me watching one piece baron omatsuri and the secret island movie and seeing zosan:
they wanna fuck eo so bad
they want to be alone
they want to do it
sanji wants zoro back
(forget the real context of these scenes just their words are making me feral)
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410 words - busy - @jegulus-microfic
warnings: arguing, bipolar james (although it's not directly mentioned, i wanted to add this tag because that's kinda what I was aiming for, and if you want a little more info on this specific episode of his I will definitely make a second post about it because I also have gone through similar things (lol another author using their mental illness in a fic/oneshot), and I hope you enjoy<3)
James has been busy a lot lately. A lot.
James has always been a hard worker, Regulus knows that. It just feels... purposeful this time. Maybe he's overreacting, but James gets up, works, eats (in silence), and goes back to sleep. He hangs out with Sirius on the weekends. Cycle repeats itself.
Regulus is standing outside the door of James' office.
"Jamie?" Regulus' heart squeezes painfully with worry about what James' answer will be. Silence emits in the hall. Regulus knocks again. "Amour?"
The door swings open fast, knocking Regulus back a bit. "What?" James' tone is harsh, and bitter. Regulus' face contorts and his eyes water.
"Well, um," Everything he says seems more stupid. He picks the skin around his nails. He looks at the ground. "I was just..." He doesn't know what to say next.
"Well, spit it out." James bites back, and Regulus is almost dumbfounded.
"What do you want for dinner?" Regulus selects a question from his list:
•Are you okay?
•When will you come out of that room?
•Can we just talk?
•What do you want for dinner?
•What did I do wrong?
"I don't fucking know, Regulus, figure it out yourself." James spits his name like it's a slur.
He doesn't even know what he feels. Pain, anger?
"I can't take this shit," Regulus says, shaking his head as tears fall down his face and his bags get packed. He looks at James' face.
James. The man he loves is staring at him in the doorway of their bedroom while he is packing a bag. It almost feels like a fever dream. James is leaning against the frame of their door, one hand in the pocket of his work trousers, he looks almost nonchalant.
"Are you seriously just going to fucking watch me walk out?"
"If that's what you want." James leans his head on the frame now, just watching.
"You won't even fight?"
"No."
"You won't fight for me, James? For us?" James looks down at the ground, where the bag is, almost all the way packed before looking back into Regulus' teary eyes.
"No."
Regulus heart is being eaten by wild animals. He can feel them ripping away piece by piece, each one going slower, applying more pressure, biting further in.
"Did I do something?" This time, James doesn't answer at all. Instead, he looks away from Regulus, away from the suitcase, away from his bedroom and walks back into his office.
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Do you ever just think about the fact that Mike and Will have most definitely slept in the same bed many times (at sleepovers when they were younger) and so when they pine for each other and to be beside each other at night, it's not just some abstract thing in their minds but something they can basically tangibly feel and tangibly miss. Like they literally know the other's scent and what it's like to watch the other sleep and whether the other steals all the covers or kicks all of them off etc. etc. and they both have to sleep alone living with the knowledge that that's something they once had but will never be able to get back (at least to their knowledge) because of society's demands and expectations. 😇
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