#like on some level he has not articulated to himself i think he is probably both worried about how him having kids would make jin ling feel

[marie-mcd]

Amongst the Aziraphale appreciation posts I see, there's a big thing that I think is often missed and deserves pointing out!

(I'm not sure if this is an unpopular opinion or if it's something so obvious that it goes without saying, and thus hasn't been said; so I am either throwing myself to the wolves here or to the crickets. Here I go!)

In short, I think sheltering Gabriel in S2E1 was undeniably the right thing to do, and I admire Aziraphale for it. The ensuing fight with Crowley might distract some people from seeing this.

Initially it was a snap decision whose rationale was probably along the lines of "Ohshit, this is insane, everyone is staring, this situation has to stop right now, just get in and I'll get rid of you later."

But then it becomes clear to Aziraphale that Gabriel is a person who needs help. This is a special situation in which his antagonist is currently helpless. If he turns Gabriel away, it's only a matter of time before the other angels find him (granted, Azi doesn't have all the information yet here, but it's not a huge leap for him to suspect heaven being part of the threat), and in the meantime he could be hurt or even be discorporated by humans or by accident, and presumably end up back in heaven where Something Terrible awaits.

To articulate what I think the thought process might be in this situation, I'll borrow a quote from Miss Level from A Hat Full of Sky: "You can't not help people just because they're stupid or forgetful or unpleasant. Everyone's poor round here. If I don't help them, who will?" He's able to set aside his feelings and risk his own comfort and possibly his safety to help someone clearly in need, despite their past. The reason this is admirable is because this is difficult to do.

I understand why Aziraphale was upset with Crowley (and acted a bit pissy) during their blow-up. Not only is it not unreasonable to be upset about being bailed on in a high stress situation, it's also disappointing that Crowley's proposed solution was to dump Gabriel somewhere to fend for himself - Aziraphale knows and we know that Crowley is usually kind and moral, not to mention rational (and we even see him being kind to Jim/Gabriel later). It's also worth noting that Aziraphale never implies that he thinks Crowley is a bad person for not helping; he asks for help, is upset to not get it, and suggests Crowley leaves because they're obviously at an impasse.

I see Crowley's side too, because it's also not unreasonable to get upset when your partner springs an unexpected stressful situation on you, and it was wise to leave when it was clear that they were both too emotional to work on a proper solution.

We all want to enjoy our precious, fragile existence on earth and not have to deal with curveballs, but I see this problem as the "worse" part of "for better or for worse". I might have seen things differently if Aziraphale was sheltering someone like Hastur, but he's helping his own antagonist, not Crowley's. I for one like to think that Crowley would have returned to help anyway after processing his emotions, even without the threat to Aziraphale's existence. And when he does return I like that he maintains an attitude of "I'll help but I don't have to like it!"

(Side note, it's also hilarious how irritated Aziraphale is by Jim later while Crowley is so patient - another case of doing the right thing but not necessarily liking it).

TLDR: I see their fight as emotional reactions to stress, that can be summed up along the lines of "I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at the situation!" Aziraphale's a BAMF in my book for doing what he believes was right.

#good omens 2 #good omens #good omens meta #aziraphale appreciation #neil gaiman #terry pratchett #azicrow #aziraphale and crowley #crowley and aziraphale #crowley x aziraphale #aziraphale x crowley #a hat full of sky #ineffable husbands #ineffable spouses #p

[bleachbleachbleach]

Saw your reblog on tragic unrequited platonic love and technically, that trope definitely applies to the betrayed trio, especially on Hinamori’s end (depends on whether or not you subscribe to the view that she was crushing on Aizen). The way I saw it in my initial viewing of bleach, it was more of the type of intense admiration for an authority figure that can be misconstrued as a crush cuz you (the devotee) lack the ways to properly articulate it. Like how u feel abt the rlly cool English teacher u sometimes eat lunch with before they get arrested for like fraud or something. After experiencing the Horrors, of course Kira and Hinamori are going to imprint hard on the first semblance of stability and symbol of safety at the time. So that what they went thru meant something. Also, let me take this moment to briefly gush abt the headcanon u presented in the B3 fic cinematic universe abt hinamori’s fixating on squad 5 because it offers her the knowledge beyond her town that she’s lowkey seeking + the values she wants to strive towards (source: from afar). These nerds just wanted to be mentored so badddd!! Thus, the reveal of the fact that they were only a means to an end, specifically chosen on where they fall on the “easy to manipulate” scale hits HARDER. All that devotion?? Loss of work life balance and for WHATTT? Extended medical leave ? 😭 oh bleach my fave workplace sitcom AND workplace drama u will always be famous

PS: thank u for tagging me in that post!! In the process of drafting my response. It was so lovely of you.

You're right! That totally works here. It's interesting because (and I'll just focus on Hinamori here, because otherwise I'd feel compelled to honor the distinctions between her and Aizen vs. Kira and Ichimaru and Hisagi and Tousen, and this would probably end up reading very convolutedly) I think it kind of asks a question about when the platonic pining would have happened.

Is the pining part of suddenly realizing the disjuncture between what Hinamori thought something was and what Aizen did, and mourning something lost (and something that never really was)?

Or was there also pining when things were Good? We see Aizen be reassuring to Hinamori and generous with his time, etc. and we see Hinamori happy to receive from him, and quite devoted both to her VCship as well as to Aizen on a person level (or as he put it, "as a man" lol). We know she's well-respected by her division, and esteemed by her colleagues (okay, Kira and Hitsugaya may have some bias in this arena, but they both describe her as highly skilled).

But was she needed? Was she doing, and did she get the opportunity to do, things that Aizen couldn't do better? Did she have opportunities to express things that Aizen found interesting or outside of his expertise? Even as they are not equals--and there is no expectation that they should be--in the most fruitful mentorships, both parties have things to teach and learn.

Did Hinamori ever look at other Captain/VC relationships and yearn for pieces of what those looked like to her? Nanao would probably say "god i hope not" because Kyouraku's "reliance" on her often takes the shape of her having to do all the busywork and also herd cats, but in spite of this there's an intimacy there, an openness or trust, that Hinamori might yearn for. And that's taking Kyouraku--shadowy and full of many surfaces himself--into account. Hitsugaya and Matsumoto also have something that both Hitsugaya and Matsumoto probably complain about to Hinamori, but there's a degree of mutualism and collaboration to whatever's going on at the 10th that Hinamori might not mind a taste of, too. Renji has been Byakuya's VC for a month but Hinamori has probably already thought to herself "Kuchiki-taichou let him do WHAT" at least twice. Even though Byakuya is Byakuya, judging by how they handled their "meeting Ichigo in the street" mission, it seems like Byakuya lets Renji have his little projects. Like Renji is part of his investment portfolio and Byakuya feels very comfortable considering Renji a volatile but potentially valuable property and in order to get that ROI you need to stick with him through several honorless tech startup busts and commit long-term to the thing. Er, but I digress. My point is, Renji gets projects. "Develop training menu." Creative opportunity! With a result that has Renji all over it.

Does Hinamori get projects? Does it ever feel like she's pushing the envelope of what the 5th can be and how it can function on her own, without it being something Aizen already predicted the outcome of, or was actually his idea that he let her propose and take nominal ownership of anyway? Despite being completely blindsided by the actuality of Aizen, was there already that sense of inevitability/Aizen all over everything that happens at the 5th? (Competing, of course, with Hinamori's self-concept as a creative person; and her love of Aizen as a person, not just as a boss and mentor; and feeling as though she just needs to excel more and be creative better and she'll eventually meet this need she feels--it's not the environment that's the issue. She's happy here. Mostly. She doesn't need to leave, she simply needs to surpass--)

#hinamori momo #aizen sousuke #bleach headcanons #thank you for reading my fanfic! <3 ToT <3 #and i look forward to your meme responses! #asks #no brain just bleach

[toxicanonymity]

Ugh that extra scene broke my heart. I went back and read the scene where she kissed him just to break my heart a little more. Love your writing 🖤

Thank you 🖤  Extra Scene / Raider Joel master list

No one asked for my analysis but I’m gonna give it anyway lol. This is me talking, not him.  I’m not saying he’s consciously aware of all this.  

You’re asking him questions that he doesn’t want to ask himself and that he doesn’t want to answer in principle because they challenge his identity.  

He’s supposed to be the ruthless tough guy who’s completely hardened and doesn’t care about anyone else. It’s how he dealt with his trauma and also how he’s survived the outbreak practically speaking.  So if he is feeling something that challenges his identity, of course he’s going to resist or avoid acknowledging it to himself (and by extension to anyone else).   He doesn’t want to think about it. 

He’s Mr. super-dominant, the most dominant guy you’ll ever meet.   These are “why” questions, so they involve feelings.  If he paused to introspect and talk about his feelings, he just wouldn’t be him.  To him it would also feel like he’s agreeing that he has to “answer to someone”  (you didn’t say that, but he hears that underneath).  The idea of him answering to anyone challenges another part of his identity and threatens his ego.  

The automatic responses going through his head are the result of years of being this persona for survival— these thoughts are probably like, “so what if I did,” “I do what I want,” “if i didn’t i should’ve.”  But those are his thoughts which are now, at least to some degree, at odds with his feelings.  This is confusing and frustrating to him.  You asked what you thought was an easy question, but it brings up all kinds of other questions for him under the surface, ones he probably can’t even articulate. 

As for why she didn’t make him come (he didn't let her), he wasn’t interested.  He realizes why — he said it in Raider:Company  while he was fucking you. He said no one else could compare.  That was him saying it on his own terms in his own way while he was in complete control, in a position of absolute dominance.  In that context, on a conscious level, the sentiment is sexual to him, unburdened by other implications.  But to say it outside of the sexual context, outside of the heat of the moment, takes on a whole new level of meaning. It would be like acknowledging to himself that he has something huge to lose if he loses you. After outbreak day, he never wanted to be in that position again, to experience such a loss.  

So basically, they aren’t easy questions for him.  They're like existential questions. When he snaps at you, he’s projecting. Why he did, why he didn’t - these are questions he doesn’t want to face himself.  The conversation is legitimately overwhelming to him.

But he cares, and he shows you in other ways. The house meeting, you getting sick (see hypotheticals section on master list), that's all after this conversation.

#raider!joel #raider!ask #🖤 #raider!joel miller #raider!analysis

[t1bb1zoey]

Okay, I have screamed, squealed, hyperventilated, and smiled like a dork over this all damn day (I am by no means exaggerating).

Let's analyze this tasty ass chapter Old Xian, the fuckin legend he is, gave us on this holy day 🙌 😍

FIRST OF ALL

Bruh, they were MAKING OUT. You can even see in the other panels, Mo's lips are red and kind of puffy, so it makes you wonder how long they were going for before we popped back in again (I'm seriously going to try not to squeal all the way through writing this). The last chapter people were confused on whether it was a kiss on the lips or not. I still hold firm that it was.

NOW, LET'S LOOK AT THAT DANG KISS:

I think something very important happened here, aside from the actual physical kiss. Mo was able to, in the best way he could, articulate that he has feelings for He Tian, and He Tian also articulated in his way that he does not want to dominate or control Mo, like maybe he had in the past.

In the last chapter, He Tian knelt a little so he was not looming over Mo. I think this is important and was the first step in what He Tian was trying to do here in this interaction. Kneeling to someone's eye level means you are putting yourself on equal levels. You are taking this person seriously and you are doing your best not to be threatening or overbearing in any way.

After the first kiss that went wrong, He Tian has been controlling himself like crazy. He's still devilish at times, but flicking Mo's butt or kissing him on the cheek is not as aggressive as other things he did in the past (groping, shoving his tongue down Mo's throat, dragging an unwilling Mo places). He's backed off, and he backed off even more after learning that Mo's anxiety stems from She Li attacking, controlling, and dominating him. He Tian also learned that Mo's financial situation is no small thing and he has gained perspective into Mo's life and needs. In other words, He Tian has matured and has worked on himself so he could be someone Mo would love.

So, of course Mo loves him back now and kisses him. We pick up with both of them processing that kiss here:

So, remember, Mo knew that he was dragging He Tian to his room because he was overwhelmed with feelings and wanted to kiss him finally, but He Tian had NO IDEA what was happening until he was standing in front of Mo, so he's processing this as much as Mo is. And the way they process is so different.

I love that Mo begins trying to explain himself, but also cannot bring himself to say that he loves He Tian directly (yes LOVE, not like). He says that his mom also doesn't dislike him, the most roundabout way he could say "I like you" (but we all know he LOVES him, right?). And he continues to talk really fast and look away from He Tian, because I think for whatever reason, he's scared to see how He Tian is reacting (because Mo is insecure) and also simply because he's embarassed of course.

And how is He Tian reacting? In that panel where Mo is just word-vomiting at him, he's studying Mo. His face is calm, like he's trying to get a read on what Mo's motivations for kissing him are. He's also reluctant to let Mo go. He even continues to hold his hand when Mo goes to take the ear piercing kit from the drawer.

I think He Tian is probably feeling a combination of "Does he think this is what he has to do to repay me?" and also a bit of "please let this be real". So he makes Mo look at him, because the ear piercing kit probably sent some worry through him. He knows Mo has been preyed upon by She Li before, so He Tian is making sure Mo knows he's not the same as She Li. Remember, this was He Tian a couple hours, terrified Mo was going to reject him for being the same as She Li, and a few minutes ago, replaying what he did and feeling like he's bought into his father's violent world:

He's still carrying that with him here, the terror that Mo saw what he did and the inner-conflict about being a part of She Li and his father's dark world. In this moment, he doesn't want Mo to think he's another violent person who Mo needs to serve or placate. He explicitly says to Mo: "You're the one who saved me."

AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

It could be literal, when Mo came up behind She Li and whacked him in the head to get him off He Tian.

OR, it very likely means Mo made He Tian change for the better. He's not the same guy who forced a kiss on Mo, or who tried to control him, or who threw money at him to get Mo to do what he wanted. He's changed into someone who wants to work hard, who wants to protect goodness, who wants to be gentle and kind like Mo is. Mo did save him. He can be someone different from his father, his brother, and She Li if Mo is there to remind him how to be.

So he reminds Mo of this because he wants Mo to know that he owes He Tian nothing. He doesn't have to pierce his ear for him to show that He Tian has any sort of ownership or dominance or anything. I think He Tian missed the fact that Mo is having a rough time, even now, being direct.

For Mo, he's trying to remind He Tian of this

He's trying to say, indirectly, you can help me do this because, yes, I do like you back. But He Tian's caught up in making sure Mo's not feeling any obligation to him just because he took care of She Li. AND ISN'T THAT BOTH SO CUTE AND HILARIOUS?! 🤣

Mo's out here doing his best to let He Tian know he's ready to admit his feelings now, and He Tian's so worried for Mo that he needs to know FOR SURE this is something Mo actually wants. He has to see his face and he has to have some form of explicit confirmation before he can let himself accept what's happening. He could have just gone in for another kiss on his own, but he wouldn't do it. For He Tian, he does not want to "disgust" Mo ever again. It's full consent or nothing. So, after making it clear that Mo owes him nothing, he asks him outright, "tell me what you want".

And poor Mo's still having a hard time. He can't say the words quite yet, and that's okay. For Mo, I think actually asking for something he truly wants is quite difficult, because nothing goes well for him. Wanting anything is a dangerous game for him, so even just saying it out loud is like a jinx for him, like the universe will hear and He Tian will be taken away (and we do know he will be and I don't know how Mo's going to handle that). So he just points. It's the best he can do. He Tian's just gonna have to accept that.

And the SECOND he gets the confirmation he needed, He Tian kisses Mo again. IMAGINE WHAT THAT WOULD FEEL LIKE?! The person you've been blood-sweat-and-tears-ing for tells you they want you back??! He Tian's ear blushes in that panel where Mo points to him, because NOW it hits him that yes, this is real. The boy of his dreams actually wants him back!

And it's the gentlest kiss ever. It's so sweet and heartfelt. I'm really proud of He Tian's and Mo's character development. I would say He Tian has evolved more than Mo, just because we see that he's learned his lesson here fully and Mo is still fighting to voice his wants, but man both characters have come so far.

And He Tian says he'll give Mo anything. Anything. Mo's out here trying to give He Tian things (literal soup, a place to stay, piercing his ear), and He Tian turns around and says NO, YOU OWE ME NOTHING AND I WILL GIVE YOU ANYTHING. He Tian was going to straight up murder She Li for Mo. He was going to KILL someone.

I saw someone on here say that in the English language, we have no equivalent to what He Tian said here. He basically told Mo anything he was, is, and ever will be, anything he can get his hands on for Mo, anything he can do for Mo, for all time, forever and ever, is Mo's. He exists for Mo now.

LIKE???

I'M SORRY, WHAT???

Guys, they are married. All these rings and earrings and shit. Like, this is the vow that accompanies them.

I just ... I can't?

Wonderful and BRAVE chapter from Old Xian. I will NEVER get over it.

#19 days #old xian #he tian #tianshan #19days #mo guan shan #tianshancontent #she li

[borzoilover69]

I would like you to elaborate on dirk and Dave's relationship post game! 0u0

I want to make one thing clear. Neither of them are particularly bad people for reacting the way they do. They are products of their environments and their upbringings, and this reflects a LOT in their behaviour. This is my personal interpretation.

I think it starts off generally well. They have enough in common to talk a lot, and so much to catch up on! I’d imagine they chat for quite a while and build up raport.. and then as time goes on, they start to sort of get on each others nerves.

Dirk has a habit of over analysing and trying to get into peoples minds to further understand them. This isnt a bad thing, i think he genuinely does it out of wanting to understand and “vibe” with them better, but it may seem weird and unncessary for others. What with being isolated socially for so long, the alpha kids in general have some strange ways of saying things that seem perfectly normal to them, as well as interpretation, that strike others as off or strange, and dirk is no exception. They arent as handy with social cues.

This is important because well, while Dave is good at running his mouth, he struggles to articulate effectively when he cares. Im sure as we have seen in canon, especially with people he loves, Dirk will probably try to look too deep into it and reach a conclusion that isnt the best. Dirk needs people he cares about to communicate honestly and openly. This is something Dave will struggle to do due to his aforementioned inability to articulate when he cares the most.

Of course I cannot forget mentioning the abuse in the relationship Dave had with his bro. One that on reflection of his childhood later, led to him being incredibly uncomfortable with when he realised the way he was brought up was certainly not normal. It did not help qualm Daves nerves. Especially when Dirk said he could see himself doing that. Dave is compassionate, but he is not entirely forgiving. I feel that while Dirk thinks its best to be aware of this manner, it would just make Dave uncomfortable at the idea of repetition. One which i feel he could not voice.

Diving deeper into personal musings, considering some of the evidence that Dirk coveted Dave for a long time, Given how much we see him covet Dave it has a very high chance of flipping the other way as a natural prince of heart destroying and picking at himself. Dirk has a desire to be useful, a desire to succeed, and his accomplishments fail in the face of daves in both timelines.

Dirk has two people we are established he holds especially dear to him, and that is Dave and Jake. However with that level of attachment and endearment it can become unhealthy. Dave and Jake arent the best when it comes to communication, or establishing the most stable of relationships if canon is to go off of. Without proper care and communication this turns out bad.

I personally feel like as time would go along, the silence between them would grow longer due to the lack of communication of issues between them. Dave would rather skirt them, Dirk would rather bottle them until he eventually explodes. Its that or theyd have a codependent relationship for a while before cutting it all off out of a want to fix things by trying to be there for the other, but facing difficulty in their desires being too different, Dave wanting time to build up raport and slowly close that gap while Dirk just wants to get there as efficiently as possible and missing the point of the picture.

TLDR; If you put a kid through literal isolation for 16 years and give him a meager amount of social situations its going to be very difficult for them to aclimate to someone more accustomed to the ebb and flow of relationships. If you give an abuse victim a younger alternate version of their abuser theyre never going to be ok with it entirely.

Its 3 am ill prolly delete this later

#borzoi talks #asks #dirk strider #dave strider #homestuck #hom3stuck #borzoi meta #homestuck meta

[saintsenara]

I don't know if you are still doing the ship game. What do you think about Drarry? I apologise if you have already answered it- I tried to see if someone else has asked but I may have missed your response. It's a very popular ship and there are lots of well written fics by incredibly talented authors that I have enjoyed. But when I take that aside and look at the pairing just on its own, I struggle to articulate my thoughts on what I actually think about the pairing.

thank you for the ask @sarafina-sincerity!

i do read drarry, but i think it’s probably fair to say that i don’t read drarry because i expect it to make sense.

i like it fluffy and stupid, to be enjoyed after a hard day at work when i want something which is crammed full of fuck-buddies-to-oh-wait-this-is-serious tropes which doesn’t require too much effort to engage with.

and so the fics i tend to read aren’t drarry which really grapples with exactly how difficult it can be to make harry and draco work as a stable couple while still feeling true to their canon characters. [they’re not fics which dive into how they would be as an unstable couple either, which is - frankly - because i prefer to see harry in toxic messes with other people.] i like a bit of of out-of-character nonsense - i love to tune into a fic in which draco is assertive and witty and sophisticated (even though in the books he’s an insecure little bitch whose jokes always flop) or in which harry is passive, preternaturally adoring, and speaks like a therapist (even though in the books he’s a reckless feral cat with the emotional awareness of cardboard) or in which ron and hermione come around to it really quickly. i think they’re fun!

but arguing that drarry could make sense as a happy relationship when the characters are as they are in canon is difficult. indeed, i think that it’s even more difficult than making many of the completely implausible-sounding harry-centric pairings work (and, indeed, draco-centric pairings, taco nation rise up). and i think it’s worth dissecting why.

the first reason is that, much as umbridge is often the villain that readers have the most visceral reaction to (and much as the thing about snape which seems to most upset readers is when he’s a bad teacher), the fact that draco is just some guy at school actually makes the pairing harder. unlike something like snarry, in which a semi-mystical connection between the two is set up by the narrative, or tomarry, in which an overtly mystical connection is, drarry is just two lads who don’t really get on.

indeed, despite a tendency to explain their vibe in the books as sexual tension, harry gives no indication of particularly caring either way about draco while they’re at school. he thinks he’s annoying, pretentious, rude, and cowardly, but - outside of half-blood prince - he is not ever actually shown to escalate those feelings into being particularly obsessed with him. harry doesn’t watch draco constantly or follow him around or devote a huge amount of time to thinking about him when they’re not together of his own accord; and when he does do any of these things, it’s usually because draco has provoked him into it by seeking him out and/or being explicitly bigoted. even in half-blood prince, harry’s obsession with draco is external to the man himself - it’s rooted in his attempts to block out his grief over sirius, his anger at the death eaters who killed his godfather (lucius malfoy among them), his suspicion of snape, and the things he is learning about tom riddle.

draco, though, is obsessed with him. harry spends seven years living rent free in his head; he tracks his movements, he can barely make it through the day without seeking him out to try and get some attention from him, he clearly talks about him all the time (he needs no prompting from ‘crabbe’ and ‘goyle’ to bring him up during the polyjuice scene in chamber of secrets). he also obviously does have some level of respect for harry - he acknowledges, even if it’s through complaining to his father, that he’s a good quidditch player, for example - and, by the end of the series, he clearly does regard harry as brave. whereas, when it comes to more positive emotions, harry pities draco, but he never seems to like or admire him.

as a result, i always prefer drarry in which draco is the more feral one, but the default dynamic seems to have harry chasing him, rather than the other way round. i would also like to see more authors work with how likely draco would be to put up for long with having such an obvious interest in a man who is only ever likely to be ambivalent towards him in return

[and also a man who is quite likely to expect to become his partner’s priority, rather than the other way round. one issue with a lot of harry’s relationships, whether his canonical one with ginny or a fanon alternative, is that the role he occupies in the story means that he tends to relate to people he knows not as equals but either as people he needs to protect or people he needs to protect others from. in a relationship with draco, he is likely to pivot from the latter to the former, and i can’t imagine that draco - who thinks of himself as a protector as well, especially in his relationship with his mother - is going to particularly enjoy this. this is why i like middle-aged, have had decades to calm down, widowed or divorced drarry - it feels like it has more chance of being equal than the school-age or immediately post-war stuff.]

harry’s indifference-bordering-on-dislike towards draco does stand in contrast to how he thinks about other male characters that he’s frequently paired with. to return to snarry and tomarry - harry is shown to admire snape at numerous points prior to the end of half-blood prince, his interest in the prince’s textbook reveals that he and snape have a shared intellectual compatibility, and - above all - harry understands and empathises with snape’s background and experiences. similarly, harry is shown to admire voldemort at numerous points, the narrative sets them up as being very similar, and - above all - harry understands and empathises with voldemort’s background and experiences.

[harry is also obviously physically attracted to tom riddle, while draco is not - although this is, of course, not an insurmountable issue - obviously his type. the men harry finds attractive in canon are all tall, thin, and dark-haired, and draco is always described by the narrative in terms which suggest that harry thinks he’s ugly. the same is true for lucius malfoy.]

and i think that one explanation for the above is that a lack of shared background is one of the major stumbling blocks to drarry which doesn’t exist in the other two pairings. i love an auror partners trope-fic as much as any other girl, but - in reality - draco never needs to work and never gives the impression of being career-minded or finding career ambition valuable. harry is certainly rich enough not to need to work - and the fact that he has a pureblood name and resembles his pureblood father gives him an amount of class protection in the wizarding world which means that drarry is nowhere near as socially unequal as something like dramione - but he evidently finds the idea of working valuable, not least because he wants to achieve recognition for something other than being the boy-who-lived.

but draco - who likes being thought special on the basis of unearned things like his family name - would struggle to understand this. and, in return, harry would struggle to understand how draco’s adult life - something i suspect he would see as one of tedious luxury - is driven by a sense of duty to his family and his peers. after all, harry believes in the value of found family and earned loyalty, and loathes any expectation that he should be deferential to people just because of who they are.

of course, i don’t think this would prevent them being together. it would just cause a tension which would either see everything crash and burn (hot) or which would require growth from both characters which takes a certain lightness of touch to pull off. there are lots of drarry authors who do one or both of these in their works, of course. but those authors are very rarely trying to portray harry and draco as (to begin with, at least) a good or healthy couple…

but with this said, i also think that some common criticisms of drarry wouldn’t actually be a big deal to either harry or draco.

the most significant of these is the fact that harry is morally righteous - yes - but that this manifests itself in an expectation of loyalty from other people, but not an expectation of purity. in post-war drarry, i think it’s entirely reasonable to say that harry’s belief that the malfoys turned against voldemort because of loyalty to each other (something he finds valuable, and clearly considers to be the appropriate way for a family unit to behave - look at what he thinks of percy weasley, for example), as well as lucius malfoy’s extra-canonical willingness to help harry and the ministry by informing on all his former associates (which, according to jkr, results in him being spared azkaban and harry thinking that’s fine) enables him to let go of draco’s past, and to have a relationship without the weight of that history hanging over them. i don’t think he ever becomes fond of lucius - although i think he is likely to feel slightly more warmth towards narcissa - but i also don’t think he would expect draco to estrange himself from his family or completely change as a person in order to consider him worthy of his affection.

[this is, for what it’s worth, something which makes dramione an impossibility for me - even if draco is capable of redemption (which, like everyone, he is), i don’t think she’s ever forgiving him or considering him changed enough to be worthy of her, and i don’t think she should have to.]

draco may not, however, consider this acceptance as much of a gift as harry might. above all because i believe sincerely that harry would never feel bad about the sectumsempra incident. draco is clearly someone who holds grudges, and i think that this would always be in quite profound tension with harry’s remarkable (but also entirely self-interested) ability to decide he’s going to let things go.

i also think that harry is going to be able to handle draco’s more negative characteristics better than he’s sometimes given credit for, since all of them - especially his tendency towards jealousy, self-aggrandisement, and moping - are things he shares with ron. and, like ron, i think draco is going to be surprisingly good at dealing with harry’s impulsivity, his tendency to brood, and tendency to form knee-jerk judgements. these seemingly opposing personality traits are actually quite nicely balanced.

and, of course, the big one: love is strange and unpredictable; forgiveness can be easy just as often as it can be difficult; everyone is capable of redemption; people can choose to be together despite significant odds against them; choice is much more interesting than fate; and fluffy drarry is unbelievably entertaining.

my final statement, though? people are sleeping on dron. ron and draco have all the right ingredients - above all, the fact that they’re narrative mirrors - which makes things like snack bang. the potential for drama and intrigue and destabilising love is right there. harry simply cannot compete.

#asks answered #asenora's opinions on ships #drarry #harry potter #draco malfoy

[scoobydoodean]

Given the actual reality that Jake Tally, won, and killed Sam would Jake have had to had drink all that blood too? Like was the winner just going to end up with Ruby keeping them on goal or was that specific for Sam?

Like did Dean being his cheat code bringing him back to life make him a weaker vessel and the blood was there to build him back up?

Context

Sam the intended vessel (because of the narrative symmetry of brothers at odds) but a physically inferior vessel because he didn’t actually complete the proper steps in season 2 interesting and sensible 👀👀👀 huehehehehe

In all seriousness though, they never tell us any hint of a reason for this difference between the “perfect vessels”. It feels like the only reason this was written into 5.22 was to create a broken parallel with 4.22 when Sam, alone and absent hope, drinks the nurse believing it’s too late to turn back. In 5.22, Dean, Cas, and Bobby help him, in a plan that isn’t about Sam’s ego and in a situation built upon mutual trust instead of dishonesty.

I’m not sure how to fully articulate my thoughts about the inclusion of the blood drinking yet other than that… it honestly feels a little forced from the lore end? Shoehorned in to serve the purpose of signaling moral convergence among Team Free Will. (By showing all of TFW lending a hand). I think Bobby making a deal with Crowley and Dean’s attraction to Crowley in 5.20 were perhaps better illustrated examples of that moral convergence. 5.20 is fun and kind of funny in that Sam has overcorrected after season 4 toward an initial unwillingness to consort with demons at all, while Dean probably feels (and has been feeling arguably since at least 4.10 and then continuing with the despair of 5.10-5.18) an opposite pressure.

There’s a longer post on this in my head somewhere… but by 5.21/5.22, Sam has converged as far as he’s able toward unity and humility, Cas toward faith in his friends despite their lack of power, and Dean toward… a necessary level of ruthlessness and of course, acceptance that Sam is choosing to sacrifice himself, and him dying doesn’t make Dean guilty of any kind of personal failing. The return of demon blood drinking (now no longer a means of feeling better than everyone else for Sam) helps illustrate some of these themes.

#mail #pk rewatches spn number ? #5.20 #5.21 #5.22 #season 5 #4.22

[answer2jeff]

the fatherhood theory:

my take on lip gallagher finding purpose in parenthood.

First things first, I quickly want to congratulate the writers for beautifully articulating the accuracy of Lip's initial reaction to Freddy's birth.

Tami had an extremely complicated birth that resulted in her requiring surgery. Lip, both as a new father and as a boyfriend, was legitimately terrified. He couldn't decide if he should stay with Tami or their son. His thought process probably included the possibility of the mother of his child suffering, further trailing to the fear of fatherly absence. Naturally, considering Lip's lack of a genuine father figure, contributing anything remotely resembling neglect or failure to accommodate to his son feels like the worst and most unforgivable thing he could ever do.

Secondly, I want to say that although Tami is quite different compared to Lip's other love interests, I think she was relatively realistic at the time. She has drive and compassion, and Lip loves a good sarcastic girl who affectionately ridicules the guy she loves. She's abrasive in a way that is more meant to establish her intelligence rather than actually put others around her down. Tami is also terrible at accepting criticism, but doesn't respond in the explosive anger that Lip does. She's more passive aggressive than, well...aggressive aggressive. Even though it's not quite the healthiest, it's much more flexible than rage.

In short, Lip sees a lot of himself in Tami. But, she's a more put together, determined version of him. She's the star that Lip never really turned out to be, even if she's not absolutely perfect. Their relationship is accurate for the conditions of the show (and Lip's life.) Tami doesn't give Lip a lot of opportunities to self sabotage because she's pretty much dubbed herself the lead of their relationship.

(not ignoring the fact that she said he'd be a shitty father by the way. that crushed my soul and i'll never forgive her but that's besides the point.)

Having to decide to let professionals (doctors and nurses, who he notoriously does not trust (rooted by capitalistic healthcare environments and the need for independence due to his childhood trauma), try their best to help Tami when she was literally blue and unresponsive, was difficult and extremely scary.

However, once Freddy has been properly cleaned and prepared to be held by his father, Lip suddenly finds the answer to so many of his interpersonal questions.

"I seem to have ruined everything I was once good at. Is there anything I won't automatically ruin just because I don't think I deserve it?"

Fatherhood.

"Would I be any better at this than my parents were?"

Yes, with practice.

"Would I be able to break the cycle?"

Yes, with love.

"Is it necessary for me to feel so deeply about the world?

Yes. Even if it's painful.

"And was it ever worth hiding that with anger?"

To some extent, yes. You wanted to protect yourself.

"Am I, deep down, past my inevitable quickness to rage, a good person?"

Yes. You always have been.

In hindsight, his excitement for becoming a dad seems kind of obvious considering his overjoyed and emotional reaction. But I think we can dig deeper beyond this surface level impression. Even if it's genuine and ultimately very good at showing Lip's love for his son. Something that I think really prepared Lip for the complications of parenthood was the time period during his time as a college student taking care of Liam.

He'd been surrounded by family members for his entire life that he did not trust. When Fiona, his beacon of support throughout his whole childhoo despite their complicated sibling relationship, made such a grave mistake that reflected neglect, Lip felt unsafe. Both Frank and Monica were typical offenders of drug and alcohol abuse. And they regularly dabbled in allowing these substance issues to affect their children.

Now there was really nobody in his family he could trust. Lip would have to re-learn how to fend for himself and his family. He's had plenty of experience, but he had a support system. Even if it contained his own siblings who lived the same abusive life as he did. But now that he didn't trust anyone around Liam, he literally had to become his primary caregiver.

"You're the closest thing to a dad we've ever had," said Ian Gallagher.

Becoming Freddy's father was the love that Lip needed in his life. Girlfriends are replaceable. Lip has proven this. But he always believed that once you become a father, you do not have the right to back out. And he'd always hold himself to that standard.

This is your life now. Do it right, or go to hell.

People like Lip need to have people in their lives who unconditionally rely on them. His siblings have chosen many times (and rightfully of course) to handle personal matters without Lip's advice. He hasn't gotten to feel as needed or as important as he deserved to be. Having a child, though unexpected, was the missing piece to the endless puzzle that was his life's purpose.

Lip's desire to be a good father not only stemmed from the failure of his own parents, but the fact that guiding his siblings through life was the one thing that everyone around him that everyone was convinced he couldn't do better than anyone else. (Personally, I think Fiona did a great job as an older sister. I'm more speaking from the perspectives and opinions of his siblings.)

Lip will feel love for himself through Teddy. Once he can finally succeed for the long term, he will find peace.

Not to say that he's automatically perfect, because he's not (and no one else is), but he's ready to take on the challange.

Freddy is the love of Lip's life.

And he always will be.

#lip gallagher #dad!lip #jeremy allen white #shameless #freddy gallagher #tami tamietti #shamless us #fiona gallagher #ian gallagher #the gallaghers #the fatherhood theory #i love him your honor #he's gonna be a great dad #i'm so proud of him AND tami.

[iguessitsjustme]

I have not been able to stop thinking about this since episode 9 aired and I read an excellent insight into Pat’s character this morning by @wen-kexing-apologist so I wanted to talk about Jeng because he is the character that I relate to the most. Granted, I am not a high level manager in my parent’s successful company, BUT I’ve worked office jobs and I’ve been in management positions and overseeing people. Please keep in mind that I am approaching Jeng as a white queer person who was raised (all over) the United States so I can only truly add the perspective that gives me. Also I wrote this while bored at work so I was definitely not nearly as articulate as I like, and this might not be anyone else’s interpretation and I completely understand if you do not agree with me here. With that said, here we go:

I am probably the most cishet passing person in the world. There’s no particular reason for this other than it’s just the way I am and how I like to present. I don’t risk my safety by presenting queer, I just don’t. I live in a big city, my family is incredibly supportive, my friends are queer, a good number of my coworkers are queer, I am not closeted. But people see me and they assume that I am straight. For the purposes of this post I'm focusing on sexual orientation rather than gender what I’m focusing on because my relationship with gender right now is basically the shrug emoji. Despite being out as bi since I was 24 many years ago, I still find myself constantly coming out to people because if I say nothing, assumptions are made about me and those assumptions are based on a heteronormative worldview that society has cursed us all to and those assumptions about me are wrong. 

Now let’s look at Jeng. I’m not gonna mention Pat because I fully believe that Pat’s response to learning Jeng is attracted to men was entirely based on his own repressed feelings and not entirely an assumption that Jeng is straight. Jeng passes as straight. I’m sure that’s due to a combination of his position, his family, and just his overall personality. We know that Jeng is out to people. He talks to his friend about Pat, Jaab asks him about his feelings towards Pat, and when he brings Pat home, Jeng’s parents see Pat and make some assumptions about what occurred. So a significant number of people in Jeng’s life know that he is gay and it’s not only a significant number that know but the people closest to him know as well. The other people that are able to clock Jeng in this show are the other queer people. Chot and Jen just know. They see how he looks at and interacts with Pat and can see the humongous crush that Jeng is nursing. So Jeng is working under the assumption that around these people, he is out. He might present straight and he might keep that up for work purposes, but he believes himself to be out to at least the other queer people near him.

Then Pat says this:

And Jeng breaks. And I get that. Jeng knows that Pat is gay, Jeng thought that Pat knew he was gay. Jeng thought they were on the same page. Other queer people in Jeng’s life have known he was gay without him needing to explicitly state that. Pat, the person Jeng has been flirting with and has confessed to (while he was so drunk he couldn’t understand Jeng you beloved idiot) had no clue. At least that’s how it appears to Jeng, who is now in the unfortunate position of needing to out himself. Let me tell you something, it is exhausting to have to constantly come out to people. Every new person that I meet, if I want them to know that I am queer, I need to explicitly tell them because if I don’t, they will never know. I’ve had people think that I’m just a really good ally before. There are times I wish I was so entirely and visibly queer that no one would ever doubt it, and I’m sure Jeng felt that in this moment with Pat. It just takes one look at his face during this scene to know that Jeng has been here before and he is tired and his heart is breaking.

How many people do you think Jeng has had to make a choice between outing himself or letting them work with false assumptions regarding his sexuality? How many times has Jeng chosen to closet himself instead of being who he is? How many times has Jeng been interested in another man but had no chance because that person didn’t know or care to believe he is gay? Just needing to make the decision on whether or not to explicitly say, “Yes, I like men” or “I’m gay” is tiring in and of itself, but then the actual saying of the words? Depleting. Especially to someone who you thought already knew. It hurts when people think I’m just a really good ally. I can’t imagine the pain Jeng felt at Pat’s surprise because to Jeng, that surprise indicated that Pat saw him as a good ally (again, I do not think that’s what was going on with Pat but this is about Jeng and his interpretation) and not as someone with interest in him.

Then Jeng learns later on that Pat just doesn’t understand how someone like Jeng can like him. It doesn’t make sense to Pat. How many times has Jeng been made to feel like his sexuality, coming from him, doesn’t make sense? I’m sure his dad had some things to say about it. I’m sure part of the reason he left previously was due to that. So while Jeng is out, it is a constant coming out process and then an entire new process to get people to believe it. Jeng’s sadness is mostly about Pat rejecting him, but I’m sure at least a small part of it is also the tiny piece of him that was so sure that Pat at least knew he was gay.

Jeng now believes that Pat has only ever seen him as his straight boss and that can’t change. Pat sees him as a coworker, not even a friend, not even a member of the queer community. Just a coworker and nothing more. The revelation that Jeng likes and is attracted to men, made Pat uncomfortable. Is it because Jeng doesn’t obviously present as gay? Is it because he isn’t as clockable as someone like Chot? Now Jeng has to think of not only all of his interactions with Pat, but also all of his interactions with the other queer people in his office. Does he have to come out to them too or do they already know like he thought they did? Jeng was so busy being the most smitten man in the universe, it didn’t occur to him that his giant, massive, all-consuming crush on Pat might not have been obvious. I’m guessing the straight people in his office have been working under the assumption that he is straight. Will he need to come out to them too? He has been handling this for who knows how long, but this time, this time it HURTS.

Jeng was so worried about crossing the boundaries by being Pat’s boss that he didn’t even think about how dating a man would impact his worker’s perception of him. I don’t think he ultimately cares about what they think of his personal life or his personality as long as they are able to function as a department. But when Pat asked if he liked men, Jeng had to start reevaluating everything. Not just his interactions with Pat, but his interactions with the world. No wonder he seemed so just completely and utterly tired this episode. When Jeng and Pat finally work through their little miscommunication issues (which makes so much sense and work so well with this show I can’t even begin to describe my actual love for it which is weird cause miscommunication is my least favorite trope), I don’t think Jeng will actually change anything about the way he presents himself to the world. He still has his family to think about, and he’s still, well, he’s still Jeng. But I think this gave him some things to think about himself that he probably already knew but didn’t think he would have to explain to another queer person. Especially not Pat. Pat is out at the office, but it wasn’t entirely his choice. Pat outed himself so he would stop getting put in awkward conversations about the women in the office. Jeng might have seen something similar to himself in Pat. Pat could potentially pass as straight, and in fact did at the very beginning. He let people think he was dating a woman. Pat was careful who he came out to at the office. Jeng probably thought that of all people, Pat would understand him the best. Not explicitly out, but not in the closet either. How heartbreaking for both of them that their experiences clashed in such a way. But once those two get on the same page? They are gonna be the cutest couple in the entire world and I am so excited to see Jeng, finally, finally, be able to express his love for Pat to Pat as much as he wants to.

#step by step #step by step the series #step by step bl #yes i love jeng a whole lot #i also love pat a whole lot #i am very open to different interpretations here #because a lot of this was definitely informed by my own worldview and my own experiences #also please please go read that post about pat because it is so incredibly good and much more thought out and put together than my rambling #i read it this morning before i went to work and it was such a brilliant start to my day

[longeyelashedtragedy]

Frank James Lampard OBE 👀

ougughgh, you whipped out the order of the british empire? 🫡 😳 maybe i was wrong to judge them teaboos back in the superwholock days (that's a JOKE)

@protect-daniel-james i'll respond here but i might use your ask to post some more Photos cause i'm not sure how to pick just one photo of the Long Eyelashed Tragedy

favorite thing about them: uhhh...so much? he gets me right in the FEELS, man. he tells on himself constantly and seems to be completely unaware. sadboi footballer with pretty dead eyes who loves to Read and took a little notebook with him on the team bus. the intersection of having it easy/privileged childhood & traumatic things that shouldn't have happened--i relate. exhilarating to watch his old performances and he seems like he'd be fun to have a conversation with. fascinating to analyze, this all feels sort of reductive...i'm very Fond of him and some of it is hard to put into words, but i feel very "what's not to love?" about him lol. and he has such a Narrative. he's very easy to write about though it probably doesn't turn out well at all (sounds great and deep in my head though)

also i find a lot of footballers hot but don't really experience significant attraction to them but he is an exception you know what i'm just going to end this here

least favorite thing about them: he lost weight after everton BOO HISS

favorite line: omg, frank james lampard OBE is funny because he's often so intelligent and articulate and then just whips out the WEIRDEST/most cringe thing out of nowhere. some examples:

-his "fight" with klopp on the touchline

THIS wtfery:

these BANGERS:

this classic example of childhood trauma "too old when you're young and too young when you're old" (what some ppl would call "entitled male athlete" but like..i know better than that lol). it's also just patently RIDICULOUS he was like 36...bolding is mine for the classic lines

But it was while on a night out in Manchester during pre-season that the ex-West Hamer star showed his new American team-mates exactly how ex-Premier League stars like to party.

Columbus Crew centre-back Josh Williams was with NYCFC at the time and he told the story to the Athletic.

...“This place is packed, multiple levels. And as soon as we walk in, you could see everybody recognise Frank. And it’s just me, my teammate and Frank and all the energy is just on him.

"He picks up a bottle, this huge bottle of Grey Goose, picks it up, opens it, just starts downing it. Passes it to me and goes, ‘Boys, we’re not putting this down until it’s fucking gone.’”

The trio passed the bottle around three times when the rest of NYCFC showed up.

After about an hour in the club, Lampard approached Williams and asked him about 'that game you Americans play where you throw the little balls — he’s talking about beer pong.'

ok let's see...

brotp: random one but i recently learned that he and ian wright are friends? and i just love that so much both as a gooner and a person. wrighty complements him well and is very...respectful lol. if we consider lamperry to be only one-sided romantic, then definitely lamperry

notp: franko x steven gerrard...there's only One situation in which i've enjoyed that ship (and it was an au). it does nothing for me normally, and i personally don't find stevie g attractive, so! again, it's like an "ew get it away from me" notp, it's just not my vibe.

otp: i mean...lamperry requited. franko x cousin jamie jamie jamie ....maybe someday they can give romeo and juliet their happy ending. and of course, frank and mason...i just really like this ship so much and it keeps my brain so entertained...even though it's not "healthy" and doesn't end well. these ships are all SO good!!!

random headcanon: oh gosh idk...i don't think i have any "headcanons" because everything he says and does in public just kind of tracks. bet he's done coke lol. idk

unpopular opinion: HOO BOY!!! here we go!!! i am aware that i have a wooby nature, but i actually like that about myself. i'd rather approach someone--anyone with softness and then tone it down when i decide they're a dick, than be uncharitable for no reason. that's my way and that's how it's gonna be! so that said...franko gets accusations of "arrogance" and i...i don't see it at all. it might come from his disingenous press conferences at chelsea and everton, but i see that as a man who has horrid self-esteem, was used to being treated by media and fans like a Starboy, and once he started doing badly, had no idea how to handle professional failure--not one single idea. remember on "diary of a ceo" over the summer when he said his first chelsea sacking was the first time he's ever failed professionally? that's insane. Like, imagine making it to age FORTY-TWO and not having a legitimate school or career disaster. that's insane to me. so he just put up a front and got cranky and defensive and funky about where he placed the blame (and to be honest--he has not done a good job as a manager, but he also wound up in some pretty dismal positions. taking chelsea caretaker manager was really shooting himself in the foot because that season just needed to be put out of its misery lol). i'm not saying he's a bastion of humility, or some misunderstood coaching genius, but i don't see him as any more or less arrogant than someone else. idk--i see a weird level of contempt for him that doesn't really feel deserved? he's just a sad sack. sort of a hubris tale in a sense, but also a tale of a man who is still stuck as a kid in some ways...i need to stop before i write a really bad dissertation lol

uh that said...

song i associate with them:

finally a footballer i can give a good answer to this for!!!

name me a better combination than me x lamps x pink floyd x this summer! comfortably numb, shine on you crazy diamond (all of it, but particularly sections vi-ix), wish you were here...

(i know this sounds basic...i know there are more i'm not remembering)

"money" in some ways because i listened to it while writing "visited upon the sons" (it hit me afterward that the fic and the song are structured in the same way...the chicken or the egg?)

from the oooold first days of the lampardverse:

behind blue eyes/a well respected man

also! wouldn't it be nice kind of reminds me of him and cousin jamie loool

favorite picture of them:

dude idk! i really love looking at photos of him! this is granit levels of difficulty...i Cannot choose so let's go with this sad sack from the blessed everton days:

#anonymous #answered #long eyelashed tragedy #!!!!! #i feel like i just lost 78784 followers lol

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 3x2 Thoughts

An episode for the ages! My favorite scene of s3 is still Ted’s press conference in 3x1 (plus there’s just something about an episode written by Leann Bowen that gets my right in the brain and right in the heart) but 3x2 was incredible and made me feel so excited about this show and the stories they’re telling and so excited that it feels like each character is going on a realistically new journey here in the final third of this arc. It’s kinda thrilling.

I already accidentally chatted about this episode with a bunch of people and honestly I’ll probably continue to lack the willpower to make this a truly “pure” reflection of my thoughts at the end of an episode. At the same time, this is my best effort to preserve and record my own feelings.

Rebecca’s backstory with Rupert is perfect. Timelines on this show continue to be a bit squishy and I’m okay with that. I love knowing that she was a bartender (I can see it! I can see her having this scattered relationship with her family and finding something she’s good at—albeit with a massive safety net—and I want to know allllll her opinions on cocktails and tending bar). I love the pain of her having been the other woman while Rupert was married to someone else—the knowledge that would have given her of what he was capable of (and the manipulation was so well-crafted that she was still surprised that he cheated on her, which I believe), but also the pain of having been so manipulated into believing Rupert genuinely saw something special in her, and how much that kind of attention followed by his present-day open revulsion (all performances) would fuck a person up. I particularly loved that she finally told Keeley about the origin of that relationship while watching Rupert manipulate Zava; Rebecca understands that Rupert’s power isn’t just something he wields to get sex from women, but a skill that impacts how he conducts himself professionally. If viewers watched that scene and the connection she’s drawing between all these different types of experiences and still don’t understand that Rupert is abusive, that’s on them.

I’ve been filtering through my thoughts on Rebecca knowing Rupert was married, and how that intersects with her experience finding her father cheating. In a lot of ways, I think Deborah is the key to all of this. Even if Rebecca didn’t confront her mother, she tried to, and her mother shut it down to the point of giving her still very young daughter the silent treatment for months while she was away at university. Even though it wasn’t Deborah’s fault that she was getting cheated on any more than it was Rebecca’s fault that Rupert manipulated her or that Rupert cheated on her too, I think Deborah’s refusal to go there with her daughter had an incredibly toxic impact on Rebecca’s sense of self-worth. I think she probably felt very unspecial, very alone—even with friends and a job and who knows what other relationships—and even if she didn’t, even if she felt fine, suddenly she couldn’t imagine life without Rupert making her feel special. It’s tragic and messy and I think it’s a really good character choice for Rebecca to have had the level of knowledge she had. It also mirrors the knowledge someone like Nathan has, deep down, about the good and bad in people, while he very understandably makes this choice to align himself with West Ham and with Rupert even as Rupert is throwing away his car and making choices for him and twisting him into thinking that’s respect.

This was such an incredible Roy episode. I find it interesting and really wonderful that Rebecca’s been aware of the breakup for days or weeks (and Higgins, too, unless Keeley didn’t tell him why she needed to sob into his clean shirt) and didn’t tell any of Roy’s colleagues even though these are all people in her world, too. Everyone else at the club tries their best—and Roy does end up needing some help and direction for articulating his feelings more—but they’re all really outward in their displays of sympathy. I really like that Rebecca, who went through probably the most nightmarish breakup on this show so far, is the one who’s most circumspect about it all.

There’s just so much. So much. Roy having held this grudge against Trent since he was seventeen, feelings deeply hurt by adjectives in a newspaper, then going on to embody at least some of those adjectives (but effectively! And with talent! But not always with intention!) for the rest of his career. It makes it so moving to think about Roy telling the team not to share anything with Trent. I like that Roy appears to have taken at face value Ted being over the article Trent posted about him; it feels like this may be yet another thing Roy has attempted and failed to process on his own, another difference between Roy and other people, where Roy carries around this old newspaper clip for decades but Ted has “healed” in a matter of months. (Not that all this was directly in the text of the show, but I think it’s really telling that the Trent thing is the source of the first true conflict between Ted and Roy where Ted ends up needing to very assertively provide Roy with some direction.) It’s all so intricate, all the different shower conversations, and Roy’s revelation about why maybe he shouldn’t have left Chelsea so hastily being something he needed to hear himself say (because of Keeley) and also something Ted needed to hear Roy say at this time of being very aware of what he’s left behind in Kansas and even more crucially aware that he’s got a decision to make about Richmond. Roy doesn’t know that Ted is questioning his value so profoundly, and it made everything that happened in that final scene so !!!!!!!! And Ted kind of plays it up, batting his eyelashes and talking about how lucky it is he and Roy met, and of course it’s both of their wild leaving-things-early decisions that got them to this place, and maybe Ted can start to see how good that is even if he’s still got a lot to sift through. And then he’s alone in the office and his face becomes this entirely different thing. <3 

(And I do like that Trent is there to witness a lot of that. I really enjoyed his role in this episode and I think I’ll enjoy the layer of storytelling and awareness he lends to the various football and feelings arcs this season. I think Trent is a fun character who brings out something interesting in basically everyone he interacts with. I’ve never been that compelled by him in a fannish way, though. He can be fun to think about, but I don’t really ship him with anyone and I don’t find the fanon around him very interesting. Is this the most shocking and divisive thing I’ve ever said in one of these! Maybe! It makes me very happy that so many people are Trent girlies [all gender]! I am just not one of them! But season 3 is making me care!)

Keeley is the Ted of PR! Ted is the Keeley of football! Ted almost faints when he finds out Roy and Keeley broke up! He’s there for both of them! He’s a good friend! And Keeley is having such a little Ted journey in the wild yet staid world of KJPR. I really like that it’s clear now that she didn’t hire that team; a larger firm has clearly made these placements. It makes me have lots of questions about the nature of the firm’s investments in her. Everything with Shandy was brilliant. I was chatting with a friend (hi @theodore-lasso) who pointed out that Keeley has possibly taken Rebecca’s “hire your best friend” advice a bit too literally. Yes, Shandy has industry knowledge, but Keeley might not be ready to simultaneously navigate insisting that Barbara treat everyone with respect while also setting boundaries with Shandy in that we cannot simply be expensing mimosas at work. I think it’s fascinating that Keeley has never once described her career shift as “getting out” and has never articulated—or even seemed to experience—any shame over topless modeling or any of her previous jobs, nor have Rebecca, Roy, Keeley, Nathan, Higgins, or anyone else in her life who she’s talked work with made any assumptions about that. (Ted covering up the photo in 1x1 feels adjacent to that kind of judgment, but to me it’s always felt like a judgment of Jamie Tartt’s judgment rather than a reflection on Keeley’s own judgment.) So it’s so fascinating to me that Shandy, a person doing the same work, is the first person to express that perspective. And Keeley just immediately gets her out. Immediately hires her. Seeing both the real goodness in that—it’s very Ted “I don’t wanna bench Roy because he’s going through a lot of emotions and he needs this” Lasso of her—and the ways she’s making things more complicated for herself is so fascinating. I’m here for it.

And Beard! Beard! Reduced largely to pitch-perfect, hilarious shrieks for this episode, he somehow still manages to be wonderful. And if I had fewer feelings about the look on Ted’s face when Beard matter-of-factly tells Ted he can’t pass along his hello to Jane because she still finds their relationship threatening…fewer feelings about that would mean I could say more. It hurts. So much. And yet I was so relieved to see that dynamic in Ted and Beard’s relationship because I think it makes it clear that either Ted really is going to need to become a “threat” to Jane (he’s already taken Rebecca’s feedback in terms of fighting back for her and for the team [“our team”...not over it], and he’s already made it clear that Roy needed to get over himself and deal with the Trent thing, so maybe he’s in his growing-vertebrae era. And even if we don’t ever see Ted interact with Jane, it could be just as satisfying for him to be honest with Beard about everything he’s observing. 

Side note: I loved the “hope you aren’t late” joke Ted is ready with as soon as he finds out Beard is going to a play about menstrual cycles. I love that the quickness between them almost never falters even when things are hard.

Side note: Ted’s Breakup Mix!

Side note: Higgins’ convoluted connections! The comedic rhythm he and Rebecca (and Keeley, when she’s around, and Ted, when he’s around) have this season is so good.

Side note: As someone who watched my first Hallmark movie specifically so I could write fic for the holiday exchange, Ted’s entire speech about Hallmark movies was so incredible and had me losing my entire mind. I think I literally had my hands clapped over my mouth. My wife was supportively laughing at me.

Not a side note but every feeling in the world: Many more people have observed this already, but the contrast between Rupert showing up to a bar every day and claiming he’s there without expectation just because it’s worth it to be near Rebecca vs. Ted showing up with the biscuits every day very much with a stated purpose—they can’t be good partners without getting to know each other well—makes my little Ted/Rebecca heart soar. It explains so much about why she was so resistant to the biscuit tradition at first, as well as the great significance of why she’s come to rely on it. 

There are a million other things. This episode was really rich and layered. I loved s1 for its perfection—its confidence bolting out of the gate and establishing a world I wanted to live in. I loved s2 for its pain and mess and soul. But so far s3 is really, really earning its place as an answer to both of those contrasting experiences, and I’m so excited for more. 

#ted lasso #meta by me #ted lasso meta #ted lasso s3 spoilers #ted lasso 3x2 #hot dork club

[sh0tanzz]

I’m extremely sad abt ot6 siren i feel like i just all hope for seunghan do you think he’s actually not gg to come back

I’m not sure. Lucas has returned despite how severe his allegations were (what happened with him happened before I was into kpop so I’m not fully in the loop I just know what was said) and the Haechan caught vaping in the practice video situation (all he got was having to pay a fine and probably a slap on the wrists+scolding) I assume there’s a chance of Hannie coming back but not for a while. his name/merch has been brought back to some markets so maybeee

On a spiritual level..I do transit checks on random people I think about and considering Seunghans situation I do a lot for him and recently his transits show that he’s been deeep in thought about his current situations and trying to find emotional balance or sense of it all..

he has Sun/Chiron transits hinting at him feeling unappreciated or insecure about himself and unsure about his duties.

Sun/Pluto he might have to make a serious choice or change for himself and having to “regenerate” after a period of loss

Sun/Saturn feeling like he’s being suppressed and hidden away (of course.) and that his expression has been limited and he can’t say/express what he wants

He also has Mars quincunx Sun which can mean with dealing with a clash or conflict with someone of authority telling him what to do and what not to do (I like to think the authority figure is SM, managers etc etc)

and a long term transit of Saturn sextile Chiron meaning he’s slowlyyy coming back to stability and feels has to work harder to make up for his mistakes and shortcomings

If he does come back (hopefully he does) I feel like there might be a strange caveat or to gain him we might have to lose something as a fandom or them as a group I’m not exactly sure yet but this is just how I articulate it for now

I just miss him sm yk

#sh0tanzz #kpop astrology #hong seunghan #riize astrology

[aboutdifferentthings]

Jess and Rory are no jerk and no failure and they got together.

I just read too many things about Jess being a jerk and about Rory being a failure that I could not take it anymore and I know I am late to the party but I was not sure I wanted to watch the revival or seasons four to seven. I have only been able to watch it because I saw a post with Jess looking Rory through a window and just thought, ey, they meet again, they are together. And here I am. I will just let it out. 

When we meet Jess in season two he is a seventeen years old, an adolescent no one believes in. No one. I love season two: Jess and Rory have all these beautiful moments and he makes me laugh so much, they both do. But if you listen carefully you understand what kind of life Jess has been having and how he feels about it.  I won’t defend every decision Jess made  but the conversation with Rory in the car is so meaningful: “Ask my mother, principal or even your mother who does not even know me” no one, absolutely no one expects anything from him.  The principal in school tells Luke he has no interest in the subjects, other students or anything else and if you think about it, it makes sense: he has grown up probably by himself, no one really took care of him so he found refuge in his books and sarcasm. He needs really loud music to sleep, probably not to hear whatever was going on at home. He is not good with the small talk because he is use to be by his own and once again: he is seventeen, can we not forget this? In fact I find he has quite a lot self control sometimes (specially in 2x05) but that would take too long to elaborate here. 

And Rory is just so sweet. The only one able to connect with him, and to realize the potential he has got. I love how she tries to fight against this general opinion against Jess, she is the  best. The problem with Rory is that she has been living in a bubble where she is perfection and she thinks she needs to keep it like that and this is really difficult to break. All these feelings she is having, she is constantly doubting them because no one is able to validate them. To tell her, ey, it is normal, tell me about Jess, why is he so interesting? Instead of that her mother and best friend is constantly acting like if she was going crazy  for becoming friends with him and risking his relationship with Dean (do not get me started with him…) From minute one, she is so unfair with them that it really hurts. Lorelai is really unbearable in relation to Jess).

It is just specially painful to see that even when they are wonderful together they drift apart because they both have issues they need to work on. They could have done it together but in order to do that they would have need some adult support and they do not have it (Jess not at all and Rory not in the way she needs it). And I do not want to be unfair with Luke, he is a good soul, he tries… Jess understands it years later but at that moment it does not feel like real support, and it is not. 

Jess gets lost and he hurts her deeply because she will never be able to find that level of connection again and she is so afraid of suffering again the same way that she would never go for it. 

When Jess comes back in season four he his still not ready. I could write an essay about how he is right in a lot of the things he says and feels but he does not know how to articulate them. Rory loves him, she does and she always will but she is still hurting. He does not apologize, he does not tell her why even feeling what he feels.  he did what he did. On both occasions he just drops the bomb and leaves ( I think second one happens mainly because Dean was there. He would probably have said something different in other circumstances) And it breaks my heart. Rory needed an I am sorry I hurt you, an explanation of why she was abandoned and the reassurance it will not happen again. She needed to hear an ‘I will wait for you no matter how long and no matter where’ He may had the intention to say it but he can’t deliver it because he is not ready yet: he has too much unresolved trauma and seeing Dean just brings everything out. 

So she gets in this absurd relationships with Dean and Logan (the worst, absolutely the worst, no doubt) . When the bubble breaks she is just not able to navigate through life. 

And life goes by, it turns out Jess finds himself. Jess finally starts believing in himself. He is resilient and he has held onto the feeling he could do anything he wanted Rory had about him. He could not have written the book without her because he has held onto his love for her and doing so he wrote a book, got it published and pushed through life the same way he always has. He has found people that get him and he gets to be in a good place. He has matured. 

Next two times he sees Rory, he is in the position to say it, to offer her everything to really start a beautiful life together. He has put his pieces together, he is calm and happy with what he is doing. But guess what, Rory is a mess. And it is ok, it is  totally  believable. Sometimes in life, things don’t go as we want and you are a mess and you throw everything away and you just let it go. Jess just helps her to go back ( partially) on her feet. . He doesn’t try to win her back because he understands it is not the right moment. He is ready, she is not. And she tells him she loves Logan ( Logan of all: the one he has nothing in common with, the one that cheats on her, the one who does not care if she leaves Yale or anything she does, the kind of guy they made fun of) because to ‘love’ Logan is easier,  because if she does not have the deep connection, it won’t hurt that much and it doesn’t. She finally rejects his proposal and he leaves and she is fine, it does not hurt that much because it was not real love. He is not her soul mate. He will never be. 

And now they are both 32 and Jess has grown better and better. Although we do not get to know a lot about his relationships he has nothing permanent. He could have found love, we could have seen him happy. That also happens in real life. You really move on, you are lucky enough  to have a mature fulfilling relationship and live a happy life but he does not. Jess had a lot things going on in his life but he has never cheated on anyone or lied to himself about his feelings, so probably just casual relationships without attachment because he knows it would not work, he is not over her.

The thing is that she is still having issues. Awful relationships she knows are not going anywhere and same thing with jobs. She has lost contact with her feelings and her passions and when that happens it is not easy to go on. But guess who is going to put her in contact with her feelings again. He does. Starting with the book. And when she goes on writing, well that will make her remember how it was to feel real love. And well yeah, we have an open ending, which is not my favorite but I get to write my own ending and to play it in my head. Because that look through the window, that happiness when she showed him the three chapters, that is a lot. And they will need to talk about feelings, about wounds and also about books and about the future because now they are ready to heal and to start over no matter where. Together. 

#jess mariano #literati #jess x rory #rory x jess #team jess

[juuheizou]

what makes mutsuki genuinely angry/upset? how does he act and how to make amends?/also how does he like phisical affection ir affection in general seriously i love this pookie so muchh i just want to drown him in love and softness and gentleness🥹

SAME SAME SAME.

He is deeply upset by injustice and suffering of others, canonically to the point of doing reckless shit just to try helping. We know seeing his teammate in turmoil or even a stranger possibly walking into peril clouds his judgment and I can see him needing to break down after working a particularly tragic or gruesome case because how can something so terrible happen to someone?

I can also see him denying within an inch of his life that he is ever angry on his own behalf, but he does have smaller, more personal things that make him angry, or hurt, which it can be hard to tell the difference when you're in the thick of either one. He truly likes to help others and doesn't mind going out of his way for those he cares about, but it hurts when his efforts are taken for granted without so much as a 'thank you,' especially if he's met with criticism or mockery for that effort. I could also see some anger making its way through his bleeding heart if someone messed up something he had spent a lot of time and effort on, or the one thing in forever that was supposed to just be for him.

When he's angry or something in that vein, he tries so, so hard to calm down, breathe through it, bottle it up, whatever it takes to keep being calm and patient with everything. He's the type to keep saying that he's fine even when his voice is breaking while he says it. But the more upset he gets, the harder it is to calm down, so he gets snappy and passive-aggressive at small things that he normally tolerates, like 'a dirty dish or two in the sink' small. Then it evolves into similar short, moody behavior over nothing. Someone can simply be in the wrong place at the wrong time. When he finally explodes, he can be prone to yelling at people, even if what they actually did in the moment doesn't in any way warrant being yelled at.

As far as making amends with him for something, he is a pretty forgiving guy. To a fault, even. True, like anyone, he appreciates changed behavior more than anything and as he grows and achieves a relatively healthy adult level of assertiveness, he is better at drawing the line when that doesn't ever happen. However, a lot of the time he will still accept the most basic bitch apology and it takes mistakes and consequences on his part for him to stop accepting amends that aren't really amends.

This poor boy so seldom thinks he deserves affection, and will deflect, deflect, deflect no matter how much he wants or likes what another person is doing for him. When we first meet him, he has a hard time even knowing, let alone articulating, how he likes to be shown affection, because it's just a far-off idea he doesn't deserve and has no idea how to accept. Deep down, though, all this deflecting leads to him having a backlog of things he likes the idea of and thinks might be nice. It's another as-he-gets-more-confident thing for him to even realize it himself, but he likes it when people thank him for all he does for the people he cares about, when they compliment him or something he did, or just tell him he can do something he's nervous about or he's helpful or he's handsome. He also loves it when his friends and loved ones carve out something special to do together, even if it's just coffee or watching a movie.

Physical affection is especially hard for him, but once he makes it past the first, biggest barrier he has up from all he's been through, he's in the deep end and I can see him having a bit of a needy phase when he first realizes that it's safe to allow someone he really trusts to touch him, though it would probably temper itself on its own with time to get used to that safety and trust. Just like all types of affection and attention, he has that same backlog of untried fantasies that he just cocoons himself in, which also contributes to that initial needy phase. I think he likes kisses, cuddling, even a simple hug, as the cherry on top of a special, sweet moment, whether it be an honest-to-goodness date or just a few seconds alone together. When it comes to SFW stuff, he likes soft, gentle touches and protective cuddling that makes him feel safe and cherished.

#listen i can talk about suzuya all night long but i just need to say the mutsuki asks i've gotten make me so happy #idk if you can tell but i also want to drown him in affection #mutsuki tooru #answers #anon

[the-r0adh0use]

No art today, but I've really been thinking about the rkn's characterization as of late.

They're honestly the antithesis of each other; their character traits clash and clash hard but I feel like that makes for a very nice sibling dynamic they have with each other. I also like to hc that their differing personalities was an intentional design choice by Wily.

I'll explain what I mean, just know that I'm not great at articulating my thoughts and this is more of a stream of consciousness than anything else. So! With that in mind:

Enker--Based on his CD data, we know that he's very dedicated to destroying Mega Man, and takes it very seriously; he's a hard-ass with a gloomy personality. Hell, if you know anything about Enka music in general you'd know he's pretty much a physical representation of the music's soulful but sad melodies.

He is so dedicated to his programming that he would rather put himself in harm's way (i.e. sustaining damage to use the Barrier Spear) if that meant he could destroy Mega Man. He is an agent of order dedicated solely to completing his tasks.

So, when said agent of order failed at his one and only task, it makes sense for Wily to overcorrect. Why not design a robot to be the complete opposite of Enker?

That's when Punk was created.

Punk--He's loud. He's brash. He's hates PTAs and the government. Ya gotta love him.

Anyways, he couldn't be farther removed from Enker. While Enker is stated not to stand out, Punk loves showing out, represented by his love of accessories. While Enker would prefer to uphold the status quo, Punk wants to shake it up and have fun doing it.

His personality is heavily based on his namesake, Punk music, which has its roots in anti-facism and rebellion against "the man." It fucking rocks. This is heavily contrasted by the melancholic, "refined," Enka music. Y'see where I'm getting at?

I find it interesting that Punk's entire existence is a paradox considering I'd imagine he has disdain for any kind of authority, Wily included, but must follow Wily's orders anyways. But that's a text post for another day.

Back to the main point, even his fighting style is contrasted by Enker's. Enker's has a level of elegance to it, while Punk just throws his entire body at you. However, this doesn't mean Punk is reckless. In fact, this attack is pretty safe considering he can't be damaged while in his ball form. This is contrasted by Enker's extremely unsafe, even reckless, method of attack, that requires him to sustain damage.

But even Punk, the agent of chaos, wasn't enough to stop Mega Man.

You probably noticed that I haven't touched on Ballade yet. And that's because he doesn't really have any contrasting traits compared to his brothers. Wily must've realized he swung too far in both directions with Enker and Punk, so he made Ballade as a nice middle ground between the two.

Ballade--doesn't really stand for much except fighting. He wants to fight a strong opponent, and views himself as the "strongest" robot, and because of this he can come across as single minded. He feels too standard, too plain.

But his complexities are revealed once he is beaten and realizes what he is fighting for is wrong. He respects Mega Man's power, something that neither Enker nor Punk did.

Maybe the reason why he was able to break Wily's programming was because he didn't stand for much, able to break his base instincts because of his "weak will."

Or maybe because his will was so strong was the reason he broke his programming. Was he, perhaps, tired of fighting for Wily, and saw self-destruction as the only way out? I haven't decided myself.

Whatever the case, in his dying moments he was able to stand for something: ending up on the right side of history by helping Mega Man.

So sorry if this was a rambling, confused read! I've got that RKN autism, lmao. Btw, I really wanted to dissect Quint some too since I consider him their adopted brother, but it was getting way too long. A text post for another time! :)

#rkn #mkn #megaman #rockman #enker #punk #ballade #dr wily #world 5 #text post #mega man #text

[vanibear]

Genuine question: do you think people are more likely to paint sora as (emotionally) naive, rather than a more book-dumb kind of way? like being too trusting of people, that kind of thing

ahaha anon So i kind of accidentally wrote an essayish in response, but it ended up moving on from ur question to expanding on thoughts i have abt characterizations of sora, oopsie 

but TLDR: To answer your question anon, i actually think its about equally both, and i think perceiving him with a lack of emotional maturity can bleed into perceiving him with a lack of intelligence; sentiments like friends as your power and leaving no one behind can seem naïve and irrational if one doesnt think that sora comprehends his odds and still chooses to proceed because his heart believes it is right. while sora does have a ways to grow emotionally, especially in regards to his own feelings, i dont think that he lacks knowledge when it comes to relationships and understanding others emotions, which is actually rather his strong suit. i also think that sora is generally very smart, and just dont quite understand why people portray him as not quite being so

~ the aforementioned ramble ~ ooo good question ! hm. i think more often i notice people characterizing him in a book dumb sort of way, but honestly that could be bc it bugs me more. however, we dont know if sora did well in school or not/what level of education he got, so instead of a strictly textbook smart sense, i see it more as a lacking the characteristics of someone who is book smart sense? basically, people painting him as airheaded, oblivious, or not very eloquent; i think especially with jokes or complicated subjects going over his head. but, if you look at his dialogue (and, while this is more subjective, puzzles and challenges he has to overcome in the gameplay), thats usually not the case? hes delivered plenty of introspective and articulate lines; hes witty, sarcastic, and even sometimes rude; hes incredibly adaptive and resourceful considering the situations he’s thrown into, and hes a quick learner, as shown by his keyblade skills.

however, i think some of these perceptions do come from how he is a very emotionally driven person. he follows his heart and is loyal and trusting to a fault, and that can cause him to take actions that seem impulsive, illogical, and naïve. however, i think sora is very knowledgeable of emotions because of how he connects with people. he’s incredibly empathetic and understanding of others and has made friends with nearly everyone he meets because of that; which i believe is an incredibly difficult accomplishment. while his feelings can lead to mistakes, they are also his greatest strength; he will try his best to fix those mistakes. where i believe he really struggles is in processing his own emotions.

and on that, sora is pretty self-deprecating, and laughs off a lot of things, which sometimes can cover up just how talented he is because even he denies it. i think that oftentimes, sora himself believes that he’s dumb, or lesser in comparison to others, which can lead to people taking that at face value if they dont look deeper

however. sora is still a cheerful and silly guy, and thats an important part of his personality too! he is an energetic, optimistic teenage boy who really just wants to have fun with his friends and thinks that everyone should have a happy ending.

sora has a lot of different dimensions to him, but unfortunately characters that have a seemingly cheerful disposition and noble motivations that come off as idealistic can often get sanded down to being stupid because they’re seen as too naïve to understand the gravity of their situation.

to clarify, i dont think that soras never been dumb. keyboard (and keyblade) smashing is probably not the best idea if a computer isnt working. but, in my opinion, i think sometimes we dont give sora enough credit in our depictions of him, and tend to exaggerate certain qualities of his while forgetting others

#DISCLAIMER everyone interprets and perceives characters differently . I am not mad at you if view sora like this #these are just my own preferences and thoughts based on how I personally see him . #and thats partially shaped by me having adhd and seeing a lot of myself in sora. my strengths and often get covered over by my weaknesses #such as getting distracted or not being unable to understand something or making bad decisions . it can be disheartening #and can really make u feel stupid .and make you ignore the fact that thats not true #but yeas whatever !! i love sora. He has adhd #eep i dont usually ever do analysis like this so I hope everything makes sense !! #sora #kh analysis #kh #kingdom hearts #kat post