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heroloverangel · 3 years

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Cloud City

We interrupt your regularly-scheduled filth for some surprise Sad Boy Hours.

You’re six years old when Oboro Shirakumo drops into your life. Quite literally, in fact.

It’s your first day of school, and you’re terrified. Your family only moved to this city a few weeks ago, and you haven’t had a chance to meet any of the other kids in the neighborhood. So here you stand in the school yard, shyly watching from behind a tree as your new classmates play together. You’re lonely, but too nervous to approach them. Your tiny mind is on the verge of a breakdown and you can feel the sting of tears in your eyes. “Don’t cry,” you whisper to yourself. “I’m not a baby, don’t cry.” You sniffle, but your train of thought is interrupted by the sound of a twig snapping above you.

There’s a boy floating on a cloud several feet over your head, one hand grasping a branch to keep himself steady. “Hi!” He grins down at you, and you look back with wide eyes. “I’m Oboro! Wanna be friends?” You gawk up at him; you’ve never seen a quirk like that before. Even his hair looks like a fluffy cloud in the breeze.

“Okay,” you agree after a few more seconds of confused staring. Your new friend gives you a thumbs up, immediately loses his focus, and the cloud dissipates underneath him. Both of you scream as he comes crashing to the ground, landing on your back. You’re rewarded with some impressive scrapes to both your knees, and him with both his front teeth knocked out. You’re inseparable from that moment on.

You’re the best of friends through elementary, but things begin to change once you hit middle school. It’s cute when you’re six and happily tell your parents that you’re going to get married when you grow up. It’s just awkward when you hit puberty and start to discover that your feelings for your best friend suddenly aren’t so cute anymore. The two of you grow apart with separate friends and different interests, but still make it a priority to walk home together every day.

“High school admissions are due soon,” he points out during one of these walks. It’s been storming all day, and the two of you huddle under the same umbrella in a half-hearted attempt to stay dry. He’s hit a growth spurt over the years and towers above you now; it’s hard for both of you to stay out of the rain if you’re not nestled suspiciously close together. “You figure out where you’re applying yet?”

You shrug, stepping wide to avoid a puddle that he ignores. “Probably just Endor. It’s close, and they’ve got a pretty decent reputation.” You nudge him with your shoulder. “You’re going for UA, right?”

It’s never been a secret that Shirakumo wants to be a hero, and there’s no doubt in your mind that he’ll be great at it. He stops walking and you look at him, surprised to see his expression so discouraged.. “Yeah, of course. You’re not? Their general studies class is supposed to be one of the best, too.”

You glance away. “Too much pressure, I think. And it’d be hard, going to school in a different city where I wouldn’t know anyone.”

“You’ll know me.” You’ve both had a grip on the umbrella, but now his fingers wrap tightly around your hand and squeeze.

“Oboro…” You’re not used to him having such a serious look on his face, his eyes wide and unblinking as they stare into yours.

“Come with me.” It’s not an order, it’s a plea, and your chest feels tight at the thought of disappointing him. You swallow hard and nod. It won’t hurt to apply, you think. You probably won’t even get in.

Shirakumo pushes a stray strand of hair out of your face and leans down to press his lips against yours. Your first kiss isn’t perfect; his neck is bent at an uncomfortable angle to make up for your height difference, your nose bumps awkwardly into his as you shift, a car drives by too fast and splashes both of you with frigid water. Still, when he pulls away his smile is as warm and bright as the sun. You’ll gladly follow him to UA. You’ll gladly follow him to hell and back if it makes him happy.

He’s accepted into the hero course without a problem, but you make him promise that he’ll go even if you fail. You’re more shocked than anyone when you open the envelope to find an acceptance letter welcoming you to UA, and you finally allow yourself to feel excited. You’ll be going to the best school in the country, and you’ll be there with your favorite person in the world. For the first time you won’t be in the same class, but you’ll still be close enough to watch him reach his dreams.

The first few weeks of high school are a whirlwind of chaos before you settle into a routine. You have to be at the train station before dawn; every morning Shirakumo meets you outside your house, still half-asleep and groggy as you walk. You split something simple for breakfast most days while you ride. When you’re lucky enough to find two open seats together, you can manage a well-deserved nap slumped against each other’s shoulders. Your classes are tough but with enough effort you manage to do well once you form a study group going with the other girls in your class. They’re friendly, and they’re both impressed and jealous to learn that you’re already dating a hero student. They swoon when he appears at your side on the first day of school to buy you lunch, and you can’t help but gloat just a little at your good fortune.

The hero course is even busier than general studies, and you don’t get to see much of your boyfriend during school hours. It’s nearly a month into the term before he catches sight of you at lunch again and practically sprints over, flanked by two classmates you recognize from the stories he’s told you on the ride home every day. “Guys,” he grins and throws an arm around your shoulder. “This is my girl! The one I’ve been telling you about.” Your heart skips a beat at being called his girl, and knowing he’s been gushing about you to his friends. Yamada’s a bright, loud ball of energy when he introduces himself, while Aizawa barely mumbles his name and looks like he’s been dragged over against his will. They both seem nice, and you’re happy he’s found some good friends to work with.

Everything goes surprisingly well for your first year at UA, and your second seems like it’ll be just as good. It’s late one night, several months into the school year, when you’re woken by a tapping at your bedroom window. This isn’t the first time Shirakumo’s snuck you out of your house, but the window gets harder to crawl out of every year and you’re glad that graduation isn’t too far off. “Hey, come look at the stars with me. They’re really pretty tonight.” It’s not like he needs to give you the excuse, but you can see he has a point.

Ten minutes later you’re laying on a cloud together, floating a few feet over the power lines in your neighborhood. It’s cold up there, and you cuddle together for warmth as you watch the stars overhead. You know more about the sky than him, and he’s happy to listen while you point out a few things above you. A chilly breeze blows through your thin pajamas and makes you shiver, and he pulls you in closer to share his heat. “Was all of this just an excuse to get me alone up here?” You laugh, kissing his smiling lips.

“Not all of it,” he jokes with a smirk. “We’re past the halfway point this year already. Just one more, can you believe it?” You curl up close and listen to him chatter about his big plans for the future. You’ve heard this all before; he’s always so excited about the idea of opening that hero agency with Aizawa and Yamada. “I figure we’ll do the sidekick think for awhile, work up some solid experience, y’know? Then it’ll be smooth sailing when we break off on our own after that. Four, maybe five years?” You nod, running your fingers through his familiar fluffy hair. “And then once things settle with the agency, we can get married if you want,” he announces with only the faintest blush betraying his nerves.

“Oboro, what?” You bolt into a sitting position, gawking at him with wide eyes. Sure you’ve thought about the future you might have together, but the two of you have never talked about it before. “You can’t just spring that on me out of nowhere!”

He folds his arms behind his head, totally unconcerned. “It’s not really out of nowhere, is it? You know I’ve been in love with you since we were six, right?”

This boy is ridiculous. “Me too, but still! Isn’t this a little sudden? There’s so much more to talk about if you want to get married.”

He shrugs. “Like I said, it won’t be for a couple of years. We’ve got plenty of time to talk it over.” He grabs your hand and pulls you back down to rest your head against his chest. “I’ll wait for you, as long as you want.” You stay like this for a few minutes, mulling the proposal over in your head. “Just think about it for a couple years, okay?”

Slowly, you nod. “Okay.” You’re already warming up to the thought of marrying him. You’re seventeen, and you’ve been together for eleven years now. You can give him another five. Or ten. Or fifty, if that��s what he wants. In your heart you already know you’ve decided on an answer, and you murmur it into his ear later as he’s helping you climb back through the window into your bedroom. He’s beaming with happiness as he kisses you goodnight and flies off. You’re too giddy with love to sleep the rest of the night.

If you’d known what was coming only a week later, you never would have said goodbye. He promised to call you after his internship the night before, but it wouldn’t be the first time he’d fallen asleep instead as soon as he got home. You’re not worried until he doesn’t show up in the morning to walk with you, even after you call him twice with no answer and wait until the last possible minute to leave on your own. You arrive at school just as the final bell rings, and it’s a bit of a relief when you catch a glimpse of Aizawa looking even more tired than he normally does. They must have had a really tough time on their patrol, you assume, and Oboro just decided to take a well-deserved day off.

Your day is uneventful until lunch, when you hear your name called to the office. The principal sits there with your homeroom teacher and the counselor, all of them looking grim. A lump forms in your throat; you’ve got no idea what you could have done. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes. We understand that you’re particularly close with Oboro Shirakumo from the hero class.”

You nod. “Yeah, we’re dating. Um, actually we’re kind of engaged now, I guess?” Your stomach drops at the sad expressions facing you. “Did...did something happen? I haven’t seen him all day. Is he hurt?”

Nothing in the world could have prepared you for the answer. “He was killed in an encounter with a villain yesterday. I’m sorry for your loss.”

You want to argue, insist there’s been some mistake, but the words don’t come. A sudden sense of numbness sweeps through you as it sinks in, and it feels like everything within you shuts down. Your brain doesn’t process the voices offering you sympathy and compassion. Your lungs refuse to take in air. You’d swear that your heart itself stops beating in some attempt to defend itself. You’re not even aware of your movements as you stand and leave the room while your teachers are mid-speech. You need to get out of there. You need to be alone. You need to breathe, but you can’t. You’re on autopilot as you rush down the empty hall, if you can get up to the roof there’ll be fresh air-

Completely blinded by your grief, you collide hard with another body and almost fall before hands grab your shoulders to steady you. “Sorry,” you gasp through the lump in your throat. “I just-” You blink back your tears and stop when you recognize him. Up close, he looks even worse than usual. His eyes are red and hollow, the dark bags under them could pass as bruises. It’s obvious he hasn’t slept all night, you can practically feel the exhaustion radiating off of him. “Aizawa,” you croak, your voice cracking on the syllables. He doesn’t say anything, only gives your shoulder a squeeze, and something inside you completely breaks.

“Oboro, he’s...” is all you can manage through your tears. You fists ball into Aizawa’s jacket as you sob against his chest, and he doesn’t stop you. He knows there’s no comforting you; the only thing he can do is let you use his shirt as a tissue while you mourn. You’re vaguely aware that a bell rings to resume class, but you ignore it. You can’t bring yourself to do anything except cry until there’s nothing left, and he stands there holding your shoulders to keep you upright. It’s the best way anyone can help you right now.

An eternity later, you wear yourself out. Your throat feels raw, your eyes are burning, and your fingers hurt from the grip you’ve had on his uniform. “Thanks,” you manage out, and he nods silently. He’s not the most exciting, but you’ve always liked Aizawa’s calm personality as a match to your boyfriend’s unstoppable energy. Your own emotions are a train wreck, and you don’t think you could handle being around anyone else after that news. “I’m glad he had you,” you muse out loud.

“Thanks,” he says awkwardly with a shrug before fixing his wrinkled jacket. “You should get back to class.” Aizawa walks off before you can think of anything else to say.

You don’t go back to class. The other students have noticed something’s off, and rumors are beginning to spread around campus already that there’s a new, empty space in the hero course. You grab your bag and head for the exit as fast as you can, ignoring everyone else along the way. You spend the rest of the week at home; your parents allow it once they learn what happened. It’s a struggle to get through the first month without Shirakumo’s presence hanging over you like a cheerful little cloud, and the rest of the year doesn’t get any easier. Your friends do their best to console you, but it’s a losing battle when you feel his absence every minute of your day. It’s all too familiar, too easy to see the missing piece that’s been a part of your life for so long. You transfer to Shiketsu for your final year, where no one knows about Loud Cloud and you aren’t stuck going through a routine that’s been irreparably broken.

It’s an uphill fight. You force yourself to do well in school, because it’s what he’d want for you. You throw yourself into work and establish a good career, because it’s what he’d want for you. You make yourself move past your loss and date other men, because it’s what he’d want for you. By the time you’re 31 you’ve got a divorce under your belt, a sad excuse for a social life, and a cat with fluffy white fur; you loved him the moment you laid eyes on him. You’re not entirely satisfied with how your life has turned out, but it could be worse. You can go entire weeks now without thinking about him. Sometimes you wonder what kind of life the two of you would have, but you try not to dwell on those thoughts.

You’ve had the day off and have spent it happily lounging around the house. You treat yourself to lunch and settle on your couch to watch a movie with your beloved cat when an unfamiliar number pops up on your phone. You answer without a second thought. “Hi, if you’re out of noodles, I can just get rice instead. It’s fine.”

There’s a beat of silence before the man confirms this is the correct number. You don’t immediately recognize his voice, but you’re sure you’ve heard it somewhere before. “I’m not with a restaurant. This is Aizawa, from...from UA, when we were younger.” You can tell he’s choosing his words carefully, and he continues. “We need to talk. It’s about Shirakumo.”

It’s surprising how hearing his name is enough to reopen wounds you thought healed years ago. You swallow nervously, fresh dread pooling in your gut. You can hear how hoarse your voice is when you answer. “Okay. I’m off today, if you want to meet.”

You’ve got a very bad feeling about what you’re about to learn.

#bnha x reader #oboro shirakumo x reader

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nathanknowsitall · 3 years

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Touch Starved

Summary: Peter Parker, your crush, finds you severely touch starved and on the verge of tears in a subway station.

Notes: I’ve been feeling touch starved lately so this is dedicated to everyone that’s been feeling the same. <3

Peter didn’t know you that well, but seeing the way that you were hugging yourself as you slightly shook in the subway station made his heart hurt. But what concerned him more was the fact that you seemed to be on the verge of tears.

He wanted to approach you, but didn’t want to scare you off. He knew that you probably wouldn’t know him or remember him.

To you, he was just someone that you sat next to in English class and talked to once or twice. To him, you were the really pretty girl that he kinda has a crush on and that is nice to him when grading his horribly written papers.

He then heard you start to sniffle and knew he had to get over his personal qualms to help you.

“Hi Y/N, are you okay?”, Peter quietly said as you looked at him with your sad, watery eyes, seeming surprised. Shit, Peter thought as he tried to figure out what to say to not seem like an absolute creep.

“You probably don’t remember me-”, he says as you interrupt him by letting out a small giggle.

“Peter, I know who you are, we sit next to each other in English”, you say as you try to fix your appearance. It was so embarrassing to be caught by your crush crying over a stupid thing like being touch starved.

Peter let out a quiet “Oh”, as he watched you take a tissue out of your backpack, dab at your face, and put your slightly mussed up hair back into a ponytail, making yourself look as beautiful as ever. Peter was both amazed and concerned at how easy you recovered from a breakdown.

“I just wanted to know if you needed anything, you know? Or if you just wanted to talk because you were crying earlier...unless you feel fine now, you look great, by the way - not that you don’t look great all the time, just that you were crying a couple of minutes ago and you don’t look like you were crying at all? How do you do that? I-”.

“Peter”, you said before Peter could make you blush even more at the weird, but sweet ramble of compliments he was going on, “I’m fine. It was just something stupid.”

“It can’t be stupid if you’re crying about it”, Peter said with a serious and determined voice, as if he was going to fight off whatever hurt you, making you giggle. Peter’s face became confused at your reaction and even more at your words.

“Peter, it’s literally nothing. Don’t worry about it, you can’t even do anything about it. It’s just something that will pass...”, you said mysteriously. Peter immediately was interested.

“Okay, now you have to tell me...”, Peter said, half teasing, half serious.

Looking into Peter’s beautiful brown eyes you couldn’t not tell him.

“Do you know what being touch starved is?”, you said expectantly. Peter wracked his mind for where he had heard that before, when he remembered learning about it in AP Psychology.

“Yeah, it’s like when you need to be touched or it makes you...oh, that makes sense”, Peter softly says as he realizes why you were crying. You smile as you hear the small amount of pity in his voice, realizing how pathetic you must sound to Peter right now. You wanted to leave.

“Yeah, well that’s kinda the gist of it, so thanks for letting me...you know...talk to you. I’m so sorry for unloading this on you, I gotta go...see you at school tomorrow, Peter”, you said as you got up off the bench you were sitting on.

But Peter caught your hand before you could leave, making you turn back and look at him. Your hand felt warm and you immediately didn’t want to leave anymore.

“Peter...”, you said hesitantly as you looked at your hand being held by Peter’s.

“I don’t mind holding your hand for a couple of minutes if it means that you’ll feel even a tiny bit better”, he said, his voice overflowing with sincerity.

Your eyes felt wet, but for a different, better reason now as you sat back down while Peter held your hand.

“Thank you Peter. You really don’t have to do this.”

“But I want to. I want to do this with you.”

You blushed as you tried to avoid Peter’s gaze that you felt intently on you.

“Do you feel up to getting some coffee? I know a good place that’s close?”, Peter offered.

You felt yourself nod before you could even bothered to really think about it, but it was worth the toothy smile that Peter sent your way.

Peter had a new mission today: To hold your hand as long as you needed him to.

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jungnoir · 3 years

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destiny | 09;

⇢ summary: you’re just about ready to give up on life altogether; your love life is in ruins, you’ve lost your job, and your family couldn’t care less about you… and then you meet your blushing guardian angel, and maybe life isn’t so bad after all.

⇢ relationship: jeon jungkook/reader, min yoongi/reader.

⇢ genre: supernatural, angel!au, demon!au, romance, thriller.

⇢ words: 6.5k words.

⇢ warnings: mentions of depression, violence, vomiting. slightly nsfw toward the end.

previously | next

a/n: happy new year! I know it’s been quite a while (literally an entire year since I’ve updated) but I’ve had this chapter pretty much ready in my drafts and just hadn’t gotten around to finishing because. everything. regardless, I hope this sort of makes up for it. love you all! hope you’re doing well. also WOW I swear a lot in this one.

His hand on your neck is meant to silence any screams that might slip out. He applies the perfect pressure to avoid crushing anything vital (and just by the feel alone, you know he’s got quite an amount of strength to pull that off) while simultaneously stealing all your air and forcing you to cower in fear. You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to know this guy isn’t someone to be fucked with, and all you can think about is the fact that Jungkook is right outside and has no fucking clue what’s going on. The very thought fills you with dread.

“Then again, you’ve got someone helping you.” What once was just a particular, calculated press against your skin becomes a deliberate act of violence as he begins to choke you harshly. You know the pain of his grip might last for weeks, and that’s only if you don’t die in the next minute. “Just makes me wonder what’s so special about you.”

“Nothing!” You rasp out, clawing at his hand now in some weak attempt at breaking away. If you could make enough noise, enough commotion, surely someone-

-but the stranger has already stopped you quick. You aim to throw the door open or something but his free hand quickly apprehends you until you’re just a squirming mess on the verge of passing out. Even your legs are pressed firmly to the wall by his own body, holding you fast so that you can’t help letting a few tears fall. There was no doubt in your panicked mind that this was Seokjin, the angel who’d been trailing you from the shadows for what felt like centuries. His grand act of approaching you, something you’d dreamed up to be a major climactic brawl in a battlefield made for a spectacle, turns out to be so simple. Perhaps that’s what you got for thinking biblically. Why go through all the trouble when he could just squash the problem the minute a chance presented itself?

Now, all you can think is “I can’t die like this”. A sobering thought of pure contempt. Drowning in the river was preferable to this.

You muster what breath you can, eyes blazing, “How does it feel… being God’s lap dog?”

Seokjin is, funnily enough, stunned for a moment. All bravado slips through a teeny crack in his demeanor when you say that, and even though it’s a low blow, it’s also enough for you to thrust a semi-powerful kick to the dressing room door to make the entire thing shudder like an earthquake. That sound, coupled with your comment, makes Seokjin release you in a panic. You hear some gasps from outside, a few people inquiring if you’re alright. An employee sounds most worried amongst the voices. You’re just shy of swinging the door open and forcing Seokjin to be revealed or to disappear all at once, but then he’s grabbed the back of your collar as you scream in frustrated fury. Seconds later, you’re no longer in the dressing room anymore.

Instead, you fall flat on a rough, sandy surface. You’re overwhelmed with nausea, pain, and fear, so your whole body is struggling to pick up on the most important things outside of that, but you do realize quite fleetingly that it’s sweltering. It takes you a few seconds as you curl up on the ground to peek behind your hands that shield your face and discover that it’s blindingly bright where you are, almost like a…

For fuck’s sake. “Of all the places…” You whine with a sore throat, coughing right after from the strain.

Seokjin stands above you and uses his foot to kick you onto your back so that you’re staring up at him and the baby blue sky. His hair color plays against it in an unfittingly gentle contrast, “I thought we might need somewhere safer to discuss things. Oh, and speaking of discussion,” he waves a hand near you and you instinctively flinch back before you feel the pain in your throat subside. You wait a few seconds, but it seems whatever he’d just done had no effect on the rising bile in your throat, so you assume that’s something you’ll have to deal with on your own. What an ass. “Feel better?”

“Fuck you! Maybe if you hadn’t choked me out in the first place-”

“You’d have listened?”

“Maybe if you hadn’t hunted us down to kill us, we would have!”

Seokjin frowns, “I didn’t bring you here to talk about you and that boy, I brought you here to talk about you. I am only concerned with you.”

Whatever that entailed did not sound good in the slightest.

You scramble to your feet and immediately regret the movement as it makes you sick again. The more than 100 degree weather does nothing to fix that either, the sun beating down on you and bouncing off the dusty white sands directly into your eyes. You’re feeling something nasty rising up from your stomach, ready to projectile…

Just as the scene changes, you paint a Victorian rug with streaks of your vomit.

Seokjin immediately groans out loud, placing a rough hand at the back of your neck like one would grab the scruff of a kitten. You’re far too weak to protest, rubbing at your mouth with the back of your hand, so you let him toss you into a chair. The jerkiness of the action should have sent another eruption out of you, but you recognize the relief that has overwhelmed you from the touch of his hand. Had he fixed that too?

“Never the matter,” the angel growls, waving his hand and making the mess evaporate from the very fibers of the rug, “you’re all very fragile. I should have prepared you first.”

“How can you do all that…?” You couldn’t recall Jungkook or Jimin showing off any power like that, and whether it was because of Seokjin’s status or their modesty (and adherence to rules), you were unsure. Most likely both.

Instead of answering right away, Seokjin reaches forward a moving cart and you finally notice there’s a glass pitcher of water (hopefully) next to an array of empty glasses. You take the time he spends pouring some water for you to examine your surroundings.

It looks like a secret room in an old English manor house. The walls are painted a deep charcoal and with the absence of natural light, you could mistake it for the void. The only light that does exist is a strangely dim white light coming from the ceiling. What looks like a rather ornate shell of a skylight (sans the window to actually reveal, well, a sky), seems to hide said white light somewhere in it. It’s such a vague glow that you can’t pinpoint if it’s coming from a lightbulb or magic.

The rest of the room is just as ornate as the “skylight”, filled with deep oak bookshelves, golden artifacts, and shining decorations that already look like they cost more than your house. It doesn’t really matter the longer you think about it. All of it has to be an illusion… right?

A glass is placed into your hand and you break out of your thoughts to make eye contact with Seokjin. He hovers over you with narrowed eyes and when you look back at your surroundings again, you notice all the little decorations have disappeared. Why had he- “We can negotiate those bits of the deal later if you so wish.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” You ask, hesitant to drink the water despite how much the heat of the desert had made you crave it.

“Like I said before, I brought you here to discuss you. I’ve been watching you and lover boy for a while and it has become clear to me that you’ve been pulled along for quite the ride. I’m sure it’s all very daunting.”

“It wouldn’t have been so bad if you hadn’t shown up.”

“How much do you know about our Lord and Savior?”

It was tricky to say the least. You’d grown up on tales of him, an over-powered being of immense stature. No one could come close to him, not even the devil. However, you’d learned bits and pieces from Jungkook, Yoongi, and the others to the point where your ideas of the figure had become skewed. There was no linear understanding of him. You honestly had no idea, “Probably not enough.”

Seokjin huffs, taking a seat from across from you in a chair similar to yours. Crossing a leg over the other, the angel stares you down, “Do you know why I’m after you both?”

“You want to kill Jungkook. Because he committed your sin.”

“Jungkook is my main target, yes, but it wasn’t my sin. My sin was sullying myself with a demon. Jungkook’s sin was sullying you.”

You frown, “He did no such thing! You had a fucking child! Jungkook saved my life!”

“You mean to say he ruined it. You were supposed to be dead a long time ago.”

You’d known that much, Jungkook had told you already. Even if he hadn’t, that had always been the plan. “It was… it was my choice and I wanted it then, I admit it. But I was hurt. I was overwhelmed. I wanted it because I was scared there would be no reason to keep going.”

The angel angles a brow upwards, “And the fallen was that for you? A reason to keep going?”

“It was- it was a lot of things. I was reminded that I existed, and that there are people who can love me the right way,” frustrated at the situation, you glare at him, “what the fuck? Is this some fucking therapy session?”

He has the gall to smile, “God knows you need one. I’d like to be the one to get inside that mind of yours.”

Shit. What if you’d given him just the right information to use against you?

You snap your lips shut and sink back into your chair, bubbling with more dread. He notices your sudden resolve and appears to want to ease your worries, “I’m not doing this to break you. Unlike God, I find you, as a person, quite redeemable. A gentle, pained soul who fell victim to the perversion of her guardian angel. It’s all very sad.”

So God did think you were a lost cause. Jimin had been right after all. However, you don’t want to keep talking when you’re so close to getting the information you’ve been waiting for. It seems even Seokjin isn’t fazed by your silence, continuing on without missing a beat. “You see, usually these angel and human matters can be chalked up to the angel getting too big for their britches. They think they can change things like fate: God’s very flawless plan from the beginning. They are simply… glitches in the matrix, you could say? That’s where I come in. I make sure these issues are handled and that everything goes back to normal. You see, God loves his humans. Truly. He has a bit of a temper, but it’s justified, you know? He loves you all so very much that seeing you stray from a holy and righteous path is heartbreaking for him. He can only excuse so much.

“So he doesn’t. But… sometimes I help him. I change his mind. Even Jesus had to convince God not to blame his executioners. The big guy gets real impassioned about those he loves. It’s all part of the territory of being in heaven’s sovereignty,” at this, Seokjin shrugs, “you were an unfortunate casualty of it. However, I brought you here because I think that you could be saved. You’re simply confused. I’m sure I could convince God to rethink... his punishment for you.”

Your eyes widen, nearly dropping your glass, “He’d do that?”

The angel nods, pleased, “Of course! After all, he just wants you to repent. If you show that you will, well, I could put in a good word for you. He and I are very close.”

“But only for me.”

Seokjin’s smile dims some. He was so sure he’d had you on the hook just then, “Well… yes. There isn't much I can say about angels. Humans are born sinful, but angels are born knowing better. If they succumb to sin, I cannot do anything about that. But… if you feel that you’d be leaving Jungkook behind, and if that would cause you to feel guilty, I can assure you that that would be taken care of. Your memory of him would be wiped clean and you’d receive another guardian angel in an instant. You’d be granted everything you ever wanted. You’d be able to live out a new path of life contrary to the one your fallen so selfishly carved out for you.”

At this, you begin to frown deeper than you ever have. It’s not out of confusion but deep, deep understanding. Seokjin’s deal was asking you to sell Jungkook out and in return… he’d make you happy. You’d forget all about what had happened and carry on a new person, virtually safe. You could only assume that meant forgetting Yoongi too. Everything you’d accomplished so far would be rearranged until the you that you’d become would be so unfathomable you wouldn’t ever consider it.

What scares you the most is that you actually consider it.

This all could end right now and you’d get out alive, maybe all the ordinary people you knew would get out alive too. You’d be completely removed from the situation. You’d just have to forget Jungkook.

“You asked me how much I know about God,” you start, thumbs twiddling, and Seokjin perks up, “the stories humans told of him always kind of scared me. He’s so powerful… he knew everything before it was even created. Nothing can get past him. And yet, he let humans have free will and the right to choose what their path in life would be. That part always boggled my mind. God’s supposed to love us unconditionally, but if we don’t return the favor, we suffer eternally. It seemed like a pretty big plothole in the otherwise ‘flawless plan’ you claim he made.”

“Yes, well, it’s not God’s fault that Lucifer’s so conniving.”

“But it is. Isn’t it? God created him. Lucifer is the one who brought sin upon the world but God is the one that created him. If he knows everything, why make him in the first place? It’s a fallacy,” Seokjin’s eye twitches just a bit as you lean forward, “that God knows everything. Isn’t it? He wouldn’t be so stupid. He had no fucking clue what he’d made when he made Lucifer.”

“I’d watch your tone. God hears all.” The angel’s ominous reply is all that you need to hear. He doesn’t tell you that anything else you’ve said is false or not. Of course not. You know as well as he does that you’re spot on.

You’re so stunted by the arrogance of it all that you have to laugh, “Allegedly.”

In that same moment, the white light above begins to flicker. A distant rumbling sounds from somewhere and that fear you’d felt earlier comes back with a vengeance. Seokjin looks annoyed, if anything, “I only have so much time to sit here with you to chat.” He stands up and walks over to you, seizing you by the arm, “So I’m telling you now that you still have a chance. No one else has to die. Do me a solid and make that a reality.”

Did he really not want to kill you? He’d had so many chances to. Even now, he could just… what did you have that made him hesitate? “You think I believe that?”

The ground rumbles underneath you and then you fall through, Seokjin’s grip slipping off your arm… or maybe being pried off.

Where you land next isn’t as disorienting as the last few times, but it doesn’t feel any better to be ripped away again without so much as a warning. For a moment before you land, you halt, almost floating. Then your feet make contact with stone and then your knees follow under the sudden press of gravity. A quick look around tells you that Seokjin is nowhere to be seen… and that where you are looks vaguely familiar.

The stone continues up the walls to the ceiling, creating a naturally cold room that expands no more than the size of a restroom (no toilets in sight, however). The furthest edge of the room from you is completely dark, while the other is helped by a fire stretching from one long, narrow wall to the other. There is no wood crackling beneath it though, nor is there an actual controlled area for it to burn. Flames simply lick up the bottom of the wall as if commanded by magic. While the rest of your body feels chilly, the warmth of the fire keeps your head warm like a fever.

You lay crumpled up on your knees and hands, staring into the flames with the most bemused expression, wondering what to do now. You’re definitely not intent on travelling to the other side of the room in fear of being met with something sinister you can’t see, but the fire only illuminates so much of the place and there doesn’t seem to be a door in sight. If Seokjin wasn’t here, you doubted this was a place he wanted to be.

Maybe he was torturing you? Intending to keep you in a dark, scary room in order to break your resolve? You didn’t know the extent of power he was allowed to wield but this whole transportation thing was starting to get really annoying. You chance a meek, “Hello?”

Your voice doesn’t echo like you expect it to. It sounds like it’s right up against your face, like you’d spoken into a pillow, the sound eaten as soon as it came from your mouth. Where the hell were you?

“...not exact, okay?!”

You pick up on a voice to your right and turn over with such speed that you land on your ass. Some stones move on the narrow wall, and then the room is illuminated from an entirely different source of light. It takes you a few moments to gather your bearings as your eyes attempt to adjust. Voices are frantic and coming closer, you can hear that much. You pick up on one instantly, “Jungkook.”

Your voice is weak with relief just as he comes into view. He looks an absolute mess as he throws himself at your feet and wraps you up into a bone-crushing hug. The strength of his hug doesn’t even bother you as you cling back with just as much force, grateful tears beginning to gush out of your eyes. You didn’t realize until then just how terrified you’d been, really. It was always there underneath the surface, but something about Jungkook’s sudden presence makes the reality of it all hit much harder. He smells like your shampoo still.

After a couple of minutes in his embrace, you pull away to examine his face, “Are you okay?”

He laughs and the way his tears have clogged up his throat make it sound more like he’s choking, “Who cares about me? Are you?”

You smile, tucking some of his hair behind his ear, “Better. With you here. Where are we?”

“Limbo, hell’s limbo.”

You’re not sure what to say in response to that. After what you’d been through in the last… however long it’d been, that seems the most plausible to you. “Is that like purgatory?”

“No,” another voice speaks from above you and only then do you realize that Yoongi is here too. He looms over the both of you but his gaze is fixed heavy on your face, “purgatory is where the dead go on their way to heaven. This is where the living come on their way to hell. Was a hell of a ride trying to get your ass down here.”

“Yoongi…” You peel back from Jungkook and stand up, a little wobbly as you lean against the wall, “...thank you. How did you do it? The places Seokjin took me… I felt like we were in a dream.”

His upper lip ticks up in a snarl, “It was. The place where you were is a void, heaven’s version of limbo. It’s where angels bargain with humans on the edge of death to repent. It’s an open playing field for angels to present themselves to their humans without them having to be dead or breaking a rule… not like the latter really applies to Seokjin, though. It’s only as strong as your will to be there,” with that, Yoongi reaches toward you and brushes what feels like sand off your cheek, or perhaps he just meant to touch you to make sure you were really here with the way it lingered, “and that’s the only reason I could pull you out.”

It was a lot to digest. You still couldn’t totally understand how he’d pulled you from heaven’s limbo if he was a demon, but that was beside the point. Right now, you just wanted to get out of this creepy box of a room for good. And it seemed you would be getting your wish.

Another figure became clear to you through the doorway, though this figure looked much more intimidating than the two by your side. Dressed immaculately with a sly smile that felt strikingly familiar, a man makes his way into the room, pressing a hand to his chest and bowing his head to you, “He had my help too, of course. A pleasure to meet you (Name), I’ve heard very little about you.” The man holds out a hand to you and you can feel both Jungkook and Yoongi stiffen on either side of you, but neither makes a move to stop him. This had to be another demon, no doubt.

You take his hand and shake it firmly despite your nerves, “T-Thank you for your help as well. May I ask who you are?”

The man grins wider, “You can call me Lucifer. Are you hungry?”

An entire array of human food is set out before you but you don’t have much of a stomach to touch any of it, though Jungkook seems right at home as he fills up his own plate. You can only guess he’s enjoying the hell out of having so much food at his fingertips without having to pay for it.

You can hear his delighted sound effects from the left of you as you both sit on one side of a long table. Lucifer sits at the head of the table to the right of you, also refraining from really eating anything. Yoongi sits right across from you on the other side with an annoyed expression on his face, fingers tapping the heavy oak table top in a rhythm you can’t decipher. It couldn’t be any more awkward.

“No appetite?” Lucifer asks, pointing to the food. There’s meat and vegetables and cheeses that you know and don’t know but none of it seems particularly appetizing to you at the moment.

You shake your head, “No. Actually, I have a few questions I’d like to ask you.”

“Ah, bet you’re bursting.” He chuckles and takes a swig of something you think might be wine. “Go ahead. I’ll try to recap the last couple of days as well as I can.”

“Days?!” You don’t mean to yell, you really don’t (especially not at the king of hell, but-), “It’s been days?”

Jungkook stops chewing to give you a concerned look, “Of course… how long was it for you?”

“Barely… half an hour, maybe more? But not days.”

“Yes, well,” Lucifer sighs, tucking his hands together in front of himself, “time works much differently in heaven and hell than it does here. Especially for those who end up in heavenly limbo. It’s essentially cut off from the rest of the universe which makes it that much harder to track those who end up there. Seokjin was smart in bringing you there than somewhere else on earth.”

Your head is throbbing at this point. If days had gone by, you could only imagine how much had changed since you’d been gone… “So… what has happened since then?”

“Apparently quite a bit, seeing as I was a last resort.” Lucifer’s tone almost sounds irritated. Like a petulant child, he glares over at his son with an unspoken tension that you would like to delve into much, much later when the important things have been moved out of the way. “These boys have been pretty busy trying to get you back. But we are all eager to know what happened while you were with Seokjin.”

Jungkook places a gentle hand on top of your knee under the table. For whatever reason, you note that his grip feels stronger than you’d grown used to. You’d thought the hug was just because he missed you so much, but even this simple touch was- “He… he found me in the dressing room, cornered me there and told me he’d been trying to get me and Jungkook alone. Somewhere he could really do some damage.” You recite all that you readily remembered, some details slipping as you focus on Jungkook’s touch. Yoongi’s eyes never stop boring into you. “He said a lot. He… he said he wanted to give me a second chance.”

Lucifer raises a brow at you, “At…?”

“Life. He said that if I… if I ratted out Jungkook, he’d work things out with God to set my life back on track. Memories wiped, a new guardian angel, the works.” You can feel Jungkook stiffen next to you.

“And did you take him up on it?” Lucifer inquires.

“No! No, I would… I would never. But he was so insistent… It sounded like he really wanted me to say yes. I don’t think he was planning to betray me if I took him up on it either.”

Lucifer heaves a heavy sigh. Folding his hands underneath his chin, the king of hell spares a glance at Jungkook, “He’s got a thing for innocents: those he believes did no actual harm in a situation. He’s always been soft that way. He has more of an affinity for humans than I ever did, but I have more reason to loathe humans than he does, so I guess it’s understandable.”

“He did… mention that none of this was my fault.”

“Of course! You were only following the path life laid out for you. It was the fallen angel you have beside you that decided to shake things up, and aren’t you lucky he did? It doesn’t surprise me one bit that you’re still alive. You’ve done nothing but suffer the consequences, it seems, against your own will.”

“But what about the demon he fell for? Or his child? Weren’t they killed so he could keep his spot in heaven?”

Lucifer leans forward, “I’m assuming your friends haven’t made it known to you yet, but they aren’t dead. They are both very much alive. In fact, the child in question was one of the people that helped in tracking you down. The mother… she is here, in hell, meant to stay imprisoned for all eternity. Or at least until the rapture,” with that, Lucifer drinks again, maintaining eye contact with your shocked stare, “but it was best that no one knew of their whereabouts. Only a handful of people even know that Inhui still exists. It’s become something of a legend amongst the demons and angels, shrouded in confusion. None of the angels would care for the mother, but the child would start an earthly war if they knew one still walked the earth. As far as they’re concerned, the child probably died from the natural complications of being an abomination.”

You frown, “How is that possible? An angel for every human on earth… that’s billions of angels and no one has even noticed the guy?”

“I was wondering about that, actually. He told us that he’d been walking the earth for a while now. Surely someone would have taken notice, right?” Jungkook speaks next, having abandoned his food entirely.

Yoongi snaps out of his bored stance, “Tae’s an anomaly. He’s forgotten everywhere he goes. His impression barely lasts long. Those people he encountered early on considered him a dream, or a hallucination, or a possession of the mind. His actual presence is… hazy. It’s easier to remember him by his name or his number, but everything else is-”

“Intangible.” His father finishes with a flourish. “No ordinary angel or demon could ever put a face to the name, only a feeling. Along with the rather excessive amount of glamours he employs when amongst the public, it is no wonder no one has sounded the alarm. Go ahead and recall his face in your mind, fallen. I’m sure you couldn’t piece it together even if you wanted to.”

Jungkook’s face screws up a little as an attempt, stricken dumb moments later when he can’t utter a thing. Your stomach churns at the thought, soiling your appetite even more.

It seemed like there was more to that story than you were being told, but you imagined that it would be quite a lot to relay to you in more than one sitting. After all, you still had no clue what you’d missed since you’d been gone, and it only hadn’t terrified you senseless because you were at least certain that the biggest threat to everyone’s lives had been right there with you the whole time.

“If you’re not planning to eat anytime soon, is there anything else you’d like to know? It’s not every day a mortal like you gets to talk to Lucifer.” With a small flourishing wave of his hand, Lucifer smiles at you, charming as ever. It was so strange. Yoongi acted nothing like his father, and yet you saw every bit of him in his expression.

You imagined Yoongi felt the need to distance himself as much as he could from his father’s intimidating image and had ended up creating his own in the process. Where Lucifer was inviting, however, Yoongi was… not for everyone. Even as he stares over the table at you, eyes hooded with what appears to be indifference rather than lasciviousness, you can’t help but see the other in him.

“I suppose not,” you murmur, “but now that I have the chance, I don’t really know what to say.”

Lucifer continues to smile, “Don’t fret! I’m sure after the doozy you’ve been in, you’ll need to rest up. You’re more than welcome to stay here until you feel it’s safe to go back topside.”

The thought of treating hell like a hotel to stay in was tickling to say the least. The minute you rise, Jungkook follows suit, nearly knocking his chair over in the process to follow you. “I’d appreciate that. Is there… perhaps a room I could cool down in? Maybe a bathroom?”

Lucifer had deposited both you and Jungkook in a rather nice room, fitted with all the things you’d find in a nice resort room overlooking somewhere like the Bahamas. The dark, brooding colors of Hell follow you even here, and what little light you are allowed in the room comes from fire or mysterious ambience. Still, it’s enough to splash your face with (what you’re definitely sure is) water in the ensuite bathroom.

Jungkook sits at the foot of the bed, watching you, “I missed you.”

Since the moment that the Lord of Hell and his son had left you to your devices, you’d become increasingly aware that something was off about your angel. You had imagined that it had been from the sheer worry he felt over you, but it was starting to feel different from that. Something not so easily explained. If only… if only you could figure it out.

You pat your skin dry and look over at him, measuring him up and down. Appearance wise, he still had the same haircut, same clothes, same shoes. It was the aura that felt different.

Slowly, you approach him from the bathroom and wish that there would be more light in the room to examine him with. In that same moment, what appeared to be a ray of warm light halos above you both, giving you exactly what you had wished for. When Jungkook looks up, he looks… radiant. “I missed you too…” You whisper, reaching out a hand to cup his jaw. At your touch, he shudders, melting into you, and those eyes then laser focus on your own. “Are you okay?”

“I am now.” He answers without hesitation, then turns to kiss your inner palm with such a sensual drag of his lips that you grow hot instantly. The surprise makes you yank your hand away and you swear you hear him whine at the missing contact.

“Y-You just look different.” You squeak, holding the aforementioned hand to your chest as if he’d burned you.

Jungkook’s bushy brows furrow. “Do I?”

When Jungkook had been an angel, he’d had a distinct glow about him that set him apart from others. It was cliche, but it made sense then. You knew that you were dealing with someone from another world. When he’d turned human, he’d felt softer, normal. He didn’t glow in any particular way lest the light hit him through the window just right. But now… that glow was back. In a way that didn’t feel familiar.

You reach your hand out again, but this time you let it wander. You push his fringe back from his forehead, then behind his ear, then down his neck to where a sweatshirt hides his collarbones. In a daze, you fall to your knees before his seated frame and push the fabric back some. You find… nothing. You don’t even know what you’re looking for. A vampire bite? What is so different?

Your hand starts to fall mindlessly as you wrack your brain, but it’s all for naught when Jungkook catches hold of it and intertwines his fingers with yours. His grip is warm and solid. But it’s still- “I thought he’d hurt you.”

You look back up into Jungkook’s eyes as he now leans over you with an intense stare. His hair curls around his cheekbones and twists away from his face at the nape, each strand fluttering as he inches closer until the longest ones are touching your face. “Not much. He healed what he did anyway.”

At that, your angel’s eyes narrow in their scan over you, “What did he do?”

You instinctively swallow. Perhaps because you remember the feeling. Perhaps because Jungkook looks like he could kill. “He… he had to get me to limbo. He had to…” You touch the skin of your throat the same moment you break eye contact, feeling the ghost of Seokjin’s fingers there. It wasn’t so long ago that it had happened after all. You could honestly still feel it.

The silence grows until it’s nearly unbearable, you eventually finding that Jungkook will say nothing while you continue to avoid his gaze. Against your better judgement, you chance a look up at him.

You don’t get very long to look. Jungkook takes both sides of your face and lunges forward like a man possessed and you are forced to follow. In your surprise, you stumble back onto your elbows and Jungkook slots himself between your legs, latching onto your lips in a searing kiss. It’s hot and fast and immature, the kiss of a person who has never kissed before and may never get the chance to kiss again. Youngho had never kissed you like this.

A gentle whimper escapes your mouth but Jungkook inhales it into his own. You feel something primal burn inside you when Jungkook growls out, crouching over you now like a predator cornering his prey, and he’s practically consuming you when you start to kiss back. Can you blame yourself? You easily fold into the feeling because it’s Jungkook and goddamn if you hadn’t wanted to kiss him badly before.

His inexperience does very little to dissuade from how good it feels too, and as you start to take over to guide him, he is all too eager to feel your reciprocated passion. The heady feeling he gives you in his sudden attack pushes all thoughts of Seokjin or the last few days out of your mind like a fast-acting asprin. All you can think of now is how tightly coiled you’d been and how Jungkook is loosening you up one press of his lips at a time.

He lays you on your back and you happily oblige, no cushioning found on the hard floor but you couldn’t care less. Jungkook is careful not to be too rough, aware of your needs as much as his own, and it’s jarringly sweet the way he cradles the back of your head to keep you from hitting it on your descent.

When he’s had enough of your lips (as if he could ever), he starts attacking your neck. He’s lapping at your skin and biting away as if he’s trying to remove all traces of Seokjin’s hands… as if he’s replacing the feeling with him and him only. “I’ll kill him,” Jungkook whispers, a foreign fury in his voice that makes your haze disappear in an instant while he continues to work at your neck, “I’ll kill him for ever touching you.”

Your hand shoots to his hair, feeling your heart beat faster from more than just the kisses, “Kook-” But any attempt at sobering up washes away when, to your surprise, he ruts against you. Youngho had never been that good at using his hips like that either. There was something definitely off with Jungkook.

As much as it pains you, you grab at his hair and yank back, ignoring (or trying to) the filthy groan that he gives in response before peeling away from your skin. You gasp for breath, absolutely winded, “What is going on?”

Jungkook pants past wet lips, “What do you mean-”

“Did Yoongi do this to you?” The sudden heated moment is over when you say that.

Jungkook’s blood has run cold. You have a very strong, haunting feeling that your mounting suspicions have proven correct. His eyes… as gentle as they always were when they looked at you, told you everything. He was not the same Jungkook you’d come to know. Something had happened to him. Something irreversible. You touch his face again and this time Jungkook does not move to embrace it. He looks like he’d rather be anywhere else in the world. “Why?”

In an attempt to escape your pitiful gaze, Jungkook’s eyes flutter shut, cutting you off from seeing him vulnerable any longer. It breaks your heart the longer he stays silent. There’s no denying it now.

A tear of his touches the palm of your hand instead of his lips this time, “How else could I protect you?” He chokes, weak, “I’m not your angel anymore. I can’t be like you. This is the only way... the only way I could stand to look you in the eyes again.”

#majwrites #jungkook scenarios #jungkook imagines #jungkook au #angel!jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts au #yoongi scenarios #yoongi imagines #yoongi au #demon!yoongi #min yoongi #bts #jungkook angst #yoongi angst #angel bts #demon bts

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sapphireplums · 4 years

Text

You’re Not Alone

Description: Y/N Barber the twin sister of Jacob Barber decided to go for a jog one day, but who knew her whole life can change in matters of seconds.

Warnings: angst, language, sexual assault -DON'T READ IF YOU’RE NOT COMFORTABLE

Pairing: Andy Barber x Daughter!Reader Jacob Barber x Sister!Reader

A/N: if any of you guys have ever been assaulted in any type of way, i'm so sorry that has happened to you. you guys are all beautiful and strong human beings. if anyone wants to talk my inbox is open :)

While reading this, listen to lovely by billie eilish. it really sets the mood for the story.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN BABES

A second. It only took seconds for you to not pick up your phone call from your brother. It was one of those moments where you did not to pick up the phone because you were distracted. But because of that, it almost cost you your life.

THREE HOURS BEFORE THE ASSAULT

♧

You and your older twin brother Jacob were walking home from school arguing about what dog is cuter. You know, the ususal twin stuff.

“No, Jake, German Shepherds are the cutest dog out.” You said with confidence.

“No, Y/N, Corgi’s are the cutest obviously.” Your twin brother kept saying. “ And I'm obviously right because I'm older than you by 49 seconds.”

He always used the ‘older twin’ card on you.

The argument lasted about a few minutes until you guys just gave up and agreed that they were both cute. However, in your mind , you kept saying German Shepherds were better.

“I’m hungry Jake. What do you think we’re going to have for dinner tonight?” You said as your stomach was rumbling.

“ You thinking what I’m thinking?” Jacob said with a smirk knowing that your twin telepathy was tingling.

“Ohhh yessss.” Then you both shouted at the same time:

“KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN.”

When you guys got home, you saw your mom on the couch typing something on her laptop.

“Hey kids, how was school today?” Laurie said looking up from her laptop.

“It was good mom” You said and you gave Jacob the look basically saying ‘tell mom we want kfc’

Jacob groaned. “Mom can we get kfc for dinner? Me and Y/N have been craving it for a while”

“Is that your guys’ twin thingy where you want the same thing and think the same thing?” Laurie said smiling at the thought of how her kids got along so well and had a strong sibling bond.

“ Yes mom, yes it is.” you said as chips were being stuffed into your mouth. “But can we actually get kfc though? Jake and I have been craving it for a while.”

“Sure you guys, I’ll pick it up around the time you dad will come home”

“Thanks Mom.” You both said at the same time.

Going up to your guys’ room, Jacob turned on his video games while you were watching YouTube.

He was talking to his gaming friend through the earpiece yelling words at him and the tv.

You just rolled your eyes and smiled slightly at your brothers actions. Closing your laptop, you looked outside the window and saw that it was a nice day, so you asked Jacob if he wanted to take a jog with you.

“ Hey Jake, do you want to take a jog with me? It’s really nice outside right now.”

“ Sorry, maybe not this time sis. I’m really into this game.” Jacob said making you frown slightly.

“It’s okay Jake maybe next time.” Jacob turned his head towards you and smiled in agreeance.

You got ready and then tied your shoes when you were near the door.

“Mom, I’m going for a jog!” You yelled as you finished tying your shoes.

“Okay honey be home before dinner.” Your mom said as she was washing the dishes.

Running around the block, you took in the fresh air of the moisture that was in the air. Living in Massachusetts also meant wet weather which you loved. Summer wasn't really your favorite season but it was Jacobs. Being twins doesn’t mean you all like the same thing.

You and Jacob had the best sibling relationship not because you were twins, but that you just bonded in general. There is nothing he wouldn’t do for you and you thought the same.

Getting tired from the constant running, you decided to take a walking break and scroll through Instagram. As you were scrolling, your screen lit up with your dads contact picture. It was the two of you on a fishing trip making funny faces.

“Hey dad how’s work?” You asked slightly out of breath due to the running.

“ Hey Sweetheart, after work I’m going to go to the grocery store and get those cookies you really like and I was thinking you and I can have a movie night?”

“Dad, you know I’m always up for movie night” you chuckled. “What about Jake and mom?”

“Mom texted me saying that she was going to go shopping for swim trunks or something and Jake is going too so it's just going to be you and me.”

“Okay dad, sounds good to me can’t wai-”

“I’m sorry honey I have to go back now, I’ll see you at home. I love you.”

“I love you too dad.” He hung up the phone rather quickly but you didn’t think much of it because you were going to see him at home anyways

Well so you thought. You thought you were going to be home at your normal time. Thinking that it would just be another normal day, but it would be far from that.

After the short walking break and talking to your dad, you decided to start your jogging again. Jogging was one of the activities you liked to do after a long day to release the stress that was contained in you. Sometimes you would go with Jacob but today he didn’t feel like it.

Imagine if you just stayed on call a little longer with your dad or if Jacob went with you. Everything would be different. Every decision you make on a day to day basis affects your life.

When jogging, up ahead you saw a man drop a box full of what looked like children's toys like dolls and race cars. Being the nice person you were, You approached the man and helped him pick up the toys.

Oh what a big mistake.

“Oh, sir, let me help you with that,” you said bending down picking up the toys that were on the ground.

“Thank you so much, darling,” the man said with a somewhat creepy smile, but you brushed it off.

Your phone started to buzz and you saw your screen light up with Jacob’s face, but you ignored it as you were still helping the man. You were thinking of just calling Jacob back later when you had the chance.

If you had the chance.

After helping the man, he stated his thanks to you.

“Thank you again, honey,” you really started to get freaked out by this man especially since he was calling you these names.

You gave him a nervous smile. “ You’re welcome, but I should get going now,” you said but before you could turn around and go back home, the man grabbed your wrist tightly, preventing you from going anywhere.

“You are right where I want you sweetheart”

Before you could scream, he covered your mouth with a wet towel. The smell was really bad. Next thing you know, you’re knocked out like a light switch.

♧

You woke up with a pounding headache. Trying to flutter your eyes open, you noticed you were in the backseat of a van. The next thing you saw made you panic. Your hands tied with your feet attached to them making it look like a fetus position.

Before you could try and do anything, the man opened the doors to the van, revealing a wicked grin. Your eyes grew wide when he started to grow closer to you with duct tape.

“Shhh don’t worry love I won't take long.”

You were confused what he meant by that. What did he mean he won’t take long?

That’s when it hit you like a truck. You were about to get raped.

He started to put his hands around your breasts, trailing it up to your cheeks. He held your cheeks and stared into your eyes intently. This is when the tears started to come out. You couldn’t say anything since your mouth was duct taped, but you tried to move frantically though it didn’t do anything.

He started to take down his pants and he basically ripped your leggings in half.

Why did this have to happen? You were only being a good person, helping a man, and this is what happens in return.

DURING THE SAME TIME AT HOME

♧

Jacob was starting to get worried and anxious. It’s been over an hour and you wouldn’t answer your phone. He probably called you literally a hundred times but still no answer. He asked your mom to call you to see if you would answer.

It went straight to voicemail.

Jacob started to panic even more. He decided to call your guys’ dad to see if he knows where you were.

The line started to ring. Then he picked up.

“Hey Jake, I was wondering if-” he was cut off by Jacob frantically asking him if he knew where you were.

“Dad! Did Y/N ever call you or anything?” Jacob frantically said to his father.

“ I talked to her about a couple hours ago, is everything alright?

“I-I don’t know dad. She didn’t come home after her jog and I’m getting a really bad twin vibe”

“Shit, okay Jake, I’ll be home as soon as I can.” With that Jacob hung up the phone.

“God Y/N/N, I hope you’re okay” Jacob said with tears on the verge of coming out.

When you woke up, you noticed that the familiar smell around your mouth. The man must have knocked you out. A burning pain was prominent in the lower half of your body. Everything started to come together. With your ripped pants and the bruises all over your body, you pieced everything together.

You were raped.

All of the thoughts in your head, you didn’t even notice that you were not in the van anymore, no, you were at a park.

This park was all too familiar. It was the park you and Jacob loved when you were kids. You got up but fell back down due to the agonizing pain.

The pain was unbearable. Tears threatening to come out of your eyes when you wanted to forget what happened.

But you couldn’t forget.

You laid there on the cold cement floor.

♧

The Barbers were in panic when they couldn’t find you. They had called the cops after being gone for six hours.

The police didn’t find you yet and frankly, they were doing a lousy job at it.

“Fuck it, I’m going to go for a drive and see if I find her” Andy said while stomping towards the front door.

“I’m coming with you.” Jacob said without question.

His baby sister was missing, he couldn’t just stay home and do nothing. Andy shook his head.

“No, Jake you need to stay here with your mother.” Before Jacob could object, a officer wanted to question him maybe knowing where you could be.

Andy drove around the neighborhood first, but no luck. He drove about another couple blocks where he stumbled upon a park. He knew the park. It was you and Jacob’s favorite park.

He slowly drove past the park to see if there was any luck. At this point, Andy almost gave up and went back home until he saw something.

Andy’s eyes widened with fear and joy when he saw you, his baby girl, at the park. But his smile fell when he saw you laying on the ground.

What if you were dead? Andy thought to himself

“ Oh my God, Y/N!!!” Andy basically sprinted towards you.

You could barely get out the words since your throat was sore from crying so much.

“Daddy?!” You said weakly with tears on your cheeks and your eyes bloodshot from the crying.

“Y/N what happened?”

But before you could answer, he saw your ripped pants, bruises on your body and the blood coming out near your legs.

“Oh my God, Y/N please tell me you weren’t raped?” Andy said with sadness but also extreme anger knowing that there was a bastard out there who possibly touched you.

You could barely get out the words but all you said was “ I was d-daddy.”

Andy was furious at this point his worst nightmare came true.

“ Y/N I’m so sorry. If only I stayed on the phone with you a little longer I could have-” You interrupted your father knowing this wasn’t his fault.

“Dad, this was not your fault.”

Andy still looked at you with sad eyes, but despite what happened to you, he was just happy that you were alive.

“Come on baby let's go home” Andy said while carrying you bridal style.

“ I’m so sorry dad. I was just helping this one guy and-and he-”

You started to stumble on your words but your dad stopped you.

“ No no baby you don’t have to say anything now. But know Duffy might ask you some questions so we can catch the guy okay?”

You just nodded at your dads words not wanting to say anything.

♧

On the drive home Andy heard you sniffling he reassured you with comforting words.

“Honey, it’s okay, you’re safe now nobody is going to hurt you now.”

You thought back to when Jacob was calling you. “ You know Jake called me when I was helping that man,” you started. “ If only I answered his call this probably wouldn-”

You were cut off by your father. “Y/F/N do not say that. None of this was your fault it was that son of a bitches fault”

You were taken aback when your dad cussed and then you chuckled softly. “Woah dad, I didn’t know you tolerated that type of language”

Andy just laughed, but before you could say anything else, you noticed you were home.

Jacob and Laurie were outside talking to police officers, but they turned around and saw you in the car.

Jacob eyes widened and was the first to run towards you and give you a hug. When he broke the hug, he looked at you and saw your bruises which made him fume with anger, but he would worry about that later. He was just happy you were home.

“Y/N oh my god are you okay?!” you just nod your head.

You went to give Laurie a hug which lasted short when a voice spoke up.

“ Hi Y/N, I’m detective Duffy, I work with your father and I’m sorry to ask you this but we need to question you while your mind is fresh.”

“Duffy can’t this wait until later we just found her.” Andy said while looking back at his daughter.

“No dad it’s okay I’ll be fine.” Jacob gave you sad eyes of sympathy, but you gave him a reassuring smile.

♧

“So Y/N, tell me from the start of what happened?” Your family was there to support you. You wanted them to be there.

You started from the beginning with the jog, the man dropping the toys, the chloroform, the van, the pain in your lower area, everything.

Laurie just cried into Andy’s shoulders while his fists were clenched white. He was so angry. No, not at you, but at the fact that he couldn’t protect you.

Jacob held your hand the entire time while you told Duffy what happened. He was angry that he didn’t go on the jog with you. He was mad that he couldn’t protect his baby sister.

“Im so sorry this has happened to you Y/N, you should have not gone through that. We will find the man and he will be punished for his crimes.”

You nodded and smiled slightly at Duffy.

♧

After all the cops left, you didn’t know what to do. You were still traumatized.

Your head was resting on Andy’s lap and your legs were on Jacobs. You were dozing off, but you were scared to sleep or eve close your eyes.

Everytime you closed your eyes, you just saw the man. Jacob seemed to notice this because you flinched a little.

He rubbed your leg with reassurance telling you that you’re okay now.

“ Y/N you can finally sleep now. We’re here for you, you don't have to worry about anything.” Jacob said to you

That's when everything broke. You couldn’t handle it anymore tears and sobs were everywhere.

Your family all gave you a hug with love evident in it. This is when you finally knew you were safe.

You then spoke up while drying your tears. “Can we still get KFC?” you said with a smile. Everyone just laughed and that’s when you finally knew you had a loving family and you couldn’t be anymore thankful than that.

♧

A/N :OMGGg I cried writing some of this ahhhh. I might make a part 2 depending if I get any ideas and if this doesn’t flop.

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duchessfics · 4 years

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Birthday Headcanons!

So my birthday was technically May 23...which is over a month ago 🙈 but for my birthday I wanted to type these headcanons up. Honestly each of these have no real connection to each other except I’ve just thought of them over time, but I just thought these would be fun to read. So I hope you enjoy them as much as I have when writing these up! 😁

Billie Dean Howard

This filming trip has been a nightmare for Billie. She hardly got any content for her show, her rental car broke down while driving back to the hotel after a whole night of filming, and the next day rather than calling the rental car company, her assistant calls some local mom and pop garage to fix it.

So rather than taking the risk of having her assistant screw something else up, Billie goes to the garage herself. And she is sure that the mechanic will charge her more since she’s both a celebrity and a single woman with no one to back her up.

When the medium gets there the garage is completely devoid of any other people and the only sign of someone here is the radio blasting from the garage. So, after seeing absolutely no one for five minutes, she decides to just walk into the working area fully annoyed at the terrible service.

Fortunately, she hears the man whistling to the music and struts over to see him working underneath the car. However, Billie interrupts his moment, loudly clearing her throat and saying excuse me in the snippiest tone she can muster. That makes him stop whistling and roll out from under the car.

But Billie is shocked that this mechanic is no man. Oh no, you are a gorgeous woman even with smears of grease and dirt on your face and clothes. And this is the moment Billie realizes the appeal of butches.

When you roll out from under the car you assume this gorgeous woman is Billie judging by her fancy appearance and get up to introduce yourself. However, as you reach out to shake her hand you remember how dirty you are and back up, so you don’t get something on her clothes.

While Billie was filled with anger just minutes ago at her car being fixed, now she’s both surprised and unexpectedly aroused. You turn down the radio, knowing it’s obnoxiously loud and tell her you contacted the rental car company and they’re covering the cost of repairs, but you won’t be able to finish tonight so she’ll have to wait until tomorrow to drive the repaired car.

Then you throw out the offer in your own desire to see her that you have a spare room if her hotel reservation doesn’t have an extra night. Before you can even finish your sentence, Billie says yes and you would be lying if you denied your own joy at that.

So you tell her you’ll be done in a couple hours and ask if she wants to be dropped off somewhere while you work. But Billie says no. So you set out a clean chair for her to sit in before going back to work.

As you work you ask Billie what she’s doing in a small town like this. So she tells you about her TV show and when you find out she’s a medium you ask about it. At first Billie is hesitant to keep talking, but you assure her you love hearing her talk about her career.

So she tells you about everything—from her career to her checkered past and future desires. And in the process, she ends up sharing things about her life she’s never told anyone. But for some reason she just trusts you and doesn’t feel condemned or judged because of what she says.

The two hours fly by, but you’ve made substantial progress and tell Billie she should be able to head back home before noon tomorrow. However, after meeting you she is not so eager to leave anymore.

When wrapping up your work, you go through closing the garage and Billie observes you the whole time. You notice her checking you out as you walk around and work, but don’t mind. In fact you can’t help but check her too.

Then you lead her out to your old pickup truck and quickly clean out the passenger side while apologizing for your messy car. But she doesn’t seem bothered. She’s too occupied with you to notice anything else.

As you drive home, you ask if she minds music and Billie says no. So you turn on the radio to a classic rock station. Then you absentmindedly start to sing along and Billie nearly swoons at the whole thing. No one has ever had this effect on her before. She’s supposed to be the one who makes others swoon. Not the other way around…But she likes it.

When you get to your home you coyly explain you need to take a shower before making dinner. But you mention that you don’t mind if she joins. Let’s just say...Billie jumps on the opportunity (and you) and even though she wasn’t that dirty, Billie takes special joy in washing you off and massaging away any tension or soreness you have.

After taking a shower that’s long enough for the water to run cold, you both step out and since Billie doesn’t have extra clothes you offer one of your old, oversized Harley Davison shirts to wear. Seeing her only wearing your shirt that falls about mid-thigh on her does things to you and when she sees you so effected she starts to get bold in her flirting too.

In the end you warm up some cheap, frozen meal that’s nothing fancy, but the whole time you’re getting it together, Billie is wrapped around you, hugging you from behind or your side earning the nickname “spider monkey.” When you actually sit to eat both of you watch the other closely with shared grins and small giggles. Then cleaning up is super easy with Billie’s help and you head over to your living room.

You sit in your recliner as usual and Billie pauses for a moment looking between you and the couch. But her eyes linger on you longer and seeing the debate in her head leads you to hold out your hand toward her, offering a solution. She takes it with a smile and you guide her to sit on your lap.

Once again she’s used to being the caretaker, but is glad to let someone else take the lead and easily cuddles into you as the tv plays. And although now words are spoken, the way you hold her in a warm embrace makes Billie no longer regret this trip. In fact, she may stay a couple more days if it means being with you.

Lana Winters

While you and Lana can’t get married or have an official wedding in the 1970s, you solidify your relationship by buying a house together.

It’s an old, cottage-like home without any prying neighbors around to spy on you both. When you first enter the home, in your excitement you pick Lana up and carry her bridal style across the threshold for the first time.

While you have the keys to the house, there’s still a lot of work to do to the point that it’s not livable yet. So you and Lana take the time to look around the home deciding how to decorate and design your home. Then you begin to clean the house.

Both of you work hard on dusting, vacuuming, and wiping down every surface in your home leaving you both sore. Luckily when you return to the apartment you currently live in both of you take a nice hot bath to soothe your sore muscles. And it’s good to just spend time relaxing together.

Once you finish cleaning, you work on painting and decorating each room with different vibrant colors. Fortunately, Lana brings her radio so you can both listen to music while painting. But it’s still exhausting work and leaves you crabby sometimes if you go too long without a break.

So when Lana notices you starting to look worn out or tired, she’ll set down her paint-roller before guiding you to set yours down. Then she’ll pull you into a spontaneous dance. Sometimes it’s slow and relaxed, and other times the music is fun and upbeat. Either way it does help you to feel better.

Even though both of you aren’t conventionally attractive at the moment, you have never felt more attracted to Lana with her barefaced, thoroughly worn overalls with paint speckled on them, and a simple ponytail. And she loves seeing you like this too, finding something about simple domesticity to be beautiful.

The day you and Lana are finished painting, you start to pack up all of your belongings and slowly move them over to the house. It takes 5 trips between the places and even then you have the unfortunate realization that your mattress won’t fit into your car. So after wrestling with the bed for over an hour to no avail, you both are spent and give up.

Thankfully, Lana is a literal angel and when she sees you on the verge of tears, she runs out to bring home food from your favorite diner. And as she enters with the food you nearly cry in happiness. Then you eat your first meal on the floor since your table is covered in boxes.

After dinner before you can even ask, Lana guides you to climb into her lap and holds you close to her while you both take a moment to rest and listen to the radio. Even though you still have to set up your home it’s such a good feeling having everything here...well almost everything.

Because you couldn’t bring the bed over, you’re stuck with figuring out another option. So you unpack your blankets and pillows before laying them out on your carpeted floor in the living room.

Then you and Lana take a shower to unwind from the day and change into your pajamas. And even though it isn’t quite dark yet you slide under the covers and cuddle into each other, completely exhausted.

Once you’re settled you are finally able to hear the outside noises and it’s so different compared to ambient city sounds and you’ve never stayed out in the countryside before. So with each animal sound or gust of wind you perk up and grip on her while whisper asking if Lana heard it too.

She chuckles at your reaction and soothes that you’re safe with her. And to give you a small distraction from the eerie silence you talk about future house plans and keep softly talking until you both naturally fall asleep.

While you’re on the floor and it’s nowhere near as comfortable as your bed, you both sleep like rocks from working hard all day and end up getting more than 8 hours of sleep with no nightmares to haunt Lana’s dreams.

The next morning you wake up to the sun shining in your eyes and Lana lazily rubbing your back as you rest on her chest. All of the sounds, smells, and sights around you are almost mystical compared to the city. But you can definitely get used to this.

You ask if you’re preventing her from getting up, but she says no and holds you closer while you both talk about different things, enjoying the unfamiliar, but pleasant feeling of the cool morning air and environment.

Eventually you do get up to make breakfast and while you’re on pancake flipping duty, Lana rummages around to find the coffee maker to make some. Fortunately, she finds it and brews some for both of you to drink.

You eat your breakfast on the floor like last night before slowly beginning to unpack the boxes and setting up your home. And by the evening you are able to eat dinner at your table. Also, you somehow managed to finagle your bed into the car and set it up to sleep in for tonight.

Tonight both of you are much less tired so when you head to bed and Lana mentions that you haven’t technically christened the home yet. You are more than happy to make love in your new home for the first time without having to hold back or be quiet since there aren’t neighbors around.

(https://duchessfics.tumblr.com/post/617775020854345728/gaia-ki-cordelia-saying-i-love-you-to-misty)

Cordelia Goode

Is Cordelia the supreme? Yes. Did her wisdom teeth still grow in for some reason? Also, yes. Because they’re starting to cause problems, she visits the dentist and they recommend getting them removed. The only thing is she needs someone to drive her and take care of her while she heals but she doesn’t want to make a big deal out of it.

Mallory is busy with Coco, Zoe with Madison, Misty is off with Stevie god knows where, and Queenie knows of your crush for the supreme even if you won’t admit it. She’s seen you two tip toe around the topic and decides to volunteer you for the job so you’ll finally admit your feelings for her.

Honestly if Cordelia trusted anyone to take care of her it would be you. On the way to the dentist she’s eerily quiet. But even as the supreme, Cordelia is still human and feels anxious about the surgery. And in the car ride she drinks a tea she personally concocted with specific leaves to help wane her immunity as the supreme. It’s not that her powers are lost, they’re just dulled enough for the anesthesia to work.

By the time you’re at the office, her supremely glow is gone and to you she almost looks physically different. But you know the tea worked so both of you walk in and you keep on high alert for any possible threat towards your supreme.

Shortly after signing in they call Cordelia back to begin the process. You automatically stand up to go with her, but pause to ask if she even wants that. Before you can even finish your sentence, she takes your hand to keep you close.

Cordelia continues to hold your hand while she sits in the patient’s chair and the dentist explains what’s going to happen. And when they ask if she has any follow up questions, she’s too nervous to think of any, but you ask about a couple things that she’s grateful you think of.

Then they say they’ll get her ready for the removal. So you wish her luck trying to sound calm, but walk out to the waiting room feeling anxious as well. Within an hour the dentist comes out to you and says everything went well and she’s slowly waking up. So they let you go to her and tell you to take your time getting her up.

When you walk in and see your supreme reclined on the patient’s chair, she looks high as a kite. And your appearance makes her mumble something about her girlfriend. That catches your attention and you hesitantly ask who she’s talking about.

The question makes her have a fit of laughter however she groans in pain so you rush up to her to settle her back down. Then she clings to your hand and says with her mouth full of gauze that you’re her girlfriend because she loves you.

Or in her words she “loves you so, so, so, so, infinitely so’s y/n. Wait infinity loves. I loves infinity--wait I love infinitely. Y/n—fuck—I love you infinitely, infinity x infinity.” And you can’t help but giggle at your supreme confessing her love so clumsily.

But you quickly regret that when she begins to cry thinking you’re making fun of her. Before she gets too worked up you kneel before her and apologize saying you weren’t trying to make fun of her. You just thought she was cute.

For some reason those words provoke her to try to sit up before standing up, but you snap into action and keep her from doing so, unsure if she even could stay standing at the moment. In response she tries to resist while growling with her mouth full of gauze that she’s the fucking supreme. And before she gets upset enough to trigger her powers you assure her that you know she’s the supreme and ask once she’s resettled ask how she feels.

That leads her to relax and tell you how she’s feeling. But as she does instead of using normal pet names towards you like “sweetheart” or “darling” she keeps calling you poptart and cheese-it. Both of which she never even eats.

Fortunately one of the dental assistants brings in the take home kit with instructions. Then you help Cordelia up and slowly make your way home. But it takes everything in you to not laugh at her behavior.

When you get back to the house, you manage to sneak Cordelia to her room without running into anyone and by the time you coax her to gargle saltwater, take pain meds, and change her gauze she’s completely exhausted and you are too. So you prop her up so she doesn’t hurt her mouth when she sleeps before laying beside her on the bed. And the last thing she says is, “Love you, pop tart.” before you both fall asleep.

By the time you wake up to give Cordelia the second dose of pain medicine she already has her supremely glow back and is way more recovered than the average person. But you still. Help and feed her a small meal to prevent nausea. Then you help her gargle saltwater and replace the gauze and she passes out again.

24 hours later Cordelia is almost completely healed and takes care of herself. However she never mentions anything about what she said and doesn’t act differently whatsoever. You try to as well, but you just can’t forget her words. So you go to Zoe and explain what happened. She encourages you to be honest with the supreme and see how she responds. Then she assures you that Cordelia won’t be upset. If anything she has a soft spot for you.

That afternoon when you see Cordelia alone in the greenhouse you come out and hesitantly explain what she said the other day, but you also recognize that it was the anesthesia talking. While she didn’t remember that, she does admit she has feelings for you, and you admit you have feelings for her. So you decide to try going out on a date and she promises you that she won’t call you ‘pop tart.’ again.

(https://stoneharts.tumblr.com/post/101329124928/bette-being-a-cutie-pie-in-4x04-edward-mordrake)

Bette and Dot Tattler

When you find out Bette and Dot have never been to the beach before you’re shocked because they live in Florida. But you also make a point to take them to one.

One day you wake them up while it’s dark and have them get dressed before leading them to your packed car. You know they aren’t big fans of surprises so when they sleepily what’s happening you say you’re going to the beach.

When Bette and Dot find out they’re both excited and nervous about sneaking out. But you assure them it’s a day off for everyone and you told Eve what you’re doing so she could explain where you are if anyone asks. So they happily get into your car.

You drive to a virtually private beach and lay out a blanket on the sand. Then the 3 of you sit together to watch the sunrise. For now you sit beside Dot and hold her hand, smiling as you hear their gasps of amazement.

Once the sun is fully risen you tell them to stay put and go back to the car. Then you bring back a breakfast you packed to share with them. Bette and Dot knew you loved them both, but they are still shocked at how thoughtful and considerate you are unlike nearly everyone else in their lives.

By the time you finish eating it’s fully light out so you can really see the full expanse of the Atlantic Ocean now. You offer to take them closer honestly Bette and Dot haven’t swam in years and have never been to a body of water large enough that you can’t see the other side. So, they’re a little apprehensive.

You promise to stay with them the whole time and hold Bette’s hand as you murmur soothing words over the roar of the ocean and guide them closer.

When you get to the damp sand where waves briefly touch enough to change the texture, both Bette and Dot freeze up and won’t move. So you try to comfort them by saying you’ll step up first. Then you let go of Bette’s hand and walk only a couple steps away.

Both sets of eyes watch the waves rush over your feet and you assure them with a smile you’re ok and they will be too. Then you hold out your hands and beckon them closer. They cautiously step closer into the soaked and more shifty sand and Bette takes one of your hands while Dot takes the other.

When the water rushes over their feet they gasp and back up a little at the cold temperature. But you slowly guide them back and soothe it won’t be as cold this time.

They’re skeptical, but when the next wave comes and flows over all of your feet Bette and Dot don’t back away like last time. And when you ask if they’re ok and they say yes with cute little grins on their faces.

After a couple more waves all three of you walk back to your stuff and both women comment about the sand that gets stuck on their wet feet. So you pamper Bette and Dot by wiping their feet clean with a towel when you sit back on the blanket.

When it gets to mid-morning you pull out the matching sun hats you bought for them so they have some protection from the sun. Then the three of you go between lounging on the blanket and going to dip your feet in the water.

Eventually you bring out the lunch you packed and enjoy the meal of different sandwiches, fruit, and of course Bette’s favorite—cupcakes. And as the 3 of you eat and giggle with each other you notice how happy they look.

After you return the picnic basket to the car, you lead Bette and Dot back to the ocean. But this time you urge them a little further into the water. Unfortunately, there isn’t a swimsuit for them to wear and the only thing they have to wear is their dress. So you keep yours on too and keep them steady whenever the waves come.

Because they can’t really swim that well you only go out until the water meets your knees and hug them close while softly encouraging them, knowing how nervous they are. Thankfully the water is calmer today so you help them to lower into the water and they get excited that they look ‘normal’ because the water is high enough to make their heads look separate from each other.

You understand their joy about for once in their lives not looking like freaks, but also assure them that you love them both just as they are. Bette and Dot will always be your girls. Then you help them stand back up and lead them back to your spot before setting up an umbrella to block out some of the afternoon sun.

Then you lay out on the blanket and hold your lovers close to your chest while you dry off. The warmth of the sun feels like a blanket in itself and you end up falling asleep.

When you wake back up, you panic at Bette and Dot being nowhere near you assuming the worst. But the wind carries their laughter and you look to see them standing by the water and they have their ankles submerged. So you walk over and see they look so happy with slightly burned pink noses and cheeks from the sun. Even Dot looks unusually happy.

Then the sisters thank you for taking them and making the day so special. And you assure both women you’re more than happy to do that for them before giving each woman a kiss. And while you need to head back to the freak show you promise to bring them back to the beach again.

Sally McKenna

After walking in to see your partner cheating on you in your own home you run off devastated. That’s how you end up stumbling into the Hotel Cortez, barely holding yourself together.

The first thing you do is tearfully check into the hotel and that’s when Sally notices you from the balcony. And after getting your room key you stumble up to the bar where Sally sits. But you don’t even notice her, lost in your own emotional state.

After ordering a drink you find yourself hiding your face and trying to be quiet when you cry and drink. But it’s clear to anyone around that you are miserable.

So Sally meanders over, preying on your vulnerable state, and claiming you as her next victim to kill. When she greets you and mentions your crying, you completely break down while explaining that you caught your partner having sex with someone else.

Then you mention how everyone always ends up leaving you behind in the end. Sally is caught off guard by the comment since she’s usually the one to say that. But she just assumes you’re trying to trick her only to take advantage of Sally with your tears. So she keeps buying you drinks to dull your senses and kill you.

Once you seem drunk enough Sally tells you she has an idea “to keep you distracted.” Of course she meant that in a seductive way. But her sultry, suggestive tone goes completely over your head and you say sure before leading her to your hotel room.

When you enter the room you ask if she’s ever seen your favorite childhood movie. The random question throws Sally off but she answers no, already working on removing her coat and deciding on how to kill you.

Luckily with the freshly renovated hotel the TVs include streaming services, so you fall/hop onto the bed while excitedly telling her it’s on Netflix. Sally stops undressing when she sees you using the remote to find it and asks if you are seriously going to watch a dumb kids movie.

Her harsh tone makes you get emotional again and you pathetically whimper that you really like the movie, but you won’t make her stay and watch, knowing it’s lame. And something about your genuinely broken spirit makes her pause.

Then she hesitantly says she’ll watch it, hoping you’ll pass out soon and killing you will be a lot easier. So you pat the bed inviting her closer and she slowly comes forward, shocked at how easily you let her in. But this isn’t Sally’s first rodeo and you’re not going to trick her that easily.

Throughout the movie you scoot closer to Sally and when your flesh touches hers she starts to feel something other than the empty and lonely feeling of death. There’s not a word she can think of to describe it, but it’s a warm comforting feeling. Almost like a hug. However she credits that to the alcohol so she doesn’t fall for you.

After the movie you tell Sally you’re going to order room service and ask what she would like. The blonde is once again taken aback at your consideration of her, but says she doesn’t want anything, starting to get annoyed at how kind you’re being to her.

So you order something for yourself and as you eat you ask about Sally and her past. However she snaps at you, saying you don’t really care or even if you do you’ll leave her when you learn she’s a monster. That’s when you notice fresh tears streaming down her face.

But you assure her that you’re not asking to be judgmental, just to care. So even though Sally doesn’t divulge everything, she does tell you some small parts of her past, anticipating your repulsion or disgust. However you do the opposite, pulling her into a hug and thanking her for trusting you enough to share.

By now Sally lets is more shocked than upset at your acceptance and you see her smile for the first time. Then you ask if she’ll stay for one more movie and she doesn’t hesitate to agree. This time while the movie plays you lean against her and without speaking she wraps her arms around you.

When tucked in Sally’s embrace you don’t feel her cold, dead aura whatsoever and snuggle into her further. In the process she is encompassed in your warmth and for a moment gets a glimpse at feeling alive once more.

By the time the credits roll you’re fast asleep in Sally’s arms and she remembers her plan to kill you earlier. But she decides against it. Not to make herself some superhero, but because for so long she has been the victim of rejection and you accepted her. You didn’t use her as something for selfish pleasure or take your anger out on her only to leave. Your care was unconditional.

When you wake up the next morning Sally is gone, leaving you confused and almost wondering if you had just dreamed about her. So before you leave, you go to the front desk and ask about Sally and if she’s checked out already. They tell you she’s still here so you leave a note for her before leaving.

It’s only then that Sally comes out from the shadows and looks to see what you wrote to her. And her heart melts when she sees that you thanked her for helping you to feel better and left your number in case she needed someone to talk to.

(https://charliewrites.tumblr.com/post/174967894140/sarah-paulson-in-american-horror-story-roanoke)

Audrey Tindall

Today is your 1 year anniversary of being Audrey’s girlfriend. So the actress specifically takes the day off to spend it with you. And for once she had the forethought to plan a whole day of activities to do together.

However before you can even leave the house, her first plan goes awry when you slip into her shower to “wish her a happy anniversary.” Did she make a breakfast reservation that you will be late for? Yes. But is she gonna turn down shower sex with you? Absolutely not.

But now because of that distraction Audrey is nearly down the driver’s neck trying to get them to go faster so you aren’t late. But they can only go so fast in stopped LA traffic. However you get her attention to show her one of those airplanes making a message in the sky, blissfully unaware of the stress Audrey is experiencing.

In the end you miss your reservation. However you believe she made the reservation for the place next door and ask how she knew it was your favorite spot. So Audrey just rolls with it and says it was instinct and you eat breakfast there. Then Audrey takes you to one of the walking trails up to the Griffith Observatory.

But you accidentally take the “scenic” trail and what should have been a 1 mile trek ends up being almost 3 miles. And that includes walking a half a mile on a side path thinking it’s the right way.

Because Audrey thought it was going to be a small walk she didn’t bring any water or tell you to wear walking shoes so you end up with some gnarly blisters on your heels.

The actress feels horrible about it, but you assure her it’s fine and buy some flip flops and bottles of water from the observatory’s gift shop. Then you take your time to look around the observatory and absolutely love it.

Because the walk took so long, you end up eating lunch at some generic, overpriced but subpar lunch place attached to the observatory. The food isn’t great, but the view is amazing. And honestly you’re both so hungry that you’re willing to eat anything.

After this Audrey takes you to Venice Beach to hang out and shop around. But when you get there, the streets are closed off for a huge block party. And to make matters worse, people around begin to recognize her and come up asking for pictures and autographs.

Audrey feels terrible about everything that’s going wrong and now she has to deal with a swarm of fans. Right away you see her trembling lip and tell people to back off. Then you guide her into a nearby antique shop. Luckily the owner saw everything and locks the door after you enter while saying you’re welcome to stay as long as you need.

You quickly thank him, but guide Audrey who has teary eyes to a section of the store that’s not visible to the windows and ask if she’s ok. While she’s clearly shaken up she nods. But she also tearfully apologizes for ruining the day.

However you silence her with a kiss and soothe she isn’t ruining the day at all. That’s when you both see an older woman you assume to be the owner’s wife and freeze up, concerned about how she will act about your relationship. But she just offers a smile and says she just made some lemonade, offering the privacy of their breakroom.

You follow her back and sit with the older couple while drinking lemonade and end up having a good time just listening to how they got together and they came to own the shop. By the time you say goodbye it’s nearly evening the group of fans is gone, but they let you exit out the backdoor just in case.

While walking down the street you pause at a local restaurant that looks delicious for dinner. Audrey goes to protest saying she made a reservation at some fancy, a-list restaurant. But honestly both of you look pretty rugged with no time to clean up and you are interested in going here. So she agrees to eating where you want since every other plan she’s made has gone to shit.

Because the restaurant is nearly empty of guests, when the server finds out it’s your one year anniversary, they offer a special discount and free dessert. Then they do their best to make the setting as romantic as possible.

In the process you meet the owner and their whole family when each one comes out to congratulate you on your anniversary. The food is delicious and even though Audrey had other plans, this is way better.

When you finish dinner, Audrey sees the sky is overcast to the point that you won’t be able to see the sun actually setting. But you assure her you would love to go to the beach anyways even to just to dip your feet in the water.

So you go to the nearest beach and while you walk along the shore (holding hands of course) you tell her you have loved today. She stops in confusion because everything that could go wrong did and she let you down. But you pull her close to kiss her lips and assure her that you wouldn’t change a thing about today and that you love her so much.

She happily replies that she loves you too. Then it starts to rain. And not like a light sprinkle either. It’s pouring rain that leaves you drenched to the bone within minutes. Audrey looks up and waves her fist at the sky as she curses it for raining this one night when it’s sunny in LA every other day.

But you giggle and end her dramatic monologue with a long kiss before running back to your car. By the time you’re riding home both of you are soaked. But you don’t mind and you promise Audrey that you have made some plans of your own for her when you get back to your bedroom.

Ally Mayfair-Richards

Recently Ally has been super busy working on her re-election campaign as senator. Of course you are her #1 booster and supporter. And you want to do something special for her to help lighten Ally’s load.

So tonight you and Oz decide to make a special dinner for Ally. As usual Ally texts you that she’ll be working late so you have plenty of time to work. Then Oz tells you her favorite meal and you both go out shopping to get the necessary ingredients.

Once you return, Oz pulls out the cookbook with the instructions and sits up on the countertop (Something Ally would NEVER allow) to stay next to you while reading the steps as you cook. But...here's the thing: You have no idea how to cook—at all.

So Oz grimaces as he watches you and tries to help you along with little helpful tips. But he’s a kid—not an experienced cook like Ally.

You struggle through it and know you’re messing things up. But you’re hopeful a couple mistakes here and there won’t be too noticeable. As you finish cooking, Ally texts you she’s headed home so you and Oz run around, setting the table and finishing the dinner. And as you haphazardly pour one of the wines you randomly picked into her glass (Because—let’s be honest you have no idea how to pair wine) the door opens.

As soon as Ally walks into her home, her nose wrinkles at the smell of burnt food and other concerning scents. So she calls out your name before doing anything else, hoping nothing happened, and you reply you’re in the dining room.

When she walks in, her eyes widen at seeing the dangerous-looking meal and Oz’s expression of concern and disgust. But her attention is drawn to you when you tell her you made dinner with a nervous smile.

Seeing all of the effort you put in makes Ally’s heart melt and even though she’s concerned, she goes along with it, thanking you and sitting down. She could struggle through one subpar meal to make you feel good—but then the three of you start to eat.

The first bite Oz takes, he gags and says “Yuck!” That makes Ally shoot him a warning look. However, she nearly chokes when she takes the first bite. So she tries to conceal that by washing it down with a generous sip of wine. But then she actually does choke at the horribly paired food and drink.

At this point you want to die in humiliation and hide your face in your hands. You know Ally is the “bread winner” so that should make you the homemaker. But you have no idea how to “home make.” That has never come natural to you. So you do one thing that you do know how to do and apologize.

Right away, Ally takes your hand and guides you to look at her while soothing that she doesn’t mind cooking. But you explain that you wanted to be helpful and alleviate stress and you just made everything worse for her. She assures you that she finds cooking to be cathartic and just having you and Oz around makes everything better.

So you throw away the disappointment of a meal and all 3 of you head into the kitchen. However most of the necessary dishes are dirty from your cooking so you offer to wash them while Ally takes off her makeup and gets into lounge clothes.

So she heads to your room and you and Oz get to work washing and drying the dishes. As you both finish up, Ally walks in to see him perched on the countertop and drying dishes next to the sink. So she scolds him about sitting there and Oz just throws you under the bus saying that you let him do that all the time.

You try to deny the accusation, but both Ally and Oz know you are horrible at enforcing rules, so you apologize and tell Oz in your “stern” voice no more sitting on the countertop. However, they both know if he sits up there and you’re home alone you’ll ultimately let him do it.

That’s the moment when you take in Ally. Not senator Mayfair-Richards, just your love, Ally with her oversized sweater and cute, little ponytail at the nape of her neck with a couple loose hairs that are too short to stay held back frame her face.

You let her take the lead and watch her come alive as she does the cooking and delegates you to do different side tasks that don’t risk something being over or under cooked. Meanwhile Oz sits at the mini bar and tells his mom about his day. These ordinary moments between the three of you are not very common, but they’re your favorite moments.

In less than an hour, the 3 of you are back in the dining room with an excellent, homemade dinner. You all happily eat the late night meal before going over to the living room and watching a TV show Oz chooses.

He lays across your laps to watch it so he can lean on you while Ally gently strokes his hair and by the end he’s asleep. Then you gather him in your arms before picking him up and carrying him to his bed while Ally follows behind and whispers her shock that you can still actually hold him. Somehow he never wakes up so you gently lay him down and Ally tucks his blankets around him, placing a kiss on his forehead before walking out.

Then you both go down to the kitchen and Ally drinks a couple glasses of wine at the mini bar while you clean up from dinner. Of course she wants to help you, but you insist on her sitting while you take care of everything. And as you go, you ask how her day was.

Ally tells you about her long day and asks your opinion on a couple of the decisions she is considering. While you have little to no experience in politics, she’s thankful that you listen to her and if Ally asks, she knows you’ll always choose what’s best for her unlike other “helpful” politicians.

When you finish up, Ally walks over to you and admits that telling you what to do earlier as you both cooked felt good and asks if you would consider being told what to do in the bedroom by her so she could “relieve the remaining stress from the day.” Of course you are more than happy to oblige in submitting to Ally and let her guide you up to your bedroom.

(https://lauramaher25.tumblr.com/post/179727949356/ahs-ms-wilihemina-venable)

Wilhelmina Venable

You know Wilhemina truly loves you when she begrudgingly agrees to go to Disneyland for your birthday. Of course you butter up the deal by purchasing VIP passes so you don’t have to deal with lines—but still.

The night before you can’t hardly sleep because you’re so excited to go to the happiest place on earth for the first time. But Wilhemina makes you stay in bed even though you want to start getting ready for the day at 4 in the morning.

While you couldn’t convince Mina to “officially” disneybound with you, she does wear a casual plum-colored dress, black cardigan, and shorter heels than usual in the same dark purple as her dress. Even her ponytail for today is less formal then her work coiffure.

On the other hand, you’ve pulled all the stops to disneybound as Snow White. Your outfit has been planned for weeks down to the smallest detail and having your girlfriend looking like the evil queen will make amazing pics.

When you get to the park, you nearly bounce around like a kid with excitement. Wilhelmina watches you with narrowed eyes making her look even more like a Disney villain, but lets you have your moment, only complaining when you go to take a selfie with her. And even then, she manages to give a small smile in the photo.

After you pick up your VIP passes you go to get your pins for your first visit and your birthday. You also get a first visit pin for Mina, but that’s when you find out this isn’t her first time to Disneyland. Then you slowly make your way down main street, stopping to look at every shop. In the process you have the redhead help you choose between two sets of ears and choose a pair for her to wear.

If looks could kill, you would be on death’s doorstep from her glare. At first she says no and remains firm in her answer. However you pull the ole “it’s your birthday and your first time at Disneyland” card so she spitefully wears them, grateful that they’re at least purple. But when you go to buy more merchandise, Wilhelmina drags encourages you out to actually get to the rides.

After taking WAY too many pictures around main street and in front of the castle, you begin to make your way through the park. Your first attraction is the tiki room. Then you share your first dole whip before going on the Jungle Cruise.

That ride just about kills Wilhemina and with each corny joke she lets out a soft groan, pained at how dumb these jokes really are. But she tries to not ruin the moment for you. Meanwhile you crack up at every joke.

Next you ride Pirates of the Caribbean and love it, constantly looking around to take everything in and pointing out Jack Sparrow each time as if Mina doesn’t notice the very obvious lighting and animatronic of him. On the other hand, the red head totally forgets there’s a drop and she lets out an adorable little squeak in surprise that only you hear. Because you like it so much you ride it again and ride Haunted Mansion twice too.

In between the attractions you practically skip along and with any character you pass—literally any character—you will wave at them and would stop to take photos, but Wilhemina drags you along keeps you moving.

As you walk through the park, you notice a couple kids gasp when they see Mina or point at her. Of course the redhead is offended and cold towards them, but then you realize they’re calling her princess Ariel. And at one point while you’re sitting to eat some churros a little girl shyly comes up to you both and says to Wilhemina that she’s her favorite princess before asking how Flounder and Sebastian are doing.

Mina is flabbergasted and for a moment just looks at the girl with wide eyes, bewildered that she would ever think of Wilhemina as a princess. However she pulls herself together enough to say that they're doing well. Then the girl says goodbye and runs back over to her family.

And while Mina has never been a kid person, being called a “princess” by different kids does make her smile a little bit. No one else would notice, but you do.

When you pass by Splash Mountain Wilhemina says no when you ask to ride. So even though you plead to go on it, you keep walking. The only other attraction she says no to is It’s a Small World. Even passing by the facade and hearing the faded music makes her shudder and declare she would rather puncture her own ear drums than go through that.

When it comes to the parade, even though Mina hates crowds, she sits with you and watches you call out to characters like the other kids around. Of course she gives you her trademark look of silently asking if you are really acting like this. However the redhead does secretly find it a little adorable.

Tomorrowland is your last “land” and that’s when you find out Mina kicks ass at Buzz Lightyear’s Astro Blasters. The first time you rode she blew you out of the water and ranked as a 1st class Ranger with a whopping score of 749,000 points and the next time she scored even higher.

For dinner you reserved a special table where you can watch the fireworks while eating. However during the whole show you forget to even touch your food, gasping at everything that happens and trying to take it all in. And because you look so damn adorable, before “rational Mina” can make an executive decision, “impulsive Mina” tells you she’ll ride Splash Mountain if you still want to.

You have never eaten a meal so fast in your life and when you finish you practically run to the ride, thanking Mina the whole walk there. Here’s the thing though—she thought it was an up and down one drop deal, like any other log ride. To the point that she took on the noble task of sitting in front of you so you wouldn’t get you special handmade Snow White dress damaged by water. Oh no, there are 3 drops. 3. So by the time you get off poor Wilhemina looks like a drowned cat. But the picture of your faces on the final drop is just too good to not buy it.

And on the way back, even though she’s soaked with cold water, you keep close to Mina on the monorail packed with people headed back to your car. And it feels so good to have her close to you whispering to ask if you had a good birthday. You know this is something she would never, ever choose to do. But her consideration touches your heart and you answer yes before thanking her once again for doing all of this.

Tagged: @marilynroselleprentiss, @saviorinsilk, @chokemepaulson, @versonstar, @find-me-a-constellation, @cordwliagoode, @psychobitchtess, @midnight-lestrange, @mysweetdelia, @venablesbitch, @peachesandlesbians, @nerdaroo, @cordeliafoxxe, @leskaksel, @lovelymspaulson, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @whatabluddymess, @natasha-danvers, @saucy-sapphic, @marvelfansince08love, @wilheminawinters

Let me know if you would like to be tagged in later works!

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drabbles-of-writing · 4 years

Text

The Girl in Red

This is part of my Four Years AU

AO3

Masterpost

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Just because Lilith lived at the Owl House now didn’t mean that she had to give up on everything.

A big one of those things was Amity Blight.

It had taken a little while to settle in, but the young witches training would not stop simply because Lilith lived elsewhere now. And barely had any magic left.

Alright, so maybe there would be a few complications.

“What’s got you so worked up?” Eda wondered, poking her head in from the kitchen as Lilith gathered as many books on magic she could find.

And though she still didn’t understand it, she had stashed a few of Luz’s spare glyphs into them as well.

“I’m to meet my p rotégé soon.” Lilith said, fumbling as a glyph fell out of one of her pockets. “I arranged to meet her in the woods for some...outdoor training.” She said, clearly unsure of her own words.

“You mean that Blight kid?” Eda raised a brow. “You still train her?”

“Blight?”

Luz suddenly appeared in the doorway, looking around like she expected to see something exciting.

“Do you mean Amity?”

“Of course I do. I still train her.” Lilith snorted.

“Oh, oh! You could train her here!” Luz suggested, looking positively delighted at the thought. “We could train together! Eda’s still teaching me about wild magic, even if she can’t use it anymore.”

“My teaching method is far different than whatever Edalyn has been showing you.” Lilith said, giving Eda a side-eye.

“Yeah, and it works!” Eda stuck out her tongue.

“We could learn from each other,” Luz said, pacing the room in that way she did when she had too much pent-up energy. “It could be a fun training session! Please, please can Amity train here?” Luz begged, facing the witch and clasping her hands together.

“I’m not so sure…” Lilith hesitated.

Luz gave her puppy-dog eyes as she begged, and Lilith had to admit, she was good at it. She couldn’t tell if it came naturally or if Eda taught her that. Probably Eda.

“...very well,” Lilith sighed, shoulders sagging.

"WOO!” Luz pumped a fist in the air. “Training with Amity! Oh, I need to grab my glyphs!” She exclaimed, racing out of the living room and up the stairs.

“Don’t break anything!” Eda warned right before a loud thump and a faint ‘I’m okay!’ could be heard.

“I’ll have to check with Amity herself,” Lilith sighed, pulling out her scroll. “Though I take it she’s been here before?”

“Oh, yeah, the kid visited twice.” Eda nodded. “Once when she erased, like, all of some kids' memories and the other time was when she busted her foot about a week ago.”

“She erased someone's memory?” Lilith gasped, almost dropping her scroll.

“Kid said it was an accident and fixed it up, no big deal.” Eda shrugged casually. “Guess there are some things your protégé doesn’t tell you, eh?”

“Don’t patronize me.” Lilith grumbled. “How she became friends with your apprentice of all people, I’ll never know.”

“Mm, I have a few guesses.” Eda said, glancing off.

Training Amity with Luz and Eda was...a challenge.

For one thing, the way Eda taught Luz was rather...barbaric. Luz didn’t seem super thrilled about it either, though she did as Eda told. Amity was very confused at their antics, and possibly a little concerned.

Luz suggested Amity try it once, and that’s when the lesson first fell apart.

Luz and Amity quickly divulged into a mock-war of the two throwing mushrooms and pine needles at each other. To Eda’s credit, she tried to gain some sense of calm.

For the first twenty seconds.

She began egging Luz on soon after, doing nothing but encouraging the two.

Lilith gave up on the lesson for the day and went inside to make some tea. Amity stuck around for a few hours after the fact, and Lilith mentally noted how red she seemed every now and again.

The next lesson was done inside the Owl House. Eda had (grudgingly) allowed Lilith to inform the girls of how to cast larger illusion spells. Of course, she didn’t know how Luz was going to accomplish it, but the human insisted on listening all the same.

Multiple times Lilith would turn around and find the girls either whispering to each other, trying to stifle giggles, or staring at whatever Hooty or King were doing. Which ranged from eating bugs off the floor to getting stuck in a cardboard box.

Lilith swore she aged at least ten years in that house.

“I think we should stop the double training,” Lilith mentioned to her sister one day. It was while she was on Hooty-cleaning duty. Normally she wouldn’t, but Eda had the high ground. Also known as; bringing up the curse that still haunted them both.

“What? Why?” Eda inquired, leaning in the doorway as Lilith scrubbed a mop just above one of the first-story windows.

“Amity can’t pay attention with that human around.” Lilith said, snapping angrily at Hooty as he tried to come over and ‘help out.’ “She’s done nothing but cause trouble.”

“Maybe you should change up your teaching, then.” Eda said simply. “You’re teaching Amity the regular type of magic while Luz and I are teaching each other about wild and glyph magic. Those two don’t exactly mix well.”

“Amity is in the abomination track, I am not teaching her wild magic to become a criminal like you.” Lilith growled. “I’m happy teaching her other forms of magic, but that’s just in case she--”

“What? Joins the Emperor’s Coven?” Eda cut in, crossing her arms. “Lily, do you seriously want her going to that place after all that’s happened?”

Lilith opened her mouth to argue before slowly closing it again.

“The Emperor tricked you, kidnapped me, tried to kill Luz, and is apparently trying to find a way to the human world. And you want her to join?” Eda demanded with a glare.

“...it’s what she always wanted.” Lilith said quietly, setting down the mop. “She was always so excited to be able to learn other types of magic…”

Eda relaxed with a sigh and walked over, placing a hand on her sisters shoulder and gaining her attention.

“Well, I have a feeling she isn’t so keen on it now.” Eda said simply. “She’s still friends with Luz, you know. Besides, have you asked her what she wants to do now?”

Lilith looked away, almost mad at the shame she felt.

“And anyway, I think she’s having fun.” Eda said, turning her head to look through the window of the Owl House.

Lilith looked up as well, seeing Luz and Amity messing around with King, who was still a little angry at Amity for a previous grievance involving a cupcake. Amity was smiling and laughing as Luz was tackled by King and wrestled on the floor with him.

Lilith couldn’t name any recent time she’d seen the young witch so happy. Not since the last covention.

“And having fun is the important part.” Eda said, patting Lilith on the back.

“Well, if the great and powerful Eda says so.” Lilith rolled her eyes.

“I do say so.” Eda grinned. “Now get back to work! I have a house that needs to be cleaned.”

In the second month, training came to a screeching halt.

In that time, Luz had found zero ways to make it back home, like she thought she would.

As soon as September first had rolled around, Luz had been near inconsolable. The poor girl was frantic, sporadic, sleep-deprived, and unconsciously snapping at everyone the longer the minutes ticked by.

Amity was worried sick. Almost literally.

And Lilith would admit, she was concerned for the human as well. Luz, while definitely as chaotic as Eda, was a sweet, well-meaning kid. She was happy to work with and train by Lilith, and was full of life and excitement, even after all she had done.

To see her so panicked and on the verge of tears made her heart tear.

For nearly three months there was an almost non-stop search. Lilith swore they turned the whole town upside down looking for any clues on how to make a portal to the human realm.

They couldn’t find anything.

Luz had calmed in those three months, but not for the better. She was laying about, unmotivated, and in a general slump.

Lilith remembered when she was like that. Back when she had first cursed Eda, and had to live knowing what she had done had all been for nothing.

She did her best to comfort the human, and in a few weeks, she was getting better. Amity and their other friends all helped cheer up Luz, too. And slowly, the old Luz they knew was coming back.

As did the constant redness from Amity.

Lilith had noticed Amity’s red face during the first two months of training with Luz. At first she thought it was the heat, the circumstances, or that she was just sick.

But, no. Amity was fine...presumably.

It had vanished during the close-to three months of worrying over Luz, but once she started to come back, it arose once more.

Lilith would wander into the living room while Amity was visiting and she’d find the two of them sitting on the couch, talking about unimportant things. Luz would be leaning against Amity in some fashion, or just draped across her lap a couple of times.

Each time she’d find a faint heat in Amity’s cheeks. But as soon as Amity noticed her mentor had arrived, she’d light up and grow stiff.

At first, Lilith thought it was because Amity thought she was being caught doing something wrong, like not training. So Lilith made sure to smile and nod at her p rotégé before continuing with whatever she was doing.

It didn’t help. And in some cases, it appeared to make things worse.

Lilith would also note that Amity was incredibly distracted by the human, particularly when she was focusing on magic or doing something outrageous.

Amity would stare at Luz for quite a while if gone uninterrupted. To the point where she would fumble or crash into things if she was busy doing something beforehand. Quite a few items had been broken that way, and even Eda was getting a little annoyed.

Once, on a hot day, Amity had tied up all of her hair and in turn showed off her undercut. Luz had noticed and complimented the young witch on it. Mentioning how she had wanted to get one, too.

Lilith almost thought Amity had accidentally eaten a bloodshroom by how fast the Red™ had come to her cheeks.

During one of their training sessions, Amity had been practicing her natural fire magic. She had both of her hands in front of her with a small magenta flame. Luz had been sitting on the floor and awed at the sight.

When Amity turned to face her, Luz had sat up on her knees, face illuminated by the glow, and acted like she had seen the most incredible magic in the Boiling Isles. Which was saying something, for someone who had faced Emperor Belos.

Amity’s fire had ignited into a very sudden flame, sprouting upwards and nearly nicking her in the nose, causing a mild panic among the house when she set the carpet ablaze. Which Eda later made her pay for.

Any form of physical contact seemed to bring a flush to Amity’s face. She’d avert her eyes, stutter, sweat. The works.

Usually not all at once, but it was still noticeable. Especially for such a well-coordinated person as Amity.

After weeks of silently observing, Lilith decided it could go on no longer. Amity appeared to be in distress, and Lilith was not about to leave her student high and dry when she could do something about it.

So, she came up with theories.

Her first theory was that Luz was warmer than a regular witch, and that’s why Amity looked so red. There wasn’t much information on human biology, so it’s not like it was out of the realm of possibility.

But that theory was shot down almost immediately. Lilith had been around Luz before, and she was no warmer than any other witch. Maybe Amity was extra sensitive? Allergic to humans, maybe?

Her second theory was that Amity simply didn’t know how to react to Luz. Sure, the two were friends, but Lilith had heard about Amity’s horror-story ‘friends.’ Perhaps she just didn’t know how to deal with having a real friend like Luz.

That theory was torn when she’d watched Amity’s interactions with her other two friends, Willow and Gus. She didn’t act nearly the same way with either of them as she did Luz. And while they definitely weren’t as eccentric as Luz, she figured Amity would’ve shown some similar signs.

Her third theory worried her greatly.

A curse.

Granted, not one nearly as severe as the one she’d given Eda, but a curse nonetheless. Perhaps one of her old friends had cursed her to be distracted or embarrass herself in front of Luz. It wasn’t out of the realm of possibility.

Though she felt like Amity would’ve talked to her if she was concerned about such a thing. She decided to put a pin in that idea.

Her fourth theory was one that confused her, and yet almost seemed to make sense.

Amity was angry at Luz.

The idea seemed preposterous. Amity didn’t hate Luz. She didn’t even dislike Luz. They were best friends, were they not?

Yet, all the signs pointed to the opposite. Amity was known to go as red as a tomato when angry, it made sense. Amity was always going red when Luz was around, and would look anywhere but at her when it was bad enough.

The constant watching, the aversiveness to sudden touch, the stuttering, the ranting she’d hear Amity go off on now and again, the seeming unease.

Amity was furious at Luz. Or at the very least, uncomfortable with her being around.

It made no sense and so much at the same time.

She wondered if maybe the anger was caused by a curse, but that couldn’t be it. Amity would notice then. She must not have forgiven Luz for the humiliation at the covention and the library. That had to be it.

Right?

With this theory in mind, Lilith attempted to keep Amity as far from Luz as possible. Taking her to the marketplace, training in different areas around Bonesborough, instructing Hooty to be a little more aggressive in guarding, things like that.

Amity transitioned from politely confused, to annoyed, to...well, drained.

Luz made a similar transition. She would always wonder aloud where Amity was, to asking Lilith to train back at the Owl House, to the occasional moping on the couch when Lilith left for training.

It seemed keeping them apart had only made things worse. And Lilith hated seeing either of the girls down.

She suddenly went right back to training at the Owl House again, and the cycle resumed. Maybe even stronger this time.

Lilith was confused, worried, and perhaps a little desperate. What, in the name of the Titan himself, could be the problem?

She decided she needed help, as much as she hated to admit it. And she knew just who to ask.

“Edalyn?” Lilith said, looking up the stairs to where her sister was retreating to her room for the night. “May I speak with you?”

“Uh, sure?” Eda blinked, stepping back as Lilith made her way up the steps and stood across from her in the hallway. “What is it?”

“I’m...worried,” Lilith admitted. “About Amity.”

“Is it her parents?” Eda asked quietly, face softening.

“No, no, thank goodness it’s not.” Lilith shook her head. “I meant...about her and Luz.”

Eda stared at her owlishly for a moment. Lilith had to stop herself from curling her lip at her own accidental pun.

“About time you noticed!” Eda snorted before quickly quieting herself down. She really didn’t want to wake anyone in the house.

“You knew?” Lilith gaped.

“Course I did. That kid of yours isn’t exactly subtle.” Eda chuckled. “It’s nothing to be worried about. Luz is a bit oblivious, but I’m sure she’ll catch on eventually. She’s still worried about herself.”

“Nothing to worry about?” Lilith shook her head in disbelief. “How can it be nothing to worry about? It’s interfering with Amity’s training!”

“So? I think the kids got something good going, if you ask me.” Eda shrugged. “Why are you so worked up about this?”

“Because I care about the well-being of my apprentice!” Lilith hissed quietly. “How can you let the two of them continue to be around each other when it’s so obviously causing Amity distress?”

Eda frowned and opened her mouth to retort before pausing. She appeared thoughtful before looking Lilith up and down.

“Just to make sure we’re on the same page; what do you think is going on?”

“What?” Lilith flicked her pointed ears down. “Amity is annoyed by Luz, isn’t she?” She said, tilting her head. “I mean, I didn’t think it could be true, but with all the evidence--”

Eda let out a loud, vaugly distressing, wheeze.

The Owl Lady covered her mouth with her hand and tried to smother her laughs, wheezing all the way so as to not disturb any of the other residents who were fast-asleep.

“What’s so funny?” Lilith demanded, taken aback.

“You think Amity doesn’t like Luz?” Eda whisper-laughed. “Are you dense?”

“Wha--no! I’m concerned!” Lilith snapped, remembering at the last second to keep her voice down. “What are you on about?”

“Lily, you poor, poor moron,” Eda heavily dropped a hand on her shoulder and looked up, still hunched over from her laughing fit.

“That Blight girl has a crush on Luz.”

Lilith blinked, once, twice. She stared at Eda as the gears in her head slowly began to turn and shift.

“...wait, really?”

Eda had to smother another laugh, visibly shaking with the effort.

“I’m serious!” Lilith whispered. “A crush? Is that what this is?”

“Obviously! Kids head-over-staff!” Eda stood up, leaning against the wall as she raised a hand near her chest to smother any further laughs should they come up.

“Honestly, Lily. I knew you weren’t the smartest tool in the shed, but this is ridiculous.” Eda teased. “I thought after years of watching me fall for those kids in Hexside you would’ve been able to recognize this.”

“You were different!” Lilith huffed, crossing her arms and turning her body away slightly.

“You would go out of your way to show-off. You’d do all you could to be near them while laughing at any stupid jokes they made and had the most absurd face when you’d see them across the--”

Lilith paused, thinking over what she said as the smile on Eda’s face grew.

“Wait... wait,”

Eda covered her mouth again and wheezed, turning her head away to avoid laughing harder at the shocked face Lilith was sporting right now.

"See-see my...my point?” Eda wheezed out.

“Great Titan, you’re right. As much as I hate to admit it.” Lilith muttered. “And I tried to get them apart.”

“Yeah, not your smartest move.” Eda giggled. “Still think it’s going to interfere?”

“Of course it is. But I’m not going to stop it.” Lilith said simply. “What do you take me for?”

“A woman who curses her own little sister while she’s asleep?”

Lilith gave Eda a deadpan stare. Eda returned it with a smug one of her own.

“Fair, but still.” Lilith relented. “I’m honestly surprised Amity could get so flustered over, no offence, a human.”

“I was surprised, too.” Eda agreed. “But, honestly? I think it works.”

“What makes you say that?” Lilith wondered.

Eda waved her hand and drew Lilith further down the hallway. She stopped outside of Luz’s room and gestured for her sister to be quiet.

Slowly, Eda cracked open the door and peered inside before stepping back to let Lilith see for herself.

Luz and Amity were leaning upright against the back wall, both of them asleep. A discarded The Good Witch Azura book laying in Amity’s lap.

Luz’s head was resting in the crook of Amity’s neck, mouth half-open.

Amity was laying her head across Luz’s, looking far more peaceful.

They each had a hand resting beside them. Amity’s fingers were brushing Luz’s, having looked like she was going to hold her hand before either chickening out or falling asleep.

“See what I mean?” Eda whispered gleefully as Lilith stepped back and quietly shut the door.

“Alright, yeah, you have a point.” Lilith admitted. “I have a lot to make up for,” She mumbled.

“Eh, you can start now.” Eda shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time you messed up.”

Lilith made sure her sister saw the irritated face she gave her.

“Now go to sleep already before we accidentally wake up Hooty. He’ll never shut up if we--”

“Did someone say Hooty?”

“There he is,”

Lilith sat on the couch in the living room, reading a book on glyph-magic. It was early morning, and the rest of the household had yet to rise after the rude awakening from Hooty last night.

Lilith knew that whenever Amity stayed overnight at the Owl House, she would either go home early or very late in the day, depending on if she had informed her parents beforehand.

This time, she had forgotten to tell them.

Lilith wasn’t surprised when she heard the soft footsteps of Amity hurriedly walking down the stairs.

Lilith lowered her book for a moment and turned towards the doorway as Amity stepped through, gazing around nervously. She froze when she saw Lilith, like a child caught stealing from the cookie jar.

“So,” Lilith stared awkwardly, sharply closing her book. “Luz, huh?”

Neither of them moved, or spoke, for a good few moments.

“Seriously?” Amity groaned, giving Lilith an exhausted stare. “I didn’t even do anything yet!”

“This happens that often?”

88 notes · View notes

transromanticism · 3 years

Note

ok i’m supposed to be doing homework but um ,, shawngus wedding thoughts:

• they’re both really really into planning the wedding (pinterest boards, binders meticulously organised and colour coded)

•they’re also both really stubborn about what specifics they like, but also luckily they’re mostly on the same page for everything so it never becomes a big Thing (however they do bicker about somethings (of course) so they made a rule where they each have 4 vetos for whatever they want)

• the wedding is in june because they like summer colors and august is too hot

• the colors are white, pastel pink, and pastel green

• shawn and gus have matching boutonnières (white flowers)

• gus wears a pastel pink tie

• shawn wears a pastel green tie

• they’re both the best men

• juliet is shawns groomswoman

• joy is gus’s groomswoman

• they don’t do the think where you don’t see the other person the whole day before - they actually do the opposite. they drive over together, get ready together - they tie each other’s ties and put on each other’s boutonniere (they also get very distracted smiling at each other and kissing). the only time they’re apart is like the 3 minutes when they walk down the isle.

• henry and maddy walk shawn down first

• gus’s parents walk him down the aisle next

• even though they literally just saw each other a couple minutes ago, it’s like the whole world stops when they meet at the altar. they’re both grinning like crazy and right when they meet, shawn kisses gus before they walk up the 2 steps. (“you know we’re supposed to wait for that.” “i don’t care, i’ve waited my whole life.”)

• their vows are soft and cute and it’s the longest shawns ever been serious for more than like 2 minutes but couldn’t care less, because this is the best day of his entire life.

• gus cries during the whole thing and has to pause every other sentence

• shawn kisses him in the middle of gus’s vows and wipes his (happy) tears

• after they exchange rings, shawn and gus fist bump.

• the fist bump melts into them holding hands and they hold hands for the rest of the ceremony

• it takes a while for them to stop hugging after they kiss (for real this time), until the preacher guy clears his throat and then they walk back down the aisle together

• everyone throws flower petals at them as they walk outside

• instead of going right out to the reception party, they had planned for some time (like 10 mins) alone right after the ceremony. so they go to one of the rooms in the building they had rented for the reception and are just soft and sweet and happy and alone together until they’re ready to go see everyone.

• the party isn’t too big, but it is elaborate, because, ya know, it’s shawn and gus.

• there’s a lot of food. like. a lot.

• they do every stupid cliche in the book

• “mr. and mr. spencer-guster!”

• they dance - a lot. and it’s really hard for them to stop touching and hugging and kissing (they haven’t stopped holding hands yet ok?)

• gus has yet to stop crying

• (so has shawn)

• they get a bit too champagne drunk and sleepily sway in each other’s arms to 80s pop music until most everyone’s left

• they go to mexico for their honeymoon

• (a little resort off the coast of nowhere that has beaches and pools and pina coladas in pineapples)

• shawn loses his ring within the first 2 days

• he’s very upset and on the verge of tears and most definitely does Not want to tell gus and thinks he can find it by himself

• gus comes in with their lunch and sees shawn on the ground behind the desk and immediately knows what he’s doing (he thinks it’s hilarious but shawn does Not)

• they spend the afternoon looking and when they (read: gus) find it shawn almost cries again

• shawn decides to keep his ring on his necklace because he never loses those and this way it’ll be safe forever

• gus thinks it’s cute (and hot) and when they’re cuddling he likes to play with it with his fingers

• they really don’t want to have to leave mexico, but they’re also really excited to go back to sb and just live life, but married

• they have a cute apartment and a bunny

• shawn and gus are 10000x more annoying and insufferable than they were before married

• it’s hard to stay mad at them though, because , i mean, look how happy they are

• henry refuses to allow gus to call him mr. spencer anymore (he actually told gus this in like high school but oh well)

• shawn and gus use every single opportunity they can to refer to each other as “my husband”

• shawn and gus are happy, in love, and married

SHUT UP THIS IS TOO CUTE 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞 catch me wanting a marriage like this

i really don't have anything to add. like, this is just too good, i can't stop smiling

can't stop thinking about gus crying throughout the whole night and at some point shawn laughing and gus's like "shut up shawn, i'm a sympathetic crier" and shawn (who has also cried the whole night) is just "i know, babe" and kisses him 🥰

ANYWAY INSUFFERABLE MARRIED SHAWNGUS LOVE TO SEE IT

#a: jmccarstairs #psych #psy: a friendship for the ages #asks.txt

21 notes · View notes

waywardfangirl · 4 years

Text

Write This Down

General Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply

Baz Pitch/Simon Snow | 3,305 words | Complete

Summary: Inspired by Write This Down by George Strait - Baz and Simon love each other, and they know it. But, Baz came close to losing Simon once, and he doesn't intend to let that ever happen again.

***A big thank you to @foolofabookwyrm for editing this for me literally the second I finished writing it! I love you!!!***

Baz

The first time I told Simon I loved him, tears were pouring down both of our faces and we were absolutely miserable. It was one of the worst days of my life, and I hated the fact that every nice thing Simon and I have, every special moment and milestone in our disaster of a relationship, is marred in some way by tragedy. We kissed for the first time in the middle of a burning forest when I was so deep in the throes of self-hatred I couldn’t find my way out without Simon to save me. Instead of the honeymoon phase that every other couple gets, Simon and I received death and destruction and trauma, and then hearings and interrogations before the Coven. When we tried to go on vacation, to take a break and do something to pull Simon out of the pit of depression he had spiraled into, we almost died multiple times. When I finally propose to him I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure that dark creatures can’t find us, the weather can’t ruin us, and even our well-meaning but nosy friends can’t disturb us.

But I’m getting too far ahead of myself. I can’t start planning for a proposal just yet, because I’m still not sure that I won’t lose him one day. He told me he loved me with tears streaming down his cheeks, and then he tried to break up with me.

I had started crying around that time too; I wanted to be in control, I wanted to shut off my emotions so Simon wouldn’t be hurt by my own anguish, but instead traitorous tears came streaming down my face and I started babbling out every thought I’d ever had – please don’t leave me and I’m not happy without you and no no no don’t go, Simon, please don’t and eventually I love you, I love you too, I love you so much, there’s nothing for me if you aren’t here, I love you. So, no, it was not one of our better moments.

Once I finally convinced him that breaking up with me would, in fact, not help me at all, we agreed to put serious effort into working on our relationship. This has also meant that both Simon and I found ourselves going to (separate) therapists, and coming together once a month for couple’s counseling too. Put together, we’re utilizing three-quarters of the magical word’s mental health resources. (It’s helping.)

(Read the rest on AO3, or under the cut)

I don’t know exactly what Simon discusses with his own therapist (although I could probably make a few guesses), but my therapist has been encouraging me to work on my own anxieties as of late among other things. I haven’t been able to shake my fear that Simon might decide to leave again, and that crying amidst declarations of love won’t fix things this time. So, since I can’t control the actions of others, I can only control what I think and do myself (yes, thank you Amy, the once-weekly sessions are working and I now hear your voice in my head when I evaluate my own thoughts), I’ve decided on a course of action that will help both Simon and myself.

I start by stealing his phone. He only uses the notes app to write down things he wants to bring up in therapy, so I ignore all the existing memos and start a new one, just three words – I love you.

(The numpty never bothered setting a passcode, I should modify his phone more often. He needs a new lock screen.)

Three days later, Simon emerges from his bedroom after his appointment, face blotchy and tear tracks drying on his cheeks. Every muscle in my body pulls to gather him up in my arms and give him shelter in the form of an embrace, but I know in moments like this I have to let him make the first move. Luckily, he walks straight over to where I’m putting the dishes away and immediately buries his face in my neck. His arms cinch around my waist, and I waste no time in pulling him closer to me, carding one hand through his curls.

“Alright, love?”

He nods, pressing in closer, then mumbles into my skin, “I love you.”

Ah. He found the note, then. Good.

“I love you too.”

*****

The next week, I walk into Simon and Penny’s apartment after classes, only to find Simon asleep on the couch. Netflix is playing some action movie on the tv, and Simon’s face is twitching slightly, still reacting to the sound even while fast asleep. I know he was up late last night preparing for a big presentation, so I let him rest. As I pull my laptop out of my bag to study at the kitchen table, I grab a sticky note as well, and attach it to the center of the television screen.

I love you

An hour later, I hear the tv shut off. Simon wanders into the kitchen, sitting down at the table and scooching his chair over until it’s pressed up next to mine. He kisses me on the cheek, and then on the mouth when I turn my head.

“Hi love, how was your day?”

“Good. Better now.”

*****

Finals are upon us, and of course the worst academic weeks of the year are also the time when Simon and I decide to try spending the night together again. (Just sleeping, but sharing each other’s space for that long, being there together when we wake up the next morning.) I feel like all of this should be so much easier, like other couples just make it look so effortless – we love each other, why can’t we show it? Why is it so hard to turn those emotions into actions and words? I don’t ever want to be beside anyone else, how can I prove that to him?

After the first few nights, it starts to feel normal. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the feeling of Snow’s arms wrapped around me, his muscles relaxing as we both fall asleep, but I don’t want to get used to it. I want it to be novel every single time, I always want to feel this in love with him.

Tonight, though, I can’t let myself lie down until I finish this last essay. I’ll edit it tomorrow, but I can’t stop writing until I’m done or I know I’ll lose momentum. Simon went to bed at least half an hour ago, and that’s all the incentive I need to keep my fingers flying across the keyboard; the sooner I’m done, the sooner I’ll be back beside him.

I close my laptop at half past midnight, and attempt to straighten the academic mess on the kitchen table before breakfast ruins a textbook tomorrow morning. Snow has left his books in a perilous heap, on the verge of teetering onto the floor, so I straighten the stack, then pick up the top book.

It’s a textbook, An Introduction to Social Services, because my brave and caring boyfriend wants to continue saving the world in any way he can. The first half of the book is filled with bookmarks and flags, highlighted passages and scribbled notes in the margins. He’s been attacking his studies with a vigor he’s never shown for academia before, and I’m so proud of him. I pick up a pen and add a note of my own under the practice review he’s flagged with tomorrow’s date (when did he get to be so organized? He’s wonderfully full of surprises even now) – You’re absolutely brilliant, love.

I leaf through the book to the next practice exam, this one flagged for three days from now. You’re the most caring man I’ve ever met, you were born for this work. The review in the middle of the book gets a simple (true) I’m so proud of you, and then I start leafing through the pages I assume Simon will be using next semester. I don’t let myself question the future, I don’t let uncertainty and anxiety creep in, I just write notes on random pages, to be discovered in the middle of lectures or homework or studying.

My darling

You’re the only sunshine I need

Have I told you lately how handsome you are?

I adore you

You’re my perfect other half, I’m so happy we match

Finally, I leave an index card mixed in with the ones he’s been using for review.

Q: How much do I love you?

A: More than I can possibly say.

*****

Simon Snow can still go off. He’s less physically destructive now, nothing in the flat gets burnt to a crisp and he doesn’t leave craters behind, but sometimes his emotions get stopped up until they come out in a flood of yelling and crying, and he erupts.

We’ve both been trying to be better about handling our outbursts, and trying not to take bad days out on the other, but sometimes it still happens. I don’t know exactly what happened today, but from what I can make out it seems like small things just piled up until I rolled my eyes when Simon suggested watching Star Wars, and that became the straw that broke the camel’s back. Old habits die hard, and we both still give as good as we get when fighting, so fifteen minutes later Penelope came home to find a screaming match in the living room and neither of us even aware of what we were saying or fighting over anymore.

She made us sit down and go through all the skills we’ve learned (use “I” statements, list your emotions, say what you admire about the other person – fine, thank you Amy, your voice is still in my head) until finally we had calmed down enough to be there for each other again.

I held Simon as he cried into my shirt, and we crawled into bed together still holding hands. We kissed before falling asleep and the last thing I remembered was Simon’s breath ghosting over me.

Now though, I’m awake, pulled from sleep and my boyfriend’s arms because I needed a glass of water, and I suddenly can’t stop reliving our argument. We’re fine, I know we are, we’re going to be okay. All couples fight, what matters is that we sat down and talked about it afterwards. We’re both sorry and we both love each other.

I can’t help the voice in the back of my head though, the voice that insists that Simon still thinks I don’t love him and that he might leave me again. I ignore it, then tell it how wrong it is, before finally giving in to my anxiety and tearing a blank piece of paper from the notepad on the fridge. I leave the note on his bedside table, so he’ll see it first thing in the morning, when he inevitably wakes up before I do.

Simon, my dearest, I love you so much. I promise, I love you, no matter what.

*****

“Baz! Did you get it?”

Simon Snow is bouncing on the soles of his feet like a toddler crossed with a golden retriever, and if anyone else were acting like this I would make a point of ignoring them, but because it’s Simon I just kiss him quickly and pull the book out from behind my back.

“Yes, love, I got it. Hot off the press, specially for you.”

Simon’s never been much of a reader, but after discovering ‘the best book in the world’, as he puts it, he’s been devouring this series. The newest one was released today, and I promised him I would pick it up from the bookstore on my way home. (I’ve read them too, and they are quite good, although Simon is definitely more enchanted with them than I am.)

“Can we start reading it right now?” He’s got it clutched to his chest like a child, and—no, that’s dangerous territory to enter, I can’t let myself start thinking of Simon with a baby or else I won’t leave this flat until I’ve proposed to him, and he deserves a nicer proposal than whatever happens to fall out of my mouth right now. Besides, I don’t even have the ring with me, it’s still hidden in my sock drawer back in Hampshire.

“Are you suggesting skipping dinner?” I hold up the bags of takeaway I’ve brought. He looks anguished.

“Can’t we do both?”

He’s a disaster. I love him.

“Alright you bottomless pit, you can eat your dinner and I’ll read to you, will that work?”

He kisses me again in response, a proper snog that’s only interrupted when Bunce wanders through to the kitchen, remarking loudly to Shepard, “They have their own room and everything, but they still insist on doing this sort of thing out here in the open.”

Simon good naturedly flips her off, and I pull away to smirk.

“He’s far too attractive for me to confine my affection to only one room in the house, Bunce. It’s not fair to expect me to restrain myself when my boyfriend is so criminally handsome.” I take Simon’s hand and tug him into the living room to settle against me as I start to read.

When all the food has been devoured and my voice is starting to lull Snow to sleep, I grab a scrap of paper, scribble I love you on it, and then insert it in the book to mark our place.

*****

Simon has been baking up a storm. He’s determined to figure out Cook Pritchard’s recipe for sour cherry scones, because she won’t give up the secret and he hates having to wait for Pitch family gatherings to eat them. He’s going through butter like a fiend, and all of our neighbors adore us because he keeps giving batches away.

When he leaves the kitchen to go retrieve something from his bedroom I slip a note into the fridge, to be discovered the next time he picks up the butter.

I love you

Three days later, I find the note affixed to the freezer door.

*****

“It’s so empty!”

Simon’s voice bounces off of the walls, and it almost echoes. The house really is empty, at once both exciting and intimidating – this is ours, this is where we get to keep building our life together, this is where we’ll make more memories, this is where we’ll start our family.

“The rest of our furniture will be here tomorrow, love, the movers said they could have it in before nine.”

I hear running footfalls, and then Simon comes sliding down the hall in his socks, crashing into me and almost knocking me over.

“Maybe we should keep it like this, and we can use the first floor for sock races!” He’s laughing, and so happy, and I adore him.

“Mmm, perhaps not,” I say, pushing his curls back from his face. “As enchanting as that idea may be, I expect you’d be sad if Penny and Shepard stopped visiting us because they had no place to sit. And I’m sure you would miss having a dining room table, too.” I kiss him on his nose, because it always makes him laugh, and then I lean back, grab his hands, and spin him around in circles in our empty living room.

Once we’re both too dizzy to stay standing, we collapse on the floor together, struggling to swallow our giggles. Eventually, I pull Simon back up to standing, and nudge him to start unpacking what we can. Dishes go in the cupboards, and sheets go in the linen closet. One of the boxes I open has a hammer and nails, and Simon finds the box that we put our pictures in. Some have to be set aside until the furniture is arranged, but we hang a few in the kitchen and the entry hall. Right before we blow up the inflatable mattress and go to sleep for the first time in our new house, I lead Simon back into the living room and pull out one last photo to hang.

The picture itself is quite large, a candid shot taken during our engagement party. Simon was laughing at something I’d just said, and he’s as bright and radiant as ever. I’m gazing adoringly at him, looking every bit the lovesick fool I am. Penny and Shep are in the background, along with Fiona and the rest of my immediate family, and everyone looks so happy to be celebrating the two of us. It’s one of my favorites, enlarged to sit in a frame over the mantle, where everyone who enters our home will be sure to see it.

It’s a bit of a struggle to get it to hang straight, but eventually we manage it.

“That looks lovely. I didn’t even know you’d had that one framed, I like it.”

I kiss his neck, and wrap my arms around his waist, hooking my chin over his shoulder and holding my wand out in front of him.

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”

We watch together as three words start to curve around our bodies in the portrait, shiny gold cursive tethering us to each other and stating simply, I love you.

Simon leans back into me, turning his face up for a kiss. “I love you too,” he whispers when we pull apart, “Show-off.” Then he’s walking backwards down the hall, leading me towards the stairs, and going to break his neck if he tries to go up the stairs without first turning around. I’ll tell him tomorrow that the spell I cast will only show those words if they’re true and if I still mean them. (They’re going to be there forever.)

*****

We go ring shopping together. We want our wedding rings to match, and to also complement the engagement rings we gave each other, so we block off an entire Saturday to find the perfect bands. (It turns out that the perfect rings are hiding in a jewelry store just a few blocks from Simon and Penny’s first apartment, which I think has a lovely symmetry to it.)

The rings themselves are simple, gold bands that compliment both of our complexions with a delicate scattering of engraved stars barely visible on the surface. We know immediately that these are our rings, we hardly need to glance at each other to confirm it.

As we’re being sized and filling out all the necessary information, I hand over a folded slip of paper.

“I would like this to be engraved on the inside of his ring, please.”

Simon’s mouth falls open for a moment, then he reaches into his jeans pocket to pull out his own slip of paper.

“I’d like this engraved inside of his too, please,” he says, and I can’t help but loop my arm around his waist.

“I suppose great minds think alike, don’t they Snow?”

He wrinkles his nose.

“You’re going to have to start calling me Pitch before too much longer, you know.”

I wasn’t prepared for this argument, and I’m far too in love with him to have a satisfactory response ready.

“No I won’t. Pitch will be your last name, and Snow will become your middle name. You call me by my middle name already, so we’ll match,” I add, as a happy afterthought.

The jeweler chuckles.

“You really do. You want the same engraving and everything.”

I feel like he maybe should have understood that those messages were meant to be a surprise, given Snow’s obvious shock, and the folded pieces of paper, but I’m a little too happy to care. Our wedding rings are going to match, inscription and all.

I love you

#Write This Down #my fic #snowbaz #snowbaz fic #Write This Down Fic #this is just self-indulgent fluff

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twinkleomorashi · 4 years

Text

Day 2 Desk Wetting

Day 2 Desk Wetting ( Junior Year Preston)

AN: Yeah big shock, Preston again. It is technically day 2 after all so I managed to get this done just 4 minutes too late lol.

All characters in sexual scenarios are 18 or older. Read my “refz” tag. Preston is 18 in her junior year, the only reason this doesn’t take place when she’s 19 and a senior is because in the greater universe of my fics it wouldn’t make any sense. I care too much about the pissfic universe canon, soz about it. Contains female omorashi. Not your cup of pee? Don’t read!

Not My Fault

Teachers need to chill the fuck out. Listen, I get it that seniors are all little shits who just wanna get out of school already and I wouldn’t wanna deal with us either, but if you’re getting paid to do it there’s no need to be such a massive bitch all the time. Apparently it’s not their fault though. No, apparently it’s my fault. My fault that my idiot friend Josh dared me to chug four bottles of gatorade back to back without hurling. I mean, yeah I didn’t have to do it, but then I wouldn’t have gotten $20. Fine, I can see how that’s kinda my fault. But my third period teacher didn’t have to assign a test today and she didn’t have to make a rule saying that nobody was allowed to leave the room during it. And my fourth period teacher really didn’t have to have such a harsh tardy policy which forces me to sprint to her class everyday or risk detention.

What I’m saying is, it’s really not my fault that I have to piss this badly right now.

I scribble down the homework assignments I probably won’t do in my planner I never used. The writing is more messy than usual, I have to go so bad my hands are shaking. I finish writing and slam the planner shut before trying to casually walk up to her desk.

“Ms. Perez? May I please use the restroom?” I ask in my nicest voice.

“No, you’ve already used your bathroom pass for the semester, remember? September 2nd?” she asks.

It was December 14th, of course I don’t remember that. Oh wait.. That’s the day I ditched class in favor of Taco Bell. Fuck, I’ve screwed myself over. I’ve screwed myself over so bad. No way would I be able to last another hour and twenty minutes like this, I can literally feel my bladder pressing up against the waistband of my jeans and I’m already bouncing my legs and squirming in my seat like an idiot.

She shrugs me off and starts to lecture. And lecture. And lecture. She’s lecturing for years. Centuries. I know it’s history class and all, but does it really have to be taught in real time? The scenario is so cliche I’m shocked I haven’t been in it sooner. I have to pee fucking so bad, holy fuck. I jam my hands between my legs and cross them out of sheer desperation to not risk accidentally letting any out, it helps. I feel a pencil tap my left shoulder.

“What?” I irritatedly whisper at the tapper, my friend Andrew.

“Does wittle Pweston have to go to the potty?” he chides.

“ Leave me alone, dicksack.”

Fuck, if a dumbass like him noticed I’m definitely being too obvious about it. I’m conflicted, do I sacrifice my pride or my (relative) comfort? I slide my hand out from between my legs and hold my legs still. Nope, nope nope nope. It feels like I’m seconds away from pissing myself when I act natural. I check the time. How the hell do we still have an hour left?!

“Ms Perez?”, I beckon, “May I please use the restroom?”

Some kids snicker, probably noticing that I’m drenched in sweat and trembling like a cold chihuahua.

“Is it an emergency?” she asks.

I swallow my pride for the sake of my pants.

“Yes.”

“You should’ve thought of that on September 2nd.”

The class laughs again. It takes all of my strength not to lose my shit over that. That was over three months ago, how the fucking hell was I supposed to know that I would be on the verge of pissing myself in the middle of her class in a few months? And this bitch has the nerve to keep on lecturing. I have to piss too badly to pay attention, much less write notes. Andrew taps me again.

“What now? More words of wisdom?”

“She usually gives in at this point. Guess she just hates you.” he shrugs.

“Andrew, if I piss myself I am placing 23% of the blame on you.”

His eyes widen.

“You have to go that bad, huh?” he chuckles as I rock back and forth in my seat with my hands still between my legs.

I don’t see how he couldn’t have realized that yet. I feel tears prick into my eyes. I can’t tell if it’s because this hurts so much or if it’s because I can tell that I’m reaching the end of my rope at a quick and dreadful pace. Panicking is only making it worse. I need a plan. Fuck, fuck, fuck, I need a plan. Why can't I think of a plan?

Then something horrifying happens. I leak. A ton. It surprises me so much that I whimper in surprise and take a sharp breath. A few kids turn their heads so I try my best to act natural to some extent.

Once they lose interest I quickly inspect that crotch of my jeans. Fuck, it's noticeable. It's really noticeable, there’s a patch about the size of my palm and a couple drops of piss already on the desk chair. I start hardcore freaking out. I can't hold it much longer. Hell, I don't even know if this counts as “holding it”. The stain on my jeans is only gonna get bigger if I don't do anything about it. I shakily raise my hand for the second time in five minutes.

“I said no, Preston.” she says, barely turning away from the board.

I whimper again in frustration, more heads turn. Some kids whisper. Holy fuck, this is so embarrassing. I’m usually not so shy with this kind of stuff, but I literally know only one person in here and it’s fucking Andrew. If I was with my friends I could at least laugh it off.

“Miss, please.”, I beg, “I know you don't want me to miss anymore class, but I- I can't even focus right now!” I whine, my voice shaking. I'm willing to do just about anything to not piss myself right now. I can brush off any comments about this, but if I don’t make it I’m never gonna live it down.

Ms. Perez slams the dry erase marker into the built in tray on the whiteboard and puts her hands on her hips.

“Fine, but we're gonna use this as a learning opportunity. See, kids? This is why we don't skip class-”

Fuck fuck fuck! She's lecturing again. I leak once more, a small puddle starts to form on the chair. I panic and try to sit back further in it to try and cover it up. The feeling of wetness only causes another spurt to escape, somehow traveling up the seat of my jeans. I'm not gonna make it, there’s no way. This isn't happening. This can not fucking be happening.

“Because leaving class at all detracts from your learning and then you use up passes that you're going to need later. And on that note, you really should be going before class.”

The leaks become longer and much more frequent. Even if she stops lecturing right this second everyone is gonna see that my jeans are soaked when I stand up and there’s no way I’m making it all the way to the bathroom, but if worst comes to worst at least I can hide somewhere and avoid making a scene over the inevitable. Another wave of desperation hits me and I can tell my time is running out fast. Hell, can I even move from this position? I slowly uncross my legs to test the waters.

I let out a shaky gasp in surprise as the floodgates stop leaking and burst open entirely. My hand instinctively flies to my mouth as I freeze in shock and try really really hard not to make my heavy breathing obvious. Everybody in the room except for the teacher who's too wrapped up in her fucking lecturing can tell what's going on. A puddle forms on the desk chair and dribbles down to the scratchy classroom carpet. Loudly. To the point where I wonder how the hell she can't hear it. I cross my legs to try and quiet it in sheer mortification but now I can hear people whispering. This can't be happening, this can't be happening.

“So you can't really come crawling back to me if you miss information, because you chose to leave class.”

There's no point in trying to hold back at this point, there's no going back or covering it up now. I put my head on my desk in defeat. Pissing after holding it for a long time is probably one of the greatest feelings in the world. Even if it is in your jeans during the middle of history class. Okay that was the grossest thing I've ever thought. Ignore that please. But I’m not wrong. But-

“So in short, be smart about your bathroom passes. Now hurry, Preston.” Ms. Perez nods. My face is burning with embarrassment as I nervously bite my tongue knowing I had no choice but to fess up before someone did it before me.

“T-Too late.” I stutter through the tears pricking in my eyes. I feel like I'm gonna pass out. My face is so hot with embarrassment it feels on fire.

Her face goes pale, almost sickly so. She stands still, unsure of what to say. All eyes are either on me or her. I slowly stand up, covering my ass with my backpack and my crotch with my spiral which was nowhere near the right size for the task at hand.

“So, uh, I’m gonna go now.” I blush, regretting my choice of words but leaving before any obvious jokes can be made.

And I don't come back. I embarrassedly stormed outside the school, rummaging for my car keys and pressing the car unlock button for way longer than necessary before practically diving into the driver's seat. I start the car and let my head rest against the steering wheel as it turns on, still in park. I glance down at my jeans and can’t help but to find a little humor in it. If people give me shit for it there’s nothing I can do. This so obviously is not my fault.

#omorashi #omo #omocute #female omorashi #omovember #coromo

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lovemesomesurveys · 3 years

Text

Can you say you are fully happy right now? No. My mental health and my mood and everything has just been extra bad lately and I thought it was bad enough as it was. I haven’t felt truly happy in a very long time.

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? No.

Is there someone who stopped talking to you for no reason? Yes.

Did you ever get called horrible names like (whore, skank, bitch)? Only jokingly with friends.

Where did you sleep last night? In my bed as usual.

Ever slow danced with anyone? No.

Ever cried in public? Yes, but only a few times. I don’t like crying in front of people.

Ever feel safe in someone's arms? Yes.

What would you do if you were pregnant? I can’t get pregnant, so.

Are you afraid of letting anyone in? Yes, very much so.

Do you like cuddling? I don’t have much cuddling experience to be honest.

Ever cry in school? No.

Who is the last person to send you a message on facebook? My Nana. She sent me a photo of her Christmas tree she put up.

Do you look decent when you wake up? I don’t look decent ever.

Have you ever been given roses? No.

Had a long distance relationship? Nope.

Does it bother you when people never answer their cell phones? If I need to get ahold of my parents or brother for something and they don’t answer, yes.

Do you care what happens in politics/your government? I mean, yes. It affects all of us so we should care at least somewhat.

Ever been called babe/baby? Yes.

Have you ever witnessed someone else engaging in a sexual act (not necessarily sex)? No.

Where did you get drunk last? It was at my hotel birthday party 7 years ago. I had an awful experience with alcohol and I decided I was over it. I haven’t drank since.

What’s your relationship with the last person you texted? He’s my brother.

If someone went through your pictures, would they find a dirty one? Nope.

Do you want to see anyone right now? No.

Have you ever fell asleep in someone’s arms? When I was a kid.

How long does it take for you to fall asleep at night? It really varies.

How many pillows are on your bed Twelve lmaooo. I only use two, though. I just love throw pillows.

When’s the last time you cried? A couple of days ago. It was one of those days where I was just on the verge of tears all day and literally anything could open up the floodgates.

Is it cute when a guy buys you flowers? Sure.

Will things change in the next month? I don’t see anything major happening.

How did you do on the last test you took? Pretty sure I did well.

Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t? Plenty of times. Are you afraid to grow up? I mean, I’m 31, and sometimes I still don’t feel like I’m grown up. <<< Saaaaame. But also yes.

Are you busy tomorrow? Nope.

How long have you had the shirt you’re wearing? A few years.

Do you give out second chances way too easily? Yes. I give out many chances.

Has anyone told you that you’re amazing? Eh, something like that. I’m most definitely not and I’m sure they realized that.

How many black shirts do you own? A lot.

Do you think you will be in a relationship three months from now? Nope. I honestly can’t imagine myself in a relationship. I definitely don’t see it happening anytime soon at all.

How come you’re not going out with the person you like? There isn’t anyone I like in that way.

When you feel cold does eating warm food help you feel warm? Yeah.

Do you want to diet? I need to be on a high protein and caloric diet.

Are you a patient person? Nopeeee.

Are you unsure about your feelings for someone? No.

Who did you last hang out with? My family. It’s been a few years since I’ve hung out with anyone else.

Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car? $40,000, please. What song are you currently listening to? I’m not listening to any music right now. I’m listening to an ASMR video, as per usual.

Are you happy with your relationship? I’m fine with being single.

Who was the last person to smoke something other than a cigarette or weed in front of you? I’ve had friends in the past smoke a vape in front of me.

Does anything on your body hurt? Of course.

If the last person you kissed were calling you right now, would you answer? No. I would be shocked and curious, though. It’s been a few years since I’ve seen or talked to him. It would be so out of the blue.

In the run of a week, how many times do you straighten your hair? Zero.

Are you mad at someone right now? No.

Last thing someone gave you? My brother bought me food last night.

Who woke you up this morning? I haven’t gone to sleep, yet.

Who is your favorite family member on your mom’s side? My mom.

What do you do in your spare time? I have nothing but spare time nowadays...it’s sad. Lol. <<< Last few years, but same.

Who was the last person you were under a blanket with? No one.

Where is the last person you kissed? I have no idea.

What was the last thing you ate? Ramen.

Which of your friends is the most likely to get pregnant right now? I don’t have any friends.

Do you remember the meanest thing the last person you kissed ever said to you? He didn’t ever say anything mean. He said things that were hurtful and upsetting, but not things directed at me in a mean way if that makes sense.

What does your last outgoing text say? “Whaaaat. Of course. :/”

Have you ever been called prince/ princess? Yes.

Waiting for something? I’m looking forward to giving my family their Christmas presents.

Have you kissed anyone when you’re single? Yes.

What are you doing this weekend? Same stuff I do everyday.

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette? It’s been 31 years, so I certainly could. <<< Same again. I have zero interest.

Have you ever kissed someone who was in a relationship? No. Where is your biological father right now? At work. Where is the biggest scar on your body? The vertical one down my entire back. How late did you stay up last night? I’m still up at 8:33AM... :X

Have you had your birthday this year yet? Yes, back in July. You had to kiss the last person you texted, would you? No, that’s my brother. What would you call your body type? Underweight. Are you a morning person? Kind of since I’m often still up early in the morning. I’m not if I’ve gone to bed and have to get up early, though. Have you ever been to Target? Countless times. Do you like iced coffee? I’m a hot coffee gal year round. It’s so much better. When is the next time you’ll be at work? I don’t have a job. Has anyone ever hacked your accounts before? Yes. Could you ever be friends with someone that broke your heart? I tried to be. It’s definitely not easy and ultimately didn’t work out. Ever made a prank phone call? My friends and I did that before in middle school. We were dumb. Does your mom vacuum early in the morning, when you’re sleeping? No. Have you ever been in a car accident? No, thankfully. Have you ever been in a fist fight with someone? Nope. Or any kind of physical fight. Have you ever seriously hurt anyone by mistake? Not physically. Have you ever had stitches? Several. Name a time when you had to be strong. Numerous times. Certainly not these past few years even though some might think that. I’m weak. Have you ever dealt with a divorce or parents fighting or any kind of abuse at home? No. Have you ever lost someone close to death? if so, how many? Three. Have you ever had any volunteer jobs? Yes. Have you gone through a lot emotionally growing up? Yes. Has a boy/girl ever cheated on their boyfriend/girlfriend for you? No. And I wouldn’t want that. Do you want to see someone this very minute? Nope. Are you happy with the way things are going? Absolutely not. Are you a forgiving person? Yes. Maybe too forgiving at times. Do you have to check in with your parents before you go someplace? I didn’t have to as an adult, but I still did (I say did cause I never go anywhere anymore unless it’s with my family, but if I did I would). That’s just how my family and I are, we let each other know what’s going on. It’s not asking permission, it’s just letting each other know. Like my brother, who’s 21, will be like, “Hey, I’m hanging out with so and so tonight. We’ll probably just grab something to eat” or something like that. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? I don’t have any friends. Describe how you feel about your life in the past month using one word: Frustrated. Would you like to go back and change any part of your life? A few things would be nice. When will your next kiss be? I have no idea. Not anytime soon, I know that much. Last person you saw other than your family? My doctor. Will tomorrow be better than today? It’s still too early to say how today has been. Are you feeling guilty about anything right now? A lot of things. What’s going through your mind right now? I’m getting hungry. I’m tired. I have to call my doctor and reschedule my appointment. When’s the last time you had fast food? Last night. Do you believe that there’s good in everybody? Not everybody. Is it okay if you kiss people when you’re single? If they’re also single and consenting, sure. When was the last time you saw someone attractive? I see Alexander Skarsgard on my dash pretty often, ha. What was the first thing you did when you woke up? I haven’t gone to sleep, yet, remember?

Think back eight months ago, were you single? Yes. I’ve been single for several years. What do you carry with you at all times? I always take my phone and wallet. Depending on how long I’ll be gone I’ll take my medicine, too. Oh, and in today’s world I always have a mask and hand sanitizer. Are you okay with the life you live? There’s a lot I wish were different. Do you have a Tattoo? Nope. What other piercings would you get other than the ones you already have? I don’t plan on getting any more. Did your last kiss take place on a bed? Nope. I think it was in his car. Have you ever been to Disney World? No, but I’ve been to Disneyland a few times. If so, how many times have you been? Does grammar and capitalization mean anything to you? Absolutely. I’m big on proper grammar. Are you good at wrapping gifts for others? I’m not the greatest, but I still enjoy doing it. Do you have a dirty clothes hamper in your room? Yes. Do you enjoy big holiday dinners? Yes. We haven’t had one in years, though. Is your vision good? With my glasses, yes. ha. Is your present hair color, natural? Part of it is. I’m sooo overdue for a dye job. It looks awful. What was the last thing you ordered online? Christmas presents. Have you ever worn color contacts? Nope. Or any contacts. The idea of putting them on and taking them off freaks me out. If you have a significant other, how long have you been together? I’m single. Where are your parents as of now? My mom asleep, my dad is at work. Do you follow a certain religion? Yes, I’m a Christian. Do you have any family members who live out of town? Yeah. Do you consider yourself short? I am. What room are you in? Mine. Do you listen to any country music? Yeah. Do you ever watch Lifetime? Very rarely. Would ever consider having children in the future? Nope. Have you ever lived on a farm? No. Do both of your parents have jobs? Yes. If you had the chance to move to a completely different state, would you? Ummm. Maybe. What is something you’ve always wanted a boy to do for you? Commit? What food are you craving right now? I’m already thinking about Wingstop for dinner lol. How old were you when you stopped believing in Santa? Like 7 or 8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Numerous times. Do you have a friend you can tell stuff to and you’re sure they won’t tell? I have my family I can do that with. Would you ever get someone’s name tattooed on you? If I did it would be a loved one who passed. I don’t plan on ever getting any tattoos, though. I’m too big of a scardycat. Does your family have family picnics? No. If your doctor said you were pregnant, what would you say? I’d say you have my chart mixed with someone else cause that’s impossible for a couple of reasons.

#personal #text #survey #surveys #long survey

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stateofloveandnegan · 4 years

Text

Broken - Gwilym Lee

I got this idea a loon time ago and I finally managed to writing it. enjoy :)

Requested by: no one

Warning(s): angst, cheating

Masterlist

With every step I take it feels like the day just gets worse and worse. Without any good reason my boss fired me. I don’t mind the fact that I don’t have to work there anymore, but I do need the money.

Of course, my boyfriend, Gwilym, is rich enough to make a living for the both of us, but I’ve always told him that I don’t want to be dependent, I want to make my own money, and I want something to do in my day to day live.

It has been a month since I’ve seen him and that’s another factor that makes your day even worse. Barely able to hold back the tears, I open the lock on the front door, which seems to be open? I guess I forgot to lock it this morning, or my mum came over during the day to return some stuff she had lent and forgot to lock the door when she left.

When I step inside though, those possible ideas are quickly thrown out of the window as I see Gwilym sitting. “Gwilym?!” I whisper-shout in surprise, tears gathering in my eyes at the overwhelming sensation of finally seeing him again.

I run up to him and jump into his embrace, before he can even do anything to stop me. I hug him tightly, but when I feel him moving back a bit, my brows furrow in confusion and I let go of him. Once I finally take the sight of him in, all I can see his sadness and… guilt?

I swallow hard, he hasn’t even said a word yet. “Gwil?” I ask quietly, my voice more vulnerable than ever. Gwilym gulps and breaks down right in front of me, on the couch, with his head in his hands.

He looks up after a moment, his bloodshot eyes meeting my confused ones. “I- I’m so sorry… I-” he starts, confusing and worrying me even more. I move to sit down beside him. Gwilym recollects himself, wiping his eyes and sitting up before turning to me. “I did something, (Y/N). Something I should never have done, something I regret with everything I am.”

The worry grows even bigger and that’s showing on my face, as I can see Gwil on the verge of breaking down again. “What did you do?”

“I- I…” his voice breaks again, but he tries not to break down again, “I slept with someone else.” He swallows a huge lump in his throat, not daring to meet my eyes.

I didn’t know this day could get any worse, but boy… how wrong was I. I’m so shocked by his words, I’ve gone numb. I can’t think clearly, and I can barely move. Gwilym looks up, confused by the silence. But when he sees my face, he knows enough. “(Y/N), please say something.”

As if I’m snapped out of my shock, tears well up in my eyes and I look everywhere, but at him. I try to form a proper sentence, but nothing seems to make sense. Gwilym says my name again and I shake my head, moving away from him. “How…” I finally manage, standing up from my seat on the sofa. “How could you do that?”

Gwilym follows my actions, standing up as well. “I don’t know what came over me. I swear I didn’t do it because of her. I don’t even know her, (Y/N). I can’t even remember her name…” he whispers brokenly, seeing how much I’m hurting. “We went out with some of the cast members and had way too many drinks. We started playing ‘seven minutes in heaven’ and I just went along with it, nothing happened, until one moment this girl, she just…” he chokes out a breath, not wanting to hurt me more than he already has, but he knows he owes me the truth. “She literally just put her hands on me… and she started kissing me and because I was so drunk, I didn’t really know what I was doing and I honestly thought it was you. I dunno why, because if I’d thought about it, that wouldn’t even be possible, but I was highly convinced it was you. A- And then, the next moment, I wake up and I realise what happened, what huge mistake I made. I immediately took my stuff and left.”

I stand there, listening to his story, desperately trying to remain strong. I open my mouth a couple of times, but nothing comes out. I can feel Gwilym’s eyes boring into mine, but I don’t give into the feeling of wanting to look back into his. “I’m out of here.” I choke out in a whisper, unable to be in this house any longer. I move past Gwilym in order to grab a bag and I throw as much as I think I need into it.

“Please, don’t leave.” Gwilym, who must’ve followed me into the bedroom, cries out. “We can get through this. (Y/N), please!”

I continue to ignore his pleads, walking into the bathroom to grab my stuff. When I’m done in there, I want to leave the bathroom, but the doorway is blocked by a rather tall figure standing in the way. “Don’t go, please. Yell at me, scream at me, but- but please don’t leave me.” He cries, eyes redder than I’ve ever seen possible.

“Move.” I say, trying to keep my tears at bay. Gwilym shakes his head, “No, I’m not letting you go.”

“I said ‘move’, Gwilym! Let me go!” I yell, my anger bursting through, taking over the pain. Gwilym’s eyes widen in surprise; he’s never seen me so angry. I gulps and steps away from the door, and I immediately walk past him, back into the bedroom. I quickly think of everything I need and soon realise I’ve got everything, so I grab my back and head for the door after taking my coat with me.

Gwilym tries to get me to stay the entire time, but right now, I simply can’t be around him. I need time to think, time away from him. It’s rather funny, isn’t it? For a month, I wanted nothing more than to be with him again. Right now, all I want is to be as far away as possible from him.

I put my stuff into my car and get in before Gwilym can do something to stop me. At first, I have no idea where I’m going, but I soon think about the beach house my parents own, by the sea.

Fortunately, I always have a spare key with me, so I don’t have to go to my parents and explain everything. I really don’t have the energy to unpack my stuff after entering the house, so I just throw the bag onto the bed in the bedroom and go back to the living area, plopping down on the couch and looking out at the sand and the sea.

I finally let myself think about what just happened, the anger fading and the sadness entering my body. Soft cries fill the room and all I can think about is Gwil; he was so broken. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so sad, crying so hard.

Gwil is probably at home, thinking I just left our relationship behind, but I didn’t. I love him so much; I can’t give up on us that easily. He did something horrible, but he knows that, too. If he didn’t care so much, if he didn’t realise what mistake he’d made, he wouldn’t have been so devastated. But he knows.

I just needed some time, time to think, to clear my head.

That night, I simply can’t sleep. Gwilym is all that’s on my mind. Even though I’ve only been here for a couple of hours, I desperately long for home; for being with Gwil.

Knowing I probably shouldn’t, I grab my phone and dial his number, the picture of the two of us on his profile bringing tears to my eyes. It rings a couple times, before Gwilym’s very hoarse voice speaks up. “(Y/N)?”

“Hey Gwil,” I say quietly, clearly not having thought this through enough. “I just… I’m not really leaving you, us… I just wanted to clarify that.”

I can feel a pang at my heart when I hear Gwil crying again, “I’m such a fool, (Y/N).”

Not being able to hold myself back any longer, I tell him I’ll be home in half an hour; I need to be with him right now.

Gwilym’s sitting on the front porch, an empty cup of tea in his hands as he shivers from the cold, tears still running down his cheeks. My heart breaks at the sight of him like that, but I don’t pity him too much, knowing it was his own doing.

“Go inside, Gwil.” I say quietly when I reach him. He stands up, shoulders slumped, and walks inside with me behind him. I close and lock the door, setting my bag down in the hall before joining him on the couch.

Only hours before, we were sitting in the exact same position.

No words are spoken for a while, Gwilym crying into his hands while I’m sitting beside him, contemplating on what to do. The urge to lean forward and pull him into my arms is too big to resist, so that’s exactly what I do.

Gwilym is surprised, but doesn’t hesitate one moment before burying his face into my chest and wrapping his arms around my waist. “I’m so sorry.. so, so sorry.”

The lump in my throat becomes too big and I break again, tears silently rolling down my cheeks as I hold Gwilym like it’s the last thing I’ll do. “I know, I know… we-” I take a deep breath, my voice shaking, “We’ll be alright. We’ll get through this.”

After Gwil and I have both calmed down a bit, Gwilym leans back to look at me, his hand carefully moving up to cup my cheek, “I don’t deserve you, (Y/N). I’m so stupid… I’m an idiot. You deserve so much better than me.”

I shake my head, tears gathering in my eyes once more, “I don’t want anyone else, Gwil. I love you; I want you. Yes, you did something horrible, but I can tell you’re also feeling horrible about it. As is said: we’ll get through this.”

Gwilym nods, trying hard to believe my words, not sure if he’s dreaming them or not. “You can’t… you’re not leaving again, are you?” I ask, not sure if I’ll be able to get through, or over, this if he’s going to be away again.

Gwilym shakes his head roughly, “I’m not going anywhere. I… I quit the project. I couldn’t be there, I knew I had to be here, with you.”

For some reason, that calms me down a lot; knowing that Gwilym will be home for a while. Knowing he won’t be seeing her again.

“I love you, Gwil. But what you did was really fucking stupid and I’m gonna have to learn how to trust you properly again.” I say, my eyes gazing into his. He nods, “I know, you need time, I know. Take all the time you need, I promise I’ll be here, waiting for you… I won’t go anywhere. You’re my future, (Y/N), no matter how long you need.”

“And you’re mine, Gwil. Promise me you won’t, ever, do anything like that anymore.” I’ve never heard Gwil answer anyone so quickly, his words almost come out as a desperate shout: “I promise!”

The action causes a small chuckle to leave my mouth, and I wrap my arms around Gwilym’s, still shaking, figure. “Let’s go upstairs, freshen up a bit, and go to bed. Today’s been an awful day.” I say and let out a long sigh.

Gwilym nods, carefully taking my hand in his and grabbing my packed bag when we pass it on our way up. A short fifteen minutes later, we’re both in bed. Gwilym is hesitant to snuggle closer to me, so I take the first step and lay my head on his shoulder, burying my face into the crook of his neck.

He immediately wraps his arm around me, holding me close to him. All that’s going through his mind his how lucky he is with someone like me; he messed up really bad, yet here he is, with me in his arms.

We’re both entirely exhausted from all the emotions from the afternoon, and before anything, I start drifting off to sleep. But, just before I completely fall asleep, I hear Gwilym speaking in a very quiet and vulnerable voice: “Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be. For the rest of my life.”

#gwilym lee #gwilym lee x reader #gwilym lee one shot #gwilym lee imagine #gwilym lee fanfic #gwilym lee fan fiction #gwilym lee fanfiction #gwilym lee fan fic #gwilym lee drabble #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fic #fan fiction #imagine #drabble #reader insert #angst #cheating

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i-write-about-anything · 5 years

Text

Jealous(pea)y Pt. 2

Prompt: Sweet Pea and the reader are dating but recently she’s been spending a lot of time with Fangs causing jealousy to rise in Sweet Pea. (with a little unexpected twist)

Pairings: Sweet Pea x Reader, Fangs Fogarty x Reader (honestly I’d like to be in the middle of these two lmao bye!)

I don’t know how this went south but lmao here ya’ll go.

Part 1

Third Person POV

(Y/N)’s arm wrapped around Sweet Pea’s right arm, her face resting against it. His jaw clenched as Fangs pursed his lips, gulping in fear. “Look man, it’s not what it looked like.” Fangs started causing Sweet Pea to take a step forward. (Y/N) completely terrified as to what her boyfriend would do to is best friend. She stepped in front of Sweet Pea, her hands resting on his chest.

“Calm down, you’re not going to hurt him.” Her eyes traveled to his, which didn’t move from Fangs. “You’re not hurting Fangs.” Her voice was stern which caused his eyes to meet hers.

“And why the hell not? Are you fucking him too?” Sweet Pea’s voice spat out causing (y/n) to scoff and remove her hands from Sweet Pea’s chest, she took complete offense to the statement, Sweet Pea had never thought of her as a slut and the comment he had just made practically called her a whore.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” (Y/N) had completely sobered up.

“You were practically fucking him out on the dance floor, you’ve probably been kissing him behind my back.” Sweet Pea’s eyes were dark, he was fuming and he was taking his anger out on the wrong person.

“Fuck you.” She shoved Sweet Pea back who sighed knowing he fucked up. “Fangs has been your best friend for years, if you want to fuck that up be my fucking guest, but me and you, we’re through Sweet Pea.” She walked out of the restroom; Sweet Pea hot on her trail.

“(Y/N), wait.” Sweet Pea yelled catching everyone’s attention but (y/n)’s. Fangs walking back into the bar slowly, his arms crossed over his chest. She grabbed her jacket from the bar before whispering a goodbye to Toni. “(Y/N).” Sweet Pea grabbed her arm, everyone’s eyes on the couple. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it.” He whispered causing her to laugh before closing her fist and shoving him off.

“No, I think you did.” Her eyes met Fangs and she nodded her head towards the door, he nodded knowing she wanted him to go with her, despite the fact that he tried to kiss her Fangs was still her best friend and that’s what she needed right now, her best friend. Fangs moved passed Sweet Pea slowly, scared that he might have done something.

“Don’t do this.” Sweet Pea’s eyes were still dark, he was mad that she was choosing Fangs over him but what he did wasn’t something she was taking lightly. (Y/N) scoffed once more before linking her arm with Fangs and walking out the door with Fangs leaving Sweet Pea in the middle of the bar, the Serpents looking at him. He looked around the bar noticing before fixing his leather jacket. “What the hell are you all looking at?” He roared and everyone turned their backs on him before he looked at Toni who wanted to speak. He shook his head and walked out of the Whyte Wyrm, that’s where he saw her, on the back of Fang’s motorcycle. They rode off before he could even get to her. He cursed out loud before he kicked his bike, falling over in the process.

Fangs parked his motorcycle in the front of her house, (y/n) jumping off before throwing the helmet on the pavement of her driveway, her eyes releasing the tears she had been holding in, she was thankful her mother had gotten an extra shift at the hospital. Fangs sighed before walking to her, engulfing her into a hug. Sweet Pea had always been the one to make her feel better about herself, when the North-sider’s wrote Serpent Slut on her locker he was the one that was more upset than she was, threatening to murder whoever did it. “Hey, it’s okay.” Fangs rubber her back. “I’m sorry I tried to kiss you, I was just, I don’t know feeling the alcohol, I didn’t mean to, I shouldn’t have even thought about it, this is all my fault.” Fangs couldn’t help but feel guilty, for trying to kiss his best friend, for being the reason she had ended things with Sweet Pea, for literally everything that had happened tonight.

“It’s not your fault Fangs, Sweet Pea’s just a fucking asshole.” She pulled away before wiping the tears from her face. “He practically called me a fucking whore.” She scoffed and rubbed her face with her hands. “Such a fucking asshole.” She wiped the constant tears as she whispered out.

“You know he cares about you; he was just upset.” Fangs put his hand on her arm and she shook her head shaking him off.

“I don’t care how upset he was Fangs he disrespected me, basically called me a whore and he doesn’t trust me which is way worse than anything else. I’ve never given him a reason to not trust me, I've never done anything to hurt him.” She looked down, her tears still spilling. “You’re my best friend Fangs, and I'm sorry if it seemed like I was trying to lead you on.”

“Oh, no, no.” Fangs shook his head. “This is on me; you’ve made it clear that Sweet Pea’s the only one you’ve got eyes on. I can see it, Jughead can see it, Toni can see it, we all can.” Fangs backed away from her once he heard a motorcycle, no doubt that Sweet Pea would try to beat the shit out of him now. “Talk to him.” (Y/N) shook her head and turned her back on Fangs, her legs walking rapidly to her front door. Fangs wasted no time to catch her arm, Sweet Pea’s motorcycle parking next to Fangs’. His eyes set on Fangs hand on (y/n)’s arm. She tried her best to take her arm back from Fangs but it was almost pointless with his strength. Sweet Pea walked up to them, his eyes fixed on Fangs as his jaw clenched. “I don’t want any trouble, Pea. I’m not here to take your girl away from you.” Fangs didn’t let go of her arm; her eyes closed not wanting to turn around to see Sweet Pea.

“Then what the hell are you doing here?” His voice was angrier than it was back at the Whyte Wyrm.

“I’m here because she needs a friend Sweet Pea.” Fangs let go of her arm but she didn’t move. “You’re a real piece of work, you know that? You really think that low of her that she’d cheat on you, with me?” Fangs was riling him up and he was on the verge of popping off.

“You’re supposed to be my friend Fangs.” Sweet Pea pushed him backwards earning a look from (y/n).

“I am your friend Sweet Pea!” Fangs’ voice roared, pushing Sweet Pea back. “I’m sorry that I tried to make a move on her but I was tipsy and I wasn’t feeling myself. But you’ve been my best friend for years Pea, and I'll be dammed if I let you treat her the way you just did.” Fangs’ breath was heavy as his chest heaved. Sweet Pea looked at (y/n), the tears rolling off of her face as she looked at both boys.

“I didn’t mean anything I said back there.” Sweet Pea whispered, (y/n)’s eyes looking at Fangs before he nodded and took a step back.

“Then why did you say it?” She sniffed, wiping the tears away from her face before crossing her arms over her chest.

“Because I was mad alright, I’m a dumb-ass, I know. But what did you expect me to think? You’ve been hanging out with him, every god damn night. You tell me your busy but you’re with him. You hardly ever spend any time with me anymore and then back at the bar, I thought you wanted to spend time with me, but instead you’re with him.” He motioned to Fangs. “Again, time after time. You’re supposed to be my girlfriend, not his.” He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“I’ve been hanging out with him because I'm scared, Sweet Pea. He got shot and he barely made it out alive, I'm sorry that I don’t want to take him for granted, like I had been for years.” She shook her head. “You don’t own me Sweet Pea, I'm not a piece of property, If I want to hang out with Fangs, I'm going to fucking do it and I would appreciate it if you didn’t call me a whore for doing it.” Fangs closed his eyes; he knew Sweet Pea had a temper and he was on the verge of it already. Sure, he’d never hurt (y/n) physically but he’s hurt her mentally already and he could do it again.

“I didn-” She cut him off.

“You did. Maybe not in those words but you implied. You should know me better, you should trust me, just like I trust you every day you’re at the Whyte Wyrm.” Sweet Pea’s eyebrows scrunched in confusion. “Toni told me about the girls throwing themselves at you but guess what, I trusted you. I didn’t assume you were out there being a man whore, did I?” Her voice was loud.

“I do trust you.” Sweet Pea’s voice was just as loud. “It’s him I don’t. And I'm sorry but I'm not letting you hang out with him after he tried to pull a move on you.” His finger pointed to Fangs who stood awkwardly a few feet away. He should have left minutes ago but he couldn’t just leave, not without knowing what was going to happen between the two.

“Well it’s a good thing we’re no longer together.” She dropped her arms before turning her back on her newly broken up boyfriend before walking into her house. She locked the door before sliding down it, shoving her face in her hands and continuing to ball her eyes out.

______

forever tags; @bojabee @imperfect-circle @dakotapaigelove @a-gir1-has-n0-name @riverdalehoeeeeeee @sabertooth-potato @heyitscam99 @peterstarksstarker @royal-fanfic @vixengustin88

#sweet pea imagines #sweet pea #sweet pea x reader #sweet pea fanfiction #riverdale #riverdale fanfic #riverdale masterlist #archie andrews #jughead jones #betty cooper #veronica lodge #kevin keller #fangs fogarty #fangs fogarty x reader #cheryl blossom #toni topaz #reggie mantle #josie mccoy

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smallmediumproblems · 5 years

Text

Rhymes with Larson

The meeting was a sober one. Jon, Daisy, and Basira huddled around the table trying to hide various emotions with various degrees of effort. Basira was holding up the best, scrolling away on her phone and pausing occasionally to type a manic sentence or two. Daisy leaned on her elbows with her hands clasped in front of her mouth, eyes fixed on something across the restaurant. Jon slouched back in the cushioned booth seat and stared vacantly up at the ceiling. He looked a bit like a puppet with his strings cut.

“I got margaritaaaaaaas,” Melanie sang as she returned from the bar, determined to make the meeting less sober in both a literal and figurative sense. She slid into the booth next to Basira and unloaded four pint glasses of acid-green slurry into the center of the table. Without looking up, Basira grabbed one and immediately took several very large gulps before slamming it back down.

“I thought we-” Jon started to say quietly. He cleared his throat and tried again, sitting up properly. “It’s ten in the… Thank you, Melanie.”

“Cheers,” said Daisy, lifting a glass. The other three dutifully toasted and drank.

With one last, emphatic string of text, Basira stowed her phone and fixed the team with a sharp stare. “So,” she said, “Let’s go over this again. Nothing helpful on the news, big surprise there, but I asked a couple old colleagues to poke around. Should have something for us in the next twenty-four hours. Jon, mind walking us through what you know?”

“I don’t, ah…” Jon took a second to collect his thoughts. “Right. At about three in the morning, I woke up from a dead sleep absolutely sure that my flat was on fire. But it wasn’t. I could… I could feel it, the heat on my skin, the wood starting to give way under me. That’s all it was. A feeling. Everything looked normal.”

“Get to the point, Jon,” Basira said impatiently.

“Basira,” Daisy chided.

“Go ahead, Jon,” said Melanie. She lifted her hand like some deeply buried instinct wanted her to put it reassuringly on Jon’s arm, but instead reached for another sip of her margarita.

“I, um,” Jon continued. “I don’t really know when I put together that it was the archives? That were on fire, I mean. I thought I was having a nightmare. I called the police right away, then I called you. I don’t think I could have driven there, I couldn’t- The, the smoke was-”

“Then I wasted about forty minutes figuring out you weren’t actually trapped in a burning building,” Basira continued for him. “Because you didn’t tell me you weren’t in the archives.”

“What was left of them,” said Daisy. “By the time we got there, it was mostly burned down.”

“What would have been a waste is if you had come to pick me up first,” Jon said defensively. “I needed confirmation on what was happening.”

“Confirmation? Jon, I thought you were dying,” Basira snapped. “You damn well sounded like it on the phone.”

“But you didn’t,” said Melanie. “None of us did. Hence, drinks!” She raised her glass for another toast, but only Daisy joined in this time.

She looked around the table at Basira’s calculating half-scowl, and Jon’s unconcealed shock. “Oh, I’m sorry,” she said, “Are we pretending this is a bad thing? Should’ve gotten something stronger. I’m a better liar when I’m drunk.”

“I’m still trying to figure out why we’re not dead,” said Daisy. “Even Jon got out okay.”

“Aside from feeling like I was being burned alive all morning,” said Jon. He didn’t feel okay. He wished he could say he’d passed out after Basira hung up on him, but he’d been unable to. Instead, he’d felt the fire tear through the institute with as much excruciating detail as though it was his own body. When it was over, he’d just felt… cold. Empty. Like he’d been hollowed out inside.

“And we still don’t know where Martin is,” he added, trying to distract himself.

“Which is a good thing,” said Basira. This was the closest her voice had come to sounding empathetic since Jon had called her several hours ago. “They haven’t found his body, not to mention anyone else’s. We have no reason to believe he’s more dead than any of us.”

“And Elias?” asked Jon.

Basira looked away.

“Basira, what happened to Elias?” Jon found himself remarkably unbothered by the prospect of Elias being in danger, but it did make him curious.

“Missing,” she said. “I got a call this morning, while we were still sorting everything out. He’s just… Gone. No trace of how he got out or where he went.”

“Aaayyyyyyy,” Melanie cheered, “Not our problem anymore!”

A muted grumble of agreement went round the table, and they toasted again.

“So, what happens now?” Jon asked no one in particular.

“Someone did this,” said Basira. “We need to find out who, and if they’re going to come after us.”

“You’re sure you don’t have anything?” Daisy asked Jon gently.

“That’s the thing,” said Jon, “I really don’t. Not just about the fire, I’ve got nothing. It’s like I’m cut off from the Eye, or like it’s muffled, somehow.” He frowned, reaching as far and as hard as he could, until finally a glimmer of recognition sparked in his eyes.

Jon smiled for the first time in several months. “Excuse me,” he said, getting up from the table and walking briskly across the restaurant.

“Jon, what was that?” Basira demanded. “Jon!”

He called something over his shoulder that was lost in the din of the crowd; “It’s,” Basira heard, “it’s” something. She looked back at her drink with a sigh that was bordering on a snarl. “Fantastic,” she said to it accusingly.

“Are we gonna talk about this now, or…?” said Daisy in a hushed voice. She jerked her head towards where Jon had disappeared to.

“He is not our responsibility,” Basira growled.

“He’s not just gonna disappear if we leave him,” said Daisy.

“Good for him,” said Melanie, swirling her drink in an uninterested little circle. “One more thing I don’t have to feel guilty about when I finish this and phone Georgie to come get me.”

Basira sighed again. “Guilt has nothing to do with it. He’s going to get worse.”

“Maybe,” Daisy said thoughtfully. “Maybe this’ll be good for him.”

Basira laughed. “Really? You think being cut off from the only structure that kept him acting like a person, and from his only source of food that’s not literal human suffering, will be good for him?”

“Worked for me,” Daisy shrugged.

“Oh, my god,” Melanie groaned, “Why do we care?”

Daisy and Basira went quiet.

“Look,” she explained, “You’re not getting it. He’s not our responsibility because none of this is. Not him, or Helen, or Elias, or whatever asshole thinks they’re gonna end the world next. As of this moment, we don’t have to deal with any of this anymore.”

“Only the parts that are still trying to kill us,” said Basira. “I really, really wish you were right. Just because we’re not responsible for this stuff, doesn’t mean we don’t have to deal with it.”

“Whatever else the archive was, it was safe,” Daisy admitted. “Now, all we’ve got is us.”

As if to punctuate her statement, they all became suddenly aware that Martin was standing a few feet from their table, staring at them. At first glance, he looked startlingly untouched by the chaos, a heavy messenger bag slung over one shoulder as though he was on his way to work. Upon closer examination, though, he was clearly going through several stages of grief very rapidly, and looked like he was on the verge of tears. It occurred to them all about the same time what he must have assumed, seeing the archives destroyed, and then finding them there without Jon.

“Excellent,” said Jon from behind him. “You’re not dead!” He had a desperately big grin on his face and a fifth pint glass in his hand.

Martin stared at him quite literally as though he’d seen a ghost. “Yeah,” he said, “You too.”

“Here,” said Jon, offering him the margarita. “I got you a-”

“Oh, thank god,” Martin said immediately.

#part 1 of a few #had this thought earlier and it sort of crystallized into something bigger #deffo takes place late season 4 #which means I gotta write fast so it's relevant before the next few episodes #tma #the magnus archives #tma spoilers #fanfiction #smallsays

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latina4rmbx · 4 years

Text

Purpose Driven Life...

Before you get in a huff, I know the title above is the title to a Religious Diary. I have one, someone very dear to me gave me. However, this is not totally religious. Now, notice I said “NOT TOTALLY?” Well, when it comes to living your purpose or finding your purpose in life, it’s kind of difficult to ask those questions without mentioning a higher power driving you. Get it? No? You will.

I will admit, I am a person who is random. I will randomly reach out to people I haven’t communicated with in years, just because they were on my mind. I will randomly sing a song because it’s stuck in my head and I will randomly ask a question, because this is what I do.

What if I tell you, my randomness isn’t..well, for lack of a better term...random? What if there is a rhyme and reason for everything I do (I can’t speak on anyone else BUT myself) even if I don’t know it at the time I do it? You may think I’m talking about a higher power controlling me or the universe or the spirits that guide me. Whatever you call it, I’ve realized, my randomness is NOT random.

For the record, I will say, not every time I want to reach out to someone I do it. I think of them, wonder how they’re doing, pray for them - hoping they’re well - and then go about my life. There are some doors that need to remain closed, and for the most part, I’m good on maintaining this level of closure.

Yesterday I reached out to a dear friend of mine. Mind you, we probably converse once every few months. Not because there isn’t love there, there is an abundance, but life being what it is. You know the story. I reached out as I was driving, because she was on my mind heavy.

SIDE NOTE: This is the little sister of an ex of mine. He passed away a couple of years ago. His death anniversary and his birthday are days apart. So whenever August/September rolls around I think of her very much. She was my rock during this ordeal and I hope I was hers.

I reach out to her on some “what’s up? how you doin’?” type but something compelled me to ask a simple question: “Are you happy?” Now, it may be an innocent question however, I know this womans life story. I know her parents, her brothers, he children, her love and her heart break. Without getting into detail, she has suffered a lot of constant heartbreak. When I say “constant,” I mean, it was one thing after another after another and she didn’t get a break from it. Me, being witness to part of her heartbreak, I had to ask. She has recently taken control of her life and I am so proud of the woman she IS and has always been.

SIDE NOTE: I am a very honest person. Honest to a fault. Don’t get me wrong I have lied, here and there, but when it really counts, I will be honest because it’s what I expect from those around me. Those who can be honest with me, regardless of how it makes them look (honest about themselves) or how it will make me feel (honest about me) are those who I treasure most. But I digress...

Her response was a very short and appropriate one: “ Wow that’s pretty deep! It’s okay that you didn’t to text me. He was definitely on my mind. Am I happy....I’m not where I want to be but I’m nowhere near where I was in the dark. I’m on the right track to my happiness. What made you ask me that? How about you? Are you happy??

Well, didn’t she just lob that question right back at me? “I am happy. Very. I had to choose to be.”

Now, here is where things take a very meaningful turn.

This is something I have been vocal about, but not really on social because frankly it’s no ones business, until I allow it to be someone’s business. Again, without getting into too much detail, Bebesito and I had been going through a really rough patch. At the end of the day, I allowed my insecurities override my happiness. More on that in another blog...MAYBE

HER: “So you worked things out with your boyfriend? Last time we spoke there was some things going on.”

Since I was driving, I sent her a series of audio texts, explaining myself.

EXCERPT: “Since I forgave him, and he’s really trying, I decided to change my attitude. I had to change the way I was approaching him and life because everything was getting me down. I depressed. I was crying all the time. I was hurt all the time and we were arguing all the time. Something just clicked. I don’t know why, I don’t know how. I thank God that it happened. I didn’t want to feel that way anymore. I didn’t feel hopeless, but I felt worthless. I decided to be happy and it’s working. Just for your knowledge (and I guess the knowledge of my 4 readers) I really want to be with him and I knew the way I was approaching him was not going to give me that end result. He was going to leave me.”

MIND YOU: He has never said if I don’t change he’s going to leave. However, there is but so much badgering a person can take.

EXCERPT CONT: “It was like I was fulfilling a prophecy I didn’t want to come true. The change has been recent. I decided - this is who he is. There are things I don’t like about him, but I also think it’s a man thing. You have to sometimes tell them.”

Then I go into a quick example - here’s what happened: I went on vacation for a week. When I returned home, a fuse blew at the apartment and all of my food in the fridge spoiled. I mean it was hot and bugs were growing, so the fuse tripped probably at the start of my trip. Anywho, I tell my boyfriend because he’s my best friend and I tell him everything. His replies to me were “that’s crazy. I’m so sorry. damn babe..” Etc. But he never offered help. THAT incensed me, because I’m like dude, you eat here practically every day, why don’t you offer to help me? I had made up my mind that if he didn’t offer to help, I was going to leave him.

FELLAS: This is really how women think and you never know how close you come to being left on a daily. I’m not saying it’s your fault. I’m just saying, pay better attention.

I don’t think me wanting to leave him because he didn’t offer to help me was fair to him. Mind you, I am a woman who always gets shit done. I don’t know how but I figure out a way, always. He knows this. So in his mind, I don’t think he would even think to offer help, because I always figure it out. Not saying it’s right, just saying that’s what it is.

Then I thought about unfair it was to him. Also, I was so stressed out and probably wasn’t thinking clearly on the verge of tears. So I asked him, listen, can you give me money for groceries. Actually what I said was: I feel weird asking this, however if I don’t ask, I won’t know. Can you give me money for groceries? And his response was “of course.”

To think, a few minutes prior, I was thinking about leaving him. I am learning that I can’t assume someone knows my situation, and this includes him.

I couldn’t continue trying to have him live up to this expectation, when he had no clue what I was expecting of him. There I vowed to change. I feel lighter and easier. I feel better, Our relationship is better. We talk more. We talk to each other which is one of the reasons why I am able to choose to be happy.

I ended the messages to her saying: I feel proud of how far we’ve come. He and I, we’ve come far and we’re both willing to make it work...regardless of the mistakes.

Let me remind you, I haven’t spoken to her in a few months. I knew her situation and how she was getting away from it. I understood where she was coming from and knew what she felt she had to do to get to happy. However, I didn’t know that my story about my rotten food was going to make her tear up.

IN A NUTSHELL: Women who have had to be strong their entire lives, have a hard time relying on anyone. And when someone wants to help, genuinely help, we always think there’s an underlying reason and we are leery. This is the toxicity of women that we refuse to discuss. We take on so much that we don’t let men be men and then wonder why they leave us. Well, we show them time and again we don’t need them and men need to feel needed. It’s the Masculine/Feminine that we have give and get. Men need to be needed and women need to be wanted. Not through any fault of their own. This is where Daddy issues and generational curses come into play. But this is where we are in this story.

So she explains to me what’s been happening in her life and the fact that I am choosing to be happy and letting the past be the past and forgiving and allowing myself to be forgiven, all to be happy, she had some giving up of herself to do too.

Mind you, when I asked “Are you happy?” I had no idea what was happening in her life. I just knew she was starting a new one. I was genuinely curious to know if she was happy with the choices she made. I mean, I am nosy that way. I didn’t know how deep of an impact those words can have on another human. Especially, when one has been so unhappy for a long time. You sometimes have to sit back and really think about what’s being asked. Something as simple as asking, “Are you happy?” can cause a person to reevaluate their lives.

I ended up telling her, I guess this is MY purpose in your life. To push you forward. To check in from time to time and make sure you get to happy. Whether it’s uprooting your family and moving to another state. Saying YES to that man, because you’ve been hurt so many times before. Saying NO to someone you love because they hurt you, etc.

I don’t know if this is my purpose in life. To tell the stories from my perspective and my experiences. Maybe someone is going through something similar and needs to know they aren’t alone. Please note, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

From the bottom of my heart, I hope my blog, at the very least helps someone feel like they are not alone. We are all human and go through things in our lives that make us question “What is my purpose?” Maybe your purpose is to guide someone else. This doesn’t have to be literal in response. I hope you all live your purpose.

Thanks for reading.

XOXO

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