#listen this is why you butter and flour your pans super well

[bo-bo-bean]

Memories

Memories

Zuke pulled out the tray of chocolate chip cookies from the oven, giving them a sniff and turning one over with a spatula. A beautiful light pecan covered the bottom of each one, chewy on the outside, soft and fluffy on the inside. They were puffed up as if air was inflated into each one. Already, the smell was haunting the sewers, set aside the typical sewer and sweat scent.

“Cookies are done!?” Mayday eagerly asked, sitting on the couch on her knees.

“They need to cool,” he told her, going to sit next to her. With a whine, she sighed as Zuke grunted as he took place on the couch, leaning back. Mayday, always enthusiastic. Zuke, quite the opposite. But he never opposed to baking and cooking. It always brought a… joy to him.

He began to wonder about ways to improve the recipe, but nothing could change. He didn’t want it to change.

“Zuke!” Mayday called. Zuke looked over with a confused look. “Hey did ya hear me?”

“About the cookies?” he tipped his head. Mayday scoffed. As cool as Zuke is, he sure is absent-minded. But she smiled and asked her question again.

“I asked how you cooked so well…! Like ever since we met, you made all sorts of recipes! Chicken rendang, Ikan Bakar, Nasi Lemak, all sorts of foods! So like… what, did you have baking class in college?”

“Eh, no not really,” he shook his head. “But you can say I had a teacher.”

“Was it Eve?” she wondered, plopping down to listen to a tale she would be ready for.

“Nah, she always went out to eat. No… it was West,” he smiled. “When we were kids, mom and dad were out a lot, so he and I cooked. A lot. He taught me a lot and it was fun.”

“Ooooh, man! The bros cooking and rapping!”

“Eh, only he was rapping,” he softly chuckled. “But… it was the best memory I have with him. Still is…”

And soon, Zuke’s mind wandered to young him wearing an oversized hoodie, hair tied back, going to his brother. West was wearing a tank top with baggy orange jeans, humming as he was setting out some ingredients. It was nearly two in the morning.

“Weessstt…” he groggily groaned. “Go to bed…”

“I’m hungry…!” Little West shrugged with a chuckle. Zuke rubbed the sleepiness out of his eyes, pushed a chair next to his brother, climbed on, and looked. West had a recipe book open and ingredients all about. Flour, sugar, eggs, salt, vanilla, measuring spoons, cups, butter, brown sugar. Whatever it was, Zuke assumed it was going to be sweet.

“So where’s mom and dad?”

“Out,” West replied nonchalantly. Zuke huffed at the answer, but curiosity got the better of him when he saw the recipe book. He couldn’t read yet, but the picture showed cookies.

“You’re making cookies?” he asked, a little perked up.

“Yeah!” he beamed with pride. “Figured it’s worth a shot to make! And I always wanted to!”

Zuke looked at the counter, then the book, then his older brother.

“Can I help?”

West nodded and got aprons for both of them. Zuke tied his around his waist, West one around his shoulders.

“The best way to remember recipes is to make them memorable…!” he pointed out, raising a whisk in the air and spinning it a bit. Zuke couldn’t help his excitement as his fingers drummed on the counter. “So what if we made a rap about it?”

“Haha…! Okay…! I’ll keep the beat!” Zuke announced, holding two wooden spoons. With his brother’s agreement, West clapped his hands, breathed in, and sang with silliness intended.

“Time to bake, it’s cookie baking time! Watch and learn as I teach you in rhyme!”

Zuke giggled, ready to follow his brother’s instructions. “First the dry, pour the sugar and the flour!”

“Flower?” Zuke looked confused. But when he saw West measure it out, he understood. He took the cups and poured them into the bowl carefully, tongue sticking out in concentration. West looked at the book, eyes widened but continuing his song.

“Almost forgot! Preheat the oven for an hour!”

West quickly did that, Zuke keeping an even pace on a saucepan. “Mix mix mix until they all have met…!”

Zuke took the whisk as he stirred everything together. He looked down, thinking, but gained a smile when West put a thumb up. “Put that aside,” he put the bowl away to have a clear space. “Let’s get the others set! Cracking eggs, melt the butter please…!”

Zuke quickly got off the chair and put the butter in the microwave to soften. He watched his brother crack eggs on the side of the bowl and put the yolk and whites in. Zuke scrambled back on, holding his hands out.

“I wanna try!”

West let him. Zuke took the egg, took careful aim… and smashed it on the side of the bowl. It oozed on the table, eggshells sticking to his hands. He gasped, but a loving arm was put around his shoulders and then West’s hands put his fingers on Zuke’s tiny hands, leading him to cracking an egg and carefully put it in.

“Add vanilla, put your taste buds at ease…!” West added a dash of vanilla, then looked back at the book. They were both covered with flour at this point. “Douse some oil, don’t be too greedy!”

West measured the oil and let Zuke pour it in. “Chocolate chunks, only if you’re needy!”

They both sampled the chocolate chunks before putting them in, West more than Zuke, earning a slight scold from the drummer boy. He laughed it off as West brought the bowls together. “Whisk whisk, stir, stir, combine and mix!”

Zuke held the bowl as his brother slowly added the dry ingredients in slowly and letting him mix before his arms got tired, to which West took over. “Butter the pan, use the whole stick!”

He let Zuke take that one since he was busy mixing. Once the pan was completely covered in butter, they both molded little spheres and put them on the sheet. The oven beeped, ready for the next lyric. “Shove the sheet in the oven, slam it shut!”

They both did so, wearing oven mitts to protect them from the heat. West put a timer on the stove, letting it tick down. “Set the timer, not too soon, no shortcuts…!”

While waiting, West scatted and sang as Zuke banged to the beat, laughing as they cleaned up the area. They were both a mess, but the kitchen was spotless as soon as the timer rang. West pulled out the sheet, putting it on the counter. “Here’s a secret, let me put you to a halt…! When out and hot and super soft, add a pinch of salt…!”

West added some salt to the top of each cookie. Zuke was confused but went with it. West was the chef, not him. “I know you’re eager, drooling at this rate,” West put a hand over his shoulder. “But be patient, let them cool and all we have to do is wait… wait… wait…”

They both stared at the pan in silence. Zuke’s stomach rumbled, his mouth turning into a river at this point. After fifteen minutes, West nodded and they both grabbed a handful, going upstairs after leaving a note for their parents, and getting into bed together. They nibbled and giggled until their bellies were full.

“I can see why you added salt,” Zuke giggled, yawning and leaning on his brother.

“Brings the sweetness out…! The book said so…!”

Zuke smiled, his eyes fluttering shut. Zuke smiled fondly at the memory.

“Awwwww!” Mayday squealed. You two are so cute together!!”

“Ah! I’m not cute…!” he grumbled. “The cookies should be done now.”

He got the plate and they both took a bite. Sweet, airy, fluffy. He sighed out, eyes closed, a smile on his face. “Yeah… best teacher I had.”

@nsr-simp

#DK West #Mayday #Zuke #NSR #No Straight Roads

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Okay so Sooga can't cook. But can Master Kohga cook? And would he try to teach Sooga, for a bit of domestic fluff goodness??

Imma make this as fluffy as I can for you, anon! I’m gonna be SUPER busy, so some asks will probably be on the back burner. Having said that, Imma dip into these when I can because you guys have SUCH good ideas?? 

Also It’s not that Sooga can’t cook, he just can’t cook WELL. Stuff is always off with his cooking. Too salty, too sweet, undercooked, SOMETHING. Kohga is picky so he notices. Either way, let’s GO!

“Urbosa! Get over here!”

Kohga (as well as the champions) had been spending all day together in the kitchen (upon prompting from Zelda), and Kohga had more or less commanded the cooking area. When Kohga wasn’t busy killing people or sleeping, he was being a rather pleasant company to have around. He started off by making drinks, and Sooga offered to help. Which was apparently a bit of a mistake. Urbosa sighed as she left the table, and walked behind the counter. Kohga motioned to two cups.

“You try one, and tell me which one has alcohol in it.”

Urbosa tried one, then another, lightly shaking her head.

“One on the left? Right one tastes just like juice.”

Kohga motioned wildly to the cups, as if they made a scientific discovery.

“Ha! See, that’s the thing! BOTH do! Somehow!”

“I...don’t put enough alcohol, that’s the hint I’m getting.”

“No matter how many times I shove MY dick in THAT ass, he makes drinks like a FUCKING virgin! You know what, get a fucking apron on, I’m teaching you how to be competent in the kitchen. You can’t JUST have a top notch cock, you dumbshit.”

Kohga turned around to get them both an apron, and Urbosa chuckled at his puzzled reaction.

“Hey, he does have a point. Everyone should learn how to cook. Besides, him being this upset just means he really loves you.”

“Don’t you DARE make me out to be mushy, Urbosa!”

Kohga walked back up to them, throwing a pink apron at Sooga’s face. Urbosa chuckled as Kohga put his own on. It was clear she was right, but the relationship was still new to him, so he was still in denial of his feelings. Urbosa grabbed one of the drinks (Kohga’s, obviously), and shrugged.

“I’ll just be taking this then, carry on love birds.”

Kohga lifted a finger to retort, before Urbosa turned around and joined Daruk back at the table. Kohga waved her off, muttering something under his breath. Sooga couldn’t help but smile.

“You’re just charming, Master Kohga.”

“Save the sweet for the cooking, tits mcgee.”

Kohga patted his left tit, before going to the sink and washing his hands, Sooga following suit.

“So? What will we be making?”

“Good question. What do you WANT to make?”

“Hmm...what’s something YOU like?”

“Kiss ass.”

Kohga chuckled, drying his hands with a towel. Sooga honestly just lived for Kohga, and it was terribly sweet of him.

“Alright, let’s do crepes with fried bananas.”

Sooga nodded, more than confident enough to prove himself. Kohga dug into the cabinets to grab everything (with help from Sooga. Tall bastard), before Kohga put two bowls in front of them.

“Now, follow me. We’re gonna add a cup of the tabantha flour. Then, a tablespoon of sugar.”

“I always thought it was a cup of both.”

“No wonder you always burn those fuckers- that much sugar burns it, you dumbshit. Now, not everyone does this, but they SHOULD. Add some salt, help balance out. If you think a food doesn’t need SOME salt, you’re wrong.”

Sooga nodded along, carefully listening and following his instructions, as if this was a training session. 

“How did you learn all this?”

“Mom taught me. She loved cooking, but she worked hard, so sometimes she was too tired to cook. When I got older, I ended up doing the cooking around the house. You only get better the more you do it. Except YOUR drinks, you’re hopeless.”

“Like my love for you.”

“Iean down, imma smack you upside the head.”

Sooga chuckled, watching his little master grumble to himself. Kohga took out another bowl, and added milk, as well as an egg.

“Now. You mix the wet and the dry together.”

“Why not just do it all together to begin with?”

“Lumps, you get lots of ‘em if you do that.”

Sooga nodded, watching as Kohga mixed the ingredients in their separate bowls. Sooga could watch Kohga cook all day, if he let him. Sooga copied Kohga as they mixed the dry and wet together, whisking it till it was nice and liquidy.

“It’s supposed to be this liquidy?”

“Yeah, any thicker and it’s a pancake. Now, we’re gonna put this in the fridge for as long as we can, get some flavor out of it.”

“What do we do while we wait?”

Sooga took the bowls, and put them in the fridge, just in time to catch Kohga grabbing bananas and putting them on a cutting board.

“We prep everything else. This should be easy for you. I need you to cut all these in little squares. And listen to me while I show you what I’m doing, but be careful.”

“Afraid I’ll cut myself?”

Sooga grinned as he peeled the bananas, starting to cut. One thing Sooga was VERY good at in the kitchen, was cutting. Always clean, always uniform. Kohga dug into the bag of sugar that he had at his side, and tossed a bit towards Sooga’s apron. Wasteful? A bit, but Sooga’s dumb smile was getting on his nerves.

“If you don’t, at this point I will. Now, I’m gonna throw some butter in this pan, and we’re gonna add the bananas here soon as you’re done. This, and some whipped cream, is gonna be our filling.”

“Doesn’t it burn if it’s hot?”

“If you actually know how it works, no.”

Sooga was careful not to cut himself as he watched Kohga throw butter, sugar, and some spices onto the pan. He watched as the sugar browned slightly, and Kohga motioned for Sooga to pour the fruit in. Once it was inside, Kohga handed him the spatula.

“Now, keep mixing it. Don’t change the temp, don’t let it sit.”

Sooga watched as Kohga grabbed a bag of acorns and chickaloo tree nuts. He cracked them surprisingly effortlessly in his hands, quickly and efficiently separating the shells from the insides. Sooga found it hard to pay attention to the pan, and his Master’s hands. How did hands so soft and lovely make such hard work look so easy?

“Is that going in the batter?”

“No, with the bananas. Adds some crunch, and a little bit of sweet.”

Kohga’s arm pushed against him as he added the nuts to the pan, motioning for Sooga to keep going. 

“Now, this is just how I like it, but we’re gonna add a swig of apple juice. Adds a BIT of tart, because this is going to be sweet as hell. Especially since we’re gonna add a touch of rum, to taste.”

“...Master Kohga?”

“Don’t tell me I lost you already, big guy.”

“Just in your eyes, Master Kohga.”

Kohga looked up at him, and reached his hand up, pushing him away a bit.

“You are SO mushy. No wonder you can’t cook right, you’re too busy ogling me all damn day.”

“You make it quite hard to focus.”

He chuckled. He kept mixing, as he was instructed. Kohga added butter to the pan, shaking his head at Sooga’s stupidity. He was just, such a lovestruck idiot. Once the butter started to lightly bubble, Kohga dug into the fridge, bringing out the batter.

“Okay, let’s start the important part. You can turn that off, cover it with the pot lid. I’m gonna let you do the first one. Three tablespoons into the pan.”

Kohga gave him the proper pouring tool, and Sooga obeyed. He was about to ask what to do next, when Kohga held onto his hand, helping him turn the pan. Sooga could chuckle like a lovesick fool right now, honestly. He really did have nice, soft hands, and Sooga wanted to hold them forever.

“Tilt to get it everywhere. Nice and slow, get it everywhere. Three minutes, then flip. Anymore and it’s like eating a damn ear. Speaking of ears, are you listening?”

“To every word, Master Kohga. Every single, solitary word.”

Kohga turned to look at him, finally seeing why he sounded more stupid than usual. He was SWOONING. Literally looking at him, and SWOONING like an idiot. Kohga scoffed, flipping the crepe for him.

“Alright, then listen to this. See how it’s got a nice, brown crust? We want it kinda crispy.”

Kohga let Sooga ogle him for three minutes, before finally taking it out of the pan, setting it onto a table.

“Taste it.”

“You?”

“W-no, the crepe you dingbat!”

Even Kohga had to chuckle at that. It’s why Kohga never let his ass watch him cook, it was just. All of this. They split the crepe, and Sooga nodded.

“You’re truly wonderful, Master Kohga. It’s lovely.”

“Good. Now, you’re turn, all by yourself.”

Kohga was going to step back, but Sooga’s puppy dog eyes kept him standing right there. Sooga added the batter to the pan, carefully turning the mixture till it coated the whole pan. He waited the three minutes, before flipping it. Kohga nodded in approval.

“Good crust, good crust. Keep it going.”

And that’s exactly what he did. Kohga sat there, watching his Sooga make crepe after crepe, and Kohga couldn’t help but chuckle. He was constantly asking if it was okay, constantly peering over him for approval. Honestly, if Kohga told this man to get him a piece of the moon, Sooga wouldn’t hesitate to reach for the stars. Soon enough, there wasn’t any mix left, in turn, leaving quite a stack of crepes. Kohga flipped through the stack, nodding.

“Better. Though some are a bit darker than others. We’ll work on that. Now, best part.”

Kohga placed one on the plate, added a hefty dollop of cream and honey, then folded it into a nice triangle like shape. Sooga watched him carefully, clearly wanting it to be perfect. Kohga folded another with cream and honey, then another. His usual was three at a time, but he might just have more (to support Sooga of course). He topped it off with the banana mixture, and dusted it with powdered sugar, just to make it look good. Sooga followed his stead, though he didn’t do it so cleanly. Folding it was hard for him apparently, causing him to get whipped cream all over his fingers, and even on his mask. It was a sloppy plate, but it was Sooga’s plate. Kohga shook his head once he saw the state of Sooga.

“For the love of- get over here, idiot.”

Kohga grabbed a hold of his face, wiping the cream off of his mask. Sooga sat there, letting him do so with such loving eyes. It was totally gross, in a sweet way.

“Master Kohga?”

“If the question is ‘am I an idiot’, then absolutely.”

Sooga chuckled, lightly shaking his head.

“I just...thank you. I enjoy listening to you when you teach. You love what you do, and there’s something so absolutely beautiful about that.”

“Yeah yeah...well. I like teaching you. You’re eager to learn.”

“I’m eager for YOU, Master Kohga.”

“Well geez Sooga, I know I’m pretty sweet, but-”

Before Kohga could finish his retort, Sooga suddenly lifted him off the floor, lifting their masks up a bit, and kissing him, right in his gorgeous lips. Was it a bit much, nearly throwing Kohga onto the counter and leering over him to kiss him? Absolutely, but neither seemed to care in the slightest. Just for a minute, they were there in an embrace, as sweet as sweet could be. Totally ignoring the table of people just a few feet away. Daruk lightly coughed, trying to ignore the fact that Sooga’s tight grip on his Master’s ass was smearing whipped cream everywhere.

“I...don’t think we’re gonna be eatin’ anything any time soon.”

#asks #kohga #sooga #urbosa #listen #Sooga is just #so in love with Kohga #he has in fact #had dreams of Kohga being a lil wife and cooking big meals for his future family #its adorable #he asks for so little

[daisyannewinchester]

I MADE COOKIES

HI THESE ARE MY QUARANTINE COOKIES

Imma tell yall how to make them. It’s super easy and they are soooooo good. I get compliments all the time on them. It’s an old recipe that is really my go to. I can crank the dough out in about the time it takes for me to listen to the full the Amazing Devil album The Horror and The Wild. Which also is great dance-around-the-kitchen music. So keep that in mind. Recipe under the cut for anyone who wants some. 

ok so... you wanna start off by grabbing two sticks of salted butter. Leave those in the window sill, you want them nice and soft for your dough. If you don’t have salted, you can use unsalted, then just add a bit of salt later on.

Then you gotta get 1 3/4 cup all purpose flour, 1 teaspoon baking soda, 1/4 teaspoon kosher salt (table salt if you will) (if you use unsalted butter then put a 1/2 tsp) and a 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon. And mix all that shit together with a whisk... or a fork... or a spoon.... or your hands if you really want (for all you kinetic people it feels really cool. Just make sure you wash your hands and that they are super dry before you stick them in) in a medium bowl. This is not your final bowl! You will not make your dough in this bowl so don’t worry too much about the size. Just set that all to the side while we get out wet ingredients together. Hum along to Marbles as you work. Or whatever your whisking song is. 

Then your gonna get your wet ingredients together. Altho idk why I call it wet. It’s butter and sugar. Sugar is dry. Oh well. So you might wanna heat up your butter a bit. Put it in a bowl first. I do it in one minute increments on power level 3 in the microwave. You want it to be super soft. If you end up melting the whole thing that’s totally ok don’t freak out. but try to aim for super soft/melted on the edges.

Pick your Final Bowl and put 1 cup of light brown or dark brown sugar. Doesn’t matter what kind. Dark Brown will be more mapley. So one cup of that and 3/4 cup regular white sugar. Put the sugar in the Final Bowl then the 2 sticks of butter on top. Lick your fingers after you touch the butter. Then wash your hands. Get a blender of some sort. you can use one of those fancy mixers if you want. I use a hand blender thingy. Do a little spinny twirl thing. You look cute. You’re doing great babe. One of the ones with two beaters on the end. You’re gonna wanna blend the two together until they’re mixed very well. Get two large eggs. Chef time. So try and find the coolest way to crack those eggs. I like to smack the egg on the counter until it bleeds. you can also smack it on the edge of the bowl, stab it with a knife or spank it with a spoon. Anything works really. Add one egg and beat it in. Add the other. Don’t do two at once. Idk what would happen but my mom told me that was a Big No. I’m too scared to find out. So one at a time. Then add 2 tsp of vanilla extract. Mix that in until just incorporated. 

Now comes the tricky part. You gotta add your dry stuff to your Final Bowl of wet stuff. I do half at a time. So pour half your flour mixture then kinda fold/hand stir it into your wet. You wanna do that so you don’t create a flour mushroom cloud in your kitchen and get flour on every surface... not that I’ve done that. so beat that in until it’s mostly mixed. 

Sing about wolves and bleating and bearing claws and ripping ribcages open to devour what’s truly yours... which are gonna be these cookies. They gonna be so good. 

Do the other half of your flour, dont forget to fold it in first. Once that’s all done you’re gonna wanna get 1 1/4 cup old fashioned oats. You can see in the pick the kind i get. I like to get the quick oats (not pictured, i didnt have any) If you dont have any quick oats you can grind some up barely in a coffee grinder. You can also just use whole oats. Whatever tickles your fancy. So you wanna add those in and 2 cups of chocolate chips. Milk or Dark. I prefer dark. Eat a few of the chocolate chips. You’ve earned it babe. So mix those in. I use a spoon cuz my beaters kinda weak. NOW YOUR DONE WITH YOUR DOUGH. TASTE TEST. FUCK EGG POISONING OR WHATEVER TAKE A BIG OL SPOONFUL AND EAT IT ALL. ITS SO GOOD. FUCK YEA BABE YOU DID IT. SO PROUD OF YOU.

Now preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Convection bake. Get two cookie sheets. Line them with parchment paper. NOT WAX PAPER THAT IS DIFFERENT. Then, depending on the size of the cookie sheet, make balls of dough and distribute them on the sheet. Leave abt 2 inches between each ball. But it really depends on the size of the dough balls. If you want big ass cookies make big ass balls and spread them farther apart. I recommend getting a spoon (like a tea spoon. but not a teaspoon. just a regular ol spoon) and scoop that dough out into slightly smaller than ping pong ball size. Line em up on the sheet like sheep for slaughter and wave to them as they go into the oven. Only put in one sheet at a time, you want an assembly like thing going. 

 Set a timer for about 10-15 minutes. This really depends on the kind of stove you have so make sure and watch your first batch carefully. while you’re waiting, replay your favorite Amazing Devil song and line a portion of your counter in parchment paper. You wanna take them out when they start to brown on the edges. It’s ok if they still look gooey in the middle that means they’re delish. replace with the other sheet of cookies and set your timer for however long it took. Set the whole cooked tray on a cooling rack and grab the salt. You wanna do this part while the cookies are still hot so the salt sticks. Sprinkle just a bit more on top of all your cookie. Salt to taste. You don’t have to salt if you don’t wanna. It’s up to you.

Let the cookies cool and they will continue baking a bit on the pan. Once they cool enough, remove them from the pan and place on parchment paper. Line empty tray with new balls and await for timer to go off. Worship our Fae King and Queen with a celebratory cookie dance. Try one of the cookies. They’re really good. Swap out the trays when they’re done and keep going until you’re finished! YOU HAVE NOW MAKE QUARANTINE COOKIES. ENJOY AND EAT THEM ALL RN. GO. RN. 

#cookies #recipe #recipes #cookie recipe #quarantine cookies #cooking #baking #daisy discusses #daisy cooks #occasionally #daisy loves cookies #the amazing devil #a great band to dance around the kitchen to #joey batey #madeleine hyland #cookie nom noms #enjoy!

[ikesenlemonadestandstories]

Like Butter

Come one, come all to Admin T’s Birthday Extravaganza!  (which, subsequently, is the tag you can use to search for all of the stories)

Welcome to day six. Almost there! This week long party continues has been graced by Masamune! As stated in the update post earlier, linked here, I will have a short uploaded every day leading up to my birthday. So feel free to check out who’s next.

*Casual side note about this one. You have no idea how I agonized over the creation of vanilla extract...and how to substitute baking powder/soda, yikes folks, finally figured out a way around it though!*

Thanks for stopping in, I hope you enjoy the read! All of my other Ikésen works can be found on my Master List, feel free to drop by anytime. My door’s always open.

A super big shout out and thank you to @naiyabladesinger​ for all the beta work done on these! Fixing my run on sentences is a monster task!

Also tagging @little-mini-me-world​.

Not to keep you waiting!

Like Butter - Masamune

You spent two hours explaining the ingredients for a cake you were familiar with to Masamune. Taking extra care to be describe their texture and taste to help him find the Sengoku alternative. You sent Masamune off with a list, trusting him on his own, but you were starting to get worried. He had been gone for almost half the day and you were starting to wish you had gone with him. Instead you stood in the kitchen near this time period’s equivalent of an oven, stoking the fire, making sure it didn’t go out. You weren’t sure what 350 degrees Fahrenheit looked like but, you were confident you could eyeball it.

Masamune all but crashed into the kitchen moments later.

“Alright lass, I hope this is everything, because I don’t think they’ll let me back there for a while.”

“Why? What happened? Are you okay?” I rushed over to help him with the baskets of ingredients

“Of course I’m fine, I just cleared out all of the European stock...you said this stuff is commonplace in your time?”

“Yup~” you answered musically as you got several different sized ceramic bowls out.

“Alright then Kitten, let’s do this.” He said as he clapped his hands together.

Masamune cracked six large eggs into a bowl and started mixing them together with the yuzu juice. You eyeballed about three cups of sugar and flour, two tablespoons of salt, and zest from two yuzu into another. Butter sat in a third, larger bowl, softening, as milk boiled in a ceramic container on the fire.

You moved the dry ingredients into the larger bowl with the butter and began to mix them together with a paddle, gently stirring them together until it was well blended. Masamune busied himself with a whisk while you gradually added the wet ingredients into the bowl. Once everything was mixed together you gradually added the warm milk, slowly though, so you didn’t accidentally cook the eggs in the batter.

Taking the rectangular metal bread pan from the basket of goods Masamune had bought at the market, you greased it with some butter and poured the mixed batter into it.

“Hey Masa, wanna taste?” he looked at you, lifting an eyebrow in confusion.

“I didn’t think we could eat it as a liquid?” both a comment and a questions all at once.

“Technically you’re not supposed to. Raw eggs can be bad for you. When I was younger, the best part of making a birthday cake with my dad was when I got to lick the batter off the spoon or whisk. It was like a preview of what was to come!” you held the spoon out to him. He had been unnaturally quiet throughout the entire process. Taking notes here and there, watching the process intently so he could recreate it on his own later.

He took the wooden spoon from you and cleaned the batter off the front side before handing it back to you.

“The cake’s for your birthday, it would be bad form if I took away the best part.” he smiled one of his brightest smiles as you made quick work of the rest of the batter.

“That was pretty good, just the right amount of sourness.”

“I agree.” You smiled at him as you made your way toward the oven. “I was a bit nervous about using yuzu instead of lemons.”

“Care if I take another taste?” His single blue eye twinkled with mischief as he slowly walked closer to you.

---

The hardest thing to find had been the butter, and even then it had been a ‘made to order’ sort of situation. There was only one trader that Nobunaga knew of that specialized in dairy products. Since they weren’t that popular here, I had used up every drop of the poor guy's cream supply. Then, I had to sit with this cream in a seal-able jar and shake the thing for what felt like a lifetime, switching with Nobunaga every so often, until the contents felt more solid than liquid. As if the shaking wasn’t enough, we still had to pour out all of the contents through a ‘colander’ (is what you had called it)...to make sure we only got the butter.

Despite all of that, every bit of today’s shopping trip had been worth it when I saw you smile. Happily mixing the ingredients together while you hummed a simple unfamiliar tune. It was captivating and I found myself wishing you would come cook with me more often.

My daydream was interrupted when the wooden spoon coated in cake batter was held out under my nose. “Hey Masa, wanna taste?” Interesting, I was certain this dessert had to be cooked before we could eat it.

“I didn’t think we could eat it as a liquid?” I questioned, growing more curious about it with every passing minute.

Taking time to describe the dangers of eating raw eggs before they divulged a childhood memory of baking cakes with their father as I took the spoon. I could imagine them, much younger than they are now, impatiently bouncing around the kitchen waiting for a taste of the batter. I sat and listened intently as I licked clean one side of the wooden spoon I was given. I can’t very well sit here and listen to them tell me this was ‘their favorite part’ and not leave some for them on their birthday.

The sharp acidic flavor of the yuzu stuck out but wasn’t overwhelming, it settled into the sweetness of the sugar and was cut rather well in all of the butter. I complimented the recipe before they walked over and placed the pan in the oven.

As they turned to look at me I noticed the tiniest bit of batter had made a home for itself on their cheek. “Care if I take another taste?” The looked over their shoulder at me confused. Trying to figure out where I could be going with this. Stepping forward I took them into my arms and licked the drop of their face. Their eyes went wide before they smiled leaning up on the balls of their feet to give me a kiss.

“Sorry, I couldn’t let you take the last of it for yourself. Hope you didn’t mind sharing”

“Not if that’s how we’re gonna share Lass.”

---

It was the hardest lemon pound cake you had ever worked for, and it technically wasn’t even a true lemon cake. Though it’s not like they had lemons in the Sengoku, Yuzu was close enough, so you know...when in Rome I guess. Between constantly stroking the fire to keep the heat even and vigorously mixing the leftover cream with the cooked down sugar to get an even whipped icing you were just beat.

You couldn’t remember the last time you had baked this hard, and you would forever be grateful to every single cook and confectioner of this time period, along with all of the cushy modern assistance you had been granted up until today.

The entire kitchen was perfumed with the scent of the Yuzu cake about twenty minutes into the baking process but had clearly wafted throughout Masamune’s manor as the day went on. Every so often a different retainer of Masa’s would swing by, drawn in by the scent of the cake. Being around it all afternoon, you had grown accustomed to the pleasant aroma but the moment it came off the fire and was sitting right in front of you, your stomach made a fool of you, growling audibly through the kitchen.

Masamune howled next to you before his own stomach talked back, leaving the two of you clinging to one another as you doubled over in laughter.

---

It had taken a great deal of patience but somehow you had made a birthday cake. You sat at one large table in the main hall with everyone passing out slices, happy to share with your friends. Everyone’s faces lit up as they dug in, enjoying the new texture of the foreign dessert.

“This is great lass, you gonna make one every year?” you favorite one-eyed stud asked. Before you could respond Nobunaga jumped in to answer for you.

“Of course they will...I’d also like to see it at each of our birthdays as well. Provided we can get the ingredients?” he looked over at you, daring you to argue. You let out a breath and smiled up at everyone.

“Sounds good to me. But Masamune has to help” you wiggled your eyebrows at him and he pounced, collecting you in his arms, leaning in to plant a kiss on your cheek.

“Of course I’ll help Kitten, you can’t be the only one to have all the fun!”

“Oh take it somewhere else before I choke on my cake.” Ieyasu grumbled as Mitsunari cooed beside him.

“Fine by me.” and he whisked you off your feet, cradling you in his arms, as he raced back to his manor. “Let’s go see if you’re as sweet as that cake.”

#ikesen #ikémen sengoku #ikemen sengoku #ikésen #ikesen masamune #ikesen masamune x reader #ikesen one shot #fan fic #Admin T's Birthday Extravaganza #vanilla really evaded me in this one #it was hard #cybirds characters

[shytiff]

June Small Wins

1 - ecmocard meeting with ppl from aussie to learn to sort out data. Felt better after the meeting cause i didnt feel like doing anything before. Got two season deli box cake from dapur cokelat for nessa. Videocalled w her and ren.

2 - dr eva chatted and gave things to do. I also need to make intern log for dr retha. I just cant bring myself to start. Finally mustered the courage. Im not the type of person for wfh. At least in this house. Finished reading love or hate. I rly felt like shit at night.

3 - started reading positively yours. Had no will to do anything

4 - some more sending spss work for dr eva. weekdays with no “outside work” rly render me useless in functioning. a vegetable

5 - iluni webinar. Lost my attention during electrolyte and fluid stuff. tried to cook ribeye steak lmao (meat from @/fridaymeatshop). Its too chewy and leathery. But its not too welldone. And at least it tastes good. Went to depok by krl. its quite quick since krl arrived just after im at poris and duri. went ahead of silvi devi. satpam on the lobby wont open the access hhhh (i dont have one. i dunno why. mom said she cant find it although we supposedly have 2). but my mood improved once im upstairs. we prepped a bit of deco. conversed in the dark so not to make racheel suspicious. surprisee. had truffle belly chicken cheese for dinner. the cheese was not to cheesy, its more of a gentle taste. mushroom tastes better. we watched sweet and sour from my mobile data. surprisingly, its not that much of data. slept at like 12-1ish

6 - the electric token went out in the morning. we went for a walk in ui. the PLK man across of st ui forbade us from going in. ugh. but it was rly empty. so we went from barel. its empty on the library. there was a dog that walked along with us. talked a bit in front of the lake. went back. i got 2 moon chicken (the basic flavor and not the wings) and spicy jumeokbap. the jumeokbap was nothing like what i had in korea. like the seaweed’s taste doesnt come out that much, and its not that flavorful/savory. the one in korea its good even by itself. went back to jkt nebeng reza silvi with devi. originally planned to go to flavola, but my head kinda hurts, so i finished my moon chicken at the mushola and asked juan to pick me up. still feel healthy and normal after going and staying out, so i started reading a book abt handwriting analysis lmaoo. fell asleep. tried several attempts to figure out my bpjs number and turns out the best there is to respond is BPJS’ twitter. the problem was solved under 5 mins. 

7 - woke up, fell asleep again. Adita told me that i might be interviewed today for the ipd intern but theres no info. Did the registration stuff for my bpjs. Registered for npwp. Watched bts x na pd

8 - off to RSF. its audit day today. hiks to phonecall follow up work. i did not do anything inaco related, i just sat there and did dr dafsah’s excel. dr vera bought me pecel ayam hehe yay. went to como park to meet up with indah regen. tried ricotta pizza from pizza place (33k). the cheese is cheese but not that typical cheesy (?) coupled with mushroom. i had to add sauce to withstand the last bites (still kinda full). tried other’s as well, pesto and mushroom. pesto had the most taste. while waiting for doggo to arrive, we bought gelato (S: 35k). apparently their special flavor was ricotta lmao. tried green tea (bitter, which i like) and peanut butter + caramel, which makes you feel thirsty. watched the doggos from the sidelines. after maghrib we went to 1/15. ordered ice mocha (50k). the chocolate taste stood out more. not gonna order again lol. the staff initially recommended pandan flavor. took grab to gbk station to go home.

9 - rsf. second audit day. i hate it here lmao. im not even paid for my time here. excused myself to eat. turns out mbak Ai bought hokben. i almost forgot thanking her since i felt hungry with a bit of headache. talked a bit with dr retha regarding changes of assistant (since internship is soon). went back and immediately laid down in bed. mom bought pizza so thats what i ate for dinner. fell asleep (i can feel it. my face will get consequences)

10 - cant bring myself to do anything. i reread painter of the night lmao. seungho is a prick. inhun is also a prick (a greedy one). ate arirang bone marrow. put the egg-seasoning mixture to the pan since im not confident enough to just pour boiling water into the bowl. felt surprisingly full. went to sbux. green tea latte as usual. but turns out tumblr 50% promo only applies to sbux member. so i had to pay 40k for my green tea latte. at least i got to feel good from outside vibes. did some follow up for INACO patients. 

11 - went to rm rsf. Took lots of photos of RM. I was given rujak by the rm staff lmaoo so cute. Didnt do any entry afterwards lmao i just laid down

12 - breakfast is paldo jjajangmen and egg. It tasted like soy. Its good but not in a micin way. Its quite fulfilling. Had some of the beef slices by putting it in a buttered pan (is it pan fried? Grilled? Idk). Had banana and brownies together (makes it rly good). Did a bit of clires work. I drank sbux's caramel macchiato but yall my stomach cant handle it lmao. It hurts so much that i even got a headache. So i just laid down in bed

13 - had arirang again loll. Inserted the egg to the pan still, but quicker this time. Its too salty today. Maybe its not enough water. I was eating it while googling how to remove excess sodium. Ate the rest of beef slices (shared with bros ofc) and mixed some with moms fried rice. Ate banana brownies again. Felt soooo full. Did some clires work accompanied by sbux matcha

14 - i felt like shit this morning. Watched leahs vid. Listened to her podcast while having bfast. I walked from moms car to bougenville while still feeling like shit. It slowly gets better afterwards, thankfully. Did some clires and follow up. Went to gandy steak in dr retha's car (which had anesthesiology textbook inside). Tried aus sirloin steak. The bread tasted ok. The garlic bread also ok. The mashed potato was so so (the one in depok was more creamy and smooth). The steak was good, especially the fat part, the sauce so so. Honestly that depok steak had more value for money compared to this, i think. Nebeng dr rara and husband to busway station. Arrived in ar and i immediately showered, such wow 👏👏

15 - today is no rsf day aka self made wfh day. Moms getting vaccinated today. I just lazed. And read kanej fics

16 - off to rsf. Took care of rm stuff. Tried social affair's croffle since i was so curious (60k [10k tip]). The nutella and cinnamon sugar one. Its crunchy and a bit crumbly inside, but not as fragile as croissant. Its quite fulfilling too. But its basically flour batter variations. (thats what mom would say). randomly chatted racheel and we ended up taking a walk and a bit of jog citra 6 (with my sneakon regular shoes). My left tendon was screaming lol. Picked up by juan who surprisingly effortlessly found the address at night.

17 - mbak aan chatted me today to go to rscm. Met prof murdani at pesc and he gave me ppt assigment for 13:30 THAT DAY. Finished it unsatisfyingly (i wish i couldve done more). Lunch was free bebek bkb yay thankyou Prof c: (he even asked what did i ate) took care of legalisir stuff. Went home by tj. Drank matcha w vsoy and i somehow was not sleepy after maghrib. I also changed my desj layout. Maybe it kinda works to separate my spaces

18 - arrived at rscm at 8-ish. sent updated thibbun nabawi ppt. literature search. and then somehow its 14:30. went to SCI w ara wani rasyid. tried bandeng nyonya, oyster, salmon, cumi lada garam (its crazy good among all the good tasting food wtff), shrimp and pocai telor (veggie stuff). dessert was thailand cassava. spent about 190k. went back by TJ. had wudu at pulomas and prayed ashar on the bus lol. i passed out after playing w my phone lmaoo  

19 - spent almost the whole day just sleeping and eating. finally showered in the afternoon. had matcha vsoy latte after maghrib and with enough day sleeping, i did presentation outline. at like 1/2 am i initially planned to sleep but my eyes still have plenty of watts. so i read hold me tight. slept at like 4/5 am

20 - woke up at 9. off to om dokter’s house to ask for healthy letter. we talked almost the entire time im there lol. before u know it mom and dad’s done talking with grandma. om dokter shared some of his experiences in the past. and he said something about making your choice and living with it, and it will all have a meaning even if you might initially agonize about it. girl i was holding back tears. here he was talking about choices, something i never rly talk about at my house. im getting teary just typing this. he talked about it in a way that sounds simple, even though i agonized abt internship choices and sometimes avoid thinking about it. it rly rly was a new experience. i dont rly talk about “choices” with my parents. so hearing how to go through options in life from a person i can relate to regarding this med stuff is. i feel like i would have loved it if i can hear his wisdom earlier. i dont talk with him much if my parents are around bcs they will just meddle and say stuff that wreck my peace. they dont rly know what im going through but can be very opinionated. this peaceful one on one talk rly made me feel relieved and reassured. and i was today years old when i found out he initially wanted to be a psychiatrist. he would have been a great psychiatrist. i feel like we have some understanding thats left unsaid. like he knows how my parents are like. he would probably understand why i dont talk with him much at AR. after what feels super quick, we went back to AR. registered for STR. searched some literature for the topics that Prof is the moderator of. powered by matcha energy

21 - rscm as usual. the Prof did not come. lunch was bread i brought from home. waited for mom to pick me up at kfc so i bought pukis kfc. its like properly made pukis and not the street seller made ones. the chocolate one was good since the toppings generous. felt a bit feverish? like my body felt warm. fell asleep and then suddenly its 6 am in the morning. 

22 - Prof still did not came. had amart’s ayam penyet jamur for lunch. turns out juan bought ayam geprek gendut for dinner. night time is diarrhea time lmaooooo. did not feel sleepy at AR but i skipped shower again lmao,,,,,,,, and then suddenly its morning again

23 - jajan from sisterfield today. tried their carrot cake and kopi susu gula aren. the carrot cake has that carrot texture. its different. the icing was fresh cream cheese that made the cake taste good. the coffee made my stomach ache a bit. it has that subtle chocolatey taste. fell asleep again. third time’s the charm (of 1x/day face wash). woke up at 3 am planning to sleep but i ended up washing my face. turns out atikah was still awake due to AZ fever.

24 - this is the bestest sleep i had in this week (?) had a dream about going to bandung and the car falling to water. forgot my headset today. can finally meet prof Mur. talked abt inaco stuff w agassi. reread komugi meruem lmaoo. felll asleep. somehow had the misfortune of hearing dad’s hurtful words to mom. i want to fall asleep again but its difficuly. i went through stages of pent up anger, some sort of selfishness (i will go out from jakarta for internship), amazement to mom, and... (continue 2moro)

25 - lunch was dori rice from kanprim thanks to rasyid’s jastip. watched bts’ butter norebang lolll :(((. arrived at AR the fastest ive been. mom came to me right before maghrib and  summed some stuff dad said yesterday. she handled it in a trivial way. like she was unaffected. and that somehow helped me too. stuck around in the dining room for a while after maghrib. talked about internship w mom. i left some chance for dad to yap yap abt whatever related to internship (thankfully songs were full volume through my wireless headset) while im inhaling through my matcha latte. i wont write what he said bcs its lowkey super embarrassing. thank the gods for wireless speakers. 

26 - did not do anything productive today. Had arirang salted egg for bfast (wont repurchase). Had the meat cubes i bought online and its rly good. Ran with racil at citra 6. The tendon in my left feet hurt lol. Gmeet with ara et al to discuss internship review

27 - lazed. Wanted to start my day early but couldnt bring myself to. Binge watched twoset videos. Did clires stuff. 1 more RM to wait from IRMIK. No gastro intern work this weekend aaaa im starting to panic.

28 - juan came along otw to rscm. Talked about iship otw. brought tons of stuff to eat, including matcha latte, but i was unable to finish it lol. Discussed research budgeting w Prof. Didnt do anything in home. Starting to panic with my ppt progress.

29 - discussed budgeting revision. Prof thought abt little details i didnt even consider. Didnt do anything while at ar anjengggg

30 - prof did not come to dept today. Listemed to agassi rambling abt intern stuff. Immediately opened my laptop in ar. Watched two set. Played marapets lmaooo i finally managed to gather 3 au for shop pricer. But still didnot wash my face 👁️👄🤦‍♀️ maybe bcs i hate doing what people tells me to do (re: shower due to covid scare). Had a nightmare abt being in a car ride alone w dad and it was rly rly awkward

[teachingoutsidethebinary]

Mother’s Day

Summary: Bucky’s daughter enlists his help to create the best Mother’s Day present ever.

Characters: Bucky Barnes, OFC Becca Barnes, reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 1127

Masterlist

Bucky could feel someone staring at him as he slept. He slowly opened his eyes to find his daughter kneeling at the side of the bed. He groaned and looked at the clock.

“It’s only 6am,” Bucky mumbled sleepily. “Go back to bed.”

“Daddy, I have a mission!” Becca whispered urgently.

“A mission?” Bucky asked, sleep still taking over his senses.

Becca nodded her head vigorously. “It’s for Mommy’s Day! Can you help me?”

Bucky was suddenly wide awake at her words. All week, whenever he asked if she needed help with her present, she insisted everything was fine. At four years old, Becca was already quite independent, and he knew she would ask for his help when she needed it.

Apparently, she needed his help at 6am on a Sunday.

“Okay, I’m up,” Bucky said quietly. He carefully pulled back the covers and gently got out of bed.

Becca grabbed his metal hand with hers and led him out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. She had set up mixing bowls, pans, and various grocery items on the kitchen island. A large, well-loved cookbook sat open next to the pile, and a step stool stood in front of the stove.

“I need help reading,” Becca said, pulling him over to the cookbook. “There are some words I don’t know.” She dragged the step stool over to the island, climbed on top, and looked at Bucky expectantly.

“Okay, sweetie, what can I do?” he asked, staring at his daughter adoringly.

“Please read me the directions for pancakes,” she replied, matter-of-factly.

Bucky cleared his throat dramatically and began to read. As he listed the ingredients, Becca would pour them into the mixing bowl. She dutifully measured each cup of flour, each teaspoon of vanilla, and more until everything was combined. When it came time to crack the eggs, she insisted on doing it herself.

“Oops,” Becca said as the shell cracked and spilled into the bowl in tiny pieces. Her little chin wobbled as she stared at the mess. “Is it ruined, Daddy?”

“No, baby, we can get those out,” Bucky assured her. He took a spoon out of the drawer and showed her how to scoop out the pieces of shell. Her little tongue poking out of her lip in determination, she managed to get most of the pieces out.

“See, all better,” Bucky said, kissing her cheek. Becca giggled and kissed him back.

“Now we stir,” Becca announced, grabbing the wooden spoon.

“Now we stir,” Bucky confirmed.

He stood behind the stool and reached around Becca to hold the bowl still as she swirled the spoon and hummed a little nonsensical tune. She bobbed her head and started singing softly.

“I love Mommy, so I’m makin’ pancakes. Mommy likes pancakes, just like me! I love Mommy, Daddy’s gonna help me. Pancakes, pancakes, for us three!”

If Bucky had the ability to freeze time and stay in this moment forever, he would. He choked back tears of joy as he watched his beautiful little girl. She had the biggest heart, and he hoped that would never change.

“Stove, daddy!” Becca said, hopping off the stool. Bucky brought the bowl over to the stove as Becca lifted her stool and walked awkwardly over to him.

“Not too close, Becca,” Bucky warned, as he turned on the stove. He put some butter in the pan and placed it on top of one of the burners. “Maybe I should do this part.”

“But it’s my present!” Becca protested. “I have to do it.”

“Okay, let’s make a deal,” Bucky compromised. “You can pour the batter in, but I flip it. Okay?”

Bucky placed her little hand under her chin and considered his offer. “You have a deal,” she finally replied, holding out her hand. She and Bucky shook on it.

Becca scooped each load of batter out meticulously, trying to make sure she got even scoops. She watched in awe as small bubbles appeared, and Bucky waited each time for her signal to flip. She was so enamored by watching the first two pancakes that they may have been slightly crispier than the others. Finally, once all the pancakes were made, Bucky carried the finished plate back over to the island.

“Okay, Daddy, you go back to bed,” Becca said, as she pulled out the serving tray from the low cabinet.

Bucky eyed her warily. “Why don’t I stay and help?” he asked, praying she would say yes.

“It’s a surprise! Mommy won’t be surprised if you’re with me,” Becca replied.

“Honey, that tray is almost as tall as you-” he stopped as Becca gave him an all-too-familiar glare. She had inherited more than your intelligence and patience. “Okay, okay,” he said, holding up his hands in defeat. “But don’t put too much on the tray or it’ll spill.”

“Okay. Now go!” his daughter commanded.

Bucky obliged and quietly tip toed back into bed. As he climbed back under covers, you sighed contentedly. He froze, and you stayed asleep. Breathing a sigh of relief, he laid back down and prayed to god that Becca didn't drop the tray. He had left the door almost halfway open so she didn't need to try and maneuver opening the door knob while carrying the obnoxious serving tray.

He used his super soldier hearing to listen carefully for his daughter’s carefully footsteps. He quickly hid under the covers and pretended to sleep as Becca walked in the room.

“Happy Mommy’s Day, Mommy!” she yelled, causing both of you to jolt up in bed.

You rubbed your eyes and gasped when you saw the plate. Becca had piled four pancakes on a plate and drenched it in syrup. A glass of orange juice stood behind a fork and knife. Apparently, Becca had overfilled it because some of the orange juice swam on the tray.

“Is this for me?” you asked, your eyes wide with surprise. You carefully took the tray out of her hands and rested it on your lap.

“Yup! I made it all by myself!” Becca said proudly.

“You did, did you?” you asked, looking to Bucky knowingly.

He merely winked and kissed your forehead.

Becca ran over to Bucky’s side of the bed so he could lift her up with you. She snuggled against his chest as she watched you eat.

“Do you like it, Mommy?” Becca asked hopefully.

“This is by far the BEST breakfast I’ve ever eaten,” you hummed. You kissed her cheek with sticky lips and laughed as she tried to wipe the syrup off her face. “Thank you so much Becca.”

“Love you, Mommy,” Becca said.

“I love you too, honey,” she replied.

Bucky leaned over and kissed you chastely on the lips.

“Happy Mother’s Day, doll.”

TAGS: @buckyappreciationsociety

#james bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes has a daughter #mother's day #breakfast in bed #fluff #fluffy bucky #so much fluff #Bucky Barnes is a cinnamon roll

[thomasedward236-blog]

Important tips about keto diet for beginners

If you are a sentient being living in the year 2019, you’ve heard about the keto diet. More than that, there’s a 98 percent chance* that you know someone—your best friend, mother, former high school classmate who is involved in a pyramid scheme—who has embraced this low-carb/high-fat diet. (*Based on my very unscientific, but probably accurate, real-life observations.)

Only unlike that MLM company Becky from freshman year bio keeps spamming you about on Facebook, the keto diet could actually be a positive thing for you. A growing body of research has shown that our bodies need fat to thrive, which explains why the ketogenic diet—which emphasizes fats and strictly reduces carb intake—is having a serious moment. (And nearly every celeb, from Halle Berry to Vinny from Jersey Shore, is on board.)

While a diet filled with avocados, EVOO, and butter may sound like a true gift, there are a few super-important rules—and icky side-effects—that you need to know about. (Hello, “keto flu”!) keto budget meal plan http://www.ketogasmic.com/keto-budget-meal-plan-a-handy-guide-for-beginners

Scroll down for the ketogenic diet for beginners, explained.

Learn the ratios

Let’s start with the basics: your macros. “The most important thing to know before embarking on the ketogenic diet is that you need to keep your carb intake under 30 grams total per day,” says Keto Comfort Foods author Maria Emmerich.

This is because the absence of carbohydrates forces your body into—and keeps it in—ketosis, the metabolic state key to the ketogenic diet. When your body is in ketosis, it switches from using carbs as its primary source of energy and instead uses ketones (fats) as its energy source. “This enables you to tap into greater energy reserves, improves your moods, and allows you to burn excess body fat,” Emmerich says.

Next, you’ll want to eat about 0.8 times your lean mass in protein every day. “A woman who weighs 150 pounds and has 30 percent body fat has about 105 pounds of lean mass, so she would shoot for 84 grams of protein each day,” says Emmerich. Fat should clock in somewhere around 90 to 100 grams per day. Luckily, you can easily reach these macros with some insanely delish recipes, like these cinnamon maca bites, avocado fries, or Emmerich’s basil deviled eggs—scroll all the way down for the how-to. Keto Egg Recipes For Breakfast http://www.ketogasmic.com/top-10-keto-egg-recipes-for-breakfast

Expect some side effects

The main side effect of keto is that you’re required to post on Instagram stories about how delicious your cauliflower pizza crust is, and how you totally don’t miss carbs because it’s just as good as real pizza crust (even though everyone knows that’s false). I know because it happened to me.

But real talk, there’s also this thing called the “keto flu” which is pretty much exactly what it sounds like. “During the first one to two weeks of the keto diet, it’s common to experience a number of symptoms as the body adjusts to using fat for energy instead of glucose,” says Josh Axe, D.N.M., C.N.S., D.C., author of the upcoming book Keto Diet. The main side effects, Dr. Axe says, are fatigue, brain fog, headaches, trouble sleeping, constipation and indigestion, trouble sleeping, less motivation to exercise, irritability, and increased urination and moodiness. Cool. (Again, you will probably feel inclined to post about all of this dramatically on Instagram stories. This is all very normal.) While you’re at it, maybe stay off your dating apps for a while—or, at least, don’t schedule any dates during this two week period. There’s this fun thing called “keto breath,” where your breath stinks worse than old garlic during the transition into ketosis. This admittedly does not lend itself well to romance (not that I’m speaking from personal experience or anything).

Headaches are also really common, but can be prevented by upping your water intake and adding electrolytes into your diet. “[The headaches] are primarily due to dehydration, because your body retains water when you’re on a high-carbohydrate diet,” explains Emmerich. “Going into ketosis will release much of this water along with electrolytes.” Make sure to sip on tons of H20 along with coconut water (which naturally has electrolytes), and you should be able to manage the first few weeks without relying on a steady dose of aspirin.

Stock your pantry with the keto staples

“Your pantry won’t look a whole lot different—just remove all the carb filled junk,” Emmerich says. Here are some low-carb basics she says your new-and-improved keto kitchen will need:

• Coconut oil and/or MCT oil • Ghee • Grass-fed butter • Olive oil • Grass-fed beef • Line-caught fish • Organic chicken • Eggs • Non-starchy vegetables like spinach and Brussels sprouts • Almond flour (Emmerich says this is a great tool for putting a keto-friendly spin on your favorite desserts) • You may notice there’s one major ingredient missing: sugar, which pretty much instantly kicks you out of ketosis.

While a few natural sweeteners are fair game on the diet, including stevia, xylitol, and monk fruit, Emmerich recommends avoiding them, too, while you adjust to this new way of eating. “Abstain from all sweet flavors for a month; this will shift the palate away from sweet tastes,” suggest Emmerich. “At the end of the month, you’ll find that sweet flavors won’t cause so many cravings, even when using healthy natural sweeteners in moderation.”

Don’t make these common mistakes

Dr. Axe says that there are three major mistakes people make when they embark on a keto diet that could be affecting their experience on the eating plan (and their results). First up: not eating enough non-starchy veggies. “We need vegetables in our diet to obtain fiber, vitamins, and electrolytes that help prevent side effects,” he explains. “Non-starchy veggies like leafy greens and cruciferous vegetables should be eaten throughout the day.”

Dehydration is another thing to watch out for. “Urination is increased on the keto diet, and electrolytes are lost at an increased rate,” Dr. Axe says. He says it’s important to drink lots of water, and consuming salt (an electrolyte!) by adding sea salt to your food and drinking bone broth.

Last, he says people often make the mistake of using a high-fat diet as an excuse to eat tons of processed food (there’s a reason why keto is known as the butter-and-bacon diet.) “A clean approach means focusing on whole, unprocessed foods (like olive oil, grass-fed butter, avocado, cage-free eggs, fish etc.), limiting processed meats and refined vegetable oils, and incorporating vegetables into the diet too,” Dr. Axe says. That way you’ll enjoy the results of ketosis without missing out on major nutritional components that your body needs.

Prepare to make long-term changes

Think the keto diet is a “one-and-done” kind of deal? Not necessarily! You may just be testing the waters or taking on a 30-day challenge, but know that many people wind up making the keto diet a permanent lifestyle change.

“Most of my clients are amazed at how good they feel after starting this diet,” says Emmerich, adding that many experience healthy weight loss. “Once people realize how great they feel on a keto diet, they’ll likely try to stay keto for life.” Keto Egg Recipes http://www.ketogasmic.com/top-10-keto-egg-recipes-for-breakfast

However, a lifetime of keto eating is not recommended for everyone, so it’s best to listen to your body and talk to your doc. “Typically it’s recommended that a traditional keto diet be followed for about two to six months, or perhaps for about a year if someone has a lot of weight to lose and is responding well,” Dr. Axe says. “In some cases, if a patient with a health condition (such as diabetes or epilepsy for example) is working with a doctor, they might follow the diet for longer, such as one to two years.” He adds that most people will see results like weight loss, improved mood, and better mental clarity in six months or less. After that, people may choose to carb-cycle moving forward—”meaning they increase carb intake about 1-2 days per week to restore their glycogen stores,” he explains.

Ready to try it? Check out one of Emmerich’s go-to keto recipes, below. Basil deviled egg recipe

Serves 6

Ingredients

12 large eggs 1/2 cup basil mayonnaise (see below) 1 tsp coconut vinegar or apple cider vinegar 1/2 tsp fine sea salt 6 cups mixed greens, for serving 12 cherry tomatoes, halved, for garnish Fresh basil leaves, for garnish 3/4 cup easy basil hollandaise (see below)

Basil mayonnaise

1 cup coarsely chopped fresh basil leaves 3/4 cup mayonnaise 1 clove garlic, crushed to a paste 1/4 tsp fine sea salt Easy basil hollandaise 1 cup loosely packed fresh basil leaves 1 cup bacon fat, beef tallow, or leaf lard 4 large egg yolks 1/2 cup lemon juice 1/2 tsp fine sea salt 1/4 tsp fresh ground black pepper

1. Make the basil mayonnaise: Place the basil in a food processor or blender and puree until smooth. Add the mayo, garlic, and salt and pulse until well combined. Place in a jar, cover, and store in the fridge for up to one week.

2. Hard-boil the eggs: Place the eggs in a large saucepan and cover with cold water. Bring the water to a boil, then immediately cover the pan and remove it from the heat. Allow the eggs to cook in the hot water for 11 minutes.

3. After 11 minutes, drain the hot water and rinse the eggs with very cold water for a minute or two to stop the cooking process. Peel the boiled eggs and cut them in half lengthwise. Remove the yolks and place them in a bowl (or a food processor). Mash or blend the egg yolks with a fork (or a food processor) until they are the texture of very fine crumbles.

4. Add the basil mayonnaise, vinegar, and salt to the egg yolks and stir to evenly combine. Fill the egg white halves with the yolk mixture.

5. Divide the mixed greens among 12 plates and place 2 deviled eggs on each plate. Garnish with cherry tomato halves and basil leaves and drizzle each deviled egg with 1½ teaspoons of basil hollandaise, if desired.

6. Keep leftover deviled eggs in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 3 days.

Basil hollandaise

1. heat the fat in a small saucepan over high heat (or in the microwave) until very hot and melted. Set aside.

2. Combine the basil, egg yolks, and lemon juice in a blender and puree until very smooth. With the blender running on low speed, drizzle in the hot melted fat until a thick, creamy mixture forms. Add the salt and pepper and pulse to combine; adjust the seasoning to taste.

3. Use immediately or keep warm for up to 1 hour in a heat-safe bowl set over warm water. Store in a covered jar in the fridge for up to 5 days. Reheat the sauce in a double boiler or a heat-safe bowl set over a pot of simmering water, whisking often, until the sauce is warm and thick.

[foxxygold-blog]

Kyle: B-Day

I don’t know if you can tell but I just kept losing focus and motivation near the end and I’m like three days late. Shoot me.

Warning: Strong Language

                                 ____________________________

 You looked down at the cake before you with a nervous sweat running down your back. Was it possible the monstrosity in front of you could even be called a cake? You weren’t the only one scared of the sugary monster on the counter in front of you. Standing to your left wearing a very pink and flower apron was Stan marsh, also known as Kyle’s super best friend, and to your right was Butters who had come to help the two of you bake. However, you had no skills in the kitchen; Stan wanted to be captain of this horrendous group project so he was always battling with Butters who actually knew how to bake anything from a singular cupcake to (probably) a seven layer cake. You stood there, watching the cake slowly fall to the side and onto the counter, leftover egg splattered across the countertop dripping over the edge with shell mixed in with it.

Today was Kyle’s birthday, and you had gotten Stan to join you in on the idea of making him a homemade cake. However, due to your sour thumb in baking the two of you had enlisted the help of Butters. Now, with the kitchen, practically a mess, the superb party for the ginger was about to go on everyone was in panic mode. You still wanted to make something homemade for Kyle, you loved him after all. Looking at the toxic goop beginning to bubble and form on your counter, you felt your heart sink into your stomach as you crouched down and fought back tears.

“O-Oh hamburgers, are you okay?! We can fix this, really we can—“

“No, we can’t Butters! The party starts soon and we don’t have enough of ANYTHING to give Kyle… I just wanted to give him something hand baked made with the love of my heart because that’s, ya know, what they do in the cheesy animes and movies but this,” you pointed to the leaning tower of sweets in your kitchen, “this is just a fucking abomination!”

You continued to crouch in the middle of the kitchen floor, crying softly to yourself at the fact you were unable to do something as sweet and as simple as making the love of your life a cake. As you sat there crying, Stan felt a bit guilty for all the fighting and arguing he had done with Butters. If he had just let him lead like originally planned maybe this wouldn’t have turned out as bad as it did.  Stan walked over to the counter, staring down at their monster baby before carefully picking it up from its pan and just dropping all of it into the trash can. Hearing the clattering, you looked up and witnessed your friend throwing out the failure of a cake before returning to you and crouching down.

“Listen, we have some batter left we can maybe salvage with the help of Butters, it’s not over yet. Besides, I want to make something for my SBF just as much as you want to make something for your crush,” Stan smiled. Butters seemed to look around at what was left, grabbing what he could and cleaning up some of the mess before looking back at the both of you.

“Well, if we start now we can have a small first batch out and iced when people get here. If we play it right we can bake until people are full, so it’s not completely ruined!” You couldn’t help but smile, using the sleeves of your shirt covered in flour and other cake ingredients to wipe off your tears before standing with a nod of your head in determination. You were going to give that Jew the best cupcake he would have in his whole life.

As time rolled by and you listened to Butters like he was your Lord and Savior, you and Stan both followed his instructions to the T, mixing things appropriately and even triple checking with him that you guys had measurements right and things filled correctly. You had decided to use your house for Kyle’s birthday since your parents were conveniently out of town for the day, so you guys could do almost anything while they weren’t here. As the doorbell went off, you carefully set the large mixing bowl down on the counter and wiped your hands hastily on your baby blue apron before leaving Butters and Stan to fan down the fresh cupcakes so they were cool enough to be iced. As you ran over to the front door and opened it, you were only greeted by Token and his gang. You gave a wipe of your brow in relief, scared it was going to be Kyle with the ass-hat and Kenny.

“Oh, sorry if I look like dog garbage, I’m uh. Still busy in the kitchen with stuff, however normal food is ready, the sweets aren’t done yet. Help yourself to the TV, new games I bought for us, and any music from the stereo. If you go upstairs, stay out of my top dresser drawers and completely out of my mother’s room. Thanks,” you didn’t give the boys a chance to say anything back before you ran off back to the kitchen.

You could cry in joy at the sight before. Though the boys certainly weren’t the artistic kind, the cupcakes were cool enough now and being iced. You were giddy, excited to feed the sweets to everyone, considering how hard you and the three had worked on these fuckers.  You ushered Stan to go get changed and cleaned, telling him you would finish and he could hang out with Kyle when he got here. As he put the piping bag down, you took it up and began decorating in his place, the living room easily echoing into the silent kitchen as Token and Clyde began playing what you could only assume was the sound of Smash Bros on your TV. You stood there, decorating each mini-cake with a little determined pout on your face til you heard Butters stifling his laughter while looking at you. You finished up the current cupcake and relaxed your grip as you turned to him.

“W-What the hell is so funny Butters?!”

“Well it’s just, you’ve never been the super girly girl type, but for Kyle, you’re wearing one of your mother's frilly aprons, covered in flour from head to toe from trying to bake him a cake. It’s just really funny because it’s very unlike you.”

“Well, I just. I really like the guy, okay? He’s sweet but also a smart ass, and I think he looks cutest when angry and fighting with Cartman. Look, I’m, my heart is gay, okay? Like it’s weird, ignore me, can we finish?” You began to ramble without meaning too, trying to avoid eye contact with him and not wanting to talk about your feelings.

Butters simply smiled and went back to help you bake and decorate cupcakes. You decided to take it upon yourself and make a very pretty one just for Kyle. There weren’t any special colors, but you decided to simply try our very hardest on this particular cupcake. It felt like you were defusing a time bomb as you slowly covered it in beautiful swirls and curls. The doorbell continuously went off as you were in the kitchen, and each time you paused to listen in on everyone, hoping to catch names in the wind. Luckily, none of the outbursts were loud ‘happy birthdays’ which meant Kyle still wasn’t here yet. As you wrapped up the little Cupcake you personally decorated for the ginger, you set it aside before turning to Butters as he finished up the last bitch just minutes before Kyle walked in.

“BIRTHDAY BOY IN THE HOUSE!” You froze in your spot as everyone began cheering and laughing. Oh god, Kyle was here, he was here and you looked like fucking shit. You had batter smeared all across your apron from the first monstrosity birthed from your oven as well as floor and icing caking, pun intended your hair and face. The last thing you had wanted to do was look like a fucking wreck in front of the one person you actually gave two shits about. Deciding to take a makeshift bath in the kitchen without getting completely undressed, you tossed the apron across the kitchen and told yourself you’d have to wash it later. Turning the sink on to MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE, you let the water becoming scalding hot before washing your hands and doing your best to get the crap out of your hair and off your face, though it was awesome because now you’d be smelling like the Pillsbury Doughboys asshole for the next few days. In the meantime, Stan was busy occupying his group of friends, doing his best to keep them from the kitchen.

“Stan why the fuck is your hands covered in girly Band-Aids,” Kenny muffled. Kyle grabbed his friend’s hands and raised them. Multiple Band-Aids with the little face of Hello Kitty was on them and cursed Butters for being a piece of shit sometimes.

“I was helping out in the kitchen with food, before you guys got here, (y/n) really wanted to make a cake for you Kyle, though in the end, it looked like a monster from a movie in the 1970s so they salvaged what they could with mine and Butters help,” of course he would never admit to playing around with a knife and then getting hurt from his stupid actions. At this information, Kyle seemed to brighten up just a bit, the sound of you making something just for him? He couldn’t wait now.

You managed to run into the living room, looking decent and greeted everyone with smiles and hugs. As you reached Stan and the group, you gave Kyle a tight hug from behind before popping up in front of him with a little jump and shouting ‘BOO’ and watched as he faked his fear. The two of you shared a little laugh as Cartman gagged in the background and rolled his eyes.

“Sorry it took me so long to get out here I was busy in the kitchen.”

“You’re fine, Stan was just telling me you were baking me a homemade dessert,” Kyle smirked. You felt nervous and your heart melt. You felt your face growing warm and panicked, was your face red? Could they all see that you were embarrassed? You gave a nervous laugh.

“Y-Yeah, I guess I should go get those for you then, shouldn’t I? Sorry, it’s not a cake and instead cupcakes, but I hope you enjoy them.” You ran off to grab the tray of multiple cupcakes, the more decorative one in the middle surrounded by nineteen candles. As you heard Stan call for everyone to gather around, you carefully lit each candle as fast as possible before picking up the tray and moving slowly as to not blow out the fire. When you began to peak around the corner, everyone began to sing quietly to Kyle, who had a big joyous smile on his face as you walked over. As you set down the tray, the little candles flickered from where they were resting, and you carefully sat down across from Kyle.

“Happy birthday Kyle, make a wish.”

#kyle week #kyleweek #kyle week 2k19 #day 1: happy b day! #readerinsert #kyle x reader

[tebbyclinic11]

A Super Bowl Masterpiece: Bo Ssam-Style Pulled Por...

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A Super Bowl Masterpiece: Bo Ssam-Style Pulled Por...

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On this week’s episode of the Bon Appétit Foodcast, food director Carla Lalli Music, editor in chief Adam Rapoport, and Adam’s friend Gabe Tesoriero (a music exec and excellent home cook who has somewhat inexplicably become a semi-regular on the show) talk about how to create the ultimate Super Bowl menu. They are loud and opinionated in a playoff-style game, pitting specific dishes against each other in the categories of appetizers, mains, drinks, and desserts until they arrive at one winner in each (well, except for appetizers, where there are two winners, because a Super Bowl party with one appetizer is a Super Bowl party nobody wants to attend).

There was queso versus pimiento cheese, chips and guacamole versus nachos, meatball subs versus cheesesteaks, cheap beer versus craft beer… The list goes on.

Photo by Alex Lau

Time to assemble.

One category, though, stumped them: bo ssam (a Korean dish of pork wrapped in lettuce leaves with rice, kimchi, and a variety of sauces) versus pulled pork sandwiches with slaw. After a bit of back-and-forth, the three decided to combine the two into one dish that can only be described as absurdly delicious. Bo ssam-style pulled pork sandwiches.

“I make bo ssam all the time as dinner party food and it always wows the guests,” says Gabe. “People that have never had it lose it, and people that have had it mark it in their calendar.” But bo ssam needs a full table. You have to assemble your wraps multiple times with all the accoutrements, passing kimchi and rice and lettuce around. It’s not as easy to eat on the couch, watching the Super Bowl, with a coffee table crammed with dips and chips and cans of beers. And so this bo ssam-style pulled pork sandwich was born, leaving all the other mains in the dust.

Here’s how to make it:

Start with your pork. The recipe we love comes from Momofuku, with a glazed, little-bit-sweet, little-bit-salty outer crust and falling-apart tender meat on the inside. The process takes a couple of days because you have to salt the meat and leave it in the fridge overnight, but the beauty of it is that if you think ahead, it requires very little else—just a quick rub down of salt and sugar, and then a bunch of hands-off, hanging out time in the oven (besides the very occasional basting of the juices that slowly but surely emerge from the meat). By the time your guests come over, you’ll have prepped all the other pieces of the sandwich and all that will be left to do is assemble.

Speaking of all those other pieces of the sandwich, here’s what else to make. First, a ginger scallion sauce, which in the case of this recipe is tossed with ramen noodles. Ignore the ramen noodle part and make it as a stand-alone condiment.

Next comes a cilantro mayo, which is mayo (we like Hellman’s), a bunch of chopped up cilantro, and lime juice. We like it heavy on the lime to balance out the fat, but taste as you go until it’s to your liking.

After that, there’s kimchi slaw. We combined napa cabbage, mild chili flakes, grated ginger, grated garlic, sesame oil, seasoned rice vinegar, and fish sauce. But you can also grab a jar of kimchi at the store (or here) and your sandwiches will be no worse off for it.

Speaking of the store, the rest of the ingredients are all items to purchase: bread and butter pickles, a few jalapeños that you’ll slice up for people who like extra heat, sprigs of cilantro to bring brightness, and hoisin sauce for that funky, sweet, umami element. Oh, and of course, Martin’s potato rolls to somehow contain the mess of glorious components going inside.

Now Super Bowl party on.

Listen to the full episode here, or wherever you get your podcasts:

For more Super Bowl recipes, head here:

37 Super Bowl Favorites That You Need at Your Party

Alex Lau

BA’s Best Buffalo Wings

Two key steps ensure extra-crisp wings: letting them sit at room temperature evens the cooking time, and the cornstarch dredge transforms into a crunchy shell when fried. If you like your wing sauce super spicy, increase the amount of cayenne in our best hot wings recipe. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Laura Murray

Bob Armstrong Chile con Queso

The signature dish at Matt’s El Rancho in Austin, Texas, named after former Texas land commissioner Bob Armstrong, who one day asked them to make him “something different.” What resulted was a now-legendary layered dip of taco meat, queso, guacamole, sour cream, and pico de gallo. Important: Don’t used aged or extra-sharp cheddar, which is drier and doesn’t melt smoothly.

Alex Lau

Party-Ready Italian Heros

Visit an Italian deli and splurge on the cold cuts, but hit the supermarket for everything else, including the not-too-crusty rolls that are usually loaded into bins in the bakery section.

Matt Duckor

Alex Lau

Laura Murray

Manicotti

There are two types of stuffed manicotti in the world. One is made with large tubular dried pasta, and the other uses a thin crepe (crespelle in Italian) instead. Both are filled before baking. This recipe is the second kind, and the delicate crepes deliver a lightness that you just don’t get from baked pasta. That said, it’s a process, so do what Brad does: “Double the recipe and freeze one of the trays. Trust me.” And here’s why he calls this manicotti the greatest recipe of all time!

Bobbi Lin

Beef Chili

It’s faster and easier to brown the meat in larger pieces first and chop them afterward. Using intact dried chiles instead of jarred powders contributes a more complex flavor and a saturated color. Adding lager imparts just the right amount of bitterness, rounding out the chiles. This is a part of our Super Bowl party menu—see the rest of the recipes here.

Alex Lau

Vincent Cross

Giant Chocolate Chip Skillet Cookie

The batter for this large-format dreamboat of a cookie (crunchy on the edges, chewy in the middle) is made in one bowl with no special equipment, and can be baked in either a cast-iron or large skillet.

Laura Murray

Juicy Lucy Sliders

We’re obsessed with Juicy Lucys, cheese-filled burgers that originated in Minnesota. Here’s our recipe for sliders—appetizers that you can make super-decadent by melting some butter in the skillet before toasting the potato rolls.

Alex Lau

BA’s Best Onion Rings

The secret to our best onion rings is a batter made with beer and club soda; make sure both are very cold before stirring into the batter. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Alex Lau

Easy Veggie Pizza

What better way to sneak a few more veggies into the day than on top of a super-quick pizza?

Alex Lau

Cheesesteaks

Look for short ribs with the most marbling possible for these cheesesteaks; if you really want to splash out, use boneless rib eye.

Laura Murray

Cheesy Monkey Bread

Start with cold dough—instead of warm or room-temperature—so that the cheese mixture doesn’t melt.

Alex Lau

Black-Bottom Brownies

For the neatest, cleanest edges, freeze the brownies for 15 minutes so they’re nice and firm before cutting, and dip your knife in hot water between each slice.

©Romulo Yanes

Bacon Deviled Eggs

Want to take your deviled eggs recipe to the next level? One word: bacon.

Cedric Angeles

BA Party Mix

More colorful than the bagged stuff (and you can make a triple batch and eat it forever).

Alex Lau

BA’s Best Guacamole

It takes a while for the avocado to absorb all the flavors you add to it. So if you ever find yourself wondering if your guac is spicy (or salty, or lime-y) enough, wait a few minutes before you add more so that you don’t accidentally overseason it. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Kenji Toma

Christina Holmes

Laura Murray

Laura Murray

Beer Cheese

To bring the beer to room temperature faster and make it flat, you can whisk it on the stovetop over low heat or heat in a microwave in short increments, stirring in between. Or, you know, just use the open bottle that you left sitting on the coffee table all night.

Alex Lau

BA’s Best Fried Chicken Sandwich

This sandwich is engineered for maximum impact. Each element is awesome, but it’s the way they come together that puts it over the top. Mmmmm, yeah. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Jarren Vink

Bobbi Lin

Classic Skillet Cornbread

Don’t expect something sweet and muffiny here. We follow the three tenets of traditional Southern cornbread: There’s no sugar added, there’s no flour (only course-ground cornmeal), and there’s no better way to bake it than in a cast-iron skillet. This rustic cornbread is sturdy and dry and meant to be dunked, like say in this beef chili. Serve it with this hot honey butter. See more Super Bowl recipes here.

Jarren Vink

Matt Duckor

Crispy Potato Skins

Crispy, cheesy, bacon-y—they’re an irresistible Super Bowl snack. So irresistible, in fact, that you may want to make a double batch of this potato skins recipe.

Alex Lau

BA’s Best Peanut Butter Cookies

What makes this peanut butter cookie recipe The Best? Well, there’s a few reasons actually. We call for natural peanut butter so that you can dial the sugar and salt amounts exactly. Instead of just adding roasted peanuts from the can, we roast them a second time for even more peanutty flavor. And the pan of water in the oven creates a burst of steam that gives the finished cookies the perfect crunchy-chewy texture. Now you know! This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Alex Lau

Sausage Meatball Sandwiches

We like the combo of spicy and sweet Italian sausage, but use any uncooked sausage you like—merguez or chorizo would work. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Alex Lau

Spinach Artichoke Dip

Be sure to squeeze out as much liquid as possible from the spinach. Adding spinach that is too wet could upset the creamy harmony of the rest of the ingredients. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Brandon Harman

Pocho Taco

The nostalgic ground meat filling has obvious upgrades; the charred tomato salsa should be in heavy rotation.

Marcus Nilsson

Slow-Fried French Fries

The slow-frying method is revolutionary. Try this French fries recipe and you’ll never “fast” fry your potatoes again.

Alex Lau

Three Onion Dip

Onions are loaded with umami flavor, as are anchovies, mushrooms, and Worcestershire sauce. Together, they make this dip especially hard to resist.

Alex Lau

Mozzarella Sticks

If you’re short on dried herbs for this mozzarella sticks recipe, just compensate by using more of another. But please, don’t use pre-seasoned fine crumbs; the crunch factor will suffer. This is part of BA’s Best, a collection of our essential recipes.

Alex Lau

Gentl & Hyers

The BA Muffuletta

It feeds a crowd, gets better as it sits, and is a hearty meal built inside a loaf of bread. About that bread: Unless you live in New Orleans and can get the real thing, opt for a ciabatta or other loaf with a sturdy but not too crusty exterior.

Photo by Laura Murray

Grandma Knowlton’s Pimiento Cheese

Known as the “caviar of the South,” this pimiento cheese recipe can be used as a dip for a party, or spread it on a sandwich for the ultimate grilled cheese.

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[thatbakingbroad]

Icecream Sandwiches

Classic Ice Cream Sandwiches Adapted from Sweet Designs by Amy Atlas

Yield: 10 to 12 2-by-4-by-1-inch ice cream sandwiches (24 cookies). However, I made 10 large and 10 miniature (1-by-1.5-inch) sandwiches because while I was baking the large ones, my son toddled in from his nap and announced “Mommy making cookies! For Jacob!” and I realized he probably didn’t need a cookie nearly the size of his head. I am so very mean.

If you have a favorite cookie cutter shape you’d like to use for these sandwiches, definitely use it. You can cut the cookies and the ice cream with it. You could perhaps even make, say, star-shaped ice cream sandwiches for a 4th of July-themed cookout. You know, if you’re not me.

Re, the cocoa weight below: Just about everyone on earth besides me finds that a cup of unsweetened cocoa powder weighs 80 to 85 grams. That’s what the number below is based on. However, I consistently find that my super-fancy Valrhona Dutch cocoa weighs in a bit higher, up to 5 to 10 grams more than you see below. So, you might nudge it up if you’re using the same.

Cookies 2 2/3 cups (335 grams) all-purpose flour 2/3 cup plus 1/4 cup (75 grams) extra dark or Dutch-processed unsweetened cocoa powder 1 1/4 cups (2 1/2 sticks or 285 grams) unsalted butter, softened 1 cup (200 grams) granulated sugar 3/4 teaspoon table salt 2 large egg yolks 1 tablespoon vanilla extract

Filling 1/2 gallon (8 cups or approximately 1050 grams, weight will vary by brand/variety) ice cream, your choice of flavor (I used cookies and cream), softened

Preheat oven to 350°F degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Sift the flour and cocoa together (I am generally too lazy to sift things but cocoa is really lumpy so don’t skip this) and set aside. In the bowl of a standing mixer with a paddle attachment, beat the butter, sugar, and salt together until light and fluffy. Add the yolks and vanilla and mix until combined, then scrape down sides and mix briefly again. Add the flour mixture a little at a time then mix until combined.

Transfer the dough to a lightly floured work surface and divide into two equal pieces. If the dough is too soft to handle, wrap and chill it until firm enough to roll out (I recommend 30 minutes only; any longer and it becomes crumbly to roll out). Roll each batch into a 1/4-inch thick rectangle, about 10 by 8 inches. Cut into a total of 24 20 2-by-4-inch rectangles. You may have enough extra to reroll the scraps and create 4 more 2-by-4-inch rectangles, in which case, you could make two additional sandwiches.

Use an offset spatula to transfer the rectangles to the prepared sheets; you’ll only need an inch space between them. Use the tip of a thermometer (totally brilliant tip from Amy, by the way; it made far better indentations than skewers that I usually use for docking) to poke the cookies with holes (Amy recommends 14 holes but I used this as my guide and made more).

Bake the cookies for 16 to 18 minutes, or until they stay firm when tapped in the center. Transfer to a wire rack to cool completely. Repeat with remaining cookie dough, rerolling scraps as needed.

Meanwhile, line the bottom of a 9-by-13-inch pan with parchment paper, allowing it to overhang on two sides (it will act as a sling for the ice cream). Spread the softened ice cream into the pan, smooth the top and freeze until firm, about one hour (or longer if your freezer is as terrible as mine).

Run a knife along the exposed sides of the pan to loosen the ice cream. Holding onto the parchment paper, lift ice cream out of the pan and onto the work surface. Using one of the cookies as a template, cut ice cream into 10 to 12 2-by-4-inch bars (cut the number of cookie pairs your batch yielded). Strangely, I found using kitchen shears to go right through the ice cream and the paper underneath the easiest. I then flipped each piece of ice cream onto a cookie, peeled off the paper, and finished sandwiching the rectangle of ice cream with a second cookie.

(Look, I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that this whole ice cream part caused a spectacular mess in my kitchen. Huge! It was an ice cream massacre! But, I was rushing and you should not. If your ice cream begins to soften, just slide it back into the freezer for a bit and it will become easy to work with again. Promise. Do as I say, not as I did, unless you like sticky floors.)

Wrap each ice cream sandwich in plastic and please, again, listen to Amy here. I was all “Oh, let me just get them cold again and I’ll wrap them later.” Which was wrong. They continue to lose their shape for a bit, runny and melting, before they freeze up and that is why my sandwiches were kind of a mess. “Sealing” them into their shape immediately with plastic is, well, the reason that Amy is a sweets stylist and my food looks, uh, “handmade.”

Freeze until just before serving.

#recipe

[piscolabisandco]

Hola a todos! Espero que os hayan gustado las novedades por el blog. Y para rematar las comilonas navideñas os traigo mi primera receta! (English version at the end. Scroll down!)

Tras muchos intentos de encontrar unas tortitas caseras esponjosas y gorditas, creo que he encontrado la receta definitiva.  Y además sin aceite ni mantequilla! Súper sanas!

La encontré en Chopstick Chronicles un blog de recetas japonesas muy interesante al que llegué tras buscar cómo hacer un soufflé japonés. La receta es de tortitas pero está basada en la del soufflé, de ahí que salgan tan esponjosas.

Es muy fácil y rápida para hacer tanto en el desayuno o merienda. Os pongo mi versión a ver si os gusta!

Tortitas Japonesas (8 unidades):

Ingredientes: 2 huevos 120g o 1 yogur natural 50g yogur con trozos de fruta 30g de azúcar glass 70g de harina 5g de levadura 1 cucharadita de zumo de limón

Preparación: – Separar las yemas y las claras en dos boles medianos diferentes. – Añadir los yogures y el azúcar a las yemas y batir bien hasta conseguir una mezcla homogénea. – Mezclar la levadura con la harina y añadirla poco a poco y en forma de lluvia a la mezcla de yemas. Batir hasta alcanzar una textura cremosa. Dependiendo de cada harina la mezcla será más o menos liquida, si ha quedado muy espesa añadir un poco más de yogur. – En el bol de las claras añadir el limón y batir a punto de nieve. – Con los dos boles preparados, calentar una sartén antiadherente a fuego medio. – Ir añadiendo poco a poco las claras a la primera mezcla con una espátula, y envolver la masa con cuidado para que no se bajen. No batir mucho más.

No hace falta que quede perfectamente mezclada, como veis en la foto hay nubes de las claras. – Con un cucharón hondo colocar de forma redonda las masa en la sartén sin aplastar. Dejar cocinar 2 min por cada lado aproximadamente.

– Servir con caramelo, leche condensada o los acompañamientos que más os gusten!

Algunos truquillos: Muchas veces, por no decir la mayoría de las veces que se me ocurre probar alguna receta, me falta algún ingrediente. Aquí os pongo algunas alternativas con las que salen igual de buenas. – Si no os gusta el yogur con trozos podéis añadir más yogur natural. – Si tenéis harina que lleva ya la levadura podéis usa 70g de esa misma. – Os recomiendo hacer el azúcar glass con una batidora o Thermomix, si tenéis, sino también podéis usar azúcar normal sin problema!

English version

Hello fellas! hope you like all recent changes around the blog. And for you to close this holidays in the best way, here is my first recipe ever!

After trying thousands recipes I think I have found the best one to get homemade tasty and fluffy pancakes. And even more without any fat! No butter! Super healthy!

I found the recipe on Chopstick Chronicles a very interesting Japanese recipes blog I have reached after looking for a Japanese soufflé. Pancakes recipe is based on that soufflé one, that is the main reason why we get that fluffiness.

It is indeed very easy to make and quick, perfect for a Sunday breakfast. Here is my now version of the recipe, hope you like it!

Fluffy Pancakes (8 serves):

Ingredients: 2 eggs 120g or 1 plain yoghurt 50g fruit chunks yoghurt 30g icing sugar  70g plain flour 5g baking powder 1 teaspoon lemon juice

Method: – Separate the egg yolks and the egg whites in two different bowls. – Add the yoghurt and icing sugar into the egg yolks and mix them together until get an homogeneous batter. – Add the flour and baking powder gently to the yolks and mix well until get a soft batter. Depending on the flour you can get a thicker texture, don’t worry, just add a bit more of yoghurt. – Add the lemon to the whites and beat them until stiff. – Start heating your non-stick frying pan. – Carefully add the whites to the yolks batter and fold them with a spatula. Don’t over mix it to make sure that don’t loose the fluffiness. You don’t need it to be perfectly homogeneous as you can see on the picture above, there are some white clouds. – With a serving spoon or ladle, shape the batter round in the pan without flattening them. Cook for about 2 min each side. – Serve with caramel, condensed milk or any toppings you like!

Some tricks: Sometime, if not always I want to try a new recipe, I realize I run out of some ingredients. Here I share with you some modifications you can do to the recipe, they taste amazing still: – If you are not very fond of fruit chunks yoghurts, you can substitute it with plain. – If you have self-rasing flour, use that one instead of plain to get thicker pancakes (70g) – I recommend you to make your own icing sugar at home with a mixer, but if you prefer to use cater sugar you can as well.

  Para cocinar con  más energía os recomiendo cualquier tema de Crystal Fighters, aquí os dejo uno de mis favoritos.

Here is one of my favourites songs I listen while cooking, enjoy it!

Xtatic Truth – Crystal Fighters

Piscolabis&Co

Fluffy Pancakes Hola a todos! Espero que os hayan gustado las novedades por el blog. Y para rematar las comilonas navideñas os traigo mi primera receta!

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