Charles Bukowski, Pulp
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remember, loneliness is still time spent with the world.
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boygenius, souvenir / f. scott fitzgerald, the short stories / holly warburton, bobby at home / mimmo paladino, from james joyce’s ulysses / natalie wee, our bodies & other fine machines / mitski, nobody / andrew wyeth, christina’s world
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Some of you have never sobbed in the middle of your bedroom floor because you’re being forced to come to terms with your loneliness and are just gonna have to accept that no one will ever love you and it shows
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— Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes
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I hid my deepest feelings so well I forgot where I placed them.
Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre
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i wish i could go back in time and tell my younger self ''hey just kill yourself now. there's no hope and the future is worthless''.
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Why do I even bother trying anymore. Nothing i do is ever good enough
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This sweet lil sausage puppy is simping for you! He has a bit of an awkward stare, but he is just shy and wants to be ur friend. Be nice to him, ok? :3
🦭Support Me🦭: https://www.patreon.com/Eccobluu
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- the lonely city; olivia laing
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Franz Kafka, The Diaries of Franz Kafka
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John Koethe, “The Late Wisconsin Spring” | Kazuhiko Fukuoji | Jack’s Mannequin, “Dark Blue” | Antony Gormley, “Breathing Room” | Fairfield Porter, “A Painter Obsessed By Blue” | Daniel Danger, “we speak in ninth grade form, cord under the door. powers out, we wait out the storm and i am floored.” | Regina Spektor, “Blue Lips” | Federico Sciuca, “50/52 Last day on Earth” | King Krule, “Lonely Blue” | Anke Roder, “Starry Night”
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I feel so trapped, so alone, am I really that hard to love?
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What do I do to fill that void?? It's getting bigger with each passing day. I fear I'm going to be drowned in it.
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Often, at night, solitude loses its soft power and loneliness takes over. I am grateful for when solitude returns.
— Donald Hall
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Everything’s just been too much lately—I’m not sure how much more of this I can take.
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June 28th 2014, 4:18:00 pm
I am twenty-four and a half. I've lost friends to angry kids with knives at parties, some to oil-patch worker ennui tackled with hard drugs. I am haunted by all of them, them in fields of wildrose in my dreams (only sometimes nightmares). I just recently passed the age of the oldest friend I've lost, but I am still here, alive, an outlier now. They're here too, like they forget they're gone. How do I shut them out? Can I even? If not, how can I steel myself from their influence?
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I honestly don't think I can do this anymore.
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Getting close to people was and always will be the stupidest decision I often made..it’s terrifying..it’s exhausting. I can’t handle another “ almost”. I can’t handle seeing the same ending happen again. And again. And again..I’d rather be alone. I’d rather suffer alone. I’d rather die alone..I just can’t do it all. I’m too toxic to be around..I’m too bad for people and they’re better off without. I deserve to die the way I’ve always lived. Alone.
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After you left I had to relearn how to be alone
I had to learn how to fall asleep
Without the sound of your voice and the touch of a familiar hand
I had to learn to cook for myself and that it’s okay to eat even if you’re alone
I had to learn how to be by myself because I was never alone when I had you
I miss you
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