#loaf screm

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

[id: drawing of wheelchair, one colored one line art. functionally described below. end id]

wheelchair design for original character n frame ended up being way too complicated n it going make me not want draw them much idk why did that

character is high support needs developmental disability n so typical style low back rest ultralight not enough hence chair is Not Like That. is in fantasy magical setting n magic bring some accessibility, n weight is non issue part because of that part because even most boring wheelchair w high back rest n headrest n etc going be heavy as fuck so some extra weight from decoration really not going matter.

frame is golden & swirly n decorated like those antique european royal chair/couches thingie

good ol big wheel forget draw push rim pretend it there

seat n back itself also in style of those antique royal chairs but in light blue. is tilted & has dump. has headrest n same color

have stroller style push handles bc those easier push for caregiver with one hand if they doing something on the other hand

have angel wing attached to back to seat that is power assist. controlled by angel halo like joystick & is right where usual right handed joystick is, tho can be removed n wear like bracelet n control movement that way for more dynamic flow

idea is can tilt in space can recline can elevate like CRT powerchairs despite manual chair style bc like look & hybrid better… still thinking about specifics of how do that but again magical setting most likely going be frame metal shifting n swirly swirl help w that

reblog ok but don’t repost without permission

#art #wheelchair #wheelchair user #artists on tumblr #digital art #digital illustration #mobility aid #loaf screm #🍞.txt #oc #original character

[loveisinthebat]

Scream Loaf

#Big Brown Bat #bats of North America #Bat of the day #Daily bat #bat #bats #batposting #Cute bats #cute Animals #You love to see them #I mean just look #Big screm #Loaf batto

[beardedmrbean]

Have a happy contented loaf

She sends rombles and more reminders that you are loved and valued and important.

Also tummy rubs were given in your honour. She sends screms.

A blessed day indeed, and in return I present to you a snoring Salem, provided the video attaches.

That's his chair, he was verry happy I got a new one for my birthday because now I'm not constantly moving him so I can sit.

#novas grimoire

[wolfxdayz]

Several kittens mew in chaos the soft kitty screms loud for a moment mean while one is face down snoring as a loaf. -kittenz

“Ok ok everyone chill.. oh wow you got some lungs little guy.. ah ok your gonna need names .. you who screamed in my ear .. little shit your name is screech, and uh.. “ he looked at the one face down asleep .

“.. that’s snooze .. the rest of ya.. are little hellspawns until I can think of a better name.. “

[lost-sunset-canine]

screaming loaf

#fox #red fox #fox loaf #screm #qwp #AAAAAAAAAA

[emeraldtawny]

It is i, the Screm-Anon. YES I FUCKING AGREE WITH YOUz, theo would totally do that but i think he secretly also is a soft doofus....wait...I’m pretty sure everyone in this fucking mansion is secretly a soft doofus(except vincent tho, he’s the doofus baron of soft-looking-babey) ANYWAY i love their pets so much!!! They are so DAmN AdOrabLe! I mean, LEO WITH KITTY, HE LOVES HIS KITTY SM, VINCENT WITH BRUSHHH BABY!! Lmao and then there’s stabby bitch Shakes, with a bunny-loaf-blob(the bun is cute)

Screm anon, perfect name 10/10

Welcome to my TedTalk. Topic: everyone in Ikémen Vampire is an idiot™️ on the idiot spectrum™️ and they should all be loved and protected.

AND YES, THE PETS. THE PETSSSSSS!!!

I love birbs so I automatically love Mozart’s owl Schelm and Dazai’s finch Bunta (precious pudgy poof babies, must scratch the feathery noggin). Another trash panda to love and snuggle uwu~ And, Loki aside, what’s this theme of the yanderes having bunnies?! I mean, I love it but also....why must the smol fluffy bunbun be the companion of a man who has 100% thought about keeping me in the depths of a dungeon to make me have a Lady Macbeth-level breakdown? 0-o

#tawny rambles #yes Shakespeare all of the perfumes in Arabia cannot sweeten your fucking personality #but you have Puck...and Puck is cute...... #how dare they all have adorable bundles of joy as pets

[swimming-to-djibouti]

nice cat things

-grabbing ur face to bring it closer to theirs n give kisses or.,..

-to rub their cheeks against urs

-also the gentle curious sneef

-alwAYs gotta streeettchhh out in a ray of sun

-0 to 100 sudden bursts of insane energy and Zest For Life

-homngery screm !! pls feed cat!!!!!

-following u around the house to see what ur doin

-folded paws to complete bread loaf transformation

-VERY loud purring

pls add on thank

#cats #mine #maia screams #ive been talking to this guy and he only likes kittens #so i gotta convince him cats are actually great haha

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

ok i need. need. NEED. you all to understand what high support needs autism actually is. not just higher support, but highhhh (high) support.

& honestly me, am not even fit to talk about this!! but knowing popular (often low support) autism content creators & authors tokenize me & include me in justification “well i listen to high support needs people and they need—”

high support needs not just need remind take meds, not even need remind eat, need remind shower. if you think “high support needs” & those struggles come first in mind & see those as most represent of HSN, most classical way of be HSN, then you wrong. you wronggg.

many HSN autistic, not even “advanced” enough (for not have better word) to able use reminders. on average day often need physical help. for a lot, need complete physical help. need complete physical help hold spoon n fork, or not able be a part at all and need other people do it. need be told open mouth chew swallow sometimes. need other people clean up drool & spill from mouth & mess.

they have worth. deserve all the fucking help they need.

“difference between low & high support is not actual amount struggle because all struggle inside same but that high support show more external outside struggle & those struggle more annoying for people around them” hear this so often and make blood boil because cannot be farther from truth yet some you all so loudly proclaim.

then tell me why only hear LSN say this. why only hear LSN on internet. why all big content creator big authors big autistic speakers all LSN.

tell me how someone nonverbal and no robust communication no functional language struggle even nonverbally communicate not even AAC not yet or not ever ever, how that same inside as someone who able speak who speak fluent who able communicate want needs dreams have conversation with words

both struggle. but not fucking same struggle.

many people in between. but you not get use people like them like me to give self shiny credential of “i know high support needs because i listen”

don’t use me. you embarrass me.

#not vague post of mutuals #angry not able write as clear but just want grab people and shake them #loaf screm #actually autistic #high support needs

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

autism can be an invisible disability.

but saying “autism is an invisible disability” is widely inaccurate & borderline aspie supremacist.

for many of us, our autism is highly visible and i don’t mean the “dress a little quirky a lil absent minded cover our ears when loud noises” just a lil weird kind of visible

#loaf screm #actually autistic #actuallyautistic #autism #autistic #high support needs

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

autism awareness & autism acceptance not either or. not mutually exclusive. can coexist. need coexist.

“there enough awareness for autism already 🙄 we need acceptance”

ok. you aware of high support needs autism? aware what that even means? not “need reminder take meds need remind take shower” “high” support needs autism, but “need full physical help do bADLs lack danger awareness may accidentally hurt self or even kill self without support” high support needs autism? not just higher support needs people who can be independently online do advocacy, but those who need help from others even be online, or those who cannot be online at. all.?

aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people? not just nonverbal nonspeaking people who can write grammatically correct cannot tell apart base on writing. not just nonverbal nonspeaking people who can be online who can advocate online.

aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people who cannot communicate in way that easily understood, either for now, or ever? aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people without functional communication, aware of how without functional communication, how that drastically limit communication, even though behaviors are valid communication? aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people who may never use AAC fluently even with best support?

aware of technically verbal but very limited verbal autistics who may only able say wants & needs but not other things and certainly not online advocacy, “despite being verbal”?

aware of just how much our life depends on caregiver/carer/PCA/etc? aware how vulnerable that make us? aware of abuse from caregivers? aware of caregiver burnout from lack of support for caregivers, & how that impact our care we receive? have you even heard of term respite care? aware of those of us who cannot separate ourselves from caregiver? aware of those of us who cannot participate in autism community without caregiver?

aware of visibly autistic people? aware how we not automatically believed? aware how we often bear blunt of violence because we most easily identified target because we visible? aware visible =/= get support, aware that many those diagnosed severe who now adult so no longer qualify for services under 21 year old, languish in hospitals because nowhere to go? aware how long life saving necessary waitlists are? aware that even to this day parents have to fight school fight day service fight government fight insurance for them give their nonverbal nonspeaking child AAC & be properly taught how use it? actually, are you aware of how properly teach AAC to nonverbal nonspeaking, developmentally delayed child who may or may not have intellectual disability?

actually, aware of autistics with (correctly diagnosed) intellectual disability & how they make up big amount of autistic? aware of institutional systemic & legal impact of mental [r word] right & the human rights abuse justified using r word right? wait, you aware that r word come from old term for intellectual disability, that, actually, still in many laws because no one bothered updating, right? aware of what severe profound ID look like? and aware they real and they still human deserve education deserve life deserve care, yes?

aware of early diagnosis 20 30 or even 10 years ago, not same as now, even less resources & knowledge about autism now? aware that while gender race class 1000% impacted diagnoses, a lot of early diagnosed people early diagnosed because… they die without support unlocked by diagnosis, right? but also, aware that in old times, early diagnosis often did mean doom, not because autism bad or anything, but because severe lack of support & diagnosis can literally bar you from so many things including basic education?

aware that for many people in special education, which impact specific group of autistic people, they not get degree when graduate high school, they just get certificate, which limit their educational & employment opportunities & others?

aware of life saving importance and necessity of masking for autistic of color especially Black autistic people, despite stress inducing traumatic? aware that live in broken system be victim of hate crime & police brutality just as traumatic often even more traumatic than masking? aware that many Black & other parents of color forced to teach their child masking because of this?

are you aware of most marginalized autistic people? aware of leadership of most impacted?

aware you can and need to care about autistic experiences & form of autism you not experience? aware that you can and need to do that without try twist your experience into our experience into our words our community?

aware that advocacy goes beyond about you?

aware that you can’t speak for all autistic? aware that you shouldn’t speak for all autistic?

are you aware of when you need to stop talking & listen & amplify others? aware of when and how to decenter self?

aware that even this long post, barely scratch surface? still so much to say?

[better worded version of original post]

#loaf screm #actually autistic #autism acceptence month #autism awareness #autism awareness month #high support needs #long post #nonverbal #nonspeaking #autism #autistic #autism acceptance

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

“it’s autism acceptance month and i’m sick and tired of allistics treating me as if ‘autism means stupid’ ‘autism means low IQ’”

it’s autism acceptance month and i’m sick and tired of autistics without intellectual disability separating themselves from autistics with intellectual disability and pretending everyone w autism have high IQ no thank you go burn go explode shut the fuck up you are a part of the problem you are not much better you are just as ableist and awful

#actually autistic #actuallyautistic #loaf screm

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

need self dx autistic people. who choose not get professional dx. to realize

the ability to choose yourself. to not get diagnosed. and avoid mistreatment that comes with having this label on permanent medical record. big advantage.

you have big advantage over those of us who. early diagnosed who had no say in it. or late diagnose who need diagnosis for support and accommodation and services. or forcibly diagnosed in psych ward etc.

for example. you less likely be denied visa and citizenship. when birth country go towards fascism, official autism diagnosis on permanent medical record not gonna be reason why you can't leave why you stuck there.

heard different news "this country considering say you have autism on driver license," you all not going be target for that.

if you ever in custody battle or want adoption, official autism diagnosis not going to hold you back. not going to be used against you. because you don't have.

even ability to weight pro & con. and ask "should i get diagnosed?" and make decision by yourself. many of us didn't have.

not saying you not have difficulty for be autistic, or not have difficulty without diagnosis. yes late diagnosis hard to get because money and time and good doctor. yes if people think you autistic and insult you for it they not care if you diagnose or not, they don't even care you autistic or not. you may even face things i said for other diagnosed disability. but specifically, i talk about autism.

but. need you all to recognize your choice your agency, many of us not privileged enough to have.

need you all realize in some autism issue, you all not most impacted.

#actually autistic #actuallyautistic #loaf screm

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

“autistic people don’t have hard time communicating we just have hard time being understood because other people suck listening”

i hate you

hate you for pretend me not exist hate you for rewrite autism so only you feel comfortable be moral high ground and so you not have share same space with me

#loaf screm #discourse #actually autistic

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

my frustration with “going nonverbal/nonspeaking” (as a fully nonverbal person)

transcript: my frustration with “going nonverbal/nonspeaking” (as a fully nonverbal person)

this written for instagram because of this post. but thought tumblr may like it too. “you” means general you, no one specific.

the instagram post and this on wordpress

this disclaimer is for instagram but also for anyone new to this discussion:

in full honestly, don’t know how to write this. am tired, language and complex ideas too much at time of writing, and general exhaust at having to argue same thing over and over again and justify own existence. tired of being minority within minority, wish there are others to do these work for me so i don’t have to do it all by self, singlehandedly advocate for everyone (not to mention problem with that—i can’t speak for everyone).

so honestly, if you don’t have anything nice to say, especially if you speaking (yes, even if you lose speech. include you), just don't say anything at all. move on.

online actually autistic community (AAut) dominated by white, lower support needs. level 1, speaking, late diagnosed, high masking autistics. find people like you is great, what not great is you treat your very narrow community as “voice of all autistic” and your experience as ultimate autistic experience. i write plenty about that, many more elaborate than this, if you not familiar with this concept.

many people in this community experience times when cannot speak, sometimes because overwhelm, shutdown, dissociate, or anxiety (situational mutism), but do not struggle with act of speaking rest of time (some struggle with speech all the time but still can speak - more on that later). the community call “going nonverbal/nonspeaking,” or even “when i am nonverbal nonspeaking” (not talking about those nonverbal as child and verbal now older), after clinical term “nonverbal” (nonverbal autism) and term coined by apraxic nonspeaking autistics “nonspeaking.”

both of which talk about it as an “all the time” experience.

when i search nonverbal or nonspeaking because i want community too, want see people like me too, two category i see: 1) parents of nonverbal nonspeaking children, whom can’t relate to because age, who can’t write own experience because their age and developmental ability. and 2) overwhelming amount of speaking autistic talk about going nonverbal going nonspeaking.

and the very very few fully nonverbal nonspeaking voices. drowned out. cannot find anyone.

nonverbal used to be term to describe us, people who can’t speak or cannot functionally speak beyond few words. medical term, alright, so some of us don’t like. so some of us reject that and create term all of our own, called nonspeaking. created by nonspeaking autistics with severe apraxia and brain body disconnect, describe their own experience of able to think in words able to spell out words (with great dedication and work and support), just cannot do that with mouth. their term. they create.

and you take it? without knowing context? without reading anything by those same nonspeaking coiners?

when is last time you purposely seek out nonverbal nonspeaking voices? when is last time you accidentally came across us? can you name any nonverbal nonspeaking advocate that talk about their experiences? one? two? three? a BIPOC person, a (specifically) Black person? a Black woman? a trans person? a physically disabled person? a person not from western world?

same narrative over and over. “i can speak for nonverbal autistic i understand their experience because i am autistic i can’t talk sometimes” no you cannot. as someone who was able to speak when young who lose speech (”go nonverbal”) but now have no speech to lose because full time nonverbal. no the experience not the same. not comparable. you gain it back. i don’t. you can explain with mouth words what happen when you get out. i can’t, i only have AAC. countless nonverbal nonspeaking people without AAC or sign cannot, at all. you never experience daily small and big struggle of casually being nonverbal all the time.

your experience of lose speech unique from my nonverbal. but if you so insist to compare and equate, you only guest to my experience, my daily life.

“when i go nonverbal and no one understand so have to force to speak” i cannot force words out. know you don’t mean to say this, and not saying you at fault for this, but nevertheless accidental perpetuate and reinforce idea that anyone who don’t speak can just be forced to speak if try hard enough. but often not how it works. and this exact harmful rhetoric devoid and delays nonverbal nonspeaking people given access to AAC, because “need try to force words out first, AAC unnatural so last resort.”

this may be new concept for you. new concept to instagram, to tiktok. to other places. it may seem i only one with this problem, “i once saw a nonspeaking person’s account and they don’t have problem.”

yeah, because we are not monolith. some nonverbal nonspeaking people don’t care. some nonverbal nonspeaking people may even welcome “go nonverbal nonspeaking” or “when i am nonverbal nonspeaking.”

but don’t be fooled into believe i only one. have many nonverbal/nonspeaking and/or higher support needs friends on tumblr, who talk about this who have been saying this for years. *years*. years before i joined. i am not creator, i only bring message here, because many of us are too high support needs too disabled to do anything else. many of us only stay on our small corner of tumblr because it most peaceful, because at least some listen, because least hostile, because need to defend our experience against our own community the least. (but it happens less doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen, we still exhausted.) many of us only stay on our small corner of tumblr because that all we can handle, or because we not allowed or shouldn’t be on other social media because age or abilities or both.

i cannot handle conflict i do not do well and i shouldn’t be here. but if not me, who else? if i don’t do it, who else is going to?

some nonverbal nonspeaking people and parents of them may question, why you start debate about useless term when so many nonverbal nonspeaking people don’t even have access to communicate, real problems. to that i say i do those work too. and to that i say this is real problem too, because am autistic so online actually autistic community should also be my space too but it not. but it hostile. because am lonely because seeing yourself so crucial because don’t know anyone in person like me don’t have any friends in person like me, so i go online to find people like me and i cannot because no own term to search and what used to be term many people without similar experience insist they understand and can speak for me because they say we have similar experience. because this aloneness and the unique difficulty from being full time nonverbal and the struggle of future and the unique mistreatment from both outside but also inside community have drove me over edge many times and it is presence and knowing their presence of my tumblr nonverbal nonspeaking / higher support needs friends that gave me hope to stay. because so many people don’t listen and instead speak over. terminology only a symptom of problem. address roots, sure, but part of address roots is address symptoms.

‘well nonverbal people are never around” maybe it because you don’t make it welcome for us to join.

“fully nonverbal rare anyway” estimated 30% of us nonverbal nonspeaking, which this statistic probably only count those nonverbal since birth. even more are minimally speaking or without full functional communication, abilities limited to requests. sure, 30% still not majority. but significant amount never the less. speaking lower support needs autistic without intellectual disability not majority anyway too but your experience still deserve heard. ours too.

“see less nonverbal people because they don't have ability to communicate and use social media” yes, many nonverbal nonspeaking people not given access to communication (like AAC), forced to live in silence (because body language communication not enough alone!). silence from birth to teenage years, to adulthood, even until they die. some cannot understand social media or AAC because intellectual disability or cognitive ability. some not allowed on there because safety, some not allowed on because presumed incompetent and abused. all true. do you advocate for them too? or is it just talking point against me, pretend you care?

but not all of us, we exist. some of us thankfully supportive parents all along, parents given resources, us given resources, so we access to AAC since beginning. some of us became nonverbal later in life (which not same experience as those early in life, i acknowledge). some of us after years of forced silence, finally given access to AAC and can now communicate and advocate! some of us on social media - do you listen?

but you see none of us in your community anyway. maybe one token person.

you can go nonverbal. i cannot go verbal. see difference? you can come close to my experience, but i never will have (future) ability to go to yours.

it frustrate that have to specify am nonverbal **all the time** when write this, because if don’t do that will be assumed otherwise. frustrate that when in neurodivergent space stranger see me AAC they assume i can speak because they only know part time users (know part time users frustrate too because people assume they cannot speak and get surprised when they do. me being assumed automatic part time is not fault of part time AAC users.)

even been told am privileged to be nonverbal nonspeaking, privilege over speaking autistic who lose speech because in their mind it mean i get all support i need i get all recognition get all the representation. which. couldn’t be farther from truth.

all that. is fraction of reason i frustrate at “going nonverbal nonspeaking” and “when i was nonverbal nonspeaking.”

so many other words. lose speech. intermittent speech.

just want have own sub community where can find people similar experience.

#actually autistic #actuallyautistic #autism #nonverbal #nonspeaking #actually nonverbal #actually nonspeaking #nd #asd #loaf screm #long post

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

truly do believe that higher support needs autistic have many in common with low support needs autistics. and how actually level 3 autistic many in common with level 1 autistics, and level 2 with both.

but with state of autism advocacy and casual aspie supremacy and lateral ableism & punch down ableism. have to keep emphasize how drastic different higher support needs & higher level autistic experience from low & level 1 autistic experience.

because if don’t keep emphasize difference. we get erased. our terms and words used to describe our experiences co-opted by people who don’t actually live them or don’t realize severity of what we describe what we mean, when us who actually experience these things get kicked off. spoken over. ignored. bullied. be target of ableism. which. actually yes, directly leads to decrease awareness of HSN & level 3 autism and have services pulled.

but this emphasis on difference between us… often lead to people, even allies to HrSN autistics, treat us as complete different, separate, incomprehensible beings—sometimes well intentionally because fear of speak over.

#loaf screm #high support needs

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

support need deserve met even if technically can survive without

and

if able not die without support, have advantage than people who would die without support

both true same time

#loaf screm #high support needs #medium support needs #low support needs