“Has anybody seen Tony and Loki?” Steve looks at anyone and nobody responds, just shrugs and frowns. He drags his hands down his face “what the hell is up with them”
Suddenly the elevator dings and out steps Loki and Tony, covered in glitter and giggling.
“Are you still drunk?” Loki laughs looking down at Stark who’s hanging off his shoulder.
“I think so” he straightens and stumbles when he sees the living room full “oh hey” he smiles at the Avengers and lets go of Loki so he can walk over to the bar “remind me to never go to Vegas with Loki again”.
“What did you two do?” Natasha’s eyes narrow at Tony as he starts to pour himself some whiskey
“You’re already drunk” Loki states, popping up beside him with a shimmer of green before he takes the drink from Stark and downs it himself.
“Seriously what did you g-” Bucky stops talking and his eyes go wide “-holy shit” and no one knows what he’s talking about meanwhile the two men at the bar ignore him.
“Don’t think because of last night you can tell me what to do” Tony raises his eyebrows at Loki and the man does the same as Tony takes the glass from him.
“What a great husband you are” Loki says sarcastically before he pecks him on the lips. Tony freezes, they didn’t plan the kiss.
“You guys got married” Steve yells as he stands, the rest watch the two in shock and Bucky never took his eyes off their rings “you even got him a rock” Steve says looking at the black diamond ring on Loki’s finger.
Loki smirks when Stark replies “I’m rich Rogers and we were drunk”
“That’s not an excuse to marry your enemy” Quill chimes in and Loki smirks harder
“Your enemy” Tony wiggles a finger at everyone “I was the one stuck with him for a year”
“You enjoyed all the pleasure I gave you, don’t lie” Loki lies and Tony almost spits out his drink, yeah he’s ever doing this shit again, especially with Loki.
“What the fuck” Sam looks between them his jaw dropped “you’re supposed to be with Pepper” he focuses on Tony and the man almost busts out laughing
“explains the split custody of Morgan” he raises his drink towards Sam with a lighthearted tone.
“Wait” Scott looks dumbfounded as he looks at Loki “is Morgan going to start calling you dad?” that broke them.
Tony knees gave out with how hard he was laughing and Loki tripped over him as he was trying to leave, so they all watched as Loki rolled on the floor holding his stomach and Tony was practically screaming
“We were fucking around” Tony gasps between breaths as he tries to get up but only stumbles and lands on his ass beside Loki, the god then slaps Tony’s arm as he laughs and Tony has to move away. “Ow you fuck” he says still laughing and holding his arm, he leans his head against the wall and tries to catch his breath.
“So you’re not married?” the relief in Visions voice makes Loki’s stomach clench.
“Nah we’re married” Tony huffs out, still out of breath “Loki’s very committed I guess”
“that was probably the best kiss you’ve had in your whole life” Loki lifts his head from the ground slightly to look at Tony
“it didn’t even last a second” Tony frowns at him despite the fact he actually liked the kiss.
“are you asking me to prove you wrong?” now Loki lifts himself so he’s leaning on his elbows
“okay that’s all I can take” Natasha blurts and walks away
Loki falls back to the ground as his body shakes with laughter
im so fucked