worst storm.”

Aside from Mama’s crazy metaphors that sometimes didn’t make sense, her message hit home. Even if it hit home years later.

See how it switched in between the before and after?

An off-shoot of non-linear writing are vignettes (a layering of scenes separated by section breaks) wherein this writing style allows writers to curate scenes in terms of fragments, creating some kind of mosaic for the readers once they finally see the big picture. Nakimochiku’s I’m leaving, are you coming with me? stacks up scenes of interactions between Levi and Hange, enough to depict the kind of relationship that they have as young lovers in a school setting. You can string these fragments together, rearrange them in a different order, but in the end, you will still get the author's clear goal of highlighting how Levi and Hange’s relationship develops over time.

Those are the styles that I mentioned in my previous posts, but as I’ve told you, there’s more to writing than those, so I’ll give a short run-through of other methods in writing.

Whether it’s dialogue-heavy works such as from my window to yours, or action-driven scenes like Carnivores (a Levi x Reader fic by CaptainDegenerate) that propel the story forward, we as readers should be able to follow through the actual storyline that the authors intend to take us.

A third-person limited (we listen to Hange’s thoughts in Clockwork by @tundrainafrica) vis-à-vis an all-knowing/omniscient narration (the moon is dark by @sayonarasanity alternates the perspective of Levi and Hange) should be able to make us understand why the author chose this particular kind of point-of-view in order to tell the story.

And lastly, having a solid and consistent tone throughout the work (the macabre of Even Humanity’s Strongest could make mistakes by Rimeko versus the sweet sentimentality of Flowers for You by @fanmoose12) should be able to set the atmosphere that the authors want us to imbibe as we read through their works.

So there’s your crash course on writing and reading. Enjoy? :)

#levihan #writing #fanfic #fanfictions #fanfiction #ao3 #djmarinizela #mine

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thetaoofbetty · 3 years

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I keep seeing way too many BA's saying that Cole and lili don't have chemistry & I have to scratch my head at that. There's no denying that KJ & Lili have chemistry but to me what they have is the chemistry of easy old friends. There's a clear familiarity to their chemistry which I think people keep misreading as being explicitly romantic. Now, betty and jug have a great foundation of friendship in their chemistry but what they have on top of that is romantic/sexual tension.

and i think kj and lili can pull it off, but that they’re not supposed to. i think ba is supposed to radiate a friendly/tender energy. sometimes to me it feels like they’re siblings. two moments i saw some strong physical chemistry between them was in their 4.17 kiss and the 5.06 scene before the car sex, when they’re making plans to hook up. But most of the time The chemistry between KJ & Lili is warm & friendly but it also gives the clue that a supposed B*rchie 'romance' wouldn't last long and it didn't also there's more chemistry on some bh scenes just talking that all the ba explicit scenes.

oh hell, i think caring about what the b/as say is way past its prime. their arguments are almost always made in bad faith. they hated jughead until they found someone not betty to say he was amazing together with. because he was toxic in high school, right? but they love him as adult (who wrote a whole book about his high school sweetheart but i don’t think they like remembering that fact) or whatever it is they’re saying.

listen, there’s no point in fighting with a wall. people can ship whatever they want. that they feel the need to justify it (rip one character down to prop up the other, make it performative, say some rude af shit about one woman to make themselves feel better, etc) is on them. we can explain why bughead personally appeals to us all day long and the only people who are going to ever care are the ones who already agree with us.

and to honest, biased opinions are never going to be truly objective. no one is immune from that. listen, i don’t even know how long cole and lili dated (years? right?) but you don’t date people you don’t have personal chemistry with for years so the idea that they have none is silly. everyone on the show has some degree of chemistry with each other, some more than others.

and it’s subjective. and depends on what you like.

i personally think kj has better chemistry with someone when he’s got a scene partner that archie is platonic with vs his romantic scene partners. this is my personal opinion. people who are super invested in varchie see something i don’t. that’s okay! i just want veronica to have whatever she wants and she wants archie so go get your man, girl.

and i think that the stark difference between the shower scene™/the car scene and the other hookups were on purpose. which is still just my opinion. because the difference between an impromptu hookup/the thrill of it and when you start making it about distracting yourself is pretty clear. the b/as can say they love all the hookup scenes and that’s fine, we lost our minds when bughead said hey to each other (superior interaction in my opinion), but i think the difference is visible by the end of 5x06, tbh.

we’re all just petty in the end, yeah? they say they have no chemistry because they don’t like the ship. they say so and so has more chemistry because that ship gets jughead away from betty. half of their arguments are taken from out of context things (a popular thing in fandom—ask me how i know) and then used to prop up whatever their opinion of the day is.

we’re talking about the people (and others) who immediately jumped on jughead after loooooving him before because he hallucinated betty from the last time they were together and friendzoned their convenience ship. then they attacked bugheads for liking that scene? the emotional significance of it was huge for the plot going forward and trying to shame people for understanding that was just a big neon sign of “uh oh, we’re fucked” and they know it.

these arguments? we’ve already heard them. the one thing b/as never are? is original.

#besos!#anti-barchie #long post #anonymous

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its-chelisey-stuff · 3 years

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Guardian eps 31-40... I knew what was coming and still shed tears lol

So... Yeah, that happened. At the start of these last ten eps, ShenWei was being kept as a hostage (chained up to a pillar and everything, so kinky) by his brother and Yunlan had to deal with a bunch of craziness and somehow ended up being a person of interest/a fugitive and there was even some sort of car chase in there. Yunlan ended up rescuing his boyfriend and at least him and ShenWei had some happy shippy moments before doom fell upon them.

I'll be honest and say I could, more or less, follow the plot of the drama for at least the first half, but on this last quarter everything was bananas borderline ridiculous for me. I was kinda disappointed that Yunlan wasn't really Kunlun's reincarnation while in the novel he is and the way they explained the “I waited 10000 years for you” hmmmmmm but I guess that fell under censorship territory? Which makes me confused, because they did allow the time travel thing and I thought that was banned as well? I shouldn't think too hard about this lol not because of the nonsense of the story but because censors are so often inconsistent and an enigma, basically. Their spectrum is wide and mysterious, like a black box.

The acting

And to be honest I finished this for BaiYu and ZhuYilong because well, God knows I wanted to give up a few times but whenever those two were on screen, together, I'd go like "oh damn, they're both hot af and so freaking talented and I really cannot look away from this mess. I owe it to them" and so, that was exactly what I did. It wasn't that big of a sacrifice to be honest (the masters of sacrifices were our two leading men 💔😭) but damn, what do you call it when you know something bad is gonna happen that's gonna make you suffer and still go through with it, enjoying every moment? Because that's what I had from the start hahahaha

Anyway, the most important bit for me was the romance. I can't even be funny or play coy anymore and pretend to call it a bromance, after how blatantly obvious it was demonstrated that it wasn't that, AT ALL, to the last freaking second of the drama! Yeah! That last scene?? Ummhm excuse me your honor of censorship, these men are in love and so gay for each other! You could see it in their eyes, you could feel it in the tension between them and it could be read between the lines (without much effort) in their last words to one another! And it squeezed my heart with their angstiness and heartbreak. The actors even said that they did read the novel and I mean, no wonder because those longing looks and all that flirtiness couldn’t have come from them just from reading the script because it wasn’t that good

That ending

I have no idea why the drama had such a bittersweet ending (I chose to call it that because they made a promise to meet again) when the novel definitely didn’t have that feel, at all. The ending of the novel gave a feel of hope, a new beginning, good prevailing over bad, love conquers all etc and Yunlan regained all his memories and powers as Kunlun!! How epic is that?. And the extras? It’s basically just confirming all that along with HEA for OTP. It was *chef’s kiss*

(And like some sort of twsited cosmic joke lol I finished Guardian on the same day Cherry magic ended and wow it's not easy to see one OTP get their sweet happily ever after, while your other OTP it's given death and tears, a truly memorable Christmas Eve for me lmao)

I don’t recommend it... except I do lol

When it comes to recommending this drama, I think I wouldn't do it BUT I'd definitely recommend watching BaiYu and ZhuYilong acting alongside each other lol I know it sounds like the same thing, but it isn't. You could ff all of the things that don't have the two and it would be a joyful watch without missing anything important from the lol “story”. Now, I don't think it's always a good idea to watch a drama merely for the main couple and their chemistry but if somehow that can carry you through the whole thing, I guess it's a worthy ride. In my case, it was. And this drama has been my second time doing that haha

So, not a waste of my time and I mean I'm a fan of both actors now and I'm ready to check out some more projects of them (especially BaiYu's, because holy cow, I don't know what is it about him but my hormones go crazy when I see him on my screen 🙈😍)

Anyway, thanks Guardian, for breaking my heart, thanks for that CRAZY chemistry, the fun dynamic between the leads and those longing looks... Well, basically, thanks for putting Zhu Yilong and BaiYu in the same drama🤣. It was a delight. Also, I really really liked the novel.

#guardian #zhen hun #cdrama #zhu yilong #bai yu #zhao yunlan #shen wei #weilan #sigh if only they had been allowed to do the story right #with all the fantasy and mythology elements #even without the BL theme #it could have been a masterpiece #also if only they had a bigger budget lol #bai yu and zyl saved the drama

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pebblysand · 3 years

Text

of breakable clay [extended author's notes on chapter viii of castles]

oh my god. it’s out. jesus christ.

okay first off, before i dive into anything, i know i’ve already done this in the actual a/n but i would like to wholeheartedly thank @whiffingbooks over on discord for helping me with figuring out the structure of things fic. although i have to admit i did not, at all, do what i told you i would do, talking it out was massively helpful in figuring this one out, so thanks a million. secondly, i would like send all of my most sincere and affectionate thanks to @whizzfizz on here, who mother-of-god basically designed this entire chapter and listened to me rant, and rant, and rant about it for days on end without complaining. i’ll go into a bit more depth later on, but THANK YOU.

now, a few facts on this chapter before i dive further in:

wordcount: 19168. i legit would apologise for this but i promised i wouldn’t so i’m not going to. that’s growing up people. don’t apologise for yourselves haha.

soundtrack: so i’ve never mentioned this but each chapter kind of has a soundtrack? like a song that i listened to on loop while writing this. here, i would basically point you to the entire spotify of a band called barns courtney (there’s one album and a few eps), i basically listened to all of their songs on loop this past month. i feel like they have such a strong gryffindor energy, in the good, the bad and the ugly. this chapter is definitely sort of an ode to gryffindors so their music was a very big inspo. if i had to point you to one song, it would probably be dopamine.

favourite line: ‘I dig my fingernails into the inside of my palms and it feels like the blood that comes out is already boiling.’

what is this chapter about? now, that’s an easy one. survival.

okay, now, spoilers under the cut.

ugh. holy fucking shit. i’m actually at a stage right now where i strongly believe that no one on earth will want to read this because everyone probably hates me right now for the choices that i made, especially after i made you wait almost three months for this shit. i always feel like whatever i’ve put out was the hardest chapter to write so far but this one was really out there in terms of struggles - i’m really sorry it took so long, but here we are.

there are reasons, though. first, as i said in my may round up, i didn’t really start writing this until about a month ago, because a lot of things were happening in my life that i needed to take care of. i took exams (which i passed!!!!), my mum had a health emergency, ireland added france to their mandatory quarantine list (it has been removed as of yesterday thank. fucking. christ) and i started a new job. it was a lot.

anyway, this being said, when i did get to writing this chapter, as mentioned above in the thank-you section, i kind of first struggled with the structure of it. now, you will see this is a recurring theme this time around but for this, my instincts were telling me one thing, and my brain was saying something else.

basically, what came first here wasn’t the actual content of ginny’s letters (more on that, obviously, in a minute) but the ‘mood’ i wanted for the chapter. i wanted to recreate, both for harry and for the reader, this sort of idea of being completely immersed in a book or a story. like, you know the kind of mood where reality just kind of blends out, where you start reading something and just. cannot. stop. i don’t think he’s much a reader (at least not canonically) and so i wanted this to take him by surprise, for her to take over his life with her words. i explained in the previous a/n [link] i chose to have ginny’s war be told through letters (basically, i thought it would be the best way to narratively tell her story), and i really wanted harry to experience what she’d lived through almost first hand.

now, interestingly, my idea for how to do this originally was to have the letters sort of be interwoven into the events of 1999, throughout the next couple of chapters (meaning this one and chapter nine). i had this idea in my head of him living through ‘real life’ things but not being able to take his mind off her letters, with the letters also sort of echoing the events that were happening in 99, etc. having the two plot lines develop at once and meet in the middle, kind of.

and i tried to write that. for a long time. spoiler alert, it didn’t work. i think the reason is that every time i sat down with it, i felt like i was doing a disservice to both stories. i mean: 97/98 is important, but 99 also is, you know? and by taking the narrative in and out all the time, it was like you couldn’t concentrate on one thing. it was just very messy and didn’t have the intensity i was originally aiming for because it kept being dragged out of whatever was the main action at the time. i wanted harry to get sucked into the narrative, for her letters to take over his life, but in the end, the impression i just got was that the whole thing was confusing af. instead of deeply caring about both, i couldn’t bring myself to care either for ginny’s story, or for his.

also, i just kept hitting a wall: a wall called harry. basically, i knew that the next two chapters (i.e. eight and nine) would stretch from january 99 to june 99. and for the love of god, no matter how many times i turned it around in my head, there was - to me - no way that harry as we know him would just pace himself to read her letters throughout all those months. like, harry fucking potter isn’t the kind of guy who ‘paces’ himself. he’s the kind of guy who doesn’t sleep for a week to get through it all, you know? this is everything that he’s wanted to know since last may, he’s been desperately looking for answers up to this point, there is absolutely not way in hell that he’d wait it out nicely until june. it felt ooc to have him read the letters over a few months. and i just kept hitting that wall over and over. i considered, at one point, building him reading the letters into flashbacks but flashbacks of flashbacks were, again, quite messy, and i don’t think her letters would ever be something he’d volunteer to re-read, so. clearly, it wasn’t working.

then, i think on a random sunday a few weeks ago, i just went back to the drawing board and was like: okay, say we just write all of the letters and go from there, what would happen? by the end of the day, i’d written 12,000 words and that was that, really.

now, the second difficulty, once i’d decided that was…. what you all probably want me to talk about.

i know this is probably not what you want to hear but: i didn’t really plan this? like, i understand that a lot of people have sort of a headcanon about what happened to ginny in that year in hogwarts but i … don’t. like, as planned as this fic is (which it is, i know where i’m going, i promise) that was always a bit of a blank-space-tbd in my head. i think that this story, as hinny as it is, is mostly about harry. and while i knew what i wanted for harry from her telling her story (for him to get sucked in, for him to realise that his war wasn’t the only war in the world ‘cause he’s been bloody self-centered so far, for him to realise that his plan to protect her didn’t exactly work because it didn’t cater for who she is, etc.), i wasn’t really sure what that story was. i mean, i knew it was going to be bad and traumatic, obviously, but i didn’t know what would happen. and still, to me, what i wrote is a version of that year. it’s not really my headcanon (i still don’t really have one), and i definitely accept other versions, if that makes sense.

this being said, i obviously had thought about it a little. i remember writing chapter one with that line: ‘They have sex for the first time, that day – his first time and it feels like hers, too, but he wouldn’t dare ask, not anymore, anyways’ and thinking i wanted to leave the door open. to me, it was a door completely open: it could have indeed been her first time, or she could have seen someone else (consensually) during that year, or she could have been assaulted. i honestly didn’t know but yeah, that was always a possibility in the back of my head.

then, to tell you the truth, when i wrote the first version of this chapter (the 12,000 words i mentioned earlier), it wasn’t there. i sat down and decided that i wasn’t going to go there. firstly, because, while you probably don’t know this, i’ve written about sexual assault before. my previous long fic, children, in another fandom, dealt (in part) with that. and i didn’t want to be the-fic-writer-who-writes-about-sexual-assault. especially because trust me, there are people who are a lot more legitimate to talk about this than i am. i also didn’t feel like it was necessary to the story, i could do without it and still explain ginny’s early behaviour in the fic, explain her trauma, and have harry realise the things i talked about before. secondly, i’ll be honest: i know this isn’t what people in this fandom want to read. the hinny pairing is mostly about love and fluff (which i love, btw, don’t get me wrong) and i was like, ugh, i don’t want to face the angry comments. i’m writing this a/n the morning before posting so i admittedly don’t know what the reaction will be but i do anticipate a lot of annoyance with me. i knew that a lot of people wouldn’t like it if i went there, and it was just easier not to.

but then, as i started editing, there was a comment (and this, ladies and gentlemen, is a testament to how much your comments fucking matter, okay?). a comment that i remembered reading on the previous chapter and could not get out of my head, no matter how much i tried. well, hello, @whizzfizz. i’ll happily give credit where credit is due. it read:

This made me think of something you mentioned earlier in the fic (possibly Ch1) about Harry not being sure if he was Ginny’s first but that it felt like it. I wonder if this is something that is going to come up in her letters to him.

and, so, it turned. around and around in my head, and i couldn’t get it out. and i kept saying to myself: no, you’re not going there. no, you’re not going there. and then, one night, i caved. i was like, fuck, i need to know if this person really meant what i think they meant by this. and so we talked. a lot. and, i did a lot of thinking. about women. about wars. about violence against women as a an inevitable weapon of war. about ginny being harry’s girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend (more on that later), and what that would have meant in their world. and @whizzfizz, you said something that in the end really sold me. you said: ‘at this point, i don’t think it would be realistic for it not to have happened.’ and, that was that, really.

because i was right, initially. amycus/ginny (ugh, the idea of a pairing makes me throw up in my mouth a little but yeah, there it is) isn’t necessary to the story. but i believe it to be necessary to what this story is trying to show. the plot held well without it, no questions asked. 12,000 words of the da and their battles, of ginny’s rebellions. it was fine. but i think i wanted more than fine. to me (and i appreciate how fucking pretentious that is, please slap me in the face *eyeroll*), castles is more than its plot. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: this is about what is behind ‘all was well.’ it’s about trying to paint a realistic picture of their lives. and that includes the war. and realistically, as far as i’m concerned, knowing how humans fight their wars, knowing our history and the history of violence against women construed as a weapon in literally every conflict there ever was, there is no way that this didn’t happen. ginny says it herself: for us girls, it’s just the way wars are fought.

so, i did go there. and the whole fandom probably hates me for going there, but i sort of stand by it, i have to say. to be honest, on a sort of subconscious level, i kind of wonder: didn’t i always know i was going to go there? like, this fits perfectly into the plot to the point that i think it was probably in my head for much longer than i care to admit. now, i’m so, fucking excited to write next chapter because i finally get to write happy things, and hinny getting back together on rock solid foundations of openness and sharing, and trust, and i’m so, so glad. there are a couple of scenes in the next chapter that i’ve been working towards for months and i’m so, bloody excited to write them. everyone might hate me and i might just be writing this fic for myself now (lol), but again, i stand by the decisions i took. to me, it fits.

phew. okay, now that huge thing is out of the way and explained, here are a few more jumbled thoughts:

the more i think about it, the more i think that my reason for not wanting to be the-fic-writer-who-writes-about-sexual-assault is a bit ridic. children and castles, in that way, are so, so different. like, i appreciate the overlap between the silk fandom and the hp fandom is probably ridiculously small but if you’ve read both stories, they’re obviously very different. one thing that both stories centre on, though, is consent. and to me, that’s probably the most interesting element of ginny/amycus, and the most interesting element of writing characters within a restrictive pov, rather than an omniscient one. like, do i think ginny/amycus is rape? yes. 100%. do i think that ginny thinks it’s rape? that is a much more interesting question. she says it a number of times but i think to her, this is all about control. i think that because of what happened to her with tom, she’s someone who is terrified of losing control of her mind and of her own agency. so as not to lose that, she’s willing to do whatever it takes. it is a ‘you can control my body, but not my thoughts,’ sort of narrative. and, she never says it outright because i think psychologically she’s just not there yet, but tom is everywhere in these letters. and as her world just spirals out, she hangs onto the very few things that she can control: her relationship to harry, and her willingness to do what it takes for them to survive. she initiates the ‘relationship’ with amycus in an attempt to control her fate. later, as she explains to harry she feels a lot of guilt over what she did, and like a lot of sexual assault survivors, she thinks it was her responsibility. because i’m in harry’s head most of the time for this fic, i’m not sure i’ll ever really get to discuss that at length, but it’s definitely something that i wanted to show. another interesting question is: does harry think it’s rape? i think at that point in the fic, he doesn’t have the education, nor the vocabulary for that. i think instinctively (because he is someone who is very instinctive), he doesn’t blame her. if he blames anyone, it’s probably himself. he understands the necessity to do what you have to do to survive and thinks that no, no matter what she claims, that was not consented. that’s kind of what comes out in his annoyingly inarticulate letter to her at the end. beyond that, though, i think he’s a bit lost, just like she is.

on a mildly related note, there is something that i've been seeing a lot in the comments and that i feel like i should maybe address? namely: harry's reaction to ginny dating other people. i assume similar comments will be made about his reaction to ginny/alecto (meaning that he still decides to write to her, at the end of the chapter). i've seen a lot of people observe that he's much more 'chill' about it in castles than in canon. fair point but is he, though? like, he isn't happy about it in castles. and he's jealous as well. but he was never entitled in canon. he was jealous, yes, the chest monster and all that, but he never really did anything about it, and never really impeded on her right to see other people. now, this being said, i agree that in sixth year he might have thrown a tantrum, had she done what she did in castles, but that was sixth year. it was before the war. before he lost half a dozen people. before he had to adult bloody fucking quickly. this being said, i do think castles-Harry is more 'subdued,' i suppose, than canon harry. this is a choice i made early on, which to me is related to the fact that he kind of lost his 'voice' during the war. i mean, it took him six months of people talking shit behind his back to do a press interview to defend himself. i think with ginny, it's a lot of the same. he's a boy who blames himself a lot, and generally doesn't particularly think he deserves the people in his life. to me it's an evolution of his character within the the world of castles. i'm happy to agree to disagree on it, but to me it makes sense within the character evolution and the way the fic's gone, so to speak. now, obviously, he'll grow out of that in due course, but we're not quite there yet.

regarding their relationship, now, i have to say: one headcanon that i did have for this was her not outright telling everyone they’d broken up. i’m sorry, that plan was shit. i just don’t buy for a second that she would willingly have gone ahead with it, and i don’t buy for a second that tom wouldn’t have used her had he known they’d been together, ex girlfriend or not. plus, i think she needed something to hand onto, and that was her relationship with him. her letters. the belief that they would be together again. without it, i don’t think she’d have survived. and i think that summer after the war, they were totally on the same page, for different reasons. both of them kind of saw their relationship as the one thing that kept them afloat, the one good thing they had, partly also because they’d idealised it for so long. she says it as some point, it wasn’t a relationship, it was a lifeline (another sentence i came up with as a response to a comment, lol) and while that is toxic and was meant to crumble at some point, it was necessary for them, both during the war, and in the early days after it. i think her last letter to him is painstakingly correct on that one.

regarding canon, i know i’m bending a couple of things here, which i just wanted to quickly acknowledge: 1) i know jkr has said it’s teddy remus lupin. i just can’t believe, for a moment, that someone who hated himself as much as lupin did, canonically, would name his son after himself. naming his son after his best mate who died to young to become problematic though? i totally see it. so yeah, creative licence, it’s teddy james lupin in this house, lol. 2) when they meet neville in dh, he kind of hints that they’ve only just started to use the room of requirement a couple weeks ago. the text however, only says they’ve only been staying in it full time a couple of weeks ago. i needed them to have somewhere where to meet with the da and stuff, so i bent that a bit. it’s not strictly canon, but it’s also not not canon, if that makes sense.

on seamus blowing things up and talking about eight hundred years of oppression? full disclaimer, while i am french, i have been living in ireland for long enough to become eligible for citizenship in less than six months (yay!). i know some people have said that seamus is a bit of a cliche in the books/films and all (the only irish character keen on blowing things up, haha *eyeroll*), but i actually kind of love it? like, the whole thing about the cranberries and zombie at the start of the fic has been in my head for much longer than i care to admit. i love the idea that there’s this whole muggle war going on at the exact same time that no one ever talks about and actually, i find the idea of wizarding ireland v. muggle ireland and the whole political structure fascinating. like, is wizarding ireland an independent state? what’s the story there? i have a whole seamus fic in my head, partially on this topic, that i might or might not write one day.

lastly, i know this may sound a bit weird but i need to say it: once i’d figured out what and how i was writing it, i bloody loved writing this chapter. first stylistically, i really wanted to mimic the style of how i’d written the magazine article in chapter 5 (i.e. not writing out the whole thing but writing out in text the excerpts that harry focused on) and i love how that turned out. i think it was a good way to balance her words and his, kind of merging them into one, big narrative. second, as a writer, it was so fucking interesting to write someone who knows how to write, which believe it or not i’d never done before. additionally, i loved the challenge of editing this because it was like: i’ve got to edit this, but not too much? i was very careful about modifying and polishing too much of ginny’s speech in the letters because i obviously wanted it to sound like someone who was just writing as the words came to her, without polishing the words, the punctuation, etc. like i usually would. i wanted her to have quirks (she says ‘you know?’ a lot) and i played with her capitalisation and punctuation a bit too. i know these aren’t necessarily noticeable details but it was definitely something that i thought about and that was very fun and interesting to write, as a format.

wow, okay. this was LONG but i think i have everything i wanted to say. if you’ve read all of this (whyyyyy?), thanks so much for sticking around. if you’ve got any questions, anything i didn’t address, do let me know, anon or not, my ask box is open. now, i would love to say i’m going to chill or something, but the truth is that i have to a) actually do a last read through of the fic, lol and b) put it out. this is what i get for writing the a/n before finishing the damn thing, i guess. i’ll rest tomorrow, lol.

lastly, in terms of next chapter, realistically, i’d say eight to ten weeks. i have a full time job now and also, writing this was fucking exhausting and i need to take time out for a bit before coming back to it with a fresh mind. i will be writing other stuff though, i promise. i have a couple of prompts to get to (thanks!!!) and a couple of other ideas so i will probably be posting in the meantime, just not castles.

lots of love,

#castles #extended an #writing #fic #its out #holy shit #byyyyyye #I have not proofread this so we die like men eh

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