#like me even saying that is gonna make her go 'well you never do that either' which i dont think is true but also can you ever like step

[princessmaybank]

hi princess, I hope your break is going well <33 this is like super specific but could you do a jj x Routledge!reader with super blonde frizzy hair nd jj doesn’t know she dyes it brown until he walks in on her with a lions mane getting dye ready

No pressure at all for u to get to this, i love ur work so so much and I hope you’re going okay princess <333 thank you

thank you for the request! wasn't sure if you wanted smut in there but that's how all of my Fics end up so I'm assuming you do! I'm sorry this turned so dark if you wanted it fluffier. I have recently started Haunting Adeline 😂🤭🩷

Hair Dye

Pairings: JJ x Routledge!Reader

Warnings: Surprise Kiss, Fingering, Rough!Dark!JJ, Spanking, Panty Ripping, Hair Pulling, Choking, P in V, Creampie, Caught, etc.

Summary: Read the ask^

Author's Note: Wrote this so fast, I hope you like it, sorry it's so late!

"I just don't see the point, dad and I have brown hair, you got blonde hair, you should feel special!" John B says as I walk down the aisle searching for the color I want. "That's exactly the point JB. I feel left out. It's odd, plus people have asked us way too many times if we're dating, even though we have the same face." JB rolled his eyes in defeat as I found the shade of brown I was searching so hard for. I was so excited that I could barely wait until we got home.

"Hey JJ is coming over soon!" I hear JB yell from the kitchen as he puts away some groceries. "I expect nothing less. Your boyfriend basically lives here!" I laugh as I go into the bathroom and read the instructions. Once I think I finally have it down and the parts mixed together, my brother calls me into the kitchen. "I'm gonna start cooking dinner. Is there any way I am going to talk you out of this? Blonde hair takes a long time to come back." He says and almost on cue JJ stumbles in the front door. "And yet yours keeps coming back." I say throwing my thumb over my shoulder. He chuckled at my stupid joke and ruffled my hair, causing it to frizz up even more than it already had.

"Hey there, hot stuff." JJ said with a wink. I roll my eyes before walking to the bathroom. "He was talking to you!" I shout teasing JB about his best friend. "I definitely wasn't but okay. What's with her?" I hear him ask my brother. I put the gloves on and get a towel ready under my neck. "She's going to dye her hair. I kept trying to talk her out of it. Fuck, I forgot something at the store. I'll be back, try not to kill each other." I heard the screen door slam as John B ran out.

I heard loud footsteps coming from the hallway until they reached me. "You're not gonna try to talk me out of it too are you?" I say setting down the bottle of dye. "Not gonna try shit" I breathe out a sigh of relief. "You're not doing it." He demanded. "Who do you think you are?" I ask with a full attitude. "Y/N. You don't need to dye your hair." I shook my head. "I want to!" I whined. JJ went to grab the bottle of hair dye and so did I. Eventually he tore it from me and held it above his head. I wasn't able to reach it and he laughed because he thought he had won. I looked him in the eyes and took his face in my hands, planting a big kiss on him. when his lips moved back and forth with mine, I knew he'd drop his arm any second. And he did. I took the chance and stole my bottle back running to the guest bedroom and trying to make it to that bathroom. I wasn't aware JJ was right behind me until I was pinned against the bathroom door.

"Why must you be a little brat all the time?" He asked. JJ's eyes are dark now. This wasn't a game anymore. He removed the bottle from my hand, I let him take it because I was so stunned by this sudden change. "You're. Not. Dying. It." He said with a low menacing voice. "Jay-" I tried to plead, I don't know why, but he was scaring me. He was also kind of arousing me. I never had these feelings for my brother's best friend, maybe it was just how dark he felt in this moment.

He stared into my eyes before placing his lips to mine once again. It felt different this time, I felt a zing, coursing through my veins. His fingertips were now bruising my hips as he lightly humped me through our clothes. This felt unreal. I peak my eyes open for a moment. Yep. it was still JJ. He was still grabbing me with an intense force and grinding his rock hard cock into me.

My eyes shut again and I just went with it. His right hand moved to unbutton my shorts. When he found his way in, he didn't tease, he only plummeted two fingers into my soaked core. "He won't be gone long, if there's something you want from me..tell me now." He demanded again. My eyes stared into his begging to be fucked but I knew it wouldn't be that easy. "F-fuck me.." I whispered through my breath, unable to think as his fingers moved back and forth. "Speak up." His harsh tone scared me slightly but I said my phrase again, louder so he could hear.

His fingers escaped my opening, causing a whine to spill from my lips. He rolled his eyes before pulling my shorts down. I kicked them to the side before I was roughly turned around and slammed up against the door. A gasp flew out of me unexpectedly followed by another when I felt him slap my ass. I let out loud moans as he continued, taking turns with my cheeks. When they were blood red, he squeezed them in his hands. I hissed from the sensitivity he caused.

He toyed with my panties for a few seconds before he spoke. "You don't need these." He chuckled lightly before I heard a ripping sound. Shock was written all over my face as he tore the rest of the thin fabric off of my body. His fingers found my slick folds and teased them for a moment. I was about to chime in before hearing the sound of a zipper and shorts dropping to the ground. I didn't have enough time to process the noise before I felt his cock slide inside me. He let out a dark groan and quickened his pace, not letting me adjust to his size. He was going so fast and so hard. I was a moaning mess. My head started to fall but he didn't let it get too far. His hand pulled me back by my hair while his other wrapped around my throat. His fingertips squeezed tighter, not giving me much room to work air in or out. "You like that? Like my hand wrapped around your throat while you take my cock?" He asked and all I could do was give a small nod before he pulled my hair again, so now my ear was against his lips. "What would John B say if he walked in on us right now? Think he'd be pissed to see his sister with my cock jammed in her tight pussy?" He teased.

Those words were enough to cause an eruption in me. My orgasm hit me like a freight train and slid down his cock and onto his thighs. His hand left my throat and fell to my hips as I pulled in as much air as possible. He fucked me hard a few more times before his cum leaked inside of me.

The sound of the screen door opening and closing apparently wasn't enough to get JJ's dick out of me. My throat was tired, I couldn't mutter a word and JJ knew that. He rode out his high which made my eyes roll back. It was enough for me to squeeze my thighs together and cum again.

"JJ when I said anything, this is not what I meant!" JB shouted. We never even heard him walk in, but we heard the bedroom door slam. We cooled down and I went into the bathroom to inspect my neck. There were bruises where JJ had a hold of me. "What did he mean by that?" I asked. JJ was a lot brighter now. "Oh he messaged me before you two got home and told me to make you not dye your hair. He said to do anything I have to." He chuckled. "Wasn't planning this.." He said pointing to my neck. "But I'm glad it happened." He shrugged and kissed my forehead. A smile spread onto my face before I laid my head on his chest. He held me in his arms and I promised to never dye my hair.

"Good, I like pullin' on this blonde lion's mane." He giggled before I swatted at his chest.

#outer banks #jj maybank #rudy pankow smut #rudy pankow x reader #obx fic #obx x reader #outer banks smut #jj maybank smut #jj maybank imagine #smut prompts

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Glynda: “You’re back. And the beast?”

Jaune: “Monster is slain. Bangarang.” *snaps his fingers so that he ends up pointing distantly at the ground*

Glynda: “You look tired. You should get some rest.”

Jaune: “Can’t. I have to help team CMAD with their serial killer mission."

Glynda: “Why?”

Jaune: “Why do I have to help them or what help do I have to give?”

Glynda: “Well, both at once I suppose.”

Jaune: “The killer came up into my network about a week ago. It’s sort of my responsibility to keep an eye out for people like this.”

Glynda: “Your network?”

Jaune: “My criminal contacts in the city. I have the name and semblance of the killer.”

Glynda: “That’s most useful.”

Jaune: “That’s what I strive for. I wake up everyday and say ‘oh, if only I could be most useful today.’”

Glynda: *narrows her eyes then offers a dismissive half shrug*"Ozpin often wished to be able to tap into those elements for this very reason but couldn’t figure out how to get started. I mean, it’s nice to say you want to build trust and contacts like that and quite another to go out and succeed at it.”

Jaune: “They want you to kill people for them sometimes. And sometimes you have to kill some people just to put the fear in ‘em. Or torture people. Whatever.”

Glynda: “Should you be telling me this?”

Jaune: “I mean, what are you gonna do about it? What is anybody gonna do about it? Besides, I thought it was ‘most useful.’”

Glynda: “Maybe not what you have to give up to make it happen. That’s perhaps why Ozpin never succeeded.”

Jaune: “You have to have a hard stomach. And at any rate I need to be able to see my sisters coming or, god forbid I even say this, my Mother? Could you imagine her rolling up on us?”

Glynda: “I don’t really want to. Would she?” 

Jaune: “She mostly acts through intermediaries when she can. I can… feel her? Her location? All the time. So I’d know if she was moving around at all. Instead she just hangs out on one of the kingdomless continents. Ayan. So she stays far away from any kingdom and acts from the shadows.”

Glynda: “I don’t know how concerning that is. How concerned should I be?”

Jaune: “Somewhere between one and ten. Depending on how much thought you want to give it. Just don’t think about it very much. That’s what I do. And I’m… mostly fine?”

Glynda: *shakes her head at him. Gentle but firm denial* 

Jaune: “Well, I’m as ‘okay’ as could be expected?”

Glynda: “I don’t think so."

Jaune: “Exactly how ‘okay’ am I supposed to be?” 

Glynda: “Well ideally with a one being the worst and a ten being the best you’d be at a ten, Jaune."

Jaune: “I’m like a five. A hard five. That passes muster.”

Glynda: “A hard five which way?” 

Jaune: “Yeah, fair cop. Good point.”

Glynda: “I wasn’t even making a point."

Jaune: “Well you made it anyway."

Glynda: "Go to bed, Jaune. Your serial killer can wait. What? Are you excited to add to your little collection?”

Jaune: “Am I more or less messed up if I say ‘yes?’” 

Glynda: “You’re just a mixed up kid.”

Jaune: “I mean… yeah. I knew that. But am I more or less fucked if I say I want to add her sniper rifle to my collection?”

Glynda: “You know her weapon?”

Jaune: “Answer the question.”

Glynda: “I… I would say that you’re more mixed up than less. Not everyone has a collection of weapons from serial killers they’ve stopped. Not everyone thinks about adding to it. You are more mixed up than not. You’ve got to really be at least a four out of ten. Admit that to me.”

Jaune: “It’s really probably at most a three.”

Glynda: “Go to bed.”

Jaune: “I’ll go to bed. After I send team CMAD my dossier so they're not going in blind. I think she’s too dangerous for them or hee police to take on. If they find her, sure, good enough. But I really don’t think they should fight her.”

Glynda: “You can’t coddle them.”

Jaune: “I’m tryin’ not to but there’s a serial killer on the loose and they have some real power.”

Glynda: “What about you?”  

Jaune: “What about me?”

Glynda: "You’re a serial killer serial killer.” 

Jaune: “What? I’m not a… serial killer.”

Glynda: “Don’t emphasize ‘serial.’ It doesn’t do anyone any favors.”

Jaune: “Mass murderer? Sure. Spree killer? Probably. But I don’t do it for psychological gratification.”

Glynda: “Don’t emphasis ‘psychological!’ You need to find a sweet girl to look after you. Help put you back together. If you even like girls that is. I didn’t mean to imply anything.”

Jaune: “I like girls. I’ve got team RWBY.”

Glynda: “They’re not here. What’s wrong with Miss Gainsborough?”

Jaune: “You mean besides the fact she’s my student? Off limits, remember? Besides, she’s seen a little into how fucked I am and probably shouldn’t want any of that mess.”

Glynda: “What if she does anyway?” 

Jaune: “I think I would know by now? I'd like to believe I would. But I don't really understand girls. Just throw me at a monster or serial killer or something and let me worry about that. Girls are complicated and hard and complicated."

Glynda: "Not really."

Jaune: "Girls like games and hints and teasing around."

Glynda: "Do you think I'd play games?"

Jaune: "I think you're probably an exception and not the rule. You and Weiss both."

Glynda: "Miss Schnee?"

Jaune: "Yeah. I mean, I think so. She doesn't like games or hints or playing around with her feelings either. I think that's why she barely tolerated me when we went to school here."

Glynda: "You were attracted to her? In your time as a student?"

Jaune: "Still am. That hasn't really changed. She was my first real crush. I had fake memories of crushes before that but I really woke up for the first time at Beacon after I was set loose. And then I met Weiss. Beautiful. Smart. Way out of my league. We're not even playing the same ball game." I ran a hand through my hair and felt the grime there. 

Glynda: "Good for you." 

Jaune: "Why?"

Glynda: "I think that's healthy. I'd be a shade more concerned if you really weren't attracted to anybody and you had nothing to strive for. Not that there's anything wrong with being asexual. But it's important to have personal goals for yourself and not just professional ones."

Jaune: "I'd love to impress her. Still. I'm just not really sure how. You know? In her time as the heiress or whatever she probably had all sorts of guys appeal to her so she's pretty much seen it all. I have no moves to make that she hasn't seen somebody else do better than I can. And I doubt my little collection of mass murderer trophies would make her stop and think in a good way."

Glynda: "Have you tried not appealing to her at all. Maybe you should just be honest with yourself and her and let your personality impress her."

Jaune: "I'm a schizoaffective loser."

Glynda: "You're not a loser just because you're schizoaffective."

Jaune: "I know that. I’m not stupid. I have totally separate reasons for why I'm a loser. I'm not funny and my personality isn't particularly pleasant to be around."

Glynda: "You have charm. You can be funny. Not exactly cracking jokes or something similar but you have a certain dry humor. Use that to impress her. Plus you've become surprisingly competent."

Jaune: "Well, thanks. I'll just use all those assets when I see her again and blow her away. Anyways. I'm safe. I'm back. My mission was a success and I thought you'd like to know that." I pulled my scroll from my side pocket and started tapping away and putting together what information I had on Cerise Genfield for CMAD. "Let's see if we can't wrangle ourselves up a serial killer. Yee-haw. I always did love outlaw justice. It's super fake. And it's basically all the murder with none of the guilt ."

Glynda: "Do you really think that?"

Jaune: "A little."

Glynda: "Go to sleep. Let the police and team CMAD track her down."

Jaune: "I hear you. I'm off to bed." 

#glynda goodwitch #rwby #rwby incorrect quotes #jaune arc #weiss schnee #whiteknight #white knight #motion sickness

[imahinatjon]

Maintenance

Chuuya x Reader

Sensitive topics heavily implied!!!

As a member of the port Mafia, you were no stranger to loosing friends, comrades, though it was usually a result of the job.

In your personal life though... yeah, it was pretty much the same situation, with a few tweaked details.

You've always had a hard time making friends, and keeping them. You always assume its your fault.

It could be a number of other things. Poor choice in friends, you not doing enough to keep the friendship going, them not doing enough to keep the friendship going, drifting apart, personalities that just don't mesh, among other things of the sort.

Even when you find all these reasons, you still arrive to the same conclusion. It's all your fault.

But, you found a solution, a way to stop your friends from leaving you.

Over the years, you found that acts of service help. Doing things for these people, agreeing with these people, letting them dump their emotional baggage on you, buying things for them (even when you weren't in a good enough financial situation for it)

Ultimately, you found, the only way you could keep your friends around was to do whatever they wanted you to.

If only you hadn't been so wrong.

When Chuuya first joined the Mafia, he didn't know you, and you didn't know him. You were just some other underling, you worked for so and so doing such and such, he'd only occasionally pass you in the hallway.

Still, he had the biggest crush on you. You were just so beautiful, to pretty, so sweet. You seemed out of place in the Mafia headquarters.

The more he thought about you, the more you started appearing. Like that strange phenomenon when you first notice someone, and then suddenly you see them everywhere.

He wasn't complaining.

He saw how you were with some of your comrades, woman and men, you were always running around, doing things for them, following them wherever they wanted you to go. He didn't think much of it until he got brave enough to approach you and the group of 'friends' you had made a few years later.

"Ah, damn, I don't have enough for lunch! And I was really craving a pizza today too!" One of the woman whined, that's when you perked up, meekly raising your hand, as though you needed permission to speak, their attention went to you.

"I-i could always go and get you something if you like? I have enough on me"

That was nice of you.

"Really?! That would be great! Seriously, your such a life saver YN" she accepted your offer and praised you. And you ate it up with a bright smile and ran off to god knows where.

Once you were out of earshot, he heard the woman snicker

"See, if you want her to do anything, just make her feel bad for you! Pretend your injured, or sick, or that you have no money! Hell, she'll do anything if you so much as say you've had a bad day"

Chuuya froze. What? It was like some teen drama show - the overly kind, energetic friendly girl being taken advantage of by the meaner more callous popular one (Not that she was popular, Chuuya didn't even know her name, nor did he want to)

Well, if that's what it was gonna be like- he'd just become your Knight in shining armor!

If only it was that easy.

You'd come back rather quickly, almost like you'd ran, and handed the food over, the group thanking you, patting your head like dog before they up and left you standing there. You didn't have anything. Left on your own to go hungry for the day because you spent what you had on someone else.

So chuuya introduced himself. And he took you out to lunch.

It was the start of what should have been a beautiful friendship. But you were incredibly dense, and you treated chuuya the same way you treated everyone else, albeit with more effort because he never asked for anything.

And that made you nervous. You didn't know what you could do for him. So you did everything, to the point that everyone knew, and you eventually got assigned to become his 'secretary' of sorts. His personal lackey. Why bother giving anyone else the position when you were there doing it all anyway?

And Chuuya HATED this arrangement. But he couldn't say anything, not when you looked so happy to be working with him.

It takes a few more years before he's ready to tell you that he has feelings for you. He doesn't know what's been stopping him. Perhaps he was worried you didn't feel the same. He wouldn't put it past you to agree to date someone just because they asked, because you felt like you had to.

But then - then you got a boyfriend. Some guy he didn't know, and didn't really want to know.

You'd talk Chuuya's ear off about this man all day long, not singing his praise, but... complaining? It was refreshing, to see you not speaking so highly of someone, but it was also concerning as to the state of your relationship.

Your boyfriend disregarded your feelings, ignored what you said. But you'd tell Chuuya it was okay, because sometimes he just 'forgot'. He never spent much money on you either, which was fine, you didn't expect it. But chuuya distinctly remembers one day in the office watching you pace back and forth because you didn't have enough money for your boyfriends birthday gift - he'd been asking for it for months now, and you couldn't afford it.

Of course chuuya gave you the money for it. And of course you paid him back when he asked you not too.

After a few months Chuuya told you that you had to break up with him, for your own good. But you refused.

"You have no right to tell me that"

He didn't see you much after that. It broke his heart.

But not as much as it did weeks later when you came crying to him in his office. It was about your boyfriend - ex boyfriend now.

Chuuya once spoke about the future with you, where you saw yourself- married? Kids? You said you never wanted kids.

But now you come to him, a small white stick in your hand and tears running down your face. He sits you down and asked what happend.

"H-he didn't want to use... he didn't want to use protection. I asked him too, but he said it felt better without it. He said he'd leave me. So I - I let him..." Chuuya understood what you were saying, and it made his blood boil, he was ready to comitt murder in your name. But then you said something else that worried him.

"Then I..." You couldn't finish the sentence as you handed him the stick you came in with. Chuuya wasn't stupid. He knew what this was. It was the last thing you wanted.

"What are you going to do?" He finally asked.

You didn't answer him, instead leaning and resting your head on his shoulder.

You were tired. So he would let you sleep.

You left after a few hours, and came back a week later. A happy go lucky smile on your face as you ran around doing all the tasks you needed to do plus a few extras on the side. You weren't all there of course, smile faltering ever so slightly when you thought no one was looking. When no one would notice.

But Chuuya noticed. Of course he did. He was always looking. He always has been.

He let's you settle back into life, before he even considers thinking about you romantically again. He's cautious, he doesn't want to hurt you.

But eventually it gets too much. Your acts of service, you keep buying him things. It's too much! He should be the one doing that for you. And he tells you as much.

"But why? That's not... you job?" You asked him.

"It's not yours either"

You think you understand, and you panic - have you been doing too much all this time? You thought that was how friendships were supposed to work.

"You don't... you don't need to keep doing things for me. I want to be the one doing things for you!" He exclaimed, infront of many onlookers. "I want to be the one spoiling you, buying you presents, taking you out to eat, be someone you can lean on, talk to, tell all your problems" he continued further.

"I want to hold your hand. I want to see your face every day, I want to be close to you, and I want you to stop thinking you have to do things for me because you don't have to do anything other than be yourself"

"I didn't fall in love with what you could do for me, I didn't fall in love with the material items you brought me, I just fell in love with you, everything else be damned"

"You...fell in love with me?"

"Of course I did. How could I not"

"Well... i could think of one or two reasons" you tried to joke

"Just shut up. You have no idea how much it hurt, how much I hated myself for not being able to stop others from using you, how much it felt like I was also using you. And I don't want to use you, I just want to be with you... that's all"

"I..." You couldn't hide the shy grin coming to your face. It was out of character for Chuuya, especially infront of so many people to say such things, it was also cheesy. But... it meant to world to you. Chuuya loved you. And a part of you, the part of you you had been trying for so long to push down loved him too.

"You said you love me..." You whispered "you really said you love me!" You said a little louder

"I mean... well... yea, I guess I did"

You couldn't stop yourself from rushing forward to hug him, hiding your face in his shoulder

"You have... no idea how happy that makes me"

"I'd like to tell you how much i love you every day... if you'll let me?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ehhhh, the endings not really doing it for me I'm afraid. I wanted so badly to write a bad ending, but that wouldn't have been very comforting.

Not that Chuuya did a whole lot of comforting until the end... sorta.

Masterlist :3

#bsd chuuya #imagine #fanfic #bungou stray dogs #x reader #anime #chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara #chuuya nakahara x reader

[babygirl-diaz]

Heart to Heart to Heart

This fic is dedicated to the anon who sent me an ask saying "Don't write poly, it's a sin." I wish you a pleasant day and enjoy your fic!

***

It was their one-month anniversary and Eddie wasn't sure Buck and Tommy even remembered it. Or if they even wanted to celebrate it. He was too embarrassed to ask. This was his first relationship with two other people and he was so into them. They lit up his entire world and made him feel something no other relationship ever did.

"What's wrong?"

Eddie looked up to see Hen giving him a concerned look.

"Nothing," Eddie shook his head.

"Sure looks like something," Hen replied and sat down next to him on the sofa. "Is everything okay with Buck and Tommy?"

"Yeah, everything is fine. I just- just-" Eddie sighed before saying, "-When I was with Shannon, we kinda celebrated every little milestone we had. From our first month together to our first kiss, etc. And I loved that. I loved having a silly little anniversary for everything. And the smile it brought to Shanon's face always made my day better."

Hen nodded along but it was clear from her expression that she didn't quite get where Eddie was going with this.

"-It's my one-month anniversary with Buck and Tommy," he explained.

"And you wanna celebrate it?" Hen asked and a small smile twitched on her lips.

"I do," Eddie replied. "I really do."

"Then go for it. What's the problem?" Hen continued to ask.

"You have to understand, I've never been in a relationship with a man before, let alone two men. So I'm just wondering if they're gonna wanna celebrate it or they'll find the whole thing ridiculous," Eddie replied and looked down at his hands.

"Well, you'll never know if you don't ask," Hen told him.

"But what if they laugh at me?" Eddie asked and couldn't help but pout a little.

"Then do you really wanna be with them?" Hen asked.

Eddie was taken aback by that question, but he knew Hen was right.

That evening, Eddie stopped by a flower shop and bought two bouquets, one for Buck and another for Tommy. They were simple bouquets of red roses because he was cheesy like that.

They were going to meet at Tommy's that night and when Eddie reached his house, he stayed in the truck a little longer than necessary, just looking at the flowers on the passenger seat. He wondered if he should take them. In the end, he just said fuck it and took the bouquets with him. He knocked on Tommy's door and waited patiently for him to answer.

"Hey, baby," Tommy greeted him cheerily after opening the door.

"Hey," Eddie replied awkwardly.

"Hey, Eds!" Buck appeared behind Tommy. "What's wrong?" He asked with concern in his voice.

"Nothing," Eddie tried to assure him. "Um... I got these for you two!" He quickly told them, handing them the bouquets.

Both of their faces lit up like Christmas trees as they took the flowers from him.

"For our first month anniversary?" Tommy asked.

That took Eddie aback. "You remembered?"

"Of course we did! Doh!" Buck chuckled and stepped aside to let Eddie in.

Once Eddie was inside, both Buck and Tommy planted a kiss on each of his cheeks.

Eddie blushed profusely at that.

"Come on, gotta show you something." Buck took Eddie's hand and led him to the living room.

Eddie turned around to look at Tommy for answers but he just shrugged.

"Ta-da!"

Eddie's eyes widened when he saw the scene before him. There was a table set up for the three of them with all sorts of food and a candle in the middle of the table. There were also two sets of the same red rose bouquet sitting on the table. "Wh-" He started to say in disbelief.

"Happy anniversary, baby!" Tommy said in his ear after wrapping his arms around Eddie's middle.

"I can't believe you guys did this!" Eddie said.

Buck wrapped his arm around Eddie from the front, sandwiching him between himself and Tommy. He kissed Eddie's forehead, making him smile. "You love anniversaries. So could we not celebrate our very first one?"

"How did you know I love anniversaries?" Eddie looked at him confused.

"You told me, silly. Don't you remember?" Buck asked.

"I did?"

"Yeah, you were once telling me about Shannon and how you two enjoyed celebrating every little anniversary together," Buck replied.

"So we figured we should continue the tradition," Tommy added, kissing behind Eddie's ear.

"You two-" Eddie started to say but he really teared up this time. "I can't believe-"

"Well, you better believe, baby," Buck told him and kissed his forehead. "And the best part is that we all ended up bringing each other red roses. We're such saps."

"That we are," Tommy agreed. "There's another first time we haven't had yet. At least not with you," he said pulling away from Eddie.

Buck did too and wrapped his arm around Tommy's waist instead, pulling him close.

"I- I'm still not ready," Eddie told them awkwardly and shifted from one foot to another.

"That's not what we meant, baby," Buck assured him.

Eddie looked at them confused and Tommy chuckled before saying, "Our first kiss. We haven't had that yet."

"But we've kissed before," Eddie told them, still feeling confused.

"Yeah, we kissed at Maddie's wedding when you pulled both of us close and planted a sloppy kiss on our lips. But I am talking about our first proper kiss, where you let us explore that pretty mouth of yours," Buck suggested.

Eddie looked between the two of them and blushed again.

"We of course don't have to if you're not ready," Tommy quickly assured him.

"Yeah, of course not," Buck added.

"No, no, I am ready. I want it. I just- I didn't realize that we haven't kissed since the wedding," Eddie replied.

Buck and Tommy looked at each other before taking each of Eddie's hands and leading him to the couch. They all sat down and Buck pulled Eddie into his lap.

"Do you wanna go first?" Buck asked Tommy.

"No, be my guest," Tommy replied and kissed Buck once.

Eddie felt his heart thrum in his chest as he watched them kiss.

Buck then pulled away and tilted Eddie's chin up, bringing him forward, and kissing him. It was a slow kiss. Very different from the one he shared with Buck and Tommy a month ago. He opened his mouth when Buck's tongue traced his lips and let him in. Buck was respectful and didn't push Eddie. He rested his hands on Eddie's waist and left them there. He also let Eddie set the pace of the kiss. Eddie felt like his whole body was on fire. He grasped onto Buck's shirt and pulled him closer so that he could feel his body and his heart pressed against him. They soon parted for air and looked at each other. "You good?" Buck asked.

"Better than good," Eddie replied and wondered if his lips were swollen just like Buck's.

"Holy shit, that was hot," Tommy chimed in. "I don't know if I'm ready to follow that."

"Tommy just shut up and kiss me," Eddie told him, feeling a bit more confident, and slipped into his lap instead, straddling him.

"God, you're so beautiful," Tommy pointed out and stroked his cheek with his thumb and pointer finger.

Eddie leaned in and kissed him instead. Tommy's arms wound around Eddie's waist and he pulled him closer as he kissed him. Like Buck, he took it slow as well. His lips were rougher than Buck's and waited for Eddie to let him in out of his own will. But when Eddie let him in, it almost felt like he was ready to consume him. His tongue wet and heavy in Eddie's mouth, explored every inch of it and he drew out moans from him, which he then swallowed back. They kept kissing for what seemed like hours before coming up for air.

Eddie felt dazed after kissing him. "You two are going to be the death of me," he told them when he found his voice again.

#eddie diaz #evan buckley #tommy kinard #buddie #bucktommy #teddie #bucktommyeddie #911 abc #911 fanfic #fanfiction #drabble

[apollosfavkiddo]

⛧° you promised you’d come back

⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧

content: jason grace x pluto!fem!reader blurb

warnings: angst, not a happy ending, interrupted friends to lovers, death of character, really short.

a/n: i know, i know, i have to post the leo fic first. whatever?? i wrote this late night in the hospital in my phone and i cried, so you’re gonna read it and cry too. this one doesn’t even have wc or song cause i literally left it just like i wrote. shits really short. good luck 🫡

⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧

You didn’t have any news on how the damn quest was going.

No Iris message. No letter. Absolutely no indication that your best friend was still alive. lt was a mix of emotions together, but especially fear.

Fear that maybe he wasn’t alive anymore. Maybe he had finally succumbed to one of those damned quests that your parents put you through, because somehow, they can’t do it on their owns.

But you had to cling to the small light of hope that was alive and that he was okay. After all, he promised you he’d come back.

“Of course i’ll come back, y/n/n. I always do.”

And maybe when you do came back, you thought, i’m finally be able to tell you how much i love you.

But all that hope was completely and totally crushed down the moment that Nico came to your apartment, along with Lester, Meg and Piper.

All of them had a dark and intense gaze, but especially Nico.

You obviously knew about the growing friendship that Jason had with the younger boy. Gods, Jason even talked about him like an older brother talks about his baby sibling.

And that’s when you knew. That’s when it hit you, that’s you’d never see Jason again.

“Y/n… can i come in?” Nico asked, his voice cracked. He instantly cleared his throat and stand up straight, swallowing a lump. “I mean- we. Can we come in?”

You just nodded, the tears already welling up in your eyes.

“Hm… Im really sorry to say this, Y/n, but… Jason didn’t make it. Caligula, he-“ Apollo - Jason’s half brother, cause nothing could be better - said, but you interrupted him with a raise of your hand.

“It’s okay. You didn’t have to come all the way here to talk to me about this. You have a quest to continue, i get it. You can go now.” You said, your voice trying to sound firm and certain.

“Y/n, are you-“ Piper said, reaching out a hand to you.

“Yes.” You said, taking a step back away from her. You and Piper never had the best relationship, and you just thought that she was the last person you’d want around in a moment like this - the girl who first killed Jason. “I’m fine. Really.”

You tried to sound reassuring, but Nico quickly caught in your facade. He cleared his throat again and looked back at the trio behind him. “It’s fine.” He said, and they finally backed off.

Meg was the only one who didn’t. She achtualmy took a step forward and pulled you in to a hug. She was a few inches shorter than you, so it was hard for her, but the hug was very appreciated. You quickly reciprocated, and she finally pulled away. She had puffy eyes and a pout on her lips.

“I’m sorry about him. I know you were close.” She said in a whisper, only to both of you hear, and you smiled. She was sweet. You nodded and whispered back a small ‘thank you’. And then, they finally left.

When you closed the door, you immediately broke into sobs. Your brother was quick to cradle you into his arms, and you just sobbed.

Not that far after, you felt his body also shaking. You didn’t think you ever saw Nico cry, but this was understandable, at least. He was his best friend. He was the best friend to both of you.

“W-why, Nico? It’s- it’s not fair! He’s- he was too young, he-“ You groaned as you sobbed into Nico’s old jacked, damping it completely. Bit you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, not when that happened.

He nodded, caressing your back.

He was gone. Jason was gone. Your Jason. Your best friend. The man you were in love with. The person that you grew to admire, looking up to how kind, generous and intelligent he was.

Your favorite person. Your soulmate.

In the end, all that’s left is a broken promise, a crossed heart and a shattered soul.

#all my love 🍀 #postcards from leah #jason grace #jason grace angst #heroes of olympus #pjo hoo toa #jason grace x reader #jason grace x y/n #jason grace x you #heroes of olympus x reader #pjo

[justallihere]

i'm going insane bc i was away for the weekend and left my phone alone (god bless) and came back to a whole chapter PLUS love declaration PLUS forehead kiss ?? omg.....

Mira is not letting Xaden rest like ever, I do wonder what Violet told her while Xaden was prepping her bath tho.

“Not if it bothers you, they can’t,” said Xaden. “I’ll make sure they keep it away from you.” 

oh he wants violet to be comfortable so baaaad he's the embodiment of "is the sun bothering you queen" and im so here for it.

i'm totally fine and sane over xaden washing violet's hair im not kicking my feet or anything and im definetely not crying over how soft they are and how much trust must violet have on him bc she's letting him touch her hair after it being threatned to be cut.

forehead touches are my faaaav so u can imagine how well fed i am after this chapter and for that i say thank you alli *dramatically bows*

Xaden not wanting her to feel like she wasnt love so he just declares himself to her had me weak, like it could've been this grand gesture but nothing between them has ever been planned or expected so he just winged it and it was perfectly what she needed. talk about soulmates !!

when u told us the declaration was gonna hurt i didnt have this imagined in my mind but im so glad it happened this way and not the way i thought it was gonna happen. it was so bittersweet !!

ALSO she def knows she loves him shes just not ready to admit it bc in no way in hell would she ask him to say after he declared himself if she didnt know she also felt something

also the way they first slept i know xaden neck was complaining

also violet reminded me of a cat who always try to get closer in their sleep. she just wants to cuddle !! and shes so real for that

Rhiannon is truly a bestie!! not her terrorrizing the love interest we love a ride or die bestie, even if sometimes she's unresonable

“You whisked her away before anyone could check on her.” 

bestie there was not one single part of her that wasnt broken what was the man supposed to do *cries* but i do understand her stress

SLOANE MAIRI !!! not her calling the king of tyrrendor her brother i love that for her !! she's a princess so true. also i looove xaden and liam's talk it wasnt too cheesy bc tbh they dont operate like that but it was so genuine !!

can the guards chill !!

Garrick is just like me!! i too love gossip and will put my hands on it as soon as i can. but garrick its been like 12 hours wait a little longer or violet herself will call u out again. but also not garrick begging xaden no rule to country and he's just like "no <3" love that for him his wife just got back running a country is very far from his mind.

“Is that what you told her to do?” Rhiannon raised an eyebrow. “Get over it?” “No, but you’re not her, are you?”

He's so ??!!

the development of violet a few chapters ago being like "he didnt hold me while we slept bc there had been no excuses for it in Aretia" to now being like "im gonna curl into your arms so hard you'll never escape" and honestly good for them !!

anywayyyy i LOVED this chapter

lol a lot happened this weekend, welcome back!!!

Xaden’s literal one and only concern is Violet and her comfort, fuck everything else. I’m totally not fine and sane about the hair washing so I guess we balance each other out 🫶🏻

They are very much soulmates!! Xaden didn’t plan to fall in love with her, of course he didn’t plan some grand declaration of it either, we’re just going with what feels right. Violet is a grumpy little kitten yes you’re right

Rhiannon is stressed as hell, like give her best friend back RIORSON where is she

Garrick needs both gossip and for Xaden to do his job and he’s getting neither of those things! Too bad so sad!

Thank you!!!! 🩷

#storm in the quiet

[kpop---scenarios]

Whiplash (2)

Pairing: Felix x Reader x Hyunjin

Genre: Street Racing, Gang, Friends to Lovers

Word Count: 4k

Taglist: @sheala--marie @kayleefriedchicken @chartrucewhore @cookiesnmilfx

Part One |

“I'm never drinking again.” You groan, rubbing your head, squeezing your eyes shut as you try to sooth your throbbing head. The only thing you remembered about last night was dancing with that guy and then everything goes blank. You take a deep breath in and out before your eyes shoot open. You sniff harder, smelling something delicious, wondering who was in your apartment. And then it hit you, you weren't even home. You looked around, recognizing Hyunjin's room immediately. You crawl out of his bed, your feet shuffling out the door and down the hallway, towards the delicious smell. As you get closer you can hear Felix and Hyunjin talking.

“Food always gets her up. Just wait.” Felix laughed. He knew you so well.

“This smells so good.” You groan, sitting down at the island as you watch the two make pancakes, bacon and eggs.

“I told you.” Felix says, glancing at Hyunjin.

“Good morning.” Hyunjin says, smiling at you as he slides a plate in front of you.

“Morning.” You smile, picking up your fork, ready to dig in. But you couldn't. You looked up at the two men, who were staring at you smirking.

“Do I have something on my face?” you ask, wiping your face off. Neither of them reply, they just keep cooking, glancing at you and smirking.

You take a few bites of your food, trying to ignore those two but flashes of last night keep playing in your head.

“Did I.. “ you pause. “Did I do something last night?” You ask.

Hyunjin and Felix look at each other and then back at you. “Okay, what!?” You yell.

“Maybe I need to get off too.. cause of you two!” Felix says, his voice deep, his eyes on you.

“The things I wanna do to the two of you are not platonic.” Hyunjin says.

Your fork drops as you gasp. Your hands cover your mouth as you stare at them both, your eyes wide. The memories come flooding back to you like a tidal wave and you want to actually fucking die.

“That.. I, um. Wow. Okay so I was drunk. Like really drunk. My sincerest apologies. I'm gonna go.” You mumble. You slip out of the chair quicker than you realized, slipping on your shoes and grabbing your purse and heading out the door. You could not believe you had said all that. you were gonna be embarrassed for the rest of your life. Once you had walked a couple blocks you called a cab so you could properly grieve and call Seulgi so she could talk you off the ledge.

“You said what!?” She gasps.

“Yeah.. drunk me has no sense of boundaries apparently.” You sigh.

“So what are you gonna do?” She asks.

“I'm going to handle it like a mature adult.” You declare. “And pretend it never happened.” You can hear Selgui sigh on the other end of the phone.

Once you're home, you collapse in your bed, closing your eyes while your brain replays the things you said to Hyunjin and Felix the night before. Drunk you really liked to speak your sober thoughts apparently. As embarrassed as you were, you were feeling more anxious than anything. Based on their reactions this morning you knew your friendship wasn't ruined with them, but you couldn't help but feel guilty for saying those things. What if you had made them uncomfortable? What if they started distancing themselves from you? You were a ball of stress and you weren't sure how, or if you could make things better.

You spent the rest of the day in bed, ignoring any phone call and text that made your phone ring. You just wanted to wallow in your self pity for a little bit longer before facing anyone. Part of you knew it wasn't a very big deal, but the other part was mad because you had done so well to keep yourself in a platonic place with them. Finally a few hours later, and after you couldn't stand listening to the beeps and ringing of your phone anymore, you looked at it. All the messages from Felix and Hyunjin, not to mention the phone calls from them as well as from Chan, Changbin and Han begging you to come over for homemade pizza night. you decided to text Han back, letting him know that you'll be right there. You didn't wait for a reply, not that you needed to, but you got dressed and headed over to face the music.

Walking into the house, it's unusually quiet. Where were those rowdy boys? All you could hear was the low humming that was coming from the kitchen. You followed the sound, finding Felix in the kitchen, rolling out dough.

“Hey.” You smile, sitting at the island that you left in a rush only a few hours before.

“Hey you.” He grins, looking up for a second before focusing back on his dough. “The others had to run out for a bit, but we'll let the dough rise and then make the pizzas.” He tells you. You nod your head, feeling too nervous to say anything.

“Can I get you a cocktail?” He asks.

“Oh god, please.” You smile. You knew you shouldn't, but what more could you say to him? Felix quickly whips you up something delicious and you drink it far too quickly.

“Good thing I made extra.” He chuckles, filling your cup again. This time you sip on it as he works on more dough. “What's up? Why do you seem all weird?” He asks.

“What?” You question. You were acting weird, you were quiet and distant.

“Is it because of last night?” He asks, not looking up at you.

“Yeah.” You sigh. “I don't want things to be weird with the three of us.”

“Why would things be weird?” He asks, now looking at you.

“Because of what.. I, you know, said.” You mutter. Felix laughs.

“Maybe I want you to use me non platonically.” He smirks, looking up at you.

Your stomach drops. You stare at him, your mouth hanging open. “I'm.. what?” You ask. But before Felix can reply, you both hear the front door open. You turn your head to look at the entryway, and in walks Hyunjin with a smile plastered on his face.

“There's my girl.” He says, grabbing your chin. “What's going on?” He asks, looking between your shocked face and Felix.

“I think I'm dreaming.” You say, turning back to look at Felix who continues to smirk at you. You pinch your cheek, just to see, but you're not. This is real life.

“Pizza!” You can hear Changbin yell, as the rest of the boys come into the kitchen. They all hug you before standing around the island, Felix giving everyone their dough, and placing all the topping options, cheese and sauce in the middle. The rest of the night you could barely focus, Felix's words replaying in your head.

“Maybe I want you to use me non platonically.”

Was he interested in you? Was he joking? You wanted to ask him, but you didn't want to do it in front of everyone, so you left it. Later that night, as you were trying to sleep in your bed, you fell asleep to the thought of using him non platonically.

Over the next few days, you didn't see much of anyone. They said they had a lot of things going on, and you didn't question it. Sometimes they were very suspicious but you figured they were just being guys. With nothing to do, you made plans with Seulgi and a few other friends for a girls night. But of course, the night that you had plans was the night that the guys wanted to do something.

“How?” You laugh at one of the girls. “How do you manage to score four dudes in one singular night?” You ask. “I can barely get one.”

Everyone at the table laughs at your comment to Lisa. This is what you needed, a fun night out with some girls, and a guy named Mike who had tagged along. It was a good way to get your mind off of things. You took a shot from one of the bottles on the table, beginning to feel tipsy as you eat a little bit of food. You look at Seulgi who is looking at you with a weird look on her face.

“What?” You ask. Her eyes dart over to the left, you look over and see Felix and Hyunjin sitting at a table with two girls you didn't recognize. Your heart sank as you stared at the girls smiling while they're talking. You glance over at the boys, but they don't look like they're enjoying themselves as much as the girls are.

They must have felt your stare, or maybe you stared for too long, but they looked over, directly at you, and seemed shocked to see you. You gave them a slight smile and wave before turning back to your other friends. You tried to ignore them, but you could feel their eyes burning into the side of your head as you spoke, your group drunkenly trying to figure out what to do after dinner.

“Do you guys wanna go to the club?” Mike asks, looking at you. You shrug your shoulders. “I wouldn't say no to dancing there.” You smile, glancing at Felix and Hyunjin, who are now walking over to you.

“Are you guys going to the club?” Hyunjin asks, looking at you. You nod your head, your heart beating quicker. They could do nothing and your heart flutters with butterflies in your stomach.

“We'll see you there.” Felix smiles, walking out of the restaurant with the two girls and Hyunjin. You shake your head, trying to get the thought of them out of your head.

The moment you get to the club, you, Seulgi and Mike head straight for the bar. The three of you take a few shots before heading out to the dance floor, leaving Mike to sit there. You always loved dancing with girlfriends, because you never had to worry about unwanted touching. The two of you danced by yourself for a bit, until Mike decided to join you, and for some reason he had decided he wanted to dance with you. His hands grabbed your hips to pull you in close to him, but you really didn't want to. Seugli had disappeared on you, leaving you to fight him off on your own. He turns you around to face him, his hands roaming your body. You push him away, but he grabs your wrist, holding it tightly.

“I just wanna dance with you.” Mike grits through his teeth. You can see the anger bubbling up through his body.

“I don't want to dance with you. I'm sorry.” You say, trying to free your wrist from his grip.

“One dance. That's all I want. You can't tease me and then not give me what I want.” He scoffs.

“Excuse me?” You yell, pulling your wrist from his grip. “I never fucking teased you. I said no, so fucking listen.” You turn to walk away from him but he grabs you again, holding you even tighter, trying to pull you off the dance floor. You fight him with all you had but he just holds on tighter, pulling you away. Until you halt, you look up and see Hyunjin standing in front of Mike, he's angry. Your wrist is released, Felix now holding onto Mike's hand, twisting his wrist hard, causing Mike to fall to his knees.

“Don't you know what no means?” Felix asks, his voice scary as he glares at Mike. You turn and run to Hyunjin, he wraps his arms around you as he continues to stare at Mike. Felix leans down, whispering into Mike's ear. “You touch her again, I'll fucking kill you. Got it?”

Luckily you don't hear him as you nuzzle into Hyunjin's chest. Until you realize that they had dates, and they needed to get back to them. You felt guilty, it seemed like you were always getting into situations that they needed to save you from and that wasn't fair. You backed away from Hyunjin, looking sad and guilty.

“You guys have dates. They're probably looking for you.” You say, looking up at them both. “Thank you for helping me, and I'm sorry you have to keep saving me.” You whisper.

Felix and Hyunjin look at each other before looking back at you. “Don't apologize.” Hyunjin smiles.

“We'd go to war for you, baby.” Felix winks before he and Hyunjin leave to find the girls they were with. Finally Seulgi comes back, explaining she was waiting in the longest line for the bathroom.

“What happened!? Why are you crying?” She asks.

“Mike.” You sniffle. “He wanted to dance and I didn't. He got really aggressive.” Seulgi looks guilty as she listens to you.

“I'm so sorry.” She whispers, pulling you in for a hug.

“Luckily Hyunjin and Felix saved me.” You chuckle. “I don't know where Mike went off too.”

“Fuck Mike, he's banned from the group now.” She says. “Where did Felix and Hyunjin go?” She asks.

“I sent them back with their dates.” You say. She nods her head.

“What do you wanna do?” She asks. “Stay or go?”

“I'm gonna go. But you stay. Honestly, I just need some air. I'm gonna walk home. I promise I'll be fine. I'll call you when I'm home.” You say, giving a slight smile. She hugs you tightly, and watches you walk out of the club.

You really didn't want to call a cab but you did. You weren't dumb, you knew something bad could happen if you walked. You didn't want to bother any of the boys. You stood outside the club, waiting for your cab and you were annoyed, you felt like you only attracted men who didn't have good intentions and you didn't know why. You just wanted someone.. maybe two men who loved you with everything they had, like you felt for them. Honestly you just wanted Hyunjin and Felix and you didn't know how much longer you could fight off these feelings. It felt like they were bubbling up to your chest now and it was only a matter of them before they made your head explode.

You paid your fare and headed inside your apartment. You turned on your shower to the hottest that you could handle to scrub off the feeling of Mike's hands on your body. You couldn't help thinking about what could have happened to you had Felix and Hyunjin not been there for you. As you finish in the shower, you come out and check your phone seeing an email you'd been waiting for. A few weeks ago you had interviewed for a receptionist job at an elite law office. You nervously opened the email, screaming and dropping your phone in excitement as you jumped around your room. You got the job and you were so happy to not be living off of your savings anymore. You pick up your phone, reading the rest of the email, seeing you still had a few days before you were starting, you were so happy you completely forgot about what had happened that night. You fell asleep quickly, feeling like everything was going to be okay.

The next morning you woke up, in a great mood and ready for the day. You looked at your phone, seeing a message from Felix.

[9:58am From Felix] Morning, Can I take you to lunch today? I need to talk to you.

A knot immediately formed in your stomach. This was going to be bad. He's going to end the friendship or something. He was probably tired of you and your shit. You didn't want to go, but you needed to know. Your anxiety wouldn't let you not know and you wouldn't be able to function.

[10:09am To Felix] That doesn't sound good. Let me know when and where.

[10:11am From Felix] Same restaurant as last night. Meet you there at 11:30am]

You don't reply. You can't. You can feel the lump in your throat getting bigger. You tried your best to get ready, to make yourself look decent but you were on the verge of tears and you couldn't control it. The thought of losing one of your best friends was devastating.

You sit at the table, your fingers interlaced as you wait for Felix. Your head is down as you try to breathe through the anxiety. You hear the door open, your head shoots up and you see Felix and Hyunjin walk in. There are no smiles, no happy greetings and you knew this was going to be bad. The two men sit down, across from you, staring at you.

“Did you order?” Felix asks, looking at the menu.

“I can't eat right now.” You whisper. Fuck. Your tears were going to start spilling right away.

“Neither can I.” He sighs, closing the menu. “Look, the reason I asked you to lunch and that Hyunjin joined too is that we really need to talk to you about something.” He says.

The tears fall as you look at them. They're now staring at you confused.

“Why are you crying?” Hyunjin asks, reaching over to wipe your tears.

“I don't want to lose you guys.” You cry. They look at each other before looking back at you.

“Why are you losing us?” Felix asks.

“Isn't that what this is? You're ending the friendship?” You ask.

Felix laughs. “I guess in a sense.” He says. He reaches over and grabs your hands. “This isn't about ending anything. More so taking it to the next level.”

You stare at him. “next level? Like ultimate best friends?’ you ask.

They both laugh, and then stone faces as they take a deep breath. “I'm falling in love with you.” Felix admits.

“What?” You whisper.

“And I'm falling in love with you.” Hyunjin admits. “And we don't know what to do.”

“We don't want to ruin things if you don't feel the same but neither of us could hold it in any longer.” Felix says.

Suddenly the tears flow, you take your hands back to cover your face as you sob. Neither of them say a word as you cry. Until Felix's phone rings.

“Yeah Chan?” He answers. “Fuck. Now? Shit okay, we're on our way.” He says. He looks at Hyunjin who immediately knows what's going on.

“We gotta go. But we're having a party tonight. Please come and we can talk.” Felix tells you as they both stand up and walk out the door.

You're in shock. That's not at all how you thought that conversation was going to go.

They are both falling in love with you. And you're already in love with them both. What do you do? Do you choose one and leave one heartbroken, while also leaving yourself heartbroken. Did you date both? Could you date both? Would they be okay with that? You stand up and head home, your mind swirling with thoughts on what to do. You couldn't believe it.

Later that night you got yourself ready for the party, you were very confident on what you were going to do. And you hoped they didn't ask you to choose because you wouldn't be able to. You wanted to give dating both of them both a try. If the three of you put in the effort, you were sure that you guys could do it.

You walk through the door of the party, seeing the house was filled with people. Changbin and Han run up to you, engulfing you in hugs before Han demands another beer chugging rematch.

“We will, later.” You laugh. “Do you know where Felix and Hyunjin are?” You ask.

“I think in the kitchen.” He tells you, going over to say hi to someone else. You make your way to the kitchen, seeing Felix standing there talking to someone. You take a deep breath, and head straight for him. He smiles as he sees you walk up to him. You press up against his chest, sliding your hand on the back of his head, pulling his head down closer to you. He stares into your eyes as you move your face closer and closer, until your lips touch his. As soon as your lips touch, he takes control. He spins you around, pinning you against the fridge as he deepens the kiss, slipping his tongue into your mouth.

Felix breaks the kiss, stepping away from you with a grin on his face. You look past him seeing Hyunjin standing there. You motion him to come to you with your finger. He walks towards you, and you move past Felix, grabbing onto Hyunjin's collar and pulling him down. His lips touch yours and he quickly slides his tongue into your mouth, hardening the kiss.

He pulls away from you, grinning at you and Felix. You guide Hyunjin to stand next to Felix and you clear your throat as you look at both of them.

“I can't choose, and I won't choose. I'm falling hard for you both and I want you both. If you're okay with that then I'm all in, but if you're not then it won't work.” You tell them.

“I'm in.” Hyunjin smiles.

“I'm all in.” Felix says. You were so fucking happy in this moment. You kissed them both before grabbing some celebratory shots. The three of you take a few shots before you drag them both to the living room to dance. You feel as though you're in heaven, grinding your ass into Felix and Hyunjin grinds in front of you. Your happiness is short lived, as the front door busts open and in walks eight men, one of which you recognize. The music shuts off as Chan, Changbin, Jeogin, Minho, Han, Felix and Hyunjin stand in front of the intruders.

“What the hell are you doing here Hongjoong?” Chan yells. The man just laughs.

“What? You thought you could start doing illegal mods on cars and I wouldn't fucking find out?” He yells.

What was going on?

“Is business slow?” Chan asks. “Maybe if you were better at your job, you wouldn't lose so many clients.” He says, fake pouting. Hongjoong turns red as anger consumes him.

“Me and you. A race now, the winner keeps doing mods, and the loser closes up shop.” He yells. Everyone begins cheering but you feel confused. You'd heard about street racing, but you had no idea that they were involved in it. You look at Felix and Hyunjin, who look guilty.

“Y/N.” You hear from across the room. You look over and a familiar man walks over to you. You squint your eyes as he comes closer, and then it hits you. It was San. You had a mini fling with him years ago and ended on good terms and as friends.

“San! Oh my god.” You laugh, running up to him, wrapping your arms around him. “So good to see you.” You laugh, letting go of the large man. Hyunjin and Felix are on each side of you, glaring at their enemy.

“Get your hands off of her.” Felix snaps, pulling you back, and closer to him.

“We used to hook up.” San winks. You roll your eyes.

“If you can even call it that.” You laugh.

“It was good to see you, Y/N.” He says, winking at you before walking towards his group. You turn to Hyunjin and Felix, a stern look on your face.

“Street racing?” You gasp.

“Y/N.. listen.” Hyunjin starts.

“How long?” You ask. “How long have you guys been doing this shit and why didn't you tell me?”

“Since before we met.” Felix says. “It's not that we didn't want to tell you.”

“We just wanted to protect you.” Hyunjin says. “We're involved with a lot of dangerous people. We just want to keep you safe.”

“Hyunjin, Felix. Let's go.” Chan yells. The crowd disperses, heading out to wherever the race is going to be.

“Go to one of our rooms.” Felix says. “We'll be back in a bit.”

You scoff at the handsome man. “Absolutely not.” You deadpan.

“I'm coming with you.”

#lee felix #hwang hyunjin #stray kids #felix smut #hyunjin smut #stray kids smut #kpop fanfic #kpop writing #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #skz x reader #skz imagines #skz smut #skz fanfic #skz

[frecklystars]

Hi, I need some help if anyone has advice or something. Or even just a “that’s rough buddy”

Last night I had one of the worst breakdowns I’ve had in a long time bc I saw a commission of my abuser with stsc. She commissions artists just about every single day of herself with TF characters, so I always avoid the tumblr search tags. Even non-TF artists I feel wary of bc it doesn’t matter, if you’re an artist and your comms are open, she will buy from you and it’s always her self insert/OC. I never look up self shipping or transformers or anything like that in the tumblr search. I never interact with anything she’s a part of. But this time I was simply searching up something entirely unrelated in a browser, and she just - she showed up. She fucking showed up! All of this time I take to be so careful, to limit my tumblr experience drastically just to protect myself, and yet I still see her. I cannot believe how easy it is to find my abuser floating around online because she commissions people every single day. I wasn’t even on tumblr and I still managed to see her. It was just… Google images. No keywords that could have possibly led to me seeing that, but she showed up as one of the first results in the images and I just. had the worst reaction ever. Understandably

It was her pink OC, and very long story I won’t bother you with, my abuser’s pink OC is the reason why the color pink became a cptsd trigger for me in 2022, and I was really struggling with that shit when it was fresh. Obviously I got better with it because uh, I’m a Barbie blog now, but I still have my bad days with it and I’ve never been fully okay with pink. I never feel fully “safe” around it. Which sucks. But I was at the point where I could tolerate it. Well, until now 😭 ugh

Seeing my abuser was already a big shock, obviously horrible. Seeing my abuser be lovey and soft with stsc was also really horrible. But seeing the pink and immediately my brain saying “oh look it’s pink, that’s dangerous, but maybe it’s Barbie pi— ohhh nooo, that’s your abuser, she’s right there!!! That’s her!!! In the pink!!! I told you pink was a trigger!!! You’re in danger now you’re gonna die!!!” makes me feel like I’ve gone backwards in my healing process and I’m afraid that’s irreversible. I know healing isn’t linear and I know setbacks are normal, but this feels different. It was Barbie pink, like the hot magenta color you see on the album cover? I feel sick typing this jfc. My abuser is now associated with Barbie pink in my brain. I don’t know how to fix this. It used to be more of a milky pink that would bother me bc THAT is what her OC color used to be, but now apparently she’s? Barbie pink???? And a paranoid part of me believes she might have changed it on purpose just to fuck with me because she knows I see her commissions everywhere I go, because one of our last conversations we ever had was her saying she was fully aware how much her own s/i was a trigger for me. This is so much worse bc now every time I see Barbie Pink I’m not gonna think of Barbie! I’m thinking of the person who nearly fucking killed me multiple times!

I was doing soo much better with my pink trigger. I associated pink with how safe and loved Barbie and Ken make me feel. The hot magenta Barbie Pink made me feel the safest because that’s LITERALLY Barbie pink. I would still get tense seeing it but then I’d immediately say to myself “that’s Barbie pink. That’s Barbies color. Barbie would never let my abuser come near me, because she’s a girls girl, and she’s smart, she would not allow herself to be manipulated, she’d keep me safe” etc etc. and I would almost immediately be totally fine with looking at the color, my tense feeling would melt away most of the time. i was doing so much better but now it’s like this is ruining all of my progress. My abuser’s main color now is Barbie pink and I feel really sick.

I’m extremely shaken up over not just seeing my abuser again, in a commission no less (which she’d often use against me, so seeing TF commissions of any sort give me bad reactions, hence why I don’t even look at TF fanart whatsoever even if I wasn’t triggered by the actual franchise) but also seeing the very Thing that turned pink into a trigger in the first place. I feel very hopeless bc I miss stsc but seeing him be romantic in a commission with my abuser, on top of the trauma associated with him just in general because of said abuser, makes me feel so impossible to reach him. So not only do I feel hopeless and miss my starlight so fucking badly, as I do everyday, but now I feel worse with the color pink. I don’t want this to ruin Barbie for me. I don’t want to be scared of the very thing that was helping me heal this far.

I don’t know how to fix this. I’m hoping I will eventually bounce back from this major trigger of seeing my abuser AND tf together, like this was a triple hit on me, had three major triggers in one image — I’m just hoping I’ll… move on?? And then maybe pink will go back to being tolerable again? But I’m scared it won’t. I’m scared I really cannot heal no matter what I try to do

Anyway idk what kind of advice I’m even asking for, maybe reassurance that it’s gonna be ok. Or something 😔 literally anything helps I don’t care WHAT it is, if anyone can spare something nice in my inbox or the replies, I will super appreciate it

#vent #ptsd #ok so. actually I’ve queued this post and I’m not online rn . i am hopefully asleep #but when I wake up I will read and appreciate any messages 😭

[lotus-sunn]

@katentines this is your fault/pos

So lotus-moonn I have been THINKING ABOUT HER. And I decided since my pfp is sweet mikey I thought maybe if lotus-moonn existed

they would use covert-mike (Mikhali) as their pfp since well if you know anything about covert mikey then its fairly obvious why I choosed him

I thought of her personality and I conclude..Shes a fucking dick. or atleast more blunt and straight forward not caring about someones feelings and wouldnt see the reason to soften the blow. Would say "that looks like shit" to your face and call you out for more of your wrong doings

I love the DRAMATICS but i think too much is wack so maybe she would have a love for all types of dramatics.

I love to make a good first impression and I am pretty sensitive when it comes to being yelled at in a aggressive way. I start to cry as the yelling continues, so she would NEVER (rarely) cry. It would take a lot for her to cry, and first impression? who gives a shit she is gonna do what she wants and not give a shit if you like her or not.

Not a hugger or very touchy its rare for her to even touch anyone (fucking insane i know) Suprisnly less of a realist. (im a realist) More of a lets just do it and find out. Doesnt care for people who overthink she doesnt get it. like cmon your thinking too much LETS GO.

Not much for reading feelings she just freezes if they confide in her. She is pretty serious. If you told her a joke she would take it literally.

social cues??? she doesnt know what that is?? context clues what??

(fucking dumbass)

Doesnt swear. literally man she doesnt. I swear like sailor so she wouldnt. Why use swears when you can insult someone in more creative ways? she doesnt get the appeal.

really really smart in the education level. Works slow and good, doesnt work well under pressure.

opptimistic? no? but also yes.

one thing I wont change. She is stubborn but not me type stubborn. She is fucking STUBBORN once she decides something its set in bedrock she ingraved it into its very core your not changing her mind

(people trying to rehabiltate lotus-moon get meet with her fist)

was a kid who was more reckless and got more injuries (i was the same. but she actually broke a bone.)

faking confidence? she doesnt do that depressing bullshit. her confidence is real but that gets in the way of most of goals she has so much faith in herself she grows arrogant. She thinks that whatever she puts her mind to WILL happen doesnt matter who come in the way

fighting? HELL YEAH. SHE FIGHTS WITH ALL HER MIGHT! exploding PASSION!

I dont get sick easily. She does tho (LOSER COULDNT BE ME) its cold and she doesnt wear a scarf and jacket GET SICK BITCH (and very sensitve when sick. Im not i can function well enough. she is like fucking DEAD like family guy dead pose.)

hopeless romantic? fuck no romance is icky she doesnt like it.

very Social. ikr what the fuck?? if anything she wouldnt be. And you'd be right but Im not very social i have a close friend group of 5 people THATS IT. so she would be very social despite her dumbass not knowing of social cues.

#ive been thinking about this for a while #and I thought of my personality and since evil lotus-sun is well evil. she would be the complete opposite of me #so I mapped my personality and reversed it. #in a way I would admire her. #but whos to say. #WAIT HOLD ON SHE WOULD TALK LIKE THAT. #''but whos to say.'' SHE WOULD TALK KINDA LIKE THAT #lotus-moonn

[trials-era-sam]

Gonna get chick-flick-momenty for a minute if you don’t mind!!!!!

In 2018 I told myself, “it’s already season 13, the show is bound to end sooner or later and I’ve already been watching this show and been obsessed with it for almost 10 years, I HAVE to meet Jared this year.” I got incredibly lucky that this was the one and only year Creation decided to host a con in Birmingham, UK, a city I’d already been to and felt comfortable going to on my own (unlike Rome haha) and that very first con was AMAZING. Had a great photo op with Jared - but most of all, got to meet my amazing friend @malnourishedsamdean who became my convention buddy. We’ve now gone to three more cons together, only one of which Jared did not cancel - whether he was there or not though, he may be our fave but we had tons of fun and made up for it by meeting more of the cast!!!! - and it would have been four had I not made stupid financial decisions, but oh well. I’ll always treasure these memories with C and hope to make more, and we also met some amazing people there!!!!

Then last year I went to my first JIBcon, finally confident enough to do it having been to Rome in the meantime, but mostly confident because I was going with the wonderful @schielegon and had SUCH a fun time ♥️♥️♥️ the events were incredibly fun (especially a meet and greet where Jared gave me the very last question 🥰) BUT the highlight was definitely meeting this gal I just tagged as well as @ghost-go-roasty-mctoasty , @arwenadreamer , @takikojou and other lovely people <333

There was also that one con that C and I booked on my 28th birthday and only got to go when I was 31, but I don’t think I need to explain why, no one needs the reminder lol. It was SO worth the wait - especially because our beloved @jellybracelet got to come with us <3333

JIB was so amazing I nagged her and @seanwinchester to come this year, and we just had the most wonderful, wonderful weekend because these guys are the most fun, and met more lovely people 🥰🥰 can’t even put it into words because of the sleep deprivation but I’m still floating on that high!!!!

And now that I’ve told my life story as if I was a fan asking Jared and/or Jensen a question,

TL;DR - I feel so, so incredibly lucky and happy. I really hope this doesn’t come across as braggy and I’m sorry if it does - I genuinely, genuinely want everyone to experience stuff like this. It’s the absolute best. I don’t think another show would have provided me with the happiness, the memories and the FRIENDS this show has. I’m so grateful to all of you and also to the cast who will never read this ♥️♥️♥️♥️ they say never to meet your heroes but my interactions with Jared have been so great, he really is as kind and funny and sunshiny as he seems (yes I know I am parasocializing hard idc) and, as I don’t think I’m stopping cons now because they’re so addicting (HOW HAVE I ALREADY BEEN TO SIX. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ONE), I’m so excited to meet more of you in the future <33333 I love you all so so so so much this is the best community ever!!!!!!!!!

Also now that it’s on yt for everyone to see and while I’m pouring my heart out, hi! I’m Anaëlle. Please continue to call me Ana <33 but know that I freaked out hard when Danneel’s character had my name in the show lmao

#personal #long post #I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH

[whumpsoda]

The Hunters

WOHEO Masterlist

Takes place directly after this!

cw: referenced character death

———————————————————————

There were two of them.

Two thralls, huddled together in a heap of a tight embrace, sobbing and wailing gut wrenching sounds that mauled her insides with pity. Such horrid noises of sorrow had never before graced her ears, shivering her insides tight. They’d been stuck in such a horrid state for at least an hour.

The group was forced to stand about idly and wait for them to calm from their hysterics, a point drawing near. Everyone’s bellies bubbled with anxiousness, praying they would make it back before dark.

Months she’d been readying for such a moment. Weeks, days, so very many hours of training and preparing her mind and body to hunt disgustingly wretched creatures of the night and save their captives, working for the good of the people.

How could one ever be prepared for this?

“We…” Eli started, studying the two souls with teary eyes. Her guts clenched with dreary sickness, disgust dripping from her tensing chest. “We need to get the bodies out of here.”

“We’ve tried five times already.” Jude stood back with a mix of horrifying disinterest. “We can maybe grab the orange one with the little guy not attacking us again, but the other is in that one’s arms. We’re never getting that away from him.” He pointed to the bigger thrall, the one hunched over who had been the source of the worst of the shrieks. Eli had suppressed the urge to wrap him in the warmest of hugs when she’d failed to calm him earlier.

“They’re… so upset.” Too upset, and she detested it. Seeing them so distraught over monsters who had stolen their lives and minds with no remorse, feeding off of them like leeches. Grinding them down to dust under their shoes and priding themselves on it, forcing them to continue their blind worship even after their long deserved deaths.

“No shit.”

Her nails were digging into the tense flesh of her fist. “I just don’t want to see them like this. I… hate it. Stop… stop acting like this is all okay.” How could everyone act so normal? It sickened her stomach.

“I’m not saying I like it either. I don’t.” Jude’s voice dropped soft for just a moment, expression genuine, which it rarely was. “You know what we have to do.”

She knew. She knew. They’d been arguing about it since before they even arrived. But she wouldn’t.

Gnawing on her lip Eli’s heart inched quicker, beating with increasing anxiousness. “We… need to get them out of here.” Outside she appeared calm and collected like the rest of them, the facade of fine, as if none of such horror had affected her. On the inside her cracks were creaking, nearly on the verge of crumbling.

Jude only chuckled, irritating to her ears. As if none of it affected him. “And where are they gonna go?”

“With… us…” Her heart was pounding out of her chest, filling her ears with a continuous buzz. Eli knew they couldn’t. She knew no one else would allow such an arrangement.

“Eli, you know we’ve got to do it.”

She cut in with trembling authority. “Shut up. This isn’t the time to joke.”

She was plenty aware he was not kidding.

“Eli. Look at them. We have to. It’s procedure.”

“Put the gun away. Now.” She commanded with booming authority, and he backed off, just a smidge, weapon dipping to the floor.

Deeply and through her chest, she took a breath. “Just… let me do something.” Fortunately, he failed to make any attempt to stop her as she began her venture toward the two intertwined men.

Eli stepped over one of the creatures, it’s corpse nearly spreading a grin over her lips. She so terribly wanted to step on it, squash its rotting face in until it no longer resembled a human. Instead she controlled herself, not wanting to put the victims through any more horrors.

“Excuse me.” Eli whispered, voice kept soft and honeyed as she descended to her knees beside one of the men. He was large and loud, in so much unimaginable anguish she would never so much as begin to comprehend. She very well knew that. “May I talk to you? Is that alright?”

He hiccuped and sniveled, mind boggled by despair. He supplied no response. The other one, tangled around his shoulder, gifted the worst and deepest of glares she had ever seen, burning a hole in her face.

“I’m not going to hurt you guys. I won’t touch you one bit if you don’t want me to. I’ll stay right here.” She soothed, the tips of her toes rocking against the floor with a calming grin. “I’m only here to help you, and to keep you safe. Okay? Will you let me do that?”

The louder of the two whimpered, a strangled whine slipping past his quivering lips.

“What do, do you want?” The fiery one spat in return, baring his teeth in offensive desperation.

He sounded so angry, yet so terribly frightened and timid all the same, picking away at her heart strings. “I want to help you. Is that okay?” Eli asked, giving him the most gentle of a tone she could muster.

“You’re lying. Don’t lie.” He insisted, voice cracking and wavering, clutching only tighter around his friend of which who nuzzled deeper into him.

“I promise I’m not.” She carefully held out her hand, pinky finger outstretched. “Pinky promise.”

“Don’t… don’t care.” He growled back, wavering with uneasiness and obviously inching sorrow, tugging his anger to shreds.

“I understand. I wouldn’t trust me either if I was in your situation.”

“Did, did…” With watering, tear pricking eyes he softened to pitiful mush under the weight of his despair. “You hurt master. You did, you did, I know you did.”

“I…” She was going to lie. What else could she do? What could she do? He had to trust her, or unknowingly he would wind up dead. “I never hurt your master. I swear on it. I’m only here to help you.”

“W- why?”

Eli’s calming grin only faltered for a second. “Because I want you two safe and happy.”

His face scrunched up at the flick of a wrist, gloopy tears beginning to fall at fast pace, choking his words and mind. “I, I was happy… with, with Master…”

She nodded. “I know, baby. I know.”

“I want Master! Want Master!” He cried, wiping his face over the shoulder of the other thrall, who in return sobbed into his.

She swallowed, thick and juicy and horridly guilty. “I’ll keep you safe… until your master comes back, okay? Is that alright?” She barely knew what stumbled from her mouth, the only goal to spark something from him. Whether that be an ounce of trust or hope, or whatever could get the two out of such a situation.

His face lit up quick, brightening with such a glimmer of hope she’d never expected. How could she be so terrible? “Master, Master’s coming, coming back? R- really?”

Eli hesitated. “Yeah, s- sure. They’ll come back nice and fine if you just come with us. We’ll keep you plenty safe while they’re gone.”

Thinking it over, her speech digesting and turning the wheels of his brain, he gradually agreed. “Oh… ‘kay… okay… I’m, I’m sorry, thank you… thank you, sir, thank you.”

Good. Good. If this one trusted her, she would have nothing to worry about. If she could just get them to safety, somehow find them some help and a place to stay, they would be fine. She could only hope. “Nothing to be sorry about, sweetheart. Everything is just fine.”

He met her gaze with those doe, pleading eyes of his, so eager for the safety and kindness he dearly deserved. She would do her best to provide it. “P- promise? Promise? Please?”

“Pinky promise.”

———————————————————————

Taglist- @softvampirewhump @iys-cloud @battyfantasy @xx-adam-xx @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl

@mylifeisonthebookshelf @mis-graves @3-2-whump

If anyone wants to be removed or added to the taglist, please let me know! :)

#we only have each other #writing #whump writing #my writing #whump #whumpblr #whump story #hypnotized whumpee #brainwashed whumpee #hypnotized #brainwashing #Nevan oc #Malak oc #Eli oc #Jude oc

[kn11ves]

emotional support group for autistics who got called condescending and rude as kids just for responding to things directly and still not knowing how they were being mean

#what did i do #i got constantly told by my mother and step father (and his family) that i always talked like i knew better than they did or that i was #just as mature. i was just fuckjng talking what the hell did you want me to do #why do you feel attacked when a 10 year old speaks to you as an adult????? literally what #i dont know on that note sometimes its just like i dont even feel like ive aged at all #sure i have a giant explosion of time in my head just Gone from my memory because i was getting abused but like i dont feel like ive aged #or really matured ive felt like ive alwats felt #i cant relate when epople are like me when i feel all my ages or i wish i could go back to being x age or being x age everything felt so #different..like no it didnt. or im missing something? #i have never in my life felt like anything has changed. ive always been this old. there is no ''inner child'' and ive never had childhood #innocence or a nostalgia or childhood to go back to. i have no idea what any of you are talking about ever👍 #ugh jst rmemebred skmething that happened with my white step dad's mother #we visited her house and she literally fucking didnt let me go (not physically) until i replied to her with Correct Granmar. what was i #doing? i was reaponding to her by saying ''yeah'' and she kept repeating ''yes'' like telling me to say yes instead of yeah and i didnt #Fucking Get It because guess what you old white cracker i barely fucking speak english and you are just saying things in an aggressive tone #like thats gonna make me get it. and i Didnt i just kept replying yrah to her yes's and then she got tired of it and we left out the door #and theeeeen i got yelled at in the car by being called disrespectful and rude by my parents. WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO????????? #those crackers never liked me LOL i literally know they didnt #ugh i rmemeber this one time my step dads father was like trying to show me some dumb boxing or karate or something punching move and he #told my mother that i was good at it because he felt i had a lot of aggression and then NY MOTHER YELLED AT ME IN THE CAR FOR IT?????? #oh fucking wonder why te kid being abused mighthave aggression but she didnt Know (apart from what She was doing to me) like why would it #be my fucking fault if he thought i had aggression in me HOW IS THAT MY FAULT WHAT DIDBI DO I WAS JUST TRYING TO DO THE MOVE BECAUSE WELL #I WAS TRYING TO GET ALONG BECAUSE THATS WHAT THEY WANTED ME TO DO #she was like do you know how much that embarassed me and WHAT THE HELL HE SAID IT I DIDNT I WAS LIKE #8??? OR SOMETHING???? I DONT FUCKING KNOW!!! I DIDNT KNOW WOMAN WHAT DID YOU WANT FROM ME #mothers when they mother👍

[trannakinskywalker]

.

#s.a. mention incoming-> #I'm realising ng more and more i need to maybe get professional help im just being a pussy about it #last time i tried the therapist (who was from israel but i didn't know wjen i booked her) immediately victim blamed me #for my own assault when i was crying telling her what happened #literally the only person i had told at that point even though it was a year and a hakf later #it was so vile how are you gonna ask someone what THEY did to make that situation happen #ig it gave me trust issues with therapists bcs i havent tries ti find one again but atp #i need to talk with someone i feel lik i am nearing a breaking point as certsin habits and patterns are accumulating #i can recognise this migt lead somewhere bad tje pattenrs never lie! #this is such a pointless rant and i am mad bevause i was doing so well #the last thing i need to be cruel to myself #i need to find someone that isnt just going to say oh wow youre so self aware ok that'll be $150 #like bro i am slipping

[kaeyapilled]

. (tw heterosexuality)

#i am having the worst sexuality crisis of my life. i was so sure i was a lesbian but there is this One Guy.. #he makes me feel things. i think. but i cant categorize them #relationships w men sound.. unappealing.. if i think about it generally #like a random man? sounds weird. or maybe not. i dont know. i havent even had a first kiss lmao i dont really know stuff #but him............oh...........hes so funny and cool and nice to everyone. his hands are pretty (weird thing to notice but ok) #he explains math to me and i cant focus because he's too close. thats so MORTIFYING I THOUGHT I WAS A DYKE #but at the same time 12 year old me was having heart palpitations around my first girl crush and shit #and he hasnt made me feel anything that strong so far. so. idk. but also i was 12. so idk #well okay generally speaking women make me feel much more doing way less #there was this occasion where this girl who i always had a mild thing for but never did anything about it just came up to me #at school #and just. haha lol i had a dream about you last night ;) #i am not joking when i say i felt weak in the knees. she was smiling in a like playful way so i was gonna make a joke but i could not #because i was going to pass out from being too gay #this guy (or any other guy for that matter) doesn't seem to have the power to make me feel like that #..........am i bisexual with a female lean or whatever people say. or am i experiencinf the worst case of comphet of my life #this is awful. not because i don't wanna like men (its just sexuality idc) but because i don't want to prove my mom right #😭what if it WAS a phase #but who knows. mentioning the girl who dreamt about me kind of replaced the thoughts i was having of him for a bit there #i miss her she was nice. well sort of. but i was never involved in the drama so who cares fr. she graduated last year #anyways sorry for breaking character. tumblr user kaeyapilled is lore dropping

[silverislander]

i really fucking hate that at 21 i still have strict rules abt shit i can and can't do but more than that i hate that i don't do anything about i

#my friends are all sleeping over at one of our houses tonight so i asked to go #i am still not fucking allowed to go to sleepovers apparently. and i still dont know why #i spent all week worrying abt when and how it would be best to ask and arguments i could make to convince my mom #and when i finally asked her she immediately shut me down and instead i just fucking. rolled with it and said nothing #so i guess somehow at 21 fucking years old were still doing the 'you can go until midnight then come home' thing that 8yr olds do #levi.txt #vent tw #and theres NEVER going to be a better time than this to let me do it. its my friend of 5+yrs mom knows her parents and trusts them #hell her dad was a police chief. were not going to do Anything that were not allowed to do in his house #but no i still just get 'you know i dont like sleepovers' and 'youre not taking the car overnight'. no explanation no debate #and i didnt say ANYTHING to defend myself bc i let my family say fucking anything and get away w it every time #at this rate ill be 30 w no backbone still living in this fucking house istg #and its not even like ive ever once given her a reason to put restrictions like this on me! ive been well behaved my entire life #i have never once broken a major rule or disobeyed her in any meaningful way ive Always done what she wanted. no matter what #ive literally been almost perfectly behaved other than normal kid stuff i have tried so fucking hard to make them happy #my parents are just insanely fucking overprotective and always have been #not being allowed to do these kinds of things is exactly why i never had friends growing up #bc how are you gonna be friends with someone who never shows up outside of school and cant watch anything with cursing in it