#lose weight after childbirth

[donotpush]

Birth of Heracles

this is a commission for @thebabyscomingnow, an erotic retelling of Heracles’ birth! with everything you could wish for: greek mythology, birth denial and hot, difficult labor. hope you enjoy as much as i did :)

The savage movements of the child in her womb were eager to steal moans from Alcmene’s lips. The Princess of Mycenae had become a throbbing, whimpering mess in the sheets of the King’s bed.

Her son was huge. With every little movement, she could feel the weight of the baby pinning her down, making her lose balance. Of course, it must be like father, like son; there was something deep inside her that told her, since the moment she confirmed the new life growing inside her womb, that it was special.

She was the bearer of a beauty that made men weak in the knees and caused women to look twice, and of course that it would catch the eye of unexpected guests into her life.

Being impregnated by the god of gods himself was definitely one of them.

Her water broke the night before. The contractions came and went, remaining in a not very concise wave, varying in pain and intensity as if they were just casual cramps. At some point, the contractions had completely stopped, leaving Alcmene sagging in discomfort and mild agony.

She didn’t know what was worse at this point—to push that baby out or to keep it inside her, the massive weight of it resting on her pelvis.

She was sure it was a boy. It had to be. Vigorous and sturdy, just like his father, her son only proved to be the owner of enviable strength and energy, even in the womb.

***

If there was something Zeus could be proud of, it was every single one of his offspring. And all the tricks and feats he managed to pull just to get it his way. And now, contemplating the beautiful, delicate frame of Alcmene’s body being disrupted by his son, her gravid stomach was almost coarse in comparison with her delicate beauty; more than proud, he was horny.

As the pregnancy progressed, he would only find delight in seeing his unborn child grow. To the surprise of no one, his wife wasn’t as happy as him.

"You bastard! How dare you!?" or something along those lines was the only thing he received when Hera found out, but he was used to Hera's rage.

And jealousy. It seemed that his desire for the fertile body of Alcmene grew in pair with Hera's wrath.

Zeus watched as Alcmene rocked her hips in the air, her naked body glistening under the light of the candles in the room. The way her gravid stomach hung low under her as she swayed back and forth, how she moved with her hips in the air, how she lowered herself against the bed, arching her back and rocking her hips as her gravid stomach pressed against the mattress

He was responsible for making her labor progress as he wished. And Zeus wanted to start easy, to take in every bit and savor it slowly: let Alcmene get used to the feelings slowly.

Let her enjoy every single moment of childbirth as much as she could.

Her water broke after hours of leaking; the contractions were slow, steady, and so far from each other that you wouldn't even consider them labor. The baby was so, so slowly descending in her pelvis that Alcmene would only realize it when her walk turned into a waddle; her calm breathing became sturdy, and her steady sighs became unashamed moans and whimpers.

Zeus was enjoying it. Just at the thought of seeing his child being born, storms would fill Zeus' glistening eyes.

***

Alcemene pulled her legs down to the side of the bed, placing both hands beside her body before taking a deep breath and pushing through to pull herself up. A sigh escaped her lips when she finally managed to stand up, with a hand on the wall to stabilize her. She reached her arm to her lower back for support.

Waddling, she made her way to throw over herself a robe. These days, the only comfort she could find was in letting her sensitive body be bare. At the same moment, her husband made his way into the room.

Amphitryon looked her over. Her face was flushed, her hair disheveled, but her body still carried its own unique grace.

"Tomorrow there is going to be a meeting with all the generals to discuss... important things," Amphitryon announced in the most casual tone, "and I need you there."

This sentence caught Alcmene off guard; usually, she was not asked by her husband to attend meetings; war was not something she was fond of; and she found no interest in politics, but she nodded nonetheless. What her husband said, she did.

"I don’t think..." Her words were interrupted by a small cramp. "Ugh… I don’t think my presence can be any useful."

"A beautiful woman's presence is always good," her husband replied, looking at her over his shoulder. "A good reminder of what we're fighting for, mhm?"

"But…"

Ampythrion turned towards her, smiling lightly as he walked over to place a kiss on her temple. Well, if her presence would be useful, even if it just to boost morale.

"I insist." Amphitryon slid his hand under the robe, pressing against the tender flesh of the gravid stomach. "You have been like this for days. He isn't going to be born tomorrow. We both know this can take days."

Indeed, it didn’t seem like it. Her pleas were interrupted when the man held his finger up in the air, shushing her before starting to make his way out of the room.

"We'll be waiting for you."

***

"I simply cannot believe that you would do this…" The scream echoed in Zeus' ears' "...again!"

The goddess crossed her arms against her chest, stomping her foot against the floor. She was furious and raging with Zeus and with that woman. How could Alcmene be so oblivious about her husband's antics? Wasn't it obvious to everyone?

Well, it is late now. What’s done, it's done. Hera should have complained nine months ago, not now.

For Hera, it was in the way his eyes darkened, the way his lips parted, and the way his hand was clutching tightly to the armrest. Zeus was enjoying it, watching the woman enjoy the fruits of his labor nine months ago.

"Can't you be happy?" He shrugged, "A king is being born today!" Zeus slammed his hand against the armrest. "Son of mine, strong and born to rule!"

"You're enjoying it, don’t you?"

The burning fire in Hera’s eyes became quiet, her gaze wandering in the nothingness for a moment. She had a way better idea than to argue with an old man. Zeus couldn’t care less what her opinion was. But it would serve her right to remain quiet. If he was enjoying Alcemene's labor with such joy, who was she to private him from such a simple pleasure?

Alcmene wasn’t going to give birth. She wasn't going to give Zeus that one pleasure. 

***

"Ilithyia'' Hera's voice rang in her ears, and the gravid goddess turned around to see the face of rage.

Hera was fuming, stomping towards her. Moving a hand behind her back and another under her stomach for support, Ilithyia stood up, waddling to meet Hera with a small smile. The goddess of childbirth, glowing and gravid as always, tended to be a pleasure to deal with for Hera. Only with exceptions, like right now. Hera approached the goddess, grabbing a hold of her shoulders, her fingers digging at the soft skin.

"Alcmene…" Hera began but was unable to finish her sentence.

"Yes! She’s looking forward to giving birth to a wonderful baby boy!" The pregnant woman cheered, rubbing her stomach excitedly.

"Listen," Hera raised her eyebrows, emphasizing every one of her words, "Alcmene won’t give birth today."

Ilithyia frowned in confusion, tilting her head slightly, she remained quiet. She knew better than to question Hera.

Hera released her grip on her shoulders, her mouth set in a thin line as she stepped back.

"This is an order, Ilithyia," the woman said. "Sit down. Under no circumstances, Alcmene can give birth today."

***

Alcmene squirmed, trying to dissimulate her constant shifting and changing positions on the uncomfortable chair with a small cough. Her back was on fire, and the pressure that slowly but surely was forming in her pelvis only grew more and more powerful, almost impossible to ignore now.

She tried all the positions that her body allowed her to contort into to look for a bit of comfort, but she always ended up the same: her legs spread and her head almost thrown back, her huge belly resting between her hips.

She spent a restless night, moving around and groaning and panting. Every time it seemed like things were going to progress, they stopped. No contractions, no need to push—just the uncomfortable weight of the baby’s head resting on her pelvis. 

So against her pleas, her husband still dragged her along to the council meeting.

War, travel, plans and maps. The words of the men in front of her went in one ear and out the other, unable to focus on something that wasn't the sensations cruising through her body. It was a buildup of everything—the unexpected contractions she was unable to predict, the sensitive skin of her taut stomach, the heaviness of her breasts. The way the baby was positioned so, so low that it was painful to do anything.

A drop of sweat traveled down her forehead, falling to stain her dress. She looked down to find that her breasts were leaking, leaving wet patches on her chest.

It was a travesty to find something to wear lately that didn't rub her body in the wrong ways; everything seemed too tight, too harsh, too suffocating. Alcmene had resorted to being naked most of the time, but clearly, a council meeting wasn't good scenery to be like that.

She threw on herself the first thing she found, the chiton specially confected for her. Some other time, it would have been a pleasure to have such genteel fabrics covering her body. But now she despised it.

The fabric was constantly rubbing against her way too sensitive nipples, she was starting to leak. If she had had one more minute to consider her dressing, this wouldn't be happening.

A sharp pain shot through her abdomen. Alcmene hunched forward, one of her hands moving to bury itself under her belly and the other to grip the armrest of the chair.

In front of her, the group of men engrossed in their conversation ceased their conversation in unison, turning their attention to the woman behind them.

"Sorry," Alcmene panted. "Please... continue. Do not mind me."

Amphitryon cleared his throat, gathering the men's attention back to him.

She parted her lips slightly, letting out a slow breath as her hand massaged her womb where she could reach, trying to soothe herself. The pressure between her legs was intensifying.

Until a few hours ago, she was able to try and distract herself from it. She tried to lose herself in thought, counting the cracks in the ceiling and the tiles on the floor, but now it was impossible to ignore. Her body was sending all the signals that she wanted this baby out, and her brain wasn't able to brush them off now. She was in labor, and there was a baby coming.

Alcmene excused herself from the meeting, politely whispering to the woman sitting next to her that she needed a moment to collect herself. Every step to the door felt heavy, each movement was making her entire body ache. She swore she could feel the eyes of everyone burning on her back as she walked away, but when she looked over her shoulder, nobody was staring. Everyone else seemed to be deep in their own thoughts, engrossed in their work.

She stumbled into the hallway. Leaning against the cool stone wall of the hallway, Alcmene took deep breaths, trying to steady herself amidst the waves of pain. The sound of her own heartbeat echoed in her ears, and she closed her eyes, focusing on the rhythm of her breathing.

She realized how wide her legs were forced apart by the massive weight of the baby’s head resting low on her hips and how close it was. Her hands rested over her abdomen, gently massaging the muscles under her skin, trying to relax them and relieve some of the pressure, but she soon found herself panting when another contraction took over.

Alcmene forced herself to take a step, then another, and every moment that passed, it felt as if the baby's head was forcing her lips apart wider.

As soon as she was out of sight, Alcmene’s face contorted into a grimace as she squatted down, her hands turning into fists as she gripped the fabric of her clothes to pull it up her knees and pushed.

Now, it was as if all the progress that she should’ve had in the past hours was coming all over her in one fast and furious wave. It was as if her baby was ready to come out, but her body wasn’t cooperating.

She slid her hand between her legs, tracing the bulging shape of her pussy lips, and a low groan vibrated in her throat. Her shoulders tensed and her knuckles turned white as she gathered all the strength she could think of at the moment, forcing her chin to her chest as she pushed.

Her nails dug into her thighs as she let out a strangled cry. Her eyes squeezed shut and her arms trembled from the effort, but it seemed like she was going nowhere.

"Ughnn!" Alcmene pressed the palm of her hand against the crowning head, and she felt it move slowly for a bit before it slid back inside. "Ah! Ugh…!"

***

"Stand up!"

 "Do not you dare!"

On one side: Hera's voice, on the other: Zeus' screams.

The screaming contest was driving Ilithyia crazy. The goddess of childbirth moved her hand to rub her fertile womb, feeling the life inside of her squirming. Hera was very clear with her order: to prevent Alcmene from giving birth today. But it also meant to face the rage of Zeus for ruining his little party.

Cross-legged, Ilithyia cleared her throat, shifting her hips to accommodate and find a more comfortable position with the imminent life that was coming down her birth canal.

"Ilithyia!" Zeus barked, "Stand up now, you don’t want to face the consequences later!"

The goddess gulped, feeling the familiar pressure that accompanied the impending push start to grow and spread through her body. She looked between Zeus and Hera, her face scrunched up in irresolution.

***

Alcmene felt her whole upper body tense up as she breathed in, closing her eyes and focusing on pushing. She pushed with all her might. Panting, her eyes rolled to the back of her head, and she couldn’t help but cry out when the weight of the baby moved down her birth canal.

Her knees buckled beneath her, and Alcmene fell to the ground. Her body was trembling with every contraction, hands clutching tightly to the material of her clothes as a loud moan escaped her lips when she finally felt the head, this time moving forward down her entrance with a push.

A bit, just a little inch, but it was enough to make Alcmene let out a loud breath, sighing in relief that this time her efforts were actually doing something. She inhaled again, her hands clenching as she closed her eyes and pushed again, biting her lips to contain a scream.

"Mhgn!"  Her face became red, and sweat was now covering her whole body. "Gods…!"

With a loud groan, her hands pressed against the cold floor as her body tensed in another push, the contractions now piling on top of each other as her body was washed over by an overwhelming urge to push that baby out.

The pain, the pressure. Alcmene gritted her teeth, her eyebrows furrowing as she focused on pushing with all her might with the next contraction that ripped through her stomach.

"Aughn!" Alcmene cried out, her head falling backward as her eyes flew open.

The baby’s head pushed on and stretched her entrance, Alcmene’s legs trembling and treating to close, trying to escape from the pain, from the burning feeling of the head stretching her open.

She remained there, puffing as her chest rose and fell wildly. It was that she wanted to feel the painful stretch of the head coming to its biggest point, but she was afraid to tear if the head came out too fast.

She moved one of her hands over her stomach to grace her fingertips over the shape of the baby’s head. Someone was coming from the other side of the hallway, their footsteps echoing in the air, but everything Alcmene could focus on was the baby crowning between her legs. She had left all decorum and modesty behind a long time ago.

Taking a deep breath in, pulling her chin to her chest and closing her eyes, she pushed. Her hips moved upwards in the air, her forehead resting against the cold floor and her legs trembled as the head slowly made its way out.

With a grunt, her hips jerked upwards again, and she screamed into her clenched fists.

A gush of amniotic liquid rushed out of her, the wet fabric of her gown sticking to her thighs and to her sweaty body. All of her ached, from her sensitive, leaking breasts to the taut skin of her contracting stomach; the worst of it was her crowning pussy. 

Alcmene pushed, every muscle in her body tensing with the effort, and with a gush, the massive head of the baby popped out of her. She gasped, and then she felt the feeling of a warm hand pressing against her lower back.

She tilted her head over her shoulder to find a man kneeling behind her, catching the baby’s head.

Alcmene closed her eyes again, resting her forehead against the floor as she panted heavily. Her lips turned into a thin line to keep the moans contained. Taking a deep breath, she focused on pushing as soon as the next contraction took over. Slowly, the shoulders started to make their way out of her.

"Nhgn!"  Alcmene whimpered, her back arching in an attempt to escape the pain. "Ohhhhhhhh!"

She cried, gripping onto the floor desperately as she gritted her teeth, her body tensing as she pushed again. After what seemed to be an eternity of pushing and squirming, the shoulders were out, and the rest of the baby's body came out.

Alcmene gasped for air, her eyes screwed up as sweat trickled down her temples. 

Breathing hard and fast, she remained there, trying to catch her breath.

Next one? Alcmene opened her eyes, looking around to see what he was talking about, but she was interrupted when another cramp hit her. She grunted, and her eyes opened wide when she felt something coming down her birth canal.

As she felt the mass descend rapidly, Alcmene panted when a contraction hit her again. Soon, she felt that familiar feeling taking over her again: she needed to push. 

Again.

The head of another baby was descending slowly through her birth canal. Faster than the last one, her body seemed to do what she knew, and pushing with every contraction, the head descended faster, crowning in a matter of just a few pushes. 

This one was smaller than its brother.

"Ughn!"  Alcmene groaned loudly when the head stretched her open again, and with a small grunt, she pushed it out. "Ah!"

The rest of the body came out easily, and soon Alcemene found herself holding two small babies against her chest, the two boys sucking frantically at her breasts.

"Alcides...and Iphicles," she whispered to the children. The names sounded strangely beautiful rolling off her tongue.

#comissions #@thebabyiscomingnow #public birth #birth kink #pregnancy #labor #birth denial #pregnancy fantasy #fpreg #greek mythology #stories

[cialovesklopp]

une journée a trois ➻ k.mbappe

summary – they had always been two. but now that they were about to be three, they were starting a new journee. the path of parenthood. ah, the joy of pregnancy

pairing – kylian mbappé x amara imani (oc)

warnings – a somewhat detailed description of childbirth, pregnancy, mentions of morning sickness, labor, breastfeeding

word count — 10.1k

author's note – i guess this is my last official chapter for the mon amour series before i am officially starting my trent fic and the first spin off to this series. i will also be taking mon amour to wattpad where i'll add some more social media since here it came a bit short. there will be a lot of redecorating for my fics in the next time. as a heads-up: i don't know anything about childbirth, my entire knowledge is from google so i am very sorry if i got something wrong. hope you enjoy <3

    ( masterlist )

it wasn’t supposed to happen like this. she liked to have her life planned out to the finest detail. she wasn’t organized to the smallest but she liked to live her life in a certain order. so this was not supposed to happen now. there was no in-between for her situation. either women were happy or their lives were destroyed right now. and yet she found herself between the two scenarios.

she had been careful. she had put her career first and it had worked in every damn relationship she had ever had (which had not been a lot). she had made it clear that the success of her career was the most important thing and after the whole evan fiasco, she had sworn to herself that no matter how many times she fell in love, she would never lose sight again of her priorities. and it had worked till now.

it was a small mistake that led to her situation now. a moment of a certain emotional weakness that was the reason why she found herself in the bathroom on the floor with her back leaning against the bathtub as she stared into nothing.

kylian had introduced her to a new world of love. one where longing became sometimes too hard and the moment they found each other again, all rational thoughts were thrown out the window. he had shown her what love really felt like and that it was so much more than just endless fights and screaming matches. so… of course she had lost sights of her priorities and acted after her emotions when her heart had missed him too much.

her situation resulted from a sudden stay in the same city. he had been there to play an important match, she had two nights in that same city to tour and overwhelm her fans with her music. it had been three months that they hadn’t seen each other in person so the moment they had known they were at the same place, all sane thoughts had been thrown out the window. they had missed each other too much to even think about anything else than be close again. feel the other again. and now, not even two months later, she found herself on the floor in the bathroom with a stick in her hand. a small piece of plastic that held the weight of the world. two small blue lines that seemed to throw everything out of order. there seemed to be life growing inside of her now.

she wasn’t crying but rather staring into the air. her eyes held no emotion as she held the positive test in her hands. somehow it didn’t seem to set in that she carried life now in her body. that someone was breathing inside her and had their own heartbeat. it appeared surreal to her. the realization that one of her biggest fears had become true.

amara didn’t fear his reaction. that was probably the least of her problems. he had always expressed his desire for children, no matter at which point in his career he would be. he would support her, no matter what. she was the problem.

there had been warnings for this situation. women with so much potential that had been destroyed or ruined because of a child. and it wasn’t just an empty warning. she had seen it with her own eyes. linda, evan’s mother, had been the proof she had needed. a beautiful woman, beautiful and intelligent — a cunning lawyer who was at the peak of her career. but her pregnancy had ruined her and had turned her into a housewife. the vision, evan had always had of her. being pregnant just before she was about to start the second leg of her tour was the most unfortunate moment, this little gift could have come. it threw all plans out of the window.

she absolutely did not want to become one of those women who were at the peak of their career and then got it ruined by an unplanned pregnancy. it was her biggest fear. especially because she was living on the high of it at the moment. everything was going well, — she was breaking record after record — and now everything was about to stop. because she knew she would never bring it over her heart to kill the small human that seemed to be growing in her. it was a part of her now. and she could never take that decision alone.

time passed and she still found herself in the same position, her mind still processing the news. she didn’t notice kylian coming home from training and calling her name. her senses picked up his smell and noticed his presence but her brain felt disconnected to the outside world. her mind was a whirlwind of conflicting and complicated thoughts she just couldn’t work through.

if he was surprised to find her in the bathroom, he didn’t show it. kylian called her name but there was no response except an occasional small hum. the room felt smaller and the atmosphere was uncomfortable with the big news looming over them.

“cherié, tout va bien?” he asked her softly, eyes filled with worry as he kneeled a bit down and remarked how hers seemed to just stare into nowhere with a numb expression in them. she didn’t find the strength in herself to say her fears out. it was paralyzing her from deeply inside and forming a big lump in her throat that prevented her from being vocal. instead she only handed him the positive test, the two lines glowing dimly under the bathroom light. — honey, is everything okay

there was a confused expression on his face that turned into a mix of shock and slight happiness. but any emotion disappeared when he was met with her expression. “this is a surprise,” he said out loud and turned towards her. “are you happy?” his question hung in the air but she couldn’t find an answer.

“i don’t know. i don’t know what i’m going to do.” she admitted, her voice quiet. there was a certain nervousness and fear that underlined her voice, portraying the weight that she carried on her shoulders now. there were so many possibilities and challenges, so many hills and rocks they would have to climb now. she wished she was fearless like all the other women that were over the moon when they got the positive news.

“i was about to leave for a whole year. the second part of my tour is starting in a month. and now i’m…” her throat became dry as the lump became bigger. the words seemed stuck, as if speaking them out would actually make it real. “i’m pregnant.”

she didn’t have to say more for kylian to understand her. that’s just how they were. he seemed to comprehend that she wasn’t mad at the pregnancy. after all, she adored children. she was amazing with them and they both knew they wanted kids. she just feared the impact it could have on her career.

“je ne sais pas quoi faire,” she mumbled under her breath, her lips barely moving. “it wasn’t supposed to happen now. everything was going soo… well, i guess. i don’t want it to end. i don’t want to lose my career.” — i don’t know what to do

he let out a sigh, his back sliding down the wall as he sat down next to her. one hand still held the positive test while the other wrapped around his girlfriend’s waist, pulling her closer to him. “why would this ruin your career? you’re the most successful artist i know. nothing could ruin this now.”

“you’re supposed to say that. but you haven’t seen that pregnancy does to women. i don’t want my career to be ruined, not with the way the world treats women. how am i supposed to be a good mum and a successful woman in the music industry?” she shook her head and put it down on his shoulder, resting it there. she appreciated his efforts to comfort her but he was a man— they would never truly understand a woman’s suffering, no matter how hard they tried.

“we could stay home both if you want that. i take a break from football and i could be home for the both of you,” he suggested and amara looked at him incredulously. it was strange for her how he had accepted it so quickly already, that they were about to be three while she still struggled to comprehend the situation.

she shook her head firmly. “i could never ask you to stop for me. i know how much you love football. it’s your life. this is a me-problem.”

“une grossese n’est pas un probleme d’une personne. tu n'es pas seule. je te promets que rien ne va se gâcher. ta carrière est remarquable est elle le sera toujours. no matter what you do,” he consoled her, pressing soft kisses on her temple. “je t’aime tellement. mais ça, c’est ta decision et tu es la seule avec le choix. soo… are you happy?” — a pregnancy is not a problem of one person. you’re not alone. i promise you, nothing is going to get ruined. your career is remarkable and will be

— i love you so much. but this is your decision and only you can take it.

she shrugged, the unexpected twist in her plans still burning through her mind. she just couldn’t understand how there was a small human being growing inside her now. something that was breathing inside her. even though it felt unreal — and all at once she knew what she was going to do. what she would have to do now. her world would revolve around that little human being now. and she would do everything in her power to love that little baby that was living inside her. even if it the feeling of surrealism would never truly leave her.

maybe her mind should have adapted to it by now but it still felt disconnected to the situation. as if she was living two lives now. they hadn’t told anyone yet, preferring to keep it their little secret for the moment. especially because they still hadn’t settled in on the idea of getting a family addition.

kylian had noticed her struggles. how she couldn’t work around it. he would find her sometimes in front of the mirror, staring at her stomach. and even then it looked like she still hadn’t made her peace with the situation. amara had come up with several excuses why she had been going softer on training and why she avoided her pr for the second leg of the tour so much at the moment. kylian seemed to have calmed her down a bit about the pregnancy but the fears and rocks it would bring still hadn’t been overcome. even more when she still didn’t feel a thorough connection to the baby in her stomach.

the first ultrasound had been their reality check. that whatever they had been dancing around, was actually happening. there was a grateful look in her eyes when kylian grabbed her hand while their doctor applied the cold gel on her. it was terrifying for her to say the least. their nurse was friendly, nice — she must have sensed amara’s nervousness with the way she had been trying to calm the singer down. it had been risky getting an appointment but kylian had made sure to be extra careful. to make sure that nothing would come out to the press. the least she needed right now was for the time that should’ve been the happiest in her life to be without any media presence.

hearing the heartbeat was a sharp reminder that they weren’t alone anymore. the sound appeared to be precise evidence of life within her, the real confirmation for her pregnancy. it was a new experience for them, a new chapter that was starting soon in their lives. the impending parenthood that was installing its way into their life. several emotions were rushing through them as they made contact for the first time with their baby. and yet, despite the huge importance of the moment, amara’s emotions refused to truly correspond to the situation because of a missing connection between her and the baby.

she looked at the ultrasound screens, her eyes specifically fixing the point the doctor had shown them was their baby. she was registering the moment but struggled to find an emotional place for it. and it wasn’t because amara didn’t love the growing human in her body enough. there was no lack of love or commitment. her brain was just going into panic mode and refused to acknowledge the incoming changes. an automatic self-defense response from her mind who thought it needed to protect her. because even if she knew her career was good, it didn’t take away her fear of having all of that ruined.

as the doctor left them to offer them some privacy, there seemed to be just them now and the sound of a heartbeat. amara didn’t have to look at kylian to know that his cheeks were probably hurting from smiling so much. that his eyes were probably a bit teary from hearing the heartbeat of their unborn child. his hand found hers and he subconsciously intertwined them, his mind still clouded by all the emotions running through his body. she smiled at him, happy to know that at least he seemed to be able to form a special memory with the moment. for her, everything still felt surreal.

and the feeling of it did not leave her, not even in the night.

they were in bed, cuddled together under blankets when amara suddenly woke up from a slight movement. she turned a bit to look at kylian but her boyfriend still seemed to sleep peacefully. as she felt it again, amara looked down and found kylian’s hand on her stomach. casually laying there all protectively. and somehow, it was exactly what she needed to realise that it would be okay.

a small smile formed on her face and she put her hand on her stomach too. this was going to happen and she would be prepared for it. she wasn’t sure whether babies could already hear but it was stronger than her. the urge to promise her baby the world.

“i don’t know whether i’m going to be a good mum to you,” she began softly, speaking low to not wake up kylian. “but i can promise you, you’ll be in good hands with your dad.” she chuckled, the thought of kylian playing with a small mini-him or mini-her exciting her. “i’m sorry that you’re stuck with a mum who doesn’t know what she wants. but i’m trying. i’m trying for you… to be the best version of myself that you’ll need.”

they began slowly, the changes. at first barely remarkable and now they were plainly obvious. life seemed to radiate from her. she possessed a kind of positive aura around her that even the blind could see. she had truly grown into the start of her pregnancy as she entered her second trimester.

amara found herself balancing her life before and during her pregnancy. she had to get used now to the fact that her body was adapting for the small human being in her stomach and that it included good and bad changes. she had overcome her struggles with the pregnancy and the lack of emotion she had had towards it. now she suddenly felt overwhelmed but happy. nearly excited to start this new chapter.

she was four months pregnant and with that also came the first differences that made this pregnancy real. that made it more than just a statement on a paper. a small, noticeable bump had formed on her stomach — it wasn’t very big but remarkably enough that it had made them nearly cry when they had seen it. now kylian’s hoodies had become her go-to attire to hide the small curve on her stomach. his sweatshirts engulfed her completely, serving as a comfortable shield for her womb and a cover up. after all, they still hadn’t told anyone and the little human growing in her body was still their secret.

and just as she progressed into her pregnancy, so did the unfortunate changes like morning sickness or strange food cravings. instead of spending her mornings in bed, spooning with her boyfriend, she now found herself hung over the toilet as soon as the sun came up, with kylian holding her hair. he whispered sweet encouragements and gentle circles which was now a habit for them every morning as she finished her first trimester to enter the second. it was exhausting, crucifying even and drained her. the doctor had told them it would stop soon but she found no change. she would just have to endure it.

even worse were the sudden food cravings. eating had already become hard enough with nothing staying in her body but her strange food cravings made it ten times worse. strawberries were her first sacrifice that came with nurturing life followed by sushi and chinese food. now even the slightest smell of take-out food had her running to the toilet. it was hard and what made it even more hard was the fact that she couldn’t ask anyone for advice other than her doctor.

they hadn’t told anyone of the pregnancy. she had canceled the second leg of her tour without any reason other than the “personal reasons” she had stated in her statement. it had been a heart-wrenching decision, stopping to travel around the world and illuminate people with her music but it was necessary. another sacrifice for her new life she was entering. they had left the world — including their own families — in the dark as they chose to live in their small pink bubble, far away from the harsh reality. amara would never admit it but she was glad. grateful that she didn’t have to share what was supposed to be the happiest time of her life with the world. she wanted it to be their private little moment.

pregnancy did not only change the way they lived. it changed them completely. amara knew kylian loved her but he had changed his love language. he had gone from sweet words and giving gifts to affection and touching her constantly. it had started small, with small caresses on her back and intertwining their hands subconsciously to gentle circles drawn on her hands now soft strokes. and most of them were always centered around her stomach. it was his new way of expressing his unconditional love that was now not only directed towards her but also towards the tiny life growing inside her. they had adapted to parenthood together and it made her fall in love even more.

especially when he talked to their small little miracle when he thought she was asleep. it had started as small confessions towards their baby and had turned into full one-sided conversations now. it warmed her heart when she listened to him, heard how he expressed some of his fears — that amara found were completely unreasonable— and talked about how excited he was. no matter which gender their little bundle of joy would have. only they mattered to them, her, him and the small unborn baby. their bubble was complete.

but the couple knew that their bubble would burst soon and they would rather be the ones to do it than an outsider. after spending one month at home, shielded from the outside, she had decided to come out. and her first official appearance was no other place than kylian’s match. her parents had surprised her with a visit and both knew, they couldn’t hide it any longer now. they hadn’t exactly spoken about a way they would announce it but it was clear that they would have to share it with their families now.

along with her parents she was seated in their usual reserved spots for the families of the players, next to them kylian’s parents and his brother with his children. she played with kylian’s nephew, bouncing him on her lap while her mind wandered off to thinking about how it would be in a few months. when she would be cheering him on with their small bundle of joy.

their eyes met and she watched his smile grow bigger as he spotted her with his nephew — no doubt, the same image of her with their baby was running through his mind. again, there was an overwhelming sense of pride and excitement. amara turned to her mother, who had redirected a question towards her, wondering why her daughter was glowing so positively. and all she could do was grin. they would know later.

though later appeared to be very close as their secrecy came to an end with the opening score. he had hit a beautiful goal after dribbling his way through the penalty area and instead of hitting his usual celebration, he went for the ball. there were shocked gasps around her along with a roar of cheer when he ran around with the ball under his shirt and sent a heart her way. everyone instantly put the pieces together — after all there weren’t many possibilities what it could signify — and immediately they all turned towards her.

“don’t tell me…” her mother trailed off in shock and amara nodded, grinning widely.

“surprise,” she exclaimed, a cheeky smile adorning her face. she lifted the sweatshirt a bit and revealed her four-month old belly that she had been hiding for the past month now.

fayza immediately pulled her into a hug, kissing amara’s temple gently. “félicitation ma fille. oh je suis tellement contente.” — congraulation, my daughter. i’m soo happy

one by one, they hugged her, all expressing their felicitations. even the others that were around to support their player on the pitch threw a happy congratulations towards her.

“how far along are you?” her father asked her, pulling his daughter in for another hug.

she smiled into the hug, the feeling of home spreading through her body. “nearly five months now. i finished my first trimester a few weeks ago.”

“now it makes sense why you couldn’t go out with me,” alice realized and amara sent a wink in her direction.

“how could you keep this from us?” her mother asked in a shocked tone, looking at her daughter incredulously. “amaghị m ma m ga-akụ gị maka idobere m ya ka ọ bụ naanị nwee obi ụtọ. ihe a abughi ihe i zonari nne gi ada.” — i don't know whether i'm supposed to hit you for keeping it from me or just be happy. this is not something you hide from your mother.

amara shrugged. “it was our little secret.”

𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌

amara.imani and k.mbappe

liked by liyah_clark, achrafhakimi and 26.304.752 others

amara.imani secret is finally out. the reason i had to cancel the second leg of my tour. i’ll back soon but in the meantime, baby imani-mbappé is coming

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liyah_clark the audacity to not tell your best friends that we’re becoming aunts

graceywood can’t believe she hid it from us 😔, i think we don’t mean anything to her anymore

amara.imani I APOLOGIZED ALREADY

amara.imani i even told you the gender, what more do you want?

username project mbappe is officially starting

username man really said, i’m starting my own mini-me

psg félicitation a vous deux ❤️💙

equipedefrance félicitation de toute l'équipe de france

username news of the year

antogriezmann félicitation mon frère

sza i can’t waittttt

kipembe3 la bébé de la team va avoir un bébé, trop hâte

paulpogba kyks le daron, qui aurait cru

cynthia_e so excited to become an aunt to this angel

username please say sike

username i don’t wanna lose my (imaginal) wife

username omg now it makes sense why she was always spotted in sweatshirts

kehlani ohh i’m gonna be auntie kehlani soon 🥹

charles_leclerc new member to the amara imani squad

landonorris best news of the week

graceywood auntie grace is ready for her duties

liyah_clark auntie liyah and uncle charles report for duties too

username i’m not even mad anymore she canceled her tour

username fr, i’m too excited for this

achrafhakimi finally. it was so hard keeping it a secret and not telling you i knew

amara.imani how did you know?

achrafhakimi you never decline a glass of red wine

username omg they’re gonna be parents 🥹🥹

tchaga_ felicitations a vous deux. je vous souhaite le meilleur

k.mbappe 🫶🏾

the news had spread like a wildfire and even people who weren’t interested in the football or music industry knew that amara imani was pregnant. their names had been mentioned in every article for three weeks straight, wondering over the gender of the baby and when exactly it could maybe arrive. her phone was now silent everyday to drown out the constant vibrations of notifications. it was spammed with articles and posts mentioning her — everyone had something to say about her pregnancy.

even players she hadn’t ever interacted with had slid into her dms to wish her and kylian well. not to forget the french national team who had called to congratulate them as well. they had instantly launched a group call, to also include those who played overseas and wished their two friends well. everyone bombarded her with questions about the impending arrival of their baby — their new protégé as they liked to call it now. a warm feeling spread through her body as she thought about the way, their baby already had so many uncles that loved their coming bundle and would help them. they were a big family after all.

as she advanced in her pregnancy and her bump grew bigger, kylian also grew more protective around her. he didn’t allow her to lift a finger to do anything around the house anymore except go to pee. he cooked now and send his mother to drop off food when he was busy or away for a game. his chauffeur had now become something like their housekeeper, occasionally checking in on her when she was home alone. kylian had even hired her a personal shopper that would go shopping for her when she didn’t feel like online shopping. he was doing everything to protect her from doing too much.

and amara understood where he was coming from so she couldn’t even be mad at him. after their latest doctor’s appointment, where they had been told that there was a risk of giving birth prematurely, her own fears had reappeared again. they had never truly left her but now they were living in her brain again. her pregnancy had already been complicated with her uterus apparently refusing to grow to give the baby more space. she had been told it was a protective response of her body after a certain kind of trauma she must have endured — a trauma that her body now refused to live again so it took protective measures. she had been ordered two weeks of bed rest and after that, to do the most to go easy on her body. spare it from hard work.

seven months into what should have been the happiest time of her life and she found herself afraid of her own body and what could happen if she gave birth prematurely. she had worked through the fears concerning her career and now she would have to manage the fears of not being ready to give birth.

and adding to that fear that hovered over her now, pregnancy had also become harder for her. what had seemed to be a small curve before now looked like a midsized watermelon shoved into her stomach. the toll on her body became more prominent now — daily ingestions of vitamins, eating twice the amount of what pregnant women usually consumed — measures like that had become routines for her. she had been warned of a complicated pregnancy but none of what she had been told measured up to what she was feeling.

nonetheless, her pregnancy was also marked with good moments, happy moments where both just got ready for parenthood. moments that had put light on the situation they were living in at the moment. painting the room had been a day where they had created lots of memories they cherished. the singer had been visiting friends of hers who had been staying in the city of love and had come home to find kylian with a screwdriver in his hand while achraf was reading him the instructions for the crib.

“you’re supposed to put it like this.”

“i’m doing that. it won’t go in.”

the two hadn’t even noticed her arrival their focus laying purely on the crib. turned out, he had left training early and had dedicated the entire day to constructing the crib and getting the room finished. her heart had grown twice its size that day. there were so many memories they had already created in that room (looking past their messy make-out session because she was feeling horny) and painting the room of their coming bundle of joy was just an addition to that.

the realization of parenthood and their new addition to the family had somehow wriggled into their lives. during her first trimester, she had pushed the thought of pregnancy at the back of her head, hoping to procrastinate everything that concerned it. now she was excited for the arrival of their little bean and was planning each detail as finely as she could. they were navigating their way around it with the new flow of emotions they were experiencing. as she progressed and her bump became bigger, so got the question about the name their unborn child would carry. it was clear to both of them that their baby would not carry a double-name; they held no importance if the only place where they appeared was on official documents. they would settle on a single name their baby would be known through the world.

he had the entire world scream his name and wear it on their shirts to express their support for him, she had people sing her music all over the world and express themselves to it. both names carried big weighs all around the world and no matter which name it got, there would always be expectations that would have to be reached. yet she sensed that it was more important for him — the matter of the name. so they chose mbappé for their last name. but the problem of the forename still linged.

that’s how they found themselves awake in bed at four in the morning with the question of the name preventing them from sleeping (in addition to amara craving for tacos at two in the morning). they were surrounded by baby name books while their phones had websites for baby names open.

“what do we think of kylian mbappe jr?” he proposed jokingly, grinning at her as he stole another of her sweet potato fries.

she rolled her eyes. “of course, why not? and while we’re already at it, why not instantly start project mbappe and put it into the academy instantly after i give birth?”

he held his hands up on surrender. “it was just a suggestion.”

“a stupid one,” a small giggle left her lips as she declines his proposition. she was kind of glad that he wasn’t stressing so much about the pregnancy as much as she was now. one of them needed to be the easy parent and she knew it was just in her nature to be the stricter person.

“what about… malouanne ?” he read out loud from his phone which earned him a pillow thrown his way. “what? it’s a mix of the names marie, louise and anne. fits perfectly if you ask me.”

“as beautiful as the name may sound, do you want our kid to be bullied at school?” amara instantly retorted back, continuing to read in her book to find a name.

that was how they spend the night, searching for names that would fit their little human and create their identity. the question of the name was always a difficult one because somehow nothing seemed to fit. nothing was enough for their baby. they were looking for a name that just screamed their bundle of joy; that upon hearing it would immediately make them think of it.

“should we add a middle name?” he asked her, putting his phone down to look at her. his hand instantly placed itself on her stomach, stroking it gently. “should we give you a middle name,” he asked softly towards the stomach. a smile made its way on his face when he felt a kick at the spot where his hand laid and amara hissed slightly.

“i think we need a middle name,” kylian told her slyly. “our little bean clearly agrees with me.”

“they agrees on everything with you. i swear i have a daddy’s girl in my stomach.”

her boyfriend grinned at her, cradling her stomach. “well, they are their father’s child” his grin widened when he felt a kick again.

she shook her head in disbelief but knew he was right. bidding him goodnight and placing a last small kiss on his lips, she waltzed a bit around to find the perfect position to sleep in. with her belly growing, so did the matter of finding a good position to sleep in but the huge pregnancy pillow that kylian had bought her seemed to help. still it didn’t take away the ordeal of finding the position. she was nearly asleep, her mind already drifting away when kylian finally closed the books and turned off the light. his hand wrapped around her waist to feel closer to her as he got comfortable in bed.

she had nearly missed his suggestion, already dozing off when she heard his voice. it was barely above a whisper but loud enough to hear.

“i think ada would suit her perfectly as a middle name in case it’s a girl. the perfect mix of you. and you said you wanted to honor your mother.”

needless to say that she fell asleep with a smile on her face. one problem less now in what was supposed to be the happiest time of her life.

a sharp pain shot through her body. she had been seated on the couch, excitingly watching kylian play when suddenly all she could focus on was the feeling of agony that spread through her body. she tries to ignore it but it’s stronger than her. her hands immediately go down to hold her bump as she leans forward, pain rushing through her entire body and making it impossible to think. her mind is consumed with the feeling of crucifying agony and she can’t think of anything else.

as quick as it comes, it subsided again and she takes a deep breath, trying to regain her composure— before it starts all over again. her first thoughts are that she’s experiencing preparation labor — the famous braxton hicks, that her doctor had warned her of and that she had been victim to during her seventh month. but this pain felt different. the match had been long forgotten as she found herself on the floor, tears starting to fall down her cheeks. her body felt weak, too heavy for her to carry to even try to sit up. the salty substance of her eyes had already started to stain the white carpet and she was able to taste her tears. her eyes travel around the room, as she looks for her phone and desperation fills her as she sees it on the other side of the room, charging. she tries to get up, to at least manage to crawl to it but another pain prevented her.

her eyes close, too weak to have them open as soft sobs leave her trembling lips. she’s wallowing in pain, hoping that someone will find her; that kylian will come home soon. she had always been afraid of giving birth in bad conditions, especially as she was early and her due date was supposed to be in two weeks. her arms wrapped around her stomach as she tried to comfort herself by whispering sweet encouragements, hoping that they would at least help her calm down a bit. but the pain did not leave her.

she doesn’t know how long she’s suffering in agonizing pain when she suddenly hears the apartment door opening and someone entering. pearls of sweat are running down her forehead as she’s compressed to the floor, her arms hugging her belly close to her. the solitude had amplified her situation, made it worse as fears had taken over her mind; the fear of having to give birth alone. and she couldn’t be mad at kylian. after all, the due date was supposed to be in two weeks and even that was much earlier than expected. she tries to ignore the pain and at least try to lift her head to see who just came in but the waves of pain that stream through her body are stronger. like electric waves rushing through her body and hitting her everywhere.

it’s his driver that gives her a bit of hope again when she hears his voice. he immediately rushed towards her, kneeling down as he took in the scene.

“i don’t… i don’t want to give birth..” she managed to croak out, pain preventing her from speaking clearly. her voice was filled with agony as small sobs left her lips. "je veux kylian.” — i want kylian

there was no hesitation, no time to panic or doubt. she was sobbing as she tried to catch her breath while he swiftly retrieved his phone to dial the emergency services. while his other hand held the phone, the other was softly stroking her back, hoping to transfer some solace to her. a bystander would have interpreted the scene in front of them completely different but right now, it comforted amara. calmed her down knowing she wasn’t going through this alone anymore.

he also called kylian but he soon realized it was of little avail, when his eyes caught the screen where the camera had just zoomed on the french striker. the feeling of desperation now seemed to have caught onto him too as he quickly grabbed amara’s phone to place another urgent call. this time to his brother who had not been selected for the match. their call was not very long, only sharing the most important details. his heart lightened a bit when he saw the sudden substitution of kylian. but the feeling of relief was as quickly gone as it came when his eyes fell on the woman next to him, who seemed to take the pain harder with every second that passed.

staying conscious started to become hard for her. she felt a bit of relief when the medics had finally arrived, instantly carrying her to bring her to the closest hospital. but he was still not there and it freaked her out. she couldn’t give birth alone. not without him. there was chaos around her, several voices as she was rushed into the hospital and yet her brain only focused on one thought: she needed him here. she had been put into a private room to not attire a lot of attention as they were aware of her identity. they had told her she would soon be ready for the next phase of this journey but she didn’t want to start it. not without him so even though her body was killing her, she held onto the pain till he would be there.

they tried to calm her down as her contractions intensified but it was to no avail. she needed him to be there and hold her hand. be her sanctuary to guide her through her fears. every reassurance that was spoken to her didn’t mean anything to her cause they weren’t whispered by his lips. she wanted him and no one else.

kylian had instantly run to the changing rooms to get his things as soon as he had been informed of the news. there was confusion at first, when he suddenly saw his number on the changing boards but the small explanation from his coach was enough to suddenly hug enrique and rush out as quickly as possible.

there was no time to care about any traffic rules. she was more important. they were what mattered now. short messages had been sent to his families to inform them of the situation before he ran into the hospital, looking to support his girlfriend during this important moment. he didn’t care whether he hadn’t parked right or how many speed limits he had crossed, all he wanted was to hold amara’s hand.

from the reception desk he had instantly been taken to her room where he rushed to her and engulfed her into a close hug. he had seen her in so many states before but this was new to him. unknown territory like each time he went to play on an adversary’s side that he had never crossed paths with. his heart hurt as he took in her appearance; her face scrunched together because of the crucifying pain, the sweat pearls that rolled down her face along with her tears and the small sobs that left her trembling lips. amara was truly in pain.

“t’es- tu est la…” she managed to croak out before another sharp flash of pain shot through her, making her scream in agony. — you’re … here

he wiped her tears from her face and pressed a soft kiss onto her cheek, able to taste the salty taste of her tears. his heart broke as he thought about all the time she must have spent here without anyone close to her and in pain. she had always been scared of facing labor alone, just the thought of it made her doubt everything but he had always been able to calm her down. promises had been exchanged when she had longed for the reassurance that no matter what came, he would always be there for her— in this moment. she would never have to go through this alone.

“je suis venu le plus vite possible,” he mumbled, grabbing her hand and squeezing it. hoping that the solace and feeling of warmth the act usually transferred would calm her down a bit. she cried again, this time though she wasn’t sure whether it was due to his presence or the pain that her body had to endure at the moment. — i came as quick as possible

he lifted their intertwined hands to meet his lips and pressed a kiss on it. “je te l’avais promis. je serai là.” — i promised you. i will be there.

she nodded, another contraction hitting her and preventing her from speaking. her body was overwhelmed with emotions; pain, fear. comfort all present in her body. a bit of solace had been found from kylian being there but the feeling disappeared when the doctor came in agan. when she announced that it was showtime and should have to push now. there was no going back, no time to have second thoughts. it was all happening in this instant now.

labor was hard. jolts of pain were shooting through her body in short periods and each time she had to push through them. she didn’t care if the entire hospital heard her screams or whether she was breaking kylian’s entire hand with the amount of force she was squeezing it. she couldn’t see anything except pain. and what her desperate even more was the fact that nothing seemed to change.

the nurses and doctors were telling her that she was doing a fantastic job but she still felt as if she hadn’t even pushed once. as if nothing had changed. no matter how much she pressed.

“you’re doing so well ma belle,” kylian encouraged her as another of her screams pierced through the room. “you’re so close.”

“why doesn’t it feel like this?” she yelled out in pain, tears streaming down her cheeks. she was hot, her forehead was sweaty and her body felt weak. she couldn’t push anymore.

“miss, you’re nearly done. we can already see the head,” their doctor tried to motivate her. “we just need two more big pushes.”

her surroundings drowned out as she gathered all the strength that was left in her body to push. everything around her became blurry, colors, shapes, persons. her mind was too tired to make her sight clear and she had no energy left anymore to try to focus.

“we need one last push,” they called out to her as she nearly broke down on the bed.

“i’m tired, ky,” she cried tiredly. her eyes barely open. she looked desperately at him. “it hurts so much. i can’t do it anymore. i just want this to be over but it hurts so much,” her sobs left her body and his heart ached as he listened to her.

“t’es la femme la plus courageuse que je connais. et je vais pas te mentir, je ne sais pas dans quelle douleur tu es. mais je sais que tu es la seule à pouvoir le faire. bientôt on aura notre bébé dans le main. one last push and it’s over, okay?” their eyes mirrored every emotion present in the room. the fatigue but also the exhaustion. pain but also love: there was everything. — you’re the strongest woman i know. and i won't lie to you, i don’t know what the pain you’re in feels like. but i know you’re the only one who can do it. soon we’ll have our baby in our hands.

amara nodded as she took a deep breath to push again. she’s clutching kylian’s hand with every last remaining strength as he continues to encourage her. the pain she’s feeling now was much higher than what she experienced the last five hours. suddenly she feels everything. as if her senses have been amplified. there was a sharp pain accompanied by an agonizing scream and suddenly there's a new voice in the room.

she’s asked to hold her arms out as kylian’s eyes fill with tears and all of sudden she’s holding her baby. their little girl. the joy of their life they’ve been dying to meet.

her eyes are filled with tears as the realization hit her. all the pain is suddenly forgotten, as if it never existed. now her body’s only consumed with happiness. she’s crying hysterically as her baby continues to let out cries. the sign of life. that everything was going well. she didn’t need to look at him to know that he was crying as well.

every of her muscles is feeling exhausted when they take their new child away to do its first medical care. kylian himself wasn’t one to often feel very emotional but when he had been asked to cut the chord that had connected amara and their bundle of joy for nine months. she’s finally here and he suddenly understood the feeling of surrealism that amara had told him about.

after the first checks had been done, their daughter had been placed into her arms again. and somehow she must have had still some liquid in her body as her eyes began to water again when she truly held her daughter for the first time.

“she doesn’t seem like a faith,” amara whispered, holding her daughter who was covered in a soft, fluffy, pink blanket. she had opened her eyes for the first time and again, a few years left her eyes when she stared into her daughter’s beautiful eyes. they had her eye shape but all she saw looking into them was kylian. she had inherited her father’s eyes. the fact that she could reference to kylian as dad now spread a new kind of warmth through her body.

“no. it kinda feels wrong,” he agreed. as he gently trailed a finger over her delicate face, he couldn’t help but fall more in love with the woman in front of him. he had always known that he would always love her, no matter in which reality they found themselves. and he had fallen in love with every one of her versions. and now he found himself falling for her new role. he had fallen deeply for amara in her role as mom. he couldn’t believe he had ever doubted. she was perfect. “what was the second name we chose again?”

“are you talking about anaïs?”

kylian’s smile grew bigger as he continued to stare at his daughter. he had learned the meaning of infinite love with amara but the term of unconditional love. it was this small human that taught him what it meant. what people were talking about when they talked about loving someone unconditionally. “yeah. i think she looks more like an anaïs.”

and looking at her, amara understood. she had stopped crying and was looking at her, as if she was taking in her new surroundings. she had been removed from the safe comfort of her mother’s womb and had now to get used to the outside. “anaïs-ada mbappe. welcome into the world.”

she pressed a soft kiss to her cheek before turning to look at kylian and both smiled. they had done it.

“t’es prête papa?” she asked him teasingly and motioned for him to step closer. “take off your shirt. it’s your time now.” — are you ready papa

she was tired. exhausted. there was fatigue written all over her face and yet her face still wore a smile as she watched kylian take off his shirt to have his first skin-to-skin with their daughter. he gently took anaïs out of her hands and sat down on the bed next to her.

he had her cradled against his chest, the warmth of his chest spreading was a connection between them. an expression of love sacred to only them. their phones were vibrating but they ignored it. only their little family mattered now. “salut ma princesse,” he whispered to her softly as she wrapped her hand around his finger. “moi, je suis ton papa. et je t’aime tellement.” — hello my princess. i’m your dad. and i love so much.

their tiny miracle was held in his warm embrace as time around them seemed to pause. no one else existed in their bubble that shielded them from reality going on outside. it was only them. and somehow, as they held their daughter in their hands, the idea of parenthood didn’t seem so scary anymore. amara fell happily asleep, knowing that they were going to do this chapter together.

𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌

amara.imani and k.mbappe

liked by achrafhakimi, graceywood and 28.763.541 others

k.mbappe bienvenue au monde anaïs mbappé

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it was their first day at home. and with the first day also came the first night and the first cries.

it still felt so unreal to them how they had left their home as two and had come back with another person. their family addition that represented the proof of their love. putting her down for the first time in her room filled the air with a warm atmosphere. there was so much love around them as she placed anaïs in her bed after putting her to sleep. a small light of the nightlight they had bought cast a yellowish glow around the room, revealing a few of the fine details they had put into the room. their eyes did not leave their daughter, they were too much in awe of what they had created.

she’s woken up by anaïs’ soft cries in the night. a quick glance at the small clock next to the bed told her it was just one in the morning. she’s tired and every bone is begging her to stay in bed but her motherly intuition prevents her. turning, she saw kylian still sleeping profoundly next to her as she gets up to calm down their daughter.

“you’re hungry, aren’t you,” she asked her daughter in a gentle tone as she picked the small baby up and sat down with her on an armchair next to the crib. she thanked kylian’s brilliance for having had the idea of installing one next to the crib. “ça va, maman est là. maman va s’occuper de toi,” she soothed anaïs’ cries as she got ready to feed the little human in her arms. — it’s okay, mummy here. mummy is gonna take care of you

just as she had predicted, hunger had been the cause for her awakening as she watched anais latch onto her breasts, hands grabbing onto each side. her cries quickly subsided as the little girl got fed while amara tenderly stroked her cheek. she waited for a bit longer after making sure anais had burped and rocked her little princess back to sleep before joining her own bed again. she couldn’t even find it in herself to be mad at the way kylian was sleeping so profoundly, as if he hadn’t heard her cries. it was her first time experiencing motherly intuition and tending to her responsibilities. she placed a soft peck on his forehead before falling asleep again, her mind drifting away before she had even truly placed down her head on the pillow.

the second time anais woke up, it was kylian who tended to her needs. amara stirred, ready to get up but the french striker tells her to go back to sleep. that she was already exhausted enough and her body needed some rest. after changing her diaper, he instantly took off his shirt before picking up his daughter and putting her close to his chest. immediately her cries stopped when she felt her father’s warmth and comfort as his fingers gently brushed against her head. they stood in the same position for the next thirty minutes before anais fell asleep again, their small bond blossoming through moments like this. amara’s still heavily asleep when he slips back into bed again, wrapping his arm around her waist to find sleep again.

but his sleep didn't last for very long before they heard her cries again. this time though they had managed to find three more hours to sleep with the clock indicating that it was already eight in the morning. amara was about to get up to look after their daughter when kylian grabbed her hand, motioning for her to stay in bed.

“you went last time,” amara muttered tiredly, already looking for her slippers but kylian shook his head.

“go back to sleep cherie,” he interjected, putting a shirt on. “you need it more than me.”

“your holidays are over tomorrow. if anyone needs sleep it’s you.”

he shrugged, standing up and ready to go look after anais. “and you just gave birth a week ago. repose toi un peu,” he convinced her and she nodded, knowing it was useless to argue with him. she gave him a last kiss before closing her eyes again, fatigue instantly taking over. she didn’t know what had been the matter this time but since her cries quickly stopped at the sight of her father, she knew he had everything under control, her instincts could relax as she slept a bit more. — get some rest

she woke up to an empty bed the next morning. it’s the feeling of coldness next to her that managed to bring her out of her sleep even though she was still tired. she knows that kylian must be around somewhere with anaïs but she enjoyed staying in bed for the first time since she gave birth. regain all her forces.

there was an instant smile on her face when she saw her daughter in kylian’s hands while walking out their bedroom. her heart grew twice its size when spotted them on the sofa with kylian talking to her and anaïs having her eyes wide open. as if she was understanding or at least trying to follow what her father was telling her.

“regarde qui s’est réveillée,” he said softly to his daughter, noticing amara’s presence. “tu as vu maman?” — look who woke up

— did you see mummy?

“vous êtes trop beau ensemble,” she greeted him with a kiss as she sat down next to him and reached for their daughter. anaïs calmly got comfortable in her mother’s arms, not making much of a fuss as she got ready to eat. — you’re too beautiful together

she had a fond smile adorning her lips, looking at her daughter. this tiny human being that changed their lives around. even though she was only a week old, they could already recognize that she was her father’s photocopy. that she would be his except for the shape of her eyes. the one thing anaïs had inherited from her.

“t’es la femme la plus forte que je connais. je ne sais pas comment t’as fait. comment tu fais…,” he told her completely in awe which made amara chuckle. — you’re the strongest woman i know. i don’t know how you did it, how you do it

“et toi tu es l’homme le plus beau, magnifique de toute cette terre. no one i would rather have than you as the father of my baby. — you’re the most beautiful, amazing man on this earth

“she makes everything better,” kylian chuckled as he got up to prepare breakfast for them.

amara nodded, softly cradling her daughter while she breastfed her. her small little hands were placed firmly (as firm as they could be for a one week old) as she drank the breast milk.

“weird how i’m ready to go to war for someone i’ve practically known a week. and yet she’s the answer to everything.”

he understood that feeling better than anyone. if the world turned around him before, now his world turned around her. he was ready climb mountains, cross jungles or put the world on fire if it was necessary for his daughter’s happiness. he would do anything for her. “i love you two more than anything.”

his eyes held that famous sparkle as he spoke and amara leaned in to place a kiss on his lips. in the span of a week their lives had changed and they had been thrown into the world of parenthood. the one thing no matter how much one studied, there was never the perfect preparation. one would never know how parenthood actually worked out till they were parents. it was a new path to life.

amara and kylian had each other to overcome the hills and rocks that may have been put onto their way. anaïs was the confirmation of what they had always been. a family. their bubble was finished and perfect now. they had everything they needed.

taglist: @lorarri @aechii

#kylian mbappe #kylian mbappe x reader #kylian mbappe fluff #kylian mbappe fanfic #mon amour #amara imani #kylian mbappe imagine #kylian mbappé x reader #kylian mbappe fanfiction #kylian mbappe x singer! oc #kylian mbappe x amara imani #kylian mbappe x black! oc #kylian mbappe x black reader #kylian mbappé #kylian mbappé x singer! oc #kylian mbappé x black! oc #kylian mbappé x oc #kylian mbappe one shot #kylian mbappe series

[spacebarbarianweird]

Seeing as we've had so many beautiful body positive Tav fics recently, and you've been piece by piece making me feel better about different parts of myself, can I request big/soft tummied Tav? It's taken me all my life to love my squishy, stretchmarked tum and I feel like after decades of being forced to bring back pretty marks that Astarion would secretly ADORE the comfort a chubby Tav brings 🥹🥹🥹

Ok, this one is going to be a bit self-indulged coz I am also "soft tummied" and have been trying to lose weight for years XD

Masterlist

Headcanons

You aren't particularly fat or overweight - but you are pretty curvy for a half-elf.

If you were raised by humans, it wouldn't probably bother you.

But you were born among elves and raised as one of them, in their culture and their faith.

Your mother almost died at childbirth (a half-elf pregnancy is often a death sentence for an elven woman), and your appearance was often mocked.

Too tall, too curvy, ugly protruding ears that look like they've been burnt and mutilated.

You left your home at the age of 25, looking for a place to belong.

Unfortunately, half-elves are not welcome anywhere, and the only chance to live a normal life is to disappear into the melting pot of the cities of the Sword Coast.

It is still difficult for you since you have a lot of insecurities due to your appearance.

You think no one would even want to love you and sleep with you.

So, Astarion's sweet words make you cautious.

You suspect he wants something from you, but you let your guard down.

Dating Astarion boosts your self-esteem.

He makes you feel wanted and desired.

In his eyes, you are the most gorgeous person in the world.

Maybe the fault is your blood or the fact you are the first person, who treats him well.

But he means it when he says you are beautiful.

Astarion loves sleeping with his head on your stomach. It feels like a pillow to him.

Or hugging your thighs when you cuddle.

A bigger body comes with bigger breasts, which Astarion can't get enough of.

As his vampiric strength return, he can easily carry you around as if you were weightless.

His compliments aren't fake - he loves you and your body.

You are an incredible source of warmth and softness for him and he won't trade it for anything.

--

Tag list

@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati @lynnlovesthestars @marina-and-the-memes @waking-electric @ayselluna @connorsui @asterordinary @darkarchangel96 @locallegume @brainfullofhotsauce @coffeeanddonutscafe @my-queen-rhaenyra-targaryen @queenofthespacesquids

#spacebarbarian headcanon #astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 astarion #astarion romance #bg3 #astarion bg3 #astarion headcanon #baldurs gate 3 #astarion headcanons #astarion x tav #astarion x f!tav #tav x astarion #astarion x reader #astarion and tav #astarion x you #baldur's gate tav #baldurs gate 3 astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion baldurs gate #astarion brainrot #astarion baldurs gate 3 #half elf tav #bigger tav

[m-jelly]

How do you think Levi would treat s/o who’s insecure about her body from being pregnant? Im not sure if you have one like this already :)

Levi sees you as the MOST beautiful woman in the world. He understands how demanding pregnancy and childbirth are on the body, as well as how long it takes to recover afterwards. He thinks that you are absolutely incredible at creating life inside of you, a sweet and adorable life made from pure love.

Levi would talk you up so much and tell you just how perfect you are. If you are worried about the weight gain, he would tell you it's all for the baby. If you still keep a bit of weight after the baby, he will tell you that you are sexy. If you want to lose it, he will go to the gym with you and will be your trainer (which is really distracting because he gets very touchy and turned on)

If you have stretch marks, he will trace them often with his finger and tongue. He will kiss them a lot and say how they are proof that you are a strong and sexy woman. If you want special cream to get rid of them, he will rub the cream into them and will be a bit sad to see them go because he adores how shiny they are.

He would also tell you that other people can mind their own fucking business about your body. If people judge you at all for your body, he will tell them where to shove it. He will tell you that other people's opinions shouldn't judge how you look. He fell madly in love with you for the body you have and he has fallen even deeper in love for now having a body that has created precious life.

Levi will tell you just how much he loves you and your body. He will be your own personal cheerleader when you dress up or wear little clothes. He will call you sexy and compliment every single part of you. If your body changes a bit, he'll get excited because he gets to explore your body and find new wonderful things about it.

#levi ackerman #levi #aot levi #snk levi #levi x you #levi x y/n #levi x reader #levi headcanons #levi ackerman headcanons #levi ackerman hc #levi ackerman x female reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman x y/n smut #jelly fanfics

[urchintoast]

Fear

Pairing: Anthony Bridgerton x (Female) Reader

Rating: T

Length: 800 words

Warnings: angst, blood mention, difficult childbirth, talk of death

Summary: Anthony’s always been afraid of dying and leaving behind his family like his father did.

————

The fear still paralyzed him, sometimes.

[[MORE]]

He didn’t go for walks in the garden, and always inspected the carriage personally before getting in.

He’d thought, once, that his worries would ease once they had children. That perhaps if he knew that you wouldn’t be left alone, that finally the weight would ease off his chest. The moment baby Edmund opened his eyes and stared up at him though, the weight doubled, and he knew he would never be free of this fear. Because now he’d be leaving even more behind.

He wasn’t afraid of death. Not really. Or at least, not in the traditional sense. He wasn’t afraid of what might happen to himself when he left this mortal world. His sins were his own, and he was fully prepared to answer for them one day.

He was afraid of what came with death. Of the effect that his death would have on everyone still living. His greatest pride was also his greatest source of anxiety - his love for you. It was his own selfishness of not being able to let you go, of ensnaring you into his life, into his heart, that kept him awake at night. Usually it was just to watch how peaceful you looked. To soak in every moment he could like this before he wound up wrecking you, leaving you behind to pick up the pieces like his father did to his mother, to all of them. He knew his death was inevitable, and he hated himself for it. For letting you in enough that you returned his love completely, and were now vulnerable to losing him.

What he never expected was that the very opposite would happen. Never once had it even crossed his mind as a possibility that you would leave this earth before him.

“It’s a girl,” his mother told him softly, tiredly.

“And Y/n? How is she doing?” He asked, eager to see his wonderful wife and tell her how proud he was of her. How much he loved her. To see her hold her mini lookalike and together introduce their daughter to her older brother. His whole world.

At his mother’s silence, however, he looked up, alarmed. “Mother? How is Y/n?”

“She lost a lot of blood, Anthony. The doctor’s doing everything he can, but you must prepare yourself. There is a chance that she’ll never regain consciousness.”

Everything after that passed in a blur.

Benedict and Colin quickly rushed to his side, holding him up. His head felt like cotton, and the room spun around him. He heard shouting echoing in the hallway, but couldn’t tell if it was himself or someone else. Only the fact that he couldn’t breathe gave hint that the commotion was caused by someone else.

Ages passed—Anthony never knew if it was mere minutes or hours, and then a hush fell upon the whole household. Even the newborn babe was quiet, as if she sensed that this was an important moment that could make or break everything.

When the door to the bedroom opened again and his mother stepped out with her head down, his heart stopped. He dropped his head, unable to watch his mother’s approach and the news it must bring.

“She looks just like her mother,” Violet said, then, and Anthony’s eyes widened at that. There, in his mother’s arms, was the tiniest girl imaginable. Despite everything else, Anthony reached his arms out to hold her. His daughter. Carefully, he ran a finger over her cheek and under her chin. She truly did look just like her mother. Like Y/n.

He wasn’t even aware of the tears that were falling down his face, though his mother quickly commandeered Benedict’s handkerchief to wipe them away for him.

“Colin, will you go fetch Neddy? Come along, Anthony, I think your wife has waited long enough to have her family in her arms again.”

His head shot up at that.

“What? You mean-!” his voice broke as another sob shook his body.

“Oh, thank god!” Benedict said quietly, wiping away tears of his own.

As he walked into the bedroom carrying your daughter, Anthony froze upon seeing you sitting up in bed, before rushing forward. Just behind him, Colin carried Neddy over and deposited him on the bed next to you before stepping back to give the family some room.

Anthony’s quite sure that he wasn’t saying anything at all coherent, too caught up in the fact that you were here, you were still here. What he said didn’t matter, just that you were the one to hear it. The fear of death and all that came with it had not won today.

Death may be inevitable, but it didn’t have to be today. That, at least, he could live with.

#anthony bridgerton x reader #bridgerton fanfiction #anthony bridgerton fanfiction

[tigertales9]

More Than Anything II

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader

Warnings: 18+ / Angst / Body image issues due to pregnancy / Smut

Description: This is part 2 of More Than Anything

A/N: I was hoping to get this up a couple days ago but got stuck tweaking a few bits. I'm still not completely happy with it, but that's the story of my life. Hope y'all like it.

-----------------------

~ ~ Friday afternoon just after Joe leaves ~ ~

You eventually slide off the barstool, grabbing your phone to shut the video down before guzzling your entire glass of water. "Thirsty as hell," you grumble, walking to the fridge to refill your glass. It's no wonder, you think, taking a couple of gulps of the cold water while heading for the stairs. I'm super dehydrated from all the crying and throwing up.

You walk into the master bedroom and flick the ceiling fan on, setting your phone and drink on the bedside table before crawling into bed; as you try to get comfortable you hear a distinct voice in your head.

You overreacted like crazy. You know that, right?

"Fuck off, Cool Logic," you mutter to yourself, using the name you'd given to one of the two dueling voices that had been going at it in your brain for the last couple of months. The dueling voices are as follows -- you have your pre-pregnancy voice providing cool logic, while your hormonal third trimester voice comes crashing in like a wrecking ball.

Cool Logic = Girl please, it's just porn. Not like you caught him balls deep in another woman.

Wrecking Ball = Fuck that! You're huge and chronically uncomfortable since you're carrying HIS child! The least he can do is not be dumb enough to get caught ogling random vag!

"Enough," you mutter, shaking your head and humming a bit to drown out the annoying inner dialogue. You take a deep breath and fight back tears as your mind continues to torture you. What hurts the most is he knows you feel bad about yourself; you've been super honest about it, and he's done nothing but reassure you that he finds you absolutely gorgeous and sexy. "And I stupidly believed him," you mumble.

He hasn't been able to keep his hands -- among other things -- off of you, Cool Logic interjects. Maybe he's telling the truth.

"Shut up!" you snap, more than a little appalled that you're arguing with your damn self. "I'm losing it," you grumble, squeezing your eyes closed as images from the day before flash in your mind

~ ~ flashback to yesterday ~ ~

Joe gets home from the gym just as you're finishing up a light treadmill workout. You hear the garage door open and check your time. "Four minutes left," you grumble before stabbing the 'stop' button. "Close enough." You sit on a weight bench and tug your shoes and socks off, wiggling your toes and grimacing as Joe walks into the room.

"Hey," he chirps, leaning down to give you a quick kiss. "Looking good, mama."

"Looking like the Goodyear blimp," you snort, irrationally aggravated that Joe looks like walking sex, as usual. "If men had to go through pregnancy and childbirth, the human species would've long since gone extinct."

"No doubt about that," he agrees, giving you a playful wink when you narrow your eyes at him. "I think you're sexy as hell," he murmurs, leaning down to give you a more thorough kiss before stepping back.

You really want to call him a liar, but the earnest look on his face stops you cold. You give him a weak smile before heaving a sigh. "I should've got a pedi a couple days ago when I got a bikini wax," you grump, peering at your less than perfect pedicure like it's the worst thing ever. "If I wasn't so huge I'd paint them myself, but here we are," you mutter, gesturing at your pregnant belly.

"Let me do it," he urges giving you a wicked grin when you hit him with an incredulous look. "You know I'm good with my hands," he brags, wiggling his agile fingers and chuckling when you roll your eyes.

"Maybe later," you mumble. "Right now you can put those hands to good use by emptying the dishwasher."

"Yes, ma'am." He gives your ass a playful squeeze as you walk out of the room and head for the stairs. Halfway up you remember another chore that needs to be done. "When you're finished with the dishes can you grab the clean laundry out of the dryer and bring it upstairs? I'll fold it when I get out of the shower."

"You got it, babe," he grins, giving you a thumbs-up before getting to work.

You walk out of the bathroom 25 minutes later, smiling at the array of neatly folded clothes laying on the bed. He grabs a stack of clean towels, handing them to you before reaching for a pile of t-shirts, socks and undies. "Let's put these up then I'll paint your toenails," he offers.

"You don't have to," you mutter, sticking your bottom lip out in an exaggerated pout. "I'll just go to brunch tomorrow with a busted pedi. The girls won't judge me."

Joe leans down and sucks your pouty lip into his mouth, nibbling on it for a second before releasing it. "You're not going to brunch with a busted pedi. Put those towels up and grab everything we need to handle business."

"Yes, sir," you say in a sultry tone, giving Joe an innocent smile when he hits you with a loaded look. You place the towels in a cabinet and grab a bottle of nail polish and toe separators. "I don't need full-service," you say, waggling the bottle of nail polish as you walk back in the bedroom. "Just paint over the existing polish and we'll call it good."

Joe gives you a sly grin as you sit on the edge of the bed. "I was kind of hoping you'd want full-service," he winks, voice heavy with innuendo.

"Maybe later, horndog," you giggle, smiling as he sits cross-legged on the floor at your feet. "Wait a sec," you say, "we need something to put over the carpet just in case."

He pulls his black t-shirt off and spreads it on the floor inside out. "This thing is old as hell. I don't care if it gets polish on it."

You let your eyes wander over his bare skin, admiring the way his muscles flex as he scoots closer to you. "Who's the horndog now?" he grins, easily noticing your not-so-subtle ogling.

"Pretty sure it's still you," you chuckle, handing him the toe separators while shaking the polish bottle.

"You know me too well," he sighs, fixing the separators in place before reaching for the bottle. "Put one foot on my leg," he continues, patting his thigh and watching closely as you do as ordered. "What are you wearing under the t-shirt?" he asks, slowly unscrewing the polish while holding your gaze.

You look down at the light purple t-shirt you're wearing -- his shirt -- before answering. "Panties."

He gives you a look before painting a stripe of coral-colored polish onto a big toe. "What kind of panties?"

"Hipster panties."

"What color?"

"You wanna see 'em?"

"Obvs."

You pull the shirt up just enough to expose the tiny, low rise undies.

"Purple tiger stripes," he nods his approval. "Very nice."

"You picked them out," you giggle, dropping the shirt to cover your crotch as he finishes up foot #1.

"I know. I have good taste." He gives you a wink that's more naughty than playful, lifting your foot up to blow on the wet polish, his gaze sliding up the length of your leg as he continues to blow.

"You trying to get another eyeful?" you tease, a pulse of arousal setting off deep inside as his gaze moves from the juncture of your thighs, over the swell of your belly to linger on your breasts. Your nipples harden under his heated gaze, and his sinful lips curl up in a cocky grin.

"Maybe." He slowly licks his lips while setting your foot down and reaching for your other foot. He wraps his hand around your ankle and lifts your foot all the way up to his mouth, planting a kiss on your sensitive sole before giving it a quick lick.

"That tickles!" you gasp, squirming a bit as he does it again. "Joseph, stop!" you laugh, trying and failing to pull your foot out of his strong grasp.

"Take your shirt off," he orders.

"You don't wanna see my huge belly," you grimace.

"Your belly is sexy," he states. "I wanna see it and your gorgeous tits."

"I don't feel very sexy," you pout.

"Your hard nipples say otherwise."

"I mean, yeah, I'm a little turned on, but I don't feel sexy. I feel big as a house."

"You look like a goddess," he purrs, dropping a full-lipped kiss on the inside of your ankle just above where his hand is gripping you. "Ripe and luscious," he continues, kissing his way up the inside of your calf all the way to your knee. "Good enough to eat," he groans, sucking a mouthful of thigh hard enough to leave a love bite.

You swallow hard and try to act unaffected, knowing it'll drive him crazy. "Are you gonna finish painting my nails?" you ask, sounding more breathless than bratty.

"Take your shirt off," he repeats.

"Finish my pedi first."

He shakes his head no and you raise an eyebrow. "What if I don't take it off?" you whisper, liquid heat pooling in your core at the thought of him tickling you into submission.

"I guess I'll have to punish you," he smirks, raising your foot back up to his mouth.

"Don't you dare!" you holler, squealing when he licks a long stripe up the center of your sole. "Okay, damnit!" you wheeze, whipping the shirt off before he can lick your ticklish foot again.

"Good girl," he purrs, his eyes roaming over the swell of your belly several times before resting on your bare breasts. "Are you wet for me?" he asks, sucking on his bottom lip in a way that causes your clit to throb.

"Nope," you lie.

"Oh really?" he scoffs, one jaunty eyebrow arching upward while his hand slides up your inner thigh. "Lemme check," he purrs, giving you a knowing smile when you grab his wrist.

"Wait." You stop his hand just before it reaches your crotch. You look down at his stupidly sexy smirk and are hit with a bit of inspiration. It takes everything you have not to cackle like a supervillain as the plan takes shape in your mind. You clear your throat and give him a pleading look. "Listen," you whisper, biting your lip when he leans closer to hear you better. "I'll do whatever you want, but you have to finish my toes first."

"Okay," he quickly agrees.

"Just to clarify," you state. "You have to finish my pedi no matter what. You can't stop until you're done, got it?"

He narrows his eyes as he searches your face. "What if the house catches on fire?"

"If the damn house catches on fire you can stop. Anything else needs my permission."

"Ohhhh, a power play. I like it." He gives you a nod of approval. "I accept your terms."

"Good." You release his hand and hook your thumbs in the waistband of your panties, wiggling out of them while his eyes avidly follow their downward progress. "It'll be easier to take these off before both sets of toes have wet polish," you murmur, grinning as he takes over, carefully easing the panties off so as not to disturb your freshly-painted toes.

You lean back on your elbows and spread your thighs a bit, fighting the urge to giggle at the look on his face.

"This seems kinda unfair," he mumbles.

You pretend not to hear his complaint as you lift your right foot and place it on his thigh, giving him an innocent smile when he finally drags his gaze from your crotch. "Only five more toes to go," you grin. "That won't take long at all." He grabs the bottle of polish and leans down to get started; you lay flat on your back and slide your right hand down to rest on your upper thigh. "You painting my nails is kinda hot," you breathe, squirming your hips a little as you inch your hand closer to your crotch. "We should do it more often."

"Yep," he croaks, going completely still as you ghost your fingertips over your slit, slowly sliding up to rub your clit. "I can finish your toes later," he states.

"Nope. That goes against the terms of our agreement." You continue to play with yourself while he paints another toe, muttering under his breath the entire time. You can't see a damn thing because of your belly, but you know he's enjoying the view; you bite your lip and slide a finger inside, your core clenching at his low-throated groan. You feel him grab your wrist and give it a tug before sucking your wet finger into his mouth.

"Are you done with the pedi?" you ask.

"Noooo," he moans.

"I don't smell smoke," you tease, "pretty sure the house isn't on fire."

He releases your wrist, grumbling as he quickly snatches the bottle of polish and goes back to work.

You slide your finger back inside your slick heat, pumping slowly before adding a second finger. A few heartbeats later you feel his tongue on your clit.

"Did you finish . . ."

"Yes!" he growls against your sensitive flesh, sending a shiver of pleasure down your spine.

"I hate that I can't see you because of my belly," you gripe.

"Can you feel me," he asks, giving your clit a loud suck while sliding two fingers inside.

"Y … yeah," you whimper, gasping when he curls his fingers to hit your sweet spot. Just a few minutes later you're already falling over the edge, moaning his name as he continues to pleasure you through your climax.

After you catch your breath, you hold both hands out toward Joe. "Help me sit up, please," you ask. Once you're upright, you look down at him on the ground between your thighs, his lips glistening with your essence. "Are you hard?" you whisper, smiling when he gives you a 'girl please' look before he stands up and shoves his slinky shorts and underwear down to mid-thigh; his cock springs free and you wrap a hand around it, giving a couple of slow pumps before locking eyes with him. You run your tongue up a prominent vein before gently lapping up the precum on his tip. "No time for teasing, baby, I'm too close," he groans, looking down at you through those long eyelashes as you get down to business.

The next few minutes you work him in all the ways you know he loves, relishing in his grunts and moans of approval as you take him deep, tears sliding down your cheeks as you choke on his thick cock. "Shit, baby, I'm close," he warns, reaching a long arm out to steady himself against the bed as his climax hits; you continue to work him through his climax, smacking your lips when he collapses on the bed beside you.

After a few minutes of heavy breathing he gives you a sheepish smile. "I'm gonna need to redo those last two toes," he admits.

You look down at your right foot, mouth dropping open at the absolute mess. "What the hell?" you laugh, shaking your head while giving Joe a bemused look.

"Sorry," he chuckles. "I had a hard time concentrating since you were putting on quite a show."

"That was the point."

"I know. You won."

"What's my prize?" you ask cheekily.

"I'm gonna make you cum again," he states matter-of-factly. "That last one was way too quick."

You watch as he hops off the bed and heads into the bathroom, your pulse rate picking up in anticipation. He strides back into the bedroom and drops to his knees between your thighs. He holds a hand mirror out and you take it. "Lay back," he orders.

"What's this for?" you ask, waggling the mirror while doing his bidding.

"So you can watch," he purrs, giving you a feral smile before lowering his head

~ ~ end of flashback ~ ~

What seemed so hot in that moment is now something you wish you could forget. You stare at the ceiling, cringing in embarrassment at the thought of him seeing you like that.

Right? Wrecking Ball quips. Surprised he could get it up with that gigantic belly staring him in the face. You squeeze your eyes closed as a tear slides down your cheek. Don't listen to that nonsense, Cool Logic snipes. He had no problem getting it up. Hell, he damn near came before you got it in your mouth! Not to mention he went back for seconds!

"Maybe if I ignore the voices they'll go away," you mumble, rolling onto your side to get more comfortable; you grab a pillow and pull it toward you, the faint scent causing your stomach to lurch. It was Joe's scent -- clean and a little musky -- basically your fav scent in the entire world until right this second. You push the pillow away as hot tears stream down your cheeks. What feels like an eternity later you finally drift off to sleep.

A couple hours later you jolt awake, wondering what woke you up for a second before you realize it's your phone; you grab it and check the display -- Joe's mom is calling. You take a deep breath and answer the call. "Hey Robin," you croak.

"Hey sweetie. How are you doing?"

"Okay."

"Good. Listen, Joe told us what happened. We totally understand why you need some space from him for a bit."

"What did he tell you?"

"He said you came home a little early from your brunch and caught him looking at some gross porn. He had an excuse for it but I told him none of that matters."

"I can't believe he told you the truth."

"Well, he feels horrible as he should. How are you?"

You heave a sigh before answering. "I bounce back and forth between being mad as hell and feeling like i overreacted. He didn't mean to hurt me, so I know I should just let it go."

"You didn't overreact," Robin states. "Listen, if you accidentally step on someone's foot, it doesn't hurt any less just because you didn't mean to do it. Same principle here. He didn't mean to hurt you but he did. You're having to deal with negative emotions at a really vulnerable time because of something he did. Don't rush yourself to forgive and forget before you're ready."

"Thank you," you sniff, fighting the urge to cry.

"You're welcome. Joe said your mom is flying in tonight so I know you'll get plenty of love and validation from her. Just know that Jimmy and I are also on your side. Joe is our baby, but we hold him accountable when he does dumb things."

"Thank you," you repeat, hurrying to get off the phone before you break down in tears.

You ease out of bed and head downstairs, pacing around for what seems like ages until your mom pulls into the driveway; you hit the garage door opener so she can pull in, immediately breaking down in sobs when she hops out of her rental car and rushes toward you.

"It's okay," she soothes, holding you tight and rocking back and forth while you sniffle and snort.

"I'm being dumb," you croak.

"No you're not," she states. "You're being human."

You lean back and give her a weak smile. "A dumb human," you laugh, smiling as she grabs her bag and ushers you into the house.

~ ~ Saturday ~ ~

You lie in bed most of the day, switching back and forth between feeling like you overreacted and feeling like you never want Joe to touch you again.

Your mom was great, as expected. Giving you space to sulk while also plying you with yummy food she knew you couldn't resist.

~ ~ Sunday ~ ~

You've been lying in bed all day again, fully embracing the pity-party vibe when your mom strolls into your room just before dinner time. She sits on the edge of your bed and gives you an enigmatic look. "You ready to talk to him?" she asks, giving you a sympathetic smile when you make a stank face. "Listen," she continues, "let me call him. I'll put him on speaker. Maybe hearing his voice will make you want to talk to him. Or not," she shrugs.

You consider it for a minute before responding. "Okay," you sigh, sitting up while she calls him. The sound of his voice hits you like an electric shock; after regaining your composure you shake your head and tune back in to the conversation.

"I'm doing okay, I guess," Joe says. "How's y/n?"

"She's doing … okay," your mom mutters. "I think she's feeling a little better."

Joe heaves a sigh before speaking. "I can't believe I messed things up so bad. The entire pregnancy has been this magical time for us and I screwed it up by being stupid! I ruined everything and now she hates me," he grits out, self-loathing dripping from every word.

"I don't hate you," you state, a little disconcerted at the strangled noise he makes. Your mom hands you the phone and walks out of the room to give you some privacy. "You were on speaker," you continue. "I should have warned …"

"It's okay," he blurts. "You're not mad at me anymore?"

You take a deep breath. "My feelings are still hurt, but I'm not mad. I guess that's a step in the right direction."

"Yeah." The silence stretches out for a minute before he breaks it. "I'm so sorry I hurt your feelings."

"I know. -- If you want to come to the doctor with me tomorrow, you need to be home by 9:15 a.m."

"Thank you," he murmurs. "Can I come home tonight?" he asks. "It's fine if you say no. I don't mean to be pushy."

"It's kind of late."

"I can't sleep anyway. If I leave now I'll be home around 10:00. You don't have to wait up for me."

"I can't sleep either," you sigh. "Listen, I'm not ready for you to touch me or see me naked."

There's several beats of silence before he responds. "I understand."

"Good. Be careful, okay? Don't speed."

"Okay. See you in a couple hours."

You end the call and walk downstairs, sitting on the sofa beside your mom. "He's coming home tonight. He'll be here by 10:00."

"Is he taking you to the doctor tomorrow?"

"Yeah." You rub your belly as you continue. "This is his baby, too. He deserves to be there when we get the news. 99% chance we'll be scheduling a C-section."

"Probably," your mom agrees, "but everything's gonna be fine," she soothes. "You're young, healthy and you have a great doctor." You nod your head then frown as she mentions booking herself a flight back to Dallas.

"When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning. I'll need to head to the airport around 8:30 if I book the early flight. Is that okay?"

"Yeah." You give her a sheepish smile. "Sorry you had to come babysit me for a few days since I threw a hissy fit."

"You had every right to those feelings. Don't feel a bit bad about it."

After eating dinner and watching TV together for a while, your mom heads off to bed and you go upstairs to take a shower. Once you towel yourself dry you study your reflection in the mirror, wishing you could hit rewind and go back to the loving, teasing vibe you had with Joe before the shit hit the fan.

He was absolutely right when he said the whole pregnancy had been a magical time for y'all. You were both pleasantly surprised when your high libido didn't dip at all, but the further along you got, the more self-conscious you got over your growing belly. Joe hadn't seemed to lose any attraction at all which did wonders for your self-confidence.

But now you know he was lying, Wrecking Ball sneers. His ass doesn't deserve to see you naked again until you're completely comfortable with it. Baby boy might be eating solid food by then.

He wasn't lying! Cool Logic argues. That porn he searched for is the exact same thing you did to get him worked up.

"I'm truly losing my shit," you mutter, pulling on a pair of boyshorts and a voluminous maternity tee before walking into the bedroom; you sit in the rocking chair Joe bought for you, looking around at the makeshift nursery y'all had set up in the sitting area of your oversized bedroom: a crib, changing table, diaper genie, small dresser & rocking chair. Jace will eventually have his own room just down the hall, but you and Joe couldn't stand the thought of sleeping in a completely different room away from your baby boy for the first few months.

After a few more minutes just rocking and trying to clear your mind, you hear the faint mechanical hum of the automatic garage door opener signaling the arrival of Joe. A few minutes after that he sticks his head in the bedroom door, smiling when he sees you in the rocking chair. "Hey," he whispers, hovering in the doorway.

"Hey. Come in," you beckon, your heart hurting when you take in the dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep. You know you don't look any better.

"How do you feel?" he asks.

"Remember that gigantic prize-winning watermelon at the county fair last summer? I feel like I swallowed it."

"That bad, huh?"

"Pretty bad. -- How was your drive? You made good time."

"Traffic was light."

"And you were speeding."

"Maybe a little," he shrugs, giving you a tired grin as he walks toward you and drops to the floor at your feet, sitting cross-legged. He clears his throat and lifts his gaze to yours. "Remember when we first met?"

The question catches you off guard. "Yeah," you answer, trying to read his expression.

"I thought you'd never agree to go out with me," he mutters, "but then you finally did and we've been inseparable ever since."

You're still not sure where he's going with this, so you just smile as your mind wanders back to your sophomore year at LSU.

There had been a buzz on campus about the new transfer QB from Ohio State; one of your good friends was a cheerleader so you'd been to several parties where Joe was present. You'd avoided him like the plague since you figured he was a raging fuck boy. He was persistent as hell, you had to give him that. You shot him down at least a dozen times before you finally agreed to go get ice cream with him. The rest was history.

Joe clearing his throat pulls you back into the moment. He takes a deep breath before speaking. "I, ummm, I've been wondering if you wish you had more … experiences before we got together."

"Experiences?" you echo, furrowing your brow while he looks distinctly uncomfortable. "What do you mean?"

He chews on his bottom lip and runs a hand through his unruly curls. "I'm your first and only lover. Maybe you wonder what it would be like with another man."

You stare at him for several seconds before responding. "What have you been smoking?" you chuckle. "I know you're not serious." You shake your head in disbelief while he fidgets with his thumbnail, the look on his face telling you he's dead serious. "Where did this come from?" you ask.

He mumbles something under his breath while staring at the floor.

"I didn't catch that."

He heaves a sigh and repeats himself loud enough for you to hear. "It's just … that video dude got me thinking you might want another man."

"Video dude?"

"You know," he mumbles, mimicking jacking off.

"You've got to be kidding," you mutter, shaking your head when he gives a shrug. "Let me get this straight. You think I'm thirsting for random dick because I pulled a petty stunt to give you a little taste of your own medicine?"

"Something like that."

"I turned that video off the second you walked out the door," you admit. He shrugs again and continues to stare at the floor. "Look at me, please." You wait for him to comply before continuing. "I don't want another man. Not now. Not ever. Okay?"

"Guess I shouldn't have spent the entire week-end worrying about it," he grumbles.

"Guess not," you state. "So should I be worried that you want other women?"

"Of course not," he scoffs, looking completely offended at the question.

"I mean, this whole thing started because I caught you …"

"I was trying to find someone who looks like you," he butts in. "I know you don't believe me, but that's the absolute truth."

"Let's leave that in the past," you mutter. "But since you brought up being my first, I have to admit I've always been a little insecure about it. Can't help but wonder if I'm as good as other girls you've been with who were more experienced."

"You're by far the best. If it was any better I'd have a stroke." You chew on your lip as he continues. "There's literally no way the sex could get any better. We're made for each other." He scoots closer and locks eyes with you, his expression as passionate as his words. "We're compatible on every single wavelength: mentally, emotionally, intellectually, physically, chemically. I always thought the whole pheromone thing was total bullshit until I met you."

You give him a smile as he plows ahead, heartfelt words spilling from his pretty lips.

"You've been the one consistently amazing thing in my life, always there for me at my highest of highs and lowest of lows. I love you more than anything, but I don't think I've done a very good job of showing it. I hope you'll give me another chance to prove it."

You can tell that last part was completely rehearsed, but somehow that makes it sweeter. "You've done a good job of showing it, Joe. This one setback doesn't erase all of that. I just need a little more time to get over it. As long as you don't try to rush me we'll be fine."

"I'll do whatever you want."

"Right now I want to get some rest." You ease out of the rocking chair and head for the bed, sliding between the cool, clean sheets while he watches, clearly not sure what to do. "You can sleep with me, but I don't want to be touched," you state, pretending not to notice the disappointment on his face. "Okay," he sighs, obviously dying to say something else but biting his lip before walking into the bathroom to brush his teeth and undress. He eventually comes out and clicks off the bedside lamp before crawling into bed. "Goodnight," he whispers. "Night," you answer,

You wake up the next morning to the smell of breakfast cooking. Mom's up early, you think, stretching before turning to look at Joe; his side of the bed is empty and you laugh to yourself. "Nothing gets that man out of bed faster than the smell of yummy food cooking."

You pee, wash your face and put your long, wavy hair in a high ponytail before making your way downstairs, surprised to see Joe standing at the stove. "Smells good," you sigh, smiling when he throws you a quick look over his shoulder as you slide onto a barstool.

"Scrambled eggs, turkey sausage and multi-grain toast," he says, dishing food onto a plate and setting it in front of you. He quickly grabs the raspberry jam out of the fridge, giving you a smile as he sets it down. "Thank you. All of my favs," you say, returning his smile while you slather jam on your toast. He watches you tuck into the hearty breakfast, his gaze going a bit feral as you suck a dab of jam off of a finger. You both freeze in that moment, neither of you breathing for a second until the spell is broken by your mom walking into the kitchen.

The rest of the morning flashes by in a blur. Your mom has a quick breakfast before heading to the airport; you and Joe finish breakfast and get dressed before heading to your doctor appointment.

A couple hours later y'all are heading back home from the doctor; as Joe pulls out of the parking lot he instinctively reaches a hand over to rest on your leg, catching himself just before he makes contact. He awkwardly rests his hand on the center console instead, his eyes going wide when you grab his hand and place it on your thigh, smiling at him when he shoots you a quick look.

Once y'all arrive home, you're both subdued by the news you received. You can tell Joe is trying to think of something soothing to say when his phone chirps; he makes a face when he reads the text.

"What is it?"

"Nothing," he shrugs. "Sam wants me to go workout with him."

"Do it!" you urge.

"You trying to get rid of me?" he grumbles.

"No. I just think you'll feel better if you go. Plus I have a few phone calls to make."

"I don't wanna leave you alone."

"I'll be fine," you soothe. "If anything happens I'll call 911. They'll be here in less than 5 minutes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Go break a sweat. You'll feel better."

Once Joe leaves you make several phone calls to family and a few close friends to give them the news; the only person you can't reach is your best friend so you leave her a message. She calls a little while later when you're finishing up a few chores. You slide onto a barstool at the kitchen counter and accept the call.

"Hey girl," you greet.

"Hey! What did the doc say?"

"C-section."

"I guess we kind of expected that. You know, I think I'd rather have a C-section than a vaginal birth so this seems like a good thing to me."

"Thanks for trying to make me feel better."

"I'm dead serious, girl. I don't love the idea of pushing something the size of a Christmas ham out of my cooch! And you know lil man is gonna have a huge head just like his daddy."

You laugh at her serious tone. "He is big. They estimate he'll be close to 9 pounds."

"Lawd, makes my vag cringe just thinking about it. Remind me to never make babies with a big boy."

"Making babies with a big boy is definitely something I recommend."

"Really?"

"For sure. A damn-near 9 pound baby doesn't seem so bad when you're getting damn-near 9 inches from daddy anytime you want it." You almost drop your phone when Joe clears his throat behind you as your bestie cackles at your dirty advice. You spin your barstool around and lock eyes with him. "Speak of the devil," you murmur. "Listen girl, I gotta run. Call you back later."

"Hey," Joe says, trying and failing not to look smug as fuck.

"Hey Mr. Nosy. You gonna make a habit of eavesdropping?"

"No, ma'am." He smiles as he walks toward you with that long-legged, loose-hipped stride that always makes your knees weak. "I wasn't trying to eavesdrop. I figured you heard me come in."

"Well, I obviously didn't," you snark, trying hard to keep a stern look on your face.

"Obvs," he mutters, laughing when you narrow your eyes at him. "Sorry," he coughs, handing you a gift bag. "I picked up a few things I thought you might like. I know you haven't felt like shopping since …"

You bite your lip as his voice trails off, waiting for the pang of sadness to hit when thinking about that awful day; you feel a flood of relief when the pang doesn't rear its ugly head.

"Thanks," you smile, taking in Joe's deer-in-the-headlights look for a second before reaching into the gift bag. You hear him exhale as you pull the tissue paper out. Over the next few minutes you pull out a ridiculous amount of Bengals and LSU baby gear: several onesies, booties, blankets, bibs, and other baby goodies. "How did you get these?" you ask. "Most of them have been back-ordered forever."

"I pulled some strings."

"Thank you. I love all of it," you gush, struggling a little to slide off the barstool before he steps forward and grabs you by the hips, easing you to the ground as if you're light as a feather. You link your arms around his waist and give him as tight of a hug as your belly will allow, feeling a different kind of pang when he buries his nose in your hair and takes a deep breath, his big hands sliding up and down your back like he hasn't touched you in ages. You get a little flustered at his touch and step back. "I … ummm … I think I'm gonna go take a nap," you blurt out, your pulse picking up at the way his gaze drops down to your lips and lingers there while you speak, like he's considering kissing you but scared of your reaction.

"Sounds good," he murmurs, dragging his gaze from your lips to your eyes. "I'm just gonna crash on the sofa and watch TV."

"Cool," you say, hurrying to the stairs, wondering if you'll ever feel 100% comfortable around him again.

After tossing and turning in bed for about 45 minutes, you finally give up on getting a nap and make your way back downstairs; you hear Joe talking on the phone as you walk toward the living room. "I'm nervous, but I can't let it show," he says. "I've gotta be strong for her. -- I know the risks are lower because the C-section is planned, but it's still scary as hell. I don't know what I'd do if something bad happened. I can't live without her."

That last sentence brings tears to your eyes and you sniffle a bit as they start falling. Joe's head immediately pops up over the back of the sofa. "Gotta go, Mom. Call you back later." He ends the call as you walk into the living room. "How long were you standing there?" he asks. "Long enough," you whisper, wiping tears off of your cheeks as you take in the glorious sight of him sprawled out, shirtless with tousled curls, long legs stretching the entire length of the oversized sofa. "I can't live without you either," you sniff.

"Come here," he urges, patting his bare chest. You crawl between his spread thighs and turn onto your side a bit, laying your belly against him.

"This is the most comfortable I've been in ages," you sigh, eyes fluttering closed as his long fingers massage the back of your neck.

"Good. Get some sleep," he whispers, pressing a kiss on your forehead.

"I feel like I'm crushing you."

"Woman, I bench press way fucking more than your trifling weight. You couldn't crush me if you tried."

You laugh at his cocky tone. "Okay," you yawn, snuggling your face against his bare chest, lulled by his familiar scent as you drift off to sleep.

Later that night, after dinner and a few episodes of Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey, you wake up in bed hot and sweaty. You throw the covers off and lie there for another few minutes before easing out of bed to head for the bathroom. You strip your shirt off and run a cool, damp washcloth over your neck, chest and belly, sighing in relief as the cool cloth caresses your heated skin.

When you're done, you think about returning to bed without a shirt, but you're too self-conscious. You heave a defeated sigh as you walk into the closet for a clean t-shirt, immediately reaching for one of Joe's; a small smile graces your lips as you pull the shirt on. Just a couple days ago the thought of his shirts touching you made you lose your mind. Today it feels totally normal, totally right. It's a small victory but you'll take it.

When you walk back into the bedroom Joe hands you a glass of cold water. "Thanks," you sigh, gulping half of it down before setting it on the bedside table. "You'll be cooler without the t-shirt," he says, his expression heavy with concern as you look up at him in the amber glow of the hallway light. "I'm still not really comfortable with you seeing me like that," you mumble, feeling a little silly. "Stay right here," he says, rushing to turn off the hallway light before turning on a much dimmer bathroom light; he pulls the bathroom door almost all the way closed before walking up to you in the near-total darkness.

"Better?" he asks. "Yeah," you answer, lifting your arms up as he grabs the hem of your shirt and gently pulls it over your head; he then picks you up bridal-style and lays you on the bed. "You want any covers?" he asks. "Just the sheet please," you reply, holding your breath until he slides back into bed beside you. "You good?" he asks. "Yeah," you whisper, feeling weirdly exposed as you try to get comfortable, the silky sheets rubbing against your sensitive nipples in a way that makes your core react. Simmer down, you think to yourself, tossing and turning, restless as hell due to equal parts anxiety and arousal.

After several minutes, Joe wraps an arm around you. "I know you're scared, baby. Wish I could fix it for you," he whispers, pulling you close, your back against his chest.

You squirm in his embrace a little. "I'm def scared but I'm also …"

"Also what?"

"Super horny," you mumble into your pillow.

"Oh." He gives a surprised chuckle. "Well I can fix that," he boasts, pressing a kiss on your bare shoulder before pushing your hair aside to gently blow on the back of your neck. "Let me help," he urges. You hesitate for a bit. "Please?" he whispers.

You eventually roll onto your back, sighing as he gently ghosts his fingertips over your sensitive nipples while kissing your neck. He avoids your belly as he slides a hand down to your crotch, teasing you through your panties for a bit before slipping his fingers inside.

Damn, he's so good with his hands, you think, your breath catching in your throat as he hits your sweet spot, quickly sending you over the edge while he whispers dirty encouragement in your ear.

A few heartbeats later, you finally catch your breath. "Your turn," you whisper.

"You just need to rest, don't worry about me."

You're entire body goes cold. "You're not attracted to me," you state matter-of-factly. "I knew it."

Joe doesn't say a word, just reaches out for your hand and places it on his raging erection. "Oh," you whisper. "Let me help you with that," you offer, gasping when he wraps his big hand around your much smaller one, pumping for a few slow, steady strokes before picking up the pace, his hips snapping up into the strokes for a few minutes before he falls over the edge.

You listen to him catch his breath for a bit before speaking. "I feel sweaty and sticky," you whisper. "I'm going to take a shower." You wait a few seconds before continuing. "You wanna join me?"

"Yes," he immediately answers. "But …"

"But what?" you ask, trying to make out his expression in the semi-darkness.

"We'll have to have more light than this. It's too dangerous to shower in the dark in case you slip. If you don't want me to join …"

"I want you," you interrupt, easing out of bed.

"Are you sure?" he asks, blinking in surprise when you turn on the bedside lamp. His eyes travel from your face to your breasts then down over the swell of your belly before slowing reversing course. When he locks eyes with you again you can tell he's holding back tears, his plump bottom lip quivering in a way that tugs at your heartstrings.

"Come on, daddy," you whisper, holding a hand out to him. He leaps off the bed and takes a step toward you; when he puts his hand in yours you feel something bloom deep inside you, something much more powerful and primal then mere arousal. He leans down and nuzzles his face against your neck just as his tears start falling. You use your free hand to stroke his back soothingly, your own tears streaming down your face for a bit before he leans back and locks eyes with you.

"I love you more than anything," he sniffs, kissing the tears off of your cheeks. "I love you too" you whisper, cupping a hand around the back of his neck to pull him in for a kiss, breathing a sigh of relief into his mouth when the happy tears spilling down your cheeks mingle with his own happy tears in a way that feels cathartic.

The next several days leading up to your C-section are spent almost exclusively together, with Joe working out in your home gym instead of going to Black Sheep or the Bengals facility. Y'all share baths and showers, with Joe insisting on rubbing moisturizer on your belly several times a day hoping to feel Jace kick, his face lighting up every time it happens; after one particularly hard kick, Joe can't contain his excitement. "Gah-lee!" he chuckles. "What a kick! He's definitely gonna train MMA."

"He's most definitely not!" you snap, smiling to soften your words.

The night before your surgery Joe never lets you get more than arm's length away from him, giving you gentle touches on your hips, belly, the small of your back, all while doing an amazing job of playing host to both sets of parents who are spending the night with y'all in anticipation of baby boy's arrival tomorrow.

A few hours after dinner, with both sets of parents tucked into their guest rooms for the night, you and Joe are lying in bed wide awake.

"You're scared aren't you?" you whisper, staring at the ceiling while Joe tosses and turns.

"Is it that obvious?" he asks, rolling onto his side so he can look down at you.

"Yeah." You give him a reassuring smile before tweaking a curl that's fallen onto his forehead. "Fear isn't a normal emotion for you, so it's a little obvious."

"I probably shouldn't admit this," he mutters, "but I've never been this scared." He leans down and gives you a quick kiss before continuing. "When my knee got blown out and we didn't know if I'd ever play football again, I wasn't even remotely this scared. You know why?" he asks.

"Why?"

"Because I can live without football, but I can't live without you."

You feel your entire world condense down to this moment with this man. "I love you more than anything," you breathe, repeating the words he's said to you so many times recently. "And I'm gonna be just fine," you continue, cradling his head when he nuzzles his face against your neck. "Are you excited to meet our baby boy tomorrow?"

"Yeah," he sniffs, fighting back tears. "Excited to bring both of you home and spoil you rotten."

"I'm gonna remind you of that in a few weeks," you tease.

"No need for reminders," he chuckles, giving you another kiss before snuggling you in his embrace.

~ ~ 9 weeks later ~ ~

You rock gently in the rocking chair, staring down at your baby boy who is happily nursing without a care in the world. You close your eyes and let your mind wander back over the past several weeks:

The first few weeks postpartum you and Joe had been dead tired from tending to the constant needs of a newborn. Thankfully it was the off-season since Joe insisted on getting up with you for late-night feedings, which meant neither one of you got good sleep. He was completely enthralled watching Jace breastfeed, and y'all got in the habit of Joe doing skin-to-skin with Jace after each feeding.

Joe handled being a dad with the same mindset he handled everything else in his life -- 100% effort, even on the not-so-fun parts like changing stinky diapers. You thought it was impossible to be more in love with him, but watching him with his baby boy had given you a deeper appreciation and love for him.

Once Jace settled into a more predictable routine, you and Joe had a little more time to be partners and not just parents. You shared a nice amount of non-sexual intimacy during this time -- shared baths/showers, massages, naps and plenty of cuddling. It took a while before you convinced Joe to let you get him off; he thought it was selfish for him to get his needs met since you didn't want him to reciprocate just yet. You promised he could make it up to you when you were fully healed.

Over the last week y'all had eased back into PIV sex, with Joe being super careful -- almost too careful -- with you.

You have other ideas for tonight. You smile as you think about the evening ahead. Gonna put that man on his back and take over, you think to yourself, a swarm of butterflies taking flight in your stomach when you hear the faint sound of the garage door opening.

"Daddy's home," you croon, staring down into Jace's aquamarine eyes as he continues to nurse. He's the spitting image of Joe: a head full of wavy blonde hair, big blue-green eyes, Cupid's bow lips and long legs.

As you wait for Joe to come upstairs, your attention is captured by the shiny bracelet on your wrist. Joe had given you a tennis bracelet with all 3 birthstones on it -- yours, Joe's and Jace's -- alternating with diamonds. You wiggle your wrist a bit, watching the gems glint in the light of the late-afternoon sun streaming in the window.

Joe walks into the room, his face lighting up when he sees you nursing Jace. He approaches quickly, looking down at you for a minute before speaking. "The most beautiful thing I've ever seen," he sighs.

"Yep," you agree. "He's gonna be a total stud just like his daddy."

"I was talking about you," Joe murmurs, leaning down to kiss you. "But yeah, he's a total cutie too," Joe croons, kissing Jace's forehead before standing back up.

"Your turn," you say as Jace finishes nursing, smiling when Joe whips his t-shirt off before reaching for the baby. You switch places, with Joe sitting in the rocking chair cradling Jace against his bare chest and you standing over them. The look on your face prompts Joe to ask you a question.

"What are you thinking?"

"That I've never been happier than I am right now," you whisper, leaning down to drop a quick kiss on Joe's lips.

"Oh you just wait!" he says, smiling ear to ear. "From this day forward, I'm gonna make sure every. single. day. you spend with me is happier than the next."

"Yeah? That sounds like a pretty big task."

"I never back down from a challenge," he brags, giving you a playful wink as you turn and head for the shower, his gaze raking over your curves and his pulse picking up at the hint of promise in your throaty laughter.

#joe burrow #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow fan fic #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow imagine

[inthedayswhenlandswerefew]

Now I’m Covered In You [Chapter 4: Midnight]

Series summary: Aemond is a prince of England. You are married to his brother. The Wars of the Roses are about to begin, and you have failed to fulfill your one crucial responsibility: to give the Greens a line of legitimate heirs. Will you survive the demands of your family back in Navarre, the schemes of the Duke of Hightower, the scandals of your dissolute husband, the growing animosity of Daemon Targaryen…and your own realization of a forbidden love?

Series title is a lyric from: Ivy by Taylor Swift.

Series warnings: Language, sexual content (18+), dubious consent, miscarriage, pregnancy, childbirth, violence, warfare, murder, alcoholism, sexism, infidelity, illness, death, only vaguely historically accurate, lots of horses!

Word count: 6.1k.

Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.

Taglist: @borikenlove @myspotofcraziness @ipostwhatifeel @teenagecriminalmastermind @quartzs-posts @tclegane @poohxlove @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @chainsawsangel @itsabby15 @serrhaewin @padfooteyes @arcielee @travelingmypassion @what-is-originality @burningcoffeetimetravel @blackdreamspeaks @anditsmywholeheart @aemcndtargaryen @jvpit3rs @sarcastic-halfling-princess @flowerpotmage @ladylannisterxo @thelittleswanao3 @elsolario @tinykryptonitewerewolf @girlwith-thepearlearring @minttea07 @trifoliumviridi @deltamoon666 @mariahossain​ @darkenchantress​ @doingfondue​ 

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It paints you like a canvas: sunlight, candlelight, sunlight again.

Two days after the miscarriage—the stillbirth, actually, the delivery, the beginning and the end all at once—you are searching the halls of Westminster Palace, the train of your gown dragging on the floor. It’s just a little too long for you now; it had been tailored to accommodate the additional weight and inches of pregnancy. And the court is just like they were before. They gawk, they jabber amongst themselves, but they can’t seem to think of a single word to say to you. Well…there is one exception.

“Sweet Jesus, what are you doing here?!” Nico exclaims when she rounds a corner and spots you. She rushes over and takes both of your hands in her own. “You look awful, you must be ready to drop over and sleep wherever you fall. Come on, I’ll walk you back to your rooms—”

“I can’t stay in bed for another second. I’m losing my mind. I’m just lying there, useless, staring up at the ceiling thinking about...everything.” The baby. The throne. Aegon. Aemond.

“Oh,” she says, sympathetic and yet proud. She sweeps back loose strands of hair from your face. “You have too much fire in you for that, I suppose. I shouldn’t be surprised. It’s a shame you were born a woman, you could have ridden into battle and butchered people and put all that ruthlessness to good use.”

“Being a woman didn’t stop Boudicca.” And she wasn’t just a woman. She was a wife, a mother.

“And where did that get her?” Nico retorts with raised eyebrows. “Nowhere enviable.”

You can’t think of a clever response. “Would you happen to know where Aemond is?”

“Not presently. He’s been looking in on you, you know.”

You do know: you’ve glimpsed him in the doorway, caught his whispers with the physicians and the midwives and your secretless English ladies. “I need to speak with him about something. To…” You pause. You can’t tell Nico about the poem that’s now hidden in the trunk at the foot of your bed; but you can tell her something else that’s true. “To thank him.”

“He’s been distraught,” Nico says, her voice low. “Quiet, secluded. Even more than before.”

As usual, she sees too much. “Yes.”

“He cares for you. Quite a lot, I think.”

“I’ll check the courtyard,” you say, hoping to change the subject. “Maybe he’s training there.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“No, I think I can manage.”

“What if you pass out and end up out in a field somewhere covered with snow? What if you find a boat and row yourself back to Navarre? What if you’re eaten by wolves?”

“Send out a search party if I’m not back in an hour. But don’t invite Daemon. He’d drag me headfirst into the lair.”

“Alright,” Nico relents, touching your hair fondly again. “One hour. And I’ll chew my nails to bits the whole time.”

“As long as they’ve grown back by the wedding.”

She beams, white teeth and starry eyes. When she at last marries Daeron in August she will be another princess from the Continent, another thread in the Greens’ tapestry. She will be a lot like you…except that she will be in love with her husband. And she will be able to give him children.

But Aemond’s will come before them in the line of succession, you think, with a mournfulness that shocks you. The sons he has with whoever he ends up marrying, Helene of Austria or Beatrice of Naples or Anne of Bohemia. Some other woman, some other future, parts of him I’ll never know.

“I want you to help me choose every detail,” Nico says. “From the food to the fashion.” This is how she plans to distract you from your own misery. And the Duke of Hightower will indulge her: with every pregnancy you lose Nico becomes more relevant, and in any case Milan is a greater ally than Navarre. If the Holy Roman Emperor’s daughter ends up crossing the English Channel, she will eclipse you both.

“I’ll endeavor to not be eaten by wolves until August,” you tell Nico, and then head outside into the courtyard.

Aemond isn’t sparring there with Sir Criston Cole; with the exception of a few amorous couples strolling through the powdery white snow, the courtyard is empty. You pass next through the palace gardens, frozen and naked, their treasures—angelica, feverfew, St. John’s wort, betony, chamomile, rosemary, pennyroyal—long-since plucked and dried and stored away for winter. Aemond isn’t there either, and he isn’t in the royal stables when you enter them, horses chomping noisily on oats and hay.

You go to Vhagar’s stall and she pops her great shaggy head out to greet you. “Hello, you big monster,” you murmur, smiling. You run your palm down the white stripe of her blaze. She’s killed people, and everyone knows those stories; she stomped one man to death and kicked another in the jaw, trotting away and leaving him to drown in his own blood. That was before Aemond tamed her when he was still a boy. He mellowed her, or she mellowed for him, and however it happened they’re both better off for it. She’s a weapon, the same as his sword or his strategies. She has a role to play in the Greens’ battle for the throne as well.

There’s rustling from Sunfyre’s stall, too loud to be a rat or a bird. You cross the aisle and peer inside. There on the floor, half-covered in straw, is sprawled your husband. Sunfyre looks passively down at him, stems of hay sticking out like porcupine quills from his muzzle.

“Aegon?!”

“Shh!” he pleads, waving one hand drunkenly. His white-blond hair falls over his face like a veil. “I’m hiding.”

“From who?” But the answer to this is obvious; you know before he says it.

“Grandsire. He’s furious, he’s a demon. He’ll have me drawn and quartered.”

“What’s he so upset about?”

“Oh, the same old thing, I’d imagine,” Aegon says vaguely. His shortcomings, his embarrassments. Then his murky ocean-blue eyes focus a bit and his voice goes tender. “Are you in pain?”

“I’ve had a lot of wine. It helps some.” Takes the edge off, smooths down the fangs, dulls the knowledge that parts of you are still collapsing down to fill the space where your child once lived. Blood drains away, blood fills up again, blood readies itself for the inevitable next attempt.

“Good,” he says, though uncertainly. His sentiment is clear, but he doesn’t know how to express it.

“Have you seen Aemond?”

“Not today.”

You sigh. “Never mind, then. I’ll keep looking.”

“Should you be running around the palace like this?”

“I haven’t done any running in a very long time. And I’m confident I can find my way back to bed when I need to.”

Now Aegon is gazing up at the stable ceiling, studying eaves and bird nests like constellations. “It should have been him,” he exhales like a confession.

“What?”

“Aemond. It should have been him. The one to shoulder the responsibility, to reign. I don’t belong someplace where people watch me. I have nothing to show them that they want to see. I belong someplace warm and wild, someplace I can disappear. Is it such a crime to not want to be held to a higher standard than an inconsequential man? Is it such a crime to not wish to be remembered? I never asked to be the heir. Not even the king wants me to be the heir. How am I the one in the wrong here?”

“I think many of us wish for things we cannot have,” you reply morosely.

“We could have them,” Aegon counters. “If we ran far enough.”

“That’s a coward’s way out.”

“I’d rather be a free coward than a jailed prince. Or a dead one.”

As if to emphasize his point, you spy something odd about his saddle, hanging from a massive iron hook on the stable wall. You move closer to scrutinize it. Then you return to Sunfyre’s stall. “Someone cut your stirrup,” you say, frightened. “Before the Christmas boar hunt. It’s sliced clean most of the way through and then the rest of it must have ripped as you were riding.”

Aegon squints up at you. He’s mystified. “Why would someone do that?”

Your exasperation—your contempt, not for him but for his failings—must show on your face.

“Please don’t look at me that way,” Aegon says. “Not you. Mother always loved Aemond more, Father always loved Rhaenyra, Grandsire loved the throne. You are the only thing I’ve ever had that’s supposed to be mine.”

And now you’re the one who is imagining a traitor’s death: hanged momentarily, cut down and thrown onto a table, drawn open like a gutted animal as the crowd’s screams mingle with your own, dissected into quarters once your belly is sufficiently emptied. Because surely you’re the worst sort of traitor there is. “You must be more careful,” you implore Aegon. And he smiles; he takes this as a token of affection.

You finally find Aemond somewhere you should have suspected. It’s where people go to find peace, solitude, wisdom. He’s sitting in a cascade of kaleidoscopic light pouring in from the stained glass windows, scenes of King Arthur and Saint George, lovers and swords and dragons. You slide into the pew, cool austere wood. The small private chapel is abandoned except for the two of you. On the altar is a cross: blood, pain, sacrifice, redemption. Aemond has his hands folded and propped on the back of the next pew. He stares straight ahead, grim and silent. He must know you’re there, but he doesn’t make any sign that he does.

“I don’t mean to interrupt,” you say.

“You’re not interrupting. I was just speaking to God, but I’m finished now.”

“Do you believe he can hear us?”

“I used to.” Still, he keeps his eye on the altar. Flecks of luminance pepper his skin: gold, ruby, emerald, sapphire. “You’re wearing green,” he marvels. He can see you well enough for that, a blur on his periphery.

“Yes. Like ivy.”

And only now does he look at you, afraid and yet with fragile hope.

“Aemond,” you say softly. “I didn’t know.” I longed for it, but I didn’t know.

Long seconds tick by, ten, twenty, a hundred. “I have envied Aegon my entire life,” he says at last. “I have felt that I was more suited to be the firstborn, to be the heir. I have watched him squander opportunities and defile morality and bring nothing but heartbreak to my mother. I have worked myself to the bone to prove myself worthy of what he was freely given. I carry scars in the shape of his absence. I have always envied Aegon. But never more than the day I watched him marry you.”

You move without thinking, reaching for his hands and interlacing them with your own. “Please don’t hide from me anymore. I can’t endure it. Not added to the weight of everything else.”

He feels your cheeks and forehead, his brow crinkled with hushed concern. “You’re in pain.”

“I was alright when I left my bedchamber. Now…” Now the cramping is very bad again, and the strip of thick linen folded between your legs is nearly soaked through with blood, and your mood is sinking; you feel shaky and insurmountably sad, like you could rupture into tears at any moment.

He is distressed. “Why did you exert yourself like this?”

“I had to find you.”

He stands and offers you his arm. “Then now that you have, allow me to escort you back to bed.”

“And you’ll stay for a while?”

He smiles, warm, a flicker of candlelight in a dark room. “I’ll stay for as long as you’ll let me.”

You walk very slowly together, you clutching his forearm, Aemond distracting you with English legends: myths, monsters, men. But he does not speak of children. Westminster Palace is frenzied when you step inside, courtiers rushing around and hissing gossip back and forth to each other. Greens and Blacks appear to be equally scandalized; you wonder what has happened. As you and Aemond make your way down a hallway—your steps halting and dizzy—Prince Daemon sails by wearing a cruel smirk, sharp, delighted, Scottish deerhounds loping alongside him. And then you peek into the Great Hall and you see them: the Montfords, Lady Joanna’s parents and uncles and her handsome, ambitious brothers. They’re all beaming and radiant, though they really have no reason to be, now that Aegon is long past bedding Joanna and the Montfords can no longer call upon the Duke of Hightower for any exceptional favors. Come to think of it, you haven’t seen Joanna since around the time Nico arrived in London, since August, since you discovered you were pregnant again. That was five months ago. The Montfords are passing around an infant swaddled in green cloth, showing him off to the other powerful families of Southern England, accepting compliments and proposals of betrothal to wealthy newborn daughters. From what you can tell, the child is fat and mewing and…and…

You gasp, and Aemond swiftly directs you farther down the hallway before anyone notices you watching. He says nothing, but you can read the shock and fury on his face. Because Lady Joanna Montford’s infant is a healthy living boy with silvery white hair just like Aegon’s. Because her child is a Targaryen.

There are yelps and whimpers coming from Aegon’s bedchamber. Somebody must have found him hiding in the stables after all. The door is open. Inside the Duke of Hightower has backed Aegon into a corner and is slapping him: his head, his face, his hands when he tries to shield himself. Aegon’s pale skin is freckled with angry pink welts, his hair in disarray. There are still bits of straw knotted in it.

The Duke of Hightower seethes: “To do this, to have a bastard before you’ve secured the succession! It’s a disgrace! You have muddied the waters yet again, you have undermined certainty when we so desperately need it, when all of our lives depend on it! You should be putting every last ounce of the miniscule effort that you possess into producing a legitimate son with your wife—!”

“Grandsire, she’s not capable of it!”

Then they see you, and Aegon has the decency to cover his face in shame; but the Duke just glares at you, as if he wouldn’t mind hitting you too, as if you are dangerously close to becoming an enemy.

~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks after the miscarriage, the royal family has gathered for a private dinner. The occasion is Daeron’s sixteenth birthday, although the king mentioned it once and then seems to have promptly forgotten again. He is admiring a collection of tiny woodcarvings of horses that Joffrey has made, praising them as if they are great treasures, handmade tapestries or poems or blades. Alicent, much to the contrary, fawns over her youngest son. She frets with his curly white-blond hair—trying to make it lie neatly, a pointless aspiration—and asks Nico about wedding plans. Nico is effervescent, bubbling over with enthusiasm for fabrics, colors, cakes, flowers.

Aegon sits to your right, Aemond to your left. Your husband is drowning himself in wine and peering blearily down at the trappings of the table: duck, mushroom pasties, spinach tarts, salmon pie, bread, and makerouns of course, Daeron’s favorite. Aemond doesn’t say much, but he ensures that your cup stays full of apple cider and your plate piled high with winter delicacies.

“I can’t,” you complain when he serves you another spinach tart. You’re still bleeding, although it has lessened considerably. You still have very little appetite. Weight has fallen off you like leaves from autumn trees since you lost the baby, a fact that no one seems to have noticed except Aemond.

“Try,” he replies, and slices you a portion of duck too, the browned skin crackling and shiny with grease. Across the table, Daemon and Rhaenyra exchange fleeting caresses and gazes warm with desire. Jace chats politely with Baela, Luke giggles with Rhaena. They all wear lustrous black like a uniform. Even the king wears it, accented with maroon the shade of dried blood.

“We must get you a real horse,” King Viserys is telling Joffrey, who smiles adoringly up at him. The king coughs into his sleeve and then continues. “Would you like a Marwari, like your mother has? They’re nimble, gorgeous creatures, and with such peculiar ears! They’re very rare as well, only bred in North India. Seafaring traders can bring some here for you to choose from. They come at a great cost, but you are worth it, don’t you agree, Joffrey? You know, India was once partially conquered by Alexander the Great. He…”

Aemond glances longingly at the king; it’s a split second, and then it’s gone. You are well aware that Aemond knows very nearly everything about Alexander the Great. The king never speaks to him about it. He rarely speaks to Aemond at all.

You lay a hand on top of Aemond’s. “Will you tell me about it later?” you ask him. “Alexander and India?”

He smiles, his cheeks blushing pink. “Of course.”

The Duke of Hightower clears his throat loudly. “I have some happy news to share.”

King Viserys looks up, as if suddenly remembering that the Greens are here too. “Oh? Do enlighten us, Otto.”

“After much negotiation, the Holy Roman Emperor has formally agreed to a match between his daughter and Prince Aemond.”

“Very impressive, Otto!” The king claps politely. He’s already resuming his conversation with Joffrey, a six-year-old.

“Wonderful!” Nico heralds cheerfully. “Lose a Helaena, gain a Helene!” She holds her cup aloft in a toast, then lowers it as she observes the awkward atmosphere of the table. You and Aemond are so determined not to appear heartsick that you can only avert your eyes, Alicent frowns anxiously, Daeron is bewildered, Aegon drinks. Rhaenyra forces a stiff smile; Daemon watches you, deep-set eyes gleaming with dark mirth.

“Well…” the Duke says. “Perhaps I should have started with the unhappy news. Princess Helene is dead of fever, God rest her soul.”

“Oh, the poor girl!” Alicent laments, crossing herself. “And poor Frederick and Eleanor.”

“Fortunately, Frederick still has one daughter left—only one—and he is willing to send her to us.” The Duke doesn’t have to say what this means aloud: that the Greens have risen ever-higher in the Continent’s estimation, that their allies grow mightier and more numerous by the day.

“How fortunate,” Daemon quips. “Always a wise idea to have children to spare.” He winks at you, swigs his wine, licks red drops from his lips. His Scottish deerhounds, which follow him everywhere, sniff around the table for scraps. “And who is the lucky bride-to-be?”

The Duke of Hightower is glowing. “Kunigunde.”

“Kunigunde?!” Aegon blurts out, then drops his head back down when the Duke glowers fearsomely at him. “Jesus Christ,” he mutters, staring into his wine cup. “What the hell kind of a name is Kunigunde?”

“She sounds…” Daemon raises his white eyebrows, choking back laughter. The Black children are following his example and snickering derisively, even little Joffrey, who doesn’t have the slightest idea what this marriage represents. Even the king smiles. “Germanic.”

“You’ll like her,” the Duke informs Aemond, ignoring his detractors. “You should be crawling on your knees to thank me for this match. You think I’ve taken no notice of your hard work, of your sacrifices, but I have. Kunigunde has received an extraordinary education for a woman. She studies astronomy and mathematics and history, not just languages. She practices archery. She is a renowned horsewoman and hunts often. She is intelligent, and she is bold, and she is precisely the sort of woman you would choose for yourself, is she not?”

“She is,” Aemond admits gravely.

“Kunigunde,” Aegon mumbles again, incredulous.

The Duke continues: “And so when she arrives you will wed her and bed her and I will hear not a single word of complaint about it. You will like her, or you will grow to like her, or you will endure it with grace if by some miracle you don’t like her. Is that understood?”

“How romantic,” Daemon chuckles. “A toast? To love?” He lifts his wine. Only the other Blacks join him, their cups clanging merrily against each other.

“I’ll be delighted to make a new friend, at least,” Nico says. “And one from so distant and vast a kingdom!”

Alicent nods distractedly. “Yes, we’ll have to ask her all about what it’s like there.”

“Hmm.” Daemon bites into a halved pomegranate, spilling juice like rubies, like blood. “Now my curiosity is aroused. Tell me, Navarre, what is your homeland like this time of year?”

“That depends on which region you have in mind,” you say frostily. Aemond is glaring at his uncle, measuring him, waiting, coiled. “The mountains are cold and snowy, the valleys are more temperate, the deserts are stark but still golden. Navarre is beautiful, even in January. It might be the most beautiful place there is.”

“You don’t find it to be…rather…” Daemon grins, pieces of pomegranate seeds caught between his teeth like bits of organs. “Barren?”

The table goes silent. Time slows until it stops. You should have a barb of an insult to hurl back at Daemon; you open your mouth to loose it like an arrow. But nothing comes out. Instead, hot sudden tears brim in your eyes and begin to spill down your face, your skull filled with flashes like white lightning: What would we have named him? What would he have been like?

Aemond bolts from his seat and goes for Daemon, fists swinging. Everyone is yelling; chairs are tipping over as people leap to their feet. Nico is shrieking and swearing at Daemon as her betrothed holds her back, his hands linked around her waist. Aemond’s knuckles crack across Daemon’s face as guards flood into the room and struggle in vain to separate them; Daemon strikes out, scratches, bites, yowls like an animal. Rhaenyra is pulling Rhaena and Joffrey away to safety. Unprovoked, Aegon pitches a handful of salmon pie at Baela, then screams and flees when she scrambles over the tabletop in pursuit. Alicent intercepts her, pinning Baela’s hands to her chest where they pose no threat. Jace and Luke try to join Daemon, but the Duke shoves them aside, bellowing ferociously, words you are too panicked to register. In the melee, Daemon snatches up a fork, turns to Aemond, and aims for his remaining eye. You dart beneath the table and knock Daemon off his feet, catching him unprepared. He whirls to you with his back against the floor, eyes glittering savagely, and, roaring, stabs at you with the fork. You duck, but the metal skates across your cheekbone, drawing a thin stripe of blood. The Scottish deerhounds are snarling and snapping at you. Aemond yanks you away and drags you to the other side of the room as Daemon follows, reaching for the hilt of his sword.

“Enough!” King Viserys thunders, and the turmoil dies. Alicent flies to him—attempting to pacify—but he ignores her.

“He must pay!” Aemond shouts, pointing at Daemon, whose nose is bloodied from his blows. “He must pay for what he’s said, for what he’s done!”

“It looks to me that he already has,” the king replies impatiently. He grimaces at everyone present, with no lines drawn between the blameworthy and the not. “This rivalry, this petulance, this bitterness, it must end!” He turns to the Duke of Hightower. “You must restrain your branch of the family, Otto, just as Rhaenyra must gain better control of hers—”

“Viserys, Daemon has ceaselessly antagonized the princess—!”

“I am not Viserys!” the king booms, then pauses to cough. “I am the king, I am your king, and since there seems to be enduring confusion, allow me to clarify some things, some exceedingly fundamental things. I have already chosen an heir, and it is Rhaenyra.” He looks to Daemon. “You have nothing to fear from Alicent’s children. You have no cause to provoke them. It is a waste of your many talents.” Now the king addresses Otto. “You can glorify your house however you see fit, but remember where this all ends. Rhaenyra and her heirs will inherit the throne upon my death. It stays with her, that is my most ardent wish. It is treason to undermine it. By all means, increase the wealth and status of your dukedom. But never forget who gave it to you.”

The king sweeps out of the room, Rhaenyra and her children following closely behind him. Alicent stands there helplessly, abandoned, forgotten. Nico and Daeron comfort her instead. Aegon meanders back to the table, sighs deeply, and pours himself a fresh cup of wine. Aemond examines the shallow gash across your cheek. Daemon watches, a dozen guards stationed between you and him. Growling Scottish deerhounds flank him like the train of a gown.

“I’ll kill you one day,” Aemond says calmly, matter-of-factly.

Daemon shrugs. “You’re welcome to try.”

And then he’s gone.

~~~~~~~~~~

Two months after the miscarriage, the physicians say it’s time to try again. They are the ones who decide: not you, not Aegon, not either of the people whose bodies are requisite to the task. Just old men in the service of another old man: the Duke of Hightower. Men who have never had to feign pleasure as they were groped and invaded. Men who have never felt a child tearing from their own flesh, nor the cramping and blood that follows, reminders that are impolite to speak of.

Aemond keeps you company; you don’t even have to ask him to. Your ladies are no longer surprised when they walk into your rooms to find him there. He, Nico, and Daeron are frequent visitors, far more frequent than your own husband. You read together, or Aemond reads and you embroider, or you play card games, or you simply talk until the stars have rolled by overhead like a wheel and the first golden bars of daybreak spill in from the windows. Tonight, as you wait for Aegon to arrive—full of anxiety and impatience and hope, full of dread—you are embroidering a pillow with Vhagar’s silhouette. Aemond is sitting beside you on the bearskin rug and reading a book about the kingdoms of the Iberian Peninsula, including Navarre. The fireplace pops periodically, heat and red-golden light, sparks and shadows. Aemond is dressed in his usual dark green attire, but you’re only wearing a white nightgown. Once someone has seen you sobbing on the floor and coated with the blood of failure, it seems useless to try to reclaim your modesty.

“Does this look like a horse?” you ask Aemond doubtfully, showing him the pillow.

He blinks at it. “It certainly looks like…a large land-dwelling creature. Of some sort.”

You sigh defeatedly. “I’m so damned nervous. My fingers won’t cooperate, I can barely feel them.”

“I’d still enjoy the pillow. Even if Vhagar looks suspiciously like one of Hannibal’s elephants.”

You laugh. “Yes, that nose…a travesty, surely.” You set aside your embroidery. It’s a lost cause this evening. You stare into the fire, feeling warmth like the sun on your face, so hot it nearly burns.

“Why are you still nervous?” Aemond asks gently. “After all this time?”

“Will you be nervous when you’re expected to fuck Kunigunde?”

“Yes,” he says, a bit startled.

“Only the first night? If she never stops feeling like a stranger to you?”

“No,” he admits. “Perhaps not.”

“That’s why I’m still nervous.”

Aemond closes his book and studies you pensively, firelight dancing on his face. Several miles away in the Tower of London, the bells toll twelve times: midnight.

“He won’t be here,” you say, relieved and yet broken, no end of your prison in sight. “Not tonight. And why would he be? Who would want this, the way it is between us? He’s fumbling and drunk, I’m a resigned liar, both of us trying our best but just waiting for it to be over. Rhaenyra gets to enjoy lying with her husband, Nico will enjoy it when it’s her turn, but I don’t. I never will. I’ll never know what that’s like.”

Time slinks forward. It seems like an eternity passes before he speaks, dust to pyramids, castles, cathedrals, civilization and then back to dust. “I could show you,” Aemond says, so quietly you might have imagined it.

You don’t understand. “Show me what?”

“How good it can feel.”

You gape at him, stunned. “I can’t lie with you.” And then you think immediately, like a traitor: Can I?

Aemond shakes his head, staring down at his open palms. “Only my hands.”

You should say no, here in your bedchamber waiting obediently for his brother to arrive, here on the skin and fur of a beast Aemond killed for you, here with sweltering flames inking you both with amber-rust light like sunset, like dawn. But something stops you. It’s the fact that Aemond knows you somehow, all of you, or very nearly all; and when he stumbles into one of your rare secrets like an unfamiliar room he wants to get down on his hands and knees and memorize every floorboard, every fleck of paint. You nod, moving towards him, your nightgown whispering against your bare skin. “Just this once?” you ask.

“Just this once,” Aemond agrees.

You can already feel yourself aching for him, muscles and nerves waking up, violent red craving. You press your left palm cautiously to Aemond’s chest. “How…?”

“It’s alright. You can lean against me.”

Your right hand travels up to rest on the back of Aemond’s neck; you can feel his long silvery hair ghost across your knuckles. You inhale him: leather, smoke, musk, darkness and possibility all tangled up together like the two of you are now. One arm circles around your waist, drawing you in even closer, until your thighs are touching. You wonder what his bare, defenseless skin would feel like on yours; you wish the clothes between you were in a pile on the floor. But that is far, far too risky. You could not remedy that instantly if there was an unexpected knock at the bedchamber door.

Aemond’s pale blue gaze—rapt, intense, starving—stays on yours as his other hand settles on your ankle. His fingertips move slowly upwards, tracing your skin lightly, slipping beneath your nightgown: calf, knee, thigh. He hesitates there: one last chance for you to stop him.

“Yes,” you murmur instead, resting your head against his chest, listening to the pounding of his heart. And already, you know this will be different; everything about it feels different. Because Aemond is the one here with you.

He reaches between your legs and finds warm, slick folds that are already wet for him. His breathing hitches, then quickens, his ribcage rapidly expanding and caving in again, a cycle like the moon or the seasons. He drags his fingers through your wetness and then places them on a spot that Aegon always paid great attention to, although to little effect. But when Aemond touches you there—experimenting with different pressures and motions—you are swept up in a euphoric riptide that can only carry you higher, higher, higher still. You’ve glimpsed this feeling before, but you’ve never been able to get lost in it. You are gasping, restless; your hand on the back of his neck wanders and inadvertently knots in his hair. “I’m sorry—”

“No,” he says, low and husky, meaning: no, don’t apologize, no, don’t stop.

“Aemond, something’s happening…”

“I’m here. I’ve got you.”

His fingers circle more quickly, more powerfully. You moan and bring your lips to his throat, delicious heat and salt flowering there. You fight the instinct to bite down, to leave bruises, to mark him as your own. He’s not yours and he never will be, and no one can know all the irrevocable ways he has written himself into you like the ink of a poem, words scaling the scarlet walls of arteries and veins, rhymes in your bone marrow. The pleasure keeps mounting; every time you think it can go no higher, you climb to a new height like the steps of a staircase. “I can’t stand it—”

“Almost there,” he pants, and pushes a finger into you, the heel of his hand still grinding against the place where the sensation is greatest. Your hips move in time with his thrusts.

“More,” you beg helplessly, and Aemond glides a second finger inside. You twist your grip into his tunic, into his hair. You meld yourself into him, never feeling close enough. Now he’s nipping at the line of your jaw, his free hand against your face, his whispered voice telling you to relax, to breathe through it, that it’s alright to give in. And then your eyes flick down and see the outline of him through his trousers—how large he is, much larger than his brother, thick and long, perhaps even too much for you to take—and it is this, the thought of having Aemond completely, of him spilling himself into you in body as he already has in soul, that sends an indescribable wave jolting through you: heat, ecstasy, contracting muscles, bursts of color.

“Stop, stop, stop,” you say in a rush when it ends and you’re too sensitive to be stroked. Aemond’s hand stills, but he keeps his fingers inside you, feeling your walls throb around him for what he undoubtedly fears is the first and last time, resting his forehead against yours, trembling all over.

Your thumbprint skates across his parted lips, and then you cup his face with both hands and kiss him deeply, soft and slow. It might as well be your first kiss, your only kiss. It blows the past out of you like stormwinds ripping up homes and centuries-old roots.

You tell him when it finally breaks: “I wish it could be you.”

Aemond searches your face, then kisses you again, fiercely this time, with an unspeakable desperation. Then he rises to his feet and leaves, no goodbye, no plans, no promises.

And when Aegon does stagger into your bed the next night, you’re able to nudge his hands into the perfect position and close your eyes and think of his brother, and for the first time you reach a shuddering, breathless peak with him. You try to stifle the sheer intensity of your pleasure, the arching of your spine and the way your fingernails bite into his skin, leaving dark pink blooms like roses. But he knows this time is different.

“Well, wife,” Aegon says, grinning roguishly. “I think we’re getting better at this.”

~~~~~~~~~~

In the morning, Aemond fetches you without a word of explanation. He leads you to the royal stables, where the last of the winter’s snow and ice is melting away, dripping from the eaves like rain.

“Are we going to take Vhagar out walking…?”

But Aemond breezes right past Vhagar, who watches you both with large, intelligent eyes as she crunches on a mouthful of oats. He stops at a stall that has always been unoccupied, ever since you first arrived at Westminster Palace over a year and a half ago.

“What—?” And then you see her: pure glossy black like onyx, long mane and tail, intrigued ears pricked forward towards you. She’s heavy with muscle, bigger than Sunfyre or Caraxes, almost as large as Tessarion. “Oh, Aemond…”

“She’s an Andalucian,” he says, anxious, hoping you’ll approve of her. “I wrote to your brother Alonzo and arranged for her to be shipped over from Navarre a month ago, but she’s just arrived today.” He smiles faintly, wistfully. “So don’t think she is a gift for services recently rendered.”

You smile back. “I don’t recall having the opportunity to serve you.”

He flushes, but tries to ignore it. Still, his eye traces the curves and valleys your emerald green gown, all those places he never got to see, to taste.

You pet the Andalucian’s inky muzzle and she consents, nickering contently. “I never thought I’d have my own horse here,” you say. “Not unless I gave Aegon a son. Maybe not even then.”

“What will you name her?”

You look at Aemond as you answer, your eyes dark with craving for him, a curse you can’t break, a spell you’d cast over and over again. “Midnight.”

#aemond x y/n #aemond x you #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen #aemond one eye #aemond targaryen x you #niciy

[blackypanther9]

Elizabeth ? - William x Male!Reader

A/N: This is split in two Chapters, because it would have been too long otherwise. TvT

WARNING!: Mention of corpse, cursing, mention of possession AND MORE! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

It had been five months since Penelope Liz Afton and Alex Zero Afton were born. William was mostly in bed, recovering, when he was walking around, M/n stayed around or Mike was written sick from school to keep an eye on his Father.

Evan mostly looked out for his new siblings, still feeling like trash, that he didn’t say anything about Lizzy sooner. M/n told him to keep silent about that to William, because he didn’t want him to stress out. He was recovering, there was no time for him to stress. He had to feed the babies, lose weight and heal.

M/n knew for a long while that William healed best when he slept a lot and ate more than usual, so he told him to stay in bed mostly. While William was recovering and breastfeeding the Babies, M/n, Henry and Mike tried to do his jobs.

Mike took care of the finances, so they all got paid and sometimes took over the Nightshift in Fredbear’s. He offered to also go to Circus Babies Entertainment and Rentals, but M/n refused him. Sometimes, Reina also came over and helped out, by cooking and telling Mike to not overwork himself. M/n was thankful for her. Michael was like William if it depended on it, he was a workaholic. Will would smack Mike over the head and tell him to sleep, if he knew.

Henry took care of both of the restaurants and took over most of Will’s Nightshifts. He took full control of the Restaurant, paying the bills, dealing with the Costumers, doing the paperwork, etc.

M/n helped where he could. He went shopping for food, he helped Henry out by doing a part of the paperwork from Fredbear’s, he took the Nightshifts, he tried to repair the Animatronics, if they broke down, remembering what William taught him and explained to him, just anywhere, where he could, he helped.

Evan was always watching his siblings. When they fuzzed and Will was sleeping, he tried to cheer them up and calm them down. He was afraid of loud noises, yes, but he wanted to be there for his siblings.

They did all they could in those five long months. At the third month William started to exercise a bit, losing the extra weight that stayed after childbirth. As the fifth month was half over, finally, William was fully recovered again.

Henry put him on a strict working and break schedule. He was allowed to work for 20 minutes, with one hour break in between every 20 minutes, so he can feed his Babies and catch a breath. If William won’t keep to the rules, Henry will put him on 4 years of Maternity. William was always bad with breaking habits, the Babies needed feeding until they were at least a year old and they can be very random too and then William has to decide with the Babies, if they want to continue with the breast feeding a bit longer.

Henry will not have William overwork himself for the next 6 years !

As William was working, M/n made Michael responsible for his newborn siblings, telling him that he had something else to do, something important. That was when he finally had enough time to look for Elizabeth.

He put on William’s old Circus Baby’s working clothes, took the old ID, to get inside the elevator, and stole the spare keys from William’s safe, in their Bedroom. Then he left, telling Mike and Evan to not utter a WORD of where he was going or where his stuff went. They promised to be silent. Evan was worried and felt sick, while Michael was confused as to why M/n, his Dad, would go back to that old place.

Not many went there for the Nightshift, nor the Dayshift. That day it was even closed, because of repainting Circus Baby’s Gallery.

So here M/n was now, staring at Circus Baby. He stood a few feet away from it, not wanting to get too close in case. He sighed and stared. He was hoping that he will get Elizabeth back.

“Circus Baby, power on.”, M/n demanded.

The Animatronic reacted.

“Circus Baby.exe.powering on.”, the System informed and not long later the eyes of the machine started to glow.

M/n almost choked in shock as he saw the eye color. William didn’t change it, he knew that.

‘Why are they green, like Elizabeth’s ? They were blue the whole time !’

M/n was VERY cautious. He glared at the machine. It glared back.

“Alright...You are one creepy clown. I really don’t understand what Lizzy saw in you... Let us open your Stomach and see if Evan didn’t dream what happened.”

The Machine didn’t move for a while, then it nodded and stayed still.

“If you stupid thing try to kill me, I will dismember you, PIECE BY PIECE.”, M/n swore darkly.

No reaction from the machine. M/n went in front of it and opened the stomach cavity. What he found made his heart drop and he felt sick. The smell was horrid and the sight was not better either.

“Oh God...”, M/n muttered.

He carefully pulled out the body. The DEAD body of Elizabeth. It was already rotting and it smelled really horrid, it also was very mangled.

“Fuck, Lizzy...”

He let tears escape his eyes, saddened and struck by grief. Elizabeth was dead and she was for a while now. He didn’t even notice that Baby closed her cavity and came closer. She was also struck by grief, remembering who M/n was.

She needed his help. She wanted to go HOME. She wanted her Daddy, Brothers and him back ! She was so scared and alone... She HATED it ! She should have listened to her Daddy...

“I’m so sorry Lizzy. We tried to find you and there was no trace of your whereabouts. Mike forgot his pills and thought he hallucinated, Evan was too scared to tell us, we didn’t check Baby, because we thought you didn’t go near them anyways, we didn’t see you on the security cameras and the police stopped trying to find you after a while. I am so sorry. I failed you as a Dad...”, M/n babbled in grief.

Circus Baby’s eyes widened in shock. So her Daddy and M/n were serious.

“We planned the wedding a month ago and...and you have two new siblings too. Alex and Penelope. You would have loved them, Lizzy. I bet you would have loved to support your Daddy through that difficult time as he gave birth to them. Evan and Mike were so brave and supported him, they were with him in the same room, comforting him. You would have been so proud.”

At that Baby couldn’t stay silent anymore. It hurt her that M/n thought she was gone. She wanted to go home and meet her new siblings, wanted to know what else she missed out on, wanted to be there when they will marry...

“D-Dad...”, Baby stuttered out.

M/n froze and whipped around, seeing Baby right behind him. He sprung up with Lizzy in his arms, glaring at the machine.

“Stop it ! You are NOT Lizzy ! You are the very machine that KILLED OUR LIZZY !”, M/n yelled outraged.

“Dad, p-please... I-I’m scared. I...I became Baby after I died. I don’t...I don’t know h-how it happened. Papa, please take me home. Please do something ! Help me, please !”, Baby said, scared and broken.

She fell to her knees, oil leaking out of her eyes. She was so scared that M/n will leave and not believe her. M/n was shocked.

“I wanna see Mikey again ! I wanna go back to Daddy a-and Evan ! I wanna go home, Papa ! I don’t wanna stay here ! It’s so dark and quiet in here... Papa, please, help me...”, Elizabeth begged.

M/n stared at Circus Baby.

“Lizzy ? Is that really you ?”

The machine nodded.

“My Daddy is William Afton, you are his Boyfriend, M/n L/n, I have two Brothers, Michael Afton and Evan Afton. Evan is very afraid of the Animatronics, Daddy made, and Mikey bullied Evan, because his friends forced him to do it. I was the youngest of the Family.”

M/n stared in absolute shock at her.

“You are definitely Lizzy... Fuck...How...how will I be able to...”, M/n was thinking hard about what to do.

If he told William three things might happen. A: William will go insane B: William will tell M/n that he has gone crazy and he will put M/n into an asylum C: William will lose his shit and believe M/n, trying to help Lizzy to look normal again and overwork himself again.

“Papa, please don’t leave me...”, Elizabeth begged.

“I am not planning to, but...I don’t know what to tell William. There are too many options that he would NOT understand...”

“Bring me home and then tell him. I am the proof, right ?”

M/n was in deep thought, then shook his head.

“No, we are going to Uncle Henry. He will know what to do and how to trick William into making something, without freaking out. As soon as he made something, Henry asked of him, to make you look normal, we will tell William. I can’t have him overwork himself again.”

Baby nodded. Together they left the Pizzeria and made their way to Henry’s.

-Time skip-

“You have gone crazy, M/n.”, Henry claimed agitated.

“I am not, Henry. Believe me, I thought I was going crazy, but Baby talks like a human, not robotic anymore, not in code and she knew things about the Afton Family, only Lizzy knew. PLEASE help us with her. I don’t know HOW she possessed the very thing that killed her, but I NEED you to convince Will that it would be for a new project. Anything that can make her look less robotic.”, M/n begged.

“How did you even know that Elizabeth died by Circus Baby ?”, he asked suspiciously.

“Mike and Evan saw it happen. Mike forgot to take his pills and thought it was just in his head and Evan was too scared to tell us. He only told me recently after the Babies were born. I wanted to investigate sooner, but we were all very busy with replacing Will, until he was better.”

At that Henry grew very concerned and less wary. He started to get the picture. He sighed and massaged his temple, already feeling a headache to arrive soon.

“Fine, I will help you.”, Henry then said.

“Thank you, Henry ! Thank you.”, M/n thanked him relieved.

Then small footsteps were heard and Charlie appeared. She looked around the corner.

“Dad ? Why is CB here ?”, she asked her Father.

“Hi Charlie !”, Baby/Elizabeth greeted.

Charlie stared at the robot and Henry sighed.

“Circus Baby is here, because Elizabeth is with her. Don’t tell Uncle William, okay, Sweetheart ?”, Henry asked.

“Okay !”

“Thank you, now go play.”

Charlie left quickly. As she was out of earshot, Henry turned back to M/n and Circus Baby.

“If this is a trick, I will kick your ass, M/n.”, Henry warned.

“I promise it is not.”, M/n swore with honesty.

Henry sighed and got out a Blueprint from his top shelf, Charlie couldn’t reach. He opened it and let M/n and CB take a look.

“I call it an Illusion Disk. They are supposed to change the appearance of the Animatronics. Recently, some children asked for Animatronics that can change their looks on the stage, like in some Movies, where the Characters suddenly wear different clothes, without ever going away to change into them, you know ? I’ve sat on them for almost 3 years now, without William knowing. Maybe...if I get his help on them and beat a bit around the bush to make him believe that it is only for the Pizzeria, he might find a way to make one of these with way better features. Will is a genius, I don’t doubt him on that.”, Henry explained.

“Henry...You. Are. A. GENIUS ! Thank you ! Oh my Gawd, if this works, Lizzy will look normal again and Willy will be so happy again !”, M/n cheered.

“Wait....Will isn’t happy ? I thought he got over Lizzy.”

“He...he didn’t. He still blames himself and gets frequent Nightmares, I try my best to avoid them to happen.”

“Oh Lord...”, Henry said softly.

M/n looked away, not wanting Henry to see how helpless M/n felt.

Henry went to the phone he had and dialed William’s number. He picked up after two rings.

“Henry ! What do you need, Pal ?”, William asked happily.

“Hey, Buddy. Can I come over in a bit ? I have a new invention, I think you will love, to make with me.”

“Oh, uhm...Sure ! By the way...do you know where M/n went ? Mike and Evan said that they don’t know and he is nowhere in the house and he also didn’t leave any letter behind that told me where he went... I am worried. Mike said he didn’t see M/n in almost two hours.”, William asked worried.

Henry side eyed M/n, who had a face of guilt.

“I think he went to Fredbear’s. He said he wanted to check on everything, just to make sure everything was okay. He might have just forgotten to inform you, I will drive there and pick him up, then come over, okay ?”, Henry lied.

“Yeah...o-okay. Thank you Hen.”

“No problem, Will.”

Then Henry hung up and he glared M/n down.

“You didn’t leave any message to him, so he WON’T worry ?! Are you stupid or are you brain dead ?!”, Henry yelled.

“I’m sorry ! I forgot ! I wanted to figure everything out as quick as possible !”, M/n quickly apologized.

M/n knew ONE thing...Henry was very protective of William. Since William’s wife was such a bitch, he got overprotective. The slightest discomfort William showed and Henry was ready to smack the offender with a bat. Henry was scary when he was like that.

“Next time this happens, I won’t hesitate, to smack you with a frying pan, M/n !”, Henry growled out.

M/n sweat dropped and had a nervous smile on his face. He might be a Killer if it is the only way to keep his Family safe, but even he was scared of Henry and his threats.

“U-understood, S-Sir !”, he nervously saluted.

-Time skip-

Henry arrived with M/n at the Afton Family’s house. As soon as William saw M/n, after opening the front door, he pulled him into a tight hug.

“Idiot ! Tell me next time !”, William scolded.

“Sorry, Love...I forgot to leave you a message. I won’t forget again.”, M/n said softly.

“Dumbass ! God knows what could have happened to you !”

“I’m sorry, Darling.”

“You better !”

Henry closed the front door behind him as William pulled M/n inside and pushed him into the Living room, forcing him to sit down on the couch. M/n looked at his Bunny in confusion.

“Bunny ? What are you planning to do ?”, M/n asked.

“You have a time out for at least ten minutes ! I don’t want to hear anything from you nor are you allowed to get up until ten minutes are over !”, William scolded.

M/n stared at his Lover with an agape mouth, shock evident. Then he closed it and pouted.

“Fair...”, he admitted and then stayed seated.

William stared at M/n, dumbfounded. He didn’t expect M/n to listen. He expected him to drag him to their Bedroom and to have some rough Love making instead, but nothing... Was it because Henry was here ? William wanted M/n to screw his brains out !

M/n stayed silent, looked at the wall in front of him and didn’t say anything at all. Why was he so...tame today ? Usually he would punish HIM for trying to command him around.

“So Will, I have the Blueprints. I am sure you will LOVE it. I bet you have some awesome ideas to them too.”, Henry pulled William from his thoughts.

“Oh ? Let me see.”, he said and stretched out his hand.

Henry gave William the Blueprint, he took a look at them and was confused.

“Tell me what this is supposed to be, Hen.”

“An Illusion Disk. Some kids are bored of the Animatronics just looking the same all the time and others are scared of them, so I thought about this ! They are supposed to make them look more human like, to change their design, without building anything to it. All that we would need is the Illusion Disk, program it and then we can just put an illusion OVER our Animatronics ! They would still look the same without them, but with them on, they will look different !”, Henry explained in excitement.

William’s eyes sparkled and had small stars in them. He LIKED the idea.

“Oh ? How long have you been planning on this, Hen ?”

“About three years. This is just the ground that I made, maybe you can add a bit more to its features, when we built them.”

“Impressive. They would have to look very real though, do you think we can built something like that ? Such Technology wasn’t used before, Hen.”

“I am VERY sure, Will ! You and me, we are VERY smart and intelligent men, after all ! We both have great ideas and they ALWAYS work out too ! We made Circus Baby’s and Fredbear’s together with ANIMATRONICS, Will ! That Technology wasn’t ever used before, back then, either ! We MADE it happen !”, Henry encouraged with enthusiasm.

William smiled brightly and nodded.

“Okay then ! Let us start in my office ! I can’t wait to start !”, William said with excitement.

Henry smiled and followed William. Henry turned around and made eye contact with M/n, winking at him. The plan was working...for now.

Michael entered the room soon enough, with Evan in tow. They both looked at M/n.

“What did you do in Circus Baby’s ?”, Mike asked.

M/n looked at him and then at Evan, who was looking very ashamed still. M/n smiled.

“Don’t tell your Dad, but I found Lizzy.”, M/n answered.

“What ?! Where is she ?!”, Michael yelled.

M/n shushed him and looked at the hall, waiting for the Basement door to open, but it didn’t. He sighed in relief.

“Something weird happened with Elizabeth. She doesn’t look like herself anymore, boys. Uncle Henry knows and is trying to help me out, by making something, called and Illusion Disk, so Lizzy will look normal again. Until then, do NOT tell your Dad. He will have a heart attack if he sees her the way she looks like right now.”, M/n explained.

“Is...is Lizzy hurt ?”, Evan asked.

M/n looked at Evan with a saddened face.

“Come here Evan, on my lap.”

Evan did as told and Mike stood in front of M/n. The Incubus held Evan so he doesn’t fall off of his lap.

“When Lizzy was ‘eaten’ what did you think happened with her, Ev ?”, M/n asked.

Mike looked at Evan in horror. Elizabeth was EATEN ?!

“I...I thought she d-died...”

M/n took a deep breath and looked Mike in the eye.

“The day it happened, Mike, you forgot to take your pills and thought you just hallucinated, as Baby pulled Lizzy into her stomach. It...it did really happen though and Evan was traumatized by it, then he was too scared to tell us anything. He told me after Alex and Penelope were born, what he saw. I went back to investigate.”

Michael stared at M/n in horror.

“Wh-what did you find ?”, he asked.

“What Evan, right now thought. I found her dead body, reeking of death for weeks.”

Michael took a step back, covering his mouth, face fully covered in horror.

“But that was not all of it, Mike. There it starts to get strange, my boys... Lizzy was still around. She...stayed.”, M/n added.

“Wh-what do you mean, Papa ?”, Evan asked.

Mike was just as confused.

“Circus Baby’s eyes changed from blue to green and she started to act like Elizabeth. She knew things about us, only Lizzy knew and she begged me to get her home, that she had no idea how she ended up possessing Circus Baby...she begged me to find a way home for her. I don’t know how something like this is possible, but I believe that Lizzy truly possessed Circus Baby. The very thing, that killed her. She is at Henry’s right now and we are trying to find a way to make her look more like...well...Lizzy again.”, M/n explained.

The boys stared, eyes wide.

“Dad, you do know how insane this all sounds, right ?”, Michael asked.

“I know, but the proof is at Henry’s house. She doesn’t act like a robot anymore, nor is she talking robotic like. She talked like a human being and moved as such too. It convinced me, that she is possessing CB. All we need is time, more proof and something to make her look normal again. When we have all of that, I will tell William and hopefully...he believes me a little bit and...is finally happy again. With everything advancing in technology, we even might modify her Disk over time and she could be a full human again, who knows ? I am praying that I found Lizzy’s soul, but can you blame me ? I want my Love to be happy again. Yes he loves Alex and Penelope, but...he still blames himself and feels empty about Elizabeth’s disappearance.”

Both the boys had pain in their eyes at that. They knew William was still not over Elizabeth’s sudden disappearance and he will NOT take it lightly, when he finds out that she died by his own Machine’s hands.

“Mike.”

“Yes, Dad ?”

“Do me a favor...for all of us, okay ?”

“What is it...?”

“Keep away from the Animatronics and keep Evan, Alex and Penelope away from them too. Protect them with your life, if Will and me aren’t around. What happened to Liz, is exactly the reason he tells everyone to stay away from his Machines. They can malfunction and if that happens, you can lose your life. They are safe from a certain distance, but don’t get too close to them. Stay at least three feet away from them. Can you do that for me ? Watch over your siblings ?”

Michael nodded with determination.

“I will do my best to keep my siblings safe.”, he replied.

“Thank you, Mikey.”

With that Mike sat down next to M/n and they started to watch Movies, not wanting William to hear anything, he wasn’t supposed to hear.

-With William and Henry-

William was already planning more features and what should be the best material to built the Illusion Disks with.

“It has to look and FEEL realistic. When you touch a thin arm, you can’t let it happen that the Illusion breaks and you feel a thick arm instead. That would be a bad green screening. You understand Hen ?”

“I do Will, but how do we make that ?”

“I will ask M/n ! He can program stuff very good, maybe he knows how to make it or he can give me some tips !”

“That is a great Idea, Will ! “

William smiled and noted it down.

‘I hope he won’t find out, that we are only making these now for his daughter, who became a literal Circus Clown...’, Henry thought in nerves.

William would so beat the shit out of them, if he finds out, BEFORE they can show him that CB is possessed by Lizzy....

“Hen, you with me ?”, William asked.

Henry snapped out of his thoughts and nodded.

“Yup, all ears, old friend.”

“Good.”

With that William continued to add and explain why he added more features. Henry listened in all the time, but his nerves never calmed down. He was scared shitless if William will find out...

Hopefully he will not find out too soon. ;)

#William Afton/DaveMiller x Reader #Male!Reader #Incubus!Reader #FNaF #Afton Family #Five Nights at Freddy's #M/n's Pet #Part 5 #Elizabeth ? #Purple guy #William Afton x Reader #Dave Miller x Reader #William Afton/Dave MIller #Evan/Chris/CC Afton #Micheal Afton #Elizabeth Afton #MY AU #Read Warnings above !

[ceapa-mica]

Pregnant with Thrawn's Baby 🤰 - a headcanon

This is probably the longest hc I've written so far. Took me some time to do some research since I'm childless.

❗Warnings: angst, mention of miscarriage and death (neither happens dw) non-graphic childbirth❗

Reader's gender is not mentioned but they have female reproductive organs.

Taglist: @bingbongooo @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @ele-millennial-weirdo @enaelyork @jesslove23 @thrawnalani @thrawnsboots @twincesskorisoka @davesrightshoe @shoe-bag @blackddarling @obbicrystaleo

You have been married to Thrawn for quite some time and the thought of having a baby crossed your mind on several occasions by now…

When you finally tell him about it and ask if he would be up to being a father, he's surprised at first. He never really considered the idea. You're the love of his life and the only person in the entire Galaxy he would trust to have his child. So after a moment of getting used to the idea of fatherhood, he agrees that he wants to try for a baby with you.

When you finally get pregnant, it makes the idea of becoming parents so much more real for both of you. It's an overwhelming feeling neither of you have ever known. There is something special growing inside your belly, something whose wellbeing exceeds your own.

Thrawn hires the best doctors of his fleet to take care of your medical needs during your pregnancy.

You receive troubling news early into your pregnancy. The doctor tells you that it's quite common for hybrid pregnancies to end in miscarriages due to the body rejecting a fetus where half of the DNA is not of the same species.

That fear sticks with you throughout your pregnancy, but thankfully your body does not reject your baby.

Thrawn makes sure you don't get stressed. He's really worried stress could trigger a miscarriage. He spoils you more than usual and takes as much time as he can for you.

He loves to see how pregnancy changes your body. He doesn't mind if you gain a few pounds and says that means there's just more for him to touch. He loves your stretch marks, he sees a beautiful artistic pattern in them. To him they're art, and he shows his appreciation for art of any kind. This one though he worships not just with compliments but also with kisses.

There is also a clear difference to non-hybrid pregnancies. Look, with a hybrid the body has to grow a child whose DNA is 50% foreign, which makes it a lot harder. It really takes a toll on you.

Aside from common pregnancy symptoms like fluid retention, breast pain and an appetite for the strangest food combos, symptoms of a hybrid pregnancy include a kind of fatigue where you are often too weak to do more than the most necessary tasks like eating, drinking and if lucky taking a shower. You're just soo tired, and slightly depressed really. You wanted your pregnancy to be an exciting time in your life and even have a baby shower celebration. Plans you cancel due to the seemingly never ending fatigue.

Tbh your current state scares Thrawn. And this man is rarely scared of anything. He's super worried to the point where his thoughts wander to you during work hours when he's usually focused on his work only.

Everyone on the Chimera knows about your pregnancy and rumors about your wellbeing are making the rounds. The crew, especially on the bridge, is supportive and understanding, knowing the weight on Thrawn's shoulders is immense right now.

When he returns from his job, he cuddles up next to you, cradling your swollen belly in his large hand. The baby often moves when he touches your belly or when he simply talks to you.

You become a regular in the medbay during those nine months. You lose weight despite eating enough and get heart palpitations.

Thrawn feels guilty for putting you in this situation. You both want a baby, but at what cost? He's worried your body won't recover from this. He always calculates every possible outcome, and now he's confronted with the possibility of you not surviving.

The doctors tell Thrawn that you’re unlikely to die though, and that you will make a full recovery after the baby is born.

He reads up on parenting while looking after you. He absorbs the knowledge of those helpful holobooks like a sponge, saving it for later.

He has mixed feelings. He's scared something could go wrong and he ends up having to raise your baby alone, on the other hand he's excited and looking forward to meet this little creature you're carrying.

You manage to carry the baby to term. You’re in bed watching your comfort holoshow when you go into labor. Thrawn isn’t with you, but he gave you a comlink for emergencies.

He's there in a heartbeat and won't leave your side. He takes you to the medbay and holds your hand the entire time.

Eli Vanto drops by and brings Thrawn caf and for you your favorite snack. Weeks prior you and Thrawn have asked him if he wants to be the godfather of your child in case something happens to the both of you. Eli felt honored and agreed.

You lose any sense of time during labor. It's just hour after hour of pain. Thrawn remains by your side, not once leaving. You have never seen him with shadows under his eyes before, even when he claims that he's not tired, which is clearly a lie.

When your baby’s first scream fills the air, something shifts inside your heart. You get the overwhelming need to care and provide for your newborn.

The nurse droid hands your baby to its father. He tells you it's a girl and kisses you, smiling into the kiss. He's not even hiding his emotions at this special moment. Thrawn is not someone who would cry, but you notice how his eyes look glassy when he looks at his baby daughter.

He cuts the umbilical cord and takes her to clean her up. As expected, fatherhood looks good on him!

When he returns her to your chest you breastfeed her for the very first time. That's when you finally get a good look at her. She has (your h/c) fuzz on her little head and her (your s/c) skin has a blue hue to it. Her bright eyes have white scleras like a human, but her irises are crimson, typical for Chiss, just like the ridges on her forehead.

Thrawn can't take his eyes off her either. He's fascinated by her, in awe that he was capable of helping to create something so beautiful. He thinks she looks like art - absolutely extraordinary. He has never seen a Human-Chiss hybrid in person, only heard rumors in the Ascendency.

You agreed on names for either gender months prior. You’re gonna name her Mitth’>add Chiss name of your choice here<

The news of the Chimera’s newest crewmember spreads rapidly. Soon friends of yours wait by the medbay and Thrawn steps out to officially announce the birth of your child to them.

Thrawn sends Eli in to look after you two. When he holds your daughter for the first time he's immediately enraptured with her. He knows there's nothing in the Galaxy he wouldn't do for this tiny bundle of joy.

After delivering your daughter you need a lot of time to recover. You help as much as you can but it takes weeks for you to get back on your feet.

Having another life depending on you can be very demanding for both your mental and physical health. Thrawn makes sure you eat healthy and take your vitamins. He works less hours and his crew is more supportive than ever. It's a shame he can't just go and take paternity leave.

You quickly learn that a baby has the communication skills of an alarm clock. You miss the deep naps you took during your pregnancy where barely anything could wake you up.

When Thrawn isn’t at work he helps you with your daughter in any way he can. You can always count on him when it comes to your little one. You see the pride shining in his crimson eyes whenever he looks at her, or talks about her. He also wants to hold her all the time.

For the first time there is something more important to Thrawn than his primary mission. You came into his life, showed him what falling in love is like, accepted him with all his flaws and became the mother of his child. You and your daughter mean more to him than his service to the Empire or the Chiss Ascendency. He would tear down the Galaxy if it meant keeping the two loves of his life safe.

Thrawn dreams of taking you and your child to the Ascendency one day. He wants to introduce you to his family and for your daughter to learn about her heritage.

You read that right, it's up to you 🫵🏻 to name your Chiss daughter. Let us know in the comments what you chose to name her, if you like.

The next headcanon will be pure family fluff. 🥹

#thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #mitth'raw'nuruodo #blue man hot #thrawn x reader #thrawn x you #thrawn headcanon #thrawn fanfiction #star wars rebels #ahsoka series #star wars #dad! thrawn

[birthedstars]

Continuation of M.I.E with 3 different kinds of women. Infertile women who wants a child so badly, School teacher leading a lesson on childbirth and a lady whose just had a homebirth a few hours prior.

M.I.E Part 3

Part1 | Part2 

Cause of The M.I.E: Leon Johnson 

3 Days After the initial Incident. 

Leon sat stiffly in his room. The cries of four babies echoed from the upstairs bedroom. His mother had given birth to triplets and his sister had suffered with one big baby. 

His parents were strangely silent toward him when they arrived home from their own ordeal. Leon chalked it up to the M.I.E, but something still felt off. 

Alexa was quiet too, but it was clear she was still dealing with the shock of suddenly and violently becoming a mother. She put up more of a strong front though 

Leon turned on the TV. Most news channels were running special interviews and investigations on the people affected by the M.I.E. There was a whole hour long interview with a pilot who had given birth while trying to land a jumbo jet full of birthing and laboring people. It was pretty exciting and scary to hear about. But Leon always felt oddly fascinated by them. Proud in a way. He couldn't explain it. 

Incident No. 5013

Location: Yaounde, Cameroon

Victim: Zuri Epwene

Age: 28

Zuri desperately wanted a baby. Yet, years of trying has led to nothing. She stared blankly at the negative test on her bathroom sink. Tears were all dried up by this point, she was just tired of it. Her husband was probably tired of it too but he never showed it out right. It was probably best they give up on trying to conceive for both of their sakes. 

Zuri sighed and got up from her toilet. She had more things to do rather than mourn a dead fantasy. She tossed the test in the trash. Just as she was about to leave she felt an odd warmth enter her belly that gave her pause. 

A few seconds passed and suddenly, Zuri's stomach lurched forward. 

"Huh!? OW!" Zuri shouted, her hands springing toward her belly. 

It felt bloated under her shirt. Swollen. It lurched again, forcing her palm outward and her shirt riding up her suddenly expanding bump. The weight made her knees bend with every lurch. Her breasts started to expand out of her shirt, the fabric around chest strained as they grew. Zuri tore off her shirt bra just so she could breathe. 

She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She looked…pregnant. Damn near ready to pop pregnant. She was carrying low, her belly button was stretched flat, she had a linea nigra down the middle of her dark skinned stomach- it was unmistakably a pregnant bump. 

Just when she thought it was over, her stomach exploded with growth again. This 3rd time was worse. Forcing her skin to stretch even further than she thought possible. She screamed, her fingers dug into her rapidly swelling skin. Stretch marks quickly appeared on the underside of her bump. 

Zuri looked between her giant belly and the mirror. Her belly hung low, and pointed out like a bullet. All the weight settled low in her womb, it didn't look like it could get any lower. Movement rolled through the tight surface of her belly, making her heart swell. This was what she yearned to feel for so long. 

"I have to be losing my mind…," Zuri's hands traveled across her giant swell with wonder.  

Then, something hard dropped in her pelvis. A hard seizing constricted her full belly making her shriek. Pressure, so much pressure. A silky film bulged out of her contracting cervix. Then it tore. Liquid leaked from her opening, dripping into her shorts. Before she even registered it, the bulge ruptured. Water cascaded down her legs and an intense contrast gripped her belly. The head of the child forced its way through her unprepared cervix. 

Zuri, mouth wide, dropped to her knees underneath the pressure. Her stomach contracted viciously. She screamed as the huge head of her baby shot through her. Her body pushed and convulsed against her will. The big baby was tight in her canal. Zuri desperately pulled her shorts down to her knees as her labia started to burn. 

"It's too fast! Too fast!" Zuri leant back on her hands, bucking her hips and swollen belly upward. 

A scream clawed its way out of Zuri's throat. The huge head was unrelenting and quickly burst out of her nearly torn crotch in a rush. Zuri's lower half convulsed as her womb seized her hard and pushed the rest of the baby out onto the floor.  

Zuri fell onto her butt with the release. Her still taut belly moving up and down with her labored gasping. She looked down to see the huge baby on the bathroom floor, starting its first cries. 

Before she could bend forward to pick the baby up, another stomach crushing contraction wrapped around her. Another hard ball shoved itself into her cervix. 

"Another one!" Zuri's stomach contorted roughly as she shrieked. More fluids gushed out of her pussy and the 2nd baby's body shot through her ravaged canal. 

Her labia stretched out wide for the baby's head. Zuri's pelvis vibrated with the pressure. The head was so big. So,so big. Zuri drew her chin into her chest and pushed with the constant seizing. Her torpedo belly lurched forward and the head launched out of her pussy along with the shoulders. 

Zuri nearly fell back onto the bathroom floor. A mess of sweat, fluid and blood covered her bottom half.Zuri bent foward and picked up both babies with nothing but shock and awe on her face.

"Zuri! Are you ok?! The entire town is chao-," her husband screamed as he burst into the bathroom. 

The big twins were just beginning to cry in Zuri's arms. The shock melted off of her. She didn't even register her husband's worry-filled questions when he slid to her side. All Zuri could think about was, no matter how fleeting, she'd felt them grow inside her, felt them travel through her, and she could feel their warmth on her skin. It was real. She'd finally gotten what she wanted.

Incident No. 75678

Location: Dhaka, Bangladesh

Victim: Sadiq Raman

Age: 39

"Alright Class, who can tell me what the three phases of the second stage of labor and childbirth are?" Sadiq asked his class of nearly 60 students. 

The class was silent. Several students looked like they were mulling over their answer so as not to expose themselves for not reading last night's material, others looked distracted and disinterested. College students were supposed to be burning the midnight oil, not coming to lecture completely unawares. 

Sadiq sighed and took out a stack of papers. "Fine then, pop quiz. We'll see who knows how childbirth wor-" 

Suddenly, Sadiq felt a warmth enter him. It was odd. Not a feeling he's felt in a very long time. He looked around the room. All of the female students shifted uncomfortably in their seats, looks of discomfort crossing their faces. 

Sadiq gasped as his stomach lurched forward suddenly, almost breaking the buttons around the midriff of his blazer. All of the female students started shouting in alarm. Their stomachs expanded to various sizes underneath their shirts and dresses. From behind him, his assistant's stomach also suddenly grew, but busted through the buttons of her shirt. 

"What in the…" Sadiq said in shock looking between his newfound belly, his freaking out students and his assistant. Sadiq quickly unbuttoned his strained shirt. His stomach looked like he was 3 months pregnant. What is going on, is it just bloating? Was something wrong with what we ate this morning? Sadiq thought. He quickly looked at his assistant who had done the same as him, but her belly looked as if she was at the 6 month mark. Before he could even check on his students, everyone's bellies lurched forward again.

Sadiq's belly grew further to almost the size of an early third Trimester belly. He grunted as the weight suddenly hit his pelvis. Movement from within accompanied the lurching, making Sadiq's hands shoot toward his belly. A baby? No that's impossible, i shouldn't be able to-

Sadiq's thoughts were cut off by his stomach expanding once again. His belly turned into a swollen, perfectly round full term belly. His knees bent 

His teaching assistant was laid out on the floor, gargantuan belly towering over them. Students were either on the floor writhing or trying to get. 

Suddenly, Sadiq heard a scream from near the door, then a splash. A heavier set student was gripping the doorknob with one hand and their swelled stomach with the other. Shock crossed their face as fluid dripped onto the tiled floors. 

The room was silent for a second. The a wave of screams and gushes went across the room. Every girl in the class was having the waters broken one after the other. A torrent of fluid burst from Sadiq's assistant that made her buck her hips. Sadiq turned to help her, but a sharp pain stabbed into his stomach and crotch. His own waters burst out of him, soaking his pants. Intense pressure and pain shoved down into his inner opening. 

It was the head. It was forcing its way out. Sadiq leant on his podium as his now dropped belly contracted in him. The baby was forcefully stretching him open. 

Some of the men instantly tried to help their suffering peers. Pulling off skirts, pants and offering a shoulder to lean on. The young women were in hysterics. One student's baby slid roughly into her pants, but her stomach was still huge and contracting. Another, having gotten their skirt off, had two legs dangling from her crotch. 

"Professor! It hurts! It's too big!" His assistant shrieked on the ground. There was a huge wet bulge at the crotch of her jean's. Sadiq forced himself to the ground, his own burden starting to force his hips wide and burn his crotch. His stomach heaved with brutal contractions. He couldn't take his pants off yet, not until he helped his assistant at least. 

He got between her legs and yanked her strained jeans down to her knees. Her panties were struggling to hold the baby. The fabric was tearing at its thinnest parts. His Assistant, unable to resist, arched her back and pushed downward. Sadiq quickly stripped the panties off her crotch and the huge bodied baby shot through her. The assistant shrieked as the baby's head and shoulders slightly tore her pussy in parts. 

His assistant fell back onto the floor huffing for air with the insanely huge baby crying on the ground between her bloodied legs.

With her taken care of, Sadiq finally pulled his pants and underwear down to his knees, immediately feeling the full, burning crown in his crotch. His body forced the child down now that the path was unrestricted, his tan stomach lurched and seized. The head gushed out of him, followed quickly by the shoulders. The baby fell into Sadiq's pants and started wailing loudly. 

  The entire class room was still filled with both the screams of his students continuing to birth twins and triplets and newborn babies crying . Sadiq got up from the floor with his baby in hand and wide waddled toward some of his still laboring students to help. He had no idea how the hell this happened, but at the very least, everyone in the class will be able to answer questions on childbirth. 

Incident No. 908

Location: Merida, Yucatan

Victim: Gabriela Ortiz

Age: 19

Gabriela breathed tiredly. It had only been 2 hours since she'd given birth. Since she pushed a big, 9 and ½ pound baby boy into the world. She still felt the phantom pain of contractions through her crotch and stomach. She massaged her still distended belly. It felt so weirdly empty, yet she felt good about it.

The ordeal of carrying such a big boy on her small body exhausted her near the end. Even with the support of her boyfriend, Emile, and close family. Only her midwife, her grandma, and Emile were there for the birth though. H

Emile was on the bed, settled close next to her. His body was comforting and solid. His eyes didn't move from her or their son in her arms. 

"You made such a beautiful boy, Ela," Emile whispered in her ear. 

"He's a cutie, huh?" Ela said. 

Suddenly, she felt a warm sensation feel like it slipped into her worn cervix. Ela flinched a bit and massaged her postpartum swollen stomach. Then her stomach lurched. Hard. 

"Ohh fuck!" She shouted, her hand gripping her stomach. 

"Ela? What's wrong?" Emile took the baby from her grasp. 

"My stomach hurts. I don't know wha-" 

Her stomach jumped out even harder, expanding to the size she was 7 months into pregnancy. Her linea and belly button quickly regained their form on her swollen belly. 

"What the hell," Emile whispered. He took their son and placed him in his crib. 

Gabriela's stomach roughly jumped out again, stretching her even larger than when she was full term. 

"W-whats happening to me?!" Gabriela babbled, gingerly holding her swollen tight stomach. Suddenly, she felt movement, a kick. Its not possible. There was no way a twin just appeared in her stomach. 

"Get grandma, get her up n-" 

Ela then felt something drop. Then a horribly sharp pain went through her stomach. A burst of fluids shot out of her labor worn canal.

Shock crossed her face as she felt the pains of labor rip through once again. She cried out her boyfriend's name. The sides of her stomach drove inward on the mass inside her.

A scream erupted from her already worn throat as the huge mass bore down through her canal. Her hand clutched the hard surface of her fecund mound, it was so much tighter drawn than before. Her body forced her baby through her cervix. It already being stretched and worn made it find its way to her vaginal opening quite fast.

The huge head barreled through her speedily. The head quickly stretched her beyond her limit, her mouth was agape with searing pain that exceeded what she felt with her son. Her womb contracted hard, forcing the child's head out of her with a spurt of hot fluid.

"Ela, heads out! You're doing great!" Emile encouraged. 

"I'm not doing anything!" She screamed back. 

 It felt like her body was working against her, without her say. It was only concerned with forcing the foreign child out. But, her physical limits couldn't expel something so big. The baby's shoulders rammed against her hips. Over and over until Ela was bucking her hips in pain. Her pelvis creaked like it was threatening to give and her body just contracted harder on her. Ela crumpled the sheets of her bed in her hands and pushed desperately. 

"My god, what is happening," Gabriela's grandmother burst through the door. "What's all the scream-" 

"THE SHOULDERS ARE STUCK!" Gabriela's shrill cry echoed through the home. "I CAN'T PUSH IT OUT!"

"Get her on her hands and knees, boy!" Her grandmother, instantly in midwife mode, ordered Emile. 

Emile forced his strong hands around Gabriela's convulsing body and started to turn her off her back. She could barely help him with the constant pain she was in. 

Once she was on her knees, her grandmother forced one of her legs up. Ela felt the baby move a bit as soon as she did. 

"FUUUUUCK!" Gabriela's back arched as she finally bore down and her constantly constricting stomach. 

The shoulders unhitched itself from her pelvis in the new position. The shoulders shot out of her and warm fluid burst from Ela's vacant pussy. Gabriela fell flat on the bed when the pressure finally subsided. 

Gabriela could feel the exhaustion overtake the adrenaline and her eyes started to grow heavy. In her boyfriend's hands was a baby girl bigger than her first born. She decided right there it would be a couple years before she even had sex again.

#birth fiction #labor fiction #maiesiophilia #birth kink #labor kink #preg kink #fpreg #birth fic #labor fic #transpreg #mpreg #ask box #M.I.E

[jessicaslittlelovesickmess]

Forever Seventeen- Chessy

Chessy x Platonic Fem!reader

Words: 1,034

Warnings: suicide, angst, hurt comfort, sad Chessy, mother Chessy

You would’ve loved this

Chessy glanced out the kitchen window as she prepared lunch, yeah, you really would’ve loved this she thought to herself with a sad smile. It had been raining all day, nearing storm-like weather but not quite, all she knew was you and her would’ve been outside drenched to the bone by now.

She missed the way your wet hair smelt as you rested your head against her shoulder while she carried you inside. The way your perfume filled the kitchen as you would float about, your cherry shampoo that clung to her shirt after you rested on her chest.

She missed you

Your little sneeze that hadn’t changed since you were in diapers, the childlike giggle you possessed, the quick wit, your intelligence that made men shudder.

She missed waking up to you curled into her side as if you weren’t almost eighteen, how hugs had become mandatory, your small hand constantly playing with her long hair.

The sound of your voice, Fleetwood Mac filling the home everyday because that was the first record she had ever played you. The way you would try to impersonate Stevie Nicks but only sounded like Cher, how beautifully you sang everything.

Don’t be sad- she could almost hear you whisper, you had told her, you had always told her not to be sad, not to cry. You told her that you were sick, that you would get better, and you promised her to try but she couldn’t blame you, not really.

She had watched your relationship with your father from the sidelines, he never paid you any mind especially when the twins had been born, Hallie had been his twin. He spent every free moment with her only ever paying you mind when you got to the top of the class, only ever lasting a day or two.

The truth was he was scared, he had lost your mother in childbirth and he was scared to lose you too.

Sighing Chessy picked up the knife once more, it had been almost a year since you’d been gone and the sting still felt the same. She still occasionally burst into your room with her latest joke same as Hallie would only to be met with your neatly made bed, windows closed, silence and missing you.

Sometimes she liked to believe that she could see you pulling faces at her through the window as you read in the sun outside. She could feel the weight of you beside her as she slept or did anything really, that you were near her and that was enough to keep her sane.

Tears clouded her vision, dropping the knife she quickly left the kitchen almost sprinting to the bathroom. She could imagine you today, you would’ve watched the weather and laughed, and you would’ve whined grabbing her hand and attempting to drag her outside with a smile.

She would’ve rolled her eyes and acted like she hated the idea but still would’ve grabbed your coats while you grabbed the boots. She would’ve yelled out to watch your step as you ran down the wet stairs too eager to be in the rain.

As she turned on the tap looking in the mirror she swore she had seen your face, splashing her face with cold water you were gone from the mirror. Turning around she sighed falling to her knees she felt crazy, Nick seemed so unaffected by your absence that it made her angry.

How was he allowed to seem fine after losing his daughter but she couldn’t “oh Y/n/n” she whispered to herself brokenly as she lightly grasped the locket you had gotten her for her birthday.

Opening the heart-shaped charm she smiled sadly, fresh tears beginning to slide down her flushed cheeks “my baby” a picture of you and her on mothers day at school. You were so small she thought, biting her lip as she tried not to sob, her baby, 1998, the year Annie returned and the year she lost you.

Hallie had gone to Camp Walden, she made you promise that you’d be here and you did with fingers behind your back. Hallie was all too excited to share you with Annie ‘Sissy’ she called you, oh how hard it was to tell them. Annie had been dying to meet you only to watch Nick sigh with a shake of his head as he kneeled to her height “she’s gone, Hal”.

Everyone was tense when they saw the real Hallie at the hotel, she refused to believe Annie over the phone, pushing past everyone in search of you she finally cried as Chessy tightened her arms around the girl. “Sissy?” She asked looking up at the woman with glassy eyes, Chessy shook her head “no baby, no Sissy” the painful scream that reverberated from the girl’s throat following the heartbreaking sobs “but she promised”.

Hallie had clawed her way out of the woman’s grasp before running away, Elizabeth looked over to Nick before helping Chessy from the floor. Annie had run after her sister “I’m sorry” she wanted to scoff saying that sorry wouldn’t bring you back or take away the pain.

The image embedded deeply in her mind of you slumped over the desk, she thought you had just fallen asleep until she had seen it. The pills scattered around your face like a halo laughing back at her, the panic that had set instantly in her chest as she let out a shrill scream.

You were only seventeen

Nick had come running, watching as Chessy held you over the trash can her fingers lodged down your throat as you vomited, eyes too heavy to open, his hands shook as he grabbed your bedroom phone calling for an ambulance.

“I’m sorry Y/n/n”

She could hear the twins talking in their room, Hallie sighed before mumbling something that made the woman pause “too bad Sissy isn’t here anymore, you would’ve loved her”. It had been hard adjusting to your absence, Chessy more than anything but she had raised you, she had been your closest friend and above all, she was your mother, it may not have been by blood but it was an understanding that went unsaid.

#imagine #lisa ann walter #lisa ann walter x reader #chessy x reader #chessy #the parent trap #angst #chessy imagine #melissa schemmenti #melissa schemmenti x reader

[justabigoldnerd]

"If I Could Hold You For A Minute"

By JustABigOldNerd on Ao3

Tags:

POV Gaby Teller, POV First Person, Pregnancy, Letters, Childbirth, Polyamory, Established Relationship

Characters:

Illya Kuryakin, Napoleon Solo, Gaby Teller

Word Count:

2,050

Summary:

A letter from Gaby to her newborn baby.

I know there isn't a huge audience for this kind of thing, but @thattripleabattery on Tumblr's Mini Kuryakin and @pippinoftheshire 's first person pov WIP had me INSPIRED

Excerpt:

At first, I thought I was just gaining weight. The possibility wasn't entirely out of the question, after all I did have a live-in chef. With Solo at the stove, both Illya and I have occasionally gained a few pounds, only to work it into muscle. However, this weight,  I could not seem to lose. Then I became ill. Poor darling Illya was convinced someone had poisoned me. I was checked over by U.N.C.L.E.’s medical team, given our distrust for hospitals (one too many blown covers or T.H.R.U.S.H. doctors soils the taste in your mouth). That is when I discovered I was carrying you.

Gaby's experience is heavily based on my mom's stories of being pregnant with me, how she felt, what happened, the emotions, etc 💕

Also, I made picrews of the Kuryakin child!!!!

Newborn

Toddler

Child

Pre-teen

Teenager/Young Adult

Prom!!

#tmfu #the man from uncle #illya kuryakin #napoleon solo #gaby teller #tmfu movie #illya x napoleon x gaby #fanfiction #fanfic #ao3

[ladylooch]

Hey! Talking about Emma and how her body changed during pregnancy and she stretched out a lot, Does it take a while for Emma to loose the baby weight bc I literally have a 1.5 year old and I still have like 15 lbs of baby weight left over that I probably will never loose but atp I’m just trying to own my body ya know also I never believed when every women who has kids said that your hips widen after childbirth and my god is that true I swear

I love how many mamas are here with us on this blog! It is so sweet to see you all here and being vulnerable about sharing your experience. I see you babes! Powerful, badass women! Woo!

Emma does not struggle to lose baby weight. She looks pretty slim even 8 weeks after when her and Timo get married. 

I don’t want you to feel bad by this because it hasn’t been your experience. We need to recognize that Emma has resources and genetics on her side. I mean, look at the Hischiers… they all have great, athletic and fit builds seemingly naturally. Plus, Emma and Timo have the financial freedom to support her weightless journey. She can afford to have a personal trainer come to her place so she doesn’t have to leave Lio. 

But to say her body snaps back to what it is would not be true. She has stretch marks and wide hips and some veins that never quite go back into her skin from the excess weight she carried. She is forever changed by pregnancy and although it takes a bit for her to love that, she does eventually. Her body created life from her and T’s love. It’s pretty damn impressive 🥰

#tm: loving & leaving

[horuhosu]

an (admittedly long) hol horse backstory 🤠

i denounce hol horse's backstory in the new crazy heartbreakers novel and have had a personal one for ages that i am currently turning into a fic, but i thought i'd finally share a summarized version here under the cut if you can’t wait for updates! of course, this is all my headcanon, so feel free to just read, go "that's cool!" and carry on :p

Childhood

to begin: this man's legal name is NOT hol horse. no way. we all know this. so!

holland daryl oates is born sometime in september 1963 to stephanie, who dies in childbirth & curtis, who is now a single father to a son. eventually, curtis remarries a woman named beth when holland is ≈ 3 years old. beth has a daughter of her own, kerry, who is about 12 years old. he has a good relationship with kerry - not so much with his dad (he sort of blames him for stephanie's death, but doesn't say it out loud) and his stepmother has always preferred her own daughter, but their relationship is not bad, per se.

(hol and kerry)

curtis & the blended family run a general store in a small town in texas, and holland helps grow produce and the like. he enjoys westerns and being outside like any texan boy would!

one day, holland just so happens to get angry at something - he gets bullied a lot at school and never stands up for himself, always has someone else go stand his ground with him. could stand up to people by himself if he wanted to, but..... doesn't like doing things by himself, and he never will enjoy doing things himself - after all, why be number one when you can be number two? a philosophy learned VERY early on. he's been in the backseat when compared to his older sister for years, and they work together well. why change it?

he's mad & upset... and alone in a field to let off steam, he feels this sudden weight in his hand. it is WAY too heavy for him, and he doesn't know what's happened, but he looks over and sees what appears to be a gun, way too big for him, in his hand.

a ... gun?

he's scared, but curiosity gets the best of him. so, he aims for this rock across the way. and he ... surprisingly ... doesn't miss. so he tries again for another target! and it doesn't miss! this is, however, simply beginner's luck (plus we know how Emperor works, so i won't waste time explaining.)

at this point, holland believes it to just be his silly ghost gun, and he has named it "Silver Secret." kind of lame, but he's maybe ≈ 8 years old, so leave him be. he's very impressed by it, but keeps it a secret. it's a gun, after all.

The Robbery and the Fallout

cut to months later, and what was meant to be a peaceful day is not. it's anything but. a man tries to rob the store with kerry behind the counter, demanding money and throwing around gendered insults. holland can't stand and watch his sister be disrespected and threatened. he has to do SOMETHING!

he can't do much, however, but he decides to try to scare the robber with "Silver Secret." a few warning shots.

and so he summons it and lets some bullets fly.

after that, he excitedly turns to kerry, happy to have saved her.

"didcha see, kerry? i have a gun! i can protect us!"

she did not see.

nobody saw.

all they saw was some kid making a finger gun, and now a man is bleeding out on the floor of the shop, soon being rushed to the hospital. however, this potential robber is dead on arrival.

as such, holland becomes an outcast - people are afraid of him despite him being just a little boy. what hurts him the most is that kerry is scared more than anyone - his own big sister, scared out of her mind to be around her little brother now after it seems he mystically killed a man. it has obviously scared the town as well, and the shop loses business to the point of shutting down. who would want to visit the store where a man died so mysteriously, owned by a man with a son as a killer?

the incident causes a huge fight between curtis and beth - his freaky son scarred her daughter and made them lose their business. it gets so rough and so rocky that words break it apart. as expected, this ends in their divorce, and beth takes kerry away with her. holland and kerry never see each other again, nor ever keep in contact. this incident strains curtis' and holland's relationship as well, obviously.

at 13, a few years after the incident, holland doesn't wanna go by his name anymore (who would?), but doesn't know what else to call himself, so he stays holland a bit longer.

it's at 18, when curtis kicks him out and tells him to fend for himself that holland comes up with his new alias - but not without stealing his father's favorite hat as a keepsake in the morning when he leaves. a final "fuck you" of sorts. it's his hat now and becomes a staple of his reinvented look. on the road, holland comes up with something he thinks is cool. it's kinda lame in hindsight, but he's ditching his real name in favor of it. i feel we can guess what this name is …

A New Alias

he starts going by hol horse, and he knows he has no clue wants he wants to do with his life. ends up a ladies' man, hired by people to do dirty work bc they'd heard the rumors of him doing a "mystical" killing when he was younger. hol realizes if people can't see his weapon, he's got no chance of being caught. this begins his foray into hitman work, and if that's what he needs to do…

this carries on for a while - hol's being a little bit of an asshole bc he's free to do whatever (though usually he's on the hunt for what pays best.) soon, he ends up in Egypt - he's making fair money and can travel the world. lots of people to kill, ladies to woo, places to see.

A Fated Meeting & New Work

however, hol is suddenly contacted through a letter by this strange somebody, who demands to see him, as they've heard of his "almost mystical weapon of choice." he goes to visit this mysterious man, who introduces himself to him and his right hand woman. this mysterious man asks him to show off this "mystical weapon" - and hol obliges.

this man then imparts the knowledge of a Stand to hol, and has his right hand woman assign it a card of the Tarot. upon meeting hol, and getting a feel for him as a person, he is assigned none other than the Emperor (though she thinks this card should belong to her son, truthfully). hol thinks that name matches a hell of a lot better than "Silver Secret."

as part of his goals to increase power and convince hol to stay under his wing, DIO promises riches upon riches, and pairs him with enya's son,  j. geil (note that hol never knows anything more ab j. geil than he is enya's son and their stands work well together. he learns about all his crimes and abuse towards women only after him and enya are dead.) 

something about hol feels untrustworthy, though, like DIO knows hol won't ever bow down to him, so he fleshbuds him just in case. 

for two years before SDC, they carry out DIO's wishes. eventually, DIO asks them to set out for the joestar group, and especially to watch out for a jean-pierre polnareff…

and then this, obviously, leads into SDC and canon as a whole. things then play out EXACTLY as you know them.

#hol horse #jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #jojo no kimyou na bouken #stardust crusaders #headcanons #hol horse 🐴

[everything-is-crab]

Straight/bi women literally don't see lesbians as women due to their lack of attraction to men.

Sex is the division of reproductive labor that men choose to exploit. Gender is the social construct to support and facilitate the exploitation and homophobia is literally a product of that system. Don't wanna use the word "comphet" because the word is quite debated, but people are expected to choose a partner of the opposite sex. It's not like lesbians are just liberated. If you don't wanna admit lesbians are also exploited on the basis of their reproductive ability means that you don't think they're women.

Idk why some people like to argue that just because *some* lesbians in more liberal countries are able to live a life without pregnancy that means lesbians as a class are unempathetic to women of other sexualities in matters of reproductive exploitation. I live in India and I cannot imagine making that statement as a bisexual woman. The way lesbians here are forced into marriage and to give kids to their family. Corrective rape is a thing here. If you're going to use your race as an argument against lesbians then also have the guts to think from the pov of lesbians from your race (she is mixed white-Indian). This is the lived reality of most lesbians in the world. They're not less impacted by any form of misogyny. This is why radfems must introspect and criticize their own work first before blindly worshipping authors like Simone de Beauvoir, whose ideas you have internalized. Just like lesbophobes today, she was bitter against lesbians, thought they hindered feminist movement cause she thought they were some class of "liberated" women. The sentiment is still very alive today.

I highly doubt that she (if yk who I am talking about then yk) and other women who agreed with her have given birth themselves, or plan to anytime soon. In my opinion, a country that's less homophobic is also relatively less misogynistic. So lesbians there aren't more liberated anymore than het or bi women. Just like them, you have as much choice to remain childfree and never be pregnant. The social pressure, retaliation etc is something lesbians do share with us.

Straight women think and say the worst things about each other. Give each other advice on how to lose weight after pregnancy and to look attractive again to their husbands again. Give advice to stitch to be "tight" again. Disapprove certain style of dressing while on or after pregnancy.

However, all such behaviors these women inflict on each other is called internalized misogyny. In case of lesbians tho, they're accused of "behaving like men" when lesbians have no power, no social institution to force straight women into pregnancy or any of the things related to it. When lesbians are themselves forced in het marriages and childbirth. You cannot claim they're like "men". This is such an insult to the lesbian and bi women activists in my country who have made female only orgs within LGBT cause neither male members of LGBT nor het women understand the unique position of wlw community in society.

#lesbophobia #not gonna disclose url cause she's painting herself as victim now and calling anyone who criticizes a bully #no matter how polite or civil you're being

[polkadotsocks1993]

Try To Breathe

Joel Miller x OFC

Summary: Lily knew it would happen any day now, but now that it's here, she didn't realize the emotions it would bring for everyone involved.

Warnings: childbirth, implied age gap, violence, canon divergence, PTSD, implied sexual situations

Notes: Hi everyone! This kind of got away from me, but I also wanted a more realistic childbirth scene (because I've had two kids with no meds, I promise it isn't as scary as the TV tells you) but I wanted to give Joel and Ellie something a bit happier. Thank you for all your support! ❤️

She'd thought she had no family left by the time she'd met Joel Miller.

She'd come from Nashville, choosing to escape the Atlanta QZ with her family. Her parents, her seven siblings, and a few people they'd picked up along the way. Lily had been eleven when the world effectively ended; gradually, she'd lost everyone she loved.

Her mother was the first to go; dying from an aggressive brain tumor that they'd only discovered a week after arriving at Boston. Lily had been thirteen then, and it was the first splinter in the slow shattering of her world.

Next came Lily's oldest sister, Emma, who died from hemhorraging in childbirth. Her baby was taken by Emma's husband, and they went north to Maine.

Then, it was Lily's brothers, Timothy and Aidan, who were killed trying to smuggle items out of the QZ. Lily's twin sisters Hannah and Hallie were infected on a supply run. Her remaining brother, Emmett, was killed in a mugging gone wrong inside the QZ. All of them died by the time Lily was twenty.

By the time Lily was twenty-two, she'd watched as her father, the only relative she had left with her, took his last breath. He'd been infected saving her, and the person to put him down had been the man who saved her life: Joel Miller.

Joel and Tess had become whatever semblance of a family Lily had. Her last remaining sibling, her sister Aileen, had left with her husband and a group to go to Cody, Wyoming by that time. After long enough without contact, Lily had just assumed they'd never made it.

---------

Lily had never intended on falling in love with Joel Miller, it happened so slowly that she didn't understand it until Frank, whom she considered one of her closest friends, had pointed it out.

"You look at him like he's your universe, Lily. And he looks at you that way, too."

She didn't think her heart could hold any love after the weight of the grief she carried. Her mother, her father, her brothers and sisters, her baby nephew--all of it hung heavy around her heart like a millstone, threatening to pull her under like a current.

Joel had been her first everything: her first kiss, her first time, the first man she'd allowed herself to be close to. Though he never said it, she knew the grief he carried kept him from being too hopeful. They couldn't afford something as expensive as hope in the nightmare their world had become.

It had all happened one night after Lily had saved Joel's life, shooting at a raider who had nearly shot him when they were smuggling medicine back into the QZ. Joel yelled at her, told her she was foolish for nearly taking a bullet for him, that she should never take risks like that. Lily had shoved him with all her might, her red hair wild in a fiery halo as all the years of pain and rage bubbled to the surface.

"I can't lose you, Joel!" She screamed, "I love you, I can't lose you, I won't lose you! I've lost everything else, you're the one good thing I have left!"

Joel had frozen at her admission, but then the floodgates opened. His lips found hers, and they fell into bed that night. His rough hands found her soft, pale skin, drinking her in like she was a fresh spring and he was a man dying of thirst.

"Are you sure you want this? I can stop. We can stop." Joel had asked, hovering above her. She'd nodded, green eyes locked on Joel.

"Never been so sure about anything, Joel." Lily promised. It was worth the temporary pain of her first time, so many things between them that didn't need to be said.

She'd given him her heart that night, and she'd never looked back, knowing that he might ever reciprocate the depth of love she felt. She'd take whatever she could get with him, even if that just meant sharing a bed.

That was five years ago.

Joel still had a lot of baggage; they all did, really. The grief was a heavy burden to bear, and Joel and Lily both carried their own, forgetting about it as they found each other underneath their threadbare sheets in the tiny apartment they shared.

Joel had started calling Lily his wife, and she never corrected him. She went where he went, despite his protests. They'd worked with Tess, the three of them becoming a unit, a weird semblance of a family. For Lily, it was all she needed, all she dared to hope for in this new world. Joel wasn't a soft man; he was jagged edges and hardness and fury. Lily never minded, knowing that gruff warnings, his rough hands holding her face, his stern commands, they were the way he showed how he cared. Lily never tried to fight for more. She loved Joel for the man he'd become in this new world, long gone were any girlish dreams of a soft man and a happily ever after.

Getting pregnant was not part of the plan. Not something she'd expected.

She and Joel had never discussed children--she had always figured that he didn't want that kind of attachment, and she was too scared to bring it up. It had been a night he'd nearly lost her, a random attack by some thugs who had tried to rough her up but didn't account for Joel being so close behind and recognizing her screams as she fought. He'd had a rage that night like Lily had never seen, until he turned and saw her face, pulling her to him with a crushing force that left her startled.

"We're going home. You're safe now." Joel whispered.

That night, he lost every inhibition he'd had. He'd gripped her hips so hard he left bruises and didn't stop. She'd let him take her, digging her nails into his shoulders and sighing his name with nearly every thrust. It was rough and primal, and Lily had never felt anything like it. He wrapped his fingers in her hair, pulling just hard enough to control her head while he kissed up her neck.

"You. Are. Mine." He growled as he left marks on her neck. Lily sighed his name as she lost all of her thoughts. By the time they were done, neither said anything. That night, he'd whispered that he loved her while he thought she was asleep.

She'd only pretended to be asleep.

------------

She'd suspected something for weeks. Not that she'd had any experience with pregnancy before, aside from Emma's, but every smell made her gag. She'd cried over small things, things that would never normally bother her before. She honestly hadn't cried in years. Then, of course, was the period that never came.

She'd confided in Tess, and Tess had followed her to the doctor and hugged her as the doctor confirmed she was about eight weeks along. She'd made Tess swear not to say anything to Joel. Tess assured her.

Unfortunately for Lily, Tess didn't need to say a word.

Joel was too smart not to suspect anything.

"You gonna tell me, or you gonna keep hiding it?" He asked, his fourth glass of whiskey in hand.

Lily had panicked, wringing her hands and bursting into tears. "Joel, I didn't plan it, I didn't do this on purpose."

"I know." Joel said, taking another sip, "how far along, you think?"

"Doctor said about eight weeks, and that was two weeks ago." Lily replied.

"Something was off, I knew that much. But Lily, two weeks? You didn't tell me for two weeks?" Joel asked, his voice irate.

"I didn't know... I didn't know how to tell you." Lily was sobbing now, all of her unsaid wishes and heartbreak and the sliver of hope cracking through the splintered cracks of her heart and overflowing.

"Joel, I don't expect you to stay. I know we've never talked about any of this, I know you don't want this. I don't--I don't expect you to stick around. I can do this. I'm so scared, but I want this. This is a good thing, and I want to be selfish. I've lost people before, Joel, so if you want to leave, I won't be mad, but I love this baby, and I can't go back." Lily confessed through tears.

Joel surprised her, closing the distance and wrapping his arms around her.

"I'm not leaving you alone. I wouldn't have done that before, I sure as hell won't now." He whispered.

"You never said--you never mentioned--"

"I know, Lily." Joel replied, "But we're here now. Time to make it work."

--------------

Lily was seventeen weeks along when the group agreed to take Ellie out West.

Joel had protested and swore up and down that she wasn't going, Tess did, too. But Lily, with her red hair and temper to match, dug her heels in.

"You said you wouldn't leave me. You're leaving. I'm going with you, whether you like it or not. I never heard from my sister, I'm not letting you two go knowing you might not come back. Worst case scenario, we find Tommy, maybe we find Aileen too. Anything is better than a Fedra QZ." She'd said to Joel, who was so mad he wanted to lock her up and throw away the key.

"It isn't safe out there!" Joel said, "You gonna have that baby on the road?"

"If I have to, yes! But say we take that kid out there, and we find Tommy, and Aileen. Say we find a better place. Do you really want this baby growing up here?"

Joel's jaw tensed. "You're not going go slow us down."

"I know." Lily replied.

"You will listen to me about everything. No questions." Joel snapped.

"I promise." Lily said. She moved toward Joel, taking his hand and placing it on her abdomen.

"Joel, the last twenty years of our lives have been nothing but disaster. What if we can fix this for our baby?" Lily asked.

"You sure you want to do this?" Joel asked.

Lily nodded. With that, Joel turned to Tess.

"Guess we're takin' the kid."

-----------------

Of course, that trip began with tragedy, with Tess getting infected. Lily had screamed, pleaded, fell to her knees. Not Tess. Not the only sister she had left.

"I can't have this baby without you!" Screamed Lily between sobs, "I need you!"

"You can, and you will. Look at me, Lily. Get Ellie out West. Take care of Joel." Tess had told her.

Tess had told Joel to save who he could save, and he promptly drug Ellie and Lily out by the arms as the state building went up in flames.

It was only a few hours later that Ellie looked at Lily, eyes wide.

"You're having a baby?" She asked. Lily nodded.

"Huh. I guess I didn't think he had it in him." Ellie shrugged.

For the first time, Lily laughed. Joel took notice.

-----------------------

After Joel's injury, the three sheltered in a cabin in the woods to nurse him back to health. Lily had acquired some medical knowledge, scouring over books after her family died, and she was able to patch Joel up as best she could. She'd managed to keep him healthy despite the risk of infection, and he had slowly but surely come back. By the time that Joel had gotten well enough to walk around, Lily was due any time. She figured she had about two weeks left until her due date.

"We don't have to stay here, Joel." Lily said, stoking the fire to cook what she'd foraged along with the deer Ellie had hunted the day before.

"Yes, we actually do. That baby is coming any day now, and we're not going on the road." Joel replied.

"I think I have to agree." Ellie said, "You're huge now. You can barely walk."

"You're supposed to be on my side." Lily huffed, "We need to be making time."

"After the baby is born." Joel promised, "It's too dangerous now. Stop asking questions."

Lily grumbled; she knew this was how Joel kept her safe, but she also felt helpless. The last few days had left her utterly exhausted, and she felt off in a way she just couldn't explain. Joel had insisted she eat more, had made her stop and rest. Even Ellie, who normally teased Joel, was in agreement: they wouldn't leave until Lily had the baby.

As it turned out, Joel was right.

------------

Lily woke the next day to a pain in her abdomen.

It wasn't sharp. She could still talk through it, but it was large enough to notice. She tried to go back to sleep, but was awoken ten minutes later by the same annoying pain. She pushed through it while making breakfast, leaning over the wood stove in the cabin. Ellie had noticed, stopping mid-chew to tap Joel on the forearm.

"Everything okay?" Joel asked.

Lily nodded, pretending she wasn't in pain.

"I'm fine, just those Braxton-Hicks contractions." Lily assured him.

"They might be real now, Lily." Said Ellie.

Joel walked over to her, rubbing her back just slightly.

"Keep your strength up. I think it's time. I'm going to get some stuff ready." Joel said.

Lily rolled her eyes, but was secretly thankful that Joel knew more than she did. Her mother had died before she could explain much about childbirth, and Emma's childbirth had ended so badly that Lily had all but blocked it out.

Joel had set to work, boiling water, getting blankets ready, and preparing a space for Lily. He'd been there when his daughter was born, he knew what took place. Lily had some idea from the books she read and from talking to Tess, but she was otherwise clueless.

By lunch time, the contractions were every seven minutes. They were uncomfortable, but she could still move through them. As she walked around the outside of the cabin, Ellie walked with her.

"Do you hope it's a boy, or a girl?" Ellie asked, trying to distract Lily.

"I know it's dumb to say I don't care, but I don't. I never thought I'd have this chance." Lily said, bracing herself against the side of the cabin. She could see Joel's watchful eye, and Ellie rubbed her back.

"I think it would be cool if you had a boy." Ellie said, "I wonder if he'd be as gloomy as Joel?"

Lily laughed, putting her hands on her hips and standing up straight.

"I hope not." Lily said, "But secretly, I'm hoping for a boy, too."

The contractions were starting to come closer now, slowly making Lily wretch from the severity of them. Ellie had timed them, they were starting to come every four minutes instead of every seven. Joel had walked around the cabin with Lily again, stopping as she felt the need to squat as a contraction overtook her.

"I'm sorry you're going through this." Joel said, "I should have been more careful."

"Joel, it was bound to happen." Lily replied, grunting through the contractions that were starting to get stronger, "We were sleeping together pretty often."

"I just forgot what having a baby looks like." Joel said, "Sarah's mom, she got pain medicine pretty quick, but her labor was pretty quick."

"My mom said her labor with Emma was nearly three days." Lily replied, rubbing her back as a contraction took over again, "It's one of the few things I remember. She had all of us at home."

"It's going to get worse before it gets better." Joel told her, "Just remember that."

---------------

By the time evening arrived, contractions were coming every two minutes. Lily was having a hard time keeping focus, so much so that she was starting to groan and growl as the contractions came over her in waves.

Then, the real challenge came as her water finally broke.

For all of the books she'd read, nothing prepared her for how strong the contractions became. No matter how Joel or Ellie tried to help, the contractions had her starting to scream, swaying from side to side and squatting as her instincts took over.

"You're getting close, honey. It won't be much longer." Joel assured her, running fingers through her hair.

The contractions came harder and harder, the pressure of the baby causing Lily to squat to get some relief.

"I can't do this, Joel." Lily cried, "I can't have a baby. I can't do this."

Joel took her by the shoulders, trying to center Lily as she panicked.

"Look at me, Lily. Yes, you can." Joel said, "You're going to have this baby, and you'll be fine."

"I don't want to do this anymore!" Lily screamed as another contraction came.

"You kind of don't have a choice." Ellie said.

Lily had managed to lean over the bed, Joel and Ellie on their side as she swayed.

"I want my mom!" Lily growled, panting as she took off her shirt, the heat becoming oppressive.

Joel and Ellie looked at each other, a silent conversation passing between each other as Lily continued to scream.

Joel placed a cool rag on the back of her neck, speaking to her as softly as he could.

"You're almost there, sweetheart. Let me check and see how close you are." Joel said, helping Lily into the bed. He helped her remove her pants, tossing them aside to take a look. Another contraction hit Lily, this time so strong that she moved nearly all the way up the bed.

"I can't do it anymore." Lily cried.

"Lily, look at me. You're almost done. I can see the baby, it's head is right there. You're gonna need to push." Joel said.

Ellie gripped Lily's hand, breathing with her as she cried.

One more contraction, and Lily began to push.

"You can do it, Lily, come on, keep going. Baby's coming." Joel said. Lily took a breath as Ellie placed a wet rag, cooled with snow, on her forehead and around her neck.

Another contraction, and Lily pushed with all her might.

"Head's out, sweet girl." Joel said.

"Get it out of me. Now." Lily cried.

"Almost there, you're doing good." Joel assured her.

"I can't do it!" Lily screamed as another contraction overtook her.

"You're doing it, Lily, keep pushing." Joel's voice was firm.

One more agonizing push, Lily screaming with all of her might, holding on to Ellie for dear life, and Joel pulled the tiny baby free, laughing incredulously.

"A son, Lily, we have a son!" He all but exclaimed, handing the wriggly, tiny baby to Lily.

"A boy?" Lily looked down and stared at the boy--her son--for the first time.

"Joel, look at him!" Lily cried, "look at our son!"

Joel leaned forward, kissing Lily's forehead.

"You did it, honey. You did it. Look at him." Joel whispered, "He's a tiny thing."

"I've never seen a baby before." Ellie whispered, her eyes locked on the tiny baby in Lily's arms.

Lily was in disbelief. The boy in her arms had the most beautiful dark hair and wide eyes. He looked so much like Joel that it took her back. She cried as her baby boy--their baby boy--cried. She brought him up to nurse, Joel giving her gentle instruction (as he'd said Sarah's mother had nursed too).

Her little boy. Her dark haired little baby. He was there. He was healthy.

As Joel and Ellie helped clean her up, they cut the cord and took the afterbirth out. Lily bled, but from what Lily could tell, it was a normal amount and nothing outrageous. As she laid in bed, nursing her new son, Ellie sat vigilantly at the end, staring constantly.

"Would you like to hold him, Ellie?" Lily asked.

"I've never held a baby." Ellie replied.

Lily leaned forward, handing Ellie the bundle in her arms. She helped Ellie adjust his head, and Ellie looked down, transfixed.

"I always wanted a little brother, never got one." Ellie whispered.

Without thinking twice, Lily said, "Now you have one."

Ellie blinked, Lily smiling slightly as she'd realized what she said.

"Joel said I was cargo." Ellie replied.

"Joel has had a hard life, Ellie." Lily reminded her, "He thinks that if he doesn't get attached it doesn't hurt as much."

Lily sighed, looking at the bundle in Ellie's arms, sleeping peacefully.

"Although now, I know. I know how much I'd hurt if I lost him, and he doesn't have a name yet." Lily whispered.

----------------

Lily left the baby with Ellie and walked outside to the porch. Joel had been sitting out there for over an hour. He was staring straight ahead. He'd washed the blood off of his hands and cleaned up as much as he could.

"What are you doing out here? Get back inside." Joel said.

Lily sat down next to him, taking his hand.

"I wanted to come check on you." Lily said.

"I'm not the one who had a baby." Joel replied.

"You helped. You kept me safe." Lily said, "You brought me my son."

"He's somethin' else, isn't he?" Joel mused, looking down at his hands.

"He looks just like you." Lily laughed.

"Don't say mean things about the baby." Joel said. Lily cracked a smile, swatting his arm.

"Joel Miller, don't joke like that. Your looks got you a hot younger wife."

"Stop that." Joel huffed, trying to pretend to be irritated.

"I couldn't have done this without you. Or without Ellie." Lily said, "I wish my parents could have met him."

"I wish Sarah could have met him." Joel said, so low Lily almost didn't hear.

"I know, baby. I like to think wherever my parents are, wherever my brothers and sisters and Sarah are, they all sent him." Lily said. Joel looked at her, an unfamiliar warmth in his eyes that Lily had never before seen.

"He needs a name." Joel offered.

"I think you should name him." Lily replied

"Why me?" Joel asked.

"Because you're his daddy. And he's going to love you." Lily said.

"There was a book, Sarah loved it, read the cover off. The boy, the main character, his name was Jesse. Sarah said if she ever got a brother, she wanted to name him Jesse."

"Bridge to Terabithia." Lily said, "I read that book, too. It was one of my favorites."

Joel looked at her, his eyes glassy. He took a deep, ragged breath, standing up and helping Lily to her feet.

"Jesse. Jesse Thomas. That's his name." Joel said, matter-of-factly, opening the door to let Lily inside first. The two saw Ellie sitting in the chair, still staring at baby Jesse, sitting next to the fire in a rocking chair.

"He has a name now." Lilly said, sitting next to Ellie to take the sleeping baby.

"What are you going to call him?" Ellie asked.

"Jesse." Said Joel, standing to take a look at the sleeping baby. Lily stood up, motioning for Joel to sit down.

"It's time you sit with your son." Lily said. She handed Jesse to Joel, the baby suddenly looking much smaller in Joel's big frame.

"I never thought I'd do this again." Joel whispered.

Lily leaned down, placing a kiss to Joel's temple. He leaned in slightly, holding Jessie's tiny hand in his own.

"You get some rest, Lily girl, I'll bring him back if he needs you." Joel promised.

Lily went back to the bed, Ellie going with her. Both fell asleep quickly, Lily feeling the events of the last day in every part of her body. Lily slept hard, not even moving, until she heard Jesse start to stir a few hours later. She sat up, looking at a snoring Ellie next to her, and walked into the living room. She leaned against the door frame, watching Joel cradle Jesse in his arms and rock him.

"Guess we should go get your mama now." Joel whispered, "She is something else, you'll see. She loves you so much."

"I love you too, you know." Lily said. Joel startled, momentarily tightening his hold on Jesse.

"I didn't see you there." Joel whispered, "He's starting to get hungry."

"Come sit. Get some rest, Joel." Lily said.

"I want to look at him some more." Joel said. Lily sat on the couch, putting Jesse to her chest to nurse. Joel sat at the end, propping his feet up and watching them.

"Being a daddy looks good on you." Lily whispered, taking Joel's hand in hers.

"I never thought I'd get to do this again." Joel confessed, "Maybe, if we get to Wyoming, and it's safe enough, maybe we could do it again."

Lily smiled so wide her cheeks hurt. "We just had him last night, and you already want another?" She teased.

"I'm gettin' old, Lily-girl. If we're gonna have more, better do it before you're changing my diapers, too."

Lily laughed so deeply that tears streamed out of her eyes. "I'd still do it, I told you, I'd follow you anywhere. But I think it'd be nice, Joel. If it's safe, I want more. This is what I always wanted."

"A baby?" Joel asked.

"No. A family." Lily replied.

"I realize I haven't...I'm probably not what you imagined..." Joel stammered.

"You're my husband, Joel. As far as I'm concerned, I've been Lily Miller since the first time you took me to bed. And I'll be Lily Miller for as long as I live. You guys are my family. This is all I've wanted. I knew what I was getting into with you, but you're a good man, Joel. And you gave me the most beautiful little boy. I hate how scary this world is now, but I have you. And I have him. And we have Ellie, too. This is all I need." Lily said.

Joel rubbed a hand over his face, leaning forward to place a kiss on Jesse's head.

"I'm gonna sleep. You get me if you need me, okay?" Joel asked.

"I promise. Get some sleep, you had a big day too." Lily replied.

Joel fell asleep quickly, making a pallet of blankets on the floor next to the bed.

Lily stayed awake for a while, staring at Jesse and watching Joel and Ellie. It had been a long road to get here, and it had been fraught with trouble.

But as Lily sat cradling her son, she allowed herself to be grateful. From the ashes of grief came something new, and for a moment, she would allow herself to feel happiness. She knew it might not last, she knew that bad things could happen.

But for now, her family slept in this cabin along with her, and in that moment, it was enough.

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