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#loki incorrect quotes
theaudacitytowrite · 2 days ago
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Loki: *grunts in pain and clutches his chest*
Y/N worried: Hey, whats wrong?
Loki: I think I had a cardiac arrythmia.
Y/N: *frantically searching for their phone to call 911*
Loki: I just took one look at you and my heart skipped a beat!
Y/N: *glares at Loki and hits his arm*
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darkacademicfrom2021 · 2 days ago
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Flufftober - Day 22
22 - Flirting at Work
Pairing: Loki x fem!reader
Word count: 900
Written for @flufftober2021 's event.
Tags: Honestly? Probably angst. Sorry.
TW: THIS IS NOT FLUFF. I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT FLUFF.
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Loki has had a difficult last half century.
He’s already had the big romance of his life —even young, as he technically was—yet being in love with a Midgardian had its cons, and he was now suffering the consequences.
He’s had the famous love they all talked about, yet he had the misfortune that his was ephemeral. You lived by his side as long as it was meant to, and now he was back to solitude again. Your absence weighed on him, yet he knew he'd find you again. You always had a way to come back, even when you were away forever.
He’s now drinking a glass of whiskey, all alone on a midgardian bar, hoping for you to walk in back again and say “hey, turns out the ones from the morgue were wrong, I’m alive hahaha”. He knows it won’t happen, but death seems to repel him, so what damage was in a little bit of hope?
“Another, please”, he asked the bartender without even looking her in the eyes.
“I’d ask if you want some ice on it, but you seem the kind that would be disgusted even by the question”, she laughed smoothly.
Loki pulled his gaze from the glass towards her, and furrowed his eyebrows. He’s too drunk now, he’s sure. Otherwise, this would seem like a mundane conversation.
“You’re right. No ice, please”, he limited to those few words, knowing the barista wouldn’t understand.
Maybe she would, he doesn’t want to risk it anyways.
That's what you told him in this same bar, a hundred years ago. Exactly a hundred. That’s what drove his feet to this sacred place to begin with. And he, now drunk as a skunk, knew why he shouldn’t have come here.
He’s seen you everywhere. Especially in the face and words of this barista, a woman that only wanted to do her job and get out as soon as her shift ended, he’s sure. She was just making a little bit of conversation, to pass the slow time of the laboral journey.
“Here. And lemonade, too. You seem unwell”, she pointed out, handing him half the measure of whiskey he asked for and the glass of lemonade she mentioned.
“There’s… no need to worry. I’m trying to drink my day away, I guess”, he smiled politely, and she nodded.
“Bad day at work, or romantic issues?”.
“It’s an anniversary. Romantic issues, I guess”, he explained vaguely. What was the damage in talking about it with her? She was more than used to sad stories from the clients, and surely he wouldn’t make her uncomfortable. She seemed open to listen. And, as if she read his mind, she said,
“I’m all ears. You seem like you need a shoulder to cry on, honestly”.
“Well, I might”, he chuckled. She was right. Thor wasn’t one to share sentiment, everyone that’s ever been connected between you two —friends and coworkers, mostly other Avengers— were dead as well, and he hadn’t made any other true friends ever since you were gone. But it’s been a couple of years, and he should just move on already. “I met my wife here, today but many years ago”.
“You seem too young to have married”, she pointed out.
“And widowed, too”.
“Oh. I’m really sorry”.
“I look young but I’m truly not. You’d be surprised”, he smirked. She chuckled.
“Have you been widowed long ago?”.
“It was easier before”, he commented. “To love, you know”.
“Really?”.
“Love is lost these days. Not that I’m looking for anyone else again. I don’t think it would be wise”.
“I don’t think love is lost. I don’t know how old you are, but I don’t think we’re too far apart”, she said, and Loki chuckled again. She had no idea. “But love is never lost. Love is all we have at the end. Even when hope is lost, love is always there in some form”.
Loki took a sip of his drink and his eyes watered. You’ve always said that. How could one person be so similar to you, when you’re gone? Was this bartender you in a reincarnation? In your next life? Was he supposed to be finding you again?
“Even in hate?”, he asked, knowing the answer. This was the proof.
“Especially in hate”, she said. He smiled. The tears formed heavier in his eyes and he tried to push them back. She leaned on the counter and talked softly, as if telling him a secret he should keep well for the rest of his life. “You see, hate usually is the symptom of not wanting to love something you already love. There’s so much love hidden in there, it’s ridiculous”.
It’s you. You embodied someone else, and there you were, talking about love in a job that didn’t suit you with a person you didn’t know, about things you probably figured out in a very short life.
“You seem wise for your age”.
“Come on, how old are you? Fourty?”.
“Thousand eighty four”.
“Well, close enough”.
She laughed, and he smiled too. Maybe he could allow himself to flirt again. Even if it was to remember you in some way, even if it was just for a while. Maybe he could, and maybe he would, but he couldn’t stop trying to make her laugh. He wanted to remember you, at least one more night, at least one more time.
(Taglist: @lucywrites02 , @louieboo87 @the-departed-potato , @jesuswasnotawhiteman , @idontknow296 , @beksib , @spythoschei , @geekwritersworld , @whatafuckingdumbass , @mysticunicorn7 @shadowolf993 , @joscelyn02 , @t00-pi , @selfship-mishaps , @sallymagnoliaposts , @deadgirl88 , @theonewiththenerds , @vicmc624 , @spiderlaufeyson @theaudacitytowrite @bi-andready-tocry @alorev @justasmisunderstoodasloki @i-beg-your-pardon-laufeyson @theetoastyghosty @lokiprompts
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rins-love-wins · 2 days ago
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Tony: Loki, are you going with us? I think, this would be a very difficult mission, all the Avengers are already here.
Loki: I washed my hair yesterday.
Tony: Hmm ... That's very important information, Snowflake. And it doesn't happen often ... But what about the mission? Explain why aren't you going?
Loki: I WASHED MY HAIR YESTERDAY.
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bixofmidgard · 4 months ago
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Mobius: I have made a useful asset to the TVA
Literally everyone else: you fucked up a perfectly good Loki is what you did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety.
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chaoticbi2005 · 3 months ago
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Sylvie: Let’s play a game. 
Hunter B-15: Okay??
Sylvie: I’m calling it “Loki or Jet Ski”. I’m gonna tell you something Mobius said recently, and you have to decide if he said it to Loki, or to a jet ski.
Hunter B-15: ...okay….
Sylvie: Quote one. “I love you more than life itself.”
Hunter B-15: …shit…
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marvwlserpentine · 25 days ago
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Loki: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-
Y/N: You sleep with the snake plushie I got you last month.
Loki: HE’S MY SECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS! Also he smells like you.
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yobekind · 25 days ago
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Loki: Aside from me, who’s the most attractive person you know?
Y/n: This isn’t a trick question right?
Like you’re not going to get weird about it?
Loki: No, of course not!
Y/n: Fine, it’s Mobius.
[later that day]
Mobius: Hey, Loki.
Loki: Oh, hello, homewrecker.
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zemosimp05 · 3 months ago
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Y/N: So this is the girl you’re talking about? *totally astonished seeing Sylvie*
Loki: Yes…Y/N…Sylvie…Sylvie…Y/N..
*Sylvie and Y/N starting at each other for few seconds*
Both simultaneously: You’re so beautiful…
*both of there eyes going wide realising that they said it out loud* *Loki immediately yanking back Y/N behind him*
Loki: *pointing his dagger to Sylvie* Absolutely Not…stay away from Y/N… they are mine.
Y/N: Loki…
Sylvie: *smirking* not for a long time…
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anguiserina · a month ago
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Y/N: Loki and I do not have pet names for each other.
Thor: What do bees make?
Y/N: Honey?
Thor:
Y/N:
Thor: Then what do you call a bad little dog?
Y/N: A little bitch?
Loki, from the other room, yelling: WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
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glacial-snowflakes · 2 months ago
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Loki: *practicing compliments in front of a mirror*
Loki: Y/n, you look ravishing today... No.
Loki: You look beautif- No, too dull. They deserve more than that.
Loki: You look stunning!
Loki: NO!
Y/n: *passing by* It's true, you do.
Loki: ...
Loki: *internally screaming*
Part 2
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wtfmarvel · 5 months ago
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Loki really just walked into one of the most powerful places that ever exist in time and space and called everyone a clown...gotta respect that mf
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