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#literally ive done all i can I just need to cover the last 100 for my bills...
100pugs · 2 years
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Hey! Looking to get a fun commission? You can consider me maybe?
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May has been a rough month and if just one(1) person would consider me, they can really turn things around!
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If you aren't interested in art, maybe consider sending me a kofi?
Also, since I'm blazing this, Maui's just turned five and he get's a churo all to himself :)
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but barely ANYONE told him happy birthday :(
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moonlit-imagines · 3 years
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Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid
Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader
warnings: alcohol mention
a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna
prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!
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it was just you and your mom for a long time
pepper and y/n potts
she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark
speaking of—
“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you
“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”
“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”
“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”
“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”
*giggling* “y/n”
“no way! that was my second guess!”
tony wasn’t used to being around kids
he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them
despite a few minor hiccups
“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”
he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair
“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”
dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!
“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”
“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”
she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy
when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office
tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there
“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school
in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close
but tony made up for it
“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”
you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool
and as you grew up, you started to notice more
“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”
“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”
“called it!”
after that you did everything to try and get them together
when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly
no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now
“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”
“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”
“wise words, sir” -JARVIS
when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all
no
and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”
(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)
“my mom missed you”
“oh, i bet she did”
“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”
“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”
tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo
but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)
and just to make sure:
“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”
“man, that’s like, forever away”
“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”
ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence
“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”
“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”
that didn’t last long
not long at all
and soon they FINALLY got together
“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”
“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*
“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”
“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”
sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!
it was completely decked out
king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!
okay you were spoiled
“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper
“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”
“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS
pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family
you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you
“mr. potts, is it?”
“sure”
“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”
“why’d they punch the kid?”
“well, the other student punched y/n first”
“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”
he literally gave you a high five when you got home
“i gave him a black eye!”
“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”
a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight
“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”
“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”
youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours
“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”
your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!
“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony
“tony, you are impossible” -pepper
no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!
disappointed but not surprised
iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer
Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’
Mr. Tony: HE WHAT
Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!
anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end
you met mr. col. james rhodes that day
“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey
“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”
“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”
you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)
“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey
“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust
literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.
“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony
he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot
“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy
then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal
Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?
New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.
Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.
New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap
watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!
“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”
tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common
you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings
Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕
👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you
“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”
legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up
anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!
“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you
ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked
why is the earth always in fucking danger
you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut
“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”
“...hi there, little one”
“what the fuck”
“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”
tony stark has left the atmosphere
you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho
she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared
plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!
only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely
but watching morgan grow up kept you busy
“ahhh, shes so big!”
happy times in bad times
bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.
but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago
you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check
“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”
you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth
best stepdad a kid could ever ask for
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //
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ka-writes · 3 years
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Notes: I was at camp. Sorry for posting late... in return I gift a long chapter!
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In Case you missed it:
Chapter 1:
Chapter 2:
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Inspired by:
Humans are Space Velociraptors
By:FreshRoses_InMyGarden_NeedTheRain
Some kids come from storks, others come from crashed spaceships
By: mmmajora
Home Again, Home Again
By: teeth_eater
All works can be found on Ao3
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Warning: Characters being trapped, mentions of IVs, Cussing, yelling, characters being restrained, nightmares, mentions of murder, a guy being arrested.
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“Humans are [add text here]”
Chapter 3: A Wild Crow Father has Appeared
Phil wasn’t expecting to be returning to Planet A112 so soon but Wilbur had sent a distress signal and that was the Dream Team Craft’s next stop.
The planet itself stood as a port market place. There were many of these planets around the galaxy, but it was probably the more popular ones for criminal ships and such. Poachers and Scientists alike came here to get supplies to take the biggest beasts in the galaxy, Humans.
Phil never understood the appeal, but both of his sons had gained that sort of adventurous aspect that he had lost so many celestial years ago. He assumed the only reason people ever chased the creatures was to fill their pride.
That was the exact reason Techno had joined the poacher ship three years ago. He only returned when it had crashed three months ago. To this day he has yet to reveal what horrors had gone on the ship.
Wilbur had another reason to go after the infamous creatures. His crave for knowledge was eating him up as was for most scientists. He joined the Dream Team Craft only six months ago and was already heading back to the SBI Craft.
Techno was pacing around the marketplace studying different weapons and supplies. Phil had been standing off to the side, leaning on one of the building walls. Every once and a while he would check his communicator to see where Wilbur was. Thankfully he had turned on his location so Phil could easily watch as he made his way through the maze-like market.
“Is he getting close?” Techno asked running low on patience.
“He’ll be here in two minutes or so.” Phil bit his lip, “You can head back to the ship, I don’t mind waiting for him.”
“I am not leaving you. Prime knows what Wilbur brought back this time.” Techno replied. Wilbur always had a knack for bringing back things he found interesting. This wasn’t the first time he had left the SBI Craft. This would be the 37th since he turned 14. Now he was 24 and the Craft had been designed to handle whatever he brought back. There was a holding room fit for literally any species, a mechanics room full of technology he gained an interest in. A garden and a gardener which was also retrieved by Wilbur. And of course Wilbur’s pride and joy, the laboratory.
“If you want mate..” Phil said, shaking his head.
Not even two minutes later he saw Wilbur coming from the middle of the crowd. He was carrying what looked like a hurt child.
“Well this should be interesting.” Techno mumbled as he spotted Wilbur.
Once the phantom saw them he strode over and they made their way over to him.
“What do you have this time mate?” Phil asked, curiosity filling him to the brim with questions.
“Someone I can’t explain till we get to the ship.” Wilbur states with a tone he had never heard from his son.
After a second of standing awkwardly they had come to a silent agreement to head to the ship.
It took less than five minutes. Wilbur was half sprinting to the lab before Techno’s assistant had even registered that Wilbur was back. Phil gave a quick greeting to the gardener and assistant before following Wilbur to the medical part of the lab. He almost fainted when he saw what was laying on the medical bed.
“I know it looks bad, but I couldn’t help myself.” Wilbur said apologetically, “I know you’re gonna want answers but I really don’t have a lot of time before serious damage is done to him. I’ll explain after I fix him up.” He glanced up with a face full of sincerity.
Phil sighed pushing aside any fatigue and collecting his thoughts. “How can I help?” He states without an ounce of shown-fear in his voice.
Wilbur took a moment before answering. Prime the silence was loud. “Keep everyone out of the lab, and set up another room.. that would be great.” Wilbur said. The worry in his voice was apparent, but Phil said nothing of it. Instead he started on the tasks that came with being the captain of the craft.
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He woke up to LED lights blinding him. Tommy blinked a bit before sitting up.
He was sitting on what appeared to be a hospital bed. An IV was attached to his wrist and there were strange alien restraints attached to his legs but not to his wrists. That would be a mistake if he knew how to take the sticky black cuffs off. Which he didn’t. Plus he was too weak to attempt.
He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and looked around. The bed was pushed into the back corner directly across from a window. There was no glass or plastic covering the window, only a shiny force-field looking thing. The window also was the length of the wall. To the right of the window was a little slot and shelf, clearly used to deliver food. To the left of the window was a place for a door. The only thing was there was no visible door, just more of the light blue painted wall. To the left of the space was a bunch of shelves with a bunch of weird toys, games, books, and puzzles. Across from that was a card table and two comfortable chairs. At the end of the bed was a bench looking thing in which the lid lifted up.
All in all the room was clearly used to keep people occupied while keeping a close eye on them. The inhabitants of the ship had prepared it so it could withstand most things. The furniture in the room had been nailed to the floor. The chairs could move either closer or farther from the table with whoever was sitting down using a strange contraption. None of the toys on the lower shelf could be eaten and all games and puzzles were on higher shelves. The books were also all hard covered. There were even plastic bookmarks in a small container next to the shelves. The window was clearly impossible to get through and looked like it would absorb whatever you threw at it. The food shelf had three mechanisms that wouldn’t be easy to get through. There were no vents or places to hide. It was very apparent they had done this sort of thing before.
The last thing Tommy looked for was a light switch. By some sort of luck he spotted it. It was a weird sort of dial thing that was right by the IV stand. It was currently at 100 and he then dialed it down to 35. It was dim enough to sleep but bright enough to see everything clearly. Not even five minutes later he fell into a deep sleep.
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“YOU BROUGHT A HUMAN?!” Tubbo yelled, fluttering his wings furiously, making him hover ever so slightly.
Ranboo swiftly put his hand on Tubbo’s shoulder pushing him back onto the ground. The enderian shifted anxiously making Techno ponder if he was also gripping Tubbo to keep himself grounded. Phil stood near Will expectantly. Wilbur shifted from foot to foot and rubbed his arm, yet kept his head up to look at everyone. Techno was leaning against his security desk, side eyeing the now asleep human.
“I knew you were stupid, I just didn’t know you were this stupid.” Techno stated without a hint of remorse. Wilbur scoffed before attempting to collect himself.
“I couldn’t just leave him there! It was a mission built for researching humans. Meaning they would be doing nasty experiments for prime knows how long!” Wilbur snapped, with a seriousness Techno hadn’t seen since Wilbur brought back the other children on the ship, “He is a kid. Not an adult that had nowhere to go and was doing prime awful things. He is a kid with no family, no home, and barely making it through the day. I read through his file and he has gone through awful shit. I wasn’t gonna let him die in misery too. If you don’t want him on the ship, then I will get myself my own ship.” Wilbur threatened with a tone not to be questioned. Techno took a moment to think through Will’s response before coming up with an answer.
“He can stay. As long as you keep him in line and take care of his rations. He is not to leave his room until we make sure he can do no damage. If anyone wants to visit him, you are either outside the window or I am present. No excuses.” Techno finished satisfied with his answer. Phil may have been the legal captain of the ship, but when it came to rules Techno was always the one to make them.
Phil nodded in agreement. The two children nodded aggressively, both of which clearly had no intention of going near the human’s holding cell. After a minute Wilbur nodded.
“Fine. If those are the rules I will comply.” Wilbur said, “I need to adjust some things, I will assume Techno will be coming with me?” He asked reluctantly.
“Yes.” Techno bluntly said.
“So be it.” Wilbur snapped. Techno just brushed it off as they headed towards the lab cells.
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Tommy was running through the forest on the edge of town.
It was his favorite trail and the only one his parents let him go on alone. Which cost a long series of promises and supplies he had to go with.
Usually he would be running on the trail for fun but this time it was a sprint home. He didn’t know what was wrong but he knew something was wrong. Especially when he saw the blue and red lights light up the evening sky.
“I didn’t do anything you bastards!!” His dad yelled over the sirens. They had him in cuffs repeating the Miranda rights to him as they pushed him into the back seat.
“What’s going on?” All Tommy could manage his throat was tight and he was struggling to hold back angry tears. He caught one of the officers' attention. She smiled softly.
“He got caught doing something bad to his wife.” She said sadly.
“What did he do?!” Tommy cried even louder this time tears slipped down his face. At this point the officer got more serious.
“I am not obligated to say.” She bit her lip before continuing, “Why don’t you go back to your parents?” She replied softly. This was the first time Tommy got angry, not annoyed or that childish angry. The kind of anger that makes you wanna burn the world down. It was a quick flash but enough to make him snap.
“You took my dad…. What did he do to my mom?” Tommy answered coldly. His answer clearly shook the officer.
“Aw kid, I- .. I am sorry.. he killed her.” Tommy already knew the answer. He shouldn’t have been surprised, but he was. He heard someone scream from far away. Maybe it was him, maybe someone else. They pushed him through a series of questions all of which he could barely answer. His mind was somewhere else. He couldn’t calm down. Everything was too much.
He woke up in a cold sweat. Tears were running down his face. His breath was rapid and uneven. He hadn’t had a dream like that for a couple of months, granted he barely slept. After a few shaky breaths he calmed himself enough to grasp where he was. He wiped the tears just in time for the spot where the door was to open.
In stepped Wilbur along with a really tall alien. The tall alien stood in front of the door as Wilbur rushed to Tommy’s bed. Tommy lost control of his breathing, barely calming down.
Wilbur grabbed his hands to which Tommy snapped his head towards the alien. “I want you to breathe with me okay?” Wilbur said softly. He moved Tommy’s hand to his chest and started taking deep breaths. After a minute Tommy managed to even his breath to Wilbur’s pattern. “Good, good. I am gonna take off your IV since you don’t need it anymore. After that I can get you some food and water, then we can talk alright?” Wilbur said, keeping his tone soft and slow. Tommy rubbed his eyes and nodded.
Wilbur took his arm, there was a small pinch then the IV was off. Wilbur quickly left and came back after about two minutes. Within those two minutes Tommy got a better look at the other alien.
The alien had light pink ruff skin with neat pink hair tightly braided. They were wearing a puffy cream shirt that was tucked into dark brown pants, which were tucked into black boots that went up to their knees. Their knees bent backwards and the boots were shaped weirdly, like they were built for hooves. They had hooves where their hands would be, that somehow had thumbs. They also had tusks poking out of their mouth. Along with blood red eyes that had white pupils. Their ears poked out of their hair and were both torn and pierced with gold earrings. They also had a gold chain necklace with a stone that resembled an Emerald. They also wore a black belt with a gold clip. Attached to the belt was an alien sword leaning against their right hip, on the other side was what resembled a gun.
Tommy swallowed down food that was threatening to come up. He waited patiently for Wilbur to come back, trying his hardest not to stare at the other alien.
“My name is Techno. He/him. Same with Wilbur and most of the crew. The only one who has other pronouns is Ranboo who goes by he/they.” Techno, stated bluntly. Tommy collected himself before responding.
“I am Tommy Innit, er- he/him.” Tommy finished with a shaky voice.
Luckily the awkward tension didn’t last long as Wilbur practically sprinted through the door, shoving Techno out of the way. He pulled a tray that was neatly folded out of the wall and put a glass of water and some food on a plate.
“Some parskey with hatatoes. It tastes good I promise.” Wilbur explained. He then went to grab something he left outside and sat at the card table. He put two plates down and Techno joined him. The door closed after that. There was no button or anything, it just closed. Tommy was a little baffled by it but looked towards the food put in front of him.
It was a white meat, similar to chicken, with a brown version of mashed potatoes. He looked over to the other two who were talking in a different language while eating the same food. With that Tommy decided it was okay to eat. Just like what it reminded him of, it tasted like chicken and mash potatoes with small differences. Like the meat was dryer and more salty and the potatoes were a little sour. Either way it was still good. He then drank the water. There was no odd taste this time so he assumed it wasn’t drugged.
Once he finished he attempted to listen in but was only met with a series of strange sounds. He gave up and pushed the tray away. Almost too quickly he fell into a deep sleep. He didn’t even notice when the visitors took their stuff and left.
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Ranboo poked at his food glancing up every once and awhile. The two crew members had returned from the human’s room and decided to finish their food with the rest of the crew. Everyone sat in a tense silence.
“So,” Phil clapped his feathered hands and turned towards Wilbur. “What do we know about the kid?” He asked.
“His name is Tommy Innit, pronouns he/him. He is 14 and was living on the run for six months. No family according to him and he’s allergic to nuts.” Wilbur answered.
“From what I can tell he isn’t super dangerous, just fearful. He already trusts Wilbur, somehow. Though I think it is due to Wilbur saving his life. It will be harder for the rest of us to gain his trust.” Techno added. Ranboo swiftly wrote the responses down, making sure to keep major notes.
The rest of dinner was uneventful and everyone awkwardly washed dishes and went to bed. Assumingly to sleep. Everyone except Ranboo that is. He couldn’t wash dishes due to his biology and he didn’t really sleep. Every time he tried the void would wake him up or he would go into a half-conscious state that the crew deemed as enderwalking.
So for what felt like the hundredth time they stayed awake laying in bed. This time however their mind was racing with thoughts. Traveling through situations that used to seem impossible before the human boarded the ship. Still curiosity was eating their insides.
With a half made up mind Ranboo shot up in bed. They stalked over to where the human was being held and peered into the window.
Almost instantly the human sat up. After yawning and getting into a position he was comfortable in he just stared at Ranboo making them incredibly uncomfortable.
“Who are you?” The human asked, Ranboo couldn’t remember his name.
“Oh! Uh, I am Ranboo.. I am kinda like an assistant, I-I guess.” Ranboo said, fidgeting with his fingers.
“Ah cool. I am the biggest man! Tommy Innit. You should be grateful to be in my presence.” The human practically flowed with confidence making Ranboo question if all humans were like this. He shook off the questions and turned back to the human who was now playing with the light monitor.
“So… what was your planet like?” Tommy asked, startling Ranboo a bit. “I-I mean you don’t have to answer of course.. just wondering..” the human stuttered. They took a moment to go through their thoughts, narrowing down what they could.
“I guess it was peaceful.. in a way.. no one really fell out of line. It was unified, creating a peaceful haven. It wasn’t like people couldn’t fall out of line it’s just they didn’t want to. M-most of them were content with the way they were… but if there was something wrong they would absolutely take any measure to destroy it.” Ranboo finished bitterly, trying to shake off his old hurt of how they treated him. “W-what about your planet?” Ranboo asked.
“Ah.. Earth is interesting to say the least… We don’t all follow the same rules. And there is a lot of falling out of line… But I guess that’s what gave it a certain charm and a certain aspect that made it brutal.” Tommy finished his serious tone melting in an instant, “But that’s there not here! I wanna know what everything is like.” He said looking at Ranboo with curiosity.
That’s how Ranboo created a bond with the strange blond creature. They bounced from topic to topic mainly ending with one of them going into a deep explanation of one thing or another. They talked until both of them ended up passing out sitting next to the window.
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Chapter 3- End
Words- 3,212
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Techno- “Don’t go near the human without my presence.”
Ranboo- ._.
Ranboo- Ima do it... >:p
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(That was a bad one but oh well..)
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End Notes: I got carried away a bit... I have a few more filler chapters before we start actually getting into the plot.. also after this should I start a super hero AU?
Ignore minor mistakes... I did reread through it this time so there shouldn’t be too many...
As always likes are nice but reblogs are better! Please share this with people of you enjoyed, I hope you did!
Go get some water, sleep, eat food, and stay safe!! Love y’all <3
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Chapter 4:
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aquarianlights · 3 years
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I am in a serious financial bind. 😥 If anyone is in a position to listen & help or signal boost, pls keep reading...
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This is from my apartment complex. I am in low-income housing. I called them & sent them proof I could pay on the 23rd. I told them I could (just barely) put 100 down now & they said that was too little.
They said they would file for eviction on the 16th, which adds $150 to my rent. They will cancel the court date and eviction on the 23rd when I pay.
But that doesn't cancel the $150 filing fee.
Idk where that $150 would come from. Idky they think it's fair that someone who cannot pay should be forced to pay even more??? That makes no sense. I can only just barely afford my rent every month as is.
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These are from my energy company. I apparently owe them over $600. I genuinely do not know how this happened. We were on the phone for a very long time trying to figure it out & I was in tears for the latter portion of it because I swear I paid.
I usually keep record of my payments via taking a picture of my receipt since they are electronic, but my dog chewed up my phone (which I have pics of if need be for evidence) and broke it, so I had to get a replacement phone sent to me from the insurance company & nothing transferred from the old phone, so all my pics were wiped.
I found no record in my emails, either.
The meds I am taking to try to go into remission and the autoimmune disease itself both cause brain fog and issues with time warping, so it is possible maybe I skipped a month or something, but I highly doubt I would have skipped up to 600+ dollars worth of payments.
I have tons of electronic and hard copy calendars & they are all synced and constantly updated so that I know when payments are due. I also have text and email reminders sent to me, but I could find no reminders in my email for MONTHS now until they were telling me they were going to shut my power off if I didn't pay this. Idk why I was not sent reminders for months???
In the end, I agreed to set up a payment plan. Paying, like... 50-60ish on top of whatever my electric bill is every month for 12 months. It was the lowest they could go.
I can barely afford my electric bill as it is, so idk how I will be able to do this? They did give me a list of charities in my area so I will be using what little energy I have to call around & see if any of them would be willing to help me pay this. Idk how those work (they're mostly churches???), so I'm just gonna try & see what happens. 🤔
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On top of all that, I *think* this is telling me my Medicaid has been cancelled but I'm not 100% sure?????
I'm going through treatment for a very serious, disabling problem that should last ~1 year and rn Medicaid is picking up what my Medicare doesn't cover and some of my doctors/specialists and treatments are medicaid only.
If I lose this, I'm basically done.
I know they'll do backpay if I get it back, but Idk if I *will* get it back. I'll be trying to get it back, but in the meantime, I guess I'll just have to pay out of pocket, idk??? Which I do not have.
I have lost almost ALL autonomy due to this autoimmune disease, which (in a very simplified form) is basically my immune cells "eating" my muscle tissue. I can barely get out of bed. Treatment should put me in remission & give me my life back. I am seeing a rheumatologist, neurologist, dermatologist, PCP, physical therapist, psychiatrist, psychologist, and going to a holistic pain treatment center that does a different kind of physical therapy to bring down pain levels (which I was put into that program by my rheum). All of these are in relation to & necessary for my disease. I am going through TONS of testing almost weekly now & trying out treatments like IVIG and chemo where I am in the hospital hooked up to an IV for 4-6+ hrs of that day and the cost of those things without Medicaid picking up what Medicare doesn't cover is astronomical. I have to sign waivers every time I get my blood drawn (which is almost weekly now), do tests, and do treatments saying I will pay if Medicaid does not pick up the extra.
I already have crippling medical debt; I don't need more. I'm scared they won't let me do any more tests or treatments if they see I am just letting it all go to collections & am not paying.
This could mean the difference between having a life worth living (to me) where I am happy & thriving & autonomous or being bed-bound & living a life of just existing from day to day & miserable & in pain & suffering & unable to do anything for myself. This is literally life and death for me because I wouldn't be able to handle continuing to live in the latter scenario. I cannot handle living like I am now. Knowing my treatments are progressing is what keeps me going. Knowing I can go into remission is what keeps me going. Knowing my future is one completely different from now is what keeps me going. But if I cannot have that and am destined to live in this current state, it's just not worth it. I don't know a person alive who would want to live like this.
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Finally, my anger noodle needs to get to the vet for MULTIPLE things. Nothing is, like... life threatening or super immediate like his cancer was last year, but they're things that need to be addressed in terms of preventative care & to make sure he isn't in pain.
He needs his trachea checked, possibly x-rays for that, maybe more...
He needs some medication updates, needs a physical, needs a full groom & nail clip under anesthesia (for those who are not familiar with Echo, he has extreme fear-based aggression & usually gets this done under anesthesia; since I worked with him so much, he had his first non-anesthesia nail clip at the beginning of quarantine, but he has gotten worse during quarantine & with my muscle eating disease, I can no longer restrain him & don't have the physical strength to run a brush through his thicker fur as his winter coat is in, so I can no longer groom certain areas of him at home, so his tummy & back legs are matted & I fear he may need to be shaved... which breaks my heart since you don't shave double coat dogs unless medically necessary.), he needs a full physical, & needs to be checked over for MCT's.
He may also need a fecal test or something else, as he has been having odd bowel movements. 😥 His tummy has been upset lately.
I have been crying myself to sleep every single night & often during the day because I cannot get him to the vet. No, it isn't urgent or life threatening. But he is reverse sneezing more than normal & I worry about tracheal collapse, which is a common small dog thing & even MORE common in pomeranians specifically. Every time he has a fit, I think "Oh god, this is it. This is the time I'm gonna have to rush him to the e-vet & get slammed with a huge bill & he is not gonna be okay..."
It breaks my heart to see his legs & belly matted. He is horrible about letting me groom him coz of his aggression so he only gets a full grooms at the vet, but I do short grooming sessions at home with him nightly. Takes about 2 hours just to do the majority of one side of him (not even all of it; just most) coz he needs breaks & lots of praise every few strokes or he will tear me to shreds & hurt himself snapping on the undercoat rake. 😥
But now that my autoimmune disease has atrophied my muscles to the point holding up my phone without something to prop it up feels like I am lifting weights & tires my arms out with a lactic acid burn & pain, I can no longer groom him with the patience he needs & can only groom in 20 minute intervals at the VERY longest. By the time I have gotten one leg done during the week, his entire other side is matted. 😞 Matting on dogs---especially double coat dogs---hurts them. It's like if someone were to wrap your hair around their fingers & then pull it taut. It's a constant pulling pressure on their skin... it's painful & irritates the epidermis. I feel miserable feeling the matting on his back legs & tummy & now feeling the mats beginning to form on the rest of him. He hates me working them out, even with the detangling spray. I know it must hurt so much...
So he may need to be shaved at this point & that will destroy me. I feel sick thinking about it. But anything to get him out of pain. Maybe it is what's best for him while I go through this year of treatment & get my muscles back. But in order to do that, I need to get him to the vet.
The stress of not being able to get him to a vet is tearing me apart & literally making me physically ill.
He is my world. My everything. My #1. My heart dog. My priority in life. My entire universe revolves around him. I would do anything for him. Not a single person, animal, thing, etc, comes before him. It is KILLING me that I cannot provide proper care for him right now. I always always always make sure to sacrifice for him if need be & his things ALWAYS come first, even if it means I'm not eating or not paying bills or whatever. As long as he is taken care of & his needs & wants are met, nothing else matters to me. And right now........ I feel he is suffering because of my finances & the fact my treatment with building my muscles up is not going fast enough.
I cannot control the latter one, but the first one is something I can at least ask for help for. So that is what I am doing.
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If anyone is in a place to help, these are my venmo & cashapp codes. I also have paypal.
💙 Venmo: @kqroswell
💚 Cashapp: $kqroswell
💜 Paypal: @kqroswell or [email protected]
If there is another form of payment you're thinking of, lemme know. I also have fb pay activated if you have me on FB (Killian Q Roswell).
Thank you to everyone who read through this & anyone who can help or reblog this. 💖
Sincerely,
Your v scared, struggling transman who really wants his bills/rent paid & his dog to go to the vet,
Killian 💞
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thecrimsonacademic · 3 years
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2, 24, 30, 36 for the study asks!
Aw, thanks for asking back, that was sweet of you @mymessystudyblr! I have to put my answers under a "Keep Reading" because I talk too much and this'll get long.
Studyblr Asks
2. What's your major/what do you think you want to major in?
Well, what I wanted to major in is not an option. The program is for a Bachelor's of Liberal Arts, that's literally the only degree option. However, they do allow for some major and minor concentrations from a somewhat small but comprehensive list. Despite this, my original desire is still not offered. I wanted classics but that isn't an option so I will be pursuing a major concentration in literature instead, with a double minor concentration in creative writing & latin. That's the plan for undergrad, it changes for grad school, and again for doctorate school.
24. Describe your perfect study environment.
Ooh, that's a toughy. I don't think I've ever genuinely given this any sort of thought! A room all to myself first and foremost, other people in the room distract me in the worst ways. A good sized whiteboard, decent sized table, comfy chair—but not too comfy! I don't want it to entice me to nap you know?
A nice window for natural light during the day but with shades for privacy and good lighting in the room for night studying. Books lining at least one wall. I just realized I am literally describing my bedroom. I study in my room because it's comfortable, it's private, and everything is mine. I don't have to bug out for anyone else to study in there, I can organize it any way I want and my bed is opposite my desk, so when I run out of desk space I can use my bed as a second. It would be great however, if my family would stop thinking I'm available simply by being in the house, because that's disruptive and also prevents me from being able to put music in my ears.
30. What are you the proudest of out of all the assignments you've ever had?
I truly cannot narrow this down to one. I can give a half dozen that are equally tied and that's going to have to be okay.
I. In a rudimentary science course back in community college days, we had to do a project that involved posterboard and we could pick anything we wanted so long as we related it to science. I chose to show how science influenced the English language when it came to fictional sciences in media. I had to draw the periodic table of fictional elements by hand and that was pain to do. I still have that posterboard.
II. In a math class I did a project on the Fibonacci Sequence (I hate math but love number theory, figure that one out) and I tracked down a fun problem that demonstrates the sequence. If you have a pair of rabbits, and the female gestates for one month and then gives birth to a pair of rabbits, one female and one male, every month, and every female does this, how many pairs of rabbits will you have at the end of a single year?
I solved it two different ways: one using a mathematical proof (I skipped over the entire golden ratio aspect, that was beyond my comprehension at the time and probably still is) which guarantees the correct answer and the second way was solving it entirely by hand. I had the proof in the main part of the posterboard and my sheets of paper done by hand on the sides. It took me like 4 or six pages, several hours and erasings, and by the end of it all—I was off by one measly pair of rabbits. I am very proud of that project. I still have that posterboard as well.
III. In a survey course of the ancient Greeks our professor literally yelled at the entire class (freshman level mind you, give me a break) to "go deeper into the material." He didn't teach anyone on how to write a powerful paper in fewer words; he asked for 5 pages, double spaced and nothing more. We did the best we could with the instructions allotted us. So, after he yelled at a bunch of kids (I was the oldest and already had a degree—2-year degree), I gave him EXACTLY what he wanted:
A five page paper, double spaced, digging very deep into the material, with direct quotes from the Euripidean tragedy (the tragedy was Hecuba—highly recommend). I took screenshots of his essay instructions to back up what I did, and I was 100% prepared to go above his head to the Dean if need be. Not once, not once, did he say what sized font to use. I typed the entire thing in size 8 font. He accepted it and I got an A on the paper. He never yelled at the class again. FYI, he was the head of the department and my advisor. He could have squashed me like a bug.
IV. COVID-19 lockdowns hit spring semester, the last semester I had with my favorite professor in the entire school (same school as Mr. McYelly) before I withdrew permanently. This was a junior level (I was not a junior) Greek Civilization course for history and classics majors. It is still the hardest class I have taken to date. Harder than math even. I loved it, I truly did, but that research paper had me worried. I had not written a research paper in years (I'm older than typical college age) and I really wanted to do it on the parthenon. Before I could send in a request for my topic, she assigned the entire class the same topic to take stress off of us, due to the lockdowns: the parthenon.
I lucked out! I think my paper was over 10 pages but I'm not sure, however, it was the first time I had ever done a cover page or used footnotes. Furthermore, after my works cited page (which was like 3 pages on its own) I had an appendix for images—one of which I had to redraw by hand because it was impossible to scan it into the computer without breaking my antique book. I had to learn how to cite myself and the book at the same time. I got an A on that paper as well. It's uploaded on academia.net.
V. This summer (2021) I took a mandatory academic writing and critical reading course—it's part of the application process. The course had a theme, climate change. I went into the course not caring at all about climate change or even knowing anything about it. I walked out of that class with clearly defined opinions about climate change. My research paper was on the Paris Agreement and I tore that MFer to shreds. 9 pages of actual paper, 17 pages total. I had a very lengthy works cited page and two appendices: one for tables and one for math. It is not on academia.net as of yet, but it will be before the year is out.
VI. This past fall (fall 2020), I took an ancient Greek literature course that nearly ate me alive. It was so hardcore. We had an essay a week, but we're only allowed 500 words and are required to include a quote from the text we're working with, that supported our thesis—and it counted as part of our 500 words. On the one hand, it helped get you closer to 500 words, on the other hand, it meant you had even fewer words for the actual argument itself. O_O We were also required to rewrite at least two of these essays. <- That's an important tidbit for this story.
Our essay question was about Patroklus as therapon (substitute) for Achilles & one of the wedding poems of Sappho (I forget which one specifically). The groom is isos daimon (equal to a god) to Ares and as Achilles' therapon, Patroklos is isos daimon to Ares & Apollo. We had to discuss how the poem affected our understanding of Patroklos' role in the Iliad. I understood none of this in time for the essay. I had about two hours before the submission deadline and I decided, I cannot rewrite a paper that does not exist—I must turn in something, no matter how bad it is.
So, I invented my own essay question and spent 500 words answering that. I used the texts we all had been assigned that week, it was still about Patroklus, but the essay was based on a question that came out of my head and not from the Professor. I turned it in with a note promising that I'd use one of my rewrites on this paper (which I did—the end of the semester I finally understood what he had asked and redid the paper).
He accepted the paper as is, provided feedback on the paper I invented, tried to explain what he meant with the question, and gave me a freaking B on the paper...that I invented. When I rewrote it I got an A, so I did fix it. But still. I got a B on a paper that answered a question my professor didn't ask. That was freaking awesome.
36. Best feedback you've ever gotten on something academic.
Two, this past summer semester my professor stated more than once that my essays were "eloquent" and that is the highest praise I have ever gotten about my writing and it validated the many years of struggle it took to get my Associate's in creative writing.
The other was when my ancient Greek language professor hadn't finished grading everyone's Exam 2 but said, "I've graded a few and given a precursory look over the rest." Then she said, to the whole class that I was the ONLY one who got the A. I shouted for literal joy in the class and nearly gave a heart attack to the girl who sat behind me (who was always on her phone). Our professor then turned to the class (she had been writing on the chalkboard this whole time) and told them all this, "you know why she got the only A? Because she did every single thing on the exam. She did all of the extra credit but she did all of the exam work too. Section 1 I asked for you to translate 7 our of 20 words, she did all 20. She did every single thing, and got very few answers wrong. That is how you get an A in college."
I was stunned. I have never in my entire life been used as an example of how to do something. I have always been used as the example of what not to do. On a separate occasion she announced that I was the top student in the class, not to be mean, but more to put a fire under their butts to work hard and to encourage me. And it did. I've never been first, I've always been last.
I will carry all three of these instances with me for the rest of my life. I won't always be the top student, in fact, that was the only time I was the top student. But, I know if I work hard, I will do well. And my essays are eloquent, and my two year degree was not a waste.
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oakpinejuniper · 3 years
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processing
i felt peaceful going about my day today, in contrast to yesterday
where everything felt heavy, like i couldn't do enough and i was lamenting my lack of friends and suffering fomo and regret for moving out here, all the old anxieties and worries swirling about and leaving me restless and unsatisfied. i got laundry done, got organized and did some school work, watched some fall episodes of gilmore girls, read in the park in the sun, and chatted with dave but we were both feeling the sad set in after the reality has started to sink in again, that we're apart for awhile and it sucks and we can both get into these dark lonely moods..
so it wasn't the most uplifting of conversations and i just felt sad, but on my way home i stopped at a yard sale and found cool leggings and the woman hosting said she was doing this partially as a fundraiser because her cancer came back and it's stage iv now and a single treatment is something like $350 and not covered by her insurance and i was like, wow, things could certainly be much worse for me. when i got home i had a glass of wine and then another before walking to my friend's for youtube karaoke which was three hours of us being wholesome nerds singing pop songs and eating snacks and i continued to drink because this makes singing and being silly and joyful a lot easier for me!
after everyone left i ended up hanging out with antonio for awhile on his floor and it was basically a therapy session for each of us and i was feeling all self-conscious prior to going out, thinking about how i'm no fun and i have all these heavy feelings and i don't want to be a good time i just want to talk about these hard things i've gone through and get vulnerable with this new group of ..friends..? but like haven't had the chance to let my guard down yet.. and i mean i did bring a fun energy to the party and im thankful for the drink in this case for easing the weight of all this bullshit ! but it was really nice to open up and connect in that way and to both be kind of bummers but like, it was agreed upon and it didn't ruin anyone's time and we both needed it i think. and we both felt closer as friends after. and while yes i was drunk i wasn't like, drubnk slurring or anything . i walked home quickly because it was cold and it was past 2 am and i drank a big glass of water and ate a tortilla with melted cheese and crawled into bed and didnt stir til this morning at 10 when the dog howled outside my window
and i was mildly hungover but you know those peaceful hangovers where you're just like, man i had a nice night and i don't have anything pressing to do today ima just take it slow and easy and give myself a freakin break for once because i dnt feel 100 so its like a pass or something.. i walked to the coffee shop bc i needed iced coffee i couldn't stomach my usual cup, then drove to the bagel shop and ended up finishing the latest sally rooney novel in the sun at a table outside, and spoiler !! but i loved the happy ending ! then i drove home and did a nice yoga flow and stretched out my sore muscles (frm my new workout routine that i am excited to continue to do actually i rly like going to the gym to do this its a very healing moment for me and my day!!)
umm lets see then . its still warm and sunny out these last days of september, and i reallyy wanted to swim (also a frequent hangover desire of mine) so i went up into the watershed, up the creek in my chacos and found a nice rock to lay out on.. dipped my lower half into the pool and my back pain eased.. and then listened to a sweet podcast and ate my egg bake which literally fed me 5 meals lol and i never tired of it ..
then i started home because i got chilly and a shower and bed sounded like the best possible thing in the world at this point in my hungover little day, so thas what i did and my roomie went out just as i got home so i could listen to my s*x podcast unabashedly while i showered then face mask nails and moisturized my body. got into bed after a bit and watched chefs table, the episode feat the chef from the restaurant dave works at and tried to spot him in the background. my roomie was all day prepping and processing fruits n veggies in the kitchen, we have her friends CSA for the week and shes slowly turning over the garden so she made pesto, jammy rhubarb and fig crumble bars, tomato sauce, and poblano bean quinoa chz enchiladas (its been too long since i made enchiladas omg what a dish) and so we shared dinner and convo, it was perfect, i did dishes and i would say over all after today just feeling more GROUNDED. and even a little inspired. which is <3
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supertweetycherry · 4 years
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DIE HARD || [iv. Girl Talks and Boys]
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—Pairings: BTS x OC
—Genre: BTS Mafia Au, Slight Fluff, Angst (a lot of it), Heartbreak, Thriller
—Ratings: 18+ | MA Content | R
—Warnings: Abuse, Rude Behaviour, Fighting, Blood, Death, Weapons/Blades and Mentions of Sex, Mentions of Killing.
—Summary: She belong to them. They belong to her. It’s simple as that. Period.
—Word Count: 7k
 Navigations -> Masterlist || MASTERPOST <<Part 2 || Part 4>>
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Chapter 3 - Girl Talks and Boys 
“—the local law enforcements in South Korea are still working on the case of the famous murder mystery of the Lee Enterprise executive director, Jung Jae-hee. The case has become a global interest as it is related to the world’s most dangerous and notorious gang of the decade. Tweets, news articles and unseen videos are being surfaced around the web, with ‘Bangtan’ trending on social media. It is being speculated that the notorious group of viscous killers are residing here in America, causing fear and a state-wide panic around the country. The United States government has yet to say anything official about the rumors. Till then, the focus has been shifted onto the murder case and the increasing mafia activities in South Korea—”
Yoona hummed to herself as she sipped onto her herbal tea for the tenth time in the past hour. Her small fingers cupping the warm cup as her ears continued to pick up the words of the nearest news channels playing in the large cafeteria.
It has been few days since the actual incident and people are still continuing to hear the old, recycled news over and over again. The amount of channels covering this piece of segment for the last few days has left a large gaping hole in Yoona’s ears. She was sick, tired and exhausted of it.
Yes, a murder happened in her home country.
Yes, the victim was her former boss.
And yes, the culprits might be the worldwide famous gang called ‘Bangtan’. A native Korean gang who had appeared out of nowhere.
So what? Deal with it! 
Yoona sighed loudly as she buried her face into her arms. Her ears picked up the change in the news reporter’s voice. It seemed more feminine now. Pulling her head up a bit, she glanced at the large TV as a new segment rolled in.
“—moving on, the three-day search for the two college girls in Beverly Hills has now come to an end as the local authorities here in the downtown Los Angeles, discovered a series of dead bodies in the Chinatown district of the city. A total of five girls were found, dead and tortured, with their vital organs missing from their bodies. Two of those bodies matched the description of the two missing girls while others are still unaccounted for. The bodies have started to decompose suggesting that they’ve been dead for quite a while before a citizen of Chinatown found them in a ditch near his area—”
The 26 year old groaned and rubbed her ears in frustration as the segment ate her brain up, again.  She dipped her head back into her arms, pushing the warm beverage away from her fingers. Sure, she felt remorse, pity and sadness for the dead girls but it also annoyed her that her surroundings are filled with so much of negativity. It triggered her in a way that she didn’t like.
That is until... a large folder slammed onto the white table infront of her. The loud bang that erupted from it was enough for yoona’s tired, aching muscles to tense up again. She had to hold down her cup tightly before it could jump and topple down the table due to the vibrations.
“You know, a small warning would have been sufficed.” Yoona said slowly as she threw a slight glare at the person who dared to interrupt her personal ‘me-time’.
“Bitch please. You should be happy that a mere peasant like you has the honour to be in my holy presence. Not even kings can afford me.”
This only earned the intruder a mocking eye-roll from the 26 year old beauty.
“Don’t you have work to do, your highness?” Yoona mocked as her shaking nerves relaxed. She pulled herself up and continued to drink her warm tea. But it wasn’t warm anymore.
“Not when there’s juicy gossip.” Her friend smirked before shoving the said folder in Yoona’s direction. Yoona stared at it blankly. It was black in colour and looked quite thick. “It’s about Jung Jae-hee.”
“No.”
The mere mention of the late director was enough for Yoona to do a 360 turn and never look back again. She picked up her cold tea and left the small table she was sitting on.
“Yuriii...”
“No, Suzy.” Yoona ignored her friend’s whining as she dumped her cold tea through the drain before leaving the blue coloured cup in the sink. “Why are you all so obsessed with her death? People die all the time. Just get over it.”
The little shiver in the older girl’s voice should have been enough for Suzy to stop pestering her friend. But like the stubborn chick she is, Suzy continued in her voyage to tell the new juicy gossip she had discovered recently.
Yoona didn’t like it when her only friend gave her a sudden smirk before pushing her right through the fire exit’s door and right into the stairs that suddenly appeared in her view.
“Suzy!” Yoona exclaimed when she realised that the younger girl had practically kidnapped her.
“Shush.”
“But—”
“I said shush, Yuri. I need some girl time with you. And this, my friend, is the best way we can relish our old memories, considering hardly anyone looks our way these days.”
That was true. Yoona couldn’t deny that fact. They were the noisy, cheap girls of the company. No-one gave them a second glance unless they needed a one-night stand or something. Yoona wasn’t exactly sure how they gained that reputation. She had never been active in her love life unlike her friend, Suzy. Yoona had kept herself quiet, timid and hidden most of the time. Infact, she’s a pure virgin, with no skills at batting her eye lashes at any pretty boy. So, why?
“You want us to bond over a murder case?”
“No, I want us to bond over the world’s most dangerous species... boys.” The girl exclaimed, making Yoona groan.
Boys is a topic that Yoona tends to stay away from. There are just too many old and painful memories associated with them.
“Come on, don’t be a spoil sport. There are many varieties in here.” Suzy insisted as she pulled Yoona near the steel railings where they found a clean spot to sit on. The older girl didn’t like how open and wide spread the exit was. She peeked down to see an array of blue stairs leading down to the ground floor. They were designed in a zigzag formation, continuing on and on for what seemed like, forever.
It wasn’t Yoona’s first time at being kidnapped by her friend. Suzy had done that to her many times on multiple different occasions. But today, the familiar scenery of the descending stairs was unwelcoming. Not to mention, the see-through glass that acted as the walls of this passageway was too exposing and open for her taste. She could literally see the giant skyscrapers from here with a visibility record of 100%.
Yeah... Lee Enterprise is too rich for their own good.
“So, this baby here—” Suzy held up the thick folder. “—was delivered to the queen boss this morning. And like the curious, evil person I am, I snagged it before she could have a chance to read through the papers.”
Yoona raised her eyebrows at this before shaking her head in disappointment.
“No wonder files kept disappearing around Ji-Soo. She’s too dumb to notice her surroundings.”
“Exactly.” Suzy smirked before flipping through the pages. “And that is how ARIA files must have been stolen from her desk. She really needs to invest in a good secretary.”
Yoona couldn’t help but smile at this. Her uncle’s plaything ‘ARIA’ has been unresponsive for the past few days. The files continued to be missing while no-one has any idea as to what has been going on with ARIA. The large casino building is one of their major money-making sites here in the American branch.
“Anyways, back to the topic, there’s a postmortem report in this folder indicating that our lovely girl, Jung Jae-hee, might not be so innocent as we thought.” Suzy teased, flickering to a page filled with numerous Hangul symbols. “I’m not great at reading Hangul, but by the look of this, I can tell, Jae-hee had an intimate intercourse with her killer. It was right before she was killed. How exciting is that?”
Yoona was spooked by her friend’s glazed eyes.
“Exciting? How is it exciting?” She questioned.  
“You very dumb dumb bimbo...” Suzy groaned, hitting Yoona on the head. “Jae-hee was known to have a special, unique taste in men. Whoever she chose to be worthy of her attention, was a diamond from the rarest mines. Think about all the boys that surrounded her. Danny, Brad, Jackson, Bambam and our very own, Taemin.”
The older girl scoffed at her eldest cousin’s name.
“Taemin had a crush on her?” Yoona asked, whacking her brain to remember all the interactions between the two people she despises.
“He still does. Why do you think this baby is here in my hands?” Suzy said in glee, pointing at the opened folder.
“So, what’s the point?”
“The point is that my dear Yuri, Jae-hee had an impeccable taste in men. Which means whoever she had sex with was just as impeccable as her taste. Wanna see who that could be? There are few delicious choices in here.”
The older girl felt scared at her friend’s weird taste in men. She wanted them to bond over a series of hot killers? No thanks.
“No.” Yoona said, shaking her head. “You seriously have a messed up kink regarding these ‘delicious choices’. I’m not interested.” She continued, standing up on her feet.
“Honey, you haven't experienced the dark, steamy side of the world of guns. So women up and sit down.” The younger girl pressured, tugging down on Yoona, forcibly. The force of the little tug, sent the older girl spiralling down onto her bottom.
“Ya!” Yoona shrieked but was ignored by the younger girl.
Suzy threw a smirk in Yoona’s direction before she opened her mouth to recite the names of the killers like an intimate, sex broadcast on a radio.
Yeah, she was that crazy.
“Suspect number one: Do Kyung-soo. Code name is D.O. Height is unknown and DOB is unknown. His occupation is being a freelance hot-headed assassin. He has a body count of 256 people including both women and children. He fights with his hands and bites with his mouth. Known to be very brutal with his victims and has a large thirst towards sex. He’s the maniac elf that even the local law enforcement can’t control.” Suzy read off the folder as Yoona sighed in defeat. She made herself comfortable on the stairs before glancing at the photo of the man that her friend was so intimately reading about.
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“The guy looks normal to me.” Yoona commented, not feeling any kind of attraction from the young-ish looking boy. “He’s a bit cute, but not cute enough.”
“You hardly feel anything towards any boy, sweetheart.”
Yoona forced a smile back in her friend’s direction. If only her friend knew about the lost boys from her past.
“So, who’s next?”
Suzy gave a bright smile to Yoona. She patted the older girl in affection before flipping the page to the next person.
“Suspect number two: Kwon Ji-yong. Code name: G-dragon. He’s a sniper, mainly works for the local gang called ‘Big Bang’. But it says here, he’s known to have involved in various assassinations of high profile victims. He’s a bit old for our age but still, he has an impeccable taste in women. Who knows Jae-hee might have fucked him before she departed to hell.”
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Yoona looked closely at the picture. The guy looked a bit familiar. Or was it his eyes that reminded her of someone?
“Wait...” she said slowly, letting an old memory resurface. “Isn’t he—”
“Yup. The one and only.” Suzy nodded, cutting her off with a wicked smirk. “Jae-hee must have been one lucky girl to bang one of the most wanted criminals in the world.”
Kwon Ji-yong, AKA the G-dragon, was one of the snipers who was involved in the assassination of Donald Trump, the deceased president of United States of America. The attack took place an year ago. Upon deeper investigations, it was revealed that a series of snipers and killers were hired to kill the president. It was a month of horror for all of Americans and the president himself. There were so many attacks, so many explosions, the streets were flooded with criminals trying to get to the 73 year old man. But in the end, it was the two Asian killers who managed to cut the old man off. And Kwon Ji-yong was one of those Asian killers. The only one who had his face plastered on every news channel.
“Wow..” Yoona gaped at the new information.
“I know right? When I saw him, I had the same reaction.” Suzy commented, running her fingers through the photo. “Too bad he's a wanted criminal. I would have loved to bang this beauty.”
Yoona cringed at the cliche.
“He has a tattoo.” She offered, trying to get Suzy’s glazed eyes off the photo. “A large insect tattoo.”
“So he does.” Her friend teased with a devilish smirk.
“And multiple ear piercings.”
“So he does.”
“He’s not good. He’s bad.”
“Doesn’t matter to me.” Suzy countered with another smirk. “After all, bad boys are known to bring the heaven to you.”
Yoona groaned at her friend’s infatuation with criminal boys. The very first year into their friendship, Yoona had discovered the crazy obsession of bad boys that lives inside the younger girl. It peeked out from time to time whenever the younger girl’s sexual frustration increased, which by the way was a lot of times. Maybe that’s why the 24 year old was no longer a virgin. The pure innocence was lost in a dark, steamy one night stand three years ago.
“You’re still stuck on that boy, aren’t you?” Yoona questioned when she saw Suzy fingering the little trinket in her neck. It was a little necklace piece shaped into a Bluebell, hanging dangerously close to her round cleavage. It always makes a bell like noise whenever it was moved by her fingers or her olive skin.
“Who?” Suzy asked, snapping out of her glazed look. She was still fingering the little necklace.
“You know... that tall, steamy, purple-haired sex god who let you ride him for hours and hours.” Yoona teased, finally enjoying the moment.
A small hue of red appeared on Suzy’s cheeks. Her lips curled into a small smile as a warm feeling entered her chest.
Yoona chuckled at the blushing young girl. That boy must have been very special to cause the great Bae Suzy to blush like a little girl.
“Hush... stop laughing. It’s not funny. We’re going off topic!” Suzy exclaimed, flicking at Yoona’s obvious giggling state. “Yuri, Stop!” The younger begged. “We have to focus on Jae-hee!”
“Oh come on!” Yoona whined, flicking at the folder. “I’m more interested in your steamy one night stand than this folder full of lazy criminals.” The words caused Suzy’s ears to turn red. “Come on, let me do the honours.”
A terrified look appeared in Suzy’s eyes. Before the younger girl could react, Yoona had already snatched the folder out of Suzi’s fingers before throwing it over the railings. It clattered down the small, narrow gap quietly before a loud thump was heard indicating that the thick file has touched down on the ground floor.
Suzy gaped at her friend’s actions before looking down the railings. Yoona followed the same movements, only to discover the large heap of flying papers still descending down the stairs slowly due to the air and their light weight. The black folder itself was lying limply on the bottom floor like a dead man.
“Y-you just... oh my god!” Suzy couldn’t form the words. She looked so shocked that Yoona tried not to look too guilty. Looks like her habits of being unpredictable were acting up again. “That was Ji-soo’s file you dumb child! I was gonna put it back. But now it’s...”
“Don’t worry, she’ll just think it’s lost like the ARIA files.” Yoona shrugged before pulling the younger girl away from the railings. “Now tell me more about your knight in the shinning armour.”
It’s funny how Yoona changed her mood so quickly. A moment ago she wanted nothing more than to run away from Suzy’s constant prodding into her dead boss’s case and now, she wanted nothing more than Suzy to tell her about the dreamy boy she encountered in her euphoric adventures three years ago. She didn’t even care about the giant stairwell that was now flooded with colourful photographs and Korean paperwork outlining the details of a very sensitive case around America and South Korea. Something that could put a lot of people in a tight spot.
“Please?” Yoona begged, trying not to cringe at herself. Suzy looked tormented between her friend and the file on the bottom floor. After few seconds, she sighed in defeat.
“Why do you want to know so much about my man, lady?” Suzy countered, not liking the sudden interest.
Yoona grinned to herself. I’m interested because then you will forget about that stupid murder case and not give me anymore of those painful headaches that I’m already dealing with. She played the words in her mind.
“Because I love a good romantic story.” She beamed at the younger girl. Lies. I hate romantic stories. They always end up with a sad ending. Like mine did.
“Fine.” Suzy agreed, still giving her friend a suspicious look. She clapped her hands before opening her mouth to recite the memorable night once again. But before she could, a loud noise from down below interrupted them. They both panicked as they heard a hoard of footsteps making up the staircase.
With no time to think, they sprinted out of the same fire exit door that they originally came through, just barely escaping the steely eyes of the eldest Lee child who was sprinting up the stairs to find the person who stole the files from his sister’s desk.
He grumbled when he couldn’t find anyone and stared hopelessly at the mess of photos and papers that covered the stairwell, revealing the origins of his illegal sources.
“Fuck.”
                                                    *******
“—it has now been confirmed that the missing vital organs of the girls found dead earlier in Chinatown, are up on the black market to be sold to the highest bidder. The local police force are trying to trace the source of origin, but nothing has been found yet. With this new killing spree, young girls are advised to stay in their homes until the culprit has been arrested. The death of these girls has raised awareness issues around—”
“I can’t believe he actually did that.” Jongin commented as he grimaced at the graphic pictures being displayed on the large TV. His elder brother who sat beside him also looked uncomfortable. “Hyung, you should keep him in South Korea. He’s too brutal for America.”
“I wish I could, Kai. But I might have pissed him off real bad this time.” Minseok admitted as he shivered at the screams he heard that day. He was a member of the mafia too. He has seen his fair share of murders and has indulged in various killings but bangtan?...  Bangtan is on a completely different level compared to him. They were ruthless and crazy-minded.
“Where is he now?”
“Honestly speaking... I don’t know.” Minseok replied with a shake of his head. He exhaled loudly and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I have a feeling he’s still here, lurking around somewhere in the city.”
A tensed silence passed through them. Their body tensed up at the thought of their cousin still roaming around somewhere in the city. It’s dangerous for that guy to be here. The man had the most unstable mind in the group despite being the oldest and most responsible. He was an obsessed freak.
“This is too depressing for my liking.” The younger joked. Minseok couldn’t help but smile at the lame joke.
“Yeah, it is.”
There was a small pause between them, before Jongin spoke again.
“I wish Chen hyung was here. I miss him.”
The words were quiet and faint to the normal ears, but with minseok’s enhanced hearing, he heard every syllable. He also heard the painful longing that was hidden behind the tone. He looked at his youngest brother with a sad smile.
Kim Seokjin wasn’t the only one who had lost his love that night. Minseok had lost one of his little brothers that day. Kim Jongdae. He usually went by ‘Chen’. He was assigned as a bodyguard for the lovely Lee Yoona, swearing and dedicating his life to protect the girl who has once saved him when he was little.
“I miss him too, bud.” Minseok replied with the same tone. He really wanted his little brother back. But it was too late. The cheerful, playful boy was gone. He died that night, taking three shots to the chest for the very girl he was trying to protect.
Unknown to the Kim family, somewhere back in their home country, in a dark, dirty cell, a man laid on the floor, whimpering from the recent torture he has just received. His face was half burnt. His body was filled with numerous scars and painful wounds. He was shaking on the cold floor as he cried himself to sleep, thinking of only one thing. His brothers.
                                                    *******
“That was a close call.”
Yoona couldn’t agree more. She was slumped down onto her soft, leathery chair, relaxing as she closed her eyes and thought about the unexpected getaway she was involved in few hours ago. All thanks to Suzy of course.  
The older girl glared at the younger girl who was invading her cubicle like a tall tree. Suzy’s eyes were focused on Yoona’s slumped state. After their hurried escape, they had separated into different directions, promising to meet up after the coast was clear.
“How can you be so relaxed, Yuri? We nearly got caught this morning!” Suzy whispered-yelled in a low voice. She was sitting on Yoona’s desk, a pile of papers acting as her cushion underneath her curved butt.
“The only thing I care about is that we escaped. And the fact that I will never let myself be kidnapped by you again.” Yoona muttered, poking a tongue out at the younger girl.
Her friend pouted.
“Oh come on!” Suzy whined. “We both know you were enjoying it.”
“Correction. You were enjoying it, I wasn’t. I was miserable.”
Wrong move.
“Fine, then be miserable forever.” The younger girl hissed before jumping off the table and leaving the workspace.
Yoona shook her head in disappointment. She was used to Suzy’s unexpected angry tantrums. Rubbing her head in complete tiredness, Yoona stood up and made her way to the furthest water station that served cold water and some cold ice cubes. Something that she truly needs to soothe the pain in her head.
Despite her bruises being healed, she still felt her body ache from time to time. The lack of a nutritional diet and her constant voyages of skipping meals produced sudden headaches and body weaknesses inside her. It sometimes affected her health in a bad way, but it doesn’t faze her even one bit. She’s careless with her existence. It’s something she has tried to work on but she never had the right motivation.
“Ahh... this feels nice.” She mutters to herself. The small bag of ice cubes was now placed against her forehead as she sipped onto the cold water quietly. The coldness from the bag was seeping into her skin, soothing the hot pain that penetrated her forehead like fire. She wanted nothing more than to fall asleep right here and then. But something stopped her.
A loud voice echoing behind her.
“ENOUGH!”
The loud volume of the voice was enough to tell her that it was coming from the nearest cabin which turned out to her uncle’s. Putting her makeshift ice bag and the water cup down, she walked further down the corridor that led to her uncle’s cabin. The curiosity cat inside her was bubbling to know the reason behind the loud voice. Her body shook in nervousness as her feet led her to a slightly ajar door. She stepped a bit closer and peaked through the small open space.
Her cousin Ji-Soo was crying as she held her right cheek with her hand. The tears that tickled down the younger girl’s face almost made Yoona regret her decision to eavesdrop. It was then her eyes travelled to the fuming figure that stood like an angry bull, pointing his angry, blazing eyes at his own daughter.
“Do you see this, Ji-Soo?” The man screeched, holding a stack of papers in her cousin’s face. “This means that someone transferred the property on their name, leaving us with no authorities over ARIA. They took possession of our one of the largest money making revenues in America. Do you know how it could affect our reputation here? Or back home? We will be mocked!”
Yoona griped the door frame a bit harder. She wasn’t surprised at the news, considering the disappearance of the property files was a dead giveaway, but she did feel a bit disappointed though. It doesn’t matter if Lee Enterprise is being controlled by her uncle right now. The company is still part of her family’s legacy. Any losses that it faces, it affected her directly. She had a sense of duty towards it. ARIA was one of the true blessings to their company. It brought a good fortune to them. So, loosing the property was a big disappointment to her.
“Appa, I swear it wasn’t my fault. I had no idea.” The younger girl whimpered as Yoona felt a pang of guilt hit her. She felt an urge to hug the girl. Despite her younger cousin’s hatred towards her, Ji-Soo was still her partially blood sister. Whether she admits it or not, they were related by blood. So, when her uncle raised her hand to hit Ji-Soo again, Yoona’s heart clenched at the sight. She held herself back from entering just in time to see another tall figure blocking the raised hand.  
Taemin.
Her oldest cousin. The brother who fiercely loved his sisters except Yoona. He stood over Ji-Soo like a protective tiger.
“It wasn’t her fault.” He said firmly, gazing into the man’s eyes who gave him birth. Yoona bit her lip in silence. She felt jealous that her younger cousin is so lucky to have such a protective brother on her side. It nearly made her miss her dead sister who promised to stay by her side forever too.
“You of all people should know that Ji-Soo would never do this, dad. The files were stolen. It’s not her fault.”
The elder man huffed angrily at his son. He exhaled loudly before returning back to his seat.
Yoona felt a bit awkward standing there. She was about to move away is when her cousin’s next words stopped her.
“I know who did this.” His voice was laced with venom. “I know who stole the papers and sold them to a bidder.” There was a forced silence in the air, before he spoke again. “The Kim Industries.”
A sudden chill went down Yoona’s back. She lost the ability to breathe for a second. It’s been years since she had heard that name.
“Don’t be ridiculous. They all died that night.” Her uncle countered, grumbling to himself.
“No, not them. Their extended family. Kim Minseok.”
Yoona felt her eyes water at the familiar name. Minseok was one of the supposed brother she had when everyone was still alive. He took care of her just like her older sister. But after that night, he never got in contact with her. She figured either the man didn’t know she was alive or he hated her for killing his brothers. Four members from the Kim family died that night. It was enough for anyone to hate her, considering they all died protecting her.
“He’s been inactive for years, son.” The eldest Lee said, resting his head on his chair. Yoona could see Ji-Soo cowering in her spot on the fancy couch. “He’s an emotional mess due to his brothers deaths.”
Guilt hit Yoona like a wave of water. Was the man she considered as her older brother was really messed up due to his brothers deaths? Does that mean he hates her?
“Kim Minseok has been very much involved with everything we have neglected, dad.” Taemin’s voice echoed through the small gap. “He’s been eating off our hands without a blink from us. I just discovered his little projects.” A slam of a heavy folder sounded among the room. “He has been gambling in the mafia since the very beginning, staying under the radar to avoid us. All the projects we have been involved in, his company, Kim industries, has been snagging them one by one. And ARIA is one of them. Even after those little bastards are dead, their family line still continued to dominate us.”
The 26 year old felt her fingers grip the doorframe tightly.
“How far off is he?” There was a thick tension radiating from the room. Everything had gone so quiet suddenly.
“Far enough to topple down the lowest of our rank in the circle.”
The circle. Yoona has heard about them before. A mysterious group of leaders. The term has come up in many of her uncle’s secret conversations when she had accidentally stumble upon them. Like today.  
There was a silence in the room before something creeked and the door she was leaning on, swung open, toppling her balance and crashing her down to the floor. She groaned slightly at the pain. That was until someone gripped her hair and dragged her into the room.
She bit onto her lips from screaming out.
“We have a pest here, dad.” Yoona gulped as she recognised the harsh voice of her oldest cousin. Her luck has finally ran out. “Let’s teach her a little lesson.”
Squeezing her eyes shut, she waited for the fateful slap that would grace her cheek... but after a minute of waiting, it never came. She slowly opened her eyes to see what was happening.
Taemin’s raised hand was being blocked off by another arm. The arm that was covered in a stripy grey suit with the finest material known to mankind. Only one person in the family has a taste for rare things. Her uncle.
“Leave her.” Her uncle’s firm voice cut through the thick silence. Both of his children stood gaping at the man. As for Yoona, she was surprised and shocked to hear the words. Lee Sung-Woo has never defended Yoona before. Her uncle was the one who gave his wife and children permission to torment her with verbal, physical and mental abuse. He let them break her down into bits as he watched from his throne quietly, not giving any care to his beaten and bruised niece. So, why now?
“But dad—”
“I said, leave her.” The older man repeated the words with a dark undertone to his voice. His son shivered before dropping his hand to his side. Yoona glanced at her eldest cousin, only to see him glaring at her. Something told her that she was still in the danger zone.
The elder Lee turned to face her, his light brown eyes boring into her dark ones.
“Get up, Yoona. I have a job for you.” He said, giving her a genuine smile that raised red flags in her head. His face showed the kind features he had mastered over the years while his eyes reflected his true intentions towards her.
Still stunned by his words, Yoona didn’t move from her position on the ground. She still sat on her knees, dress ruffled at places and hair pulled out into a messy hodgepodge due to her eldest cousin’s tight grip on her.
A sudden pain enveloped her when the same man applied a bit of strain onto her escaping roots, causing her to whimper softly.
“Don’t push your luck, pest.” She clenched her jaw at his words, holding herself back from bitting at him. It will sign her an eternity of pain if she ever did.
Slowly but surely, the 26 years old beauty picked herself up from the floor. She stood on her feet with shaky legs as her uncle walked back to his leather chair in the middle of the room.
“I won’t ask you how much you have heard because I know you have heard everything.” The male spoke, rubbing his hands together. “And frankly, it’s a good thing you know this now.” Yoona was puzzled by his words. “Do you remember Minseok?” She nodded which earned her a small laugh from him. “He always stuck around you and your sister like a magnet.”
Yoona bit her lips. Was he mocking her?
By now, she has been forcibly pushed onto a chair, across from her uncle’s table.
“Do you know he hates you?” Her body stiffened. “I bet this vendetta he has going on against Lee Enterprise is because of you. I mean, you were the reason for the death of his brothers after all. How can he not hate you?” Yoona felt a chill run down her back at those words. Her chest ached at the idea of Kim Minseok hating on her. She knew he did, but it hurts a lot when someone say that to her directly. “You very well know who was the target that night.” Yes, she knew. Yoona was the target. Lee Yoona and her older sister. The offspring of the current Lee family.
“And you know why he—” Before he could continue, Yoona cut him off with her hand banging on the dark polished table.
“You don’t need to tell me the past because I know what happened.” She hissed, trying to keep her tears at bay. “I know they died because of me. What do you actually want, uncle?”
A sudden pull on her hair was enough to know that his bratty children are acting up again. She could feel the long nails behind this one. It has to be her darling female cousin.
“Let her go, Ji-Soo.”
“But appa...”
“Let. Her. Go.” The younger child growled before letting go of Yoona’s hair. The 26 year old was surprised at the sudden change in her younger cousin’s behaviour. One moment she was crying and the second she’s on her feet like a wild cat, ready to tear her apart.
“What do you want from me?” Yoona demanded after a full minute of silence.
Traces of a faint smile appeared on her uncle’s lips. He pulled something out of his nearest cabinet and slapped it down onto the table infront of her. She stared at it blankly. It was a large yellow envelope about the size of an A4 page.
“I want you to go on a little trip for me. It’s indefinite of course.” He pointed to the envelope. “All your tickets, identity papers and everything else is in that envelope. You are going to be starting a new life. A new name, a new look and a new identity. Congrats Yoona, you are the new executive director of Lee Enterprise for the Korean branch. You’re going back home.”
“What?!” Three different voices in the room screamed, and Yoona was one of them.
“What do you mean?” She asked, stunned at the words he just blurted out.
His children were also looking at him in shock. Ji-soo’s hand was curled around a nearby couch pillow while Taemin’s fist was turning white due to the pressure he was applying on the chair next to Yoona.
The 26 year old flinched when the leather of the chair curved inwards at the raw strength. She looked at her uncle in obvious shock and fear.
“We need a new person to take the position. It been chaotic in our home country. Since you are practically useless to me right now, I have assigned you as the acting head. The position is yours to work with.”
“What—No!” Ji-Soo said in outrage. “That’s my position! How could you just give it to her?”
“I don’t need to explain my reasons to you, Ji-Soo.”
“But appa—” the girl looked appalled at her father.
“Leave my office. Both of you. Now.” The direct order was cold and piercing to his children’s hearts. The man who had never raised his voice on his kids, unless they did something wrong, is choosing their dirty cousin over them.
When Yoona heard the loud slams of the cabin’s door, she lifted her eyes up to the old man.
“Let’s talk in peace, shall we?”
                                                  ********
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Meanwhile, miles away from America and right into the heart of South Korea, a dark figure, clad in the most darkest attire of an assassin, battled his way through a crowd of armed men as his silver blade pierced through their bodies one by one. With each duck and with each stroke of his blade, blood spilled out onto him like splashes of water. The oncoming rain from above hit him like bullets as he rolled on the wet pavement and slashed at yet another men. His clothing that was designed in the most expensive polymer, tightened around his lean figure as he bent, jumped and rolled under various stalls to avoid the oncoming slaughter of the real bullets, aimed directly at his prominent limbs.
“Ya, hyung!” A childish voice whined from behind him. “Hurry up and save me already. I’m hungry!” A young boy said, jingling the silver metal cuffs on his wrist. He was sitting on a nearby stall, sucking onto a lollipop as armed men surrounded him.
The boy was unfazed by the ring leader who tried to make him cower in fear.
“Pali, Pali hyung!” He whined again when the ring leader tried to take away his lollipop. “Ya! You little cockroach, let go of my lollipop or I swear I’ll stuff your butthole with them.”
The assassin who was in the middle of a trio fight, shook his head in annoyance. He bent and rolled on the ground, letting his blade do the work instead.
“Aish.. this kid.” He muttered to himself before throwing one of his trusty knives at the grubby hands of the ring leader. The old, puggy man screeched in pain as his right hand is pierced by a pointy blade in the shape of a Star. “Stay the fuck away from my brother’s lollipop!”
The said brother smiled and continued to suck on the juicy blob of sugar.
Another minute passed, and the assassin’s enemies has decreased in numbers. Bodies piled up the wet pavement as the last of the armed men fell to the ground with a sliced neck. The only one remained was the puggy ring leader and his two trusted men.
“Daebak! Hyung, your awesome!” The younger boy cheered, clapping his cuffed hands together like a teenage Pom Pom girl. His light brown hair also bounced as he jumped up and down.“I feel so proud. My hyung is the best!”
The said hyung scoffed. He has heard that line several times from the younger boy on many different occasions.
“You say the same thing to others, Jungkookie.”
“No, I don’t.” The boy lied, giving the elder a huge, innocent pout. The tongue that has now turned blue due to the lollipop he has been sucking, lapsed around his puffy lips like a little boy. “Pali, Pali! Save me and let’s go for dinner.” He whined again, pouting his lips and widening his doe-eyes.
“Aish...” The said assassin grumbled before raising his sword like a true ninja. He grit his teeth and charged at the last remaining set of men.
A minute later, all three them fell lifelessly on the ground with broken limbs. The younger bunny boy cheered, jumping on the stall like a little kid.
“Yay! Let’s go for hotdogs now!”
The assassin clad in black huffed and wiped his sword clean with his sleeves. He stashed it back into its holster behind him before tugging on his younger brother’s metal cuffs and pulling him off the stall with one hard pull.
The said boy stumbled to his feet before landing on the wet pavement with a thud. His pretty, child-like face turned into a scowl as he felt the rain water seep into his black pants.
“Hyung!” He exclaimed angrily.
“This is the only favour I’m doing for you, Jungkookie” The assassin said in a husky voice as he removed his face mask. He pulled his hood back, revealing a nest of dark orange hair. “Go back home or I’ll dob on you. Next time you get kidnapped by goons, fight your way out. Don’t call me for help.”
“But it’s fun watching you fight.” The boy whined innocently. But he stopped when he noticed his hyung’s narrowed eyes. “Fine. Whatever.”
And with that he pulled himself up on his feet, discarding the metal cuffs on the ground with no help. His hands swiped another lollipop out of his pocket before he skipped away, throwing a simple smirk over his shoulders.
“I swear I’m going to skewer him one day.” The assassin mumbled before shaking his head. Who is he kidding? The bright, sunny angel inside him would never let the dark ninja kill his maknae.
Stupid brotherly bonds.
Tag List: @demonic-meatball​, @youtube-obsessed-duh​, @trinityautumn​, @original-internetmonster​, @seoul9711​, @jinniesjoon94​
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velveteencurtains · 3 years
Text
evermore first impressions!
willow - GIRL EUEJDNSKJDJEJD LOST IN YOUR CURRENT LIKE A PRICELESS WIINE!!!!! TAKE MY HAND!!! WRECK MY PLANS!!! THATS MY MAN!!!!!! girl this is so fcuking GOOD! gonna be 100% honest the 1 is a better album opening but this is so fucking good you guys. life was a willow and it bent right to your wind!!! ID COME BACK STRONGER THAN A 90’S TREND???? EVERY BAIT AND SWITCH WAS A WORK OF ART??? SHES SICK SHES REALLY SICK I SWEAR. the way she sings “that’s my man!” yes ma’am yes ma’am!!!!!! the parallel between “I knew you stepping on the last train” and then “you know my train could take you home” SHES SICK YOUR HONOR SHES SICK
champagne problems - okay we love a piano opener. i’m so conflicted on what i think this song is gonna be about. MORE TRAIN LYRICS GIRLIE. this really is this is me trying’s older, sadder sister. “our group of friends/don’t think we’ll say that word again” MA’AM??? SHE WOULD HAVE MADE SUCH A LOVELY BRIDE SUCH A SHAME SHES FUCKED IN THE HEAD??????? IM LOSIJG MY FUCKIJG MIND. taylor and joe wrote this together? we love a couple with shared mental illnesses
gold rush - jack antonoff do not let me down. GIRL THE HARMONIES AT THE VERY BEGINNING JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE. okay I can definitely see what they meant by this song being about being lost in a daydream, the juxtaposition between the chorus and the verses is AMAZING. this is just gorgeous’s older sister huh???? “ocean blue eyes/looking in mine/i feel like i might sink and drown and die” and “eyes like sinking/ships on waters/so inviting/i almost jump in”
‘tis the damn season - i can’t tell if i want this song to be christmassy or not. OH SO THIS IS JUST HOLIDATE. TAYLOR JUST WATCHED HOLIDATE AND WROTE A SONG ABOUT IT. this is a continuation of tim mcgraw, argue with the wall. NO BC TIM MCGRAW IS ABOUT LIKE A LOVE FROM HIGH SCHOOL AND THIS IS LIKE COMING HOME FROM COLLEGE AND REUNITING WITH THEM BC YOURE BOTH DEPRESSED AND LONELY
tolerate it - jesus christ i’m not emotionally ready for this. STOP THIS IS THE PRELUDE TO BETTER MAN. LIKE BETTER MAN IS AFTER SHES ALREADY LEFT BUT THIS IS BEFORE WHEN SHES STUCK AND KNOW SHE DESERVES BETTER BUT SHE JUST TAKES IT IM GONNA CRYYYYYYYYYYY. okay but i’m imagining the babe music video and that whole of like the doting housewife who gave up everything for her husband and does everything to make him happy but he just does not appreciate it at all and he doesn’t see how much his indifference hurts her. @taylorswift mv now. honestly? loved that but as a track 5 it’s pretty weak
no body, no crime - I PREDICTED THIS WAS GONNA BE MY TOP SONG ON THE ALBUM LETS SEE IF I’M RIGHT. GIRL THE SIRENS AND “HE DID IT” AS THE FIRST LINES?? THEN THE COUNTRY INSTRUMENTAL??? TAYLOR HAS FINALLY GIVEN ME A GOOD OLD FASHIONED “MURDERED MY CHEATING HUSBAND” COUNTRY SONG HELL YESSSSSSS. OH THE WIFE IS MISSING???? NOT GONE GIRLLLLLLLLL MISS TAYLOR CHANNELING AMY DUNNE HERE!!!!! OH SHUT UPPPPPP SHES A LESBIAN WITH ESTE’S SISTER AND THEY COVERED UP HIS MURDER AND NOW THEYRE GONNA LESBIAN TOGETHER MISS TAYLOR
happiness - okay miss happiness you’ve got a lot to live up to but let’s do this. NOT THE MIRRORBALL PARALLEL “i was dancing when the music stopped” and “when no one is around, my dear/you’ll find me on my tallest top toes/spinning in my highest heels, love” NOT THE IDEA OF CHANGING YOURSELF JUST TO KEEP SOMEONE BY YOUR SIDE IM GONNA SOB taylor please stop this i cant emotionally handle any of this. girl this is the prelude to tolerate it which is the prelude to better man
dorothea - okay so seven’s older sister? so dorothea and whoever this singer is were besties when they were teens and then dorothea moved away and now the singer misses her former best friend and also first love and also they’re lesbians yeah it’s gay it’s so gay. taylor i’m literally begging you from the bottom of my fucking soul please give us a music video with two girls please miss swift i ask of you this one (1) thing
coney island - see i thought this was gonna be seven’s older sister when the tracklist was announced so now idk what to expect! JESUS OKAY I KNOW IT SAYS “feat. The National” IN THE TITLE BUT I FORGOT AND I GOT SCARED BY HIS VOICE. NOT A FUCKIJG CAR ACCIDENT TAYLOR IM REALLY SORRY I RRALIZE YOU ARE YOUR OWN PERSON AND I NEED TO STOP CONNECTING YOU TO HARRY BUT REALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. okay anyway here’s my theory hear me out: This is dorothea’s husband who’s confused why his high school sweetheart wife doesn’t love him anymore and why she’s now hanging out with her old high school best friend again damn that’s weird they’re like really super close that’s super odd. anyway that’s just a theory I actually don’t really know what this songs about! miss swift is too smart for me
ivy - stop this song is so sweet!!!!!! i feel like this is getaway car’s sister! i need to stop doing that i know it gets annoying but really honestly it is! NO NO NO THIS IS DOROTHEA’S PERSPECTIVE WHEN SHE HAS AN AFFAIR WITH HER HS BESTIE AND HER HUSBAND STARTS TO FIND OUT GUYS IVE FIGURED IT OUTTTTTTT. WAIT WAIT WAIT THE HS BESTIE IS FROM NO BODY NO CRIME AND DOROTHEA IS ESTE’S SISTER GUYS IVE FIGURED IT THE FUCK OUT YOU GUYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I GOT IT
cowboy like me - let’s yee and let’s haw ladies and gents. WHOS SINGING????? WHOS SINGING WITH HER???? taylor shut up for a second lemme hear who tf this is. AM I CRAZY OR IS THIS JOE???? i’m probably dumb. but am i? why can i not at all remember what joe’s voice sounds like rn. is that joe??? im so confused. maybe i’m super dumb and it’s really obvious and i’m just fucking stupid. it’s probably not joe it’s probably some country legend that everyone else knows bc they grew up yeeing and hawing and i’m but a wee city slicker but i’m gonna hold onto this stupid theory that it’s joe singing with her until someone proves me wrong later. also this song is fucking gorgeous where’s my cowboy hat not wearing one while listening to this song makes me feel sacrelige. okay wait tay and aaron wrote this one is it aaron? i’m sorry taylor i don’t listen to the national you can hate me if you want
long story short - god the production on this slaps!!!!! and the idea of being hurt before and then finding your love and being all about them and not even caring abt what happened before!!!!! god i’m gonna cry i’m gonna cry. NO MORE KEEPING SCORE NOW I JUST KEEP YOU WARM?????? taylor really said “oh you’re not in love and i’m gonna make you feel like SHIT ABOUT IT” taylor pls a petition to let us say “BITCH” after the last line so it’s “i survived...bitch!” okay pls and thank you
marjorie - oh is this about taylor’s grandma :(((( i knew she used her name but this feels like it’s really all about her. babey. this is so sweet. taylor i love you
closure - okay the opening??? slaps! literally! okay the production of this is interesting! okay i’m like trying to figure out who this is about....who cares this is so good. oh my god the distortion??? it just underlines the anger of it all so perfectly and i love
evermore - exile hive let’s GOOOO. please be an exile pt 2 pls be an exile pt 2. so odd to me because, as a whole, this actually feels like a way more happy and optimistic album than folklore did, yet the title comes from the line “i had a feeling so peculiar/that this pain would be for/evermore”. OKAY BON IVERRRRRR. the violence of the dog days? that’s my next instagram caption thanks taylor. NOT A DUET SECTION AGAIN LIKE IN EXILE TAYLOR PLEASE I CANT HANDLE THISSSSSSS. “we always walked a very thin line” AND “is there a line that we could just go cross?” THE PARALELLELLLLRJSNDBBD. I’m gonna die for this I really think. okay so she ends it on this pain wouldn’t last evermore so that’s good
overall? this is a masterpiece. miss swift has done it again. folklore aoty 2021 and evermore aoty 2022. no body, no crime is really THAT BITCH. i need a mv miss swift! okay bye gonna go cry over this
update: after listening all night i feel like i need to point out that i’m stupid and thought este was the mistress and the singer was the wife when in fact ESTE is the wife in no body, no crime. SO addendum to my theory: este and dorothea were besties in hs then dorothea left and got married and so did este but este’s hubby cheated so then este’s friend murders him and she’s cool w it, then dorothea and her husband move back home and este and dorothea reconnect and realize their long hidden feelings for one another, dorothea leaves her husband and she and este run away together
ANOTHER UPDATE: ‘TIS THE DAMN SEASON IS FROM DOROTHEA’S POINT OF VIEW!!!!!!!! WHEN SHE COMES HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS AND SHES SINGING TO ESTE!!!!!! CJNECNSJSNNDN
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A Bump in the Road - Morgan Rielly
Request: 44. You need to see a doctor.” Morgan Rielly
I winced as I got off the sofa, I had been feeling off for a couple of days now but I just chalked it up to my period and the cramps being extra bad this month. It didn’t help that Mo was out of town on a super long road trip and that always put me in a funk. But he was coming home today and I was ready to spend some time with him. I was picking Morgan up from the airport so I threw on some leggings and one of Morgan’s old sweatshirts. 
Getting into the car, I tried to push off the discomfort and focused on the road ahead of me. I managed to pull into the parking lot of the airport just as Morgan texted that they landed. Heading inside the small, private terminal they would be coming through I found a couple of the other girls waiting. Alannah waved me over, smiling as I sat down next to her. “Are you okay Samantha? You look a little pale.”
“Yeah.” Alannah looked like she was going to push more but the guys showed up then. I was slow to get out of the seat so Alannah said something to Morgan before going to Zach. I had just stood up by the time Morgan got to me. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too. Alannah said you don’t feel good.”
“I’m fine, it’s just cramps from my period.” Morgan grabbed his bag as we headed out to the car, I didn’t even argue with him when he motioned for the car keys. 
“You’re period isn’t for another 4 days and you only start cramping the day before. You look really pale.” I got into the passenger seat and winced as I twisted to get my seatbelt on. Morgan looked super concerned, reaching over to feel my forehead. “And you feel warm. How long have you been feeling like this?”
“A day or two. I probably just ate something bad.”
“You need to see a doctor Sam.” I really wanted to roll my eyes at him but I also knew he was just worried about me.
“I’ll get an appointment for tomorrow.” That seemed to make Morgan happy because he didn’t bring it up on the way home, letting me call to make an appointment before we cuddled on the sofa. As we caught up on tv I started to feel worse, trying to hide it from Morgan so he wouldn’t worry. That all went out the window when I stood up to get a drink and I literally swayed before falling back onto the sofa. 
“That’s it, we are going to the ER now.”
“Mo…”
“No, you just almost fainted. You need to see a doctor. Right now.” His face was as serious as I had ever seen, even when he was on the ice in a tight playoff game. “You are going to sit here while I go get pants for both of us and your purse. Then we are getting in my car and I am driving us to the hospital.” I just nodded, wincing as I moved on the sofa. Morgan left the room quickly, I could hear him down in the bedroom. He came rushing back, pulling on a sweatshirt and carrying sweatpants for me. “Do you need help getting these on while I grab your bag?” 
I just shook my head, slowly pulling on my sweatpants. I barely had both legs in the sweatpants by the time Morgan returned, carefully helping me stand up and pulling the sweatpants up before looking me in the eyes. “I have your purse with your wallet, your water bottle, some snacks, an ipad, and some headphones.” I nodded and before I could say anything Morgan picked me up and moved towards the door. He hurried us out of the apartment and down to the car, buckling me in before hurrying around to the driver's seat. I closed my eyes as Morgan started to drive, even with my eyes closed I knew he was speeding as much as he could in a big city with so many traffic lights.
Before I knew it Morgan was stopping and getting out of the car, my eyes opened to see him hurrying across the front of the car with the backpack before helping me out of the car. He had actually parked the car and was now carrying me through the parking garage to the emergency department entrance. A nurse spotted us as soon as we entered, bringing a wheelchair over for me. As much as I didn't want to admit it, the pain was much worse now and I was so out of it that Morgan had to do all the talking to get me checked in. Once that was all done we were moved back to a room and Morgan lifted me onto the bed. 
The next few minutes were a flurry of activity, a nurse getting me on an iv as a doctor came in and started to ask questions. They must have given me something for the pain because I was finally about to focus on what the doctor was saying. "Your boyfriend said that you have been having bad stomach pain for a few days now?"
"Yeah, at first I thought it was just cramping but it is much more painful than any cramp I have ever had."
"I'm going to run some tests and we will figure this out." He spoke to the nurse before leaving the room with a nod. Once the nurse was also done I turned to look at Morgan who looked terrified.
"I'm going to text Kyle and Sheldon to let them know I probably won't be at practice tomorrow." I wanted to argue but the concerned look that covered Morgan’s face was enough to stop me before I spoke up, just nodding and watching him type out a text. When that was done he put his phone away and grabbed my hand. “How are you feeling?”
“Like there is a knife in my stomach, but besides that I’m fine. How was your road trip?” Morgan raised an eyebrow, making me laugh. “It will distract me until the doctor comes back.” 
“Fine.” With that Morgan launched into a story of the shenanigans that he and his teammates got into during their trip. As Morgan was telling me about Mitch hiding Auston’s gear before a practice. The story made me laugh which caused pain that I was trying to hide from Morgan. "I'm hurting you by making you laugh. Is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable?"
“No, I think it’s just something I have to deal with until the doctor figures it out.” Morgan held onto my hand as we waited, telling me more about the road trip until the doctor came into the room around 30 minutes later.
“Ms. Kennedy, we got the results of your test back. Your appendix is about to burst. We need to get you into surgery right away. The complications if we wait too long are severe so time is of the essence. Our plan is to do it laparoscopically, that might change once we are in there. The surgery should last about an hour as long as everything goes to plan. Do you have any questions?”
“What is the recovery time?”
“You will probably have to stay in the hospital for a day or two, maybe 3 if there are any complications. You should be back to regular daily activities in 2 to 4 weeks, nothing too strenuous for the first week or so. Anything else?” We both say no, the doctor shaking both of our hands before moving towards the door. “Someone will be in shortly to prep you for surgery.”
Once he was gone I looked over at Morgan who was frozen. “Mo, it’s going to be fine.”
“It’s still surgery Samantha! Surgery always has a chance of something bad happening.”
“Wow, did you really just full first name me? I will be fine, and two days from now I will be watching you play hockey from the comfort of our bed while you kick ass on the ice. I’m gonna text my family quickly before I go back for surgery but I am going to need you to keep them up to date with what’s going on. I know they are going to want to fly out but hopefully I can convince them not to come.”
“Good luck with that.”
Morgan’s POV
I watched as Sam texted her family before the nurse came in to take her back for surgery. “I’ll see you once soon. I love you so much.”
“I love you too Mo.” I kissed her forehead and then her lips before they wheeled her bed away. Another nurse showed me to a waiting room where I would be out of the way and they would know where to find me. I was texting an update to Samantha’s family when someone bumped into my legs. It annoyed me when they just stood there then, not apologizing. I looked up and saw Fred and Auston standing there with coffee and a bag of food.
“What are you guys doing here?”
“Sam texted us and said you might need some company. So we brought coffee and snacks." They sit on either side of me, handing me a coffee before pulling out some sandwiches. “How long is the surgery supposed to take?”
“Hopefully an hour. Thank you guys for coming.”
“Of course, Sam’s family too.” Freddie says handing me a sandwich. Auston and Fred kept me distracted for the whole time as we waited for the doctor to come out. I started to get antsy when the hour mark passed. As we got closer to two hours I was pacing the waiting room. “Mo, sit down. I’m sure they will be out soon with news.” Freddie had to pull me back into my seat to stop me from pacing. Instead of pacing my leg was bouncing and Auston laughed at me.
“Sometimes surgery takes a while, if something went wrong I’m sure that someone would come out and update you.” I really wanted to believe my teammates, but I was still worried. Finally Samantha”s doctor came out and as soon as I spotted him I was up, out of my seat and moving towards him. 
“Did something go wrong?”
“No, things were a little worse than we expected so we weren’t able to do it laparoscopically. Besides that everything went perfect. She is in a recovery room now. I don’t think the change in procedure will extend her time she needs to stay here, it could take her a little longer to get back to 100 percent.”
“Okay.”
“A nurse can take you to her whenever you are ready, but unfortunately only one visitor can see her.” I thank him, shaking his hand before going to tell my friends what was going on.
“We’ll try to stop by tomorrow after practice if Sam is up to it.” I bid them goodbye before following the nurse back to where Sam was. Walking into the room, I wiped my sweaty hands on my sweatpants before going into the room. Sam was laying in the slightly inclined bed with her eyes closed, so I tried to be quiet as I pulled a chair up to her bed. Just as I was sitting down Sam looked at me smiling. 
“Hi.”
“Hi, how are you feeling?” That caused me to laugh, of course she was asking me how I was.
“Aren’t I supposed to ask you that, since you are the one who just came out of surgery?” That got a smile out of her as she reached for my hand. 
“I’m fine but I am also pretty sure that I have pain meds in me right now.” Sam stroked my cheek and smiled at me. “You worry about me, and the nurse mentioned that the surgery ran long so I know that you worried even more.”
“Well, Fred and Auston didn’t have to tie me down to the chair.”
“That’s good.” We talked for a bit before a nurse came in to check on Sam. When he left Sam turned to me. “Why don’t you sleep at home?”
“I’m sure they will be okay if I stay here with you overnight.”
“It’s not going to be comfortable for you. Please go home and sleep in our bed, I will still be here in the morning and your back will thank me for making sure you don’t hurt yourself.”
“Sam…”
“Please Mo. Do it for me. I am going to be asleep basically the whole time you are gone.”
“Fine, but I will be back in the morning as soon as visitor hours start.”
“I can’t wait.” Kissing Samantha goodbye, I left the hospital, wishing that I was back with her but knowing she was right.
***
“She is walking around with a nurse but they should be back in the room in a few minutes.” I thank the nurse and sit down in a chair and answer a few texts before I hear Sam and a nurse coming into the room. 
“Mo!”
“Hey Sam, how are you feeling?”
“A little stiff, but good. It felt really good to walk around the floor.” The nurse says a doctor will be in soon before leaving us, Sam coming to sit on my lap. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too, but you were right.”
“I’m sorry, can you repeat that?” I laugh, kissing her before lightly squeezing her side.
“You were right and I love you. I also brought you an iced coffee, I called the nurses desk and they talked to your doctor who gave the okay for the drink.”
“I love you too. And not just because you brought me coffee.” Hugging Sam as she drank her coffee and we chatted, waiting for the doctor, I was happy that this was just a bump in a road and even though I was super worried about the surgery, it all worked out.
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theycallmegothboy · 3 years
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1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!
FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  -spotify  2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess  3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey
4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers  14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size?  -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao   39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy
40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear?  -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)  -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao  49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car?  -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18.  54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job?  -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?  -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?  -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles?  -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?  -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods?  -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons?  -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce?  -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed?  -wouldnt you like to know? ;))  66. have you ever won a spelling bee?  -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw?  -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw?  -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?  -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you?  -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah  78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment  81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor?  -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos?  -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules.  84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier  85. what shirt are you wearing?  -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang  guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high?  -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk?  -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate?  -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter?  -fall. fuck you 96. day or night?  -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month?  -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of?  -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/
felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3
also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3
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mari-beau · 3 years
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PSA: IF YOU HAVE HAD COVID & SEEK MEDICAL FOLLOW-UP, KNOW YOUR PATIENT RIGHTS TO REFUSE UNNECESSARY TESTS
ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE SUBJUGATED TO THE AMERICAN HEALTH SYSTEM
IF YOU HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT YOUR COVID RECOVERY, DO SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION!! IT IS IMPORTANT. YOU COULD HAVE SERIOUS COMPLICATIONS.
BUT DESPITE ALL THE MOCKERY AND DERISION FROM THE MEDICAL FIELD, DO SOME RESEARCH YOURSELF (FROM LEGIT MEDICAL AND SCIENTIFIC INSTITUTION’S WEBSITES/SOURCES)
DOCTORS ARE JUST PEOPLE. AND A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE NOT THAT SMART. (AND YOUR DOCTOR IS NOT NECESSARILY SMARTER OR MORE CAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING THE VIROLOGY AND BIOLOGY OF YOUR SITUATION THAN YOU ARE). QUESTION THINGS. MAKE THEM EXPLAIN AND JUSTIFY THEIR ACTIONS.
MAKE THEM LISTEN TO YOU!
MY STORY HAS BEEN PLACED BELOW A BREAK
Because TRIGGER WARNING for people with Hospital/Medical PTSD
I tested positive for COVID-19 well over a month ago. I got moderately sick. I did not need to be hospitalized (thankfully). And was able to manage it with cold medicine. It was in my lungs. I had a high fever that cycled on and off for days, cough, shortness of breath, fatigue. By day 11, I was recovered enough and deemed no longer infectious by Public Health’s certified nurses (who know and understand COVID guidance/pathology).
It still took me awhile to completely bounce back. And surprise-surprise, my work is extremely stressful (I work for a local Public Health Department, the ones tasked with doing all of the non-direct patient care pandemic work, such as case investigations, quarantining, helping the public, inspections, answering every single question of every single member of the public). So it was taking me longer to be at normal levels of health. And I was noticing I’d be fine for days, but when I started to get a little worn down from work, I’d start coughing again.
My coworkers were concerned and had one of our nurses encourage me to seek follow-up in case I had a secondary infection as a result of my COVID infection, such as bronchitis or pneumonia. I tried calling the practice where my doctor used to be (living in rural area, the doctors maybe last a year before leaving), but the receptionist said they had no providers until following Monday (I was calling on a Wednesday). She was also baffled by my spiel:
“I tested positive for COVID-19 on November 24. I was cleared by Public Health on Dec. 4. I feel fine most of the time, but when I get tired, I start coughing again. I would like to be checked out to make sure I don’t have bronchitis or pneumonia or lung damage.”
I’m not so sure what’s so difficult about that. I had to prompt her... Should I call back on Monday then to see if I can get checked out? 
My coworker used to be practice manager for that group of practices. And she was like WTF? and called over to confirm that they had no provider covering the practice through the New Year’s weekend. 
But to be honest, it wouldn’t have mattered if I’d gotten through to them, because come to find out, the whole “Health Systems” conglomerate in our region funnels anyone who has had COVID to the Main Hospital ER. My mother’s doctor, who she asked to follow up because she is older and had concerns about complications, was likewise sent to the “COVID unit” in the hospital, despite the fact that she was no longer infectious and in recovery.
Anyway, the nurse at work encouraged me to get checked out that day. So I called the Urgent Care. Again, the receptionist was baffled by my spiel. As was the nurse she had speak to me. The nurse informed me I had to go to the main hospital.
Fine. I thought. I’d just get my lungs checked out and get it over with. If I had a secondary infection, they could give me a steroid inhaler or stronger cough medicine or something. 
WRONG!
I show up to the Hospital, they funnel you through precautions (which is great). I give my spiel to the receptionist, adding on how I tried my primary care and urgent care, and they told me I had to come here. They give me to intake person, who asks me the standard questions and checks my vitals.
My heartrate is high.
I have panic attacks in hospitals. I can’t even visit people in the hospital. It’s not a conscious issue. And it’s completely outside of my control. I can attempt to manage with anxiety coping mechanisms, but to be honest it doesn’t work. 
I inform the intake nurse/doctor/whoever that my stress levels have been high from work, specifically Monday I was in the call center getting verbally abused by our wonderful community members all day long. And that I have panic attacks in hospitals. And was likely in early stages of panic attack. He replied to me that was on Monday and it’s Wednesday (someone who had no clue how anxiety works). And I of course sounded perfectly calm then, because part of how I cope is trying to keep my shit together and not freak out.
They admit me for having a high heart rate. (BECUASE DOCTORS DON”T LISTEN, ESPECIALLY TO WOMEN).
SO, SUMMARY SO FAR: I HAVE BEEN ADMITTED TO THE HOSPITAL FOR HAVING PANIC ATTACKS IN THE HOSPITAL WHEN I JUST WANTED SOMEONE TO CHECK MY LUNGS.
They stick me in a negative pressure COVID room because I had COVID a month ago (and they don’t seem to understand I am no longer infectious, or how viruses work; yes, some people remain very sick and infectious longer; I meet all the criteria of no longer being infectious). 
I have to change into hospital gown, etc. Doctor checks my lungs. Everything sounds fine. My 02 stats are 100%. 
I SHOULD HAVE BEEN RELEASED AT THIS POINT. I SHOULD HAVE REFUSED ALL FURTHER PROCEDURES AND TESTS. BUT I HAVE HOSPITAL-INDUCED ANXIETY AND AM IN NO STATE OF MIND TO QUESTION ANYTHING BECAUSE I’M BARELY KEEPING MY SHIT TOGETHER. NO WONDER I’M FUCKING TACHYCARDIC.
Next up is the nurses, come to hook me up to the heart monitor and EKG. 
AND DO THE ONE OTHER THING THAT CAN SEND ME INTO A FULL ANXIETY ATTACK. 
They ignore me when I tell them they need to use a pediatric needle on my veins. All of my mom’s family has small, hard to find, fragile veins. THEY BLOW OUT TWO OF MY VEINS IN ONE ARM WHILE A LAB PERSON IS TRYING TO DRAW BLOOD OUT OF MY OTHER ARM. 
I AM FINE WITH VACCINES/SHOTS. AND IF THEY CAN GET A NEEDLE IN AND DRAW BLOOD QUICK, I CAN KEEP MY SHIT TOGETHER. I HAVE NO CONSCIOUS FEAR OF NEEDLES OR BLOOD. BUT IF THEY MESS AROUND WITH MY ARMS TOO LONG, IT SENDS ME INTO FULL HYPERVENTILATING, CRYING HYSTERICALLY, LEG THRASHING PANIC ATTACK.
ALL THE WHILE, I’M APOLOGIZING TO THEM. AND HATING MYSELF FOR MY REACTION. 
The nurse keeps trying to comfort me as she blows out another vein in my arm for an IV I DID NOT NEED. I keep saying “I’m sorry. It’s stupid. It’s so stupid I get like this.” As I’m sobbing and hyperventilating. 
The nurse gives up after blowing out several veins in my arm when doing the saline wash. (This does not pardon me, but only buys me a reprieve). 
Lab Guy exits with some blood he managed to get out of one of my arms. 
I have been repeatedly questioned by doctors and nurses so far about having had another COVID test. I tell them no, since I can test positive for up to 3 months afterwards, it’s quite literally pointless.
THEY GIVE ME ANOTHER COVID TEST. 
My first one when I was actually sick, was just mildly uncomfortable. THIS TIME THEY MANAGE TO GIVE A PRETTY SPECTACTULAR BLOODY NOSE. AND PROMPTLY LEAVE THE ROOM AS I CALL ‘MY NOSE IS BLEEDING’ AFTER THEM. 
I HAVE TO USE THE MASK I WORE IN TO TRY TO STAUNCH THE NOSEBLEED. 
I THINK IT WAS HERE I HAD MY FULL ON PANIC ATTACK. IF YOU HAVE THEM, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN BY FULL-ON. I WAS ALONE. (WHICH I PREFER BECAUSE THEY EMBARRASS ME).
A different nurse finally comes back for some other reason (I don’t remember now). I ask her from some tissues. She hands me some paper towels. She leaves. She returns, gives me a washcloth to clean all the blood off my face and neck. Another nurse is with her. 
ROUND TWO OF DRAWING BLOOD & IV ATTEMPT
These ones do better. But I am calmer having just had the full-on panic attack. They have to use veins in my biceps to draw the blood. And finally get an IV in. (Mind you, it’s an IV I really didn’t need). They give me a bag of fluids and some anti-anxiety/sedative to try to bring my heart rate down (letting me go home would’ve worked far better).
They’ve already done the EKG. They put me through a CT scan and echocardiogram. And finally a chest x-ray (which would’ve been in the more necessary scope of treatment/evaluation for my complaint/concern about residual lung damage).
There’s a good wait time in between these.
I was already hydrated. I drink a lot of water. And so I had to pee very badly. 
Because, guess what the COVID test came back positive and they’ve stuck the official notice on the negative pressure COVID room door,  I have to use the little commode chair thing in the room. The nurse puts a little bedpan/measuring catch thingy in it. She takes some of my urine to test (so yet another unnecessary test). 
They give me another bag of fluids. Which makes me have to pee very badly again. I try to call a nurse. My bladder’s about explode. But I’m hooked up to machines and not sure if I’m allowed to leave the hospital bed. She glances in at me. Tells me it’s okay to go. 
I fill up the little bedpan. 
I will have to pee very badly again by the end of this ordeal, and have more than half a mind to go pee/overflow the bedpan into the rest of the ‘commode’.
But finally whatever doctor assigned to me comes back, says everything is fine and I can be released.
Mind you, my heartrate has remained low 100s for hours and hours (a little high for me, but I was in a fucking hospital and having panic attacks and my anxiety was still quite high).
I wait another half an hour for a nurse to come and disconnect me from everything and do a ‘verbal’ discharge. 
SO MANY TIMES I HAD WANTED TO YANK EVERYTHING OFF ME AND LEAVE. I NOW WISH I HAD DONE PRECISELY THAT.
My parents showed up and were waiting for me in the parking lot to drive me home and drive my truck home. My mom said it looked like I had been through a war. She’d never seen me look so terrible.
I went into work that morning feeling worn down from work. And I was coughing a little. I came out of the hospital 8 hours later feeling the worst I have in my life. Worse than when I was feverish and struggling to breath from COVID infection.
The public health nurses at my workplace advised me to file a complaint against the hospital. They agreed/informed me that what the hospital did was medically unnecessary.
I HAVE BRUISES ALL UP AND DOWN MY ARMS. I HAVE BURST CAPILLARIES UNDER MY EYES AND ACROSS MY CHEEKS FROM CRYING SO HARD. I HAVE WOKEN UP EVERY MORNING SINCE WITH A TIGHT KNOT OF ANXIETY IN MY CHEST. MY HEART RATE (WHICH I CHECK WITH A PULSE OXIMETER) HAS NOT RETURNED TO ITS NORMAL LOWER LEVELS. IT HAS BEEN FIVE DAYS.
SUMMARY:
 I HAD COVID AND RECOVERD. I WAS CONCERNED ABOUT POSSIBLE COMPLICATIONS SUCH AS BRONCHITIS, PNEUMONIA OR LUNG DAMAGE BECAUSE I HAVE A RECCURRING SLIGHT COUGH. 
NO HEALTH CARE PROVIDERS UNDER THE CONGLOMERATE THAT IS OUR ONLY CHOICE OF MEDICAL CARE IN OUR REGION WILL SEE ANYONE WHO HAS HAD COVID. THEY SEND THEM ALL DIRECTLY TO THE MAIN HOSPITAL ER COVID UNIT TO DO A SLEW OF UNNECESSARY TESTS AND RACK UP THE HOPISTAL BILL. 
I WENT TO GET A SLIGHT COUGH CHECKED OUT. INSTEAD I WAS SUBJECTED TO UNNECESSARY TESTS AND TREATMENT JUST TO BE TOLD I AM IN FACT PERFECTLY FINE. AND NOW I HAVE TEXTBOOK PTSD. 
FUCK YOU, AMERICAN HEALTH CARE SYSTEM.
**EXTRA REMINDER TO SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION AND FOLLOW-UP IF YOU HAVE HAD COVID AND ARE CONCERNED. JUST REMEMBER YOU HAVE RIGHTS AND OUR HEALTH CARE SYSTEM’S MAIN FOCUS IS MAKING MONEY**
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youdidwelljonghyun · 4 years
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I haven’t been using this app much since I joined stan twit but I need to speak on this bc it’s important:
NCT, Exo, Taemin and SM Entertainment on a whole are a fucking disappointment. BLM has been the number one topic on social media across the world for about a week now. I’ve seen countless Korean artistes speak up in support. I’ve seen artistes post their donations. I’ve seen BM go on insta live and discuss his experiences with cops and how black people have to live in fear despite being innocent. I’ve seen Crush talk about how Korean pop music is built on black culture & there would be no Kpop, kr&b or khiphop without black culture. Ive seen Got7’s mark donate $7000 to the cause. I’ve seen a 2 month old rookie group’s member get all her socials deleted because she had the balls and the decency to support BLM on her platform. I’ve seen KBS in America covering the riots. I’ve seen Korean civilans speak up about BLM, supporting and explaining the situation in both Korean and English, I’ve seen Yeri post in support on her Instagram.
AND YET. NCTzens had to BEG, and when I say B E G. We were flooding 127’s twitter mentions, lysn and Instagram BEGGiNG them to post in support of BLM, just so they could use their platform to influence followers to support. For DAYS. We had to beg these men who: 3 of them lived in the US for extended periods, one is FROM CHICAGO where much of the rioting is taking place. They are ALWAYS talking about how they’re a global group. 127 has toured across the US multiple times. They regularly interact with international fans. Their intl fanbase has likely made them more revenue than their Korean fanbase. In fact, I’d argue that 127’s current level of popularity is mostly due to their American fans, & I’m not even American. Just last week we rallied together for DAYS to defend Jaehyun from those disgusting Kfans. Yet they only responded after over 24 hours of begging them, and when they did, ONE member posted something without even including a donation link or saying anything truly substantial... the member that is literally American. His post was basically a “fine, here it is since you won’t stop bugging me about this!”. I saw many fans begging them to “open their purses” and show how much they donated, which I don’t think is necessary— but at LEAST POST A GODDAMN DONATION LINK. Do you know how many fans would mirror your actions? Even with the lame post Johnny made, countless fans were asking where they can donate. Do you SEE HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO USE YOUR PLATFORM?? Then Ten posted that random black square. No caption, no nothing. Anyone who doesn’t know about BLM won’t know what the fuck it’s for. I saw comments asking what it was about and making jokes. I am so fucking disappointed in these men for doing the bare minimum when they have a massive platform, they have received support from thousands of black fans and they make a huge chunk of their money off of American tours, NOT TO MENTION black music is the blueprint for Kpop. They always talk about what black artiste’s music they love, but they are damn near fucking silent about the innocent black people being murdered worldwide.
Exo is a fucking joke. Kai, Chanyeol Baekhyun and Sehun regularly post on their socials— kai did a live a few days ago, Chanyeol has posted several NNG videos, Baek has been doing lives/menpas and yet neither of them can be assed to say oh, btw black lives matter and here’s a donation link so u can help support too. Lay has also been promoting constantly, he’s had a comeback and dropped an MV a few days ago, and yet???
They may have very well donated in private— I acknowledge that. But they could do SO MUCH for the black community by simply making a post in support with a donation link, that would cost them literally nothing. So why haven’t they done so?? They must not care enough to— because trust me, fans have been asking. Exo and NCT’s lysn board have been spammed with fans begging for support, giving them donation links to share and explaining the situation. I feel a little entitled, demanding anything from someone I don’t personally know, but then I realize that it would take almost no effort on their part, and that they would be giving back to the very community that allowed kpop’s very existence, not to mention supporting their millions of black fans around the world. I see many people saying that this is an “American issue” and “no one asks celebrities to donate when other people are suffering”. If you think that is an excuse then you are a part of the problem. 1. Black people exist all over the world, they are discriminated against and brutalized worldwide. 2. I have seen Americans lobbying and pushing for global causes countless times on social media. Just the other day American Kpop fans helped trend the Nth room case, translating articles and spreading awareness. I was one of those fans.
As for SM Entertainment, the company that likely employs more black producers than any other in Korea, they have 100% ignored the BLM movement on ALL platforms; they have done NOTHING. Monsta X, Ateez and BTS have all officially posted on their group accounts that they stand with BLM and they support the cause, yet SM cannot be assed to do a goddamn thing except exploit black culture and use Americans as ATM machines. I heard they were sending TEXTS to American fans about a COMEBACK (or something??) in the midst of all the rioting. The funny thing is, it’s a pattern— SM never gives a flying fuck about American fans. All they do is coddle kfans and indulge in their delusional fantasies, making Jaehyun write a fucking apology letter for eating some food because kfans threw a tantrum and placating kfans when they got salty about Superhuman promotions. WHERE EVEN IS SUPER M??? THE GROUP THAT LITERALLT DEBUTED IN THE US LMFAOOOOO. LITERAL SILENCE.
I just made this post to say that I, as a black fan, can’t continue to go out on a limb for, to stan, to defend and trend hashtags for, to leave encouraging lysn messages for, artistes who don’t give enough of a fuck that my people are dying to make a genuinely supportive post with a donation link. That is THE BARE MINIMUM. We aren’t asking them to go out on the streets and protest. I cannot do it anymore. As a black fan, there have always been things we have to speak out about more than any other fan group, there have always been things we’ve had to overlook. But I’m fucking done with this shit. I’m done streaming and voting and watching their videos. They don’t deserve my support one bit. I see their pictures on my timeline and I just feel empty— I mean, they really don’t give a fuck about us at all. Lots of times we’ve reconciled with the fact that Korea as a whole is pretty racist towards black people, but we think the best of our favs and assume that because they have so many black fans they must feel differently and have more of an open mind— HA. And I was never the fan who expected that idols love us as much as we love them, but for you to sit there and profit from our culture and our support, but be unable to open your mouths or make a single Instagram post when we’re being killed...
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sailorshadzter · 5 years
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alright so here’s going to be my thoughts / breakdown of the new trailer. im actually really excited to do this because ive not done a game of thrones trailer before!! 
so i hope you guys enjoy.
also, shoutout to everyone who has taken the time to gif this trailer, i hope no one minds me using their gifs (with the proper credit of course!) 
anyways, under the cut for SPOILERS and length :)
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we immediately cut to arya running off, her breathing heavy, she even makes a frightened sound as she takes off. we watch her run, looking over her shoulder, true fear in her eyes and on her face. but i dont think this is fear for herself. i can only assume that these opening seconds are post battle with the ww/nk because she’s covered in blood (also WHO’S blood?) and sweat. something or someone (jon  👀) has sent arya back to winterfell and we all know what the reason is: sansa fucking stark. 
something has struck fear into jon or arya for their beloved sister/cousin and arya is 100% going after sansa. because she looks over her shoulder, i imagine she’s running away from whatever has come for sansa- she’s leading it away, perhaps in hopes that it will give chase to her and give sansa a chance to escape. maybe not, maybe the look over her shoulder is at someone else chasing after her to rescue sansa (jon? the hound? brienne?). either way... this is true fear we see on arya’s face. she’s terrified that something has happened to sansa. 
worse yet... what if she’s running from someone who she loves that’s been turned into a white walker? i hate the thought of that but wow that could be something else, huh. 
what i find really interesting throughout this scene (besides arya’s voice over) is the three bell tolls. they say death comes in threes. the three bell tolls could signify the deaths of the characters we see as they chime (davos, varys, and arya herself / whoever she’s speaking to). i will literally lose my mind if davos dies, i cant even THINK about that. but, its definitely a very real possibility as we move into this final battle. 
arya’s voice over is chilling... i know death... it’s got many faces... i look forward to seeing this one. What i LOVE about this is its all voice over until that final line. she’s saying that to someone on her list. she’s clean in that moment, meaning its before or after the opening moments. my guess is its after and she’s speaking to cersei. cersei has been on her list from the beginning and it’s absolutely without a doubt that arya will rush off to king’s landing to rescue sansa. if cersei doesnt die in childbirth like i think (we’ll talk about that later) it would be arya to get the kill. and i know, the old witch told cersei it would be her brother that killed her... but let’s talk about that for a second
it’s going to be tyrion. he’s going to get them into king’s landing without cersei knowing and he’s going to be the reason they’re able to take cersei out. so really, he’s her undoing. he causes her death. this also feeds into my thought that tyrion won’t stay loyal to dany. if dany lives past the fight with the night king, something tells me she wont want to rush into king’s landing just to rescue sansa. she wont view her as important any longer and wont want to risk harm to herself or her dragons by immediately leaving one fight for the other. not for sansa stark. that will be tyrions breaking point. 
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these are a few of the shots we get while bran’s voice over plays. everything that you did brought you to where you are now... where you belong. home.  we also see king’s landing & sam looking over his shoulder with bran in the background. the moment bran says home we’re hit with a shot of dany’s army marching towards winter fell, of course with jon and dany on horseback coming up at the rear? the middle? im not sure but i also dont think it matters much.
i think its obvious this is bran speaking to jon. he’s reminding him that despite this reveal of who his parents really were... he’s still a stark. he’s still home there at winterfell, in the north. he’s still got a family. everything jon has done up until this point has been for the north or for sansa. he went to war with the boltons to take winterfell back, to avenge what happened to sansa, to protect what family he had left. 
next is cersei, she’s clearly overlooking a ship coming into the harbor or someone riding up on horseback / in a wagon. i wont lie, im not versed enough in the ins and outs of king’s landing to know, or if you can even travel from winterfell to king’s landing... but i would assume there’s a way considering the golden company is most likely sailing there from king’s landing???
anyways
i think cersei is watching sansa being brought to her. she’s smirking because she think she’s won. she thinks she’s going to be the queen on the throne in the end of this fight. she’s untouchable. she’s pregnant with the future heir to the iron throne and she has who she believes to be her son’s murderer almost in her grasp. not just that- this is sansa stark, the key to the north. her “brother” is king in the north (well kind of) and now she has leverage against him. her life for something. i cant imagine word of jon’s parentage would have traveled to cersei yet (although... who knows) so she cant use sansa as leverage for jon to give up his claim to the throne. maybe sansa for dany? give up the dragon queen and ill give you back your sister, type thing. im not sure. i truly believe at this point, cersei still hasnt let go her belief that sansa helped poison joffrey & i think that’s the biggest motive for her here. everything else is just gravy. especially if she DOES learn the truth about jon while she’s in her keep. 
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yeah so here we have dany and jon riding into winterfell, looking very much like a king / queen riding into battle. i dont have much to say about this moment other than they both look very stoic, not that is surprising for jon. dany seems to be just ahead of him, as if to remind everyone she’s the queen. i do like the contrast of her white outfit compared to the darkness of the dothraki and jon. but those blood red gloves? girl. talk about having blood on your hands.
now this is the part im LIVING FOR
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MY GIRL HOLY SHIT.
the shot continues with sansa taking a few steps towards the other side of the walkway, her eyes never leaving the dragons. first of all, can we talk about how all the men in got have reacted to the dragons? THEY COWERED. THEY RAN. THEY FLUNG THEMSELVES ONTO THE GROUND. jon literally threw himself on the ground out of fear and shock. but not this girl. not my stark sisters. they literally show no fear as the dragons fly overhead. 
sansa is wearing the same gown here as she is when she meets with jon and dany. i definitely think this is her watching the arrival of the army and dany. the dragons arent hard to miss and im sure someone alerted her of them being sighted. she’s up there watching their arrival, knowing any moment jon would be back in winterfell where he belonged.
im sure she’s thinking about hundreds of things. how am i to feed all these people without the north starving? how are the dragons to feed without starving us all? why has jon brought her back with him? why do they ride side by side like husband and wife?  part of me wants to believe that this is all planned out ahead of time, but i know it isnt. if jon wants this political agenda to go through the right way he has to make every last detail seem believable. he knows sansa cant lie for shit (bless her heart) and if he doesnt make even her believe he’s with dany, then this whole thing will fall apart. 
he’s doing this for her, after all.
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next we see jon already in the crypts and daenerys coming to join him. we have jon’s voice over as she walks they’re coming, our enemy doesn’t tire.   what’s interesting to me is the placement of jon’s words over this particular scene. it pans in to dany looking upset as she approaches jon (who looks downright miserable) as if she means to console him. it’s here that jon says the enemy never tires. are we to take this literally as dany is the enemy? its a trailer so its hard to say. we can only infer things at this point. i definitely believe dark!dany is coming whether this trailer did this or not, so i cant really use it as proof of anything. 
i just find it odd that jon is NEVER smiling or happy (it seems) when he’s with dany. now this post isnt about a ship war (but if you follow me, you already know where i stand) but i find it odd that for the couple we’re supposed to think is end game... they never seem happy. if jon’s in love with dany, why doesnt he show it? in his past relationships we see him smile and laugh. yes, i know, jon is definitely the brooding type but we KNOW he can smile, we’ve seen it before with sansa & ygritte. so why not with dany? that alone is proof enough for me that jon and dany are NEVER going to end up together. 
anyways moving on before the stans come for me  👀
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doesnt stop, doesnt feel... Jon’s voice over continues as we flash to Gendy (looking like a whole ass snack, hello) Jorah riding into battle, and Grey Worm with Missandei sharing a kiss. also i think its important that we’re shown them kissing as jon says dont feel, implying that only the living can of course feel, while the night king feels absolutely nothing at all. their kiss is a reminder that happiness can be found even in the darkest of moments (thanks for the quote, albus) and its bittersweet too because this very well could be the last time they see each other. 
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(credit to @vavaharrison for this gif as well) 
we cut then to a battle scene with brienne and jaime. i love the background of this scene- all fire and ash, brienne slicing through a white walker (i hope lol) as intense as ever. it cuts to jaime shouting for bronn which has me SHOOK because does that mean something has happened to bronn? is jaime trying to get his attention BEFORE something happens? just needs his attention so he can send him elsewhere on the battlefield? its hard to say. 
looking very closely, jaime is wearing northern armor here, the same set he was wearing in the one set of hbo stills. there’s been a lot of speculation that it’s robb’s armor he’s wearing and i love that idea. 
the scene switches immediately after this and we get something INSANE and AMAZING all at the same time.
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without a doubt, that’s sansa there in king’s landing, standing before cersei. i think its safe to assume the person next to her is the commander of the golden company, the uniform he’s wearing is pretty spot on, at least from the distance of the shot. 
obviously they did this for a reason. they dont want us to be 100% but we know. but you cant miss sansa’s frame or the way she styles her hair. even in such a small, far off shot you can tell it’s sansa standing there. you can even just barely make our her fur wrap around her shoulders, the black cloak she wears a dark contrast to the room. 
now, i touched on this earlier... the kidnapping plot. 
i’ve been a big believer in this since i first heard of it. it makes sense, it falls perfectly into the plot.. it works. i wont repeat myself (much) from what i said earlier, but sansa has been brought here because she’s the key to the north & the whole joffrey getting poisoned at his own wedding. cersei blamed tyrion and by default sansa too... because besides sansa, who else could want him dead THAT MUCH? i mean to us, the answer is a LOT of people, but to cersei... sansa is the only answer. she was mistreated by joffrey from the start and he had cut of her father’s head right before her very eyes. of course sansa would want him dead. 
and its so easy to blame her. poor little sansa stark. she’s jealous of sansa, i’ve always thought so. a beautiful girl, well loved by her family and everyone around her. even at king’s landing people were drawn to her. she was a shining example of what a lady was supposed to be, untainted by the darkness like cersei. she was pure, like myrcella was. she would grow to have a nice life eventually, even if it meant she remained married to tyrion. and her own son, evil as he was, he was still hers, he would grow cold in the dirt. cersei needed someone to lash out at, someone to blame. and there was no one better than sansa stark. 
the shot of the hall is followed by that one of cersei, looking teary-eyed and drinking wine.  we already knew she was pregnant (or was she? now im not sure what to think!!) and avoided the wine when talking with tyrion. but here she’s drinking again. we know how much cersei loves her wine. i suppose its safe to assume there’s no more pregnancy, there’s to be no heir to follow after her for the iron throne. and now that jaime is gone from her... there’s no one left in this world that she loves or loves her. that child was her one last chance to start over, to be a good mother, and rule the seven kingdoms. now its all gone. its like she’s asking herself here what’s the point now? why continue? she’s wearing what looks to be a dressing robe, so i can only assume this is after she’s been cleaned up from her miscarriage. maybe she’s even brought sansa in and is talking with her, a call back to the conversations they used to have in the earlier seasons. 
i think we’ll get a lot of drama from this- everyone is going to witness jon losing his mind over sansa’s kidnapping. blaming himself, arya blaming herself, and probably brienne too. let me tell you... i live for that. i think this will be the moment where people realize just how deeply jon feels for her. this will be where the political plot unravels. 
*cue the dramatic music*
we get a shot of the dragons, a repeat of arya seeing the dragons, grey worm putting his helmet on, and an amazing shot of jon in the godswood (which ill talk about below) all while jaime has a voice over i promised to fight for the living... i intend to keep that promise! just like with arya, it starts out as a voice over, but the last line is him actually saying the line to whomever he’s speaking to. i believe this is part of his speech as he pledges himself to sansa / house stark. 
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ive read a few posts about this moment- some speculating that there’s someone sitting there that we can’t see, others saying we’re seeing this in the POV of someone walking towards jon. im more inclined to believe the latter. its almost like jon’s waiting there for someone. i think we’d still get a glimpse of skirts if it was sansa or silver hair over his shoulder if it was dany. i guess you could argue it could be arya who’s so small he would obscure her or bran even, but again, i think its most likely this is the pov of someone walking towards jon.
but who?
i think its sansa. my little shipper heart would LOVE to believe this is a secret wedding or the moment they’ll confess their feelings, but its a long shot i know. anyways. if its not sansa... then i dont know. at this point, im assuming this is after jon’s parentage reveal. he’s struggling with who he is. all along he’s wanted to be a stark, not just the stark bastard. now he’s a targaryen? who’s the one person who told him he was a stark when no one else would? Sansa. im not a stark, you are to me. jon doesnt have the stark name, but i do. together, they are house stark. if he married her, he could claim the name he always wanted. it would be an amazing call back to ned & cat under the godswood back in season 1 if we had jon and sansa here as well.
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all i can think about when i see these scenes are something i mentioned above: how are the dragons going to feed without putting the whole north into starvation? originally id been worried about the army dany was bringing with her but this... this is the real problem. look at all the bones jon and dany have to cross to get to her dragons. how much livestock and wild animals have died to feed these things? how many more innocent children / people have been killed already in wintertown? that livestock / animals could be feeding the people, but they arent. 
this leads me to this next moment
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wow my girl looks so sad here :(
im having a LOT of mixed feelings about what’s got sansa so down. she’s in a new dress entirely (note the neckline) so im not sure where to place this in the timeline of everything. i could refer this moment to SO MANY THINGS. is she watching jon and dany? a new thought that has come to me is... have the dragons burned someone? is this her reacting to someone crying over a dead child / loved one? im having a lot of flash backs to how dany looked when the father brought her his daughter’s charred corpse. 
her lips are parting like she means to say something but cant find her voice. she’s standing in winterfell’s courtyard, so who else is around her? we’re not privy to anyone in the background or before her, so again, we can only infer from what the trailer is giving us. 
is she watching jon and dany as they walk away to visit the dragons? have she and jon just argued? is she watching HIM walk away to brood in the godswood, feeling down himself after learning who his parents were? it could literally be anything that’s making her look this sad. im leaning towards it being jon related, but wow if it were something to do with the dragons burning someone... wow. 
i feel like this is where im going to end.
the rest of the trailer are quick glimpses of scenes and faces. arya fighting with the same background as brienne, tyrion looking hella depressed, drogon hitting us with a fire blast, the dothraki & brienne/jaime/ ect in line to fight, and of course the epic moment where we see the first glimpse of a white walker.
overall, this trailer was great. 
it gave us just enough without being TOO much. i thought id be let down once we did get a trailer only because we’ve been waiting so long!! but it’s amped me up and got me even more excited for the season to come!!
if you’ve made it this far... thanks for reading! lets chat about all things game of thrones! my ask box is always open~! :)
49 notes · View notes
ve1vetyoongi · 5 years
Text
remember me | kth - 02
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chapters: I, II, III, IV, V
pairing: taehyung x reader
rated: mature - contains smut.
genre: idol!au, baker!tae, french!reader, angst, romance, fluff, smut.
summary: Taehyung wants to be forgotten. Overwhelmed by his life as idol persona V, he longs to just be Kim Taehyung for once. Even if that means forgetting everything he ever knew.
word count: 6.1k
warnings: (fluffy) smut, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, mentions of blood, strong language, memory loss.
a/n: here is the second chapter of Remember Me! A big thank you to everyone who said kind things about the last installment and for getting chapter 1 to nearly 100 notes! It means so much to me that anyone read my work let alone 100 people haha. I hope you enjoy this part just as much!
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Getting a job at your father’s bakery was easier said than done. Workers had come and gone over the years, some citing conflicting schedules as their reason for resigning and others blatantly blaming your father’s strict approach to enforcement when it came to his employees. You couldn’t blame him for being that way, really. After all, the business had been in the family for years, the pastries a sweet testament to your grandparents and their grandparents before that. Belle Epoque had a reputation for being one of the best patisseries for miles - admittedly not hard in a small town like this, but an accomplishment none the less - so it was unsurprising that your father took great pride in ensuring everything was at it’s best, including the employees. Come to think of it, you were the only worker who wasn’t fired after a few months on the job, probably because the only thing above the bakery in importance to your father was his family.
“Papa!” You had announced upon entering Belle Époque’s swing doors, surprising a couple eating breakfast at one of the high seats overlooking the harbor through the tall glass windows. Your father was behind the counter, arranging the freshly baked breads of all shapes, sizes and varieties on a wire rack behind him. A line was already forming to buy the warm loaves, the smell comforting and delicious. Your sudden arrival drew your father away from his ministrations, wiping flour from his palms onto the sides of his black uniform as he spun in search of you. His eyes met yours immediately, worry filled as he looked you up and down once, then twice to check for any obvious bodily harm.
“What is wrong, mon amour?” He questioned, anxiety evident in his voice. An elderly man in line for your famous croissants tutted when your father pushed away the five euro bill he held out in payment in favor of slipping beneath the counter to pull your chin into his hands. He smelled like gooey danishes and apple turnovers and you breathed in the scent gladly, a feeling of home washing over you.
“Nothing, I have good news!” You pulled on his wrists, loosening his grip on your face. He cocked his head to the side, wrinkling his nose in relief when he realized you were not in any immediate danger. “I found you a new worker!”
A large poster was taped to the glass doors, labelled HELP WANTED, advertising the shortness of staff at the bakery. You had put it up yourself weeks ago and still nobody had come in to query about the position, probably put off by the stories of your fathers harshness when it came to cleaning the kitchens or baking the perfect pastries. It was becoming urgent - you were overworked, trying to balance your kitchen duties with stock responsibilities and working the counter so you were pretty sure your father would accept anybody who was brave enough to apply.
“Eh? I thought nobody around here wanted the job?”
“They don’t.” You say with a roll of the eyes, referencing the many conversations you had had regarding his unforgiving attitude. “He isn’t from here.”
His eyebrow cocked uncertainly. “You trust someone you don’t know to work here?”
“Papa, I do know him.” Although you had only met a few days ago your time with Taehyung felt like a lifetime. “I promise you can trust him.”
“I don’t know about this.”
“Please, Papa! He is hard working, I wouldn’t come to you if I didn’t believe it myself.” Your father’s face was still stony and unimpressed, quizzically considering your proposition. “S'il vous plaît?”
Your pleading cracked his resolve. You could tell by the way he softened, palms squeezing your shoulders gently as he clicked his tongue in disappointment at his own inability to say no. “Fine. But he’s on stock duty for now - keep him away from my kitchen, you hear me? - Leon will be here with this weeks stock in twenty minutes.”
Practically jumping with glee, you rip the poster from the window and triumphantly toss it into the trash. “I won’t disappoint you, Papa! He won’t disappoint you.”
“Just bring him in.” He tuts, waving you away as he moved his attention to the grumpy queue of impatient customers. “Twenty minutes!”
His reminder sent you into action, grabbing two aprons from the hook and rushing out into the street, scanning side to side until you finally laid eyes on Taehyung. He stood with his back pressed to the brick wall of the bakery, toe of his boot kicking stones into the middle of the cobbled road. He seemed nervous, eyes trained to the ground as he mumbled various greetings under his breath, apparently preparing for an introduction to your father. He snapped out of it quickly once the slam of the door gave away your presence, granting you a smile as you approached.
“How did it go?” His cane clicked as he closed the distance between you.
“You start work in twenty minutes,” You throw one of the white aprons you clutched in your hands, smirking as he fumbled to catch the flimsy fabric. “Get to work, kid.”
“You’re kidding?” He exclaimed, eyes as wide as his open mouth as he watched you fasten your own apron around your waist. A small nod was all it took for him to explode, discarding his cane all together as he scooped you up at the waist, bouncing up and down excitedly. The loss of gravity was unexpected, causing a squeal to escape your lips against his neck as he whispered a repetitive mantra of thank you’s into your hair.
The moment was cut short by a searing pain in Taehyung’s thigh, causing him to stagger backwards under your weight and reminding him of his still weakened state of health. Your feet touched the ground again as he grasped the cane, attempting to cover the heave of his chest with a smile.
“No need for thank you’s, just don’t make me regret this.” You mumbled in response.
Taehyung’s grin widened as he fumbled to tie his own apron around his waist. Noticing his struggle you slipped behind him to tie the strings into a knot yourself.
Once his apron was secure, he turned to face you again, pulling your face into his palms. “I promise, you won’t!”
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As it turned out, it was Taehyung who regretted accepting the job.
August’s peak had arrived, bringing with it the hottest summer the town had experienced in years. Your father had meant it when he said Taehyung was to stay far away from the kitchen - and the air conditioning as a result - instead ordering him to do all the literal heavy lifting he was apparently too old (or self righteous, Taehyung considered) to do himself. Leon, the bakeries supplier, came twice a week, bringing with him crates of flour and obscene amounts of chocolate chips and apple slices for Taehyung to unload and keep track of in a leather bound note book. He had voiced the idea of perhaps getting a laptop or tablet to make the job more efficient, only to be shut down with a harsh no from your father. He preferred to do things traditionally, he said.
Leon arrived late, setting Taehyung behind on his schedule by fifteen minutes he could not afford to waste; after all, he was already slower on his feet due to his wounded thigh. Taehyung watched with a sigh as Leon disappeared into the distance on his bicycle, pulling an empty cart back to the market. The stock seemed to be larger in quantity that day and sweat laced Taehyung’s furrowed brow before he had even attempted to begin shifting it bit by bit into the stock room.
Though, the hot stare of your father watching as he scratched his head in thought did not help his predicament. Taehyung’s back was to the door of the kitchen but he knew he was there, keeping a careful eye over him as he worked. He was still an outsider in this town, his employment at the bakery quickly becoming a topic of gossip among the people and apparently fueling your fathers inherent distrust of him. So far, Taehyung had proved himself as a good worker albeit a slow one, so your fathers reasons for continuing to stand with his arms crossed across his chest like a lion protecting its cubs was beyond him.
“You just gonna stand there, kid?” His sharp voice rang out, drawing Taehyung from his inner debate with a jolt. As if reading his mind, he added: “Start with the flour, y/n’s running short.”
Taehyung swallowed loudly, nervous under the scrutinizing presence. He had discarded his cane a week or two ago, able to limp where he desired now. It was progress, he figured. The black boots he had borrowed dragged across the cobbles as he approached the stack of flour sacks that almost towered over him in height.
They were heavy, he knew that from experience and he was practically winded just by lifting the sack at the top of the pile. The veins in Taehyung’s neck bulged as he struggled to keep his balance under the hefty weight. He felt his biceps begin to ache, opting to press a knee to the underside of the flour in an attempt to distribute the mass only to find himself balancing on his weakened leg, a sharp pain shooting through his thigh. The pain was sudden, eliciting an agonizing gasp and causing his grip on the sack to loosen substantially. Before he knew it he was stumbling forward, letting go of the flour all together in favor of breaking his fall with his hands. There was nothing he could do at that point, watching with wide eyes as the sack hit the ground, splitting and spilling onto the concrete beneath before he landed a top of it himself in a cloud of white.
The powder stung his eyes and tickled his throat, coughs wracking his frame as the flour irritated his lungs. Taehyung staggered to his knees, ignoring the way his thigh still protested, attempting to scoop the flour back into the sack to no avail. He sank back against his heels, finally accepting there was nothing he could do to salvage the ingredients, dragging his palms down his face in defeat.
A click of the tongue sounded behind him and Taehyung’s neck snapped towards the source, eyes immediately meeting your fathers own disappointed irises. His head shook side to side as he took in the sight before him. Taehyung noticed the way his jaw tightened in dismay, probably calculating the exact amount of money he would be removing from his paycheck before he simply disappeared back into the kitchen without a word.
His silence was enough.
“Fuck!” Taehyung exclaimed, slamming his closed fist into the belly of the now half empty sack of flour repeatedly. He had really done it this time. If he was on thin ice before he was in cold water now, pretty confident that his time working at Belle Epoque was over. He had tried so desperately to prove himself to the big man himself, your father, only to fuck everything up over a sack of flour. Why didn’t he take the candied fruit first? Why did his leg have to take so long to heal?
“Why did I take this job in the first place?” He muttered under his breath to nobody but himself. “I should have been a fucking fisherman.”
Deep down, he knew the answer to the question. The reason he didn’t want to become a fisherman or a sailor or even a bar tender was all down to one thing, one person.
You.
The entire reason he was here was because of the little glimpses he caught of you when he passed the kitchen window. Or when you rushed into the stock room in search of chopped almonds, hair tied back messily but still sparing him a smile and a few words through the stock room shelves before your father returned and caught you slacking. The only reason he was afraid of your father and his ability to fire him was because he couldn’t stand to sit at home, surrounded by you in your own apartment without you in it.
His heart ached at the thought and he realized that seeing you right now was exactly what he needed to calm the anger at his own weakness. Stock still surrounded him, ready to be accounted for and time still ticked away but he figured since his time here was limited he might as well break a couple of rules, right?
His hands left white prints on the back pockets of his slightly over sized jeans as he got to his feet, brushing powder from his shirt as he crept past the window before sidling up to the back door. It was propped open by a metal bucket, allowing him to slip inside relatively quietly if you overlooked the way his boot dragged a little with every step.
Taehyung’s eyes fell on you straight away. He felt himself relax somewhat instantly, just your presence unknowingly putting him at ease. You had that effect on him.
You stood with your back to him, ceramic mixing bowl balanced on your forearm as you folded a creamy mixture with a wooden spoon. He had tried some of your confectioneries, anticipating the times you would slip them to him during his breaks while your father was out front. Taehyung could confidently say you made the best croissants he had ever tasted, understanding immediately why customers returned day after day to experience the buttery goodness melting on their tongues time again.
Even while working, he thought you were beautiful. The effortless waves that usually cascaded across your shoulders had been tied back with an elastic, exposing the perfect curve of your jaw. He noted the way you hummed gently under your breath in time with the soft accordion crackling over the radio. Taehyung pressed his back to the far wall, watching your delicate ministrations with an air of amusement at your blissful obliviousness. Before long he cleared his throat, snorting when you almost dropped the bowl in surprise. You spun on your heels, another bout of shock taking over as you discarded the tools in favor of rushing across the kitchen to where he smiled at you lazily.
“Tae!” You hissed, grabbing his shoulders to drag him out of the direct line of view from the front of the bakery. Glancing side to side to check the coast was clear, you kept your voice to a whisper as you scolded him. “You know you aren’t meant to be in here!”
“I know, I know, I’m sorry,” Taehyung said a little too loudly for your liking, resulting in a stern look. “I needed to see you.” He lowered the volume a little, unintentionally though as embarrassment began to rise in his cheeks at his admission.
“You wanted to see me?” You blurted. He gripped your elbows firmly, thumbs rubbing gentle circles into the flesh there as he scanned your face for any indication that you were uncomfortable. “You are lucky you didn’t see my father on the way in here!”
“I always want to see you.” He confessed. “Just this time I actually had the courage to do it.”
“You don’t usually?”
“I’m pretty sure your father would fire me if he caught me in here,” Taehyung span you around so the small of your back pressed against the counter, settling himself between your legs. “But I’m pretty sure I just gave him a reason to do that already, so I’ve got nothing to loose.”
“What?” You exclaimed, hand covering your mouth when the words came out a little to loudly than was appropriate for the current situation.
“I messed up. Dropped a sack of flour while he was watching me.” You couldn’t help but giggle against the palm of your hand as he explained, the image of your unforgiving father’s face enough to weaken your knees.
“So that is why you are covered in white stuff?” You manage to let out, thumb coming to swipe at the layer of flower that obscured his nose. Your hand paused against his cheek, feeling the way his face stretched into a smile.
“Yeah,” His breath was warm against your forehead. Taehyung’s eyes drew a line down your face until they reached your lips, his own slightly parted with want. “I’d kiss you but I don’t want to get flour on your face.”
Your breath caught in your throat at his words. “I don’t mind.”
Taehyung’s heart somersaulted in his chest as he gently cupped your chin in his large hands, fixated on you. The rest of the world faded to a buzz, your vanilla scent consuming his senses deliciously and his heart a thumping reminder of how long he had been waiting for this moment.
Deciding he was taking too long, you encourage him a little by tugging on the collar of his shirt, the small push enough for him to finally connect his lips to your own. Warmth spread through Taehyung’s entire body, the feeling of your plump lips moving against his own enough to make him dizzy. Your fingers tugged at his hair - it was a little longer now, enough to wrap the blonde strands around your fingers as if to ground yourself - or perhaps to keep him from disappearing, convinced the way your body melted against his was a figment of your dreams. His tongue snaked out to run along the stretch of your bottom lip, educing a soft sigh to leave your chest.
As soon as the moment began it was over, Taehyung pulling away almost too soon, lips tingling where they had touched yours. He panted heavily, finally taking a breath after what felt like hours. High on the kiss you had just shared, you fell against Taehyung, burying your nose in the crook of his neck while his arms simply tugged your body as close to him as he could manage.
“Holy shit.” He whispered against your cheek. “That was-”
“Amazing.” You breathe before he could finish.
“Am I interrupting something?” A thick accent permeated the atmosphere, bringing you both back to reality before you were ready. Taehyung’s jaw snapped shut, forehead crinkling in a mixture of humiliation at being caught in the kitchen but mostly panic when he realized he had been caught kissing his boss’s daughter.
You swore you had never seen him move so fast, the warmth of his body gone in an instant as he leaped as far from you as possible, avoiding the gaze of your father who had entered the kitchen who knows how long ago. Maybe he didn’t see.
“Taehyung, I need to speak to you.”
Oh god. He saw.
Red hot heat rose in your cheeks, embarrassment washing over you before the implications of his words hit you fully. “Papa! Please don’t do this, it was my fault not his-”
“No, sir, this was all me.” Taehyung interrupted, raising his hands in surrender. “Please don’t blame y/n for what I initiated.”
You must have looked a picture, both pleading wide eyed and embarrassed and you were sure you saw the hint of a smile creep into the corners of your fathers mouth.
“If you would let me finish,” your father tried again, “I was going to tell Taehyung that he will be working out front from tomorrow morning.”
You both stared at him open mouthed, astounded that he did not seem angry or at all intent on firing Taehyung.
“O-oh, I - thank you! I uh, won’t let you down.” Taehyung coughed after a few moments of silence, bowing his head in a sign of appreciation.
“You are a hard working kid. Consider it a promotion.” Your father tugged at his apron as he made his way back into the bakery. Just as you thought you were in the clear, his voice sounded again from the distance. “But no funny business in my kitchen!”
Taehyung wasted no time resuming his earlier position, wiping a spot of flour at the corner of your mouth that had transferred from his face. “No funny business? I can’t make any promises.”
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Taehyung fell into routine quickly, so quickly that he almost stopped longing to remember what came before he met you as he was sure it could not have been as perfect as this.
Your apartment was small but it felt bigger since Taehyung started living with you. It was like your beings fit together like a perfect jigsaw, never once falling over one another and always somehow in sync. Everything felt fresh and new and enhanced somehow, the town a little more vibrant, the warmth of the bakery a little more inviting and your bed a little more comfortable while sharing it with someone else.
Life was simple and that was the beauty of it. Weekdays were mostly spent at the bakery, you in the kitchen and Taehyung serving customers out front, occasionally sharing looks in the form of a smile or the simple cock of an eyebrow in between hushed rendezvous carefully calculated to begin and end before your father came back from his break. Weekends were for laundry dates and reading books with your head in his lap, him pretending to read over your shoulder but losing his place half way through in favor of watching your face instead.
Evenings were for drinking chamomile tea in your bed, legs tangled in one another as you told stories of life before him - what you remembered of your mother, your childhood cat, the time you slipped at the harbor and broke your collar bone. Taehyung always felt a little guilty that he could only listen, unable to tell stories of his own because as hard as he tried he just could not remember. You had tried to reassure him, reminding him that you knew this Taehyung so it didn’t really matter who he used to be.
That night was like any other; your head on his chest as you recounted a childhood story in between giggles. His hand stroked your silky hair gently and he enjoyed the way your eyes fluttered shut when his fingers massaged your scalp. The sight of your cheek pressed to his bare chest was enough to send his heart into overdrive, three words lingering at the tip of his tongue but never quite confident to leave it. I love you. He was sure of it.
“Tae?” You mumbled, raising your head to look at him bemusedly. “Are you listening to me?”
“Mmmf - what?” He replied, scratching the nape of his neck as he sent you an apologetic look. “I was listening!”
“What was the last thing I said?” You kicked the covers away from your body, throwing a leg over his lap to hover over him playfully. “Prove it.”
“You were saying…” He paused for a moment, staring into the distance as he tried to recall something to no avail. “Fine, I was distracted. Now just shut up and c'mere.”
Before you could protest, his lips were on yours. He tasted like Jasmine and herbal tea and you just about melted into his touch, moaning slightly when his hands pressed you to him roughly at the back of your neck. Kissing you had become all too easy for Taehyung, never satisfied until his lips were moving against yours and immediately starved once they parted.
You were the one to pull away first, tugging his bottom lip between your teeth and watching the way his eyes glazed over at the sensation. “Distracted by what?”
“By you.” Taehyung practically growled as he gripped your wrists, managing to flip you onto your back so he was above you, his knee pushing between your legs. “You make me forget everything.”
“How so?” You nibble on your bottom lip as his hands push you firmly into the mattress. His eyes were boring into yours but his dark stare only excited you.
“You’re doing it again!” He groaned, swallowing thickly as he relished the way you felt so soft, so needy beneath him. “I can hardly control myself when you look at me like that.”
Placing your palms carefully against his cheeks, you pull him in for a kiss, a warm tingle spreading through your chest when his nose brushes yours. His finger tips traced your jaw, dragging down the expanse of your neck and arms before rubbing feather light circles into the flesh of your waist that peeked out from the top of your pajama shorts. Taehyung’s actions were soft and so sweet you were sure you would melt under his touch.
You barely left his lips for long enough to take a breath before your tongue was tracing his bottom lip, begging for entrance which he granted with a sigh. Your arms looped around the back of his neck, your wrists grazing his bare back and sending shivers through his entire body.
Taehyung wasn’t sure how much longer he could last before he caved. So far, sweet kisses and lazy make-outs were the furthest you had taken things and honestly, he was happy for things to stay that way. As long as you were comfortable, he didn’t care - Taehyung was determined that if things were going to go any further it had to be under your circumstances - so, until you initiated anything he was content to just be as close to you as possible.
Unfortunately, that didn’t stop nature from taking its course - Taehyung’s problem was more than obvious, his hard on grazing your inner thigh as you desperately clawed at him, ever deepening the kiss. He could not help the small groan that left him at the contact, a hot blush sweeping your cheeks when you realized his predicament.
Leaving your swollen lips with a pop, Taehyung rolled to your side and scooted towards the edge of the bed. “Fuck,” He said through broken breaths, heels grazing the carpet as he avoided your gaze, unsure why he was embarrassed. He was always comfortable around you. Taehyung knew you could never judge him. “I had better go to the bathroom - ”
“Wait!” The cold raised the hairs on your arms almost as soon as his warmth was gone, an unbearable emptiness. You appreciated that Taehyung was respectful of your wishes - it made you feel safe in his company, wanted for more than what your body had to offer. More than anything, though, it told you that he was the right person to do this with and his sudden withdrawal confirmed just how much you wanted it, needed it. “Taehyung, I want this.”
You scrambled to your knees, wrapping your fingers around his wrist before he could escape and forcing him to face you once again. His eyes softened as he scanned your face, searching for any indication that you were unsure. “Really?”
A gentle tug encouraged him to return to his earlier position above you, though on his knees this time. Your hands shakily closed around the hem of your shirt, pulling the loose garment over your head. Taehyung’s eyes raked down across your bra before raising to meet yours again, his mouth agape a little. “Really.” You insisted.
At your confirmation, Taehyung was on you again almost immediately, hands finding any expanse of skin they could, enjoying the way they glided across the smooth surface of your stomach and the dips of your collar bones. His lips followed soon after, leaving open mouthed kisses to your forehead and then your nose and then a series down the valley of your breasts. His ministrations caused your core to throb, a bout of heat hitting your lower regions deliciously.
Arching your back under his touch, you reach behind to unclasp your bra, enjoying the way Taehyung’s eyes widen as the fabric falls away to reveal your hardened nipples. He wastes no time taking one between his lips, evoking a whimper from you as his teeth graze the nub. Your fingers weave into his hair, a series of moans leaving your lips as he begins to work their way down your stomach to the waistband of your shorts.
His thumbs slip beneath the hem, teasing gently as he asks for permission. “Can I?” His voice is husky, laced with desire as his finger tips dance across your thighs.
“Please.” You manage to gasp out, taking it upon yourself to start removing the barrier between him and your heat, the place you wanted him more than anywhere else. Taehyung’s breath hitched in his throat when he took in the sight of your panties, already sticking obscenely to your heat as you squirmed beneath his gaze. “I need you, Tae.”
“Fuck me,” Taehyung mumbled under his breath, mouth dry as he settled between your legs. His hair tickled your inner thigh and you writhed with anticipation. “I want to taste you.”
He lowered his head again, returning to his previous ministrations as he placed wet kisses to both of your thighs, teasing you by ignoring your sweet spot. Your heart was racing, practically beating out of your chest. “Taehyung?”
He stopped instantly, neck snapping up to scan your face. “Do you not want me to?”
“What? No! Trust me, that’s not it,” You jump to reassure him, dragging your thumb against his cheek to validate your statement and appease the worry evident in his irises. “It’s just…I’ve never done this before.”
“No one has ever eaten you out?” He blinks at you through his lashes, surprised at your confession, mainly because he couldn’t understand how anyone could manage to keep their hands off you.
“Opportunity never presented itself?”
“Don’t worry,” His head dipped back down again. “Just relax.” Taehyung carefully placed a final kiss directly to your heat, breath hot against your wetness through the fabric of your panties. Finally at the height of your impatience, you slide the garment down your hips, Taehyung unhooking them from your ankles before throwing them somewhere behind him, eager to finish what he started.
“Fuck, y/n.“His hands felt like fire against your thighs and you were sure the imprint of his palms would remain as he pushed your legs open a little further, tongue slipping out to wet his lips as he finally laid eyes on your heat. "You are beautiful.”
Before you could respond, his tongue was dragging a long stripe up the length of your slit, sending pleasure through you as he swirled around your sensitive clit. You gasped at the sudden contact, hands threading through his hair which only served to encourage him further, pulling your clit between his lips and sucking obscenely.
“Oh my god Tae,” You groaned, back arching as he dragged his tongue all the way to your entrance. “Fuck, don’t stop.”
Taehyung began thrusting his tongue in and out of you, enjoying the way you instinctively clench around him. A string of pleading whispers began to fall from your lips as he slowed his ministrations.
“What do you want?” He questioned, breathing labored as he ran his fingers up and down your sides comfortingly.
You twisted under his burning hot touch. “Fingers. Please.” You were barely able to mutter the words in between your own short inhales.
Taehyung simply smirked, gently easing a single finger into your entrance, moving slowly to begin with as you adjusted to the feeling before his tongue was back, teasing your clit once again. Before long, he sensed you were still a little empty, adding another finger, increasing the pace of his thrusts and focusing his mouth on your folds.
His tongue felt like heaven and you could feel your orgasm building steadily. Taehyung grazed your swollen clit with his teeth and before you could fathom it, you were coming hard with a sharp cry, entire body shaking as you came down from your blissful high.
Taehyung gave a few final kitten licks to your oversensitive folds before pulling away when you began to shudder and writhe due to overstimulation, sitting up and allowing you to pull him into a deep kiss. It felt different somehow - if that was even possible at this point - as though you were more connected than before.
“You are fucking incredible.” He mumbled against your cheek when you broke the kiss, placing his hands over yours as you fumbled with the button of his pants. Before long he was shimmying them down his thighs, discarding them at the foot of the bed in favor of enjoying the way you cupped his erection through his boxers, a low groan leaving his throat at the much needed contact.
“Take these off,” You practically pleaded, wrestling with the fabric of his boxers. “And fuck me already.”
“I’m getting there.” Taehyung chastised, still fulfilling your request by pulling the shorts down his thighs. His dick was finally freed, slick with precum as he hissed at the sudden cold air against his length.
“Don’t act like you aren’t eager.” You whispered against his ear, the hint of a smirk evident in your voice as you nibbled at the base of his neck, making him shiver.
Suddenly, Taehyung wrestled you down onto the mattress, causing a few giggles to flutter from your lips at the unexpected dominance. A smile threatened the corners of his own lips, despite his desperate need to take you then and there. “You know I’m eager, baby.”
Taehyung leaned over your body to reach the nightstand, his instincts correct as he successfully located a condom before sliding it over his length. The contact caused a sharp hiss to leave his throat and he felt dizzy imagining what was about to come.
“Let me know if you feel uncomfortable, okay?” Taehyung hovered over you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear sweetly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
You nod in return, biting your lip to hold back an anticipating moan. He ran the head of his dick up and down your folds, coating himself in your slick before finally pushing  into your heat. His hands gripped your hips, holding you in place and allowing him to keep himself grounded.
“Oh fuck,” He drawled when he finally bottomed out, your velvety walls almost too much around his sensitive dick. His voice was strained, cracking a little as he desperately tried to fight the haze of pleasure and keep a grip on himself. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
He waited for you to adjust, lidded eyes watching as yours fluttered closed once he finally entered you.
“Move, please.” You gasped.
He didn’t need to be told twice, drawing his length out almost all the way before slowly thrusting back to the hilt. The pace was almost agonizingly slow, long whines slipping past your lips as Taehyung buried his face in the crook of your neck, hot breath fanning your shoulders.
“Just fuck me, already.” You whimper. You bucked your hips impatiently, squirming as you felt his dick enter inch by inch, getting used to the way he filled you deliciously.
“God, you are going to kill me.” Your words seemed to be all he needed to finally start moving properly, increasing his pace as he finally lost himself above you. His low groans filled the room and before long you found yourself meeting his thrusts.
Taehyung pressed his thumb to your clit, circling it in time with his thrusts and before long you felt another high begin to take you, another orgasm causing you to shudder beneath him. Feeling your walls clench tightly around his dick was all it took for him to come undone, fingernails pressing into your flesh as he came with a dark moan.
Taehyung stayed like that for a couple of minutes, his face pressed into the crook of your shoulder as you both tried to catch your breath. You stroked a hand across the top of his head, pulling his face to yours to connect your lips in a kiss. It was slow and long and filled with words Taehyung wanted to say but hoped you could feel just through the way his lips moved against yours.
His bangs stuck to the beads of sweat that laced his forehead as he rolled onto his back, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling you close to him. You pressed your cheek to his chest, eyes closed as you simply listened to the way his heart beat began to return to normal.
“I told you so.” He mumbled, slumber already lacing his tone and threatening to sweep him up in its embrace before he was ready to leave this moment behind.
“Hmmf?” You question, confused.
“I forget about everything when I’m with you.”
And in that moment, Taehyung knew he was irrevocably, undeniably yours.
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a run-down of / my thoughts on the novel ‘trade secrets’
so! i’ve recently finished this beautifully written novel by @bettsican​, and am anxiously anticipating for the second book in the trilogy! (seriously, give it a read. it’s a great lgbtq+ thriller and mystery story, i promise you’ll love it!! you can find trade secrets in many places, including amazon, where it’s only $6)
as i was reading it, i noted down all the thoughts i had. it was fun, interesting, and kept me on the edge of my seat!
oh, and spoiler warning, of course.
Chapter One
okay. this is interesting. why are they in paris? or rather, why are they NOT in paris?
2080. damn.
who is cooper hall and why is he important i want to knowwwwwwww
Chapter Two
HOLY FUCK
CHAPTER ONE WAS A PROLOGUE
OKAY IF I DIDNT NEED TO BEFORE I HAVE TO READ IT NOW
-ahem- anyway
nate literally everything you think of has to relate to smoking, doesnt it?
clyde you absolutely bitch raccoon
im sort of piecing together what’s happening here? either way this is a SUPER interesting concept.
i love the idea of every word being important
nate look at you being a nice guy. testing the CAPS before giving them to ur clients
or maybe it’s just good business
but whatever
okay, so credits are money in this world. but how do people get them? obviously there’s what nate’s doing but what’s the legal way to get them? ill probably find out soon
if it wasnt explicitly said by betty that nate ends up with another guy (i forget his name. cooper?) i would have thought audry was the romantic interest
audry you loving caring hypocrite
i feel like she’s gonna be one of my favourite characters
who is this young man that dares disturb nate’s slumber
cooper? cooper.
Chapter Three
nate get up
u turtle get up and hurry down the stairs
or—okay you can fall into that drywall that works too
ohhhhh so nate is a detective. that’s interesting
i also love this idea of keeping secrets (haha trade secrets)
dude are you sure that your embarrassing entrance wasn’t the ONLY reason you blushed? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIG—
nate ur spending an awful lot of time looking at his features you funky little bisexual
oh damn ur smarter than u seem, just watching him take a single breath and you’re already making connections. i guess that’s why he’s a detective
im gonna assume this is cooper, even tho it never explicitly says so
i feel like we aren’t gonna get his name for a while, bc clients and whatnot and not getting attached
Chapter Four
NATE WEARS GLASSES???????
that’s kind of cute
im lowkey gay rn
anyway
NATE CALLED HIM SWEET-FACED AND PRETTY-FACED O K A Y
oh he has curly brown hair
and oh the glasses aren’t real glasses. oh. the use is actually pretty cool!
so from what im gathering civilians are people who don’t live in sanctuaries, and lemnis are people who do?
cooper sweetie why do u need so much money what have u done
nate’s pretty clever
HAH I WAS RIGHT WE AREN’T GONNA GET HIS NAME FOR A WHILE
well that’s that i guess
Chapter Five
he’s so timid awh
hehe he’s on nate’s bed
sorry
goddammit man calm down or else you’re gonna get everyone in a 5-mile radius around you arrested
wait…. zero-credit balance?? didn’t he just have a few hundred thousand credits???
OH THIS IS A FAKE PROFILE HE MADE
so cooper isn’t his real name either
oh
Chapter Six
oh we’re back to 2080
oh they’re back in the apartment??
it was obvious before but at this point it’s confirmed that they’re going to be doing some travelling together or something
Chapter Seven
this is getting really interesting i dont wanna stop reading and type everything that comes to mind
these are gonna be shorter now hehe
“i’d been a petri dish of mixed emotions and wild chemical changes for half the day” I LOVE THAT METAPHOR LMFAO
what happened with nate’s mom
i want to know
my prediction: she wanted him to either change up or completely remove the chip bc she did something horrible? or maybe she just wanted to leave idk im bad at predictions
either way it said she was crazy
o h
that’s why he’s terrified of cutting the chip
poor nate
Chapter Eight
oh this is strangely intimate
very intimate
i feel that, because cooper has such high pain tolerance (or doesn’t show pain), he has some backstory for it
Chapter Nine
lmao nate just went off didnt he
THEIR FLIRTING IS CUTE FHJKJDLSKAJDKLSJAK
also is being lgbtq+ widely accepted as the norm in this setting? bc nate considered cooper to be flirting with him
ughhhh it’s so good so far, from the character interactions to the suspense, especially in this chapter
Chapter Ten
rude cooper is rude, rude nate is even more rude
F E D O R A
“coop”
Chapter Eleven
aw i love jimmy already—
WHAT THE FUCK COOPER
EXCUSE ME
JIMMY
WHAT
HOW COULD YOU
goddammit
what the fuck is cooper hiding
cooper oh my god
you
you’re playing a dangerous game, mate
are you really that heartless
“deceptively innocent eyes” you got that right
this chapter hurted
thanks a lot jess
Chapter Twelve
“like a weeping wound on the canvas of my home” this has got to be one of my favourite similes ever omg
the way nate’s describing cooper makes my heart hurt awh
i feel like butterflies have some sort of symbolism
maybe being ugly on the outside and beautiful on the inside, or vice versa? the vice versa was basically cooper lol
aye we finally get to meet audry!!
PEANUT BUTTER AND TRICYCLE I WANNA HEAR ABOUT THAT
i love audry omg
IT’S NATE’S BIRTHDAY?? HAPPY BIRTHDAY YA SMOKEY CONMAN
“bright eyes” is the cutest nickname ever
Chapter Thirteen
oh we’re back to 2080
wait what they’re trapped together
is this story gonna have a sad ending
please no
Chapter Fourteen
OH IT’S THE LINE ON THE COVER
i like that
nate’s back to where he left cooper
also if it wasn’t obvious before, it’s definitely obvious now that nate and cooper or gonna find each other again. hm. not sure how i feel about that
kind of pissed at cooper but also we need him for the story to progress
O H
COOPER IM ONLY KIND OF PISSED AT YOU NOW
IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE
NATE IVE SAID IT BEFORE BUT YOU’RE PRETTY CLEVER
also who is ‘her’?
COOPER WANTS TO BECOME A?? LEMNIS?? GODDAMMIT MAN
I CAN FEEL THE PRESSURE RISING
nate’s in danger
wow this chapter is
a lot
i need a break
-cue a break-
Chapter Fifteen
i’m back
eisley is a cool last name
oh wait so even people outside of sanctuaries can become a lemniscate
i’m still not 100% sure what a lemniscate is
it’s so ironic elijah’s last name is king, but i assume you did that on purpose. i also like the slight nod to royalty by his first name
OH
COOPER’S BACK
why hello there
Chapter Sixteen
they’re
competing
to become a lemniscate
and one of them dies
do they fight back?? is that why they end up in prison??? so many thoughts are going through my head right now
nate, your fantasy about becoming a lemniscate is surprisingly dark. i’m totally down for it
Chapter Seventeen
oh wait so joshua is cooper’s blackmailer?? Interesting that it’s a lemniscate
i keep forgetting nate is wearing glasses
cooper, my dude, calm the fuck down. you’re gonna get yourself and nate killed
it’s the return of soft™ nate
Chapter Eighteen
oh there’s another one
oh this is very ominous i don’t like
Chapter Nineteen – Twenty-One
okay i was eating while i read so i couldn’t type here but just know that these chapters were really really good
Chapter Twenty-Two
wait fuck what’s happening this is all happening so fast
cooper brought out his gun,,,, it’s aimed at ivonne,,,,,,, they’re walking,,,
OH IT WAS A FAKE KIDNAPPING
nice
i like ivonne a lot
Chapter Twenty-Three
the entire story just changed course
this isn’t just about cooper and nate anymore, it’s about a corrupt government
NATE AND COOPER ARE HOLDING HANDS AS THEY RUN THROUGH THE BARRIER THAT’S SO ROMANTIC
also the line “only the dead are ever truly free” is beautiful
THAT’S WHERE PARIS COMES IN
THEY ALL GO TO FRANCE DON’T THEY
I’m so curious to find out where this story is going
Chapter Twenty-Four
this is doin me a confusion
but tbh these hints/ visions of the future, if you could call them that, are giving just enough information to keep me super interested. props to you
Chapter Twenty-Five
AUDRY STOP TEASING NATE
just joking keep doing it, this might actually get their relationship somewhere
ivonne is definitely my favourite character so far. she reminds a little of melia from xenoblade chronicles, in that they’re both ‘royalty’ that rebel. also they’re badass and smart
oh fuck the brother is here
okay thank god he’s not an asshole
oh god things are happening again
Chapter Twenty-Six
nate stop ogling at cooper when you’re in a life-or-death situation
holy shit the lemniscate are messed up
this crew is pretty great, it sucks that it’s almost the end of the book
WAIT I FORGOT THERE’S A SECOND COMING SOON HECK YEAH
anyway
YES COOPER PULL THROUGH
awwww yiss
Chapter Twenty-Seven
oh
oh
O H
oh my god i ship them so hard
THEY KISSED
THIS IS SO STEAMY
this chapter was art thank you so much for this
Chapter Twenty-Eight
AHAHAH AUDRY
once again, i’d like to state how much i love her
oh the tension just grew twentyfold
this is… great
oh god nate what are you planning, you just got together with cooper and now you want to leave him?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
what’s with all the dancing?
Chapter Thirty
oh god the description
so he’s going around and giving people credits, all the while confessing things that would help the lemniscate track him down. i assume this means he’s going to die, but why?
just what are you planning?
oh we’re back to clyde, the guy who started it all. it feels full circle
Chapter Thirty-One
OH
HE’S MAKING HIS CHIP SHOW THAT HE’S DEAD
that’s much smarter
FUCK
NATE YOU IDIOT—COOPER’S REAL NAME
SHIT NOW KING IS HERE
everything’s going downhill now isn’t it
Chapter Thirty-Two
wait that took an even darker turn
there’s so much happening right now i can’thandlethis
cooper and nate are couple goals
Chapter Thirty-Three
king isn’t as horrible as i thought
still horrible, but not a monster
NEVER MIND YOU’RE A FUCKING MONSTER WHAT IS THIS BS
cooper
actually
shot
nate
Chapter Thirty-Four
OH MY GOD
WHAT
THIS IS HOW YOU END IT
I CAN’T
HOW DARE YOU
NO
NO
NO
NO
i need the next book
like right now
what the hell
Final Thoughts
okay so this book was SO good, and so well written. like damn
aside from that horrible ending how could you do this to me
i’m joking, it was an incredible and emotional ending, i loved it and hated it at the same time
it very rarely felt static, and especially in the first half, there was a good mix of action and backstory/description. it was never boring
the story is just,,, so unique. i seriously haven’t read anything like it, EVER
the world-building?? Is?? so vast?? and insane??
the increasing tension and speed as the story progressed is perfect, i felt my heart beating faster the more i read
anyway that’s all from me
this book was amazing i cannot wait for the next
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directoravasharpe · 6 years
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can u like bullet fic drunk sara and ava being all soft and comforting i really loved the concept
okay i am running with the the ‘six’ drink sara idea i first wrote about here
but it’s not six it’s like 12 because it’s sara not amy santiago
okay. set the scene. it’s the legends Drinking night. one night a month where they just all get utterly smashed. gideon refuses to deal with hangovers more often than that. if they get a hangover any other day of the month then she leaves them to Suffer.
sara takes a couple of months after getting back together before she invites ava because she is Not Scaring Her Off partly she’s worried about what she’s gonna be like partly she’s worried about what the legends are gonna be like
but at like three months they’ve slept over a million times they’re solid and so sara invites her.
sara had already had like two drinks during the day so when the evening starts she’s strictly already at
Two Drink Sara
aka normal sara (she’s an alcoholic is legends ever goign to talk about that i’m pretty sure she’s an alcoholic like she has a genetic predisposition to that anyway) pretty chill. maybe slightly more happy than usual but that might just be because ava has gotten there
Three Drink Sara
getting a little more bubbly. teasing ava a bit more, about like, literally anything, because she’s Comfortable. squishing in closer than is necessary, because ava is nice and warm and cuddly
Four Drink Sara
suddenly she is so touchy feely. if she was cuddly before, now she’s on another plane. not overtly sexual, just wrapping her arms around ava and pulling her in literally as close as possible. cheek kisses. hands everywhere, touching ava because she Can. ava trying to look disapproving at the PDA but she’s two drinks in and she’s just blushing slightly but not stopping sara because sara’s adorable
Five Drink Sara
sara gets five drinks in and suddenly its like Hello It Is Sex Time. the touching like, immediately crosses a line. sara’s hands are Under Ava’s shirt and it’s not strictly visible to anyone else because of how close they are but it’s still like. a thing. ava squirming but still not really pushing her away. sara trying to get into ava’s lap. full on makeouts that the legends only notice because of how long they’re lasting. quick kisses aren’t enough to distract them all from their various drinks/conversations, but sara trying to get ava’s clothes off is like, just about enough
Six, seven, eight
while trying to get ava’s clothes off, sara is, somehow, still drinking, and ava, still only like two drinks in is like. babe. sara. maybe you should stop drinking.
sara keeps drinking. five drinks was kinda peak horny and as she gets more drunk she’s still trying but it’s getting like, less and less effective. like eventually if ava kisses her it pretty much stops her from doing anything else, so she’s not trying to literally fuck ava right in the kitchen because she can’t concentrate on anything else
ava just keeps being sweet but not letting sara push things too far because lbr it’s real hard to resist sara lance when she’s trying to jump you but she restrains herself because Sara is Very Drunk and Ava is a Good Girlfriend
at eight drinks, she gets like... slightly mean? not horribly so, just, at that point, she has basically no filter. she just about knows that ava has stopped them from having sex but isn’t like 100% sure why so is just like. why are you boring. why are you like this.
the legends reassure ava that she always gets mean right about now, and that it’s nothing to worry about. that what she should be worrying about is....
nine, ten
sad sara. after getting mean sara gets sad because like she’s got that cool gives no shit thing going on but inside she’s a freaking softy and she has so much trauma and has done so many terrible things and that drunk, with literally no memory filter, no defense mechanisms up, literally everything is coming back to her, and she’s just breaking down, still drinking
ava is physically trying to stop her drinking at this point. the legends are kinda watching like. shit. she doesn’t usually get this far.
ava doesn’t know what to do with that information because it makes it sound like sara is only like this because of her, and she doesn’t know how to interpret that. like sara felt comfortable enough to go this far but also it’s heartbreaking and eventually all the other legends kinda.... disappear
eleven, twelve
sara downs the last two while ava has turned away. she’s gone right through practically unconscious and is back to trying to piss ava off. she’s still sad, though, and being more conscious makes things worse, so she’s just leaning into ava, face on her shoulder.
ava’s just making soothing sounds and comforting her because like, she’s stone cold sober at this point, and sara’s teasing her/telling her off for that because You’re Supposed to Get Drunk, Ava, That’s The Whole Point and ava is like i would rather be looking after you and sara is all mumbly and still kinda sad and just like. that’s sappy. you’re sappy. i like you.
and ava thinks she’s getting a bit better but then she’s crying again and ava tries to get her to stand up but sara’s legs aren’t working or she’s not letting them work. ava sits back down, pulls a tissue out of her pocket, goes to give it to sara and then is just like fuck it i’ll do it myself, so she’s cleaning up the tears and is just like.
sara. are you okay. and sara is shaking her head and she can’t even look at ava, just goes back in for a hug, obviously needing the touch and the support and they just stay like that for a bit until sara pulls back, looks at ava, is like, suddenly almost completely lucid: i love you. ava says it back, kisses her, and then it’s like the drunkenness hit’s sara all of a sudden again because she’s flopping against ava and ava is like? bed?
and sara just sleepily nods like yes please bed. can’t walk though. legs not working. ava just rolls her eyes because like they probably are working but sara always gets what she wants and in any case she only has to get as far as the portal so Sara gets to be carried for all of five seconds and honestly like sara is tiny but she’s also 95% muscle and that shit is heavy so even Ava ‘giant biceps’ Sharpe can’t get her that far.
sara ends up sat on the bed while ava literally undresses her and she manages one last sleepy innuendo and gets one more eyeroll from ava. she puts on a shirt that is definitely a sleep shirt ava had left for herself, but ava’s not going to complain because seeing sara in her clothes makes her heart grow about ten sizes. she just finds the biggest shirt sara has in her closet and puts that on while sara sits on the end of the bed, practically dozing off.
ava manoeuvres her under the covers like: you couldn’t even do that yourself? sara, sobering up slightly is just like, nope, you have to do everything for me it’s in the girlfriend contract.
ava does the temple kiss and then gideon turns out the lights.
bonus:
hangover sara.
she’s good at not throwing up. as long as she is in the med bay a maximum of five minutes after she wakes up, she’s usually fine. ava wanders over with her. sara gets whatever IV gideon is giving her and is like. so. what embarrassing things did i do last night.
ava, who is a saint, and who isn’t going to embarrass sara over things she said when vulnerable, doesn’t say anything. luckily, gideon has no such qualms and relays everything is exquisite detail.
sara, once she’s heard everything: man, i can’t believe you didn’t let us fuck in front of my crew you’re such a spoilsport.
ava, chucking something at sara’s head: see if i carry u to bed next time you idiot
sara: you’re always gonna bc you’re Soft
Ava:.... maybe
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