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sukugo · 6 days

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sukuna and gojo use binding vows for sex, taking things like orgasm denials or touch deprivation steps further, where the other is contractually bound to not be able to do certain things, like touch themselves or touch the other etc etc

one such instance being a vow where gojo has a vibrator up his ass, but he can't touch himself or remove it, until sukuna specifically, pulls it out.

he keeps the vibe in throughout the day, with sukuna controlling it remotely, even as they both go throughout their separate days.

gojo goes to have his usual breakfast, and meets yuuji at the dining room, they greet and sit next to each other. yuuji is, as always, energetic and excited to see him

they make conversation, until gojo gives a jolt and starts twitching and huffing. sukuna has turned the vibrator up all the way. yuuji worries and panics and asks him what's wrong. gojo gives a breathy laugh and reassures him. he motions low and tells yuuji about the vibrator inside him, through sudden jolts and soft whimpers.

satoru complains about it, and yuuji advices to remove it or go and take care of himself.

except gojo states that he can’t and yuuji puzzles.

"it's... a pact—mmh!"

"a pact???" yuuji's voice rises in volume, but he visibly calms, shoulders dropping into a fond sigh. "sensei, you really are..." that's all he can manage to say. reprimand is useless. gojo likes it, yuuji is well aware, he is enjoying every second of this, even as he complains.

gojo gives a few odd jolts, undoubtedly an odd pattern of intensity from the vibe, yuuji can guess. sudden irregular ups and downs that are not taken well by the man.

satoru clicks his tongue. "what is that guy doing?" he actually looks irritated for a moment—a look yuuji doesn’t get to see often—until it’s broken with a sigh and his pleased, calm demeanor returns, mimicking the soft waves of pleasure across his thighs.

still, yuuji can see his hands crumpled at his sides, undoubtedly wishing to use them.

that's when satoru perks flares up all of a sudden.

"actually, yuuji,” he turns to look at him, grinning. “you can help me" he opens his legs and lifts the edges of his kimono, his dick peeking out the fabric. yuuji gulps at the sight. satoru motions to it, giving yuuji a wordless look. yuuji hesitates for a moment, but complies, taking his hand to the cock, and starts stroking.

satoru crumbles under the touch, immediately breathing out his nose and muffling moans. he leans into yuuji, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, fingers clasped in yuuji's kimono, nuzzling into his hair and whining in his ear.

satoru's sounds fluctuate in pitch and volume, making it known when his vibe's gotten stronger. yuuji keeps his pace and satoru spills in his hand. he twitches and sighs, soft breaths against yuuji's flushed ear.

yuuji stares at the cum in his hand.

"you can wipe it on me,” satoru tells him with a breath that's calmed much too fast. “my clothes are already soiled anyways". and yuuji feels bad for it, but he obeys nonetheless.

satoru takes a hand to yuuji's chin and turns his face to him and gives him a kiss. short and sweet.

"as a reward." he smiles at yuuji. the boy surprises but takes it happily, cheeks warm and eyes softened, albeit a bit timidly. a tinge of disappointment colors the edges of his face.

"you want more?" satoru brings his face to yuuji's again. the vibrations have reached a slight plateau, so his voice is steadier.

yuuji’s face widens a bit, but he nervously chuckles, pulling back from gojo's face. "no, it's alright," he lies. "i don't want sukuna to kill me"

but satoru’s already pulling into him, breathing into his lips. "i won't let him <3"

"that's...actually reassuring......" yuuji’s eyes flutter shut as satoru's lips meet his again.

and with that, they're kissing and slowly the vibrations and gojo’s twitching start again. satoru moves atop yuuji's lap to straddle him, and while they kiss, yuuji takes his hand between them and jerks him off again. satoru moans and gasps into his mouth, each jolt mirroring the pulses against his prostate.

they separate for gojo to bury his face in yuuji's shoulders, arms hugging his neck. he humps into yuuji's hand until he comes against him again.

he pants and huffs atop the boy, catching his breath. yuuji's gentle arms hold him, fingers rubbing slow circles at his back.

satoru's breathing calms against yuuji’s neck.

"yuuji, u're such a good boy."

yuuji's heart and dick swell.

#f.txt #scenario that has been plaguing my brain and i needed to share #just when they're done nobara and megumi come into the dining room #nobara twists her face. 'geh. itadori. taking advantage of a married man'#yuuji squints his eyes at her 'like u're one to talk'#nobara: still. at the breakfast table. could u be any more shameless #she says that but still makes her away to sit across them megumi following suit #megumi: go easy on him. it’s probably gojo-sensei’s doing anyways #gojo: oh megumi~ u know me so well #jjk #sukugo #yuugo #悠五 #sukugoyuu #ns4w #the moment of random ups and downs is sukuna drawing out “satoru” in the vibrrator app bc he wants his gojo :c #meanwhile gojo's all irritated like 'what is wrong with him 😑' bby boy ur husband MISSES U #for context this is in my post-canon everyone lives au (well. one of them) where everything is good and happy and sukugo get married and #sukuna gets domesticated (?)#well more like. he's still bad and evil. but he's tamed i guess #he (begrudgingly) coexists with everyone else and behaves lmao #also everyone kinda lives together? it's a bit of a weird situation idk #anyways #this kinda made me want to write again. i havent written in so long #tho i suppose this does count as writing #i also have more stuff to add to this ill do some rbs !!

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dontworrybabymp3 · 2 months

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whatever this was from The Beach Boys’ 1969 Paris concert

#i really need to sit down and watch this concert in full #i was skipping around and this happened right before good vibrations #bruce at the end!! lmao!!#this is the show where he made the car noises at the start of i get around #and scared bruce lol #also carl is really hot in this show. who said that.#the beach boys

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twisting-in-wonderland · 10 months

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CONGRATS ON 'WINNING', VIL! :]

...

... And... Rook--

(thanks to everyone who voted, lol-- it was fun! (this was the funniest outcome tbh- Pomefiore win!! :]

there's some extra stupid doodles i speedran, whilst rushing this art, under the read more--)

Vil is Fuming-

(also shout out to Idia's early lead, i couldn't stop laughing about it at first-

alsoalsooo, i thought that particular reblog was really funny, i'm all about Jade propaganda - let him have all the free time he wants :'[

-- but if the reblogger doesn't want me posting that then tell me pls! )

#twst #twisted wonderland #vil schoenheit #rook hunt #art #ram's art #i. wanted to post this earlier but tumblr was down for me rip #anywayyysss the art was speedran in one sitting sry if it looks bad lol #this was my first time drawing the pomfiore dorm uniform and. why is it Like That.......................#:[ the sleeves are a major pain 0/10 :[#also i've found a great joy in drawing rook as stupidly as possible #yes btw i voted for lilia and malleus lmao - i don't dislike any main twst character so i just picked ones i dont vibe with the most lol #the only dia student i truly like is sebek - he's such. a Guy you know? shouty boy very good 10/10 i root for him every minute #if you need me to type out any of my handwriting btw tell me-------

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kindheartedgummybears · 3 months

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you wanna know what??

I am

TIRED

of overmasculinized werewolves!!!!

I WANNA SEE A

WEREWOLF

WALKING AROUND IN A CVNTY LITTLE OUTFIT!!! WALKING THE STREETS!!!! DISEMBOWELING CREATURES!!!!

I WANNA SEE WEREWOLVES COVERED IN BLOOD AND GORE WHILE WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND CROPTOP WITH HELLO KITTY ON IT!!!!

I WANNA SEE A WEREWOLF WALKING AROUND IN COTTAGE AND FAIRY AND PRINCESS CORE OUTFITS!!!!!! WITH A DEAD MANGLED RABBIT IN ITS MOUTH!!!!

AND MAKE THE WEREWOLF

D I S G U S T I N G ! ! !

#i am TIRED of seeing all these manly man werewolves that are all copy and paste white boys #I am TIRED of seeing all these woman werewolves being butch and masculine(also mostly white) or submissive!!!#I WANNA SEE SOME PLUS-SIZE WEREWOLVES I WANNA SEE SOME BLACK ASIAN LATINO MIDDLE EASTERN NON WHITE WEREWOLVES!!!!! THAT ARNT F3TIZIED!!!!!#I WANNA SEE A G I R L WEREWOLF THATS INTO “G I R L Y” THINGS!!!!! LET THE WEREWOLF BE A SLVT!!!!!#LET THE WEREWOLF BE IN THE TRADITIONAL CLOTHING OF ITS CULTURE!!!!#AND RIP AND TEAR AND MAUL AND CRY IN THE MORNING AFTER DOING ALL OF IT!!!! RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#no but fr can we werewolf fans like. actually sit down and reflect on the inherent misogyny of werewolves??? ESPECIALLY IN MEDIA #like. almost EVERY. SINGLE. WEREWOLF. in movies and shows and stuff are always a buff white man with anger and trust issues #and on the rare occasion that there *is* a woman werewolf shes always either over masculine or “weaker” than the “stronger alpha male” were #olf and only seen as a mate. AND shes always “calmer” and “maternal” and “calms the alpha male down🥺🥺”.AND she never has an actually good #werewolf form its always either wolf tail and ears or full wolf. or if it *is* actually a decent werewolf her transformation is offscreen.#like whyyyyyyyyyyyyy are people so scared to make women go ape shit?????? werewolves are NOT pretty creatures!!!! STOP MAKING THEM PRETTY!!#(lmao jk we know why they're so scared hashtag male gaze)#like yes. werewolves ARE pretty but not in the “dog show 30k$ poodle” kind of way i see some people making them(not that that's bad tho)#AND ALSO LIKE. ARE WE JUST GOING TO PRETEND WEREWOLVES LITERALLY WEREN'T MADE FOR WOMEN AND MINORITIES???#like. once a month someone turns into a raging bloodthirsty unstoppable beast driven by the moon and instincts with an insatiable hunger an #need to hide away from people due to them wanting to kill you or fearing you simply because you're a werewolf. they don't know you. they ju #t see you as a creature that might hurt them. constantly being hunted down to be killed simply for existing.#WHAT PART OF THAT SCREAMS: “ah yes. White man.”#IK theres going be people(men and pick mes) that see this post and think “this bitch is overreacting” and tbh idc.the girls who get it get #the girls who dont dont.#anyways shout out to Ginger Snaps trick or treat and every other piece of media or fan piece with disgusting non-f3tiszied woman/poc werewo #i love yall #*smooch smooch*#Werewolves #Werewolf #Lycanthrope #Lycanthropy #Werewolf AU #Yeah. Im tagging that too. I see yall.

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skitskatdacat63 · 7 months

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Boy King Seb :D

#thank you to Grace for the idea of making his chivarly collar red bull instead <33333 #he was gonna have both collars but then making that one made me suffer so no not today #this was a lot of fun but also made me suffer. but i keep looking at it and being like AAAHHHHH BABY!!! BABY BOY!!!!!!!#can you believe i tried to do this in one night? i cant #i stopped and came back to it and was like 'no way you could do this in one sitting at 1 am'#this is kinda the ascended form of that very first sketch i made for this au! concentrated boy king sebby!!!#i say to myself i need to take a break from drawing complicated things but youll prob see a nando version of this in less than a week ;;;#okay about the drawing(i wrote good tags and then tumblr deleted them so these are a bit inferior AGH):#this is typical pouty seb but is also referenced off a specific pic from AD 2009(beloved)#its very important to me how emotionally open Seb is. im not sure the specific context of this. maybe after a triumph?#but instead of being that typical stoic serious detached kind of ruler; i like him being openly emotional(think AD 2010)#its important as well for his dichotomy with nando and how they choose to portray themselves #seb is very assured in himself and his rule vs. nando who is more insecure and bitter about his #so nando takes strides to portray himself in that more stoic calculating way bcs he feels like it helps him legitimize himself better #whereas seb has absolutely no care for outward public image and shows how he feels and is loved for it(nando hates it but loves it)#not that nando cant be fun and whimsical!! but to me he always seems a bit more mysterious; like i can never tell his true thoughts tbh #anyways i feel like ill finish 10 more drawings before i end up posting the lore pt 2 LMAO #its just a lot harder to organize and layout compared to part 1 which was just an explanation #pt2 would be a mix of more world building/characterization/anecdotes ive talked about with mutuals(LOVE YOU GUYS!!!)#i have a *lot* of ideas (gotta whip out my notes app every once in a while to write down stuff abt it) just hard to put into a coherent pos #sebastian vettel #f1 #formula 1 #f1 art #formula 1 art #f1 fanart #formula 1 fanart #catie.art.#*ill prob make a process post later if anyone is curious!! its fun to write abt my process and influences and such #boy king au

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essektheylyss · 1 year

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Is there any Essek scene in particular you’re hoping is included in the show?

Oh man oh god oh fuck. This list could go on SO long.

To be fair, the thing with Essek is that there are a lot of very small and fun but not narratively load-bearing scenes, and then a few major scenes that have a decent amount of narrative weight to them. For instance, the first study scene (the second is important but could be combined into it if that the pace required it), the Scourger incident, the dinner, and most of episode 97 have a lot of narrative impact, either for Caleb's arc or for the plot as a whole. I've already suggested I need to see the ninth floor tower conversation animated like a fish needs water to breathe, and I'd love both the times Essek physically pulls Caleb out of danger, of course.

There's also a lot of wiggle room in how you pace the Nein and break up their arcs (which I think was more rigid translating campaign 1 to LoVM—even when arcs are shifted around, the sequences of events are kept somewhat orderly) which means that speculation is pretty hard, particularly when it comes to Essek, who meets the Nein so far into the campaign. Basically, any of these things might not be as narratively necessary by then, depending on what they choose to cut or focus in on. I could speculate on that, and I'm sure I will extensively, but at a certain point I might as well just write a series worth of scripts as a fun side project.

That being said, I do really hope the Scourger scene remains, because it is so cinematically interesting, and I do consider it a major turning point between the wizards, regardless of either of them realizing it at the time or not.

And I also really want to watch him have a panic attack over whiskey cocoa. It is in no way load-bearing, but nonetheless, I would like to see it, and I think I deserve it.

#there IS actually something to be said about the narrative weight of essek having a panic attack while guzzling spiked hot cocoa but #I've talked about that elsewhere #this is for vibes lmao #thank you for the ask! it also reminded me I did get an ask about tone the other day and have not had a chance to answer yet #thank you to everyone who has taken my bait and allowed me to chatter about my boi this series and adaptation literally my fave topics #mighty nein animated #essek thelyss #oh boy I am tempting myself with the concept of just sitting down and writing a series worth of scripts for lulz.#I have done it before and I should Not do it again but boyyyyy do I kinda wanna #tbt the time my professor told me my thesis project was pointless cuz I couldn't use it as a writing sample. I'm still just.#excuse me ma'am. LOVE HER. great screenwriter. but oh my god what if I just want to PRACTICE. hello.#I did in fact write 600 pages of script out of spite cuz of that. so yanno. again. I could fully do this just for kicks.

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hirazuki · 2 years

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I said I wasn’t going to do the thing, but, eventually, inevitably, (and I’m sure you’re all shocked) I did the thing. My curiosity is insatiable and will be the death of me.

Thoughts under the cut!

Okay, we’re going to bullet list this shit, because otherwise it’s just going to be a stream of consciousness nightmare.

Rights

So, first off. The decision to deal with content that they can’t talk about or show continues to baffle me. In what world can you successfully tell a story which is one hundred percent reliant on the setup (i.e., events and characters that preceded it)... that you can’t touch because of copyright??? Name dropping silmarils and Feanor and Gondolin or whatever the fuck, randomly, isn’t going to magically glue things together and make it work; it’s just going to irritate the people who are watching who have knowledge of the Legendarium, and simply utterly confuse everyone else. I still maintain that, had they wanted to play around in Middle-Earth, they should have just created a completely original story, populated with completely original characters, with a canon character popping in for a cameo here and there as Easter eggs for funsies.

Adaptation

No adaptation is going to be exactly like the source material except some incredibly rare gems of anime, almost always produced by Studio Bones, so I don’t think most of us going in really expected to experience The-Silmarillion-On-Screen. But I feel like the audience expecting a good story -- even if the story breaks from canon -- is like. not irrational. The bar is so low. I would have been sufficiently placated with a good story. Not even an exceptional one; just something with solid characters, a sensible plot, and a sense of adventure a la Tolkien. Something, even, in just the spirit of Tolkien. That’s it. Apparently, that’s too much to ask for lmao.

Story

I have... So. Many. Questions. Primarily about the reasoning behind a lot of this junk. Buckle in.

That was the most bizarre and cursory retelling of the events of the Years of the Trees and the First Age. Imagine Feanor getting left out just like that XDD

Why are we sailing into Valinor????? Galadriel herself, specifically, rejected the pardon of the Valar twice; she was like, nope, I’m good, not going back. Why would Gil-galad force her to go? Why does Gil-galad have any kind of power, political or otherwise, over her, she has her own realm to rule?? Why isn’t she in that realm, with her husband and daughter? I don’t get the motivations behind anything here.

Jumping off of a ship that close to Aman... thinking she’s going to swim back to Endor? That’s so dumb I can’t even.

Why are the elves fading in the Second Age???????

Don’t even get me started on the mithril shit. What is this, a drug? Are you going to compound it into pills, take twice daily with food? Wtf?? Fine dwarven mithril, direct from Khazad-dum, my friends, was not some kind of new, unheard of, miracle substance; it existed prior to this Age, and was also found in Numenor and Aman. Yes, Khazad-dum had the monopoly on it in Middle-Earth, but it was common knowledge and the whole reason the Noldor settled in Ost-in-Edhil was because of that mithril, and wanting to trade with the dwarves for it to use it in their crafts. It was no secret.

... the lost silmaril, are you fucking kidding me. All three are accounted for! Is this a fourth silmaril? Why is it in a tree?? Why is this random apocryphal elf battling with a balrog like this, why is Glorfindel being cannibalized again?? This poor dude, can’t catch a break in any adaptation from people tearing his role in any Age apart and handing it out to other characters. Also, mithril is a precious metal that, yes, is extremely valuable and unique, but it’s just. a. metal. Not some spooky supernatural thing. Ugh.

Why oh why is Galadriel in Numenor lmao. Wtf even is this timeline. Why are Numenoreans anti-elf and why is their primary concern the job market??? Why are they trying to sail into the West pre-Zigur?? Why are the palantiri lost before the island sinks? What the fuuuuuuck.

Why does Elendil have a third child???

[side note: I’ve seen multiple articles calling Mairon Melkor’s “son” and I just XD I feel like like both parties would have so much to say about that. Like. So much. ANYWAY]

I liked Arondir enough, up until the moment he called the tiny human settlement made of stone and wood in the wide open plain the most “defensible” spot. Bro. There... there is nothing defensible about this. The entire segment of the battle against the orcs, actually, was very painful to experience, in terms of strategy (or rather, the lack thereof). People’s actions and decisions made absolutely no sense. Except for Waldreg; yeah, me too, buddy.

(Incidentally, why did an entire fort come crumbling down as a result of some rope???? Perhaps I missed something; oh wait! I must have, it was too fucking dark to see anything properly in the first place!)

Also, why is Bronwyn wearing that blue when no one else is? Expensive blue dye? Spaghetti strap dress? It’s like a really cheap game of pick out the Important Character amongst this rabble.

I’ll bet you anything that the inspiration for the Stranger was that one instance when Olorin came back as Gandalf the White, and it took him a moment and an interaction with Aragorn to ground himself and remember his previous life, and they were like, let’s take that and put it on steroids -- i.e., we’re gonna make him not remember how to use his limbs, how to use words, he’s gonna be mute and dumb until the final episode until SUDDENLY he can speak in elaborate sentences and riddles >.> If this is how the Valar send their Maiar to Middle-Earth, they are even bigger jackasses than I have always considered them to be lmao. He is a MAIA, why would he show up naked and then wear rags????? Like, this is a perfect example of what I mean when I say that they disrespect the characters; it’s so demeaning. Hobo!Olorin; for fuck’s sake.

I can’t with the balrog, y’all, it’s literally one rock wall separating them, they clearly were trying to making this suspenseful and dramatic but it falls so very flat because it’s not even that deep.

Love that the Numenoreans just landed in the exact spot where one (1) tiny human village in all of the southern portion of Middle-Earth is under attack, and they were able to immediately go to their rescue. They didn’t even try; no runner, no messenger, no finding some hapless soul in a field to direct them where to go. It’s so bad.

Orodruin has an on/off switch, guys! Too bad Mairon forgot to turn it off when he moved back in, in the Third Age, would have saved himself a lot of trouble if there had been no active lava to throw the ring in XDDD Jesus X_X

Pyroclastic flow, you can survive it, believe it. My god.

Celeborn name-dropping was so very random. Seven episodes in, suddenly she remembers she has a husband! Time spent looking for Sauron: 200+ years. Time spent looking for missing husband: ... zero? She was on her way into the West without ever looking for him and the reason she turned back around is because she felt her work here was still unfinished, not, “oh maybe I should look for my husband and daughter”? Also, we just have to rip off Luthien and Beren, huh.

Mordor to Lindon in six days!!!!!!!! What are those horses on, I want some too XD (it’s like... 800-ish miles, in a direct line, not accounting for mountain ranges and ravines and the like, where you’d have to find a way around. Even considering that elven steeds are super-horses -- so let’s say they can do 40 miles/day -- and pretend they don’t need to use roads and can fly over insurmountable passes, that should still be a journey of no less than 20 days; it’s across the entire fucking continent).

Sure, yeah, he’s a Maia so obviously a “mortal wound” isn’t gonna kill him, so he made the journey just fine. But she didn’t know that, yet she pushed the journey until he was visibly falling off his horse; callous, much??? What a bitch :D

Galadriel, in favor of ringmaking?????? Celebrimbor being proud and fond of his Feanorian blood (in public, to a complete stranger, no less)? Who are these people HELP.

WHY ARE WE GIVING TYELPE’S STORYLINE TO HER HASN’T SHE GIRLBOSSED ENOUGH

Fuck the 9 and the 5, I guess? The whole point is that they were made before... not after... because otherwise the subjugation wouldn’t woooooork. Oof.

Wow. 400+ years of living together, working together, and all the entanglements that brings, reduced to... what was it? 3 weeks? 3 months? I want. to. cry.

I just. Who looks at the Silmarillion and goes, “you know what this could use? MORE DRAMA.” Like, everyone is more than dramatic enough without adding a whole bunch of new dynamics in established relationships lmao.

I think that’s my main complaint, actually. First/Second Age is already essentially a family soap opera, but RoP has injected so much melodrama into it that it makes it completely tasteless. They’re changing not only major plot points but character dynamics and relationships... for what? To what end?? What is the purpose??? It’s certainly not effective story-telling, that’s for sure.

OH I forgot the harfoot storyline. Well. That goes to show what I think about it lmao. I get the sentiment behind it but the execution is so poorly done, it just doesn’t do it for me at all. It was just so piece-meal and shoddy and random -- what was even the point of the three sorcerers??

Dialogue

It’s just so bad. There’s the purple prose that runs circles around itself trying to make itself sound deep and Tolkien-ish, but is ultimately empty and means nothing (”why does a rock sink but a ship doesn’t” are you fucking kidding me, with word-smithing like that no wonder Mairon sang you into the ground and you deserve it). There’s the forced call-backs to the text/movies (”follow your nose,” “a gift,” etc.) that are shoved in there for Nostalgia and Relevance and feel awfully out of place. And then, my favorites: the really dumb one-liners that completely break whatever meagre atmosphere the series managed to set (“knife-ears” -- what is this, Dragon Age?! “the elves will take your jobs” -- like, really bro? are you serious?? “I’m good” -- ouch, that was so unspeakably cringe).

The single exception is Adar’s dialogue; idk if someone different was writing him and his storyline or what, but this is way more like Tolkien. And, sadly, seeing that they can write like this, makes the rest of the series even worse.

Also the choices of when/where to use Quenya vs. Sindarin... I’m so confused.

Costuming

...... what. the. fuck. Like, all of it, really, but the armor is especially... unfortunate. It’s just so poor, in concept and execution. I was wondering why the layers of mail were moving so weirdly, but at first I didn’t believe it when someone said that the mail worn under the breastplate, bracers and pauldrons by the Numenoreans is actually just the armor design printed onto long-sleeved shirts. Looking at it more closely since then... I really think they’re right, which is just yikes. I’m usually extremely forgiving in this department if the plot and tone are right, especially if it is a low-budget production (have y’all seen the costumes from Voyage of the Unicorn?? One of my favorite tv series. No joke. 100% adore the costuming too, as it fits the vibe and everything is clearly done just for the joy of it). But knowing they spent $60 million per episode, and it still turned out like this? That’s just gross. (And apparently the person who did the costuming is the same person who did the costumes for Crimson Peak, which I haven’t watched but the costumes are incredible... what a waste of her talent).

Also, the hair loss. Yes. Absolutely. It 100% detracts from the image, sorry. And I’m not talking only about the elves. The dwarven women got the short end of the stick, too.

It’s the presentation, primarily, what the costuming does for the presentation of the characters (or what it doesn’t do, in this case). Galadriel should not have to pull her hair back and expose her ears in order for people to identify her as an elf; she should be ethereal and faerie and otherworldly and immediately distinguishable from those around her, as all elves should. Everyone is just so. bogged down in the mortal muck. It’s so disappointing. If you look at cast photos from the LotR and Hobbit movies, the difference between the cast in costume and the cast wearing their day to day clothing is like a punch to the face; here, everyone looks like they stepped off of the street and onto the set :/

Again, the exception seems to be Adar. He’s by far the most Tolkien-looking of all the characters, and definitely gives off First Age survivor vibes even from just the way he looks, and I really don’t understand why they chose to not to let a similar aesthetic guide the appearance of the rest of the elven cast. It’s baffling.

Casting

XDDDD

I mean. I don’t even know what to say. A good portion of why everyone looks so ugly is absolutely the costuming and makeup work and I do think that even just longer hair would improve them a great deal, but there are certain characters that have been so horribly mis-cast, namely Elrond, Gil-galad and Celebrimbor. They just don’t vibe as the characters. And, speaking as a complete non-shipper, if Tyelpe looked like that, I firmly believe that Mairon would have skipped Ost-in-Edhil altogether; he’d have taken one look and been like, yeah, no thanks, I’ll pass. Like, why does he look like he’s about to croak??? This is supposed to be the elves at the height of their power in Eregion! And he’s Feanor’s grandson, he’s not that old!!! He was only two-thousand something years old when he died!!! Galadriel has a couple of centuries on him at least. (My most heartfelt sympathies to the Silvergifting folks, btw; Tyelpe did not become a banner for this utter nonsense).

I really enjoyed the idea of Disa and Arondir. Truly. And the actors did give it their all, which is really the only thing saving their characters, in my opinion. But I do think that they were done a disservice as well, in being associated with the rest of this. I’m all for diverse casting (though, can’t help but note the lack of Asian representation in a series that is patting itself on the back for diversity), but aside from these two, everyone else was just... very token-ish. Caricature-ish, to the point of being insulting. What was with the accents from Rhun??? As someone from the part of the world that that was inspired by, I was cringing. I honestly don’t know if I’ll be able to watch season 2 if Rhun is going to be a big focus and they insist on presenting it like this. Idk, the casting choices definitely gave off the vibe of Representation™ for the sake of Brownie Points instead of actually being inclusive, and it left such a bad taste in my mouth. I know they’re gonna drag Khamul into this mess, I know it, but I’m fervently wishing him a very I-hope-you-don’t-get-included

Music

There are some good moments, a couple of bars that woke me up here and there, but ultimately forgettable. It’s not awful, but it is terribly mediocre, and from a composer whose other work I have enjoyed, that’s just really very sad (I guess this series brought out the worst in everyone???)

Galadriel

Where to fucking start

She’s really just a very painful example of people, yet again, thinking “Strong female character” means unlikable bitch who is in everyone’s face and listens to no one because she is StRonK.

Ugh. Commander who has no respect from her men? Who doesn’t even bother to work with her men?

Yes, obviously she’s younger in the Second Age than the Third Age, no. shit. She’s not who the Fellowship meets in Lothlorien, not yet, she’s still growing into that person. Obviously she has serious scars from the First Age and before. She participated in the First Kinslaying. She was called Nerwen, and regularly participated in athletic feats. She crossed the Helcaraxe. She refused the Valar’s pardon twice. She fought and she lost so much. But just because you want to portray her as younger, as angry or vengeful or whatever (which is fine! she was!) does not mean that she is a brat or that she is inelegant or that she is dumber than a brick.

She picks a quarrel with everyone she speaks to. “You have not seen what I’ve seen” -- to Elrond. Elrond. His father became a star and his mother became a bird and he never saw either one again and he was taken in and raised by the very people who slaughtered his kin (multiple times, I might add; two separate instances), and then his only brother, his twin, chose the life of a Man instead of an elf and then died. Like. lady; please. She would never, ever be so crass.

They make her so naive, so stupid -- simply because otherwise the plot as they have written it would not be able to unfold, because the choices she makes to move the plot along are dumb as fuck -- and it is infuriating.

She says shit like “sometimes you have to trust in the design of the powers that be” -- is this the same person who left literal paradise because she wanted a realm of her own to rule and didn’t want to be subservient and beholden to greater powers, and wanted to determine her life for herself?

She is such a child. Elendil compares her to his teenage children. His mortal, teenage children. That’s... not a good look lmao.

Also, don’t get me started on her swordsmanship. All the combat choreography is dismal, but especially the sequence of her “teaching” in Numenor is very painful to me, as a swordsman. Oy.

Elrond & Celebrimbor

Why is Elrond a dwarf friend (: Why isn’t Celebrimbor the dwarf friend (: (: (: Where is Narvi (: (: (: (: The doors, what doors, oh the doors of Moria, the doors that were specifically crafted by an elf and a dwarf (those being Celebrimbor and Narvi) and stand testament to their friendship, those doors? Bleh.

WHY ARE WE HAVING ELROND SWEAR AN OATH

WHY ARE OATHS BEING PASSED OFF AS NOT A BIG DEAL I’m pretty sure there’s an entire story somewhere about how serious an oath can be...

Why are things (oaths, silmarils) that were resolved in the First Age and left behind in the First Age, being dredged up again here????? I want to scream.

Ah, yes, Galadriel, the one who took in a just-orphaned Elrond. Fuck Maglor, I guess???? He didn’t single-parent two orphans in the face of the Oath to be disrespected like this.

I just. I don’t understand how Celebrimbor can NOT be the focus of a show called RINGS OF POWER. His importance has been relegated to a footnote. It would be like Feanor being a side character in a show called SILMARILS. It’s absurd.

Elrond’s relationship with Galadriel is. so weird. It’s got such a weird vibe. They’re not comrades-in-arms. They’re not friends, not like buddy-buddy. They’re related in three separate ways if I recall correctly; they’re cousins through two different lines, and then -- more importantly -- she’s his mother-in-law. Why is he treating her like a sibling????

Gil-galad

Oh, Ereinion. Last High King of the Elves and Retainer of Long Locks ;_; The harpers will sing even more sadly of him now, I guess. Why does he look like a disgraced Roman governor out of Asterix who fell out of favor in the capital and is living out his days in discontent in the provinces? He somehow escaped the great shearing, but still looks awful minor nitpick, given everything else going on, but why is his hair black? he’s one of the few characters whose hair-color we explicitly know More pressingly, why does he act like it?? Fair and free realm my ass, they’re drowning in angst here and Annatar hasn’t even shown up yet lmao. Does someone on the team have a personal dislike for him? Tolkien was sparse on details, sure, and the First and Second Ages were absolutely rife with politics, but there is no reason to make him a smarmy, conniving politician and an idiot to boot.

Mairon

My boy, my love, the very personification of perfectionism and obsessive-compulsive tendencies and creative license, embodiment of the themes of the artistic struggle, of creation and destruction as two sides of the same coin, independence and freedom and binding and subjugation wrapped up all in one complex fiery being... I’m gonna need a whole separate post for you. My grief knows no bounds, my tears are innumerable T____T

There’s a lot more I can say, and I know there’s a lot I left out, but my hands and brain are tired now lol.

tl;dr Tbh I would have been content with a show about random OCs in Middle-Earth, rather than whatever they’re trying to do by twisting the plot like this. Like, keep the storyline with Arondir and Bronwyn (but just... make their actions and dialogue have common sense lmao), navigate elf/human relations in the Second Age through them. Keep Adar and the nuanced interpretation of Orcs and explore the original creation of Orcs, and how a mutilated elf from the First Age deals with survival like that. Hell, throw in Celebrian (who is mentioned by name in the Appendices; as is Glorfindel, incidentally) since we’re screwing with the timeline anyway -- you want a canon, strong, female protagonist? Here you go! We barely have any info on her, other than the bare bones -- create away! Incorporate her kidnapping by orcs, her torture, have her meet Adar, create moral conflict that way. Pepper in some Elrond and some Galadriel on the fringes, for a popularity boost, since we apparently need them for a Middle-Earth show to matter. Ta-da, boom, done.

It could have been good, y’all.

#the best thing i can say about this series is that it gave me the final no-fucks-given push to finally cosplay my boy #and to seriously sit down and work at some silm art #i've enjoyed silmarillion/first and second age fanart and fanfic my whole life but have never contributed myself because #i always felt that anything i made wouldn't be good enough #well #anything i put out can't possibly be worse than this lmao #should i tag this?#meh i'll tag it why not #in case people want to blacklist my sorrowful ramblings #anti rop #anti rings of power #(okay y'all i tried doing the conscientious thing and strictly tagging it as anti only but the way this site uses tags these days #is against me #no matter what i try it insists on putting it in the main tag so #apologies. i tried. i tried a million variations. just keep scrolling if it's not your cup of tea)

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514hockey · 7 months

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Marc-André Fleury is a legend

#lmao #marc-andre fleury said sit down boy #not all heroes wear capes #boooooo chicago #connor bedard #marc andre fleury

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brutal-nemesis · 1 year

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Yeehaw we gettin tagged by @whump-me (tyyyy) and posting 7 snippets from our writing (or wips but i am a wipless bastard atm 🤪) and i have decided to do some Silly Castys Moments (and also some Erebus stuff ig 🙄)

Warning for some gore probably it’s Nemi writing so yk but I’ll try to keep the really bad stuff outta here (there also some armputation and guy going crazy and starving to death over and over you know the drill)

1. Local silly guy does in fact regret it very much

“I don’t really want you, per se, but a certain…friend of yours.” Castys stiffened, and he heard a faint laugh. “I think you know who I’m talking about.”

“I really don’t. I’ve got a lot of friends, you know, and-” something slammed into the metal above him, cutting him off.

“Don’t play dumb with me; you know exactly who I’m talking about, and you’d better tell me where I can find him or I’ll make you regret it.”

“Please, do your worst. I already regret so many damn things so I don’t think another one on the pile will do much to me, to be honest,” Castys mused, wiggling against his bonds slightly.

2. The worst fmk in existence gets you stabbed

“Hey, guys, fuck, marry, kill for rice, pasta, and bread, go. I think for me, I gotta say fuck bread, marry rice, kill pasta. Don’t get me wrong, I love some noodles, some noods, but, like, man. Have you ever just, like, had some bread? Insane. I would fuck bread. I don’t wanna fuck anything, but boy I would fuck the bread. And rice, man, she’s so dependable, she’s always there for you. What I would want in a spouse if I wanted anything in a spouse. This game wasn’t really designed for me, and yet, here I am. So, c’mon, what’s it from you two? You’ve gotta have-Hey, Danny boy, got an opinion you’d like to share?” Castys smiled up at the man now standing in front of him.

Daniel rolled his eyes before putting his asshole face back on. “Just do something useful for once and hold this for me, vermin,” he said with a smile, lifting Castys’s shirt and gently sliding the knife he was holding into his abdomen. Castys just sighed, way too used to being stabbed to really care much about this.

3. Ripping your arm off but it’s a Phineas and Ferb reference (this one is probably the most gory of all the snippets fyi but it’s not too bad)

Sensing his chance, Castys grabbed the manacled wrist of his shredded arm with his good hand, bit down on the gag, and pulled. He couldn’t give up, couldn’t stop, not after enduring this much, he could feel his flesh tearing, sending out sparks of agony unlike anything he’d ever known, and he had to keep pulling, pulling and jerking and tearing and twisting and praying, praying that he could rip it off before he drowned again, which, hey, kind of a weird thing to want, not that he hadn’t had to amputate his own limbs before, but weird that it was happening again, and honestly, this hurt way more than the other times, but wasn’t that always the case-and fuck there was no way he was going to be able to just snap his bones like this, and he needed it to be completely severed, and there was no time, wedge it against the rocks and pull pull pull until there was a snap and a burst of unholy agony, so intense it almost smothered the relief, so fierce it made him forget he was drowning up until the moment his oxygen-starved brain lost consciousness.

4. Lmaoooo bitches trapped in a cell for like 200 years

Every three days. Thirst. Weakness. Dizziness. Death. Was it three days? Is that how long you could last without water? He tried to count, but the numbers got lost in the haze all too easily. There was no way to mark the stone, to keep track outside of his head, the blood wasn’t being washed off him anymore. He had nothing, nothing at all, just here and himself and the unyielding stone. The square of sunlight would move across the cell, the only motion to break the constancy of everything else. It was the same day repeated over and over and over and over and over and it was the same just the same nothing ever changed, ever, ever, it was the same-

Something wasn’t the same. The leather muzzle that had kept him silent for so long had been slowly rotting, and it finally fell off. For a moment he simply stared at it lying there on the ground, broken, dying, fading away. He opened his mouth for the first time in decades. And he screamed, because that thing got to rot away and disappear and he wouldn’t, he would always be here, hungry and thirsty and alone and trapped and alive and it wasn’t fair, not at all, and he screamed because it had been so long since he was able, he cried because it was all he could do.

5. Erebus’s iconic sit down protest ✨ (it does not accomplish anything in the end)

“You are coming with me. As of today you are my property, so you will do as I say. Resistance will only make things more difficult for you. So you will walk, or you will be dragged. Your choice.” Erebus initially felt a bolt of fear shoot through him, but looking down at her scrawny frame, he realized that she likely couldn’t carry out her threat.

Dragged? He’d like to see her try.

Erebus sat down on the ground and looked expectantly up at Neteri, one eyebrow raised. She huffed and narrowed her eyes. Planting her feet firmly on the ground, she tugged on the chain as hard as she could, but it did little more than make him lean forward. She sighed. “Okay, you have a point there.”

6. More Erebus and Neteri shenanigans because she’s right he’s being a drama queen

“You can’t just do that! That’s-you can’t just amputate my arm!”

“See, this is why I didn’t want to tell you. I knew you’d freak out.”

“Of-of course I’m freaking out! You want to cut off one of my limbs, for Drottkia’s sake!”

“I mean, yeah, but I’m going to give you a new one right away. So at the end of the day you’ll have the same number of arms you started with. It’s honestly not worth getting that worked up about.”

7. New phobia alert!! (warning for centipede on guy)

He felt it, it was on him, dozens of little legs pitter-pattering across his skin, crawling on him. “G-get it off. Neteri, please, please get it off.” It tickled the back of his neck, around the base of the section of skin she’d replaced. “What’s it doing Neteri plea-” she clamped a hand over his mouth, her thumb rubbing against his cheek as he whimpered.

“Shh, shh, you’re okay Erebus. I’m just seeing if it can connect to you, I promise I’ll take it off when I’m done.” Connect to him?! What-what did that mean-oh it had stopped crawling around it was just sitting there it was on his back what was it going to do to him what did connecting mean was it-Erebus felt a momentary pinch at the base of his neck, and suddenly his limbs starting moving, wriggling in the restraints all on their own. Neteri removed her hand from his mouth and looked down at him expectantly, her other hand still gripping his tightly even as his fingers twitched uncontrollably. “Are you doing that?”

“N-no I-I’m not moving I’m not doing that why are they doing that I can’t stop it is it doing that to me make it stop make it let go please-” Tears were streaming from Erebus’s eyes but he didn’t care he just wanted that thing off he wanted it gone he wanted control of his own body back he’d always had that even when he was tied up and strapped down he’d always had that-

And there we go hope that either a fun time on memory lane or at least made you laugh a little

Taggin uhhhh @galaxywhump @yet-another-heathen and @painsandconfusion (mainly because i know you will want to read the Castys content 💕)

#most people be sharing like real nice whump #and here i am with mostly sillies #some whump in there but yk #alright lets see what are my vibes for each thing #first one we got castys being a little silly and sassy i like how that slowly leaves him as the torture goes on in this one :)#writing that FMK was PAINFUL y'all i swear we all appreciate daniel stabbing castys's dumb ass #3rd one i just love that whole thing i'd been wanting to write the mega drowning piece for a while and it just came out real fun (❁´◡`❁)#last castys one at 4 he goes fucking NUTS lmao that whole thing is special to me im really proud of it #there are some descriptions im really proud of but the actual actions that are being implied are. uh. they're bad. so i left them out of thi #one letter too long huh. put an s at the end of that tag ty <333 #okay onto E&T shit look at erebus go sitting down like that's going to do anything. like yes you're a foot taller than her #but also. she is not the only one keeping you captive. idiot boy get fucked #armputation is fun and silly for all ages and he gets a new arm so whatever baby nothing lost!!!!#and lastly the envy demon shenanigans ✨ i just like how much he freaks out it's so festive #gold star if you read all of that and also my tags probably go eat bread or something dawg

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