#like im pretty far through my treatment so outbursts and violence and all that stuff people like to either romanticize or demonize

[dirt-grub]

i dont like the way the fanbase harps on it and makes it this big hastag edgy thing but i really like that suf straight up was like steven has ptsd... like ive always projected my symptoms onto protagonists like that, because it just makes sense to me. Like, having gone through something dramatic, unbelievable and terrifying that other people would never believe? Being triggered by things that don’t make any sense to people who weren’t there? Like, with so many things from that show the fanbase has twisted it into something unrecognizable and unrelatable at least for me personally but i really deeply admire the original source material for doing that. Also basically this is a long winded way of saying that all the protagonists from sci-fi/fantasy stuff that i kin i also strongly headcanon as having ptsd for the same reason steven has it

#prepare for that on the kinblog lol #i wont ever get triggering or descriptive but paranoia is def a symptom i have that will come out a bit there #ive kinned dipper since i was like 12 and that was a HUGE reason why #i just saw things people didnt and could read between the lines and find terrifying things where others saw nothing at all #i was scared of things that didnt make sense and paranoid of even my closest friends and family #also have a major fear/lingering feelings of being watched like almost all the time #so uh yeah #like im pretty far through my treatment so outbursts and violence and all that stuff people like to either romanticize or demonize #arent all that common for me. people dont realize like its a thing that follows you for life but its not 0 to 60 ALL the time #its always different and changing and yeah i can have an episode like i used to when i was first healing its possible #but its not ALWAYS on edge and afraid and closed off for life #its something i live with every day even when you cant see it #connor talks