#listen. a dyke can dream

[orindas]

-

#growing up is being 20 days away from turning 18 and sitting in bed under your baby blanket #listening to gay country music while depressed for no reason #wishing that you hadn’t had to skip therapy this week #while trying to get the fucking federal student loan page to load so that you can pay your tuition bill #for your first year of real college that you will be a second year student for #and you have anxiety about the loans you are going to have to take out #which gives you dread about whether or not you will get a job you are happy with that can sustain you #which then makes you anxious about the state of the world and how uncertain the future is #and you kind of just want to embrace the whole small town small world life and work as a barista server and later bartender #and just make the best life you can with what you have #it feels like fewer uncertainties #I just want to wear a slightly blasphemous cross earring with my dyke aesthetic and pronoun pins #I want to live life true #ajcjkcjsjdkfkdks #to quote me at work the other night I’m just our here with a rag some bleach and a dream #cecil speaks #ellis talks #megs mind #ask to tag #I’m going to finish this fucking loan stuff and then I’m going to make soemthing vaguely nutritious for lunch and eat my stupid cookies #and go to work and stop thinking

[estrellami-1]

If I Should Stay

Trigger warning: period-typical homophobia and associated slurs

Part 1 | . . . | Part 37 | Part 38 | Part 39

Allison smiles at Eddie as they listen to Steve bicker with Dustin. Eddie glances at her, sees her smiling, and looks… disgusted. “God,” he says with a sneer, “you thought we were serious? That we’re some fags? You thought you could have your picture-perfect little dream life, didn’t you?”

Allison feels fear tingle down her spine. She gets off the counter and makes her way around the island, angling it between her and Eddie, letting her get close to the sliding doors that lead to the backyard.

Just then Steve comes back in, and Allison pleads with her eyes. “Steve? Bubba?”

“Sorry, Allison,” he says, though he doesn’t sound sorry. “You thought we’d accept you being a dyke?”

He and Eddie begin to laugh, and as tears prick at her eyelids, she feels behind herself for the door, throws it open, and steps outside.

Except she’s not outside. She can feel herself calming down slightly as she recognizes the hallway: it’s the one on the way to Cassidy’s room. “Cass?” She calls timidly, wiping her eyes. “Cassie?” She opens the oh-so-familiar door and freezes in the entryway. It’s not Cassidy’s room; it’s a room she’s never seen before. It looks like a meeting room. Her father is at one end of a long table, her mother just to his right. Steve’s to his left, with Eddie to his left, and Cassidy is on her mother’s right. The rest of the table is filled with friends and acquaintances from school, all staring at her, judging her.

She takes a step back. “Daddy?” She asks, like she’s five years old again.

Richard Harrington sighs. “Honestly, Allison, I thought we raised you better than this. Your mother and I didn’t raise you to throw your life away like a prostitute.”

“Dad, I love her,” she pleads.

Cassidy scoffs. “Do you? When you forgot my birthday? When you got me earrings for our anniversary? When you keep dragging your feet about everything?”

Allison gapes. “I- I didn’t- we celebrated later,” she tries weakly. “You said you loved the earrings. And I’m- I’m not trying to drag my feet-”

“Allison,” Cynthia Harrington says, spreading her hands. “We just want what’s best for you, darling. Come with us.”

The rest of the table starts murmuring, with us, come, come with us, and Allison’s heart kickstarts in her chest before she runs out of the room.

She ends up on a cursed-looking landscape, with dead earth and red sky, sticky vines and prehistoric-looking beasts.

She sees a clump of dead trees and sprints towards them, hiding in between them as best she can.

“Allison?” She hears, and her heart thumps in her chest, but how can she be sure?

“Alli? Baby?”

She turns around to see Cassidy trapped under a fallen tree, and she gasps. “How’d you get here?”

“Please,” Cassidy groans, tears tracing down her cheeks. “Please help me, baby, it’s on my ankle, I think it’s broken-”

“Cassie,” Alli sobs, falling to her knees next to her. “I’ve got you, okay? I’ve got you.” She does her best to lift one end of the log off of Cassidy, enough so Cassidy can wiggle out. When she’s out, Allison drops the log and wraps Cassidy in a hug. “Baby,” she whispers. “Baby, I’m so scared.”

“I know you are, sweetheart,” Cassidy says, but it’s not Cassidy, and Allison steps back and looks up with a gasp.

“W-what- who- who are you?”

His face contorts into a sickly grin. “I have many names,” he says, raising his arms as if to embrace her again. She eyes him distrustfully. “None of them will make any difference to you, though, since you’ll be dead before you can use them.”

She pivots on her heel and runs, ignores everything she can that isn’t her feet pounding on the dead earth. She suddenly hears a bit of music, which is so unlike anything she’d experienced in this place that she instinctively turns to it. It sounds almost like Steve.

“Darling, you got to let me know,” the voice sings, “should I stay or should I go? If you say that you are mine, I’ll be here till the end of time. So you got to let me know, should I stay or should I go?” Then the voice starts speaking. “C’mon, Al,” it murmurs. “You gotta fight, please. I just got you back, c’mon, I can’t lose you again. Not this soon. I won’t let him have you, Al, but you’ve gotta fight too.”

He starts the next line, and she suddenly sees something like a portal in front of her. As she gets closer, she can see herself, floating off the ground, eyes rolled back in her head. Steve’s standing on the counter, trying to reach her ear to speak. “Bubba,” she murmurs, running as fast as she can. Something tells her to look behind her, but she knows it’ll cost her speed, so she doesn’t, just runs to the portal and jumps through, back into her body.

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @andienotannie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @muricel @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

Fic Taglist: @blondlanfear @do-you-want-something-more @str4wb3rry-guy @paperbackribs @ninjapirateunicorns @bisexualdisastersworld @hiscrimsonangel @lolawonsstuff @xo-r4e @thedragonsaunt @l0st-strawberry

#stranger things #if I should stay #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #Allison Harrington #vecna #henry creel #fix it fic #time travel #time travel fix it #period-typical homophobia #tw: queer slurs #someone help me tag this correctly please #starambles

[dungeon-meshi-tournament]

Of course asking people which monster they find more fuckable is a good way to get them to say funny things, so I got a lot of funny comments on the Most Fuckable Monster in the Dungeon Tournament. So as usual, I compiled a list of the ones I liked best, ordered by the poll they were commented on. Enjoy!

Barometz vs Dryad (round 1 part 1)

dryad boobs in my mouth please please please you're nothing

Man-eating plant vs Mandrake (round 1 part 1)

getting my dick digested by a pitcher plant

its what laios would have wanted

Skeleton vs Dullahan (round 1 part 1)

why is the armor sweeping?? how are ya'll planning to fuck the armor??? at least the skeleton you could like wedge a vibrator or fleshlight into the pelvis. I forgot this is the celibacy site and fucking is not a real physical thing on here

fools do not see the eroticisim of plate armor

Phoenix vs Harpy (round 1 part 2)

harpy has a tits out kinda look

Griffin vs Hippogriff (round 1 part 2)

Me at first: really? You’d fuck the horse? Me, remembering the barded penises of felines : no wait you’re right

White dragon vs Red dragon (round 1 part 3)

It's canon that white dragons fight furiously while red dragon is the equivalent of that blue hands dinosaur in Prehistoric Planet

white dragon is cuntier somehow

Treasure insects vs Succubus (round 1 part 3)

another tits out kinda look

normal poll matchup. normal poll. do people want to fuck a succubus or inch long insects. who will win

Huge scorpion vs Huge spider vs Mimic (round 1 part 3)

What you do to the mimic is hidden from the eyes of all

The mimics got that dog in it

dark souls mimic resemblances have me thinking unwise

something about the mysterious air around the mimic

Golem vs Ice golem (round 1 part 4)

Same deal but one freezes ur junk off I think the winner is clear

Gargoyle vs Hag (round 1 part 4)

..abusive mother kink????

Familiar vs Jack Frost (round 1 part 4)

familiar is customizable 👍

Doppelganger vs Demon (round 1 part 4)

That stupid sexy cat simply slays too much cunt

Hippogriff vs Fish-man (round 2 part 1)

no offense to my buddy fish-man but that hippogriff is too majestic

Living armour vs Undine (round 2 part 2)

One if the extras has a really perturving bit: Undines fed by consuming liquids with mana. Holm mentions regularly feeding it BODILY FLUIDS.

is wearing living armor anything

White dragon vs Green dragon (round 3)

she made that dragon sooooo cunty and for what

Cockatrice vs Demon (round 3)

you should've put the slutiest picture of the demon. to remind everyone that ryoko -sensei is down BAD

no one: ryoko kui: i am going to make a lion demon that is SOOOOOOO [redacted]

everybody vote for demon! a vote for demon is a love letter to Ryoko Kui

I do find it funny we're blowing the demon whore moments on like, the cockatrice matchup

This manga is so slutty and yet so tasteful in it that you can't really call it anything but great in every aspect of its eroticism

Mermaid vs Harpy (quarter finals)

i am so mad rn. a mermaid !? more fuckable than a harpy!? for shame tumblr for shame

White dragon vs Succubus (quarter finals)

Dragon fluffye!

Chimera vs Mermaid (semi-finals)

sorry mermaid. falin fucks supremely.

sorry falin. gotta stand up for my fellow merfolk here

a vote for chimera is a vote for lesbians

Succubus vs Demon (semi-finals)

Not even the sucubbi stands up to the limitless demon sexo

if you think about it. the succubus can turn into the demon's many forms

Chimera vs Demon (finale)

fags and dykes fighting to the death over this one

Listen man. Even if I'm gay I understand why Falin is winning but- Consider that the demon knows your exact wants and desires and could satisfy your sexual needs perfectly. Also when he's buff and humanoid near the end

either of them deserve to win but demon sweep because that fucker showed up in a dream to me once

teef!!!!

VOTE FOR DYKES. VOTE FOR SLEEPY GIRLS. VOTE FOR SHARP LITTLE TEETH

Mermaid vs Succubus (battle for the bronze)

mermaids can't lose to magical mosquito people PLEASE

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #most fuckable monster in the dungeon tournament #funny comments

[colormetheworld]

omg i was just rereading keys and i realized that when garret tries to get maura the last time, jane doesn't leave her side. like she knows she left graces side and grace died so now shes not taking her eyes off maura im screaming

wow. oh my god wow. thank you. for noticing this, and then for coming to tell me.

here. have this as a present for being inside my head.

......

......

he hasn't ever seen her like this.

The police come by her house that morning to tell her that if she attends the funeral she will be in violation of a trespassing order or a restraining order or some shit, and he's not really listening because when they tell her she can't go her face does that dissolve thing it's been doing almost every day since Grace died.

She's sitting next to him on the couch, and neither of her parents is home, and he can't stop thinking that he shouldn't have let those two cops in. That he could have stopped this from happening some how, if his mind hadn't gone black-boy-in-front-of-two-police-officers blank at the sight of the guns at their waists.

"You understand, Ms. Rizzoli?" the bigger one says. He takes a step towards her, and she leans back into the couch and that's enough for Barry to find his courage and step forward and say in as tough a voice as he can,

"Yeah. she heard you, man. Back off."

They do, miraculously, leaving without any further comment, and he goes back to sit with Jane on the couch. She doesn't say anything for a long, long time, and he doesn't break the silence either. Mostly because he doesn't know what the fuck to say.

I'm sorry you lost your girlfriend. I could love you, if you would just show me how.

He opens his mouth, unsure what is going to come out, but then Jane is standing. She gestures that he should stand too.

"Help me pack." she says.

He doesn't dream of arguing.

....

So he finds a way to get her to the funeral. Of course he does. If she's going to run away, and he's never going to see her again, this feels like the last, true thing he can do.

When they crest the little hill and Jane realizes where they are, her eyes go wide and brim with tears, but her face doesn't collapse in on itself the way it does when her parents fight.

It doesn't dissolve into no man's land like it did the night her father called her a dyke.

They sit down on the hillside, out of the Fairfields' line of sight, and they watch as people start to gather.

"I let her go," Jane says suddenly.

A bag pipe has begun to play, and Barry only met Grace once, at a pool hall downtown, but he knows that she would have hated to have bagpipes anywhere near her funeral.

"This isn't on you," he says. "You loved her. All you did was love her, Jay."

But Jane shakes her head. "I had her, in my arms. And I went after him. I let her go. I should never have let her go."

He doesn't know what to say to that. He doesn't really understand what she means. Only now that he is looking at her looking down at her girlfriend's grave does he realize that he hasn't truly understood anything at all.

"I let her go," she says.

She drops her head to his shoulder.

He doesn't put his arm around her. And they stay like that for a long, long time.

#Keys #R&I #fanfic #writing #dont drown #frost

[softpine]

I just remembered you haven't seen Twilight but I'm going to ask anyway! Do you know what teams your characters would be? Like team Edward or Team Jacob? Oh! Actually I'm also curious what Fandoms would they be in? I recent realized im a Bielieber

oh i have seen the first twilight movie!! i just wasn't a fan. but it was my best friend's favorite series so i do know a lot about it! was anyone actually team jacob? he's like gale in the hunger games. the only reason anyone would actually prefer them is because they're Not the main love interest (sorry to any galeheads out there...)

anyway now i want to imagine what fandoms each of them would be in, so:

🎭 caroline: well, she's a great artist and a monster fucker.. i don't think i have to spell out what she was doing online fjkjsdsj and she loved comic books as a kid, so i feel like at the start of the MCU madness she was really hype and then she got more and more angry with the state of things

💬 beth: she's written some star trek fanfiction more highly researched than her master's thesis and she loved nsync because what is a baby dyke without her emotional support boy band / comphet crushes

🎸 danny: music is the obvious answer, but i'm not familiar with musical history so i can't go into detail 😭 but his dad introduced him to bob dylan and taught him how to play guitar, then he learned piano, then he taught himself how to produce his own music from scratch. this was in the 90s btw so it wasn't very easy to learn. also he used to seriously follow skateboarding

⛅ mikaela: she loved old school country music from female artists like tanya tucker, reba mcintire, loretta lynn, etc. she's less interested in modern country but she looooves shania twain. and she's worked nights (first as a bartender, then a nurse) for most of her life, so she got really into daytime soaps

🌲 asa: he's literally the only one on this list where i'm like...... stumped. he doesn't pay attention to anything online, celebrities, music (he'll listen to whatever), movies (doesn't care), could never commit to watching a whole tv show, etc. he's very floaty and daydreamy? lmao he just doesn't have the headspace to get attached to fictional media like that

🎥 finn: we know he's always been a harrison ford fan boy and in any universe where he survives past the 80s he's a huge nirvana fan!! (if he and jules had a son, they would've named him kurt... he's deeply serious) he's also read every stephen king book that came out while he was alive. he was a big reader in general, particularly horror

🧸 stevie: canon seth rogen super fan, has seen every adam sandler movie (every last one of them) and i knowww she knows the fnaf lore... as soon as she finishes a show/movie she likes to find the weirdest fan art to terrorize her followers. also loves musicals and wants to see cats on broadway someday (a girl can dream)

🎀 elaine: she loves following celebrity news but she watches them like animals in the zoo; ie. she's observing from afar, she has no personal stake in them. she's a frequent flyer on gossip forums like fauxmoi. she was on the ground floor of lipstickgate and was SEATED for dramageddon. and she had a serious twilight phase

🎨 jada: SOMEONE on this list had to get assigned supernatural... i'm not saying it just to say it, i really think she would connect with (early seasons) sam what with the dead mom... fear of losing their humanity... having powers they don't understand... a hot girl manipulating them to use their abilities in sketchy ways... yeah. i'm sure she has favorite contemporary artists (painters specifically) that she'd be able to talk about on end but sadly i don't know anything about that world 😭 oh and she's kind of obsessed with hate-reading booktok books to feel alive

🏈 casper: sports count as fandoms and i don't want to hear a word about it!! his team is the patriots but he's kind of a fairweather fan (maine doesn't have an nfl team so he doesn't have that state loyalty factor). miley cyrus is his problematic fave forever but he's kind of a pop girlie in general

💋 coco: in high school she was a speedcuber if that gives you an idea of what we're working with here.... she grew up with pokemon, naruto, dragon ball z, she collected trading cards, etc. she still likes anime and video games and stuff, she just doesn't have the time to get invested like she used to, and it makes her sad because it reminds her of her late best friend liam. she makes time to play fortnite and minecraft with his little brother and she plays other games on twitch sometimes. has done a LOT of cosplay. she's a huge nerd basically

#next time someone insinuates coco would bully you in high school please just imagine her naruto running through the parking lot #that should provide some clarity. #anonymous #asks #nonsims #brandi answers

[reorientation]

That was the hardest orgasm I've ever had in my entire life, but it was also so hollow, it felt empty.

All I could think was that a Man gave me permission to cum, that I was fulfilling my purpose by listening to a Man tell me what to do with my body, and I had no choice but to listen.

But I also knew I was doing something wrong, my pussy knew it was wrong. All I could feel was the emptiness inside me, I was cumming around a toy instead of a real Man's cock, and He wasn't cumming inside me.

There was no evidence left of letting my dyke pussy be controlled by a Man, there was no cum dripping out of me. It felt almost selfish.

What's worse is it feels selfish now too, a Man gave me something, something I didn't deserve, and I'm complaining about it.

It feels so wrong to let my body feel that pleasure that I know is for my superiors, but it feels so right to listen to the orders of one of my betters too.

I feel so torn in half and it feels like my brain will break, I should've been cumming to increase the odds that a Man's seed will take in me, but I also can't disobey a Man. It feels impossible at this point.

Thank you so much for shattering my brain.

- 🩵

(Previously)

Poor, tortured little thing. Still a virgin, but already having a man split you apart.

But you're wrong, you know. On three counts.

First: I didn't give something to you; I took something from you. You haven't had a single orgasm with a partner, not with any of the girls you've been with. And you just had the hardest orgasm of your life - and your first ever orgasm from penetration, if I read it right - while reading my words, fucking a dildo like I told you to, and dreaming of being claimed by my cum.

You're not going to forget that. You're not going to forget that after six years of girls, a man did that to you. That's mine.

Second: There is evidence left of your pussy being controlled by a man. It's not the kind that stains your bedsheets and fills your womb, true. But every time you do what a man tells you, every time you meekly accept your place, it leaves traces in your brain. Doubly so when it's reinforced with such pleasure.

Third... I told you to do that partly selfishly, because I wanted to know that you'd come at my command. But I also did it to push you further, to force your old self to break down a little more.

And what do you call this? Less than a week ago, you were worried that fucking a man would give you too much pleasure, that you wouldn't be able to go back to girls, that you'd be humiliated and undone by it.

Now you've learned that you're ashamed to feel that pleasure from anything but fucking a man, even when a man authorized it. Now you're torn between obeying male authority and denying your pussy until it can come around a man's bare cock.

You got exactly what you needed from that little demonstration, little dyke. Even if your edged-out brain is too broken to see it.

#kink interactions #reorientation writing #reor: anon ask #lgetsd #dykebreaking #lesbian breeding #reor: stream lesbian anon

[roseworth]

hi lauren 😌 ok if dc were to ever make the elusive jason and rose outlaws team, who would you choose as the third member

hiiiiii im sorry this took a few days to get to i put a lot of thought into it <///3

so first of all. my #1 dream outlaws team is jason rose connor kara lorena. im not even exaggerating when i say i have thought about this team (whose dynamics i mostly made up) at least once a day for MONTHS. i know some of those characters being on a team together doesnt make sense but you just have to trust me. it all makes sense in my rich inner world. and someday i may get into it but i have a lot to say

but if im abiding by outlaws tradition of a trio. i have multiple options of who besides jay & rose.

eddie: obvious answer. hes been friends with both of them so its very common to put him in outlaws. HOWEVER.... i dont really see him as an outlaw. im including him in this list because i like the idea of the three of them together but i dont think he would really fit on an outlaws team. hes kinda just a normal hero and i dont think he would be super into the whole idea of killing people the way jason and rose do

kyle: i just think that the dynamic of jason rose & kyle would be SO funny. disasters. rose with kyle is "he was nice to me like 8 years ago so hes my best friend forever" while jason and kyle. you know. are the most annoying people ever. plus kyles views on killing are sorta "i dont do it unless i really want to but i think its cool" so he would tolerate them

steph: this would be so much fun. mwsl gave me minor crumbs of a jason rose & steph team up and i havent been the same since. steph can be a little bit murderous as a treat and jason & rose are enablers. idk i just think being an outlaw could be good for her

roy: HEAR ME OUT. SHUT UP AND HEAR ME OUT. i could fix rhato roy. my thought is roy post-cry for justice where hes mourning his daughters death and pushing everyone else away. and jason & rose go "quit your job join our emo band" and he becomes an outlaw bc he wants to be Angsty and Away From Heroes but jason & rose are like "sweet we have a responsible adult now 👍" and. roy cannot be around people younger than him without accidentally becoming an older brother figure. also roy & rose make me go crazy so im doing this for ME

eddie fyers: this popped into my head as i talked about eddie bloomberg earlier and i cant stop thinking about it. can you fucking imagine

artemis: yeah yeah she was already an outlaw. but what if she was again in a cooler more homosexual way. jason & artemis had a good dynamic sometimes in rhato 2016 when lobdell wasnt being weird, and rose & artemis would be so much fun given that rose loves to pick fights and artemis would be able to pick her up and throw her. to me it would be good and i want these two to interact

grace choi: okay listen. i just really liked her in outsiders 2003. as a treat to me i think she should be worse. canon toxic dyke getting worse because of a non canon toxic dyke and her boytoy freak

dana harlow: DANA COME BACK. she was the best ever for the two (2) issues shes been in. and rose & dana would be soooooo good and i need it so bad

but ideal jason & rose dynamic is this↓ so maybe its better for everyone if they have a red hood & ravager team up. hand in unlovable hand.

#thank you so much for this question this is so fun to think about #the problem is i dont want any of these to be canon because i wouldnt wish rhato on my worst enemy #but inside my head.... comics are good #dc

[localvoidcat]

(dyke) DAVE LEE

OHOHOHO. alrighty

The Song with Five Names, a​.​k​.​a. Soapbox Tao, a​.​k​.​a. Checkmate Atheists! a​.​k​.​a. Neospace Government, a​.​k​.​a. You Can Never Know - Will Wood and the Tapeworms this one's for all of the religious references + lyrics about digging deeper into things and not knowing what's in them + just check out the lyrics honestly it's very him

Redesign Your Logo (Bonus Track) - Lemon Demon mainly just a mandelatech song but i love this one. especially the "if they fail to see it, are they even human?" part. there's a lot of parts in this that just fit i think

Cicada Days - Will Wood mainly because of bonk's animatic + me already being deranged about this song. "at the end of days my god what have i done" you know how it is

Kiss Me, Son of God - They Might Be Giants once again another song with religious + business references!!

Same Man I Was Before - Oingo Boingo obligatory oingo boingo here but it fits in some parts. what parts? i couldn't explain to you

Ancient Aliens - Lemon Demon sorry for putting two lemon demon songs here do you still like me. anyways the "you burn my eyes" lyric + the song being about seeing something you don't understand

The Machine - Lemon Demon im not sorry cause this is a third one. anyways the song's about a guy working on a machine there isn't much to say here. there's a part about fear!

Heaven Help Us - My Chemical Romance i'm a little convinced this song's cursed because the one thing i listened to it dave was a blood splatter png the next morning. so you know. anyways there's a lyric about spitting out blood on cathedral steps it works very well

$4.99 - Jack Stauber there's a part in this song with a police call it's a song about buying things. none of these are making sense to anyone but me

Cooking with Abigail - Jack Stauber kind of a mandelatech song + doubles as an evelin song? anyways the song's about someone who follows their dream but ends up learning it's a lie and that they're going down the wrong path. so

#these made less and less sense im so sorry. i posted that music poll for a reason

[phoenixfangs]

tagged by @rizaposting HOLDING UR HAND AND PRESSING MY FOREHEAD AGAINST UR SHOULDER i never get tagged in these so this is fun huehue

are you named after anyone? not technically, ive asked my parents multiple times about How they came up with me and my siblings names, but they just. didnt think very hard about it. fjkdlsjfdlas. but in a way im named after my mom, because me and saturns given names start with the same letter as our moms; my younger siblings names start with the same letter as our dads. i guess me and saturn could also be named for one of my dads uncles?? our names mixed make that uncles name. but idk im not willing to believe my dad cares that much about Anyone in his family to honor their memory through our names lawl

when was the last time you cried? i think the other day watching atla, when zuko and iroh reunite before the final battle. zuko trying to stumble through an apology and thinking iroh must hate him, but iroh just without even saying anything grabbing zuko and pulling him into a tight and tearful hug... man ;_;

do you have kids? HELL NO!!!!! im barely halfway through my 20s i should be at the club. dont want kids, never wanted kids, will never want kids. i will tolerate being my nieces and nephews cool auncle when my siblings start having kids of their own, and No More, thanks

do you use sarcasm a lot? i guess so?? its hard to gauge. i feel like most of the time i speak sincerely, but i will also throw in the occasional sarcastic quip. shrugs

what sports do you play? i dont play any sports anymore, but up until high school i played softball. i was pretty good i think! pitcher and second base. also in middle/high school i was a baton twirler for band and i guess dance competitions (i have Never thought of it as 'dance' but i guess technically i was dancing... blegh), and im gonna count that as a sport. any activity with the possibility and probability of being hit on the head by a metal rod counts as a sport to me

what’s the first thing you notice about people? probably their height. most people are taller than me but i will make an immediate note of people who are Shorter than me

what’s your eye color? grrrreen gray? i spent a few minutes staring at my eyes trying to figure out the color but all i did was strain my eyes jfldks

scary movies or happy endings? hmmmmmm i love both. i like blood and gore and guts and evil, but i also like heartwarming fluff where everything works out. i cant decide!! it just depends on my mood hehe

any special talents? i hesitate to claim i have perfect pitch because it sounds self congratulatory, but im pretty sure i have perfect pitch lmao. i cant Identify notes by name but i can recreate pretty much any note i hear, as long as its in my range. im not a good singer though lawl i dont have the technique. in the same vein, i can recreate other noises i hear pretty well, like i taught myself how to do the perry the platypus clicking sound Thing he does just by listening to it

where were you born? texas born and raised! everyone i knew growing up was a redneck or a 'cowboy church' christian

what are your hobbies? drawing, writing fanfic oneshots or rps with friends, bideo games, rewatching the same handful of tv shows and letsplays and video essays over and over again

do you have any pets? my son, my sweet bubby, apollo :> my stupid little man, hes gonna be 3 this year i think! flame point siamese kitty, dumb as rocks, currently i think hes burrowed in the sheets on my bed taking a nappy

how tall are you? 5'2", but add a couple inches because i almost exclusively wear shoes that add height, like my Big Dyke Boots i wear every day hehe

favorite subject in school? any of my electives probably, like art and music/band. in college my favorite classes i ever took were film appreciation, screenwriting, and theatre directing (which i signed up for thinking it was film directing, but it was still so fun and interesting)

dream job? honestly?? i think anything on the set of a movie or tv show would be awesome. maybe creative consultant, so that i can interject my own ideas into other peoples projects. i tend to feel my most creative when im working Around other peoples ideas tbh. all that, or lead writer/director on my own tv show/movie/video game, if i ever feel like i can handle that pressure

GET TAGGED @applescabs @lizardyeast @cottagegay and anyone else that sees and wants to participate :>

#mine #this is such a classic type of post. u never see people do tag memes anymore i feel like #i hardly ever see them anyway!

[caughtonwebcam]

characters I think are bi-coded because they give bisexual vibes and I’m bi so I said so (+ half assed explanations)

Stan Marsh

Not only do I see myself in Stan, but he both likes Wendy (and Wendyl) and obviously Kyle too, he went goth, he’s sensitive and Trey said once that out of all the boys he’s most likely to come out as gay. In this essay I will—

Regina George

Look at those poses. You can not tell me she doesn’t like girls. And honestly I think she picked on Janis for thinking she’s a lesbian because of her own insecurities of liking girls too cuz she feels forced to present as the perfect straight alpha chick. Like, cmon. Ur dream is to jump into a pile of girls too u dyke.

Ken Kaneki

I just think he’s neat :)

Chaotic bi.

Steven Universe

LOOK AT HIS BI SWAG! HE’S SO FRUITY! He’s sensitive and protective and is totally in love with his girlfriend and Lars. You CANNOT convince me otherwise.

Connie Maheshwaran

She looks like she listens to Mitski and Beach Bunny and Chloe Moriando. Also she’s light academia so points there.

Veronica Sawyer

THE ULTIMATE BI GIRL! SHE LITERALLY KISSED HEATHER AT THE END OF THE MOVIE. AND THE WAY SHE LOOKS AT MACNAMARA AND HER FASHION SENSE AND HER SARCASM ARE JUST SO UGHHH

#my head canons #pride headcanon #headcanons #lgbt headcanons #bisexual #bisexual headcanon #character headcanons #stan marsh #ken kaneki #steven universe #connie mahaswaren #regina george #South Park #Tokyo ghoul #mean girls #this is just me projecting #veronica sawyer #heathers

[detransition]

from permutational

“I never knew a woman like you could exist, so how could I even dream of you before I knew you?”

My wonderful girlfriend wrote this to me in her most recent love letter. She was writing about the concept of a “dream woman”, and how she wasn’t sure what hers would look like or be like until she met me. But, I can’t stop thinking about it, because this one little phrase captures something big about the butch lesbian experience, something I’ve had a hard time putting words to. It also captures realizations I’ve gone through after detransitioning.

It’s almost a “ring of keys” kind of thought. But I love how it highlights the relationship between knowing and dreaming. What you’re aware of influences what you can dream about, what you can aspire to. What you know informs the possibilities of who you can be and love at your core.

Back a few years ago, when my crisis was was coming to a head and I decided to detransition, I felt lost. I craved an “undo” button that didn’t exist. All I knew was where I’d already been, only there was no going back. I couldn’t envision what my future might look like, especially with how far I’d gone in transitioning. I couldn’t imagine that I’d ever “live as a woman” again; I felt “too far gone”. It didn’t seem like the concept of “womanhood” could encircle me as I was. When was the last time I saw a woman that looked like me? Oh yeah, never – that was the original goal, after all.

In that moment, when I didn’t know what to do, I went with my gut: the very first thing I did was make a beeline straight to YouTube. Probably sounds a little strange, but looking back, it makes sense to me. I was searching for possibilities, for people, for stories. I wanted direct evidence that someone like me can exist, because I felt very unreal.

I looked up ‘detransition’, and there they were. Not many at the time, but enough. There were people with deepened voices, facial hair, mastectomies, bodies and histories like mine, unmistakable. And yet, they called themselves women, some even called themselves lesbians.

I watched and listened, and it didn’t matter what they were talking about; I didn’t even agree with everything they said. What mattered was that they existed. They were real.  Some of these women passed as male, but didn’t seem pressed to change themselves any further or in any way, and still emphatically called themselves women. It was mind blowing to me, and comforting. Knowing that I wouldn’t be the first or only one like this was a relief. It gave me courage, made me feel a little less crazy. It felt like I could move forward knowing that I’m not utterly alone in this experience.

And later on, I actually met these women, and others like them. Women with different ideas and opinions, not all of whom agreed with one another, or used the same words, or understood themselves in the same way. Regardless of differences, they had experiences in common with each other, and with me.

Each strange woman I’ve met has broadened the possibilities of what a woman can be, and what kind of woman I can be. Spending time with other uncommon women has fundamentally changed me at my core. There is something they gifted me that I don’t have words for. Something that came from seeing, hearing, and sharing space. Knowing by witnessing.

My beard carries memories of the bearded women I’ve met and loved; when I look in the mirror, I see part of them in me. My head is bald because I met other women who were bald first, and through them got the courage to take the plunge and buzz it all off and never look back. My voice is stronger from singing with others who embraced their changed voices. I don’t have the shame and embarrassment about my voice that I did before.

Every single part of my body carries the memories of other women like me. Detransitioned women, butch dykes young and old, friends, lovers… My opinion of myself and what I can be has fundamentally changed because of the possibilities I’ve seen in other women.

I never knew women like us could exist. But I know now, and I dream of us often.

thinking of detransition? you are not alone

#detransition #detrans #detrans ftm #ftmtf #butch #Youtube #actuallydetrans #actually detrans

[oceanfossil]

tagged by @minecraftpissblock thank u zora :)

relationship status: taken & failing to beat the dyke allegations

favorite color: aqua blue ftw!!

song stuck in my head: none atm

last song i listened to: uraomote fortune ^_^

favorite foods: xiao long bao, blueberry pancakes, anything blue raspberry flavored :)

last thing i googled: cos (a-b)

dream trip: my gfs state <3

anything i want right now: i could really use a can of sprite rn (sung to the tune of airplanes)

tagging: open tag!!

[fortheturnstiles]

2, 10, and 42 for movie asks!!!!!

2. Your most rewatched movie 

to no one's surprise... THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW!!!! letterboxd tells me i've logged it 12 times but i know i've definitely seen it more than that, my running count for midnight shows is somewhere between 15-20 by now i believe?? truly a mystery but i've seen that damn movie so many times i can see it projected onto the insides of my eyelids when i close my eyes. second to that is stop making sense which i put on often because i'll be listening to talking heads and think 'i could just be watching stop making sense, the greatest movie ever made, right now' and then i do :)

10. Favorite movies from your childhood

i'm interpreting this one as movies that were my favorite when i was a child. i was a big shrekhead as a kid. i think i liked Shrek 2 the most. there was also a period of time where i was absolutely Obsessed with the 1968 musical film Chitty Chitty Bang Bang starring dick van dyke and sally ann howes. the song that was the most enchanting to me was 'doll on a box' where the two of them pretend to be giant wind-up dolls and perform a song in front of the evil monarchs. i think i was fascinated by the way dick van dyke moves (i also remember liking mary poppins a great deal). i also was shown a lot of studio ghibli movies, my parents must have found out that Kiki's Delivery Service existed and put it on for me because there was a character in a movie who had my name. honorable mentions: Harriet the Spy (1996), Spy Kids (2001), Robots (2005)

42. A movie that made you go 'wtf was that'

hard to think of a good one for this because i feel like i watch so many freaky movies that my bar for really really weird shit has gone way up. in recent memory a movie i watched that was deeply bewildering and also hit the perfect good/bad sweet spot was Dario Argento's Phantom of the Opera (1998). fucking ridiculous piece of cinema. it isn't a very good adaptation of the source material whatsoever so i cannot compliment it in that aspect at all but what it DOES have is gore and silliness and horniness. and that's all i could ever want in a movie really. it also has a phantom whose backstory of being an outcast is not related to an event where he was disfigured, instead he was just an orphan who was left in a basket in the sewers and the thriving colony of rats who lived there saved his tiny life and raised (?) him. he has some kind of relationship with the rats that borders on the erotic. so . yeah. there's one specific dream scene where he has this vision of giant rat-humans in a mousetrap thing. i was going to include a picture but i think the description will suffice for you because you just have to see the image for yourself in the film. there are also two characters who are like the resident rat catchers of the paris opera i guess?? and they have this rat killing contraption-vehicle thing that reminded me of "the cleaners" in Labyrinth. oh and somebody dies getting impaled by a stalagmite. movies!

#thx nicky for the ask !! <:o) #talkin' movies

[thebahwrites]

15 Questions and 15 Mutuals

tagged by @minhkhoa-khan & @forsty OKAY I’M DOING IT!!!

1) Are you named after anyone?  Yes, actually! My government name comes from a great-aunt AND after my mother’s patron saint.

2) When is the last time you cried? Today, nightmare woke me up real bad ajsgdsjgasjdas

3) Do you have kids? No ma’am! Do plants count? Cause my plants are my babies

4) Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yes because Nate deserves it.

5) What’s the first thing you notice about people? How they address me! (Or whoever they’re talking to when they come into my field of sight/interaction.)

6) What’s your eye colour? Dark Hazel/Dark Green! I have heterochromatic eyes! Tbh they’re just weird.

7) Scary movie or happy ending? Happy ending always but unfortunately my husband is a horror aficionado so I’m more often than not roped into it... 

8) Any special talents? ...I am extremely talented with a chef’s knife? As in. I can slice and dice virtually anything with a very sharp knife in a few seconds. I DON’T KNOW IF THAT COUNTS???? But I can finely dice and chop an onion in 20 seconds! I’ve timed it!

9) Where were you born? Countryside of the State of São Paulo, Brazil

10) Do you have any hobbies? Yanno, I read and write vicariously, watch movies and series, do bakery and patisserie as a hobby (as opposed to work like I used to), I collect cat mugs (and memorabilia), play the eventual videogame, listen to so much music, study random things OH and gardening

11) Do you have any pets? Not atm, my cat got stolen :(

12) What sports are/have you played? Nowadays my health issues allow for little so I mostly walk/jog/run a little but I used to marathon! and wanna get back to it also, way back when, I was a ballet dancer (does it count as a sport?) and played rugby (the duality of a dyke)

13) How tall are you? 170cm/5′5′’ for the ‘muricans

14) What’s your favourite subject in school? GRAMMAR & LITERATURE HOMIEEEE

15) Dream job? I’ve got two, actually. I’d love to “make it” as a full time writer but also I’d have loved to maintain a career in gastronomy, specifically as a cooking teacher and/or restaurateur. 

No pressure tag: @letsboo-boo @auprintempss @pixlerelish @nicopetty @floydsin @reiverreturns

#tag game #sorry i feel bad tagging people even if the game tells me to??? #no pressure!!! none!!!

[tseneipgam]

"The sun had now moved on, as it must, as we all must move on, which is what I thought the dream was trying to convey to me. A small yellow car stopped at the traffic lights. Standing in the back were four llamas. I checked to see if this could be true. The red lights took a long time to change and it was true. All their heads were pointing in the same direction. That is to say, they were looking to the right, so I looked to the right. They were gazing at the light bulbs strung around the scaffolding of the market stalls at Place Maubert. How serene it is, I thought, to sit still for a while, in one place. It's possible that a yellow car will pass by with four llamas stand- ing in the back. And it's certain that someone poor will ask you for money."

"suddenly someone was shouting at him. Can you read English? A man, about sixty, walking his dog on the path was pointing to a sign fixed to the railings, It says in English picking flowers in the park is forbidden. It didn't have to be so ridiculous, one man picking a sprig of berries, another man harassing him, but it was how it was. I pointed to the dog who had now run off the path and was franrically digging up the grass. Can you see to your dog? Fuck off, you ugly bitch. He was white, angry and flabby, and the Bird Whistler was the opposite, brown, toned, gentle. It just happened to be how it was. You can't get parakeets to come to you if you're aggressive. The Bird Whistler ignored us both and walked away, light on his feet. The white man's head was so infected with anger and self-pity it made his eyes stupid and small. It didn't have to be like that, he could have been educated and handsome and still stupid, but it happened to be how it was."

"Listen, he said, and then he listed the whole composition, almost word-perfect: slut, dyke, mental. He left out hag but made up for it by adding some extra insulting words about the Rastafarian, nothing new, always the same old. After all, he'd actually asked me to listen to his composition, ending with: You shouldn't be riding your bicycle in the park. I'm not riding it, I'm walking it, I shouted back. Which was true. When he waddled towards me, swinging his dog lead like a whip, I asked myself: What would Marie do? I swung my leg over my bike and cycled fast towards him until he had to jump off the path and get out of my way. It was always the same people making the same old."

"Arthur wanted to try the chocolate ice cream straight away. Andrew fed him with a spoon. No, angel, he said to Andrew. You must keep the spoon longer in my mouth so that I can relish it. That's what it comes down to in the end days. A little ice cream on a teaspoon is everything. His mind was wandering. He said everything on his mind without cancelling his thoughts. I made you who you are. And I made you who you are, I replied. Andrew laughed and started to spoon the ice cream into his own mouth."

#book

[shaunsummers]

Reunited, and It's in the Woods!

"Fleetwood Mac alright?" One hand on the wheel, another on her battered leather CD case, Shaun rifles through her collection as they made their way down the road. Of course, still surfacing often to keep her eyes on the road. Meeting the look on Lilith's face, she can only laugh.

"What? You should expect this by now, being friends with a dyed-in-the-wool dyke. Plus, it's a road trip. Can't go wrong with a little Americana." Before Lilith can protest, she wiggles the 'Rumors' album from its case, sliding it into the console. "Blame Casey for lending me the vinyl."

Glancing across the aisle, though, she can only crick a slight smile; the further they got from Williamsburg, the more Lilith seemed to uncoil and relax. Shaun had only gotten to see her once—she'd made good on that 'make-up' night, and cuddling was an understatement, not that she'd minded—so it was nice to see her again, knowing the stress of everything could be put on pause for a weekend. "Lucky you, I got the window fixed. So you've got an out if Stevie Nicks isn't worth living for."

Shaun just amplifies the pain by cranking up the volume, pausing to rifle for a cigarette. "Really, though...I'm glad we could do this." Though, surely to Lilith's chagrin, it only gets worse as 'Second Hand News' fades into 'Dreams'. Usually Shaun wasn't too forward in bursting into song, but she'd be remiss to not give into the good vibes that were already circulating. A pleasant weekend away in the woods, a full cooler of booze and steaks, and the company of wayward friends. She couldn't help to take a bit of joy in it.

"Now here you go again, you say you want your freedom Well, who am I to keep you down? It's only right that you should play the way you feel it But listen carefully to the sound of your loneliness

Like a heartbeat, drives you mad In the stillness of remembering what you had And what you lost And what you had And what you lost

Oh, thunder only happens when it's raining Players only love you when they're playing Say, women, they will come and they will go When the rain washes you clean, you'll know You'll know"

While at first the sameness of Williamsburg transitioned to that of the city outskirts, it too eventually faded into smaller and smaller towns and taller and taller trees. As the towering of distant mountains moved closer, Shaun knew their drive was nearing its end. And thank god for the truck, for the dirt road curling around the sierra's base wasn't as closely maintained as she'd figure. She couldn't help but wish Tek the best of luck in her little beater. But as shit as the way up had been, she couldn't help but to find the quaint, old log cabin quite charming. Among a smattering of maples and oaks, the climb straightened out into a small jut of straight land before spilling downhill towards the lake. With its green tin roof and layer of red paint plastered over the door, and the distant shed with a weathered canoe tipped against its wall, she couldn't help but to think "L.L. Bean cover".

"Shit. Good job, Lilith." Shaun chuckles, pulling past the overhanging porch to leave room for the others. "I didn't know you were into Deliverance chic. It's even got one of those fancy fire pits." In the back, a swing, some wooden lawn chairs, and an overturned log circled the metal grate in its center, leaving plenty of room between it and a charcoal grill. "Want to christen the place? Check for badgers? I can start unloading." She cuts the engine, sitting contentedly in the cooler air gifted by the elevation for a moment.