#listen mystery woman I need a way to train my crocodile

[emperorbirbman]

@regina-tenebris

“Hm. Yes. You’ve been alive a long time haven’t you?” It was unclear how he knew that. Perhaps all centuries old beings had some kind of old person radar or something. 

“Well, anyway, welcome to Shurima, strangely dressed barbarian. Try not to make any trouble, one of my subordinates seems to have taken a liking to human flesh in my absence. Really, if you know any methods to train a crocodile, I would love to hear them. I assume that’s something you barbarians do; the last time I tried to serve one to some other barbarians they seemed to think I was crazy. Really, you would think they would know culture when they saw it.” 

#listen mystery woman I need a way to train my crocodile

[bywordofaphrodite]

Book Reviews 3&4: Nancy Drew and the Lilac Inn by Carolyn Keene & Trixie Belden and the Secret of the Mansion by Julie Campbell Tatham

This review’s theme is girl detective books ! Audience age range: roughly 12 and up !

Just as Enid Blyton’s books made me fall in love with magical creatures and faraway lands, detective novels became an obsession during late primary school, with classic lead female characters Nancy Drew and Trixie Belden being my absolute favourites. My school had an extremely small and limited library, and the Nancy Drew books were one of the only decent series there- even with a great chunk of the collection missing. My mother introduced me to Trixie Belden, which she insisted was better than Nancy Drew, though I refused to listen to such a declaration at the time.

Now, though? My opinions have definitely changed.

Nostalgic review

Rating: ★★★★★

From memory, Nancy Drew is a clever, beautiful and well-off girl in her late teens, living with her lawyer father Carson Drew and her housekeeper Hannah Gruen, who has looked after Nancy since her mother’s passing when she was only three. I always enjoyed the dynamic between Nancy and her father, as it was similar to mine with my father, also a lawyer- Carson doesn’t step in unless Nancy needs his help, but he does assist in legal advice when necessary. I also loved Nancy’s friendship with the cousins Bess and George, and liked that her relationship with her ‘special friend’ Ned never got in the way of solving mysteries or hanging out with her friends (‘hanging out’ was practically code for sleuthing in these novels anyway). Overall, my memories of this series amount mostly to exciting searches for missing heiresses, finding beautiful jewels and battling crocodiles in Florida.

On the opposite side of the spectrum is Trixie Belden- rough-around-the-edges thirteen year-old from a poor family living with both her parents and three brothers. Where Nancy has a housekeeper, lives in an affluent suburban neighbourhood and never wants for money, Trixie lives on the outskirts of a small town, both her parents work, and she is constantly reminded of how important it is to work for money as they do not have much of it to spare on mindless things. Nancy is a fairly solitary character, often working alone unless her friends show up, and even then she does most of the legwork; Trixie is also the main sleuth in her series, but her best friend Honey is almost always at her side. While the mysteries were great, the warm friendships in Trixie Belden novels are what I remember best.

Regardless of whatever my thoughts may be after rereading books from these two series, I’ve never ceased referencing either of them and my love of the mystery genre still holds fast even now.

Nancy Drew and the Lilac Inn Review

Post-read: ★★

Synopsis: girl detective Nancy Drew is called to solve a series of odd goings on at her newly engaged friend Emily’s inn, in what seems to be an attempt to prevent Emily and her fiancé from opening. Disaster strikes when her aunt retrieves Emily’s inheritance of diamonds- Emily’s last hope to cover the costs of fixing up the inn- and they are swiftly stolen within the hour. Nancy vows to catch the thief and the intruder and save Emily’s inn from failure.

I struggled in choosing which Nancy Drew book to reread for this review, and after reading through multiple rankings lists I decided on the Lilac Inn because it ranked highly on every list. I now wish I had just gone with Crocodile Island anyway… at least there was something snappy about it. In between the bomb, the theft, the doppelganger, the underwater fake-shark, the kidnapping, the spear-gun attack- I think I’ve made my point. There’s far too much going on, and if it was well-written I would be okay with it, really I would, but it’s all so blandly articulated that half the time I had to reread just to make sure I’d read correctly what nonsense was occurring at any given time.

Straight out the gate, I just want to say how shocking the writing was- that’s shockingly bad, by the way. If I thought Enid Blyton’s work was stunted, well, this was far, far worse. Especially since it lacks the excuse of being written for young children. It was incredibly difficult to push through in the slower parts, and I must admit I basically skim-read the lead up parts to the action sequences (which were incredibly minimal compared to the gnashing crocodile teeth I longed for, but alas). Sadly for me, Bess (my old fave), George and Ned were not present at all, and I cannot remember if they had actually been introduced that early in the series because they are not mentioned once.

I did really like the concept of the story, and the element of Nancy having a creepy doppelganger posing as Nancy to cause mischief (she has several over the series) was fun, even more so that said doppelganger was an actual actress and quite ruthless in her attempts to steal Emily’s diamonds- I love a morally-corrupt pretty female villain as much as the next person, after all. There is a romance teased between Nancy and a young man staying at the inn, a young man who continuously seems to be in the same room as the diamond thief messing with Emily’s inn, but ultimately both never amount to anything. This hardly surprised me given the book is written in the thirties, and Ned and Nancy never do anything but attend dances together the entire series, but still, come on. He could’ve at least stolen the diamonds to add some spice to his useless appearances.

It’s possible that were a very talented scriptwriter to take this book and make it into a movie it could work out a lot better than it does on paper- provided the casting was done well. The sets would be interesting, and I think the creepiness of the ‘ghost’ in the orchard and the diving scenes would translate a lot better on camera. Normally I’m not one to nominate live actions of novels for no reason, but this thought kept recurring as I struggled to get through the writing.

Characters who aged well: Nancy is smart and weirdly good at everything (they don’t explain why she knows how to do all the things she does, but diving and freeing herself from bonds seems to be easy enough for her. Given male characters are always allowed to be perfect without training, I’ll allow it). For a female character written in the 30s she has plenty of agency and does not once rely on a man’s help to do anything, which is why I always enjoyed her books. Carson Drew also aged well- not present that often, but useful without being interfering, and his trust in his daughter is refreshing. As for the other main characters in the series… they didn’t even show up in this book so I can’t really comment on this.

Characters who aged badly: plot twist- I’m adding Nancy here too. She is a little too perfect, too polished, a common criticism by modern readers, though at the time of publication was her main selling point. Additionally, earlier editions of the series featured racist comments made by Nancy, although those have since been taken out. However, the publisher and creator of the first books was not a very pleasant person, so I find myself able to separate that from Nancy’s character.

Favourite scene/quote: ‘The article went on to tell that Nancy had just completed a course in advanced skin diving in the Muskoka River, and that she had finished first in total points in the twenty student group’.

I find this quote amusing because there is really no need for Nancy to be good at every single thing, and this is a good example of the many times throughout the series that Nancy is the ‘best’ at a very random activity that is often never mentioned again.

As for my favourite scene, though nothing interesting actually ends up happening in the orchard, I did like the eerie setting of Nancy dressing up as a ghost and chilling behind a tree for a while (okay it was partially eerie, mostly just oddly comedic). The actress/impostor posing as Nancy provided a few good scenes, too, but for the main villain of the story she was hardly in as many scenes as she should’ve been in.

After doing some research, I discovered something most interesting: Nancy was written with significantly more character by the original ghost-writer of the series, a woman named Mildred Wirt Benson, who wrote Nancy ‘embodying qualities that she wished she had’- but the publisher Edward Stratemeyer did not want a bold female character, and she was rewritten with similar dialogue but now accompanied with ‘dainty’ verbs to sweeten her words. Stratemeyer was also known for his beliefs that women belonged in the kitchen, and the only reason he created Nancy in the first place was to capitalise on young female readers who wanted their own equivalent of the Hardy Boys.

With all of this in mind, it’s very possible that the Nancy from my memories is a mix of the older and new editions, which allowed Nancy more personality as the series went on, no longer needing to confirm to the sexist expectations of the 1930s. And despite these origins, Nancy Drew aged quite well as an unintended feminist icon: she solves her mysteries alone and rarely needs Ned’s help at all; in fact, most of the time, Nancy is the one doing the saving. It’s nice to think that, almost one hundred years later, Mildred Wirt Benson’s version of Nancy is the one being kept alive, both on paper and onscreen.

Trixie Belden and the Secret of the Mansion Review

Post-read: ★★★★★

Synopsis: energetic teen Trixie Belden’s boring town of Sleepyside is turned upside down when a rich new family moves onto the property opposite her own, an old miser winds up in hospital and his empty mansion is suddenly inhabited by a runaway boy, and a missing fortune is waiting to be uncovered.

Whewww.

This was a massive breath of fresh air after the Lilac Inn! After being so unimpressed by both Blyton and Keene’s writing, Tatham’s writing restored my faith in my childhood judgement. Her words flowed well and the conversation between the characters was very natural. The blank slate characters in the Lilac Inn were showed up by the animated and multiple-dimensional characters in the Secret of the Mansion, and I never once felt the need to rush myself through the chapters.

Unlike my method of choosing a Nancy Drew book, I simply decided on reading the first Trixie book for this review. While I almost went for a later book where all the main characters had been introduced, I couldn’t remember how Trixie first met Honey and Jim, which I felt was pretty important to her character. I’m very glad I did. Even in the first book, Trixie endures so much character development (contrasting very strongly with Nancy’s flawless existence). Longing for a friend, Trixie takes herself up the hill to the newly habited mansion to introduce herself and her little brother Bobby, who she is babysitting to earn money to buy herself a horse. There she meets rich girl Honey Wheeler, a sickly and sheltered but sweet girl of the same age, whose parents pay little attention to her. Things fall into place with all the expected luck of a teen heroine- Honey’s governess is a lovely woman who wants Honey to befriend Trixie and offers to look after Bobby, and of course Honey’s stables are now filled with horses and a stable hand who can teach her to ride.

But for every easy thing comes an opportunity for Trixie to grow: she comes to admire Honey’s bravery after previously being irritated by her fear of trying outdoor activities; she ignores the stable hand’s orders not to ride the stallion and falls as a result, leading to her having to work to regain his trust and also being taught the valuable lesson to recognise her own limits; finally, as much as Trixie hates looking after little Bobby, when he is bitten by a snake Trixie is resourceful and quick on her feet in helping him, keeping him well enough until a doctor and other adults arrive.

Rather like the Lilac Inn, the mystery of the story centres on the hidden will to a supposed fortune of the elderly man who lived in the old mansion not far from Honey’s new home. On a whim, Trixie nags Honey into accompanying her to snoop around the building, leading to their discovery of the old man’s nephew Jim hiding there. By the end of the book, the girls have helped Jim to find the will and safely escape his abusive step-father. Later in the series, Jim is adopted by the Wheeler family, and also becomes Trixie’s primary love interest (I love that this relationship is not at all rushed either).

The reading level for the Trixie Belden series is listed as grade 3 and above, but I had no problems being completely involved and intrigued by the storyline and characters as a twenty-three year old. I think I’ll continue to read the series on my own time, as I always enjoyed the full character line-up developed after a few books in.

Characters who aged well: Trixie! If my praise during this review didn’t make clear enough, she’s a wonderful character with great development. Honey and Jim are also solid characters, and Bobby and Trixie’s parents are well-written too- supportive and kind, but realistic concerning raising Trixie to be a responsible kid. Also going to add that Trixie’s group of best friends- self-named the Bob-Whites of the Glen and consisting of her two older brothers Brian and Mart, Honey, Jim and the later additions of Dan and Di- have a strong presence and very distinct personalities when they show up in the later novels.

Characters who aged badly: nobody! All the side characters were well done, including the villain. He wasn’t over-the-top by any means, his abuse of Jim was both emotion and physical in a realistic manner that concerned the adults around him enough to comment on it without actually taking proper action to help him, as it often goes. I appreciated the author’s ability to write a male character the vulnerable one, to recognise what was wrong about the situation, and to gladly accept help from two girls younger than him.

Favourite scene/quote: “‘serves him right,’ Trixie said, wiping her grimy hands on her rolled-up blue jeans. ‘The mean old miser. You should have left him lying in the driveway, Dad.’”

An earlier quote in the book, this sets the tone for Trixie’s character: she’s messy, no-nonsense and cheeky. For a female character written in 1948 I found this quite amusing. There’s none of the internalised misogyny that often popped up in ‘tomboy’ characters of the time: Trixie just is what she is, and she’s great.

A standout scene would be Trixie sucking the venom from her brother’s snakebite to save him, and the chapters focused on the developing friendship with Honey and Jim while the two teach Trixie how to handle horses is also enjoyable.

Overall verdict:

My mother was right, Trixie Belden is far better than Nancy Drew in every category I can think of. I wish that the series had gained the popularity that Nancy Drew did, because it would make for a fun movie or television show. There is an eighteen year gap between the publication of the first novel from both series, and both heroines saw many more books written after that. Nancy Drew is so persistent, however, that multiple movies and even a recent CW show have been made, though it is not very accurate to the books at all. Even now, modern-day setting Nancy Drew mysteries are still being released under the Carolyn Keene pseudonym, showing her unending mythical status.

I still love Nancy, bad writing and all, but in all fairness, Miss Trixie deserves a cut of the nostalgic hype surrounding the girl-detective genre. I’d also like to bask in the poetic justice of Nancy not only remaining a more iconic character than the Hardy Boys, but also becoming more feminist as time goes on. I’m sure the publisher is rolling in his grave!

#nancy drew #carolyn keene #trixie belden #girl detective #fiction #university project #nostalgia #feminism #female characters

[hajimes-erect-ahoge]

Postmortem- Chapter 15

Kokichi, Shuichi and Kaito go to the store and do some more training! ao3

The first thing Ouma registered upon waking up was that it was cold.

It wasn’t a blistering cold, but it was an absence of warmth that left him huddling under the covers in search of more heat. He vaguely recalled crawling into the lower bunk with Saihara last night, their bodies just barely close enough for them to feel each other’s body heat. Speaking of which, where was that body heat right now?

Groggily cracking his eyes open, Ouma sat up in bed and cast a quick glance to either side of him. Nothing. Saihara was gone and, upon inspection of the other bed in the room, Momota had risen as well.

Ouma yawned, interlocking his fingers and stretching his arms in front of him. He swung his legs over the side of the bed, but froze when he heard faint voices from the living room.

“Are you sure, Momota-kun?” Unmistakably Saihara’s voice asked, “He’ll find out soon enough, you know how he is.”

“Ouma doesn’t need to know!” Momota argued, “Besides, he’s still sleeping! I bet we’ll be back before he even wakes up!”

Both of them froze when they heard the creek of the bedroom door opening, revealing a less than pleased Ouma standing over the threshold.

“O-Ouma!” Momota stammered, “Uh… How much of that did you hear?”

“Enough.” Ouma frowned, sticking his nose in the air haughtily. “I can’t believe you two were making plans without me, right in my own home! How rude!”

“It’s not what it looks like!” Saihara spat out, panicking. “We were only trying to protect you!”

“Psh! I don’t need protecting! Who do you think I am?” Ouma crossed his arms, pouting. “Now out with it!”

“Fine…” Momota gave Saihara a quick look before continuing, “Me and Shuichi were thinking out heading to the supermarket to pick up some groceries and other necessities.”

“That’s it?” Ouma asked, perplexed. “What’s the big deal about that?”

“We figured you would probably want to come with us, but, uh…” Saihara scratched at the nape of his neck nervously, ���We’re not sure that’s the best idea.”

“Ohhhh, I see!” Ouma clapped his hands together excitedly. “Just kidding, I totally don’t get it. You were saying?”

“Listen, I know you don’t see it this way but you have enough on your plate already and we don’t want to give you even more to deal with.” Momota answered, “People probably aren’t going to react so greatly to seeing you out in person, especially after… you know…”

“We just don’t want you getting harassed or anything for what you did during the killing game.” Saihara explained, “I… I don’t want to see you get hurt, Ouma-kun.”

“Aw, how sweet!” Ouma grinned, “I appreciate the thought and all, but I don’t need you two protecting me from harm! I’m a big boy, I can handle myself!”

Saihara and Momota exchanged a worried glance, sensing Ouma’s stubbornness.

“Ouma-kun, please-” Saihara practically begged.

“It’s fine!” Ouma rolled his eyes, demonstrating his growing boredom. “I’ll show you that it’s no problem at all!”

“...Fine.” Momota gave in, not wanting to argue with him. “We leave in five.”

“Yay! I’ll go get ready!” Ouma gave a small cheer before running off, leaving Saihara and Momota standing awkwardly in the living room.

Both of them were clearly displeased at this turn of events, not having expected Ouma to wake up and interfere with their plans. But nonetheless, there was no taking back what had just transpired, so they simply prepared themselves for the inevitable.

After a short amount of time, Ouma returned to the living room to meet the other two once again.

“So what store are we even going to?” Ouma asked curiously.

“There’s a supermarket a few blocks from the apartment complex.” Saihara answered, “It’s pretty nice out so I figured we could walk there.”

“Okie dokie!” Ouma smiled, innocent as ever.

The trio then departed, making their way to the local supermarket.

~~~~~~~~~~

A few blocks later, the three boys arrived at the store. It was still quite early in the morning, thus the store was sparsely populated. This was the first time being in a public space since the killing game for all three of them, so it was agreed on that they should try to minimize their exposure to people for a bit. Ouma immediately took to observing the inside of the store, inadvertently making eye contact with a particularly sour-looking saleswoman. Paying no mind to it he quickly looked away after giving a sly smile. He was determined not to let anything get to him, solely focusing on getting in and out of the store.

The store was neither too large nor too small; It was big enough to house all of the supplies they needed yet small enough to seem cozy. Upon entering, the three boys decided it would be best to divide up their tasks, each of them searching a certain area of the store. Saihara was to stock up on food and drinks and Momota was to search for toiletries and other basic necessities not provided for them already, leaving Ouma to look for any other miscellaneous items. It was really a two-man job, as Saihara and Momota were covering both main areas of items that were needed, so Ouma took the opportunity to relax and browse the store for anything that seemed entertaining.

While Saihara and Momota occupied the first few aisles and middle of the store, Ouma took to the back shelves filled with various knick knacks and other goods. There were arts and crafts kits and board games suited for children, brightly colored with words that popped off the packaging. Travelling left led Ouma to discover a variety of puzzles, including a few milk puzzles. After a few moments of consideration, Ouma selected a puzzle that had the best chance at entertaining him, as well as a deck of cards and a mystery themed board game.

After scouring the remaining aisles for anything else that may have caught his attention, Ouma approached the register, noticing that the only open register was being run by the same lady that gave him a not-so-friendly look before. An awkward tension pierced the air as Ouma set his things down on the counter, sliding them forward.

The exchange was painfully silent as Ouma swiped his card, carefully stacking his items while sliding the receipt into his pocket. Mumbling a half-assed thank you, he gave the woman one last look, carefully observing her features.

The scoff that she gave almost went unheard by Ouma. Almost.

Narrowing his eyes, he stared back at her with more vitriol than before, though it hardly rivaled the look of pure disgust on her face.

“You’re lucky I even touched your filthy items, what with the horrible things you’ve done and all.” She spat, a haughty tone coating her words. “The other two I could deal with, but you’re really something else, you know? Walking in here like the whole outside world doesn’t hate you, acting like you’re above it all. It’s disgusting. I’m surprised you even got those two to tolerate you.” She gestured to Saihara and Momota, who were waiting outside of the store with their backs turned to Ouma, completely unaware of what was going on.

Ouma simply stared, processing the words that were just spat at him. He could deal with one person hating him, but the whole world outside of the killing game? Was he really that despised?

...Did his sacrifice mean nothing to them?

“I’d be careful if I were you.” The lady continued, ignorant of Ouma’s inner turmoil. “Or else you’ll end up back in the hospital where you belong.”

Eyeing her cautiously, he stepped backwards, slowly making his way to the exit. He had no idea how true this woman’s words were and he had no intention of finding out. Forcing the most obnoxious smile onto his face that he could muster, Ouma responded:

“Have a wonderful day, and thank you so much for the kind words. I truly appreciate it.”

The look of horror on the woman's face was most definitely worth it, Ouma thought.

With a quick turn of his heel he walked out of the store, meeting Saihara and Momota where they were standing outside.

“There you are!” Momota turned to him, “What took you so long?” He cast his gaze downwards, observing the items in Ouma’s hands. “What did you get?”

Ouma proudly showed off his items as they walked back to the apartment complex, describing each one with an unnecessary amount of detail. Momota then proceeded to call his purchases “childish” and “a waste of their money”, to which Ouma produced a waterfall of crocodile tears. By the time that Saihara was able to calm him down they had arrived at the apartment complex, the day still young.

Once they had arrived, they went about dispersing their newly purchased items into their new locations. While Saihara and Momota busied themselves with organizing things, Ouma simply threw the games he bought in the bedroom and went to go watch some television. For the time being he was content with just relaxing, the words of the woman from the store having been shoved to the back of his mind for now.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Alright, that’s enough stretching!” Momota declared, standing up straight. “It’s time for today’s workout!”

The sun was rapidly setting, the glowing orange tint of the sky fading into a purple-black. Soon enough, they would be engulfed by the darkness of the night.

“So what’s the workout for today?” Saihara asked, finishing up the last of his stretches.

“A run!” Momota announced proudly, messing with a few of the buttons on his new watch. “Fifty laps around the apartment complex!” With a loud beep of his watch, Momota took off running in the direction of the apartment complex, located just across from the park.

“Should we follow h-” Saihara turned towards Ouma, who was already sprinting away after Momota. With a sigh, Saihara began to jog after them, careful to conserve his energy.

Momota, who was already by the apartment complex, gave a quick look over his shoulder, smirking when he saw Saihara lagging behind. When he turned back forward, however, he yelped in surprise as he saw Ouma jogging slightly ahead of him.

“Nishishi!” Ouma giggled, noticing Momota exclaim in shock. “Momota-chan must be pretty out of shape if he can’t even keep up with me!”

“Huh?! You little-!” Momota sped up, chasing after Ouma. “I’ll show you who’s out of shape!”

“I’d like to see you try!” Ouma sprinted even faster, feeling surprisingly good. All of that running away from Momota that he did in the past was proving useful, he supposed.

Ouma and Momota remained in a stalemate for quite a while, each of them refusing to give in and slow down, even if that would be beneficial to them in the long run. Fatigue quickly settled in and they each began to slow down, though they stubbornly kept going.

Then Ouma tripped.

“Woah!” Momota came to a halt, crouching down besides Ouma. “Are you okay?”

“...Momota-chan…” Ouma whispered weakly, eyes downcast.

“...Yeah?”

“You’re so gullible!” Ouma took off in a sprint once more, barreling ahead of Momota.

“Damnit!” Momota tried, but failed, to catch up with Ouma, who had benefited greatly from the headstart he gave himself.

He ran and ran, but eventually Ouma disappeared from his line of sight, blurring into the horizon.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ouma had been running for what felt like hours, though in reality he knew it had probably been closer to about fifteen minutes. The apartment complex was already relatively large in perimeter, and doing laps around it only made him realize how truly large it must’ve been. It was completely dark out by now, the sun having dipped fully below the horizon. The moon was shining brightly, casting a shimmer of moonlight over his face.

Arriving at the entrance to the apartment complex, Ouma took note of how many laps he had completed. A quick check over his shoulder let Ouma know that neither Momota nor Saihara were nearby, giving him the perfect opportunity to take a break. He bent over, hands on his knees, panting. After staying like that for a few moments, he did a quick stretch and stood back up, letting out one last breath.

Staring into the distance, Ouma saw two figures approaching from the opposite direction.

“Saihara-chan! Momota-chan! There you guys are!” Ouma shouted, “I was starting to think you guys got lost or something!”

No response.

But Ouma could’ve swore he saw the two figures speed up.

Panic started to settle in as the two figures got closer and Ouma realized that they were, in fact, not Saihara and Momota. Forcing himself to move on shaky legs, he realized that he would stand little chance in a fight against two men significantly larger than him, especially with how winded he was from all the running he just did. With no other option but to run, Ouma forced himself to turn around, barely seeing the two mysterious men break out into a full sprint.

Two strong hands gripped his shoulders, jerking him backwards despite his attempts to get away. Before he could even turn around, something heavy and metallic connected with his head, sending a blaring pain throughout his skull. One hand breaking his fall and the other clutching his head, he could barely make out the two faces of the men right in front of him. He felt another sharp pain in his head, the arm supporting him giving out and causing him to crash into the ground.

The sound of two men laughing was the last thing he could remember before going unconscious.

#postmortem #my writing #danganronpa #danganronpa v3 #kokichi ouma #kokichi oma #shuichi saihara #oumasai #saiouma #kaito momota

[msjr0119]

Cordonian Wags

Part 26

In a world full of Professional footballers and their demanding wives- can their football team nicknamed the ‘Cordonian Apples’ succeed? An American female physiotherapist joins the club. Will this cause issues with the footballers wives?

*This series is based on The Royal Romance characters who belong to Pixelberry - AU Plot switch*

Please do not read if you are under the age of 18. If you do you are consenting that you are over this age. If any of the below warnings affect you, please don’t continue to read.

Warnings: Swearing, mention of cancer treatment, mention of a one night stand, mention of drugs (past tense), jealousy, mention of infertility.

A/N: Another filler chapter 😊, sorry for being so useless - the last chapter was posted in May 😮

Previously: Riley received her results, her and Drake became closer again. That was until a ‘boys night’ out where a stranger informed Drake that he had fathered her son many years ago. Catch up here.

Tags- if you want to be removed/added please let me know 😊: @pedudley @kacie-0156 @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bascmve01 @texaskitten30 @nikkis1983 @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @kimmiedoo5 @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @axwalker @yukinagato2012 @indiacater @seriouslybadchoices @rainbowsinthestorm @cordonianroyalty @desireepow-1986 @choices97

****

“I can’t. You see... we have a son together....” The woman provided crocodile tears unknown the men. Drake froze- in shock. There were so many thoughts running through his mind; embarrassment that he couldn’t remember that weekend. What the hell did this mean for him and Riley? Then he believed that she was faking it for a story- to gain money.

“You’re lying! Leave us alone.” Believing that his ignorance would make the woman disappear, he was wrong. She remained stood next to him refusing to leave.

“Drakeeeeee....” Maxwell prolonged his name in a whiny tone, as his drunk mind thought back to that weekend.

“For fuck sake, Max... what?”

“The morning after you know what.... there was a woman leaving your room. But she was brunette...” Doubting himself after realising that this woman was blonde, his drunk mind couldn’t function anymore- even if he tried.

“I change my hair colour all of the time.” She interrupted as she shrugged her shoulders defending herself. Clicking on to her photo album, she showed Drake a picture of the young boy.

“He looks like his daddy doesn’t he?”

“This is something that you’d fucking do. Riley is going to be heartbroken.” Liam whispered to Leo.

“Just because she has a picture of a kid, it doesn’t mean that it’s Drakes. We better get back to warn Riley....” Before Leo could continue, their phones all beeped in unison. Fuck.

“Listen, if you are being sincere I want a DNA test. Now I’m going home, to spend time with my girlfriend. If the kid is mine, then I will pay for him.”

“Don’t you want to get to know him?” Sounding sincere, the other men in a way were glad that it wasn’t them stuck in this situation. Without each other knowing they were all wondering how Riley would react. They knew that Drake was determined to keep his relationship with Riley- but how would he do that now?

“No, not yet anyway. I need to see my girlfriend.”

“That’s if she’s still your girlfriend. Here’s my number. Text me yours and we will discuss anything and everything.” Snatching the napkin away with the number on it, he didn’t care what his teammates had planned for the remainder of the evening.

****

In the taxi on the way back, there was silence- unlike the others who had sobered up quickly due to the shock, Maxwell was still drunk. Pissing in a bottle in the back seat, carefully aiming it before they got fined.

“So congratulations baby daddy. Actually it’s not a baby... it’s a kid... ah you know what I mean.”

“Shut the fuck up Maxwell!” Everybody jumped in reaction to Drake’s tone of voice. “The one person I wanted so desperately to have a child with I can’t. I fucking asked her to marry me before her operation. But she fell asleep so I never mentioned it again. I’ve only just won her trust back, I was planning to propose to her properly- especially now we’ve had this positive news about her condition. I had everything fucking planned out. Do you think she would accept the situation if he is my son?” The Rys’s just shrugged their shoulders, deep down they knew that Riley most likely wouldn’t accept it to begin with- especially as the mother of the child was still around. Dropping Maxwell off first, they were relieved that he wasn’t part of their company anymore.

The two brothers, decided to go into Bastien’s for extra support- they had a feeling that they was about to either enter a battlefield or a situation that would be similar to being in a morgue.

****

Bastien opened the door after hearing the taxi pull up, he was stuck in the middle. He was close to Drake, but Riley was his niece- therefore it would be hard for him to ‘pick a side’.

“Drake... it’s not a good idea for you to be here.”

“Bast... please...” Riley walked over, the men could tell that she was beyond upset.

“Ri, talk to me please....” Closing her eyes, she didn’t make eye contact with any of them- instead just walked to the corner of the room. Drake followed her, hoping that she would talk to him. Even just look at him.

“I don’t remember that weekend. Christ, I don’t even remember her for that matter. We won the league and went to Paphos to celebrate. I remember the flight there and back. A few bars. That is it.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Sighing, she didn’t want this conversation to last any longer than it needed. “What’s done is done, Drake.”

“I love you. I want us to be together. If it is my kid. It doesn’t change anything between us. He’s around six years old. It was before we even got together. I was single. Please, Ri...”

“But it does...” Finally making eye contact with him, a single tear crept out of the corner of her eye. “You potentially have a child, a child that has missed out years with his father..I love you, Drake. There won’t be a day that will go by without me loving you. But you and I.... that cannot happen at the moment.”

“Ri....”

“Please just let me finish...” Drake nodded, if anything he knew what the conversation was leading to. And it was breaking his heart. “You need to be a father to your child. You might even grow close to it’s Mother. I’m sorry, but I want - I need you to focus on the child.”

“I will focus on him. If he is my son. It’s probably bullshit, Riley. But we can still be together. Please. Don’t split up with me... I’m begging you...” Kissing him slowly, this was her way in saying goodbye. “I think you should go.”

“No! I’m not leaving. Not without you anyway. When you was going in for your operation, I asked you to marry me. But you fell asleep. I want you to be my wife. The mother of my children. My life.”

“Don’t make this any harder... just be a father. Something that you’ve always wanted. Something that I can never give you. I love you, always.” Walking away, the men suggested that he left her alone. Even if it killed him. They knew how much he loved her, and that the two of them both would require some time to get their heads around the situation. Going upstairs he packed his bags, feeling heartbroken that he was going home alone. Again. Ambling downstairs, he wiped the tears- not wanting to gain attention to himself. If the rumour was true, it was self infliction.

“I’m sure she will come around, son. Just give her time. It’s just shit after shit, but you’ve both pulled through in the past.”

“Why us though? Look after her for me Bast..”

Before leaving, he wanted to try one last attempt at persuading her to change her mind.

“Ri.. it might not be my child. If he is, I will provide for him. As I want to provide for you. I’m going to leave. I hope that you’ll come home at some point, the ring that is on the side in your room. It’s yours. Even if you don’t want to talk to me ever again, no one will ever replace the love I have for you...” Leo and Liam provided her with a soft smile, before hugging her and escorting Drake away. Holding the tears back, Bastien held on to her tightly reassuring her that everything was going to get better. Nodding in agreement to everything that he said, she then made her way to her bedroom. Seeing the velvet box on the dressing table- she opened it. Her heart instantly sunk.

I don’t want to give my Grandmother’s ring to anyone but you. You mean the world to me, I love you unconditionally. I hope that you will talk to me when you’re ready. X

****

A couple of days after, Drake text the mystery woman. Not that he wanted to. He needed to. The sooner the paternity results of the child came back, the sooner he could work out his life plan.

“Thank you for communicating with me. Your home is beautiful...”

“So, I need that test done as soon as possible. Then we can work out what we are going to do depending on the results.” The woman silently began to panic. “Of course. I’ve got the swab in my bag. Results can take days if you want it to be quick.”

“Great. I’ll do it now then.” A few minutes later, Drake handed her the swab back.

“I need to go to training. Once the results come back, contact me.”

“I will do. My names Amy by the way.”

“Talk to you soon, Amy.”

****

Riley joined Bastien downstairs, the last few days she had kept herself to herself. The ring was still where Drake had left it. All she could think about was him. The possibility that they could have been engaged. The possibility that she would be a step mother. If Luis was still alive, she believed that Drake would step into the step father role- no problem. Could she do it too in these circumstances? All these what ifs didn’t matter, now- not until the child’s paternity was disclosed. The night that she was with the girls, Madeleine and Kiara had both text her- at the time she believed it was suspicious. Just the two of them causing trouble. That was until she looked on Twitter.

NEWS JUST IN- A few of the Apples players attended the Applewood Bar just now when it was disclosed that striker Drake Walker has a secret love child. There is evidence which we will publish soon. What does this mean for Walkers relationship with Riley Brooks? They are on and off like a light switch - The Trend

“Coffee?” Bastien asked her. He was relieved that she had finally come out of her hovel. “I can skip training, as far as I’m aware they are all okay. It’s highly unlikely that they will pick up an injury- I’m sure Bertrand and Leo won’t mind. We can go for lunch?”

“It’ll be just your luck that one of them accidentally breaks something and neither of us are there. We can go for something to eat after if you’d like?”

“Sounds great. I’ll see you later, sweetheart.”

****

Riley arrived at the cafe, meeting her arch enemies not that she wanted to. She would much prefer to be in Timbuktu or stuck on a deserted island. Taking a deep breath she immediately saw the two of them providing fake smiles.

“Bonjour, Riley.” Bonjour home wrecker bitch, was what Kiara really intended on saying.

“It’s good to see you, Riley. I believed that you’d be in hiding after the hideous comments that The Trend has previously made about you.” Riley thought about the last few days worth of tweets regarding her. Deep down she believed that the British press were cruel towards her- now she realised that no matter where in the world a ‘celebrity’ would be the press would psychotic vultures.

“Us Americans are made of steel ladies. Nothing can break us. So why did you want to see me?” Why am I here? They’ve probably set a trap up for me.

“We just wanted to make sure that you are coping with everything. That weekend in Paphos, the men were all wasted, they will have all had one night stands. Leo cheated on me, and they wonder why I turned into a bitch? I’m surprised it was Drake who managed to get someone pregnant that weekend.” No you’ve always been a bitch, and always will be. Wait! How does she know where and when this woman became pregnant? No information has been disclosed about this.

“Surprising huh. You never know Madeleine, there could be more kids knocking about...” Deciding to keep her enemies close, she decided to play nice as this whole situation was suspicious.

“Wouldn’t surprise me. You better warn your sister.” Kiara suggested in a serious manner.

“It would deserve her right though wouldn’t it? Look how karma bit me in the ass. I’m sorry, Kiara. Every couple has arguments and fights right? And I stole your man, it serves me totally right.” The two women looked at each other with a confused expression. Wondering why Riley was on their side?

“Well this kid looks like Drake, there’s no doubt about it. Let’s hope that he can afford six years worth of child maintenance..” How does she know what this child looks like?

“He better score some more goals then, hadn’t he ladies? Erm, I really need to get off. Maybe we can be friends? Do this again? I’m sorry for everything in the past, but I’m hoping that we can be friends. I’m not really part of the team- I’m just the physio. The three of us are outsiders, so we can arrange our own ladies nights? Have fun as the three singletons?” Riley didn’t wait for the two of them to elaborate, her jaw and cheeks were beginning to ache with all the fake smiles. “Here, have a few drinks on me as an apology. We will arrange something real soon. I promise.” Leaving the table, she let out a sigh of relief that she could escape.

“See I told you we would get her on our side, Ki. As a newcomer, these girls just think about getting laid with the footballers. They don’t think of the consequences. I’d have thought that she would have known out of everybody though- due to her previously being a Wag herself. Karma really does happen- eventually.” Raising the glass of champagne, she smirked towards her best friend. “Cheers, Kiara.”

****

Arriving at the stadium, she knew that everyone was going to be shocked with her presence. Luckily they were all still in the changing room, walking on to the field she tied her hair in a high pony tail and put her tracksuit on. Hearing the stampede appear a few minutes later, she turned around to face them all smiling at each and everyone - including Drake. She wasn’t going to ignore him totally. Bastien and the Rys’s immediately ran over to her.

“What the fuck are you doing here? If you’re coming back to work there’s no need for me to be here...” Winking at her, she knew that when she was ready to return full time, that Bastien would stick around. As extra support.

“I need to tell you all something....I’ve just met up with Madeleine and Kiara...”

“WHY THE FUCK HAVE YOU MET UP WITH THEM?” Leo snapped that loud, that his voice echoed around the stadium- causing everybody to stare at the group. All wondering why their captains positive attitude had suddenly changed.

“That night, they text me about the woman and Drake before The Trend tweeted about it. Then they asked to meet up...”

“So that’s why you was up and about this morning..”

“Precisely... anyway... I met them, and they were talking about Drakes situation- Madeleine knew about information that hasn’t yet been published. She knew exactly how old the kid was- Drake knew because she told him about Paphos. Madeleine told me where and when this woman apparently conceived.”

“She’s right, Nothing has been said on any social media about the full details as of yet. How does Madeleine know?” Liam confirmed. They all looked at each other, then focused their gaze onto Drake who was doing kick ups- keeping himself busy. “I’m meeting them again at some point...” Riley broke the silence, if not she would just be staring at Drake at day- she missed him immensely.

“No you’re not!”

“Yes I am, Leo. If they are behind this, Drake deserves to know...”

“At least wait until the tests come back, he was saying before that she went to his house to do the swab. It might not even be his. If they are involved, it could just be a fake story...” Liam suggested before elaborating. “At least take Olivia with you when you meet them. Or Hana. I’d avoid Lindsey just because she’s in a relationship with Leo.”

“Are you two going to do some work today?” Bertrand interrupting scowling, his two main players would rather be like gossiping old women in his mind. Not taking their job seriously.

“Sorry, Bertrand. It was my fault. They are both yours now.”

“Very well, get on the pitch you two.... It’s good to see you back, Riley. You’re looking well. Are you okay to be working though?”

“Of course I am, I’ll take it slow. It’ll be like a phased return. Don’t worry.” Patting her on the back, he left them. Riley and Bastien made their way off of the pitch, but someone pulled her to the side.

“Bonjour, stranger!”

“Hey, Olivier.” Picking her up, he held her tightly before placing her back on to the ground. Once upon a time, they were close friends. When Xavier had accused her of having an affair with him, she ghosted him- for her own safety. Drake noticed how close they were, jealousy raged throughout his body. Seeing her from a distance, he wished that it was he that was with her. However, would allow her to come to him first. Not wanting to give her any excuse to avoid him even more.

“How are you doing? I’m sorry about everything. Xavier, mainly. If I’d have known, I’d have.. we’d have....” Placing her finger on to his lips, she didn’t want to talk about the past- instead it was her aim to focus on the present and future.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. Please don’t break anything this time though... you’re a very bad patient!”

“I’ll try not to. I wouldn’t be playing again if it wasn’t for you. I’m forever grateful. So, Merci.”

“I’d be a rubbish physio if I’d let you all injure yourselves and not be able to play again.”

“You’re the best. Maybe we could go out for a drink or something at some point? A little catch up?” Rubbing his neck, he was nervous suggesting this. He had always believed that she was beautiful but didn’t want to break the ‘friend zone’ rules. Not only that, he didn’t want Drake to attempt to break one of his limbs as she was his girl first.

“Sure, let me know when and where.” Kissing her on the cheek, he suggested that she decided on when they would meet up. Drake had enough of watching the interaction between the two of them, storming off of the pitch he headed towards the changing room. Riley followed him, not knowing what to expect.

“Hey.. what are you doing?”

“I needed to use the restroom.” Lying, he didn’t want to inform her about the truth. How heartbroken he was, how jealous he was seeing her smile and laugh with his new team mate.

“Okay, I’ll leave you to it.”

“Riley......”

“Yeah?”

“Nothing, it doesn’t matter. Look after yourself...” I love you.

“Drake... I....” I love you “I will. You too.”

****

A week after training, the majority of the main team minus Drake met up at Liam’s. In secret- making sure that the paparazzi wasn’t aware.

“Is this a belated celebratory party for Riley then?” Slinging his shoulder over her, he wanted a good excuse to party as always.

“No, Maxwell. Listen it’s about this whole thing regarding Drake. What happened in Paphos?”

“It was pretty much like the hangover. Except we didn’t end up with a tiger in the hotel room... imagine if we did.” Not taking the conversation seriously, Maxwell was now imagining the team hungover in some hotel room with a tiger. Laughing to himself, he was thinking about going to Vegas next time.

“Well I can remember bits, I remember having a different woman each night.” Lindsey sighed at her boyfriends truthfulness as she shook her head. “Hey, I’m not like that anymore. I vaguely remember Drake pushing women away. All he cared about was what whiskey he was drinking. Unlike us, he was never interested in flirting with women. Jeeze, when he got with Kiara- Maxwell asked her out on behalf of him.”

“But Drake did have a brunette come out of his room....” Maxwell knew that this was a fact, even if he was still intoxicated the following morning- so needed to repeat himself about it.

“Where was Drake?” Riley asked, hoping to get straight to the point.

“Asleep in the bath, wearing his boxers- covered in vomit...which is unlike him. Because, ya know- he can drink anyone under the table.. maybe it was those pills I popped in to our first drinks that made us all the way we was.” Shrugging his shoulder, he jumped as the brothers both shouted in unison.

“You did what?”

“It doesn’t matter...” Riley said not having the time for full details- all she wanted to know was the specific details of that weekend, ones that involved Drake. “So...Drake was passed out in the bath. Can a man fuck a woman if they are that drunk?” Everybody turned to face Leo, if anyone knew the answer to that it would be him.

“Hey! Why are you all looking at me to answer that question?”

“Because I know I can’t, big brother. I’d say that you’re the most experienced one to answer this question. Once I’m drunk I struggle to cum so don’t bother.”

“That is true, but you make up for it.” Olivia winked.

“I’d probably attempt it, but no I probably wouldn’t be able to do it - especially if I was drugged!” Scowling towards Maxwell, as he mentioned the drugs- Maxwell just shrugged as if it was something and nothing.

“So did anyone contact any of you? Expecting for it to be more than a holiday fling?” The men looked at each other and shook their heads.

“So are we in agreement that this woman could be lying? To sell a story or something?”

“If Madeleine and Kiara are involved- it could be anything from selling a story, to getting revenge on the club. Next time you meet them, I’m coming with you, Riley. So is, Hana.”

“Am I?” Hana began to panic, not really wanting to get involved in this type of drama.

“Yes, you are! Penelope I know you’d come up with some lame excuse so I’ll accept your rejection now. And Savannah, you’d just fuck the whole plan up. Sorry not sorry.”

“Liv! I’m not that bad! I want my brother to be happy. Again. With Riley.” Providing Riley with a soft smile, deep down she knew that it was Riley’s and Drakes relationship that was on the line- but she hoped that they could fight for their love.

“Olivia! I have children to look after. I can talk to Kiara. If you need me to. Myself and Zeke haven’t spoken to her much but we haven’t totally shut her out of our life.”

“Personally I don’t think that my sister would be involved. She would know that we would completely disown her. Then she would have nobody.” Zeke elaborated, as much as he hated Kiara for her past actions he would keep peace to get to the bottom of this mess if Kiara was the mastermind behind it all.

“If the child is miraculously his, would you get back with him, Ri? He misses you so much. We can all tell.” Everybody waited impatiently for an answer. In a way wishing that Maxwell wouldn’t bring up such an insensitive question.

“I miss him too. But if the child is his, he needs to focus on him first. Then maybe in the future, we could reunite... so if plan A fails- I’ve got a plan B up my sleeve.” Leaving the sentence at that, they all wondered what Riley was planning. They continued to drink for a few hours even though they shouldn’t - but Bertrand was doing it too. To pass time they all talked mainly about; the upcoming matches, the possibility of having a new chairman to replace Constantine, the need for a new manager or at least a head coach if Bertrand was to become a full time manager.

“Right, see you all at the match tomorrow.” Liam thanked everybody for their company, before escorting each and every one of them out of his mansion.

****

Drake had text everyone wondering what they was up to. Unlike them all, especially Maxwell. No one had responded. He knew that he shouldn’t drink the night before match day - but he felt so alone. Hearing a knock at the door, he had hoped it was one of his friends- just for a bit of company. Or even Riley.

“Oh... it’s you.” Not sounding very enthusiastic about his surprise visitor at such a time, he now regretted opening the door.

“Hi, sorry to drop by. But the results came back today. I’ve brought your son, Luis to meet you.” My son. Fuck. Luis? Riley would never get back with me now.

“Tonight is not an appropriate time to meet him. I need to rest for the match tomorrow.”

“Rest? Why is there a whiskey in your hand then?” Fuck. “Come on honey, this is your daddy.” The child looked up at his mother- he seemed hesitant, Drake assumed he was just shy. Amy barged her way through the door with two bags. Much to Drake’s disgust.

“Care to explain to me as to why you are practically moving in to my house without asking?”

“I’m not moving in, I just thought that we could stay a few days.... So you can get to know him better.”

“Show me the paperwork...” smirking, she handed it to him in an instant. She could sense the disappointment creep up onto his face- but she didn’t care one bit.

“You can stay for one night. I’ll go and make a bed up for him. You can sleep on the couch!” Agreeing, she knew this was step one. Eventually, Drake may even fall for her- or so she had hoped. Otherwise she would be a dead woman.

“Mommy why did you call me Luis, my name is Jenson? I want to see Daddy. My real Daddy.” Crouching down to the young child, she placed her finger across her lips whilst whispering ‘shhh’.

“Just play along darling. Your aunt has promised to get you anything that you want if you just lie. Do it for Aunt Maddy.”

#choices trr #trr fanfic #theroyalromance #trr au cordonian wags #drake x riley #drake x mc #riley brooks #maxwell beaumont #liam rys #leo rys #drake walker #olivia nevrakis #hana lee #bertrand beaumont #savannah walker #trr kiara #trr madeleine #bastien lykel #long post #tw swearing #tw one night stand mention #tw mention of drugs #tw mention of cancer treatment #tw jealousy #tw mention of infertility

[elena-reina]

Three Years Ago - Clint Barton x Reader

Request: can you do an image with hawkeye and he has to hunt down the reader who is an assassin and falls in love with her and she is just super badass but then something happens and she is no longer an assassin, and disappears for a bit but meets with him again in the end thank you!! - Anon

A/N: I feel like I sped a lot, but most of the points are there. Maybe, could just be me. Hope you like it.

Warnings: None

"I'm sure you all have wondered why I've gathered you all here today," Agent Fury spoke aloud walking back and forth with his arms behind his back.

 He brought one of his arms up with a remote in his hand and pointed it at the screen. It showed a video of some of the agents in SHIELD. They were getting brutally murdered by you. "This mystery woman has been slaughtering our men left and right," Fury glared, "We need to put a stop to her and I'm assigning one of you to do it." "I'd hate to burst your bubble, but if the rest of the agents can't do it, what makes you think we can?" Tony spoke, rolling his eyes. "Because, believe it or not, you're the Avengers!" Fury spat. Tony put his hands up in defense and backed away. 

"Now, any volunteers?" he asked. No one raised their hands or spoke up. 

Steve already had a lot to do on his hands and to be given an extra mission would stress him out even more. Bruce was too busy in the lab and wouldn't have anyone there to control him if he Hulked out. Tony would probably just be flirting the entire way and Natasha already had to deal with cleaning up after everybody. Clint, on the other hand, has only been training, not really having much on his hands. He, however, still believes he should be secluded away to himself- mission free. "Alright, since no one will speak up- Barton! I'm assigning you to the job," Fury instructed. Clint dropped his arrow and his mouth fell agape. "Me? Why me?" he gasped," Why can't you make Tony or Steve?" "Way to sell us out, Clint," Tony glared. "I believe you are the most capable for the job-" "HEY! Are you saying the rest of us can't handle this assassin chick?" Tony scoffed. Natasha elbowed him in the ribs muttering for him to shut up. He gasped in pain, clutching the side of his ribs, not speaking another word. "Yes. That is exactly what I'm saying. Barton, I believe you are the most capable for the job. You are an excellent long-distance shooter. She'll never see you coming," he grinned. 

Clint rolled his eyes, sitting up in his seat. Even if he didn't want to do it, he didn't have a choice. Once Fury chooses you for a mission, you have to do that mission. "Fine," Clint huffed. The tower's alarm began to go off as an exclamation mark appeared on the screen. Fury clicked on it, observing what was happening. You appeared on the screen once again terrorizing Fury's men. Fury was getting more livid watching all of his men fail. He turned to Clint and pointed towards the door. "She's acting now! Go!" he yelled. "On it," Clint sighed picking up his bow and arrows, running out the door.

Clint sat perched up on a building looking around for you. He has yet to spot you, yet he still sees agents dying everywhere. Were you also a shooter? Maybe a skilled dagger-thrower? Clint didn't know. And it didn't help him at all that he couldn't spot you. He sighed to himself, always having his bow and arrow armed and ready to go. He was about to hop to another building when something familiar caught his eye. 

He narrowed his eyes down to the street and saw that familiar Y/H/C hair flying through the wind. You were rapidly running down the streets, dodging everything that became an obstacle in your course. Clint swiftly jumped down from the building and landed roughly on top of rubble as he held his bow up while running. He shot towards your arm, just skimming it enough to create a hole on your leather jacket. You gasped, slowing down to examine your arm. No skin was broken, only your jacket. 

Rapidly looking behind you, you widened your eyes when you saw the one and only Clint chasing after you. You turned back around and picked up speed. 

You grabbed a small knife from inside your coat and threw it behind you. Clint dodged it as you turned the corner. You grabbed onto a pole, swinging yourself up and onto a building. You sat there catching your breathe looking for Hawkeye, but didn't spot him and let out a breathe of relief. You stood up, casually turning around and let out a mini scream in your throat. There he was behind you, with his arrow right in front of your nose. You looked at it and back at him. "Surrender!" he screamed, "Now!"

He was really exhausted from having to chase you everywhere. You studied his face as he glared at you. Boy was he handsome, but you weren’t going to let that distract you.

You nodded your head slowly, taking one step back. He slightly lowered his bow, but not all the way. You smirked, shot your leg and kicking him back in the chest, catching him off guard. 

He groaned as he slammed into the ground. You dashed down the side of the building and jumped down to the streets. Clint, trailed not too far behind you, making sure he doesn't lose you this time. You looked back making sure to not stop running once. 

You were passing by a flower shop and you roughly threw the flower stand down to block his way. However, Clint being very stealthy, leaped over it and grabbed another one of his arrows from his back. He shot at a fire hydrant making it explode up in gushes of water. 

You screeched at the sudden explosion and jumped back. You turned your head for one moment until Clint then tackled you. He straddled above you, making sure to keep his arrow pointed at your neck this time, the tip being pushed against your skin under your chin. 

You had lost your sunglasses due to the explosion of the fire hydrant, so now he could see your eyes. Your eyes had shown fear clearly evident in them. You were breathing heavily up and down from all the running as you stared back into his eyes. His beautiful blue eyes. "I'm not going to tell you again!" Clint glared, "Surrender now!" You had to think of a plan to escape immediately.

And then it hit you.

You forcefully made your eyes begin to water as you couldn't move otherwise. He rolled his eyes at your actions, not buying it. "That's not going to work on me," he glared. This however wasn't going to discourage you. Number one rule is to never blow up your cover. And you weren't going to blow it up any time soon. "Y-You're hurting me. You're too heavy!" you cried, squirming under him. "Please get off!" He narrowed his eyes at you, still not moving. He moved his bow and arrow closer to your neck, still not buying it. "Please," you pleaded. Clint, still half-heartily loosened his grip on you, making it easier for you not only to breathe, but to also escape. You stopped the crocodile tears and cunningly smiled. You kneed him where the sun doesn't shine as he toppled over in pain. You quickly hopped up and ran. Clint, still bent over in pain, forced himself to get up. He, now at a disadvantage, slowly trailed behind you. "I knew I should've listened to my instincts..." he muttered to himself. 

He was blocking traffic and cars were honking left and right at him. However, he didn't care. He was on a mission and he needed to fulfill that duty. 

One car in particular that kept getting blocked by Clint, had enough of his shenanigans. He stepped forcefully on the gas pedal, aiming to run over Clint. Clint, oblivious to this, kept running forward. You turning around, far ahead from Clint, noticed the car driver aiming to run him over. You widened your eyes and mindlessly began to run back over towards Clint to push him away. You sprinted and thankfully was close enough to be able to push him out of the way. 

You thrust yourself at him, knocking him out of the way and onto the sidewalk as the asshole driver sped by. You landed on top of Clint with his hands on your waist and yours on the side of his head, above him. He looked into your eyes as you stared into his. No words were spoken. You felt your heartbeat rate pick up faster as the world around you seemed to slow down. No! You can't do this! You cannot be feeling like this! You cannot be gaining feelings for the enemy! 

Your phone vigorously buzzed in your jacket pocket and you knew exactly who that was. You had to get out of there and fast before anyone saw you. Especially your boss. You abruptly pushed Clint off of you and rolled onto the side. You pushed yourself up and ran off as fast as you could. Leaving Clint lying there flabbergasted. Clint only stared at you this time as you ran off. Not bothering to catch you this time. He smirked as he knew that he had fun chasing you. Clint picked himself up as he knew he had failed his mission. However he didn't care now. But he had to go back to the tower to face the music.

You were walking back to your headquarters, dreadfully talking to Deadpool.

"And this is why you will never be the boss' favorite," Deadpool chuckled.

You glared at him. "Oh shut up already," you spat, crossing your arms. "The way you both laid there-" he had paused to begin laughing annoyingly, "Priceless!"

“Oh ha-ha so funny. You’re hilarious Deadpool, really, so hilarious,” you huffed, rolling your eyes and pushing him away.

He smirked and folded his arms. “I told boss we couldn’t send you out there on the mission. You let your emotions get in the way of everything,” he spat. That's when you've had enough. "You know what? That's it!" you stomped, not moving with him anymore. He turned towards you raising his hands out in confusion. "What?" he asked. "I've had enough of all your smartass remarks. You can go tell boss that I quit!"

-Three Years Later- You were casually strolling through the city you had once caused chaos in. You frowned upon your past as you kept walking. You weren't proud of it, but you had to pay bills somehow, right? A scream was heard in the distance and you shot your head towards the sound. "Help! Someone help!" a small voice squeaked. 

Using your skills from three years earlier, you ran fast through the streets. You turned through the corners and met with a boy hanging off of a ledge. He was maybe eight or seven years old.

You swiftly jumped up onto the building, grabbing onto the sides slowly crawling up. You almost lost your footing, but grabbed onto another side of the building. You hauled yourself up, getting just close enough with the boy. He was crying and looked at you with fear in his baby brown eyes. "Kid! Drop!" you exclaimed. He looked at you like you were crazy. You huffed through your mouth and held out an open arm, while the other one clung to the building. "Just trust me and drop! I'll catch you!" you yelled over the howling wind, "Trust me!" "Well... well... well," a familiar voice spoke. You widened your eyes and glared, looking back at where the voice came from. 

Deadpool.

"Look who's turned into a superhero." He made a fake gagging noise and walked over to where the boy was holding on for his life. He bent down and ruffled the boys hair. "It'd be such a shame if he had maybe... oh I don't know," he spoke grabbing onto the boys head with his hand, "Fell." He powerfully pushed the kid off of the ledge and walked away without a care. You gasped and barely caught the kid. Just barely. He was screaming for his mom and clung onto you, terrified. "HELP!" he frantically screamed over and over again. You cringed at him screaming in your ear. 

"Don't worry, I'll get you down," you told him, looking down at the crowd of people now on the ground below you, watching attentively. You bit down on your lower lip thinking of a way of how you were going to get down. You slowly stepped down, but lost your footing and gasped as you slipped. You let out a little scream as you were falling. You clutched the little boy to your chest to make sure you'd get more critical damage than he. Squeezing your eyes shut, you waited for the impact to come. But it never did. Instead a strong pair of arms quickly caught you. "Are you alright miss-" You opened your eyes and met those familiar pair of blue eyes. You gasped as the little boy hopped out of your arms and ran to his mom. Hawkeye. "You," he breaths, staring back into your eyes. You don't say a word as you didn't know what to say. "Clint! C'mon!" Steve yells. "Go." Clint mutters placing you down and running off. You watched him quickly run off into the distance. You sigh to yourself as you ignore the countless thank you's from the family of the boy and run off. You don't know where you're headed, but it's somewhere else but here. You sat down on a park bench, looking at everybody pass by. Why did you freeze up? You weren't afraid of him. Not intimidated either. You got this feeling in the pit of your stomach that silenced you. Like your brain was asleep and your mouth was frozen. 

You must've look like you were so weak and you hated it! You were the opposite of weak. Or at least you thought you were. Never has something like that happen to you. Next time, IF there is a next time, you will- "Hey," a voice spoke beside you. You jumped, alarmed and looked to your side. Hawkeye or as you heard one of his buddies call him, Clint. You settled down and calmed your senses. You gave a nod of acknowledgement and shyly looked away. "What happened to you within the years?" he asked. You gave a sigh. "I... I uhm. I just had to get away." "From what?" he pressed. You looked into his eyes once more. You can't lie to him and you knew exactly what from you had to get away. "You." "Me?" he asked," Why?" "Because!" You exclaimed thrusting your arms outward exasperated," You make my brain go all weird and I can't think straight! I get this anxious and weird feeling in my stomach that makes me what to throw up, but never do. And would you just stop it?! Stop doing that!" He looked at you with his eyebrows raised. "Stop? Stop what?" "Looking at me with those cute eyes-" You stopped in the middle of your sentence, gasping loudly. You covered your mouth with your hands, looking at him with a red face. "Did I just... say that...?" He smirked and nodded his head. "I can confirm that you did." You groaned into your hands embarrassed, now covering your entire face. You didn't want to face him after you just confessed that. How could you have said that?! "Hey, guess what?" he said lightly grabbing onto your wrists and lowering it from your face. "...What?" you muttered embarrassed. He pulled you towards him and kissed you passionately. You melted into the kiss. "That's for ditching me three years ago."

#clint barton #clint #barton #The Avengers #Avengers #clint barton x reader #clint x reader #imagine #oneshot #one shot #fanfic

[goffilolo]

Demise of Midoriya Izuku Part 8

God this was a long chapter. I hope you will enjoy it. you can read the full fanfic on ao3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/776826

I’m currently on a christmas break, however i have a very long essay to write so im not sure if ill be able to write/draw any more demise!au stuff.

Izuku was tired.

It was nothing new per se, as for the last month the teenager has become very well acquainted with the feeling of exhaustion as a side effect of his medication. “It’s normal” said Shin during their last appointment “Your brain is still going through an adjustment period, and insomnia is a rather common side effect of a lot of antidepressants”. So yeah, it was all good.

Except it wasn’t.

Given that no one was willing to rid the boy of his sleepless turmoil, Izuku decided to take the matters into his own hands. Because fuck Shin. In the hindsight, all of this was a very bad idea.

It all started during one of his usual conversations with Mrs. Todoroki, only this time they were joined by her daughter Fuyumi. The first observation Izuku made upon her entrance, was that this young woman was almost a splitting image of Mrs. Todoroki, save for the hot red streaks in her hair, undoubtedly inherited from her asshole father. After talking to her for a bit, Izuku was quite pleased to learn that she has not in fact inherited her father’s god tier assholism. Izuku has never met the man, he doesn’t need to, at least not yet.

After brief introductions they have resumed to their previous conversation.

“So how did meeting with piece of shit go?” asked Mrs. Todoroki, her question quickly followed by Fuyumi’s scandalised expression at hearing her mother use such foul language.

“Meh, it was your typical melodrama bullshit. Some shouting and insults were thrown around, well mostly by me, and crying” replied Izuku in a rather nonchalant fashion, completely disregarding Fuyumi’s shock and confusion.

The word got round quickly in this ward, meaning that most of the patients and staff were in on Izuku’s personal drama and so they all came to a silent agreement to refer to Bakugou as ‘piece of shit’ and never call him by his actual name. And so over time Bakugou became the psychiatric ward’s very own Voldemort. But Fuyumi doesn’t know that yet, bless her soul.

“You actually cried?”

“Oh no, not me, piece of shit did. Honestly you should’ve been there, Shin was there for emotional support and kept staring daggers at him, it was hilarious” sneered the boy upon remembering the Bakugou shitshow with some sort of twisted fondness. His enthusiasm was however quickly disrupted by a long, loud yawn coming the boy’s mouth.

“Didn’t get a good night’s sleep?” asked Fuyumi.

“More like a good month’s sleep” snapped Izuku, rubbing his temples as much as the bandage around his head allowed him to. “And that bitch Shin won’t prescribe me anything cause it would clash with my antidepressants” scoffed the boy.

“You know that Dr. Iyashi cares about your wellbeing and wouldn’t want to give you anything with nasty side-effects” said Mrs. Todoroki as she stroked Izuku’s shoulders in a gentle, matherly manner.

“Wait a minute” chimed in Fuyumi “Prescription won’t do, but what about over the counter stuff? There must be some sleep relief that you could take”.

“Oh, really?” said Izuku, with a hint of amusement and sarcasm “What are gonna do? Smuggle some Quil into the hospital for me?”

The determined  smile on Fuyumi’s face told Izuku that indeed, she would. ‘Well then’ thought Izuku ‘This is going to be fun’.

The next day Izuku has found two bottles being dropped onto his lap, while the boy was busy filling up his notebook with sketches of Endeavour being eaten alive by crocodiles. If you looked closely enough you’d also notice that some of them contained an already half eaten Bakugou.

He raised his brow at the bottles, then looked up to see Fuyumi looking very smug.

“I got the Quil” she said, very proud of herself.

“I can see that” replied Izuku, looking back and forth between the two bottles “Why two?” he asked, confusion and curiosity seeping into his voice.

“I forgot whether you needed DayQuil or NyQuil so I got you both!”

Looking at very pleased Fuyumi, Izuku didn’t have it in him to grace the statement with a proper reply that wouldn’t point out the stupidity and irresponsibility of casually getting two substances that are meant to do the exact opposite, which then lead to a train thought of ‘what if you mix them?’.

“Thank you Fuyumi-neesan!”

And thus Izuku was left alone in his hospital room, the notebook long forgotten, staring at the content of the two bottles, as the nerdy part of his brain deciding to wake up and cause drama. ‘If you mix DayQuil and NyQuil, you end up with what, ForeverQuil? Or given that the substances are meant to do the opposite would they cancel each other out and have no effect when consumed simultaneously? No, that doesn’t seem right, it’s more likely that they would disturb a sleeping pattern, but given that mine is already fucked, how would I be able to tell...’

“SHIT, I’m mumbling again!”

So many questions that demand to be answered, a hypothesis that needs a confirmation and a curiosity waiting around the corner, ready to kill the metaphorical cat.

“Ugh, fuck it” said Izuku as he gulped down both substances in one go.

That’s when everything went to shit.

At first he didn’t feel any different. He spent a good portion of time looking out of the window, admiring the weather - it’s almost May so the days were getting brighter, warmer - waiting for something, anything to happen.

Things got a bit blurry after a while. Izuku could feel his BRAIN getting blurry, which he didn’t even know was possible. But apparently losing contact with reality does things to you.

As Izuku slowly regained clarity, the first thing he noticed was the sluggish feeling and the pounding in his head, reminding him of the first time he woke up in this god forsaken loony bin.

The second thing he noticed was the darkness. At first, he thought that one of the nurses has closed the curtains while he was out of it, but no, the curtains were open, and upon closer inspection Izuku came to realisation that it was in fact, night time. Which was strange...to say the least, since it was still sunny just a few seconds ago. ‘Is this some sort of a quirk? Probably not.’ he thought, which meant there was only one option left.

“FUCKIN HELL I TRAVELLED THROUGH TIME!”

His shout was followed by a tired groan, which definitely did not belong to him.

“Dr. Iyashi, he’s at it again!” shouted Mrs. Todoroki.

Wait a minute, Mrs. Todoroki? When did she get here?

Izuku whipped his head to the side, where the woman was sitting in a chair by his bedside, with Shin standing in the doorway, looking down at a clipboard.

“What the-shit did you get in here?” asked Izuku, his brain still sluggish and disoriented about the whole situation.

Shin chooses that moment to walk into the room “Do you remember what happened?” he asked.

“No? I was sitting here and it was day and suddenly it’s night, so obviously it was Quil induced time travel” said Izuku, as his lagging brain allowed for all the ridiculous bullshit to spill out of his mouth.

Shin does not look impressed.

“You absolute, fucking idiot!” shouted the doctor “Why in the world would you mix DayQuil and NyQuil together? Are you completely insane? What did you think would happen?!”

“First of all, if I was sane I wouldn’t even be here. Second of all, who told you about my Quil?” asked the boy, his eyes suddenly focused, full of suspicion.

At that moment Fuyumi poked her head through the entrance and waved at Izuku as she made her way through the room and stood by her mother’s side.

“Sorry, I had to tell him since it’s all my fault you went delirious in the first place” she said, her face portraying nothing but guilt.

“It was very irresponsible of you!” said the doctor, his gaze switching between Izuku and Fuyumi “Not only did you take medication against a doctor’s recommendation, you even roped others into smuggling unauthorised substance into the hospital…”

And Shin went into the ‘ranting dad’ mode. It was a perfect time to zone out.

While the doctor was busy lecturing everyone about the dangers of overdosing and mixing medications, Izuku picked up the discarded notebook in hopes of finishing that sketch of Endeavour being devoured by crocodiles. His drawing skills were improving, that’s for sure. Maybe once he’s finished he’d show it to Mrs. Todoroki.

‘I think she would like that’ thought Izuku.

Except when he opened his notebook on the most recent page, instead of Endeavour massacre, Izuku was met with lines upon lines of text, written in what can only be described as very rushed and frenzied handwriting, which undeniably belonged to Izuku. The pages were also adorned with big bold letters at the top stating ‘ENDEAVOUR THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL’.

‘When did I write that?!’ Izuku was rather astonished as he started to skim through his writing and came to a conclusion that what he was reading was in fact a conspiracy theory. A very detailed one at that.

“Izuku, are you listening?” asked the doctor.

“No” he replied absentmindedly.

But the writing in his notebook and the overall situation left Izuku very confused. The moonlight illuminated parts of the room, a reminder of a mysterious time slip, which apparently was not quil induced time travel. Izuku needed the answers, and he needed them NOW.

“Can anyone tell me what happened?”

His question was met with a long, awkward silence, as the other individuals in the room looked at one another, not knowing what to say.

“Alright…” Mrs. Todoroki broke the silence “...where do we start?”

………………………………………………………………………………

Iyashi Shin was finally having his well deserved lunch break. After starting his shift at 6 am, he felt exhausted and he was barely halfway through. And so Shin planned to have a short nap during his break to recharge. ‘What am I, an old man?’ he thought to himself ‘Probably, at least I’m on a good way to becoming one. Not getting any younger either, I’m turning forty next year.’

‘Ugh, this calls for a mid-life crisis nap’ he thought while lying on the couch in his office, being slowly lulled to sleep by the ticking of the clock.

Suddenly Shin was awakened by an obnoxiously loud laugh coming from the corridor. He was annoyed at having his nap interrupted, but the annoyance was outweighed by sheer curiosity, as one does not get a lot of laughing in this part of the hospital.

The doctor soon  got up and opened the door he was once again met with the obnoxious laugh, only this time louder as it came from a man who was currently walking out of Izuku’s room.

“Haha...it was nice talking to you Midoriya. I’m glad you’re in a good mood” called out the man “I’ll be back tomorrow to check your homework!”

‘Homework? Ah, it must be Izuku’s teacher’ thought Shin with a bit of suspicion as he remembered his patient talking about his homeroom teacher in a … less than friendly manner.

‘So why would the laugh? I thought Izuku hated the guy.’

As the teacher walked away from Izuku’s room he bumped into Shin, who was standing in the middle of the corridor, lost in thought.

“Ah, Dr. Iyashi didn’t see you there!” exclaimed the teacher. He sure was in a good mood, a stark contrast to his usual visits.

“Good afternoon, how was your visit?” asked Shin, trying to squeeze out some details out of the man.

The teacher laughed again trying to get a hold of himself “Oh it was great, I haven’t laughed so much in ages. Whatever meds you put him on, they’re doing god’s work!”

“Really? What did Izuku say?”

“You know Bakugou-kun, right?”

“Of course, the one responsible for the shitstorm that is Izuku’s depression” stated the doctor as a matter of fact.

The teacher stilled his movement, unprepared for the blatant statement. Trying to dissolved the tension, he continued “Yeah, him. Anyways, Midoriya was asking about him and he seemed stuck on on his name so he said…” he stopped for a bit, trying to mimic his student’s voice and speaking manner “ ‘you know the angry, shouty one, what was his name...Fuckugou?’ and I just lost it right there! Buahaha!” sneered the teacher, waiting for Shin to have a similar reaction.

And boy was he not disappointed.

“Fuckugou!” exclaimed Shin “That’s a good one, gotta tell it to the nurses, it will spread like wildfire!”

………………………………………………………………………………

“Fuckugou?” asked Izuku.

“Fuckugou” confirmed Shin.

“That...is funny as hell, but it doesn’t really sound like me.”

“I know, which is why I was concerned. Mind you I still needed my nap, so I asked Mrs. Todoroki to keep an eye on you in the meanwhile” explained the doctor as both him and Izuku turned their heads in the direction of the white haired woman.

………………………………………………………………………………

Mrs. Todoroki was having a good day. And by good she meant boring. In all honesty there’s only so much a person can do in this place before being driven further into insanity. She was currently sitting in the common room in the company of her daughter who has dropped in earlier to give Izuku the sleeping medication they talked about yesterday.

Which is why she was more than a little surprised when Dr. Iyashi approached her, asking to keep an eye on Izuku, who right now should be sleeping like a baby from the medication.

Nevertheless she agreed, as the doctor seemed deeply concerned about the boy who has managed to settle himself nice and cosy in a particular place in her heart; reserved exclusively for her children. ‘Well then’ thought the woman as she came to a realisation ‘Looks like I now have five children.’

Just as Mrs. Todoroki considered brushing off Dr. Iyashi’s concerns, her train of thought was disrupted by a maniacal laugh that belonged to no other than Izuku himself.

The teenager in question wheeled himself into the common room at a speed that should not be achievable for a wheelchair, his hair wilder than usual, eyes wide open, pupils dilated. The boy’s face was devoid of any sanity.

“HOLY SHIT MRS. TODOROKI!” he screamed.

“Are you high?” she asked, full of disbelief at the state the boy was in.

“I got the answers” announced Izuku, completely disregarding the woman’s question.

“What answers?”

“All the answers! To everything! I CAN FEEL THE UNIVERSE EXPANDING IN MY BONES!” shouted Izuku, further disturbing and scaring other occupants of the room.

‘Oh, is this why Dr. Iyashi was concerned? What do I do with him?’

“Right…” said Mrs. Todoroki, hoping to distract the boy for a bit “...why don’t you sit with me and Fuyumi and tell us all the answers? Just remember to keep your voice down” she added in her motherly tone.

Although Izuku seemed quite out of contact with reality, he did as he was told. After wheeling himself next to Fuyumi he whipped out one of his notebooks seemingly out of nowhere and began to speak.

“From the evolutionary standpoint my existence is a liability to human advancement. Every year the number of people born quirkless decreases as our gener are to be replaced with the superior ones of those with quirks. I’m going extinct! Both my parents have quirks, yet I was born without one, I’m an anomaly I SHOULD CEASE TO EXIST!” screeched Izuku as he seemed to be having an existential crisis that was accompanied by what he thought were diagrams from his notebook, which to everyone besides him looked like a bunch of gibberish and nonsense.

“WHY DO I EXIST?” screamed the boy in agony as once again he began to wheel himself at an impossible speed out of the room.

The Todoroki women were left stunned, looking at one another and then back at the spot previously occupied by the insane teenager.

“What did you give him?” asked the mother.

“The Quil”

“What Quil?”

“All the Quil.”

“Go and get Dr. Iyashi. I’ll stay here in case Izuku comes back” she said while rubbing her temples out of frustration.

………………………………………………………………………………

“Oh, fuck, what happened after that?” asked Izuku, no longer in disbelief, but amusement. While he had no recollection of any of this happening he felt like he was listening to a rundown of an episode from ‘it’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia’.

He seemed to be the only one enjoying himself though. The adults in the room on the other hand were very much tired of his shit after having to deal with Quil induced Izuku the whole day.

“You wheeled yourself around the ward while screaming ‘I challenged God to a knife fight’. What actually happened was you stole a scalpel from a surgeon, don’t know how, and started stabbing one of the All Might sketches in your notebook” relayed Mrs. Todoroki in the most flat and no-bullshit tone she could manage.

“Haha, yeah that sounds like me!”

“Now then…” announced Shin as he stood up addressing everyone at once“...it’s been a long day for everyone. Mrs. Todoroki please go back to your room for today. Ms. Fuyumi, thank you for everything. I will see you again. Izuku, you little shit, we’re going to have a talk.”

As the two women got up and left the room, Izuku was left alone with his psychiatrist. While he knew that Shin was only concerned about his well being he didn’t look forward to being nagged by the doctor again.

Instead of talking, Shin just ripped of a piece of paper from his clipboard and handed it to Izuku without any explanation.

“Any what is this?” asked Izuku, eyeing the piece of paper suspiciously.

“ A prescription for Ramelteon” says Shin “It’s most commonly used as antidepressant, but it also works as a sleeping drug. It’s also one of very few that does not lead to a dependence. Take this to the dispensary now, they will sort everything out and you will be getting your dose from tomorrow evening onwards.”

“I know I was very reluctant to give you anything besides antidepressants…” he continues “...but I’d rather do this than have you going batshit crazy with whatever alternatives you’re willing to try. Please be careful in the future Izuku, I mean it” he finishes with a warning tone.

“Can’t promise anything” said Izuku, his voice full of mischief.

“In that case I can’t promise that I won’t smack you on the head next time you pull of shit like this” replied the doctor, as he walked out of his patient’s room, hiding his smile behind the clipboard.

#bnha #boku no hero academia #demise!au #fanfic #demise of midoriya izuku #chapter 8 #midoriya izuku #iyashi shin #mrs. todoroki #todoroki fuyumi

[foxhenki-blog]

Of Eclipses and Entanglement

I've double-down on armchair magic lately, being overwhelmed with these strong feelings that practice at this moment in cosmic time will not be beneficial to me. I'm am tearing through Peter Levenda's 'The Dark Lord', and am surprised by its readability. You need to be an excellent writer to turn material this fringe and academic into such an easy read. As is the way of things, The Dark Lord has led me to other books. I've purchased my first copy of the Simonomicon and The Voudon Gnostic Workbook (which I had never heard of and am really very impressed by, its huge and the content is intense). I have a fond memory of being, maybe fifteen, and picking up the paperback version of the Necronomicon by Simon up in, I think, a Waldenbooks. My mighty teenage brain scoffed at it at the time, this isn't real, Lovecraft made that book up. Who is this guy pretending to write that horrific and fictitious book. How my practice might be advanced if I had picked it up...

I have been practicing a bit, reciting the invocation to the astrological decan and the daily planetary spirits in the morning following some active imagination exercises. The Decan for the time leading right up to the eclipse this Monday is visualized as a man with the head of a crocodile, holding up one hand and holding a vial in the other. I found this out only very recently, after beginning the bonus Decans course given to Rune Soup premium members. The course details a very long and detailed ritual, but as soon as I began reading through some of the visualizations of the decans, I knew that I had to perform it. You see, that man with the crocodile head, I dreamt of him several weeks before I received the information provided in the Rune Soup course.

 This wasn't just any dream, either. It was a dream directly connected with the rituals I performed back in May in San Francisco, at the Mission of Saint Dolores in in the adjacent cemetery. I had made a promise to the dead of that place, the only cemetery within San Francisco's city limits, that I would help them to not be forgotten.

My sister-in-law lives in the city and has some decent occult street cred herself, including her latest art fashion initiative - Handfast Hotel. She came to pay a visit and we were able to exchange a few words between me chasing my kids around, and I got a handshake in as well. A day or two after she had left for other adventures, I had the dream.

I was in the original Mission Dolores chapel, but instead of the bright paint and warm wood, everything was white. A woman whose face was obscured by hair and the white sheet she was wrapped in was laid down on one of the pews. She was whispering and I bent in to hear what she was saying, but at that very moment the chapel changed and was filled with people. I stood up, as did the woman in the white sheet.

Every pew was filled, I was near the front, and every body there was kneeling and standing and sitting in unison, although there was no priest at the pulpit. I couldn't see anyone's face but as I looked around I came to the startling realization that they were all ghosts. As soon as I recognized their nature, they began to reveal their faces. One man in particular turned and headed back down the aisle. I remember his face, human but slightly off, his eyes off center and crossed. I fixated on him and my fear grew, which is when all of the lights went out.

The pews gone, I was still in the chapel but now I am on a bare, I kid you not, Hellraiser-style mattress surrounded by glitter and with the woman, it is so dark that I still can't see her, just a couple of feet away. Horrible dog-sized spiders come out of the shadows and I beat at them with the white sheet she was wrapped in. Realizing. My weapon of choice was ineffective, I reach back, grab the hand of the mystery woman, and run for the double oak doors of the church. I turn half-way and the giant spiders are in pursuit. I yell, and I remember this very clearly:

"I AM UNAFRAID!"

And slam my palms on the ground, which enacts a powerful earthquake. The floor shaking in waves, glitter fills the air, and the spiders are knocked back. I turn back to the door and there he is, or at least, there is his black-on-black form, a giant man with the head of a crocodile. Emboldened by my act of battle magic I charge for him, and he for me. The last I remember, this powerful being is easily wrestling me to the ground.

It is difficult to be a student of Lovecraft and not place a great deal of stock in the world of dreams. Whether it was the handshake with the local artist or something else that triggered it doesn't matter. The coordination with the crocodile-headed Decan and the coming eclipse was too much for me to ignore. The Decan, like so many of Lovecraft's antagonists, is guarding a barrier or door through which I (the hero in this dream) need to find my way through.

Lovecraft was a lifelong astronomy enthusiast, and as such, was an avid watcher of celestial events. I have found record of two total solar eclipses that he viewed. The first in the winter of 1925 he saw from a rooftop in Brooklyn. You can actually watch the same event on YouTube, if you can believe that. The silent film taken of that eclipse can be seen below:

The second record I found of Lovecraft experiencing a total eclipse was in 1931, outside the town of Newburyport, MA. I found his account of the experience here, from a letter he wrote to James F. Morton the following month, and have included it below for the reader's reference:

   “We reached Bossy Gillis’s burg long before the eclipse started, and chose an hilltop meadow with a wide view—near the northern end of High Street—as our observatory.  The sky was mottled, and naturally we were damn anxious—but the sun came out every little while and gave us long glimpses of the waxing spectacle.  The aspect of the land skip did not change in tone until the solar crescent was rather small, and then a kind of sunset vividness became apparent.  When the crescent waned to extreme thinness, the scene grew strange and spectral—an almost deathlike quality inhering in the sickly yellowish light.  Just about that time the sun went under a cloud,and our expedition commenced cursing in 33-1/3 different languages including Ido.  At last, though, the thin thread of the pre-totality glitter emerged into a large patch of absolutely clear sky.  The outspread valleys faded into unnatural night—Jupiter came out in the deep-violet heavens—ghoulish shadow-bands raced along the winding white clouds—the last beaded strip of glitter vanished—and the pale corona flicker’d into aureolar radiance around the black disc of the obscuring moon.  We were seeing the real show!  Though Newburyport was by no means close to the line of maximum duration, the totality lasting for a surprisingly lone time—long enough for the impression to sink ineffaceably in.  It would have been foolish if we had gone up to the crowded central line in Maine or New Hampshire.  The earth was darken’d much more pronouncedly than in our marrow-congealing ordeal of ’25, (the coldness of this damn train takes my memory back to that harrowing occasion!) tho’ the corona was not so bright.  There was a suggestion of a streamer extending above and to the left of the disc, with a shorter corresponding streamer below and to the right.  We absorb’d the whole exhibition with open eyes and gaping mouths—I chalking down II whilst Khul-i-N’hari had to be content withI.  Too bad about youse poor one-eclipse guys!  Finally the beaded crescent reemerged, the valleys glow’d again in faint, eerie light,and the various partial phases were repeated in reverse order.  The marvel was over, and accustom’d things resum’d their wonted sway.”

There is one prominent eclipse in Lovecraft's story, 'The Other Gods'. There are threads between The Other Gods and his story Celephais. The protagonist, one Barzai the Wise, is a magician and mystic that is on a quest to view the 'Gods of Earth' that have long since hidden themselves from man. It is mentioned that they were driven up the mountains and into the clouds by a war with man, which brings to mind the brief mention of King Kynaratholis from the story Celephais. The other tendril is the Other Gods vehicle of travel, cloud ships, the same piloted by Captain Athib.

There are two more entries into the dream library of Lovecraft's lost books here, namely the 'Seven Encrypted Books of Hsan' and what is referred to as the Pnakotic Manuscript, which is recorded as holding the epic of a hero by the name of Sansu.

Another thread that I have yet to pull on is a passing reference to black cats and a trip they all take somewhere on St. John's Eve. I'll leave this one here for now, I have a feeling it is significant.

Barzai and his assistant Atal travel a long ways to a mountain called Hatheg-Kla, the last place known to be visited by the Other Gods. The stories, of which Barzai is steeped in, state that when the moon is full and the summit of Hatheg-Kla is obscured by mist, the Other Gods have again set foot on the Earth. There is a line Lovecraft gives us here that I really like:

"Mists are the memory of Gods..."

Barzai climb the mountain and wait for four days until they are rewarded with a night where strange mists grow deep on the nearby summit. Barzai takes off after his quarry, leaving Atal (and the reader who can now only see from the assistant's perspective) trailing behind, listening to his ravings in the clouds ahead. This is the point where the eclipse is mentioned:

"The moon is dark, and the gods dance in the night; there is terror in the sky, for upon the moon hath sunk an eclipse foretold in no books of men or of earth's gods... There is unknown magic on Hatheg-Kyla, for the screams of the frightened gods have turned to laughter, and the slopes of ice shoot up endlessly into the black heavens whither I am plunging... Hei! Hei! At last! In the dim light I behold the gods of earth!"

At this point, for me, so many threads are entangled I am left only with a kind of spiritual Gordian Knot.

Listen to Barzai's warnings:

"The other gods! The other gods! The gods of the outer hells that guard the feeble gods of earth!... The vengeance of the infinite abysses... That cursed, that damnable pit... Merciful gods of earth, I am falling into the sky!"

Here I am, again facing the void, this scene is so familiar to me now, at this writing, because I've witnessed it very recently on David Lynch's Twin Peaks, the sky opening, the hero falling upwards into a world of chaos, madness, and secrets...

The best correlation in the tarot for the story of the Other Gods is the Two of Coins. With one disk obscuring the other, the Two of Coin’s conventional analysis is that all roads are closed, that great difficulty will come and the protagonist will find themselves in a state of being impeded, obstructed, or entangled. The mental landscape painted by this archetype is not unlike Lovecraft's view during the eclipse, with deep-violet heavens and ghoulish shadow-bands racing along winding white clouds above a stark white chapel. Inside the chapel, as I wrestle with my astrological difficulty in an attempt to, like Thomas Malone of Red Hook, break through the door that entraps me, inside this space the last beaded strip of glitter has vanished beneath my palm.

This aligns with my dream of the crocodile-headed Decan. It aligns with my magical nadir since the last new moon and my insights into the nature of power in magic. It aligns with my choice to not seek or petition or demand anything from terrestrial spirits until after the eclipse. Barzai serves as a warning to those that push a barrier that is fated by the mechanics of the universe to be closed.

#tarot #twin peaks #peter levenda #necronomicon #astrology #astronomy