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#look i have no idea if this fandom is still alive but
piss-bread · 17 hours
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Yo Danny Fenton he was just 14...
He was 14. He definitely had an unusual relationship with his parents, but not too far out from a normal teen. He's embarrassed by them in public, but he truly loves his family. And they love him, in all his nerdiness and cowardice.
Then the accident happens. His parents (and Jazz) know that something happened, but only his friends know what he went through that day. Even after Jazz finds out, she isn't told exactly what occurred.
Tw under the cut for Death Mentions! It is Danny Phantom, after all.
It's a well-known fact that Danny Fenton is Schrodinger's boy. Both alive and dead. And the fandom sure does put our favorite paradoxical anime boy through some shit, but it's not talked about a whole lot the absolute horror of his death.
We see a recreation of what happened in Memory Blank (Season 2, Ep 1). We've been rewatching some of this show with our mother, and we had her watch this episode. I had told her beforehand that Sam basically went "the boy needs to die" as soon as she realized that Danny didn't have his powers. And surprisingly, after watching the episode, our mom agreed that Sam really should have thought of something else. But anyway, it really cements the fact that going into the portal was Sam's idea. Not Tucker's. Not even Danny's. Sam is absolutely the one who got him killed. Yet Danny doesn't harbor any resentment. In fact, it's shown in the same episode that Danny looks for reassurance from Sam (and Tucker) after getting his powers, quite literally asking if it's cool that he has powers.
Quote from me to my mother:
"Danny walks around a dark portal, and he accidentally turns it on from the inside. He gets electrocuted and basically watches himself die, not knowing what's going on except for that it's bad. He stumbles back out, knowing something is very wrong and passes out. His friends think he's dead, he literally phases through Sam's hands as she tries to pick his body up, and when he does wake up he's faced with the fact he's a ghost. he's been told that all ghosts are evil and dangerous, and now he is one. Yeah sure he must've figured out he could change back pretty quickly, but still."
And something else. Vlad has powers too, but he didn't die for them. He got a bad case of ghost acne and gained powers that way. I feel like if Vlad knew what Danny went through, he'd at the very least have a bit more respect for the boy.
Anyway, I love the characterization of Tucker and Sam. It's shown that Tucker is shallow on the outside, but he truly deeply cares for his friends. Sam is shown to put up walls around other people, to the point her friends know a completely different person than the outside world does. And damn, I wish we could see the two's reaction to the accident in the show. But we'll just go headcanon-ing for this one. In my opinion, Tucker would be the quietest he's ever been. He's shown to cower and close up when bad things happen (when he's actually aware of said things). I think Sam would be the one screaming. I think she'd be screaming and crying and just let her emotional state consume her until her friend wakes up.
That's it for now 👀 count on more text posts in the future tho
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lightlycareless · 22 hours
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Hii! I just wanted to let you know that I'm a big fan of your work!
I started of with discovering your "First it Hurts" fic on ao3, then being updated to your every post cus I look forward to every fic or hc's you make!
Also, I loved the valentines special post 💗💗 BUT IM SO CURIOUS ABOUT NAOYA'S LETTER AHH, anyways I just wanted to let yknow that I love your fics and the way you write Naoya! I hope you continue writing fics about him since there's a scarcity on Naoya fics HAHAHA, but I dont mean to pressure you! Please take your time, and I'm eagerly waiting for your new fics!
Hello!!
Awww thank you so so so much!! I'm so happy you're liking it so far!!!!! 🥺❤️ akajghajkghasgjas as well as my oneshot :>
Also, I'd like to apologize for the delay; I'm slowly working my way through requests, the main fic, and the weird schedule for my job 💀 I greatly appreciate your support and patience 🥺❤️ Also, I'll be writing Naoya fics for like, ever. I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO SEE HIM ANIMATED OMG ALL THE INSPIRATION.... gotta keep this small part of the fandom alive!!!!
Now... to the letter.... I feel like it would've gone something like this:
warnings: naoya is a prick, no surprise. but... he has feelings, just that he doesn't know what to do with them. this is the oneshot anon is referring to.
Happy reading!
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Y/N.
I didn’t think letters were still written in these times, outside of elderly people and the socially inept, but I suppose that for certain occasions they are still necessary.
By the time you get this you’ll probably already have an idea of where I’m going with it, yet I’ll still write it down.
I cannot deny that you came onto my life in the most unexpected way, not necessarily the best either.
I didn’t like your siblings, and I still don’t. I think of them to be nothing but highly annoying, arrogant, especially your sister who seems to parade herself around Gojo and the privilege she had of knowing him.
Your brother is somewhat… calmer in that aspect, he tends to keep to himself, and I respect that. Everyone should be like that, you know?
But I’m not here to talk about them, of course, I’m here to talk about you.
When I heard that you were going to enroll, I wasn’t thrilled, I genuinely thought great, another nuisance was to grace the school grounds—I already had this preconceived idea of you and was more than ready on keeping it… until I finally I saw you.
I’m sure you’ve heard this a thousand times already, someone like you must’ve undoubtedly… but you are the prettiest girl I have ever seen in my life. Your beauty is so mesmerizing, I couldn’t believe it was real—anyone thinking otherwise is either blind, stupid, or lying. Or maybe all at the same time.
I didn’t accept those feelings at first, tried my hardest to ignore them and go back to disliking you, find a reason to hate you and move on.
But I couldn’t, and when I heard your laughter, saw your smile, or the cute way your eyes twinkled whenever you were excited about something, I knew it was impossible for me to disregard it any further.
My feelings for you had only grown more and more as time passed, and now, I find it physically impossible to contain them, but still hard to express them to you in person.
So, I resorted to this letter, which I hope will be able to accurately convey what I feel for you, if only for a fraction, until then.
What I mean to say is… If you let me, Y/N, I can show you how special you are to me.
I can give you all that you want in the world—it doesn’t matter what, whether it being money, or the stars themselves—I will not spare any expense to give you what you deserve, and I shall assess that every day of my life until my death, starting with the gifts I’ve sent you today, alongside those waiting in your dorm.
I shall call you mine. No other man will be able to lay a hand on you, and I won’t allow any other woman to do the same to me either. My eyes will solely keep to you, and you alone; I expect you to do the same.
And in turn… I don’t ask much, except that you see me the same cheerful, adorable way you see others when happy, the one that has me completely enthralled, unable to keep it off my mind for more than one second, and… accept me into your heart.
If you so decide it appropriate to get to know each other better, you know where to find me. I shall await your response.
Naoya.
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As you can see, Naoya isn’t overtly romantic or good with words (I mean, the slander at the beginning lol) but he tries, as genuinely as possible—his honesty is a virtue to appreciate lol. Also, he was TREMBLING while writing this, if not crying hahaha he really almost died when he wrote you were the prettiest girl in the whole while world.
He’ll become more comfortable with it, of course, he’s a man that can’t hold himself when it comes to talking. But it’s nice to see him all shy for once 😊
Akgjakogja I’m so happy you all liked this little oneshot—I know it was quite the bomb to drop on valentine’s day, but I swear, it’s a happy ending story :>
If there’s more you want to know about that oneshot/au just let me know, I’ll be more than happy to indulge!!
Take care, and hope to see you soon!!!
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kateis-cakeis · 2 months
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rewatching bbc merlin really has me like buzzing in my mind with so many thoughts. Like I'm kinda watching it backwards atm going from S5 to S4, I think I will jump around 3, 2, and 1 but just,,,, there is so much especially in S5 that makes me !!!!!!!
Honestly, I feel like this fandom has to give the writers more credit. Like they did a damn good job, and to me, it's such a good tragedy. Especially how S5 plays out, it takes everything and just tears you down, and down, and down. It's perfect, perfect with flaws! But still perfect
#bbc merlin#merlin#yeah idk on that note about the writers - this fandom is way too harsh#like i know we all have ideas on how it should have gone#but i think we lose how it's still a story that they planned from the start to end like that#they did their job they set up from the beginning and it is good as a tragedy imo as someone who has studied tragedies#hot take but the characterisations are consistent - i mean like as consistent as they get for a 5 series show#they did better than most and i dont feel like any characters get like their previous characterisation assassinated#that includes Arthur and Morgana btw they clearly have arcs that work well and where Arthur's is a slower progression - Morgana's is like a#lit match - slow at first but when it gets going it's going and then gone - it's wonderful#i mean look at s5 it literally starts by talking about Arthur's bane aka his fatal flaw aka his hamartia#which is himself and i dont think it's as much as the overdone hubris but rather Arthur's love and trust for others - but that like in many#tragedies can be debated#okay something else that can be debated is the peripeteia - i think a good example of it is the Disir episode because that's when Arthur's#fate becomes sealed anything after that point is fruitless because the Triple Goddess has decided he must die because of his rejection of#the Old Religion - it's a reversal of fortune in a sense that Mordred is alive to play his part in Arthur's death - as Merlin puts it. You#could see it more as Merlin's peripeteia rather than Arthur's but still#if we wanna debate it more Arthur's peripeteia would probablyyyy be when Mordred stabs him because that's when his death becomes imminent#it's a reversal of fortune because he's dying from that point forward rather than a strong king he is a man dying#the anagnorisis is another point to make. You could say for Arthur his anagnorisis is all of the finale - like this constant realisation of#Merlin and his magic and realising all that he missed all that he didnt see and now it's too late because he's dying#I'd say Merlin's anagnorisis comes with the whole Mordred and Kara ordeal and how he realises his mistake and how it's gonna cause the#downfall of not just himself but Arthur too#then catharsis - see i think it's the only part where the tragedy falters because do we get catharsis from Arthur's death and Merlin's#immortality - where he's still at the lake centuries later?#i think in some ways yes and in other ways no because I don't think BBC Merlin is following an Aristotle's tragedy#i think catharsis comes more from Morgana's half of the tragedy - seeing her die - and i think further catharsis comes from knowing it's no#over forever that there will be a second chance for redemption for both Merlin and Arthur#but it is a more difficult one for sure#anyway point is that S5 specifically has a tragedy storyline that is very well done and we should credit that more tbh
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stellarspecter · 2 years
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@pscentral​ event 03: team colors
↳ half•alive music videos + orange
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anubisthe1 · 3 months
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I would have enjoyed " kamui blues " fully if it wasn't for whatever the fuck that guy called sasuke uchiha in that book was.
That is why my favourite book from the author is "the new recruit "
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orcelito · 11 months
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From what I can tell, ITNL is the only committed longfic time travel au for vashwood. Which is a Little strange to me, coming from p5 fandom where it feels like every other longfic is a NG+ au (not a bad thing, it's just very common)
And me sitting here like. Is there really... no one else doing one like this?
Makes me even more dedicated to what I'm doing lol
#speculation nation#itnl shit#not the only time travel au but most of them (from what i see at least) are time loops rather than true time travel#which the actual specifics of that are getting up to semantics i think. it is still time travel#but itnl is the only one that's got my specific explanation for it At The Very Least. which makes me feel a bit more confident#overall i just want to do something special. i want to do something New. & i want people to enjoy it.#discacc is a landmark for p5 soulmate aus and i want itnl to be a landmark for vw time travel aus#my specialty being finding a common trope that's not been done very much in a fandom (comparatively) & Committing To The Bit#41k feels so short to me still but it's among the longest trigun fics now. and it's only gonna keep growing.#shoot for the stars & all that business lol#full respect to ppl who just do one shots bc those r important too#but i have a fatal case of Look At This and Committing To The Bit that has me picking one idea and just shoving it in ppls faces#over and over and over again until ppl start to properly appreciate it. And So It Shall Go.#most of all i want to make something that will be Remembered. something that stands apart from the rest.#sentido is good enough with a relatively creative structure. but it's just smth that ppl read & think 'oh that was good' & then move on#i want itnl to worm into people's BRAINS. i want people to read it and feel flayed alive.#i want it to be something that people can never forget. and Such Is My Goal lol.#it's 10 am im still in bed and ive been here for almost 14 hours now. i have no business thinking this hard about this lmao#but the thoughts are there. i have a Goal. and im going to see it through.
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blog-of-reaction · 2 months
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If Charlie dies I am never going to forgive the writers. Like she is the best. I love her almost as much as I love Juliet O’Hara, and that’s saying something.
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azrielbrainrot · 2 months
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I Laugh Like Me Again... She Laughs Like You
Azriel x Reader
Description: Azriel would give anything to hold you one more time.
Warnings: Angst, Mourning, mention of suicide
Word Count: 3652
Notes: I don't even know where this came from. I was listening to sweet music by hozier and thought "what if I gave Azriel more trauma". The idea popped into my head and it basically wrote itself. I can't believe I have to say this but with this fandom I'm not risking it: this wasn't written to hate on Elain (or any other character) or incite anyone else to do so. Keep your stupid fights off my post, please and thank you. Hope you enjoy!
Part 2
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Another family dinner at the river house meant another night of watching everyone around him happy and in love. Azriel didn't think of himself as egotistical, would never think the love his brothers are experiencing is undeserved either, but it reminds him of a time where he was the only one in the Inner Circle with a partner, of when his brothers were the ones confessing to him how jealous they were of how he had found someone that loved him so much, of a time he never thought would have an end. It reminds him of you.
He looks himself in the mirror as he buttons up the navy shirt, trying to ignore the vacant room behind him. If you were here with him you would have been making jokes about his insistence on keeping the blue theme going in his clothes even though he swears he doesn't think too much about what to wear or his appearance in general.
On a good day, you'd be helping him with the small buttons right now, with shadows swirling around your legs and looking up at him the way you knew would take his breath away every time. On an even better day, he'd have your back pressed against his chest, his fingers inside your familiar heat, the other hand wrapped around your throat so you could watch him play with your body, panting his name and clawing at his arm, pleading with him to keep going, to let you touch him. He'd be late for an entirely different reason, not for getting held up talking to his spies, and then getting lost in his memories.
Sensing his thoughts, his meddling shadows move to his desk, filtering into the drawer they knew held a small velvet box. The dark wisps carefully picked it up and set it on top of the dark wood. Leaving it there and moving back to their original places around the darkened room, letting him decide for himself if he wanted to open it or not.
It had been a while since the last time he touched it, busy as he was these days. There were times he would sit and look at it every day, sometimes without even daring to open it and look inside. But there were also times where even the sight of the navy velvet would suddenly suffocate him with the reminder of your sweet scent, one he would never be able to smell again. It would make him hide the box at the back of his drawer, the back of his mind.
Over the last few years, his reactions to it had gotten milder, an unwilling acceptance of the fact that he would never see you again allowed him to reminisce on the happy memories you had together, even the sad ones, every little fight you had seemed so inconsequential now, he'd give anything to be able to have any moment with you back, to hear you say his name one more time.
He walks to the desk, only hesitating for a beat before grabbing and opening the box. His heart throbs as he stares at the ring sitting inside, thumbing at the empty space left behind by it on his finger instinctively. He had never liked rings, didn't like anything that brought attention to his hands or rubbed against the rough skin but the moment you slid the silver ring into his finger it felt right, he had never wanted to take it off. Azriel would wear a ring on each finger if it showed the world he was yours.
He wore the ring for an entire decade after you died, even after all hope that you could still be alive had left him, he couldn't bring himself to let go of it, to let go of you. His mother had been the one to tell him he needed to stop wearing it, that holding onto it, onto the past would only bring him more heartache. He could still hear her begging him with tears in her eyes, not bearing to see her son in such a state, but he had only actually taken it off when Rhys was taken by Amarantha.
He had thrown the ring into the Sidra that night. He's not sure if it had been anger, frustration or simply hopelessness that drove him to it in that moment. He was tired of not being able to protect anyone, tired of losing his people, the people he never thought he would even find when he was just a boy sitting in a dark humid cell. It must have been that boy's pain, still inside him, that drove him to act like that. If it hadn't been for his shadows immediately flying after it he would have lost it, wouldn't have this reminder of a happy time sitting in front of him right now, it had helped him ground himself more than once during the years following that night. His shadows had saved him from himself once again.
He closes the box gently, rubbing at the smooth texture of the velvet, trying not to let himself get lost in your memory and the bitterness that followed at the injustice of it all. Your marriage had only lasted a little over a decade, he's had to live with your ghost for much longer than that now. Still, he knows he won't forget that time no matter how many more years he lives, and, even if it's another five centuries, he knows he'll still wish he had had the chance to spend them all with you.
Some of the pain has dulled, most days at least, but the guilt still eats at him. He should have known something was going to happen, should have reached you sooner, should have told someone to go with you, should have gone himself, should have been the one to die in your place. The millions of possibilities will likely invade his brain until his last breath, after which he'll finally be able to see you again. That was another thought that had consumed him far too often in the beginning. If it wasn't for his mother, his brothers and Mor, if it weren't for the pain it would cause them, he would have taken Truth Teller to his neck just for the chance to see you one more time.
Azriel? His wings go rigid and he tightens his hold on the box at the sudden intrusion. He tries to push his thoughts as far back into his mind as he can before lowering his mental shields, almost letting out a sigh of relief at finding them in place, hoping his brother couldn't get a glimpse of his thoughts. He hands the box to his shadows so they can safely place it back inside his drawer. Are you still coming, brother?
Yes. He moves back to the mirror and finishes buttoning his shirt while trying to keep his tone as nonchalant as possible. However, the hesitation on the other side tells him Rhys sensed exactly what was holding him up in his room, he knows him better than anyone after all.
Hurry then. We're all waiting for you. Azriel closes his walls as soon as he feels his brother's absence in his mind. He knows they miss you too. They had welcomed you with open arms and considered you part of the family after their marriage. Everyone in the Inner Circle took a big hit when you went missing. He will never forget Cassian's face when he arrived to see Azriel kneeling down in a pool of your blood, with no body to be found. His brother wore his heart on his sleeve and it had shattered that night. There were countless sleepless nights for everyone following that moment.
They all threw themselves at finding you in any way they could. There was enough blood on the floor to tell them you had died but none of them wanted to believe it. Azriel talked to every single one of his spies multiple times, ordering them to track every movement in their respective areas. Rhys sent letters to every ally he had and then joined Cassian and Mor in searching every corner of Prythian personally. Even Amren, ever the logical emotionless one, searched for you with every means she could, contacting friends the spymaster didn't even know existed. But, one by one, they all had to accept the truth, Azriel ending up being the most hesitant to.
He had long since killed the attackers, putting them through as much pain as possible for as long as he could keep them alive, making them regret ever touching you. But that didn't help with the gaping hole in his chest, nothing helped. They didn't know how to find your body either. Rhys looked through every corner of their minds and only found them leaving you behind, bleeding on the cold ground.
Rhys refused to show him the memory, no matter how much he begged him to let him see you one more time. Now he knows his brother was just trying to protect him, not wanting that to be Azriel's last memory of you, with the amount of blood left behind he knew you couldn't have been in good shape, but at the time he lashed out at his brother like he had never done before, probably would have killed him in blind rage if it hadn't been for Cassian trying to hold him back and if Rhys wasn't Rhys. Thinking back he should have thanked him instead, for holding onto such a painful memory and keeping it to himself so no one else had to suffer from it.
Even if he couldn't see you again, he still wishes that he had your body to bury at least. Azriel doesn't know how the Mother could be so cruel as to not only let you die so soon, so painfully without at least letting him find your body so he could put you to rest next to your parents' graves. It would also give him a place to talk to you, to feel as close to you as possible.
The pain almost came back in full when Rhysand first told him about Feyre. Jealousy had reared its ugly head at the fondness in his brother's gaze, the slight tint to his cheeks at just saying her name. He was happy for Rhys, especially after everything he'd been through, but that happiness couldn't hold a candle to the pain he felt. He remembers the night he confided in his brothers about the lovely female he had met, how she had told him she loved him, it had been much like that one.
To make matters worse, the first thing he remembered when Rhys told him about his mate was a stupid bet the two of you had made - you had been adamant that Cassian, as sweet as he is, would be the next to get married, Azriel had voted for Rhys, one of his many conquests were bound to work out one day. He won and yet he didn't feel victorious at all. He couldn't even tell you of your loss, see how pouty you get when it happens, ever the sore loser. Didn't even remember the prize but there was no way for you to give it to him now either way. What hurt the most was that he couldn't even tell you his brother had found his mate. These were the best news in over a century and he just wanted to share them with you, wanted to share everything with you.
He takes another look at the mirror with a small sigh, straightening his wings and making sure his face doesn't give anything away before calling to his shadows. He feels them wrap around him slowly, giving him some comfort before taking him directly to the river house.
“Almost thought you weren't coming.” He was still half covered in shadows when he heard Cassian's voice. Everyone was standing around talking to each other, waiting on him. The guilt was tugging at his heart strings again. Why would he ever feel like he needed more than a family that loved him? Who was he to think this wasn't enough for him? It was something he could only dream of when he was younger.
“He's here now. That's all that matters,” the smile Feyre gave him was warmer than usual and her hand lingered on his shoulder for a second too long. Azriel looks over to Rhys, finding him already looking at him, studying his face. He had told his mate of whatever he sensed in his mind then. He hoped neither of them brought it up at least, now or later. What good would admit he misses his dead wife do? No one can bring you back to him.
“Finally. I'm starving.” Cassian clapped his shoulder as he passed by him on the way to the already set table, sitting down immediately. Everyone followed in his footsteps, greeting Azriel and finding their seats. Seems he really had kept them waiting.
Conversation picked back up naturally and he let himself fall into the usual rhythm of these dinners, letting his body relax around his family, forgetting about his old life for the moment. He walked over to the already set table and took his seat next to Elain, as it usually was these days. The seating arrangements had moved around a bit over the last years to accommodate not only the new additions to their little circle but also the relationships in them. He used to always sit next to Cassian but now had given the seat up to his beautiful mate. It left him next to Elain most times since they were the only single fae at the table.
Elain gave him a soft smile as he sat down and he nodded at her with a smile of his own. They had been getting closer ever since she was turned to fae and started living in Velaris. Her quiet nature quickly drew him to her, feeling at ease almost immediately with the middle Archeron sister. But he had to have been blind not to see the way she looked at him, not to notice the enamored smile she gave him.
Sometimes he let himself wonder if things could work between them. She had a mate but it was clearer with each passing day that she didn't feel anything for the male tied to her. It was also obvious how well Azriel and Elain got along, fitting into each other's lives almost seamlessly. He didn't love her but couldn't say seeing himself fall for the lovely female was such a far-fetched idea. She was a beautiful and kind fae, loving her would probably be as easy as breathing.
When everyone had been made aware of the mating bonds, he had even considered if the Mother had made a mistake. His two brothers had ended up with two of the sisters after all. Now he can see he was just desperate for a bond like theirs. In truth, he wouldn't even know what he would have done if Elain had truly been his mate. Would he finally put you behind him? Would he have thrown the ring away again, for good this time? He knows he couldn't bring himself to even with the power of a mating bond. You were etched deep into his skin just like the bargain marks inked into his shoulders.
As the dinner moved on and they made their way to the sofas in the sitting room, his family was already more than lively. Mor had busted out one of Rhysand's old wine bottles, setting the mood for the rest of the night. Azriel had completely relaxed by then, letting himself enjoy their company, his shadows retreating almost completely around the room. Finally having some reprieve from the particularly insistent thoughts that were plaguing his mind today.
Cassian was telling a story he had heard a thousand times now but he still laughed along with everyone else. Listening to Cass tell the story so many times wouldn't make the fact that he had flown straight into a river any less funny. Azriel even remembered the following part, the one Cass doesn't include in the story which was after they pulled him out and he had gotten sick for a week, making him miss practice and lose every spar with him and Rhys for the next months.
Even old stories had a new life with new people around, it was the first time the sisters heard this one, judging by the slight tint to Nesta's cheeks as she laughed at her mate and how hard Feyre was clutching at Rhys' arm to ground herself. Even Elain was laughing hard enough that her body was shaking. Her laugh was soft and melodic, a lovely sound really, but it suddenly opened a familiar pit in his stomach. It reminded him of you. She wasn't quite as loud and her eyes didn't immediately water like yours but the way she raised her hand to her face was similar. And just like that the illusion of happiness he had created shattered.
She was nothing like you but he still found you in every thing she did, in everything anyone did. He couldn't go to half of the city's bakeries and shops without thinking of you and every moment you spent there. He had even changed rooms in every one of Rhysand's houses, not bearing to sleep in the same bed you had held him in. Everyone in the Inner Circle had learned to avoid certain topics, certain stories in fear they would remind him of you. Even your name was rarely mentioned unless he did so first or strictly necessary. Every thought of getting over you was nothing more than wishful thinking. It was like his entire soul was begging him to go to you, but you weren't anywhere in this world.
This had to be one of the worst parts of his routine lately, having to take extra care to school his features when spending time with his brothers and their mates. If his face showed any sign of how much he missed you, how much he wished he could hug you to him just like they can do with them, they would immediately look at him with pain in their eyes, pain for what he lost and will never get back.
It had taken too long to get used to how differently they treated him after what happened. He had to start a fight to get them to stop treating him like he could break at any second when it was the truth. They knew it as well as he did, but they also knew that they had to let Azriel mourn in his own way, that there was nothing they could do besides stay by his side.
You weren't mates - maybe the pain he feels would never compare to what his brothers would go through if their mates ever met the same fate as you - but that had never mattered to him. His soul sang for you the same way he sang for his shadows, you were written into his very being just like they were. And, most importantly, there wasn't a single fiber in his body that wanted to live without you.
Even a mate could never erase you from his memory, even if you had been alive. He doubts if a mating bond had snapped between you two at the time, you would have gotten any deeper into him than you already were. He can't imagine loving you, wanting you more than he already did was possible.
He felt his shadows move to him, almost sending them away thinking they were coming to comfort him again, hiding him from the world as usual. Their urgency gave them away, and by the way Rhysand's body tensed across from him he also had noticed something amiss.
“What happened?” The High Lord's voice cut through the atmosphere immediately, everyone looked to him for an explanation and got ready for any possibility. His entire body stood still when his shadows told him they felt someone winnowing into the townhouse.
“Someone's in the townhouse,” he stood up as he spoke, sending some of his shadows out to find out as much as they could and the rest around Velaris to check if there were any other disturbances.
“Who could get past the wards?” He felt a shield around them, Rhys had likely set it up around his house. Cassian's siphons were flickering red as they all prepared for what could come next. Velaris was more than well protected, especially after the attacks before the war, but the High Lord's homes were nearly impossible to get into uninvited, Azriel himself had helped make sure of it.
“I don't know,” he held onto Truth Teller as he waited for his shadows or his High Lord and Lady to find something. His shadows were being strangely lax about the whole situation, maybe this was someone who knew of a way to go around his gift, keep them distracted.
It took longer than usual to receive a response from them, making him and everyone around him more concerned by the second. By now everyone was donning a sword or weapon of some sort, only waiting on more information before splitting up to keep Velaris safe and find the intruders.
When his shadows finally appeared they wasted no time rushing to his ear, at last sensing his urgency in the matter. Their answer was one nothing could have prepared him for, his heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest.
His shadows came back carrying a once familiar tune. They came back singing your name.
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lxkeee · 2 months
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MY HEART IS BROKEN SO I NEED TO CRY First of all, I LOVE how you write, and I wanted to make a request about Lucifer breaking reader's heart, it doesn't matter how, I just want a broken heart 😔note: Sorry for the English translator, I don't write it but I understand it, TOTALLY CRAZY
TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN
—Part One
Pairing: Lucifer Morningstar x Seraphim Angel! Fem! Reader
Fandom: Hazbin Hotel
Genre: angst (for now)
Warnings: none.
Notes: this one is short, 450 ish words but will serve as a foundation for the entire series lolol. Also, it's okayy:) your english is finee^^
PART TWO | NAVIGATION
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Life was good in heaven. Having been brought to existence by our creator, we were given a chance at life. The world is still currently in progress, slowly changing to adapt to newer life forms.
We angels were tasked to help this new world grow into such an amazing world. Speaking of worlds, I am very much grateful to be alive as I am given a chance to love. As one of the first few angels created, I was able to befriend Lucifer. God's most beautiful angel and whom I have the honor of calling mine.
Lucifer was such an awkward romantic lover, showing off his affections in his ways. Giving flowers, a pretty stone he managed to pass by while flying around, or perhaps by giving her kisses.
They've been married for some time now, being together for a few decades and recently got married. The wedding was amazing, friends and their creator attended the celebration. It was a very beautiful celebration, the wedding night was awkward yet romantic, two innocent angels experimenting, learning about the art of making love. It was wonderful. Despite being inexperienced, both had a great time being each other's firsts.
Life was truly good, until God announced that he made new creatures, mortals or humans as he calls them.
They looked like angels but without wings. They will be the very foundation of humankind.
Slowly and surely, Lucifer began to act weird. Ever since he visited the garden of Eden, he's been purposely avoiding [y/n]. Making up excuses to not spend time with her.
Rumors started to spread that Lucifer has begun to form ideas that threaten the order of heaven, [y/n] tries to stop him but Lucifer is stubborn. He believes that mankind needed this.
[Y/n] was heartbroken, why is the love of her life acting like this? Why doesn't he look at her with love and passion in his eyes like he usually does.
Why does it look like he doesn't love her anymore?
Deciding to spy on him, she followed him to the garden of Eden. There he saw her husband looking at the mortal woman, named Lilith with so much love and adoration in his eyes.
[Y/n] felt her heart and entire world shatter. Broken hearted, she quickly fled the garden. Returning back home and sobbed into her friend's slap.
She cried the whole night, Lucifer didn't even notice she wasn't home.
Not long after, Lucifer was cast out of heaven along with Lilith. [Y/n] was heartbroken beyond her understanding. She couldn't understand, her emotions all over the place. Her husband doomed humanity and was cast out of heaven with another woman.
[Y/n] didn't even get to tell him she was pregnant with his child.
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Happy Valentine's Day:)
Also, guess whose lap she was crying on? His name starts with A;)
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strawberri-acidd · 9 months
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I reappear in a cloud of smoke, with a sun and moon wizard cape adorning my shoulders.
Back again with news that I’ve come back to 2014. I actually had NO idea the fandom was still like alive (I would say thriving but it just seems low key rn) and I’m like ykw fuck it! I wanna have fun! I wanna redesign my old oc now that I’ve improved on my art! plus people seem to really enjoy my style and I just wanted to see what’d they look like in it.
AND I KNOW SHUT UP IM REWATCHING MARBLE HORNETS AS WE SPEAK. Shhhhhh it’s an amazing series and I still wanted to include them.
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dolliestfairy · 10 months
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Кᥱᥱ⍴ Y᥆ᥙ Ѕᥲ𝖿ᥱ ୨୧ ٬ ࣪ . ، ₊ ˖  ་ ݁٬ ࣪ ، ִ ۫
Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers fanfic with chubby!fem!reader ଘ(੭´ ꒫`)੭
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ཐིiཋྀ A/N : sorry for the break, i was run out of ideas and even if i had some ideas, idk which fandom should i choose so i really really conflicted about it.
ཐིiཋྀ Warning : Bullet Mark, Extreme Violence (not towards reader). reader almost getting gangr4ped (not by the slasher) kidnapping (i think..) stalking in jason part. Murdering, Massacre And yeah thats it. Reader skin color is not Announced
ʚဗီူɞ Jason Voorhees
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• first time he see you at the crystal lake with your so called companion. he see you wandering alone confused and scared only to find out later that your friend has left you alone in the crystal lake.
• he felt emphaty however. so he goes after your friend group and killed them.
• after he slaughter your friends he goes back to you. he sees you from direction where you can see him to make sure you didnt run.
• he approach very very slowly but since he's a quite heavy and big guy, his foot step is also heavy which makes you look around at the direction he's in.
• when you see him you.. stunned.. with a freezing expression only to be melt when you see jason covered his face with his big arms so you couldnt see his face and you wouldnt run away from him.
• you see blood covering him and his weapon he's carrying, so you assumed that this guy probably killed your friend which is true.
• but you also see a bullet mark on his neck and you insist him to go to the camp so you can heal him and he accept.
• after you healed his bullet mark on his neck, he ask you to hand a small book and a pen that was placed behind you. you take the book and the pen and you see he's writing something for you.
• he handed you a shattered paper with a writing that says "stay"
• you look at him after seeing the paper only to find a big dangerous male trying to not look at you. he must say that he's very thankful because his mask covered his pinkish cheeks.
• its only getting redder when he sees you nood at him. he swear on his mother thumb he would never leave you in danger like your shitty companion do.
ʚဗီူɞ Michael Myers
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• meeting you when he was still in the asylum. you were one of the nurse that were brave enough to take care of him.
• he would rather die than admitting this but he really love how soft you are. you look really fragile.
• he love but he also hate how you were so gentle with him. he love being showered with your gentle and affectionate touch but he also hate to thinks that the reason you were doing this because you thought he was weak.
• one day in the asylum, 3 men workers have a bad bad intention to you. you were trapped in a small room, it was almost midnight and its time for you to go home, but this bastard was trapped you inside and one of them start unlocking the door to get inside with you.
• you were trying to run, but those 3 men were strong as well more than you could handle. your mind start shattering when they were trying to strip you to get naked.
• you know whats about to happen. you were gonna get used by these motherfucker.
• behind them, you see Michael seeing you. you at that time was crying and michael only stood there. when one of them want to close the door and lock it, michaels hand quickly grab the mans neck and literally crush it with such an ease.
• one has down, two more left. you at that time were half naked and you see how burtal and horrifying Michael Myers can be. Michael pushed one of the mans head and threw it against the wall repeatedly until the mans face bloody. the one left trying to run but Michael quickly grabbed the mans leg and quickly throw him outside the window. you were at the 3nd floor you assumed that poor yet bastardize man was nowhere alive.
• michael look down at you and grab your waist and take you to somewhere else. somewhere far from the asylum.
• you woke up in a small room in some place you didnt know, you see Michael literally sitting beside you with his stoic expression. you were kind of terrifying seeing his expression but after you remembered what happened last night you were kind of relief.
• you grab his harsh hand softly and you look at him in the eyes and says "Thank you Michael." you see his darken eyes kind of lightened up a bit with some spark and you see his little tiny smile coming.
• you smiled at him and hug him soflty, when you two were hugging you felt your back was crushed and when you look back you see Michael big hands grabbing back at your back and you see his tensed muscles relaxing at your hugged.
• Michael, Silently promising to you that he will never let anything bad like that happen to you again. if someone dared enough to do it with you, Michael with no doubt will Disembowel them Alive. end of the story.
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title: no, you’re the monster
author: sciencebecameouraddiction
fandom: hazbin hotel
rating: G
genre: angst. like super angst.
pairing: alastor x reader
summary: As the hotel has gained notoriety in Heaven, after more souls are redeemed, an idea of allowing those at the hotel to talk to their Heavenly family is put in place. The only thing is Alastor has never even once, tried to use it to talk to his mom. What’s the worse that can happen when he does use it as you offer the idea up to him?
As the hotel gained notoriety and after a few more souls had been redeemed, Heaven started to finally collaborate with Charlie on redeeming sinners. One of these ways was for sinners to have a weekly call via a special portal to talk with their loved ones up in heaven. Which Angel and Alastor likened to prison. Charlie didn’t care though because it was “progress”.
The idea though, was to create a connection in heaven that sinners would want to work towards. Most of the hotel patrons and staff used their calls weekly. You remember Angel’s first call talking to Molly as he cried realizing she was up there and hearing her sobbing, thanking him for protecting her in life. Encouraging him to do better so that she could hug him. Needless to say, after that call Angel gave up just about everything and really set forward on a path to redemption.
The only person in the whole hotel who hadn’t used these portals were yourself and Alastor. Your whole family had been awful to you save for your sister and she was still alive. You had checked. Alastor on the other hand, you had heard him mention his mom. He talked about her fondly and made her special jumbalaya on occasion. You figured that he would use the portals to talk to her, but he never did. So, one night when sleep was evading you again, you found a chance to ask as you were sitting in the lounge reading and everyone had gone to bed.
“Another late night where sleep’s tender hold evades you my dear?” Alastor said, appearing on the couch across from you. You jump a bit and chuckle.
“You know me too well Al.” You say and put your book down. “How was your day?” You ask him, as he materializes a book to read. You remember the first time you asked him how his day was, he asked you why you wanted to know. You had to explain you were being nice and it was something friends did. He questioned you on your use of the term friends but let it slide.
“It was well enough. I took a trip over to Cannibal Town. Rosie says hello.” He chuckled. He had introduced you to Rosie after you wouldn’t stop begging him to come with to Cannibal Town. You wanted to see more of the Pride Ring but it was scary, up until traveling to the hotel, you stayed in your apartment mostly. Except for work down the street. So, why wouldn’t you want to go to Cannibal town when you had scary dog privileges with Alastor?
“Awww, really? I love that. I’ll have to come with you over there soon, if you don’t mind of course.” You say, dog earring your book page so you don’t loose it. Alastor scoffs seeing you do that.
“Why you choose to ruin books is beyond me.” He mutters. “And of course you may, Rosie may have my head if I didn’t say yes.” You nod.
“How else am I supposed to save my place Alastor?” You ask him.
“With a bookmark.” He explains, conjuring one up and it floats over to you, his magic opens your book, smooths out the dog ear and then places the book mark near the spine. You roll your eyes.
“With how you treat books I am sure you are devastated to know that the library of Alexandria was burned to the ground.” You say, your voice monotone, closing the book.
“Absolutely devastated.” Alastor grins and then goes to reading his book. You sigh, and ready yourself to ask him the question you’ve been wanting to for a while.
“Hey Al?” You ask quietly.
“Hmm?” He murmurs not looking up from his book.
“Can I ask you a question, and you promise not to get mad at me?” You say. He looks up at you, his eyes scrutinizing you as he motions for you to continue.
“So, today was portal day for everyone. And I’ve seen everyone use the portal to talk to loved ones in Heaven, but I’ve never seen you use it. And the way you talk about your mom… Don’t you want to talk to her?” You ask, looking up and your eyes widening as a darkness falls on his face. “I’m sorry, I was just curious. I can leave you alone as I think I’ve overstepped.” You say starting to get up.
“Sit.” Alastor says, a tentacle appearing and pushing you back down. “You’re… fine. I just don’t think my darling mother wants to see her darling son… like this.” He says motioning to himself.
“But if she loved you and you her-“ You start, being cut off by Alastor.
“She was the only one to love me in life.” He whispered.
“Exactly.” You say and gently cross over to his couch sitting next to him. “Wouldn’t you think she’d want to see you again, regardless?” You say earnestly.
“Well, I suppose…” Alastor starts.
“And would it not help you to have a conversation with her?” You go on.
“I’m not being redeemed dear.” He chuckled and rolled his eyes.
“No, I know your sentiments on that. But wouldn’t it be good to talk to her. Not to encourage redemption, but just to catch up?” You say. “If it were my sister, I would love that. I know when she dies I’ll be doing that, I don’t plan on being redeemed, because I want to stay here and help with the hotel. But I’d still want to hear her voice again.” Alastor sighs and looks off, you can see his jaw tighten.
“I apologize if I’ve prodded too much. I can go if you’d like.” Wanting to remind him you could give him space but a small part of you realizing this was good progress as he hadn’t freaked out on you yet. You celebrated the small victory.
“Maybe I will put my name down for next week my dear.” Alastor acquiesced.
“If you wanted to do it now while everyone is sleeping you can.” You smile and hold up the portal key. “The portals stay open until midnight. They started doing that because Charlie and Emily talk a lot.”
Alastor looked at you, his eyes wide. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I can even leave the room if you’d like me to. Or we can wait it’s up to you.” Alastor breathes and it’s like watching a war be fought on someone’s face with the emotions running through his eyes.
“Would you stay with me?” He asks, sitting up and fixing his suit jacket and ears, taking a breath.
“Always.” You whisper and his eyes widen. He nods at you.
“You sure about this?” You ask one more time. “You can say no and I’ll forget we ever had this conversation.”
“No, go ahead.” Alastor breathes. You stand up and look forward. You place the key in the air turning it and hearing a click. As the portal opens, a directory is pulled up.
“What was your mom’s name?” You ask, waiting.
“E-Evangeline. Altruist.” Alastor says almost breathless. You find her and look back at Alastor.
“One more time, I’m making sure, you want to do this?” You ask holding your hand to him. He takes it and stands up.
“I wouldn’t have accepted if I wasn’t sure.” Alastor says shortly. Giving off his confident air but his eyes were unsure.
“Okay. I can pull the plug at anytime too. Just let me know.” You press the name and the screen brightens and then Evangeline comes into view. Alastor gasps, his eyes wide and his hand squeezes yours.
“Evangeline Altruist?” You ask as she looks down at you. The portal must have appeared on a table.
“Yes, who is this?” she asks confused. You explain what your name is and that this portal allows those in Hell to communicate with loved ones in heaven. You explain that there is someone who would like to talk to her and does she accept the call. She does and you step out of the way and motion for Alastor to step in frame. He breathes and slowly does so, seeing his mother for the first time in who knows how long. There’s a gasp from his mother as she murmurs out his name.
“Hi Mama.” He whispers. The radio effect gone and a southern sounding accent in his voice as he talks to her.
“Alastor, is that you? You’re in hell? Truly?” His mother cries.
“I-Yes I am. I do miss you dearly.” He says, looking almost ashamed, his ears pin back on his head.
“I had heard the rumors… But I never thought my boy… What have you done Alastor?” She asks, her face twisting. “I don’t even recognize you from the man you were. The man I knew.”
“Mama, please, I-“ Alastor starts his eyes desperate, as he flits over to you and back to his mom. Your own heart shattering. You hold out your hand and he grabs it like a life line.
“No. You are no son of mine. I do not recognize you.” Her voice turns cold, your eyes widen and Alastor’s eye brim with unshed tears. “After everything… this is what you become? A monster?” The disgust in her voice is unbearable as Alastor bows his head and tears fall silently down his cheeks. You on the other hand see red.
“Now, just a damn minute here.” You say stepping back into view and shielding Alastor, still holding his hand.
“This is none of your business, girl.” Alastor’s mother exclaims, anger in her eyes.
“It became my business when you decided to unleash your bullshit on your son with me here. This was my idea, having him come talk to you, because out of everyone here at the hotel, he hadn’t made any contact with the woman who he holds in such high regard. So i figured, you held him in the same regard.” You start and get cut off.
“I loved my son, in life and in death but what he has become is worst than Lucifer himself.” Evangeline continued on. You felt your hand shaking with the strength of Alastor’s quiet sobs.
“No. Nope. That’s where you are wrong. Alastor has worked at this hotel night and day to help people be redeemed. He protects this hotel from those that wish it harm, he protects the patrons and Lucifer’s daughter Charlie. He is genuine, and while he has made a numerous amount of wild missteps in life and in death, he is trying to be better. I see it, the staff at the hotel sees it, his friends see it. And if you choose not to know him or you care not to get to know him, that is entirely your loss. He is not the monster, you are.” You say as you pull out the key, and start to end the portal. “Don’t call for him either. If he decides he wants to actually talk to you again, it will be his choice.” You say as the portal closes and the last words you can hear are ‘I’m sorry.’
“A little too fucking late for that.” You murmur pocketing the key. You turn and your heart breaks seeing Alastor’s tears paired with a smile.
“You don’t have to smile with me you know that right? Nothing I know about you would I ever use as a weapon against you.” You say as you cross over to him slowly, looking for any signs that he didn’t want comfort. Even though you felt like the last person who should be allowed to do so as this was your idea. You reach up and caress his cheek, wiping away tears that continued to spill.
“Alastor, I am so so sorry.” You say, tears coming to your own eyes. “I should have never suggested… I am so sorry.” You say again, bringing him down as he willingly folds into your arms.
“Can you take us to your room?” You ask, knowing he would never let any show of real emotion happen out here. He nods and suddenly you’re in the middle of his bed that has been moved into the forest he added in his room. You gather him to you and he sobs, his head in the crook of your shoulder and neck, as he grips onto you for dear life. There’s something even more heart wrenching as all walls fall and you can hear his natural accent, no radio effect at all, through broken words of ‘I’m sorry’, ‘She hates me’ and ‘I’m a monster’. His shadows darkening the space and the one shadow that always followed him looking so distressed.
“Alastor, if she can’t see the good in you then that is her own blindness. Darling, I can see it. Charlie sees it. You have changed from when you first got here. Hurt people, hurt people. And I think you’ve been hurt for a long while. It’ll take time, but I ain’t going anywhere. You’re not a monster to me.” You assure him as his sobs somehow become even worse hearing you. You gently rock him back and forth, and look up at the sky he produced for the forest. A perfect replica of the night sky on Earth.
“When I was back on earth in my 20’s, my sister would get upset and would go out to the roof. Anytime I found her there, I’d hold her and tell her stories of the stars. Do you want me to do that?” You ask. Wanting to take Alastor’s mind off of everything. You feel him nod and you smile slightly, pressing a kiss to his head, feeling him stiffen at the affection and hug him tighter.
“So there’s this group of stars that makes up a virgin maiden that they named Virgo. Many people say that Virgo’s constellation represents Persephone, the daughter of the Greek Goddess Demeter. Persephone in some stories was kidnapped by Hades, Lord of the Underworld. Demeter’s grief at loosing her daughter, abandoned her post as Earth Goddess, which caused crops to wither and the earth to grow cold.” You recounted one of your sisters favorite tales. Feeling Alastor’s cries fade and his body relax. “Because of this Zeus ordered Persephone to be put back on Earth, but along her travels she mustn’t eat anything.” You continue, gently wiping the tears off Alastor’s face with your oversized shirt. He doesn’t protest and just looks up at you, his eyes rimmed red but the self hatred you saw before not as prominent. You smile at him while you finish. “That’s why Hades gave her six pomegranate seeds, which she ate. Meaning that she would spend six months of the year with Hades and six months with her mother.” You feel Alastor sigh, and you think this is when he will get up and pretend none of this happened, fortifying those walls again. That doesn’t happen. He draws you closer to him, his body laid over yours and his head resting on the left side of your chest where your heart was.
“Tell me another.” He requests, not looking up at you but looking out into the forest. You smile and glide your fingers through his hair, stopping to pet his ears every now and again as you begin telling the story of the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper, astronomy stories being whispered well into the night until you both were fast asleep with a blanket Alastor had pulled up over you both.
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convolutedblasphemy · 2 months
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Ace in the Hole
notes: originally didn't plan to write abt hazbin or interact with the fandom because i've... heard tales... but for a show with a canonically aroace character my fellow asexual brethren deserve more content that caters to them. don't let this flop please.
synopsis: playing cards with the radio demon, you decide to make a harmless ace joke after rosie informed you that alastor is aroace. you soon have to realize that he has no idea what you're talking about and now he wants an explanation.
contains: alastor x reader (platonic or queerplatonic), gn!reader, aspec reader (left as vague as possible), shenanigans
warnings: alastor's eating habits, i left it vague where exactly on the ace / aro spectrum reader is but they do make jokes about allonormative society in the story so be warned.
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"Come in", you heard Alastor's voice from behind the door, along with the familiar radio static you could perceive whenever you walked past his room. However, you had never actually been inside. But following the offer, you pushed the door open and stepped into the radio demon's quarters.
The sight that greeted you was something that was half bedroom, half forest. It was as though someone had ripped the hotel room in half and put it into the woods. Alastor was sitting at a small table on the grass, in front of him a plate with a raw deer head on it. His metal fork was buried in the creature.
"Ah, it's you", he exclaimed with a tone that sounded overjoyed, "how can i be of assistance on this fine day? Excuse the mess, my dear, I'm just enjoying a nice brunch."
You hesitated for a moment, caught off guard by the lifeless deer head and the questionable things that Alastor considered "brunch". You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow, glancing back and forth between the radio demon and the dead animal. Pressing your lips together to a thin line, you shook your head. "You know what... I'm not even going to question this anymore", you let out a sigh, "deer cannibalism... why the fuck not, I guess?"
The last part you mumbled to yourself but Alastor's ears perked up when he heard the statement. "Oh, would you like some?", he offered, holding the plate up, "I still have the eyes left. They're the tastiest part."
You cringed upon hearing those words, trying to limit the amount of disgust that showed on your face. "No thank you, Alastor...", you rejected his offer awkwardly, "I would like for my stomach to remain intact."
"Your loss. More for me!", he shrugged with a satisfied smile on his face and plopped one of the eyes into his mouth. A quiet ew escaped your mouth and Alastor looked up to you again. "Did you say anything, my dear?", he turned the fork in his hand, inspecting it, though you were unsure what he was hoping to find.
"I was just wondering when you'd be finished with our poor furry friend over here", you explained and Alastor, who had noticed how you felt about the beheaded deer on his plate, was kind enough to cover the rest with aluminum foil and put it in the fridge. Damn right, you better not put this thing in the community fridge downstairs, you thought to yourself.
"Oh, what's the rush?", he wondered and looked at you with a curious glint in his eyes. "I was just wondering if- god, you're so questionable", you interrupted your inquiry when you caught a glimpse at the inside of Alastor's fridge, containing many such "meals" as you had just seen, "I was wondering if you'd like to play a game with me. Board games, card games... you can pick. Just nothing where I have to sell my soul."
Alastor let out a laugh. "Ah, you know me too well", he put a hand on your back and led you over to a bench in the corner and a table, "well, I'd be delighted to. So long as it's not Monopoly, that game is a crime against humanity."
"How so?", you asked raising an eyebrow. "It has led to countless divorces and at least one case of someone being burnt alive", he explained. "I'm just going to assume you had nothing to do with the latter?", you chuckled and Alastor gave you a proud smile.
"I can assure you, it was one hell of a barbecue!"
"I trust nothing that you would label a barbecue", you sighed.
"And why is that?", he asked and you gestured towards the empty table where he had just devoured the deer head, "ah, good point. So, what game would you suggest we play? Will anyone else be joining us?"
You shook your head. "No, it's just us. Angel is making the others downstairs watch his 'best performances of the last decade' and I did NOT need to see that. Also one of Pentious' Egg Bois apparently has the measles- no fucking clue how that works- but I didn't want to risk it", you let out sigh, "and then I was bored so I'm glad that you have time to indulge me."
"Always a pleasure, dearest", he hummed, manifesting a deck of cards out of seemingly nowhere, "so what you're saying is that I am your last and only choice of entertainment?" He smirked at you from across the table.
"Well, considering that the other options are worse, I'd say you're my first choice of entertainment", you reasoned with a smile. "Flattery will get you nowhere, darling", he chuckled.
"Why is it so hard to be nice to you?", you rolled your eyes, which only made Alastor laugh again. "Would you like some coffee or tea?", he asked, summoning a cup of black coffee for himself. You nodded. "Tea would be nice." Alastor snapped his fingers once and you could now find a small porcelain cup in front of you with some tea.
"Just so we're on the same page here, this is normal tea, right?", you inquired. "What do you consider 'normal' tea?", he looked at you with an amused smile. "Well, tea that is made from herbs, has no meat in it and won't give me Prion's disease", you elaborated, resulting in Alastor snickering and holding his hand in front of his mouth. "It's just hibiscus tea", he assured you. You were satisfied enough with that answer and took a sip, realizing that it was indeed just regular tea. It had a nice taste and made you wonder why Alastor would dislike it.
"You seem to enjoy it", he remarked, watching you from across the table. You nodded. "It's nice. Thank you", you smiled at him and then shot him a challenging glare, "who knows, if you keep doing nice gestures like this for others, maybe you'll go to heaven after all."
"HA! Heaven?", he let out a laugh and leaned back into his seat, "I have a better chance at becoming the next queen of England!" You found the mental image of that amusing. "Who knows?", you shrugged, "the afterlife is long and if Charlie eventually intends to be able to redeem everyone, you're going to be the leader of the angels before there's any chance of progress on Mothman's ugly nephew."
Alastor gave you an amused chuckle upon hearing what nickname you had just used to refer to Valentino.
"If that happens, heaven's lost all sense of self-preservation", you could hear static over his laugh and his image seemed distorted for a moment, his pupils replaced by radio dials. He returned back to his usual form just mere seconds after.
"As for the game", you suggested, "how about we play Rummy? Haven't played that in a while."
Alastor nodded. "That should provide plenty of entertainment for me", he began handing out the cards, "especially when you lose and sink into the miserable pit of despair." The last part had his voice distorted by the radio static.
Alastor handed out the cards and you began playing. Unfortunately for you, he already had plenty of melds on the table when your hand was still full of cards. You watched him curiously as he was focusing on his hand, planning his next move. You noticed how the ears on his head twitched a little, one of them flicking back as if something had irritated it. That's so adorable, you thought to yourself, suppressing a smile.
"Don't think I don't notice you staring", he chuckled without looking up from his cards. You denied it. "Are you going senile or having hallucinations?", you teased and Alastor played three aces on the table.
The Radio Demon was ready to tease you in return when you interrupted him. "Oh look! It's us!", you pointed at the three aces. Alastor looked a little confused but ran with it. "And who's the third ace?", he asked.
"Well, technically I don't know any other aces in hell so far...", you put a finger to your chin, "I was making a joke. It was a little flawed but I thought it was funny." "So we're two aces?", he asked for clarification.
You nodded.
"So you view us as the most valuable cards in the deck?", he further questioned. Rosie had told you that Alastor was what people would nowadays classify as aroace. What she didn't mention with any word, however, was whether or not Alastor was aware of that and as you now had to realize, he had no idea, which put you in an awkward position. "Oh god, you don't fucking know...", you mumbled and Alastor's ears perked up.
"Know what? Which part of the joke am I not getting?", he wondered, tilting his head to the side as the static got louder and his tone seemed more threatening, "I hope you aren't trying to mock me."
"Not at all", you raised your hands defensively and sighed, "I just forgot you're from a different time period and unfamilar with the terms. Rosie told me you're aroace."
"A what now?", he blinked in confusion.
You sighed, whispering to yourself. "I should have a PowerPoint ready for scenarios like this- never mind!", you found your enthusiasm again and began explaining the terms to him.
Alastor nodded slowly when you were finished, as though he was having an epiphany. "So you're saying I'm not experiencing sexual and romantic attraction because I am aroace and not because I am unhinged and clinically insane?", he asked with a wide smile on his face.
"The clinical insanity is in fact its own separate thing", you confirmed. "Good to know", Alastor seemed delighted, "back in the day it might have been considered a mental illness, so I never brought the topic up with my psychiatrist, after all I wouldn't be able to do my radio show from the psych ward, right?"
"Priorities...", you remarked dryly, "wait- you had a psychiatrist? And you still ended up like this?"
Alastor shrugged. "I was there for my irrational fear of bees, not because of the homicides."
You raised an eyebrow: "And you really didn't think mentioning the homicides was necessary?"
"Of course not!", Alastor exclaimed gleefully, "they didn't cause me any distress."
"Right...", you gave him a slightly concerned gaze, "did it at least help with the phobia?"
"It did. I am no longer scared of bees."
"That's great."
"I eat them now."
You buried your head in your hands. "Well that's just wonderful, Al..."
"So asexuality... it's pretty rare from what I understand? During my lifetime I've never met anyone else who felt this way, at least not that I knew of", he explained and you smiled at him. "Estimated to be about 1% of the population", you answered. Alastor smirked at you. "Why do you seem so excited?", he asked.
"Solidarity!", you exclaimed and held your hand up so he could give you a high-five. The fact evaded you, that Alastor also didn't know what a high-five was, so he just ended up linking his fingers with yours and holding your hand. "So what now?", he asked, staring at your hands with a confused smile.
"You're a little confused but you've got the spirit", you brought out with a wheeze, trying to hold back from laughing. Alastor chose not to dwell on the gesture any longer.
"Well, I suppose you're right, it does feel nice to have somebody who is also immune to the flesh vessels of the feeble mortals", he admitted, and you raised an eyebrow in surprise at his description. "That's one way to put it..."
After losing the game of Rummy to Alastor and answering a variety of other questions he had such as "Why are there flags and what do the colors mean?" and "Does it still count if the garlic bread and cake has raw venison on it?", you decided it was time to join the others downstairs again, as Charlie had another exercise planned for today. "I must say, you're a delight to be around", Alastor remarked, wrapping an arm around your shoulder like he would with an old friend, "do feel free to stop by any time, my dear."
You thought it was a pity he didn't intend to join you downstairs, but you felt as though the two of you had gotten a little closer by finding something you had in common. And Alastor refused to show it on his face, but you had a feeling, that there was a little relief and peace inside him, knowing that there wasn't a big part of the human experience he was told he was missing out on after all.
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Reblogs and comments are appreciated! If this gets enough notes I'll write Alastor QPR headcanons.
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rhystial · 6 months
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In the middle of the night, suddenly someone knocks hard on the door to the characters’ room. They get tired of opening it (no one sleeps anyway lol) and see there... a human..? A frightened, beaten and tired human. But alive. Not a strange shape, a real person. This human suddenly bursts into the room and closes the door. And when they start questioning the unnamed guests, the characters realize it's their s/o
As it turned out, the reader could not stand it and abstracted, and instead of turning into a monster, after a persistent attack they turned into their human form. As soon as Caine found out about this, for some reason he was very doubtful and is now looking for a reader to quickly destroy them. That’s why they came to theirs room. To hide.
(jax, kinger, pomni and ragata) I would like a romantic one
TADC & Reader who abstracted into a human.
fandom: the amazing digital circus
relationships: gangle, jax, kinger, pomni, ragatha, zooble (romantic)
warnings: uh nothing, i don't think?
notes: what a cool idea!! i decided to add zooble and gangle here, hope you don't mind! but i might edit zooble's part, i don't like how it turned out... also these headcanons imply to already be in an established relationship.
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Gangle.
Gangle felt (what would be) her heart quicken in pace when she heard someone knocking at the door late at night, fearing that Jax might have shown up to cause trouble.
She tried to stay still and keep her eyes closed, hoping that the persistent knocking would stop. But when it showed no signs of abating, she finally broke and reluctantly opened the door. To her surprise, it was you on the other side — a stranger, she thought.
With no time for her to voice her concerns, you hurriedly steered her back into her room, accidentally knocking her mask off in the process.
"Gangle, it's me," you said in a low tone, your grip on her shoulders firm. Her hands flew up to her mouth and she emitted a small squeak, clearly overwhelmed by the pressure.
In a barely audible whisper, she asked who you were and what was going on. The sound of her distressed voice causes you to loosen your grip, eyes softening.
"It's me... the real me."
Gangle is overwhelmed by your new appearance, taking in every detail of your new face, her eyes darting up and down as she struggles to comprehend what she's seeing.
You try to tell her that you were abstracted, but she doesn't believe you. I mean, could you blame her? As far as she knew, abstracted individuals were only ever glitchy black blobs with an unusually high number of eyes.
Despite her initial skepticism and lack of comprehension, she comes to the realization that you weren't lying, even though the concept was utterly unbelievable to her.
When she first saw you, her mind immediately went to the thought that you were another character altogether, having long forgotten what humans actually looked like. Seeing what the love of her life really looked like sent her into tears. Well, even more tears.
"Y-You're so stunning," Gangle tearfully whispered, her hands gently cupping your face as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing.
Not knowing quite how to handle the situation, you too became emotional, crying alongside her in a moment of shared vulnerability.
After the moment of emotional outpouring had subsided, you came to the realization that you had neglected to inform her about the fact that Caine was actively searching for you. You came here to hide, consumed with fear about what he might do to you if he found you.
The news that you were hiding from Caine proved to be far too much for Gangle to process at once, leaving her utterly distraught and in hysterics.
Shs was already overwhelmed with the fact that you practically admitted to giving up before you came here — she thought you could've held on for her, because she held on for you. However, she didn't want to make this about herself and kept quiet... not like she would've spoke up about such, anyways.
"W-What can I do to help you?" Gangle asked with a trembling voice, tears streaking down her cheeks.
"Please, hide me," you begged her as she wiped her eyes. "Let me hide in your room — a-and don't tell Caine where I am." With the desperation and panic in your words far too much to handle, she reached out to pull you into a comforting hug.
Gangle swore to protect you — even if she was weak, even if she was overwhelmed, even if she was confused... even if it was the last thing she'd do.
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Jax.
When he first heard knocking on his door, Jax thought that it was nothing out of the ordinary. Sure, he was confused, but laziness got the best of him, and he couldn't be bothered to get up. Besides, if you were the one knocking, you would have simply unlocked the door — considering that he gave you the key to his room.
The banging on his door refused to cease, and Jax began to be filled with annoyance. Resolving to put an end to the noise, he hastily made his way to the door and unlocked it.
Upon opening the door with quickened pace, he was greeted by a figure trying barge in seemingly against their better judgement. He was quick to react, immediately holding their hands above their head and dangling them like a dog toy.
"What's got you so antsy, eh?" Jax teased with a sly grin on his face. He tilted his head to one side as the figure hung their head low, legs attempting to kick his.
"Let me in, Jax! Please!"
As his name left the person's lips, the rabbit's eyes widened with suspicion. Without hesitation, he began to hold his guard up around the unfamiliar face, wary of their intentions and motivations. He was quick to demand who they were, shaking them around like tape stuck to his hand.
Then, your name left their lips. The unexpected mention of your name causes Jax to instinctively back away, turning to slam the door shut behind him with a loud thud.
"I'll ask ya this again, who are you?" Jax questioned, throwing the figure to the ground. He lowered his head and stared down at the intruder, who let out a small yelp and lifted their arms in surrender.
"How d'ya know our names?" He asked, this time defensive over the fact that they had brought you into this.
"You... don't recognize my voice?"
The realization soon set in, and his expression melted into one of confusion as he began to bombard you with questions about your new appearance.
As Jax continued to fire off the questions, you found yourself able to provide concise and satisfying answers quickly, without much of a struggle. However, every now and then, you were slightly tripped up by your anxiety-induced stutter.
When you began to explain your transformation into a human, Jax nodded along — gaze fixed on you. Despite his initial shock at the revelation, he wasn't overly concerned about your new appearance. Like, wow you're how you looked before you came here and remember your real name? That's cool, but you fucking abstracted to get like this?
He's a bit upset, knowing that you gave up so easily when there were still many ways to combat your decline to insanity and the challenges that came with it.
"Yeah, ya've definitely changed a little bit." He dryly joked, staring at you with a twinge of frustration washing over him.
You didn't laugh, knowing that he was upset. He doesn't outright say it, but you know what he wants to say.
"Why did you give up?"
In an attempt to shift the atmosphere and his anger off of you, you decided to bring up the topic of Caine — who you knew was actively looking for you, and you had no idea what he would do to you.
Upon learning of the ringmaster's pursuit, his expression turned sour. Without a moment's hesitation, he reached his hand behind his back, pulling out a sizable set of keys and presenting them to you.
However, as his hand reached out to offer you the keys, you quickly shook your head, trying to reason with him that you were safer in his room.
"Are ya sure?" He whispered in a low tone, looking you in your eyes. "I have keys everywhere, y'know. I can easily hide ya inna room more obscure, keep ya safe from chompy."
"But I'm safe here."
He wanted to trust your words, but he couldn't.
Not after you said that you'd never give up. You promised you'd never abstract, that you'd never lose grip of this reality.
"...Well, s'pose I trust you, lovedoll."
He kept his mouth shut.
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Kinger.
When Kinger first heard the panicked banging at his door, he rushed out of bed to unlock it.
He has this weird instinct to confront his fears before running away from them, such as the time when he sprinted towards a "sentient" bouncy ball Caine had made for an in-house adventure, only to flee from it seconds later. That's basically what he had planned to do with you, too.
Nevertheless, in contrast to many other non-playable characters Caine generates, you proved to be quicker and more adroit — you instantly grasped him before he had a chance to sprint away.
"Kinger, please be quiet," you murmured into the emptiness of his room, voice barely audible. Heaving your weight upon him, you pinned him to the floor of the room.
"W-Who... what...?!" He shrieked, and your palms instantly moved to cover where his mouth would be in hope to stop him from making any further noise.
"Calm down, Jumpy."
When hearing the nickname that only you use on him, he becomes more at ease. As his body relaxes and his gaze focuses on you with narrowed eyes, he can't help but wonder what he's looking at.
Similar to Gangle, he's completely forgotten what a human looks like. However, unlike her, who eventually came to the realization that you were a human, Kinger is completely oblivious to your identity.
At first, his initial assumption was that you had gotten a massive update or something, and that's why your appearance had changed. As you break the news to Kinger that you've abstracted back into a human, his face fills with shock and disbelief.
Sure, he is surprised that you've abstracted back into human, but on top of that, he's more surprised at how strange humans actually look. Like, he used to look like you? That's strange.
"Boy, you look weird." He mutters to himself quietly, his eyes fixed on your skin. He seems utterly fascinated by the way it looks and feels, poking it with his fingers.
"Um, thanks?" You laugh.
You spend several minutes attempting to bring Kinger back to reality. You poke him, you pat him, and you tickle him. None of these seem to get his attention, so you resort to cupping his face with your hands. Finally, he looks at you, before suddenly screaming in terror.
You quickly explain to Kinger the dire situation with Caine, explaining how you came to him in hiding from the ringmaster. As you speak, your voice turns to desperation, your fear evident in your words. He ultimately becomes speechless, unsure of what to say.
You want to have him protect you? He can do that! You wanna hide out with him? Sure, get inside his pillow fortress! You want to run away from Caine because you're scared of the inevitable torture he would probably put you through because of your "human abstraction" and you can only rely on Kinger for some reason? Great idea!
"There's no way he can find you in there. He would have to look high and low, you know!" Kinger says, patting the pillows that surround you. He gestures around your new "bed" with a grin indicated with his eyes, seemingly quite confident in its ability to conceal you from Caine's search.
"Thanks, Kinger..."
"It's my responsibility as king to protect my royal counterpart! Say, you wouldn't happen to have my glorbo in there? Oh, and my digital plate of digital mashed potatoes that I'm trying to digitally rot."
His ramblings fall deaf on your ears.
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Pomni.
The knocking at her door irritates her to no end, and she's quick to open it. She doesn't want the constant banging to play on repeat in the back of her mind, it'll probably just drive her to the brink of abstraction.
Rapidly crossing the distance from her bed to the door, she swings it open, annoyed at the incessant knocking. As she stares up at the towering figure before her, the realization set in that it was the same species she was, er, once was.
She panicked, unsure of what was going on. However, she became even more panicked when your voice left the lips of the human before her.
"W-What the %$!# is going on?" She stumbles backwards, confusion and fear etched onto her face.
"Pomni, it's me." The voice of her lover was escaping past their lips, and she had no idea why or how.
"Listen to me, please."
When you explain to her the process of how you've abstracted back into a human, she can't help but feel even more confused than before.
Based on everything she's seen and heard, abstraction was supposed to be a completely different thing, and not something that could just be reversed — hell, not something that could turn you back into a human. She can't quite wrap her head around the concept you're explaining, feeling lost as she gazes upon your new form.
As you speak to Pomni about your transformation, she gazes upon your human form with jealously. She feels a sense of unfairness, unable to process the sudden change you had and her being stuck as whatever she currently was. Her expression twists into one of defeat, lips trembling.
In spite of her growing resentment and frustration, she is quick to pick up on your desperation and sense your fear. As such, she refrains from saying anything further, recognizing that it would only make the situation worse for you. Instead, she simply stares at you, not wanting to escalate anything further.
Her shoulders tense as she processes the revelation that Caine was actively hunting you, and that you had chosen her room to take cover. She had been caught off guard by your sudden appearance as a human, and now the prospect of her lover being caught by him had left her feeling overwhelmed and scared.
Her voice becomes increasingly agitated as she realizes the gravity of the situation. "I-I don't know what I should do." She stammers, her fingers clutching at her face as she stares at you with wide, terrified eyes.
"He's going to check my room, I know he is. He'll find you, h...he'll kill you, I-I don't know!"
She's determined to keep you safe, but she quickly becomes a mess, her thoughts racing around at a hundred miles per hour. This causes her to overanalyze every single aspect of your hiding strategy, from where to how you hide. She's a mess, but she wants to keep you safe from Caine.
As Pomni processes your situation, her emotions shift once again, feeling a growing sense of determination to help you. With your safety as a priority, she internally vows to try her hardest to not only find an exit for herself, but to keep you safe as well.
The thought of you being harmed at Caine's hands is an abhorrent notion, and she is more than willing to do whatever it takes to prevent such a scenario.
Pomni grabs you by the arm, her expression determined as she leads you to the toybox. Despite your protests, she continues to push you inside, shutting the lid as fast as she opened it. She then takes a moment to gather her composure, her breath coming in short bursts as she looks over the toybox.
"N-No, that won't do at all..."
As she realizes that the toybox wasn’t the most secure option, Pomni quickly pulls you out and begins to frantically search for a new hiding spot.
She continues to utter panicked mutters, her eyes darting around the room in search of a suitable place to stash you. Her mind seems to be racing, as she tries to come up with a solution as quickly as she can.
"Pompom, calm down..."
She can't, not when she's scared for your safety.
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Ragatha.
When Ragatha heard the continuous knocking at her door, she initially hesitated, reluctant to leave the comfort of her bed at this late hour. However, the persistence of the sound urged her to action, and she quickly sprang out of bed to investigate the source of the disturbance.
Instead of the usual sight of Pomni in her doorway, asking for assistance due to having "frew up", Ragatha was greeted by a surprising and somewhat jarring appearance.
"Please, Ragatha, let me in..." Despite the confusion, she seemed to respond to the desperation in your voice, taking your hand into hers.
The distress on your face would be obvious to anyone, and your grip on her hand seemed to indicate a desperate need for comfort.
"Come in, sweetie..."
As soon as you spoke, Ragatha recognized your voice and quickly realized that you weren't just a random stranger at her doorstep. When she met your glossy eyes, she began to wonder what the hell happened to you and why you were on the brink of tears.
In that moment, you were a complete wreck... your emotions pouring out as she rubbed circles on your back, whispering soothing words and comforting pet names in your ear. You clung to her tightly, your entire body shaking as you tried to calm down, finally feeling safe in her embrace.
When you cried, it seemed as though all of your emotions flooded your body, making it difficult for you to get the words out smoothly. Ragatha held you tighter, her hands working hard to comfort you, her voice gentle and reassuring, even as you rambled on about your recent experience.
The look on her face showed that she was quite surprised that you had abstracted into a human, but you couldn't see it. She wouldn't let you see her expression, not when she felt like sobbing with you. Ragatha remained relatively still, her words few and far between, seeming to be at a loss for them as she tries to make sense of the situation.
However, her small gestures revealed that she was concerned and caring towards you, trying her best to comfort you even though she didn't fully understand what was happening. She provided you with reassurances, promising to do her best to keep you safe from Caine, even though she didn't have a full understanding of why he was targeting you. It's not like you did, either.
"Look, honey..."
Ragatha guides your gaze towards her, a tender expression on her face as she wipes away your tears with her thumbs.
"I will protect you."
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Zooble.
Zooble is the quickest of the bunch to respond to the disturbance at the door, detaching their arm from the socket of their body to answer the knocking. The hand that opens the door tries to grab you around the neck, clearly upset at having been woken up in the middle of the night.
The moment you let out a panicked plea, the hand immediately loosens its grip on your neck, allowing you to breathe again. Soon, you hear the sound of someone, obviously Zooble, moving rapidly from within the room and towards the door.
As they see you standing at the entrance with the appearance of a human, they seem to have a moment where they question their sanity.
"What... the %$!# happened to you?" Zooble muttered with wide eyes. They seem to have completely forgotten about the fact that they tried to strangle you a few moments ago.
"Help me..."
They're quick to grab both of your shoulders, pulling you inside with an almost desperate urgency.
As soon as you're pulled inside, Zooble begins bombarding you with questions, hand gripping you tightly. The tone of their voice is intense, as if they are desperate to get some answers from you.
When you explain the whole situation to them, their eyes only seem to grow wider, as if they're having a hard time wrapping their head around the reality of what you're telling them. To them, the idea of abstracting into a human is completely new, and they seem almost unable to believe that it's actually possible.
Once you finish explaining everything, their rage starts to dissipate. Despite their initial anger at you for abstracting, they eventually come to terms with what's happened and begin to see things from your perspective.
You mention Caine, and their demeanor changes almost instantly. They go from having a calm and understanding demeanor to one of tension and concern. Zooble seems to understand the gravity of the situation, and the possibility that Caine could be a real threat to you. They take a moment to process everything you've told them, trying to make sense of the situation and what to do next.
Their tone begins to soften, and they begin to offer you support. While they may not have all the answers, they're willing to help and support you in any way they can.
"Maybe... we pretend that you're a new character." They suggest, their voice low, as if they don't want anyone else to hear their plan. They look into your eyes, clearly trying to see if you're on board with the idea.
"I don't think Caine knows what a human actually looks like."
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© rhystial 2023 — my works may not be reproduced in any form and by any means without my consent/permission, translating my works is only okay if i give you the okay.
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skyeslittlecorner · 1 month
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hiyaa!! can i request the king’s reaction to gabriel attempting to kill mc when they aren’t there? he does succeed in slashing their arm a bit, where mc crouches in pain while trying to stop the bleeding.
(your blog is my fav btw i love all of your stuff! <3)
First, let me be a nerd as I explain one thing, because I know that not everyone has been in the fandom from the beginning, and this fact was mentioned in the very first event. Gabriel's scythe kills on touch. It is a gift from god that even kings avoid because just one scratch means death.
I don't know if you were aware of this, dear anon, when you asked for this headcanon (if you wanted a less drastic scenario, please let me know, I'll gladly write a second one!). Get ready for angst.
(And! Thank you for kind words! You have no idea how nice to hear that <;3)
Satan reacted as befitted his sin. Wrath. Rage. Breakdown. A red, thick fog flowed into the streets, only choking the subordinates, but sweeping away the angels. They couldn't stand the mourning that poured out of him, and they died in agony as long as he held your dying body in his arms. This was the only day in the history of Gehenna when the devils lost their will to fight and their king almost followed you into the arms of death, fighting more fiercely than ever before.
You fulfilled your promise. You died to protect Hell. And he failed to protect you. Once you were buried in a beautiful, simple grave, Satan had only one thing on his mind. He promised you that he would be faithful, only yours, for millennia. And he will keep that promise. No lovers, no one-night stands. He couldn't protect you, but he can protect the one you did all this for. Minhyeok and his later children won't even be aware of it, but they have just gained a pure white, red-eyed guardian.
Beelzebub felt you dying rather than saw you. By the time he appeared at your side, it was too late. There was almost no blood flowing, but you both knew that this wound would never heal. He kissed you and whispered soothingly as you died. It was his fault. His damn eternal wandering. If he had stayed, if he had watched you better... You deserved more than being buried among his clones. You should rest with those who, unlike him, did protect you. With your parents. He will show up with your body on Minhyeok's doorstep, hoping that he will get angry and yell at him, but he will only break down in tears over your body. This is not enough for Beelzebub, this is worse than the punishment he expected. He doesn't feel worthy of attending your funeral, but he'll watch from afar anyway.
Your tombstone will always look like new, even for hundreds of years. Intact stone, fresh flowers. There are things that even Beelzebub cannot forget.
Leviathan won't let you die. No, just no. No way. Do not agree. The moment you get hurt, he will catch you in his arms. The face is colder than usual, but the voice is more soothing than ever. "Do not be afraid. You are mine, and I am not letting you go.” He will kiss you one last time and push you into his coffin. Suspended somewhere between worlds, not dead, but not alive either, you will be pushed into eternal sleep, barely remembering who you are.
Leviathan won't stop there, he has to get you back. Only god can save you from death, and if that means this devil has to find him, he will. Anything to get you back to his side. He won't agree to lose another person he loves.
This time Mammon is the spoiled one
MAMMON
The shield you raised could withstand anything - or so you thought, until Gabriel cut through it like a knife through wax. The wound on your forearm was minor. Almost invisible. Still, you stared at it in silence, dazed. You knew what that meant.
A fist sprung in front of your nose a second too late. Shooed the seraph away a second too late. Your life could have been saved. A second too late.
"Master! Are you okay?" Mammon caught up with you and grabbed you in his arms. The grogginess slowly turned into dizziness. You collapsed onto his chest, losing strength.
"He... hurt me." You whispered into his broad chest. His muscles tensed as if ready to attack, but the huge arms lifted you ever so gently. You felt like you were in a huge cradle. The consciousness that slowly drained from your body was glad that it was spending its last moments in these arms.
The king held your limp body for a long time. He couldn't say goodbye to you, he couldn't understand that he had lost you. That you already had left this Hell, and there was nothing he could do about it.
A huge mausoleum was built in the meadow where you died. Gold and silk blinded the inhabitants from afar, outshining the sun itself. Despite the splendor greater than in the palace, everyone considered your tomb to be the poorest place in the world. Mammon visited it every day. He reminded himself that he needed to protect his people better. That he should have protected you better. For the first time in his life he felt real loss.
It was here that Tartaros' greatest treasure was lost.
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nyerusnova · 8 months
Text
Glad to see that Tim being a giant Dick Grayson fanboy is finally being highlighted again, and sparking more discussion especially on their early relationship! (Please gimme more!!! I love them so much, augh!)
Probably as a result of that surge, there seems to be reciprocal chatter on the topic of how young Tim actually felt towards Jason, too. It's honestly pretty interesting, because it's more nuanced than it appears at first glance.
Which means it's very fun to dissect! ✨
There's a degree of subjectivity to keep in mind, because readers are going to have different interpretations of the same scenes, or will pull from entirely different scenes than one another to form their individual view on this topic. That's just how it is in comic book fandom, for many things! Regardless, in this case... if the scale ranges from the extreme of "Jason was Tim's Robin" to the other extreme of "Tim actually hated Jason [as Robin] or thought he was a loser that got himself killed" — the actual truth is closer to the middle, as is often the case.
At least, in my opinion.
Mainly I want to focus on those relatively early days with this post, to highlight Tim's initial(-ish) feelings towards his heroes, and touch on the point at which they really begin to change. This turned into a very long post, though. Brevity is beyond my skill, so grab snacks and water lol. Transcripts for each image will be posted at the very end under the cut.
So, the two storylines I want to cover are "Rite of Passage," which is rolls into "Identity Crisis." (NOT to be confused with the major crossover event "Identity Crisis™" which came years later, and is where Jack Drake dies.... But it sure is an interesting coincidence that Tim deals with the loss of each parent in two similarly named stories!) These take place before Tim is even Robin, and I'll be considering them as one arc for this post.
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Detective Comics vol. 1 #618 (July, 1990) -- Pages 1 & 2
"When Gotham needed him, he was there. When the Batman needed him, he was there. He was a hero."
"One day, I'll be as good as Jason. One day I'll wear the suit."
To start off, we have this opening from "Rite of Passage." Tim is still in training here, mainly helping Bruce with minor stuff from the cave. His parents are off traveling, alive and well as of these next few pages. He's still bright-eyed and full of wonder. An extraordinarily weird but ultimately innocent kid.
So his view on Jason is positive and fairly simple: a hero, and someone to look up to as Robin. Clearly, Tim here doesn't think Jason was deficient in his role, either as a protector of Gotham or as Batman's trusted partner.
Moreover, Tim already held Dick in very high regard because he was amazingly skilled before he became Robin. To Tim, that's not something he'll ever be able to achieve. Meanwhile, Jason wasn't like that. He was a regular kid without crazy acrobatic training since practically birth. Yet he still went on to be a hero—which is obviously motivational for Tim who finds himself in similar shoes.
It's true that Tim only ever knew or thought of Jason as Robin, and idolized him in that regard. But that's kind of all that mattered to him at that point, because he was this kid who was utterly star-struck by his heroes. Even if he's technically aware of their shortcomings as people, it's overshadowed by the hero-worship.
It was kind of the same with Bruce as Batman at first. (Which was still enough for Tim to risk life and limb to help his beloved hero, before Bruce even knew his name.) Dick was the only one Tim had any sort of "personal" relationship with beforehand, so there is an extra level of attachment—and hence why it was the nidus for his obsession with Batman. Yet even then, it wasn't like he actually knew anything about Dick as a person until later. Until then, Tim's ideas of him were all he had, too. With Jason, Tim just didn't get to know him at any point before his return (oof), apart from what he heard over the years secondhand (also oof).
Ultimately, it's the loss of innocence—along with the ricocheting bullet that is the unresolved guilt of those around him—that begins to change Tim's perception. Not just of Jason, but of things in general.
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Batman vol. 1 #455 (Oct., 1990) -- Page 13
"I know why they do it now. Why they put on the suits, and the masks, and go out into the night. They're angry, they're full of rage. They want to hit back."
Losing his mother was a major shift for Tim, obviously. This is right after the previous storyline, and Tim's had the worst week or two of his life (so far). His monologue here is a reference to what happened to both Dick and Jason. The unbearable pain of loss, the rage masking the grief underneath. And importantly, that he feels both of them were justified in their anger. (And Bruce too, indirectly.)
The major theme of the aptly named "Identity Crisis" is to mirror aspects of Dick and Jason and Tim's lives—to show how they converged onto the same tragic road. It's something that Tim notices early in the story, and was frightened by. Now, horrifically, it's become a part of him as well. His parents are gone, and he was entirely helpless to do anything about it. Dick was the same way, Jason was the same way. The cycle is repeated.
In particular, the part about him wanting to go to Haiti for revenge—for his mother—sort of struck me as being an intentional parallel to Jason and Ethiopia. It's a bit of a stretch, especially in isolation, so others may see it differently (e.g. the angry ramblings of a grieving child that does sound like something anyone might say). But it always stuck out to me because of how much Tim is compared directly to Jason in this arc. More on that below.
It's not something I can really give an accurate feel of because it's a lot of subtle things that begin to add up, so I'd encourage folks to read this arc themselves to see what I mean. (Or maybe you'll still disagree which is fine too lol.) Again, many things are in reference to both Dick and Jason in relation to Tim, but it's weighted more on Jason's side.
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Batman vol. 1 #455 (Oct., 1990) -- Page 18
"You think my anger will boil over, the way Jason's did. I can assure you, it won't!"
Tim's grief has begun to pull away the veil of idealism that enshrouded his heroes in his mind. It doesn't apply only to Jason, but to the rest of them. Plus add the fact that Tim's keenly aware that he's being managed, even if the adults around him are careful to not outright say certain things. He still knows.
Bruce, Dick, and Alfred are all worried about Tim potentially turning into "another Jason." They (and mainly Bruce) caution Tim to not ignore his emotions, but they're still concerned that he may be overly eager to prove himself in order to cope, and could get hurt or killed as a result. While they aren't wrong for their caution—especially at how unsettlingly similar all the circumstances are—they aren't very subtle about the elephant in the room.
Imagine how that would affect Tim's perception of his predecessor, especially when he's in the midst of a traumatic event he hasn't had time to fully process. The negative association is pretty much inevitable.
Tim's known from day one that he's walking in Jason's shadow, and now it's become inescapable. Tim went from seeing Jason as a goal to reach, to feeling that unless he surpasses him, he wasn't going to be taken seriously by anyone. However, as of this arc, Tim doesn't even fully come to that point yet.
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Batman vol. 1 #456 (Nov., 1990) -- Pages 14 & 15
"Drop-outs don't make it. And dead heroes are no use to anyone!"
It's really easy to take away "Tim totally thought Jason got himself killed" as the main thing here, but I think that's missing the forest for the trees.
First some context: Bruce has gone out on a mission to get Scarecrow, and expressly forbade Tim from doing any shenanigans. Meanwhile, Tim is grappling with wanting to prove himself and trying to help Bruce from the cave, all while trying to deal with his emotions. At some point, he falls asleep and ends up having like... exhaustion-grief hallucinations of Dick!Robin and Jason!Robin who confusingly caution yet encourage him. The main theme of this part is facing your fears.
Depending on how you want to interpret the intent of Jason's dialogue here, you could go several ways with it. Ranging from "writer's feelings towards Jason" to "a peek into Tim's mind as his fears manifest as visions of his heroes" or some mixture thereof.
Though Tim argues with Bruce that Batman needs a Robin, we're shown that Tim is understandably scared of joining Batman's "war." He's still not willing to let Bruce go it alone, though, and that's something he feels more strongly than his fear.
Meanwhile, hallucination!Jason's warnings are a lamentation of what happened to him in a way, but it actually exactly describes Tim's current situation even more so. Unlike Jason, Tim is under-trained, under-experienced, doesn't even have a suit of his own yet. But like Jason, he can't sit by and do nothing while someone he cares about is in danger. Tim knows that if he goes out there, he will probably get himself killed, and it will be his own fault. So he's about to disobey Batman's orders, and fly right into danger. If that got Jason killed, then Tim—who is in a way worse position experience-wise—has every chance of ending up the same.
Like... it's about Jason, but it's also about Tim. It's Tim's worst fears made manifest, via the representation of why he is even here in the first place (Jason's death).
That's my theory anyway, but perhaps this is an overly charitable reading of this scene on my end. (Not that I think that makes me wrong lol.) However given that Grant wrote both parts of this arc, and the beginning of which is especially favorable towards Jason, it certainly is something to ponder. I have a lot of thoughts on it I can't expand on here tbh but perhaps that'll be another post.
Anyway, returning to the point of the similarities vs differences between Tim and Jason: since this is the arc that solidified Tim as the next Robin in comic continuity, it makes sense that the writers really pushed the comparisons between the two of them, specifically. (Even though Dick was pretty similar, as going against Batman's orders is the Robin thing to do, it's not his shoes Tim is directly filling.) So making Tim's "debut" story arc mirror Jason's "swansong" is an obvious narrative choice.
To drive home the parallels, I wanted to include this panel from just a few pages prior to the "daydream":
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Batman vol. 1 #456 (Nov., 1990) -- Page 9
"The suit is magic."
That so distressingly close to Jason's famous "being Robin gives me magic" line (Batman #385, page 6). Given all the previous context, it's hard for me to just dismiss it as pure coincidence. Even if it is, the point still stands. Tim is shown having the some of the same heartbreakingly naive views as Jason once did, right in front of Jason's memorial, just as he's about to go and run off into the night against orders.
I think that speaks for itself. There's a lot to take away from it, if you so choose. Especially given the context of that specific Jason arc.
Alright, back to the main course:
So in the end, Tim actually goes out in civvies and a ski mask because if he fails, then at least he wouldn't bring shame to Robin's legacy™. When he gets fear gassed saving Batman, it's once again both Dick and Jason that he hallucinates encouraging him to push past his fear. (Shout out to the fact that he's literally more afraid of tarnishing the legacy of Batman & Robin than he is of dying.... I'm sure this will not be a recurring thing for him in the future.)
Tim's ideology is shown to be similar to Jason's, and the actions Tim ultimately takes are similar to Jason's... but the outcome is different. And it really isn't just "Tim succeeded where Jason failed." At least, that's not what I took away from this. Rather, Tim had no reason to succeed any more than he had to fail, just that he did. Luck combined with caution because he knew what happened to his predecessor, and the fact that Batman was there to finish the job all made the difference.
You could say (and I know some will) that it's just classic Jason character assassination and the writers trying to implore readers that this new kid is different we promise pls don't hate us look how much better he is! But in this case, that feels like it undermines the whole point of this story. It doesn't fit with what the characters actually say.
Thus, we return to the question of how Tim felt towards his predecessor. And the answer is different from where we started, because Tim is different. Not that different though. Because even though at this point Tim—like all the adults around him—has probably attributed Jason "going off on his own" being what led to his death, Tim still thought of him as a hero to look up to. It's about Robin, first and foremost, yes. But Tim is fully aware of the people who made that suit mean what it does, because it's all intertwined.
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Batman vol. 1 #457 (Dec., 1990) -- Page 20
"I mean--Dick made it into a symbol the whole world knows. Jason gave his life for it."
Even further, Tim thinks of it in terms of Jason having given his life for what he believed in, for the legacy that now falls to Tim. There's a sense of gravitas there. He's afraid of failing both the Robins who came before him.
Ultimately do I think Tim adored and loved Jason on the same level as Dick or something? No. It's not comparable. (Dick was like part of some of Tim's earliest memories and everything! They have a really unique bond ok.) Yet Tim was also far from thinking poorly of Jason so early on. Frankly, it seems that Tim thought of Jason as a noble hero and a cautionary tale. Yes he took risks and sometimes went too far, generally stuff that Tim doesn't want to repeat and all that. At the same time, Tim still saw him as someone whose legacy and memory was worth honoring.
It's complicated, which is why I like it so much—because it feels real. Having conflicting feelings towards someone is... so human. Especially someone you never got to know, yet who plays such an integral role in your life via the shadow of their death. How can you feel anything but complicated towards them?
It has to be said that, yes, Tim's views—even before Jason's return—change over the years. He becomes more jaded as a person and is surrounded by people who are even more jaded than him... and who often mention Jason as the "failed Robin." It's something that's hung over Tim's head all the damn time. The curse of the Robin mantle.
So it shouldn't come as a surprise that Tim's idea of him becomes more akin to "sounds like a skill issue" as the years go by. All bets are off after Jason's return, and the Titans Tower Incident™. At that point it's firmly "I am better than you, loser" lmao.
And... that's all without getting too into things like authorial intent and general "moods" of different DC writers towards Jason at a given point. Or retcons that played a role in his characterization and how other characters talk about him, depending on what "era" you're reading. That's way beyond the scope of this post though!
TLDR; even though young Tim Drake was obsessed with Dick Grayson as Robin, he still looked up to Jason Todd as well. He didn't think of Jason as a cringefail loser until later. :)
(image dialogue transcripts under cut ↓)
Dialogue Transcript for Image 1 (Detective Comics vol. 1 #618 -- Page 1):
Narration box (Tim): When Gotham needed him, he was there. When the Batman needed him, he was there. He was a hero.
Dialogue Transcript for Image 2 (Detective Comics vol. 1 #618 -- Page 2):
(Scene continued from previous page)
Narration box: But he was nothing special, really. Just a boy, who was taught--trained--brought to his full potential by someone who knew how. Just a boy... like me. I know I can do it. I know I can. One day I'll be as good as Jason. One day I'll wear the suit. One day I'll be a hero.
Dialogue Transcript for Image 3 (Batman vol. 1 #455 -- Page 13):
Tim: I hate him! I hate him! I know why they do it now. Why they put on the suits, and the masks, and go out into the night. They're angry. Full of rage. They want to hit back. They want to fill the hole that's burning inside them.
Bruce: There's more to it than that, son. Much more.
Tim: I know. It's just--I feel--like going to Haiti myself and strangling that creep with my bare hands!
Bruce: The Obeah Man will spend the rest of his life in a prison hospital. He's history. Forget him! But don't fight against your anger. It's natural. Accept it. Live with it. One day it'll be your friend.
Dialogue Transcript for Image 4 (Batman vol. 1 #455 -- Panels from page 18):
Tim: Because you think my mother's death has upset me too much. Well, it did. But I've taken your words to heart. I can cope. You think my anger will boil over, the way Jason's did. I can assure you, it won't. But that doesn't make any difference, does it? Why can't you have a little faith in me?
Dialogue Transcript for Image 5 (Batman vol. 1 #456 -- Page 14):
Narration box (Tim): Blast it! My head's starting to swim. I'm about ready to give up. I almost wish I'd never heard of Batman and Robin!
Vision Dick: Heroes never give up, Tim.
Vision Jason: You know that.
Tim: Dick--! Jason Todd!
Vision Dick: You're training to fight in a war, Tim. It'll last all your life. No matter what, you have to go on fighting.
Vision Jason: Drop-outs don't make it. And dead heroes are no use to anyone! I thought I knew better than Batman. I thought I could run before I could walk. I killed myself, Tim. Because I couldn't wait. Because I couldn't think it through.
Dialogue Transcript for Image 6 (Batman vol. 1 #456 -- Page 15):
(Scene continued from previous page)
Vision Dick: Think, Tim. Concentrate!
Vision Jason: You can do it.
Both: You can do it!
Tim, waking up: What--? Robin...?
Narration box (Tim): I must have been daydreaming. They're right, though. There's a solution to everything. I can find it! So here I go again... Whim. Caprice. Doing something without forethought.
Dialogue Transcript for Image 7 (Batman vol. 1 #456 -- Panel from page 9):
Narration box (Tim): The suit is magic. It gives you power. It hides your weakness. It makes you give it everything you've got. It makes you a hero. If only I could!
Dialogue Transcript for Image 8 (Batman vol. 1 #457 -- Page 20):
Bruce: Are you afraid of it?
Tim: No. It isn't fear. It's more... the suit carries so much history. I mean--Dick made it into a symbol the whole world knows. Jason gave his life for it. Failing them--what they fought so hard to build--that's what worries me!
Bruce: I appreciate that, Tim. That costume weighs a whole lot more than any symbol should... and I'd be failing you if I expected you to bear that weight. So... let me know what you think.
Narration box: A mask has a double edged, he said. It hides your own anxiety as it strikes fear into your enemy.
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