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finding-the-daylight · 4 years

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So, now that my finals are officially over, I am going to proceed to have a drink or two or three and rewatch Eclipse. Here’s (soberly) what I remembered from the film prior to starting this account (since starting this account, posts re:Eclipse have reminded me of things I’m not going to include in this introduction):

1. Bella is basically playing tic-tac-toe with Edward and Jacob and her feelings for them. She can’t make up her mind. When I watched it the first time, my dad was in the living room half paying attention to it and said she was very selfish.

2. Edward tries to control Bella, but it’s “out of genuine concern for her”.

3. Jacob tries to control Bella, but it’s “out of genuine concern for her”.

4. Both fight for her affection and even though she’s engaged to Edward, she won’t let go of Jacob.

5. When the newborn army shows up, Bella cuts her arm with a rock.

6. There’s awkward tension in the tent.

That’s literally all I remember of the movie while sober (aside from what I have relearned from posts about Eclipse on this blog). My drunken thoughts will be below the break:

Okay, so this dude I think his name is Riley is lowkey kinda dumb, no offense. Like he just stood there and screamed “WHAT DO YOU WANT?!?” This is how all horror movies end badly. You don’t talk back. You run or hide or esape.

THE MEADOW IS SO FUCKING PRETTY. IT’S THE PUREST THING WE HAVE IN THIS FANDOM OMG HE’S PLAYING WITH EHR HAIR AND I JUST WANT SOMEOEN TO PLAY WITH MY HAIR. DAMN BELLA, MY FINALS ARE OVER. SUCKS TO SUCK, DOESN’T IT?

I never noticed the CUllen cuff before, but now thanks to this blog it’s all I’m looking @ lmao.

I FCKING LOVE CHARLIE TOO MUCH AND HE DESERVED BETTER THIS WHOLE TIME. HE IS SUCH A GOOD FATHER AND HE DESERVES THE BEST.

THERE’S A GLOWING RED LIGHT OUTSIDE MY WINDOW WTF I THINK IT’S THE REFLECTION OF A CAR LIGHT BUT I FUCKING SWEAR

NVM ITS GONE

WHAT THE FUCK EDWARD?? YOU MESSED WITH BELLA’S TRUCK SO SHE COULDN’T SEE HER FRIEND? FUCK. I WOULD’VE DUMPED YOU AND LEFT YOU IN THE WOODS BRO.

Edward sitting with Bella’s friends. We can’t help but stan. He’s still a bitch for the truck thing though.

I love how Alice looks @ Edward and tells him the party will be fun because she knows nothing bad will happen. But then he reads her mind and looks conerned wtf is ognna happen?

Side note: I really like the lighting in this movie. Everyone has a healthly glow. They lokk happy.

The fucking Volturi always gotta ruin everything. Bitch ass hoes. Ol’ crusty asses acting like some outdated monarchy. Why don’t the vamprires start a democratic government?

Charlie really deserved better. Like I know they couldn’t tell him teh truth but they could’ve been slightly less untruthful prbabl.

I WANNA FIND SOMEONE WHERE MY MOM SAYS WE’RE LIKE MAGNETS WITH EACH OTHER. I WANT SOMEONE TO LOOK @ ME LIKE I’M THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE. DAMNIT EDWARD. DAMNIT STEPHENDW.

Y’ALL ARE TELLING ME THE ENTIRE CULELN CLAM COMBINED COULDN’T TKAE OUT VICTORIA? THIS SHIT IS GETTING UNREALISTIC LMAO.

THE MUSIC THAT STARTS PLAYING WHEN JAKE TURNS AROUND IN THE PARKING LOT SENT ME LMAOOOOO.

Leah is such a badass and I wnat to be best friends with ehr plase.

ALSO FCK THIE IMPRINTING STORYLINE.

SAM AND LEAH WERE HAPPY TOGETHER.

NO BELLA YOU DON’T FUCKING WANNA KNOW WHAT IMPRINTING IS. NONE OF US WANTD WTO KNWO. IT NEVER SHOULDVE BEEN WRITTEN.

Taylor and Kristen are such babies in this movie. They’re so young and precious. WHIH REMINDS ME WHY TF DID SPTHEJNFNWFNA MAKE THIS SEIRESO ABOUT CHIDLREN??!?! I STILL SAY IF THE CHARACTERS HAS BEWNNF MORE MATUEE AND IN LIKE THEIR MID OR LATE TWNETIEMS OR THIRTIS IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER. FIUCKUNG FIGHT ME.

INITING BELLA TO HEAR THE TRIBE’S HISTORIES? THE CULTURAL APPROPRIATION FUCK STEPHEN0AWFJQ. BITCHJ.

SETH IS SO PRECIOUS. AGAIN. THEY’RE ALL SUCH BABIES. THESE POOR CHILDREN.

this hwoel shite is sof ukcing offensie. bitch. listen. why tf did stpehwb fafb have to appropriate cultues like this? BITCH>> you do realize if the legnds are actually like this they’rel ike that because it’s aout defeating yo white as sright? like your’e aware stpehebe ?

omg bree is so scare d poor baby. literally why did stephenjdbawfbi do this? she just wnated to be ok not hurt anywaon.

exuce me vut CARLISLE IS HOT AS FUCK BITCH

edward is saying some real romantic shit and i sill hate him for the turck thing but like he loves her so much btu he’s stil an asshoel in this smovie

I’M ABOUT TO HATE JACOB I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONES I’VE SEEN THE GIFS HOE WE GONNA GIGHT. BITCH SHE JUST TOLD YOU SHE DOESN’T LIKE YOU DON’T PUSH HER LIKE THIS. DUMBAS S HOE BITCH. YOU’RE GONNA FIGHT FOR HER? I’M GONNA FUCKIN FIGHT YOU BTCH. I WISH SHE WAS ALREAYD A VAMPIRE SO RTHAT PUNCH WOULDA HURT BITCH YOU DESERVED IT.

THESE FUCKWITS ARE FIGHTING OVER HER AND NOT LISTNEING TO HER THEY ARE BOTCH CANCELLED. BELLA NEEDS TO LEAVE BOTH THESE HOES AND GET A NEW MAN WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS HOW TO LISTNE. BITCHES.

I love Emmett so much. BELLA SHOULD FINA A MAN LIKE HIM. IT’S WHAT SHE DESERVES.

ROSALIE IS ABOUT TO POP TF OFF. SHE IS A QUEEN AND I LVOE AND SUPPORT HER. the saddest thing about this is that she thought her life was perfect and then some fucking asshoes ruiend it. she was so happy. wtf im gonna cry. fuck. i hate sptehej n so much. these gross ass hoes i’m gonna cik all theyre assses. this is so gross i’m so angry literaluy setthing beithc. BUT THEN SHE GETS HER REVENGE AND IT’S BEAUTIFUL. FUCK THOSE BASTARS. but she;s so sad it breaks my heart. she wants to be human so bad. this scene is so sad and it’s theonly good scene in twilight and nikki reed deserves an ocsa like if you agree.

jane and alec more childrne who should’ve been able to be children fck the volturie

why the hel is jessica the fucking valedinact ion? it should’ve been bella they made her seem so damn smart but now she’s not theo ne? i don’ beliee it. but anna kendrick is a gift and now i wanna watch ptiche perfect. CHARLIE is so pure he deserved better and i’m gona kep saying it.

i love those fucking rose colored lamps hanging at the cullens house int he window at hte party scene can anyone link them to me i need?

why the hell is the wolfpack athe cullesn hosue? this doesnt make sense and it doesn’t seem real am i too drunk and imabginf this?

jno wait it’s real. jake’s appolgoizng.

how fucking conventinet the woflpakc is there hwen alice realizes there abotu to be attacked. this aint realistc. bitc.

why are these kids being forces to act like audls? “I wans;t asking for permission” hoe you’re like 16 go home and go tib ed and odnt go to war.

these woflies gonan kick yo ass edward get tf out

i’m laughign nrow but nothigng funy is happening lmaoooo

fck carlisle is really hot as fuck his jawline kills me

i hate jasper’s hair here i’m sorry i know we all lovehim bt heis hair is a dam nmess

belal is so fuckign negative all the time no one is gonan get killed exceptsvictoris

THE COWBOOIIIII WHY DOES HE LOOKS LIKE OWNE WILSON IN THIS DAMN LIGHTIN? ALICE AND JASPER LOVE EACH TOHER SO MUCH MY APLOGIZKE MAAM FCK IT UP.

why thfe fuck is hake comparing his situaton with leah and sam and emily? We are nto the same hoe wae are not the same. bella is choosing edward sit yo ass down. but i still thin kyall are both problemastic as fuck in thos movie and hse deserves better.

CHARLIES DESEVRS BTETER THEY KEEP LYIGN EVEN WHEN THEY DUCKGN DONT NEED TO

reblog if you thought edward and bella wre gona fuc, when she went over to his house in eclipse when yo ufirst read the book or saw the movue

he really oes love her a lot though fkcn i’m so alone

he looks si sad wgen he mentind ices tea on the porch poor edward

EVERY DANM MOMENR OF FOREVER BITCG I WANT LOVE LIK THST

LITERALLY THIS IS THE SUTPEIDEST PLOT EVER. A WHOLE FUCKIN ARMY TOO ATTACK ONE IGRL? BITCH. THIS AINT EVEM A THING.

im gettign ral tired yall dik if i waill mke it to the end of this movie but i will tru

i hate the enrgey from jae and efard in this tent. ya’ll are both dumb hoes and she could do better than either ofy ou.

WRHAT THE FUCK FASTER IF YOUR TOOK YORU CLOTHS OFF BITCH WHAT THE FUCK NOW I AM GONNA FUCKIN PUNCH YOU IB HOEP BELLA OUBCHES YOU WHEN SHES A VMAPRIE STUPID HOE 16 YEAR OLD SHOULD BE AT HOME IN BED INSTEAD OF IN A TENT TRYING TO FIGH A FCUKCN WAR

edward is such an emo boi in the tent and he thinsk she doesn;t lve him any more. yo ua stipiud hoe edearf but she still loves you anwyab ithc.

wheb edward said i’m not gonna force her into naythign ever agin i realized he was hte better man good for you eddie you fickun manned up you win

MY REASON FOR ESXITNST HOE I JST WNAT TO BE LOVED

now edwards bene a fuckboi again trying to hurt jake b ymaking sure he knew they were getting maried edward what the fuck iw was just starting to be on your side agian and you let me down like this

jacob is beign an emo boi now jake go be a child @ home and stop this nonsense you’re not a man go be a chid and take a nap and eat some grilled cheese youkk feel better

now she told him she wants to kiss him wtf bella don’t kead this bitch on he’s already in pain let hom gp home and eat a grilled cheese

mow bella’ supsetti spaghetti because edwards know she kissed jake

this shit is so unenecasialr dramtic wht the fuck yall like a whole army ofver one girl and then its like all everyboyd trying kill everybody this is bulshittheyre all children who should eb at home eating grileld chesses not at war

victoria is a real bitch lying to this boy telling hin she lvoes him hoe bitch

og shit efward ifs pissed now he’s tauntign ab ithc

i acutaly kinda fel bad for riley he wnet through so mcuh and was manipulated i wish the cullens could have adopted him and bree

oshit is the volutire

SAM DONT FUCKUGN TALK TO LEAH LIKE THAT EVER AGIAN YOU HOE

CARLISE AND I REPEAT AGAIB IS HOT AS FUCK FUCK CARLISRL

I LITERALLY AHTE THE VOLTURIE FOR KILLIGN VREE THEY WILL NEVER BE FORGIVEN

JASPER KNOWS WHATS GOOD HE DOESN’T TURST THESE HOES

I’M SO PISEED THAT THE CULLENS NEVER FUCKING IFHT THE VOLTURIE LIKE CARLISLES IS SMART AS FUCK AND EHS TILL WONT START A DEMOCRAY LIKE YALL KNOW ROSLAIE WOULDVE FOGUHT FOR THAT SHIT TOO

I LVOE YOUDADY CARLISLE

THIS 16 YEAR OLD LYING UP HERE BECAUSE OF TE DUMBASS WAR I TOLD YALL TO GO GOEN AND EA A GRILELD CHEDWE

poor jakie he knows hed better good for her but she reallys loves eward jake deserved better than what he got reblog is youf agree he jst said he’s even love her after she’s a vamprie bruh go eat a grilled chease and love yourself

WERE BACK IN THE FUCKING MEADOW ITS LIT AND ITS LOVELY I WANNA FALL IN LOVE IN A MEADOW WITH A HANDAOME MYSTERIOUS MAN WHO LOVES ME UNCODNITONATLY

KIRSTNE STEQARD IS THE WBEST AND SHE DESERVED AN OSCAR FOR THIS MOVIE HER AND NIKKI REED AND NODBOYD ELSE

fianlly this bitch is gonna beh onest with chalrie took you long enough

that was an anticlamtnc ending but i love love

#Twilight #Twilight renaissance #drunk twilight #drunken twilight #twilight while drunk #twilight review #eclipse #eclipse review #eclipse while drunk #drunken eclipse #simp ass hoes fandom #simp ass hoes

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sainadazai · 3 years

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Chapter 1

Welcome to U.A highschool!

How you got in, you had no clue, but you were thrilled none-the-less as you approached the large building on the first day of school. See, compared to the others at your entrance exam, you hadn't really stood out.

It was a really tough time considering your whole life was spent getting ready for that moment, but you truly underestimated the people you were up against.

One boy, was flying around on burst of fire, knocking out robot after robot, and you were knelt on the floor still disassembling your first one. Throughout it you couldnt stop comparing your own skills to everyone else's, and everyone else seemed better.

So it came as a huge suprise when a hologram of all-might himself announced that you had been scored second place out of all the applicants. Coming in at 68 points. Maybe the stress kept you from actually counting how many robots you had rendered immobile, or completely turned to mush.

After thinking about it, the test really had been catered to your quirk, you were bound to succeed. Quirk- metal shift vs a ton of robots? Why had you been so worried?

The confidence boost from your score led you to this day, a prideful glint in your eyes as you marched through the halls of U.A. trying to find your class.

Rounding a corner, the sight of a large door with 1A on it met your eyes. Why had the door been so tall? Would there be giants in your class? Is that even a quirk that exists?

So many questions circled your mind, as well as excitement. See, spending your earlier years training all the time had really impacted your social life, or lack-there-of. Being busy means no friends, being a nerd means no friends, being cocky means, you guessed it- no friends.

A hero school had to be different, though. Everyone here would understand the need to focus on work, theyd just be able to work together with you. Opening the door, your face held excitement for the possible friends on the other side. Excitement to have conversations with people, instead of your cat, mochi.

What you didnt account for was how scary it would be for somebody who spent the last 16 years being friends with a cat, to talk to other girls. Or boys. Or anyone.

"Hi, my names mina ashido! I saw you at the exam. Your so cool!"

There she was, a pink skinned girl with beautiful curly hair shaking around in an afro as she spoke. Her black and yellow eyes shiny and focused on you. She had you cornered between her well-toned body and the door, jumping around and advancing.

It must've been years since anyone but your mom had called you 'cool'. Must have been months since another kid innitiated conversation with you. Were you meant to know what to say? Were you supposed to be sorry? That was ussually what you said when people confronted you like this at your old school.

A smile was spread across her round cheeks, so she must not be upset with you. Was it an upset smile? Well, best to just apologize and wait to talk to someone more calm.

You tried to tame your wide eyes and flustered stance before looking the ground and muttering an apology.

Little did you know how her face dropped in confusion at the interaction. She had just wanted to make friends after all. Mina had really not understood the apology either, sure that she had definitely given you a complement.

However a green haired boy entered the room and she was quickly distracted.

A new problem arose now. Where to sit? The plan to be friendly and extroverted had taken a fatal plumet, so in the old y/ns nature, you settled at the seat closest to the back. A boy with dual colored hair sat in the desk next to you, looking fairly unbothered by the other students.

Assuming this wasn't on purpose, you figured you'd try again with the friends thing. So after setting your bag down and sitting quietly in your seat. Allowing the ruffles of your skirt to become even more-so.

"Uhm, hi?" You tilted your head at him, in question with yourself.

His eyes lifted from what he was reading to see if he recognized you, when he didn't they returned to his book. Staring only a side glance.

Well there goes your big ol ego from the exam results. Guess you'll take a jump back into the sea of self doubt.

You slumped sadly in your seat, the boy was quite pretty, hair vibrant red and shining white. Pale skin, all over except for a large scar over his eye. You wondered if it hurt? Or was it old enough to just be a painful memory? Was it even a scar, it could be a birthmark?

Thoughts circled your head like that often, you were just always so curious. How could you not be curious when you knew so little?

Shifting uncomfortable in your seat, and relentlessly shraightening your uniform you caught on to the other conversations in the room.

A mean looking boy sat with his feet on the desk, while another frantically told him to stop. It was quite the funny scene, you even found yourself smiling at it. How can it be so easy for them, you wished you had maybe taken more time to read on social dynamics before applying here.

Maybe you could read more about it when you got home? I'd be nice to interact like that some day.

A green haired boy looked very flustered as he spoke with a female classmate. Everyone seemed to be in the class, you counted 20 people.

"If your just here to make friends then you can pack up your stuff now"

I looked all around me but couldnt tell where that deep voice came from. Must be an authoritive figure, or else why would he threaten our places here?

Still not finding the origin of the voice, it spoke again.

"Welcome to U.A.'s hero course.." The monotone of it was quite jarsh, but the voice was soothing in a way. Deep and rumbley and soothing? Your thoughts were getting ahead of you, really.

Then, over by the entrance, a yellow caterpillar stood up and unzipped itself. Wait, what?

Out stepped a black haired man, dressed in a long sleave shirt.

"It took eight seconds for you to shut up, thats not gonna work. Time is precious."

He completely dropped his shell of yellow to the floor.

"Rational students would understand that."

Four students stood right in front of the man, shock and disbelief on their faces. Why hadnt they realized he is our teacher? Are they dumb? If so, how'd they get into U.A.?

From the way he refered to us and his assertive tone, he must be the teacher. Thats also made obvious by our current lack of teacher, him being the only adult in the room. What was that yellow thing though?

"Hello, Im shota aizawa, your teacher."

Yes, you knew that. However, it seems everyone surrounding you was taken aback by this. All simotaneously gasping at his statement.

"Right, lets get to it, put these on and head outside" he held up a p.e. uniform, clear enough instruction.

So students shuffled around to grab uniforms and head to bathrooms til we all made it outside.

"What!? A quirk assesment test!?" The whole class question, too loudly for your liking.

However you did question on the inside. It would make sense your teacher wanted to scope your abilities now, that way progress could be measurable. It would also help him know what he is working with.

A squeaky voiced girl worried about missing orientation, but you were dreaming that anyway. You wanted to be a hero, and it wasnt allowed to use your quirk elsewhere. So this was possibly the best start to the day.

"You've been taking standardized tests most of your lives, but you never got to use your quirk before."

Bold of him to assume. You hadn't actually learned that cheating was bad until the age of 10 so, until then, you used your quirk for everything. Cheating tests included, but it would be fun to see how this played out.

The faces around you were all focused and stiff, ready for whatever task this would present. The dual haired boy being amongst those stiff faces, but his seemed almost bored. He didn't really act like he wanted to be her at all.

That made you mad, why even come if you don't wanna be here? Its so hard to get in here, and there were other people like you out there, who have wanted this since they were born. He would waste a spot just so he could be bored?

"Bakugou, you managed to get the most points on the entrance exam," Mr.Aizawa adresses that boy you were worried about.

You remembered his face, how he was beating you so fluidly the whole time. However, if he scored highest, your only one rank below him. Hope he is a strong competidor for first, so it'll be all the more glorifying when you take that spot from under him.

"What was your furthest throw with a softball, when you were in junior high?"

"67 meters i think..."

"Right. Try doing it with your quirk. "

"Anything goes, just stay in the circle. Go on, your wasteing our time."

"Alright man, you asked for it.." He stretched his arms, confidence written all over his face.

What a fun rival, if only you could actually speak with him. If this is what all of you will have to do, not sure how succecful you can be. You quirk is awesome for sparring and combat, but throwing a ball? Your gonna have to figure that one out quick, before you start of the year with a bad grade.

The blonde swung his arm back, and around in a baseball pitch motion. Then as he release it, some sort of explosion emmited from his hand. Softball no where to be seen, you glanced around at my fellow students. Shock, especially the green haired boy, they were all shocked.

You wanted to be shocked, but you were aware of his power, he really didn't go all out in the entrance exam at all. This blasting was way stronger than what you saw him using on robots.

Yet, you werent shocked, you were impressed, excited, thrilled to have other strong quirks around.

You had to know everyones quirks as soon as possible, you had to make friends. This is why you came here, to be a hero. So when you glanced to your side, at the scar boy with a stone face, another thing was added to your list.

You were gonna get him to want to talk to you.

#todoroki x reader #todoroki fluff #shoto torodoki #todoroki shoto x reader #mha todoroki #mha bakugou #mha deku #mha fanfiction #mha fluff #momo yaoyozoru #momo x reader

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beautyindisguise00 · 4 years

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WHAT’S THE BIGGEST SURPRISE YOU’VE EVER HAD?

Friday night October 16 2020 @5:50pm

1. WHERE ARE YOU FROM? Wisconsin

2. WHERE DO YOU LIVE AND FOR HOW LONG? i’ve been in wisconsin my whole life of 24 years. lived in my hometown all the way til i moved to college. after i finished college i decided to stay in the town i went to college in for work purposes

3. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE THING ABOUT WHERE YOU LIVE? the different options around town of where to shop, eat, and other fun things to do

4. WHAT DID YOU LOVE THE MOST ABOUT THE TOWN YOU GREW UP IN? the lake. i love the fact that the lake was only a 5 minute drive and i was able to go there whenever i wanted. but also, the memories of the town.

5. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? not anymore

6. WHAT WAS YOUR 1ST PET’S NAME? thumperlina for my big fat brown bunny

7. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? fall

8. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE? i watch a lot of movies so i dont really have a favorite

9. FAVORITE MOVIE IN THE PAST 5 YEARS? avengers infinity war. avengars endgame, crazy rich asians, knives out, and maleficent 1 and 2

10. WHAT’S A MOVIE THAT YOU LAUGHED THE HARDEST DURING? ouf, i dont remember

11. WHAT’S A MOVIE YOU CRIED THE HARDEST DURING? avengars, crazy rich, and also while you were sleeping but that’s a drama

12. WHAT’S THE BEST-ANIMATED MOVIE EVER CREATED? the good dinosaur

13. FAVORITE TV SHOW? my two all-time favorites are one tree hill and the office

14. FAVORITE TV SHOW THAT IS CURRENTLY ON? chicago pd and fire

15. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE RESTAURANT? olive garden?

16. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? chicken alfredo, really good sushi, fried rice, curry

17. LEAST FAVORITE FOOD? any seafood --> shrimp, oysters, clams

18. WHAT TOPPINGS DO YOU GET ON YOUR PIZZA? pineapple and ham. hahaha yes, im that kind of person

19. FAVORITE BEVERAGE? coffee, strawberry lemondae

20. FAVORITE DESSERT? cheesecake or red velvet cake

21. IS THERE A DESSERT YOU DON’T LIKE? pumpkin pie

22. CAKE OR PIE? cake!

23. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? mackinaw island fudge, mint chocolate chip, strawberry cheesecake

24. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE CONDIMENT? honey mustard

25. WHAT DO YOU GET FOR BRUNCH? crepes with nutella and strawberries

26. IT’S 4 AM ON A SATURDAY NIGHT, WHAT DO YOU EAT? fried noodles with two poached eggs

27. WHAT ONE THING DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR FRIDGE AT ANY GIVEN TIME? eggs

28. WEIRDEST THING YOU’VE EVER EATEN? duck and this one indian thing i dont remember

29. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE BAND? one direction and tenth avenue north

30. FAVORITE SOLO ARTIST? liam payne, harry styles, niall horan, louis tomlinson, zayn malik. hahaha and ed sheeran, halsey,

31. FAVORITE NONLIVING MUSICIAN? --

32. FAVORITE LYRICS? “and if the whole world was watching, i’d still dance with you” “baby im falling. head over heels. looking for ways to let you know just how i feel”

33. FAVORITE SONG OF ALL TIME? theres no way i could choose

34. FAVORITE ALBUM? again ^^

35. WHAT’S THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? currently singing like to the “while you were sleeping” ost right now “it’s you” by henry

36. IF YOUR LIFE WERE A SONG WHAT WOULD THE TITLE BE? beauty in disguise

37. WHAT SONG WOULD YOU PROBABLY BE CAUGHT DANCING ALONE TO? any of my current favorites right now

38. IF YOU COULD SING A DUET WITH SOMEBODY WHO WOULD IT BE? halsey. that would be so cool

39. IF YOU COULD MASTER ONE INSTRUMENT WHAT WOULD IT BE? guitar

40. WHAT IS YOUR GO-TO KARAOKE SONG? ugh, i hate karaoke

41. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING OR THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? probably back when i was rereading one of the “to all the boys i’ve loved” trilogy

42. WHAT’S A BOOK THAT YOU PLAN ON READING? prayer by tim keller. i just ordered it online and it should be coming in on monday

43. WHAT’S A BOOK THAT YOU READ BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE WAS READING IT? twilight series. haha

44. WHAT’S A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT POSITIVELY SHAPED YOU? mhmm...i dont remember. not that it posititive shaped me but the great gatsby was really interesting. also, when i was student teaching, i read number the stars with my kids and it was a great historical fiction book to read

45. WHAT’S A BOOK IN SCHOOL THAT YOU HATED? i didnt hate it, but there was this one book we read in ap lit and as a project, my friends made the movie version of it

46. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE BOOK? to all the boys trilogies

47. WHAT’S A BOOK YOU WISH YOU HAD WRITTEN? ^^

48. DARK CHOCOLATE OR MILK CHOCOLATE? i like both but if i had to choose, then dark

49. UNDERWATER OR OUTER SPACE? underwater like in a submarine or something were i knew i was safe

50. DOGS OR CATS? dogs for sure

51. KITTENS OR PUPPIES? ohh, puppies of course

52. DOLPHINS OR KOALAS? dolphins! i really wanted to swim with dolphins when i was in florida but it didnt work out in our schedule

53. BIRD WATCHING OR WHALE WATCHING? whale watching

54. WHAT IS YOUR SPIRIT ANIMAL? i dont really know. probably a sea otter. haha theyre so chill and they stick around with their peeps

55. TO BE OR NOT TO BE? aint that the question to be answered

56. IPHONE OR ANDROID? iphone

57. TWITTER OR INSTAGRAM? insta

58. VINE OR SNAPCHAT? snap. i never had a vine but i remember watching a few vines. well i guess tik tok is the new vine now

59. WHO SHOULD EVERYONE BE FOLLOWING RIGHT NOW? Jesus. haha kidding not kidding

60. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE APP? WEBSITE? probably youtube

61. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? psych

62. WHAT WAS YOUR BEST SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? psych and math

63. WHAT WAS YOUR WORST SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? ap lit

64. WHAT SUBJECT WOULD YOU TEACH IN SCHOOL? psych or a lower level math class

65. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU KNEW IN HIGH SCHOOL? enjoy what you love doing as much as you can

66. WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE YOURSELF AT 13? girl, be confident. you are beautiful. you are smart. and you are enough. dont worry about what others think and dont worry about the future because i got you.

67. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′0

68. WHO IS YOUR FASHION ICON? eh, no one really

69. WHAT’S YOU FAVORITE FASHION TREND? well since right now is fall, i really like long cardigan with cute booties

70. WHAT ARE 3 THINGS YOU ALWAYS HAVE IN YOUR BAG (BESIDES PHONE AND WALLET)? phone charger, hand sanitizer, and a mask. haha oh covid days

71. WHAT IS A CURRENT TREND YOU HOPE DOESN’T EXIST IN 100 HUNDRED YEARS? masks

72. WHAT’S YOUR MUST HAVE FASHION ACCESSORY? eyebrows done? haha my clothing fashion is pretty simple so i dont really have accessories but maybe a watch i guess

73. HEELS OR FLATS? depends. on a day to day then flats but for special occasions then heels

74. DIAMONDS OR PEARLS? eh, i guess i like both

75. BLOW-DRY OR AIR-DRY? usually air dry unless i need to be ready asap

76. WHAT COLOR DRESS DID YOU WEAR TO PROM? i didnt really attend my high school dances. my first and last hs dance was homecoming and that was only because i was on the homecoming court. i wore a red strapless dress

77. FAVORITE COCKTAIL? sex on the beach, mimosas, strawberry daiquiris, margaritas

78. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY ORDER AT STARBUCKS? white chocolate mocha. either hot or iced depending on the weather

79. COFFEE OR TEA? coffee. i tried to drink more tea but i always resort back to coffee. haha

80. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR COFFEE? i usually make my coffee at home. i just put in a mocha or caramel kcup then add in creamer. some days i’ll add in half and half or some chocolate/caramel syrup

81. WHO IS A PERSON YOU WANT TO HAVE COFFEE WITH? megan markle. odd but why not

82. WHAT HISTORICAL FIGURE DO YOU WANT TO HAVE COFFEE WITH? general vang pao

83. IF YOU COULD LIVE IN ANY HISTORICAL DECADE, WHAT WOULD IT BE AND WHERE? probably the 90s

84. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE COUNTRY TO VISIT? havent left mine yet. haha

85. WHAT’S THE LAST COUNTRY YOU VISITED? my own. haha

86. WHAT’S A COUNTRY YOU WISH TO VISIT? somewhere in the east. maybe like france or italy or korea or taiwan

87. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE STATE TO VISIT? florida

88. WHAT’S THE LAST STATE YOU VISITED? michigan

89. WHAT’S A STATE YOU WISH TO VISIT? colorado, new york, california

90. WHAT’S THE BEST VACATION SPOT? bora bora! ouuu someday for me i hope!

91. WHERE DOES ONE GO ON A PERFECT ROAD TRIP? honestly, anywhere. just gather your friends, pack up, stock up, and drive

92. FAVORITE CITY? right now, probably orlando

93. PILATES OR YOGA? i like both but if i had to choose then yoga

94. JOGGING OR SWIMMING? swimming!

95. FAVORITE WAY TO WORKOUT? ugh, at home

96. LEAST FAVORITE WAY TO WORKOUT? at the gym lifting weight. i always feel so awkward

97. BEST WAY TO DECOMPRESS? shower, then dinner and movie in bed with a glass of wine

98. WHAT’S THE BEST FIRST DATE IDEA? dinner and a drive to a fun spot

99. WHAT’S LOVE? genuine love towards someone regardless of their flaws, always

100. MAJOR TURN ON? neck kisses, vlines, touching

101. MAJOR TURN OFF? bad hygiene, rudeness, cockiness

102. WHAT’S THE WEIRDEST THING A GUY HAS DONE OR SAID TO TRY AND IMPRESS YOU? stalk my facebook and screen shot my old posts and send them to me OR ignoring my non-subtle hints that i have a boyfriend and do not want to hangout alone to “netflix and chill”

103. WHAT’S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT SOMEONE WHEN YOU MEET THEM? their smile and personality and how they made me feel

104. DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT? nah

105. BEST GIFT YOU EVER RECEIVED? im not really a big gift person but my mom gave me a micheal kors winter jacket

106. LAST GIFT YOU GAVE A FRIEND? i bought some baby shower gifts to my boyfriend’s brother and sister-in-law’s baby, baby Grace :)

107. BEST GIFT TO GET FOR SOMEONE? like a generic gift? probably wine or a watch depending on the occasion

108. WHAT’S THE BIGGEST SURPRISE YOU’VE EVER HAD? my boyfriend coming to visit me last christmas because i was so stress out and i thought we were suppose to meet up around christmas but he had his own plans that i was not aware of which then made me even more stress when i found out his plans but overall it was a very nice surprise and definitely helped me destress afterwards

109. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR? white

110. LEAST FAVORITE COLOR? probably brown

111. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE TYPE OF FLOWER? i dont think i have one

112. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE COMEDIAN? dont have one either

113. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE ACTION STAR? chris evans, tom holland

114. BEST SUPERHERO CREATED? captain america

115. IF YOU HAD ONE SUPERPOWER WHAT WOULD IT BE? to teleport

116. WHAT’S YOUR KRYPTONITE? too much snow. haha

117. BIGGEST PHOBIA? deep waters and heights

118. FAVORITE DISNEY MOVIE? dont have one

119. FAVORITE DISNEY CHARACTER? ^^

120. FAVORITE HOLIDAY? christmas

121. WHAT’S YOUR BEST HALLOWEEN COSTUME? a dead bride. haha

122. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE PLOT-TWIST? whenever my favorite characters in a tv show gets killed off

123. IF YOU COULD DO A FLASH-MOB WHERE WOULD IT BE? new york, like how cliche and iconic that would be

124. WHAT’S THE COOLEST THING IN YOUR BEDROOM? my pineapple lamp

125. IF YOU GOT A TATTOO WHERE WOULD IT BE? probably on my side or somewhere on my arm

126. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE CURSE WORD? shiiiiiiiiiit

127. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE BOARD GAME? exploding kittens not really a board game but close enough

#beautyindisguise00 #gettoknowme #q&a #survey #questionnaire

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onlinemarketingcourses · 5 years

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PIN’s: The Future of Private Link Building

1,116 Comments 20 minutes

What I’m going to reveal in this blog post is a strategy that will likely weed out a certain section of the ViperChill audience. In other words, I’m fully aware that this blog post will make a particular type of person unsubscribe from ViperChill and likely never return. It’s certainly not going to end up on the homepage of Inbound.org.

If you are loyal to Google guidelines, the teachings of blogs like Moz and love playing by the book, then you’ll probably realise with this article that we possess a very different perspective. When I first started my internet journey – where I spent day and night trying to make a living online – I tried and tested more website ideas and angles than you would believe.

Today, I’m still pushing the boundaries to see what works. These boundaries most often pertain to SEO, since it’s what I’ve enjoyed the most over the last 11 years.

I’m in the fortunate position that my business it not tied to some employer who dictates how I have to do things when it comes to promoting web properties. As such, I’m always willing to ignore everything I previously thought about marketing and to be open to new ideas and opportunities.

This blog post details one such opportunity, but I realise it will not be for everyone. Not everyone is the position to implement it for their online business, and even if you are, you may question the ethics of what is coming up.

With that disclaimer out of the way, today I’m going to introduce you to the world of PIN’s. Just before I do that, I want to talk about why I think they’re necessary.

I Predict We’ve Got Four to Five Years Left to ‘Do SEO’ As We Know It

This isn’t some “SEO is Dead” article you see go viral in the SEO blogosphere every six months, but a genuine prediction based on how Google search results have evolved over the last few years.

Google make all of their money via ads so quite simply want more people to click on them (and more often). The less success people have with SEO, the more likely they are to move to Google’s advertising platform.

Long gone are the days when we’re presented with just 10 blue links on a page.

The White Space Between Search Results Has Increased

It’s known that the higher up the page a search result, the more clicks it will receive. Therefore, when organic search results are pushed further down the page they’re going to be receiving fewer and fewer clicks. Not only are they lower down now in mobile results due to spacing, but the change is being tested across desktop results as well.

The search result on the left includes the new extra spacing with the ads taking up far more vertical space than the search result on the right (graphic via SEMPost).

There Are More ‘Featured Snippets’ Than Ever Before

There isn’t much to say on this one besides feature snippets are to be found for millions of search queries in every industry imaginable. What, when, how and why questions are often answered with a featured snippet box.

This not only pushes ‘organic’ search results further down in search results, it also attempts to give you the answer right from the results page. We can argue whether or not it’s useful for searchers, but for SEO’s, it gives new meaning to having the top result in Google.

‘Map Packs’ Completely Changed Local Search Results

Some call them ‘map packs’, some ‘the local pack’ and some even call them the ‘snack pack’. Whatever your term of choice, after being introduced a few years ago SEO’s have been trying to figure out how to get themselves and their clients into the pack to compensate for a lack of expected search results.

After all, these local listings take up a large portion of screen real estate.

I’m not complaining about this change; I’m simply pointing it out. There’s no doubt it makes search results more useful and that is Google’s aim (usually) after all. While Google did reduce the listings from seven to three back in August of 2015, the redesign of the listings with adding spacing means not much changed in terms of organic results being seen.

Those Map Packs Now Contain Ads, Too

We’re not going back to Google updates of a few years ago to make a point about Google evolving. Just last month Google announced that the map / local / snack pack would now include ads, as shown below.

This image is a mockup by Barry Schwartz, though the real thing looks very similar

It’s interesting to follow both PPC and SEO guys on Twitter and see the difference in reaction. PPC guys are over the moon since it gives them more traffic opportunities for their clients and SEO guy’s, well…I’m sure you can guess the reaction.

Based on how Google’s past, it’s not one of surprise.

They Have All The Answers

The knowledge graph was released in May of 2012 and it’s almost disappointing when you don’t see it for queries when looking for quick answers. For example, when I want to see how my football team, Newcastle, have fared against Liverpool, I literally don’t have to click anywhere.

Whether you want to learn about how old someone is, what 12 x 56 is or who discovered Radium, Google has the results right there for you. As a searcher, I love these quick answers, but as an SEO, it’s just one more thing which has lessened the likelihood of people clicking on my website if it doesn’t appear in this box.

They Continue to Make People Scared of Link Building

Google are great at making people fearful of performing any type of SEO. After all, this was the company that introduced the rel=”nofollow” attribute so we could link out to websites without giving them “link juice”.

That isn’t the real headline for the article – I’ve got to have some fun in these serious posts – but Google have publicly cracked down on pretty much everything when it comes to link building. The list includes, but is not limited to:

Guest posting for links

Using directories for links

Utilising private blog networks

Adding links to website themes

Adding do-followed links to widgets

They literally created a ‘no-follow’ tag

That’s not all; they openly share how much human intervention is involved in finding people abusing the guidelines, rather than algorithmic. This tweet speaks volumes.

Anglo Rank was a small network being promoted on the Black Hat World forums.

Just think about this for a second. One of Google’s first employees (and former Head of Web Spam), worth millions of dollars, dedicated his time to actively targeting a tiny little network on some private forum just to scare other people away from doing the same.

The simple fact is that Google can’t figure out with absolutely certainty which links are earned, or bought, or manipulative, very effectively.

Now I’m not taking anything away from Google here. Their company is worth hundreds of billions and mine, well…isn’t. They have undoubtedly created the world’s most sophisticated search engine.

But as I said earlier, it’s far easier for them to get us to police ourselves than it is for them to police us.

Big Brands Dominate the Long Tail

As SEO becomes increasingly difficult and searches are more and more dominated by big brands, the long tail will be the final frontier of search traffic opportunities.

When I said we only have a few years left to do SEO as we know it, the long tail will be where the majority of SEO’s focus their time through on-site SEO changes and content marketing.

While we’ll still have opportunities for SEO to ‘work’, long tail search results just don’t seem to be as diverse as they were in the past. It makes sense to me that Google have some kind of ‘filter’ whereby if they’re not sure what to list for a search result, they simply show more results from an authoritative site to be on the safe side.

Logically, this makes sense, but as an SEO, it could be a worrying sign of things to come. You can see this lack of diversification above in my screenshot of the map packs as well, with Yelp dominating the first three organic search results.

The Lack of Diversity in Search Results Will Only Get Worse

If you’ve only found ViperChill recently then it was likely because of my recent article, How 16 Companies Are Dominating the World’s Google Search Results. It has been shared thousands of times on social media and been read over 40,000 times, making it one of the most popular articles I’ve ever written here.

In the article I highlighted how Hearst Media were using their brands like Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan and Woman’s Day to point footer links to a new website of theirs, BestProducts.com.

That strategy, which would get the rest of us penalised, continues to work incredibly well.

“Just follow the Google guidelines.” Why?

Since that post, I was also contacted by a few people associated with the brands I had featured. One of those people I talked with was Tre who works in the growth department of About.com. I had already mentioned in the article how About planned to spin off into many more verticals over the coming months, which he confirmed.

I admit I’m being a little pedantic with my highlighting, but when you’re Director of Growth for About.com you’re going to share which terms are driving traffic to one site with the team that is in charge of another.

I appreciate Tre’s replies and I’m sure there’s only so much he can say, but About.com’s real goal with their spin-off’s is to no doubt own ten search results, instead of one.

PIN’s: My Version of Fighting Back While I Still Can

When I talked about why I started using private link networks and then continued to use them after Google’s “crackdown”, my primary reason was very simple: Writing quality content and getting ‘whitehat’ links wasn’t working for me. I was being outranked by people with crappy link networks who could build their own ‘relevant’ links on a whim and I decided to fight back.

You could view PIN’s in a similar light. I am utilising them because we’re not competing on a fair playing field, and what is supposed to work is very rarely what ranks, at least in the industries that I operate in.

While I don’t wish to reveal those exact industries, let me give you an example closer to home, with ViperChill.

I will say in advance that this is a search term I really don’t care about ranking for. I have no idea how many times it’s searched for each month and honestly, I doubt it gets many searches at all.

Here are the search results for the query, ‘Future of blogging’.

My site is usually either in 10th or 11th for that term, yet by every SEO standard metric I should be number one.

I have more links to the page ranking than anyone else

I have more ‘domain authority’ than most other pages

My title tag seems more relevant than half of them

Yet in order to get more traffic for this search term, which I think I ‘deserve’ from a 10,000 word article which took me weeks to put together, all I have to do is one thing.

It’s not getting more links. It’s not improving my on-site SEO. It’s not building better connections with influencers.

All I need to do to get my traffic back is to add a sentence to the start of the article which says ‘Last updated: July 25th 2016‘.

This is a search result where how recent an article was posted is more important than whether it’s actually a good page to rank.

I don’t actually have to update the article; I literally just need to make it appear to Google – thanks to that one sentence – that my article was updated recently. This one sentence, this ‘trick’, would bring me back the ranking I feel I deserve. (Though, again, I doubt this even gets searched for. It’s just an example).

This is not theory. If you look at the first sentence of my WordPress SEO guide that’s exactly what I’ve done before, with great results.

This little change is not too dissimilar to what I need to rank in other industries. I don’t need better on-site SEO. I don’t need to build natural links from relevant sites through content marketing. I simply need to add more domains to my private link network and write more guest blog posts.

Yes, these are both tactics that are looked down upon by Google, but they still work incredibly well. In 2014 when I covered Google’s crackdown on private blog networks I did mention that they would now be less likely to care about private link networks.

In my exact words:

What I expect to happen is that Google will ease off looking into private networks. The damage is mostly done.

Why? Because they’ve already made people scared to build them. The best way to deal with people trying to game the system is essentially making us as a community police ourselves so we don’t try to game the system in the first place.

The continued use of private link networks and guest posting for SEO is part of the reason why I will get a lot of criticism from this post. How to implement these tactics more effectively, which I’ll talk about later, will be the larger reason for criticism.

The Approach to Take

One of the first ideas I had when I started out online was to assemble a team of people who could work together to build a huge website. At the time I was following the growth of TechCrunch and Mashable and saw how quickly they were able to grow thanks to having a team of writers.

My idea was to essentially connect a team of people who all worked on one website and in return everyone had a percentage ownership. The logic being that working as a team would result in the site growing faster and even if revenue or a sale price was split, we would have more success than working on our own.

It’s a similar idea a number of ViperChill readers had after reading my last article on the small number of brands dominating Google search results.

While it’s a nice idea, in theory it doesn’t work so well.

Some will want to dictate the direction of a site that others don’t agree with and more importantly, some people will put in far more work than others. If you’re writing more content than others and your articles are getting better traction, you’re going to want to increase your ownership compared to someone barely putting in any effort.

There is another option you can utilise if you wish to team up with others though, and that’s a PIN.

It comes with all of the benefits of creating your own team, without the downsides of worrying about who is contributing what work.

What the Hell is a PIN?

A PIN is a play on the acronym PBN, which is commonly referred to as a private blog or link network.

I’ve received my fair share of critics over the years for talking about PBN’s and their success – and continuing to build them – but there’s a reason I do: They work.

I simply don’t believe that playing by Google’s rules is always going to get me the results I want. In some industries I wouldn’t make the money I do without them. I don’t use them for clients, but do for my own websites.

Going forward, I think PIN’s are going to be crucial to my success in certain industries, and I think they are going to be crucial to a number of people reading this as well.

PIN, stands for Private Influencer Network.

Before you think that just means making some “friends” online and building up your connections, allow me to continue.

I define a Private Influencer Network as a group of people looking to rank their websites in Google in similar industries (but not the same) who work together to help each other reach their objectives.

Essentially, they use any opportunities they have to build links (such as private blog networks, guest blogging, interviews, blogger round-ups) to send backlinks to other people in their network. In return, other people do the same for them.

The end result is that for the work you would do to build ten backlinks, you can get twenty to forty (of the same quality) in return.

A $100,000/m PIN Operating Right Under Your Nose

I first came across a Private Influencer Network a little over a year ago. A few ‘influencers’ in a particular field were using their private blog networks to – quite simply – link to each other.

I didn’t think much of the tactic at the time, until I found another example of this happening just a few months later.

Then three months after that, I found my third example. This time it really got my attention.

A group of just five people (from what I could tell) were ranking in one of the most profitable industries online and undoubtedly making over $100,000 per month in the process. I operate in the niche, which is how I found their collaboration, and know the numbers very well.

This is when I started working on building my own, PIN.

Finally, the idea to write this blog post came to me when I found yet another PIN. One of the members of this network is one of the most well-known SEO’s on the planet and is reading this article. He already “knows I know.”

If you follow the SEO blogosphere, you’ll undoubtedly know who he is.

One of the sites they are promoting also very likely also makes more than $100,000 per month. I’m not involved in the niche, but I know others who are and with the rankings they have, those numbers wouldn’t surprise me.

I reached out to the owner of the ‘money site’ they had all teamed up to promote. I keep a private database of paid link opportunities and one of them costs more than $10,000 per year. I found their website there, so sent the main owner an email.

One months revenue spent on link building is a small price to pay when you’re doing huge numbers thanks to gaming Google.

While some would view four to five guys linking to each other to make more than $100,000/m from a one-year-old website as shady and unethical, I’m personally impressed at how well they are crushing a very competitive niche so quickly.

While there is a chance that a PIN could be “outed”, the last two examples I found were so well put together that I’m almost certain I was the only person who connected the dots.

If you’re not trying to rank in an obvious industry that’s constantly monitored by SEO’s – like blogging and internet marketing – the chances of your PIN becoming uncovered are relatively low. Much lower than having your private blog network discovered.

As you’ve probably already figured out more succinctly than I am at getting to the point, members of a PIN use any opportunity they have to ‘link out’ to take care of their whole team.

While I’ve been fairly slow on the uptake to building my own PIN, I have been slowly building them in a few industries over the last few months and I’m excited to see what the future holds.

I didn’t want to write this blog post until I had a better understanding of how to build and manage them, because managing them is actually the most time-consuming part.

You have to make sure everyone in the network is pulling their weight and giving (and getting) equal opportunities. Opportunities, of course, is code for links.

A Real-World Example of How a PIN Works

One of the websites I find myself checking for ideas and inspiration is Entrepreneur.com.

I recently found an article on the website, published by a contributor and not a staff member, which could serve as a great example for how PIN’s work.

Let me say it in bold (for those just skimming) that the example below is totally legitimate.

I’m highlighting it because it’s natural, but could have been used in a non-natural way.

While the screenshot below might be the longest ever embedded by me into a blog post, there is something much more important that I have to say about it.

There is no specific reason I have singled out this article. It was simply the first article on Entrepreneur.com when I was looking to give an example for this post. Proof of that is the date. This article is going live on July 25th whereas this article I’m featuring below is from July 22nd.

It just happened to be a great example to see a PIN (or what could be a PIN), in action.

I made the article a little shorter than the original (the screenshot was long enough, I know) but you can see the majority of it here. The first thing you’ll notice is four mentions of Weekdone. Unsurprisingly, these are all links to the company that the author works for.

A good guest article, utilised for a PIN, will link to other recommended resources that are connections of the author. The links should be relevant, but also to other people in your network so that you are ‘owed’ a link back.

Now on the surface (without my large logos stuck over the text) this looks like a totally normal article (albeit with a little overuse of linking back to the authors employer). If you do a little more research, you’ll learn that the other two highlighted companies, Zlien and Mavrck, are actually clients of Weekdone.

In other words, Weekdone likely earn some bonus points from their clients for mentioning them in an article on Entrepreneur.com. I see nothing wrong with this and it’s a one-off occurrence so it’s not done for SEO manipulation; I’m just trying to show how a PIN link looks without actually revealing one.

Essentially everything looks natural until you look under the hood. It’s normal for a client to talk about a company they use, as shown below where the relationship continues.

Once again, I’m not saying they’re doing anything wrong here. It was one of the top articles on Entreprenuer.com as I was finishing up this article (the post is only three days old) and happened to make a good example.

The truth is that Entrepreneur.com, along with Forbes and the business sections of the Huffington Post, are great resources to see mini PIN’s in action. The people who write content for these sites generally try to get as much out of writing for them as possible.

They link to their friends, and their friends link to them.

A PIN in Action

I wanted to create a graphic for this section but your understanding of the concept is far more important than your ability to decipher my poor Photoshop skills. Before it gets a little bit crazy, I have assumed that there are just two ‘influencers’ in your private network.

The yellow box is your money website (the website you wish to rank in Google).

The brown boxes are private blog sites you own (optional).

The grey boxes are link opportunities you’ve created through guest posting or similar.

While the graphic is admittedly not the prettiest (I did warn you), the concept is very simple.

Some of your private network domains will point links to the other influencer in your network, as will some of your guest posts on other websites.

In return, the other influencer will do the same for you.

Once you start adding more people to your network, things get a little bit more messy, but the principle remains the same.

When I try to visualise this with four influencers as part of your PIN it gets a little ugly, but here goes.

The golden rule you need to remember is this: If you receive a link from someone from a specific source, you need to replicate the link in kind.

So if you receive a link in a guest post from someone in the network, you need to give them a link from a guest post you write. Essentially meaning that the work you do for 10 links for yourself gets you 30-40 links in return. This number varies because sometimes it’s a bit risky (such as using blog networks) to link out to the same sites which are linking to you but you still receive more links than you would have without your network, for essentially the same work.

The Types of Links Which Are Shared

I originally tried to write these guidelines as if there were four people in a PIN but it became a little bit too complicated to read (and write). Instead, I’ll assume there are only two people in your PIN and show you what types of links you could generate or other ways to help each other.

If there are more people in your PIN, which I highly recommend, then understand that Influencer #1 will sometimes link to #2, while #4 sometimes links to number #3 and so on. It’s basically just varying the following link opportunities to keep things fair for everyone.

The types of reciprocation that can take place.

You can tweet or Facebook share an article from another influencer

You can retweet or publicly thank another influencer for mentioning you

You can utilise a guest post opportunity to link to a relevant quote or article from another influencer

If you use build private blog networks, you can use some to link to other influencers

If you find articles where comments drive traffic to your site, you can inform other influencers

When being interviewed you can link to a relevant quote or article from another influencer

Sharing link opportunities you find on your site they can utilise for theirs

Offering website design advice

Utilising Web 2.0 properties to give links and get the same in return

If performed properly, there is no reason to hide that you have a connection with other influencers in your niche. The only thing you would have to care about is that the obvious mission for having these connections is to help each other’s search engine rankings.

If you are outside of the internet marketing world you don’t really have to worry about other people finding your private link networks, but always keep a few rules in mind to avoid footprints.

Ready to Build Your Own PIN? Here’s My Advice

If you see the benefits of utilising a PIN for your own search engine rankings, and actually getting more than rankings in return, then here’s my advice for setting one up.

A PIN Must Have a Leader

As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t want to write about this topic until I had attempted to do it myself.

My short but relevant experience tells me that there has to be one person (or two at most) who is in control of the group you gather together to make sure that everyone in the team is pulling their weight.

In other words, you need to make sure that the people who are receiving links are doing their part in giving them as well.

The leader must also make sure that members of the team are active. It’s no use everyone playing along for the first few weeks while the idea is hot and then dropping off the map.

Bringing Together Your Team

While some of you may be excited about getting started on this – and some horrified that I’m even talking about it – there’s one important caveat to keep in mind.

Do not bring anyone into your team who has never shown any self-drive in terms of search engine optimisation.

If someone:

Doesn’t already have a website they wish to rank

Doesn’t regularly produce content for their own sites or others

Doesn’t have at least a basic knowledge of SEO fundamentals

Don’t invite them to be part of your network.

I assumed this would be the case from the start of building my own, but I’m even more sure of it after trying to get other people excited about the idea who weren’t actually willing to contribute to the rest of the teams’ success as a whole.

A simple test to see if someone would be right to join your network is to send a candidate over to this article and have them read about this concept for themselves.

If they don’t immediately “get” the idea and they don’t reply with something like “I can see this working well” then it’s not someone you want on your team.

You shouldn’t have to convince anyone to work with you. They should see it for themselves. If they’re against it because of ethical reasons, then that’s totally fine (and understandable) but again, it’s a sure sign that they’re not someone you want in your team.

As far as communication goes, there are a few platforms out there that would be useful.

You could create a Skype group where people get together. I certainly recommend that everyone get on a call together at least some point to make sure you all understand each other’s roles.

Slack is another good option, as you can keep up to date via their mobile app and have a history of previous agreements.

A private Facebook group is another good option.

Both Slack and Facebook allow there to be a leader who can add or remove members to the network.

The platform is really up to you. My only recommendation is not to lay out all your plans in Google Docs ;).

Take One Step Back from Your Current Niche

It should be obvious but I’ll state it anyway: You don’t want to work with people who are targeting the same keywords as you.

However, you still want to connect with people who are in a relevant niche (I’ll give you the chance to connect with ViperChill readers at the bottom of this post). For instance, if you’re promoting your real estate website then it makes sense to team up with other realtors, just not for the same region.

If you’re in the weight loss niche then it makes sense to collaborate and grow your audience with other people in that niche, but target different keywords and / or promote different types of products and services.

Whatever niche you’re in, imagine you’re shopping for that specific industry on Amazon but go back one category to find people to work with. Again, I’ll give you the opportunity to find PIN partners at the end of this article.

Footprints are Hard to Find, But Still Be Careful

From the PIN’s I’ve discovered and the ones I’m working on myself, I’ve found you really don’t have to be too careful when it comes to leaving some kind of footprint. After all, it doesn’t ring any alarm bells when Copyblogger keeps mentioning Problogger or Mashable keep linking to TechCrunch. It’s “natural” and something you can expect from the owners of websites who have developed friendships with each other.

Where you have to be careful is primarily with private blog networks and not creating footprints of clearly linking back and forth to each other from the same sites at all times. Of course, you don’t have to use private networks, but remember for each link you give out, you can get three to four back, so it can dramatically speed up the process of ranking your site.

You Need to Know How the Microphone Works

And how to sing.

One of my favourite authors, Daniel Priestley, said the following in his book The Key Person of Influence;

You don’t need to know how the microphone works, you need to know how to sing.

He was referring to the technology behind the microphone and how, when it was first invented, your time would have been better spent learning how to sing than how a microphone worked, if you wanted to reach a lot of people.

When it comes to ranking in Google, I don’t think that’s the case. You need to know how the microphone works and how to sing.

There are going to be people who worry I’m encouraging armies of people to come together to take over the Google search results.

The truth is that I don’t believe people who can’t sing – in this case, can’t produce great results for search engine users – will have much long-term success.

There’s no point putting all of the work into your PIN if the end result is going to be a crappy website.

The third example of a PIN that I mentioned earlier now easily does in excess of over $100,000 per month. What I didn’t yet tell you is that they built a fantastic resource for their industry. The site doesn’t have many pages (less than 50), but each one genuinely solves a question that a particular searcher is looking for an answer to.

I don’t view utilising a PIN as a way to “sneak” up the Google results and send thousands of visitors to an ad-riddled website.

Instead, I see it as a way to help you start getting great content noticed that could attract natural links once it is.

I mentioned at the start of this article that I would likely weed out some of the audience of ViperChill. I want to make it clear though that I’m not trying to help people with shitty websites rise to the top of Google.

While I believe there is a great opportunity here, it isn’t easy. Turning the concept into reality sounds much easier on paper (or in a blog post).

The truth is that when it comes to making money online, most people are, quite simply…lazy.

They may be excited about this idea for a few weeks but if you’re going to use this to rank in an industry worth ranking for, you should be aiming for keywords that take a few months to get any serious traction for.

Links Aside, The Connections You Build Can Be Invaluable

I’ve already briefly talked about the other benefits this kind of network can have, besides link building.

You can connect with people who have a genuine passion for your industry who in turn spur you on to put more work into your site and help you improve your online ventures. Whether that’s giving advice on your design, your writing, your strategy or anything else.

Working online can seem lonely at times, especially if your offline friends don’t have an inkling to do anything online. When you’re aiming to make money from your web projects it’s nice to find other people on the same journey.

In my future of blogging post a few years ago, one of the most popular on the site, I mentioned how some bloggers had worked together to help grow their respective audiences in the same industry.

TechCrunch and Mashable grew incredibly quickly at the same time while investors were putting more and more of their money into web-based projects. They mentioned each other thousands of times.

Smaller operations – though still huge – like Copyblogger and Problogger would guest post on each others’ sites, promote each other’s products, send traffic to each other via their email lists and essentially enhanced both of their own images through their connection.

I took the time to actually figure out how many times some sites mentioned each other, which you can see in the graphic below.

While links were a key factor in all of these partnerships, I wouldn’t essentially class them as private link building. Most of the links didn’t include any specific anchor text and they weren’t to random affiliate sites or anything like that. All of them were trying to build authoritative online businesses and found someone with a similar passion on the same journey.

While TechCrunch and Mashable were almost in direct competition with each other, they still highlighted the stories that the other site got to first. Michael Arrington later sold TechCrunch to AOL for $25m. Pete Cashmore is still the CEO of Mashable though according to Politico.com, is trying to sell the site for around $300-$350m.

That’s a partnership that certainly paid off for both of them. Pete holding out six years on his sale seems to have been a smarter choice, however.

A Facebook Group to Find PIN Partners

For what is probably a very limited time only, I’m giving access to a private Facebook group where people can assemble together to potentially build their own Private Influencer Network.

I don’t want the comments here to be full of pitching opportunities, so let’s take this elsewhere to see what industries you’re working with. To be approved for the group you must leave a comment here with your Facebook name or put your Facebook initials at the end of a comment. Facebook will likely recommend the group to people who have no idea what PIN’s are and I don’t want to do a lot of moderating.

Don’t reveal your exact niche when you start a discussion, just simply zoom out of your niche and reveal a higher category that you would like to work in. You can find the group here (remember to comment to be approved).

Thank you, as always, for reading.

Send Me Exclusive Tips

Enjoy this post? Please leave a comment below…

Comments are my number one indicator as to which posts people enjoyed the most, so your feedback really does help me. If you have any questions, feel free to ask those as well…

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Ihave finicial problem right now ipay for six month liability $ 300 it us too much for me is there any body knows less than that price iget please let me know?

Does Wal-Mart have better and cheaper insurance than Obamacare?

http://www.examiner.com/article/washington-examiner-walmart-s-health-plans-are-better-than-obamacare On Jan. 7, 2013, The Washington Examiner released the results of an investigation finding Walmart's employee health insurance is significantly better than Obamacare. Walmart has come under mega union labor union criticism as a retailer whose employees are both underpaid and mistreated. Like many insurance plans which have been canceled as a result of Obamacare benefit regulations, Walmart's health insurance has been called substandard. However after an in-depth comparison, the watch dog team of the Washington Examiner discovered employees of Walmart receive a better bang for the buck than Obamacare. In comparison to Obama care, it was discovered that Walmart plans were a whopping five to nine times less expensive. Full-service individual coverage in a Walmart HRA plan is available through a Blue Cross Blue Shield preferred provider organization for as little as $40 a month while family coverage averages $160 a month.""

Which car insurance company will accept me; I have a few traffic citations on my record?

Since 2006, I have gotten 3 speeding tickets on my record, and 1 citation for getting into a turning lane too early (3-pointer). I got a speeding ticket in march 2006, february 2007, and december 2008. I got the last turning lane citation just a few weeks ago. I am going to court for both recent citations (from December 08 and a few weeks ago) pretty soon. I will use a no lo contendre to reduce the points on one, and ask to do community service or take a class to reduce the points on the other. I understand that most car insurance companies look at both POINTS and OFFENSES. I am with Liberty Mutual right now under my parent's family plan and since 2006, NONE of my tickets have affected our insurance. I want to take precautions and see who can quote me for having a poor driving record as I mentioned above. This year just might be the year Liberty Mutual will review my record and then, BOOM...rates are sky high. I want to responsible about what I did and get on my own plan soon. What I did was irresponsible and stupid and I am DONE making mistakes on the road. I'm 22, female, a student with a 3.47 GPA (Dean's list), trying to finish my bachelors at a university, and share rent with my brother for an apartment. I work part-time and go to school full-time. Which companies would accept me? I've got a poor driving record, but a good 'student' record--if that even matters. Please help. Otherwise, I will have to wait till some violations clear in 10 years or so. Either way, I would really appreciate if someone could tell me what my options are. I will be out of school by summer 2010 (next year) and will need to get on my own plan by then.""

Disadvantages of having free healthcare insurance?

like costco wholesales helping non employees on health insurance coverage

Best Averaged sized car for a teenager?

So I'm going for my license soon and we're starting to look at cars to get me around. I want something that's pretty easy on gas, reliable, easy on car insurance cost, doesn't cost an arm and a leg but ALSO isn't a tiny car like the Chevy Aveo because most of the people in my family are pretty tall for instance my mom is 5'9 I'm 5'7 /5'8 and my other sisters are also about the same height. I've been thinking about the Prius because I hear it's got some leg room and is easy on gas, but people say that batteries are more harmful than regular ones and all this jazz. Then I thought about the Honda Insight but I heard that the headroom in the back is not comfortable. I was thinking the Hyundai Sonata, but the only model I really like is the 2011 and I don't think the insurance company takes kindly to teenagers driving new cars. I would prefer not too big or long a car like the Toyota Avalon, but it's manageable. Any suggestions?""

How much might they charge me for no insurance ticket in wyandot ks?

was following my boyfreind in my brothers car and I took a wrong exit near the speedway. I went down stateline rd looked for a gas station for directions. Found a gas station to ask for directions and the guy did not speak understandable english so tired and lost I took off down the road and forgot to turn my head lights on was puulled over and given a ticket for the lights and it turns out that my brother did not have insurance on the car and that I had forgot my purse way down in pittsburg. I am being told that I may have to pay a $1200 fine and get some weird insurance that cossts $300 or more a month and that it is possible htat they will take my liscense away. This can't be rite?!!? I have a clean driving record and only make $250 a month can't hardly pay rent. Sombody who knows awnser please!!!!!

Car insurance for 18 year olds?

I'm 18 years old and I'm trying to find out how much it would be for me?

Which of the following are proof of insurance?

i wanted to know is $35,000 cash to dmv, dmv certificate of self-insurance, insurance policy card from car insurance, or all of that is proof of insurance""

Car insurance?

how do i get cheap insurance for my son, he has only just passed his test couple of weeks ago. we stay in the UK.""

Where can i get life insurance for my daughter who has cancer ?

Do you have to have sr-22 insurance on a motorcycle if you need it on a car?

there was a judgment entered that i have to have sr-22 for 3 years b/c of a car accident that my insurnce company would cover me on. i now want to buy a motorcycle and need to know if i need sr-22 for the bike. i have non owners sr-22 from the courts judgment

2003 Hyundai tiburon 2dr coupe. Insurance price?

So I'm a 17 year old girl.I'm getting my first car. Idk if where I'm from makes a difference, I'm from texas. Would a 2003 Hyundai tiburon 2dr coupe be considered a sports car on the insurance? If so, how much more would it be vs. a normal car? Please help me!!!!""

Need help understanding some insurance terms and policies.?

What is a HYBRID health insurance plan? Has anyone used this type plan?, specifically NEW HEALTH CHOICE, GOOD HEALTH. Beyond this...does anyone know of a good, affordable insurance for TEXAS. I really need help understanding this type plan. Sound too good to be true therefore it usually is.""

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Car Insurance not Paying (in Georgia)?

I was in an accident three weeks ago. It was the other car's fault. There were no injuries. We didn't call the police, but I got a written statement from the other driver admitting fault. I got her car and insurance information and filed a claim with her insurance. They sent an appraiser and I got an estimate for the damages. So all that is left now is for the insurance to approve the estimate and send me a check. I have called the insurance company almost everyday since I got the appraisal (about 2 weeks ago) and they are saying that they are waiting to get in touch with the policy holder; apparently they don't have her correct phone number. But they have the signed statement from her admitting fault. The agent in charge of my claim doesn't even pick up the phone or return my calls, I just talk to the operator who can't really give me any answers. I have the basic car insurance, I don't have collision coverage, so I haven't even called my own insurance. My car is operational but my rear susspension is gone, and the bent metal is hitting my tire; I really need my car rapaired asap. Should I call a lawyer even though there were no injuries? I should probably add that my car is not worth much, but I still need it fixed! and I can't afford (don't want either) to pay for repairs out of my pocket. What should I do? Thanks in advance for your help.""

Individual medical insurance plans?

I am getting ready to go into a contracting position and there is no medical insurance provided meaning I will have to supply the insurance for my family. Does anyone do this, and is the insurance deductible on the taxes? I am living in Indiana and the plan would cover 4 members including myself.""

What is the average cost for health insurance a month?

I need to know the cost for health, and dental insurance a month.""

Why is car insurance quote from tesco 550 whereas competitors quote over 1000 ?

i went through swinton, axa ,norwich union, high performance, churchil, and a couple others. they did not even come close...is this possible? i am a bit suspicious, if that tesco quote is reliable, but they say when i call that i can complete the whole process online and i do enter the same detail as on other websites.""

Just hit a deer while ago (Questions about insurance)?

While ago a deer ran out in front of me and caused a bit of damage to my 2002 Toyota Camry. Although the damage doesn't appear to be [i]too[/i] bad, (hood and bumper are bent, and the right headlight is a bit out of place though it still works fine, car drives fine) I didn't have my cell phone so I had to drive back home (not very far) from where the incident happen. 1. Will the insurance still pay because I left the scene? (I wasn't speeding, had my headlights on, and our seatbelts) 2. Will my insurance rates go up? (The damage [b][i]can't[/i][/b] be over $2000, so I can just pay that huge bill once, but that higher insurance will haunt me forever) 3. Will this go on my driving record? (The car is still very drivable and neither me nor my passenger were injured in any way). (I did not get a police report, at least not yet)""

Health Insurance?

What is the best affordable health insurance for a low income middle age woman in Southern CA?

Daily car insurance for a 18 year old?

Hi, I don't really know where to look, but my friend said that it is possible to get daily insurance for my age... I guess the question is where can I get daily insurance that allow 18+ If it helps, the car is a bmw 5 series m sport.""

Mazda rx8 or 350z insurance ?

Id assume the 8 might have cheaper insurance to certain companies due to it having four doors lol But my question is I'm 19 and been looking at progressive and I have to pay $1200 every 6 months for one of these cars! I have a clean record and took the safety course too. Now if I was under my parent's insurance would that be possibly cheaper? Were doing that with the lexus I'm driving right now (theirs) but I need to build credit and whatnot... no need to worry bout college cause its paid off

Car insurance quotes?

About how much would car insurance cost for 16 year old teenage driver in florida. The car would possibly be a 2005 convertible.

""Does my auto insurance cover anyone driving, if they have no insurance themselves? thanks?""

Does my auto insurance cover anyone driving, if they have no insurance themselves? thanks?""

Estimated insurance cost for this car UK?

hi im 17, just about to take my test and it looks like this will be my first car. what do you think the insurance will be on it. i know it will be high but i just wondered how high haha. can you ask for a quote if you don't own the car and haven't passed yet? ie a generalised quote i live in a very good area with off road parking and garage.""

How much does insurance cost for a gas station in NH?

If I was to open up a gas station in NH how much would the insurance cost per month or year? Assuming I had an average amount of coverage and was running it as an LLC.

Does anyone or has anyone ever used California Casualty Insurance?

Im getting off of my dads plan but its really difficult to find a cheap one and Im a teacher with no strikes, tickets or anything. I get these notices in the mail for California Casualty but Im hesitant, what do they cover? Are they any good? Whats your experience?""

Which rental car company has the lowest insurance prices (LDW)?

How do you get car insurance if you dont have a car?

Wouldn't the PPAC (Obamacare) bankrupt insurance companies?

PPAC seems very similar in nature to the Community Reinvestment Act that played a role in the 2008 financial crisis. The PPAC requires insurers to offer the same premium (price fixing) to all applicants of the same age and geographical location without regard to most pre-existing conditions (excluding tobacco use). It also states that minimum standards for health insurance policies are to be established and annual and lifetime coverage caps will be banned. As a business owner, I don't see where the government comes to the conclusion that insurance companies could survive the price fixing and taking on such high risk liabilities. It seems like 2008 all over again, does it not? Wouldn't they get involved in something similar to what the banks did with derivatives since they were forced to take on high risk loans? It seems like the big focus on Obamacare is the part where people are forced to buy insurance. I don't think that is a big issue, the big issue is how can the insurance companies handle this? Am I wrong? I am going to do more research tonight.""

""Car accident, insurance coverage, process?""

I had an accident with another car on the highway, road condition was icy. I traveled with 46-50 miles/hour, kept the car in my lane, followed the cars with normal distance. The other car - one lane or two lanes to the right of me hit an icy spot and crashed into the right side of my car at the door and partially the right fender. I had no damage in the front side of my car, but the front of the other car is damaged substantially. First she admitted that she hit an icy spot, but gave the police another untrue statement about the accident. No tickets were issued by the police. We both have full insurance coverage. The damages on both cars clearly indicates, that her spinning car caused the crash. I already contacted my insurance company. Is there a chance that the insurance companies will be able to work this out and her insurance company will pay for the repair on both cars? Therefore, I will not have to pay my deductible amount? Can the ins. co. override her statement if the independent investigation indicates that her car caused the accident ? Thanks for your answer.""

Which is the most inexpensive car insurance in california? please give me 2 or 3 names. cheapest car insurance?

How can I get antidepressants without insurance?

Is it possible to get them through the hospital or a clinic? Or do I need to have a family doctor or GP I'm 18 and have no insurance **I am not a junkie either

""Please tell me the difference between insure , assure , and ensure . Thank you""

Please tell me the difference between insure , assure , and ensure . Thank you""

I really need some good advice for travel insurance please?

Going to thailand and possibly france or spain to for 1 year. Wats good and why?

How much does the car really influence the insurance premium?

I never had an accident, or points on my license. Would my insurance really go up if i were to trade a beetle in for a convertible eclipse (used, an 03)? I've always heard the sporty the car the higher the insurance, but is that true?""

Where do i get health insurance in texas. im 18?

18 year old male. Parents dropped me. Sad day:(. Haha so where would I find cheap good health insurance :)

My son wants to buy a car. Can he use my car insurance?

My son wants to buy a car but he is only listed as a household driver on my insurance policy. He is 23 years old. He lives with me in Pennsylvania. Must he have his own insurance to purchase a car?

Where can I get health insurance for an affordable price (out of pocket expense)?

I don't have any health and dental insurance. I would like to get one. Where can I get it at an affordable price? or which company is the best to get it from?

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https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/should-people-forced-buy-health-insurance-michael-fox/"

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What costs do you need to think about if you are thinking of buying a couple of narrow boats and renting them

"What costs do you need to think about if you are thinking of buying a couple of narrow boats and renting them

what insurances, fees, maintenance costs etc do i need to be aware of. Thanks

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolutions.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr

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i need a V8 powered car, must have at least 200 horsepower for college. the speed limit is 30 mph and everyone goes 50-60 mph and there are no cops ever catching speeders and people ...show more""

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My car insurance is 2,200 a year and my parents are looking for something cheap. We have state farm. Any suggestions?""

600cc sports bike good for a beginner? gsxr600 or zx6r?

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How much would the cost of my father's car insurance increase if I became a young named driver?

I'm currently 19, approaching 20 and haven't started my lessons yet. It has been arranged that if and when I pass I will be put on as a additional named driver on his insurance. He must have a significant no claims bonus and the car is about 6 years old. The car would not be considered sporty/powerful. I know you can't give me an exact number but if anyone has gone through this how much did your premiums increase by? And/or on a percentage scale how much this would likely increase.""

Car Insurance in CA with AZ vehicle?

Ok so I have a multi part question. My dad is about to get his car reposed. He lives in Phoenix AZ and obviously bought the car there. Its not under his name yet cause hes still paying for it. So he wants me to take over the payments and give me the car. I live in Los Angeles. So my question is, can I get insurance here in Cali even though its a AZ car and its still under the peoples name? If not, he can get insurance there. Also, isn't there a period of time an out of state car can be here being out off state still? What should I do? I don't want to get all sorts of fines or tickets. Thanks in advance""

Car accident in dad's car. What will the insurance cover? Should I get a lawyer?

I was involved in a 3 car accident. The car behind me hit me twice (once on the back right and once on the side as he swerved and lost control) causing me to hit the car in front of me. I was driving my dad's car for the summer because I'm doing an internship away from home. Since my dad's car is useless now, I needed to get a rental car. I would also like to get some medical expenses covered because I am experiencing back and neck pain. My questions are: Will the other person's insurance cover the cost of the rental car although the car is not mine but I am the one using it for the summer? And should I get a lawyer to handle this situation? (Also, my dad is 8 hours away from here and the car is still in the tow lot since I am staying at an extended stay hotel and have no where to keep the car.)""

Good 2 go auto insurance?

Who has this insurance? Whats ur take on it and whats the cheapest price do they offer?

Expired insurance of another driver?

While I was slowing behind a stopping car, another vehicle hit me at the rear bumper. My bumper would probably have to be replaced. We have exchanged insurances and continued. Now that I check his insurance, it's expired. I have his driver license details as well. I will call his insurance company, but if it really turns out to be expired and he was uninsured - what are the options?""

What costs do you need to think about if you are thinking of buying a couple of narrow boats and renting them

what insurances, fees, maintenance costs etc do i need to be aware of. Thanks

If i put a big engine in my small car will my insurance still be low?

i have a ford fiesta zetec 1.25, if i put a rs cosworth engine in it will it how much will it affect the insurance? i've been on gocompare.com and it give an option standard engine replacement . i have ticked it and the price has gone up from 682 to 1049. does this mean i can put any engine in my car and the insurance will be 1049?""

Uninsured Motorcycle Driver Question?

Recently a friend of mine wanted to purchase a motorcycle that he found a super great deal on. Because his credit is very average he asked me to purchase the cycle and he would make me payments plus interest. I agreed and took out a loan for the bike. However a few weeks later he decided it would be ok to take the bike out for a spin UNINSURED. He had a run in with several trick or treaters and their parents. Since it was an unlit road, they were in the middle, and he was going under the speed limit. The cops ruled it not his fault. However now two insurance companies are coming after me to subrogate the liabilities. Since he was the driver but I am the owner. What are my rights? Can they still blame him? Am I liable?""

Motorcycle insurance question?

I want to get a Yamaha V Star 250 when I turn 20. What would be the average loading percentage for 20 year old with a 250cc bike and a clean driving record? Also will I need third party and third party fire and theft or is it optional??? And what would the NCD% (no-claim discount) be????

Car insurance if I don't drive?

My mom is taking me off of her car insurance policy since I no longer own a car, don't have a job to get one or pay gas, and don't even live with her anymore. Yesterday I got my drivers license address changed to my current address which is with my boyfriend. Now his family is making a big deal about it saying that even if I'm not driving, it's illigal to have a licensed driver living in their house with no car insurance and that I have to be under insuarance. This dosnt make any sense to me. Is it even true or are they misinformed? Please help!!!""

Life insurance with gerber life?

hey everybody...im thinking of taking life insurance with gerber life..im getting a lot of pish posh from the company, they seem to be circumventing my questions....im curious has anybody ever filed a claim with them regarding the passing of a loved one, or tried to make a claim with them? my dad...god rest his soul tried to get a life insurance policy claimed when his sister passed on, he was beneficary,,and i remember they gave him a hard time about the policy...if you can suggest a life insurance co you have id be intrested....serious answears only please""

If my auto insurance cancel how much grace period is there after the due date?

Do you have life insurance?

Affordable health insurance?

I'm nineteen years old and I don't have health insurance. I'm going to be a college student in the fall. I was wondering if anyone had any idea how I could find good, affordable health insurance? Also some help as to how the whole co-pay thing works would help out, too. I used to have a certain health insurance for people from low-income families but they just cut mine off so I need to get some. Thanks in advance!""

What are the variables included in the cost of car insurance?

What are the BASIC variables that are included in any car insurance? i.e...car color, car make, type of car, horsepower, year, age of driver, ethnicity...? Which things do they look at car wise/and driver wise that affect how much insurance you end up paying in the end? and does the speed of the car effect the cost greatly?""

Best/cheapest car insurance for new 20-something year old New York driver?

20-something New York driver - I need car insurance. If I get insured here, it's bound to be THOUSANDS (probably around 5) :( Who do you suggest I go with? How's esurance?""

Question about getting a car insurance quote?

If I go to say, State-Farm's website and get a quote. They need information like my specific address. I'm new to this, why do they need phone numbers or addresses? Am I going to receive spam mail from them or something? I know where I live affects my car insurance, but a specific address.. I'm just lost. Thanks""

A car insurance company that will take me with many tickets?

I am looking around for the cheapest car insurance in state of NJ and have at least 5 tickets within the last 5 years...what car insurance company will take me for the best premium...thanx

What auto insurance company will give me a good price after lapsing insurance?

I had geico and my insurance lapsed. Everyone wants so much money now since i lapsed previously. Ive tried all the major companies. Does anyvody know of a cheap insurance that i can look into? Right now everyone wants around 7-800$ for 4 cars liability. Rediculous.

Can I get an auto insurance policy for rental cars only?

I often rent cars and end up paying insurance. My credit card covers collision damage waiver (CDW) but not liability, which is required by law in states like California. Is there a policy I can get from an auto insurance company that will give me liability for a good price? I'm tired of paying $10/day for something I never end up using.""

How can I find affordable health insurance in Florida?

AAA vs. Farmers for home and auto insurance?

I'm looking to get a combined homeowners and auto insurance policy. Right now, the package that Farmers is offering based on my specs is 10% cheaper than AAA's. Any thoughts? Thanks!""

How do you pay an insurance deductible?

Well i sadly wrecked my car today i have full coverage because i have a loan from a bank and im still making payments on it. I let the insurance company know. But my deductible is $1,000.00 and i dont have a thousand dollars. Can you like make cheap payments on that or do you need it all upfront? Or do i not have to pay it right away?""

Insurance cost for a 2001 Range Rover?

What would the annual cost be to insure a smart teenager on a 2001 range rover hse? just a ballpark works... Thanks

How much will insurance go up for a 17 yr old female with 6 months driving experience in an accident?

Accident was her fault. She rear ended a truck. The truck wasnt hurt at all but the car was totaled pretty much. Ticket was failure to reduce speed to avoid an accident. What is a rough estimate of how much insurance will go up for her?

Is it wise to go on your parents car insurance?

Having looked around on car insurance website and seeing that my insurance would be as high as 2500, is it wise to go on my parents insurance. If they are the main driver and im the additional driver it comes down to just 1000. Is this illegal and what are the chances of getting caught if so? thanks x""

What is a good cheap car for a 17year old? I want cheap insurance as well.?

I have recent started driving lessons and I want to buy a car. I only earn 30 a day tho.

Which type of insurance do I have?

I have AvMed insurance through my job and I am filling out paperwork online right now and I am not sure which type to choose: Primary Secondary Supplementary Worker's Comp It says Open Access-Self Refer to Specialist at the top of my insurance card. Could someone help me out please?

What size alloy wheels will change the insurance of a car? (read details)?

right i've been looking at cars to buy for ages now and as I'm a seventeen year old boy insurance is ridiculous as it is. Finding cars that i can afford to buy and insure is hard. I have found a few 'perfect' cars, however a couple of them have alloy wheels instead of the standard manufacture ones. I will quote my insurance website so you can help me out: Replacement of factory fitted wheels with Alloys of the same size this doesn't alter my insurance quote one bit. Replacement of factory fitted wheels with wheels / tyres of a non standard size or specification This means i cannot get insured at all; they won't have me with them. So my question is, if a 1998 Peugeot 306 has 16 inch white wolfrace alloys, does this mean i can't get insured or not? This might be a stupid question, just want to get it right, thanks for you time, means a lot Alex.""

AAA car insurance question?

I've been with State Farm since the 1970's, but am a member of AAA. I was going to take my State Farm papers down to the AAA office and see if they could give me a better rate. My question is, does anyone have any experience with AAA car insurance? Good or bad, I'd like to hear about it.""

5 Day Hold On Insurance Claim Check?

I got my insurance claim check from the USPS [Postal Service] & I Signed The Check Over To My Friend For i Could Use Her Credit Card She Went Into Our Credit Union And They Told Her It Would Be On A 5 Day Hold Which Made no Sense Since All The Security Features On The Checks Are Easy To Verify By Looking At It...Is There A Reason They Put A hold On It?

What costs do you need to think about if you are thinking of buying a couple of narrow boats and renting them

what insurances, fees, maintenance costs etc do i need to be aware of. Thanks

Where can I find affordable health insurance in the state of New York?

Car insurance for a young driver?

I Live in NSW Australia and I am getting a car for my 16th birthday..I will also only be on my lurners permits (L Plates). I was thinking about getting a 4 scylinder 80s modle celica. but I have been told because its a 2 door sports car the insurance will be verry high for someone who is 16. is this true..and are there any things I realy should know?

My job took me off the schedule because im pregnant?

im 4 months pregnant . and have very hight risk pregnancy. and mt job requer havey lefting . so my i get a doctor note that i cant left more than 8 pounds, my job put me on leave off absents without telling me. i talk to my HR and they told me i can apply for short term disability now than maternity leave when i have the {babies} my question it I have my insurance thought liberty mutual . would i be approved? if now what to do i cant Afford to not get paid?""

Which car is better to own?

as insurance and teenage point should i buy new one or lease it i am first time dirver which insurance should be cheaper for me looking bargian here

Insurance For A 18 Year old (super car)?

I'm 18 Years old and My great uncle passed away leaving me with ALOT of money Ive decided I want to get a 2002 Lamborghini Murcielago Ive gotten a great deal on one for 95k Could somebody please tell me what the insurance cost would be I live in Florida and would not use this as my primary Vehicle but would use it non the less Please don't be rude or sarcastic I realize I didn't earn this money and I'm not buying it to show off Its just been a car Ive dreamed of owning since i was 9 Being that this isn't a newer Lamborghini that cost hundreds of thousands how much would you say the insurance would cost and who would be the best to go with?

Why does CAR INSURANCE cost more when a CAR/ motor vehicle is PAINTED RED?

Why does the color red coast more to insure ?

Insurance cost for a 16 year old with a 1986 iroc camaro?

I'm 16 have a 1986 iroc camaro 350ci and i live in an average neighborhood in western ny i'm a male. any insurance guestimates? I'm gonna need to be on my own plan.

What is the best car insurance?

What is the cheapest and best car insurance out there. im 18.

Mustang GT Insurance?

I am now 15 and 9 months and when i turn 16 and 9 months around May next year i would like to get a new 2015 Mustang GT for 32k. There is a problem. My mom is worried about how much she will have to pay for insurance so i would like to get an estimate from you guys before asking her to call the insurance company. By the way we are from Poland( I am first generation born in New York Brooklyn now in Maryland). I was thinking maybe she could just tell the insurance company she is buying a second car for herself to maybe keep the insurance company from knowing its for a 16 year old they wont be able to trust.(Even though i have been driving my Mom's Camry for a few years now and am beyond responsible enough.) I was hoping below a 100$/month? (P.S. She is very responsible and had never been in an accident caused by her fault so her insurance company trusts her and i believe she is with Erie Insurance now after she switched from Geico who were overcharging her for the house coverage i believe...)

Do you have to have car insurance to get a Florida drivers license?

I'm 16 and about to travel to Florida and currently dont have a license. Do I have to have proof of insurance before I am able to get my teen restricted drivers license down there?

Being stopped by police for no car insurance?

I was pulled over by the police today for having no insurance, I did have fully comp on another car (which I have no sold) but was advised by the insurance that I can drive ther cars (but was not told that had to belong to someone else) I am now being charged with no insurance and I have had a clean licence for over 10 years. Is there anything I can do or will I just put this down to experience""

Can new auto insurance company find an incident not reported with DMV but claimed with current insurance comp?

HOW does indemnity insurance affect Home insurance?

How does having indemnity insurance on a home for buiding work carried out with out building regs affect the cost of Home building insurance?

Cheapest auto insurance with good coverage?

i need help finding good cheap autp insurance...

How much will it cost me to insure monthly a Porsche Boxster 2.5 2dr Roadster 1998.?

Saw a very good one, will like to have an idea of how much it'll cost me before i dive in. Thank you.""

Insurance companies will have 32 million new customers because of Obamacare. How is this socialism?

The Affordable Care Act was modeled after a Republican health care plan by the Heritage Foundation and was first implemented by a Republican governor. All this bill does is makes sure that insurance companies have 32 million new customers. I could understand if you called Single Payer socialism (which I highly support), but calling Obamacare socialist is pretty stupid.""

Would insurance be higher on suv/truck or car/sedan?

For example Mitsubishi Montero Sport vs Volkswagen passat, Nissan maxima, or Mitsubishi galant.""

Is there a group health insurance I can join?

My husband left his job and we lost our health insurance. Are there organizations I can join to become part of their group health insurance? Who are they? I know I can buy health insurance any time but I can generally get it cheaper as a group insurance.

Cheapest car insurance uk desperate!?

im 17 and just passed my test and i have a citreon saxo sx 1.4. my parents dont drive so i cant get insured on their name so i know its going to cos me a fair amount. ive tried looking on all the search engines such as confused but the prices are so expensive! does anyone know any individual companies that are really cheap, i really am desperate!! lol, thanks.""

""Hello , I have a car in my wifes name ...but the car insurance is in my name can i get it licensed?

Can i get it licensed in kentucky ...while it is in her name? ..she doesn't drive ..i have the insurance on the car in my name..etc .

Can my friend insure my car?

I bought a car and currently have a loan for it that I'm paying off. The insurance that I got for my car is $250 which is way too much. My friend pays $100 for his insurance. If I were to be put on my friends policy, it would make his insurance go up to $200, but I would pay him $120, and he would pay $80, making insurance cheaper for the both of us. Is this legal? Note that he is listed as the policy holder, but I am listed as the primary driver of the car.""

What is the cost of general liability insurance for park rental?

need the insurance to cover a softball tournament

I need health insurance?

i am a student in college from the ages of 18-26 looking for a affordable health insurance..

How much would insurance cost for a 2011 mustang v6?

I am 18 years old, I currently have an 03 Tacoma 4 door Prerunner and my current insurance rate is around $210 a month. I live in Louisiana, I average around a 3.0 GPA and I have saved up and I am really close to owning a 2011 mustang and I was curious if someone could give me an estimate on around how much the insurance might cost. Thanks""

Car insurance rates in Ontario for new driver?

I plan to import my '01 Camry from USA to missisuaga. How much shd I expect to pay p.m. in car Insurance rates ? I have 3 yrs clean driving history in USA.Will my driving history in USA help with getting a better rate in canada ? Initially I will have only a US drivers license.Pls help shed light on my doubts ..

What costs do you need to think about if you are thinking of buying a couple of narrow boats and renting them

what insurances, fees, maintenance costs etc do i need to be aware of. Thanks

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-much-insurance-genesis-coupe-bennett-sly"

0 notes

beefybrit-blog · 7 years

Text

Day 1

As I sit here lying on my sofa, waiting for the fast food to come, the events of the past few days have affected me greatly. Last night I went and saw a music school perform as my girlfriend was in it with a group of people. She is a great drummer, having come from nothing to being able to keep a beat for half a dozen songs from memory in about 6 months. Between the ages of 12 and 15 I was an avid Drama enthusiast, my love for music, drama and public performing has never really left me. I always get a tingle before they roll out on stage to do their thing.

As I sat there watching in-between sets, I saw the stage floor. It’s a soft rubber matting that doesn’t reflect light and is extremely grippy. I remember what it felt like to be on that, especially in just socks. You felt glued to the ground, your every step slightly cushioned by the rubber absorbing your energy. Felt good.

Food just came, my Mrs is off to see her family this weekend so we had a ‘goodbye’ meal of ‘Tost’ which, since I’m in Turkey right now, means ‘Toast’. It’s basically a toastie with extra shit inside like Salad and stuff, well see for yourself.

Not good for you, but tasty. Anyway, I decided last night that once my girlfriend had left that I would fly right. Before I came down from 160kg to 100kg. I then put back on 25kg, since I hit my goal, I lost the track. I was so focused and disciplined, I even lost weight on a 10-day holiday. But I lost it all. I want that back. I figure the best way to do that is to set myself another goal.

I originally set 100kg as a goal, because at 160kg I thought to myself ‘No Fucking Way Can I Ever Get there’ I went past it and got to about 98kg. It’s weird, I’ve never actually written it down, seeing it go from 3 digits into 2 is a strange thing.

So I’m starting at 125kg and here is me. Anon. I am going to sign myself up for a bodybuilding physique competition next year (2018) so I have a goal. Having a structure, like I did before, will enable me to remain focused and concentrate. I believe I have what it takes this time. I’m ready to make a go of it.

I’d managed to Vlog most of my transformation, but keeping up with a daily vlog, I realised that my life as it was, was way too boring to vlog about once a week. I would set myself unrealistic goals and ambitions. And never ever keep to them. I figured that writing my thoughts down and just spilling onto a keyboard might be a better way of tracking it, including photos of highlights, rather than trying to maintain a ‘WHATS UP GUYS THIS IS JOEY SALADS’ kind of personality that YouTube content is driven by.

I can’t blame YouTube, but I do feel as though I’m not ready to continue my Vlogs, since I’m down in the dumps about this whole weight gain thing. Once I’m back on track, I’ll try to transition into doing both. I’m sure at least 100 Blogs a day are started about ‘This is my first day’ and I’d wager that 90% of them fail in the first few weeks. I’m going to try to succeed in keeping up with these entries once or twice a week, some might be shorter and some might be longer.

I’d say that my knowledge of Diet, Fitness and Nutrition rivals about 80% of the publics, that’s not to say I know everything, it’s to say the public are massively ill-informed about both, I’ve read the books, watched the videos and asked the right questions. So I will be making the correct choices in that respect. One of my friends, who I met at the gym, offered me the advise of not eating carbohydrates after 5 o’clock. He is very lean and looks great, but I didn’t even bother explaining the logic flaw to him.

Him, like many others, look for that ‘1 Method’ of doing something. If I stop eating this I’ll lose weight, if I don’t drink that I’ll lose weight. And sometimes it works, but not for the reasons they think. These methods/theories/techniques often work because these people radically change several things at once and they see results, however, they tend to glorify the catalyst that started it all i.e. not eating carbs after 5.

The best diet is one you will stick to, the body responds to consistent changes over time and doesn’t like flip-flopping between extremes. Moderation is the key, no matter what you say or see, moderation is the key. Sooner or later, those who don’t moderate (like me the first time) eventually burn out.

My first massive weight loss, I completely cut dietary fat out of my diet for a whole year, all I got was the bear minimum from chicken breast and a few eggs and nuts. Not even close to the RDA. You know what happened? My Testosterone, a hormone that uses saturated fat to synthesise crashed. I’m not sure the exact science about what happened, but my body shut down producing testosterone.

I noticed it when I felt so incredibly weak, wasn’t making any gym gains, ZERO sex drive, tired, moody and just feeling off colour. One of my co-workers at the time said I looked anaemic, so pale, weak with bags under my eyes. I knew I wasn’t, since I give blood regularly and they test for iron levels before they take the blood. I ordered a ‘Full body blood test’ off the internet. Why would I do that? Because if you go to the NHS and say, ‘I feel rough’ they will make sure you don’t have anything deadly, which is fine, and then begin a very long process of finding out the rest, sometimes not even doing that. I know a little bit about cars. I spent years fixing up my land rover, I can diagnose what’s wrong with my car these days to a close margin. When I go to the mechanic, I can tell them pretty much exactly what is wrong and what needs replacing. Then, them being the experts, will tell me if there is anything more. I took the same approach with my doctor, I went there with a professional private medical blood test result and showed them.

To their surprise my testosterone, which an acceptable tolerance is between 10nmol/L – 31nmol/L, mine was 1.8nmol/L. The NHS use a different tolerance than this company whose limit is lower, but as you can see below. I was half way to losing my manhood!

After a whole YEAR of tests including an MRI, Ultrasound and several blood tests, they couldn’t find a reason. Doctors can be very ignorant when their patient suggests something like diet. But that’s by-the-by in the end I went for treatment privately since a whole host of NHS incompetence’s left me massively under dosed for 6 months, causing me to feel worse not better. I am now on 500mg of Sustanon a month which I inject into my quad once a week. Lesson for every man, don’t neglect dietary fat.

It took about 6 more months to feel the effect. So a 2 year payment for a stupid mistake. But I started getting my old self back eventually and made gains etc, I even went on to compete in strongman competitions and training. Although I was seriously bad!

So other than that, that’s been my life. Now it’s time to change. Now it’s time to set another goal and stick with it. A goal has to be SMART

Specific Measurable Attainable Realistic Time based

So my smart goal is this:

I want to compete in a bodybuilding physique competition in 2018, although not officially released, the dates tend to stay fairly similar each year. May 26th is my date . I will measure my progress with 3 steps, short term goal, medium and long, the latter being to compete. It is attainable based upon the large timeframe I have given myself and it is also realistic because of that. Time based, meaning I will track myself weekly to gauge my aesthetic appearance and my weight.

I will start with a 16 week ‘Cutting Period’ During this time I will lose 30kg at a rate of 1.8kg per week following a strict diet. I will measure if my progress IRL is matching with my predicted progress and adjust as needed, I will be setting my goal to what I know is safely attainable, through personal experience and research recommendations. Once this 16-week cutting period is over, I have left myself 4 weeks to pick up any slack and make any corrections to the diet, meaning, if I arrive at my goal weight/physique of 90kg and I am still not happy, I have time to continue before moving onto the next step, this should bring me to October 2017.

If I am on course I will begin ‘Lean Bulking’ on a small caloric deficit each day. Until a physique which I believe is presentable has been attained. Since the competition is on May 26th that will give me 6 ½ Months before cutting down 8 – 12 weeks prior to the competition date.

I am aware of the emotional problems, since a member of my family has terminal cancer, they will likely die during this period, I am prepared and won’t let this affect my progress.

I am determined. I am ready for it. I’m not ready to share my social media or anything yet, nor will I be posting pictures on my social media until I am confident enough, this is, after all a mind-game.

Wish me luck buddies.

Love you Bye.

#weightloss #mensphysique #bodybuilding #bodyunderconstruction

0 notes

viralhottopics · 7 years

Text

Can I forgive the man who raped me?

Thordis Elva was raped aged 16. Years later, she emailed Tom Stranger, the man who raped her, beginning a raw, painful healing process documented in their book South of Forgiveness. In this extract, they meet to find a way forward

Thordis Elvais from Iceland and known to Icelandersas a writer, playwright, journalist and public speaker. She was voted Woman of the Year 2015 by the Federation of Icelandic Womens Societies in Reykjavik for her work on gender equality, and has written a celebrated book on gender-based violence, 2009s mannamli (The Plain Truth). She currently resides in Stockholm, Sweden with her partner Vidir and their son.

Tom Stranger is Australian. He met Elva when he was 18 and on a student exchange programme in Iceland, and the pair had a relationship. Since then, he has worked in various sectors (community services, youth, outdoor recreation, charity, construction, and hospitality). For now, he is working as a landscape gardener and lives in Sydney with his wife, Cat.

From: [email protected] Sent: Saturday 21 May 2005, 5.38am To: [email protected] Subject: Words for you Thordis, I dont know where to start. When I saw your name in my inbox, my spine went cold. My memories are still as clear as day. Please believe me when I say I have not forgotten what I did, and how wary I have to be of myself. I dont know how to reply. I want to call myself sick (but I know I am not), I want to say that you are so strong, so strong to be able to write to me and recall the events and my actions. I want to thank you for not hating me, although Id like you to. It would make it easier for me. Without looking for a scratch of sympathy, I want to tell you that the events and emotions I was party to in Iceland have replayed in my head many times, usually when I am by myself for any length of time. They flash past me, vividly accurate, and then, shortly after the denial and positive character reinforcement, comes the question: Who am I? It is a dark part of my memory. Ive tried to suppress it. But this is not about me. Whatever I can do or offer you, I am more than willing. The question is where to go from here. You tell me. Tom.

*****

After eight years of analysing the violent past and its consequences in a written correspondence, Thordis and Tom decide to meet up in the middle, between their home countries of Iceland and Australia, looking to face their past once and for all.

Day one, 27 March 2013

The taxi picks me up at a quarter to five and takes me to the bus station, where Im booked on the fly-bus. The grizzled taxi driver, hoisting my suitcase into the trunk with a smooth manoeuvre, asks me where Im going.

To South Africa.

Oh, really? To Johannesburg?

No, to Cape Town, I reply, still in disbelief at my own words despite the time Ive had to adjust to the idea. It would be an understatement to say that the proposed meeting has been on my mind. Its reverberated in every step when Ive gone out for a run; its been in every breath of cold winter air that scraped the insides of my lungs; its soaked the wet washcloth I used to clean my sons sticky fingers. And Ive tried my best to push it out of my mind when making love to my fiance, enjoying his warm skin against mine.

After all, that would be a highly inappropriate time to be thinking about it.

From the moment the destination was set, I adapted to a new calendar before or after Cape Town. The last time I bought deodorant I automatically deduced that I wouldnt have to buy another one until after Cape Town. Yesterday, when snuggling down with my three-year-old son to do some painting together, spending quality time with him BC momentarily appeased my guilt for leaving him for 10 days to travel halfway across the globe to face a man from the past without any guarantee of the outcome.

Something tells me that parents of young children are not meant to take such foolhardy decisions. Thats the reason I gave up my dreams of parachuting when I fell pregnant with my son. Then again, throwing myself out of an aeroplane at 7,000 feet carries less emotional risk than taking a trip down memory lane with the man who turned my existence upside down. Because it wasnt an unknown lunatic who tore my life apart all those years ago. Who turned down the offer of medical help for me, even though I was barely conscious and vomiting convulsively. Who decided instead to rape me for two endless hours.

It was my first love.

My mothers eyes flew wide open when I told her that I was travelling alone to South Africa to meet up with the man who raped me when I was 16. She strung together a series of hair-raising worst-case scenarios before letting out a sigh, looking at me with loving reluctance, and adding: But I know its pointless to try to talk you out of things youve set your mind to, dear. Shortly thereafter, my dad interrupted my packing when he dropped by for a coffee. Despite my attempt to break the news to him in the gentlest manner possible, it didnt prevent him from freaking out. He lectured me in a thundering voice about how I was jeopardising my life for an utterly ridiculous idea.

But I have to finish this chapter of my life, I said softly. My cheeks were on fire.

Finish this chapter? he repeated, appalled, and jumped out of his chair. You dont need to travel across the globe to finish anything! This whole idea is a big pretentious drama, thats what it is!

His words hit me right where it hurts.

Youll have no control over anything. Nothing but your thoughts! Nothing else!

What do you mean? I asked, confused. Ill obviously control my actions and whereabouts.

No you wont, dear, he hissed. You cant always. If you could, then that wouldnt have happened.

We both knew what he meant by that, even though weve never talked about the incident that changed everything. In recent years, Ive spoken widely and publicly about my status as a rape survivor (though, until now, never identified the man who raped me) yet my father and I have never discussed that fateful night. He has never asked and Ive always assumed he doesnt want to know.

I sat up straight, aware of my glowing cheeks. If you reduce me to victim and him to perpetrator, I can see how this seems incomprehensible to you. But were much more than that, Dad.

He scoffed loudly before storming out of the kitchen.

I leant against the wall and let the air out of my lungs slowly. Goddamn it. I knew this would be hard, but bloody hell.

My father appeared again in the doorway, pacing up and down with frustration I knew was fuelled by fatherly love. How can you be sure youll finish anything with this nonsense? This may just as easily be the start of something else entirely! The distress in his voice made it sound like a threat.

I sat alone in the silence my father left behind and watched the dust settle. In a way, I think were both right. This trip will surely mark an end to a certain chapter of my life. What sets me apart from my father is my belief that in the next chapter, I wont be the victim any more.

Day two, 28 March 2013

The screen in the seatback in front of me shows a blinking plane over a map. According to the timer, Cape Town is just 29 minutes away. The butterflies in my stomach nose-dive, as the time seems way too limited considering how many questions are left unanswered.

Goddamn it, what if I cant forgive him? Am I ready to let go?

Frustrated, I scroll through the folder on my laptop, searching for something to calm my nerves. I was level-headed enough when I suggested this trip, wasnt I? In an attempt to recover my faith in this risky undertaking, I read through my own proposal:

You may need a lifetime to forgive yourself for what you did to me. That is up to you and you take however long you need, independent of anyone else. I, however, am climbing a different mountain. And I am getting very close to the top. I propose that in six months time, we meet up with the intention of reaching forgiveness, once and for all. In person. It is the only proper way for me to do it, I feel. No letter can ever compare with face-to-face communication. And after all weve been through, I think it is the most dignified and honest way to finish this chapter of our story.

I sound so calm, so fucking reasonable. How is it possible that this was written by the same person now hyperventilating in a plane 30,000ft over South Africa, full of nerve-racking doubt?

Reading through his reply, Im somewhat comforted that he, too, felt conflicted:

Ill admit that I was floored by your request to meet up. Fearful, anxious, cautious, paranoid. You name it, it all came swarming in. But youve asked, and you sound like you are making vital ground towards something very special for yourself. So of course Ill agree to see you. After much thought I do think it will be beneficial, and an opportunity for myself to air face-to-face some long held words and for us both to look to close some doors. I want it for you, Thordis, as you seem strong, open and ready to see me and move forward. I want it for me because Im so very sick of being sick and seeing myself as unlovable, and believe I can move on if I could just look you in the face, own up to it and say Im sorry.

Forgiveness is the only way, I tell myself, because whether or not he deserves my forgiveness, I deserve peace. Because Im doing this for me. My forgiveness is white-hot from the whetstone, and its purpose is to sever the ties, because if I can let this go, once and for all, Im certain that my overall wellbeing will benefit greatly. Self-preservation at its best.

Day four, 30 March 2013

Its seven oclock when we buy ourselves a drink at the hotel bar and sit down by a table facing the garden, readying ourselves for the hard talk. The windowpane clatters loudly, and an endless stream of staff crossing the room distracts me to the point where I give up. What do you say about us finishing this conversation in my room?

He looks at me, shocked. Are you sure? Youre comfortable with that?

Im sure that itll be easier to have this talk if we get proper privacy. Its tough enough as it is.

Tom radiates ever-increasing anxiety as the elevator climbs closer to the 12th floor. Unlike him, my emotions have calmed down.

Almost serene, I step out of the elevator. Theres no turning back now.

He buries his hands in his pockets as I fish my key out of my bag in front of my hotel room. Putting my hand on the doorknob, it morphs into the white plastic door-handle with the keyhole that haunts my dreams. Within me, everything falls silent. Ready? I ask myself.

Without hesitation, I turn the key.

Tom follows me inside my room, takes a look around and smiles nervously. Not bad.

Sit wherever you like. Im going to make some tea.

Thordiss student ID from around the time she met Tom. Photograph: Courtesy of Thordis Elva

He sits down on the edge of the bed while I busy myself with the kettle. From the corner of my eye, I notice him closing his eyes and straightening his back, as if hes steeling himself. When the boiling water hits the teabag at the bottom of the cup, Tom begins the story in a hoarse voice. I wore my golden shirt that evening. I didnt know it was customary to get dressed up for a dance in Iceland, and I didnt have anything fancy. The son of my host family took me to an exclusive store and helped me choose the shirt. I thought it was the peak of cool, at the time. The striped trousers were a present from my host sister.

He accepts the steaming teacup from my hand and stares into it for a moment before continuing. I remember how excited I was when I bought the ticket. I remember that I was with my friends Carlos and Ben when we met you outside the dance. You were pretty drunk when you arrived.

It was the first time Id ever tasted rum, I tell him. I didnt know how to drink alcohol. Nor did I know how to smoke, even though I took a drag from the rolled cigarette you handed me. I just wanted to impress you. And after the ensuing wild cough, I wondered if perhaps that wasnt a cigarette, I remind myself.

I lost you the minute we stepped inside, Tom continues. Carlos and I went straight to the dancefloor. I remember feeling happy and carefree in that sweaty pile of people. Then someone told me you werent well, you were in the ladies.

My mind replays the awful scene from the bathroom stall. The stains on my new dress. My hair wet from hugging the toilet. My fear and wonder as one spasm after the other wrung my body out like a dishrag. The repeated promises that Id neither drink nor smoke again if I were only allowed to survive this night. And finally, the desperate wish for my mom to come save me. I fucked up, Mom. Im sorry.

Tom frowns. I felt it was my duty to go and check on you. So I went in and climbed over the partition, into your cubicle. I held your hair back while you vomited, and I thought I was going to be sick as well. Then you flopped to the ground and lay there, motionless. I remember carrying you out.

He pauses and looks away. Before I have a chance to tell him how grateful I was when he appeared like my mother incarnate to save me from an untimely death on the bathroom floor, he grimaces bitterly. Then I couldnt be bothered to look after you, Thordis. I dumped you on Ben and left you with him. You were slumped on the chairs outside the bathrooms and he stood there, stooped over you, as I went back to the dancefloor.

I look at him in surprise. I thought youd taken me straight home.

He clenches his jaw. My only thought was that this was the only Christmas dance I was going to experience in Iceland. I was selfish and didnt have any concern for you. In the end, I felt guilty that some other guy was looking after my girlfriend. So I scooped you up in my arms and carried you up the stairs, in a foul mood because I had to leave the party.

And the security guards stopped you on the way out because they wanted to call an ambulance for me as I was dangling from your arms, foaming at the mouth. They thought I had alcohol poisoning.

Id forgotten that moment but I dont doubt it, he says in a low voice.

Tom Stranger in 1996, the year he went to Iceland. Photograph: Courtesy of Tom Stranger

I remember that part vividly because for a second there, I thought youd take their advice, I respond, looking down into my cup. That Mom and Dad would get a call from the hospital saying that their 16-year-old daughter was lying there with alcohol poisoning. I imagined being grounded for life.

Id known for three years by then what it is to drink to excess, and Id seen many of my friends at various stages of drunkenness. I just thought you were wasted. I didnt think you were in real danger, he says.

Whatever it was, it had me paralysed and unable to speak. But I heard you loud and clear as you refused the offer of an ambulance, telling the security guards that you knew me and would see me safely home.

He nods, his complexion strangely pale. The taxi was white, I recall. I told the driver your address I remember letting us into your house. But what I dont remember is what I did with you while I struggled to unlock the door.

You draped me across your shoulder while you rummaged round in my bag for the keys.

He raises his eyebrows. Really? Like a sack of potatoes?

I nod.

He swears at himself quietly. And I remember your entrance hall, the shoes on the floor. From memory, past the coat hooks there were some stairs on the left, leading up to the kitchen and your parents area. Your room was through on the right. He stops and swallows.

I remember taking your clothes off.

I remember it too. My gratitude when he removed my vomit-stained dress. My relief at having my feet freed from the high heels. My frustration for not being able to utter a word of thanks. My lack of understanding when he continued to remove my underwear. Why my panties? Why?

My stomach muscles reflexively tighten as I prepare for the blow.

He stands up, moving restlessly, and walks over to the wall opposite the bed. I undressed you completely… He falls silent and hangs his head. The wind howls pitifully outside the window.

Tom begins to cry.

I wish I could tell you why I did it, Thordis.

Did what?

Raped you, he says, quietly.

This is an edited extract from South of Forgiveness by Thordis Elva and Tom Stranger (Scribe Publications, 12.99). To order a copy for 11.04 go to bookshop.theguardian.com or call 0330 333 6846. Thordis Elva and Tom Stranger will be speaking at the Royal Festival Hall as part of the Women of the World festival on 11 March, and at the Bristol Festival of Ideas on 13 March

People were quick to judge I wasnt angry enough: what came next for Thordis and Tom

Standing in stark stage lights, with five cameras directed at me, I recently found myself on a stage, telling an audience of 1,200 how Id been raped when I was 16 years old. Next to me on stage was Tom, who raped me after a dance at our high school. Together, we gave a TED talk that summarised a 20-year long process, whereby Tom shouldered responsibility for his actions and the way they impacted our lives. It was viewed nearly 2m times in the first week and the overwhelming reaction was positive and supportive.

In the talk, I described the violence Tom subjected me to, how I spent years wanting nothing more than to hurt him back, how I found a way to part with the anger that nearly cost me my life, as well as rid myself of blame that I like so many other survivors wrongfully shouldered.

Tom described how he felt deserving of my body that night, without any concern for me, and consequently convinced himself that what he did was sex and not rape. The following nine years were marked by denial, in which he did his best to outrun the past, until I confronted him in a pivotal email that changed our lives for ever.

Ive been asked why I didnt press charges immediately, and the simple answer to that question is that I was a 16-year-old girl with naive notions about rape. Rapes were committed by armed lunatics, the kind of sensationalised monsters you saw on TV and read about in the papers. The fact that Tom wasnt a monster, but a person who made an awful decision, made it harder for me to see his crime for what it was. That way, the demonisation of perpetrators in mainstream media got in the way of my recovery. By the time I was able to identify what had happened to me as rape, Tom had moved to the other side of the planet, far from the jurisdiction of the Icelandic police. At the time, 70% of rape cases in Iceland were dismissed, even when the perpetrator could be interrogated and the survivor had documented injuries, neither of which were the case for me. Therefore, pressing charges would not have been a fruitful process, and the only option I felt I had left was to bottle up my pain and anger. Studies show that very few survivors have a clean-cut story in which they went straight to the authorities after being assaulted, put the blame squarely on the perpetrators shoulders, healed their wounds and moved on. For most of us, life after violence is a messy ordeal. We dont go to the police because were too confused, scared or doubtful that well get help. We blame ourselves and obsess about things we couldve done differently. We numb ourselves with alcohol/drugs/sex/food/work, or we turn to self-harm to relieve the emotional pain. We continue to see our abusers and pretend that nothing happened, because facing the truth is overwhelming. We develop PTSD and mental illness. We stay silent about what happened out of fear that well not be believed, or worse, blamed for it because we did something wrong. No wonder, really. In reality, the only people capable of preventing rapes are those who commit them, and yet were told from an early age that we can avoid being raped by dressing and behaving in a certain way. This culture of victim-blaming also fosters the idea that there is a right way to react to violence. Had the survivor only worn something else, not smiled so widely, not gotten drunk, fought back (more), screamed (louder), gone straight to the police, not feared their attackers retaliation if theyd only done that, everything wouldve worked out differently. Victim-blaming deepens the shame that many survivors feel and lessens the likelihood that they speak up about their experiences.

youtube

Watch Thordis Elva and Tom Strangers TED talk.

The reality is that there is no right reaction to having your life ripped apart by violence. I knew that my collaboration with Tom would be controversial, and the reactions of internet trolls didnt surprise me. But I am concerned with how quick some people were to judge the wrong way in which I worked through my experience. I wasnt angry enough, I shouldve pressed charges, I was setting a dangerous precedent, I should be ashamed. Although I made it clear that my forgiveness wasnt for my perpetrator but for myself and that without it, I wouldnt be alive, I was still told that I should not have forgiven.

This worries me. I worry about my fellow survivors who are at risk of internalising the misconception that there is a standard reaction to sexual violence, with the conclusion that they didnt react in the right way. To you, I want to say that you did nothing wrong. The way in which you carried on with your life may not have been clean-cut, it may have been messy and incomprehensible to those who dont share your experience, but it was your way to survive a trauma. Nobody has the right to tell you how to handle your deepest pain.

And as the title of our story South of Forgiveness suggests, forgiveness played a pivotal role in allowing me to let go of the self-blame I shouldered, largely due to the victim-blaming culture I grew up in. And yet, forgiveness is not the core of our story, in my mind. The core issue is responsibility.

I understand those who feel discomfort and even outrage when hearing and seeing Tom on stage, knowing that hes perpetrated sexual violence. At the same time, given how prevalent this type of abuse is and how under-reported a crime it is, were in all likelihood seeing and hearing from perpetrators on a daily basis the main difference being that we dont know theyre perpetrators. They could be the people we went to school with, who greet us at the grocery store, who direct the films we watch, get elected to public office, run entire countries and live right next door. Given the low reporting and conviction rate, most of them will never have to take responsibility for their actions in an institutional sense. This does not lessen the gravity of their deeds.

By the time Tom had confessed to his crime, he couldnt have done time for it even if he wanted to, as the statute of limitations had passed. As a result, our case fell through the cracks of the legal system, like so many others, but it didnt lessen our need to analyse our past and place the responsibility with the person to whom it belonged: Tom. We also did our best to answer questions that are rarely posed in the public discourse about rape, where more focus seems to be on the survivors attire, behaviour, whereabouts and sexual history than the perpetrators culpability. And as frustrating as it is, I understand it to a certain extent. Because in the public discourse, the only people speaking about the violence theyve been party to are the survivors, usually. Which is why we only have their stories to dissect, their details to scrutinise. Did she say shed been drinking that night? This tradition of one-sided scrutiny blindsides us from looking at the behaviour of the person responsible, the perpetrator, to whom the focus needs to shift.

I am not sharing the story of how I processed the abuse I endured as a set of recommendations for others.

My story is a unique account shared in the hope that it can aid a public discussion about sexual violence.

As a society, it is our duty to fight against violence. And as individuals, we have a right to heal from it.